#listen this poll has both cats that are boys and boys that are cats

[coolandspicy]

Why vote for Kuro: okay I do not understand Servamp whatsoever but Kuro (or Sleepy Ash if you prefer) is some kind of sleepy cat boy/monster representing the sin of sloth. I think there’s no question about him qualifying as a catboy since he has cat ears and a cat form but admittedly I do find both to be somewhat stylized in such a way that makes the cat features a bit uncertain. But whatever man look at this guy. He looks anemic and he has eye bags is that not enough?

Why vote for Raymond: you shouldn’t I really don’t like this guy. But uh. He is probably one of the most popular cat boys on this list. And he has enough humanized fanart to count as an anime boy. Probably. He had that whole thing with acnh players making him wear a maid outfit? Idk. Vote business casual cat if you want to.

[paraphwrites]

@carpediemma made a poll post about which characters would be who in an alice in wonderland au and none of the one's winning are the ones i want so i will now be justifying my thesis

alice - niko. above all else, alice must be curious and kind. she is also afraid, a lot, because she's in a wild new world - very similar of how niko is scared and in a new world (both ghost/supernatural, america, and a world without her father)

white rabbit - edwin. polite yet preoccupied, punctual yet anxious, obsessive yet unpredictable, always dressed smart... the similarities go on. and while i think some of their actions might not align entirely, i think there is a case to be made for edwin shewing someone along, insisting it must be done his own way

mad hatter - charles. playful, defiant to social norms, bit of an eccentric dress style! though charles is a bit less over the top, i feel that in the right environment, he could go totally mad. hatter has a lot of fun but there is this hint of despair to him which to me, entirely emulates charles

the dormouse - jenny. tired, confused, and underpaid, next question

the march hare - maxine. unpredictable, bizarre, reckless, excitable. not a huge character so not too much to go from but i see some loose similarities in the erratic nature - it's not that they're evil, it's that they're so invested in existence that they might stab you

please do not think of the implications of shipping the dormouse and the march hair i will not be held responsible for that

tweedledee and tweedledum - litty and kingham. petty?? childish?? looks similar??? guys come ON there is no more iconic duo in dbda! they're not very kind, they're not anti violence, they love attention- am i talking about the tweedles, or litty and kingham? you literally can't tell.

the caterpillar - tragic mick. appears when alice is uncertain and needs help, prompts her to reflect on her own identity. not particularly nice but is very helpful and kind, in his own way. calm, almost cryptic, slow manner of speech.

cheshire cat - the cat king. im not gonna explain this one

ok guys bare with me for the next two. they're kinda controversial. i could see them flipped and i did flip them many times but this is what i decided on

the duchess - esther. the duchess is abusive to her child (monty), but can be overly affectionate, as well. duchess is hella comedic in a dark way, she's got a fucked up relationship with power (duchess is a slave to the Queen, esther is a slave to the Snake), she's absurdly contradictory (like esther and her contradiction of wronging girls using lilith's gift)

the queen of hearts - the night nurse. the queen cannot see a way of life other than executions. i know she SEEMS hella emotional, but legit, i think it's more this desperate desire for feelings and sensations because she is so stuck in a loop of being listened to. the night nurse is similarly stuck in this loop of bureaucracy. neither are happy and neither have any true meaning to their lives. they both also seem to lack a nuance to empathy (nurse thinking ends justify the means so no need to feel guilty about the means, almost viewing finding the boys as a game in order to feel SOMETHING). neither would not survive a day in therapy

the king of hearts - kashi. foil to the queen of hearts, very minor character. gentle, soft spoken, trying his best, exists more in his own universe than anywhere else. the key difference is if they went to therapy, kashi's therapist would end up getting therapied, and king would just break down sobbing

the knave of hearts - monty. while if esther was the queen, maybe this would be more apt, but this is my analysis so i'll do what i want. the knave is a victim of absurd injustice, is somewhat sympathetic but ultimately a perpetuater of this same system. monty does the same thing with esther & her abuse. he is also young and handsome which, we've all seen joshua colley, i don't need to explain

the talking rose - crystal (with/pre-david.) haughty, mean, cruel, flirtatious. she's not a villain but she's definitely not on your side. she's critical, both of your looks, personality, and general vibe. but she's also just one of the many flowers, kind of how crystal was just one of the rich kids, not really doing all that much

in this version, i'd have when the flower's roots are freed be the same energy as the boy's getting rid of david. moment of self-transformation, free from curse. i will probably make a follow up post on how i'd do the plot, but i wanted to throw that bit on david out there.

[twisted-confessions]

Is your OC (Bella) shipped with anyone? If so, who? What's their dynamic like?

(This took me a while to write lol, I'm SO SORRY for the late reply, this somehow slipped down in my drafts lol)

Asks from here

Yes Bella is shipped with someone! As for who, well I'm still deciding lol. The main issue is my personal biases to characters which has lead me to be stuck between three of them. Malleus, Leona and Azul. I DID do a poll and Malleus won by a LANDSLIDE (a Dragon Prince and a Dragon Girl, who woulda thunk?)

So for their dynamics, I'll go over each of what I have for them all so far in a short summary!

Malleus x Bella (Aka The Dragon ship lol): Same kinda chemistry in the main game like Malleyuu, however I'd be focusing a lot more on bringing Malleus into more scenes and having him get more involved with some of the issues (ex. Bella inviting him over the holidays in Book 4 or Malleus offering to let her stay in Diasomnia occasionally). It'd start off as Malleus growing more curious at this other "Dragon-that's-the-last-of-it's-kind" and by bonding over Toothless, as well as the feeling of being outcast for how you were born, Bella and Malleus would slowly start warming up to each other, especially when Bella realises he's a draconic fae and when Mal realises she somehow has draconic powers. Bella would also be very intrigued by his talks about Gargoyles and learning their history since it helps her learn more about Twisted Wonderland's history. He at first would call her Child of Man but once they become closer and more teasing flirty Mal might start calling her Child of Dragons or Mother of Dragons instead lol. I have a plot twist planned that reveals Bella was actually brought into the future rather that isekaied, making her older than Lilia even. I feel like after this plot reveal, Malleus would more than likely start seeing her more than a child and would help her when she struggles trying to accept that she's lost everyone she knew and loved, making Book 7 VERY interesting when she helps return the favour lol. I feel like this relationship would never actually be addressed between the two until the end of Book 7, neither of them wanting to put a label to their feelings since they know it can't last forever like they want. If Bella chose to stay in Twst, I can imagine the two of them ruling over the Briar Valley together after Mal makes her his princess 😊

Leona x Bella (Aka First Place Losers or Second Chance): Now THIS is an interesting couple! In Book 2, Bella would understand how crushing it is to never be able to step out of your older royal brother's shadow despite how much you try, which would help her try all that much more to snap Leona out of his Overblot. I can feel this being a very slowburn sort of relationship, purely because of how much Leona wouldn't want to get attached lol. But Bella is as stubborn as they come and would continuously try to talk to Leona more after his Overblot about how she truly does understand being denied every chance to lead just because you were born second. Eventually, curiousity won over the cat lol, leading to a long convo between the two where Leona would willingly listen to her "sob-story" and her advice. They would keep having these therapy talks almost every day after Bella's Dragon Tales, and slowly the two would grow more comfortable with each other, Leona even forcing her to nap with him lol. I think he would eventually tolerate Bella's boys (Toothless, Grim, Stitch) purely just so he can spend more time with Bella at Ramshackle since it's quieter there. Eventually she would show him her favourite spot to nap where NO ONE can disturb them... Under Toothless's wings lol. They would have quite an intimate relationship, I feel like they're both very touch-starved and while it would take a bit to reach that level of trust, the two are almost always napping cuddling together. Leona would bring that sense of peace or ease that Bella's been missing and help her just take a break from the stresses of NRC while Bella would be the one to inspire Leona to finally start looking for his own path away from the throne and his family's judgement, similar to what she had done when she left Berk. Once again, a couple who don't like labels however, after Book 4 Leona would finally accept that he really cares about her and would ask her to be his girlfriend after rushing with Adeuce to try and rescue her. He would continue to call her Herbivore until he hears she wants to try and bring out her "inner dragon" and encourages her to embrace her more "wild" tendencies (however, once he sees her eat a raw fish, Leona might tell her to dial it back lol.) After that'd he'd recognize her as a Carnivore like himself. I also had an idea that if Bella was given a chance to go back home to New Berk (whether modern day or past), Leona would go with her to pretty much escape and make a new name for himself, whether to rule with her as Chiefs of New Berk in modern day or to continue travelling and living amongst dragons as Kings. Hard to say but I do know that either Leona would take the chance at a new life with the Vikings or Bella would stay in Twisted Wonderland as Leona's partner to help encourage developments in the rundown parts of Sunset Savannah.

Azul x Bella (Aka From Starry Skies to Seas) I'll admit, I havent had too much thought on this one but it is kinda cute imo. It's pretty much an Enemies to Lovers trope, with Book 3 acting as the catalyst. During Book 3, Bella also offers up Toothless in the deal so that she can ask for something for herself, a new modern prosthetic leg that can handle this new world and last longer than her own one. Azul, seeing the marketability of a dragon mascot, would agree without realised he'd be the one actually looking after the night fury during those three days since dragons don't like eels lol XDD. After he realises she did that on purpose, knowing FULL well Toothless would send the Tweels flying (literally), Azul would definitely become more intrigued about the intelligent viking prefect who he before wrote off as a naïve, magicless, barbarian girl. After the overblot, he and Bella would have similar therapy talks like Leona and her, instead about being mistreated by others in their communities just for being born different and using their wits and strengths to prove themselves. Their relationship would develop a lot quicker, especially during Book 4 and the Stitch event. It'd start off as mutual contempt before turning into mutual respect of each other, eventually starting to go on "dates" set up by the tweels and the monster trio (Toothless, Stitch and Grim) lol. They're both inquisitive learners and teach each other different parts of their worlds, Bella showing Azul the wonders of the sky while he shows her beautiful places under the sea and learning more about each others homes. Just before Book 5, that's when Azul would ask Bella to be his romantic partner, which she would accept. They would have the most "normal" relationship of the three, your standard high school sweethearts. IMAGINE ALL THE BEACH DATES LIKE OMLLL-. By the end of the game, I honestly don't know what Bella would choose, whether to stay in modern Twst with Azul because she know how much he has his dreams for his businesses or if she would leave a bit heartbroken because he understands how much she loves her home and that the modern world hasn't been the kindest to her. It's a real stalemate between the two that I feel I would only figure out if I wrote the fic for them. Maybe the two would move to New Berk in modern times and Azul would start business there with the Tweels and Bella becomes a student and eventual teacher there surrounded by all the dragons and like minded vikings/people there?

[radioactivepeasant]

Fic Prompts: Free Day Friday

It's a little follow-up to Mistaken Identity au, as per the poll results!

The first week "home" had been...stifling. The man purporting to be Jak's father wouldn't leave him alone, always checking in on him, making sure he wasn't pulling at the IV, asking him questions he just didn't have the answers to. The one upside was that Damas had finally brought Daxter to see him. Of course, it had been right in the middle of Jak's fourth escape attempt, which may have been calculated. But considering Jak was pretty sure he was going to lose his mind without Daxter, he'd decided to let it go for now.

For the first hour, neither of them had even spoken. They'd just clung to each other in silence, taking solace in the knowledge that they were both alive, and here. Damas had stood to the side, watching, like he always did. He really hadn't given up on this "I think you're my kid" business. And without blurting out everything he knew about time-travel, Jak couldn't exactly prove him wrong. Frankly, even if he did tell Damas exactly why he was wrong -- namely, that Jak had technically only been born five-ish years ago -- Jak didn't think even that would convince him. He'd probably think it was some near-death hallucination Jak had in the desert.

Daxter wanted Jak to play along; let this new city think they were long lost children returning home. Anything was better than rejection and exile! But Jak just...couldn't. First of all, he was a terrible liar. Tess often told him he couldn't bluff his way out of a paper bag. But even more pressing, it just didn't feel right, repaying an act of kindness with one of deception. Besides, what would they do when they found out it was all a mistake? Better not to get comfortable at the outset.

It was, all in all, a difficult position to be in.

"So tell me why your friend there looks like a river-cat, but has human blood," Damas finally interrupted after close to two hours of watching them sign to each other.

"He has wha-"

"I HAVE WHAT?!"

Daxter bristled and leaped down onto the cot. "Whaddya mean my blood is still human?! How did you even figure that out?!"

Damas was entirely too cheerful when he answered, "Oh, nobody knew what you were when we found you, so we did a blood test. Using the wrong medicine could've killed you, after all. The vet called it a day and went home with a migraine once she figured out all your internal organs are identical to a human's. That's probably why you can talk, I suppose."

Sputtered explanations of Daxter's plight -- talking over each other and around each other, one blaming himself and the other refusing to accept it -- took up the next seven minutes while Damas just listened with a stupid grin. Maybe because it was the most Jak had willingly spoken to him since regaining consciousness.

On the bright side, after learning that Daxter was medically still human, Phobos had brought a pair of pants for him. Maybe they were an infant's button-snap trousers, but the buttons made room for his tail and both boys were grateful for it.

After four days of tortuous boredom and the hated IV, they finally let Jak out. No one had returned his clothes -- it figured, couldn't let him have gear that would help him escape -- so he'd had to shuffle out after Phobos in slightly undersized sandals that pinched his toes. Even with Daxter's enthusiastic and highly colorful commentary on the world outside the clinic, Jak hadn't been prepared for the size of the city around them.

He'd expected something like the Slums of Haven. Ramshackle buildings of sheet metal and broken roads surrounding a few locations of importance. The market district outside of the clinic alone could have fit all of Dead Town quite comfortably, and according to Daxter that was only a quarter of Spargus's true size! Asymmetrical sandstone houses and apartments lined city walls and a network of well-kept walking paths in a variety of levels, many with baskets of colorful fruits, or racks of laundry drying on landings high above the street.

Jak had immediately wandered away from Damas and Phobos, just trying to take it all in. The air was clear -- hot, but clean and free of smog -- and tasted of salt. A child collided with him, bounced off, and continued running as other children gave chase with shrieks of laughter. Jak had never seen kids playing in the street before. Where were the guards? The soldiers? Everyone outside walked with heads held high, calling out greetings, haggling over prices. The marketplace thrummed with life and color and sound, almost overwhelming in its intensity. Haven seemed like a ghost town by comparison!

