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eisforeidolon · 5 years

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Episode: Atomic Monsters

I watched this at least a week ago, but just didn't get around to rewriting my notes into a post 'til now. I did actually find this the best episode so far, but lets be real, that's such a low bar to clear at this point it says basically nothing.

The opening sequence is really fun! I found the whole thing genuinely enjoyable, both the action itself and that it included exactly the kind of return cameo I can actually get behind. No retcons or resurrections that make death somehow even cheaper or ruin the original finish to the character's story! Not even to mention that, instead of existing just for the sheer fanservice of it? A sequence like this is actively improved by giving us a familiar face we have investment in to keep it from being all just random unfamiliar cannon fodder getting offed.

Unfortunately, this isn't the rousing endorsement it could be when we know that both expanding to a big action sequence and bringing Benny back for it were actually Jensen's ideas. Not even to mention that the thing which really works best in the episode? It's the dream sequence that's not actually connected to anything else and doesn't have to worry about continuity to work. This is my surprised face.

I enjoyed the exchange between Sam and Dean in the kitchen. The meat man conversation over the bacon was rather silly, but in a fun way. I've seen some people reading things into it (it's insulting Dean doesn't know the slang, Sam is randomly vegetarian now) that I didn't really see there. I did appreciate how Sam was weirdly jumpy and had trouble meeting Dean's eyes after the creepy alternate world dream. I thought it worked really well for both slice-of-life and Sam’s reaction.

In terms of the Winchester's case, well, for the most part it could have been worse. I don't honestly believe even if I hadn't been spoiled that I wouldn't have immediately suspected the parents from their introductory exchange about how Billy playing in the big game was more important than a cheerleader's death. I think it was supposed to be a retroactive subtle clue, but it was more of a clue-by-four. So the “mystery” of tracking down the monster was pretty lost on me. I did like that the one girl having braces was a clue! But I also thought the scene with her rehearsing her speech on a live mic in an empty auditorium was weird and contrived. I straight out cannot forgive that a girl was literally abducted from the school campus and NOBODY checked the security footage near her car fucking IMMEDIATELY well before Sam & Dean. C'mon. Then, of course, a couple random middle-aged suburbanite humans get the drop on Sam and Dean, because Dabbernatural really just loves to make them incompetent so plots happen.

Then the big reveal and blah blah blah, kid accidentally ate his girlfriend. WHAT WERE WE SUPPOSED TO DO??? Um, maybe try not being scumbags? Idiotic scumbags at that, abducting a second girl from their son's own school instead of somebody that wouldn't be missed or even, hey, maybe encouraging him to try harder not to eat people. Don't try to sell me on this pseudo hallmark 'but they just love him so much' bullshit. At least the kid has more self-awareness and conscience than his fuckwad parents.

Then we get to the infuriating character assassination part of the programme. Having Sam and Dean say that they'd do the same thing as the dad for Jack their “son”? Fuck you very much, show. I could maybe, maybe, see Sam or Dean kidnapping and draining the life out of an innocent to save the other at their most desperate worst. Though I think the only time they even really get close to that kind of an actively, knowingly evil choice is with Doc Benton. Not only do I not buy for a second that they would do that for the totally-really-their-actual-child-for-reasons albatross Dabbernatural has shoehorned into their lives? Struggling to do the right thing even when it hurts used to actually mean something – it was always a very important qualifier that while Sam or Dean might make that choice, the other would not let them. So having them both agree this kind of straight up villainy would be a-okay for oh-so-totally-loveable-no-really-woobie-blob Jack ...

Like carelessly assassinating every human in the BMoL headquarters, it fundamentally fails to understand what it is that keeps Sam and Dean from being the monsters. Hint: it's not just that the show centers around them. “We do the ugly thing so that people can live happy” - these moronic hacks seem to be actually trying to parallel Sam and Dean saving innocent victims and the world to human monsters that were going to selfishly help their son eat his way through the entire goddamn cheerleading squad. Am I getting this wrong somehow? Is there some other, less appalling, reading here that I'm missing? This whole scene honestly made me nauseous.

