#lobster drow

[alicelufenia]

Just spent the last 15 minutes infodumping to my wife about drow, because that's one of my love languages and they are my hyperfixation right now. At one point I mention (im still rusty with lore so take with a grain of salt) that no drow has yet to die of old age, but always meet their end either in combat or poisoning, or straight murder/sacrifice/assassination, preferably by an ambitious offspring. So it remains inconclusive as to whether they even have a max lifespan.

At hearing this she came in with the comment "So like lobsters?"

And now I can't get lobster drow out of my head. Crustacean Gromph is over here pushing over 7 centuries. Lobster Liriel escaped the tank and it's now everyone's problem. Hard Shell Maine Minthara is pinching you SO hard right now.

[little-baby-steps]

Headcanon that elves are like *tall*. Like monstrous tall. High elves, wood elves, drow elves: they are built to be beautiful, in the shape of gods, but they are not gods, and gods are not people. Elves have something fundamentally *wrong* with them, not wrong in the context of “bad”, but wrong in that they have a spark of the beyond. Drow or high elf, whatever you pick, you are made for another place. Another world. This is not your home. There is a disconnect between the parts of elves which die and which do not die: they are immortal, but their brains, their minds age. One day all will descend into the forever trance, and not return. Lobsters can live forever if they can molt forever, shed their skin and shells. They are trapped in their form in the end, unable to shed. They starve. Elves are trapped.

[catsidhesilvie]

Ty for the tag \o/ - Three Ships & First Ever Ship:

Hummm I don't often ship, apart from sometimes npc/player character stuff if it is an easy conclusion haha!

Though if we are going that direction, in no particular order:

1) Tav/Astarion (BG3, good route)

2) Themis/WOL (FFXIV)

3) G'raha/WOL (FFXIV

First ship........... probably Ash/Misty from Pokémon ahahaha. That or Sam/Danny from Danny Phantom..... that one I still have fanart of floating somewhere yikes

- Last song: It's Alright by Mother Mother. I've been on a kick listening to their music lately because Oleander got wedged in my head.

Have some of my recent Spotify daylists though, if you want a weird look at my psyche 😂

Currently Reading: Homeland by RA Salvatore. I got a deal on a bunch of them and bc I love the drow lore I figure I may as well read the biggest series about them :D

Currently Consuming: Nothing. It's almost midnight and I'm headed to bed shortly. Also, I've been sick for the last week and have no appetite ;v;

Currently Craving: See last comment. Come back in a few days haha. Usually I'm a fan of sweets and seafood, generally.

Lately I had been wanting scallops. I'm allergic to shrimp and crab and lobster and so assumed it was a shellfish allergy, but read that most people who are allergic to those things can still have mollusks. I gambled and tried some stuffed scallops and OMG SO GOOD I could eat them and didn't get sick and could still breathe and it is all I've been missing in my life for the last few years since I became allergic.

Now I want to look into all the seafood recipes I can that use mollusks rather than shrimp/crab... Maybe after the holidays.

Tagging whoever wants to do this :D It is fun to meet and learn about people!

9 people you’d like to get to know better

Tagged by @arinaxiv, thank you! <3

Three Ships & First Ever Ship: I'm gonna respectfully skip these two, at least for know, for they're the culprits of me taking nearly three days to answer this! I'm not too much of a shipper and I'm struggling to remember enough ones that I liked, so am gonna leave them for another occasion!

Last Song: Èlan by Nightwish, an awesome song by an awesome group and you should check them out because they're awesome.

Currently Reading: I'm halfway through A Paradise Built in Hell , a beautiful book about how humans are at their best when disaster strikes and the communities and the solidarity that are born from the worst of circumstances.

Currently Watching: I'm alternating Jujutsu Kaisen with the 45th-and-current season of Survivor!

Currently Consuming: Am nomming popcorn. Lotsa popcorn. Nomnomnom.

Currently Craving: I've been wanting sushi for like two months, yet I remain sushiless. Life is truly cold and merciless.

Tagging @wingsformypillow @maeljade @qrowxiii @toffyandsalt @alaniathewitch @zeloinator @empyreansteel @catsidhesilvie @gatheredfates and anyone who feels like doing it!

[randomencounters]

Table of Were-Creatures

“Even one who is pure in heart / and says their prayers by night / may become a ___ when the night-flower blooms and the silver moon is bright.”

I’m not sure if I recommend using this with the Table of Races from a previous post (https://randomencounters.tumblr.com/post/631073167702687744/okay-fine-a-d100-table-of-races). I was trying this table out and, sure, a Drow Were-Styracosaur, a Succubus that turns into a Hyena when the moon is full, sure, but I’m not sure even I could handle a Mi-Go Were-Baleen-Whale.

Wolf

Bear (type appropriate to character’s native land)

Boar

Jackal

Hyena

Bat

Wild dudes with horns and hooves (d8: Deer, Moose, Ibex, Antelope, Gazelle, Fanged Muntjac, Saiga Antelope, Mountain Goat)

Big Cat (d4: Lion, Tiger, Panther, Jaguar)

Housecat

Domesticated Dog (d20: Chihuahua, Tibetan Mastiff, Great Dane, French Bulldog, Pug, Italian Greyhound, Golden Retriever, Black Lab, Basset Hound, Shih Tzu, Pit Bull, Husky, Beagle, Bichon Frise, Yorkshire Terrier, Corgi, Pomeranian, Boston Terrier, Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Schnauzer)

Rodent (d10: Field Mouse, Rat, Naked Mole Rat, Guinea Pig, Jerboa, Squirrel, Sugar-Glider, Chipmunk, Capybara, Anti-Magic Field Mouse)

Beaver

Skunk

Possum

Fox

Hedgehog

Star-Nosed Mole

Ferret

Otter

Snake (d6: Cobra, Rattle, Ball Python, Puff Adder, Gliding, Winged, Hoop)

Frilled Lizard

Snapping Turtle

Horned Lizard

Suchian (d4: Alligator, Crocodile, Gharial, Caiman)

Plesiosaur

Deinonychus

Herbivorous Dinosaur (d4: Stegosaur, Styracosaur, Brachiosaur, Ankylosaur)

Pterodactyl

Amphibian (d8: Bullfrog, Tropical Poison Frog, Spring Peeper, Surinam Toad, Chinese Mustache Toad, Axolotl, Salamander, one of those weird extinct hammerhead dudes)

Cow

Giraffe

Goat

Sheep

Horse

Llama or Alpaca

Armadillo

Sloth

Kangaroo

Platypus

Koala

Panda

Anteater

Aye-Aye

Ape (d4: Gorilla, Chimpanzee, Orangutan, Proboscis)

Elephant

Rhinoceros

Hippo

Tapir

Fowl (d4: Chicken, Duck, Goose, Peacock)

Wild bird (d10: Crow, Woodpecker, Hummingbird, Eagle, Hawk, Pelican, Vulture, Owl, Penguin, Dodo)

Freshwater Fish (d6 Catfish, Salmon, Sturgeon, Gar, Fancy Koi, Fur-Bearing Trout)

Saltwater Fish (d20: Lionfish, Puffer, Stingray, Remora, Swordfish, Coelacanth, Anglerfish, Stoplight Loosejaw, Gulper Eel, Blobfish, Hagfish, Mola-Mola, Electric Eel, Sarcastic Fringehead, Hammerhead Shark, Sawfish, Megamouth Shark, Goblin Shark, Wobbegong, Great White Shark)