Jak strayed between vendors' stalls, trailing his fingers along split-rail counters and sturdy awning poles. Daxter leaned eagerly over his shoulder, pointing out all the ammunition and daggers and armor being made. There were piles of metal gems being weighed on scales, traded back and forth, even being set into weapons! City of the hunter indeed. It looked like everyone had gems of their own to pay with. Daxter even swore up and down he'd seen an eight year old with a handful of metalbug gems buying a satchel of seeds!

"Oye! Don't wander off like that, kid!"

Phobos caught him two streets over, peering at a rack of creepy gas masks. She sounded more amused the annoyed, at least.

"See something you like?"

"This place is so crowded." Jak shaded his eyes and tried to guess how many of the people around him were warriors.

Phobos snorted and jostled his arm with a friendly elbow. "This is nothing. You should see the Arena!"

Arena? Like a stadium? The possibility of racing piqued Jak's interest, and he and Daxter exchanged eager glances.

"What's the Arena?" Daxter asked.

It was fairly hard to miss, as it turned out. Phobos pointed them towards a structure built into what looked like a caldera, just north of the market.

"There, that's the Arena: gathering place, courtroom, race track, stage and morgue, all in one!"

Daxter blanched. "What was that about a morgue?!"

Phobos shrugged. "It's built over lava, kid. Citizen candidates have to prove they can survive volcanic activity -- and Marauders, and- well, most desert life, really -- before we let them leave the city. If they don't take it seriously enough: whoosh! Crematorium."

"....ah." Daxter cringed and slid down Jak's back until only his ears were visible over Jak's shoulder. "Hence the age restrictions."

"Hence the age restrictions," Phobos agreed. She gave Jak a little shove. "Hey, if you want to get a look at it, one of our veteran hunters managed to trap a couple metaljackets recently. The Warriors' Guild is giving a demonstration for civ candidates and younger rookies this afternoon. Kind of a "here's what you can be if you don't slack off" thing."

"Ugh. Metaljackets." Jak rolled his eyes. "Not as annoying as Stingerheads, but they're up there."

He paused.

"Do you even have Stingerheads out here? Those stupid things drive me crazy."

"Well..." with a slightly chagrined look, Phobos tiptoed to wave down a slightly dismayed looking Damas, who was apparently questioning some baffled shopkeepers as to their whereabouts.

"I mean. We used to. But then we found out that Leapers really will eat anything they can fit in their mouth. We don't have a Stingerhead problem anymore."

Phobos shooed Jak over to the now relieved Damas. "Go on, I've got work to do. You guys, I dunno, bond or something. Take Jak to see the metaljacket exhibition."

Of course, in the clarity of hindsight, she would regret the suggestion.

There were still a few hours before the event was scheduled to take place, but there were already some people camped out to get front row seats. Damas didn't seem to think that this was a particularly wise strategy, commenting as he led the boys past the stands that the campers would likely run through most of the water they had on-hand while waiting. He paused when he noticed that one of the "campers" was an old man, stretched out on the benches and snoring softly.

"Well. Peat excluded. That guy just kind of does what he wants and manages to survive anyway." Damas tugged at his lip. "Honestly, nobody's really sure how. I mean, the man ate a cobra once because he said if it bites you, biting it back cancels out the venom."

"Does it?" asked Jak.

Damas’s head whipped around to fix wide eyes on Jak. "No! No, absolutely not! He was in the healing ward for days! But he managed not to need the foot amputated and ate the rest of the snake anyway."

Daxter gagged and Jak laughed. "I wanna meet that guy."

Rightly, Damas had a bad feeling about that.

When the exhibition did begin, Jak was a little disappointed. Sure, the long gunstaffs used to keep the metalheads back were cool, but he couldn't see the weapons' details well from the box where Damas usually sat. He leaned over the rail, squinting as one woman used her staff to vault into the air and slash a metaljacket back down to the ground. Daxter, long since grown bored, was scanning the rest of the stadium. Abruptly, he sat up and smacked Jak's arm.

"Hey lookit! It's a Precursor orb!" He pointed to a familiar shape lying on an awning halfway down the Arena walls. "Somebody must've dropped it! I bet we could get that later, huh Jak?"

Daxter looked around.

"...Jak?"

All Jak had heard was "Precursor orb" and the old childhood habits came flooding back. Without a second thought, he slipped over the railing the moment Damas’s back was turned. The metal was almost blisteringly hot, but he ignored it as he climbed down footholds that should have been too small for a human. Getting the orb without falling into the Arena would be tricky, but not impossible. He just had to watch his balance.

Up in the observation balcony, Damas was a little more focused on catching up on some paperwork than on the exhibition below. He tuned out the ottsel-boy muttering in alarm about...something...in order to review a new infrastructure proposal. The faster he got this done, the more time he would have to get to know Jak.

He heard some cries of alarm down below, but ignored them. The rookies would realize soon enough that the Guild had everything under control.

"Hey boss?"

"What, Kleiver?" Damas didn't even spare a glance at his talk-box.

"Er...ain't that your brat, climbing into the Arena?"

"What are you talking about? Jak's right-"

Damas finally looked up.

"...here?"

He dropped the datapad and leapt to his feet. "Oh don't tell me-"

A quick scan of the ring confirmed his suspicions and before he could stop himself he burst out, "JAK! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"

Jak paused and looked up at him from where he was leaning over the awning, orb in hand. He looked down at the orb, frowned, and looked back up at Damas.

"Is...that a trick question?"

"Get back up here before you fall and break your neck!" Damas yelled, gripping the balcony edge with white knuckles.

Behind him, Daxter sighed and shook his head. "Welcome to my world, Spikes," he said sympathetically, "welcome to my world."

[irlcats-bracket]

Bracket 5 Round 2 Poll 2

Handsome Stinkerbutt-Jones Boy vs Artemmis

descriptions and catpaganda for both of them (new for artemis!!) below

HANDSOME STINKERBUTT-JONES BOY

He's dumb as rocks and loves cheese and eggs. He will army crawl under the couch and scamper fast as lightning up the cat tree. He is the very best bastard boy and submitter loves him so much.

ARTEMIS

This is one of submitter's cats, Artemis. As you can see, she has very long fur and when you touch it it's so soft that it doesn't feel like you're touching anything. She also doesn't really meow, she trills. And when she loves someone very much, she kinda makes a little clicky noise at them? It's tough to explain. She is kind of mean but that's okay. She's also very loving and will bump her head against your arm for pets and allow you to hold her and hug her. However she is also a glutton and will eat almost any human food. Her favorite is sugar and she has been known to steal cotton candy and sugar cookies out of people's hands.

Pictured her sleeping in her signature 'holding my back paws' pose

CATPAGANDA (both)

ARTEMIS

Assorted Artemis facts:

She loves water. She loves getting gently sprayed with water, loves getting in the shower after we're done to play in puddles, and loves getting sprayed with a spray bottle.

On the same note, pipes intrigue her. When we first met her at the humane society, she was listening to the water running through the pipes in the walls. She's always stopped whatever she's doing to listen to any running pipes.

However, she is terrified of thunderstorms and will hide in the basement whenever it's raining too hard.

She loves going outside on her leash! But she has a tendency to lead me through brambles.

She'll have full conversations with you for minutes on end. She knows if she's being asked a question and will trill in response.

These are old photos from when I used to hold a camera down and snap a photo when they leaned in to sniff the lens.

Artemis is our younger cat and true to my prev description of her can be kind of a diva. But sometimes when you come into a room she will do her little chirp-meow and stretch and look up at you with such interest and light in her eyes you can't deny she really loves you. Even if she steals sugar cookies and cotton candy out of people's hands, mews pitifully whenever someone gets butter out, and sometimes knocks cups of pills on the floor to sift through them and see if any are edible. This cat has fur so soft you can barely feel it and spends and extraordinary amount of time keeping it neat and clean. Also, sometimes you can see her pulse through her fur. She prowls around the house like a big cat and loves to nap in sunny spots on the carpet and in the warm spot on the TV box. She doesn't mind being picked up and sometimes she'll even do a little trill as you do.

she is being nervous and getting pets at the wet

HANDSOME

HE WAS AN OUTSIDE TRASH CAT AND NOW HES AN INDOOR TRASH CAT THAT LOVES HIS PARENTS SO MUCH!!! Hes so sweet and lovey but a bastard. he also likes to bite lick toes.

[cerinelle-stellarium]

Seinen Stories to Start With

You would not believe the insane amount of effort I went through to do this thing. Made from the results of this poll. All series here 100% guaranteed to stay wholesome/consistent through their runs. If you're looking for something sweet, a good story or a combo of both, you will find it here!

All series listed here are from the 2000s-2020s.

ACCA: 13 Territory Inspection Dept.

Accomplishments of the Duke's Daughter

Airmaster

Alice and Zoroku

The Apothecary Diaries

Arte

Barakamon

Binbou Shimai Monogatari

Blue Period

Bocchi the Rock!

Bokura wa Mahou Shounen

A Bouquet For An Ugly Girl

Boys Run The Riot

Chibisan Date

Chio's School Road

Chi's Sweet Home

Children of the Sea

Coffee and Cat

Dad, tthe Beard Gorilla and Me

Dance Dance Danseur

Delicious in Dungeon

The Demon Girl Next Door

Dinosaur Santuary

Don't Hurt Me, My Healer!

Dungeon no Osana najimi

Emma: A Victorian Romance

Engaged to the Unidentified

Fastest Finger First

Forest of Piano

A Galaxy Next Door

Gekikou Kamen

Genshiken

Getsuyoubi no Tawawa

Gingitsune

Girlish Number

Girls Und Panzer

Gohan no Otomo

Gochika

Go With The Wind, North-By-Northwest

Granny Girl Hinako-chan

Heaven's Design Team

Heterogenia Linguistics

High Score Girl

Himouto! Umaru-chan

Hinamatsuri

Hito Hitori Futari

Hoshikuzu Telepath

Hozuki's Coolheadedness

Hyakunichikan!!

Hyouga Mono

Ichigeki Sacchu!! Hoihoi-san

If My Favorite Idol Made It tto the Budokan, I Would Die

Insomniacs After School

Interviews With Monster Girls

In This Coner of the World

Is Kichijou the Only Place to Live?

I Want Your Mother to Be With Me!

The Kawai Complex to Manor and Hostel Behavior

Keep Your Hands of Eizouken!!

Kokou no Hito

Kotaro Lives Alone

Kowloon Generic Romancey

Kuro (Somato)

Kutsuzure Sensen

The Last Uniform

Love Me For Who I Am

Love Roma

Magical Meow Meow Taruto

The Magical Revolution of the RReincarnated Princess

Manga ni Tsukurikata

Maomarimo

March Comes In Like A Lion

March Story

Memories of Emanon

Mimia Hime

Minami-ke

Miss Koizumi Loves Ramen Noodles

Mokke

Momokuri

Mushishi

My Brother's Husband

My Girl (Sumomo Yumeka)

My Neighbor Seki

Natsuiro Kiseki

Nicoichi

Nobunage no Chef

Noramimi

O/A

Odd Taci

Oh, My Sweet Alien

One Punch Man

Otome Youkai Zakuro

Our Dreams at Dusk

Pan de Peace!

Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt (Literally the only ecchi magical girl parody I'll allow on the list)

Penguindrum

Please Tell Me! Galko-chan

Pluto

Police In A Pod

Pop Team Epic

Psycho Staff

Read or Die

Re-Kan!

A Room For Two

Run with the Wind

Saint Young Men

Saturn Apartments

Sekai Maou

Shadows' House

Shiharu Genesis

Shiori Experience

Shounen Note: Boy Soprano

Shrine of the Morning Mist

Silver Nina

Sing "Yesterday for Me"

Sketchbook

Skip and Loafer

soianin

Sora no Manimani

Space Brothers

Space Patrol Luluco

Steins' Gate

Sugar Apple Fairy Tale

Suicide Girl

Sweetness and Lighting

Tadakoro-san

Tekkonkinkreet

Thermae Romae

This Art Club Has a Problem!

Tiger & Bunny

Tonari no Kashiwagi-san

Translucent

Twin Spica

Udon no Kuni no Kiniro Kemari

UdUmi Monogatari

Uncle from Another World

Under Ninja

The Unpopular Mangaka and the Helpful Onryo-san

Velvet Kiss

Wa ga Na wa Umishi

Wakako Zake

Wandering Son

Wave, Listen to Me!

The Way of the House Husband

What Did You Eat Yesterday?

Whispered Words

Wife and Wife

Witch Hat Atelier

Ya Boy Kongming

The Yakuza's Guide to Babysitting

Yasashii Sekai no Tsukurikatta

Yomigaeru Sora - Rescue WingsY

You Are Being Summoned, Azazel-san

Young Ladies Don't Play Fighting Games

Youth Forger!

[saturdaynightlivedork]

In tribute to the CBS Sunday Morning host Charles Osgood, I’m sharing this story I wrote in the fall of 2018, asking where an elephant got his name.

The Emma with the Dilemma

Hello, and how are you? How are you today?

I send you this letter, for I have to say,

That I send you this letter to ask something great

I'm on pins and needles; oh, I cannot wait.

Marvin K. Mooney and Gertrude McFuzz,

They’d both be surprised at how happy I was.

I feel as glad as the Cat in the Hat,

I must ask you a question, a good one at that.

Now I know you will mark this letter as spam

Quicker than one can say “Green Eggs and Ham”—

But hear me out on this, oh, please do not fail

To listen to all of this mystical tale.

Not much long ago, in the Land of the Prowds,

There was a young maiden, her head in the clouds.

This young maiden (named Emma McRosebud McGlews)

Had her heart wholly taken by men of the news.

Walter Cronkite made her heart go quite crazy!

She’d swoon and she’d sigh at John Cameron Swayze!

She hopped up and down just as if there were bees in her

When she laid her eyes on the late Harry Reasoner.

And last, but not least, there was one more to mention.

A man who had captured her beyond comprehension.

Born on January eighth, nineteen thirty-three,

He was as wondrous as wondrous could be.

Well, he still is wondrous, since he’s still alive.

(Last January, he happened to turn eighty-five.)

He made it a great day, he made it a fun day,

When he’d saunter by every morning of Sunday.

The sun would be shining, a smile on its face,

And all would be right with the world, everyplace.

He had a sweet smile, and also brown eyes,

And, also, of course, quite a thing for bow ties.

But something else also chased off the blues,

From the mind of our Emma McRosebud McGlews,

You see, she loved beasts: beasts big and beasts small,

Beasts fat and beasts thin, beasts short and beasts tall.

