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rachelbethhines · 4 years ago

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Tangled Salt Marathon - The Lost Treasure of Herz Der Sonne

So now we get to what is, in my opinion, the best episode in season three. However, it’s still season three, so that’s damning with faint praise.

Summary: Rapunzel tasks the kingdom with refurbishing the throne room. While breaking down a wall, they find a map to the Lost Treasure of Herz Der Sonne and Rapunzel decides to set up a race to the location. The teams, which consist of twos, are only allowed to look at the map briefly before the start of the race. However, Rapunzel's partner, Feldspar, brings a copy of the map with him and he warns her that the treasure is cursed.

Why Are You Just Getting to This Now?

It’s literally been months since you defeated the Saporians. Edmund had to have time to travel all this way to Corona and you’ve rebuilt an entire village since then. We’re talking at bare minimum three months or more.

Who just leaves a gapping hole inside their home for three months? Where did you conduct the government’s important business during that time? Is there any other structural damage to the castle or the town outside from previous battles that you’ve just left unattended? I understand that rebuilding Old Corona is important but those villagers have been evacuated and living elsewhere for a year and a half now since Queen for a Day. It wasn’t a priority, but this is.

Also this episode has to come after The Return of the King and Who’s Afraid of the Big Bad Wolf because Red, Angry, and Hamuel exist. It can’t just be slotted in somewhere else in order for it to make more sense. The writers genuinely planned for Rapunzel to be this disorganized and didn’t think to give a logical reason as to why.

Also Why Are You Conscripting Regular Citizens Instead of Hiring Professional Contractors?

Unlike Old Corona, which is a full on community that would require multiple building projects going on simultaneously and therefore could use volunteers, this is a single government building. It’s Rapunzel’s job as leader to make sure that that building is kept maintained and up to code. It’s her responsibility not the regular average citizen’s who has their own jobs to do and zero experience with construction.

Rapunzel is literally forcing these people to be slave labor for her under the pretense of ‘community’. She’s taking their time away from their own busy lives, forcing them to work a dangerous job, and not compensating them for that time, effort, and risk. And no, they’re not just volunteers at this point; because as acting queen, no one can safely say no to her nor can they just leave even when they’re clearly annoyed and fed up at having to do the work.

Lastly they’re untrained. They lack the skills and tools to this job. You need an architect, you need a safety inspector, you need actual carpenters and masonries ... maybe even an interior decorator... The point is you need trained professionals and part of being an administrator is using government funding to hire these people in order to make sure the work gets done safely and efficiently and create jobs and keep money circulating through the economy.

Rapunzel may not mean any harm. She might just be oblivious and untrained herself. But this is terrible leadership and the show never points that out. It never has her learn how to be a better a ruler so by the end of the series you don't feel she’s earned that title of Queen and you fear for the kingdom’s continued existence.

So Why Is This Here?

Why would there be a Saporian map to a king of Corona’s tomb hidden in the wall? What’s the story behind this?

Yes we know his wife was Saporian, but that doesn’t explain anything. Why would she need a map on the wall to her own husband’s resting place; assuming he didn’t out live her himself. Why would said map be carved into the wall of Corona’s castle and not written on a scroll? Why is it in Saporian when they don't speak that language in Corona?

Like I could come up with explanations and create this whole backstory for Herz Der Sonne and the first Saporian/Coronian War, but at this point I’d just be doing the work of the writers for them. They’re the ones who introduced this lore and had it inform plot points and character motivation; and then failed to explain any of it to the audience and adequately have it all connect back together in a way that makes sense.

The Moment When You Realize This Whole Episode Exists Because Zachary Levi Enjoys Doing an Ed Wynn Impersonation

Ok time to explain some behind the scenes Info.

This is Ed Wynn.

As you can tell from the gif above, he’s famous for voicing the Mad Hatter in Disney’s Alice in Wonderland. He’s also done a whole bunch of other stuff and was well known even before working with Disney, but the Mad Hatter is his most well remembered role today.

Many actors, particularly voice actors, like to do impressions of him because he has such a distinctive voice. Including Eugene’s VA, Zachery Levi.

Now I don’t know if the character of Feldspar was created specifically because the creators were inspired by Zachery Levi’s impression, or if they had this character already planned out and just casted him in the role since he could do it and it’d save them money. Either scenario is plausible and not unheard of in animation. But the long and short of it is, as a shoemaker, Feldspar is intended to be a parody of the Mad Hatter. That is why the character exists.

Now as I said, this isn’t unusual for animated tv shows. Quite often you get main cast members to voice secondary and/or one off characters because it’s convenient, efficient, and doable when working with audio recordings. Also quite often voice actors will do impressions of other famous people to flesh out these background characters. It’s also not out of left field for these secondary characters to get an episode of focus if they’ve been around for awhile and keep popping up in the story.

What is unusual, however, is to focus on said character in the final season when there are a bunch of other more important characters with unresolved arcs that need the screen time more. It’s an incredibly odd decision to highlight Feldspar here when we still got Varian readjusting back into society, Red and Angry settling into their new home, and Edmund running around off screen. And while some of these character feature in the episode, they’re just there for the jokes not for any development.

What’s a “Sap Pond” and How Does That Even Work?

Ok its a fantasy world, I get it. But the franchise does try to have a distinction between the magical and the mundane. Or at least pretends to try and have a distinction. There’s to my knowledge no such thing as a ‘sap pond’, and if such a thing does exist I doubt it’s an actual deep pit full of tree sap as shown here.

If you want characters to still be surprised by out of the ordinary occurrences and have the supernatural world be separate from the regular world; then you need to have the mundane world grounded in our known reality. Nature needs to function as real world nature would. If something exists in your world that doesn't in ours, then you need to either explain it or have the characters responded appropriately to it.

But You’re a Prince Now?

Look, I’ll buy that season one Eugene didn’t have unlimited access to the royal treasury as he and Rapunzel were still new to their roles and their relationship. But it’s been over two years since the movie ended.

Since then Eugene and Rapunzel have lived together, shared finances together, and currently are co-acting rulers of the kingdom. He’s also a bonified prince in of itself on top of being practically married to princess/queen.

Yeah I said it. Part of what makes season three so frustrating is that Rapunzel and Eugene are functionally married at this point, they just haven’t gone through the ceremony yet, and there’s no stated reason for why they keep dragging things out.

This is why we get out of place jokes like this that no longer reflect who Eugene is now as a person and feel like they belong back in season one or the even the movie itself.

I can understand if he wanted to join in the competition because it’s fun, but he’s not poor. Neither he nor Rapunzel needs the treasure. I’m not sure even Lance needs it because as Eugene’s best friend/adopted brother he’s piratically nobility at this point as well.

Royalty and the rich are not and never will be underdogs show. Stop trying to make them such.

So Why Feldspar Again?

This is such a half assed plot point.

Remember Rapunzel literally pulled out a book earlier to translate the map. Xavier not only knows the legends about the Saporians, but also keeps a book of magic lying around, and the Saporians are the only human people who have functioning magic in the show as part of their culture. Varian spent a year living and working with the Saporian leader, and knows how to decipher ancient scrolls written in dead languages. And said Saporians, are being currently held in the dungeons of the castle.

But you’re telling me that only a random cobbler can read the warning clearly written on the map?

They give some bullshit reason as to why Feldspar knows Sapoprian but it doesn’t matter. It’s a forced and contrived excuse to get the character involved in a plot he has no business being in. The story fails to justify the use him over the other more prominent characters who have closer ties to this particular subplot.

And We’re Suppose to Believe That Herz Der Sonne Was a Good Guy?

Why would a benevolent king who supposedly brought peace to a warring land have a doomsday curse involving zombies? Why would said king be enshrined a tomb that’s not native to his culture? What even is the treasure and why be buried with it?

There’s clearly more going on here regarding Corona’s past and the treatment of the Saporians as a people in their own right, but the show never does anything with it. Why introduce these complexities and world building if you’re not going to tell a story with them? Why have the Saporian subplot at all in a series already over stuffed with villains if you aren’t going to have them challenge your protagonist and have her grow into a more mature person?

I’m not dunking on the series for being ambitious nor for having flavor text to help flesh out the world, but it so aggravating that there’s no follow through on the show’s set ups and narrative promises. If you’re not going to give the needed focus to something then just don’t put it in. Cause once it’s aired you’re committed to it and the audience is going to hold you to account.

I haven’t seen plot mismanagement this bad since the 80s; back when cartoons had to battle network syndication, episode commissions instead of contracted seasons, and could be canceled at any time without prior notice. Now there’s still plenty of bad practices going on in the industry, especially as the move to streaming messes with things, but Tangled does not have the same excuses as say Johnny Quest, Dungeons and Dragons, or even Gargoyles did.

How Do You Even Know That Would Work, Rapunzel?

No seriously, how does Rapunzel know that putting the treasure chest back on the pedestal will stop the cruse? That hasn’t been established yet by any known source of information. Heck no one knew what the curse actually entailed until it was activated. Except for Xavier who oh so conveniently didn’t say anything until the last moment. If anyone should have the knowledge to on how to end the curse it’s him. But nope we gotta make the Rapunzel the infallible hero who is always right for no logical reason.

I don’t know how to explain this to you show, but perfect is boring. No one wants a flawless protagonist who can do it all 24/7 without any help whatsoever. And it becomes down right annoying to watch a hero who is clearly flawed still put upon a narrative pedestal as if they weren’t.

So Why is Varian Suddenly Useless In This Fight?

This entire climax is about showcasing the ‘power of teamwork’ by having the characters use their various skills sets and work together to defeat the enemy.

Except for Varian.

He’s treated at best as a spectator to the unfolding events and at worst as a damsel in distress.

Varian. You know the guy who is the series most competent and threating antagonist. Who brought an entire kingdom to it’s knees, twice. The only other character besides Rapunzel herself who could and does hold his own against other major antagonists, including super powered ones.

If this was just a one off incident, I’d just shrug it away as him being a glass cannon; insanely overpowered when well prepared but easily out of his depth when not. But that’s not what’s happening here.

Season three constantly nerfs Varian’s abilities, same as they did back in The Alchemist Returns, and there’s three reasons for this.

The first is to try and stop him from overshadowing Rapunzel and Cassandra. The writers don’t want to give him any more story focus for fear of him being more popular the the two girls. Which is a ridiculous and petty reason to write a character OOC but there you go.

The second is the on going issue of making Rapunzel needlessly the center of any and all solutions to every problem regardless of her level of involvement in the initial conflict. Yes, it’s her show, but she’s still not the whole world. Other people exist outside of her and it’s not fair to anybody when the writers ignore that simple fact.

Last is the writers sacrificing established character for a joke. And as already pointed out, even in this very review, Varian’s not the only character to fall victim to this. It’s just bad writing. Yeah the joke might be funny in the moment but you run the risk of jarring you’re audience’s immersion. In a series like Tangled where you’re constantly asking the audience to suspend their disbelief, humor needs to be firmly rooted in the characters natural behaviors and must evolve to match any character development.

Why not just have Varian throw a chimball or two, run out cause he wasn’t planning on fighting anybody that day, and then have the other characters rescue him? It’s not that hard to work in a joke while still being respectful of the characters.

So What Does Anybody Learn From This Episode?

Yeah the other characters learn some vague lesson on teamwork and getting along or something, but they’re not the focus of the episode. What do Rapunzel and Feldspar learn?

Unlike some people I don’t mind Feldspar’s existence. When’s he’s kept as a background character he works. In fact he’s one of the few townspeople who do work as intended, because he’s representative of the everyday citizen who’s often on the outside looking in on these fantastical events and therefore gives insight into what’s going on and the populous’ opinions on things without being a major player in anything.

That's fine, needed even, and I don’t mind him getting a single focus episode to gain a greater insight into how this world works or even flesh out his character more, but that’s not what we got. Feldspar doesn’t grow as a character because of this episode. I, as the viewer watching, learn nothing about him nor his life that I didn’t already know. This resolution with him resolves nothing cause it’s a ending for a conflict that was never established beforehand.

In fact what even was the main conflict of the story? Rapunzel being annoyed by Feldspar? Ok and..? Did she need to learn not to be annoyed by him? Was that a thing that needed to be addressed? Hasn’t Rapunzel already put up with annoying people before now? Was was this deficiency of character actually solved by this one interaction? Has she learned to be more appreciative, attentive, or open minded of others?

If you tell me it’s Rapunzel’s show then I expect Rapunzel to actually learn shit!

I expect the external conflicts to tie back into her interpersonal conflicts. If the external conflict does not do that than there better well be a another character who gets that focus instead without her hogging the limelight.

This Dynamic Adds Nothing

They set up this friendship with Varian and Xavier and it doesn't go anywhere. It never comes back into play and we never see them interacting on screen together again. It also undermines a future plot point that’s coming up later.

More over it doesn’t further either of their characters.

Xavier is still an extraneous exposition fairy. Turning his flat characterization into a one note joke does not erase that fact. Giving him a kid to tell stories to doesn’t explain his place in the narrative or give him purpose to the story. We still don’t know why he has these connections to magic nor how he knows all the this lore, and he doesn’t push the plot forward.

Meanwhile Varian maybe lonely but that doesn’t mean he needs yet another mentor figure in his life. We already have his father, who we barely see him interact with since coming back, and all his other ‘friends’ are way older then him already as well. Rapunzel’s the closest in age to him and she is constantly condescending to, well everybody, as she pretends to be more mature than she actually is. There’s no one in the story who Varian is on equal footing with, and no Angry and Red don't count as they’re far younger than him.

I don’t know what this series has against teenagers but it showcases some very unhealthy depictions of them; ether by constantly infantilizing them, traumatizing them while subjecting them to parentification, or just flat out ignoring their existence all together.

Teenagers exist and they need to be treated as teenagers. I don’t know how to put it more simply than that. Teens aren’t children. Teens aren’t adults. They’re teens. And when writing for them you need to understand that difference and acknowledge that they have a completely different phycological development and placement within society to anybody else. That’s why the category of adolescence exists separately from childhood and adulthood in the first place.

So to tie things back to the first point. The concept of Xavier and Varian having a friendship is not a problem. But as with so many things on this show, it’s the surrounding context and lack of follow through where the issues arises.

Varian needs a friend his age, who is his equal, more so than a mentor; if indeed Xavier is even intended to serve that function as he doesn’t do any real mentoring. This should have been an opportunity to bring Faith in and establish her better. In fact it’s reasons like this why she should have been a bigger character all along but we’ll get more into that as we get to her only ‘focus’ episode.

Conclusion

It’s fun seeing all the various character interactions and unique team ups. Also the humor does work. The jokes do land even if they do bulldoze through established canon. Plus seeing Rapunzel actually annoyed by shit going on around her is always entertaining as it humanizes her. If watched in isolation from the rest of season three, this is an enjoyable episode. But that’s it’s core problem. I shouldn’t have to find filler to keep me going in the last leg of the show.

