#listened to 'start again' by gabrielle aplin while writing!

[clare-with-no-i]

Lily asks him one day:

Why did it take you so long to say ‘I love you’ back?

Nerves, James replies with a shrug, and it’s only a little bit the truth, but he doesn’t know how to put the rest of it into words.

For him, the early stage of their relationship was made of equal parts excitement and fear.  In the first two months, he made sure only to hold her hand in intervals of five minutes or less, lest his palms clam up and expose the tremulous stammer of his heartbeat, the lightning bolt of awe that straightened his spine when she sidled up to him and said I missed you earlier.  He offered to carry her books only when they seemed too heavy; not every day, because he knew she didn’t want that, because she could do it herself, thanks very much. He learned her favorite book was Pride and Prejudice.  He did not buy her a first-edition copy of it, though, because that would be expensive, even though he wanted to and he could afford it.

The fear wasn’t because of anything she did—or he did, really.  It was just that he loved her so much and here she was, in front of him, real and happy and saying I’m so glad you’re my boyfriend, and he’d thought before that he knew how hard it was to love her from afar, but now, up-close, the thought of ever doing so again made his insides twist like someone was gripping them in a vice.  

Why do people love this much, he would think, when it means we could know what it feels to lose it?

Not that he thinks he will.  He didn’t in those early months, either.  But he spent years doodling her initials on his exam papers and hoping the professors wouldn’t know what they meant, hoping no one would ever find out about his crush, because Lily Evans did not like him, and trying to pretend like he had a cool shot in Hell was nothing but a fool’s errand.

Those wounds are closed now, but some scar tissues never fully heal, and even phantom limbs ache in the rain.  So, even when she said I love you for the first time only three months after they went on their first date, the fireworks of his jubilation fizzled into this same fear, and his throat closed up when he tried to say it back.

He didn’t want her to remember how he used to be, how she used to feel.  He felt the insecurity creep up his esophagus and sit on the back of his tongue, heavy and acidic.  How could he make sure she was happy? How could he be assured that he was good enough, worthy enough?

I know that my jokes give you joy, he’d think, but I don’t know if my love would.

So every time felt the urge to say it, he’d make her laugh instead, and in her laugh, he saw his I love you—it rested in the crinkles around her eyes, rode the curve of her lips to the high points of her cheekbones.  It shone in the sparkle of her iris.  I love you, I love you, I love you. I want to see you laugh forever.

It was easy, practiced; he’d spent years attuning to her mind, trying to figure her out.  He knew how to make her laugh like he knew how to cast a spell.  

It took him another month after that to finally build up the confidence. A month of settling into himself, letting moments pass in silence, trying to let himself make mistakes and think that he might be able to recover.  Lily helped him, too, of course.

I don’t want you to be perfect, she said one day in February of their seventh year, I want you to be yourself.

I love you, he responded, because the relief was so acute that he couldn’t stop himself even if he wanted to.

But James can’t possibly explain all of that to her now—can’t possibly tell her that he had said I love you, in fact, even before she said it herself.  He’d been saying it for months, for years, maybe before he knew it himself, maybe before anyone else knew, maybe in every moment in between.  

He sticks with his simple answer: nerves.

Lily laughs because she doesn’t believe him, because who on earth could ever make James Potter nervous? But he just shrugs again.

Everyone gets nervous about something, he says, and puts his arm around her shoulder with a smile. But it always goes away after a while.

[alastaircarstairsdefenselawyer]

romeo must die

this one-shot is based on the song Romeo Must Die by Gabrielle Aplin, I highly recommend listening to it! shout out to @eugeniaslongsword for introducing me to it :) i even borrowed some lyrics from it haha. it is also inspired by the entire playlist I made, "being treated badly by someone doesn't make you love them more"

content warnings: past toxic/unhealthy relationship, the uncomfy 6-year age gap between Alastair and Charles

Masterlist | Read on AO3

"Alastair, may I speak to you privately for a moment?"

Alastair looked up from what he was working on. He was in the library of the Institute, along with Cordelia, Thomas, James, Matthew, and Christopher. They were searching for any clue as to how Lucie had done what she’d done or what Tatiana and Belial were planning. Alastair wasn't entirely sure how he got roped into the ordeal, but it seemed as though Thomas suggested him as an extra set of eyes, and Cordelia latched onto the idea.

"No," he said curtly, returning to his reading.

"Excuse me?"

"I said no. I'm quite busy at the moment." Alastair spoke under his breath, not wanting to draw the others' attention. How many times had Charles barked the same words at him, swatting him away, hacking away at paperwork or planning his next step in his career? The words sat bittersweet in his chest.

"Surely you could spare a few moments."

"I certainly could. But I do not wish to." Charles had a way of getting into his head and twisting his words and his feelings. It was not an experience he wished to revisit. It was better here, with an audience. It had also been easier in the infirmary, knowing that he held all of the power. His father had made him feel the same way, he thought bitterly. He understood now that what he'd done at school was not only to protect himself from the bullies. He wanted to reclaim the power stolen from him by his father; he wanted for once in his life to hold power himself. He hadn't yet come to the realization that holding that kind of power did nothing but harm. It was of no use, anyways, because it didn't matter how much he perfected his tongue and his wit on the other students at the Academy, he was never able to use it when it counted. Not with Elias, and not with Charles.

"It's fine if you need to take a few minutes, Alastair,” Cordelia said gently. All of the eyes in the room had come to rest on the two of them. Now he wished he’d spoken louder.

“It’s alright, Charles was just leaving.”

He had hoped that Charles would give up and leave knowing that everyone was watching him, but he was determined. He grabbed Alastair’s arm. “It’ll just be-”

Alastair stood, but pulled his arm away. “Don’t touch me.”

In a flicker, Alastair saw it: the anxiety began to set in. Charles began to realize that he would not be able to play his usual tricks. “Why are you acting like this?”

“I believe I was quite clear when I told you I don’t wish to speak with you. You’re the one who can’t let this go.”

“Must you act so childish?”

He rolled his eyes. “Must you always call me childish for thinking for myself instead of catering to your every whim?”

“I don’t understand. You said we were fine.”

Alastair sighed. Perhaps for a moment, he thought that was true. For just a second, he thought there was a world where he and Charles could be friends. But Alastair had decided that he would no longer call people who hurt him his friends. “Yes, well, I lied. I wanted to let you down gently, but it’s clear to me now that it must be spelled out for you. How shall I put this? You and I are past our dancing days, Charles.”

“But-” He stammered, searching for words. “What happened with Grace Blackthorn wasn’t my fault.”

“Maybe not. But what of Miss Bridgestock? Am I to pretend that what happened with Miss Blackthorn was not the same as what happened two years earlier?”

“You told me many times that you took no issue with that, that you understood.”

“I understood what you told me, which we both know was never the full truth. I was a sixteen year old desperate for your affections, and the fact that you truly believe I never had any issue with your arrangement is proof that you never genuinely cared about me or listened to my thoughts. I told you in the infirmary that this wasn’t your fault because I thought it’d ease the pain, but I lied. And I don’t have time to sit here and watch you cry over it.”

Alastair wished that watching Charles become flustered would have been more enjoyable. Instead, all he wanted was for this to end. “You- you’re different than when we met. You’ve changed. You’re cruel and callous, I don’t understand how I could not see how heartless you were until now. You are everything that everyone claims you to be. How am I to even know what the truth is when it comes from your lips?”

There was a time when those words would have cut deeply into him, eating at his every insecurity, but Charles mistakenly assumed that Alastair was the same person he was last July, with the same insecurities. “When we met, I was fourteen years old. I’ve grown up, and it is time for you to do the same. It’s been six months, Charles. You need to stop writing me. If that makes me heartless, I don’t care. And if you wish to know the truth, the truth is that the moment you leave here, if I never see your face again, it still will not be long enough.”

Charles stared at him for a long while, unable to find a proper retort. In the end, it was Matthew who stepped in. “Charles, I believe it’s time for you to go.”

He obliged, finally turning to leave the library. As he began to walk away, however, Alastair knew that he was not finished. His heart beat a little bit faster at the thought of such a confession, and faster again when he realized who would hear it, but there was no piece of parting with Charles that he wished to regret.

“Wait,” he said. Charles froze and turned to look at him. “I know it’s unlikely that you have it in the cold depths of your soul to care, but let the record show that I would have given you everything. I would have given you my life, all of the love and trust that I had to give, and then I would have given more. And you gave me nothing. So the next time you’re pondering my heartlessness, you ought to wonder what that means for you.”

Finally satisfied, Alastair did not wait for Charles to turn and leave again to return to his seat and pick his reading back up. He waited for a moment, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of everyone’s eyes on him. He stood once more, opening his mouth to speak, but the words were caught in his throat. Instead, he walked out of the library in silence.

Finding the nearest balcony, he attempted to steady his breath.

“Are you alright?” He heard from behind him. Thomas. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

He shook his head. “I just needed some air.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

Alastair sighed. He backed up against the window and slid down to the floor of the balcony. “I know- I know that everyone sort of knew already, but… by the Angel, I feel so pathetic.”

“You’re not pathetic,” Thomas told him, sitting down beside him.

“You were right, of course you were. I was so… taken with him, back in Paris. I couldn’t see him for what he was. I was so naive, so foolish. I just- After everything I’ve seen, everything I’ve been through, how did I not realize-”

Thomas put his hand on Alastair’s knee. “You wanted to see the best in him. After everything you’d seen and been through, you wanted to believe that there were still good and honest people in the world. And there are. I’m sorry that he was not one of them, but that does not make you foolish or pathetic. It makes you… kind.”

“I bet you’d never imagined describing me as such before.”

“It seems you’re full of surprises,” Thomas teased. “But that’s not true. I always saw the kindness in you, even back at school, when you did everything to keep it hidden.”

“As you can see, my ‘kindness’ has never gotten me very far.”

“You were out of practice. Following me on my reckless nighttime patrols, that was kind. More than kind. I don’t think I ever thanked you for that, for risking your life to protect mine.”

“I didn’t do it for gratitude.”

“And yet I owe you mine nonetheless.”

“I can’t go back in there, you know.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can tolerate you and your friends hating me just fine. But if any of your friends give me even an ounce of pity- well, we’ll see just where the limits of my kindness lie, won’t we?”

Thomas stood up, offering Alastair his hand. “Pity comes from those who cannot even begin to understand what you’ve experienced. For what it’s worth, I don’t think my friends will pity you. But if they do, you can ignore them. For Lucie.”

Alastair sighed and allowed Thomas to pull him to his feet. “Fine. Let’s get back to reading.”

“Speaking of reading, do you have the entirety of Shakespeare’s canon memorized, or only the lines you believe may pop up in conversation?”

“Excuse me?”

“‘For you and I are past our dancing days,’ it’s Romeo and Juliet, isn’t it? It’s the only one of his works that I got through.”

Alastair froze. “You haven’t read Hamlet?”

“I tried.”

“Othello? King Lear? Macbeth? Midsummer Night’s Dream?”

He shook his head.

“That’s impossible. And James is friends with you?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Wait until my sister finds out you haven’t read Hamlet,” he warned, starting towards the library with urgency in his step.

“Wait, don’t- I just don’t like Shakespeare! What’s so wrong with that?” Thomas’ attempts at reasoning were futile, however, a welcome distraction from all of their recent sorrows finally taking hold.

Thanks for reading!! This was self indulgent af lol. I'm not to sure whether some people only wanted to be tagged in my social media AU, so if that's the case I'm sorry & please tell me!: @stxr-thxif @chaos-and-starlight @lifewouldbebetteronmars @littlx-songbxrd @dianasarrow @eugeniaslongsword @bookswitchcraftandcats @jamesherondaleofficial @thomas-gaypanic-lightwood @livingformyself @anarmorofwords @foxglove-airmid @writeforjordelia @sapphic-in @thecodexsays @fortheloveofthecarstairs @alastair-esfandiyar-carstairs1 @shadowrunner2000 @thewarthatsavedmylife @fair-childd @icouldnotask @shadowhunting-hooligans @melanielocke @clarys-heosphoros @kiwichaeng @lightwoodsimp @thecrimsonsorceresss @theenchanteddreamer @adams-left-hand @yozinha-z @ipromiseiwillwrite @skirtsandsweaters @goodoldfashionednerd

[goforth-ladymidnight]

Hello, it's me I'm the problem your secret santa again!! Your gift is coming along nicely! Today I wanted to ask what song(s) you associate with Tamlin/Briar or/and what are your favorite songs in general 🎅

Hello! ❤️

Before I start this list, let me just say that I'm so, so eager to see the finished piece! *excited hand clapping*

I’m not sure how to describe my taste in music, except “hodgepodge”. I’m one of the rare people in this fandom who is not a “Swiftie”. 😐 I like a handful of her songs, but that tends to be true with most of the artists I listen to, especially the conventionally popular artists. I like a song or two, and that’s about it. (So... Can we still be friends? haha)

On to the list! I went through my YouTube likes, the songs on my phone, Spotify, etc., and here are a handful of songs that feel very Brilin to me.