She especially had a soft spot in her heart

For the great elephant, and it's not a small part.

She knew of one elephant who babysat

For a little bird egg, and not only that;

This elephant also saved all the Whos,

Which has earned him respect from our dear Miss McGlews.

But he’s not her most favorite elephant ever;

Not the reason for Emma's question most clever;

No, here is the reason I tell you this story:

She wants to ask you folks a question of glory:

On the sixteenth of August, nineteen ninety-nine,

There was born a great big baby boy, oh so fine,

Thirty-nine inches tall, forty-three long,

And two-hundred-fifty pounds, healthy and strong.

His father was Charlie—now this is a dilemma—

You see, this baby boy’s mom’s name was, too, Emma.

But that’s not the wonderful, magical part

(Though it's an amusing and cute little start);

'Tis the tip of the iceberg, yes, it is a joy;

But it's not the best thing about this baby boy.

This baby boy, he had nothing to lose,

At least not to Emma McRosebud McGlews...

He did not get his name immediately;

For there was a poll ‘twas conducted, you see.

Five names in the running, five names did begin;

But obviously, only one name could win.

“Barnum” and “Boomer” and “Webster” and “Petey” –

All were considered for this little sweetie.

But none of these four came out victorious.

No, he got the other name, which was much more glorious.

It brought to mind Sunday morn on CBS,

His name was "Osgood"—she has to confess.

Now, he might have been named for a clown known as Scott,

Who flew in the air in a sinister plot.

Scott Osgood toured with them two decades ago,

But he might be the reason, this Emma does know.

But a small part of Emma still has happy hope,

Gladder than soap back again with its rope,

That this handsome prince of great wisdom and size

Got his name from the man with the lovely bow ties,

Born on January eighth, nineteen thirty-three,

In the bitter, cold Bronx borough of NYC,

The bringer of joy and the fighter for good,

The wonderful man they call Charles Osgood Wood.

Now you know what has enchanted her so;

Now Emma must ask you, oh, Emma must know.

Did Osgood the elephant, of wisdom and size,

Get his name from the man with the lovely bow ties?

If he did, that’s so lovely; if not, that’s OK.

If you tell her, we know you will make Emma’s day.

[gracefulsunflower]

CONTRARY - FINN SHELBY X READER; PART 47

PUBLISHED: 26/07/2022

(I forgot to copy some chapters onto here shhh)

THIRD PERSON'S POV

You woke up to an urgent pulling of your hair, and sat up. One of the twins. Isaac. He gave you a cuddle, and you held him a bit tighter than necessary, then got out of bed, balancing him on your hip. You headed into the bathroom, washing your face, and wiping Isaac's with a baby wipe. The house was painfully quiet.

You poked your head into the nursery as you passed it. Rosalie was gone. Finn probably had her. Or Isiah. He had come to stay at yours for a bit. It was too painful for him to stay there, at the house that he and Ezzie had made their own. You didn't blame him. You hadn't been in Bonnie's apartment or vardo yet. You didn't want to.

You headed downstairs, sighing at the fact that there was no noise. Saoirse would usually be humming, or giggling, or reading a story to the babies and animals, or playing an instrument, or singing, or talking. Just making noise. But the only noise was the cat meowing. You shook your head to rid yourself of the sad thoughts, not wanting to ruin your day before it started.

You hummed, although it wasn't nearly as nice as Saoirse used to, and entered the kitchen, where your daughter was up in her high chair, and your other son was sat at the table, both of them eating toast. Your husband was sat with a vacant look on his face. He looked more than tired. He looked exhausted, and you knew it wasn't just a physical one. Finn had lost two of his best mates in the one go.

"Finn?" You said softly, putting Isaac next to Finley, who gladly grabbed some of his brother's honey covered toast, even after Finley tried to swat his hands away.

"Just — tired," Finn explained hoarsely, and you pursed your lips and nodded.

You made your way around the table to your husband, and leaned down, giving him a quick kiss, then pulled him into a tight hug.

Finn placed a hand on your knee, and squeezed it thrice, grabbing his coffee with his other hand.

"I love you too," You replied, grabbing the mug next to his own and sipping it, knowing it was meant for you.

"You staying home again?" Finn asked, feeling a bit more normal after his cry.

"Yeah, I think Jeremiah has things to do so one of the girls and I will be watching Jeremy and Bon-Bon." You explained, and your husband nodded.

Isiah needed a bit more help with the babies now that Ezzie was gone, and you were all too willing to help out with your niece and nephew, and so was the girls from your netball team. They were all absolute godsends, always bringing around food and offering to watch the babies and taking Saoirse to and from school, even though it was all out of their way.

"It's Poll's birthday today," Finn informed you, and you swore, then walked over to the fridge, grabbing a small box off of the top of it.

"Can you give her this just in case I don't see her?" You asked, and Finn nodded.

Rosalie, now done with her toast, squealed, wanting to get down.

"No, you're in baby jail because you keep on opening the baby gates!" Finn chastised his daughter, wagging a finger in her direction, and Rosalie giggled.

"Oh, Finn, don't put her in baby jail! She's just exploring, right ring-a-round the Rosie?" You defended jokingly, going and getting your daughter out of your chair, bringing her over to sit on your lap.

Finn reached over and grabbed the boys' toast, and told them to come around the table to the three of you. They did so. Finn balanced the pair of them on his legs, and listened as Rosalie babbled to the twins, and Finley babbled back to her, throwing in some of his big boy vocabulary in there, telling her about his adventures with 'Untle Tarl' in the 'orch' (they picked 'appas' together, according to Finley).

You scolded Finley when he said a certain four letter word starting with 'f', Finn just laughing, knowing that his uncle Arthur most likely taught him it (you had walked into Linda and Arthur's once and caught Arthur encouraging Finley to swear — "Come on, Finley, say 'fuck' and I'll give you a chocolate!" "...Buck." "Close enough, mate.")

"We'll get through this," You told your husband, who nodded, but you weren't sure how you would or how long it was going to take.

You just knew that you'd get through it somehow.

•••

Thomas and Polly approached the group gathered in Charlie's yard.

"Happy birthday, Poll," Finn greeted, giving his aunt roses and a kiss on the cheek.

He then fished around in his pockets and gave her the box.

"From (Y/N) and the rest," He said, then stepped away from Polly, and Curly approached her.

"You grow grand in the horse shit, Poll," He congratulated in his own little way.

"Curly, pour some beer, aye?" Tommy asked, and Curly scuttled off to do it.

"The train to London leaves in an hour. Arthur, Michael, you're coming with me," Tommy said, trying to light his smoke.

"Tommy, I have to take Gina to the hospital today." Michael interjected, and Finn tried not to roll his eyes.

"A week ago, three members of our family were killed by Jimmy McCavern. The man we're going to speak to in London is establishing a relationship with Jimmy McCavern," Tommy took the beer that Curly offered, "So, cancel your appointments, and Ada can take Gina to the hospital."

Isiah bristled at this information, and Finn put a hand on his shoulder. He wanted to go with them too, but he knew that it wasn't the right time, or that he wasn't the best man for it.

"'Cause that's what women do," Arthur added, making Isiah scoff as he took a draw from his cigarette.

"Clean that shit off your shoes before you get in me car, aye?" Tommy told his cousin, taking a puff of his own cigarette.

Michael looked at him in a way that said that he wasn't impressed with his older cousin.

"Michael, they will give it and give it until your case is proven, and then they'll take it. From you, but mainly from me." Polly said, looking at her son, then at her nephew.

"Polly, you go to the hospital and speak to Aberama Gold. You tell him there is a strategy in place to avenge the death of his son and daughter, so not to do anything rash. And take with you the heartfelt condolences of the whole family," Tommy instructed his aunt, making Isiah frown.

Isiah knew Tommy meant his words, that he was truly sorry that Esmeralda and Bonnie had died, but couldn't the man say it with a bit more emotion?

"Why me?" Polly questioned as Tommy took a sip of his beer.

"Because Aberama Gold is in love with you. He even got an haircut," Tommy replied, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world, "And the smell of your perfume might help ease his pain."

Finn's mind drifted to you teasing him about Aberama being his 'favourite uncle', and he fought the urge to snicker.

"Tommy, I'm forty-five years old today." Polly informed her nephew, clearly not having it.

"Forty-five years old and still breaking hearts, eh?" Tommy said, and Arthur said a 'yeah' in agreement.

"To Polly," Tommy announced, raising his glass.

Everyone else followed suit, raising a toast for the matriarch of the family.

"Curly, organise two wagons to take the souls of Esmeralda and Bonnie Gold's souls to heaven," Tommy commanded, and Curly nodded, "Isiah, fetch his boxing gloves from the gym to burn with his body. Grab anything from your house that Esmeralda would want gone up in the smoke with her."

"Ezzie," Isiah muttered softly, knowing how much his wife hated being called by her full name.

Finn clapped Isiah on the shoulder, and led his best mate to his car, not wanting to leave him alone.

•••

You bounced Rosalie and Bonnibel on your knees as you read them a story, the boys drawing on a piece of paper with Dorothy. A car pulled up outside, and the dogs started barking. Finn Junior hopped up onto the bay window seat to see who it was.

Dottie walked over to the window to see who it was.

"Mary Bone and her baby," She announced, and grabbed the girls off of you, allowing to go and answer the door and tell the dogs to stop barking.

Mary came up the walk, the setting sun making her look all the more gorgeous, cradling a baby wrapped in a purple blanket. You welcomed her in, and ushered her to the kitchen, putting on the kettle for the pair of you.

"Is this bubby then? Oh, gorgeous!" You cooed, and she chuckled, turning the baby in her arms so you could see them better.

"Her name is Cara," Mary stated, and you cooed even more, telling her how pretty and romantic her name sounded.

"She's going to be a heartbreaker when she gets older," You said jokingly, going and grabbing two teacups and putting sugar and teabags in them.

"Hope not — I hope she'll be like her father, falling in love with the one woman and staying with her," Mary replied, and you grinned at her.

"Who's the father? You didn't tell me you were in love!" You complained, going and grabbing the biscuits from the pantry.

"I'm not the one he's in love with," Mary admitted, and you clucked your tongue sympathetically.

"Oh, Mary. Any man would be lucky to have you," You consoled, and grabbed the chocolate you stashed earlier, then going and sitting back across from her, snapping it in half and giving her the big piece.

She took it gratefully, and you pulled over Jeremy and Bon-Bon's stroller, Mary setting Cara down in it after you reclined the back of it. You got up and poured the now boiled water into the teacups, and milk, then carried them back over to the table, setting Mary's down in front of her.

"I didn't just pop around for a visit," Mary said as you settled back into your own chair.

"Oh?" You asked, confused, looking over at the woman as she rocked her child back and forth in the pram.

You picked up your teacup and took a sip.

"Cara; she's," Mary began, but paused, then sighed, looking away from you, "She's Finn's."

You gasped, and your grip on your teacup loosened, sending it clattering onto the table, sending lukewarm liquid pouring across the table and into your lap.

"What?" You questioned, your voice quiet, eyes narrowed at the woman across from you.

"She's Finn's," Mary repeated, still not looking at you.

"How dare you," You said through gritted teeth, standing up and making you way around the table to her, stopping in front of her.

She still didn't look at you.

"As if Finn would touch the likes of you — He has a wife. My husband would never," You spat, "And the next time you accuse my husband of that shit, you look me square in the eye."

Mary looked at you, and smirked, "Well then maybe you don't really know your husband, because on those nights you'd stay home while he and Isiah were out drinkin', he'd come and seek me out, and we'd head to darkest corners of the bar."

You scoffed, rolling your eyes as you picked up the teacup in front of Mary.

"I'm serious, (Y/N)." Mary continued, standing up, following you across the room to the sink, "He wanted to feel the touch of a real woman. One he wasn't forced to marry."

"Well, he seems to enjoy my touch, we've got three kids to show for it," You snarked, not missing a beat, turning to face Mary, "And you'd hardly be able to call yourself a real woman after saying you slept with my husband."

"Oh, but I am," She replied, feeling terribly bold, "See, the difference between me and you, (Y/N), is that you're a girl, and I'm a woman. You dress yourself in whatever's fashionable, change with the trends you know, you paint your nails silly colours-"

"Yellow's my favourite colour," You interjected quietly, looking down at your now cracked nail polish.

"-And you're still graceless. Awkward. However, I, the proper woman I am, I don't keep up with the styles. I dress in clothes that suit me and my body, I don't change just because something new is in style it all cycles back anyway, I paint my nails sensible colours, not childish yellow, of all things, and I have grace only you — and other little girls — could dream of," Mary finished, and you looked down at the ground.

What she said was true. She was five years your senior, three years Finn's senior. She was Ezzie's friend first, but got roped into your friend group easily. You never got on with her as well as the others, just because of your age difference, and partly because you were jealous of her.

She never walked into a room, she floated, her dress billowing around her, she never talked, she chimed, her voice sounds so angelic that it would be a crime to say she just talked, and every move she made was so precise, so calculated, that you'd think she was dancing. She never missed a beat, stepped out of formation. She was perfect, in every sense of the word.

Now that you were thinking about it, Finn could've slept with her. You wouldn't blame your husband, either, if you were single and she swung your way you'd try to bed her without hesitation.

She was gorgeous. You doubted her story of her sleeping with Finn a little less now.

"Here's what we're going to do," You said abruptly, wanting to stop your train of thought before it got worse, "We're going to get a blood test, to see if the baby has a blood type that could make her Finn's daughter. If she does happen to have a blood type that could make her my husband's daughter, then we're going to get Polly Gray to do paternity test. Our way. The gypsy way."

Mary nodded.

"If, and that's a big if, Cara is Finn's daughter, then I'll make sure you get money. I'm bad but I'm not fucking cruel," You reassured her, then dipped your finger in her tea.

After finding that it was lukewarm, no longer boiling hot, you threw it on her, the soggy teabag hitting her square in the face.

"Now, you absolute harlot, get the fuck out of my house before I grab a knife from the drawer and stab you with it," You threatened, placing the teacup into the sink, and she nodded, scurrying across the room and picking up her daughter, then hurrying out of your house.

You watched her leave out the window, and sighed, going over to the table and packing everything up, washing up the teacups and wiping up the spilt tea with a wet rag. You sniffled as you did so.

"Fuck Mary Bone, fuck her and her being so fuckable — and fuck anyone else who looked at my husband!" You ranted to the four walls as you scrubbed at the floor violently, then threw the rag up into the sink.