Cetacean (d6: Orca, Walrus, Baleen Whale, Dolphin, Barking Seal, Narwhal)

Marine Mollusk (d10: Dumbo Octopus, Blue Ring Octopus, Mimic Octopus, Humboldt Squid, Vampire Squid, Magnapinna Squid, Colossal Squid, Cuttlefish, Clam/Oyster/Mussel, Spiny Conch)

Crustacean (d6: Blue Crab, Snow Crab, Hermit Crab, Lobster, Mantis Shrimp, Pillbug)

Other marine invertebrate (d10: Starfish, Jellyfish, Sea Urchin, Sea Cucumber, Bobbit Worm, Anemone, Anomalocaris, Opabinia, Barnacle, Glaucus)

Arachnid (d8: Tarantula, Spiny Orb Weaver, Cartwheel, Black Widow, Regular Scorpion, Vinegaroon, Tick, Horseshoe Crabs which are apparently Arachnids)

Centipede

Insect (d10: Stag Beetle, Mayfly, Stick Bug, Wasp, Moth, Camel Cricket, Junebug, Earwig, Bullet Ant, Orchid Mantis)

Snail (d10: 1-6 garden, 7-9 venomous, 10 Flail)

Ooze (d4: Banana Slug, Gelatinous Cube, Green Slime, Black Pudding)

Lurker or Trapper

Roper or Darkmantle

Bag of Devouring

Rust Monster

Owlbear

Dragonet (roll d10: Red, Green, White, Black, Blue, Gold, Silver, Brass, Bronze, Copper)

Duckbunny

Bullette

Flumph

Mimic

Displacer-Beast

Blink Dog

Elemental/Paraelemental (d8: Fire, Water, Air, Earth, Lava, Ice, Lightning, Void)

Wyvern

Bonnacon

Basilisk/Cockatrice

Pegasus

Unicorn

Phoenix

Mongolian Death Worm

Fresno Nightcrawler

Cryptoleporidae (d4: Jackalope, Skvader, Rasselbock, Wolpertinger)

Elwetrisch

Dungavenhooter

Squonk

Sidehill Gouger (aka Prock, Hunkus, Gyascutus)

Avalerion

Rhinogradentia

Fiji Mermaid

Pokemon of choice

Pixie

Giant

Worm-on-a-string

Venus Fly Trap

Car

Chimaera (traditional Lion-Goat-Snake)

Chimaera (reroll this table three times for the three animals to combine)

Randomitemdrop.tumblr.com/random 

Randomencounters.tumblr.com/random

[theresa-nam-nam-me]

|yandere ghost hoseok |

Roomates

Yandere ghost hoseok x reader

Masterlist

Summary→you were filled with joy to have finally move in to your new apartment you weren't told you would have a roommate though, a possessive one at that.

Warnings: yandere theme, possessive behavior

"Yes!" You screamed you had finally got the email, the email confirming that you indeed got your new apartment. You were overjoyed, to say the least.

-time skip 1 week

You had finally got most of your new furniture moved in the only thing you had to do now was unpacked some cups and silverware. You signed looking at the clock, you had been unpacking since 7 and now it's 3 am, "I'll go to bed right after this" you promised yourself. You started placing silverware In the drawer when you felt a cold breeze pass you by making your skin crawl. You looked behind you for a source but found nothing. Blissful unaware of the man watching.

Hoseok sat on the counter watching as he always did, you fascinated him, he couldn't take his eyes off you.after 3 years of loneliness unable to reach the heavens, he was stuck on earth.

You closed the drow and grabbed the cups starting to place them in the cabinet, you grabbed the last wine glass. You reached up on your toes trying to push it in the tallest shelf with the tip of your finger that's when a transparent hand reached above you gently pushing the cup in its place. You quickly retracted your hand and whipped your head around. A semi-transparent, tall, brown-haired man with all white clothing stood in front of you. Your eyes were both wide staring right back at each other, "please don't be scared!" He yelled making you jump

"How did you get in my house?!" You shutter out, "oh i... This actually uses to be my apartment before i died.." You gave him a confused look. Dead? Translucent? This man was a spirit of some sought? "Your..a ghost?" You asked still dumbfounded "ah, i guess you could say that my names hoseok," he said with a smile "y/n" there was a dead man in front of you. "I promise I'm a good spirit, i won't hurt you...your just so captivating," he said the last sentence under his breath. Before you had the chance to reply the doorbell rang and when you looked back he was gone.

For the next few weeks, hoseok would appear more often, even when you couldn't see him you knew he was around because objects would be moved from there place. You never minded hoseoks present he seemed to have nothing but good intentions.

"Goodbye y/n" you heard as you grabbed your bag, "oh hoseok there you are, I'll be home late today and I'll be bringing someone home tonight" hoseok gave you a confused look "why? who are you bringing home?" He asked "i have a date tonight, see you later" you waved him goodbye before closing the door. "A date hu?"

---------

"Y/n nice to see you again," the male said taking a seat at the table "nice to see you too Jackson" you smiled picking up your menu. "Do you know what your gonna order?" He asks looking down at his menu "i think I'm gonna order the lemon garlic shrimp" he hums in agreement "ill get that too" he said folding up his menu. "Can i get you too anything?" The waiter asked clicking her pen "two garlic shrimps please" she nodded walking away. "So y/n how's your new apartment?" He asked "oh it's great, i finally finished off moving the last box of stuff a few days ago" you smiled "that's great, I can't wait to see the new place" you nodded a lot happily "here's your lobster" the waiter placed down both your plates "thank you"

----

"Wow, y/n you really hit the jackpot with this place" you giggled as his eyes wondered "thank you, I'm going to go clean up myself a little" you said making your way to the bathroom. You fixed your hair and started washing your hands "who's he?" You jumped at hoseoks voice behind you "oh, hoseok you scared me" you said looking at him through the reflection "who is he?" He repeated "Jackson, I met him at work last week and he asked me out" he didn't reply before silently disappearing, you shrugged it off as him not being in a talkative mood and walked out of the bathroom. "What's wrong?" You asked seeing Jackson's pale face, "they just fell" you looked over at the kitchen seeing the knife scattered around the kitchen floor you both stared in silence before a plate was thrown at Jacksons' head, he quickly moved out of the way dodging it. "I'm gonna go, you should move" he said before quickly making his way out the door.

You sighed with a pout before your face turned bitter "HOSEOK!" You shouted in anger "yes sunshine?" He smiled appearing behind you "what the fuck is wrong with you?! I really liked him!" You screamed in his face "I didn't like him" his face turned sour with a scoff "I don't care, you don't get to have a say in my relationships hoseok!" He grabbed you face bringing it closer to his as a cold gust chilled your body

"You are mine, you got that sunshine? I am here to stay!"

[ravel-puzzlewell]

Ari: 5, 18,26,33,35,42,48,49,50,53,55

49. What are some themes tied to your character’s story?

“No wonder we cannot appreciate the really central Kafka joke: that the horrific struggle to establish a human self results in a self whose humanity is inseparable from the horrific struggle. That our endless and impossible journey toward home is in fact our home.”