1. “Can’t Help Falling in Love (With You)”. It’s a simple classic love song, and the lyrics are so perfect. Cliche, maybe, cheesy, sure, but I like it anyway. 🥰 Fun fact, the lyrics were originally written for a woman’s perspective, so the verse: “Shall I stay, Would it be a sin, If I can’t help, Falling in love with him?” was changed when Elvis recorded it. A few of my favorite covers can be found on YouTube, if you want to check them out: Chase Eagleson (male cover); Alyssa Baker (female cover); as well as Boyce Avenue (male cover, also one of my absolute favorite cover artists).

2. “Monster” by Imagine Dragons [for Tamlin]

3. “Fix You” by Coldplay - cover by Alex Goot

4. “Start of Time” by Gabrielle Aplin [for Briar]

5. “Carry You” by Ruelle, Fleurie

Honorable Mention: "Dandelions" by Ruth B. [I've seen this song recommended for both Feylin and Brilin, and while I do like it, it's -obviously- not in my top 5.]

I think that’s a good start. 😊 I have mood/ambient music I listen to for writing, but I thought you might prefer music with words.

You also asked what my favorite songs in general are, so if you’ll indulge me, I will say that my overall vibe lately would probably qualify as Easy Listening. One of my all-time favorite songs that just haunts me is “Wicked Game” as covered by Ursine Vulpine and Annaca. The lyrics would probably fit Feysand better than any other ACOTAR couple, but I discovered it before I joined the fandom, so even though that’s not my favorite ship, I still love the song and replay it often.

Lewis Capaldi is one of the few artists whose work I’ve played on repeat as well, and the covers on YouTube are just as good, especially “Someone You Loved” by Jennel Garcia. Beyond that, Josh Groban, Hayley Westenra, Adele... I seem to prefer Easy Listening to Pop, but like I said, if I like the song, it goes into my collection. Some of the pop artists I still listen to include N*Sync, the Backstreet Boys, and Britney Spears (from my teenage years). In case you couldn’t guess, yes, I was a 90s kid. 😁

I had a lot of fun going through my music. I even found a few oldies but goodies to add to my rotation, so thanks for that. 💞 And thanks for dropping by! As always, my inbox is open. 😊

[daisylincs]

ur secret santa accidentally got a bit too secret this week as i finished up my finals but now i am free!! throw all ur fav fitzsimmons @ hogwarts headcanons my way, big or small, relevant to the prompt or not, i'd love to hear them! and just for fun (& for me to listen to while i work on ur gift), any song(s) that remind u of our fitzsimmons? cant believe we're this close to the end :)

Oh my gosh, hello, Santa! 💜💜 No worries about the secrecy thing, I've been a touch less active myself here, too, and spending my days being spectacularly lazy 😝 Ah, breaks are the BEST, and I'm so glad you've got one now too!

So, hmmm, Fitzsimmons at Hogwarts headcanons, let me see.

Well, first of all, I think that they're both Ravenclaws, with very little question about that? Fitz could maybe be a Gryffindor, maybe, but ultimately I'd say they're both classic Ravenclaw. They'd also both be those Hermione-esque students who are naturally brilliant at magic, and get all the spells right through a combination of homework (high five, Jemma 🤣) and talent.

I also think that Jemma would be made a prefect pretty much as soon as she was old enough - because, come on, she's literally perfect for it. Responsible but still compassionate, and more than smart enough to keep up with her school duties despite having other responsibilities - yup. Fits the bill perfectly!

Fitz, I think, would be more of a wild card prefect-wise, because he's a little shyer and less natural with people, and also if we have Daisy in the story, he's bound to get into some kind of shenanigans with her 🤣😝

Thirdly, and I don't know how relevant this is at all, lol, I'm literally just spamming you with my Hogwarts-y thoughts and ideas here - but I've always thought that, in pretty much any Hogwarts AU, Coulson would make the most PERFECT Dumbledore, and May the best McGonagall. I mean, just. 😍😍😍😍😍

Ohhh, my gosh, and the last thing I LOVE to headcanon is that Fitzsimmons is That Couple who the entire school ships, and wants to get together - best friends, or maybe enemies (! 👀), but either way very much into each other, and very much mutually oblivious about it.

Hmmmhhhmm, that's all I can think of at 8am this morning, and without a cup of tea, no less 🤣😱🤦‍♀️ But if you'd like any more hcs about this, ask again anytime and I'd love to share them! We still have a few days left 😍😍🤣 And, you know, in general - I'd love to talk to you a bit more once this is all over.

Before I go, though, you asked me for some Fitzsimmons songs - and I'll let you in on a secret here, I absolutely can't listen to anything while trying to write, because my musical brain gets distracted with the harmonies and analysis of the song, or... I just start singing along, lmaoo. Case in point: no writing gets done.

So while I don't have a convenient writing playlist to pick from, after having a bit of a think, I've managed to pull together a list of songs that give me the best FS feels. 🥰

You Were Never Gone from Teen Wolf - this song is, and probably always will be, my number one Fitzsimmons song. Even if the lyrics weren't positively perfectly suited to them (which they are) I also saw an AMAZING Fitzsimmons edit on it once, and that now lives rent-free in my head, along with the stirring and fantastic song itself.

Perfect by Ed Sheeran - this song is probably the most romantic love song I've ever heard, and nothing short of perfect (😝) for any OTP.

Birds by Imagine Dragons - getting angstier here, but this song captures the pain of everything Fitz and Jemma have gone through exquisitely well, and how they still keep hoping they'll find each other again.

Work Song by Hozier - c'mon, you can't have a halfway decent playlist without a Hozier song on it, and this one, especially the part where he sings about how no grave can hold him back from his love, just seems very Fitzsimmons to me.

Please Don't Say You Love Me by Gabrielle Aplin - this is one of those songs that make me think of a very specific time period in FS's history; namely, in season 2, when Fitz had confessed his feelings to Jemma, but she isn't sure how she feels yet, and just doesn't want things to change. Also, Iain de Caestecker is in the music video, and, come on, you don't get much better for FS feels than that! 😝😍

No Light, No Light by Florence + the Machine - another time-specific one, and another SUPER angsty one. To me, there's no song that captures post-Framework Fitzsimmons better, especially the part where she sings about no light in his bright blue eyes. 💔

The Scientist by Coldplay - the last one on my list, and maaaaybe a bit of an obvious choice, lmao, but still one that I think fits them regardless. It's full of heartbreak ("no-one ever said it would be this hard") and also the haunting, sincere wish to "Oh, take me back to the start // I was just guessing at numbers and figures // Pulling the puzzles apart // Questions of science, science and progress // Do not speak as loud as my heart." And I'm just like... damn. Everything about it - lyrics, title, tune - just SCREAMS Fitzsimmons, and I love it.

Right, my dear Secret Santa, I hope you liked this somewhat long and rambly, but hopefully very Fitzsimmons-y and wonderful answer! I, too, cannot believe we're this close to the end (and more than a little pleased to meet a fellow procrastinator writing-wise 🤣✋). With a couple more days to go (AHHHHHHHHHHHHH, indeed) HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!! 🥰🥰🥰

[holidaywishes]

It Had To Be You XXXII

Chapter Thirty Two: Start Again

  Summary: "You hadn’t realized how much you’d missed Tyler’s annoying sleeping habits until you hadn’t been around it for a few months. But now that it was back, you laughed when he would wake himself up and roll your eyes when he’d blame you for it all.”

  Warning: I honestly don’t think there’s anything; like not even angst 😮

  Author’s Note: I missed writing about Christmas guys. December was a crazy month and Christmas came and went in the blink of an eye. I’m gonna be completely honest, I don’t remember when I posted by last chapter of this series but it was sometime in early November I think so we’re just gonna jump right to New Year’s Day and this one will be relatively short because it’s just a fluff piece. I’ll try to stay up to date but like I always do, I’ve got about 10 things going at once so don’t hold your breath. That being said, asks are always open so send me your requests and I’ll get to them as fast as I can! HAPPY NEW YEAR’S EVERYONE!

  Song Credit: Start Again -- Gabrielle Aplin

  masterlist

  the other masterlist

xx

  After you and Tyler made up, you couldn’t stand to be away from him. You wanted to get back to how you and Tyler used to be, so you spent as much time together as you could; practices, games, dinners, date nights, etc. What you really wanted, though, was just to wake up next to him as many times as you could. You hadn’t realized how much you’d missed Tyler’s annoying sleeping habits until you hadn’t been around them for a few months. But now that they were back, that you were back to hear them, you laughed when his snoring would wake him up and you’d roll your eyes when he’d blame you for it all. You knew that after last night, he’d needed a good sleep before the Winter Classic

  “So...” you whispered to Tyler as he slowly woke up, “what’s the plan for today?” He opened one eye and looked at you, smiling when he saw you staring back at him

  “Well I have to get to practice pretty soon,” he said, pulling you close to him, “and you’re coming with me.” You smiled before kissing the tip of his nose, nuzzling your face into his chest shortly after

  “Hmm, I thought I was just going to the game,” you admitted, “you know, so you could focus?”

  “No, no. I want you at practice too” he answered

  “You sure?” you asked, not looking up at him just yet but feeling him nod his head against yours, “okay.. you know I’ll go anywhere for you”

  “That’s what I like to hear” he laughed and you finally pulled your head away from his chest to look at his smile that you knew would be spread across his face. You slowly grazed your finger across his bottom lip before bringing him in for a kiss

  “I love you, Tyler” you said

  “I love you too, (Y/N)” he whispered, squeezing you tightly before letting out a big sigh and heading for the shower, making sure to offer you a spot in the shower with him.

  “No thanks babe, I’ll let you get ready on your own.”

xx

  You sat down next to the other girlfriends and felt a tinge of anxiety run through you before Katie stepped in beside you

  “Relax,” she said with a smile, “they really won’t bite. Plus, they grow on you.”

  “Katie!” you exclaimed, wrapping her in a hug, “oh my god I’ve missed you! You have no idea how happy I was to hear that you and Jamie were back together”

  “You and me both” she laughed. The two of you watched the game, listening to some of the crowd swear while others just cheered drunkenly at the guys on the ice; you and Katie just laughing the entire time. When Jamie scored, Katie practically knocked your drink out of your hand when she jumped up and you did the same when Tyler followed shortly after but the last five minutes of the game had both you and Katie biting your nails. It was too close to call with the clock ticking so slowly, you couldn’t bear to watch

  “No no don’t look away now!” Katie screamed, “what if Ty gets the puck? You have to watch!”

  “This is why I don’t come to the games, I can’t watch when it gets this close!” you replied but you trained your eyes back to the ice just in time to watch as Tyler got the puck and raced toward the net. You stood up and cheered with the crowd as the puck flew from Tyler’s stick, hitting the back of the net. You caught his eye quickly before his line-mates rushed him for a celebration but he made sure to find your eyes again and point you out, making your cheeks flush bright pink.

xx

Tyler’s P.O.V.

  This was all you had wanted; seeing her in the stands cheering you on, feeling like she belonged there. Winning the games without her there always felt hollow because, once the guys were gone, you had no one to celebrate with. So, when you got the puck in the last minute of the game, you were thinking of her; making that goal for her, getting that win for her. It was always about her. Seeing her after the game felt like the best thing in the entire world.

  “Ty!” she screamed as she ran into your arms, legs wrapping around your waist immediately before her hands grasped either side of your neck to bring your lips closer to hers. It wasn’t long before you heard whistling coming from behind you but you were too caught up in the kiss and (Y/N) to care. “I think I should start coming to these games more often,” she joked, “they’re kind of exciting.”

  “Is that right?” you nodded as a big smile grew on your face

  “Just a little” she reciprocated the smile on your face with her own and moved her hands to play with your loose curls, “can we go home now?” She whispered in your ear and you nodded excitedly, putting her back onto the ground gently.

  “Just let me say goodbye”

  “I’m sure they don’t need you to say goodbye right now. You’ll see them later...” She said as your back was turned and she squeezed your hand to get you to look at her, noticing the slight flush of pink on her cheeks and the darkness in her eyes begin to form.

  “You’re right. Okay,” you agreed hastily, wrapping your arms around her waist from behind and speaking lowly in her ear, “I’ve missed this baby”

  “Hmm, well if you’re not stupid,” she smiled before turning her head to you, “you won’t miss any of it ever again.”

[sleepdeprived-readingaddicted]

Geraskier

So I, along with everyone else, is obsessed with this pair!

And as such put together a huge list of songs that made me think of them. 

Some felt like Geralt’s pov, a lot are Jaskier’s pov (because he is the musician) a lot comes from what i think could be going through their heads after 1x06. A lot of these can even be between Geralt and Yennefer. A few of these are just scenarios that came to mind while listening to the song.