This was pretty short comparatively speaking with the rest of the ones I have to write for S3, but longer ones are going to come out more slowly just due to real life and time. As always though you’re support is helpful in keeping going, and if you feel like you can donate to my Ko-fi and leave a tip there.

https://ko-fi.com/rachelbethhines

#tangled #tangled the series #rapunzel's tangled adventure #rapunzel #varian #anti-tangled #feldspar

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taechaos · 3 years ago

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Idea series oc sneaking Tae in the house after he had big fight with his father about something (your choice if it's smutty or fluff or angsty) with a peek of a vurberable Tae? Honestly i think he would change the topic as soon as he started it and prob with sex.

Anyway I'm really interest in their family dynamic since I remember don't know if it was in part one or two that you mention they have really religious parents? And seeing how harsh their dad is with Taehyung it have me wondering how is his relationship with the mother and ocs with both parents, despite everything the seem really distant from their kids, maybe thats why Tae and YN find comfort in each other. OC is the first real bond Tae made with someone so maybe that's the reason of his fear of being replaced and his obsession with her, and ocs mother probably don't pay that much attention to her so that's why even after the incident she still want him to be there. At this point I'm just rambling I'm sorry. And this ask is all over the place, started with a request and ended questioning characters life 💀💀. Sorry hehe.

when i read this yesterday i was literally blown away by this like hOLY shit your analysis is so in-depth at first i was like damn do my characters have more than oNE DIMENSION?? WHICH IS RLY FLATTERING BUT I THINK ITS JUST UR WORDS THAT MADE ME SOUND SMART 💀💀💀 the ending is chef's kiss tho made me bust a lung SHFJJD thank you so much for taking the time to write this its honestly so fucking amazing. hopefully u can see more of their family dynamic in this drabble :)

Rays of sunlight slither through the cracks in the blinds of the living room, allowing Taehyung's father enough light to scan the newspaper he holds in his hand, with the musical, happy chirping of mockingbirds filling in the silence. All of these beautiful signs of nature and peaceful rotation of the earth makes Taehyung tense up even more.

The moment he got back home from buying drugs, his father greeted him in monotone with a, "would you sit with me for a moment?" and he hasn't spoken since. The zipperbag in his pocket crinkles every time he shifts in his seat, making him cringe momentarily before he starts nervously fidgeting again.

This is so awkward and yet equivalent to hearing: we need to talk. God, why is he so silent?

Clearing his throat, Taehyung stands just as his father flips a page with a lick of his thumb. "I'm going to my room really quick."

"No."

"Oh." When will his step-mother return? She's his only hope as he sits down while avoiding looking at his father, whose gaze is set on the black and white printed pages.

It's only a minute later when he talks without diverting his gaze.

"Your sister is in her room, researching her major to get a headstart on a typical syllabus."

"Smart," he comments with disinterest and nibbles on his upper lip.

"Taehyung, how was your attendance in college?" he folds the newspaper and curiously peeks at his son, who is doing a poor job at hiding his nerves.

"It was alright–"

"Lying is a sin, son," his movements are aristocratic when he leans his chin on his fist. "Don't lie."

"I'm not," he stammers and his eyes flicker, "it was bad at the beginning of the year, but I fixed it."

His father pinches the bridge of nose where his frames lie. "I love your sister, Taehyung," he sighs and takes off his glasses, "I want her to do well. I've given up on you, but her? She can accomplish great things if you're not there to influence her. You're a bad influence. Are you following me?"

Taehyung nods dumbly with a racing heart before registering his words and shaking his head. "What?" he blurts. "I used to help her with her homework all the time–"

"You were home once every month."

"Just because you didn't see me doesn't mean I didn't see her," he coldly says. That's not entirely accurate, but it is true that he saw you more than he saw his parents before he started living here again. For you.

His father is taken aback, offended as he scoffs, "You avoided me and your mother, and yet have the face to stay in our home?" He stands up and passes the coffee table that was Taehyung's only barrier to hover over him with distance. "I expected so much more from you, but you can't even do the bare minimum. An adult without a stable job, respectable girlfriend, and embarrassing grades. I'm ashamed to have raised such a boy, for I can't even call you a man."

Taehyung abruptly stands but he continues, "If you can't even pay rent, go back to that landfill you came from."

"I have to pay rent to live with my family?" He's livid and his hands shake by his sides; they're taking you away from him because what? He isn't the son they wanted him to be?

"You've made it clear that the only thing keeping you here is my daughter," he blindly points at the closed door of your room, "and you will have to try much harder to see her again. Get your life together, and you can come back."

Taehyung's face is heated with anger from the injustice. "What the fuck?! This is such bullshit; you're kicking me out?"

His father frowns at his language, growling, "Taehyung! I will not let you drag her down that path with you. When you stop destroying everything you touch, I'll gladly let you live here."

Destroy? He hasn't done any harm to anyone—especially not you. He knows he's self-destructive, but it doesn't extend to his environment. If he fails, it's his failure, but his father takes it personally instead of encouraging him to do better.

The importance of reputation and success in this family enrages him; he's aware that he's not much of an affectionate person either, but a little love wouldn't hurt to witness in the household.

Instead of defending himself or speaking his mind, he obliges bitterly.

"You need to get laid," are his last words before he slams the door and opens the zipper bag to pop a pill. Ecstasy isn't so fun when you're not around, but he can use the distraction. It's been a bad day.

He flips off a stray cat idling around the garden before casually leaving the property.

—————

Studying isn't fun for you, never has been, never will be. Though you hate every second of it, it does give you something to do to make time pass faster. You've been tutoring yourself about things you'll learn sooner or later anyway, but you guess it doesn't hurt to have to study less when the time comes.

You check the time. It's approaching night at 9 PM, and your father wouldn't protest against a break now, hopefully. He only suggested that you should start studying, but you know what his suggestions really mean.

Do it, or get shamed into doing it with subtle glances.

As if that isn't enough, he constantly checked up on you throughout the day. He wasn't exactly giving you a choice, which irks you.

But that's done and over with, and there's a more pressing matter at hand: where is Taehyung? You heard bits and pieces of the argument, but you couldn't get the whole scoop. You worry he's going to go back to his old habits of never being here, rarely seeing you. He would've been hanging out with you six hours ago out of routine... It can't just be you being clingy. Something happened.

You: are you coming home tonight?

The response takes a few minutes.

taehyung: nop

taehyung: but i am coming to ur room

taehyung: cuz ik u cant sleep without me 😖

You: actually the opposite but ok lol

You: when are you coming

taehyung: whenever u want uwu

You: uwu...?

You: just come before it gets too late

—————

So that was a lie. It's 1 AM and still no word from Taehyung. Okay, maybe you're just being clingy now, but it's unlike him not to be clingy. Maybe he wanted to cool off for a long time after his tak with your step-dad, or simply wanted to hang out with his friends after spending all of his time with you.

That makes sense. What doesn't is the slide of your window and shuffling of your curtains. You instantly sit up in your bed and clutch your blanket closer. You watch a silhouette enter your room as you pick up your limp, your tense muscles relaxing only when you recognize the intruder. You put down the lamp with a click of your tongue, ignoring the relief in your pounding heart.

"Hey," he stupidly grins at you. He looks disheveled, clothes untucked and wrinkled, and from the little light you have, you can see his redshot eyes.

"There's also the door," you remark sassily. "Are you um... high?"

He shrugs and crawls in your bed, dismissive as usual. You both make an effort to keep your voices quiet.

"I talked to mom earlier," you ease into the discussion until he butts in.

"That's great."

You roll your eyes and prop an elbow to look down at him. His head lies on his hands while staring at you, mood strangely upbeat. He's definitely high.

"She was a little sad about something, and I know it involves you. I heard you talking to–" You're interrupted with a lingering peck, a little rough in its force but not unwelcomed.

"I've missed kissing you. Shouldn't you be asleep, by the way?"

Recovering from the unexpected attack, you reply, "It's not that late. I don't have to wake up early."

"You shouldn't ruin your sleep schedule," he tucks a hair strand behind your ear without taking his eyes off of you. "Staying up is hard to stop once you start."

"Yeah, you're a great example," you joke with a quiet giggle. Whispering with him feels intimate in a heart fluttering way. His heart pangs with a feeling he can't put a finger on. "You didn't answer my question."

"Hm?"

"Don't play dumb, I'm really curious. What happened with dad?"

"A lot of things happen with dad," he shrugs, "sometimes we play catch–"

"Taehyung," you give him a pointed look, and he giggles.

"You're right, he'd never play catch with me." He groans as he stretches in your bed before trapping you with his arms on either side of you in one motion. You don't know what he's trying to do, but you watch him above you in amusement. "No offence, but when is your mom not sad when my dad is around?" he laughs with a huff.

"That's rude, Tae," you remark seriously, "she's happy when you're around."

Taehyung's smile falters like yours, his happy guise crumbling when he says, "Are you?"

"Pfft," you roll your eyes, "What do you think? I was up waiting for you."

Ah. That's not a very good influence.

"I'm here now," he whispers, "go to sleep. It's okay, I won't do anything, I know you worked hard today."

You agree with a yawn and nod. But even in your sleepy state, you can read the room—Taehyung is especially attentive of his tone and volume aside from being so tense. "Are you alright?"

"I'm in and on ecstasy," he falls back on his former spot, "I can't not be alright."

"Taehyung, I haven't seen you all day–"

"Yeah, because I didn't want to be here," he looks at you dead in the eye, "and I don't want you to be here."

You blink rapidly, slightly shaking your head in confusion, "What are you saying?"

"Move in with me."

He's met with cold silence, so he persuades persistently, "Don't you want to get away from here? You'll have so much more freedom with me, and I can help you with your assignments and everything. It'll be perfect."

"I— do you... Where?" Taehyung is high and he doesn't know what he's saying is what you believe because this is so out of the blue, so irrational, but he describes it like it's utopia; you are not completely against the idea.

"I have enough money from drug dealing to rent an apartment, and you can tell dad that you want to move out to be like an adult or whatever, that you have a stable job, without mentioning me," he rambles, and his dilated pupils are more noticeable up close; it slightly puts you off.

"Wh-what about mom?"

He scoffs, "If she wants out, she can get her second divorce. Don't worry about them; after all, they're apparently the only real adults here," he relates back to not being worthy of being called a man. You shift away from him little by little. "Just trust me."

The phrase is triggering for you, a reminder of the time you were tricked into trusting him moments before your trauma. "We'll talk about this when you're sober," you meekly say, avoiding eye contact.

A wicked smile grows on his face, "I can't wait, princess."

#idea tae #*cue big time rush theme*#just gotta say this one last time #the analysis was so well written #its honestly a sight for sore eyes 😫

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insanelycooljk · 4 years ago

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Jared gets kicked out?

send me the title of one of my deh wips and I’ll share an excerpt/tell you a bit about it

Oh boy... I hope you’re prepared for some angst lmao. In terms of just, the amount of angst/hurt, this is probably the worst wip I’ve got (...except maybe the one that’s just titled ⚡⚡⚡ lol 👀). This is another one that I’m not sure I’ll ever actually write, but it was like 2am and my brain just went hey...what if?? and I had enough to say about it that it warranted it’s own word doc lol.

Anyway, the title pretty much says it all with this one.

Also just wanted to clarify that I can’t actually imagine Jared’s parents ever kicking him out. Like, they’re clearly friends with Heidi and I like to think that anyone Heidi is friends with must be pretty decent people. But, for angst purposes... yeah they’re not great in this. On that note, trigger warning for shitty homophobic parents and homelessness.

So Jared knew coming out wasn’t going to go well, but he didn’t expect it to go quite this badly

He tells his dad first and it’s definitely not great, but it’s not a complete disaster either. His dad kind of just says “Well, you know what I think about that.” and Jared says “I know.” And that’s just the end of the conversation really. And sure Jared’s still hurt by it, but also that was exactly how he expected it to go, so it’s not like he ever had his hopes up enough to be disappointed.

“Are you going to tell your mother?” Jared knows he probably shouldn’t, but part of him just wants to get it over and done with already. I mean really, it’s not like he’s ever tried to be subtle, his mum should probably know already just based off of some of the things Jared’s said over the years, but she’s probably in denial.

So Jared just thinks fuck it. She doesn’t have to like it but he’s sick of pretending.

Which ends up being a very bad decision. As expected she takes it very poorly. There’s a lot of yelling and it’s awful and she’s saying all the standard homophobic bullshit, and then she starts talking about kicking Jared out.

And Jared’s just in shock because... she can’t be serious. Like, this isn’t happening. She’s just angry, she doesn’t actually mean it. Right?

Wrong. Turns out she is absolutely serious. And Jared is just looking at his dad desperately because he hasn’t said a word this whole time, but he still says nothing.

Jared is just so scared and angry and hurt and in shock. Part of him wants to throw a tantrum and just kick and scream and refuse to leave unless his parents physically drag him out of the house.

But he’s in too much of a state of shock to really say or do anything. His dad helps him pack some things and tells Jared that his mum just needs some time to process and calm down, and that he’ll talk to her. Jared just nods numbly, but the unspoken questions lay heavy in the air. How long? Does Jared even want to come back after that? He’s starting to regret lying to his parents so much (”literally nothing I tell my parents is true and they have no idea”) because his dad probably assumes that Jared actually has friends or something that he could stay with for a little while.

His eyes are burning from the effort of holding back his tears because Jared is just stubbornly refusing to completely break down.

He’s still in such a state of shock that he’s kind of dissociating a bit, because next thing Jared knows is that he’s in his car and driving somewhere.

It takes him about 5 minutes to realise that he’s on autopilot and is driving to Evan’s house. Once he has that realisation Jared immediately pulls over because he can not go to Evan’s right now.

Partially because he’s seconds away from completely losing it and having a full-on breakdown, and he is just not in a place right now where he could fake being fine (and obviously breaking down in front of Evan is not an option because please, this is Jared we’re talking about). But also because showing up at Evan’s uninvited and asking to stay over would be pretty out of character for Jared, so if Heidi’s home she’s going to (correctly) assume something is wrong and call his parents, and Jared just... can’t deal with that right now.

So he just lets himself finally breakdown. Once he finally calms down he’s so exhausted from everything that he just quickly makes sure the doors are locked and falls asleep almost instantly.

Any hope that the previous day’s events had just been some kind of messed up nightmare is lost when he wakes up in his car and not his bed.

and Jared’s just... not sure what to do really. His dad seems to think that his mum just needs some time to calm down, but how long is Jared supposed to wait? Should he call? Just show up at home? He doesn’t want to be the one to reach out first because fuck that, but the waiting is going to drive him crazy.

