#listen i know this is pretty standard

[uncanny-tranny]

Finally listened to Dylan Mulvaney's song and?? I don't get the negative hype about it, it was frankly a cute song. Also the "playin' catch-up 'cause we missed the pre-game" made me laugh, it was a good line. Dylan, you've done it again!

[intertexts]

how it feels living in a world where i don't feel the continual need to find dissatisfaction with things i enjoy...........

[sovereign-of-the-void]

Favorite Ship / Supernova

(disclaimer: i hc eris morn with they/them pronouns)

Lately, things have been calm and she got her paperwork for the day done sooner than usual, so with the free time Ikora decided it would be nice to have a spontaneous date. She sends a message to Eris, hoping they aren’t busy at the moment. At least, far as she knew there shouldn’t be anything taking up their time. After a few moments Ikora smiles when her screen lights up with a response.

-

It’s a cool, clear night where you’d swear you could see every star in the galaxy that wasn’t eclipsed by the moonlight. A sight like this wasn’t possible in the last city, and seldom did Ikora get the chance to venture out of it. Duty was a chain and it kept her not too far from the city, but in the rare chances she had the opportunity she wanted to take advantage.

Setting down a blanket on the side of a hill, Ikora places two comfortable, large pillows she had against the incline. Eris patiently stood by, their form illuminated by the light of the moon as they looked up to the sky. She wondered how much hive eyes could pick up on the distant pin-pricks of light, having been told they weren't the same as human ones. If you compared it to human vision, technically you could say they were blind.

Nonetheless, they mentioned their way of “seeing” just works differently now. They still had a sense of their surroundings, even knew the distance between themselves and the moon. An odd thing to be precognitive of but they chalked it up to it being the birthplace of their transformation, when Eris became kin to the very enemy they sought the end of.

How things have changed. Outside of that Eris had a sensitivity to paracausality which gave her a refined sense of other guardians as well as the shape of their light, despite being without. Strange changes, but not without some benefits. Ikora reaches over to gently bump her hand against theirs to catch Eris’ attention without startling them. As if much could startle them anymore.

“Finished?” Eris asks as they turn to look at Ikora who nods, the pair’s hands linking together as they settle onto the cozy patch. They lean back, side by side with hands still intertwined and multiple points of contact between their bodies. Silence hung in the air for a short time as they enjoyed the view, until Ikora broke it with a question. One she had long wondered about since Eris’ ascent from the Hellmouth. 

“Do you miss it?” She softly questions, gently squeezes Eris’ hand with her thumb rubbing against the length of theirs. “Miss what?” They reply after a short second. “The light. What you were, before-” Ikora stops herself choosing not to say the rest. 

A contemplative pause, “It doesn’t matter now, does it? It happened. All I can do is move forward in spite of it.” That solemn answer cuts straight through Ikora’s question with a knife’s edge. She turns her head toward Eris who continues, “Nothing good comes from dwelling on what’s missing.” and then a little quieter. “Do you wish I was unchanged?” 

Ikora frowns and quickly sits up, turning her whole body towards them. “I only wish for you to return from the things you hunt every time, safe and sound.” Eris gazes at her as she leans over to rest a hand against their cheek. “It doesn’t matter, as long as you’re still here.” She gives Eris an affectionate smile.

Eris’ own lips quirk up as they sit up as well, faces hovering inches apart before they make the first move to kiss Ikora. It lasts mere seconds as they slowly break apart but still close enough to feel each other’s breath. “In my darkest, loneliest moments, I miss the presence of your light over mine.” 

To think, after everything that’s happened including losing the light, Eris would rather have Ikora leaves her feeling a certain way. She feels the void open its empty maw in her chest, wanting to devour her heart over the proclamation. “Do you?” Ikora breathes out, letting the void energy trickle through her fingertips against Eris’ cheek.

Eris’ shivers a little from the sensation as they turn their face more into her hand, the ever present dark tears dissipate against Ikora’s radiant light. “I do.” Almost reluctantly, they retreat from the physical contact to look Ikora full on when they ask, “Show me your light.”

It comes out not as a question but like a lover’s request for their partner to share their body. And traveler save her, she finds herself bending easily to it. Usually Ikora wasn’t for unnecessary displays of her light, but she couldn’t resist Eris. So she adjusts into a kneeled position and brings her hands to hover in front of her mid-air.

Fluorescent violet light begins to form in a small, concentrated ball between her hands, steadily growing in size and luminescence. Ikora envisions in her mind pouring the void into a container, particles being shifted in an even circular motion that continues to slowly get bigger. 

It’s the size of a kick ball when she decides to stand up, purple light shining its hue across the two of them. Eris watches the nova bomb increase further and further until Ikora has to lift it over her head and release it up toward the sky, flying up and up to a seemingly impossible height until it explodes like a collapsing star.