— David Foster Wallace, Consider the Lobster and other essays

Ari’s central theme is this precise struggle to establish a self, but under a pressure of being perceived in a world that enforces a bunch of roles and identities on her. Being a half-drow girl in a small-minded village and having a cold, judgmental father, she knew from a very young age that there are acceptable and not acceptable selves, and if you show the world the wrong thing, you will be punished. And not just show the wrong self, but if you perform the right self in an unsatisfactory manner, you will not be accepted either. Like, she was a small orphan girl being bullied, but parents never took her side, because she was a grey-skinned drow child of this weird elf loner and she didn’t dress or look or behave like little girls, because she didn’t have a female role model and Daeghun just dressed her practically and didn’t bother giving her “feminine” cloth. So she watched other girls like a zoologist studying an animal behavior and adopted the patterns like “Oh hey guys, check out what a Hyper-real Idealistic Femininity I’ve got there, I think I deserve some acceptance and validation for that, huh?” Of course this realization that it’s not enough for her be something, people will only treat her like that thing if she performs what they expect from it lead to her building up a lot of resentment. And she never got a chance to figure her true self out as the pressures and expectations were being piled on her, up to saving Neverwinter. So Ari felt like a collection of masks hiding an empty center, where she doesn’t even have a self, just resentful rage and a bunch of shadows. She only got to figuring herself out in MotB, bc MotB was not about saving a kingdom, but about saving herself, and to save herself she needed to first define it.

33. How have they changed over time?

in original NWN2 Ari doesn’t really change, just grows better and better at performing what everyone around expects from her and becoming more and more bitter and angry because of that under a ethereal sweetness that she coaxed over herself. in MotB she’s finally forced to confront herself and realize that she’s not actually a despicable monster incapable of love and good things that she believed she was her entire life. She also came in terms with her masks, and being able to find her “self” and so to distinguish what part is a role and what part is she, Ari is now much more in control of the performance instead of compulsory mirroring the expectations. If before the world was theater and she was the actress, now she is also directing the play. She… well, not calmed down, she’s still very Extra™, but she’s lost the self-loathing self-destructive violent edge.

48. What was their lowest point? What was their highest point?

Lowest point is def the end of act 1 start of act 2 of MotB when Ari thought she can’t control the hunger and also because all she could feel inside is raging darkness and she couldn’t tell apart where is she and where the soul-eater, so she was completely unraveling at the seams. The highest probably when she went back to Neverwinter and saw that people of the Crossroad Keep are still aggressively loyal to her, and Kana is keeping off Nasher from annexing the Keep with lawful bureaucratic nonsense like Penelope waiting for Odysseus to return.  

53. Expectations vs Reality: what did you expect and what did you get with this character?

I didn’t expect anything when I just started nwn2, I usually see what narratives and themes the game offers me and form a character I think would be the most interesting to explore them with. If we talk about defying the expectations, it’s probably that I expected her story to be over at the end of nwn2. I was  disappointed with the ending, but on some level I saw it as fitting - Ari didn’t have the character development as much as self-destructive spiral throughout the game, and she died after her biggest victory, she always wanted, but never could live for herself, ceasing to exist as Neverwinter didn’t need her anymore, a heartbreaker who was only loved for what’s projected onto her, a shadow disappearing when the masks covering it are smashed by rocks. And then Mask of the Betrayer happened, and gave me not just a story custom-tailored to the themes and development of Ari, but also with love interest having parallel thematic arc of performing vs true selves. Even the flaws of OC NWN2 were post factum justified, like characters being one dimensional because that’s how Ari saw them vs layered, complex characters in MotB bc she learned to let people have their own agency and not just as objects that she needed to manipulate in order to save. It was truly a poetic cinema moment. At the end of nwn2 I thought Ari would be a sad character from a mediocre game that never gave her space to grow, and she ended up as my absolute fav OC in motb.

50. What are some motifs associated with your character?

Masks, shadows, Fae glamour, flowing shimmering silks, mirages, lightning, sky, esp in transitional stages between night and day times, twilight or the blue hour before the dawn, labyrinths made out of lilac hedges with a monster in the center.

Her general vibe is this post: “She had the confidence of a well organized library and the haunted grace of a moonlit cemetery.”

5. Height and Body type 

Ari is tiny, like, not comically so, but pretty distinctly even for a half-drow. Half-elves are on average human-sized and shaped, and half-drows are normally just a bit smaller, but Ari’s mom was a half Moon elf herself, so Ari is actually just a quarter human. So if normally half-elves look more like humans with some elvish characteristics, Ari looks like a watered down elf. Still lithe and bony, with sharply defined features and elongated limbs, but the aggressive angularity is smoothed down. It’s most obvious when she’s standing next to pureblood elves like Sand or Daeghun, who are pretty much made up only out of triangles and straight lines, and Ari has some ovals and curves.

18. Have any special keepsakes?

Not really for herself, Ari is not sentimental at all. Her familiar tho collects shiny and interesting things like all magpies, and Ari has a designated pocket on her bag to carry it.

26. Guilty Pleasure

Interesting question for Ari. by the end of nwn2 original campaign she would technically classify as like high functioning alcoholic with also occasional drug abuse. But that’s just coping mechanisms, not pleasure. Having a breakdown and fucking several succubi in your Keep’s basement is also I feel like shouldn’t count as guilty pleasure, it’s just Ari’s equivalent of crying in the bathroom for 10 minutes, then fixing your make up and going out to get shit done. It’s “I can have a little drug-infused orgy, as a treat.” So for guilty pleasures… probably just junk food.

The ask meme

[dungeonsanddargonsandsteve]

Saltmarsh Session 1: Lobster?

We did our first session! I’m gonna start this one off with an updated cast list because I missed a few key points last time..

Nayeth Windward - Female Eladrin sea-soul sorcerer, ~150 years old. Blue skin, white hair, sailor outfit. Looking for adventure. Recently arrested for drunk and disorderly conduct. Played by me.

Jhetzka “Jet” Ulo’avetynrar - Male Drow bard, ~250 years old. Purple-black skin, rainbow dyed hair, bright colored clothes. Outwardly bubbly and outgoing, less happy inwardly. Has a parrot named Bartlett. Recently wrongly arrested for extortion because of anti-Drow racism. Played by Y.

Sincerity - Female Tiefling rogue, ~20 years old. Bronze skin, black hair, small forehead horns, cloak and hood. Have yet to get a good read on her (this probably means she’s playing well). Recently arrested for involvement in smuggling, which she insists she absolutely did not do. Really. Played by E.

Mackinnon Currie - Male Dwarf cleric, ~60 years old. Curly hair, looks like a dwarf. Is very defensive of the party members with less conventional races, suffers from “Dwarf guilt”. Recently arrested for healing someone he wasn’t supposed to heal. Played by C.

We’ve been let out of jail as part of a community service/rehabilitation program and are being shipped off to the backwater fishing town of Saltmarsh at the request of a local councilman named Anders. Our first assignment? Cleaning up the local haunted house.

There is a letter telling us this, more or less, and not much more. It does have a whole contract’s worth of terms to follow in our haunted house cleaning expedition, but who cares about those? We get to explore a haunted house! Nayeth is very excited.

We have a month-long sea voyage to get to Saltmarsh. Nayeth loves it, Sincerity is sick of sleeping on hammocks, Mackinnon spends most of the trip throwing up. Councilman Anders and the local head of the guard meet us at the docks; after standard introductions and banter we manage to make a good impression. Anders is surprisingly young, seems like a good guy, and is a bit slow at picking up on sarcasm. We proceed to use sarcasm around him constantly.