I hope this can bring inspiration to any of the artists here or simply bring a smile to someone's face.

Side note: If anyone does decide to take inspiration from any of this OR if one of the scenarios I wrote about exists already please let me know so that I can see it PLEASE!!!!

A light to call home by Julia Brennan - jaskier thoughts after 1x06 or maybe geralt feelings after his anger dissipates and loneliness starts to set in after 1x06

Hold on by Overstreet - so this made me imagine if after 1x06 geralts finds jaskier injured by a monster or kidnapped or something but just his thoughts while hes trying to rush him to a healer

Dont deserve you by Plumb - Geralts point of view of him coming to realize he loves Jaskier during their travels (this is assuming 1x06 didn't happen)

Ghost in the wind by Birdy - Part of me feels like this could be Geralts feelings after either Yennefer or Jaskier leave in 1x06 OR Jaskier feelings after 1x06 because he believes he is to blame for Geralt misfortune or because he misses Geralt and regrets not sticking around.

Blame it on the rain by he is we This i can easily see being a song by Jaskier in regards to Geralt and Yennefer

Almost lover by A fine frenzy so this actually made me think of just geralt and yennefer

Never stop by safetysuit - This was an adorable one. Just me imagining them retired together at the coast doing cute domestic things.

Home by gabrielle aplin this i kind of saw as them in a relationship already and jaskier gets hurt and its nothing serious or by far the worse hes had but for some reason it hits Geralt hard and he thinks jaskier is going to realize he doesnt want this life anymore but instead Jaskier writes this song that he isnt gonig to go anywhere.

Irrelevant - lauren Aquilina this i can see being a song by jaskier

Read all about it by Emeli Sande this just makes me think of why jaskier wants to sing about Geralt so much. Wants to paint him in a new light, be his friend.

Wherever you will go by Charlene soraria - Jaskier pov

Letting you go by Gabrielle Aplin - jaskier pov when he sadly decides to move on from geralt (of course that's where geralt shows up ;) )

Happier ed sheeran - this made me think of geralt spotting jaskier at an inn with someone (who turns out to be a friend) and tries to slip out but ciri sees jaskier and recognizes him from geralts stories. Thus reunion. 

Say something by A great big world - again a possible jaskier song

How would you like it by lauren Aquilina possible jaskier song

Talk to me lauren aquilina i think the title speaks for itself. But jaskier wishing geralt would open up or stop him from leaving in 1x06

Way too good lauren aquilina - can you tell I’m a fan of this singer lol but a lot of her songs just work i think.

Run by jasmine thompson - this song makes me think about if Jaskier had a lonely or sad past how being with Geralt has brought him happiness.

Antidote by faith marie this actually made me think of Yennefer 

Nvm by faith marie i just liked this song as background music to yennefer, geralt and jaskier life growing up (pretending jaskier had a tough life)   

I will return skyler grey

Like that bea miller i can see this being a jaskier song when he gets at angry about what happened on the mountain

Of Course there is a bijillion other songs that could work but these are the ones i came across while i was listening to music and sinking deeper a deeper into the obsession of Geraskier (not that id want it any other way)

Sorry for any spelling errors im running on a serious lack of sleep. lol 

[team-free-will-oneshots]

Sticks and Stones

Title: Sticks and Stones

Request/Prompt: 1. The bar thingy to insert my name into your fics is super cool! 2.Would you write something where the reader is feeling some self-doubt because of how their mother emotionally abused them as a child, and Sam encourages them and makes them feel like their reaction to the abuse is valid? I would so grateful if you would, but only if you're comfortable with it. It's a heavy topic, so I 100% understand if you don't want to. Again, please don't feel obligated to complete it! Thank you! -- @meticulouswreck

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Warnings: ANGST ! Negative self talk !!! Mentions of abuse !!

Word Count: 1,980-ish

note; first off, sorry this came later than expected! secondly, i’m glad u like the bar thing ! i hope this is what you were looking for. i know this is a sensitive topic so i tried to approach it as carefully as i could, but if i made mistakes or you need me to change anything please message me so i can! x

also, unrelated but i was listening to “Let Me In” by Gabrielle Aplin while i wrote this and i highly recommend the song its A+, 11/10

__________

It was always worse at night.

The echoes of her words, your mother’s words, would creep slyly from the recesses of your mind, warping your thoughts, twisting your inner voice to mirror her own. Old conversations stained your rare happy moments, harsh accusations snapped at your every action. Somewhere along the line, the painful memories had distorted your own thoughts, and you’d adopted her harsh criticism - perhaps that was the worst tragedy of all. She couldn’t torment you anymore, but she’d taught you to torment yourself.

Sam slept beside you, eyelids fluttering with his dreams, his jaw slack, no longer tightened with the stress the daytime always bring. You envied him - the night was his solace, but it was your hell. Even Sam’s arms wrapped loosely around your waist, his gentle breath fanning over your neck, could not erase the doubt that crippled you.

He doesn’t love you. Why would he? You’re not good enough for someone like him. He’s a hero, and you’re… no-one.

You clenched your jaw to restrain your sob, channelling it into heavy breathing as your blurry eyes focussed on the roof. You tried to distract yourself, seeking out cracks in the ceiling, stains on the walls, but your eyes couldn’t erase the words reverberating through your skull. You couldn’t even tell whether they were in her voice or yours.

Sam shifted in his sleep, and you felt your heart stop as you paused with bated breath, watching him cautiously… his lips parted in a quiet snore, and you relaxed. The last thing you needed was to wake him up. He deserved the little rest he got, you weren’t going to be the one to deprive him of that. You were burden enough, in your mind.

Daytime was never this hard - surrounded by Sam, Dean and Cas, enveloped in chatter and laughter and teasing, it was easier to drown out your thoughts. But at nighttime, your thoughts were your only company. The weight of them crushed you, pulling shaky breaths from your lips and tears from your eyes. You needed a distraction.

You rested your hand on Sam’s arm, slung over your stomach and holding you close - a reassurance that you were there, with him, that you hadn’t met the same fate as all too many of his exes. But as he slept, it was easy to crawl out from beneath the youngest Winchester, leaving him snoring peacefully and tangled in sheets.

Releasing a shaky sigh, you grabbed your coat and left the room. You weren’t quite sure where you were headed, you just knew you needed to get out. The more you paced around the bunker, the more stuffy it grew. Her words… your words, crowded your mind and threatened to choke you, to snuff out the little hope you had left. And so, when you saw the Impala’s keys lying on the library desk, your fingers closed around the cold metal without a second thought.

The cold air slammed into you as you left the cosy confines of the bunker. Your cheeks and ears burned raw with the chill, and you dug your hands into your pockets as you walked towards the car, parked along the curb. The tears on your cheeks were beginning to freeze when you managed to unlock the door with clumsy fingers, and you were quick to thrust the keys into the ignition.

The Impala stuttered and shuddered with the cold, but eventually roared to life, the noise settling into a steady purr as you turned on the heater and rubbed your hands together before the small vents. As the blood began to return to your fingertips, you rested them on the cool wheel and prepared to pull away from the curb, only to halt as something tapped lightly on the passenger window.

Your heart was sent racing at the sound, the haste throbbing drowning out your thoughts as your breath caught. Leaning over, you rolled down the window and breathed an initial sigh of relief as you saw it was just Sam, bleary eyed and still in his pyjamas. Even his feet were bare, and you quickly ushered him in so he wouldn’t catch a cold.

“What are you doing?” you asked in a quiet voice, though there was no one around to hear you. Sam’s brow creased in concern.

“I woke up, and you were gone. I couldn’t find you inside, and I got worried, so...”

A small smile twisted your lips. “So you came to rescue me? Pyjamas and all?” you teased, and he huffed a laugh, leaning back against the seat.

“Yeah, well, maybe that part wasn’t quite thought out,” he admitted, and his humorous tone softened as he saw the tear stains on your cheeks and the red rims of your eyes. “Are you okay? What are you doing out here?”

You sighed, shaking your head slightly and leaning against the steering wheel. Sam paused as he sensed your unwillingness to talk. “I know what it feels like, wanting to escape,” he said eventually. “It feels like I spent my whole life running. From hunting, from my dad, and now from whatever big bad each year seems to bring. I used to sneak out and go for drives at night. Pick a direction and just go until I saw the sun. Dean would give me shit for it the next day, but it was nice to leave everything behind. Just for a night.” He glanced over at you pointedly, and you gave him a slight nod.

“Yeah. I get that. I get that alot,” you admitted. And although you hadn’t thought you’d ever allow yourself to share your feelings, you felt you’d explode if you didn’t. Sam had that effect on you - being around him left you feeling so utterly safe that you didn’t feel quite as much like a burden, not during the moment at least. Those feelings came later.

“Okay, I...I’ll talk. But I’m not good with… sharing stuff, so… I’m gonna drive so I have something else to focus on, okay?” You spared him a glance from the corner of your eye, catching sight of his gentle, satisfied smile and his accepting nod.

“Okay,” Sam replied. You released a shaky breath as you put the car into drive and pulled onto the road, headlights illuminating the long, narrow stretch ahead of you. Your knuckles were white on the steering wheel, fingers circling it so tightly that your nails bit into the palms of your hands, leaving small, reddened crescent marks. Your mouth was drier than cotton and you opened your mouth to begin, only to find yourself closing it again.

“Sorry,” you said eventually. “I… I’m not used to- to people actually wanting to listen to me,” you admitted. Your voice was small, barely rising above a whisper, but Sam heard it anyway.

“Why don’t you start with… why you got out of bed at three am?” he suggested lightly. You swallowed and licked your lips before beginning.

“I guess… I guess it mostly comes down to self doubt?” Your voice tilted into a question, and Sam nodded slowly.

“What do you mean by that?” he asked. You released another shaky sigh.

“I… I guess I just don’t ever feel good enough,” you mumbled. “Not a good enough hunter, not good enough for you, not a good enough… person. Just… a burden,” you surmised. Something about saying the words out loud, hearing your broken voice piercing the silence of the car, made your feelings seem all too real. You swallowed thickly.

“Y/N…” Sam whispered, his tone heavy with empathy. “Why would you think that? How could you ever possibly think that?”

You forced a short, sharp laugh that was too loud in the quiet night. “Honestly? My mother,” you got out. “She… that’s what she always told me,” you continued eventually. “I was just a burden on her, good for nothing, never… never enough. And she had no qualms telling me.” You chuckled dryly. “I feel bad even talking about this with you now… she never wanted to know how I felt, not really. Sometimes it felt like she didn’t want to know me at all.”

The gravity of your hurt seemed to crush you as the words left your lips, and you couldn’t bite back your sobs anymore. You pulled over, and as soon as the car was off, Sam was shifting closer to you. His thumb rubbed soothing circles on your knee and his large hand found yours, encasing it entirely.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay,” he soothed, and slowly, your tears began to subside. When your breathing evened, Sam spoke again. “I don’t want you to ever feel bad sharing how you feel with me,” he told you. “Or if you don’t want to talk to me, you can talk to Dean. Or Cas. Hell, call Jody! But I love you, okay? We all do. You’re the furthest thing from a burden.”

His words made tears spring to your eyes yet again. “I just- I just feel so stupid even feeling like this still! It was- it was so long ago, I was only a kid. I have you guys now, my new family, and I know you love me, I do, I promise. I just… I can’t shake this constant feeling of self doubt. It’s like I can never escape her,” you whispered, and Sam shook his head slightly, pulling you into his arms.

It was hard to hug him in the small confines of the car, especially with his height, but he curled his frame over you protectively as he held you close to his chest. You could smell traces of soap on his skin, the light stubble on his jaw rubbing on your cheeks, his hair tickling your skin. His warmth enveloped you, and you could feel his heart beating steadily beneath his shirt. You’d never felt so safe.

“Don’t feel stupid,” he murmured, his lips brushing your temple. “These kinds of things… they leave scars. And it hurts, but it’s okay, as long as you keep moving forward. I can’t promise that it will ever stop hurting, but it’s okay to feel it. Your feelings are valid, okay? So long as you remember you have us now, and we’re not going anywhere. I’m not going anywhere.” Sam’s voice fell to a whisper, and you pulled away, sniffling and nodding.

“Thanks, Sam,” you whispered, and he gave you a sad smile, his large hand cradling your cheek as he gently wiped a tear from your cheek. You could feel the calluses on his skin, a result of years of hunting. And though you knew these hands had ended many a monster, and held so much strength, he touched you with such tenderness, such… reverence... And you knew his words rang true. This man would be there for you, always. Through hell and highwater, he would never leave your side unless you ordered him away.

“Well… we should probably get the car back home before Dean finds out we stole it,” Sam said teasingly, and you found yourself giggling and nodding despite yourself.