They talkity-talk on for a while longer, but it's really not much better. Sam declaring that God was totally done with them was the writers putting those words in his mouth based on nothing. At it’s very best, it was Sam’s bad habit of convincing himself conclusions he’s come to are true because he wants them to be. So them both just deciding to believe it's true after Chuck has admitted to orchestrating their entire lives … I'm not sure if we should conclude the Winchesters have brain damage or if that's just the writers. Especially when the underlying reason for it is nothing more compelling than , “Watch the Winchesters see-saw on the angst fulcrum completely at random! Yay!” If this was actually well written, there would be some precipitating reason for Sam to suddenly be the one being all fatalistic while Dean is accepting. Instead, the writers just slap some coin-flipped angst angst angst on the page and meander on in a supposedly forward direction.

So then there's the other half of the episode, the Becky storyline. Am I the only one a little disturbed that Becky's first reaction to seeing Chuck was to look scared and try to run away? Like, they're exes and all, sure, but she doesn't know any of the god stuff yet – I think the only thing she even says about their breakup is that Chuck dumped her. Is that reaction supposed to be yet another bit of “new canon” showing how Chuck was just that terrible all along? But then she does let him in, so maybe we're just supposed to take it as Becky still having a tendency towards dramatics? I honestly don't know, but it was weird to me.

I do genuinely love that they had Becky go to therapy and realize just how absolutely fucked up what she'd done was and ultimately sort herself out to become someone who seems to be a well-balanced adult. A well balanced adult that didn't have to give up being a fan for that! Seriously, kudos to the writers for this, because 7.08 is such a loathsome episode that otherwise ruins Becky as a character. Though I do have to nitpick a bit – while I get that they wanted to put SPN merch in Becky's home as a callout to her still being a superfan? In the show's universe, Chuck's books were never that popular, so I'm having some suspension of disbelief issues that there would be Funkos for them. We could pretend they were customs, but she's got at least one Impala, so even that doesn't quite work. I'm not entirely sure who “people only want them sitting around doing laundry anyway” is a dig at, but I'm giving it the side eye.

I also am not entirely sure what to make of Chuck's whole no one needs me I kinda hate me I'm all lost and don't know what to doooooo shtick. Is this a game he's playing? Is he really that wishy-washy? Did some of Dabb's sad internal monologue as showrunner somehow end up in a script by accident?

He goes on like that and laments he's lost the Winchester's trust and had words with them or whatever, and then he zaps Becky and her family away at the end. Like, if he cared enough about Becky to care about her opinion, why does he turn on her, too, just like that? I guess we're supposed to see it as him having found his mojo in her space and vanishing her because taking over her space that's working for him currently is his latest whim. I suppose they're intending to show Chuck as just being that capricious and flighty, but I don't know that it works for me. The way they've been writing him he's acting so randomly and impulsively that it's kind of unbelievable he can even sit still at a keyboard long enough to write another Sam and Dean installment. Again, I definitely find it unbelievable that the Chuck they're giving us now would be capable of playing the long game that he would have had to for him to be actively behind everything. Until he suddenly got impatient and lazy and popped up in the cemetery at the end of the last finale ... for reasons … and is now just … like that … because.

Not to mention that his powers are, big shock, just as arbitrary as everyone else's in the current show. He can't actually see what is happening to Sam and Dean because of the bullet sapping his power or whatever, but we're supposed to be worried about the ominous ending he's writing for them because … he's got those god powers to make it happen, I guess? Uh...

I will grant that the ominous bobbing of Sam and Dean Funkos' heads to Chuck's furious typing was a wonderfully foreboding shot to end on.

#negativity for ts #long post #anti dabb #anti jack kline #writer incompetence #spn season 15 #spn 15x04

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anselm0 · 5 years

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Novelization of Star Trek: The Motion Picture

I knew this was going to be Something, and it sure is.

I’m not the first to remark on it, but that sure is a gay pride flag on the cover of this book/movie. A quick google reveals that the pride flag debuted in 1978, while TMP was released 1979, which by no means proves intent, but those are facts of general interest I’m going to share here.

