#listen- i know it's been like a month???? after the event ended. BUT COLLEGE IS KILLING ME HERE

[culxiaa-fn]

Jadean Crowd : " Ah... They are flirting...."

Please ignore the quality difference (lmao), there are 4 weeks gap between Keith's and Emma's hahaha 🫠🫠🫠

[l44serbeam]

hello, can i request college! ellie simping over oblivious reader 💝

eee i lov writing simp ellie shes such a munch

— ALL FOR YOU 𖤐 𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐦𝐬 𝐱 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

warnings — some good ol’ homosexual pining and loser lesbian syndrome, cursing, drinking, smoking, some fratty guy being creepy, sooome jealousy

For the past few years, Ellies followed y/n around like a lost puppy, accompanying her to all the parties, events, and get togethers. The two are attached at the hip, but lately somethings been eating away at Ellie and she just cant seem to let it go.

“Ellie. Im not gonna fucking smell it.” Y/n laughed as she swatted away the jar Ellie aggressively shoved at her face.

“C’mon y/n. If i had to suffer so do you.” Ellie menacingly cackled, her hand following y/ns nose as she attempted to dodge the scent of the four month old jar of moldy tomato sauce Ellie had grabbed from the fridge and instinctively took a strong whiff of.

“You’re distracting me.” Y/n whined as Ellie threw the jar in the trash and plopped onto the seat next to y/ns on her 2 chair dining table.

“You’ve been doing that shit since you got here this morning. Im feeling quite neglected and unwanted in my own home.” Ellie huffed, crossing her arms.

“I have two pages left, fifteen minutes at most. Then we can do whatever, I swear.” Y/n finalized, biting her lip as she scribbled on the bright yellow paper.

Ellie watched her work, eyebrows permanently scrunched and lips a gelatinous red from her chewing. The way she shifted uncomfortably in the seat as her lower back ached and would quietly huff whenever a question got too complicated.

In the past few years of their friendship, this had become a sort of ritual. Y/n would show up at Ellies house a good 15 minutes within Ellie waking up and shed study on Ellies table and Ellie would sit with her and watch her.

Well the last part of the ritual Ellie didn’t exactly want y/n to know about, but she couldn’t help herself. How could she not stare when she looked so sanctified, in her barest form, wearing her most comfortable clothes and her hair still not tamed from slumber.

It almost felt domestic. At least thats what Ellie thought. Shed order breakfast and they’d eat together is silence as y/n played out loud lecture recordings as they ate to not fall behind and Ellie would occasionally pretend to listen, but end up distracting y/n and laughing throughout, making her have to rewind and get back into the lesson.

Pretty much everything about y/ns and Ellies relationship was domestic, the two constantly together even at the most uneventful and peaceful moments.

They’d met the summer after their senior year, both attending a party near their new campus a month before the start of their college years.

In all honesty, when Dina had first introduced y/n to Ellie and they first exchanged greetings, shed set her mind on sparking a casual hook up and then forgetting about her, but how could she do that when after an hour the two were sat on the curb outside the party, nursing a joint and laughing maniacally at each others jokes with the haze of the alcohol. How could she just fuck y/n and leave when in the two hours they were sat on that curbside, she rambled endlessly about her personal ideologies and opinions, painfully pretty, passionate and giggly

That was one of the first things Ellie picked up within their conversations. Y/n was surprisingly intelligent and beautifully put together, made up of thoughts and theories that constantly molded her mind, making her practically impossible to figure out. She was complicated and beautiful and Ellie couldn’t help but feel a sense of adoration paint her chest.

The next years to come, Ellie and y/n were attached at the hip. They went to parties together, left together, ate together, studied together. All of it. And through all of it all Ellie could feel was warmth wrapping around her and a lightheaded buzz of euphoria. But even then, Ellie was convinced all y/n experienced was oblivion.

It wasn’t like Ellie hadn’t thrown hints or made it obvious that she yearned of her, but y/n had a tendency to not realize the things that were right in front of her. So, Ellie decided it’d be for the best if she just waits for her feelings to subside and not let anything change.

Ellie felt the buzz of her phone on her lap and flipped it over to see a message from Dina.

ELLIEEEEE ik ur with y/n ask her if u two r coming to jesses tonite

first of all how do you KNOW im with y/n 🤨🤨 and second.. she said yes

you two are practically a married couple ofc ur with her

Ellie chuckled at Dinas statement, making her cheeks redden in the slightest (not that shed ever admit it).

be at jesses at 7 or you will face ur doom mwahahahhahaha

Ellie lifts up her phone and faces the screen towards y/n. “I think she lost it.” Ellie laughed.

Y/n laughed at the message and Ellies comment. “Noo, she lost it a good four years ago.”

Y/n suddenly slammed her textbook shut and threw her pencil onto the table. “Im DONE.”

“Jesus, finally.” Ellie said. “Im gonna get ready i can drive you to your place so you can get ready and we can go kill time till 7 then off to Jesses.”

“Alrighty ill pack my shit up.”

“Look its my favorites!” Dina yelled out as she practically launched from Jesses couch and ran over to the two, pulling them both into a hug. The scent of alcohol and weed radiated from her, exciting y/n for the night.

Getting drunk and high with her best friends was one of y/n’s favorite things to do, all of them losing any sense of dignity or embarrassment and just letting loose with one another.

Y/n spotted a few unfamiliar faces littering Jesses apartment, red cups at hand and smoke clouding the home.

“Lets go get you started off. Im feeling quite lonely at my level.” Dina laughed, grabbing y/ns hand. Y/n looked back at Ellie and stretched out her purse to her which she responded to with a nod, grabbing the purse and beginning to back away towards Jesse.

“Cant believe you didnt wait for me.” Y/n said in a dramatically offended manner. Dina rolled her eyes, pulling y/n forward.

“I love you y/n, but its not my fault if you took forty thousand years to get here.”

When they reached the kitchen, a counter had a display of multiple bottles and differently tinted alcohol bottles and chasers.

Dina grabbed a bottle of tequila and two cups, pouring a double shot in each and handing one to y/n.

“God this shit can kill a grown man.” Y/n groaned at the intense scent of the alcohol wafting from the cup.

“C’mon.” Dina said, tapping her cup at the table and bringing it up to her lips, y/n following suit. The two gulped down the shots, both immediately reaching for the bottle of sprite as a chaser.

“Oh jesus.” Y/n coughed, her face sourly contorted. She shook her head quickly to shake it off and recover.

She grabbed two cups and poured some hawaiian punch that was on the counter, pouring some of the tequila on top. She made sure to pour one of them heavy handedly with the alcohol. “Im gonna go take Ellie a drink.” She told Dina.

“Ill be waiting for you on the dance floor.” She excitedly yelled before rushing off to the area next to the kitchen where the majority of swaying bodies danced to the loud music.

“Youre actually an idiot Williams. Like not in a joking haha funny way but you are genuinely dumb.” Jesse laughed, Ellie rolling her eyes and slumping back on the couch, her legs spread widely and arms defensively folded in front of her chest.

“Shut up Jesse. The only reason you and Dina got together was cause you don’t know how to take a hint and started talking about her to me on facetime and you didn’t know she was next to me. Not because of your unwieldy intelligence.” Ellie retorted, Jesse playfully punching her shoulder.

“You’re just mad dude. I think you’d loosen up if you juts fucking told her how you felt. You’re getting quite tense.” He finalized with a whisper as they watched a cheerful y/n making her way over with two cups in hand.

“Hello there.” Y/n said, stretching out the O as she plopped down on Ellies lap, handing her the drink that had more alcohol.

“Greetings.” Ellie said slickly, grabbing the drink from y/ns hand and smirking at her pinkened cheeks and already loose demeanor. She found her hand instinctively flattening on the lower part of y/ns back and bringing the drink to her lips, eyes squinting at the burning flavor masked by the slightest bit of fruit.

Jesse eyed the two and laughed to himself, shaking his head. Ellie looked at him and gave him a indicative look that read shut the fuck up.

“Where’d Dina go?” He asked y/n, taking in Ellies look.

“She went to go dance. Im gonna join her in a sec.” She responded, taking a swing out her cup.

Ellie reached into the pocket of her loose black denim button up and pulled out a tin. Y/n immediately recognized it as the tin Ellie kept her joints in. According to her it was the perfect place to keep them cause they stayed fresh longer.

She brought the joint up and pinched it between her lips, then searching through her pockets but not seeming to find what she was looking for.

“Got a light?” She asked through lips.

Y/n nodded and reaching to her purse that was in between Ellies thigh and the corner of the couch. She pulled out the lighter and brought it to the tip of the joint at Ellies lips, Ellie silently taken aback when she expected her to have just handed it to her.

When the smoke bloomed from the lit end, Ellie took a lengthy drag that further lit the cherry.

She grabbed it from her lips and handed the joint to y/n, letting her take as much she wanted before getting up and going to Dina.

Ellie watched y/n under the dimly lit lamp next to them on the night table, being one of the few sources of light. She looked peaceful, looking ahead at the crowd of people quietly with a hidden grin and swaying to the music. Her lips delicately wrapping around the joint and the lip gloss she insisted on applying right as Ellie parked her car and making her wait glimmered against the light.

Suddenly, y/n turned her head and her eyes caught Ellies, catching her in her tracks. She separated the joint from her lips and smiled.

“What?” She laughed at Ellies stagnant gaze.

Ellie laughed lightly. “Nothing. You just look happy.” She dismissed.

“Of course i am. Fucking studying shits been kicking my ass, i was dying to get out.” She said, not reading further into the look on Ellies eye as she watched her.

“Alright, im goin’ in.” Y/n said, patting Ellies leg and handing her the joint as she stood up.

“Have fun.” Ellie said, leaning back again and fixing herself on the couch.

Jesse leaned back once again, his lousy conversation with a guy who stopped by them as Ellie and y/n spoke ending, but that didnt mean her didnt hear the entire conversation between her and y/n.

He looked at her and laughed. “Youre a fool Ellie. A fool.” He said, Ellie groaning and planting her hands on her face, trying to cover the slight laughter that escaped.

“Y/N!” Dina called, seeing y/n search for her closer to the edge of the crowd. At her name, y/n beamed and pushed towards her. “Thought you were never gonna make it!” She yelled in y/ns ear slightly louder than necessary.

“Ellie sparked up.” Y/n said back.

“So you weren’t dancing with me cause your were blue balling Ellie?” Dina laughed and said in a sarcastically offended manner.

“Shut the fuck up.” Y/n said firmly, but playfulness playing at her tone.

“Oh how you torture that poor girl.” Dina laughed.

“Stop i do not.” Y/n huffed. “We’re best friends Dina. She doesn’t see me like that.”

Dina sighed and twirled around to the music. “You’re so oblivious.”

“She would never.” Y/n stated in a stonier tone.

“But would you.” Dina asked sharply, raising her eyebrows knowingly and crossing her arms.

Y/n rolled her eyes but remained silent.

“Whatever dummy. Forget about that.” Dina said, grabbing y/ns hands and urging her to start dancing with her which she slowly caved into, losing herself in the beat of the music.

The two jumped and swayed, only stopping to gulp down a portion of the drinks in their hand and keep dancing.

Y/n felt a pair of hands wrap around her waist, the persons body pressing into her back and the scent of heavy liquor and pungent cologne invading her senses.

When Dine turned towards y/n and saw the man behind her, her face contorted as she made confused eye contact with y/n.

Y/n turned around and gently put her hands on the mans chest, softly pushing him away as she backed up.

“Sorry im not interested.” She yelled over the music.

“What were just dancing!” The man said back, still stepping towards her. “Pretty thing like you shouldn’t be dancing alone baby.”

Y/ns and Dinas faces both painted with disgust, y/ns push becoming slightly harder.

“Thank you, but no thank you.” She insisted, this time turning around the push out the crowd.

Behind her the man followed, keeping track of her through the people and still trailing behind her as she walked toward the kitchen.

“C’mon. Whats your deal.” He said as she stopped at the drink counter and started making another drink, not paying attention to the guy. “Don’t be a bitch.” He said, grabbing the back of her hips and pressing against her backside. She quickly grabbed his wrist and turned to aggressively push him off and in all probability, probably punch him square in the face, but before she could do that a hand gripped his shoulder and he was harshly pulled off of her, stumbling back.

“Shes obviously not into you dude. Fucks wrong with you.” Ellie said, getting frighteningly close to his face, chests touching. Ellie was practically the same height as him if not taller, by this time her jacket off, revealing her built arms from her black wife beater.

It seemed like a fight he did not want to pick, putting his hands up and backing away with a shit eating grin. “Alright, definitely mot worth it.” He said, walking away and out of the kitchen. The few people that lingered around there looked at y/n, one or two asking if she was ok.

When everyone cleared out and went about with their business Ellie looked at y/n, her hand brushing her forearm. “You sure you’re ok?”

“Yeah i am, just got me a little nervous.” Y/n wearily laughed as she spoke, turning back around and finishing pouring the alcohol in her drink with shaky hands.

“Careful there.” Ellie said, her hand pulling down the end of the bottle for y/n to stop pouring seeing how much she was putting in.

“Im good Ellie.” Y/n said in a firmer manner, looking back at her.

“I know.” She softly responded. “Cmon, lets go to the couch.”

“Im gonna use the bathroom really quickly then ill meet you there.”

“Need me to wait for you?”

“No its ok, go make sure no one takes your spot.”

Ellie nodded and walked back to the couch, Y/n finding the vacant bathroom and locking herself in it. She set down her cup on the counter and turned on the water, splashing some of it on her neck to combat the heat that seated to be radiating from her body. She looked in the mirror and took a breath, recomposing herself.

“Alright.” She said to herself, swinging open the door again and walking towards the sofa. When the made it into the living room, the first thing she spotted was Ellie in her spot at the couch, and next to her a pretty blonde girl with big round eyes looking up at her, a smile on her lips.

Y/n stopped in her place and watched as Ellie seemed to explain something to her, her hands moving and making signals and the girl eagerly nodding along.

Something shot up y/ns spine in that moment and she considered just walking up to them and taking a seat on her usual spot (that being Ellies lap) but her words to Dina rung.

She just sees me as a best friend. She sees her as someone to be with.

With that thought ringing through her head she turned towards the balcony door besides her, stepping out and being hit by the cool breeze.

A man ashed his cigarette and y/n asked if she could bum one off of him, to which he said yes and gave her one then exited, leaving her alone.

She lit the cigarette with a random lighter from the chair and drew from it.

Her drunkenness had taken a turn with the sighting, going from a jolly and joyful to sad and sulky. Its not like she felt like Ellie had any obligations to her or the other way around, but that didn’t stop y/n from feeling a sharp tiny stab to her gut.

There was a knock on the glass door of the balcony causing y/n to whip back around. A tall girl stood at the glass waving at y/n almost as a warning that she was coming out.

“Hey sorry to bother you. Mind if i smoke out here?” The girl asked.

“No not at all.” Y/n said turning back towards the view and taking another hit of the cigarette.

“I know you.” That girl said in a recognizing tone as she pulled out her own cigarette. “We have Microbiology iolgoy together. You sit next to, whats her name?”

Y/n laughed lightly. “Yeah, a friend of mine, Leah.”

“Yeaah.” The mystery girl responded.

“Whats your name?” Y/n asked but before the girl could answer, the glass sliding door of the balcony swung open.

“Y/n i was fucking worried about you.” Ellie said sharply, eyeing the girl that stood besides her hastily. “Sorry im gonna have to take her.” She said as she grabbed her arm and began pulling her, not a drop of genuine apology in her voice.

“Ellie what the hell. She was nice i was having a conversa-”

“You had me scared y/n. I mean what the fuck you said you would be there i a minute and almost twenty go by and no ones seen you. You don’t even know her and you were practically on her.” She said, not making eye contact. Y/n shook her arm out of Ellies grasp, making both of them stop in the empty hallway.

“And you didn’t know that girl but that didn’t stop you from go for her. You can have flirt with people and get with girls but i cant?”

“What girl y/n? What are you talking about?” Ellie questioned harshly.

“From the couch Ellie. You were going for her and i didnt want to barge in. You were obviously into her.”

Ellie scrunched her eyebrows in confusion. At the realization the tense muscles of her face softened, but were still written with gentle confusion. “The blonde on? I wasnt- why would i be into her?”

“Because shes pretty and obviously ready to suck you off right then and there so what else.” Y/n shrugged, annoyance building onto her tone.

A chill ran up her spine at the sight of how Ellies face shifted at her statement.

“You’re really are fucking obvious are you?” Ellie huffed.

“About what Ellie?” Y/n desperately asked, Ellies lips pressing together.

“Im not doing this here. Grab your shit, im dropping you off at your house.” She said demandingly, y/n cursing at herself when her legs didn’t even waiver a second before speeding towards her purse to collect her things.

The car rang with the low tones of the gentle rock music that played from Ellies playlist. Other from that and the sound of the road rolling against the tires there was no noise within the car.

Y/n sat looking out the window, occasionally looking over at Ellies tense figure besides her.

Question hung heavily in the air and unspoken words riddled y/ns tongue. In the past 10 minutes of the car ride, y/n had repeatedly gained the confidence to strike up conversation but allowing her anxiousness eat away at it and retaliate.

Ellie suddenly turned and parked in front of the entrance to the apartment building which y/n lived at. She put the car in park and turned towards y/n her hand placing itself onto the back of y/ns seat.

“You really dont see it y/n?” Ellie said, speaking her first words in the entire car ride.

“See what Ellie? You keep talking about this it like i know what thats supposed to be.”

“It is whats right in front of you y/n! Me! The way i feel about you and the way you make me feel. I’ve tried so many times y/n i mean so many times to show you or hint to you that i like you more than what we say we are to each other.”

Y/n couldnt help but let her jaw slack, her lips parting open in surprise at Ellies words. Ellie hissed and rubbed her hands against her face, groaning.

“God.” She hissed. “Look y/n. I dont want to lose you. I dont care how youre in my life but i need you in it. If you dont feel the same way we can go on and forget tonight happened.”

Ellies shoulder slumped at the sound of giggles escaping y/ns throats, her hand coming up to cover her mouth.

“I dont think laughing is what i was expecting.” Ellie said.

“No no no, im not laughing at you. Im laughing cause Dina was fucking right.”

That response didnt exactly ease Ellies nerves, almost taking offense to it. These feelings were quickly eased at the sight of y/n spring out of her seat and the feeling of her lips searing into hers.

A wave of euphoria rushed through Ellie at the feeling of y/n. On her. Her hands on Ellies neck and on her knees as she bent over the arm rest.

It was as if the kiss almost spoke hundreds of words of exchange that neither of them had said. Their lips moved against one another, clutching onto a string of reality.

The two separated to breath desperate breaths of air, their foreheads against one another and noses brushing against each other.

“I think i let how much i like you and how much i dont want to ruin us not let me see the obvious.” Y/n said barely above a whisper, Ellies lip curling into a smile.

“You’re so stubborn.” Ellie responded, leaning back and brushing her thumb across the apple of y/ns cheek. “Its almost three im the morning and you have class at nine, get yourself to bed.” She said even though those very words caused her so much dread.