“Yeah, he’ll kill us,” you agreed. Sam’s fingertips lingered on your cheek a moment longer, running gently along your cheekbone, tracing your lips… and slowly, his mouth brushed over yours. The kiss wasn’t as intense and passionate as ones you had shared before - no, this was soft and sweet and slow. It rang of a promise, and warmed the blood in your veins as goosebumps rose on your skin. He left you breathless when you pulled away, but instead of sending your head spinning, it finally allowed your thoughts to settle.

“You okay?” Sam checked when you didn’t speak. A slow, shy smile spread across your face.

“Yeah. I’m okay.”

And for the first time in a long while, you meant it.

[igigix]

Nobody asked but I’m going to do it anyway lol.😊

A: How did you come up with the title to [insert fic]?

- While listening to Black Black Heart by David Usher, I realized that the lyrics fit my story perfectly. And that’s how Black Heart was born. 🖤

B: Any of your stories inspired by personal experience?

- Almost all of them.

C: What character do you identify with most?

- Easy: Y/N from Black Heart.

D: Is there a song or a playlist to associate with [insert fic]?

- Deep In The Dark -> I mean It / G-Eazy

- Into You -> Toxic / 2WEI

- Bad Royal -> Salvation / Gabrielle Aplin

- Dangerous Lust -> Soldier Of Love / Sade

E: If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would it be about?

- Black Heart, (because it’s almost finished) I would focus more on Rio. His background, family, etc.

F: Share a snippet from one of your favorite dialogue scenes you've written and explain why you're proud of it.

- Black Heart again (sorry it’s my baby, my first fic ever!)

“Who did this to you?”

“Don’t pretend you care.” It’s challenging enough to face him without having to deal with his deception.

“That’s the problem. I do, sweetheart.”

“Like you did care for Beth, right?”

“She means shit to me.” He scoffs and purses his lips.

“Who did this to you?” He repeats, His eyes are turbulent and burning with wrath.

“It’s none of your business.”

“Oh, but I intend to make it my business, mama. Just so you know, I’ll have the answers to my questions. I’m gonna find out.” He states, his voice is all at once quiet and forceful. “But keeping things from me ain’t gonna work anymore.”

“You keep things from me all the time! I don’t know anything about you!” You shout, your frustration boiling out.

G: Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

- I always write my story from start to finish.

H: How would you describe your style?

- Pretty average I would say.

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

- I always eat Ferrero Rocher while I write.

J: Write or describe an alternative ending to [insert fic].

- None of my stories are finished yet but I can promise you one thing that Inchallah most of my fic will have a happy ending.

K: What's the angstiest idea you've ever come up with?

- You’ll know soon but it’s Y/N from Black Heart so I can’t say much for now. 😉

L: How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

- Many times but I can keep up cause English isn’t my first language.

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you'd care to share?

- 2 words: More angst…

N: Is there a fic you wish someone else would write (or finish) for you?

- No.

0: How do you begin a story-with the plot, or the characters?

- I always start with the plot.

P: Are you what George R. R. Martin would call an

"architect" or a "gardener"? (How much do you plan in advance, versus letting the story unfold as you go?)

- It depends on my mood. Sometimes I plan my chapters in advance and other times I let the story unfold as I write.

Q: How do you feel about collaborations?

- I've never tried it before, but why not? I'm willing to give it a shot.

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

- Breanime

- Superhoeva

- Pettygangfriend

S: Any fandom tropes you can't resist?

- Enemies to lovers

T: Any fandom tropes you can't stand?

- I don’t have any problem with fandom tropes. What I can't stand, is how it's executed.

U: Share three of your favourite fic writers and why you like them so much.

- Give and take by Irrelevantwriter cause it’s a masterpiece.

- Dynamite by Breanime the chemistry, the plot and MY JOHNNY!

- So it goes by Enamoured-x from the first chapter, I was completely hooked.

V: If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose?

- I can’t choose. It’s impossible cause I can’t do better than those amazing writers.

W: Do you like more general prompts, or more specific ones?

- « Oh but there’s only one bed available! » It’s so cliché but I LOVE IT.

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

- Y/N. 🤧

Y: A character you want to protect.

- Rio for sure cause Beth did him dirty.

Z: Major character death-do you ever write/read it? Is there a character whose death you can't tolerate?

- I didn't include a main character's death in any of my stories...Yet.

FanFic Ask Game

A: How did you come up with the title to [insert fic]?

B: Any of your stories inspired by personal experience?

C: What character do you identify with most?

D: Is there a song or a playlist to associate with [insert fic]?

E: If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would it be about?

F: Share a snippet from one of your favourite dialogue scenes you've written and explain why you're proud of it.

G: Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write the scenes out of order?

H: How would you describe your style?

I: Do you have a guilty pleasure in fic (reading or writing)?

J: Write or describe an alternative ending to [insert fic].

K: What's the angstiest idea you've ever come up with?

L: How many times do you usually revise your fic/chapter before posting?

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you'd care to share?

N: Is there a fic you wish someone else would write (or finish) for you?

O: How do you begin a story—with the plot, or the characters?

P: Are you what George R. R. Martin would call an "architect" or a "gardener"? (How much do you plan in advance, versus letting the storu unfold as you go?)

Q: How do you feel about collaborations?

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

S: Any fandom tropes you can't resist?

T: Any fandom tropes you can't stand?

U: Share three of your favourite fic writers and why you like them so much.

V: If you could write the sequel (or prequel) to any fic out there not written by yourself, which would you choose?

W: Do you like more general prompts, or more specific ones?

X: A character you enjoy making suffer.

Y: A character you want to protect.

Z: Major character death—do you ever write/read it? Is there a character whose death you can't tolerate?

Transcribed from @stylinbreeze60's post.

Feel free to send me a letter(s) (or any question really! xD)

[peakyxshelby]

soon.

can you tell i was listening to say nothing - Gabrielle Aplin when i started writing this.

Finn Shelby x reader

“He said nothing,” you sobbed into your best friend Finn's shoulder as you cried over a boy who had broken your heart over and over again for the last three years. You first started going together when you were only 16 and had been very on and off since then. You knew the only reason you were still going back to him was because he had been in your life for so long. He was safe in the sense that he knew you so well. You were scared of being on your own so you just stayed with him no matter how much he messed you around time after time. But after finding out he had slept with another girl last night you knew it was time to give up.

“I told him to tell me anything, literally anything. He could have said he was drunk or fucked on snow just any lie would have done but he didn’t. He stood there and said nothing while i begged him to tell me why. And you know what the worst part is Finn, i told him to give me a reason to say but he just stood there saying nothing.” by this point you were hysterical. Fully sobbing whilst Finn tried to hush you and stroke your back to comfort you.

“I can’t do this anymore,” you sigh after finally calming down enough to get your breath back.

“(Y/N) look at me,” Finn said softly using his hand to guide your cheek so you were staring right at him. “I know i tell you this every time but you can’t keep letting him do this to you. You are so much better than him you deserve so much better.” this made you smile a little knowing Finn really meant it, he always did. You had met three years ago when he started hanging around your friend Isaiah and you two instantly hit it off. At first he tried to push for dates and things but soon realised that you were very much taken and since you have been best friends much to your boyfriends disgust. “And you know i’m going to have to kill him.” you both started laughing at the thought as you both knew Finn really wasn’t capable of hurting a fly as you moved your hand up to hold his which was still on your cheek. When you two stopped laughing you realised how intimate this was and dropped your hand down to your lap again. You always had these moments with him, as if there was almost something there.

After another hour or so of talking with Finn as he comforted you as you hurt you were getting ready to leave.

“Right let’s go to the garrison tonight. You, me, Isaiah and Alice,” he said it in a way which didn’t really give you much option to say no.

“Oh if you insist,” you say sarcastically.

“But…” he started and you moaned in annoyance knowing you weren’t going to like what he had to say.

“You have to break things off with Daniel, for good, first.” you both sat in silence for a what felt like a long moment before you nodded.

“Ok.”

“Ok?” he asked very surprisedly because as much as he wanted you too this wasn’t the first time you’d been in the situation before and you always went back to him. You nodded at him and he tried to hold back a grin. “Right I'll tell Alice and Isaiah and I'm sure Alice will be round before. I'll see you later.” he pulled you in for one last hug before he headed off to work because you had already made him extremely late.

The talk with Daniel was nasty. It lasted a couple of hours, there was lots of shouting and lots of tears. It did not end on good terms in the slightest. You ran back to your house from his with swollen eyes and a red face determined never to lay eyes on that boy again. When you burst through the door you saw Alice in your kitchen with your mum chatting over a cup of tea. They both fell silent when they saw the state of you.

“I’m going to get ready, I’m about to have the best god damn night of my life.” Alice and your mum exchanged a look before she got up and followed after you.

You spent an hour getting ready and chatting to Alice about your break up, about what was going on with her and Isiah and then about Finn.

“so... “ she started kind of cautiously. “You're single now how about that date with Finn?” she laughed as she said it so you thought she was joking.

“Oh my god could you imagine, it would be so weird,” you chuckle back.

“Well i mean would it be that weird?” she pressed. You scrunch your eyebrows at her confused at what she was getting at nut choose to ignore her.

“Come on grab your coat we need to get going.”

The night passed in a flash, you were having the best time with your best friends getting bloody pissed. But as the clock climbed towards one in the morning Isaiah and Alice started getting very handsy indeed and ended up disappearing to get up to god knows what. So it just left you and Finn.

“My god i haven’t had a night like this in ages,” you sing leaning back in your chair and taking a swig of the bottle in front of you.

“You’ve been missing out this is what every night is like with me,” he winked at you making you giggle. Eventually, when the two of you stopped laughing he looked at you with sad eyes making everything serious again.

“You sure you're okay?”

“I’m fine, honestly. It’s weird knowing its done but i don’t think i loved him and he definitely didn’t love me.”

“No you’re right he didn’t.”

“Oh come off it how would you know he didn't love me? You don't even know what love is, you’ve never loved anyone,” you try to joke again laughing around trying to keep your balance as you hit the bottle back on the table.

“I've been in love i think,” Finn almost whispered still staring at you intensely.

“Oh yeah?” you scoff a little. “With who?” he said nothing just dropped his head down looking at his hand nervously. “Finn?”

“It doesn’t matter,” he said grabbing the bottle from your side of the table.

“Say something,” you beg after another couple minutes of silence.

“Well… maybe i thought i was in love with you. I mean maybe. I’m not sure if i was… uh, just maybe you know,” he was so awkward and embarrassed that he could hardly string his sentence together.

“You really loved me?” you asked again super slowly as if the sentence might break at any second. He just nodded not making any eye contact with you.

“Well,” you sigh realising that it was kind of funny. “Guess i should have taken you up on that date all those years ago. Might not have had to get my heartbroken so many times.”

“If i asked you again what would you say?”  

“Id say it was too soon…” your words hit him hard as you saw his face flush red. “But,” you start again reaching over for his hand. “Ask me again soon ok?”

“Soon…” he repeated.

“soon.”

[kennothythebard]

Please Don’t Say You Love Me

So excited to finally post it! This is my submission for the @kleinsensongbash, a little bit late but it’s here! It might not be my best fic writing, but I’m glad I finished it in time.

Notes:

Song: “Please Don’t Say You Love Me” by Gabrielle Aplin

Fandom: Dear Evan Hansen (duh)

Ship: Kleinsen (duh) and some implied Galaxy Gals

Word Count: 3,200

Connor Lives au (+They All Became Friends au)

I worked hard on this I hope you enjoy it!

"Hello? Earth to Evan Hansen?"

Evan was snapped back to reality by the voice. He refocused on the items in his locker and turned to see a familiar black hoodie.

"Conner! Sorry I was… I was distracted, how-how long, um, how long have you been standing there?"

"Like a solid minute. I asked the same question like three times. Man, you're really out of it."

"Y-yeah…" Evan was prone to overthinking most everything, but he liked to think he didn't let it interfere with his real life. He shook his head, annoyed at himself for spacing out. "What were you, um, what did you wanna ask me?"

"We still have plans to hang later today, right?" The two hadn't been friends long, and how they became friends was a rather uncomfortable story for both of them, yet they were practically inseparable. Evan wondered frequently if this is what having a best friend was like.

"I think so…" Evan said nodding his head.

"Did you forget?" Evan felt sweat start to form on his forehead. "I won't be mad if you did." Evan just stared at Connor, unsure what to say. "Ok, I'll be kinda mad if you forgot. But like, if you're hanging out with your boyfriend—"

"Shhh!" Evan quickly put a hand out to stop Connor from finishing that sentence. He quickly looked around to see if anyone had heard Connor. Thankfully, it seemed most of his peers weren't paying attention.

Connor raised an eyebrow in amusement. "I'm sorry, have I completely misunderstood the nature of the relationship between you and Jared Kleinman? Have you two just been going on dates and fucking as friends this entire time?"

