#loafbud rambles

[loafbud]

Honestly man i never asked to be here in life im just living every day life as the universe intended for me: no uni/school, no job, no car, no love life, just someone with autism , ADHD, and executive dysfunction who draws aimlessly, doesn't pursue their dreams, selfships, worships their comfort characters, & sleeps all day..

[loafbud-wc]

[headcanon]

the owner of scourge/tiny & his family had a son who was a super online, hardcore gamer who used a lot of gaming lingo/internet slang. scourge grew the closest to this person, so he started talking like him, even as scourge got older & founded bloodclan. so he definitely said something along the lines of "critical hit!!! ROFL get rekt LOSER, get SWEEEEPED!!" after knocking out all of tigerstar's lives in one hit.

[twstbud]

🪞 MY OTHER TWST BLOGS 🪞

At the moment, I have two (2) character-centric blogs relating to Twisted Wonderland. Sometimes, I'll reblog my art/writings/memes from those onto this blog, twstbud, which is my general blog to post my art/writings/memes about everything twst haha

@shroudbud — Idia Shroud blog! 💀

The majority of my energy goes in this one!! This one's my first twst blog. I have a good amount of drawings on it, but also a good chunk of it is just me either rambling about Idia or me struggling on his Mirror/Showcase pulls. I plan to do more headcanon/fanart posts in the meantime, and keep the Mirror/Showcase rants at a minimum!!

@vinyldraconia — Malleus Draconia blog! 🐉

I also love Malleus so I had to make a dedicated blog for him as well! This one's relatively new, and a bit underwhelming in terms of the amount of posts, but I plan on drawing him more + doing headcanons/writings!

(I guess I could've called it "draconiabud" to keep the "-bud" naming consistent LMAO)

And of course, my main blog: @loafbud, which is pretty self-explanatory. It's my main, so I just post OC/multi-fandom art, music, writings, and whatever's on my mind.

[shroudbud]

UUUHH HELLO- HEY

WELCOME TO MY SIDEBLOG WHERE I CAN TALK ABOUT IDIA SHROUD WITHOUT SPAMMING SO MUCH MY MAIN BLOG

MAIN BLOG IS @loafbud BTW

aside from me reblogging some of my idia drawings from main, i'll also reblog others' art/creations + ramble dump & talk about my headcanons/AUs n all that here

WOOHOO LETS GOOOO

[loafbud]

i opened up tomodachi life overnight after several months and decided to add new miis so i first added shigaraki and then saved + deleted all former miis to have their relations reset. tell me why immediately after i purged them all, my mii was curious about shigaraki just moving in and literally seconds later shigaraki asked to be my mii’s friend! 😭

they became friends super fast LOL!!?! i can think of 2 scenarios: either both were confused about why all the miis disappeared one by one, or shigaraki used Decay on all of them

[loafbud]

I have this flash drive that I’ve held onto that I vividly remembered self-destructing while I was watching E3 2018 + taking screenshots, I was like NO WTFFF MY FILES BRO 😭😭😭 All those drawings, animated wips, and unfinished projects are gone

But SOMETHING IN ME told me to hold onto it…

Ever several months I’d plug it in the laptop and it would freeze of the Windows file explorer FOREVER only to not recognized. Not even the drive’s storage space would show (it’d always show as empty).

I’d change the drive letter, tried the command promt stuff, anything I knew I was able to do…

…fast forward to 2024 (yesterday, specifically LOL)

And BY SOME MIRACLE, I managed to find a way for it to AT LEAST load and show the storage space??? 😭 I tried uninstalling the usb drive, restart the laptop, reinstall, and it MAID PROGRESS??? And the farthest I could go was open the drive itself and see the main directory of folders… So that means all the files (or the data, at least) are still THERE!!

However, it still freezes file explorer and, when it unfreezes after 20+ minutes of waiting, I’d get like an I/O error message or something?? Then it was telling me to plug in the drive, even though it’s already in

So I don’t have access to my files on that drive YET… but I havent given up, and Im so glad I never tossed the thing years ago

[loafbud]

I have a Splatfest prediction(s):

- for popularity, team love wins votes (this part aint a prediction, its facts lol!!! literally everyone i see is on team love)

- popularity may go like this: love ≈80%, money ≈20%, fame ≈9% (i dont feel like doing math, just pretend those equal to 100% i know it doesnt 💀)

- if that's the case..... team love, i hope y'all prepared for endless mirror matches/tricolors 😭😭😭

- this energy is really giving me nessie vs aliens vs bigfoot splatfest vibes....... (where aliens was the most popular/everyone believed would win- which they were- but that came at the cost of mirror matches and bigfoot only having 8% votes, so rly it was nessie vs aliens but nessie took all the clout— this may just feel like money vs love again haha)

All these are my personal predictions— I'll reblog this whenever the fest starts or results come out!!! 👀

[loafbud]

maybe i should look into getting a therapist this year, i never had one

[loafbud]

That was beautiful.

Grand Festival was peak. ABSOLUTE PEAK! 🗣️🔥🔥🔥

As someone who was on Team Future, I would celebrate any team regardless who one. Seeing Team Past winning got me emotional (in a good way)... it's almost like the results were paying homage to Splatoon 1, and the Squid Sisters, to where it all started. The star in the sky. The Calamari Inkantation to this series that I grew up with ever since Splatoon's debut in the E3 2015 trailer.