Y/n groaned but couldnt contain the sheepish smile on her face. “Alright. Ill be at your place by 11. That ok?” Y/n asked almost nervously.

Ellie leaned forward and kissed y/ns lips once again. “Whats expecting anything different. Im not done with you.” She smirked, making y/n blush.

“Ill see you tomorrow.” Y/n said as she opened the car door.

“Text me when your upstairs.” Ellie said before y/n closed the door, her response being a thumbs up and happy wave before running into the lobby.

Ellie drove all the way back to her apartment with a cheesy smile on her face and her hands excitedly tapping the steering wheel to the drumming of the music she played lauder than before.

Just wait till Jesse hears this.

a/n — heres a lil fic for you guys just to keep u fed <<3 love yall and i hope your having a wonderful pride month 😽😽

[lizzaneia-elizalde]

listening to 'jealous girl' then i realized, another damon req maybe where darlings the one who gets jealous⁉️⁉️

So darling continued their reward system, improving his grades and *also* deepening their situationship relationship they had. Suddenly Damon often texted darling that he wouldn't make it to their study sessions because of training/practice for sm major sports event. Darling was all g w it for a few weeks, taking a break but somehow feeling like smth is missing ykykykykykykyk

so when darling was walking around campus, they saw Damon w a cheerleader whose feelings for Damon were clear¹⁰ and where cheerlesder absolutely despised darling since most students thought darling and damon were a thing due to what happened when it was darlings science quiz bee thing

Everyone knew abt cheerleaders adamant feelings for damon. Cheerleaders clearly getting very buddy buddy with Damon

Sooo darling had their heart ache a bit </3

Yandere! Jock x Honor student! fem! reader Part 2

OOOH will you look at that! Part two of the fic! Decided to make this the part two of Damon's story since the premise is the perfect set up.

TW: bullying

You were quite furious.

Damon has missed another one of your study sessions.

Sure, he's improving (due to the reward system, no less), but he still can't confidently say he already got it down to a pat.

You walked through the busy college campus, saying hi to your new found friends and bowing to professors.

Maybe he's not the only one who got influenced by the other.

You told yourself to calm down. But seriously, the exams are coming up and this is an important one for Damon since it can indicate his stay at his main sports team.

You swore to yourself that you'll help him since your Dean finally gave you an incentive, which is a summer job in a reading camp. That will be placed in your portfolio, and list of credits when graduation rolls over.

Definitely not from the intrinsic want to actually help Damon, definitely not.

Okay, maybe you actually wanted to help Damon.

He's been really sweet, despite the initial dumbness rattling your brain.

Ever since the reward system, he's been improving rapidly in an almost terrifying degree. It's suspicious, but you brushed it off. Especially since this guy is actually quite the genius if he uses his common sense.

That, and those days with him, studying with hushed whispers, salacious touches, and flirty gazes before the inevitable lust filled rewards were satisfying you to the bone.

It's lonely without him and his boisterous personality.

Especially he's been there with you ever since one of your closest friends, Jupiter, died months prior, not knowing Damon was the one who ended him.

In reality, Damon was taking advantage of your grieving state from your friend, consoling you and cheering you up, while feeding your brain of his facade of being this dumb yet adorkable guy. And it worked.

Here you are, walking towards the outside basketball court to sit down on their bleachers, lunch in hand.

You placed down a handkerchief on one of the bleachers and sat down. With your simple sandwich in your palm, you took a bite and gazed towards the rugby field which is on the other side of the road.

Your eyes lightened when you saw Damon, running through the field as the quarterback with the rugby ball in his hand.

You gently chewed on your food, gaze softening as he hoot and hollered with his teammates, looking so happy as he's in his element in the field. With his beloved sports, and his beloved teammates.

It was quite amazing how different he looks from studying with a focused frown on his face, to this annoying smirk he has as he scores touchdown after touchdown.

You decided to step down the bleachers and approach the bench. His rugby teammates recognized you and waved with a grin, inviting you to sit down. Normally, you would shyly decline, but this time you said thank you graciously and sat down beside them. Cheering along.

Your anger with him faded slowly, and was about to approach him to ask about the next study session when a woman bumped you away.

This woman, in her cheering uniform, scoffed when she finally caught a glimpse of you.

"Skank, out of the way." She insulted, which made you gasp. Skank? What?

It made you freeze, and you only got to watch her as she sticked to Damon, wiping his sweat and hugging his arm. It made your skin crawl, a pit on your stomach.

"Sorry, y/n." One of the benched members said, eyeing the girl warily. "She likes Damon, a lot. And is actually quite hostile about you."

"Hostile about me?" You asked, bewildered. "But why? I didn't do anything."

"You say, but everyone knows you and Damon are a thing." He whispered. "Don't worry, she's not gonna be that annoying. Everyone knows Damon is heads over heels on you."

"Oh..." You flushed red before your eyes gazed to Damon once more, who is chuckling as the girl cooed and pouted.

'You say that, but he hasn't seen me at all...' You thought, eyes watering before bowing and going away, defeated.

Ever since then, you stopped pestering him about the study sessions.

You only sent him PDFs about new topics, but that's it. No more.

You also ignored most of his texts, yet there was only seldom of them too.

You can feel the gap between you widen, and widen... And widen.

The cheerleader continued to rub it in your face too, everywhere Damon went, she went. Feeding him, like the slimy, little, two-faced, bitchy, mistress she is--!

You calmed down suddenly, shame creeping your neck from thinking those things.

"Calm down, this isn't you." You told yourself, gripping your pen tightly. You looked down at your phone and sighed. With Damon gone, you realized that sure, you had friends, but you don't really have a best friend after Jupiter died. And now, looking at Jupiter's photo as his 7th monthsary death is coming, you felt lonelier than ever.

It was almost childish how Venus, the cheerleader, kept bad mouthing you. Saying that YOU were the one who got between them, YOU were the one who went away, YOU were the one who was finding another guy.

Painting you to be the bad person.

Sure, not a lot of people believed her, but those who do are very vocal about it. Claiming that you were a whore who was spreading your legs despite being a nerd.

This is one of the rare times when you wish the ground swallowed you whole. You were already in college for gods' sake! And they were talking and bullying like this is some highschool drama. It's so shameful!

And you found yourself seeking Damon, who's in the heart of the problem. But he's not saying anything about it. Only focusing on his sports. You heard he's on his way to be a guaranteed part of the national team, so he's really busy.

You asked his teammates too if he's aware of the rumors, he shakes his head apparently, before asking if it's important. Sure, they only asked if he knew about this rumor about you, but other than that, they didn't elaborate on it in respect to you.

You were honestly about to snap from how Venus is being too mean to you. She can have him! Just leave you alone.

But noooo she wants to make your life a living hell like the bitch she is.

With no other choice, you sent a long text to Damon.

Anger fueled, but you know this is the only way he'll wake up from being too oblivious and slap him from reality.

Your hands shook as you raked your fingers through your hair, before hitting the block button finally on him. You're moving on from this guy. You don't give a shit anymore.

But, you only heard by next day that Venus...

"Venus transferred schools? What happened? Oh my god..."

You felt wonder. But you cannot deny that a teenie, weenie sick sense of satisfaction settled inside of you like a guilty sinner.

The day Damon received the text.

Damon was about to keel over.

He wants to see you so bad. Hug you, kiss you, touch you, fuck you...

He's so deprived of your presence that even glimpses of your hair was enough to set him off.

But he stopped himself. After the coach threatened him to scrape him off from the national team recommendation.

Sure, his grades are improving, but he's been neglecting his sports. With a triple "s".

He wants to choke his past self from taking up so many sports teams. Now he can't even see you until the recommendation tournament.

You've stopped pestering him, and he bit his lip. You never even went to find him. What's worse, is that he can't find you or else the coach will chew him out. Even the Dean was in on it too like she wasn't the one who recommended you to him.

He swore to himself that once the tournament is of, he'll crawl back in your arms and spoil you greatly. He can't have anyone getting too close to you after Jupiter. And from his informants, you've only been by yourself other than your friends. This satisfied him greatly too.

But now, it's been weeks since then, and he just wants to lash out on everyone and kidnap you to satisfy his needs, wants, and love.

Then, that unique message ping came. One that he knew that it was from you. So he opened his phone with a grin, but faltered when he saw the content.

Hey, Damon. It's been a while.

I know you don't care about me anymore, and that's fine. We were only like... A situation. Friends, if we're even friends, with benefits. I tutored you, and you taught me other stuff or whatever. Now, we drifted off, and it's fair that you won't care about me anymore. But please! REEL IN YOUR GIRLFRIEND! We've never met for months already and she's still fucking harassing the shit out of me! We're already done, what can she not understand about that?!

Anyways, please. Tell her to fuck off or this will reach her Dean's ears.

Girlfriend? He doesn't have a girlfriend. You were his partner, right? He thought you knew that. But girlfriend? Who?

He looked up dread feeling him as that pit settled his stomach. No. No way.

His eyes found Venus, who's running towards him with a smile again. One that he wants to wipe that goddamn mug off of the face of the earth.

Did this bitch do something to you?

He's been so out of touch lately due to training and training and training. And this clingy woman was someone he wanted to get rid off.

What you didn't see is his forced smiles, the simple shrug offs, the polite No's... But this Venus girl can't take no for an answer until he just accepts it with chills crawling on his back.

He can't exactly be rude and say what he's actually feeling after all. He's supposed to be this dumb fucking himbo who don't know social cues at all.

Oh, but he knows. He knows that this woman wants to be with him. To be his girlfriend, to make him hers. But good grief Damon wants to barf from being touched by her. It felt so wrong being touched by someone who's not you.

"Hey guys." Damon jogged towards his teammates who flinched and looked away. "... What's with you know... y/n?"

They all avoided his gaze before one finally spoke up.

"Finally giving her attention? Bastard?"

Damon was bewildered. Bastard? What?

"Did you know that your childish girlfriend over there has been harassing y/n for weeks?" He growled out, annoyed. "Oh of course you don't know. You always don't know. You're too clueless of everything!"

That was his persona! But this time he's actually clueless.

"Can you just tell me, please. What did Venus do?" Damon desperately said, his heartbeat going haywire.

"Bullying, spreading misinformation, pushing hate on her. The drill. I don't want to say this in respect for y/n, but you are the center of the problem and must know about it. We're hitting showers. See ya." He, muttered, before rolling his eyes and walking away with the other teammates.

Damon went cold once more and ran around the campus and the whole University, asking what's happening and how far this harassment went.

Everyone was surprised by his reactions. They thought he didn't care. But now he's here running rampant in such desperation. So they told him what happened.

Rumor, after rumor, bullying after bullying... It all stacked on Damon's mind that he almost gasped from the weight of it all. It didn't even stay in their college only, but it spread the whole Uni.

"Oh god..." Damon whispered, a pit on his stomach now ablazed with anger, fury, and wrath.

It was so late. He was so late. But he'd rather die than to leave this to fate.

So he found himself, hauling Venus' asleep body up to an upright board in his basement. After inviting Venus to a drink, she foolishly thought they'll spend the night together tangled in bed, but now, he's waiting for her to wake up as he sharpened his tools. His heart bled for you, and now Venus will pay the prize.

No, he will not kill her. That's too merciful.

He'll make her suffer as much as possible.

"Holy shit... Y/n! Look!"

"What? I'm busy studying here."

"No I swear, you want to see this!"

You sighed and went to the window. Surprised to see that a lot of students are by the window looking down. So you went there and gasped in bewilderment.

"Y/N! PLEASE!"

Damon was there, holding a microphone and looking to your dorm room. He has bags upon bags of gifts by his feet and his teammates spelling out "i'm sorry" with placards.

"I AM SO SORRY! VENUS MEANT NOTHING TO ME! SHE WAS ONLY LIKE THIS CLINGY LEECH THAT I CANNOT SHAKE OFF!"

Damon was so desperate, his hands shaking as he tried to fight off tears from his eyes.

"YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT WITH ME! SLAP ME, PUNCH ME! I CAN TAKE IT JUST PLEASE TAKE ME BACK!"

He heaved a sob tears spilling. He doesn't give a fuck about the nationals anymore.

"I WILL COURT YOU EVERYDAY UNTIL WE GOT BACK TOGETHER!" He promised, his voice suddenly turning almost childish as he hiccuped while talking because of how hard he's crying right now. "And-and I'll apologize... *hic* everyday... *hic* and i'll kneel and serve you... *hic*..."

Everyone was cooing, feeling pity for him. But knew it's up to you to forgive him since it's not their place to do so.

You sighed and got down to his side, looking at his face before standing and giving a peck on his cheek.

"Now stop crying, you're embarasing me." You whispered. "Maybe not now that I can forgive you, but i'll let you court me."

He stopped, eyes widening before finally letting the dam flow and crying loudly like a little kid.

"DARLING!" He wailed, hugging you tight. "I AM SO SORRYYYYYY!"

You gave a small smile, not minding the slightly ironic smell from him as he clutched you close to his body.

[hanjisunglover]

001. 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐓 𝐁𝐄 𝐅𝐔𝐍𝐍𝐘 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐇 𝐌𝐄𝐍'𝐒 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐋𝐃

MASTERLIST. ! <- 001. -> 002.

warnings: mentioning of guns and weapons, blood, reader has some PTSD, minho calls reader pet names.

words count: 3.8k

There are two types of people in the world: those who support heroes and those who believe they only bring chaos to the city.

You are not part of any of these categories. You don't care about heroes, your life in a tiny apartment in Manhattan has never changed thanks to them. Your small business as a Pizza's restaurant in one of the quietest neighborhoods of New York hasn't paid off thanks to them.

You're just there, waiting for the big event in your life. Until then? you just pass your time listening to some cheap music from your dad's radio.

"Y/n, vien qua, c'è gente!" Your father's voice wakes you up, his strong Italian accent stops your music and put your headphones down from your head, the song still playing on your phone but you can't look or stop right now. You have to go back to work.

Your family runs a little business, your father works in the kitchen - cooking pizza with the true receipt from Italy. Your mother on the other hand get ready some typical desserts, like tiramisù, panna cotta and even gelato. Your grandma stays the whole day in the same spot, with her purple shawl on her shoulders, her glasses falling to the tip of her nose, her eyes on some Hispanic soap opera and her puzzle week.

You, just work as a cashier, giving them a little help when you're off from University. You got into a really expensive place, with people that have been spoiled their entire life, you just learned in another way the meaning of money.

Your grandmother came to the US when she just turned 25, in one hand she had her suitcase, in the other one her dreams. Learning English from the scratch, with three jobs part-time and her husband with two more jobs. They had a simple, chaotic but happy life. Until your grandfather passed away, leaving your dad the small business that they started on their own after saving the few pennies set aside.

You can't actually understand why they bought the place so far away from Little Italy, closer to Time Square than the rest of the really famous restaurants. Every time you ask to your grandmother, she just justifies herself saying, "your nonno was really stubborn".

Your grandfather, really thought that was the best option, with an apartment include with the small place for the 'sliced ​​pizza's business', enough room for you and the rest of your family.

You know the place isn't very successful, there are few regulars, just enough to make reaching the end of the month with the end-of-month expenses. You know you can't ask for too much, and your college grades must remain impeccable to continue receiving the scholarship. Everyday you think how lucky the other people are, not really knowing their story, but just the fact that during your uni lessons they can normally say things such as 'let's go to a karaoke after this', makes you jealous.

You're not popular, you're not rich. That cut a lot of your social life, but not enough to not have any friends. As you walk out the back of the restaurant to get in the cashier spot, you can see your best friend with a big smile in her face, waving at you. "Yo mama is fine as hell."

You can't contain a laugh, her obsession with milfs and girls in general always finds the way to change your mood, your hand on your abdomen makes her laugh too. "What are you looking for today?"

"Some girls to kiss, wanna be the next one?" Her cheeky pick-up lines never failed of making you smile, you start to count the price for two slides of pizza, "it's 3 dollars," she hisses as she takes out her wallet from her expensive bag, "if I really have to."

You chuckle as you grab the three banknotes from her hand, her smile makes you smile. And for a moment, you're really happy. No worries, no thoughts. For a single second, your life is not that miserable as you think.

Until.

Until you can hear screaming, glass that breaks and terrifying looks in the faces of the people that you love. You never imagined that your life can change in an amount of seconds, when you can see a dark red costume. With weapons on his back and a gun in his hand.

You are not a big nerdy, but you know for sure that this costume it's just for one person only, Deadpool. He's not a hero, he's not a villain, he defines himself to the police as 'cleaner of shit from the others'. He's basically hitman, that if he is not forced by the person from whom he takes the task, he would not kill. And inside you, as you hide behind the counter while your heart shatters your chest, your hands shaking and the blood buzzing in your ears; you pray that it will be so.

You pray that he's in the wrong place, that he's just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but the direction he's pointing is in the kitchen. You feel your blood almost stop pumping in your heart, you can feel a a presence so gloomy that you can only hide more under the counter.

"No! please!" Your mother's voice wakes you up and you stand up from your spot, your best friend is taking care of your grandmother that fell from the chair, you can feel your eyes watering, but you try your best to push them back for later. Before you can even step inside the kitchen, a shotgun pierces the screams. The silence.

You never thought you could hate silence more than now, you run into the kitchen, your mother on the floor crying as your dad is moaning in pain, the chest wound fills the floor with blood. Deadpool currently cleans his gun with the towel your mother usually keeps on the counter. Tears burst and fall down your face, anger raging inside you.

"I didn't kill him." The antihero speaks as he walks past you, almost as if nothing had happened. his mask is raised to his mouth as he chews on a piece of pizza. "Easy, blondie."

The siren of the police starts to reach the place, that now is a mess. It's just about of time, and you pray every single one. The floor has pieces of glass from the windows, the chairs and tables overturned, the TV that your grandmother usually watch during the day is on the floor. Still working, shows the reporters right outside your business place, suddenly Deadpool throws one of his katanas, breaking perfectly the screen.

"Damn I always hated the reporters." His voice, it's deep, makes you shiver as you get close, but you don't reach his body because one of his guns, it's pointing at your forehead now. You stopped moving.

His chewing sounds fill the place, the only other thing that you can hear it's your dad moaning in pain and your mother crying. "Don't step too close blondie, you're gonna get hurt to try dancing with the evil."

Your breath catches in your throat when he turns his head toward you, you freeze, you can barely speak, "why did you do this? why to us?" It sounds shaky, as he gets too close for your eyes to keep on him, his cologne gets in your senses.

"I just follow work sweet thing, grow up with that." His voice sounds so mean, it makes you shiver from head to toe, you don't see his eyes, his mask drops covering his face before you could spare a few seconds off his half face. His tone becomes playful again as the police point guns at you, windows are blown up, letting the spring wind dust off the floor.

That was the first time, that you ever met Deadpool.

Lee Minho feels like heavy rain. The heavy rain after a thunderstorm, the summer rain, that gets into your bones, making you feel the heaviness of your clothes against your body, your shoes soaking wet and your hair all attached to your neck. That heavy rain. You don't know if it's because of his charm, or the fact that he doesn't let anyone get too close to him, but something in him makes you feel attracted. Since the first day of your University, your eyes were fighting you to look away from him, his features. You don't even know how his voice sounds like, not even the color of his eyes, it's the classic guy that you keep looking for in a room full of loud people.