Evan frowned. "Just advertise it to the world, why don't you?" He deadpanned. "You know I'm not exactly out yet…"

"You're pretty much out."

"Whatever can we just—can we just drop the Jared thing?"

It was Connor's turn to frown. "Something going on between you two? Are you fighting or—"

"No, no, no its- we're not fighting. Things are going, um, they're going well. Like really well. Almost too well."

"How can they be going too well?"

Evan shrugged. "I dunno… it's just, like… I guess, It's like, I dunno, things are getting pretty serious now."

Connor chuckled. "They weren't before?" He took a look at Evan's concerned face and sighed. "Ok, I'll bite. How are things getting serious in a way they weren't before?" Evan stayed silent. He really didn't want to tell Connor about his relationship with Jared and why he was worried about it. "Alright, I'm invoking the NLC."

"Dammit." The NLC was a tool of Evan's own invention. When he and Connor became friends he had suggested that they should be able to tell each other anything, and more importantly they shouldn't lie if lying would be harmful to their health. Evan had called this idea the No Lying Clause (NLC for short), and he felt it had really helped the both of them multiple times in the past. But when it came to personal matters it was annoying. And what was worse, Connor enjoyed using the NLC to his advantage whenever he wanted Evan to reveal personal details Evan normally wouldn't tell anyone, not even his mom.

"Well? I don't have all day Hansen."

"I think Jared is in love with me," he blurted.

Connor didn't seem phased. "Ok… and? Like this wasn't a thing before?"

"I mean, I don't know, I guess he was into me but like… I think he keeps trying to tell me he loves me, and I mean, I just- I mean, I can't—I can't deal with that right now."

"What's so bad about him saying he loves you?"

Evan shook his head. "The fact I won't be able to say it back."

Connor's eyes opened wide with surprise. "You don't love him back?"

"Well I mean…" Evan gestured for a few seconds before putting his head in his hand, helpless. "I don't know. But if I say it there's commitment, and I could have to unsay it one day, but if I don't say it then we have to talk about it and he's gonna break up with me because I don't feel the same way, even if I do and—"

"Whoa, slow down, Evan. So you do love him?"

Evan threw his hands in the air. "I don't know! I don't know anything! I don't know what to do!"

Connor laughed. "Look, if he does say it, just like seduce him or something. If you bang him hard enough, maybe he won't realize you didn't actually say it back."

"Why do I go to you for advice?"

Connor gave a smug grin. "Cuz I'm your best friend."

"Yeah, yeah… wait aren't you my only friend?"

"Not quite…" Connor pointed towards the two girls walking down the stairs at that moment. Zoe and Alana. He knew they would see him and they would talk to him and with all this stress on his mind he wasn't sure if he wanted to deal with that, but at least Connor was there to deflect some of the attention. Alana looked over and saw Evan, giving a smile and a small nod. Evan gave a quick, small wave in return as the two girls walked over.

"Hey Evan!" Alana said, pulling him into a somewhat reluctant hug.

"Hey."

"Have you seen Connor?" Zoe asked.

Evan frowned. "Yeah, he's right…" Evan turned around only to find empty space where Connor had been a second ago. He turned back to the girls and grimaced. "You just missed him."

"Oh…"

"Supposedly we're hanging out later today? I dunno…"

"Well if you see him, give him this." Zoe handed Evan a piece of paper, some kind of rubric or project instructions.

"I will." Evan looked at the paper, unsure. He knew the exact reason Connor had bolted but it was still perplexing. "I thought things were going better between you guys?"

Zoe shrugged. "A bit I guess… We got in a fight this morning, and he apologized in the car but I think he's… I dunno, ashamed? In any case, he's avoiding me again."

"Baby steps, Zoe," Alana said, patting Zoe's shoulder.

Evan coughed. "Um, what did you wanna say to me?"

Alana smiled. "Just reminding you the student outreach group is having a meeting on Wednesday."

"Oh. Right. How did I let myself get roped into that again?"

Zoe snickered. "I ask myself the same thing."

Alana shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Just be there guys."

Zoe gave Alana an awkward salute. "Yes ma'am." She laughed. "I mean, it's basically the one chance Evan and I get to catch up. And with the crazy schedule the past few weeks we haven't really seen each other. How've you been Evan? How are things with… you-know-who?"

"Real subtle," Alana scolded under her breathe.

Evan shrugged. "I mean, pretty good, I guess."

"Uh-oh. What's the problem?" Alana could always intuit when one of her friends had a problem. It was pretty unsettling. Most of the time, Evan was thankful for this gift, but in situations like this it was frustrating.

"Nothing's the problem!" Evan said way too quickly. "Everything's fine, we're fine and know we have a lot of fun together and I think he's in love with me and that's great so everything's—"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, back up there," Zoe interrupted. "Jared's in love with you?"

"…Shit."

"Like he's said he loves you?" Zoe and Alana looked at Evan in anticipation.

"No, not really, not yet," he answered. "Thank god," he quickly mumbled after.

"Why 'thank god?' Why is that a good thing?" Alana asked.

"…I hoped you wouldn't hear that. Look, I-I already talked to, um, talked to Connor about this, he gave me his advice and I don't want to rehash it again—"

"My brother's advice is terrible. And his romantic advice is the literal worst."

"Yeah, no shit Sherlock. When he realized I had a crush on you he suggested I throw myself out of a tree again."

Alana frowned, concerned. "Wait, when was this? Evan, that's awful! He shouldn't—"

"It was a long time ago, Alana. And I'm with Jared and you're together and Zoe and I are cool. Right?"

Zoe grinned. "Eh. I don't know, I'm kinda on the fence about you, Hansen."

Evan raised an eyebrow. "That sounds like something Connor would say."

"Shut the fuck your mouth."

Alana giggled at the nonsensical phrasing and nodded with Evan. "He's right!"

Zoe ignored Alana. "Just don't listen to his advice."

"Not planning on it. I just… I-I think I'll figure it out. Somehow. For now, I just… I just can't see Jared for a while."

"That's gonna be an issue…" Zoe and Evan followed Alana's gaze towards Jared who was walking in their direction at that instant.

Jared smiled at the three as he approached them. "Hello lovely ladies. Evan." He winked as he said Evan's name, causing Evan to blush profusely. "Did you wanna do anything later today?" The question was clearly directed at Evan, who found himself at a loss for words.

"He has plans with Connor later," Alana chimed in.

"Well bring him along. The more the merrier, right?" Jared chuckled as Evan's jaw dropped. "I'm kidding. Just wanted to see the look on your beautiful face. You kids have fun. And if things change let me know." Jared patted Evan's shoulder affectionately, then began walking away.

"Good to see you too, Kleinman," Zoe called after him.

"Sorry, computer club awaits, no time for proper farewells." Jared gave a quick wave goodbye then disappeared down a hallway. Evan gave a small wave with what must have been a foolish smile and an awful feeling in the pit of his stomach. He was suddenly overcome with only one thought, that he needed to be anywhere but here, and his only instinct was to act upon it. He ran through the hallways, leaving Alana and Zoe calling after him and quickly ran into a bathroom.

He turned on a sink, splashed some water in his face and tried some of the deep breathing exercises he had been taught. He did everything to remain calm. He was not about to have a fucking anxiety attack because his boyfriend smiled at him. He just needed to compose himself so nobody saw him like this. Please, Jared, just… please don't say you love me.

The sound of the door opening brought him back to reality. "Evan, you in here?"

His eyes widened and he turned away. "Zoe! You-you can't be in here!"

"Ask me if I give a fuck." Evan could just make out Zoe approaching him in the mirror in his periphery. Something changed when she saw what was happening. "Hey are you ok?" Evan nodded. "Are you sure? Like, you're not going to have an anxiety attack, right?" Evan vigorously shook his head. He knew now he would be fine, but he just—he just couldn't. "Well, what's going on?"

Evan shook his head. "I can't… just… ask Connor."

Zoe gave Evan an odd look but pulled her phone out and started typing a text. The two waited with bated breath as a string of texts from Connor poured in. "Oh…Ok…I think I'm getting it…wait…oh, I got it now." Evan turned, not directly facing Zoe, but able to see her a little better. "Not to diminish your feelings, but you're worrying over a problem that doesn't exist yet."

"But it will soon, and… and what if I'm not ready to say it back?"

"You really think Jared will break up with you over something so trivial?"

"…Maybe."

"Look, there's no serious problems in your relationship, right? It's fun and you both enjoy each other's company. Jared's not going to risk losing that just because you can't say that word back."

"You don't know that." At that moment the door swung open and Evan heard the mumbling of a random student. The student froze as he saw Zoe.

"Ocupado!" Zoe called over her shoulder as the terrified student slowly backed out. Evan and Zoe looked at each other before sharing a laugh, diffusing the tension from before. Zoe looked at Evan with a soft smile. "Look, Jared is smarter than he looks. Just barely, but he is." Evan cracked a small smile at the joke. "I think he'll know that that's a pretty serious thing for anyone to consider. And if anything bad does happen, let me know and I'll punch him in the dick."

Evan chuckled. "Thanks I guess."

"Hey what are best friends for?"

Evan smirked. "Apparently, telling you to seduce your boyfriend and then bolting when his sister appears."

"Are you saying I, Zoe Murphy, am second place in your friends list? To my brother? I'm offended, Evan."

"Wounded, even?"

"Hurt, Evan."

"You know you and Connor are actually a lot alike."

"Shut your fuck."

"Come on, how is that offensive, he's your brother."

"Speak of the devil and he shall appear," a voice from the doorway said. Connor stood there, un-phased by the scene before him. "Just wanted to make sure everything was cool. Offer you a ride home." He gave Zoe an awkward glance. "I can give you a ride too, if you want."

"Thanks, but Alana and I are studying after school."

"Right. Studying." Connor made air quotes as he said the last word, causeing Evan to chuckle and Zoe to become annoyed.

"Shut up Connor, why does you mind always go straight to sex?"

"It doesn't always go there—"

"Your advice to my predicament of what to do with Jared was to seduce him."

"Hey it works in that situation!" Zoe and Evan laughed, almost forgetting the tension from before. Almost.

Evan liked it when Connor gave him a ride home. He could just look out the window as the scenery rushed by, looking at the trees, the houses, the stores, the cars… He often didn't even pay attention to where they were going. But as they drove along, something felt off to Evan. As Connor slowed to a stop, Evan looked back at him.

"I thought we were going to your house…?"

Connor shrugged. "We were. But I got a text from Jared and I thought you two might want to hang out."

Evan rolled his eyes. "He can go one afternoon without seeing me."

"You're going to have to face him eventually. If you don't, then your relationship really will fall apart."

"Why do you have to be so right when you're serious?" Connor merely shrugged again.

"Just… talk to him. And if he does hurt you in any way, I'll punch him in the dick."

"That's exactly what Zoe said. You two are a lot alike, you know."

"Shut the hell your mouth."

"That is also almost exactly what she said."

"Just get the fuck out of my car and talk to your boyfriend, Hansen."

Evan hesitated, but grabbed his bag and opened the door, looking back to Connor's car as he walked up to Jared's front door and knocked. Jared answered, looking pleasantly surprised.

"Hey, I thought you said you were hanging out with Connor today."

"Well, my best friend is an idiot who drove me to the wrong house!" He yelled these last few words back at Connor, who honked and drove off.

"Come on in." Evan followed Jared into the living room, setting his backpack on the ground before Jared pulled him in for a quick, passionate kiss.

"So, um," Evan could already feel the blood rush to his cheeks, "what did you wanna do?"

Jared gave a playful smile. "Well my parents won't be back until tomorrow…

"…So you want to binge Parks and Rec again." Jared laughed.

"Not exactly."

"You have to get sick of that show eventually, we've watched the entire thing like a billion times."

"We're not binging Parks and Rec."

"Ok, thank god—"

"We're binging The Good Place."

Evan gave a deep, exasperated sigh. "Why are you like this?"

"It's a good show, you'll like it. And we can cuddle the entire time." Jared kissed Evan's cheek before sitting down on the couch. Evan shook his head with a smile as he sat down and wrapped his arms around Jared.

"Ok. Let's give this show a whirl."

They were several episodes in, and though Evan would never admit this to Jared, he was hooked. He really felt he could relate to how the characters felt, even if he wasn't going through exactly the same things they were. He liked that the relationships were a little messy and undefined, much like relationships in the real world. He had gone through some weird undefined relationships with a lot of his friends, and especially with Jared. He was glad that everything had turned out alright. He held Jared in his arms and kissed the top of his head, trying to refocus on Eleanor's latest mistake. Jared shuffled a bit and turned to look at him.

"Hey," Jared said in a soft voice.

"Hey," Evan replied.

"So, um, I need to say something to you and I need you to not freak out."

And suddenly Evan remembered everything he had been worried about. Please, I can't. Please don't say you love me, 'cause I might not say it back. "Um… why would I," he coughed, "why would I freak out?"