You were too mad to cheer when it made it in.

"Dot, you alright in there? I just need a minute!" You called out, your voice cracking as you did so.

"Yeah, they're all getting tired now, you're right!" Dorothy hollered back, packing up some of the toys the kids were using.

You thanked God that you had a friend like Dot, then the phone rang. You sprung up to answer it.

"Hello?" You croaked, and winced at how bad you sounded.

"(Y/N)! Baby!" Finn shouted, and you sighed, knowing your husband was probably off his face on booze and snow, "Solve an argument between me and Billy here, yeah? Now, when you mop, you - you vacuum the floors first, right?"

"Yes, Finn, you vacuum the floors first," You huffed, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand.

Finn whooped over the other side of the phone, "I told him that! Hey — you don't sound too good. D'ya need me home?"

"I'm fine, you stay out," You reassured your husband, not wanting him to come home yet.

"Okay. Love you, see ya when I lay eyes on ya next," Finn said, then hung up the phone before you could even reply.

You tsked, and sighed, heading out of the kitchen and up to your room to change clothes.

•••

Finn stumbled into the stables, to the cot you always had set up for him when he came home shitfaced. He woke up still drunk this morning, so he decided that it was best to sleep it off  before going to you and the kids. He had to tell you that Tommy wanted Billy to stay with you and him, so he could keep an eye on the man.

Finn heard someone clear their throat, and he looked up. You were sat on the cot, an unimpressed look on your face.

"Hi," Finn greeted quietly, and you gestured to the bale of hay next to you.

He went and sat there, confused. Usually you'd just leave him be.

"Finn, in ten days' time, you're getting a blood test because Mary Bone came here yesterday and said that her new baby was yours," You told your husband, not wanting to beat around the bush.

"What?" Finn asked, feeling dread creep up inside of him.

"She said you slept with her, and that her child is yours," You repeated, looking at your husband, "She's wrong though, isn't she?"

Finn studied your poker face, and shrugged, making your jaw drop.

"I'm fairly sure she's not," He said hurriedly, "But I'm usually too shitfaced to remember anything."

"Finn Theo Shelby!" You thundered, "If you got her up the duff I'm taking the kids on the road!"

Finn stood up, albeit with a struggle.

"You can't do that to my kids!" He protested, and you scoffed.

"I can and I will," You challenged, "I've got more right over them than you do, and you know it."

Finn stayed silent, mulling over your words.

"And if you have a problem with it, then you should go to Tommy, although I don't think Tommy would care about it," You snapped, and Finn looked utterly wounded.

You touched a nerve. You knew it.

"Get out," Finn hissed, and, instead of apologising, you plumped Finn's pillow and walked out of the barn, leaving your husband there in his misery.

§§§

Hi guys, please please PLEASE go share my pinned post, it’s a GoFundMe to help me escape homelessness & DV 🫶🏽

Love y'all ❤️

- Sunflower x

TAGLIST

@meadownicolee

@toothlessmcleod

@im-your-possession

@bethabear

@paisley-37

@shelundeadxxxx

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@cucumberfingersandwiches

@jamieolivia27

@hughesstars

[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

please please a part 2 of that gamer!geralt au, them doing something like Q&A

Nonie, I hope you know what you signed up for. This got out of hand lmao. like 2.4k of Q&A kind of out of hand. 

Warnings: swearing, talk of drinking to excess, kinda spicy questions, lil kisses, idk how but I meant for this to be goofy and horny and it got kinda soft? what’s new?

____________

“Holy shit,” Geralt sat staring at his phone as he mindlessly stirred pasta.

“I swear to god, if you found a way to burn noodles-” Jaskier turned away from the blender to wave a wooden spoon covered in pesto puree.

Geralt shook his head and held his phone up to him, scrolling through the replies to a tweet as he did, going on for ages as Jaskier’s jaw slowly got closer to the floor.

“What are those for?!”

“I put up a poll for a boyfriend Q&A or a game review and not a single person has voted for the game review.” Geralt was still scrolling through questions people wanted answered as he watched Jaskier’s face go from shock to confusion to a smug grin. 

“They love me,” he sang, kicking his heel up as he turned back to the pasta sauce.

Geralt rolled his eyes and started screenshotting some of the less invasive questions, shaking his head and muttering, “Course they do.”

-

Geralt pressed record, waited a moment, and heaved a dramatic, long-suffering sigh, “You guys literally didn’t even give me a choice on this one,” he reached off frame and scruffed Jaskier, plopping him down on the couch with him. 

Jaskier didn’t stay where he was put for even a moment, using his momentum to bounce up onto Geralt’s lap with a shit-eating grin, “Oh? Are we rolling?”

Geralt dropped his forehead to Jaskier’s shoulder, stifling a laugh, “This is gonna be a long one.”

“Yeah, it is,” Jask agreed, then turned to the camera, stroking Geralt’s hair, “My fans want more!”

“OH-kay,” Geralt manhandled Jaskier to sit next to him which earned him a pout and a leg draped over his lap as he continued his intro, “I’ve got a bunch of questions from twitter. I didn’t even have to confirm which video we would do, you guys just went straight for the kill. I picked a few, Jask picked a few, neither of us knows which ones the other picked.” he turned to see Jaskier wiggle his eyebrows at the camera, “Why am I thinking you picked the raunchy ones?”

The brunet pretended to be offended before he smirked, “Only a few.”

Geralt rolled his eyes. “Of course,” he nudged Jask with his shoulder and opened up his phone to his screenshots, “Okay! First up is AdamSandlersBitch, nice name. They asked what Jaskier’s favorite gaming console and game to play is.” he turned to Jaksier with raised eyebrows.

His boyfriend cringed, “My.. my phone? I don’t know? I play a lot of Candy Crush while I listen to podcasts?”

Geralt smiled sweetly, “Wait what about Stardew Valley? I thought you started that?”

“I did!” Jaskier brightened up for a moment before he deflated again, “But I got confused and then the ADHD made me bake cookies.”

“Those were good cookies. I’ll play with you if you want?” Geralt’s normal ‘streamer dude’ persona melted away while he played with the rips on Jaskier’s jeans. 

Jask leaned forward and kissed his temple, “I’d love that.” 

Geralt blushed, even after years, Jaskier’s affection still caught him off guard. 

“Mkay! My turn!” Jaskier flashed his devilish grin and read, in his most obnoxious voice, “Dwn2Clwn said ‘do you two live together? Have you said ‘i love you’? And who tops?’”

Geralt’s mouth twisted into an upside-down U as he stared at Jaskier in muted surprise, “Honestly, not as bad as I expected.”

Jaskier looped his arm around Geralt’s, “I’m starting off easy.”

Geralt let his mock-disapproving gaze linger just a bit before he answered, “The living together is kind of new-like a few months. This one said ‘I love you’ on, what? The fourth date? Fifth?”

“Fourth.”

“No, it was the fifth, Eskel locked himself out on the fourth. Remember?”

“Shit you’re right,” Jaskier gave the camera a stern look, “In my defense, we’d been friends for a good four years before this. I wasn’t just confessing my love to a tinder date - though I have done that before.”

Geralt nodded, “That was very amusing.”

Jaskier tapped his nose, “Don’t avoid the last part, darling.”

Geralt huffed and stared down the camera, and, in the most matter of fact tone possible, said, “We switch. Compromise, folks. Can’t have one person doing all the work all the time.”

Jaskier nodded sagely, patting Geralt's chest, “We got a pow-”

Geralt clamped his hand over Jaskier’s mouth, 100% sure he was going to say ‘power bottom pillow princess’, “Nope. I’ll get demonetized for that.”

“But not who tops?” Jaskier asked through Geralt’s fingers.

He just shrugged, “I don’t make the rules.”

Jaskier tapped his phone and raised his eyebrows, telling him to move to the next question. 

“Mis- Mischanication? Shit I hope I said that right, Mischanication asked, ‘would you ever get a pet together?’ We did! Her name is Roach and she’s a little shit! I told Jaskier not to feed her, but he did, now we have the snuggliest, crankiest cat I’ve ever met!” 

Jaskier had gotten up to pluck Roach from her perch on the windowsill when Geralt had read the question and plopped down with her as Geralt finished his proud speech, “She’s not a little shit! She’s just delicate! Isn’t that right, darling?”

Geralt scratched under her chin and cooed, “You are a nasty little dragon baby, aren't you?! Just a little garbage child! Yes, you are. We love the tiny demon beast.”

“Geralt!”

He snickered and kissed Jaskier’s hair, “Next question, love.”

Jaskier grumbled something about positive reinforcement as Roach scampered back to her cat tree and he unlocked his phone for his next tweet, “This darling wants to remain anonymous,” Geralt gave him some serious side-eye at that, “they said ‘I think I’m in love with the flower twink, where can I find one of my own?’”

Geralt frowned at the camera and pulled Jaskier onto his lap, holding him close and snuggling into his chest, almost growling, “Hands off.”

Jaskier giggled, brushing Geralt’s hair out of his face as he talked to the camera, “You heard the man. Unfortunately, I was not mass-produced and I’ve been spoken for.”

Geralt looked up at him with what could only be called suspicious puppy eyes, “You picked that one just to sit in my lap didn’t you?”

“Yes. And because I want to change my socials to ‘flower twink’.” 

“Do it,” Geralt kept Jaskier on his lap as he swiped to his next question, “Eggsfuckingsuck - heh, my dad hates eggs- Eggsfuckingsuck says, ‘what is the most embarrassing thing you’ve caught each other doing/saying?’ Oh boy, do I have a story for you!”

"Oh I couldn't say the thing but you can tell this story!?" 

"...you have a point... Check my insta stories. I'll put it there after I post this." 

Jaskier nodded, ever so pleased, and turned to the camera, "Our dear Yennefer of sorceryglammour once beat Geralt at trivia night when the theme was 'video games'." 

“We did shots before we went to the bar and she goaded me and Lambert into a chugging competition before the round started. I’m telling you, she planned this. Yen is ruthless.” Geralt desperately tried to justify his defeat but Jaskier was having none of it. 

“She’s mostly harmless, plus I have video evidence from that night. You weren’t that far gone.”

“Pull it up! Let’s settle it.”

Jaskier patted Geralt’s head like one would a toddler, “I’d have to get my old laptop out. Later, darling.”

Geralt had a smug look on his face, “That means he doesn’t have it anymore.”

“Next question!” Jaskier squeaked, not at all changing the subject. 

Geralt shrugged, “If you admit I won that one.”

“It’s not a competition!” Jaskier laughed, looking down at him with that stupidly smitten look on his face.

“Hmmm…” Geralt tilted his chin up defiantly, “if you say so.”

Jaskier kissed him, lingering a little bit more than could be considered chaste, “I do.” 

Geralt looked up at him, batting his eyelashes, “Fine then, next question.”

Jaskier handed him his phone and he read it off leaning his head on Jaskier’s shoulder, “CountryBumpkin42 asked if we play any instruments. I play the recorder very poorly, but Jask plays everything.”

“Not everything, but yes, I could cover a Trans Siberian Orchestra song if I had a pedalboard with enough loop settings.” Jaskier preened. 

“And more,” Geralt added, counting on his fingers as he spoke, “In this house alone he has two pianos, three different types of guitars, a drumset, a violin and fiddle, a flute and piccilo, an oboe, a mandolin, a lute, bongos, saxophone, clarinet, tambourine, trumpet, and xylophone. Did I get them all?”

Jaskier glanced from side to side with a guilty look, “Ah… no, I bought a bass sax that showed up last night.”

“Oh, did Thursday at 3 decide they wanted to switch after all?”

“Yeah! She got the third chair as a freshman on a loaner instrument! I’m very proud!”

Geralt seemed to remember they were recording and turned back to the camera, “J teaches music at the university and does private lessons.” 

“It’s how I can afford such a pretty trophy boyfriend,” Jaskier teased, ruffling Geralt’s hair and earning a little chuckle.

“Mkay, what do you have next?”

Jaskier smoothed Gearalt’s hair back down as he read the next question, “3R4108F6!J asks if we have any cute nicknames for each other.”

Geralt’s eyebrows nearly flew past his hairline, “J has a new one for me almost every day.”

“Its true,” Jaskier nodded, “I am a slut for cute nicknames. This morning was Ger Bear, one of my faves. I called him Thumbs for a bit, I lovingly call him Dumb Fuck rather often.”

“And he is Dip Shit, it’s balanced. I usually just shorten names? Jask or J is usually it, right?” Geralt asked, shifting so Jaskier was sitting on the couch between his legs and they were both turned out toward the camera but very much still cuddling. 

“And when I’m being childish I get Alfie. But Geralt is much more deliberate and specific with his nicknames. It’s a bit of a friendship level up when he uses nicknames.”

Geralt frowned at him, “I do that?”

Jaskier giggled, “You never noticed?”

He tilted his head, giving Jaskier a quizzical look, “Not at all.”

Jaskier cupped Geralt’s cheek, “You’re so cute.”

Geralt blushed again, leaning into the touch just a tad, “Who’s turn is it?”

“Yours,” Jaskier hummed, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. 

“Okay,” Geralt blushed even more, “I had this one as an alternate, but uh, Yen asked what we’d name our first kid?” 

Jaskier leaned into Geralt’s shoulder and hummed as he thought for a moment, “I always like Blake or Spencer, but I seem to remember you saying something about old world traditional names?”

Geralt nodded, absentmindedly running his fingers up and down Jaskier’s arm, “My grandma was hoping each of us boys would be a girl and wanted mum to name us Cirilla every time. I quite like it, but I’m rather open as long as I don’t know someone with the name. I really like Eric?” 

“Oo, I like Eric.”

“But you like the neutral names.”

“I do, but it’s your hypothetical kiddo too.”

Geralt gave him a little squeeze, “There’s time for that later. What’s your next one?”

Jaskier snorted when he looked at his phone, “What are your guys’ love languages?”

Geralt just looked down at Jask, completely entangled in his arms, then up to the camera, “I’m gonna hazard a guess at physical touch.” 

“Yeah, I think that’s a safe bet,” Jaskier giggled, “I haven’t taken the quiz in years, but I was that and gifts.”

“Oh, yeah. Physical touch and words of affirmation. I got like a 0 on acts of service and gifts, but I really like giving gifts.” 

“Mhm, yes you do,” Jaksier wiggled his eyebrows, then turned to the camera, “I also had no idea you could have different giving and receiving languages till I met this one.”