His copper red hair that sprouts the hood of the hoodie, with a backpack on the shoulder makes its way to the corridors. He never looks at anyone in the eye, you don't even understand why he's in that institute, is difficult for you to imagine him as a spoiled child. Maybe is that the reason why you find him so charming. No one really knows how he can afford a university like this. A thing that you're sure about Minho and his student career is that he doesn't care about his grades, because he is too smart to study, he leaves the room when he feels bored and the professors never stopped him. He's just, the genius in the class, but anyone really cares, they know that he's too smart for them too. No one has ever beaten him on tests and assignments. Always on time with the deadlines, making him look almost too good that it bothers.

At least, that's what you thought, now after your father got arrested you can't even step inside a class without feeling your skin burn at the sight of the windows, scared for your life that suddenly they can break like that day. Your usual sit it's right next a big window, where your desk is with all the little draws on the top, but not today.

Not today because that seat it's already taken, taken by Lee Minho. You can feel your cheeks getting warm up, that has been your seat since the year of the semester. Everyone knows that's your seat.

"Excuse me?" You try to sound as gentle as possible as the guy that is writing in his notebook, his eyes still down, doing some tricks with the pen as he doesn't dare glancing up at you. "Sorry, uhm?"

Minho sigh as you don't move away from his side, standing right next the table that he chose, he takes a deep breath as he turns his face to look at you. It's the first time that you can see his eyes, that are a dark brown, the definition of heavy rain that you gave to him the first day that you saw him feels exactly like his eyes. Cold, his eyes are cold. "What?"

"That's my spot," you point lightly at the table, where his stuff are already placed, and Minho does not like moving around when he finds his spot. He's like a cat, it's hard to make him move from his new favorite angle of the room, "No it's mine." The whole conversation is too childish for you to talk back.

You can feel your cheeks warm up because his voice is firm, making you almost trip in your words as you turn in your feet to find another table, part of you it's a relief. Because your seat it's right beside the window, and being that close to them would make you panic, but of course; Minho doesn't know that. Or that's what you think.

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For the entire week, Minho took your spot, you didn't know why and he's not that close to anyone to actually ask and know the reason, you just.. accepted. Who are you to tell him what to do?

Every morning - you're not sure how long ago that started but however - you passed there to greet, and leave a juice jug that you bought the machines, nobody had ever approached him like this. You knew you were not special from the others, but you were pleased to see how Minho after about ten seconds that left the juice on the table, smiled by raising just the corners of the mouth. That made you feel good. The following Monday, Minho is not there, he is never late, which makes you worry. Not that you are friends or more, but that situation was created where you feel you are the duty to.. understand, to know why it is not there.

"Do you know where Minho is?" murmurs to your friends, that are just talking to each other about the last assignment that was hell on earth, your head is in your hands as you look around, your eyes are just looking for one person ad one only.

"y/n, why are you so interested in him?"

Your expression is pure surprise as you look up at your friend, "me? uh, no reason?" You can't lie when your cheeks are getting red just to think about the man that is living in your mind rent free. "you keep asking about him today! and murmuring stuff, do you have a crush on him?"

Their sudden questions makes you close yourself a little in your thoughts, is really like that?, you're not sure, you never named what you felt for Minho before. You just, let it happened, you can't control your feelings. You can hear the door slamming against the wall, shaking the windows a little and that makes you shake silently.

Minho enter into the room, surrounded by silence, no one says a single thing. 'Cause his face is covered in wounds, a split lip and a cut to his eyebrow, you feel dizzy at the sight. "What do you have to look at?"he spits out like he's surprised that everyone is paying attention to him now, they never have before.

But he's hurt, and you can't stand it, you can't stand of the sight of more people hurt. You almost jump off the chair where you're sitting, making a really high pitch sound with it on the floor, now the attention it's all around you. Your friends murmur something to convince you to sit back but you can't. Your eyes are locked in his. You can see his surprise of seeing you standing up for him even if he's not moving any muscle of his face. He knows that you care. More than everyone else.

Your walk is the only sound that the room can hear, your mind keeps whispering: don't do that, don't do that, don't do that. You never skipped a lesson, you never put yourself in trouble, you are always the perfect student. Oh, fuck it.

You grab Minho's hand, he hisses at the feeling of his hand against yours, the skin it's almost burning for the feeling that makes his cheeks red up, but he doesn't want to admit it. You guys walked out of the class, his eyes on you are making you feel so stupid right now.

"what do you think you're doing?" he mumbles letting his hand grab tighter around yours, he's complaining but he's not letting you go.

You just let yourself go to the nursing room, opening the door nd making him take a seat in one of the beds, "let, let me take a look." You try to move away from him but his hand it's still holding yours tight, your breath catches your throat as you take a deep breath, his thumb passing against your knuckles.

He lets you grab some bandages and disinfectant for the cut on his lip, you stand right in front of him, he moves his thighs spread to let you get closer. His hands finish to play with the edge of your skirt, feeling your whole body shakes a little. You can't stop yourself from crying at his injuries, your hands touch his face so gently that he's surprised too.

Minho chuckles as he looks over you his eyes are gentle, feels more warmer than the first time that they ever made eye contact, "why are you crying blondie?"

The nickname makes you chuckle, he's not gonna be the first one to call you like that, and he's never gonna be the last one. "nothing I, I don't like when people I care gets hurt," you sniff and he stays silent, you can't read his face, you never did.

"what happened? if I can ask," for the first time, Minho seems really interested in what you're about to say, so you just let your thoughts speak. "two months ago, my dad's business got under attack from a hero, he stabbed my father and then he left letting him go away with the police, seems like he had an under business with some drugs thing, not sure. I really.. didn't know that, so I don't feel totally okay in the last couple weeks."

His chuckle stops your thoughts and you raise your eyes to look at him, his lips are showing his teeth from the laugh, "a hero? no hero would do that in such a cool way princess," his voice stops before going more into that topic, noticing your confused expression, "I mean, still horrible, but he took your father for a good thing. but I wouldn't call him a hero. pff."

Minho seems almost pissed at the way that you called Deadpool, a hero, you chuckle as you move his jaw to check for other cuts or other injuries, "you seem almost a fan."

"he sounds cool, are you scared of him now?" his voice it's deeper than usual, shivers run down your spine as you stop your actions, his eyes are locked on yours as his hands slowly grab the back of your thighs. "are you scared, bunny?"

"I'm.. not."

"you sounds like," his smirk makes you swallow. He stands up and you are facing him now, well, for the best that you can due your small height. Minho walk slowly towards you and you slightly move more backward, until your back find the wall. You're fucked.

You can't properly speak when his hands travel up to your waist, designing your hips with his fingers as he presses your body against the wall harder, "you seem, scared."

"no! no I'm not.. I'm not scared." you mumble as you close lightly your eyes, he's bending slowly lower in your face, his skin smells like disinfectant, "turn on then?"

His low giggle makes you whimper under his eyes and his touch, because it's definitely a yes, he knows. He knows that his actions have a weird power over you, he suddenly moves away from your body making you whine a little louder than expected. "w-why are you teasing me like that!"

His laugh fills the room, making you blush because it's the first time that he doesn't look like an adult, he doesn't look like someone that you should be scared of. He just looks like Minho. "God you are damn cute bun."

˚　　　　✦　　　.　　. 　 ˚　.　　　　　 . ✦　　　 　˚　　　　 . ★⋆.

After that moment he got more and more relaxed, he started to ask you out more and more frequently. He also started to call and text you regularly, using the excuse to make you read his assignments, just to clarify that he didn't made any errors. He's so unaware that you know that's just an excuse to hear from you, but that started to be so normal that you forgot about everything else when Minho comes around. You feel, safe. And he started to feel safe too, he's not hiding under his hood anymore, he smile even more - but only with you, his smile shows bigger with you and your presence around. He looks so, different. He's still your heavy rain, you can't see him otherwise, but the fact that he got closer to you in such a short time makes you feel good. You're not sure to call what you started to have, but your feelings for him are strong enough to make your heart skip a beat when you're walking down the hall from the last class that you just had when his hands cover your eyes, making you jump in surprise. His chuckle reaches your ears, making you blush under his touch, you grab gently his wrists to move his hand down. "I got you again bunny."

"you always get me, min," you chuckle when the guy starts to walk right next to you, his arm around your shoulders as he smiles towards you as you both walk towards the outside, "wanna grab some dinner together?"

You sigh, shaking your head, "sorry, have to work with mom."

"oh, you guys opened the Pizze-?" He starts wondering with his words, not really sure how to really pronounce it, you chuckle as you start to speed up with you walk to pass the green light in time on the sidewalk. "it's Pizzeria, and yes we did. It's hard without my dad but, it's the best that we can do for now."

Minho nods as he walks still beside you not letting you go away from his side, his phone buzz but you're more important right now, "okay then, I'll help."

"you what?"

"h-e-l-p, is it your Italian mind not working today?" he chuckles pressing his index against your forehead, moving you backward move close to his chest. You missed the green light so you stopped walking with the other people, Minho get closer behind you, moving both of his arms on your shoulders. You're so small compare do him, he glances around, like he usually does when he's at work.

His phone buzzes again and you can feel it cause it's in his pocket against your back, "your phone."

"I heard it the first time, still not care about it." he mumbles as he leans his chin on top of your head, the action makes you blush like a teenager. He's getting so touchy in the last period that makes you feel too good to really confess it.

As you guys walk in the green light you can hear a really loud honking, you turn your head just in time before some cobwebs stop the car that was about to crash against you and Minho. Minho moves you behind himself, your tiny body almost disappear behind him.

"Are you okay?" Minho whispers as he holds your shoulders, moving slowly his hands on your cheeks, your surprise and shock stops you from moving every single muscle; you can barely nod as you feel your breath quick up.

That was the first time that you ever saw Spiderman in your life.

TAGLIST -@binnies-binna @ihrtlix @yeahsspider @p0eticjust1c3 @manuosorioh @hanjsquokka @boi-bi-ahaha @im-sinking-in-mud @weareapackofstrays @dprkbyn @cupidcures @i2nsstuff @xtegannoelx @lyramundana @catiuskaa @felinows @5starluvr @kpopsstuffs @xxstrayland @tiapatito202278ok

author note ! I loved writing this chapter so I hope y'all likes it!

[bones4thecats]

Are you still taking requests? If yes, can I request headcanons for Malleus, Deuce, Azul + the Savanaclaw Bois with a reader with a crush in someone from their dorm, but the reader's crush isn't them. It's an NPC. It's ok if you don't want to also

A/N: Apologies, my character limit is 3-4, so I’m just gonna write for the first three you listed! I hope that’s alright, Anon! These are also themed after Enjoy!

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🐉 You had wanted to speak to him about his dorm, so he expected you to maybe confess to him, he had liked you for a while now, but he hadn’t gotten enough courage to tell you

🐉 Malleus listened as you laid a hand on his and asked him about this guy in his dorm named Placide

🐉 Placide was known around Night Raven College for his gentle demeanor, showing a lot of care in his studies and magic improvement

🐉 But, what you said next hurt him

🐉 You liked him?

🐉 No, no he had to have heard you wrong

“ Um- my dear? May you repeat yourself, I believe I heard you wrong. “ “ I kinda think I have a crush on Placide. I just don’t know how to tell him, and I figured since you- y’know, led his dorm you could help? “

🐉 While his heart shattered, he had to put it behind himself, you weren’t his property, he couldn’t just demand you liked him instead of Placide

🐉 Malleus put on his signature smile and gave you the things he had heard from Silver that Placide had liked

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♠️ He had been crushing on you since the day you fought against Riddle’s overblot

♠️ The way you helped MC handle it all by holding his magic back with your own made his heart flutter

♠️ But he just couldn’t tell you his feelings, as whenever he barely thought about it, his face would become as red as Riddle’s!

♠️ Deuce sat by you at lunch when you admitted your crush to his doormate, Everett

♠️ Everett was a very brave and didn’t back down from a fight

♠️ And he could understand why you idolized that, he idolized people like that growing up, but he expected him to be the one you liked

♠️ He was the gentle one, not Everett

♠️ Instead of talking to you about it, he just pushed it below and put you guys first

♠️ Hearing your question of if he would help you, Deuce smiled and gave you the best advice he could give

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🐙 You and him had been friends for years

🐙 You defended him from bullies growing up, and hearing from Jade and Floyd that you may have a crush on someone from Octavinelle, his heart soared

🐙 Azul would be lying if he said he didn’t like you back, you were the perfect person for him!

🐙 You were sweet, kind, and most of all, smart, you could see through his ‘lies’ with ease

🐙 And when he was so close to confessing to you, the words that came out of your mouth hurt him more than any words his childhood bullies could’ve given him

“ I mean, it’s Alicio, for crying out loud! “ “ … oh, Alicio! That guy is such, an amazing, “

🐙 Words flowed through his head; traitor, deceiver, backstabber!

“ Dorm member and classmate! His brains seem to know no end! “

🐙 You saw his smiled was forced and asked if he was truly happy for you, in which he assured you he was, he had just remembered an event he had to plan for Octavinelle that month and he was late on some paperwork

🐙 It was understandable why he was upset, you thought, Alicio wasn’t the perfect guy, but you liked him! Maybe Azul just needed some time to get used to the thought!

[flowerui]

♫ we both like apple cider, pgw

fluff & light angst, 4.1k words ୨୧ first fic on this blog! feedback is appreciated!! ^_^ i've had awful writer's block for MONTHS so i hope i havent gotten too rusty,,,

wherein dancing is your favorite way to destress, until a certain gunwook park goes and spoils it all.

꒰ requested. gender neutral reader (no pronouns or gendered terms used), reader is a year older than gw, dancer reader, bff hanbin, one-sided enemies to friends to lovers, college au, misunderstandings, set in the us, does this count as forced proximity? light angst, fluff (it gets so cheesy idk what happened to me), drinking/underage drinking ꒱

Dancing had always been your favorite way to unwind. After a long day of classes, practice is like a treat; the mental toll of having to listen to your professors drone on all day, and procrastinating assignments until the night they’re due is easily unraveled by dancing until you can’t feel your limbs—it’s unmatched.

That’s why, despite it being Wednesday (the second worst day of the week), you walk out of your last class with a skip in your step, like nothing could ruin your day.

Nothing except a man named Hanbin, that is.

After changing, you enter the practice room, ready to forget your worries. But before you can begin, you see a paper stuck on the wall beside the door—Hanbin must’ve finally put together the choreo for the solo and duet performances for an upcoming recital for some event on campus (truthfully, you can't be bothered to remember all the details, that's Hanbin's job), and decided on who’d best fit the roles. You’re a little late, so it’s just you who curiously shuffles over to take a look.

Seeing your name under Duet makes you smile until you read your counterpart's name. Gunwook Park.

You find a spot to sink to the floor in the back of the room. Suddenly, you’ve changed your perspective on dancing; it’s the worst thing to happen to you. You regret ever discovering this useless passion of yours, who even needs passions in this economy?!

Hanbin would tell you otherwise, but you believe that you have pretty good ideas.

You’d tried to take an easier route and complain to Hanbin that you absolutely could not work with Gunwook for a duet. But he was adamant about not making any alterations at this point, at least not just because you don’t like Gunwook—what a traitor, what happened to friendship?

Since complaining about your unfair working conditions did fuck all, you came up with a wonderful solution. You get paired with the number one person on your shit list? Just don’t show up to rehearsals. Boom, problem solved. Though it’s easier said than done; you’re a creature of habit, and the disappointment of remembering you can’t destress with dance is depressing.

And, of course, avoiding both Hanbin and Gunwook is a chore.

It’s on day four that you consider, maybe Hanbin is right sometimes. You were only successful in avoiding everything except schoolwork because college kicks everyone’s ass, and finding free time starts to feel like finding a needle in a haystack. But, maybe ditching practice when you live with the leader of your dance team wasn’t your best idea. On Sundays, both you and Hanbin usually end up being home at the same time.

And like an idiot, you forget this detail and trudge out of your room at two in the afternoon (no, you certainly did not just wake up, thank you very much) to find something acceptable to eat.

As you’re rummaging through the pantry, you hear your name called in that tone. The one where Hanbin’s voice sounds mildly shrill and a bit patronizing, the one that lets you know you’re in trouble.

Yeah, not your brightest idea—it might take over the number two spot of your top three worst ideas, followed by trying to gaslight a random group of people into believing that Play-doh is edible after you’d had a drink too many at your first college party at number one. (To be fair, you did not expect a twenty-something-year-old man to have Play-Doh on hand and tell you to prove it. Yes, you tried. You vomited on the guy’s shoes.)

Rigidly, you slowly turn to face Hanbin, who has a terse smile on his face.

“...Yes?”

“I thought maybe you hadn’t shown up to rehearsals because you weren’t feeling well, but yesterday, Gunwook told me every time he spotted you on campus, you naruto-ran away.”

“Uh,” you fake cough into your elbow, “Must’ve been someone that looks like me? ‘Cause I have been feeling kind of under the we—”

You shriek and make a run for it when Hanbin stomps over with that creepy hamster puppet you’d given him as a gag gift last year in hand. Eventually, you get cornered and get a creepy hamster puppet thrown in your face. “You can’t just ditch practice because you have some petty one-sided rivalry—or whatever it is—with Gunwook. You’re risking embarrassing the whole team! What are you planning to do, just not learn the choreography?”

“You know it's not a rivalry...” You grumble.

“You’re being childish,” Hanbin sighs, “I’ve already told you that whatever your deal is with Gunwook is some misunderstanding, he’s a sweet guy.”

“Yeah, whatever.” You huff, probably not helping the childish accusation. You’re tired of hearing that about what a good guy Gunwook appears to be because you know what you heard.

Without another word, you stomp off to your room.

If you had any hopes of getting out of going to rehearsal again, they’re promptly stomped on by Hanbin waiting outside of your class when you trudge out.

“Really?” You groan, and walk over to your supposed friend, “You don’t need to escort me.”

“I think I do,” Hanbin crosses his arms, fixing you with a look, like he knows you better than yourself… okay, he does ninety percent of the time, but that doesn’t mean he can act like it. “I’m pretty sure I saw you ready to head in the wrong direction before you saw me.” He says before grabbing your arm and pulling you down the hall.

“I don’t even get what your deal is with Gunwook,” Hanbin finally says when you’re about halfway to the studio, “I know you said you heard him say something… unsavory, but that just doesn’t sound like him at all. I think you should talk to him, I’m sure it’s a misunderstanding.”

“I know what I heard, Bin…”

“I’m not saying you didn’t hear what you heard, but maybe there’s some missing context.”

You try to consider Hanbin’s words, even as you absentmindedly head into the changing rooms, and reluctantly shuffle into the practice room afterward, you truly do. 

But all the rational thinking and breathing techniques in the world cannot quell your ire when you see Gunwook. Calmly walking over and refraining from saying anything uncouth is a true test of mental strength—one that you are quite afraid of failing.