He just feels so lost. So Jared kind of throws himself into planning shit so he can feel some sense of control. He figures he can sleep in his car. His parents paid for like 6 months of a gym membership for him for his birthday, which he’s pretty sure was just a passive aggressive comment about his weight, but boy is he grateful for it now because he figures he can go to the gym and shower. He can do his homework at the library. He figures he should buy one of those adapters so you can charge your phone from your car, or maybe a portable charger so he doesn’t risk killing his battery. Jared doesn’t really spend much, so despite not having a job he’s got a decent amount of money saved up just from birthdays and things over the years. Nothing is ideal but like, he can make it work.

Of course, Jared being Jared is incapable of asking for help so he just... doesn’t tell anyone.

He goes to school the next day, and eventually he’s got a little routine going. He sets his alarm on his phone really early on school days so he can go to the gym first. He does like... the absolute bare minimum amount of exercise to avoid suspicion before he showers. He stays late after school to do his homework in the library, and then once the school library closes he tends to go to the public library to either finish his homework or just take advantage of the free internet and watch youtube or something. He’s worked out the best place to park his car overnight so he’s inconspicuous and he’s relatively safe. Like, obviously he locks the doors and covers most of the windows, but it’s still kind of scary sleeping out in public sometimes.

But he hangs out with and stays over at Evan’s as much as possible. Which like, are the best nights of his week, but also sleeping at Evan’s house almost makes Jared feel worse? It just makes him acutely aware of everything he’s lacking right now.

But overall Jared is doing kind of ok, and he thinks he’s doing a pretty damn good job of acting like everything’s normal.

Which... he is absolutely not lmao. Evan and Alana and even a couple of Jared’s teachers are on to him (maybe Connor and Zoe too, although I haven’t decided if they’ll be in this or not). I mean, no one knows exactly what’s happened, but they can tell something is up.

Jared’s just been... off. He’s very flat and his shitty jokes have been a little harsher than usual lately. And Evan’s kind of confused about why Jared suddenly wants to hang out with him so much. Not that he’s complaining, he’s enjoying hanging out more with Jared, but it does seem weird. It’s weird that Jared stays over multiple times a week now, but Evan can barely remember the last time he went to Jared’s house. It’s weird that Jared never comes over if he knows Heidi will be home that night. It’s just... something’s not adding up and Evan can’t quite work out what.

Anyway, better end it here because wow I did not mean to make this so long lmao. It’d probably end with a confrontation, confession and ultimately Jared staying with Heidi and Evan for the foreseeable future. Plus one VERY angry confrontation with Jared’s parents from Heidi lol. I love angst, but I love an (at least somewhat) happy ending even better, so things would turn out alright in the end :)

#tw homophobia #deh wips prompt #oh to live out your biggest fears by projecting onto characters you relate to #but yeah... this one hurts #anyway I kind of like the idea that it's hard to pick out at first #because unless you actually talk to jared it'd seem like he was actually doing really well?#like since he's exercising most days he'd be getting kind of fit #and he's super on top of his school work bc he doesn't really have much else to do #but as soon as someone talks to him they'll just be like... man are you ok?#jared gets kicked out #answered #zoe writes #jared kleinman #deh

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emotionally-imbruised · 6 years ago

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Tell Me This Is Just A Dream

“It’s hard to hear your name when I haven’t seen you in so long.”

LA is fantastic in its own sense, but it’s never been home. No, home is the small town your parents moved to when your mother was well along in her pregnancy with you all those years ago. It’s a simple town, not much going on... but is the one place you hold so dear to your heart and always yearn to return to. This place is Holmes Chapel in Cheshire.

You grew up there. It’s where many friendships were formed, many memories were created, and where you left everything behind. Back in early 2010, your parents were offered new jobs that required your family to move across the pond to North America, and obviously, they took them. This move brought nothing but open doors, and new opportunities; but it also brought on one of your biggest heartbreaks.

You loved everything about Holmes Chapel, loved the people there even more, but couldn’t take the pain of saying goodbye. So when it was time to put the house up for sale and move; you didn’t warn anyone and waited until it was too late to tell them. However, you still did it, and after some tough farewells to some very special people, you left that life behind and ventured westward across the Atlantic Ocean.

Life has been great for the last seven years, and there’s not much for you to complain about. Your family relocated to San Jose, CA, and it was everything you could’ve dreamed of it to be. The weather was rarely as gloomy as it was back home, you made lots of friends and eventually graduated high school before moving to LA for university.

It’s now 2017, and your life back in the UK is just a distant thought that haunts your mind from time to time. Nowadays, you can be found bustling around Los Angeles, living the dream while working for iHeartMedia, all while finishing up uni. Your job in itself is continuously evolving; which has brought you many fresh experiences, as well as introduced you to some incredibly famous and non-famous people.

Your entire job has to do with planning. Events, meetings, promotions; you name it, and you’ve always had a say in the outcomes of everything you’ve helped plan... Well, except for your most recent project. You weren’t really aware of what you getting yourself into signing up for this project, but today is finally the day you get some more details about it and can tie up some loose ends.

The two full trays of various Starbucks drinks wobble in your hands as you walk towards the performance venue you, and your co-workers are working on this beautiful Friday. You’ve been planning this day for quite some time now, but only know the bare minimum about it. All you know is that you’re helping organize what eventually will be a promotional video for an unnamed musician. For whatever reason, your work friends have gone out of their way to not tell you who the artist is, so you can’t help but feel a little excited to finally see who you’ll be working with.

“Ugh finally,” Shay, one of the best friends you’ve made since moving to LA, groans as soon as you walk in through the doors.

“Mmm I’ve been waiting for this,” Julian, your other best friend, tells you as he and Shay come to take a tray of drinks from you. “It’s definitely a caffeine day, and I ugh can’t wait for this weekend off; it’s been a long week.”

“If that’s your guy’s way of saying thank-you than you’re welcome,” you reply and roll your eyes at them.

“Ok drama queen,” Shay snarks as the three of you makes your way towards where a large stage is, along with all your other co-workers, and the filming crew.

“So are you guys going to tell me who we’re shooting this thing for now, or are you going to make me wait still?” You ask monotonously, and see the two smirk at each other. “Hey, I saw that! What was that about?”

“Ohhh nothing,” Julian says in a sing-song voice. “Now why would we tell you who it is if we don’t have too? There’s literally no fun in that, Y/N.”

“...I swear I’m the only one who doesn’t know who we’re working for today, and this literally never happens,” you huff, causing your friends to laugh.

“That’s because you are,” a voice speaks up from near the stage. You turn to see Amber, your boss, walking towards you with a smile on her face. She’s a lovely lady who you’ve become pretty close with while doing this job; so you shake your head as she approaches you to take her drink from the tray you’re holding. “Not for any particular reason really, other than my want to see your reaction when you first see them. Also good outfit choice by the way.”

“Gee thanks Amber,” you grumble, and set the tray down for everyone else to just come to get their drinks from. You then glance down at your ripped jeans and long-sleeved emerald green coloured blouse... Sure you thought you looked good when leaving your apartment an hour ago, but you didn’t see why it really mattered or why Amber was complimenting your outfit, but then it clicked. “Oh my god, if it’s one of my celebrity crushes and you guys didn’t tell me... I’m disowning you as my friends.”

You start smoothing out your shirt, and brush your hand through your hair in an attempt to maintain a semi-decent appearance; all while the other three starts laughing at you again. “Oh, this is going to be good,” Shay states and goes to move away. “Now why don’t we actually get this thing going, and do some work?” You shake your head disapprovingly at her antics but nonetheless go with her to start your work.

About an hour passes, and everything is pretty well good to go. The filming crew is in place, the band members are in position on stage, everything is set up the way it should be; now you’re just waiting for the musician to come out, and get things started. You glance over at Shay and Julian, who just smirk at you in return, as you reach for a bottle of water. Footsteps can be heard from someone entering onto the stage, but you don’t look to them as you glare at your friends; while untwisting the cap, and moving the bottle to your lips to take a sip.

“Good mornin’ everyone, sorry m'late,” a deep British accented voice speaks into a microphone. The red stage-lights dance around and make it hard for you to see the persons face once you snap your gaze to them, but when you do; you instantly start choking on your water. “I’m Harry Styles, and I just wanted to thank you all for helping me out with this today.” You start having a coughing fit and are quick in grabbing everyone’s attention. It takes a minute, but after signaling you were alright in the process of trying to stop the coughing, and with your friends basically crying from laughing so hard; you finally recollect yourself. Your gaze moves back to the stage where Harry squints in an attempt to see what’s going on, and you let out a shaky breath. “S’everything alright over there?”

“Yes Mr. Styles everything’s good,” Julian tells the familiar curly haired brunette on the stage. Harry takes a second but slowly nods.

“Alright, let’s get this thing started then,” he replies and looks to the four members of his band to start playing. The music begins, and you start breathing heavily, all while becoming entranced by his soothing voice; so mesmerized that you don’t notice the people that have gathered around you.

“That’s exactly the type of reaction I was hoping for,” Amber says from behind you, causing you to jump, and you quickly turn around to face her, Shay, and Julian.

“You guys are awful,” you state and cross your arms, feeling a bit of uneasiness starting up. These are three of the few people you’ve actually told your life story to. They know all about you growing up in the UK; also the fact that the Harry Styles was your childhood best friend, and the high school boyfriend that you left behind when you moved to California. “I can’t let him see me, I need to go like right now.”

“Y’know, I kind of didn’t believe that she actually knew him until she showed us those old pictures of them together, but based on what she’s doing... You can’t really think she was ever lying about it,” Shay adds, as you lean over to put your hands on your knees in attempts to keep yourself from hyperventilating.

“Why would I make something like that up?” You snap and take some deep breaths, all while they smile down at you.

“Oh, you’re doing great sweetie,” Julian coos sarcastically with a smirk, and comes over to pat you on the back. “Get those nerves under control though cause you get to talk to him once he’s done.”

“I’m glad my panic attack is amusing to you all,” you grumble with one last breath before standing up straight again. “And why do I have to talk to him? Literally, anyone else could.”

“Because it’ll be for your own good. You need closure,” Amber states as she starts walking towards the stage. “Now quit slacking you three, we’ve got work to do.” Without another word, your other two friends shrug before walking off to begin work, and after one last glance to Harry on stage; you do the same.

Roughly three hours go by, and after a few breaks between songs; everything has been filmed and is good to go. You begin packing up your bag, grabbing all of your belongings to try and make a break for it to enjoy the rest of your afternoon off; but sadly, life couldn’t be that simple. “Oh she’s trying to escape,” Shay yells from her seat a few feet away from you; loud enough for everyone in the room to here.

“Seriously?” You fume at your best friend and dramatically throw your hand into the air.

“Yeah, not happening,” Amber calls out from down at the stage. “Get your arse down here.” You glare at Shay and Julian as they giggle and high-five each other, before reluctantly making your way towards the stage; some best friends they are. The steps you take are slow as you drag your feet in protest, earning yourself an eye-roll from your boss as she turns back around.

“Amber, lovely to see you again,” Harry’s voice speaks up, and starts a swarm of butterflies in your stomach. He moves gracefully across the stage towards where Amber is standing, causing your heartbeat to quicken as the space between the two of you decreases with each step.

“You as well Harry, great work out there,” she praises him, and the all too familiar dimpled grin he gives her feels like a jab right to the heart.

“You’re too kind,” he brushes off the compliment and moves to sit down on the edge of the stage so he’ll be more at level with her.

“Mmm you must’ve only seen me on good days than if you that’s what you think,” she replies, and moves her gaze to you as you finally approach them; still unseen to Harry due to the lights on the stage still shining brightly. “But enough about that, I’d like you to meet one of my best workers. I’ve heard she’s quite the fan of you, and today wouldn't have gone as smooth as it did without all her hard work.” You come to a stop, but she quickly motions you to continue forward. “This is Miss. Y/N Y/L/N.”

His brows immediately furrow at the mention of your name, and all you want to do is crawl under a rock, but instead, you take a deep breath and step to where he can actually see you. “Uh hey, H,” you greet quietly with a small wave and feel like you could almost cry.

His expression instantly changes once he sees you, looking almost as if he’s seen a ghost of some sort. “Y/N?” He asks quietly like he’s trying to confirm that it is indeed you standing in front of him. The two of you awkwardly stare at each other for a moment, unsure of what to do or say.

“I’ll let you two talk,” Amber interrupts your stare-off and makes her way back towards the rest of your co-workers. You move your gaze back to Harry and start feeling small as he seems to be almost studying you.

“So uhm,” you ramble, but are cut off by him hopping down from the stage, and walking right up to you.

“I can’t believe it’s really you!” He exclaims and pulls you in for a tight hug. The gesture throws you off slightly, but it also warms your heart, and you quickly hug him back; gently placing your head on his shoulder, and smiling to yourself. You’re the first to move away, but you hold one another at an arms distance to get a good look at each other, before eventually letting go. He looks good, to sum it up simply. The black long-sleeved button-up shirt he wears displays the many tattoos that cover his arms and chest; you can’t help bet let your eyes wander to them a little bit. But what really catches your eye is his brown curls. You’ve seen pictures and videos of him in the media with long locks, but now his hair is much shorter and very mature looking... All quite different when thinking of the 16-year-old boy from Holmes Chapel, you once knew and loved.

“Y-you look great, Harry,” you tell him honestly, and he smiles.

“And you look absolutely incredible,” he replies and holds your gaze with his enticing green eyes. “Wow, I can’t believe you’re actually here standing in front of me. I, well, I’ve missed you, Y/N. Everyone has.”

“Oh please,” you scoff and look away. “Everyone probably forgot about me the moment I stepped foot out of England.”

“I didn’t,” he protests, and you feel your breath hitch. You swallow hard while his gaze seemingly pierces into you; studying you again as if trying to remember every little detail. “Are you living here in LA?”

“I am,” you tell him with a nod. “Have been for a couple of years now. I moved here from San Jose for uni, and then got hired for this job; which I absolutely love.”

“M’glad to hear,” he responds with another smile.

“And you’ve been doing pretty good for yourself, yeah?” You start and nudge his shoulder playfully. “Mr. world-renown popstar... I’m so proud of you, H, I always knew you were meant to entertain people. And with singing, I just- I don’t know... I am happy to see you, though.”

“Well, you are the one who pushed me to audition for the X Factor... Also is that why you were trying to leave, and avoid me before being called down here?” He asks with a raised eyebrow, and a smirk; causing your face to redden. He starts laughing, and you just don’t know how to respond. “I’m just messing around with you, bub, lighten up a little.”

Your heart flutters at the name he used to call you all the time back home, and you basically just want to melt but know you can’t, and are quick to compose yourself. “You know I was never good with confrontation. Just look at the way I-I uh...” You start but trail off.

“You left,” he finishes for you, and you flinch slightly. He notices your reaction to his words, and his face soon lights up. “Y/N, I don’t know what your schedule is like but-.”