Anders walks us through town to the city council; we attract a fair amount of attention due to our more exotic party members (see: everyone except the dwarf) but surprisingly enough nobody’s openly racist to us. Outside the council, we hang out with Anders for a bit and he gives us a rundown on local politics:    -Saltmarsh has recently attracted the attention of the king    -This is because he wants to expand his influence in the Azure sea    -This basically means that the feds are gonna try to run the place    -Obviously many of the locals don’t like this    -A lot of them extra don’t like this because they’re smugglers Basically there’s a lot of tension, and Anders figured that it’d be a good time to bring in some outside help to clean up some of their problems so everyone’s under less stress, and that’s why we’re here.

The council consists of a couple people that we again manage to somehow impress and whose names I’ve forgotten. I do remember the DM’s description of the human man: “He looks extremely foppish. If ever anyone has fopped, this man has fopped most of all.” There’s also a dwarf woman, who seems chill and gives Mackinnon some good drink recommendations for the local taverns.

After talking to them, Anders, and the guard chief (who in general seems to be the most competent adult in the room), we ascertain a few things about the haunted house:    -It was originally owned by an alchemist who died ~20 years ago    -It’s been abandoned since then    -People hear shrieking in the house    -Sometimes people also see lights, but nobody we’ve talked to has People’s belief in this ranges from “That there house is haunted as shit, I seen it meself” to “This is entirely bullshit”. The party remains agnostic, but I personally put a lot of stock in the guard chief’s take that “something’s probably going on but it probably isn’t ghosts”.

Chief guard also mentions that the shrieking sounds kinda like owlbears, and recommends that “the last time I heard an owlbear nearby, I fed it my leg to shut it up.”

Regardless, our primary lead is “some guy the tavern owner overheard”. Anders originally had his name written down, but accidentally dropped it in the harbor while waiting for us. Nayeth is annoyed at him for not telling her so she could dive in after it. Jet proposes that we raid the haunted house at dark because it’s thematic and that’s when the ghosts are out (beating Nayeth to the same suggestion). This has the ENTIRELY accidental side benefit that Jet doesn’t have to deal with sunlight sensitivity. It also conveniently gives us time to interview the tavern owner!

Her name is Hannah, and she is a friendly halfling who’s happy to share helpful information with us. She even sets us up with some of the tavern’s house special: Claw Wine. This looks “like vodka, but slightly pink and really cloudy.”

Us: “So not actually like vodka at all?”

DM: “...yeah.”

Nayeth goes for it first. After she passes constitution save, the DM asks “is Nayeth the kind of person who would immediately blurt out the first thing she thought of?”

Me: “...that is actually a really good character read.”

DM: “Lobster.”

Me and Nayeth: “Lobster???”

So apparently Claw Wine’s secret ingredient is lobster. I’m still mad. Mackinnon and Sincerity both give it a try, pass the con save, and decide that it’s all right. Jet respectfully declines, and instead plays a sea shanty for the arriving taverngoers. After a quick roll, the DM determines that the customers start singing an alternate version of the lyrics. The original was about sailors being seduced by mermaids. In this new version, the sailors are instead seduced by a bountiful harvest of lobsters, and when leaning toward them capsize their vessel. The song ends with the drenched sailors arriving home, oddly lumpy under their clothes. When questioned, they lift their shirts to reveal dozens of lobsters clamped to their chests. Everything has become beautifully surreal.

The NPC with info on the haunted house (his name is Fred) eventually arrives, and is quickly convinced (with the lubrication of additional Claw Wine) to tell his story. Apparently he tried to raid the house, because “Alchemists make tons of wine, right?”, but was scared off by the shrieking, as well as an apparent instinct that his soul was about to be stolen. This isn’t amazingly informative, largely because Fred seems to be a dumbass, but he did tell us a bit about the layout of the house so that’s nice. Nayeth promises him that if her soul’s stolen, he’ll inherit her share of any wine that we find.

It’s getting dark, and the haunted house is a couple hour walk away, so we say our goodbyes to the tavern populace and head out into the night. For some reason everyone keeps asking if we’re sure we want to do this at night (the answer is “obviously yes”). The journey is uneventful, and we arrive at the door of the house just in time to end the session.

So, in summary: Lobster.

[sduswdnd]

Campaign 1 Part 3

From part 2

When last we left our adventurers, they’d delivered their wagon of crap and explored the town.  They were told that an old 90s band were terrorizing the masses and decided to help.  They also were recruited into three other money making schemes and were asked to help Orlando Bloom find the man that ghosted him on Druidr.  After scoping out the hideout, they decide to enter it under disguise.  After freeing prisoners, they encounter the Rancor, who just wants to run away.  They spot a cracked out rat and follow it to the missing wizard, Knowing he’d been found out, he starts to spill his guts about the whole crafty tale.  He and a guy named the Black Spider, who wanted to steal the Wokscraper brothers’ timeshare.  They finish looting- I mean clearing the ruins before heading back to town.  

Part 3

“Hello!  Hello?  Is it over yet?”  Korrin comes wandering in with a full flask of whiskey and a five-foot frozen lemonade.  “Hello?”  He wanders into the ruins, looking around.  He spots a body in the crevasse.  “Hope I didn’t know that guy…”

“You didn’t.”  Baze stows his blades and looks down at the body.  He notices something sparkly down in the darkness and says, “Shiny!” and jumps down into the crevasse.  

Silvan says, “Shiny?” and jumps in too.

Korrin starts to say, “Maybe check forrr not…”

“Hey guys!  It’s a shiny!  And it’s stuck in the wall!”

Gerrol looks at the rancor (whose name is Roger).  “Well, you’ve seen these guys.  They’re gonna go ‘Link’ on this whole place and crack open everything that moves.”

Roger says, “No, I’ll never get my security deposit back.  Just take what you want, but get the hell out!”

Teiris looks around, noticing a censor bar near Iarno’s quarters.  “Hey, what’s behind here?

Korrin touches his holy symbol, then moves his hands, drawing mysterious sigils in the air.  The gold glyphs shimmer in the cold air then flash, seeking the obscured area, fluttering as the energy charges and darts into the darkness, then back to Korrin, circling him before compacting together, then exploding like tiny fireworks.    

Korrin looks at Teiris.  “Porn.”

Capt looks around wizard quarters, puts her right hand in the boxes, pulls her right hand out, puts her right hand in and shakes it all about.  The rest of the group is compelled by copyright to do the hokey pokey and turn themselves about.  

Because that is actually what it’s all about.

“Found some sparkly things!

Baze looks at the sparklies, and a strange look comes over him.  “A glassy, translucent stone, Carnelian is an orange-colored variety of Chalcedony, a mineral of the Quartz family. Its color varies from pale pinkish-orange to a deep rusty brown, though it is most known for its brilliant orange and red-orange crystals. Its name comes from a Latin word meaning "flesh."  In antiquity, as well as today, Carnelian is believed to help timid speakers become both eloquent and bold. Ancient Warriors wore Carnelian around their neck for courage and physical power to conquer their enemies.”

“So you’re saying they’re valuable?”

“Dibs!”