“Hey—” Gunwook rises from his spot in the corner of the practice room to greet you.

“Let’s get started.” You blurt out, aware of how cold and biting your dismissal comes off. To be fair, Hanbin didn’t tell you to be particularly nice, he just insisted you show up.

“Oh, right,” Gunwook’s expression wilts, but he clears his throat and plasters a polite smile on his face. “I’m sure Hanbin already let you know he wouldn’t be here to help us out today—he’s helping Natty with her solo. I’ve got the choreo down, so I should be able to guide you if needed.”

“I practiced at home.”  You did. A little bit, it wasn’t easy with the limited space in your cramped—ahem, homey apartment. But practicing a duet by yourself, then giving up after stubbing your toe on every fucking piece of furniture in your home, and practicing it with your duet partner are two different things.

“Oh, that’s good… um, I’ll start the music.”

Your name is followed by an exasperated sigh. With reluctance—because your phone’s home screen is just that interesting—you glance up from your phone, to see Gunwook eyeing you through the mirror. 

“Could we try to get through the routine? Maybe without you scratching me this time?” Gunwook gnaws at his bottom lip, sweat beading at his temple. He’s actually been hard at work, practicing while you sat in the corner of the room—essentially sentenced to a time-out after accidentally scratching Gunwook every time you tried to run through the routine with him. Accidentally.

You can’t help the frown that sets on your lips. Only to you, it seems, Gunwook Park is an enigma. When he first joined the team, he seemed nice, and he wasn’t much younger than you, you just never got the chance to properly talk to him. However, now you never want to speak to him, the fact that you have to work so closely with him is nauseating.

Tampering down all the ugly word vomit bubbling in your throat, you mentally repeat Hanbin’s words from yesterday to yourself, ‘You’re risking embarrassing the whole team’. Not only do you find most of your teammates to be more than bearable, but you also you can’t bomb a performance because you were too petty to practice the choreography, so, even though the thought of being so close to Gunwook—having to touch him makes you full body cringe, you suck it up.

“Sure.”

Begrudgingly, you get into position and wait for your cue. As the music starts up for what feels like the billionth time that evening, you miss the many nervous glances cast your way.

Succeedingly, you manage to not cause any more bodily harm, even when you have no choice but to get close enough to Gunwook to the point you cannot look anywhere but into his eyes. The urge to flee strikes, as unease among other odd emotions you will not address churn in your gut, but you deal with it (read: ignore it).

You manage to run through the routine once, then again, and again, and again, until your limbs feel like gelatin and you have no option but to sprawl out on the floor. It occurs to you how much you missed this feeling, you can barely believe you let your pettiness get in the way of it.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”

Turning your head to the side, there’s Gunwook, also sprawled out beside you. Huh, you don’t even have the negative energy within you to loathe his presence in the moment.

“You just did. But you can ask one more thing.”

A goofy grin splits Gunwook’s lips before he turns his head back to face the ceiling, expression shifting a little more seriously. “Did I… was there something that I like did? Or said to upset you?”

Oh. Right. So, you haven’t forgotten your distaste for Gunwook. You feel your good mood sour, as you scoff, and force yourself to finally sit up—your limbs are very much protesting, screaming at you, matter of fact, but fuck them. And fuck Gunwook Park. “Seriously?”

You glance over your shoulder, Gunwook, who sat up shortly after you, only blinks at you curiously, as though he hasn’t got a clue.

“You really don’t know? Do you just talk shit about everyone and that’s why you can’t seem to remember me?”

“What…?” Gunwook’s brows furrow, “What are you talking about?”

“I heard you." You push yourself up off the ground, fixing Gunwook with an exasperated look, "After our performance at orientation in August, you had a lot to say about my skill, and how ridiculous I looked.”

“I don't…?” You watch as the confusion and then the recognition passes over Gunwook’s features, “No, I—shit,” he hangs his head with a groan, which doesn’t serve to dissipate any of your arising confusion. “That wasn’t about you.”

“I heard you say my name, don’t bullshit me.”

“I—okay, I definitely said your name, but it seriously wasn’t about you. There was this, um, character in a film my roommate watched for some project; they were supposed to be a dancer, but they were godawful. I was talking about the character, and I didn’t even think about how they had the same name as you, or about how loudly I was talking about that.”

“Oh,” you say, rather intelligently. You consider the thought that he could be lying, but he looks at you with such earnestness, remorse practically pooling in his eyes, you can’t even entertain the thought for more than a moment.

“Yeah, oh. I’m sorry you thought I was talking about you…”

“No, I’m sorry,” you quietly sit back down, anger gone as quick as it arose, and flop back on the floor with a sigh. Having your entire view of Gunwook Park debunked in a mere minute was not on tonight’s bingo card.

“I should’ve—Hanbin kept telling me it was probably a misunderstanding and to confront you, but I just stewed in my misguided hatred. God, Hanbin’s going to be insufferable once I tell him he was right all along.”

Gunwook huffs a laugh, “I’m glad we sorted this out, finally. Um, I guess we should wrap up for tonight since it’s getting late. Can I walk you home?”

“Don’t you live on campus? You don’t have to walk me home if you just have to walk back here…”

“It’s fine!” Gunwook smiles, oddly enthusiastic. Weird, personally, you dread having to walk home after practice. “I want to, and I guess now we can get to know each other? Now that you don’t hate me.”

“Yeah… okay, I’ll grab my stuff.” You sit back up again, as much as you’d like to become one with the floor.

“Okay, cool.”

“Cool.” you can’t help but smile, seeing the wide grin on Gunwook’s face. You’re going to choose to believe the warmth in your cheeks is because you’re still cooling off from rehearsing.

The idea of rehearsing is a lot more palatable now that you don’t despise your duet partner. The actual rehearsals aren’t too bad either… they’re actually kind of enjoyable.

Hanbin was, in fact, very insufferable when you spilled everything that’d happened that day to him. He’d been waiting up for you, sitting on the armchair in your living room, and nearly gave you a heart attack when he flicked on the lamp beside him; like he was your mother and he’d caught you sneaking back in the house.

“Hey, how was class?” Gunwook has taken to waiting for you outside your classes on rehearsal days, you even say hi to each other when you see the other on campus, and maybe talk if you’re not busy.

“Don’t get me started…” you groan, “I have no idea what my professor was on about today, but I thought his jaw was going to unhinge before he finally stopped talking.”

Gunwook chuckles, and grabs your bag from you, cradling it to his chest. “I thought I told you I could carry my bag myself?”

“And I told you that you could try to take it back.” 

You did try, and you decided you do not like freakishly strong guys. “Whatever… what about you? How was your class?”

“Didn’t go today…” Gunwook trails off, glancing down at your linked arms. A habit after losing Hanbin in crowds one too many times. It feels nice with Gunwook, though. “Um, my roommate—” he clears his throat before he continues looking forward, revealing his red ears. Oh, that’s cute.

“He kept me up late ‘cause he needed help with his film project that he’s been procrastinating. I ended up waking up at like one-thirty…”

“Really? So, you just came straight here after waking up?” You tsk, choosing to look away from his pouted lips for your sake. “Did you even eat? Let’s stop by this café a few blocks away before we rehearse. It opened last month, Hanbin and I were supposed to check it out, but I think he forgot.”

You’re not blind, of course, Gunwook is, well, objectively attractive (subjectively as well, perchance). With much coaxing, you might’ve been able to admit it a week ago when you hated him. But, his attractiveness is far too illuminated when you’re a mere inches from his face; faced with his distractingly pretty brown eyes, and rosy cheeks. Oh God, he’s cute. He’s so fucking cute, and you are so fucking screwed.

Before you can say something so embarrassing you’d have to migrate to another country and assume another identity, you take the initiative to part from Gunwook, carefully backing away, and clearing your throat, “Should we take a break?”

Except that doesn’t even help, because when you sink to the floor to watch YouTube, Gunwook is beside you, smushed at your side to watch whatever you’re watching. You can’t even remember what video you tapped on, but apparently, you’re seven minutes into a video when Gunwook reaches over to pause it.

“Hey, um, one of my friends—his name’s Junhyeon, his frat, Zeta Rho Xi is having a party this weekend. He kinda roped me into going, and I was just wondering if you were free…? I would, um, it’d be cool if you could stop by.”

Parties haven’t been your thing for a long time; you tried to party freshman year, since people seemed to go on about the college parties. You just couldn’t get super into it, plus only things like the Play-Doh incident came from parties… and that’s why you’re not sure why you say, “Yeah, no, I should be free. I’ll check it out.”

You aren't even free, you have an essay you’ve written approximately two sentences for that happens to be due Monday. But the smile on Gunwook’s face makes agreeing feel like the right choice.

Immediately upon stepping inside, you remember why you hate parties. One, you lose Hanbin instantly. Two, trying to push through a bunch of sweaty, drunk people (who are surprisingly sturdy) is a pain in the ass. And three, it’s loud, you already feel like you need a drink. Or maybe three.

You manage to make it to a mostly empty kitchen, and at that point, you’ve lost any motivation to go search for Hanbin or even Gunwook. For the most part, you’ve given up caring about being ‘lame’, so, you’re perfectly content sitting in the kitchen on your phone at a party while sipping on possibly the worst quality beer you’ve tasted in your twenty years of life.

It’s maybe thirty minutes until you finally look up from your phone at the call of your name over the ear-damaging volume of music.

Hanbin stumbles into the kitchen, using Gunwook as support. You can make out your friend’s flushed cheeks, even in the dim lighting, you have no idea how he’s gotten drunk so fast. “There you are! I found Gunwookie, it looked like he was waitin’ around for you, ‘cause he was just in a corner lookin’ around… didn’t you guys exchange numbers?”

“I already told you I forgot to ask…” Gunwook mumbles.

“Oh,” Hanbin lets go of Gunwook to slide up beside you, “Hey, did you know that, um—” Gunwook rushes over to slap a hand over Hanbin’s mouth, are they both drunk? It’s more difficult to tell with Gunwook, his cheeks always look pink…

Hanbin removes Gunwook’s hand with a glare, “Don’t interrupt me,” he chides, as sternly as he can while drunk. “Anyway, ‘m so glad you two figured things out. I hope Gunwook tells you about his massive heart boner for you.”

Hanbin makes it probably ten times worse by continuing, “He’s—he’s had such a big crush on you since like, um, since like the millisecond he joined the team. But this whole time you thought he was mean to you, isn’t that silly?”

What isn’t silly is the look on Gunwook’s face, he looks positively mortified.

“...Okay, Bin, I think you’re ready to go home already,” you smile tersely, side-stepping the topic for now, maybe forever actually. “Gunwook, can you help me with him?” You ignore Hanbin’s slurred protests. It must take a moment for Gunwook to recoup before he’s at Hanbin’s other side, helping you pull the drunkard up.

You avoid looking in Gunwook’s direction, despite the fact you can feel him burning holes into the side of your head. Of course, there’s no avoiding the conversation—inevitably, you’re going to have to talk to Gunwook about what Hanbin said, but maybe you can get out of it tonight…?

It’s not that you’re particularly afraid… okay, well, you are, except it’s just unnecessary anxiety. Now you feel better about admitting to yourself that you’re interested in Gunwook. But what if Hanbin’s drunk rambling was just drunk rambling, and it was all nonsense? Well, Gunwook probably wouldn’t seem so nervous if that were the case, but maybe he’s nervous because he just doesn’t want you to be under the impression that he—

“Oh, hey, I’ve been looking everywhere for Hanbin…”

“Oh, Hao, hey.” you mentally thank Hao for unknowingly rescuing you from spiraling into your annoyingly irrational train of thought.

“Do you want me to take him off your hands? We were planning to ditch before he disappeared.”

Okay, time to put on your big person pants and be an adult. “Yeah, thanks.” Handing Hanbin off is pretty easy, the man completely unbothered that he’s thrown two of his protégés for a loop (he’ll probably feel a lot worse about it tomorrow, especially when he’s hungover). What’s less easy, is being left with Gunwook.

“Well, since Hanbin aired everything out…”

“Right, yeah. We should talk, maybe outside?”

Gunwook nods, leading the way to the back door, you follow closely behind him. As not to lose him in the clusters of people, and maybe just because you want to, you grab onto his arm.

Outside, your eardrums thank you for finally getting out of there, though your nervous heart is another story, rattling against your ribcage incessantly. Warily, you avoid looking at Gunwook, distancing yourself a good few feet away from him, “So…”

“I like you,” Gunwook blurts as if he won’t get another chance to say so, “like a lot. I initially joined the team ‘cause of you actually, I hadn’t even danced since middle school. But you were so—watching you on stage at orientation felt so… enchanting.”

Heat rushes to your cheeks at Gunwook’s flattery, and he only continues, “I thought you were perfect, so obviously I immediately signed up for the dance team, even though I wasn’t even sure if I was any good at it anymore, just so I could have an excuse to see you. Only for me to never gain the courage to even talk to you…” Staring at the wooden planks of the porch beneath your feet, you see Gunwook’s beaten-up Converse come into view, urging you to look up again.

“Gunwook, I—”

“It’s okay if you don’t feel anything like that for me, I just can’t let the what-ifs get in the way of me trying anymore.” Oh, how could you not feel something for him? Surely anyone could fall for him just by staring into his pretty brown eyes.

The weird feeling in your gut, which must be those butterflies people talk about, amplifies, you think you’d have to be a fool if you didn’t feel something for Gunwook Park. “I don’t… not feel something,” you hastily avert your gaze, “I guess I’m not entirely sure what it is, but I am interested in you. I, um, would be open to exploring that.”

“I understand—wait, you… really?”

You look up in time to see the overjoyed grin split Gunwook’s lips. It’s infectious, you can’t help but mirror his smile, laugh tumbling past your lips, “Yes, you dork. You better sweep me off my feet.”  You playfully shove at his shoulder.

“I will,” Gunwook grabs your wrist before you drop your arm, thumbing at the inside of it, “are you free tomorrow?”

“I…” You aren’t free, remember that pesky essay of yours? “Yeah, I am.” Oh, well, you suppose it can wait; likely until tomorrow night, when you finally open your laptop at eleven-thirty at night, when it happens to be due at midnight. You happen to work great under pressure!

“Perfect, can I pick you up at your place at two?”

“Sure, are you gonna remember to ask for my number this time, though?” You tease, making a ‘give me’ motion with your free hand.

Gunwook’s cheeks somehow get pinker, as he finally lets go of your wrist and retrieves his phone from his pocket, handing it over with the new contact screen open. Quickly, you type in your number and then your name, cheekily adding a heart beside it.

“Can I walk you home? Or, uh, if you wanted to go back to the party, that’s fine too…”

“Nah,” you’d rather do just about anything else than go back into that mess, you’ve had enough parties for the rest of your college life, “I’m pretty tired, and I have a super important date with a great guy tomorrow.”

With a coy smile to match Gunwook’s shy one, you cozy up to his side and link arms with him, “Let’s go?”

You’d still consider dancing to be a great way to unwind—still one of your favorites, it's just been demoted to second place.

Nothing ebbs away your stress like Gunwook popping into your room with your favorite food after you’ve been staring at your laptop screen for hours as if you were hoping your assignments would finish themselves. Or his hugs—always so warm, it’s like hugging an oversized stuffed bear. Or just… him.

Unrivaled after several years, dancing has finally met its match: Gunwook Park.

[theholypeanut]

Otoya Eita x Forced Proximity

Peanut’s Wheel of Fortune Event

Cw: Otoya is a cw on its own, slight nsfw themes but no actual smut so 16+(voyeurism), suggestive, Otoya is taller than the reader, Yukimiya having a girl crush, gn!reader, 1,5 k words

Plot: You didn’t expect to get stuck in a closet with Otoya, and having to listen your friend getting handsy with his crush…

Event Masterlist

Otoya has been annoying you for a date since you started college. 

You had a couple of classes together, and even if you did not click with him right away, you and Yukimiya (one of his closest high school friends he went to college with) vibed very well. Unfortunately in your second year, you and Kenyu had fewer classes together, and instead you had to spend almost every day with Otoya Eita. And even worse he took it as a sign from god that he has a chance with you.

At first, you were absolutely not interested in any interactions with him, as he constantly tried to use the most obnoxious pickup lines on you. As time went on and you were forced into the same places together, you found out that he could actually be quite funny too. Even better, he was an amazing gossip buddy - you could always count on him to have the spiciest pieces of information on campus, and you tried not to be any worse. After a while, you could say that you kind of considered him a friend, just a very… flirty one. 

Because you ended up in a similar group of friends, you were also going to parties together. 

For the past months with Eita you’ve been trying to get Kenyu together with this girl from his English literature classes, that he would never admit that he had a crush on. To be honest he never asked you for help, even more, he even told you specifically to „stay away and not try to stir anything” but both you and Otoya were not the type to listen to his suggestions. Like, what could be wrong? If he couldn’t get together with her till now, maybe he just needs a little help? What are friends for?

And you really tried to be the best wingmen he could think of. “Accidentally” asking him to go to places she was in, always ordering coffee from the cafe she worked at, especially during her shifts, invite her on their matches… nothing worked. Yukimiya was just so dense.

This time again, nothing went as planned. It was a Friday night and you went to this huge party thrown in a building looking like a villa. The vibe seemed good, and most importantly: The Crush was also there. But something just felt off.

First of all, Yukimiya for the first time ever was drinking. At the beginning seeing him with a red plastic cup made you and Eita send each other knowing glances. It was very suspicious, especially since Kenyu always joked that he is a „sober friend” who takes care of everyone. He was, in fact, a mom friend at his finest. 

You started to look around if maybe the Pretty Literature Girl is somewhere around, and she was indeed talking to some basketball jock in the corner of the room. You could almost hear her giggling from across the room. Otoya was fast to keep up and after exchanging some secret hand gestures, he came over to Kenyu. 

„You know, for me, it feels like tonight is the night” he said and patted his friend. „You should talk to her, as you are already a little tipsy”

„I'm not tipsy” Kenyu said defensively and looked in the direction of his crush. „I don’t think there's a point.” You fast step up to the conversation, and put an arm around your tall friend. 

„Look you will never know if you won't try! Maybe she just tries to make you jealous?”

In an answer, Yukimiya only sighed and drank all of the remaining alcohol in his cup in one sip. Seeing him so gloomy made you wonder if maybe this is the type of drunk he is going to be. You felt a hand on your arm and after looking around, you saw Otoya suggesting you to go upstairs to retrieve. It was very loud in the dancing area, so without trying to yell over the music, you left your sad friend and left with a white-haired up the stairs. 

It was a big house, and you had no idea who it belonged to (Maybe Reo, the rich kid?) but the upper area was full of doors. It was still quite loud in the corridor, so Otoya opened the door to, what looked like, one of the bedrooms. You followed him there and closed the door. 

„I don't think our plan will work today” you said and sighed. „Yukimiya looks like he will start crying and talking about his childhood traumas any moment, I’m actually kind of scared of what will happen if he keeps drinking”

„Yeah, it’s really not looking good for him” Otoya nodded. „I'm pretty sure he is also more drunk than us, which is an entirely different kind of issue. I don’t think I ever saw him drinking.”