“She’s free,” Julian’s voice calls out from the back of the room. You whip around to glare in the direction his voice came from, and although you can’t see him; you’re determined to look intimidating.

“Well, I guess that answers my question,” Harry chuckles, and you look back to him. “But I think it’ll be more gentleman-like of me to ask still. So, would you like to join me for an early dinner? Uhm, it’s a bit late for lunch, but I think it’d be nice to y’know... talk. If you’re free, and done work, of course.”

“She is,” Amber and Shay call out in unison, which makes Harry laugh again.

“I can speak for myself, you know?” You yell over your shoulder at them; not breaking eye contact with Harry. “I’d love to get dinner with you.”

His smile widens, and the butterflies start swarming in your stomach once again. “Well let’s get going then, shall we?” He asks, and you nod in agreement. He motions for you to follow him, and you do so after taking one last deep breath.

You watch as Harry says goodbye, and thanks to everyone before leading you out of the room. As you’re following after him, you glance to your three friends, and they all give you thumbs up; also signaling for you to give them details later about how everything goes.

The two of you don’t go very far; just to a small diner that’s a little bit down the street from the venue. The older lady at the cash register waves as you and Harry enter, motioning for you’s to take a seat wherever you’d like. Once you’re both settled, awkward silence ensues, and you find yourself staring at the menu you’ve already looked through; just to avoid his gaze.

The lady comes and takes both of your orders, but you just go with coffee for now, and she’s quick filling two mugs with the steaming liquid; giving you your next object to use in avoiding the boy, er- man in front of you. “So,” he finally speaks up, and you’re eyes flutter open a bit more to meet his. “M’just gonna come out and say it.”

His gaze holds yours, as you nod in understanding. “Ok,” you tell him and take a sip of coffee. “I’m all ears.”

“These last seven years of my life have been a complete whirlwind,” he starts, and your heart pangs a little bit; knowing where this conversation is going to go. “I’ve been around the world and back again, multiple times. I’ve made a name for myself, all while doing something I absolutely love, which is singing and making music.”

“I know,” you state. “Harry, it’s so incredible what you’ve done in the last seven years.”

“You see, I don’t see it that way all the time, but there are times like these where I can really think about how grateful I am for how my life has turned out,” he continues. “I’ve seen and done so many amazing things, and even after all these years with how everything has changed; I still find that you’re the person I want to call and talk to about them all.” This comment catches you off guard, and he can see that in the way your expression changes; so he takes that as a cue to keep going. “You were my best friend, Y/N. I wouldn’t have even auditioned for the X Factor if it weren’t for you, mum, and Gemma pushing me to do it; and I am forever thankful for that. But you were a huge part in me deciding to actually do it. When I found out I got through the audition, you were the first person I wanted to call; but then I remembered that I couldn’t.”

“Harry,” you whisper, but he just shakes his head, and keeps talking.

“You’d already been gone for a few months when it all happened, and that hurt,” he explains. “It’d been a few months since you just up and moved to a different country, but the wounds I felt still seemed so fresh...” He takes a breath, to seemingly try to collect his thoughts; and you can feel the tears pricking your eyes. “You didn’t even say goodbye, Y/N. You told me you were leaving; I got upset, and the next thing I knew; you were gone.”

“I’m so sorry,” you say quietly, as the tears start pouring from your eyes. “I just-, I didn’t know how to say goodbye. I didn’t want to say goodbye to you, or your family, our friends, or even Holmes Chapel as a whole; so I figured it’d hurt less if I avoided that part. I couldn’t have been more wrong. I wouldn’t be surprised if you or anyone else from home hated me.”

“I could never hate you Y/N, I loved you,” he states, and you feel like you could just burst. Harry Styles loved you?

“You did?” You ask, slightly confused.

“Course I did,” he confirms. “Still do. Pretty sure there’ll always be a special place in my heart for the girl I first loved.” Your heart screams at you to tell him that you still love him too, but your mind says otherwise.

“You always were such a sap,” you joke in an attempt to cover up the blush you feel creeping across your features. Harry laughs half-heartedly, and looks down; almost seeming to be hurt. The lady comes over one last time, and Harry offers to pay for the coffee. The two of you agree to head out and allow the awkward silence to consume you’s once again.

“This was nice,” he says as you both return to the parking lot of the venue. You look up at him to find him staring at his feet as the two of you keep walking. Your mind thinks back to his reaction when you called him a sap after he basically said he still had feelings for you.

“Y’know, I haven’t really dated anyone since we were sixteen,” you begin explaining, and he looks to you with interest. “I mean sure, I’ve had a couple of flings; but nothing serious.”

“How come?” He asks gently. “If you don’t mind me asking.”

“None of them felt like the one,” you continue. “I've only had the feeling of actually being with someone so perfect for me it hurt, once. And it wasn’t fair for me to compare these other people to a love so special.”

“Sounds like a pretty great person if they managed to make you feel that way about them,” he mumbles as he kicks a rock, and a huge smile stretches across your face.

“Yeah but that person is now this big rockstar just starting on his own as a solo artist, actually,” you state, and his eyes instantly snap to you; causing you to let out a small laugh. “That person was you, dummy. I never thought our relationship was legitimate, H, I always thought we were too young. But looking back now, we really did love each other. And I think-.”

Your ramble is cut off by him gently placing his hand under your chin, and tilting it upwards so his lips can connect with yours. You let it happen, and soon find yourself melting into the kiss; forgetting about everything. His arm wraps around your waist to pull you closer; deepening the kiss, as your hands slide up his chest. His tongue begs for access to your mouth, which you grant, and let out a small moan. This causes him to slowly break away from the kiss and place his forehead against yours. He pulls away, and you can see that he’s sporting a matching blush on his face to the one that you can feel on yours.

“Sorry,” he apologizes and nervously brushes a hand through his curls. “I shouldn’t have done that, I mean it’s been seven years. But, I missed that feeling. Always did like kissing yeh.”

“I did too,” you tell him with a smile, and he seems to become less tense.

“You did?” He asks, and you nod before pulling him back down towards you for another quick peck. As soon as you pull away again, your eyes meet his, and you can see that his are full of longing. Without much time to react, he crashes his lips to yours once again in a full-on make-out session. His hands placed on your hips, and gently push you backward until you back meets what is presumably a car. The grip he has on your waist tightens, and you move your hands up to tangle them in his wad of curls. It gets pretty heated, but suddenly people start... cheering?

“YAS, get it, girl!” A male voice calls out, and you break away from Harry to look over at who it is. Your gaze immediately falls onto Julian and Shay as they walk out the doors of the venue.

“Oh my god,” you squeak, and instinctively bury your head into Harry’s chest. He chuckles, and it warms your heart. Just being with Harry has felt like being at home again, and you don’t want to let that feeling go. You mindlessly wrap your arms around his middle, and he wraps his around you in a hug.

“Well that was fast,” Shay says once the two reach you and Harry, and raises an eyebrow.

“Nothing happened so you’s can quit it with the judgy looks,” you snap, and lift your head from Harry’s chest to get a better look at them.

“If you want to call what we just saw ‘nothing,’ then you may as well call me straight,” Julian chimes in, and you roll your eyes as a smile dances on your lips. “Both statements are untrue, and you know it.”

“Whatever,” you grumble, and move from Harry so you can face them. “Don’t you’s have anything better to do than pick on me?”

“Yeah, we’re going to go get some mimosas actually,” Shay explains, and you nod knowingly. “We were going to text you to see if you’d like to join, but now we can just ask. So do you want to come or not? Also, Harry, you’re more than welcome to join as well.”

“I’d love too,” Harry says from behind you, and you turn around to look at him.

“Really?” You ask, and he just smirks.

“Great, then it’s settled. Let’s go,” Julian directs and turns to walk to his car with Shay in tow.

You shake your head at your friends, but go to follow after them anyways; until a hand grabs ahold of your wrist. “Was hoping this night would last a bit longer, bub,” Harry leans down to whisper into your ear seductively. You feel chills, and he just continues to smirk as he takes a couple of steps away. “Well come on then, don’t want to keep your friends waiting now do we?”

“Oh, of course not,” you reply sarcastically and follow after him...This is bound to be quite an interesting night.

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thespacequail · 7 years ago

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Jushinki Pandora (ep. 1)

Wow, just...I feel shocked. I had super low expectations of this show when I heard about it. I was expecting loads of pointless exposition, horrible CG animation, and really bad science. I got only half of one of those things. This review is gunna get real rambly, real fast, but if you liked shows like Attack on Titan, or Kabaneri of the Iron Fortress, give this show a try.

>Let me tell you about exposition for a few minutes, have you ever in real life had a conversation about how electricity has revolutionized how we communicate, or walked to the bus stop explaining to your friend how the internal combustion engine accelerated humanity out of the rural agricultural society of ages past into the urban metropolis we now call home? No. Ok well, maybe once, as like a joke, or a thought experiment, or you just saw a show about it on the History channel. Point is, most people don’t normally talk like that, they don’t discuss common knowledge for no reason, and yet this happens in so many shows and movies. When that revelation was dropped on me, I was pissed because now I notice it everywhere, and honestly it is just lazy writing. Characters don’t need to tell other characters that “In this world, magic is everything.” cause they live there so they should bloody know that! It’s dialogue that only exists to catch the viewer up to speed, and that’s lazy writing.

>So what’s all that got to do with Last Hope? Everything. Because Last Hope (so far) doesn’t do this. The only time exposition is directly explained to the viewer is a short, narrated overview of the situation the world is in and generally how it happened. It’s kinda like the bit in My Hero Academia where Deku explains quirks and Heroes to the audience, that part is key, it’s narration separate from the actual story that explicitly tells the audience “this is the one confusing thing that makes our world different, get it? Good, on with the show.” Back to Last Hope, character’s don’t talk about how “BRAI have hunted humanity to near extinction so that’s why we live in this run down shack.” “Yes but I have developed these anti-BRAI bug zappers so we are safe here.” Nah, fuck that, you know how they do that scene? The main character literally stands around outside buck naked, we get a wide shot of their re-purposed airplane home, and though Leon (the MC) does talk about the BRAI repellent, they mention it the same way we would casually ask if someone brought a citronella candle to the picnic, after that he’s just talking to himself about making sure it doesn’t short circuit and fail, only to stub his toe on all the junk he has lying around cause he was absorbed in thought. I just love this whole scene, from Leon listing off possible annoyances to him struggling to cook dinner, it does well to humanize him and Chloe in a humorous but believable way. I also like how the military guy (whose name escapes me) refers to Leon as “that one guy” until the end where he calls him by his full name, followed by “the man who destroyed the world”. Now I can hear you thinking “But isn’t that expository dialogue? Everyone should know that already, that’s just a cheap cliffhanger for the audience.” To which I say, is it common knowledge? A man who was exiled from the city (which is another great thing Leon’s adopted sister didn’t exposite about to him [and the fact they left their relationship implied was SO good {I’m getting off track, where was I?}]), the reasoning for his exile wouldn’t necessarily be common knowledge to most people outside of the government. And, it’s not used as a title of exposition, but a term of resentment, the military guy is making it clear he knows who Leon is, and will not be taking things lightly when dealing with him. This is good stuff. I could go on but I have other stuff I want to talk about. If you watch the episode with this in mind you’ll understand what I’m getting at.

>The science. I love science. I know a lot about it, so I was worried this show would just throw some science-y sounding words to seem smart to hand wave away what should just be magic. But honestly, it holds water, it was relatively accurate. The Quantum Generator? That’s a real thing designed by Tesla, and yeah, maybe we could build a big one in a decade or two, I buy that. Go look up a video on QEGs, and while you’re at it, look up quantum computers too, cause Leon’s Multidimensional Attack makes some sense too, sorta, we’re getting into magic territory, but it looked cool af, so I’m ok with it. The evolutionary field though? Looks like we’re playing fast and loose with the concept of mutations and evolution, but if I can accept X-Men mutants having basically magic powers for no reason, I can let this one slide too. Hopefully the hand waving is kept to a bare minimum and the writers actually do their homework.

>Leon is great. He’s a genius, but he’s not perfect. He’s a klutz, he struggles with cooking because he over analyzes the process, and he’s a terrible pilot. Let me say that again for the ones in the back, THE MAIN CHARACTER OF A MECH ANIME IS NOT A NATURAL THE FIRST TIME HE’S SHOWN PILOTING! He flails around, unable to dodge slow hits, other characters comment about how he pilots like an amateur, the only reason he is able to defeat this giant enemy crab is cause if the hyperdrive, which I can only assume will be a consistent deus-ex-machina to save the day, I don’t mind this but I really hope they show him learning over time how to be a better pilot because of this, struggling cause he over thinks it, but getting better as he comes to understand the “human element” his calculations lack. Cheesy? kinda, but that’s ok if it’s done well.

>The 2D animation is really nice. I like the look of the characters, locations like Leon’s home and the military command center feel right (lived in and familiar/oppressive and orderly respectively). The CG though...ok, I get why it’s being used, it gives the BRAI an unnatural, otherworldly feel, and for the most part it works, but the 3D model quality looks kinda dated at times. It’s not like, Berserk 2016 bad, but Pixar this certainly ain’t. The transformer mechs are kinda cool, if not superfluous. Why do they need to transform? Why not have different classes of mechs? Some that drive like tanks on steroids, ones that only fly and have to conserve power so they don’t just fall out of the sky, human shaped ones for melee combat or using massive cannons as if it were a rifle. Why do they all have to have hands and turn into cars and motorcycles? Just seems like a waste in this post-apocalyptic world where I can only assume resources are limited. That being said there are some shots, like Leon in the hyperdrive mech facing off against the giant enemy crab, that look freaking amazing. It can be done show, make it work.

Man I’ve been ranting for so long and I still have stuff I didn’t go into, like the one bounty hunter who keeps his cat in the cockpit with him, or the crab upgrading itself mid-fight even though it was already winning, GAH! Go watch this show, it’s dumb fun that knows how to be smart and was made with a degree of care and detail usually only seen from big name studios/directors.

#jushinki pandora #last hope #anime #anime review #spring 2018 anime

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uk-news-talking-politics · 5 years ago

Text

Brexit 2020: Everything you need to know about Boris Johnson's trade deal nightmare

By Ian Dunt

Cool, so everything's sorted right? Brexit is getting done, everything's going back to normal and I never have to talk about trade again.

Oh yeah, no sorry. That's all a lie. We are about to enter the most perilous system-level recalibration of an advanced economy in trading history.

What.

Yeah, all that nightmare of the last four years was the easy part. Now we have to figure out our future trading relationship with the EU.

I saw Boris Johnson on the telly the other day.

Really? That never happens anymore.

No, it was crazy. He just popped up. It was like a Big Foot sighting. Anyway, he seemed to suggest it was all really easy. We'd get it done in a year and then be free to do whatever we want.