Geralt nodded then turned to him with a slight frown, “you know I really thought your questions were going to be more graphic.”

“Oh, honey I saved the best for last,” Jaskier winked. 

“Fuck me,” Geralt grumbled before reading off his last question, “Cali852 asked what we did for Pride.”

Jaskier’s eyes lit up, “Oh Pride was fun. We watched the parade, of course, then Yen did our makeup and… and where did we go after that?”

Geralt looked like he’d been waiting for this, “We went to a club, where you ordered three kamakazis, knocked them all back, danced for twenty minutes, then I took you home.”

“N-no… we went to the beach, didn’t we?”

“That was the year before. We were going to go to the drag show at our regular bar too, but someone had just finished grading finals and went a little too hard.” 

Jaskier grinned, “Speaking of finals, time for the last question. I had a different one in mind but if the thing I cant say from earlier would get this demonetized then that defintitelyi would. So we’re going with ‘what is the wackest placy y’all banged?’”

Geralt snorted, “Shit who knows anymore?”

“Well there was the boat?”

“Or the train?”

“Nah, too standard. What about the cabin?”

“Heh, no I think your o-”

“I don’t have tenure darling,” It was Jaskier’s turn to slap his hands over Geralt’s mouth, “The answer is a dilapidated structure my parents still try to call a cabin out in the foothills.”

Geralt laughed and pulled his hand away, “Okay, that can be the answer.”

“Is that it? Now we just say bye?” Jaskier looked between Geralt and the camera.

Geralt shrugged, “Yeah. You wanna say the thing?”

Jaskier wiggled with a little pride and excitement, “Don’t forget to like and subscribe! Bye Fuckers!”

They both waved for a couple seconds before Geralt got up and turned the camera off. He popped out the memory card and was going to immediately start loading it onto his computer but Jask hooked his finger through a belt loop as he walked past and tugged him back down. 

“I’m tired. Snuggle with me.” 

Geralt hummed, “We just snuggled that whole time.”

Jaskier heaved a dramatic sigh, “I know and this is exhausting. I don’t know how you talk to a camera all day.”

Geralt stretched to set the chip on top of his laptop before collapsing back on top of Jaskier who had stretched the length of the couch, “Are you making fun of me?” he teased. 

Jaskier cupped his face between his hands and pulled him up for a deep kiss, “Oh never.” 

[ollyarchive]

Olly Alexander: ‘I want to make the community proud. I don’t know if I've always got it right’

By

David Levesley

As Ritchie Tozer in Russell T Davies’ devastating 1980s-set drama It's A Sin, Olly Alexander told a story from a tragically formative decade in gay history. As himself and as frontman of synthpop trio Years & Years, he contributes to a new narrative. But, as he reveals here, the insecurities and anxieties written into minority identities are not just a personal challenge: they can shape stories told by, for and about all his peers

It is the afternoon before It’s A Sin is broadcast to the nation and its star, 30-year-old musician and actor Olly Alexander, is buying a cat cushion. “It’s for a friend!” he says, mortified to be caught in the act of buying a plush feline.

Where once being the star of a primetime Channel 4 drama might mean greenrooms, watch parties and a celebratory afters, this is January 2021, so a flame-haired Alexander is sitting in his kitchen, drinking a smoothie the exact same lilac as his top.

“I’ve had a lot of restless energy,” he says, having binge-watched The Real Housewives Of New York City in between doing lots of squats and “watching homoerotic YouTube workout videos”. It’s not quite the normal build-up to a game-changing drama, but is there a better way to remember peacetime than watching a show filled with period pieces such as “friends drink indoors” or “strangers have guiltless sex at a house party”? It’s A Sin is both a masterpiece and a reminder that someday we will, once again, be able to be eaten out by hot men. “You’re so welcome,” Alexander says, laughing. “If I can bring anything to the British public, it’s a lesson in anal hygiene.”

Anal hygiene are two words we have probably never published together in GQ, but, more importantly, are probably not the subject of many – if any! – scenes in a piece of media not uploaded to OnlyFans. They are, however, the subject of a crucial scene in the first episode of It’s A Sin, in which Alexander’s character – an 18-year-old fledgling queer from the Isle Of Wight called Ritchie Tozer – gets rimmed by his campus crush, Ash Mukherjee (Nathaniel Curtis). No gay men watching came out of that scene not feeling seen and, like all the other sex scenes in It’s A Sin, it feels deeply realistic and fantastically homosexual.

“I can tell you I’ll never forget being practically butt-naked with my arse in the air in front of colleagues,” says Alexander, laughing. But by that point, he says, he had done so many sex scenes that it felt somewhat rote. “‘Ritchie’s got a dirty bum! Stick that arse in the air and look disappointed!’” What was interesting, he says, was the dynamic of trying to produce the most authentically gay experiences possible on camera.

‘WE UNDERSTOOD THESE CHARACTERS WITH A KIND OF SHORTHAND THAT GAY PEOPLE UNDERSTAND’

They were working with Ita O’Brien – a movement director and arguably the OG intimacy coordinator – but, for her sins, not a gay man. So while everyone would have an input in how a sex scene would be best shot, “There came a point when they would say, ‘Please tell us, because we’re not gay men.’” So then the writer, the performers, the director and O’Brien’s team would come to a consensus on how to make a threesome look like three men shagging, yet also make it look the best it could on camera and make sure “you never touch each other’s genitals, basically”.

Alexander says O’Brien’s input was a “lifesaver” for him on set. Although by the end he felt comfortable, he was at first intimidated by just how exposing this would be. “I had a bit of a hysterical breakdown. I was really worried I couldn’t do it. I just didn’t feel safe.” This was interesting to hear from Alexander, the proudly queer frontman of the band Years & Years, who “spent four years on the road performing and finding this character that I do feel sexy in”. It was then that O’Brien and the team asked him to bring whatever made him feel comfortable on stage into the room before the cameras rolled. “So I would sing before the takes, be a little bit of Olly on stage,” he says, laughing. “That was my way of tricking my brain and thinking it was a character. Which, of course, it was.”

Before he was Olly Alexander, consummate gamine artiste, Olly Alexander Thornton was a singled-out kid at a primary school in Gloucestershire (where his mother ran a music festival). He was, like many other gay kids growing up, bullied and harassed for being something “other”, which everyone is able to see long before you can define it yourself. “I remember being in primary school and I had long hair and people would call me a girl,” he says, and the wound still feels raw when he recounts it.

“I knew that was bad for boys. I didn’t like the things that other boys liked: I just wanted to play with the girls and watch Disney movies. Which obviously straight boys do as well,” he mentions, always making sure to provide caveats to include all facets of the human experience. Although the bullying began to subside by secondary school in Monmouthshire, he still stood out: he had big curly hair – “I was trying to hide my ears” – and would wear make-up or a choker sometimes on nonuniform days. “I think I was trying to figure out who I was,” he says. “Imagine getting to discover your own sexuality without any preconceived ideas! I mean, maybe that’s impossible. But it would be nice, right? Why should people bullying you be your first brush with your own sexuality?”

Like Ritchie Tozer, Alexander moved to London at 18 to pursue acting, but he also had designs on becoming a musician. “Because when you’re writing a song, you’re the director, the star, the producer, the writer. I wanted all of that! I needed that to be able to express myself,” he proclaims with faux hysteria. For years he found success as an actor in a diverse selection of roles: he appeared in Gaspar Noé’s Enter The Void, costarred with seemingly every other white British actor in The Riot Club and also in God Help The Girl, a musical film written by Belle And Sebastian’s Stuart Murdoch. “Then Years & Years just got to a place where it was going to take over and needed my full time,” Alexander says. So his focus moved to the music.

‘IMAGINE DISCOVERING YOUR SEXUALITY WITHOUT ANY PRECONCEIVED IDEAS!’

It was on their third single, “Real” – released in 2014 – that Alexander first felt his art and his sexuality really intermingle. “It was the first time I put in a male pronoun – I say ‘Do it, boy’ – and it’s quite subtle, but it was a big deal for me at the time.” This was when Years & Years were trying to get signed to a major label, so doing something so consciously queer felt like a risk (the band went on to sign with Polydor later that year).

While pop music has long had an element of queerness about it – you need only look at the artists featured in It’s A Sin to see how gay 1980s pop was – Alexander has long been frank that sexuality and success are not always seen as natural bedfellows. At a Stonewall event in 2018 he recounted being told during his media training, “Maybe it’s better not to say anything about your sexuality at all.” In the same year, he told NME there had been progress, but that “I just know there are people who are hiding their sexuality, so it’s still not gone completely”.

Alexander doubled down on it with the music video – featuring his Bright Star costar Ben Whishaw – where he “purposefully made it gay. There’s a cruising element to the very beginning. It’s slightly ambiguous, though, because back then I wasn’t quite ready to launch into being the gay crusader I think I am now.” In 2015 the band won the BBC’s Sound Of 2015 poll, releasing their first album, Communion, the same year. It became 2015’s fastest-selling debut album from a UK-signed band.

‘I JUST WATCHED LIAM PAYNE TAKE HIS TOP OFF, BUT NOW I’M NOT ALLOWED TO?’

But despite the success, and the realisation that audiences were either supportive of – or simply unfazed by – the queerness of Years & Years’ music, there is always an anxiety for Alexander about just how accepting people are willing to be. “I’ll tell you for real,” says Alexander, “I go out on stage – even if it’s for our own audience – and I’m like, ‘What if some of them don’t like me? What if some of them have an issue with me today?’ I always feel like I’m going to try a bit harder next time, try to do a bit more.”

While the character of “Olly Alexander, Years & Years frontman” is one that bespangles its performer with confidence, being queer in the music industry isn’t always an easy thing to navigate. He remembers seeing a tweet from someone who said Alexander’s sexuality was a ruse to try to attract the pink pound – a term for the spending power of gay men – “And it had an impact on me, because I’ve consciously tried to [be openly gay] in a lot of circumstances where I wouldn’t normally. And then for someone...” He tries to think of how to put it and comes up short. “It can chip away at you.”

He wouldn’t change a thing about his success, he says, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t times when it isn’t hard to be out and proud while also getting your foot in the door. “When we’re playing a pop music festival, I’m looking at the other acts in the lineup and there aren’t that many gay people on them,” he says. “You see how quickly your show isn’t family friendly any more because I want to take my top off and I’m like, ‘Well, I just watched Jason Derulo and Liam Payne take their tops off and have all these women in underwear, but now I’m not allowed?’ What do you do with that?”

It’s A Sin marks a return to acting but, also, a chance to refresh Alexander’s musical batteries too. Following Years & Years’ second album – 2018’s Palo Santo – the third album was proving hard to pin down. “I’ve been trying to make this album for about 18 months at this point, stopping and starting, listening to all the songs and... it’s just not feeling relevant any more.” Alexander had always loved Russell T Davies’ work, so when he heard Davies was making a new TV show he “had to be in it. I would just jump at the chance to work with him. And that was before I read the script.” Years & Years had just finished touring Palo Santo and, to Alexander, it felt like the stars had aligned.

While the anxiety of performing queer sex scenes might have been particularly exposing for a gay man like Alexander, there were huge benefits for him being in a cast and crew that were predominantly LGBTQ+. “It was a revelation. I’ve never been on a set with so many queer people. I’ve never even worked with a gay director, so it was a completely new experience.” Plus, being asked to play part of a group of gay best friends, portrayed predominantly by gay actors, meant the chemistry came very quickly: “We understood these characters [with a] kind of shorthand that gay people understand.”

An inclusive, comfortable environment was beneficial for more than just sex scenes and simulating a decade of friendship. It’s A Sin also required its cast to grapple with the issue of HIV and aids, not just as a part of the furniture – as we do in the 21st century, with our knowledge of viral loads, sleeping with undetectable partners and new medications such as Prep – but really putting a forgotten part of British queer history under the lens, who it affected and how it changed the LGBTQ+ community irrevocably. “It’s an issue that is deeply surrounded by stigma and there’s a lot of trauma there and a lot of fear,” Alexander explains. “I know, personally, it was an area that I was scared to really engage with.”

He mentions that just before filming he made friends with an older gay couple at his gym and in talking about the show with them he was offered a rare opportunity to hear about personal experiences of the aids crisis. “It can be so difficult as a gay person to feel like you have intergenerational support,” says Alexander. “Elders are so important in our community. You can get so much from the people who have gone through so much before and fought that fight.”

For Alexander and the cast, It’s A Sin was a rare opportunity: a chance to be brought together with a whole group of men and women who were there at the time and who were willing to share their experiences with them. “I feel so lucky that I got to engage with that and keep learning. I was just scratching the surface and there are so many stories you can tell from this period. It’s impacted us all the way until now and it will in the future.”

Starring in It’s A Sin has also changed what Years & Years’ third album is going to sound like. After the initial writer’s block, Alexander says, he focused instead on the music of the show (Bronski Beat, Kelly Marie, the titular song by Pet Shop Boys) “and it really took my mind back to the club” – especially in the midst of a pandemic, when the queer nightlife venues that are the backbone of our community are so desperately missed.

“All the music I wanted to listen to in lockdown was high energy. It was dance floor. It was club music.” This was the music that had played such a huge role in his early life in London, had inspired the first Years & Years album and a genre that owes a great debt to the LGBTQ+ community. “I think at their heart, lots of these songs are about joy despite crushing pain. I just thought, ‘God, imagine hearing “I Feel Love” on the dance floor for the first time.’ What a transcendent experience that would be.”

‘ELDERS ARE SO IMPORTANT IN OUR COMMUNITY. YOU CAN GET SO MUCH FROM THE PEOPLE WHO HAVE FOUGHT THAT FIGHT’

And so Alexander went into the studio – as soon as it was safe to do so – and created a bunch of new songs. Is it easy to find collaborators behind the scenes who get it when he says, “I want it to feel like Britney meets Rihanna meets Hot Chip via New Order”?

“It can be a challenge to find someone that really understands,” admits Alexander. He recalled being sent round the songwriters and producers in Los Angeles that all artists are sent round at a certain point, “And some of those people are amazing – some amazing queer people as well – but predominantly... You know, they’re straight, so it can be quite challenging.”

Feeling safe with his collaborators hasn’t been an easy journey, but now he’s in a good place for it. He also pointed out that it’s not just queers who can understand his vision: his bandmates are straight, he points out – “I really believe in working with straight people! Some of my best friends are straight!” – and his frequent collaborator, the producer Mark Ralph, “is a real ally to us gays”, who was always willing to vibe along to Paris Hilton singles with him.