Two things:

LOVE INSTRUCTOR???? Her FIRST, no less??? what

Why am I being subjected to Roddenberry’s writing exercise of reviewing his own tv show while in character of one of the characters on said show

One actual thing that we learn from Kirk’s preface is that there are apparently two varieties of humans, the original flavor and then the super cool Crystal Pepsi humans who are wicked smart and pretty insufferable about it. Also not in Crystal Pepsi humans’ favor is that they SUCK at space travel because they can’t “help but be seduced eventually by the higher philosophies, aspirations, and consciousness levels” they encounter in aliens and doing a bunch of disappearances, defections, and mutinies as a result. So the moral of the story is we need humans too stupid or stubborn to want to be better to drive the space planes, I guess.

I also find this amusing. The editor’s note on this line from “Kirk” is that he’s being modest, because he did a great five year deep space mission. ~~Kirk begs to differ, though:

I also liked TOS, imaginary editor, but 94 deaths in five years of peaceful exploration is not an amazing statistic. Anyway, Kirk’s annoyed at how he and his five year mission got portrayed by the guy they sent to record it, what does that asshole have to say for himself?

what. is. happening.

Look. I am all for world-building. But this is ridiculous. What kind of false modesty self-dragging self-insert Bolshevism

We are, by the way, only 11 pages in, and the story hasn’t even started officially. This will be the longest long post.

Chapter One opens with Kirk getting a semi-telepathic message from Starfleet that is the opening scene of TMP in which the space cloud zaps some Klingon ships.

Yeah, I can see where the public concern over this policy would come from, imaginary editor. It is bananas, and I hope consigned to a quiet ‘canon? never heard of her’ retcon. Imagine if this were still the case when the Borg came. Who could have guessed that having technological access to the brains of all the top brass in the Federation’s first and only major defense force might be, like, a bad idea!!!!!

It’s also a POINTLESS idea, because after getting the message, Kirk goes to a signal station to call Starfleet because he can’t reply (a design flaw) and also he’s not sure what he’s supposed to do with this information because he didn’t get any instructions (why send classified info to people who don’t need to act on it???), and they just show the same scene to him again when he’s there.

Before that happens, however, Kirk gets put on hold long enough to think thoughts and feel feelings he “had not permitted himself to admit” to himself. Like all former greats, he hates his desk job. He took it for reasons, despite this amazingly persuasive case against doing so:

We get it, you’re a Real Man.

Literally the entire medical profession apparently agreed with McCoy that a desk job would be bad for Kirk, but Starfleet wanted him to be their posterchild of awesomeness for all those frickin’ Crystal Pepsi humans wondering if Starfleet is even necessary (why they would care about low intellectual ability Kirk is a mystery left unaddressed), so they made sure Kirk was persuaded to accept against medical advice.

The way they did this was a combination of his sense of duty and a sexy lady. Of course. Sexy lady (Vice Admiral Lori Ciani, spelled Ciana in all subsequent mentions) is in fact the one Kirk gets connected to once Starfleet takes him off hold. Lori always gets his blood pumping, what with her “unusually large eyes and the slim, youthful angularity in her arms and legs” that “always reminded [Kirk] of a fawn’s wild grace and innocence”, even though he knows she’s actually a freak in the sheets. Oh, and she’s also smart and a great officer or whatever, her lips caress his name whenever she says it, he can almost smell “her body fragrance” and Kirk’s getting hard.

I wish I was exaggerating.

There are a number of concerning things here that I think McCoy should turn his attention to instead of whether Kirk can survive at a desk job. Are relationships one year contracts in the future? That seems like a bad idea.

Kirk has a paranoid fantasy that Admiral Nogura manipulated Lori Ciana into contracting sex/mothering/friendship with him and is pretty sure that Nogura told her to talk to him now to make sure he does what Starfleet wants again.

I’m tired already.

It is not clear to me if she acts like he expects her to if his paranoid fantasy was real. In any case, the conspiracy theory and THIS ENTIRE CHAPTER was all for nothing because Kirk just goes to Nogura’s office and convinces him to give him command of the Enterprise.

On a more pleasant note, there was a chapter in the middle of all Kirk’s nonsense of Spock’s POV. He’s at Gol trying to achieve Kolinahr and he gets distracted by what seems to be the space cloud momentarily linking his and Kirk’s minds. Spock is shook and “knew in this instant that the human half of him was far from extinguished. That half had simply been capable of human guile and had learned to hide itself even from his own notice. He had foolishly and carelessly underestimated it and believed it to be gone. But like the enemy it had always been, his human half had merely lain in wait in order to assault him while he was defenseless.”