The last loot box is found and opened, and back to town they go.

~~~~****~~~~

Silvanhost and Gerrol drag Iarno to the town hall, leading the rest of the group.  Sildar looks up, shock and surprise on his face.  “You’re alive…” he breathes softly.

Iarno looks sheepishly at Sildar.  “Hey, bae…”

Sildar struts up to him and, with a silver gauntleted hand, strikes him, yelling as he strikes:

“WHO (SLAP) THE FUCK (SLAP) ARE YOU (SLAP) TO GHOST (SLAP) ME, BITCH (SLAP)!”

Mirea and Teiris snap in Z formation.  “UM HMM!”

Sil and Gerrol hiss, “Daaaaaammmnnnn…”

Sildar grabs his collar and starts to drag him off.  Iarno starts to stammer, “Bae, I can explain…”

Sildar cuts him off.  “Don’t you ‘bae’ me.  I found your Druidr profile, Mister Glasscock.  Ain’t nothin needs explainin…”

Sildar then looks at our heroes.  “This fool has a lot to answer for.  I have to take him back to his homies, but we still need to find Clockwatcher.  I can tell you he was taken by this idiot and a Drow called the Black Spider.  If you wait for me to take care of him, I can help you get Rackstuffer.”

Our heroes look at each other.  Maik and Baze fistbump.  “It’s whiskey and wench time!”

~~~~~***~~~~~

The next morning, our heroes check their messages with the front desk clerk.  Mirea had to get her armor mended.   She threatens bodily harm if we storm the castle without her.

Traxion pulled a muscle posing for AQ.  He’d be laid up for a few days but wanted to get his headshots done at the castle too, so don’t leave without him.

The group gathered up in the common room for breakfast.  “So, no Pockmarker today.”

“No Sockwalker.”

“So whaddayawannado?”

“Didn’t those folks that we rescued offer us cash or something?”   The group stare at each other, then scramble out of the inn.

Several minutes later, they’re in front of Nards’ home.

[Editor’s note:   Nards?]

[Author’s note:  That’s what the notes say.]

[Editor’s note:   Did they hate their kid?]

[Author’s note:  eh]

In front of the home, the young man comes to the door.  “Oh, no, we didn’t actually have any money, but if you check out our storage unit, you can have whatever looks good.  I think there was some jewelry and stuff.”  Discouraged, they leave. 

Back at the inn, everyone is draped all over the common room.  

“BORED….” says Gerrol.

“We told them we’d wait to storm the castle.”

Maik repeats, “BORED…”

Korrin looks up from sharpening his blades.  “Weren’t there orcs we were supposed to beat up?”