I'll forever follow and cherish this series... 9 years and forever more. 🥹💕

In terms of the Splatfest results, our team getting zero points feels poetic. I see the number "zero" as the start of everything, the number of nothing, the number that can become something, the infinite, the endless — it resembles the future in a way. Endless, infinite! It's a mentality I need to practice more, to be honest: Zero can be mean many things, but it can also mean the beginning of things; 'nothing' will eventually become 'something'. I've never been more excited to be on a losing team and I'm saying that with my heart on my sleeve.

All of the results for each team feel poetic to me!

But seriously... thank you Splatoon 3! Content updates may have ended, but they did say they'll have special splatfests/past big run/eggstra reruns until then.

All in all, what an absolute blast I had these past few days during Grandfest. The performances, the atmosphere, the new music?? And seeing everyone else posting about their own experiences, it genuinely felt like an event we all went to in-person, we all got to experience that as a community. 🥹

Man, I love Splatoon.

[loafbud]

I've been imagining the physical appearance comparison of domesticated Doopadoos VS wild Doopadoos, and I can't help but see their differences being similar to bunnies VS hares

[loafbud]

i wish tumblr still let us do our own personal year in reviews with our blogs :(

[loafbud]

Something I feel that kind of helps with managing my discomfort/anger when I'm dealing with my reactions of hearing a misophonia trigger:

If I can still hear ANY ounce of my triggers while im playing noise through my headphones...... I 'change the station'

For example, if I hear it while I'm playing Balanced Noise (via the iphone Background Sounds feature), I switch it to the Dark Noise option.

Most of the time I also have noise playing while I have a no commentary, no in-game voicing gameplay in the background (again, no vocals because that's where my triggers come from)... and the station-change thing applies to this as well: hear a trigger irl? change the video!

This helps with me because if I change my noise, then I'm not reminded of the misophonia trigger I just heard. Vice versa, if I kept the same noise and/or video playing, I'd only feel my reaction seething in my chest until, eventually, I'd have to retreat and isolate to cry it out or blast music in my headphones to do what I call a 'soundwash' — rinsing away the gunk out of my brain.

[loafbud]

Thank yall for sticking around

I know it's like,, thanksgiving is tomorrow and it's like "give thanks" but i'm serious when i say id say this any other time

I may say the stupidest shit or drop a self-deprecating post out of nowhere, or get extra vent-y and say dumb stuff that I regret (I do in fact love kittens and do not hate them, it's just I never been around one before— but admittedly they are a bit too energetic for someone as sedentary as me & I did allow it to overstimulate me... Life is a learning experience)

....But aside from that annoying "woe is me" side of me that i'm allowing myself to be more mindful of (I accept that none of this process will be a smooth, linear route— i'm gonna have ups and downs throughout, but hopefully catch myself more and more right before the moments I fall)

...And aside from the stresses of life in general, I'm genuinely glad to have yall here. 🥹 Like...... A few years ago I was actually very hesitant on opening Asks because I was nervous with interacting w/ people, but i'm glad I did decide to open them. I've always been too online so aside from my family, the internet is pretty much the only type of social interaction I have atm— and when I feel like sharing whatever, let it be art or just my thoughts, tumblr is usually the first place I go to share that. There's other social media, but Tumblr is the only place that doesn't make me feel drained or not good enough.

From the questions, to the convos, to the users and anons... thank you!!

[loafbud]

the more i put my mind to it, i realize that i DO have enough materials to actualize my goals (to make an indie game, start my webcomic, etc).......... the only thing thats an obstacle right now....... IS MY BRAIN. the chemicals in my brain just won't.. WORK when it comes to starting/finishing stuff?????

i cannot for the life of me gather the drive or motivation to either start, make progress, OR finish through with any personal project. i've had passion projects i started OVER A DECADE ago and i still haven't started on anything big with them

it's hard to explain— like??? i WANNA do it, i constantly daydream about a world where these projects are real, but i mentally cannot start because im like "if i start on anything, even if its big, i gotta finish it in one sitting (even if it's impossible)... OR ELSE!!!"

(the whole "just do it!" "if you don't start it, it'll never be finished!" "think about WHY you started this project/what inspired you" motivation doesn't work for me in this situation ASDFGGJJK-)

[loafbud]

Okay so a hurricane just came thru yesterday afternoon

It was Francine— thankfully it moved fast so it was out of here by a couple hours ago

We were on the west side of it so impacts were minimal for us – it was like your average Gulf coast summer storm: hurried rain, breeze with occasional gust (yet surprisingly no thunder/lightning)

Aaaand the power is out 😵‍💫 It went out before earlier yesterday, like a quick power nap, then came back on, only to turn back off again. It did this like,, 5-7 hours ago so i'm just sitting here in the dark rn

We're all safe tho!! Where we live, we're used to hurricanes and storm outages so we're almost always prepared, even unintentionally.

I just hope the hurricane didn't do a lot of damage elsewhere

[loafbud]

Why do I have to wait to feel deserving of my wants and needs to be met? Why do I have to wait to live the life I've always wanted? Why do I have to wait?

Why not sooner?