"Evan…" His heart skipped a beat looking at Jared's face in that moment, so sweet and caring. "…I love you." Evan stopped breathing. He couldn't do anything to stop his eyes from widening. This is it, this is the end, when I can't say it back he's gonna—"And you don't have to say anything back." Wait what?

Jared smiled and continued. "I know that this is a big thing to say, and I don't expect you to feel the same way just yet. But I needed to tell you. Being with you is so amazing, and I know you like being with me. Even if we're not at the same place yet, there's no need to worry when you see where we're at. But I love you. And I had to tell you that."

Evan couldn't say anything back. He was so overcome with emotions that he couldn't name. He leaned in and kissed Jared, deep and slow. Jared responded very positively to this, and by the time they had disentangled from making out, they had to start the entire episode over.

As the hours passed, Jared fell asleep as Evan stayed up to finish the first season. As Evan watched the finale, Evan noticed how Eleanor and Chidi regarded each other, and how the entire time, it had all been about the relationship between the two of them. And it made him realize something.

"Jared?" he whispered, fully aware he was asleep. "I love you too."

Though he might have to reiterate it in the morning, which was a terrifying prospect, he was content to fall asleep tonight, holding the boy he loved in his arms as autoplay began Parks and Rec again.

[cdrart]

Art by me Writing by @bloomingednae

Artist note: The inspiration and reference for future Lastonbell was La Royeaux from Dragon Age Inquisition as well as random shots of a town I saw from the Witcher 3!

Day 6: Lastonbell (Promises/Acceptance) Late

“Just a trick of light, To bring me back around again, Those wild eyes, A psychedelic silhouette.”                   ~ “Salvation” - Gabrielle Aplin

Dong, dong...

The low chime of the bell echoed throughout the pillars of its structure and vibrated all the way down to its foundation. Each chime signaled the current time of day, and it kept ringing up until it reached nine chimes, until it finally grew silent.

To Mikleo, the chimes were sounds he recognized as fear, uncertainty, and a sense of rushed feelings he couldn’t explain. It often brought about a tangled mix of distraught feelings with tiny remnants of happier moments that had slipped in on its own, most of the happy moments depicted from the years of Rose’s life and travels, and clashed with dark moments of anxiety and cloudiness from the memory of Sorey’s departure. In general, the bell’s chimes were a bit of nostalgia and unwanted feelings of indescribable sadness and more often than not, he preferred to not hear it.

On the other hand, his companion to his right clearly showed different feelings upon hearing the chimes. Sorey’s smile increased twofold when he heard the sound and he began to give a small laugh, showing off a childish nature of him that most knew too well. When the last chime rang, Sorey closed his eyes and he sighed once it had quieted down.

Mikleo could never understand how they were so opposite in so many ways, but often found themselves experiencing certain moments within each others’ company. Once it was completely quiet, Mikleo cleared his throat.

“I see that you still enjoy those bell chimes, huh?”

Sorey’s eyes opened and he glanced at Mikleo, another smile forming on his face. “Yeah! I don’t know what it is, but the vibration we can feel while sitting up here makes me so comfortable, you know? Like, I feel like it’s engulfing me, but I also really like it?”

Mikleo chuckled at Sorey’s vague description. “I suppose so. I could only fathom a guess that it could be an attribute to your seraphic element.”

Sorey furrowed his eyebrows, in thought. “I mean...I guess so? Thunder and lightning do give off a deep sound that causes vibrations in surrounding areas where it strikes.”

Mikleo nodded. “And often times, seraphs feel more in tune to their natural element. Have you noticed how much happier Lailah got when we were crossing warm places like the Zaphgott Moor? Or how much louder Zaveid became and how Dezel actually smiled when we were scaling cliffs? Or how much moodier Edna became when there was rain or water?”

Sorey stifled a laugh when he noticed how Mikleo singled out Edna to be in a bad mood versus a good one. Nodding, he leaned against one of the pillars next to him and he smiled.

“Yep, sure do. You wouldn’t believe how much I had to deal with Rose’s remarks and complaints of the seraphim being too happy when she was feeling miserable from the environmental conditions. She especially hated it when it rained and nearly wanted to punch you multiple times when you would take your time out in the storms.”

“Hey! If everyone else had their time to shine, I think it was only fair I could enjoy the weather too,” Mikleo crossed his arms and stuck his head high in the air, a common characteristic Sorey had seen him do multiple times. Sorey just shook his head.

“Yeah, yeah, I know! She totally understood, but she was just speaking her mind. You know how she is...Rose is Rose.”

Mikleo laughed at that remark. “And you’re just you, enjoying the vibrations of the bell tower.”

Sorey sheepishly smiled, but didn’t say another word after that. A small silence fell between the two of them as they overlooked the city below them, much more bright than what Sorey had previously remembered. The city was larger in size as well, as if it could get any larger, and there were talks of the possibility of raising another bell tower, though that seemed to be in the beginning stages of the process. Sorey suddenly felt a feeling of familiarity, almost deja vu, as he stared below. Curiously, he glanced at Mikleo, only to find him staring off into space, violet eyes clouded with almost nothingness. The sight concerned Sorey and he quickly (maybe too quickly, he realized when Mikleo jolted) placed his hand on Mikleo’s arm.

“Hey, are you okay?”

Mikleo nodded, a little too immediately Sorey noticed, and he sighed. “I’m fine. Just thinking...of some stuff from centuries ago.”

Sorey looked away again and he fidgeted with his hands. A silence befell the both of them again, a mutual understanding realized without having one or the other say a word. It was Mikleo, however, who decided to pursue the subject as he leaned forward and propped his arms on his knees, still staring at the city below them.

“What happened that day essentially happened, I know. You promised me, Glenwood is blessed, and you came back. Everything is fine, generally speaking. But when I think about what really happened, how I really felt...” he closed his eyes and inhaled sharply, “it still sometimes feels bittersweet.”

“Unlike you,” he continued, “the sound of the bell rings memories from long ago and echoes emotions that I try not to remember again. It sounds silly, really, for me to be contemplating all this when you’re physically right here next to me, but I’m always reminded of that night and how sudden it all felt.”

“But,” Mikleo sat up, pushing off from his legs, “when I remember how determined your expression was and how solid you were in your Answer, I can’t help but feel relieved, proud, and  excited. For someone like you who grew up in a purely Seraph home to save everyone in the world from malevolence to just sleep for an undetermined time, for people you barely knew of...when I think of that, I sometimes can’t wrap my head around how I’ve seen you grow and how I, of all people, could be intimate with you; and yet, we are determined on our own goals to seek out peace for the sake of everyone, and for ourselves. Despite our challenges, we find ourselves here today and the things of the past somehow matter all the more, including the painful times.”

Mikleo glanced at Sorey, who was all but listening to him as he stared at the city below. When he felt Mikleo’s glance, he turned to him, and he grinned again. Mikleo suddenly felt self-conscious and he looked away, stuttering.

“S-sorry, I just...went off on a tangent there, and I just...”

Mikleo trailed off, to which Sorey took the chance to continue the thought. Looking up to the stars, he spoke softly.

“...Remember what I said about the stars? And how you said each one sparkles in its own way because emotions are limitless?” Sorey glanced back at Mikleo, who was also staring at the stars. He saw Mikleo laugh a bit, remembering the memory and also the irony of it all at the moment. Sorey looked back up and he laughed too.

“You didn’t tangent. You just have as many emotions as any other being would have. And that’s perfectly fine. To be honest, you’re probably the most deep thinker I’ve met ever which can be a little scary, but-”

Sorey’s thoughts were interrupted by a small nudge and when he looked to his left, he noticed Mikleo giving a small pout and Sorey laughed sheepishly at the expression.

“Joking, joking! Because really, that’s the part of you that really shines for me.” Sorey looked to the city lights once more and took a breath, taking in the scents of the cool night air. He exhaled slowly, feeling content with the surroundings.

“...You’ve lived much longer me. You’ve seen things farther than what I’ve seen, and you’ve carried on the things I left behind when I went to sleep. It’s only natural that you have these emotions, thoughts, and treasured memories.”

“And true,” Sorey continued, “that just because you lived longer, doesn’t mean that I don’t know what it’s like to have all that. I do. I’ve seen it in the cities we’ve been to; I’ve felt it in the air whenever we’ve rested in moments like this; and I see it even right now when I look in your eyes.”

Sorey turned to Mikleo, and all at once, he felt an overbearing wave of compassion and love for him surge in him, and he smiled.

“It’s because I see it in you everyday is the reason why I continue to travel and carry on what I left behind.”

He adjusted himself so that he moved closer to Mikleo and turned to face him completely. “I promise to give this world what it truly deserves and that every step of the way, I will continue to watch you as you go through this life. I promise to love and cherish everything as much as you have as you continued to wait for me, so that everything you have done reflects who you truly are; someone who is caring, compassionate, and loving to everything and everyone whom you meet.”

Sorey realized at this point that he had gotten closer to Mikleo; how that space between them started to close was beyond him, but he continued on, disregarding the fact. What he didn’t notice, was, the sky slowly darkening over Lastonbell and the decrease in people roaming the streets below. He may have felt a drop or two fall from the sky, but he continued to keep his eyes locked on Mikleo. He laughed a bit before continuing, a sheepish smile on his face.

“You’re probably so over hearing this over and over again from me, but, I love you. I love you, Mikleo, as much as the stars sparkle in the sky and ten times as many people there are in this world. I-”

His words cut off from a sudden, low rumbling from the clouds above and it was then that they both realized that the sky was covered with clouds, thunder rumbling within them as it passed overhead. As they looked, small droplets of water began to rain down, first as a drizzle, but began to increase in pace as they stared up. At this, Mikleo first smiled, and then burst into laughter, the rain drops now pouring down on the both of them and soaking them to the bone. Sorey could only look at Mikleo with a quizzical expression, and Mikleo laughed even more when he noticed Sorey staring at him. In between breaths, Mikleo spoke.

“It’s just that...you were telling me something, and just...” he breathed in for air, “...sorry. You were so serious and BAM this storm comes out of nowhere-”

His voice is cut off by a small flash of lightning in the distance far from the town, accompanied by a low rumble of thunder. Sorey’s expression turned into surprised for a split second, which caused Mikleo to laugh more at Sorey’s distraught reaction.

All at once, Sorey’s eyes suddenly lit up and he turned to Mikleo smiling once more.

“Do you think...wait, is this storm caused by us?!”

Mikleo stopped laughing, but retained his smile as he looked at Sorey. He shrugged, almost feigning childish innocence as if he had committed a small crime, and looked again to the city, its lights still on.

“...who knows? Though we are sitting on Sindra’s vessel, I highly doubt it would have any direct effect on the land around us...”

He tapped his cheek with his index finger and looked up. “...however, if we hypothetically look at it, our emotions right now could have the potential to indirectly dictate the surrounding elements akin to our own and thus project it within this domain for just a short instance...”

Mikleo trailed off and without so much turning his head to look at Sorey, he side glanced him and gave a small mischievous smile. It was a characteristic Sorey hadn’t seen in a long time, and given the circumstances, he knew Mikleo was playing around with him and knew very well that their emotions just so happened to dictate the elements around them. Sorey nudged Mikleo a bit on the side, to which Mikleo reacted to and he laughed.

“You’re real sly, you know that?” Sorey commented, and he laughed as Mikleo just smiled.

“There’s no direct harm to anyone, rest assured. Since I believe...our emotions are merely personal attributes to helping everyone around us and...emotions that depict our own personal emotions to each other.”

Sorey just shook his head and another jolt of lightning in the distance flashed. The rain continued to pour down, but neither of them decided to move as they both sat next to each other, still in each other’s company as they sat upon the bell tower.

When another low rumble of thunder was heard, Sorey looked up; and whether if it was that thunder or the continuous rainfall that encouraged him, Mikleo turned to Sorey; ponytail soaked, bangs completely flattened, circlet glistening with the water droplets falling off of it. In that moment that Sorey observed him, Mikleo slowly closed the space between the two of them and gently gave a kiss to him.

He felt the warmth of Mikleo’s mouth clash with his against the cool air around them, but it was the sudden presence of touch that sent jolts up Sorey’s spine and inevitably (and probably) sent another lightning flash in the distance. It ended as quickly as it began, and Mikleo pulled away in a manner that was very much like him. Sorey could tell he was beyond another shade of red, since he typically did not initiate as much as Sorey did, and he could only smile at how Mikleo’s mannerisms were just so very...Mikleo, for a lack of better terms in Sorey’s mind.

 As soon as Mikleo opened his mouth again (probably to try to apologize for his rashness), Sorey cupped one side of Mikleo’s face and pulled him close again, his other hand on Mikleo’s shoulder for support. He almost smiled midway through the kiss as Mikleo pulled him closer by wrapping his arms around Sorey’s neck, this time prolonging the length. The rain continued to pour around them and some time during the moment, Sorey realized he never finished his speech to Mikleo, but he internally brushed it off, realizing that Mikleo was right all along when he always told him that he was much better in expressing through action versus words.