MY POOR BB

Anyway, Kirk’s on his way to the Enterprise and once again thinking thoughts.

I’m going to guess that Kirk is not a great boyfriend.

There are several things going on here, none of them good or pleasing.

There are some really uncomfortable descriptors for Sulu and Uhura, which are unnecessary in addition to being offensive because we all know what they look like. We know Sulu is Asian, so you don’t have to call him “the Asian romantic,” or really modify any descriptor of him to remind us that he’s Asian. Uhura initially has “classically lovely features,” which is okay, I guess, but then she has a “fine-boned Bantu face.” Um.

There are some weird descriptors of Will Decker, too, who Kirk is coming to demote and summarily replace, but the worst one is this one, Scotty’s perspective on Kirk pulling Decker aside to tell him he’s being demoted:

My face is a rictus of horror.

The description of the transporter accident is quite gruesome and Good. We all know the fate of the unfortunate Commander Sonak, but Roddenberry now reveals that the second person was sexy lady trap Lori Ciana!! Kirk inexplicably took over the transporter controls to try to save them her, but isn’t familiar with their new configuration, and is guilt-stricken by the uncertainty that their deaths might have been prevented by someone like Decker, who really knows the new Enterprise. Also, nobody knows why she was there.

FUCK YOU

I’ve been very negative so far. The novelization actually does a lot better than the movie does in conveying Kirk’s disorientation with the new ship and how much he’s second-guessing his fitness for command, despite his insistence before that he was the only one who could do this. On the other hand, he doesn’t realize that he should PUT DECKER BACK IN COMMAND.

Oh, he makes Decker the science officer in addition to the executive officer because he won’t accept a different science officer in replacement of Sonak who isn’t Vulcan. Apparently there’s no replacement for a Vulcan science officer. . . . He immediately begins worrying that he’s overloading Decker with responsibilities. JUST MAKE BETTER CHOICES INSTEAD OF WORRYING ABOUT BAD ONES.

Hey, you know that dumb scene in TMP where all the crew gets together in an empty room to once again watch the Klingon ships get destroyed and since it’s a rehash, everybody spends it wondering why Starfleet has like eighteen different uniform designs in unflattering cuts and colors? Roddenberry knows we all think it’s dumb and has some strong words in response:

lol

Apparently that room is the “rec deck,” which is the largest interior space in a starship ever designed. Some people think it’s wasteful but real space veterans know that the rec deck is where “the most vital of the ship’s mechanisms [are] kept in peak operating efficiency through music, song, games, debate, exercise, competition, friendship, romance, [and] sex.” There were definitely regular public orgies on the five year mission, weren’t there.

Thirty-one people bail after seeing the Klingon ships bite it, which seems like a thing that they shouldn’t be able to do?? Also, what was the point of all that secrecy with the secret implant for telepathic transmission of classified information if Kirk’s just going to show it to several hundred people who are free to leave if they want to?????

I know TMP gets shit for being The Motionless Picture, but you really have to read the novelization to grasp the complete lack of plot points. It’s EIGHTY pages before Lieutenant Ilia arrives. The book is 250 pages long.

Uhura has some kind of Tone when she tells the bridge that Ilia is Deltan and Kirk rebukes her, “And there are no finer navigators in Starfleet, Commander.”

This is a weird species whose major defining features are overwhelming sexual pheromones and a GREAT sense of direction.

Kirk immediately regrets chastising Uhura since she’s “the last one who needed instruction in diversity from him.” IS THE FUTURE RACIST OR NOT, GENE

Sulu seems not to know what a Deltan is, even though all the other TOS officers do, so I don’t know how that happened. I got my hopes up for ONE SECOND when he didn’t seem to care but he is affected by her allure after all. Stand down, gays.

Kirk clocks the obvious clues that Ilia and Decker were involved before, and starts finding ways to make it his business.

Sure, Jan.

Anyway, the ship leaves the orbital dock in a looooong and boring chapter, then spends another chapter flying past Jupiter at IMPULSE. Thank Jupiter and Zeus we did not have to sit through the slow ride from hell through the solar system.

Some random things we learn in the meantime (a lot of meantime!!):

McCoy is a hippie who dislikes surgery and medicine, preferring to just berate people into healing themselves or whatever. I now see why starships would need ship’s counselors but there would be absolutely no Xanax or beta-blockers for the Reg Barclays of the future.