You were about to answer, when you heard a familiar voice coming from outside the door. Was it…. Kenyu’s crush? You looked at Otoya in panic, and without thinking he grabbed your hand and pulled you inside the spacious closet in the room. 

Well, it looked spacious from the outside, when the two of you fit inside, you could feel Otoya’s entire body hugging your back. 

„Move!” You whispered to him, feeling a weird tingling in your stomach from the sudden closeness. He leaned closer to your ear and his breath was tickling your neck. 

„I can’t. Just wait, maybe they won’t…” and then you heard the door to the bedroom open and close. 

„I thought you’ll never talk to me tonight” you two heard the girl. 

„Well you looked really busy with that guy…” you couldn’t believe when you recognised familiar voice. 

„Mmmm, Kenyu, are you jealous?” She purred teasingly, in a way that even you blushed. 

„Maybe” you heard your friend teasing her back. You didn’t have to see anything to know the tension between this two was very high. The girl giggled, and you could hear a sound of a kiss. Your body tensed up. 

„You know I’m yours” she said so quietly you could barely hear. You felt Otoya’s hand touching your waist and you tried to turn your head to him without making any sound. „Are they…” you whispered as quietly as you could when the sound going from outside of the closet answered your question: there was a heavy making-out session going on right outside the closet door. 

You thought you could not get more uncomfortable until you heard the girl moaning your friend’s name. What made the situation even worse is that not only you were stuck to listen to your friend getting all steamy with his crush, but you also could feel Otoya’s getting more and more aroused, as you assumed feeling a sudden pressure around your ass. 

„I’m sorry” you heard him whimper in your ear, which sent a shiver down your spine. You heard another loud moan and Yukimiya’s groans, as you assume he was kissing her neck. Well, you couldn’t really be mad at Eita right now. You turned to look at him to say something, but as your faces were so close to each other you could feel his nose brushing your cheek, you heard a sudden noise of an opening door. 

„Oooh fuck!” You heard some male voice from outside. „Sorry, I was looking for a bathroom…” 

The sudden noise made you jump and for a split second, you could feel Otoya’s lips on yours, before you turned back to face the door. From the sound of it you felt like Yukimiya and his situationship decided to stop after the sudden entrance. The door closed again and you heard Kenyu clearing his throat. 

„How about we get out of here?” He suggested. „I will just text my friends I’m too drunk and that I ordered the taxi home…” The girl giggled. 

„I don't know why you won't just tell them that we are dating” she answered. You heard Yukimiya sigh and with your imagination you knew he was massaging his temples with annoyance. „They are just so noisy and dramatic… I will tell them, one day” 

After that, the only sound going out of the room was the door opening and closing. You waited a couple of seconds, to be sure they wouldn't be coming back, and then you opened the door and walked out of the closet. 

There was an awkward silence between you two, as you felt too embarrassed to address what would have happened if both you and Yukimiya hadn’t been interrupted. 

Otoya cleared his throat. 

„I cannot believe he was keeping it a secret saying we are annoying” You smirked with relief after this comment. 

„I cannot believe Yukimiya almost hooked up with someone at a party… without closing the door.”

The atmosphere felt a little less tense. 

„I think we should leave this room before someone will think that we are here for…” you didn’t end the sentence, a little embarrassed. You saw Eita blushing before he looked away.

„Yeah right. Wouldn’t want to be cockblocked like that…” As you put your hand on the doorknob, you felt Otoya standing right behind you, as he put his forearm on the door right above your head. 

„We would at least close the door on a lock, right?” He said right to your ear.

You stood there for a second, feeling your heart speeding up to a dangerous pace. Your face felt hot when you turned the lock on the door. 

„…Right”

Bonus

[authorxxxxxx]

Jitterbug | Bayverse!Optimus Prime x fem!human!reader

Pairing : Bayverse!Optimus Prime x fem!human!reader ( she is Sam's younger sister )

Summary : At first she was the exact same as her brother Sam , but after some tragic events she became a little bit distant . But when he came - she was confused . She did not know how to react when she realized that she loved him . When him and the Autobots landed on the Planet Earth , he expected humans like Sam to be intrigued by them , what he did not expect was to fall in love for a certain girl with bright blue eyes.

Tw : mental health issues , diagnosis of illness , angsty feelings , a very concerned Ratchet , confused Optimus , parents stupidity , but fluff at the end.

English is not my first language so if you spot any mistakes please just bare with me .

Ps : I got away with this one because OPTIMUS DESERVES SOME LOVE , but I really enjoyed it so I hope you do too .

Edit : I think it is so bad for some reason . Some people will say that the song does not fit with the imagine , but I think it is better this way .

11k words

______________________________________________________________

Let's just say that your first encounter with the Autobots was not like you've imagined it to be .

Not that you've ever imagined about meeting extremely tall and big aliens that can turn into cars .

You've never imagined that you'll fall in love for the leader of the Autobots when you first saw him either .

It was a cold night in the early days of October when you and your older brother Sam got into a really big fight .

Things got even worse when your parents came upstairs to calm you both , but instead of doing that they intervened and the situation escalated .

From arguing with your brother about something that you both forgot after a while , to both be arguing with your parents about literally anything .

Their criticism about Sam's progress in school that was not so good , how you were being a not so helpful person because of your mental health issues .

" How much more oblivious can you both be ? Sam do you even realise how much money we are going to spend for your college if you do not graduate form High School with at least decent grades ? "

Your father had told your brother , but he did not answered .

He believes that in situations likes this one - silence is the best option.

But when your mother turned to you . . . Sam saw red .

" And you Y/N haven't we spent enough money for your therapy ? Buying pills every God damn month ? It happened long ago , you should have been able to forget it by now . I mean , it is like you are doing it on purpose ."

He immediately grabbed your right wrist and dragged you out of your house .

Your parents yelling at you to come back at the house immediately or else -

That is how you found yourselves in the middle of nowhere eating McDonald's and drinking coffee inside his car .

Dad bought him a yellow Camaro with black details a couple of days ago , but he was experiencing some weird problems with it .

The most common one - the radio turned all the time on its own .

You loved it .

And so did Sam that night .

The radio was playing some funny jokes to help you both forget the ugly situation back at the house .

Uncontrollably laughing you did not hear a big track changing its form to a 22ft alien robot .

Optimus Prime thought that Bumblebee was still into his alt - form just because he enjoyed it .

The thing is that Bee was so happy that you both were laughing at the jokes , that he did not even noticed his leader looking down at him .

" Mother of Primus . Are you even listening to to me ? " Optimus Prime asked a little louder this time and Bee frozed in his spot .

When Optimus realized that Bee had passengers inside the car he left a breath he did not know he was holding .

Bee opened his doors slowly telling you to get out before he could change into his original form .

Both you and Sam were shocked beyond repair .

Bee was looking down embarrassed when Optimus kneeled on the ground to take a better look at you - both .

Coming close to your faces he asked :

" Are you Samuel Witwicky descedant of Archibald Witwicky?"

" Yeah . " Sam had answered holding at you like a teddy bear .

" My name is Optimus Prime . We are autonomous robotic organisms from the planet Cybertron . "

" But you can call us Autobots for short . " Another one said .

Where did he come from ?

" What's cracking little biches ? This looks like a cool place to kick it . " Another one asked .

You heard yourself silently laughing .

" My first lieutenant the designating Jazz . " You heard Optimus deep voice saying .

" How you learnde to talk like that ? " Sam asked smiling .

" We learned Earth's languages through the World Wide Web . " Optimus answered while looking at you .

Shocked by his piercing blue eyes , you did not realised that another bot had said that your levels were unstable and your body was asking for some rest .

Sam looked worryingly at you .

" And you are ? " Optimus asked you .

" Huh ? " You asked him lost in his eyes .

" She is my younger sister Y/N . " Sam had answered for you .

Suddenly you heard George Michael's voice in Bee's speakers .

" You put the boom - boom into my heart

" You send my soul hig - sky

" When your lovin' starts "

Ratchet the medical's officer had stoped Bee with what it seems to be a laser .

Optimus tried to save you both from embarrassed when he properly introduced to Sam that Bee was his guardian .

And while Ironhide and Jazz were both not interested in the conversation , Ratchet decided to tell his leader that you needed a guardian too .

He offered to become yours so he can have you close by his side since of your unstable health levels but Optimus decided otherwise .

__________

Ratchet was never more anxious and afraid in his whole entire robotic life .

After their first encounter with you and your brother , he soon realized that Sam was the type of guy that tried to fing good in every bad situation . He was alaways happy and funny . Laughing at everything him and Bee did .

You on the other side were more close , introvert , sometimes you spent to many hours of the day alone , you had sleepless nights , you found peace in listening to 80's and 90's music in your earphones .

And of course he had realized that you and Optimus - your guardian had a think for each other .

Everyone seemed to know except you two .

Although after the war between the Autobots and the Decepticons you reached your breaking point .

__________

Anxiety and panic attacks , insomnia , sleepless nights , nightmares , constant fight with your parents , Sam's abstinence , Ratchet's healt questions , Bee's teasing about you and Optimus - Optimus .

You can not lie .

You two were closer that anyone else .

Ironhide believed that your bond was even stronger that the one of Sam and Bee's .

You loved him - more that n just love actually .

You could not imagine your life without the big bot .

And when one day were you were at your worst , Optimus did not returned home that night chasing after some Decepticons , you thought that he was dead .

Only Sam knew why .

You left the compound that night crying and when Optimus returned and did not found you , he knew that he was in deep trouble .

Sam told everyone the truth .

One year ago you had lost forever your bestfriend right in front of your eyes .

The memory was just too much for you and you slowly started getting depressed .

When the therapist diagnosed you with it it was too late you were already deep within it .

Sam told Optimus that you liked him .

And after that Optimus knew what he had to do .

__________

You heard the big truck coming to a stop and after a couple of seconds the sounds of Optimus changing from his alt - form .

" Are you alright Jitterbug ? " Optimus Prime asked you coming closer to you .

Jitterbug . . .

The nickname Optimus had given you after he found out that the song Bee used was your favorite .

Wake my up before you go by Wham!

Your silence made him even more worried .

"Sam told us what is going on and I wanted to say that . . .

I'm sorry Y/N .

If I realized sooner maybe I could have find a way to help you . " He said .

" It's not your fault Optimus . " You finally said to him , voice hoarse from crying .

When you looked up at him - even in the dark night sky he could see your red eyes .

Oh Sweetspark . . . he thought .

He placed his left servo on the ground near you .

After a couple of seconds you hopen up while he was briging you closer to his face .

" Y/N I would like to confess something to you that I hope it will not jeopardize the relationship with have build up . Sam told me - " Before he could complete whatbhe wanted to say you interrupted him .

" Did Sam told you that I like you ? " You asked , tears already building in your eyes .

" Is it not true ? " Optimus asked you .

" No it's not like that . Look you are Optimus Prime . You are a Prime . The leader of the Autobots . And I'm me . Just me . " You said . Taking it of your chest .

" That doesn't meen anything Y/N you humans have helped us with so much that we can call your planet Earth home . And in my home your in too . I am willing to help you get through your pain my Sweetspark . " He confessed to you .

" I thought I was your Jitterbug . " You said to him while placing your hands to his face plate pressing your lips in his dermas .

He stared in your blue eyes , the ones he grew to love so much .

" What do you think about going back to the compound ? It's about to rain and it's a long drive . " He said and slowly he transformed back to his al - form placing you inside his cabin .

" Can you please put our song ? " Your sweet voice asked him and he for sure did it with happiness .

Wake me up before you go by Wham! was playing .

Your song .

__________

" Y/N your back . Is everything okay ? " Your older brother Sam asked you once he saw you .

" I am going to kill you . " You said to him while running to catch him .

Sam started to scream for help while Bee and Jazz seem to enjoy the moment .

" Primus . What is going on ? " Ironhide asked Optimus but before he could answer Ratchet showed up .

" Well at least her levels indicate that she is doing better . Someone save Sam , his stress levels are duplicated .

__________

@unimportantbabymilksharkte

@k----a27s

[ginnsbaker]

In Losing Grip On Sinking Ships (12/22)

Chapter summary: Wanda and her therapist discuss the topic of forgiveness; During a 6-miler running event, Kate accuses you of forcing Yelena to stay away from her; after which you find Wanda and her new friend in the same event

Chapter word count: 6k | Warnings: None | Ship: Wanda x Reader, Yelena x Reader

Author's note: Enjoy :)

AO3 | Masterlist 

Next Chapter: Thirteen

--

Twelve

The heavy raindrops dance in an intricate rhythm upon the streets of New York City, as Wanda’s gaze returns to Dr. Calliope Williams. She is seated opposite her, wearing the kind expression that always soothes Wanda in an unexplainable way. Mid-sentence, while sharing an anecdote about her time with you in college, she realizes you’ve been the topic (yet, again) for a while now.

"I've been going on about her too much, haven't I?" Wanda looks down at her hands, her fingers woven together.

“We can discuss whatever is on your mind, Wanda. I’m just here to listen and help you navigate those thoughts.” Calliope assures her with a warm smile.

As Wanda observes the gentle patter of rain on everything it touches, a question lingers in her mind. “Do you think she’ll ever forgive me?” she wonders aloud.

“What makes you think she hasn’t?” Calliope asks.

"She’s moved on," Wanda argues, cracking her knuckles and twisting each of her fingers almost painfully. The bitter memories of your anger, the hurt she endured during those stormy weeks, remain vivid, imprinted on her soul. She can't erase the cruel image of you leaving her half-naked in her own bedroom as she pleads with you to stay.

None of your actions back then gave any indication that you wanted to forgive her.

“She's found someone new, someone who can give her the love and stability and trust I failed to provide. How can forgiveness exist in the face of that?" Wanda asks.

“It isn't bound by the presence or absence of a romantic relationship, Wanda. It transcends those circumstances. It’s about ultimately granting yourself and others the freedom to heal and move forward,” Calliope explains softly. “But, going back to your question, I’m afraid Y/N’s the only person who can answer that for you.”

“I know that. But I can’t really talk to her about it, can I? If I wanted to upset her, I definitely could.” Wanda sort of chuckles towards the end, her shoulders slumping slightly. All the amicable conversations she’s had with you over the past months were expertly navigated to avoid dredging up your shared, painful past.

"When the time is right and when both of you are ready to discuss it respectfully, you can approach her," Calliope tells her.

"And what if she never forgives me?" Wanda's voice trembles, recognizing how plausible that could be. "What if I've irreparably damaged what we had, what we could have been?"

Calliope leans in, underlining the gravity of her following words. "Wanda, it's important to recognize that you cannot control Y/N’s response or dictate the path of forgiveness for her. What you can do is show genuine regret, reflect on your actions, and strive for personal growth."

Uncertainty looms, casting a dark shadow. Being in control is one of life’s biggest illusions, and Wanda has fallen into its trap more times than she could count.

Pausing thoughtfully, Calliope tilts her head and says, "Wanda, I'd like to ask you something."

Wanda glances up, surprised to find her fingers clenched tightly into a fist. "What is it?" she asks.

"Do you believe you deserve forgiveness?"

The question hangs in the air, pregnant with implication. The rain outside seems to intensify, echoing the tumultuous emotions swirling within Wanda. 

"I... I'm not sure," Wanda confesses after a beat. "I don't think I would forgive myself if I were her." A lone tear escapes her eye, streaking down her cheek, paralleling a raindrop sliding down the windowpane.

Calliope makes a noncommittal sound and then gracefully adjusts the glasses perched on her nose.

"Have you ever thought about forgiving your mother?" It carries a gentle curiosity–a clear footnote that there’s no right or wrong answer–delicately drawing parallels between Wanda's own experiences of betrayal and the concept of forgiveness itself.

“What does she have to do with this?” Wanda asks, her demeanor shifting instantly to a guarded stance.

“From what you told me before, your mother cheated on your father several times before she left you and the rest of your family. And your father, heartbroken, turned to substance abuse,” Calliope breaks off for a moment, knowing how being reminded of her tragic childhood continues to weigh heavily on Wanda. 

“And that ultimately led to his death. Have you ever thought about forgiving your mother?” Calliope repeats the question.

Wanda's hollow grin etches the lines of bitter irony on her face.

“You can’t exactly forgive someone who isn’t asking for it, can you?” she retorts.

"You're right, Wanda," Calliope acknowledges, something akin to sadness in her tone. "It… It is a multifaceted process, and it becomes even more compounded when the person who has hurt us doesn't seek forgiveness or acknowledge their actions. It leaves us grappling with unresolved emotions and longing for clarity."

Calliope leans back in her chair, her eyes never leaving Wanda's face, contemplating the layers of complexity woven into their conversation. Wanda, on the other hand, looks suddenly withdrawn. Calliope can sense that her attention is divided, as is often the case when the conversation delves into her complicated relationship with her mother.

“Have you decided to answer her letters like I’ve suggested?” she asks Wanda, trying her best to seek out her avoidant gaze and rope her back to the present.

Wanda mumbles a no, face straight and devoid of any emotion.

“At least think about it,” she urges mildly. “It doesn’t have to be today or tomorrow, or even next week. However, the longer you ignore the unresolved feelings you harbor towards your mother, the more profound your resentment may grow.”

Confusion flashes across Wanda's face, her brows knitting together in frustration. “I don’t understand why she needs to seek a relationship with me. She’s managed to deceive at least one of us. Pietro talks to her all the time.” Wanda states, her voice strained with a venom she can barely hold back.

Calliope's gaze softens as she considers Wanda’s statement. "Wanda, we have to keep in mind that everyone's choices and behaviors are influenced by their own unique circumstances and motivations. Although I can't speak directly to your mother's specific reasons, it's possible that her wish to reconnect with both you and Pietro comes from a place of seeking forgiveness and reconciliation."

Wanda’s face burns at the thought that her mother is capable of repentance. "But why both of us? Why not just focus on rebuilding a relationship with one child? It feels like she wants to have it all, to mend what she broke without fully understanding the consequences of abandoning her children."

Calliope observes the tension in Wanda's body, sensing that her resentment somehow also spills over to her brother who has chosen to keep a steady connection with their mother despite both of them experiencing the pain of her leaving. She can sense that Wanda feels a little betrayed by his decision, and somewhat insecure that in this situation, he’s come out to be the bigger person between them.

"I wish I could understand," Wanda murmurs, eyes falling shut. "She abandoned us when we were so young, leaving scars that still ache. How can I reconcile the desire for closure with the fear of being hurt all over again?"

Calliope gives her a meaningful glance, as if Wanda has unknowingly stumbled upon a puzzle piece.

Following a few silent moments, Wanda connects the dots with a look of remorse.

“Is… Is this how Y/N feels about me?”

Calliope nods slowly. “It’s possible,” she says. “Just as you struggle to reconcile your desire for closure with the fear of being hurt again, Y/N might be going through similar emotions. The pain caused by betrayal runs deep, and it can be difficult to trust again, even when the desire is there.”

Wanda's eyes shimmer with regret. "I never wanted to hurt her," she whispers. “I thought if–if I simply put a stop to it and she never finds out, I–”

“I know. But it’s human nature. We are disillusioned when it comes to control. We convince ourselves that as long as we're in control, we can evade the fallout of our actions," Calliope explains.