When the rain began to finally die down, they both found themselves face to face with one another, forehead resting upon each of their own and their eyes locked together. Mikleo still kept his arms around Sorey’s neck and Sorey’s hands somehow found themselves on Mikleo’s waist, but he kept it there, until the rain completely ceased. Wordlessly, they stared at each other as the world around them continued on, and it was through a smile that they both mutually understood the unspoken promise between themselves.

“I was buried underneath and all that I could see was white, My salvation.”

[soooldout]

tagged by @hannahshouyu to do this tag, thanks!

Rules: answer 8 questions & write another 8 for people I tag to answer

1. what was the last good book or series you read?

what is a book (jk jk that is blasphemy...I used to be a huge book nerd but the past two years just havent read much at all) hmmm let’s see the last one I remember liking was All The Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr

2. do you collect anything or want to start a collection of something?

I collect biases? lol

3. if you won the lottery tomorrow, what’s the first thing you’d buy?

a ticket out of this hell hole

4. what’s the very first username you remember having online? 

just my name with my year of birth lol so original

5. what’s that one (or more) song/movie/show/book you can just listen to/watch/read over and over again without getting tired of it? 

Songs (there are so many tho! but off the top of my head at the moment): Miss You by Gabrielle Aplin, Tiger Moth by Kihyun, Daydream by Sunggyu (or like all of his songs), Snow Patrol - If there’s a rocket tie me to it, Coldplay - A Sky Full Of Stars or any coldplay discography really

Shows: The Office and Parks and Rec

Movie: I barely watch movies more than once or twice even if I love them so not sure

Books: Harry Potter series, Anne of Green Gables series again I haven’t read books in a while but I used to re-read those a lot

6. what are 5 of your fav b sides, lesser know or non-title tracks?

wow too many how to choose :(

B.A.P - Its All Lies (there are so many amazing non title tracks though I just put down the first one I thought of...Rain Sound was my first thought but its title I guesss)

BTOB - Melody Song

AKMU - Melted

Nell - Tinnitus

Day6 - I Need Somebody (fuckin love this song its so goooddd, new fave)

p.s. didn’t choose any Infinite songs because - unpopular opinion I KNOW DONT @ ME - I much prefer their title tracks to b sides not that I’m saying I dislike the b sides (they are vocal kings after all) just that their title tracks are superior for me, they have done a great job picking amazing title songs every time (OK I’LL SAY JULIA I LOVE THAT SONG)

7. if you could live anywhere in the world for one full year, rent paid, where would you move? 

ooh. this is hard. Hawaii probably

8. (i’m gonna steal it from mine bc it was fun) if you could have any creature (real or mythological) as a pet with the guarantee that it would not kill you, what would you want?

PANDA PANDA PANDA (baby one that would stay baby forever)

fukcing love pandas

My eight questions:

1. What was the best dream you ever had, or most interesting one (a good story)? (this one for @gotinspirit especially although I know many of your wild dreams already)

2. Which celebrity/idol do you think you are most like in terms of personality?

3. (stealing this Q from hannahshouyu coz curious) -  what are 5 of your fav b sides, lesser known or non-title tracks?

4. Any show/drama you’ve watched that you would recommend?

5. Do you have any phobias?

6. What is your favorite thing about your best friend/favorite person in the world?

7. What, in your opinion, was the worst thing to happen in kpop in 2016/17 (pain as I type this question ofc)

8. Worst and favorite hairstyle/hair color on your bias/biases?

tagging @feelsogukk @diamond-4-luna @whiteconfession @anna-something @fae-hyun @daestopiaa @gyu-booty @glorioushowon @leesungjongg @ohsunggyu @puppynamu @becuzgyu @vefh @bapofficial @eternalsquee @gotinspirit @jdw-juseyo @lauraslm @baby-mylove-beautiful

[agentverbivore]

Hey, Verby! I had a small fan fic related question: how do you come up with your titles? I always get stumped when I try and figure out what to title my fics, lol. And since yours are always so good, I figured I'd ask! Thanks!

aw cheers, thank you!

boy, I… guess I don’t even know, haha. it really varies. 

since I do a lot of movie AUs, some fics just keep those titles or they’re a play on the original title - like, Dirty Designing (Dirty Dancing), Fantastic Beasts, Leopold Fitz’s Diary (Bridget Jones’s Diary), and Drive Me Crazy.

sometimes, I’m referencing/quoting something - Rosehill Cottage (that’s just from The Holiday, the AU source material itself - it’s what the cottage is called in the movie, and I didn’t really like “the holiday” as a title bc it felt too vague. but I thought I might be able to make a good title gif from it, so… ;-) )Like Magic (which is Fitz’s line in 1x01 about “it’s like magic - but it’s science” - and all the titles in the fic are AoS quotes, too)Palm to Palm (which is a cheeky reference to Shakespeare - “palm to palm is holy palmer’s kiss” - that makes me laugh like hell considering the story of that fic)Turn and Speak, Memory (this is a combo of the title of the article - already a Nabokov reference itself - that inspired the AU as well as the Doctor Who episode Turn Left, which provided the back half of the plot)I’m Mechanics, He’s Medical (which is a Firefly play on “I’m engineering, she’s biochem”)The Scientific Properties of Pie-Making and Dead-Waking (a play on a line from Pushing Daisies, the AU source) Dinner at the End of the Universe (a Douglas Adams reference, natch)While We Were Sleeping (although it’s unrelated to the movie I love, that’s where it’s from)Well Formed and Symmetrical (which is referring to Jemma’s line about Mike in 1x10)Forever is an Ambiguous Concept / A Quantification of Forever (both plays on the AU TV show’s title, Forever)The Event Horizon (that reference is self-explanatory, no?)

a lot of my titles are song lyrics. some of them came to me easily, as I was writing or right after I finished - Bright (the title of a song I discovered while I was writing and was blown away by how much it related to Stardust - even including the word itself!)The Storm Inside (actually a play on two different songs - Don’t Look Down, which I also use for the chapter titles, has the lyric “can you feel the lightning inside of you?” and then Stay With You, which is a big OTP song for FitzSimmons in my head for that fic, and has a lyric that goes “I can feel the storm inside you.” so I mashed em together to create the title!)Light Up the Sky (an old fave song that I happened to listen to while I was knee-deep in writing it, and thought it was just perfect for the story)Wide Awake (after Salvation by Gabrielle Aplin, bc I was feeling emo abt these two and listening to it a lot at the time)Out There (If I Reach Out) (which is a combo of two songs that are important in the fic itself) Every Little Thing (which is from the song I was listening to a lot while I wrote it) All That I’ll Ever Need / So In Love (both written for Tenerife Sea specifically)

other times, titles take a lot of brainstorming - Matchmaking Misadventures: Skye’s the Limit involved a lot of ridiculous title bantering between myself and my beta, and Dirty Designing actually took forever to name, with lots of input from two close friends. (ironically, the title I ended up going with wasn’t even on our brainstorm list - I came up with it myself at the eleventh hour, lmao. and this was after days of debate. go figure. the one from the brainstorm that I liked the best was Dirty Dynamics, which I still think is nice, haha.)

sometimes, a title that I thought was settled changes due to outside influence. Wait Out the Sun was originally “At the Sound of a Gun,” but I was listening to Heroes (We Could Be) on repeat during a mini road trip up the coast while I was writing, and got the phrase “we go undercover, wait out the sun” stuck in my head. when I brought WOtS up as an alternate title to my beta/friends, they all liked it better, and ta-da - it was changed. that song became so indelibly connected in my head with the Crime AU overall that I then named all of its subsequent sequels with lyrics from the same song - “all we’re looking for is love and a little light” and “we could hideaway in daylight,” respectively. :-)

Side By Side also had a title change - originally it was going to be “Of Doctorates and Daemons,” which I actually still really love and am sort of sad I never got to use at all, haha. but then at some point during last spring, before I’d even really started to write it yet and was still only tinkering with the 5k+ word outline while finishing up other fics, I was struck again by Fitz’s line from 3x08: “We had years side by side, and it never occurred to us.” and my brain went, well, in this universe, thanks to the daemons, it does. so I changed it to the final title!

I guess the lesson from these last two are that you should always be willing to change the title if a better one comes along! don’t get locked in. 

and then all the rest of my fics… oy. um. they just… sounded nice? I rarely have a lot of trouble with titles, actually, unless I’m trying to do something specific (like for Dirty Designing, where I needed the D-alliteration AND a sciencey sounding word, all of which is harder to come up with than you might think). I just… try to find something that has to do with the fic itself? like The Routine as a phrase is repeated throughout the fic, so it fit naturally as a title. 

personally, I prefer shorter titles, as concrete as possible, and I tend to like nouns. but we all have to figure out what works best for our own stories and preferences, y’know?

I have no idea if any of this is at all helpful, lol, and I’m sorry it got so long. hopefully you’ll find it useful to jumpstart your own title-writing! good luck!

[namjoonchronicles]

His Pain - [BTS] Yoongi!Au

[A/N] Gabrielle Aplin’s “Start of Time” is the song I think of when I think of Min Yoongi. A Pisces had the most tender heart, I believed. They love hard, fall hard, protect harder. Love a Pisces, they’re amazing.

"Loving him was the most beautiful mistake I've ever done, in my entire life. He was secure in his insecurities, he was perfect in his imperfections and is flawless in his flaws. He was just like me, in so many ways. Maybe that's why, it couldn't work." Min Yoongi woke up with reading your articles. See, he had read many (if not all) of your writings, but this one felt very close to home.

"His dark orbs tend to pull me in more than I intend to delve in, and his smile makes me believe in fairy tales, and I don't know if he knew that it hurts me, not able to tell him, how beautiful he is, like how he told me everyday, sun up and sun down." It continued on. Your words flow seamlessly, as it was arranged, fore thought and clear. Everything was put metaphorically but Yoongi? Yoongi understood everything. It was written in a narrative mode, and it was painfully more honest than, what you have been writing--they often come off as half-hearted and pieces of bits of your life that you shared with your followers. But this one, this one was: Everything. Everything of that little part of your life.

"I strayed away from writing about him for many years. Many-many years. I wanted to keep the exclusivity to him and only him. I guess it felt wrong for me to write about something so true, so honest and raw." Yoongi's first sip of home made coffee was liberating, even more today than the days before. His thoughts were clear, and for the first time in a long time he was up before noon, just because he knew that you were releasing an article today. You were a writer-blogger who had interesting stories to share. And he knew you from years ago, in college. You were library-mates and shared desktops when others are not available for use. The memories are still vivid in his mind, and even though you both are older now, your relationships seem to stuck in time.

"I've stalled writing about him so much, but these few days, I felt like I needed to because  don't want to forget him. And also, I needed to put him in words so that I can move on. But I don't think it will, because remembering him will make me fall in love with him again. I wanted to keep him in my mind, but then I realized, what better way to immortalize such beautiful person if not in my writings and sharing them with you lovely people."

It scares you how much you could love and hate the same person, and continue to live to these day, knowing he's somewhere, breathing as you are. Min Yoongi had a huge folder of unfinished songs in his laptop, written with the idea of you. He hasn't decided what he wanted to do on his day off two hours ago, but he had an idea now. He was going to go to the coffee bar you usually go to. He had been watching you, timidly. "Real love needed to be protected, at all cost. Instead, I tenderly wrap his stories in my head, in my folders, and I wrote it for us." Yoongi flickered his eyes to your laptop, you were taking a few sips of coffee, done the way you like. And he shits you not, he still remembers how you like them.

Yoongi and you had so much similarities; so much thoughts could be transferred by just locking gaze. The best things are left unsaid. You halt in your typing, knowing that someone is standing right in front of you, and you knew that you don't have much strength to look up at him, and you deathly knew who it was without even looking. That was how much your soul recognized him. Because when he walked in to the room back then, "It's like the sun came out." You breathed and blinked. He pulled the chair out from the table and sat himself, owning the seat without permission. He knew he didn't need to ask. It was always his, from the beginning.

"How did you know I was here..." You stammered. Yoongi swung his head to the side, and clicked his tongue, "578 days is a very long time."

"When you spend 578 days in the same place, every day, you don't really forget it." His throaty but short giggle tugged your heart string. How much you had missed that. "I don't know how to do this, but can we skip the introductions?" He asked, leaning forward, balling his fingers to almost touching each other. You leaned back and twitched a smile. "We were amazing together, don't even try to deny it." He started off strong. "I'm not." You chuckled. "You said in your writings that, we could have been everything but we were so similar to each other, it's frightens you." He said.

You nodded, but hold on. He reads your writing?