A new sound – a queerer sound – isn’t just a risk in a world where Alexander’s performances are held to double standards and the linchpins of queer culture can still be seen as synonymous with perversion. The impossible standards queer work is held to don’t just come from the straight world: gay men can be terrible recipients of work designed for them too.

Russell T Davies has dealt with it his entire career: “There’s the problem of lack of representation, but there’s the problem that when you are represented, it’s just not seen,” he explained when I spoke to him recently. “You just learn to cope. I worry about it. I probably worry about it more than I say here, but at the end of the day it’s never stopped me writing the next thing.” But he gets it because he, too, is a gay man who consumes art and he sees the same biases coming out when he watches other queer-centric work.

Yet he was amazed that artists younger than him are still dealing with the same crises: “It’s what comes with being a minority. It’s what comes of oppression and you kind of expect this to pass. But then you talk to young people like Olly, who’s a different generation from me, and you find them thinking the same things,” Davies said. “I was lucky to have my training during an age when you’d be lucky to get one review in the Times. Now you live in a world of reviewers.”

When I ask Alexander if he worries how gay men will respond to a gay artist’s work, it is no easier for him to respond than it was for Davies. “Oh, God, you’re making my heart race now,” he says, breathless. “I should be careful, because I don’t want to demonise anybody. But I tried to really unpack this myself and... I’ll just sort of say it.” It is clear that this is intense for him: his eyes are looking watery as he tries to phrase it delicately.

“I have this – I think irrational – anxiety about gay men tearing me down. And I tried to interrogate that within myself and I think it’s complicated, because a lot of it has to do with internalised phobias and shame, about how I see myself versus how other people see me.” He begins to cry. “What I do know is that I want them to not hate me. And I want to make the community proud. It’s been at the heart of pretty much every decision I’ve ever made. And I don’t know if I’ve always got it right.”

‘I HAVE THIS – I THINK IRRATIONAL – ANXIETY ABOUT GAY MEN TEARING ME DOWN’

It’s tough being an actor asked to shed light and humanity on a complex phase in British LGBTQ+ history; it’s just as tough to be a gay man trying to make pop music that speaks to the queer experience. But Alexander is doing both and, what’s more, he’s being unapologetically queer in the public eye. There aren’t many LGBTQ+ people in the position Alexander is in and it must be exhausting, I suggest, to be expected to speak for the needs and fears of an entire spectrum of sexual and gender identities. After all, he’s just one man who wants to be proud of who he is. “Sometimes, when I feel the most anxious, I have a voice in my head that goes, ‘Oh, Olly, why on earth did you put yourself in this position? You really are not the strong person people think you are.’” But, he says, he is learning he can’t speak for everyone, even if people expect it of him.

Instead, he’s focusing on being proud of what he’s done – the visibility, the audacity, the bravery – rather than the critique of his anxieties or Twitter trolls. “I’m always thinking about me as a teenager and how I’m creating the person I wanted to be in the world. I’m actually doing it! Holy fuck!”

[yoificfinder]

Hiya! could you please recommend victuuri mutual pining fics? thanks!

I received this ask right after I posted this #newreadsrec of a fic set during the summer of mutual pining™ so I'm guessing you want more of that, nonnie? Happy to oblige and I'm also adding other mutual pining in general fics, including AUs:

Summer of Mutual Pining

hold me tender, hold me sweet by @crossroadswrite [M, 10K]

Here are a couple of things to have in consideration about the scenario Victor finds himself in:

1. Yuuri is wearing three different pairs of very soft looking socks because his feet are very cold, a pair of boxers, Victor’s blanket and nothing else

2.Victor’s never actually helped another omega through a heat. He’s barely had enough heats to know what he’s doing, choosing to supress them until his doctor’s lips were a thin line and they started talking about impact on his performance and making the supressants less effective. There wasn’t really anyone around when he had to have his heats, so it’s not like he even has the experience of watching others do

3.Yuuri’s room smells like sex, strawberry candy and energy drinks

4.Victor likes Yuuri very, very much and he has no idea what to do with himself around him most of the time

(OR: what if heats sucked a little bit and you just cuddled a lot and also being touch starved made you physically ill?)

if you can't sleep, don't count sheep by @lazulisong [G, 5K]

It's maddening to find out how much more he has to learn about Yuri -- but at the same time, Victor is glad of it too.

Lay Your Head by @kiaronna [G, 3K]

By the time they end up sharing a bed, they’ve already slept next to each other everywhere else.

reach out and... by @stammiviktor [T, 2K]

"Please, Yuuri."

resting pulse by @cafecliche [G, 1K]

For something all in his head, it can be brutally physical when it wants to be. But he’s an athlete - he knows how to listen to his body, categorize and interpret its signals. It doesn’t really follow that the smallest twinge in his knee could mean a very bad season at the same time full-blown palpitations mean it’s a day that ends in Y. But bodies are weird.

Victor, though. Victor is a stress test brought to life.

(Or: a story in heartbeats.)

The Boyfriend Series by @japansace [T, 5K]

Summary of first fic

For some inexplicable reason, Yuuri speaks Russian.

Now, as everyone knows, there are only two viable reasons why anyone ever learns a foreign language:

1. For school.

2. To impress a foreign love interest.

And Victor can’t quite bring himself to believe that Yuuri would be at all studious enough to hunt down Russian classes in Detroit of all places.

(Or: Victor gets jealous of a boyfriend that doesn’t exist.)

umineko by @shysweetthing [T, 4K]

Victor has never told anyone that he’s a seagull shifter, which is a perfectly natural thing to be and actually really useful for cross-training as a figure skater, thank you. It’s never really come up, but it turns out that seagulls mate for life, and Yuuri is becoming more and more important to him…

Other Mutual Pining Fics

Be my chef, Yuuri by @n3rdlif343va [M, 88K]

When 28-year-old Victor loses his parents and inherits his family's five-star restaurant, he learns that working for a living is much harder than he anticipated. That's when young, talented chef, Yuuri Katsuki unexpectedly arrives, providing hope in the midst of Victor's chaos.

Can these two work together? Bartender Chris, manager Mila, and sous chef Phichit can't wait to laugh at them as they try to navigate their instant attraction in the most awkward of ways.

Black Ink by Anonymous1313 [Not Rated, 60K] *WIP

Being together was what nature had dictated them to be. Alpha and omega. Their families had thought so too, agreeing to marry them to one another once they were old enough. A joyous union between the Nikiforovs and the Katsukis.

But Viktor had decided that they would not be controlled by what their parents had set out for the both of them at a time in the past when neither he nor Yuuri even knew the other existed.

“I was hoping as soon as you turn eighteen, you’d… sign the termination contract.”

Because after all, he and Yuuri were no good for each other.

...Right?

--

"If… if that's what you really want."

 "It is. I'm sorry."

i will go down with this ship by @thishasbeencary [T, 30K] *WIP

Yuuri and Viktor co-star in the fantasy drama History Makers, a show where their characters Mamoru and Dimitry are shipped by all the fans, which of course leads to the fact that fans also ship Yuuri and Viktor. And write fic about it. Yuuri reads RPF by only one author, therealviknik, and leaves a comment on every single one with his account, katsukiforov. Some fans pick up on the conversations and begin to ship therealviknik with katsukiforov as well.

Phichit ships it all.

never tasted rubies by @ebenroot [T, 17K]

Phichit puts up a poll on the radio website. It reads ‘What Do U Think About Yuuri K. from Hasetsu Nights and the Mysterious Caller Victor?’

Seventy-five percent of listeners said ‘lol they should just f*ck already tbh’.

--

in which Yuuri is an unwilling radio host and Victor won't stop calling in to chat with him

On Online and Offline Love by @alexwspark [M, 33K]

Gaming/Streaming AU: In which Yuuri and Victor are gamers, head over heels for each other, and hoping to one day come face-to-face. Of course, when two whipped, adorable fluff-balls are involved, shenanigans ensue...

The Power of Love by @kiaronna [T, 66K]

“The two Japanese singles medalists make a beautiful pair! Here, at the 2009 Tokyo GPF, we have the start of this power couple’s reign!”

Yuuko and Yuuri dominate the singles skating competition as Japan’s power couple—except they aren’t a couple, and when their old skating idol stumbles into their personal life, everything rapidly goes downhill.

The Secret Lives of Catholic School Boys series by violetlolitapop / @curls-and-cats [T, 72K]

Summary of first fic:

“I’m plenty happy, I know what I am. I’m a godless heathen who is in love with another boy and can’t stop thinking about his ass.”

“Victor!”

“It’s a great ass. Now I’m not Chris, I don’t know much about asses, but he has a great ass. His legs are great too. His whole lower body is great, and I would give a lot to be able to get down on my knees and–“

“Victor!”

“-tie his shoe laces.”

-.-.-

In which Victor confesses to being in love with another boy and makes it difficult for everyone involved.

Other suggestions are welcome but I won't include fics previously recommended under different themes since they're already in the masterlist.

[luckyjak]

Why I Don’t Ship Widojest: A Master Post

An anon sent me an ask about this topic, and I debated for quite a bit about how to answer it. Then I decided the best way was to do a long post like this. I put a lot of thought into why I don’t like it, and I thought to share it.

A few things: 1) I am not telling you not to ship it. The goal of this is not to say “Don’t ship Widojest! It is a bad ship and you are a bad person for shipping it!” That is not my goal, okay? The internet and fandom in particular is meant for fun, and if you enjoy Widojest then more power to you! Don’t let me or anyone else stop your fun! Lord knows I have shipped significantly more problematic things. All I ask is that you tag shit more but that’s beside the point.

2) I am not particularly interested in argument. You are not likely to change my mind. I am not trying to be hostile, but if you know reading this is going to piss you off, then don’t read it. A question was asked of me, and so I thought to share my opinion. Unfortunately for everyone involved I am a high school English teacher, and so I cannot think about anything without completely overthinking it.

About my shipping preferences: generally, I like all the ships! I was particularly fond of Widomauk before Molly died, and I now I really enjoy Shadowgast, but I also like Fjorclay, Fjester, Beaujester, Beauyasha, Widofjord, Clayleb, Lavorclay, and, as the only person on earth, Yasha/Caleb. Hell, if Astrid gets a good redemption arc? Caleb/Astrid or even Caleb/Astrid/Edowulf. Any of those ships could become canon and I’d be tickled pink! You can even throw Nott into the mix, even though I mostly ship her with her husband. Nott/Fjord? Delightful. Nott/Caleb? Weird flex but why not? Nott/Jester? Absolutely! They are the best detectives!

I just don’t like Widojest and I don’t want it to be canon, and here’s why:

Doyalist Reasons First:

1) Laura and Liam played twins for years, still act like siblings even though they aren’t related by blood, and it squicks me to think of them together romantically.

Laura and Liam are fantastic actors. If they were hired to play a romantic couple, I have no doubt in my mind they could knock it out of the park.

But why on earth would they want to pretend to be a romantic couple, in a game they both play for fun? 

It would be weird. I play D&D with several guys I consider my brothers, and I can’t imagine pretending to romance either of them in d&d for that same reason. It would be weird. 

Maybe it wouldn’t be weird for Liam and Laura. Maybe they are more dedicated to their RP, and they’d be able to push that aside for the sake of fictional romance. But for me, that would be the last thing I’d want to play, and I suppose I project that onto Laura/Liam.

2) A lot of “evidence” for the ship is the way Liam looks at Laura.

To which I say...did you watch Vox Machina?

That’s how Liam looks at Laura all the time. He’s the president of her fanclub. He’s her twinsie. He always looks at her with hearteyes. I have a hard time seeing that as “evidence” for him having feelings for her when...that’s just what his face looks like.

Now, for Watsion reasons:

3) It has all the benefits for Caleb, and none for Jester

Seriously. What does Jester get out of a relationship with Caleb?

Don’t say someone who understands her, because Caleb certainly doesn’t. In fact, the only person who routinely “gets” Jester is Beau. (see: their conversation on the ship.)

Lots of people accuse Widojest as being a Manic Pixie Dream Girl ship because...let’s be realistic, it has all the makings of one. Tortured, broody man meets young, innocent girl who teaches him to enjoy life once again? Wikipedia’s definition is “[girl with] eccentric personality quirks and are unabashedly girlish. They invariably serve as the romantic interest for a (most often brooding or depressed) male protagonist.” Guys, that is textbook Manic Pixie Dream Girl! It gets even worse because Jester’s character is a healer! You want her to heal him? That is squicky!

And yeah, I trust Liam and Laura to be more nuanced than that, but do you know who I absolutely do not trust to be more nuanced?

The fandom. The fandom that is already producing mass amounts of Manic Pixie Dream Girl fanfic. And as that’s where I spend a lot of my free time...egads. I do not want that.

The few Widojest fics I have read (which, admittedly, are not a lot, because again, I don’t like the ship. The few I have read have been tagged as gen and then come to find out, weren’t.) have the distinct problem of woobie-fying Caleb so that Jester can take care of him, and gosh, I do not want that to become a trend. 

4) Age Gap

Yes, thirteen years is not that major of an age gap. Yes, Fjord/Jester also have a large age gap.

However, there is a world of difference between “20 year old girl displays romantic interest in a 30 year old man, who decides he likes her back after getting to know her for months” vs “33 year old man decides to pursue a 20 year old woman after they danced one time when he was drunk and held hands and she showed general concern for his well-being.” One is decidedly more creepy.

(And would Jester be the one to pursue a relationship with Caleb? I almost think she’d have to, but again, why would Jester ever pursue Caleb when Fjord/Beau are right there.)

(Also, side note that I thought about making it’s own point but then decided it was petty: if Jester’s type is Fjord--tall, broad-shouldered, dark haired, muscled, then Caleb--skinny, red-head, shorter than Fjord--decidedly isn’t her type.

You know who is tall, dark, and handsome though? Beau.) 

And do not say Jester is mature for her age, because she absolutely isn’t! In fact, the whole point of her character is that she’s not mature, she’s very immature and childish on account of her being locked away and being incredibly sheltered most of her life! 

Also not a good excuse: Caleb spent 11 years in the asylum and therefore he’s only mentally in his 20s. Uh, no he’s not. He was in an asylum: he was not brain dead. He lived those years. He might’ve been crazy, but he was alive then. Nothing Liam’s done suggests that Caleb is mentally in his 20′s.

5) What would they even talk about?