“Other people will never make the same stupid mistake in their lifetime.” Wanda points out, feeling a sudden envy towards those who have easily exemplified unwavering loyalty.

"None of us are immune to mistakes, Wanda," Calliope reminds her. "While it may feel as though others have effortlessly avoided the same missteps, every individual has their own struggles and battles. The path is unique for each of us.”

Wanda nods, feeling a little comforted by what she’s hearing.

Calliope slowly rises from her chair, her movements purposeful as she makes her way towards the desk adorned with a pen and a notebook. She’s eager to jot down her notes while the session is still fresh.

“And as much as I want to continue this, our time is up. Shall we reconvene next week?" Calliope proposes.

Wanda, caught between a sigh and a fleeting smile, agrees to the schedule. "Sure, Next week."

She hadn’t once thought that understanding her own feelings could lead to insights on yours. It makes her more than eager to keep working on herself.

***

It’s still dark out as you stand amidst a sea of runners at the starting line of a 6-miler event being held in Central Park. 

You’ve been looking forward to this the entire week, and have been rigorous in your preparation, getting up at four in the morning just so you can squeeze in your training plan despite a busy schedule at work. Aiming for nothing short of a personal record for this run, you start doing some drills on the side, getting your heart up to speed and your muscles warm. It’s a relatively cold morning, a long-sleeved shirt provides just the right amount of warmth, and the leggings you wear are rather thick, but still offer flexibility with every stride.

As you’re nearing the end of your warm-up, a familiar silhouette approaches you, their features barely discernible in the dim lighting.

“What did you tell her? Did you tell her to stay away from me?” The voice demands, causing you to straighten up. Kate maintains a jog in place, looking rather uncomfortable in her windrunner, but it’s obvious that the scowl she’s wearing has nothing to do with the freezing temperatures.

“What are you talking about?” you ask, your breath forming a visible fog as you speak.

“Yelena initiated a transfer to another team,” she mutters impatiently. “And she requested a different mentor as well.”

The blaring sound of the alarm kicks off the countdown before they release the runners. Runners around you start to position themselves, their focus shifting to the commencement of the race. 

"Yelena did what? I... I had no idea..." you say absentmindedly, your voice tapering off as you feel a sudden jostle from someone pushing past you in the queue. Honestly, you don’t understand what’s so concerning about Yelena making changes in her career.

“She’s putting her career in jeopardy. First of all, everyone on her new team is going to treat her as a competition because despite being a junior, she has already won an industry award. They'll be gunning for her, ready to undermine her success. And to make matters worse, her new mentor lacks the journalistic expertise she deserves. He's essentially the epitome of political maneuvering within the company.” Kate bombards you with her reasoning, just as the starting gun pierces the air, signaling that the 6-miler has started. 

“Y/N! Are you even listening–”

On instinct, your feet hit the pavement in quick, measured steps, leaving Kate just a few meters behind as you stare blankly ahead. You had anticipated the weather and conditions of this race; what you didn’t see coming was finding out that in an effort to safeguard your relationship, Yelena had taken drastic measures, making a move that you had neither requested or approved of. Not that she needs your approval on such things, but you didn’t want to be the reason if it happens that the recent developments derails her career. And seeing how Kate has been nothing but respectful of Yelena’s decision to be with you and stay friends with her, it’s quite unthinkable for Yelena to do such a thing. 

Though what’s troubling you the most is the realization that she's willing to make such sacrifices very early on, believing you to be deserving of them. Deep down, you find it hard to accept such unwavering dedication from her—or from anyone, for that matter.

As you push your body forward, immersed in the run, you fail to check your watch and follow your pace. Lost in your own thoughts, the race passes by in a blur, and before you know it, Kate is emerging from out of nowhere, sprinting all of a sudden to finish ahead of you. You both cross the finish line a mere five seconds apart. 

As the organizing team places the coveted finisher's medal around your neck, you duck your head in humble acceptance before making a beeline for the hydration stations. The cool liquid cascades down your throat, replenishing your parched body after the arduous race. Kate trails closely behind, her breaths coming in ragged gasps.

"Y/N," Kate calls out through the post-race commotion. She regrets a little that she attempted to outpace you, pushing herself beyond her intended limits in a bid to reach the finish line ahead. Glancing at your watch, a smile unconsciously graces your lips as its record of your run confirms that you have indeed beaten your personal best. With the task of reaching your goal out of the way, you turn to Kate and finally acknowledge her.

“I’m sorry, I was aiming for a specific finish time,” you murmur as your smile turns strained. “I didn’t mean to literally run away from the conversation earlier.”

"It's all good," Kate gasps, a hint of discomfort evident in her voice as she tries to catch her breath. "But seriously, how on earth are you able to carry on a conversation like nothing happened? You just ran that entire distance at an incredible pace!"

You offer a lighthearted chuckle. “What do you mean? You beat me at the finish line!”

"Yeah, and look where it got me," Kate mumbles, her words punctuated by labored breathing. "I think I’m gonna pass out…"

“Whoa, there,” you stammer, concern flickering across your face as you reach out, gently grasping her elbow to guide her away from the bustling crowd. Kate allows herself to be led to a quieter spot where she can find some relief. Then, to alleviate the tightness in her breathing, she unzips her jacket, allowing fresh air to circulate and provide some respite.

"So, about Yelena..." you say, finding a bench and settling down in a cross-legged position. The weight of the news still lingers, leaving you unsure of where to begin.

"I assume you two have talked about me and..." Kate gestures wildly with her hands.

"We did," you affirm. "And if my memory serves me right, I simply suggested for her to give you some space.”

"Dude, why would I need space? What more space could I ask for since she moved out of our place?" Kate retorts, sounding slightly exasperated.

The word "our" catches your attention. It’s exactly why you think Kate needs space. Now that you’re aware of the depth of her feelings for your girlfriend, it’s not hard to spot the subtle clues she unknowingly reveals by the way she talks about Yelena. Your concern for her trumps the slight jealousy you feel knowing someone else is blatantly in love with your partner.

"Have you spoken to her?" you inquire, choosing to overlook her rants.

"Not exactly," Kate sighs. "I think she's upset with me for carelessly letting slip that we were friends with benefits."

"I'll have a word with her," you assure, offering Kate an extra sports drink you picked up from the station.

"I'd appreciate that," Kate replies, casually uncapping the drink and taking a prolonged sip. "Her career means the world to her. If she's not willing to reconsider, then I'll submit my resignation first thing tomorrow."

"No, Kate, you don't need to do that.”

Kate dismisses your worry with a nonchalant wave of her hand. "I'm wealthy," she states as if it's a mere fact. "I don't really need a job. I just need something to keep me busy."

Wanda finishes the same 6-miler event in record time. She notes that only a small number of female participants managed to run faster than her. In her mind, she's certain she could've overtaken them if she had kept up a steady training regimen. The reality is, Wanda only rekindled her interest in running when she started therapy. Calliope suggested that exercise releases natural endorphins that boost physical energy and mental focus throughout the day.

And besides, it felt oddly comforting to partake in a hobby that her ex-wife used to thoroughly enjoy, even if it's no longer an activity you both share. Running is one of those bridges to you that she wishes to maintain, an unbroken connection that she can enjoy privately, without the worry of hurting anyone in the process. A somewhat delicate balance between holding on and letting you go. Wanda used to think that her love for you had nowhere to go, but in learning to love herself, she had discovered that she can unearth traces of you–even in the tiniest moments that paint life with vibrant hues. Love doesn’t go away–it simply transforms. 

After quietly dedicating her medal to you, Wanda’s about to start her post-run stretch, when she is interrupted by a soft touch on her shoulder.

"Excuse me?"

With a quick turn, Wanda shifts her attention to the person behind her. It’s the customer from a few days ago, the one with the captivating deep brown eyes. She instantly recalls how this woman had oddly requested a 'surprise me' drink, prompting a warm smile to spread across Wanda's face.

"It's you!" Wanda exclaims, recognizing the woman as she rearranges her ponytail into a messy bun.

“Yup, it’s me,” The woman mutters with a grin, delighted to run into Wanda at this event. “I couldn’t help but notice, you're fast enough to clock a mile in under seven minutes.”

"You think so?" Wanda replies, her cheeks warming up at the unexpected compliment.

She nods at Wanda with an infectious enthusiasm. “I’m actually a co-founder of a running club. We're mostly from Queens and Brooklyn. How about joining us?”

Wanda couldn't recall the last time she had been involved in a group or community outside of work. The thought of meeting new people–individuals that share a common interest and goal–fills her with childlike excitement.

“Oh, I would love to!” Wanda exclaims. “How often do you guys meet?”

Wanda listens attentively as the woman gives her a rundown of their weekly group runs and the list of running events they had decided to join as a group.

The woman then extends her hand towards Wanda. "By the way, I'm Valkyrie, but just call me Val."

Grasping Val's hand, Wanda feels the warmth from her palm seeping into hers. “I’m–”

"Wanda. I know," Valkyrie interrupts, winking at her slyly before releasing her hand. Just as Wanda is about to respond, the sound of your voice captures her attention, taking her by surprise.

“Wanda?”

Wanda's smile trembles slightly, the vulnerability in her eyes betraying her surprise as she hears her name uttered by you. All week long, Wanda had put up walls, deciding not to contact you in an attempt to make it easier to bear the ache of missing you. But the opposite proved true. The act of holding back only amplified the very thing she’s been trying to avoid.

Taking a deep breath, she slowly turns to face you, trying her best to appear casual, “Y/N!”

Your face lights up at the confirmation that it’s indeed Wanda that you’ve spotted in the crowd. 

Leaving Kate momentarily, you dart towards Wanda.

“Hey! Did you run too?” you inquire as you reach her, slightly breathless. “I didn’t spot you on the course at all.”

Wanda feels a sudden surge of self-consciousness, awkwardly sweeping a stray lock of hair behind her ear. Her cheeks flush a deeper shade of pink, not from the exertion of the run, but from the self-awareness that she's soaked in sweat. She fights the urge to take a quick sniff of herself in front of you. “I, uh, started near the front, so you might have missed me,” she says, clasping her hands together, trying to hide the lingering dampness that clings to her skin.

"Damn, I completely forgot how insanely athletic you are," you say in genuine awe. "You must have crossed that finish line way ahead of me."

Barging in your conversation, Kate clears her throat pointedly from behind you.

"Oh, this is Kate," you quickly introduce, gesturing to your friend standing nearby.

"Kate Bishop," Kate reaches out her hand, giving a short, somewhat awkward wave.

Wanda reciprocates the gesture, mimicking Kate's awkward wave.

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Wanda," Wanda says with a friendly smile, and then remembers as well that she has company herself. "Oh, and guys, this is..."

“Valkyrie. But everyone just calls me 'Val',” Valkyrie chimes in, finishing the introduction herself. Your eyebrows raise slightly as you take in the newcomer, realizing that you don't recognize her from anywhere. Wanda's circle of friends has always been small, and your mind is quickly consumed with thoughts of how they met.

“You and Wanda…?” you find yourself asking, unable to stop the question before it tumbles out.

“We, uh–”

“We’re–”

Wanda and Valkyrie both start to speak at the same time, before sharing a laugh, while you manage to maintain a tight smile on your face.

Breaking the brief silence, Valkyrie takes charge of the conversation. "I met her at the cafe earlier this week. I didn't know she'd be here too, so I asked her to join my running club."

Kate jumps in with a teasing tone, "Meet cute," causing you to whip your head towards her, a grave expression on your face.

“Y/N, you should come along too,” Wanda suggests enthusiastically, before quickly realizing that it wasn't her place to invite. She turns apologetically towards Valkyrie, “I mean if you're looking for more people. Y/N is pretty fast–”

“Not as fast as you,” you say to Wanda.

“–and really committed to running. Her consistency and work ethic is nothing short of impressive.” Wanda finishes coyly.

Valkyrie eyes you up and down skeptically, her gaze sweeping over your toned body, particularly over your calves and thighs as she makes her assessment based solely on your physical looks.

“If Wanda’s vouching, then I trust her,” Valkyrie says, shifting closer to Wanda, her hand lightly touching Wanda's arm.

A surge of discomfort stirs within you as you witness their interaction. You decide right away that you don’t like this Valkyrie person. Something about her just rubs you the wrong way.

“Wanda, can I have a word with you?” you ask, not managing to keep the sharpness out of your voice.

At your words, Kate looks at you expectedly, but you're too preoccupied watching your former spouse to notice it.

"Sure," Wanda agrees, slightly taken aback by your sudden request. As you both excuse yourselves, the pair of you weave through the bustling crowd, Wanda falling into step beside you.

You can't help but steal glances at Wanda as you both walk side by side, her striking profile softened by the warm sunlight bathing the park. You can feel the curious eyes of both Valkyrie and Kate following you from a distance, their watchful gazes prompting you to maintain a respectable distance between you and Wanda.

Once you've found a less crowded area, you pivot to face her, trying to marshal your thoughts into coherent words. Yet before you can speak, Wanda preempts you.

“I’m sorry I never replied to your last text,” Wanda blurts out as soon as you both come to a stop. “I was on my way to the cafe when you... and then I just forgot about it, and I only realized I left you on read the next day–"

"Wanda, it's fine," you interrupt gently, smiling softly as you observe her anxious rambling. "There's no need to apologize. Life gets hectic, and we all have those moments. How is Sparky by the way?" 

“He's in better condition and has adapted to his new diet. I no longer have to force him to eat, which is definitely an improvement.” Wanda says.

“That’s a relief,” you say faintly. “I'd be more than happy to help out and take him in from time to time.”

“Yes, he'd really appreciate that,” Wanda affirms with a nod. “And I-I would, too.”

A ripple of nervous laughter passes between you before Wanda redirects the conversation back to your intended topic. "So, what was it you wanted to discuss? Is there something on your mind?" she inquires.

You swallow hard,  the growing anxiety clouding your ability to articulate your thoughts. Then, a sudden spark of inspiration kindles your mind. "T-The club," you stutter, snapping your fingers as though you've just recollected a vital detail. "What's the story there? Can anyone join?"

“Val didn’t mention anything specific. But it seems like a private group. Perhaps it's by invitation?” Wanda suggests.

“And you think it's okay for me to be part of it?" you ask, uncertain.

"Why wouldn't it be?"

You shrug, your thoughts circling back to Valkyrie's smug expression and her tendency to invade Wanda's personal space. You couldn't help but sense that Valkyrie's interest in Wanda extended beyond recruiting a fast runner to the group.

And isn't it quite the coincidence that she bumped into Wanda at this particular event?

It just…doesn’t sit well for you. 

(Or perhaps your trust issues are a lot worse than you think.)

"I don't think she's thrilled about me joining," you say. Wanda gives you a baffled look that you’ve always found so endearing.

“You can’t be serious,” Wanda dismisses. “We've just met her today, so I think it’s a little weird if she doesn’t like you.”

You consider challenging her perspective, but instead you offer a polite smile, keeping your reservations to yourself.

"I'll tell you what," Wanda proposes, "If you don’t join the club, I won’t either."

"Wanda–"

"I'm serious, I'd feel out of place if I didn't know anyone there–"

"I'm not sure," you retort, nonchalantly shrugging. "You seem to have hit it off with Valerie."

"Valkyrie," Wanda corrects softly, a suspicion in her gaze, as if she's attempting to decipher a riddle she can't quite solve. "Not really. I just met her the other day. She doesn't even frequent the cafe.”

“Not yet," you mumble quietly, your words barely audible. “Alright. Inform me about the training schedule and location and I'll make an effort to attend.”

“I'll do that,” she agrees, and the two of you lapse into comfortable silence.

“Is that all you wanted to talk about?” Wanda questions after a while.

"Sort of. I mean, it was getting crowded over there, and I wanted to say congratulations," you explain, a bashful smile gracing your face.

“Same to you, Y/N,” Wanda finds herself whispering the words–as if caught up in a romantic comedy movie scene, with a montage of breezy moments where the best parts of life simply pass by. It’s a feeling that’s becoming hard to escape whenever you’re around, even under ordinary circumstances; just you–with no makeup on, smelling of sweat and grass and soil–seems to just captivate her so.

“Come on,” she says and unwittingly takes your hand, biting her lip the second she realizes the contact she initiated. But she couldn't simply drop your hand as if she had been scorched.

As you near the spot where you'd left Kate and Valkyrie, you pull your hand free from Wanda's grip. Taking a deep breath, Wanda briefly manages to suppress the sting of rejection that grips her.

"So, sorted everything out?" Kate teases, her tone slightly acerbic as she addresses you privately. You can tell that she likely knows who Wanda is and can perceive the undercurrent of tension. Taking a casual walk with Wanda, especially with Kate around, might not have been the best decision, but you rationalize that you're not doing anything wrong.

You shoot Kate a dirty look in return, then bid goodbye to Wanda and Valkyrie.

"Catch you later, Y/N," Valkyrie throws in, her smirk conspicuous as she speaks just before you can head in the opposite direction.

***

You make it home just in time for breakfast. Yelena has ordered bagels and coffee, but her culinary abilities are also on display, illustrated by her recent success in frying bacon to the perfect crisp, steering clear of the usual outcome of a charred mess.

"Hey, baby, how was your run?" Yelena asks while setting up the breakfast spread on the dining table.

"I broke my personal best," you report to her, your face lighting up with pride. Swiftly, you begin to strip off your sweaty running clothes, heading towards the bedroom for a much-needed shower.

In just a few minutes, you step out of the bedroom with a towel slung over your neck, dressed in a threadbare shirt and nothing but your underwear. Your stomach rumbles loudly in anticipation of food. Yelena chuckles at your evident hunger and begins spreading cream cheese on your bagel while you add milk and sugar to your cup of coffee and hers.

"By the way," you begin tentatively, aware that it might be premature to broach what Kate had revealed to you. Nonetheless, you recognize the necessity of addressing the issue sooner rather than later. "Kate was there too, for the 6-miler. She... shared something with me that I think you should have discussed with me first. Something about a team transfer at work?"

Yelena's body stiffens noticeably, and she remains frozen for a brief moment. Her eyes betray a sense of uncertainty as she absorbs your words. But, after a few quick blinks, she collects herself and passes you your bagel on a plate.

“There's some truffle and honey in the fridge if you want to add them to yours,” Yelena offers.

An obvious deflection.

"Did you hear what I said? I said Kate–”

"Kate really ought to stop broadcasting every detail of my life whenever she has an opportunity,” Yelena mutters coldly.

“Don’t be mad at her. She was doing what she thought was right–”

“She had no right to meddle!” Yelena yells, her voice escalating, startling you with the sudden outburst. Her emotional fervor is more intense than you've ever seen, leaving you taken aback. 

“She’s just worried about you,” you respond, striving to keep your voice calm to temper the situation. "But why didn't you tell me? We had an understanding that you didn't need to push her out of your life for me."

“Because it's my career–my choice,” Yelena insists, her tone unyielding. She is steadfast in her independence.

But her independence isn't the issue here. You’ve always been proud of how she can handle herself.