Yeah, that's the official narrative. But the reality is very different.

Are you suggesting that the government is making a sustained attempt to deceive the public in order to hide the fact that they have an impossible set of negotiating goals and no competence to deliver them?

Yes, I know. It's hard to believe.

I know what happens now. You start talking about fisheries and regulatory alignment and customs procedures and then I gradually lose the will to live and have to order extremely expensive whisky.

That's right, that's how this works. So here's the thing. The government wants to get the Brexit deal negotiated, ratified and implemented in eleven months, before December 31st. They were entitled to an extension but have decided not to take it. That means the deal is going to have to be proper bare-bones - a completely stripped-down set of negotiating goals.

Like what?

Tariffs, basically. Nothing else. Just eliminate the tariffs.

What are tariffs again?

They're taxes on goods crossing borders. The thing is, most tariffs are already very low. Decades of worldwide tariff-reduction rounds have hammered them down in pretty much every area but agriculture. So it's a very modest bar to set. It also means that services - which are kind of key to our economy - are completely forgotten about. And it does nothing about the real problem areas of trade - alignment, customs checks and rules of origin.

Yeah, that's it. That's where I switch off. I swear these words are like hypnotic suggestions to close down brain function.

Bear with me, they're all pretty simple when you break them down. And the implications of them can smash local economies, which then has a massive political impact. Will people blame Brexit? The government? Or the EU? Remainers? Immigrants? The knock-on effect of these decisions will define our politics for years to come. Which is troubling, because it's not clear the government has any idea what it's doing.

How so?

Take the distinction between goods and services. Sounds simple right? Goods are things and services are, well, services - legal, financial, hairdressing, whatever. But actually that's a crude distinction that doesn't reflect the reality of how businesses work. Car companies, for instance, sell cars. But many of them also often offer the financing for the car, which allows the person buying it to pay in monthly installments. So in that capacity they're actually functioning as a mini-bank. And banking is…

A service.

Exactly. The same is true for loads of companies, like IBM, say, or Hewlett Packard. They sell things. But they also sell services. So even at this very basic level, going for a goods-only deal already has a massive knock-on effect on businesses. If they want to keep on selling the services in Europe, they have to internally restructure to get into the right regulatory regime. Sometimes that'll be big news - they'll close an office or factory. Sometimes it'll be a case of moving staff around or bulking up whatever office they have on the continent to get recognition there, and it'll slip under the radar. But the long-term danger is that all the high-knowledge, proper value-added activity goes to Europe.

Grim.

Yep. And things get uglier when you look at regulations.

Yeah I heard about this. What are they exactly?

Regulations are one of the key aspects of international trade. Countries have different regulatory regimes. So when they trade, people have to show that they are satisfying the requirements of the country the good ends up in. That entails a lot of time and paperwork. Until now, Britain has been part of Europe's regulations regime. Now it wants to completely detach itself. But we're so deeply ingrained in continental trading networks that we can't afford either time or paperwork.

How come?

Basically because of our reliance on a manufacturing system called Just-In-Time. Manufacturing depends on this to keep costs down. It means that you avoid holding a lot of stock. Instead, you get the parts you need, literally, just in time. And we are absolutely locked into this. So for instance BMW makes the engines for its Mini model at Hams Hall just outside Birmingham. But the engine blocks come from France to the UK, where they're drilled and processed, then go to Cologne in Germany for more engineering, then back to the UK for final assembly. GKN in Birmingham also makes the drive line for many cars - this is what transmits power from the engine to the wheels. But it uses components from Spain, Italy, France, Germany and the UK. Millions of components come across the Channel every day to arrive just as they're needed.

Is this primarily a car thing?

No, it goes across the board, in Britain's most successful manufacturing sectors. Take aviation. Nearly 80% of aerospace components manufactured in the UK are exported. And the important part there is in the word 'components'. That's what we do. We don't make the whole plane. As a country, we specialise in wings, landing gear, engines and avionic systems - the electrical equipment in the cockpit. All of that is regulated by the European Aviation Safety Authority (Easa). Everything you see on a plane in Europe, numbering over 5,000 different parts, has been vouched for by them, down to the little trolley serving you drinks when you ask for your fourth rum and Coke and the air steward starts to look at you suspiciously. Oh, and his training is overseen by them too, as is the pilot's, and that of the engineers.

It's the godfather of aviation regulation.

That's right. The industry is clear: it needs to hold Easa tight. And not just Easa. It also wants a close relationship with Reach - Europe's chemical safety regulation system - because they use those chemicals in the manufacturing process. There is zero reason to deviate from this regulatory framework. There are literally no upsides. The UK is not going to start setting international standards for aviation on its own. The trend in the global industry is towards alignment, because everyone wants the same things - a safe product, with fuel efficiency, which is clean and quiet and cheap to run, and which can be traded in a complex supply chain with a minimum of friction.

Can you stay in Easa from outside the EU though?

Sure. It's an EU body, but it has various agreements with non-EU countries. Or you can just align and basically mimic whatever it does. And why not? The industry will make products to those specifications anyway, simply to trade them easily.

So surely that's what we'd do. It sounds insane to do anything else.

Yes it would be insane, wouldn't it? But apparently that's what's going to happen.

You're not serious.

Who knows. Theresa May's administration had pretty much decided to stay in the system. The political declaration for the future relationship she signed with the EU said the UK would "explore the possibility of cooperation" with Easa and then added: "In this context, the United Kingdom will consider aligning with Union rules in relevant areas." But then things got a bit weird. Johnson updated the political declaration when he got his deal and he made some small but quite striking changes.

Like?

Well the line on 'exploring possibilities' stayed, but the following sentence, on alignment, was deleted. That raised a lot of alarm. And then the chancellor, Sajid Javid, told the Financial Times this weekend that "there will not be alignment, we will not be a ruletaker". So right now, if we're to take the government's word for it, no - we're going to pull away, for no reason at all, and at enormous cost. Or they could be lying to sound tough and Brexity. Or they could think it's a negotiating gambit with the EU. Who knows?

OK. So you've now been talking about regulations for what feels like several days. Is that it?

No I'm afraid not. The government also wants out of the customs union. That means it's also a customs problem. Manufacturers will have to fill out two sets of forms - one for regulations, one for customs. In the case of agriculture, they'll also have to satisfy health checks - these are called sanitary and phytosanitary measures. And that takes place on or near the border.

Please tell me this section is over. Hell, please tell me it's all over and the final days are upon us. Anything to escape this relentless carnival of doom.

The worst bit is yet to come, I'm afraid. It's called rules of origin and it is horrible. It's a kind of bureaucracy that kicks in when you have a trade agreement.

How does that make sense? Surely trade agreements are suppose to reduce bureaucracy.

Yep, but they need an insurance policy. So imagine the UK and EU do a trade agreement eliminating tariffs. And then the UK does a separate agreement with the US eliminating tariffs.

Sounds ideal.

Quite. But the EU and US don't have a trade deal eliminating tariffs. So now there is an incentive for the US to ship goods to the UK for entry into the EU as a way of sidestepping the taxes on their exports to Europe, but without having to make any of the concessions a trade deal would involve. Rules of origin checks are how you get around that problem.

How do they work?

The purpose of the rules is to find out where something was made. But the way of doing that changes depending on what kind of good it is. There's different rules in different sectors. Sometimes they measure a country's economic contribution to the product, such as its capital or the labour or intellectual input. There's also different grades of change in the product. You often have to show that the product has transformed from one customs category to another in a substantial way.

Did something terrible happen to you when you were a child?

Hey I didn't make the rules. But they do make sense. And this, arguably more than regulations or customs, is going to be one of the defining issues impacting on Britain in the years to come. Actually, it's already happening.

How so?

The EU and South Africa, for instance, have a deal on rules of origin allowing components from the other side to count towards the 'local content' tally. But when the UK leaves, its components will automatically be excluded from the total. So last July BMW redirected engine production from the UK to Germany for South African production. That could be the start of a trend.

How big a problem is this?

Very big. British car production leans heavily on parts and processes in the EU and Turkey. If those are excluded from the calculations, they wouldn't satisfy the rules of origin requirements. And even working it out is a nightmare - a horrible tangled web of multiple supply chains, with their own separate supply chains for component parts, and then multiple layers of subcontractors and goods going back and forth. And it's not just goods like cars and planes either. The same goes for food. Chickens reared in the UK often go off to the Netherlands for slaughter then come back and are turned into ready meals. So how much work went into the chicken to make it British? And what happens when it's put on a frozen supermarket pizza?

Civilised people don't put chicken on pizza.

That's where you're wrong. Chicken is a perfectly respectable pizza topping. But even if the chicken is British, what about the dough, the tomato sauce and all the other stuff? It's a nightmare. Just working this stuff out will put a massive new burden on British producers, who never had to do any of it before. And that assumes they can even pass the test and get the product to a level where it has enough domestic components to satisfy the rules.

Is there any way out of this?

In terms of the faff of it, no. But there is a way to make the test easier to pass. We need the rules of origin to have something called a cumulation provision.That means some inputs from outside the UK count towards domestic content. There are two main ways to do that: bilateral or diagonal. Bilateral would mean stuff done in the EU and UK would count. Diagonal includes the UK and EU and extends it to other countries who have trade deals with both of us. That would fix the South Africa problem BMW had. But even there they have different levels. We would want something called 'full cumulation', meaning that no matter how small the work done in different countries, it counts.

So it's a no-brainer, right? You go for full cumulation diagonal rules of origin. Oh and look at that. You have made the most unspeakable words come out of my mouth.

Yep, you totally would. But that's in the EU's gift. It gives them significant leverage over us. And honestly, listening to the weirdly bullying rhetoric coming from the UK government, it's not clear Downing Street realises that.

Election went to their head.

There's a lot that's gone to their head.

OK so I think I get this. It's ultimately pretty simple right? The Brits want the Brexit talks done in one year so they've reduced their negotiating goal to tariff elimination and that is going to hurt us.

Not all of us equally. Small firms will be hit harder than large firms and poorer areas will be hit harder than richer areas.

But of course, because the reality of the world is inversely proportional to any sense of moral justice.

Pretty much. Small firms selling less than £250,000 of merchandise to the EU, of which there are tens of thousands, will be forced into filling out all sorts of forms they've never had any contact with before. That'll be a much bigger burden on them than it will the big firms selling over that amount, or who already trade with the rest of the world. And the cost of adopting the new system might outweigh the benefit of exporting the goods in the first place.

Why does this mostly affect poorer areas?

Well there's a cruel irony to the effects of a hard Brexit: It won't really hurt Remain-voting areas but it's likely to seriously damage Brexit-supporting areas.

This is insane.

Yes, it is. The kinds of industries which could get really pummelled - automobile, aerospace and that - are mainly based in the Midlands and the North. Remain-voting London, on the other hand, is less exposed to European markets. It's economy is already hyper-globalised, arguably more so than any other city in the world. Decision-makers in the capital are often on the phone to Namibia, Honduras or Belize. But the decision-makers in Hull are more likely to be on the phone to Denmark and Germany.

Gotcha.

There's another problem too.

Oh cool, another one, yeah why not.

Tariffs aren't the only ask. Britain has also got a negotiating goal on fishing.

Fishing? Really? Surely that's a tiny dot in the economy. And given that they've given up services you wouldn't expect them to get too het up about.

True. But it matters to the communities who do it and it has a political importance that far exceeds its economic impact. Britain also has a watertight legal case for its demand. Basically, sovereign coastal states have a 200 mile limit out to sea in which they can fish, under the UN Law of the Sea Convention.

Cool name for an international convention.

Isn't it. The whole thing is very Aquaman.

I always preferred Namor.

Everyone sensible does. He has those little wings on his ankles which let him fly. That is so preposterous and wonderful at the same time. Imagine what it looks like to see him fly with the little wing thingies on his ankles.

You were talking about fisheries policy.

Ah yes. So the British position is simple. We are now going to be a sovereign coastal state. We want our 200 mile limit. We'll decide what goes on there. The EU position is very different. It wants everything to stay the same as it is right now.

And what is the status quo for fishing exactly?

Basically anything outside of 12 miles from a member state is a common area. The stocks of individual fish species are then divided up between countries in set quotas to prevent overfishing. So Britain might have a 15% share of a particular stock, for instance. Those quotas are set. They do not change. But each year scientists provide advice on the total allowable catch. If it was 100,000 tonnes, Britain would get 15,000 tonnes that year. And that's how they divide up the stock.

So they want that to stick.

Yeah. But Britain, on the other hand, will probably want something like what Norway has. Each year, in the autumn, Norway gets together with the Europeans and sorts out some annual fish arrangements. It's fraught and tense, but it has a lot of power in the talks. They haggle over how much of a quota it gets on certain stocks. And unlike in the EU, that quota can change. Sometimes, if no agreement can be reached, Norway just says you can't fish in their waters at all. Britain would love to operate just like that.

Why can't it? You said the law is on the UK side.

It is, but the leverage isn't.

Recurring theme.

Quite. We can take control of our waters and block anyone fishing within 200 miles of them if we want, but there's a problem: we don't eat our own fish. Eighty per cent of what we catch goes to the EU. The fish we actually eat - good old British fish and chips - mostly comes from Norway and Iceland.

Ok, but so what?

So the European threat is simple. If we don't do what they want they'll put tariffs on fish. That would absolutely hammer our fishing industry. The tariffs are high in this area and it would apply on almost everything it sells.

OK so what about some sort of compromise? Maybe the UK could stay in the EU system but they agree to rejig the quotas a bit to placate us.

Tempting, but the trouble is that would involve opening up the whole quota debate across the EU again. It would be like opening Pandora's Fish Box. They won't do that.

So we're faced with two sides with really quite distant goals in a highly emotional area of trade.

Yep. Which is why it's instructive to look at how they plan to talk about this. Britain wants to talk about fish separately to everything else. But the Europeans aren't having any of that. They want to bring the issue into the general trade discussion. And that'll be the attitude throughout - the British trying to silo off individual topics so they can't be used as leverage against each other and the Europeans making it more comprehensive.

What is it the Europeans actually want?

I thought you'd never ask. It's quite simple. They don't want Britain to undercut them. And that's not just about price - it's about regulations, subsidies and taxes.

What do you mean?

Well take Ireland. It basically functions as a kind of tax haven. This distorts the market and leads a bunch of major international companies to set up base there, where they pay hardly any tax. Countries like France hate that. Now, they might not be able to fully control tax policy, but they will want to make damn sure the same thing doesn't happen with Britain.

This is the Singapore of Europe thing right?

Right. Britain will be experiencing two things simultaneously after the end of the transition period. First, a degree of damage to its trading status, the exact extent of which depends on how the trade talks go. And second, some freedom it did not have before. So where does that lead you? Well you're still a big country which can encourage companies to set up with you because of your infrastructure, language, culture and all that. So why not slash corporate taxes to the bone, lower regulations and subsidise business? Make yourself as low standard and attractive as possible. The Europeans want firm commitments to stop this happening.