There are body scanners incorporated into all the new uniforms, which constantly transmit biodata to the medical bay. This was always a part of the costume design (it’s in those super ugly belt buckles!) but never mentioned or actually used to my recollection in TMP. It’s also not a thing in future Trek series, presumably because it would be boring to not have medical emergencies.

Chapel went on the five-year mission with a PhD and now has her MD! GIVE HER SOMETHING TO DO

McCoy resigned from Starfleet because Admiral Nogura would not heed his medical opinion that Kirk is a Manly Man who needs to be doing Manly Things out in space instead of working a desk job.

Immediately after this reveal, Roddenberry reinforces how scientific it is by having Chapel say, “deprivation of [starship command] produced physical and emotional symptoms remarkably like those associated with narcotic withdrawal.” Okay!!

We only refer to Ilia as “the Deltan navigator” now.

“The so-called mutant-farm civilizations of pre-history had known [humans aren’t alone in the universe] of course, but their information had been a gift and not the result of human labor and growth.” W H A T

What do these words mean

FEELS racist??? idk idk

also this:

What a piece of information to just casually drop with no followup whatsoever!

Roddenberry is basically masturbating himself and Kirk about how great it is that he’s back. Having Kirk command the Enterprise again is

“like Lazarus stepping out into the sunlight” plz

so spiritually moving that Decker is suddenly feeling fine about being inexplicably demoted (couldn’t Kirk have just been an admiral still? and Decker a captain?) and removed from command

By the way, Kirk apparently didn’t officially take command until moments before they left orbital dock, which feels wrong to me?? There were eleven hours where he was giving all the orders but had no official jurisdiction or responsibility for the consequences. Starfleet needs better command protocol.

making Sulu, Uhura, and Chekov ecstatically happy, a fact that Kirk somehow knows from looking at their faces despite not seeing any of them in years and having done nothing but demand the ship be launched before being properly tested or configured for warp and against the advice of his first officer and chief engineer omg you idiot

Kirk then orders them to go to warp agains the advice of his first officer and chief engineer, accidentally creating a wormhole the ship falls into along with an asteroid that nearly destroys them because Kirk doesn’t know how the phasers work on his new ship. Kirk then gets shirty with Decker when Decker factually states that Kirk doesn’t know what he’s doing and Decker does, and knowing things was useful in that it saved the ship being blown up by a series of stupid choices. GREAT FIRST DAY

Again, I do think the book is doing a good job of conveying Kirk’s motivation of scrambling to relive his glory days and his willful blindness to the consequences, but I don’t know how we’re going to get to a point where we’re actually happy this guy gets to be in command of a starship for another five movies. McCoy does call him out on his nonsense, but I don’t see him learning or growing at all yet and can’t foresee it from what I know of what plot is coming next.

Speaking of plot developments

SPOCK!!!

First of all, “severe black robe” is underselling one of the best looks ever served to my undeserving eyes. Second, no sooner has Spock stepped back on the bridge than everyone starts dropping serious hints about his relationship with Kirk. I mean

subtle!!

Spock is not a happy bunny, though. Everyone is happy to see him again - it’s been so long and Scotty’s so excited he apparently forgets that you don’t touch Vulcans? - but Spock’s ignoring them. As soon as he can, he finds a place to meditate.

Roddenberry wants to make absolutely sure we know that the Enterprise is a nonstop fuckfest. Consider me informed!

Spock needs to meditate because he was way too excited to see Kirk again. He’s pretty whatever about everyone else (”humanly human” McCoy and Chapel “with her bizarre and impossible fantasies of one day pleasuring him” ick) but his t’hy’la is a different story. I MEAN!!!!

He has to go to a meeting with Kirk and McCoy (who’s now monitoring Kirk’s behavior re: his unfitness for command) and we get this little gem about the officer’s lounge:

I know it’s supposed to be a utopia but come on.

WINK

They’ve established there’s some kind of intelligence in the space cloud that Spock can telepathically link with when the first probe arrives and injures Chekov. Chapel comes to treat him but she can’t do anything for him. Ilia does...something vaguely telepathic that usually happens during Deltan sex to make him feel pleasure instead of pain and you know what, I’m going to choose to not read into this. It does seem weird that Starfleet has extremely strict regulations about allowing Deltans to serve due to their pheromones but telepathy is A-okay.