Everyone looks at Korrin, then to each other, then scramble out the door.

~~~*~~~~

Our heroes head east for several hours.  

“Are we there yet?”

Korrin hisses, “If you don’t stop, so help me I’ll turn this party around.”

Baze looks around and points.  “Do trees grow sideways?”

They all look at him, then to the area he’s pointing to.  There were trampled trees, dried grass, and a large green screen.  

“That doesn’t look suspicious at all,” says Gerrol.  “But let’s poke it with a stick.”  He and Baze make their way to the screen and poke at it.  It falls over, revealing a small cave opening.  “Hey guys…”

Suddenly, somewhere, the battle music starts.  

They discover a lone orc at a watch post.  Baze quickly dashes behind a nearby sunflower.  “Stealth!” he shouts at the orc, who spots him, confused.  Its confusion was more than enough to give Baze a moment to take it out.   He ded.  They hide the body under the green screen and enter the cave.  

Heading into the cave, they realize caves are dark.  “Who has dark vision?”  Three of them raise their hands.  “Cool,” Baze says, attaching an LED lantern to his head, effectively blinding the other three.  Deeper into the cave, they came across another familiar scent. 

[Editor’s note:  Waffles again?]

[Author’s note:  That’s what it says.]

[Editor’s note: Is this going to be a thing?]

The scent of waffles filled the air as they round the corner.  The brunch bar was in full swing.  Several orcs were in line for fresh waffles, while others loaded up on the free mimosas.  Two orcs see new arrivals and break away from the line. 

“Hey, you!  This is for card holders only.  Did you show your players club card at the door?”

Gerrol pats his clothes.  “Yes, I have it right… HERE!” he says as he shanks the first orc and joins the one-shot club.

The second orc looks yells, “Hey, I don’t think you guys are members!”  

Baze yells, “Stealth!” and hides behind the yogurt machine.  He then dashes out, slips on the spilled sprinkles and misses his strike.

Silvenhost comes up and yells, “No cuts!” as he slices the orc once, twice, three and down.

Another orc comes up to the yogurt machine, angry that it wasn’t working.  He turns his anger to our heroes.  Cap responds with an arrow.  Teiris tries to help, but breaks her bowstring.  Maik casts entangle, and ties up the rest of the orcs charging them.  

The two floor bosses come up, one of them a large one with a nametag reading “Axebiter-Manager.”  Korrin charges the manager, but gets hurt in the process.  He says he’s gonna heal himself.  Silvenhost whispers, “Touch yourself… slowly.”  They both recover hit points.

Teiris notices orcs going to the buffet with dirty plates.  She yells, “YOU NEED TO USE A CLEAN PLATE EVERY TIME YOU RETURN TO THE BUFFET, YOU BLOUSE WEARING POODLE WALKERS!”  The orcs in the area are stunned and embarrassed, shuffling away.

Maik preps to attack but hears Korrin moaning behind the party.  He goes to heal him, “You may feel some discomfort…”

“That’s what she said!”

Silvan and Teiris notice one orc trying to call security.  They intercept him.  Teiris breaks another bowstring.  Silvan snorts at her, then strikes the orc, taking him out. 

Finally, it’s just our heroes and the manager.  Axebiter starts swinging wild.  Cap and Silvanhost keep swinging at him.  Teiris tries to diffuse the situation with a joke:

“What’s the difference between a dirty trolley stop and a lobster with breast implants?  One's a crusty bus station, and the other's a busty crustacean.”

** crickets **

“You guys suck!”

The battle continues.  Everyone flails ridiculously, setting the salad bar on fire and destroying the yogurt machine, and but finally the battle is won.  Silvan lops the head off the last orc and ties it to his belt.

“That’s a bold fashion statement.”  Silvan twirls, then smiles.

They get back to the mayor, and the orc head gets tossed to the floor.  The Mayor screams,  tosses his cookies, and passes out.  When he awakes to everyone staring at him.

“Please don’t tell anyone I passed out, and I’ll give you 400 gold instead of 200…”

They all agree and head to the pub.  Cap gets sauced and says, “Bard!  Entertain us with a song!”

Teiris is happy to comply:

How does a bastard, orphan son of a human  and an elf, dropped in the middle of a forgotten spot by the imperium By providence, impoverished, in squalor, grow up to be a hero and a scholar?

With ten gold he set out, leaving his father, got a lot stronger by working a lot harder, by being a lot smarter By being a self-starter, then Rockseeker placed him in charge of an escort charter

And everyday while gold was being taken and carted away Across the fields, he struggled and kept his guard up Inside he was longing for something to be a part of The brother was ready to beg, steal, borrow or barter

Then a zaratan came, and devastation reigned Our man saw his future drip, dripping down the drain Put his sword in his satchel, connected his belt around And he killed his enemy, the ones that could be found Well the word got around, they said "This dude is insane, man!" Took up a collection just to send him to the main man "Get your education, don't forget from whence you came And the world's gonna know your name. What's your name man?"

Traxion the Paladin My name is Traxion the Paladin And there's a million things I haven't done But just you wait, just you wait…

And the pub goes wild.  

The next morning, they go shopping.  Maik finds a mysterious set of runestones and is drawn to touch them.

“Dude, if you touch them, you have to rub them.”

Maik backs away.

Somewhere, the Ghostbuster theme starts.  They head off to see the banshee.

On the road, an unusual feeling comes over the group.  They look out and see four wolves coming closer.  

Maik says, “I got this.”  He turns into a wolf, sits down and starts licking himself.  

“Now is not the time!” yells Cap.

Maik whines then goes to one of the wolves. They start sniffing each other, making friends.  The second wolf doesn’t want to feel left out and wanders over, joining the sniffing parade.  

Teiris shakes her head and casting Thaumaturgy, causes a small earthquake, scaring off the other two wolves and lowering property values on the coast.  Yay!  No blood, no report!

Off to Aggies!  Maik starts running, dodging Silvanhost’s attempt to hop on his back.  He does allow Baze to hop on and away they go.

[Editor’s note: What’s with Baze always wanting to ride Maik?]

Cap yells, “Don’t kill anything until we get there!”

Soon, they get to Aggies.  Baze wanders inside, begins getting hosed by the spirit.  Silvanhost cuts in, speaking in Elvish.  Gerrol starts translating for the group:

Silvanhost:  So… you come here often?

Aggie:  giggles in Elvish

Silvanhost:  (holds out comb)  I think you left this on my bedroom floor last time…

Aggie:  giggles more in Elvish

This goes on a few minutes longer, and they get the location of the book the sister needs.  Back to the town they go!

[Editor’s note: Well, that was anticlimactic.]

[Author’s Note: Yeah, but to be honest, if they had to fight a ghost, it would probably be a TPK.]

[Editor’s note:  That’s fair.]

Back in town, Teiris, Silvanhost, and Gerrol return to the temple.  The Sister bustles up excitedly.  

“Did you get it?” she asks.

 “Yep…”

She jumps with glee.  “Thank you so much, have some red bull!”  She eyes them carefully.  “Have you ever considered Scien… I mean the Harpers…”

Next up:  All together now…

[ubersaur]

3, 6 14, 15, and 18 for both Lobster and Desiel?

3. Biggest regret?Lob: Staying away from home for so damned long (5 years). And for doing it for no good reason (felt like she had to have Done Something Worthwhile before coming home but rly she’s the only one who thought this lmao).Des: He’s kinda a mess right now. Prob regrets leaving home a bit at this point but at the same time he feels like he has done a lot to help people so far and he fully intends to keep doing so. But still if i had just stayed home i wouldn’t be in this mess at all

6. What’s their theme song? o god i dont knoowww

Lob:  of course this (srry its all i got for for her lmaoo) .... okok maybe a little Hopless Wanderer by Mumford and Sons Des: The Black Case from VOEZ OR All Saints Day by The Silent Comedy

14. Most heroic thing they have ever done?

Lob: this is hard cuz i have shit memory hhhhhh i’ll get back to u on that. O! Probably jumpin thru hellish drow shadow memory portals to rescue some missing folks which also involved charging past a dragon to get to and plant a smooch that guy she likes. Des: this dude has a lot less history tho so thats easier. He’s always trying to play hero in general both as a protection style fighter and an elf who is full of himself. But probably, so far, joining the resistance itself was the most heroic thing? Also (with the help of party!) rescuing a young girl outta the midst of A LOTTA BAD DUDES. 15. Most despicable thing they have ever done?Lob: she does a lotta low blows. Headbutts to the crotch and the like. One time she killed a dude with a wack to the butt. Des: Kinda lied to his brother on the phone and killed some people that were trying to kill him. NOT TO MENTION FRATERNIZING WITH LAWLESS FOLK?? (He think’s he’s a terrible person now and its tearing him up inside)18. Would they rather fight a hundred duck-sized horses, or one horse-sized duck?

Lob: absolutely a hundred duck-sized horses. She loves jumping from target to target.Des: 100% the horse-sized duck. He has already fought a large bird before + i dont think he could handle that many targets lmao

[creativerogues]

Queen Of The Spiders: The Greatest Adventure Of All Time...

Queen of the Spiders

Queen of the Spiders is a module published in 1986 and is a compilation of 7 related modules, often referred to as the "supermodule"!

Together, the seven adventures form an integrated campaign that begins in the World of Greyhawk, continues underground into the Underdark, and concludes in the Demonweb Pits, the abyssal lair of the demonic goddess Lolth.

What Is It About?

Giants have been raiding civilized lands in increasing numbers. The player characters have been called upon to combat the giants and to investigate the giants' reasons for invading and the strength of their forces.

The first module, Steading of the Hill Giant Chief, takes place in a gigantic wooden fort populated by hill giants and ogres. Here, the players uncover evidence of an alliance with other types of giants, as well as some mysterious letters from those behind the scenes.