This is probably actually the one that bothers me the most out of all these reasons, but uh....what would Caleb and Jester talk about, if they were in a relationship together?

Seriously.

They could talk about books? But Jester only ever reads terrible romance and smut. We saw when she tried to pay attention to the dunamancy lessons that she struggles to be interested in that academic stuff that is Caleb’s bread and butter. They could talk about their childhoods? That will go over well. Jester was locked away from society and Caleb straight up murdered his beloved parents. If they manage to avoid that, I’m sure they could fight again over income, what with Jester being a rich kid and Caleb being a poor farm boy. Pranking? Caleb enjoys a good prank now and again, but I can only imagine he’d tolerate getting banned from so many libraries.

They are a cat and a dog, literally. Caleb is an introvert and his idea of a good time is a quiet night at home with a good book. Jester’s idea of a good time is a party with lots of people! Yet I’m supposed to believe they’d have a happy and fulfilling relationship? Don’t get me wrong, many introverts and extroverts do get married in real life, but like...I have a hard time seeing this one working out. How many dicks do you think Jester draws in his spellbooks--which are expensive and time-consuming and require precise work--before that becomes a point of contention? 

6) He doesn’t trust her enough to tell her his secrets

Hey quick poll! Who in the Mighty Nein doesn’t know that Caleb murdered his parents?

Fjord. Caduceus. And look, Jester.

I have a hard time buying that he sees her romantically when he can’t even tell her one of the biggest things about him. And he’s known her for months at this point.

If I liked a guy, and I found out he had this big secret, and he had told Beau but not me this secret? I would think he didn’t trust me.

I suppose you could argue that he’s trying to protect her. But then that just goes back into the whole “he doesn’t trust her” argument. He even had the opportunity to and he didn’t during their whole hand-holding thing a few episodes ago!

7) What does their ending look like? 

Listen, my ideal ending for Caleb at the moment is “maybe after ten years of friendship he lets Essek tenderly hold his hand for just a moment but no longer” but that’s just me. I see a lot of people who seem to think Caleb’s going to settle down and marry Jester and they are going to have kids, and I just--

Caleb? Having children? Caleb, who murdered his parents and has severe PTSD surrounding that? Caleb, who was abused by his mentor daily for many years? You want to give that Caleb children??? Children who he would constantly worry may grow up to kill him, like he did his own parents, or worse, that he’d do something to accidentally hurt them in a fit of madness?

I could see Caleb maybe adopting a kid if one was forced onto him, but I cannot see him going “ah yes we should procreate!” 

Jester, meanwhile, needs like approximately fifteen kids ten years from now, I think. She’d love them. She’d just adopt an orphanage and let the kids run wild and be the best at playing games with them.

Also, character arcs are important. Because Caleb’s ideal ending is stability and Jester’s is exploration.

Caleb, traumatized child soldier who has spent the past 15 years in an asylum and also fighting for his life, and before that spent time traveling between the Zemni Fields, Ikithon’s home in the country, and the Empire’s Capitol, who then escaped the asylum and spent all of his time running, trying to avoid being caught by Ikithon. The best ending for Caleb is to find peace; peace that involves not having to move around anymore, and having a home again, something he hasn’t had in almost twenty years. Maybe that home is a tower in Nicodranas. Maybe it’s a house in Xhoras with six other people. Maybe it’s a quiet bookstore in Zadash, or a little cabin in the Zemni Fields. A garden/graveyard in the woods. Either way, it doesn’t involve a lot of travel from place to place.

Meanwhile, Jester, who was trapped in exactly one place for her entire life, deserves a chance to explore the world. Even when the Mighty Nein disband, I can’t see Jester being happy to just go back to Nicodranas and stay there for the rest of her life. She may settle down eventually, but uhhh, not for several decades, I don’t think. Part of why my two big ships for her are Fjord and Beau: Fjord wants to be a sailor again, I think, which involves travelling the world, so I could see Jester going out with him. Beau, likewise, is an Expositor whose job is to seek out corruption, which again, means travelling, which Jester would be happy to do with her. Hell, the three of them could go together, sailing and punching evil for all of time! It would be great!

(Also: her god is called the TRAVELER why would you want her to settle down and be a mom??? What part of her story makes you think she needs to stay in one place?)

Lastly

I apologize if this post offends anyone. I’ve just been thinking about it for a while, and while Widojest as a ship has surged in popularity, I suppose I wanted to make a counterpoint about my feelings towards the ship. This isn’t meant as an attack on anyone, again, and please, if you like the ship then don’t look at this as a reason to stop liking it! Fandom is for fun! Keep liking what you like!

And I can’t promise I’m always going to feel this way about the ship--hell, the VOD of Thursday’s episode may come out on Monday, and I may watch it and be converted myself. Who knows! I didn’t like Vax/Keyleth at first either, but it grew on me and now it’s one of my favorites from Vox Machina.

(ALTHOUGH Mr. O’brien I swear to God if you romance Jester while flirting with Essek in a direct parallel to Keyleth/Vax/Gilmore I’m going to fly to LA just to punch you.)

Part of me wonders too if it just comes down to character interpretation, if there is something about their characters that is clicking for some people but isn’t for me. Admittedly, I love Caleb and Jester’s friendship, and I see them more as growing like siblings that romantically, but I’ve been wrong before and who knows, I may be wrong again. But if it is a character interpretation, I just wonder what they are seeing about the characters that squicks me but appeals to them.

[a-singleboat]

(After) Operation IRL

Word Count: 1531

A/N: i combined a request i got with the polling results and so it made this :)

Now, today wasn’t a day that you normally would have contemplated your entire existence but it was bound to happen sometime soon. During filming that day you had gone and let words slip out of your mouth as you usually did when you were excited. They usually gave you a few minutes of panic but this time.

Oh, how this time was different.

During the time that Damien was pulling items from the giant operation man’s body, you had gotten so excited that you were running around like a lunatic. And, on accident mind you, you had shouted, “I love you!” 

Now, normally this wouldn’t be a problem except for the fact that you and Damien had been dating for a little over a month and neither of you had said it to each other yet. In fact, love hadn’t even come up. You were both getting back onto the dating scene and had decided that yes, you did like each other enough to go out.

After a few dates and you meeting his cats and him meeting your two birds, it seemed like everything was going great. Great enough for you to even extend the offer of going to dinner with your family the following weekend after summer games wrapped up filming.

At that moment, however, instead of going to find Damien and talk to him about your feelings like an adult would do you were in yours and Mari’s shared hotel room. You four girls had decided long ago that on outings like these, you would rotate rooms if there was a maximum two to a room. For example, the next thing would be VidCon and you and Olivia would be in the same room while Mari and Courtney would share one. The rotation of rooms had started way back to roughly five years ago so why stop the tradition now?

You paced in the space in front of the beds, biting on your thumb and probably annoying Mari who was trying to watch whatever program was on TV. You heard her set her phone down on the stand between the two beds and clap twice. 

“Y/n, you just need to go look for him and talk to him. We already talked about all the possible outcomes and I’m one-hundred percent sure that Damien will listen to whatever you have to say,” Mari said with her hands clasped together. It was almost as if she were actually begging you to go talk to Damien though you knew she was giving you command more than begging you of anything.

“Alright,” you straightened out your back and dropped your hands down to your sides. “You’re right, I’ll go right now.”

“Thank you,” Mari fell backward onto her bed so that her hair splayed out all around her head like a halo. “I don’t expect you back tonight.”

You blushed, face heating up the quickest it ever has, “He’s rooming with Shayne, Mari! I would never!”

“Shayne’s in Ian’s room for the rest of the night, not sure why but I might stop by to say, ‘Hi,’ later though.”

You grabbed your phone off the TV stand and tucked it into your back pocket, saying goodbye to Mari before sliding on your slippers and leaving your room. 

For a hotel that was in the middle of basically nowhere, you could say that it wasn’t too bad. There were working lights and an ice machine down the hall not to mention that the building itself was about three stories high, which seemed to be the tallest building around. The cons were that the hotel was a little less than an hour out from the filming location and required everyone to be up earlier than they would like to be.

Since everyone was basically on the same floor save for some of the crew being a floor down, some doors were left open and you could see into the rooms as you walked by. Noah gave you a wave as you passed the door and you waved back, the gesture putting a smile on your face. 

When you reached Damien’s door, you hesitated. Why you hesitated, you didn’t know but time couldn’t go by any slower. You forced yourself to knock, twice, before taking a small step back. The time you waited seemed like ages before a disheveled Damien answered the door. 

He slipped on his glasses and saw it was you, face lighting up immediately. He opened his door wider and let you in. You took in how clean their room was and immediately felt embarrassed due to your’s and Mari’s room being a mess. 

He walked over to his bed and sat on it, clearing away the book he was reading and pat next to him so that you sat down. “What’s up?”

“I just came over to talk.”

He furrowed his eyebrows, “What about?”

“About earlier,” you bit your lip. “It just kind of slipped out and I didn’t know if you were ready.”

You could’ve kept going but the look on Damien’s face told you to stop. He draped an arm over your shoulder and pulled you in close, leaning the both of you back against the headboard. “Y’know, for what it’s worth, I love you too.”

You held your breath. There were those words again, taunting you. Did you love Damien? Yes, of course, you did. You were going to take him to meet your parents and your sister as well. You exhaled. 

“Do you ever think that we’re moving too fast?”

“No,” Damien kissed the side of your head, a gesture that made your heart melt. “I think that we’re right where we need to be.”

Before you knew it, Damien had kissed you full on the lips and you melted into the kiss. You somehow found yourself straddling him through all of that, only realizing when you pulled back for some much-needed air. You peppered his face in kisses, giggling slightly as he squirmed and tried to get you to fall over into the bed. Eventually, you caved and let yourself roll over off of him and to the side. 

Damien pulled the blanket over the two of you so that you could lay side by side in warmth. You stayed like that for a few minutes, just enjoying each other’s company and talking about anything that crossed your mind. When you looked at the clock on the wall and noticed what time it was, you tried to leave to return to your room because you were sure Damien was tired and needed sleep. 

He caught your arm and with the most persuasive eyes said, “Please stay?”

You climbed back into bed and cuddled up close to him. He reached behind him and shut off the light, plunging you into darkness. Damien placed a kiss on the top of your head and soon enough, both of you were asleep.

The next morning, you woke up to snickering and a very warm body who was harshly whispering, “Would you shut up, you’ll wake her!”

You blinked the sleep out of your eyes and looked up at Shayne who had his phone out and a wicked smile on his face. “Good morning to the lovely couple!”

He seemed to be recording which caused you to roll your eyes and cuddled more into Damien, “I swear if I see that online anywhere, you will be a dead man, Shayne Robert Topp.”

All giggling stopped and a loud, overly dramatic sigh was heard. “I guess,” Shayne said before starting to laugh again. “Better get up before Matt comes around to get everyone into the vans.”

You groaned and rolled over, glancing at the clock on the wall. “I should probably go get ready,” you kissed Damien on the cheek and said your farewells to the two boys. When you got back to yours and Mari’s room, you were greeted with a cheeky smile and a perky Mari. 

“So, how did last night go? I told you you wouldn’t be back last night,” Mari wiggled her eyebrows and opened the door to let you into the room. 

“Last night went fine, slept well and had a good talk,” you dipped into the bathroom to brush your teeth. 

“That’s it?”

“Yeah.”

She threw a pillow at you, knocking the toothbrush from your hand. You turned to look at her with shock written across your face. “What?” you questioned.

“Next time bring me some piping hot tea!”

“Of course, Evil Stepmother,” you stuck your tongue out at her. “Would you like me to do your laundry while that’s waiting?”

You snickered as she pouted before finally leaving you alone. You finished getting ready before flopping down onto Mari’s bed. “But in all honesty, thank you for telling me to go talk to him last night. I really appreciate it.”

She waved you off, a smile creeping onto her face. “Yeah, yeah. Just name a kid after me, okay?”

This time it was you that threw a pillow at her, knocking her phone out of her hand. You innocently smiled at her with two thumbs up. “I’ll be sure to do that, Mother Gothel.”

TAGLISTS

Permanent

@gretavanyeth @toms-order @starlightfound @lemirabitur @grandmascottlang @lovelyh0lland @positiveparker @bippity-boppity-boopa 

Smosh

@andreasworlsboring101

[epicstuckyficrecs]

July 1st-7th

Complete

Birthdays & Other Natural Disasters by BetteNoire (WeAreWolves) (Shrunkyclunks, Soulmates | 4K | Explicit): July 4th is full of surprises. For everyone. (Part 4 of A Hatemance For The Ages)

Pole Position by roe87 (Shrunkyclunks | 8K | Teen): "I've signed you up to a pole dancing class," Natasha told him. Steve had no idea what that meant. "What's pole dancing?" he asked. "You'll see," Natasha answered with a sly smile. "And wait till you see the instructor. He's cute."

The Boy With The Thorn In His Side by BetteNoire (WeAreWolves) (Shrunkyclunks | 22K | Explicit): “Holy shit,” says Steve. “I’ve been knocked out twice by the same guy.”

Touch by rattlemeoldbones (Post-CW | 31K | Explicit): Steve found Bucky. Now it's a long road to recovery. A gentle hand or a kind touch isn't something Bucky has known for a long time, but now that he has a choice, now that he's getting better, maybe with time he can know what that's like again.

💙 he told me it wasn't going to be okay, and he wouldn't kiss me (but he covered my body with his body) by voxofthevoid (Shrunkyclunks, SHIELD agent Bucky | 6K | Explicit): “C’mon, I can take it,” he says, half a challenge, tilting his head in a way that accentuates the long line of his throat. Darkening marks form a violent latticework on his flesh. He’ll go to war tomorrow wearing Steve on his skin, and the knowledge is heady, even when he knows it doesn’t mean anything, not to Bucky. (Part 3 of couldn't get the boy to kill me)

Actual House Cat, Bucky Barnes by AidaRonan (Post-CW | 3K | Teen): Bucky loves food and naps and Steve Rogers.

💙 Quench by AidaRonan (Modern AU, PWP | 5K | Explicit): Or the one where archeology intern Bucky Barnes meets actual archeologist Steve Rogers and reaches levels of thirst scientists once believed to be theoretically impossible.

You Weren't Wrong, Buddy by AidaRonan (Shrunkyclunks | 3K | Mature): Or the one where Bucky's college class has an entire debate about Captain America's sexuality without realizing he's in the room.