We learn during the probe’s visit that the only console hooked into the ship’s main computer and Starfleet databases is the science station’s, which seems pretty unbelievable. There isn’t even an uplink for centralized record keeping about course changes and phaser discharges?

Ilia disappears and Kirk is surprised how much he cares. They did meet just today but SHE IS YOUR CRACK NAVIGATOR why wouldn’t you be upset! Her replacement comes up as they’re getting pulled into the space cloud and she’s also good; Kirk thinks, “There might be something about her worth remembering.” I’m concerned that Roddenberry doesn’t seem to realize how unlikeable he’s making Kirk.

See the entire sequence where the Ilia probe arrives:

Gross.

Kirk does spend a lot of time thinking that Deltan pheromones don’t affect Vulcans and that Spock is annoyingly unmoved, but that’s just guys being dudes.

Probe Ilia remembers Decker, so Kirk tells him to use that to try to establish productive communication with Vger. I know it’s spelled Vejur but that’s dumb. It’s Vger. V’ger if you’re nasty. Anyway, Kirk was making this traumatic assignment about him and his awesome sexual prowess.

But he’s not done!! How could this sequence possibly end WITHOUT Kirk creeping on his first officer trying to fuck an alien probe!!!!

It’s completely normal! Look, Decker even expects it!

Decker is Manfully frustrated that his Manliness isn’t working on the probe. Kirk and McCoy are armchair quarterbacking this like the fans of weird sexual encounters they are. Chapel comes in to make a good suggestion and McCoy condescends to her, of course. There’s some worldbuilding around Deltan sexuality which seems to be just that there are psychic connections involved that make regular, non-psychic sex boring for humans afterward. Okay? I thought it was going to be something much weirder. Again, I don’t know why THIS makes Deltans have to take celibacy oaths to be in Starfleet but non-sexual telepathic actions are totally fine.

This is all going on while the Enterprise is in the cloud, so they take a break from creeping on Decker and the Ilia probe to go to the bridge and have Kirk condescend to Uhura about how to do her job. Look, I don’t want to get into a whole thing about Kirk’s virtues as a commander but he is not better at Uhura’s job than she is. PLEASE give her something to do other than be impressed with Kirk.

Around page 209 (out of 250) we finally get a chapter from V’ger’s POV and it is legitimately Good. If Gene Roddenberry was capable of writing science fiction without obsessing over future sexuality, this book would be so much better.

There are fewer than 40 pages left by the time we get to the iconic sickbay scene.

This book is so weirdly paced. If you’re going to write about future sex, please let it be between the characters we actually care about!! For example!!!!!! But no, we get Decker and Ilia-probe, which may actually be Ilia’s psyche in a mechanical casing? Unclear, but Decker is pretty convinced.

Gross.

The rest of it is basically exactly the same as the movie: they get to V’ger and figure out it’s Voyager and respond with the correct code, but V’ger refuses to acknowledge it. Decker and Ilia somehow become noncorporeal entities joined with V’ger. It’s not clear how this is possible, but whatever. Kirk is, like, mildly regretful about the absolute shitshow this mission turned into and the fact that he lost two good officers to a space cloud, but he’s not torn up about it. He got his ship back! And he has no fear that it will be taken away again because he caused half the shitshow! In true Star Trek fashion, there is literally ZERO discussion of where V’ger, who is a perambulating cloud as wide across as a small solar system, is going to go now instead of Earth bc that’s a somebody else problem.

The end.

#star trek TOS #star trek tmp

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l4t3rzh4t3rz · 8 years

Text

LONG INFO ABOUT LATULA UNDER THE CUT.