"Telling me about it isn’t an invitation for me to control you in any way, Yelena," you assure her. "I just wish you had enough faith in me to share the things that matter deeply to you. I care about you, and it stings a bit to be left out of these aspects of your life."

Yelena grows quiet at that, her fingers closing around her mug tightly as she processes your words and what it means for your relationship.

Trust.

It’s not that she doesn’t trust you enough–

“I feel guilty,” Yelena admits in a soft murmur, so faint that you strain to catch her words. "I've been doing a lot of thinking about how I've treated Kate, starting from when she confessed her feelings to me, right up until we started dating. Despite us being together, Kate and I remained close at work. We'd take lunch and breaks together, and we'd even take turns buying each other coffee, depending on who got to the office first…”

"It's like... I've been leading her on, you know? I've never given her the chance to get over me. I've come to realize that the feelings she had for me back then... they're still there, maybe even stronger than before. I can't keep messing with her emotions like that," Yelena confesses, sipping her coffee as if seeking solace in the soothing warmth of the drink.

You nod, the pieces finally starting to fall into place. “Did you talk to Kate about this? Or did you just cut her off?”

The guilty look that flashes across Yelena's face tells you everything you need to know.

“She thinks you're angry with her because she told me about... about what happened between you two,” you say, still a little uncomfortable bringing up the past.

Yelena lets out a sigh, her shoulders sagging. “I've been handling this Kate situation all wrong, haven't I?”

“Just talk to her,” you advise gently. Getting up from your chair, you walk over to Yelena and start massaging her tense shoulders. “She said that she would rather quit her job than let you transfer to another team and mentor."

“Really?” Yelena sounds surprised. “Did she mean it?”

"I'm not sure," you reply, shrugging your shoulders. "She simply mentioned that she's rich.”

“She’s grossly rich,” Yelena confirms, letting out a content sigh as you find a particularly tight knot in her muscle. "But she loves journalism. I won’t let her quit something she's passionate about.”

You recognize the irony in Yelena's last sentence but decide to remain silent on the matter.

“By the way, Wanda was there too,” you say carefully, watching Yelena's reaction closely. “She crossed the finish line way before me, I think. She was with a friend.”

Yelena's response is evasive, offering no real insight. "That's nice for her," she remarks, keeping her emotions well in check.

You quickly change the topic, feeling somewhat foolish for bringing up something she apparently doesn't care about, even though you were simply trying to be open and honest. You decide to avoid mentioning your ex-wife for the time being.

“Anyhow,” you segue, hoping to direct the conversation in a new direction, “Would you like to join me for my next fun run?”

“Me? Up and running at four in the morning? That's about as likely as snow in the Sahara,” Yelena replies, a twinkle of amusement in her eyes. “I'll just use a line from my favorite show,” she quips, her laugh filling the room. “‘Jogging is the worst, Y/N! I mean, I know it keeps you healthy. But God, at what cost?’”

Your mouth forms a small 'o' as you consider your response, feeling slightly let down that she isn't even slightly tempted to join you. “To be fair, jogging and running are not the same thing. Running recruits a different muscle group–”

“God, you’re such a nerd,” Yelena cuts in, a mischievous glint in her eyes as her hand delicately finds the back of your neck. She draws you nearer until your lips are tantalizingly close. “Keep doing what you love, baby,” she murmurs, her breath brushing over your partially opened lips. “And I'll continue pursuing mine.” Then she claims your lips in a deep kiss.

Your body instinctively melts into her touch, your hand gently tracing the curve of Yelena's waist, sending a shiver racing down her spine.

"I've got a better idea for a workout that doesn't involve clothes but might be more fun," Yelena suggests with a breathless laugh, stepping back slightly.

A playful smirk tugs at the corner of your mouth as you pull your shirt over your head.

Taglist: @blackluthxr | @esposadejoyhuerta | @secretbackrooms | @justgotlizzied , @casquinhaa | @marvelwomen-simp | @sunsol-22 | @wandanatlov3r | @kyaraderuwez | @justyourwritter69 | @stanolsevans | @aliherreraaa | @diaryoflife | @justagurlwholikes

[dirty-bosmer]

From the edgy oc asks, for Nim <3

10. What's an AU that would be interesting to explore with your OC?

13. If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

25. What is your favorite thing about your OC?

Sneaking this one in during work hours, heeheee. Thank you for the ask <3

What's an AU that would be interesting to explore with your OC?

Oooh, I got asked this one a month ago, and I still think about those alternate endings a lot. I have two:

1) Nim joins Mathieu in destroying the Dark Brotherhood, Lucien dies at Applewatch (she joins in the effort LOL it's✨cathartic✨), kills the rest of the Black Hand, and gets her happy ending with Lorise and Raminus and a happy family :)

2) Nim decides to be Listener, moves to Bravil, has a full blown affair with Arquen. Lucien still goes crazy because the power has been completely shifted and he can no longer control her. After a year or so, she gets extremely bored tho and fucks off to the Shivering Isles with no warning, leaving everything in shambles :)

I have some really stupid modern AU texts between Lucien and Nim that I've thought about posting before. I might draw them eventually. We'll see...

If you met your OC, would the two of you get along?

Honestly, idk XD I think it depends on the context that we met in. If we were drunk in a bar bathroom or university roommates, I think we'd be really good friends. We'd go to parties together, study together, probably would have made each other's college lives feel less lonely by just... being alone together, if that makes sense. Doing our own things but knowing someone else is there when we need them, which is how the relationship with some of my closest friends are. We're all pretty introverted until we're not lol.

But if we met while she was elbow deep in her Dark Brotherhood shit, I'd be like girl you are stressing me out!! There are some rancid vibes wafting off of you and I am trying to write my thesis! I have my own neuroses and cannot handle another person's self-destruction right now!! Also I have a really hard time sitting idle and shutting my mouth if I know my friends are doing dumb shit/fucking around with trash people. I'd tell her to get her shit together and I don't think she'd like hearing it 😔

What is your favorite thing about your OC?

Probably her resilience. Despite how painful her life has been, it's never broken her spirit or stopped her from scrabbling toward happiness. She goes through a lot of traumatic stuff over the course of her life and the events of the fic, but I never wanted it to strip her of hope. In fact she's kind of delusionally optimistic that things will somehow work out in the end despite her inability to stop making terrible choices lol, and I guess I respect that even though she knows she's doing awful things, it doesn't stop her from helping out those she can.

[lemuel-apologist]

Listen. The way that universities treat ADHD is deplorable. The way that the public at large treats ADHD is just as bad, but universities in particular are fresh on my mind, given where I am in life, about a month post-graduation.

This post is a bit of a preamble. Bear with me.

I struggled through three and a half years of genuine college being the way I am with no buffer; had an unwelcome epiphany of a diagnosis at the end of my second-to-last semester; and had the best semester, confidence- and social-life-wise of my life-- which was, simultaneously, the worst semester of my life academically. I have gone on and on about organic chemistry and how it fucked with me, but I don't know that I have gone into why.

Post-diagnosis, I was presented with the opportunity to tell my ochem professor about anything that could be an issue during the semester. I debated it; I debated it very seriously; but this form was a graded assignment, and I had to either tell him or not tell him, and it was better than I tell him than not. So, I told him, in very edited-down words, that I have some issues with anxiety and I have ADHD. Both have, because of how I am as a person, meant that I have to approach labs in a certain way and I probably will freak out at some point, but I was optimistic that it wouldn't be an issue at that point, and I would recuse myself to the hall if it was. (After all, I'd been medicated for about a month and, in that time, had survived moot court, navigated a family member's arrest that I advised on forensically, and cooked for two family events. I was fine. I was only medicated for the sake of anxiety. It was working as planned.)

I have a bone to pick with that professor in particular for a lot of reasons. He had a lot of interactions with women that rubbed me the wrong way, but none of them crossed that line like they did with me. I told him the way that things were going for me, I told him what I needed (a chance to eat before class, some extensions as needed on assignments, and clarifications on what he wanted done with equipment), and he consistently held me to a higher standard to other students, stepped in to mess with my fume hood when I didn't ask him to, and, importantly, would dock anyone up to five points from their labwork for being late to class, meaning that I couldn't eat before lab, since I had to sprint uphill from my osteology class-- which he knew, because that was something I told him. I vented very briefly, in exasperation, to my Senate advisor, who was the only member of faculty anywhere near administration who knew about my ADHD; and, when she asked why I didn't see about more formal accommodations, I reminded her the state of our school's Disability Services processes, which we were in the middle of advocating for fixing, as a block (famously hard to navigate and famously impossible to get through in a timely manner, meaning I wouldn't be able to do anything about it before I graduated-- and it wouldn't guarantee nonretaliation anyway).

And you know what? I got a D+ not because of him, but in SPITE of him. I got a C total not because of him, but in SPITE of him. Eat my FUCKING ass.

[ramblingsfromthytruly]

so yesterday i went to this college workshop thingy through my school. my one friend couldn't come unfortunately. so the first half of this thing i spent awkward and alone. my workshop started at 11am. there was one other girl who was in my workshop and she said that she'll just stick with me since there's no one else from our school who's in that workshop (my friend was in it too but..). so that girl, i only knew her as my friend's friend from computer science. but after we left the workshop at around 1.30 we stuck together. she did have other people to talk to but she wasn't really close with them. we talked and talked and talked and walked around the very pretty campus of christ university and bought juice and chocolates at the canteen (didn't get lunch cuz the line was too long and we weren't willing to sweat in that heat, plus i had packed snacks). we probably walked to the auditorium block and back to the canteen repeatedly at least 4-5 times. we spent the rest of the time till 4pm sitting on the stairs on the second floor of the auditorium block. at first she spent her time texting/scrolling on her phone and i was reading my book while listening to music. then we somehow struck up conversation. you know that mood where you're somewhere out of the normal school routine and you're sort of tired after an "event" and you have really deep conversations? well that was the exact vibe. in my experience that happens during the end of the school year (like the last few months) but it happened yesterday afternoon/evening. we talked about future careers, and life, and she told me about her whole story with her boyfriend that she's been with since 9th grade (we're in 11th grade rn).

my point is, i was terrified and resigned myself to be awkward as hell the entire time because this is a new school with new classmates and i attached myself to one person who couldn't come, this unfamiliar situation resulted in albeit a bit of awkwardness at first but later a new friend.

now i'm not saying i'm glad that my friend couldn't come, she was really looking forward to this. i'm saying sometimes unfamiliar/uncomfortable situations (out of your comfort zone) can result in unexpectedly nice results.

[unlikelyarcadefire-blog]

When I was 16, I randomly watched (if I recall correctly) the 1996 version of Jane Eyre, with Charlotte Gainsbourg and William Hurt as Jane and Rochester. This is the only version I have been able to watch, as all others have off-put me in some way or another. I recommend it to anyone! It is incredibly sweet. I'll probably post more about that later.

After I watched, I was so emotionally moved, I rushed to read the book over the following four days. It was life changing! It made me think like a story never had before.

It also made me write. I began penning my own period novel, and worked at it for perhaps 3 years. I abandoned it mostly due to personal life events that made continuing it difficult and unappealing.

However, now I am 27. I decided to try NaNoWriMo after seeing John Green mention it in a video (at the tail end of November '23!) and was delighted to find... I loved it! And I wrote every day, every free moment. I stayed up late into the night. I was hooked!

I originally (11 years ago) had written my story on the notes app on my iPad -- I know, I know. I likewise kept a notebook as a hand written key for OCs backgrounds. That has been since lost -- I believe I discarded it, as I did many things in my college days. But I had emailed copies of my Notes to myself and was able to use them as a starting off point.

Let me tell you -- a lot of it was discarded, but some parts surprised me! It can be invigorating to rediscover your old art -- and be impressed or moved by it. Though, I am arguably better at writing and plot development now, with experience (English degree) and just life stuff.

Anyway, it's been like two months and I already have around 350 pages -- with lots more to write. I didn't think I'd ever actually write a book, but this is one of my biggest projects yet. And it's been a joy to create something! Since I graduated, I have slowly fallen out of my love and dedication to art -- it lingers but is overshadowed by daily life. I'm married and have a toddler now. But I believe I can have both! I am seeing inspiration and beauty everywhere -- I cannot escape it! I initially feared writers block but I have found myself to have the opposite problem. I can't turn my writers brain off. My OCs conversate in my head all day. Not being able to write down their ramblings is agony.

I'm rereading Jane Eyre, revisiting old artistic inspirations (music, period romances, books, poetry, etc.). I feel like I'm in my art-girl renaissance.

I even returned to Tumblr, if that tells you anything.

The point of this is mere unloading. To share my obsession somewhere safe. Bc I'm afraid of seeming silly or bugging anyone with my interests (introverts be like). Thank you for listening. I hope I finish my book, and make art that makes me feel something. That's it for now.

I hope you know there is a story in you.

[destiny-fics]

Mixtape #4

[Seo Changbin x Fem!Reader]

Genre: smut, fluff, angst, college!au

Pairing: Seo Changbin x Reader

Summary: After the events of the past few months, you finally pay another visit to your therapist Sana. She suggests that you listen to the mixtape’s final song, and see this journey through before you begin to patch things up with Changbin and act like the tape never existed. You take her advice and go to Chan and Jisung for help finding the last song, realisations are promptly made and the true identity of your mixtape maker is revealed.

Warnings: smut, pet names: baby, sweetheart, protected sex, oral (f receiving), fingering, making out, Changbin’s hot and y/n makes sure he knows it, swearing, Jisung is an idiot, the smut is very dream-like and super fluffy but I like it that way, dirty talk, both the reader and Changbin are described/describe themselves as desperate for the other, some crying

General Taglist:@hiseu @yeosayang @avyskai @whatudowhennooneseesyou @foxdaisy @lickslixie @maskedmochiii

Series Taglist: @anthropologymajorkpopmultistan @brit97 @bbyboychanyeol @i-say-choco-you-say-ice-cream @snapcracklen @nightmarej1n @shadycheesecaketrash

Part of the Mixtape Series

Series Masterlist

A/n: well, here we are, finally at the end of Mixtape. I genuinely can’t thank you all enough for the love and support you’ve all shown this work. It has been my brain child for quite some time and to finally have it all out in the world to share with you all is genuinely making me a little bit emotional. I hope you all enjoy this final part 💕

"It's been a while since you visited me Miss y/l/n, I was starting to think you'd forgotten where my office was."

You smiled a little bit at Sana's attempt at a joke, sitting across from her in the squishy pink armchairs she had always had in her office. Sana had been your therapist for three years, but lately, with all the mixtape and Changbin things going on, you'd been neglecting to see her.

But now, as you picked at a loose thread on Sana's couch, you realised that maybe you should have been visiting her more, especially with everything which had happened lately.

"Yeah. There's been…a lot that happened."

Sana nodded "Would you like to talk about it?"

You chewed your lip for a bit, before nodding. Yes, the reason you had come to Sana today was to talk, but she knew you and she knew that unless prompted, no matter what your intentions were for visiting, that you would beat around the bush. When Sana motioned for you to speak you sighed, launching into the entire story. You finding the mixtape in the library, it melting in Changbin’s tape player, each song you had found and how they connected to you, the letters, the fight with Changbin and Chan's involvement in your mixtape. When you had finished, Sana gave you a nod before putting her notepad down and leaning forward, chin on her hands.

"Do you want to know what I think?"

You nodded "you know I do."

"Even if what I say might upset you?"

"Sana I trust you, completely."

"Okay. You know you hurt Changbin by assuming that Chan was the tape maker right?"

"Of course I do, I just don't know why."

"Have you ever considered the possibility that perhaps Changbin shares the feelings you have for him? And that is why he got so upset."

"I don't understand though. Changbin is…the perfect guy. Why would he have feelings for me?"

"Why shouldn't he? Y/n, we've spoken about this before. You keep putting Changbin on a pedestal because you're scared of facing your feelings for him, or facing the reality that he has feelings for you too. You don't want to lose him, so you're making him unobtainable. That way, if he rejects you, which I don't think he will, you won't be surprised."

You knew she was right, Sana was always right. You nodded a little wiping some stray tears from your eyes. "Are you even allowed to say that as my therapist?"

Sana laughed softly "maybe not. But I'm not speaking as your therapist right now, I'm speaking as your friend. And as someone who can't keep watching you hurt yourself like this."

"I am hurting myself aren't I?"

Sana nodded again "you are dear. And you're hurting him."

"I don't want to hurt him. I never want to hurt him. I love him."

"I know you do. Which is why you need to talk to him. And why you need to listen to the rest of that mixtape."

"What do you mean?"

"You said you had one song left to go correct?" At your nod, Sana continued speaking. "Then I think you need to listen to it. Regardless of who made it, of what the message at the end is, I think you should hear it, see this through."

You nodded again, feeling as if you were doing an awful lot of that this session. "But I can't find the last song, anywhere."

Sana hummed softly, looking out the window of her office to where Jisung and Chan were sat outside, waiting to walk you home. "You're friends with musicians right?"

~

"So, let me get this right, Sana thinks you should listen to the last song? Even with all this Changbin stuff?" You nodded at Jisung's question, tucking your hands into the pockets of your jacket as the three of you walked towards your apartment.

"Mhm. She also thinks I need to talk to Binnie."

"Well, we could have told you that," Chan smiled, bumping your shoulder with his good-naturedly. "But we can't help with that."

"What we can help with however," Jisung grinned, handing you his phone and some headphones "is finding that last song."

"You…" you looked between Chan and Jisung, eyes wide. "You guys know the last song?"

"Well duh," Jisung grinned. "Changbinnie recorded it in our studio, how could we no-ow! Hyung!" Jisung glared at Chan, who had not so subtly elbowed him in the ribs.

"Jisung, bro! You just," Chan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "You just ruined the whole fucking thing. Changbin's going to kill you."

Jisung had the sense to look apologetic. You, however, were still wide-eyed, looking between Chan and Jisung.

"What…what do you mean?"

"Look," Jisung quickly put the headphones in your ears. "Just, just pretend I didn't say anything." He gave you an awkward smile, putting his thumbs up. Chan sighed again, face in his hands. You could feel your heartbeat in your ears and your fingers shook as you pressed play on the file on Jisung's phone.

There was silence for a little while, before Changbin's voice filled your ears.

"Um…hey y/n," Changbin sounded nervous and unsure and it made you smile, even as you felt your eyes begin to mist up again. "Fuck, I'm…I'm not good at this, and Jisung and Chan won't shut up and…" the Changbin through the phone sighed, before laughing a little. "God, I don't even know where to begin with this whole thing, I guess that's why I made the mixtape in the first place. I guess the first thing would be to say, that I love you. I've always loved you, ever since you bumped into me and sent all my music flying across the courtyard I've loved you. Is that realistic? Probably…probably not, I don't know what Sana would say to you about that," you laughed a little bit and Chan and Jisung stopped arguing over which one of them messed up the surprise to look at you, small smiles on their faces. "But the point is," Changbin's voice continued "is that I love you. And I'm going to keep loving you, forever. And that…that kind of scares the shit out of me, but it also makes me incredibly excited. Because I just can't see my life without you in it and even if you don't feel the same way, that's okay, but I really can't keep going on acting like I'm not in love with you. Like I won't always be in love with you, because I will always be in love with you."