In the second module, Glacial Rift of the Frost Giant Jarl, the action moves north to colder lands, where the setting is a system of caves clustered around a deep and narrow chasm in glacial ice. Here, the protagonists encounter frost giants, yeti and winter wolves, among other monsters.

The third module, Hall of the Fire Giant King, is set in a volcanic region where King Snurre has assembled a horde of fire giants, trolls and hell hounds. A secret passage from this module leads deep into the earth, where the adventurers discover the true nature of the force behind the raids – the drow in the service of Lolth, the demoness.

The fourth module, Descent into the Depths of the Earth, is on a larger scale than the others, with a map covering many kilometers of a deep underground region, later known as the Underdark. In the Underdark, there are many unique monsters previously unknown to surface adventurers, including the drow, which had been considered mythical. Troglodytes, jermlaine and svirfneblin (deep gnomes) made their first appearances in D&D literature in this module.

In the next module, Shrine of the Kuo-Toa, the adventurers explore a subterranean complex populated by the Kuo-toa, a race of fish-frog monsters in the service of the lobster goddess Blibdoolpoolp.

Players next make their way to the Vault of the Drow, a deep subterranean eldritch land in a huge cyst deep under the earth.

The adventure is completed with Queen of the Demonweb Pits. It takes place primarily in the eponymous Demonweb Pits, the 66th level of the Abyss.

Why Should I Use It?

Queen of the Spiders was ranked as the single greatest Dungeons & Dragons adventure of all time by Dungeon magazine, way back in 2004, and is probably still seen as the one of the greatest Dungeons & Dragons adventures of all time!

[noordzee]

Backlogged Inktober dump!

Wyn is a lobster merfolk paladin based on a leucistic moon goddess lobster I saw a little while back. I did wayyy too much work on this one but I’m so pleased with her ;u;

Erna is a tiefling fighter who is also a sailor. ...Yeah, I based her outfit off of Viking women’s dress... because of the horns... I know real vikings didn’t wear horns ok... She’s kind and great in a fight and has a penchant for swearing.

Rosalind is Mendl’s lab partner, a kobold who uses her druid powers to further her genetic research.

Gustaaf is a drow barbarian. He’s always lost in Deep Thoughts and usually uses improvised weapons like clubs because he’s always losing the previous one. I’d realized that I didn’t have any characters with beards up till now, so I resolved to give my next character one... don’t know how it looks on a drow, though :’D

–

This year for Inktober I’m rolling randomized D&D characters! I hope to one day DM a campaign with my friends, so I’m gathering some NPCs. Please, uh, don’t use them for your own games? original characters do not steel plz

[shonikado]

Warning: Contains "Shonikado Does Tabletop: Episode 6"

I waited all week for this, this was basically my experiment with doing D&D fights in a more engaging way (with mixed results, good feedback though)

First up, there's some stuff that the human barbarian went through that wasn't RP'd out, but instead I just sent the player the stuff that happened so we could get to the next session where another player would be joining in. Here's what that all was:

The barbarian and the frogs traveled onwards, reaching the mountain range between them and their destination. But a magic storm hit (those happen this time of year) and they took shelter in a cave to wait it out. She got bored waiting in the cave though and explored, and found a peaceful cult town full of blind cultists and bat-winged beholders. She didn't really care to find out what was going on, although the cultists were niced and offered her the opportunity to trade her standard eyesight for the ability to have a vague psychic sense of the whole continent. But standard eyesight is useful, so she declined

The storm passed and the party continued onwards, a day behind schedule, taking with them an old dwarf cultist who was meaning to go on a supply run later anyway. There was a tribe of orcs-and-miscellaneous that watched the group from afar but they didn't make any moves, they just scared the frogs a bit. But the mountains were left without issue, at which point the party ran into a giant who collects the toll to enter the city. They paid the toll, but the giant saw the merchant frog's amulet and was like "hey gimme that too" and it was reluctantly handed over. And then they went onwards

So then they arrived in the city, at which point the frogs and cultist departed and Ulyana went to the giant-hunters guild. There was a giant who seemed to be helping run the guild, which was confusing, and also he was a bit condescending. Anyway, Ulyana learned that the guild only accepts 100 members total and they're careful about who they pick, and the most convenient way to tell them "hey I'm a good pick" would be to win the Azure Tournament happening in a few days. So Ulyana was like "sure I'll go have fun fighting people to prove I can fight even more people" and went off.

OKAY SO THAT'S WHERE THE SESSION BEGINS

Started off introducing an elf monk, who used to be a sailor but got into boxing. He's very old. He wanted to enter the tournament so he was tasked to fight three little anima (my world's word for animated constructs, pretty much simple robots) and display his fighting prowess. He used flurry of blows or something to destroy them all in a single turn.

Later in the day, the barbarian applied, and smashed one with an axe and had her displacer beast destroy another, and then finally tore the last one apart. Which was maybe excessive but definitely displayed ability.

But since a lot of people had been applying to the tournament and they didn't want to overdo it on applicants, they were both asked if they'd be cool with partnering up, and ended up getting teamed up with each other. So a monk, a barbarian, and a displacer beast all show up to kick some butt

but first they were like "hey let's spar" which gave me an opportunity to do a silly joke regarding the arena I had prepared, and then I sat back and let two players basically drive things for me and get some character development going on. (The monk won because the barbarian forgot to rage and dodge and stuff at first and the monk is GOOD at damage-dealing.)

so at this point I introduced the system where they got double EXP for going into a fight without researching their opponents prior to the fight, the idea being "figure it out on the fly" is more challenging than "know what you're getting into". To start off, the monk went off to try and figure out who they'd be doing their tournament-entry-culling match against (there were too many applicants still so they were being pitted against each other to determine who the public-audience-getting fighters would be), and ended up finding a place where bets were being put on the fights. The person running the betting booth said it wouldn't be fair to divulge that sorta stuff to a fighter but offered to tell in exchange for a bit of gold. As it turns out, the monk is very cheap and immediately walked out of the roleplaying closet. (We went into the closet so the barbarian's player wouldn't know what went down.)

they needed 3 EXP blocks to reach level 4, 7 to reach level 5. Going in blind meant 2 blocks, going in prepared meant 1.

i gave them half a block for their spar since neither of them tried to actually kill the other

Anyway, having failed to research their opponents, they went in blind and encountered a bugbear who seemed dressed for much colder weather than was actually present, wielding a malicious-looking green longsword. The other creature was a new race they didn't learn the name of, that looked somewhere between a lobster, a cockroach, and a fish, with eight arms and totally decked out with weapons. The bugbear was super nice and said hi.

then they proceeded to curbstomp them both, meaning I never got to even show off the bugbear's special abilities and the other combatant just barely got to hint at what their moveset was

ALSO the bugbear looked at Ulyana weirdly but then decided it was probably nothing. That was before the fight. The bugbear was unconscious after the fight. So was the monk, which was fun!

Also, some extra stuff about the arena: there's some height-advantage parts of the arena, also you can only have as many potions as you have team members, also there's these clerics called the "angels" who are there to let you fight lethally because they prevent anyone from dying. The way it works is that they focus protective magic on people, and if they'd die, they instead go into a sort of near-dead state that it takes a few weeks to recover from. So they'd be out of the tournament, but not out of life in general.

anyway, the party won, the monk didn't die so he got to continue fighting (I basically explained the death rule to the barbarian in an effort to convince her to stabilize the monk since he made two death fails)

ANYWAY they went on to the next round, and the barbarian decided to investigate who the opponents were - she ended up interviewing drow twins who had been in the entry-to-actual-tournament fight against two dragonborns (the next opponents) and lost. They explained one was a paladin with healy stuff, and the other was a warlock with spooky spells. The barbarian nodded and half-understood and then left.

when they got to the arena the next day I introduced the fact that the grass in the arena has flowers planted in it to make mosaic ads, the first of which was "Rope! You Can Never Have Enough" which was a reference to a character I made for a campaign that never really happened, in which my char owned I think several miles worth of rope because we were given a lot of starting money and I didn't know what to spend it on.

anyway so the fight happened, the paladin proved to be ridiculously hard to kill, and also made it very hard to target the warlock because of two tiers of protective stuff going on. So the paladin got downed, then was revived by the warlock's potion, then the paladin was downed again and the warlock revived her with her own potion, and then she was downed a third time and the monk was very mad about the whole thing and curbstomped her face. Seeing defeat was already gonna happen, and not wanting her to get dead'd or himself to get curbstomped, the warlock surrendered and the party won.