Partially written by Jelly, aka @canterintuitive

Partially ommitted information for anything not pertinent and/or private info

Artistic Catgirl: Fucky was probably the first person who has ever seen her have an anxiety attack Artistic Catgirl: Feeling like she can't breathe with overwhelming thoughts Artistic Catgirl: Shaking and holding herself Artistic Catgirl: But she forgot she invited Mituna over Artistic Catgirl: And he just sees that Artistic Catgirl: And she doesn't even know he's there Jellyfish: but he reached out--brushed his hand over her cheek--chirping, purring, making all those Soothing Buggy Troll Sounds Jellyfish: but if she needs one, the first thing he does is scoop her up into a hug Artistic Catgirl: She slowly calmed down as he did that, still shaking Artistic Catgirl: Just saying Artistic Catgirl: "I-I'm not the cool girl you thought I was... It's all a lie I'm sorry" Artistic Catgirl: Just apologizing cause she's too frazzled to say much else Jellyfish: he's kinda quiet for a sec--got her head tucked into the crook of his neck, cheek smushed against the top of her head. Snug-ass Hug.

"... Um? Nope?? Still cool. The fuckin' coolest most tubular troll this side of the galaxy."

He's not much of a comforter, but he kinda copies what Kurloz does to calm him down--takes her hands in his--makes those little I promise I'm not gonna let anything hurt you chirping noises again--and helps her stand up when she can

"You're the coolest person I know, LT. Like ... really, really rad."

And he felt in that moment, my friends, the red-quadrant heart-flutterin' sort of amorousness that trolls refer to as 'pity'. Artistic Catgirl: She calms down as he says that, her eyes widening when she realizes he really means it. She realizes that he sees her at her worst and still thinks she's amazing

And in that moment she knows that no matter what, she wants to stay by his side and just holds onto him tightly. his She doesn't want to let go, even if he sees her as weak.

"... Tuna, I can't believe you think that... I..."

Artistic Catgirl: But after they've been in (SGrub) for so long, and start to feel like they'll never escape, they just have a long conversation Artistic Catgirl: Talking about back home and stuff Artistic Catgirl: And one of them asks what their fav thing about being in the game was Artistic Catgirl: And Latula is just like 'okay gurl you can do this' Artistic Catgirl: "It's you." Jellyfish: mituna's soul leaves his goddamn body

"Oh."

Fuck, what's he do. He's not smooth--like, he and kurloz talk about how suave and badass and nook-magnety they are, but holy crap what's he do

"I think you're really fuckin' tubular!'

Nailed it. Artistic Catgirl: She laughs and just slowly moves to put her hand over his. She makes her movements obvious so he knows what she's doing. She knows he doesn't like to be touched out of no where. She's blushing a bit.

"Do you think... Maybe the quadable kind of tubular?" Jellyfish: Without hesitation, he slips his hands into hers and holds it.

"Yeah!"

Never has the golden-boy looked so yellow in the face--nor grinned so wide.

The apocalypse is a lot less shitty with her in it. Artistic Catgirl: She closes her eyes and just leans forward. Her lips are slightly puckered. She only leans forward oh so much, waiting for him to meet her so that it doesn't seem like she just sprung a kiss on him Jellyfish: He was about to do that yawn-and-reacharound-hold trick, but holy moly, this is way better.

He lifts off his wraparound shades, and leans in to kiss her.

ZAP.

"OHFUCsorry, shit--"

He sparked. Literal fireworks when she kissed him. Artistic Catgirl: She quickly pulls away when she gets zapped, but then just laughs.

"I ghost guess sparks really do fly when two people kiss! Pretty fucking rad right?" She gives his hand a gentle squeeze. "I pity you so damn much Tuna, ever since that day you saw me at my worst and didn't walk away." Jellyfish: He can't help it--though it's still kinda repressed, he does a lil flap--hands curled into happy, tense claws as he rocked in place--scooted up to smooch her temple again--it make her hair float like she'd just touched a plasma ball.

"Ditto, LT. Ditto."

He's not good with words--he's more an actions guy.

Jellyfish: also, an idea Artistic Catgirl: I love ideas Jellyfish: post-accident Jellyfish: fucky couldn't pronounce her name Jellyfish: 'L4N7L4'

'L4N7U0L'

'L3N71L57H'

'7LUL0L4' Jellyfish: and finally Jellyfish: '7UL1P' Artistic Catgirl: "Ok4y b4b3 th4t's good."