How do you know?

When the new European Commission president Ursula von der Leyen came to London recently her priorities were clear: "Zero tariffs, zero quotas, zero dumping." That's an interesting set of priorities. Used in this context, 'zero dumping' sounds like code for UK firms undercutting European ones.

Like how?

Well environmental regulations for one. The EU is about to bring in a massive new green initiative, including carbon tax and carbon VAT tax. It doesn't want that undermined by Britain basically exporting lots of dirty carbon to the EU. Same with what's called 'social dumping' - unfair labour practices like easy firing laws. And the same with subsidies - throwing cash at an industry so it can outperform its competitors overseas. This is disciplined at the WTO, but China does very well operating in the grey area of the rules. Britain could try and do the same.

This is really their main priority?

Pretty much. Britain isn't their biggest concern globally - the US and China are - but it is a big meaty economy, which can heavily undercut them, right on their doorstep. Lowering environmental or labour or subsidy standards would allow this, and might tempt firms over from the rest of the world to invest in the UK rather than the EU - or, hell, even get firms in the EU to move. Taken together, this is called the 'level playing field' debate. And it is central to the European negotiating aim.

So this is where one of the main battles will be?

Yep. And it has a knock-on effect on the timetable. Johnson is desperate to get this all done in eleven months. But the level playing field issue has a procedural impact which could make that impossible.

How so?

It's because of how the EU works. It's split up into different competencies. Some things member states have pretty much to themselves, like criminal justice. Some things are mixed competencies, like the environment. And some things are exclusive competencies of the EU, like trade. If the talks with the UK were completely focused on trade, the European Commission could insist that it has exclusive competence. That would be great news for the UK. It would mean that only the Council, where national leaders meet, and the parliament, where MEPs vote, needed to sign off on the deal. But if the deal expands to include things like the environment - and the level playing field issue does exactly that - then it becomes a mixed agreement. And that means you need each and every member state to ratify it according to their domestic political arrangements.

Christ alive. So every national parliament would need to OK it?

Yeah and not just them. In some cases, their constitutional arrangements mean even regional parliaments, like the one in Wallonia in Belgium, would also need to ratify. When Canada did a trade deal with the EU, Wallonia actually refused and for a brief moment it looked like the whole thing would fall down.

Damn.

And actually it goes further than that. A non-mixed agreement would be decided by a qualified vote in the Council. That's important, because it means you don't have to keep them all on board - just most of them. But if it has to be decided by every individual state, you need something for everyone in there, and nothing too terrible for anyone either. The whole thing becomes a lot more complicated and hard to negotiate.

Can the UK prevent this?

It's unlikely. Nearly everyone believes this is a mixed agreement. Member states want to maintain EU unity, but they all have different interests with the UK. They'll want to be able to have an impact on negotiations.

So that it then? There's no way Johnson can get his deal ratified in time?

Yes and no. There is still a get-out clause. The UK and EU can take the trade aspects and provisionally apply them in areas where the EU has exclusive competence. Then the deal goes out for ratification to national parliaments, for however long that takes. And then when they've agreed, it's all put back together and gets properly ratified. There's a bit of wriggle room, basically.

OK.

The trouble is what happens if a member state says no. That happens. The Netherlands rejected the EU's association agreement with Ukraine after a referendum. Greece decided it wanted protection for Ouzo in the South African talks. And if that happens, you have to reopen the agreement and work it all through again to try and find a compromise. Basically, you are sucked into the domestic and regional politics of 27 other member states. And there's no predicting which way that will go.

God.

Yeah. And then there's the thing we haven't mentioned, which is an absolute monster of administrative confusion and grim political consequences.

I can't believe this isn't over yet and you are still talking. Have I died and gone to the Bad Place?

We're all in the Bad Place. You must surely know that now.

Yeah, good point. OK, hit me.

Northern Ireland.

Christ, I'd forgotten about that.

So has the British government. This week, the Stormont Assembly voted unanimously - all parties and not a single vote against - to withhold consent from Johnson's Brexit deal. But even without their consent, it is going to be imposed on them. And it is an absolute godawful mess.

Why?

The deal Johnson did with the EU on Northern Ireland says that it stays in the UK customs territory but follows EU customs rules. It's not clear that he understood the implications of this. It means that a British trader selling into Northern Ireland would need to prove the goods are going to stay there, or pay the EU tariff.

Doesn't sound so bad.

But think about how weird it is. All around the world, goods arriving at a customs border are asked questions about the past - what is it, where was it made, how was it made? But now they are going to be asked questions about their future - where will it end up? And that is fundamentally unknowable. How do you prove it stayed in Northern Ireland? Let's say it's by a receipt on sale. How do you prove that the person you sold it to isn't then selling it into the EU? And this isn't just for final goods. It's also for goods for processing. So you need to know about the supply chain of the people you sell to as well.

I see the problem.

We don't even really have much data to prepare us for this because we don't track British trade to Northern Ireland, for the simple reason that it was always treated as domestic. The kind of information you'd usually have to prepare for a free trade agreement simply doesn't exist.

This is horrible.

It gets much worse. How is Northern Ireland supposed to prepare for this? If the British government succeeds in securing zero tariffs across the board, then life gets marginally easier, although you'd still need to deal with regulatory checks. But if it doesn't, we won't know what the outstanding tariffs will be until close to the deadline. And the Northern Irish system needs to be up and running at the end of transition on December 31st, with all the infrastructure and monitoring that entails. Put simply: It can't be done.

What's Johnson's plan?

He doesn't have one, or at least he hasn't revealed it. Probably the former. He still insist trade will be frictionless, even though this simply cannot be true by virtue of the deal he himself signed. The government also insists that "largely electronic" processes - the high-tech-solutions band back together again for a reunion tour - will solve everything. And then, even if everything works out in the best possible way and all the highest aspirations of the high-tech solutions come to pass, there is still a ghastly problem we have to face.

Alright, I'm strapped in. What is it?

Rules of origin.

No, come on. Not again man. Don't do this to me. We've done that.

Yeah, but it applies here too. The Northern Ireland arrangement is permanent. It stays in place even if the UK and EU have a trade agreement. And that means it has to function as if it's in the EU customs union. And that means…

Rules of origin between Britain and Northern Ireland.

Exactly. Those laborious, nightmarish requirements, carved right into UK territory.

Do they have to do these checks at the border?

No. You can do it away from the border. But the impact on businesses will be huge. Exporters from Britain, who are used to sending things to Northern Ireland as if it were the same country, will suddenly face the full bureaucratic horror show of rules of origin. They will need to decide if they want to go to all the work of figuring out where all their inputs come from, and where their suppliers source their inputs, and where their supplier's suppliers source their inputs. Or whether it is cheaper to simply stop exporting to Northern Ireland. Which many of them are very likely to do.

What's the political consequence of this?

It shows that Johnson's promise of frictionless trade between Britain and Northern Ireland is an outright lie. In fact, his deal creates a permanent border within the UK. It will never go away. It is set in stone. And the worst part, the really immoral part, is that this is happening without the consent of the people it is being imposed on. How that plays out, against the background of Irish politics and the prospect of sudden infrastructure and monitoring arrangements, and impossible timetables, is anyone's guess. But one thing is clear: No responsible person would have done this.

OK. Please tell me this is over now.

Yes. But also, it's only just beginning.

Just on the off chance that I fell asleep through any of that, can you give me a quick executive summary.

Sure. Johnson has set himself an arbitrary one-year deadline for a trade talk with the EU. The consequence of this is that the deal is bare bones, excluding services or - probably, if they're not lying - alignment on goods. Unless he changes course, this will be highly damaging to UK industry, especially those based in the Midlands and the North. He also wants control of fisheries. The EU want fisheries to stay as they were and a set of level playing field provisions to stop the UK undercutting them in future. They will try to secure these outcomes by keeping all the issues in play at the same time, so they can leverage them against each other. Whatever happens, the UK must deal with rules of origin requirements, which are extremely painful and will have potentially ruinous results between Britain and Northern Ireland.

Can you make it shorter than that?

The government either does not know what it is doing or is not prepared to reveal what it is doing. We are heading towards a truly disastrous set of outcomes unless that changes.

Thank you. And also please never talk to me again.

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loveisblindfanfiction · 8 years ago

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Epilogue

So. Much. Pain.

I didn’t expect there to be this much pain.

I mean sure, I had just undergone a surgery where they had literally taken my eyeball out of the socket, attached someone else’s corneas and then placed it back inside my head, but still. Should it have been this painful?

It felt like someone was twisting a knife inside both of my eye sockets. A knife so long that it was reaching through to the other side of my skull and causing pain to throb throughout my entire head.

For the first twenty-four hours after my surgery, everything was the same for me, apart from the pain. A thick bandage covered my eyes and I was essentially still bind. Despite having working eyes, theoretically.

I laid in my hospital bed with Kit holding my hand so I could not rip the bandages off like I desperately wanted to. I had to wait, according to the doctors, for things to heal and settle in. I had never been so impatient in my life.

The floral scent of flowers filled my room when I woke up from surgery and I knew Kit had brought me flowers.

“You didn’t have to do that.” I told him as I shifted around on the scratchy hospital blankets, trying to get comfortable. Though nothing could ease my discomfort as the pain in my eyes was too great and I was too impatient to rid myself of the bandages and see for the first time in years.

“Of course I did. You’re in hospital. You’ve had surgery. You deserve flowers.” He told me.

“Elective surgery.” I reminded him.

“It’s still surgery and it’s still painful.” He said.

“Don’t remind me.” I groaned as I flopped my bandaged head against the pillows in exhaustion.

Getting the call from the doctor telling me that they had a cornea transplant ready for me was one of the best phone calls of my life.

The matter was timely so I had to cancel a photoshoot I had scheduled later that week as the procedure was going to take a minimum of three days. The surgery itself was only six hours, but the healing time of twenty-four hours and then another twenty-four hours of observation once the bandages were off.

Then I was ordered five days of rest at home before I went out into the world.

Kit had been away in Belfast shooting the eighth and final season of Game of Thrones when I’d gotten the call, so he hadn’t been able to see me before I went in for surgery.

But he had been there when I’d woken up; by my beside and holding my hand despite the drip that had been shoved into it.

He had insisted on staying by my side for the day that I was laid up in bed, recovering from the surgery. I knew it must have been dreadfully boring for him, watching me sleep all day, but he never complained.

A few months ago, when I’d been approved for the transplant, I’d been lying in bed with Kit, too lost in my own thoughts to pay attention to the outside world. It took Kit placing a kiss on my forehead to bring me out of my thoughts, “Are you ok?” he asked, “You’ve been really quiet ever since you got that phone call from your doctor.”

“I’m just thinking.” I told him, still distracted.

“About the prospect of being able to see again?” he asked.

“Yes but more, what I want to see.” I said slowly, choosing my words carefully.

“Got anything in mind?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. You should make a list.” He advised, rubbing my shoulder soothingly.

I was quiet for a moment as I thought about how to phrase my next question. I wondered, vaguely if he would be frightened by my request. It was quite a meaningful gesture and I wasn’t sure Kit was ready for that. But it was so important to me that I decided the best tact was just to take the plunge and ask him.

“Kit,” I began after a brief silence.

“Hmm?”

“I want you to be there. I want you to be the first thing I see.” I said seriously.

There. I’d done it. It was somewhat of a relief to finally give voice to something I had been wanting ever since the prospect of getting my eyesight back had been presented to me. But that relief was quickly replaced with anxiety as I waited for Kit’s answer.

“Are you serious?” he asked after a moment.

Not trusting myself to speak, I simply nodded.

“I’d be honoured.” He said seriously before he leaned down and pressed his lips to mine.

And now, that moment had arrived.

I sat on the edge of my bed, clutching Kit’s hand tightly as the Doctor stood behind me, unwrapping my bandages.

A few moments before he had pulled the blinds down to make the room a litter darker as he said my eyes would need time to adjust to light. I barely heard him as I sat practically bouncing on my bed with impatience. I had waited years for this moment and now that it was finally here I felt, nervous, excited and afraid all at the same time. There was a whirlpool of emotions in my stomach, that made me feel nauseous. I couldn’t concentrate on just one emotion, there were too many!

I was excited obviously because I would be able to see again! My life would be so much easier now. I could be just like everyone else, something that had never really bothered me until I was faced with the prospect of actually being normal, I never realized how much I wanted it.

Then I was scared. It had been a long time since I had seen the world and I was scared as to what it would look like. What if I didn’t like what it looked like? What if I became too overwhelmed with seeing everything and couldn’t cope?

In signing up for the transplant I had to undergo a mental evaluation and I had read many accounts of people that now walked around with their eyes closed because they couldn’t cope with being able to see so much. They preferred the simplicity that the blackness of being blind provided….

I couldn’t think. I couldn’t concentrate. The moment was here and I wasn’t sure what to feel.

“Alright Gertrude, keep your eyes closed for a moment.” Said the doctor as he unwrapped the bandages from my head.

I tried to focus on my breathing as Kit gave my hand a reassuring squeeze.

The last bandage was off my face and the world was open to me, all I had to do was open my eyes…

“Ok, Gertrude, when you’re ready, you can open your eyes.” Said the doctor.

This was it.

Taking a deep breath, I opened my eyes.

At first I saw only but then shapes began to appear and move in the darkness. Colour started seeping in that the shapes grew more defined, not as blurry. Then before I knew it there was a face before me.

The face belonged to a man, he had dark curly hair that seemed a little too long for a guy. He had a dark shadow of facial hair along his jaw line and above his lips, which were full and luscious. The bottom lip was a little too full to match the top lip, which curved up into two perfect peaks under his nose.

His brown eyes were watching me with such intensity that I was taken aback for a moment.

Then suddenly, Kit’s voice came out of his mouth, “Can you see me?” he asked curiously.

Kit. The man in front of me was Kit.

I blinked several times to make sure I was truly seeing what I was seeing. Curiously I noticed that the image of Kit I had conjured up in my head was remarkably similar to the man in front of me. Except for one thing…

“Huh.” I said in thought.

“What?” Kit demanded, his voice tight with anxiety as something that could have been fear crossed his features.

“I always thought you had red hair.” I told him simply.

And then he smiled an absolutely breath takingly handsome smile and I knew I had made the right choice in choosing him to be the first thing I saw. Nothing could have been more pleasing to behold than his smile.