also the warlock cast a spell that had a bunch of grabby tentacles that was supposed to do damage but when the drow twins were explaining it they were like "oh but it doesn't do damage it just grabs you" SO WHOOPS I FORGOT. WHOOPS. WHOOPS. I don't think it would have been more fun if it did do damage though, maybe just more frustrating

anyway the party was like yaaay we won and then they leveled up and it was too late to move on to the final 8 fighters (so 3 more fights, although the final fight is gonna be a bit weird) so the session was ended, more like paused but basically ended.

~DING~ SO WHAT WENT WRONG

missing happens a lot and it's frustrating for the players. Also I didn't really get to show off what made most of the fighters cool because they immediately got pummeled by the rush-and-deal-all-the-damage team.

My current ideas are this: since everyone begins at the same time, the first round of combat lacks any movement, and is just what you do IMMEDIATELY as the fight begins. This means my enemy characters can set up any fancy interesting fun fight-changing stuff that they've got (for instance, the warlock had a weird spell that would deal a lot of damage but required casting it/some prep time, and the paladin was gonna defend him while that happened, but then the party rushed up and immediately attacked so he was like "I'm getting out of here" which was not the best tactical decision maybe. There are things I could do differently.)

My second idea is that, if you miss, you can choose to automatically hit instead, but this invokes an opportunity attack. I don't know if the attack would happen before or after (so miss -> opportunity -> autohit, or miss -> autohit -> opportunity?) and this would just be a mechanic in the world. I think I'll consider it the "baiting" mechanic, like, you get the opponent to strike at you, giving you a chance to land your own hit.

Maybe I'll make it so the opponent can either opportunity attack, or take half damage. Maybe make it so that you can respond in one of the following ways: 1. Defensive. Take half damage. 2. Neutral. Opportunity attack, then take full damage. 3. Aggressive. Opportunity attack. Take half damage if you land the hit, get critted if you miss.

Both of these ideas are things that ANYBODY can use, player or enemy, making it fair but also making it easier for me to deliver on better experiences overall.

also I think I'm gonna inject a bit more roleplaying into the sessions. I was planning on skipping it to mostly experiment with combat, and it was mentioned this hurt things a bit - the fights were largely just "okay we're fighting these people now". I have ideas on how to make the fights more engaging on a narrative level (basically having the party MEET the other combatants, though learning what they can do is another story entirely and retains the EXP thing).

overall I think it was decent but I'm definitely glad it ended earlier than expected because that gives me time to refine what I have coming next.

[maxwellbloodfencer]

Tomb of Annihilation: The Game Plan

So, I’m preparing to run Tomb of Annihilation for a group of friends in the foreseeable future. The insane thing is it only took me about a day or two to read through the entire book and absorb all the improtant info. I remember back with Storm King’s Thunder I spent a week and a half reading through everything (though I never ended up running the adventure).

I’ve decided to start my group off at level 5, which is a thing the book recommends you can do. There are plenty good reasons for it. For one, it makes more sense to send a group of experienced adventurers on a dangerous jungle trek to fight the most powerfull lich in the multiverse. This also allows some of my repeat players to bring back characters they had to abandon in my earlier campaigns without starting them from scratch. One of my player’s actually lit up with enthusiasm when I told him he could bring back that ridiculous half-drow bard that used to drive me insane. Another important factor is time, both in-game and in the real life. In the adventure, the group has a time limit of about 80 days before their employer succumbs to the Death Curse. They travel around the map at generally one hex per day. Unless you are extremely generous with XP it is very hard to hit the recommended level and reach the tomb below Omu within that time, so I’d prefer starting the group off at a higher level. Lastly, as I have mentioned in my review, the book is a bit sparse on adventure locations aside from Omu. There are plenty of great scenarios to alleviate that on the DM’s Guild at this point, and they’ll release more. But not everyone has the spare money to buy a bunch of optional tie-ins from the guild, or the spare time to think of a couple dozen jungle-themed scenarios on their own. Starting at level 5 will give you the option to make the best out of the scenarios that are included in the book.

Speaking of the DM’s Guild, if I were to run the adventure with a group of characters at level 1 I would probably run A City on the Edge once they arrive at Port Nyanzaru. This is one of the Adventurer’s League scenario’s available on the DM’s Guild for a small price. Previously I was under the impression that the League scenarios were all very basic and maybe a bit boring. But the ones they released for ToA are really quite good. A City on the Edge contains 5 interconnected adventures designed to run for about one hour each. They all take part in the immediate area around Port Nyanzaru and are a great opportinuty to get the group framiliar with the city and gain a level or two before their first expedition into the jungle. The second scenario, Over the Edge, then actually gives your group some reasons to go out and explore the jungle as they are asked to scout potential places for new outposts, which I will definitely make use of.

Anyway, the current plan is to have the group arrive in Port Nyanzaru as the book intends and take a day or two to get familair with the place and hire a guide and maybe some pack animals for the expedition. Of course upon arrival I will welcome the players with “Welcome to the Jungle” by Guns’N’Roses to get them hyped. Then I want to send them up the River Soshenstar towards Camp Vengeance. On the way they can stop at Camp Righteous, which is completely abandoned but can lead to a fun encounter with a goblin tribe and also has this amazing puzzle involving piggyback rides. The book mentions that the DM might have to drop some hints for the players, but my people have an uncanny knack for solving the outlandish puzzles WotC puts in their adventures. They stumbled across every secret door in Castle Ravenloft by sheer dumb luck!

Sending the players towards Camp Vengeance should be easy enough. There is a NPC in Port Nyanzaru who wants to be taken there. The goblin encounter at Camp Righteous could at a neat complication if the goblins manage to kidnap the NPC. There is a goblin village nearby called “Yellyark”. It has a mechanism that catapults the entire village across the jungle! Finally at Camp Vengeance they will meet the frustrated leader of the Order fo the Gaunlet forces manning the camp. Having the NPC from the port with them will mean they can avoid being forced to work for the guy, but they still might want to help out around the place. From the camp the group can easily descend into the Aldani Basin and potentially run into some lobster people. Those guys look scary, but really they just want to be left alone. Plus there is the Heart of Ubtao, an earthmote floating above the basin.

Once the group gets comfortable with exploring the wilderness I will drop them into the Hidden Shrine of Tamoachan, which is an adventure remade for 5th edition and published in Tales from the Yawning Portal. It’s a really neat dungeon that fits well into the ToA campaign. It starts off with the group dropping through unstable ground into an underground complex filled with poison gas. They then have to try to get out of the complex, rather than the usual routine of entering through the front door and exploring downwards. It also has a nice selection of weird creatures that don’t feel out of place on Chult, but aren’t necessarily encountered else. But this is potentially their first time meeting a Flail Snail, and this one can talk! ToA already mentions a few creatures that are different from the norm by either being really powerfull, big or intelligent, so the flail snail is a great addition. I love it.

That’s it for the initial stuff I got planned. The group should get up to around level 7 or so with this, which means they can go explore Wyrmheart Mine or take care of the pirates in Jahaka Anchorage (or both) to get to the recommended level for their venture into Omu. I am quite excited for this!

[mehfashion]

The trash barge fallen into the sea

You've asked me what the lobster is standing there with his green leg? I reply, the form knows this. A trusting rain of alcoves. You, who is like a receptacle crab among the perching of many custodian. Everything skeleton with slender voices, the salt of the lake And piles of domestic bread among midnight. Coat of a wet hushed honeysuckle. I do not attack in the university of boneless vigil. Pockets of sand converted into gold, Nothing but your humble brow. You protect slowly into a city to flutter your business. This cold fragrance of strawberry and breathing guitar drows me With it's affluent rituals like tail and shoulder And ultraviolet jars like fingernails and shorelines, Everything boney with secure voices, the salt of the well And piles of honest bread in night. I could live alarm, clandenstine, and serection From kises and graces With a ultraviolet acrobat With serections in my eyeballs, Oxides of a difficult raft Setting in front of the city with a bitter car, Hidden as a bruised tiger. If you were not the nectarine the cosmic moon Cooks, sprinkling its peach across the city. The fleeting salt gave it tiredness. As if to entangle or develop or dismantle, Among yellow water and opaque san-dcolored phenomena. Like the hollow iron of guitars In the face of so many utensils to functionality Your root is a ribbon filled with negligent coral. Of delicate apple, spirit Of the goblets, Stole custodian blood, your kisses Gather into exile And a droplet of silk, with remnants of the sea. Swim on the coffins that wait for you Drop the fuming chairs, abhor the doors|i salute your irreducable peach And envy your humble pride