Jellyfish: latula probably saw the explosion Artistic Catgirl: She's laying in a pool of her own blood after dying by the hands of her denizen Artistic Catgirl: Probably Artistic Catgirl: She cried so damn hard and held onto his body tightly Artistic Catgirl: Refusing to let go until she was pulled off of it Artistic Catgirl: She didn't care what anyone though anymore. Her tunafish was dead Artistic Catgirl: Refusing to believe it

Jellyfish: imagine they meet in the dreambubbles Artistic Catgirl: Another reason why she ended up fighting her denizen Jellyfish: its the ultimate videogame Jellyfish: maybe she promises herself she has to win it for her player two Artistic Catgirl: Exactly Artistic Catgirl: For her tunafish Jellyfish: imagine when they meet in the dreambubbles again Jellyfish: he's probably been there a while--doesn't even know hes dead Artistic Catgirl: She would still be in a pool of her own blood Artistic Catgirl: Not yet waking up Artistic Catgirl: Kind of in that in between stage where she's transitioning from Skaia to the bubbles Artistic Catgirl: And Mituna wanders to where she is and the bubble changes to her land Artistic Catgirl: And he keeps getting closer and closer to where she is. Artistic Catgirl: Until he sees her covered in her own blood Jellyfish: Mituna, of course, can't process it.

He panics--fumbles to find her--shakes her, tries to lift her--screams for help.

All that comes out is garbled babbling. Artistic Catgirl: Her eyes slowly open, still yellow and having that slightly teal tint, on the cusp of adulthood. Artistic Catgirl: "Tuna... Is that you...? How?" Jellyfish: Mituna's hair falls out of his eyes.

One empty black socket, burnt to a crisp, and one ghostly white. A spiderwebbing of scars trail down both cheeks as he cups her face--but his hands are clumsy, and rough, and his voice is strangled when he speaks.

"Lanhtnula!" Artistic Catgirl: He can see the amount of heartbreak in her eyes as she gently cups his cheek in return. She gets a little bit of her blood on his cheek.

"Tuna, your eyes... You're so hurt..." Then it hits her. "... I thought you were dead." She teared up heavily. "I thought I was never gonna see you again!" The tears freely flow. Jellyfish: He fumbles, and smoothes back her hair--tears dribbling down on the side of his intact eye.

"Non--nohnhnhnhnononoyerhhurt, yerhurdt--"

He's calling for help again--lifting her up to his chest, and immediately falling over in a flurry of cursewords. He can't balance both of their weights. Artistic Catgirl: "Tuna I'm fine..." Her eyes widen when she realizes she doesn't actually feel any pain. "Tuna I... I'm not in any pain... But I should be. What happened?" She's so confused and scared. She hasn't had time to come to terms with her own death yet. Jellyfish: He freezes where he is, hair flopped down in front of his eyes--they're not sparking anymore. Hi horns don't fizzle when he panics--everything is flat, and the shock when he touches her is gone. Light static, at most--but barely tangible.

"Y... yaore bleendihn." Artistic Catgirl: "Tuna... Where are we? I don't know what's going on..." She tightly clutches his shirt. Her breath gets shallow as an attack comes on. She starts to stutter. "D-Did did did I-I-I-I-" Jellyfish: He doesn't know either. He doesn't understand what's happening, or where he is, or where his friends are--but Latula is here, and the only thing his brain can think to do as it basically bluescreens is ...

To curl up over her. Drape over her like a shield, tucking her close.

I mean, there's no danger--kind of a silly move--but he held her nonetheless. Artistic Catgirl: She holds onto him tightly, finally getting it out as she started to shake. "A-a-are we d-d-dead?" She starts hyperventilating, her eyes slowly turning white as she began to understand how he was there with her. And she doesn't get how. There's nothing after death. Jellyfish: "Idunno, I danno, Idndnao, I dudnontknwoIdontoknondhgasgggjkfkjglskfdkjfkjghgjfj!"

He finally managed to pull her upright--burying his face in her hair, scratching the bases of her horns--calm, calm, do the calm things.

Except he can't. Every time he tries to purr and trill for her, all that comes out is an awful kazoo-cricket shriek.

He doesn't know what's happening. Artistic Catgirl: She holds onto him tightly as she waits for the attack to pass. After a few minutes she finally calmed down, pulling away. "Tuna, I... I thought when O faced her that that would be it... That I would die but here you are... The saddest most tubular guy in the universe..." She buries her face in his shoulder. "I missed you. I pity you so damn much... I don't wanna loose you again..."

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