#chapters #fanfiction #fanfic #real person fanfiction #love is blind #Kit Harington #eyes #The End

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lycanrox · 8 years ago

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response to aidens post lol

Thanks for forcing me into a relationship and making me fall for you because of your temporary affection if-Tearing me apart internally when I KNEW I was not good enough, when I KNEW we were not going to last because you always had someone better. You gave me false hope and tore me up and used my body just for you to help you out. gonna copy nd paste then post my response ok cool

-Guilt trip and gaslight when you thought I was going to get with someone else, people making compliments towards me got you into a rage fit. You never apologized for always getting pissed when I never did shit and you take compliments all the time.

i never tried to guilt trip. i told you many times its ok to get with someone else. you literally dated someone else and i was ok with it. it wasnt compliments i was upset over, you literally had people saying they were in love with you. thats really weird to me. i was scared to be abandoned. people dont compliment me, all i have is my boyfriend and my qpp. maybe my close friends compliment me but its not a big deal. did i freak out over ur friends calling u daddy and shit? why should u get upset over people doing that to me?

-Manipulating everyone to know only your side, ignoring my sincere apologies, calling them bullshit, ignoring the fact that I never did those things again and told you to call me out. You barely did, but I did always stop when you told me to.

literally i already said. He sat there with me as youd text me and fight with me. you went to Her, my fp, to complain about me without telling her my side. everyone who ive talked to has seen all of it. i give people my phone and let them read everything since even before we broke up. im not scared to show my side.

-Controlling me, telling me to do everything and give you love all the time and you literally did that all the time. “I hate myself I want to die”, was that not manipulation, when I always try to comfort you? But, you pushed me away and said you never asked. I was extremely supportive in your times of misery and self harm, what have you ever done for me?

how did i control you? i didnt tell you to do shit. saying “love me” as a joke isnt controlling. i wanted attention, god forbid. you do the same to me. “i hate myself i want to die” is literally just me self loathing, how is that manipulation??? i was venting to you because i trust you. i appreciated the comfort but yes i never wanted help. help is not what i want, i dont want to be in the hospital, i dont want to be put on new meds, i dont want a support group i just want to feel less alone.

-Calling me abusive for literally nothing, for “months” I have apparently abused you when A) I never fucking harmed you, a gentle push I guess which I thoroughly apologized for, but nah it’s all bullshit according to you and B) You have done manipulative and abusive things to me like: Forcing me to do things with you, making me have to kiss you within the first 5 days because you were so sad, trying to talk sexually to me when I was not ready but I got into it because that is what YOU wanted, exhausting my limits to how much you wanted from me, expecting me to love on you and care for you when you are always talking about how many feelings you have for someone else, putting me into a poly relationship without my consent the second time, always having some shit to complain about because I cannot be perfect, pinning me against my friends, and the list goes on.

if like 10 different people are calling you abusive its probably true, dude. you did harm me. you ignored the fact i literally said you punched me. you never apologized for that. i was fucking upset over it and you just sat there and watchd me tear up and curl in a ball. you tried to fucking excuse yourself for it. “I deal with things irrationally, I live in a family that physically hits each other, and it was a blur I cannot just stop and think. I did not blame him for being scared? I said it isn’t my fault and it doesn’t mean I havent gone through things either.” literal quote from you. “...it was aggressive but gentle...” another literal quote.

i never forced you to. in fact it was always you texting me about how horny you are, you made an nsfw blog so i could see the shit you put on there, you were the first person to make sexual advances. i told you i get sex repulsed sometimes and you apparently dont even remember that because at least 3 times a week you talked to me about being horny and what was i supposed to do? you would be at my house and tell me how much you wanted to fuck, you said literally “i cant wait for after-prom sex” and i didnt let you stay the night because of that. you were the one who always wanted sex. i never forced you to do anything, you were the one who touched me without consent. i didnt make you kiss me. before we were even dating you talked about kissing me all the time. you asked me to teach you how to kiss, so yeah like .. 5 days after we started dating you spent the night and we kissed like 3 times. it wasnt that big of a deal. you asked for it. the first time we sexually talked all i said was i wanted to give you hickeys and you asked to sext, so we did.

poly relationship w/o consent? when we first started dating i was already dating oliver. when we broke up, again, i was dating oliver so when you ASKED ME OUT again you knew i was still with them. no force. when did i ever pin you against your friends? the only person i ever said shit abt was p**** because he was getting too obsessive when you were uncomfy, and you encouraged me to do that.

-You made me believe that all I was ever doing was WRONG, and I have told you that five trillion times, and you never did anything to help that. I know I was not wrong for trying to be supportive even though I was triggered to death, but you made me feel like I was a fucking nuisance in your life.

how??? i did everything i could to tell you how great of a boyfriend you were. i told you every day how much i loved you. how perfect you were. i didnt do shit, you were the one who made me feel like shit every day because i wasnt physically or mentally able to suit your romantic needs.

-Blaming me for all your damn mistakes, I got defensive because it was never me, blaming me for being paranoid when you did things and hinted at things to provoke that, and your paranoia was never apologized for either. Even in the beginning, I apologized for being paranoid and it took a long ass time for that to come back because you are so unpredictable and you were never clear with any of the things you said.

yes i admit i have trouble owning up to my own mistakes. im sorry that i blamed you for things. you dont deserve that. im mature enough to own up and apologize for that. i dont know what i did to make you paranoid but im sorry that that happened. i am unpredictable. i know. yikes at me

-Vaguely saying you did some things wrong too but hiding behind your illnesses as well, not even asking me what you could have done better. You want the cold hard truth? You are getting it. Yes, I was supportive of what you had and I guess I am ableist for trying to help you to change. I WAS SO ABLEIST for wanting the absolute bare minimum. You already said we were just becoming friends at that stage, and the fact of the matter is, you hurt the shit out of me.

i try not to hide behind my illnesses but i really cant help some things because of my illnesses. i tried asking what i could do. i tried doing what you wanted. you are ableist tbqh because i told you i COULDNT DO THE THINGS YOU WANTED but you pushed me every day to fucking do it and when i broke down and apoligzed for not being able to do it you made me feel like ABSOLUTE SHIT!!! i was the worst bf ever bc i cant do some romantic things sometimes!!!!! yikes im so problematic for being disabled!!

-You become avoidant to self harm and don’t fucking apologize for pushing people away. You always told me you were here for me when I needed help but you never actually listened to me. I never jumped straight into things, sorry if you believe that. I always said I was feeling terrible and you decided to expand.

i dont have to apologize for pushing people away if its whats best for me mentally. i am 100% sure in that. i always ask whats wrong because i care about you but when i dont know what youre going to say its a 50/50 chance ill get triggered and if im triggered i cant really think properly!! i get flashbacks and anxiety attacks when i see even specfic words. ive told you before its not great to depend on me for that stuff. that im always here for you but im here to listen, not to help. i cant help myself, how can i help you?

-Saying you were fine all the time, lying to me when something was wrong, I always had to find out from someone else about what you have done.

wow yikes i didnt tell you when i felt shitty because i didnt want to trigger you. yikes because i dont want your help or advice sometimes. i want people to listen but you never JSUT listen you have some styff to say and while some ppl like that i dont!! i dont like being told how to think or feel or what to do

-Abusing your medications and getting high when I first broke up with you, saying you got dumped, implying you didn’t deserve it when you never deserved me. I spent over $200 dollars on your boyfriend’s medical bills, but I am careless and unkind I suppose.

i was already abusing my medications :-/ i never called you careless or unkind but ok

-Tearing me apart internally when I KNEW I was not good enough, when I KNEW we were not going to last because you always had someone better. You gave me false hope and tore me up and used my body just for you to help you out.

what did i ever do to make you feel not good enough lol. not do the things i said before i cant do? i didnt use your body, not once not ever. dont even start that shit. you know my history of rape and sexual abuse. what the actual fuck.

-Again, since you cannot get it through your selfish mind, you never owned up for ANYTHING you have done, and guess what? I only do what people do to me. So, you treating me bad, I tried to forgive you and become collected, but you pushed me to where I thought I was stuck in the relationship. Why? Because if I left, you would become suicidal, if you left, you would want to come back immediately.

i tried owning up to things and ive apologized for many things i shouldnt have had to. tbqh ive wanted to break up since like.. right after prom bc the way you were being so i wouldnt have been suicidal if you left. yeah i wouldve been upset if i left because its hard for me to detach myself from people

You have no idea what you did, you have no idea what you were doing.

lol u rite

People defending your disgusting actions are no better than you are, you only exclude what you have done to make yourself seem innocent.

people excusing you for hitting me and sexually abusing me and manipulating and gaslighting me are worse than people supporting me. i was maybe bad to you to combat myself from you hurting me!! i dont want to fucking get hurt again so when you do something shitty i have to do something shitty in return!

Thanks for forcing me into a relationship and making me fall for you because of your temporary affection

you asked me out both times.

I asked you all the damn time if you wanted space, but you said “No, it’s fine,” when you damn well knew it wasn’t. Why are you such a blatant liar?

i didnt want to hurt you by leaving you alone.

Oh and also, when you “broke up” with your boyfriend of two years for me, but always texting endearing things to them when we were together, how cute of you to do that.

we did break up. yeah i fucking missed them though. its hard for me to detach. but i wasnt seeing them behind your back. you know very well it was sho who was dating oliver, not me. i text them endearing things because theyre my fp/dp and i love them.

anything abusive ive done i literally didnt mean to do. youre the one whos just now pushing all this shit on me. dont accuse me of being abusive when you didnt tell me when these things made you upset. i didnt fucking know. i cant read minds. i cant do any of that shit. i also dont have empathy and cant think of other peoples emotions so its hard for me to think about how/if my actions are affecting people, unless they fuckign tell me. which you didnt. instead, you just told me how fucking shitty i was. i was an awful boyfriend, im using you, im cheating, im not good enough, i cant satisfy you. i guess i was so bad you just had to start dating that other guy, and as you said, because “he can give you things i cannot give”. jeez im so FUCKING sorry.

#self harm 0542 #abuse 35959 #rape 43592 #ask to tag

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theforestwarden · 8 years ago

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I didn’t know that I was starving (till I tasted you) | Molly & Forest

Flashback depicting the marvelous date between Forest and @scribeswhocode that happened on 2/14/17 that I know you all want to know about ;)

“Hey keep them closed Missy” Forest chided as he guided Molly into the apartment his entire body practically buzzing. He’d been so anxious about this night he was running on like 4 hours of sleep, but everything was going so well now that the anxiety had turned into excitement. “Alright. Now you can open!” He said sweeping his arm out towards the dining room. He’d put everything out just before he left, the completely 100 percent Kosher vegetable lasagne salad and garlic bread all spread on the table, next to the beautiful center piece of tiny christmas lights and flowers and from one of the plants in his room.

More than anything else, Molly had spent the majority of the day stressing about what to wear. After receiving the message from Forest and then receiving his gifts, Molly had left work early to head straight home and try to pick out her outfit before deciding nothing was right and going out to buy an entirely new one. She felt like her usual floral dresses and sweaters weren't quite enough for this. Two hours later and Molly was back at her apartment, finishing getting ready while she waited for Forest to show up. She had bought a long sleeved red t-shirt dress that went down just below her thighs and a pair of new short high heeled boots that were ridiculously uncomfortable because she hadn't had time to break them in. She was trying to give be different this time around, so she bought a black choker and applied a little more eyeliner than usual. Instead of straightening her hair or tying it into a bun as usual she tried to curl it lightly and let the waves fall more naturally. When Forest showed up she thanked him for the gifts before realizing that there were even more in the car. What the heck was she supposed to do on his birthday? After the ride her eyes were being covered as she was lead into the apartment and into the dining room where her vision was restored and she could see just how beautiful the place was set up. "Holy- Oh my- This is incredible. Truly. Wow." She spun in a circle around the room, taking in the whole thing before settling back on Forest. "Wow. Thank you so much

Beaming slightly, his cheeks now the same color as his new little red bow tie (yes he bought one thing for himself in all of this planning because he always wanted a science nerd red bow tie) Forest tried to shake off the praise. “It’s no problem,” he said walking over to the table and proceeding to pull out her chair for her “I mean it’s not everyday you’ve got to celebrate a holiday and a birthday at once.” Because it wasn’t. Molly was the first person he knew who had one on a major holiday, and well he guessed he just wanted to make sure their first valentine's was special, as well as her birthday, and their first date. Even if it all happened to be rolled into one. Smoothing his navy blazer down over his button down though Forest waited for Molly to sit, mouth watering over all the food in front of him. And he’d be lying if he said he didn’t sample some of it, but he’d also skipped lunch to make it so all of that started canceling each other out. “And like I said in my invitation everything is Kosher” He winked at her.

Molly was laughing as she sat down in the chair and waited for Forest to do the same before she started filling up her plate with food. She had never doubted that Forest would remember that she could only eat Kosher food. "Well don't worry you're doing great." Molly smiled widely at him, "Besides I've never really counted Valentines day as a real holiday anyways." Granted, she had never had a boyfriend before either which could have had something to do with that. Once her plate was completely filled she started digging in and had to pause to just savor the moment. She knew Forest was a good cook, so it really shouldn't have surprised her buy just how good it all was. "This is freaking delicious."

Smiling silently to himself at Molly’s praise Forest piled his plate high with food after his girlfriend, happy that there was still a little steam coming off the lasagne. He had nothing to judge this off of so he was reviled that he wasn’t letting her down. “I mean i can see the commercialization of it, but I don’t know. I’ve always loved love so any excuse to celebrate that to me is worth it.” Forest replied before taking a bite of food. Molly was right it was pretty good, especially since he made it differently than he usually did. “Thanks.” Forest blushed. With all the praise, and well just his unbelievably breathtaking girlfriend sitting next to him, he was probably just going to have to get used to wearing a permanent blush on this date “I mean it wasn’t that hard of a recipe.” He continued shaking it off a little “I can give it to you if you want.”

Between bites of food, Molly feared talking with her mouth full so she tried to keep conversation to the bare minimum. The last thing she needed was to embarrass herself on this date. Not that Forest would even care, because she knew that he wouldn't. He would probably just laugh it off with her and go on with his night as if nothing had happened. It wasn't like Molly's face could get any more red than Forest's already was tonight. "I get the point of it. Both points. The capitalism and the love part. I think it's important for first time couples to celebrate it. I just think if you're like three years into a marriage and still worried about getting your wife flowers or else she will get mad at you then something is wrong." Molly found herself going on the rant before she could realize that now, on a date during Valentine's day probably wasn't the time to speak of her disdain for the holiday. She was so used to being that moody lonely kid hating Valentines day not only because she was single, but also because it took the attention away from her birthday. "And now is not the time for that at all." Molly laughed and stuffed her face with more food before she made a bigger full of herself. At the thought of the recipe, Molly just gave a thumbs up until she was done chewing. "Or I can make you cook it again and help you so I learn how to make it. Like a couple thing. Where I get food."