Like a firework streaks of void shoot outward from the center and leave glittering trails of void as the bolts try and fail to find a target, thus bursting into smaller showers of purple that sparkle amongst the starry sky. An imprint of the void lingers like the burn of an afterimage from a too bright light.

“Beautiful.” Eris says in appreciation. Ikora sits back down with them as they reach out to grab her hand and trace it, making her shiver in return. She pulls their hand up to her mouth and kisses the knuckles of it, huffing a short laugh. “I’m glad you can still find beauty in the light.”

[copper-skulls]

guyes

[apocalypticdemon]

okay okay okay so i just finished the terror and i think i'm insane

[solar-halos]

hey everyone it’s me again. i know i’ve deleted + reuplaoded this same pic like a billion times but since im trying my hand at (hunger games!!) pixel grid crochet again i figured that i should upload this as a progress marker, so i present to you: my (semi-failed) mockingjay tote bag (ft my ugly floor pls don’t judge xoxo!)

[theradicalace]

well, i can confidently say that "explaining bottom growth vs bottom surgery to my cisgender coworker" was not how i thought i was going to be spending this morning

[zytes]

I had this one leftover orange image that didn’t really vibe with the rest of the set; the more oblique, hard-silhouetted lines were just more satisfying when shown alongside the rest of that mix — and this one is more unreal-feeling than the rest, as if cooked until slightly radioactive. another user pointed out in their tags that the prev set reminded them of Blur’s self titled record. I’m biased here, but I’m inclined to agree. album art warm af; also I’m a big fan of haunted organ music - and Blur never ceases to deliver in that regard, as long as you disregard their entire discography aside from the singular track above

[thecodeveronica]

"this is just gonna be short, shorter than the last one" I said

"it was SUPPOSED TO BE SHORT" I scream, descending into madness as I'm still not done but want this done by Tuesday

[tamaharu]

selecting keven r. free to voice the murderbot audiobooks is a FASCINATING choice. deeply enchanted.

[mercutio-stan]

Listen not to be dramatic but I went to war for the Shadowhunter Chronicles like when I was in middle school and my friends were like are those the books with the incest plot? And my dumb ass was always like tHeY’Re NoT AcTuaL SiBLiNGs

To this day people are like oh you like Cassandra Clare?? The pseudo incest demon hunter books?? And my GROWN LEGAL ADULT ASS THAT HAS BEEN READING THESE BOOKS SINCE I WAS 11 HAS TO BE LIKE……. yeah… 😔 the cross I bear 😔😔😔

[autisticlee]

sometimes I think about how my cousin who was born a couple weeks after me and was basically raised with me was my only one and true best friend in life. he was like my twin brother. he was my favorite person. he was *my person* and my chosen family, despite being actual family. he was the only person ever in my life even til now to treat me correctly the way I want and need to be treated. my memories are fading from that time. I can barely remember specific or detailed moments of our time together. so I can't give specific examples of why I was so comfortable and happy being with him. but I still remember that feeling well. I remember how I felt playing with him and talking with him. it's a feeling I have been searching for my entire life since he moved away. but I have never found it again. never connected or binded with another person even close to this ever again.

i'm often asked what I want in a friend. what i'm looking for. because I only ever talk about bad parts of friendships and how they fail. but don't say what I WANT, only what I don't want. i...cant say. cant describe. I want what I had with my cousin. I want *that feeling* back. what was thar feeling? it's hard to describe a vague feeling or energy or vibe someone gives you. but I can try to the best of my bad memory....

he set the standard for how i want to be treated by others. he didn't treat me as different or less for being different from him. i'm autistic and dont think he is??? (maybe adhd tho. but memories are vague so who knows) he seemed more... "normal" than me (basically other people would have seen him as normal and me as a weord creature) felt like he always knew what to do and did everything right and Iearned from and copied him. he was the leader I gladly followed. he was extroverted and inspiring. I had more trust in him than anyone else in the whole world. I completely believed in him amd trusted him completely. he was more reliable than all the adults in our lives.

he treated me equally and well while the whole world kicked me when i was down. he never told me I can't do things, never pushed me away, never bullied me in any way. sure we had our disagreements and arguments, but the fact that I cant remember a single one when I remember ones from "friends" at school and other cousins during the same time means they were never serious and we made up easily and quickly.