You ripped Jisung's headphones out of your ears as the recording cut and shoved the phone back into Jisung's hands.

"Shit! I've just made a huge mistake," you grinned at Jisung and Chan before turning on your heel and taking off.

"Wait! Where are you going?"

"I've gotta go find Changbin!" You shouted at him over your shoulder. "I know who the mixtape maker is!"

~

Finding Changbin had, actually, been far easier that you had expected. Changbin's apartment building was a finite area and as he wasn't in his apartment or the gym, there was only one other place he could be. You cursed whoever designed the rooftop terrace to have no elevator up to it as you pushed through the entrance door.

"Binnie," your voice was shaky as the man's name left your mouth and he turned to face you, looking the most nervous you had ever seen him.

"Y/n…what, what are you doing here?"

"The mixtape…I know it was you."

Several emotions crossed Changbin's face once the ball dropped, ending with him looking at you like you were the most beautiful person on the planet. You were sure you didn't look like it at the moment, sweaty, red faced and still puffing a little from the stairs, but with the way Changbin was looking at you, you couldn't help but feel gorgeous.

"So what did you think?"

You laughed softly, looking up at the sky "What did I think? What did I think? I think that I'm in love with you Changbin. Scratch that, I know I'm in love with you. That night, at the 3racha show, I wanted to go home with you, but I was so scared of losing you as a friend if something went wrong between us. Not having you in my life at all was more painful than having my heart broken for a little while. But it hurt so, so much and not just for a little while, every time I saw you I was reminded of what I couldn't have."

"What do you mean you couldn't have me?" Changbin stepped forward to take your hands in his. "Y/n, you could always have me, any way you want. Every single way you want."

"Sana says I was putting you on a pedestal, making you unobtainable, because it was easier to do that then think about you rejecting me. And she was right, I was doing all of that."

Changbin nodded slowly "but you know I'm not perfect right? I'm loud and don't really know when to stop and I'm a gym bro and-" you cut Changbin off by pressing your lips to his in a soft kiss. Changbin was effectively rendered speechless and you giggled softly at him.

"I know Binnie, I know all of that. But that stuff about you has never bothered me. In fact I like that you're loud and that you joke around, because even if you go too far, you always stop abd apologise when someone says something about it and as for the gym bro thing," you slid you hand from where it was cradling Changbin's cheek to his bicep, squeezing the muscle appreciatively. "Well that is definitely not something to dislike about you."

"You really think so?" Changbin sounded unsure and you nodded.

"I've always thought so. Changbin I love you, I really mean that. I'll shout it from this roof if you need me to."

Changbin laughed softly, leaning in to kiss you once more "I don't need that, I believe you," he grinned. "Although I wouldn't mind seeing you shout how much you love me from the rooftops."

You raised an eyebrow, pulling away from Changbin before turning around and looking out over the city. Changbin looked confused "what…what are you doing?"

You grinned at him over your shoulder "oh nothing, just doing what you want me to." You blew Changbin a kiss before turning back to face the city. "I'm in love with Seo Changbin!!" You yelled, making the man in question jump in surprise and then laugh. "I love him so much!" You squealed in delight as Changbin wrapped his arms around your waist, bringing you close to his chest. You turned around in his arms, grinning at him. "I'm so, so in love with him I want to be his girlfriend and kiss him all the time and get married to him and have his babies."

"You…you really mean that?"

"All of it? Yeah."

"Even the…the marriage and kids bit?"

You smiled softly, tangling your fingers in the hair at the nape of Changbin's neck. "Maybe not right this second, but eventually, yes. I mean the marriage and kids bit too."

Changbin grinned, before leaning down to kiss you deeply, hands resting gently on your hips. "Good," he whispered against your lips. "Because I meant what I said in that recording. I can't see myself loving anyone but you."

"Well, just for the record, I can’t see myself loving anyone but you either.”

Changbin didn’t respond to that, instead choosing to lean down and kiss you again, deeper than his previous kisses. It was similar to that first kiss you’d shared all those years ago, passionate and emotional, full of everything you couldn’t say, everything you coul, and everything you didn’t know how to say. Changbin slid his hand from your hip to rest on your ass, squeezing the soft flesh there. You gasped, pulling away and looking at him with your eyes slightly dilated.

Changbin smirked, giving you a small wink “You uh…want to go back to my place?”

“I thought you’d never ask.”

~

The walk downstairs and back to Changbin’s apartment took far longer than it usually did, almost every step you both took punctuated by a giggly kiss. You had attached your lips to Changbin’s neck as he tried to open the door to his apartment, sucking pretty purple bruises into his skin. Your hands traveled over his arms and torso and Changbin gave a full body shudder as he finally managed to open the door, immediately tugging you inside and to his room. You attached your lips back to his, the two of you stumbling backwards towards Changbin’s bed. Once your knees hit the end of his bed you let yourself fall backwards, Changbin bracing his hands on either side of you so he didn’t fall completely on top of you. It didn’t seem to bother you much though, and you reattached your lips almost immediately, hands sliding down Changbin’s torso and underneath his shirt so you could feel the layers of muscle on his body. Changbin groaned into your mouth as you touched him, muscles tensing underneath your ministrations.

“Want it off?” He hummed softly, referring to his shirt and you nodded enthusiastically. Your enthusiasm made Changbin laugh softly and he sat up to rid himself of his shirt, tossing it over his shoulder. You sat up a bit to gawk at him, mouth open in complete awe. Yes, you’d always found Changbin extremely attractive, but there was something about the expanse of delicious muscle and tanned skin which had your mouth watering and your brain completely melted.

“Binnie, you…you. You’re…wow.”

Changbin laughed, unconsciously flexing a little “is that a good wow or a bad wow?”

“A good wow. Changbin,” your hand twitched as you reached out to smooth it over Changbin’s chest and down his stomach “You’re fucking gorgeous.” You glared up at him. “Why were you hiding all this from me?”

Changbin chuckled awkwardly, but not before leaning over you to press you back into his bed. “I thought you weren’t interested, remember?”

“Well, I was,” you gulped at the tone Changbin’s voice had taken, looking up at him through your eyelashes. “Very, very interested.”

“I know that now baby, and trust me, I’m going to make good use of it,” Changbin ducked down to begin pressing hot, wet kisses to your neck, gently biting and sucking at the skin to leave his mark on you, the same way you left yours on him. You gasped as he bit into the juncture between your shoulder and neck, hips bucking up into Changbin’s.

“Binnie…” your whine of his name had Changbin moving away from your neck to look at you.

“What is it sweetheart? Need more?”

Your nodded and Changbin grinned, fingers skimming your stomach where your shirt had ridden up. The action made you shiver, Changbin’s grin only widening. “Yes please.”

“So polite sweetheart. Is it alright if I undress you?” At your nod Changbin helped you sit up, ridding you of your shirt and shorts, tossing them to join his own shirt on the floor. He sat back on his heels, just admiring your body. Every dip, every curve, it all laid out for him, for just him. This was better than anything he had dreamed before, because this was you. And this was real.

“What are you looking at?” You giggled softly, head tilted.

“Nothing, just you,” Changbin laid you back down again, beginning to press kisses to the swell of your breasts and down your stomach, looking up at you through his eyelashes. “Can’t believe you’re all mine.”

“All yours,” came your breathy voice as Changbin reached the hem of your panties.

“Exactly,” he whispered, spreading your legs gently, groaning as his eyes zeroed in on the wet spot which had formed right in the centre. “Oh you are desperate for me aren’t you?”

You whined in embarrassment, even as your hips kicked up in a plea for Changbin to do something, anything, to relieve the pressure between your legs. “You know I am,” you whined again “Binnie don’t tease.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it baby,” Changbin hummed, pressing a soft kiss to your push through your panties, grinning once more at the soft gasp which escaped your lips. “I’ve been waiting for this for so long, I’m just as desperate for you as you are for me.”

Maybe even more desperate, he thought, after he’d finally gotten your panties off and had his face buried between your legs, licking and sucking at your pussy and clit, drinking up the most delicious cocktail of your juices, paired with your sweet symphony of soft moans and begging. He ate you out like you were his last meal, like he needed you to survive. And perhaps he did. Perhaps you were Changbin’s lifeline, his soft light when everything else seemed dark. You certainly looked like his light now, almost completely fucked out as he spread you open onhis fingers and tongue. He wanted to make you cum in his face like this…no, he needed you to cum in his face like this, but when you pushed his head away with a desperate plea for him to fuck you, well how could Changbin deny such a sweet request?

It felt torturous waiting for Changbin to rid himself of his sweatpants and slip a condom on over his erection, red at the tip, rock hard and leaking precum, but when he finally pushed into you the time didn’t matter anymore, because alll you were feeling was sweet, sweet relief. Changbin’s hiss tapered off into a low groan as he slowly pushed himself inside you and he buried his head into your neck once he had bottomed out in a weak attempt to calm himself down so that he didn’t instantly blow inside of you. You hummed softly, allowing yourself to get used to the stretch of having Changbin so deep inside you and you stroked his back gently. “It’s okay Binnie,” you purred to him. “You move whenever you need to, you feel so good.”

The two of you let out twin groans as Changbin began to rock his hips, pushing his cock deep inside of you and then dragging it out. The pace was almost torturous, just enough to give you pleasure, but not enough to get you anywhere. You whined again, similar to the way you had earlier, begging for Changbin to speed up.

“Fuck me hard Binnie, please. You can make love to me later just, just fuck me for now.”

“Fuck…fuck yeah of course,” Changbin groaned, beginning to fuck you just the way you wanted. You had to give it to him, when Changbin did something, he always gave it a hundred percent, and you were pleased to find out that translated from his daily life into the bedroom. His thrusts were deep and fast, punching a desperate moan out of you with each thrust inside. His face was concentrated as he flicked between watching your face and watching the place where he was connected to you, his cock sliding in and out of your soaking hole at a brutal pace.

“There we go,” he groaned out after a particularly hard thrust which had you crying out in pleasure. “That’s what you wanted right? My pretty baby wanted me to fuck her all dumb? Well don’t worry, I can do that.”

“Promise?“ you brought Changbin’s lips to your own, gasping against his mouth when his fingers began to rub tight little circles on your clit.

“I promise. Fuck I’ll do anything you ask of me. We,” he moaned, voice deep and heavy. “We have all the time in the world.”

As the words left Changbin’s mouth, you were hit with the realisation that you did have all the time in the world. You were together. This wasn’t some dream that you’d wake up from tomorrow morning and be all alone again. This was real.

You didn’t even have time to warn Changbin as your orgasm washed over you, moaning his name loudly as you came. Changbin wasn’t far behind you though, fucking you through your orgasm even as his own pulsed through him, making him spill into the condom. He stilled inside you as he rode the last few waves out, before pulling out of you and taking off the condom, depositing it in the bin beside his desk. You cuddled into his chest immediately after he laid back down next to you, tracing little nonsensical patterns into his skin.

“So…” you began softly, drawing Changbin’s attention to you. “You’re a better actor than I thought.”

Changbin laughed a little, kissing your forehead. “I’m sorry about that, I just wanted you to come to the conclusion on your own. What’s a mystery mixtape if it’s maker isn’t a mystery?”

“Did you plan the whole thing? The tape melting, the letters, Chan’s song?”

“Chan’s song being on there yes, but the other stuff, no. You don’t want to know how panicked I was when that tape started melting.” You giggled, curling further into his chest.

“I think I have a small idea," you sighed softly, pressing a kiss to his chest "I should have realised it was your handwriting in the letters.”

“Honestly I thought you would have. It was ot the most well thought out plan b. How did you realise it was me anyway?”

“Ah well, I didn’t exactly do it. Sana suggested I listen to the last song on the tape, just to see what the final message was. So I asked Jisung and Chan about it on our walk home. Jisung let slip that you recorded it in the studio.”

Changbin sat up a bit and you slid down his chest, now looking up at him “he what? Fucking Han Jisung.”

“Hey don’t get too mad at him, if he hadn’t maybe this wouldn’t have happened.”

“So I have to thank Jisung for all of this? I’m never telling him that.”

And as you and Changbin began to laugh and curse at Jisung for ruining the surprise, you realised that there had been nothing for you or Changbin to be worried about at all, everything was going to work between the two of you because it was you, and you loved each other. You had always loved each other. And you would always love each other.

With the mixtape or without it.

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[alovelettertonow]

It is 10:39 PM. It is incredibly humid outside, amplifying the smells of cow manure by 1000x. While this condition is not ideal, the vapor-saturated air also brings out the delicious smell of our local chocolate factory and the sweet aroma of the apple orchard that everyone in my small central Pennsylvania town is welcome to enjoy. It is difficult to imagine that, in just 70 days, I will be moving away from the charming town I grew up in, where cows outnumber people, and the locals indulge in ‘garage parties’- the practice of setting up lawn chairs in your garage in the late evening, when the heat has finally subsided, and inviting everyone within a 5-mile radius to stop by and have a beer. In 2 months, I will be saying ‘goodbye’ to my part-time position at the local retirement home and moving to a quaint liberal arts college in New England. At first glance, the environments of these two places that I will call ‘home’ are completely different and incompatible. My home-town- extremely conservative with wide swaths of farmland and lovingly coined the “Amish capital of the world” , versus my college town- a very, very progressive, mountainous region with many cultural events and arts performances. They epitomize the difference between a “small-town” feel and a “college-town” feel. Hopefully, after being there for a few months, I will come to realize that they are not so different. And, if they are different, maybe that’s okay. My goals as I begin this blog are varied and many. First, I want to get better at writing. I have an extremely difficult time articulating my thoughts. I figure that making a coordinated effort to write might improve my skills, so I feel on-track when I begin my first semester of college. While I attempted to write in a google doc, I found I wasn’t able to hold myself accountable, and that perhaps posting on a public forum would be helpful. Next, my difficulty with articulating my thoughts, unfortunately, lead to a certain dependence on Chat GPT, undoubtedly making my writing worse that it had been before I discovered that God-forsaken app. Reason 3- I just got a new computer for college, and the keyboard is huge. I need to practice writing on a keyboard that is 1.5x wider than what I’m used to. Finally, I wanted to blog so I could share my life, give advice, get advice, and stay in touch with those at home who are interested. I know many bloggers have a certain “genre” that they stick to- they might comment on the news, spirituality, or they may even share recipes. Maybe one day I will think of a genre, but I think for now, I’ll just share about my life. Let’s start with today.

I woke up this morning at 5:15 so I could get to my 6:15 shift. Anxiety will likely be a topic I touch on quite frequently. The thought of dishing out grapefruit and prunes in the morning nearly sent me over the edge, and I couldn’t sleep. To be fair, I am a new employee- I started about 3 weeks ago. Each “number” on the schedule has different job duties, and I had never done those duties before… how was I supposed to know how many grapefruit sections to put into a dish???? It’s three. As expected, everything was just fine, although I accidentally interrupted a table while they were in the middle of praying. Sorry! I really love my job so far, and I can only hope that I keep enjoying it. When I got home, I was determined to read a good section my book, but I ended up napping. Trying to enjoy the little things that make me human. Listening to country music on the car ride home because something about the heat makes me crave a southern twang. Rushing up to my room right as I get home so I can turn on my AC and hope it cools down my room in time for bed. Sitting on the back porch with a cozy blanket, even though it is a bit too hot for that. Seeing the firefly’s twinkle in the backyard and pretending not to notice my neighbors moving around outside. Making plans with friends now that we are finally free. I am in love with life.

Today, my best friend gifted me this plush for my dorm room. His name is Apollo. ☀️

[zenmai--jikake--no--komoriuta]

about me — people i’d like to know better.

LAST SONG. I don't remember what the last one I listened to was exactly, but while I was outside trying (unsuccessfully) to rig up a dashcam this morning, I had some music on from my iPod and this one has since lodged itself in my head:

FAVORITE COLOR. Soft peachy orange! (#FFC3A6) :D

CURRENTLY READING. I don't tend to read books too often actually! So technically nothing, but the last book I was reading was a .pdf of Gavin de Becker's The Gift of Fear on my phone as in-flight entertainment on the way to and from Perth a few months ago haha (it's one of those books you see recommended everywhere so I decided to give it a go while I had little else to do)

CURRENTLY WATCHING. At this very moment, on tv there's a medical doco called The Hospital: In The Deep End that I'm half-watching while typing this-- and back home, James and I were watching the new Spice & Wolf reboot! The series is very near and dear to his heart so it was fun hearing him explain certain bits and how they differ in the various adaptations, but we got sidetracked with work getting busy and need to get back to it sometime :')

SWEET, SAVORY, OR SPICY? Sweet!! I have a huge sweet tooth (I actually just got back from baking a mini vanilla cake to snacking on while I'm here housesitting lol, haven't baked a cake in years but "I still got it" as they say) but I also really like savoury things just as much-- but it depends what food/drink item we're talking! Like I prefer savoury veggie muffins over sweet cupcakes, but I also take my tea with 3+ spoons of sugar so it really depends from thing to thing lol and spicy is just straight-out; I have white girl spice tolerance and dislike anything that makes my mouth more than tingle haha, hate it!

RELATIONSHIP STATUS. Taken! We've been together 4 1/2 years now, he's actually my old raid leader from the Heavensward era in FFXIV! He got my sister's husband into the game while they were studying to be chefs and then they got me into it and one thing turned into another... but we only started dating in 2019 right before the pandemic after going on a group holiday to Japan with our friend Linkshell-- he was really cute in-person so I ended up crushing on him hard, and he thought I was still with my ex (also from the game, but long-distance) until I invited him out for a coffee date and he went "hm suspicious", it turned out he still liked me from back in the day so we gave it a shot and yeah! Somehow my FFXIV journey all comes back to him in the end which is always funny to me :')

LAST THING YOU GOOGLED. "cooking frozen chicken kiev in oven" = there were some kievs/kyivs in the deep freezer but no cooking instructions on them.......... put them in the oven for dinner right after getting my vanilla cake out lol (future kate: they were delicious)

CURRENT OBSESSION. I could ramble for days and days about this series but it's still My Love Story with Yamada-kun at Lv999! It's a really cute fluffy slow-burn romance between the basically canon autistic aloof pro gamer Yamada and college-student Akane who only plays games very casually-- they're part of the same MMO guild and cross paths at a RL event, and a lot of the initial plot follows how they slowly befriend eachother and confess and aughhh//////// /// It has gorgeous art, fun and likeable characters, treats its "rival" characters with grace and empathy even when they're struggling or getting rejected... there are MANY parallels I've drawn between their relationship and my own while reading so I get even more enjoyment out of it than most lol, they have such a healthy relationship and their dynamic is really sweet and I love it so much I made a whole 44-song fanmix about it haha-- but yes I highly recommend the series!! There's an anime which came out last year which is a really faithful adaptation, and the manga has recently started getting an english tankobon release too :D

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Tagged By: my sis @arty-ffxiv!

Tagging: none bc I Am Shy™, if you wanna yoink it then be my guest! also tag me bc I wanna seeeee