"I've been following your blog after you opened them in my laptop in our high school years, and I think your writing is amazing and I've always hungry for more. Although your attempts on affectionate scenes tend to be vague, but we can work on that later on," he paused to breath but resumed, (even with your confused face), "This is not the time for a constructive comments, I'm trying to tell you how I feel when you suddenly disappeared from my life...how do I put this into poetic words, because you know, you're very literately equipped and I'm just me, so: I feel like..." He swallowed his thick gulp, and you could feel that he was nervous. You were waiting for a bombastic wordplay but he shot you with: "Crap."

You snorted. "No, listen... I think we think too much," you nodded to that statement of his. You both were deep thinkers, and conversations with Yoongi could stretch from minutes to hours, to days. You think about others more than you think about yourself, it has become perfectly unhealthy. Your refuse your kindness and fondness to be seen as an act of pretense so you with held being close to any strangers. The same goes with Yoongi. He was exactly like you. "...and I dread the nights that we have to spend without talking to each other. It's been 7 months and 3 days, and I want us to be real. Out of the writing, out of your mind and mine, out of black and white, out of fiction to non-fiction." Yoongi placed the words so beautifully. He stood but leaned to your face, to place a cheeky kiss on your lips.

"Today's our first day." He will not be friend-zoned. You pulled him, hooking him by his collar with your index finger, "Kiss me properly." You said, and puckered your lips to his. Yoongi had to hold himself up, while slowly sitting down and pulling the chair next to you, without breaking the kiss. Enduring this much love and pain for so long, had been washed away with a single touch. His longing soul, aching for your tender caresses. He didn't mind that he was blinded by it, because he knows you'll be right there, holding him, guiding him. Min Yoongi's took a step out of his comfort zone, and you caught him, and he caught you, just as you were leaving yours. It took much courage to let someone have full power to ignite and to destroy you, all at the same time. But if it was Yoongi, you handed those powers to? Your heart is safe.

"It would have been much easier if we were honest to each other. But I was afraid of the same things you were afraid of, so...that's why it took longer than it should." His pain and pleasure, all the same things, coming from the same person.

Date a writer, they say. You'll live forever.

[diefalschemaryscott]

“It’s like the sun came out.”

Thursday, 18th October:

I guess, you assume that being abroad means a lot happens every day, and maybe you wondered why I haven’t been updating for ten days (yep, totally taking what you said, Ronnie, as everyone’s opinion).

In reality, my life here is not very exciting in that sense: it’s just everyday life in Glasgow. I spent most of my last ten days working on my first essay about the Irish famine, reading from getting up till I had to leave for university or some other social thing. Whenever I could, I went for walks around the cities or along the Kelvin (definitely my favourite walkway). I took a lot of pictures, thinking, I might post them without writing another blog post, but then I realised, I quite liked the structure of picture-text-picture-text, and waited for something so exciting to happen, that I had to share it with you.

Well, I went to see Edinburgh on Sunday and we walked around for six straight hours (stopping only briefly once), but I was so tired when I got back, that I couldn’t tell you about my trip.

Now I have to write a little something for my tutorial “Disease and Society” tomorrow (account for the devastating effects of the Influenza), but I am so uninspired about what to write, that I spend my time blogging. (I’m so glad, my parents read this blog as well, so they get to see how very productive I am! Did I mention that I kind of finished the first of two essays that are due in three weeks already! Just wanted to say that again, so I don’t have to feel bad about procrastinating a little…)

My good friend from the Roleplay Society asked me whether I wanted to do something on the weekend. My first thought was about all the work I had to do, about all the reading I somehow had to manage… my next thought was “well, it’s just gonna rain anyway…”. It did rain a lot on Friday and Saturday – I don’t think it ever stopped for a second once it had started. More than once I was completely soaked through, so we didn’t go on one of these days. We decided on Sunday (trusting the weather app) and arrived in Edinburgh at ten o’clock to a rather grey sky. The city was still extremely pretty.

My friend proposed to walk up a narrow alleyway, but since it said that it would be monitored by CCTV cameras, I was hesitant. It looked like it belonged to a very old building and I had too much respect to just walk there, however pretty it looked. Turned out that was the university of Edinburgh and of course we were very much allowed to walk up the steep steps. We arrived on the main street of the old town. And what an old town it was!

I like to write for my own pleasure… but I wish I would be able to describe the beauty of this street to you. Don’t think I’ll be able to, though.

On the street were several performers, singers, back pipe players and such all over the old town (and quite a lot of tourists). We made our way up to the castle first, enjoying the view we had over the city. There is a nature reserve with quite a hill in the middle the city, which seemed rather random to me. I love how the city planners decided to keep the hill rather than building over it.

From the castle entrance you could also see the sea, so we decided to walk there. We walked along the main street, looking left and right, seeing all these shops that sold practically the same things, like tartan scarfs and the like. You could see that Edinburgh was more of a tourist city than Glasgow, since there were no grocery shops on the main street (in comparison, Sauchiehall Street, the one that I walk down to university which is also the main shopping street in Glasgow, hosts at least four of the main grocery stores).

We found a Tesco in one of the side roads and bought some baked goods. From there we basically lost our way and only followed any road that looked like it could direct us to the sea. We kind of knew where we were while being there (we had a map), but when I tried to trace our steps afterwards, I don’t think I actually was able to find the way we took. We ended up at the sea, but with all the grey sky and just industry behind us it was not all that impressing. We saw there that the sun had come out over the city and made our way back.

We were pretty tired by then but said friend proposed to walk up one last hill – Carton Hill – and it was very much worth the effort! From there we had an amazing view over the whole city. We had our little break there, enjoying the view.

We went back to the old town, since that was the prettiest thing in Edinburgh, and then got back on the train (in which we both nearly fell asleep, that is how exhausted we were).

I should get back to my assignment. It’s luckily nothing that I will have to submit (at least I don’t think so), but I want to be able to join the conversation. Taking that seminar, I got the feeling that basically every period of mankind was in the hands of one or another disease. It’s a wonder that so many people are well and living today.

I still got an hour before I leave for Uni, so I’m not gonna waste any more time.

Hope you have a nice day as well,

Mary

 Friday, 19th October:

Ah, well. Turns out, I don’t like uploading directly after typing without being able to prove read my post.

My first essay is now near to entirely finished, I am half decided on my future study plans and I have started working on the next essay, being really fascinated about coal mining in the Ruhr Area. I never really thought that this might be a topic of interest to me.

Anyway, since this blog is some kind of logbook of my successes as well as failures, I should maybe mention that I failed with my social meet-up yesterday. It was organised by the Language Café – so there were really great people there – but we met up in some kind of bar-thing. The music there was way too loud, even though there was not even a place to dance. I tried to converse with people there, but I had to continually ask people to repeat their sentences, not because of their Scottish accent – I have come quite used to that – but because I just saw their lips moving and heard nothing. My friends left after about an hour and I stayed for another fifteen minutes before admitting to myself, that I really just wanted to go home and chat with a friend from home.

I had a demanding day at university today. It was really interesting. In the tutorial we talked about the Influenza and venereal diseases and their connection to war. And in the connected lecture we talked about the recognition of alcoholism as a disease. The last lecture on Catholic Ireland had me sitting on the edge of my seat, typing like crazy, because it was all so important.

Anyway, I was pretty done afterward and rather hungry, so I went home. After eating I started reading my stuff for the new essay; and realised in the midst of that, that I had completely forgotten about the social thing that afternoon. There was another Vagina Talk, and since I had quite enjoyed the last, I had wanted to go there, but it had completely slipped my mind.

Instead I read my papers (more than I had planned for today, since half of it turned out to be unrelated to my topic) and went for a walk, listening to my favourite podcast staring at the sunset.

Now, I spend some time online again… finding a lot of relatable tumblr post and listening to some music.

Have a good night,

Mary

*lyrics by Gabrielle Aplin “Start of Time”

[tonguetiedmag]

interview: Hudson Taylor

Brothers Harry and Alfie of folk-rock act Hudson Taylor may have spent the past few years playing in beautiful venues around the world, but their careers actually began in a quite opposite setting. Doing away with the big stages, bright lights, and impressive crowds, it was actually busking on the streets of Dublin that got them into the world of performance. Though those days feel like a very distant narrative now, the experiences held within them were so formative that they eventually even inspired the title of Hudson Taylor’s debut album, Singing For Strangers. Since this album’s release in 2015, the duo has been hard at work making a name for themselves through their live shows both while opening for acts like Kodaline and Gabrielle Aplin and while headlining their own gigs. Having released a new EP, Feel It Again in March of this year, they have even more touring lined up in the near future and are planning to release even more new music very soon. 

Needless to say, they’re in the midst of a very busy time, but we managed to catch up with them to get an update on what they’re up to at the moment as well as what’s to come for fans this fall: 

You guys have an exciting few months coming up. Could you give us a rundown of all that’s ahead? What are you most excited about?

It is an exciting few months ahead indeed. We're releasing a new 8 track " mini album" which we're really excited about. We're heading over to Canada and the US to support Hozier on his tour and play a few headline shows this month and that takes us up to the end of October. Then we tour around The UK and Europe in November followed by a run of shows back home in Ireland just before Christmas. 

All of this is coming after the release of your “Feel it Again” EP back in March. Which of the new tracks are you most excited about playing while on the road?

Particularly excited about playing "You Don't Wanna Know". It's a bit of a darker song. We've only played it live a handful of times and it's always nice to feel the unpredictability of introducing a new song to the live Show. 

What’s your favorite part of touring?

Being on stage with all our friends. There's nothing quite like the feeling of being halfway through a set, whether that be a 30-minute support slot or a full-blown headline gig, and then turning around to each person playing and just giving little cheeky smiles as if to say, "Can't believe we're doing this as a job! What a buzz!". It's a beautiful thing which is so nice to suddenly be aware of at any given moment really. You could have had a long day traveling, but at the end of the day you can't and don't ever complain because you just feel so lucky to just be doing what you love. 

How do you think your shows supporting Hozier this fall will differ from the headline gigs mixed in? Any parts of both types of shows you’re particularly excited about?

Playing support shows is a bit like busking on the street. It's unlikely that many people know your music and you're there to warm up the crowd and hopefully come away with few new fans of your own. Headline shows you have a crowd where some of them might know a song or two and they may sing the words at you. 

How does being brothers affect your dynamic when having to actually work together? Any specific issues that it creates or benefits it affords you? 

We've been doing this for 10 years now. starting with playing covers, and playing on the streets of Dublin to passerbys for fun and for some pocket money. In those early days we had no intention of making it into a job. We've gone through many stages which have shifted the dynamic and challenged us. We tried living together (outside of our family home) and we have no qualms about saying that it didn't really work out. Overall, our relationship flourishes when we're making music together. We could have had a disagreement and then any anger and irritation at each other evaporates once we're playing. Over the years we've got better at honesty. The benefits greatly outweigh any minor personal issues we've ever had. Singing in harmony and writing songs with someone is quite a therapeutic thing to do for any relationship let alone a family one. 

Are there specific artists/albums that you found really influenced your sound and made you want to enter the acoustic/folk genre your tracks normally fit into?

We grew up in a housed which played constant Beatles & Beach Boys - so that would have had an influence for sure. Paul Simon, all his solo music and work with Art Garfunkel. The Stones. We were inspired by the wave of folk that hit the commercial charts in and around 2008, with the Ben Howard and Mumfords etc. There's also such a great selection of Singer Songwriter/folk artists from Ireland who we always loved like Damien Rice, Glen Hansard and Conor O'Brien (The Villagers) 

Ultimately, what do you hope that listeners get out of your music?

We want people to get whatever they want to get out of it.  If it means something to them, it’s more important than what it means to us.

Maybe moments that make them spontaneously sing. There's so much to be said for just singing along to music, especially at gigs, it brings that sense of community to something that usually starts out so personal and individual. 

What do you guys have planned for after you get back from these next few months on the road? Any specific projects fans should look out for?

Being at home means time to cook in your own kitchen and time to sleep in your own bed and both of those things are much needed after 2 or 3 months out on the road. We're always working with other artists and friends and hope to one day form some sort of supergroup and tour with a load of them.

and lastly, Tongue Tied’s Signature Question: How would you describe your music to a deaf person?

Probably the best way to describe our music to a deaf person would be to just ask them to come and experience it live at a show. There's a lot of important mood and energy communicated simply through dance (on stage and in the audience), movement in general and through things like lights, and the general ambiance in a room. If it would be helpful, you could give them the lyrics to each song which could help convey the message as well.

Catch Hudson Taylor on Tour this Fall:

 https://www.hudsontaylormusic.com/tour-dates/

Check out Hudson Taylor’s new album, out now:  http://smarturl.it/bearcreekdamestreet

Find Hudson Taylor Online: 

https://twitter.com/HudsonTaylor?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Eauthor

https://www.instagram.com/hudtaymusic/?hl=en

https://www.facebook.com/HudsonTaylorMusic/

Article by: Kasey Gelsomino