Political Ties by AidaRonan (PWP | 3K | Explicit): Steve and Bucky are both running in the 2020 election against Schmidt. Polls show them leading the pack as the country inches closer to primaries, but Steve thinks Bucky sits a little too close to the center, and Bucky, well, it's hard not to listen when a guy like Steve speaks.

Not in My Wildest Dreams by debwalsh (Canon divergent | 7K | Mature): Bucky Barnes isn’t the Winter Soldier any longer. In 1991, Howard Stark helped him defect and build a new life for himself. Now he’s a modern guy, enjoying the company of other men, and keeping a secret locked up in his heart. Steve Rogers is newly thawed out, and shocked to learn that his old friend is still alive. Then Steve goes to find Bucky, but James thinks this blond hunk is a Cap wannabe, just fine for a night’s pleasure.

WIP 

Solitary by exclamation (Canon divergent | 30/? | 75K | Mature): The Winter Soldier has been a prisoner of SHIELD for about a year and a half, placed in solitary confinement under strict security when it was clear he wasn't going to respond to the best interrogators and deprogrammers SHIELD had available. When Fury asks a newly awakened Steve Rogers to assist, Steve is hesitant. He doesn't understand why Fury thinks he would have a better chance of getting through to this guy than all the people who have tried and failed.

💙 This Side of the Blue by notlucy (Mermaid AU | 15/44 | 55K | Explicit): Tucked against a set of crumbling, stone steps was a tank made of metal and glass, filled to the brim with greenish water, distorted sunlight filtering through and casting strange shadows. Playing tricks on the eye. A trick was the only explanation for what Steve saw floating there. This figment of his childhood. This myth. This legend. Within the tank, the siren bared its teeth.

[atiny-piratequeen]

Thank you for tagging me @cosmicmingi ! I'll tag @san--shine, @wonderlandsobsession and @fantastic-bby and whoever of my writing followers/mutuals wants to fill this out 👀👀 tag me if you do!

1)Okay so Against The Tide was such a hassle for me because I couldn't settle on one name and I resulted in a twt poll and asking my server of kpop friends for their opinions. Alternative titles were Quantum Immortality (from a theory and a Crywolf song), Through the Sea of Time (a pokemon mystery dungeon song, one of my faves), and Through the Eighth Sea (suggested to me by Alma. Bc the "Eighth Sea" is the sea of time. Get it? 8 ateez members, 1 sea to represent them all? Yeaaaaa-)

2) Okay so its so funny because it came before Wonderland even came out, but All Eyes On Me came as soon as I thought of the concept of an ot8 fic centered around Yeosang bc of him being shy and such. That's why there's a lot of cameras and depictions of Yeosang being especially excited at being watched, so I felt it fit perfectly 

3) so I made that AtT playlist (didn't realize the mofo was 6 hours long, jfc that might be why nobody's commented on the songs yet), and I'll just say I listen to a lot of Babymetal and Crywolf when I write. Not just AtT, but in general. Babymetal obviously for the "fie's on her anime fight scene bullshit" and Crywolf for my emotionally challenging (aka fucking HEARTBREAKING) scenes or scenes in general that have a more muted, down to earth feel to them.

4) As far as Ateez goes, I always have an abundance of fun writing Seonghwa and Yunho, tbh. Night Shift has me spoiled and now I'm in love with writing Seonghwa as a sarcastic, slightly passive aggressive being who's honestly just a big softie for those he loves and Yunho...Yunho has a heart of gold and I adore him uwu

5) Jongho is probably the hardest to write for me because I don't want to typecast him as this nonchalant, emotionless smartass, yknow? I wanna give him depth other than "big strong maknae boi" but I feel I might have to do a bit better to write him truer to his actual personality 

6) In All Eyes On Me, San and Yeosang's little cat and mouse game wasn't supposed to take over but I-and a lot of other people-enjoyed the dynamic of Yeosang building his confidence, all while San was getting exceedingly more hungry/sneaky. So definitely San so far.

Though Yunho is creeping up in AtT and yall will see more of that in the near future 👀

7) Reoccurring themes...at risk of sounding like a nut, the stories I put the most time and love into are ones like Against the Tide or for those who have read some of my BTS works, Still Standing. Fics that have intricate stories and characters feel real emotional, mental, and physical trials, but eventually they overcome. I do write these with supernatural, fantasy, and/or sci-fi twists bc i love those genres so much, but I just enjoy writing fics that make me and my readers go through the emotional motions.

8) I've honestly stayed away from hybrid fics for so long bc of how a lot of them sre linked to ABO fics that are written in very...high key problematic and exploitative manners, but thanks to Skunk San, I'm definitely gonna get back into writing hybrid fics. Or at least a oneshot. Idk man I'm giving him a tail. Bitches love tails. It's me, I'm bitches. 

9) I want to get better at making people laugh with scenes without making it seem forced. I've gotten lucky enough to have some people tell me they've laughed from my works and some scenes, so I'm hoping to throw some more giggles in for everyone without forcing it and ruining a scene. Plus we need something to counter all this damn angst.

10) Imagery. Again, back on my anime bullshit, but I've had a lot of people, both close friends and readers, tell me through the years that they can visibly see some of the scenes so visually. From the fighting, to the love making, a lot of people have complimented me on my visuals and descriptive imagery so I'm kinda confident in it c:

11) I know its early, but I'd love to see Against the Tide illustrated. My dream has always been to have something I've written, whether a scene or just my characters, drawn out. Its a little easier since the boys (almost) all have their halloween stages for their demon forms and such. I wish I were a better artist tbh. I'd love to draw some scenes from future chapters I have in my head.

12) I'm gonna pull from my BTS side for this and say Still Standing. Its already based off of a show (sense8) and it would be so neat to see sense8 but with a superpower twist to it~

13) I'd probably cameo in any given fic as that one person in the bg that disses some antagonist to the main charas in passing just bc they're assholes and they aint shit.

14) Hmm...i had an old wrestling fic eons ago that was a hybrid fic. I'd love to revamp it and clean up the wild storyline and make it a kpop fic tbh. It had potential and it incorporated a lot of mythology and I used it as a way to show people about some mythos they may not have been familiar with but I got too ambitious and it went all over the place. I'd like to make it over now that I'm more focused and mature in following my plot.

15) I honestly don't have one off the top :o I never thought about remixing someone else's fic or anything like that.

16) I don't often write about things I'm not comfortable writing with, but I'll probably say my casually unnamed wrestling fic comes close since I was in a very bad headspace at the time and poured a lot of my trauma into the story. It's… graphic. And I probably won't feel comfortable writing that type of content so vividly anymore. So hooray growth? 

17) I've never written an incubus fic to to completion, but @fantastic-bby makes me wanna try 👀

18) Honestly I adore the concept of sensates so much (from the show Sense8, and my BTS fic, Still Standing) and I'd love to revisit it but I'm not quite sure how to do it without making it too similar 😔

19) Both of them are BTS fics, but I've reread @haylokitteh We Need You and @readbeneaththelines Professor's Pet 🥵🥵

20) Hm..that's a hard one because I like to branch out to a lot of genres so it depends on what I'm trying to describe. But since I have to choose, I'll say Against the Tide, since I'm pouring a lot of love and care into this and I intend on showing you all full spectrum of what I can do with it.

[leonleonhart]

👀

more persona! this one’s all i have of it

It was a strange choice, choosing Shibuya for the classtrip. Most would think of it as something outside of Gekkoukan’s price rangeeven with the school being more high class than most of the schools back home,but as news started focusing more and more on the happenings in the Tokyodistrict it was clear that the city was in the consciousness of the studentpopulation. The fact that the faculty even agreed hinted to some sort ofexcitement among the adults as well after the results of the student pollcame in. They barely managed to cover the cost by restricting the travelinggroup down to the third year students, with a little extra monetary paddingfrom a portion of the students unable or unwilling to travel the distance. Oneof the leaders in the student council, one Ken Amada, sighs once again astheir rather large group pads their way through the streets as they’re guidedto their hotel, exhaustion weighing on his shoulders with all the pre-planningalongside the actual journey. It went unnoticed by his classmates, but the tripwasn’t the only thing that had him on edge.

The familiar presence of Kala-Nemi had washed over him theinstant he entered the limits of the city, the persona’s supernatural presenceeasily standing out against the anxieties of every day life as it stands atattention on the edge of his awareness. The city certainly didn’t have theominous pressure as the Dark Hour, more like the cozy country town with itsnonsensical arena. He’s learned that sometimes places in the world are simplycloser to the realm of shadows, by the power of some god or simply from astrong collection of consciousness. Kala-Nemi holds onto him like a cloak, abarrier against whatever summoned it from the sea of his soul. An otherworldlysign to not get involved, not that he had any idea how to in the first place.Though with his experience he’d make a solid bet on it having something to dowith that Phantom Thief business that’s got everyone buzzing.

Ken isn’t immune to the gossip either and he’s spent hisfair amount of time talking with his school friends, even a few of his formerteammates asked for his opinion on the matter. A mysterious group popping upout of nowhere and causing change through unknown means? Standard sign ofanother set of persona users clashing with shadows. Maybe he’d give Misturu acall if she’s free or try to get in contact with the Inaba group and ask fortheir opinion now that he’s got a feel for the situation himself. There’s afamiliar sinking feeling in his stomach, he might have hit the eighteen-yearmark, but his comrades were well into their adult lives.

Shinjiro however, kept off the front lines due to his stillunstable health, made sure to drop into the dorm and serve a well needed fullmeal, the both of them ignoring the weird looks fellow dorm mates would give asthey act like a family that never separated.

Not that he thought they should get involved, and not likethey could get involved. With his ownpersona keeping him separated from whatever was happening there’s little doubtthe others would meet the same blockade, the only ones who could solve thisproblem are the chosen pawns. They’d all acted under secrecy and continue to dosuch, but with pressure from the police actively trying to capture this group meant they probably behavedas carefully as possible.

Taking in a deep breath and letting it out in a long groan Kentakes his gaze away from the shop windows they were passing by and turning hishead up to the sky watching the clouds slowly pass while they all wait to crossthe road. A few of his classmates give him an odd look, none of them reallyknew him beyond council activities or pleasantries as all of his closer friendsended up staying behind. Didn’t help that he still felt the loss afterKoromaru’s passing, the dog the only one that still helped him feel connectedto the past. Everyone thought he’d just lost a dog, but he’d lost his closestfriend.

Ken was the only one there when he died, peacefully nappingon the Shrine park bench. It wasn’t fair, but the dog had been doing hishardest to stay as long as possible.

His wandering mind is thankfully interrupted by the sound ofsomeone talking loudly over the regular crowds on the street and even louderover the touring students surrounding Ken. Ken closes his eyes with a smile,reminded of better times in the dorm, of Junpei making conversation witheveryone who took the chance to talk to him in the dorm. It was so long agonow. He opens his eyes again and throwing a curious glance towards the noise,noticing the more irritated looks the people around him were sending in thesame direction. As much as he understood the irritation that comes with silencebeing interrupted, there was no reason to throw dirty looks.

A bleach blonde head stands out in the group, the one makingso much noise amongst a small group wearing similar uniforms, belonging to alocal high school most likely. The boy seemed to be leading a majority of theconversation in their group of three. Ken can’t quite make out what they’resaying but they are approaching the crosswalk slowly that still refuses to letthe students pass much to the increasing despair of the equally exhaustedteachers. The two following along side the loudmouth seem to keep pace with thehyper boy, the blond girl next to him rolling her eyes as she responds towhatever quip he threw her way. A little behind them is a boy with fluffy blackhair, a majority of his face hidden by large glasses, but there’s a gentlesmile on his face as he keeps pace alongside them both. Ken swears he sees apair of cat ears pop up from the other side of the large shoulder bag over hisshoulder, but it’s gone before the trio stop just short of Ken’s larger group.

“I wonder what happening…” The girl wonders out loud,occasionally glancing over to all the unfamiliar students. “I don’t recognizethe uniform.”

“Class trip or somethin’?” The boy with bleached hair says,unknowingly getting the answer right. “Strange place to choose.” Ken isinclined to agree, somewhere more traditional would’ve been better for keepingcalm.

“Think they came here for the Phantom Thieves?” The girlresponds with a mischievous grin, hiding a giggle behind one of her hands.Again, hitting the nail on the head. Ken sighs, sometimes people as acollective were too easy to understand.

Ken doesn’t think about how his stare might be too intense,too relaxed against the light pole he’s stuck himself to like an old poster. Heonly becomes aware of himself when he finds his gaze returned by a pair ofpiercing grey eyes, the stare coming from behind a heavy set of glasses. Theraven haired boy who’s now half listening to his friends mumble excitedly inlower tones than before gives Ken a smile along with a curious tilt of hishead. There’s a flutter in Ken’s chest, like the wings of a butterfly. A rushof nostalgic emotions stirring causing him to speak before his thoughts catchup to speed with his mouth.

“We came from Gekkoukan High on Tatsumi Port Island,” heblinks as he realizes the words left his mouth, “I… guess we do stand out heredon’t we.” The other two accompanying the boy current keeping eye contactlocked onto Ken, his gaze holding strong and unblinking like having a staringcontest with a cat, barely seem bothered that he’s spoken up.

“Anyone would stand out grouped up like this.” The blond boymutters.

“And you wonder why we get worried when you bring too muchattention during our meetings Ryuji…” A different voice comes from somewherewithin the small group, though not from the person still eyeing Ken though thegaze has gone from curious to playful possibly testing just how long Ken wouldkeep the contest going. Ken finally tears away his gaze to see if he can spotwhoever spoke up, but the three didn’t seem bothered.

“So how long you guys staying?”

“Only a few nights,” Ken shakes his head before adding witha laugh, “anymore and the students would be paying for their own lodging.” Thecrosswalk finally lights up for the crowds to pass, and he figures that’s wherethe chance encounter would part, but the trio walk after the group of Gekkoukanstudents. As far as he can tell they’re simply heading the same direction, andhe didn’t get a bad feeling from them. They made for better company than hisclassmates giving him an, albeit starstruck, cold shoulder.

“I’m guessing you just got out of class for the day?”

“Uh, yeah.” The girl looks uneasily towards her companionsat the question. “We were just gonna meet up with another friend at a café.”She quickly covers her mouth like she’d let a grave secret slip.

“Oh,” Ken digests the strange reaction for a moment, “is thecoffee there any good? I’m going to need something to revive me tomorrow aftersuch a long trip.” He plays with his bangs a moment before brushing them to theside and rubbing under his tired eyes.