Nodding Forest took a sip of his water, trying to make everything in the woefully normal glass last as long as it would in his big cup. Because he wasn’t a Leshy tonight ok. He was just a normal guy on a normal date with his beautiful and normal Jewish girlfriend. “Yea. I mean like I said” He continued placing his fork down for a moment “I think if you’re celebrating love in your own way, that’s the true meaning of the holiday. If you’re just buying overpriced flowers and candy because you think its expected, then that’s when it’s a problem” Wiping at his mouth with his napkin however Forest was a bit relieved when she changed the subject to something more cheerful. Like mooching food off of your ever dutiful boyfriend. “I’m sensing the beginning of a trend here” Forest smirked as he lifted another forkful to his mouth. It was more of a tease than anything serious and he hoped it showed. Because he literally would cook Molly anything she wanted if it meant he simply got to spend time with her. “But I’ll let it slide seeing as how I like to cook, and you like to eat. It’s a win win all around” He winked at her again.

Molly nodded her head in agreement with what Forest was saying, mostly because she had no interest in going back to the subject of Valentine's day on Valentine's day. It was oddly depressing. Of course the Holiday was based on a guy getting beheaded for marrying people, so apparently the rest of the world used to think about love the same way Molly would like to think she used to. She knew that she had always been a hopeless romantic, but had no interest in admitting that. "It's totally your fault for admitting that you like to cook and then agreeing to date a girl you know is ridiculously hopeless at it. So I don't feel bad for you at all." She decidedly cut it off by taking a dramatic bite into her food and giving a wide smile at him.

Scoffing slightly at her words Forest chewed the bite of lasagna he had just taken shaking his head in the process. She’d gotten this far in life so Forest had to figure she was probably able to cook more than she was letting on. But he liked this banter between them now, and the more they hung out together the easier it seemed to fall off of his lips. “You going to fix all my computer problems then?” Forest questioned mirroring her smile. “Because if i’m going to cook for you it’s only fair you save me from the technology I don’t understand” He waved his fork at her teasingly, glad that they could not tease each other like this. I mean it wasn’t that they hadn’t been able to tease each other before but now. Now it seemed more appropriate. More loving. Now it seemed as if, well they didn’t have to hold back bits and pieces or something. They could just be Molly and Forest. Molly and Forest in love.

Molly groaned sarcastically, the smile never leaving her face. "That is totally unfair." She crossed her arms to pout like a seven year old child and feigned anger. "All you have to do is make good food and you're asking me to work miracles? I think I'm really getting the short end of the stick here." It was mostly a joke. After all, Forest wasn't a complete lost cause when it came to technology. Mostly. He at least knew how to turn a laptop on and find the internet browser and he had caught onto Mario Kart quick enough.

“Is it though?” Forest replied with a twinkle in his eye. Yea teaching him about technology might be a little bit more of a feat than him simply cooking for Molly, but hey, who doesn’t like a good challenge. Plus he was starting to get that whole Mario Kart thing. “And it’s only the short end of the stick if I start beating you at your own game.” He smirked at her before shoving another large bite in his mouth. Chewing and swallowing though Forest placed his fork down for a few seconds patting at his mouth with his napkin “So how was your day?” He asked genuinely interested in how her birthday had gone for her.

Molly couldn't help but laugh at the thought of Forest actually rising above the challenge and beating her at anything that involved technology. "Yeah, Sure Jan." Molly joked at him. Forest probably didn't even know the sure Jan meme, and yet he was trying to say he would beat Molly at her own game some day. Ha. Cute sentiment from the tree boy. "I'll believe that when I see it." Molly was pleasantly surprised that she could be happy about her birthday. Her birthday on Valentine's day had always been somewhat of a sore spot, but she never actually cared much because she spent it with her family. This year, she was expecting things to be much worse than they actually were. "It was fantastic. I spent it working and then with Bridget and now with you. Can't complain too much. How about you?"

Looking a her Forest raised a single confused eyebrow. He was used to references going over his head but this one seemed like something he should know. Especially if Molly knew it! But going about with another mouthful Forest shrugged it off, figuring Molly would either explain or just let it go too. “And you will see it” He replied “i’ve been practicing!” Because he had been, at least with Mario Kart, and his laptop, and phone. So there were at least a couple things he would be able to do better! Hopefully. Maybe one day. Chuckling softly at his own technological ineptitude though Forest shook it off figuring this was one battle would probably never win and instead when about detailing what he did during his day today. “School, a smidge of work, and then cooking so pretty good myself” He smiled softly at Molly before breaking the eye contact to go back to eating. Swallowing his current forkful of Lasagna though he asked the question that be burning in his mind since he woke up today “Any good presents today besides mine?” He was grinning at her now.

"Bridget made me some super cute cupcakes" Molly smiled. She had had a few at work but the rest were all sitting on her counter at the apartment, "I'll let you try one when you come over next." If she didn't eat them all first. She rarely kept any food in her fridge that could be considered real food, so those cupcakes might have to play breakfast every now and again. As she was finishing up her food she asked Forest curiously, "So what's next after dinner?"

“Aww that’s nice” Forest replied smiling. He was happy that some of Molly’s friends did something for her too. Just so she had more than one person in her corner on her special day. “But yea. I’ll have to try one, if they aren’t gone by the time i get ther” He winked at Molly. He’d seen the inside of her fridge a few times, so he knew that she was not always the best eater in town. He’d have to set a reminder to cook for her more so she got something nutritious and filling every once and awhile. Waving his fork around slightly as she asked what was next forest tried to keep himself casual. “Well I guess that’s up to you. Like I said I’ve got lots of things we could do, like lounge in a wonderful pillow fort for instance” He grinned over at her. “But first we’ll have to get the cake and sing Happy birthday! Can’t forget that.”

"I can probably save one for you at least" Molly smiled, happy that the two were basically thinking the same thing. Even if the thoughts they had were usually at Molly's expense. Should she be happy or embarrassed that the two of them were both thinking the same thing about Molly's awful diet? "A pillow fort? Yes yes yes please. I love pillow forts!" She was getting a bit too excited about the pillow fort probably, but luckily the idea of Forest singing to her was enough to calm her down a bit at least. "Oh no. No singing happy birthday. I hate it enough in crowded restaurants I don't need you singing it to me. Plus, I'm the singer of the two of us. The only song that is acceptable for you to sing is Color of the Wind." She laughed at her own joke. Color of the Wind. Good one.

“I’ll take that.” Forest replied with a nod “Though if it’s between you not eating breakfast or something and me getting a cupcake, take the cupcake” Because he literally would not be upset at all. He just wanted Molly to eat. Sensing how excited she was about the pillow fort though Forest blushed a bit, he didn’t know shes be that into it, but it was nice. “Well if you’re this excited about a pillow fort, wait till you see what’s inside” Because oh yea she was probably going to flip when she say the laraoke machine. “Sorry, but its already decided” He put his hands on the table when she mentioned that she didn’t want him singing happy birthday, “you are getting an off key rendition of Happy Birthday. And then possibly Listen to Your Heart, because Grandmother Willow just understands me ok.” Forest replied with a grin, happy that he actually got the reference. I mean he hoped she was referencing Pocahontas, which one of the few disney movies he was actually able to watch during his childhood.

Molly scratched at her head, already embarrassed for Forest's singing before he even had the chance to do it. Was it possible to die of embarrassment for someone else? She supposed she was about to find out. "Listen to your Heart is totally acceptable. It's a great song." She skipped over the part about not eating breakfast, the less she talked to people about that the better. She disliked the idea of people feeling bad for her. Considering it was so easy to feel bad for her right now, she usually just chose to neglect sharing information that she felt was especially embarrassing to preserve everyone's sanity. She could argue with somebody all day against their pity, which wasn't productive to any party involved. "Okay. Well let's get it over with. Bring it on."

“Good because that is what I will be singing” Forest nodded, hoping the karaoke machine had a full range of disney medleys on there, as there was no way he was singing acapella. Plus he was sure Molly would want to use it straight away. So he and grandmother Willow could help break it in. Wiping his mouth through for the last time though Forest sighed “Well if the lady doth commands”, he said getting up from his spot with a grin “Anyways I will be right back with your cake so you better not dine and dash on me” He stuck out his tongue at her before disappearing into the kitchen for a couple of minutes a small home made cake with Molly’s favorite frosting and ablaze with candles in his hands upon his return.

Molly felt like she could finally take a breath when Forest left the dining room to grab the cake. She couldn't quite pin down why it was that she felt so nervous about all of this. Maybe it was just because it was her first real romantic date. Although she never figured that she would be as comfortable around her boyfriend as she was around Forest. Maybe because the two were best friends first. Everything to her was very confusing about her dating life. She also never thought that she would be the less awkward of the two, but here Forest was adorably fumbling through the date so nervous and cute. Speaking of him, he came back from the kitchen a few moments later holding the cake with the candles lit on top of it and Molly clapped her hands and smiled while she prepared herself to hear Forest attempt to sing happy birthday to her.

Standing there watching Molly smile Forest couldn’t help but grin himself the sheer joy of doing something for his girlfriend, his best friend, giving him well, Joy. Placing the cake on the table Forest pulled out a party hat from his back pocket slipping it easily over his own head (because he wasn’t about to ruin his girlfriend's hair,no sir) just waiting for Molly’s reaction. “Happy brithday to yooouuuu” he started to sing in his worst off key rendition he could “hApppyy Birthday to youuuu. Happpyyy birthday dear themostbeautfiulgirlintheworld Mollyyyyyyyy. Happy Birthday too yoooouuuuuuuu” Ending on high note Forest did a few jazz hands as we waited for her to blow out her candle and make a wish.

Molly sat smiling through the pain of Forest singing, knowing that he was purposely singing even worse than usual just to spite Molly and make her suffer. Despite that it made her smile even more because of it. So she smiled and laughed through the entirety of that awful, awful singing and afterwards she sat for a long moment and closed her eyes to make herself think of a wish. Or if nothing came to her like usual she could at least make it look like she was wishing for something. But this time a wish came quickly. And all she wanted was for some sign that everything was going to be okay. She blew the candles out and peaked one eye open. Looking up at Forest was the first sign that things would be. After he set the cake down is when Molly pushed off of the chair and forward to kiss him.

Watching Molly sitting there laughing and smiling Forest just beamed proud of himself. It was safe to say he’d never done anything like this for anyone ever and it was wonderful to know he was doing something right for someone that had become so special to him. Something real right, because the second he set down the cake Molly lips were on him. And naturally Forest froze every sense in his body over stimulated with the weight of two soft petals pressed against his mouth. Because this was, this was a lot to take in. Their first intimate gesture and he was stuck there like a deer in the headlights, cheeks slowly becoming more and more scarlet by the minute and his brain feeling like it was on fire every second Molly was this close to him. But the funny thing was now that Forest had this, he never wanted to stop. Ever. He didn’t need to breath right? Like carbon dioxide was for chumps right? Putting his hand along her waist Forest held himself there not really knowing what to do but figuring he’d follow Molly’s lead, lettering her pull away first. Standing there looking at her though Forest realized that he didn’t know how to continue now. He didn;t know how to be normal now that he’d shared something like this with Molly. But he knew he had to do something. “So t-this was to get me to s-s-hut up wasn’t it” Forest stuttered out not knowing what else to say but figuring trying to joke about you know HIS FIRST KISS would just make everything way way less awkward.

Molly pulled away from Forest possibly more shocked than the state he seemed to be in, which was really saying something. "Wow. Okay. So I just did that." She spoke aloud, to her own personal horror. The thought had been screaming through her head amid the entire kiss, but up until this moment her lips were a little busy. Now apparently anything was fair game and she was entirely too nervous about that. "How'd you know?" Molly laughed nervously, thankful for the joke and anxious that the kiss was going to become the center of attention. She didn't know enough about relationships to know if that was the right or wrong thing to do. "So about that pillow fort!" She blurted out suddenly and did a 180, ready to head towards Forest's bedroom, "I gotta see the masterpiece."

“Yea” Forest breathed out as he started to come to not even really registering that it was something that had happened to him. Because no one kissed him, ever. Well except his mother. Once. On the forehead. But this, yea well this was so much better than that. As it should be. Taking a few more deep breaths Forest blushed a little grinning at his horrible attempt at a joke. “Well I-I guess that’s one way to do it. Possibly my new p-preferred method” He shrugged slightly at the thought. Watching her though almost blot out of the room Forest pushed his feelings down, knowing that something else needed his attention now. “Molly” Forest chided, reaching out for her hand. He could tell she was nervous. But she needn’t be, she would never be able to do anything wrong in Forest’s eyes. OK well that was a lie, but there was a laundry list of things that she could do that he’d be ok with and kissing him was definitely on the top of that list. “You don’t have to run out of the room you know,” He was smiling now hoping that a return to normal would help signal that everything was still ok between them, “Because contrary to popular beleif the pillows will in fact wait for you.”

"Will they wait for me? I don't have any proof" Molly laughed nervously and wasn't sure if she would ever be able to laugh normally again. Not at the rate she was going. She wasn't the type to do something like that. She always figured that whoever she dated would have to lead her when it came to relationships. Then again she also never thought that she would be the type to do any of the other crazy stuff she had done since moving to Ashkent Creek. "Sorry. I'm just... nervous. Nervous is normal right? I think that it's pretty normal. Plus I'm just super excited about this pillow fort." Another nervous laugh, this time paired with her hands reflexively twirling at her hair. At least she wasn't lying when she said that she was excited for the pillow fort.

“Oh so you need proof now?” Forest chuckled trying not to let Molly’s nervousness affect him. I mean was his mind racing from his first kiss? Yes. But like a lot of other things, Forest shoved that to the back for now, and instead focused on trying to make this better for Molly. It was her birthday after all. “Nervous is normal.” Forest nodded as if he actually knew about the subject (which he didn’t) “But I think not being nervous would be the best” Reaching out for her again Forest held his out, urge to interlace their fingers together to quell the nervous energy hitting him harder than it ever had before. Because Molly was his best friend, and even though they were moving into new territory, with dates, and kissing and just, relationship stuff, underneath it all they were still just Forest and Molly. “Shall we?” he asked quietly.

Molly grabbed onto Forest's hand, careful not to squeeze too tightly despite how nervous she was about the situation. "Lead the way kind sir" As if she had no idea which bedroom was his. She followed Forest through the hallway and closed her eyes as the door swung open, wanting to see the entire fort all at once instead of seeing it swing into view obscured by his bedroom door. She gasped and jumped into the air excitedly when she saw it. "This is amazing! I feel like I'm twelve years old again!" She clapped her hands together and turned to Forest and wrapped him in a tight hug, "You crushed it. Seriously." She whispered to him before stepping into his room. "Aren't you going to give me the tour?" Despite all the reservations and emotions she had felt this morning knowing it was her first birthday without her family, times like these reminded her that she would be okay here in Ashkent Creek.

#touchofchatzy #scribeswhocode #chatzy #//so so late #BUT WE'RE POSTING ANYWAYS #XD

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