he never said "ew girls can't do this" like every other boy I knew. I wasn't a girl to him. we were the same. completely equal. I could be and do everything he could. gender and all that stuff never mattered at all and baby nonbinary me who never felt like a girl from my earliest memories was so happy about it. its still the only time in my life i didnt have gender applied to me and it was the best. I didn't have to pretend to be a girl, prove I wasn't one, change how I looked or acted or anything to be taken seriously. he naturally saw me as equal, just like him, and treated me how I wanted. I didn't get stopped from things I liked for being afab. he let me play with his transformers and ninja turtles that I never got despite asking for them (I got barbies instead and hated them with a passion). he got me into pokemon while the boys at school ripped my pokemon stickers and keychains off my pencil case and bookbag, yelling "this isn't for girls!" he played video games with me when the boy cousins on the other side of the family pushed me out and locked the door yelling "video games are for boys only!" he played with me outside in the mud and exploring in the woods when the neighborhood boys yelled at me to go away because girls can't go on adventures or get dirty.

he never said "ew you're weird for this or that" like other kids did because i'm autistic. he accepted and adapted to me and made sure I was having fun and could keep up. he showed me new things he liked and learned about things I liked. he never made fun of me for not being able to do things like he did or for doing weird things like organizing his hot wheels every time i went to his house because he "didnt do it right" and i needed to fix it before we played something else. he was patient and caring and made sure I didn't fall behind and never left me behind. if I couldn't do something he couldn't, he encouraged me to try and helped if I wanted. or he would suggest something else.

there was never any pressure. no worry. no guessing. no pretending. he was so easy to just *be* with. I didn't have to try. he made it so easy. and he never showed any signs of thinking I was annoying or a burden or any trouble at all. he wanted to be around me and play with me just as much I did him. he was my twin and we were glued together. he was my other half. two peas in a pod. he filled in my missing gaps. he helped me be a whole person. he was my crutch to lean on. he matched me in every way. we fit together perfectly. he played video games, I loved to watch people play. he liked to do comedy skits, I loved to watch him do them. he was the funniest person I knew and made me laugh harder than anyone else. he loved to ride my scooter while I liked to ride his bike. everything worked out so smoothly and perfectly even when it didn't.

the feeling I got when I got to play with my favorite cousin, my favorite person, my best friend, made all the other struggles in my life melt away and seem easier to deal with.

then when we were, between 8-10 (can't remember exact age) his family moved away....that time being apart made us grow apart. we no longer grew our interests together. he changed while I stayed the same. I still remember the souk crushing feeling I got when I brought out our favorite pokemom toys first time he visited after a couple years, but he refused to play with them like we used to because he ~didn't do that anymore~ every visit he did or I did we were more different from each other and further apart. I was losing my best friend over again each time I saw him.....until the last time I saw him and he didn't even say a single word to me or really acknowledge I was even there. we became complete strangers. there was nothing connecting us anymore. the final thread had snapped and my memories of him started to fade since then. now they're disconnected feelings more than actual memories. sometimes I even wonder if that feeling is fading or is maybe not the same anymore....I'll never know.

my whole life since the day he moved away and I was unable to stay in contact with him has been me hoping and wishing and trying to find a person to replace him. I tried so hard. I never succeeded or even came close. I still hopelessly try. no one fits that space he left. no one is good enough. no one makes me feel that comfortable, accepted, free, happy. I fear i'll never get that back. no one in my family is like he was. none of the friends I ever had were like he was. no one ove met or talked to have been even close to what he was.

he has set the standards for every other person so high. i've desperately tried to take anyone. but they're never good enough. they never meet my standards my cousin created. I can't keep letting all these useless people in when they can't live up to him. but i'll never get what he was to me back again.

i'm always told "one day you'll find your people/the one/the right person/etc"

I think I found that person already. I already had "my person" and now he's gone because there's too much time and distance between us now.

I lost that person, way before I was ready. in fact I would never be ready. I need this kind of person for life. we needed to grow up together and stick together. but, we haven't spoken in at least 20 years now. I wouldn't know how anymore. he's a completely different person. while i'm still much the same probably. still searching for my old best friend, my twin, my soulmate in other things and people around me.....there's no way to make up for that lost time and end up where we left off. I can never get back what we had. I can never replace him. maybe it was just the childish innocence we had back then that made everything feel so..right. maybe it's all "rose colored glasses" and foggy memories. or maybe we were twin soulmates destined to be separated. who knows.

but I can't help but think how my life would be different now if he never moved away and we grew up together....

would it have turned out better? would I have suffered less? would he have stayed my best friend? would he have continued to give me the exact support and care I need in this world? would he have been the shoulder I could lean on that i've never had up to now? would we have stayed as twins? would I still have a best friend?

can never know. but i'm sure at least some of it would have stayed the same between us or have at least been better than whatever shit I have now. maybe we would have grown and changed together to still match. maybe he would still be my best friend I could go to at the end of the day for some laughs. maybe he would be able to help push me in the right direction. maybe I wouldn't feel so alone in this world filled with way too many people...maybe one day i'll find someone who can fill in the very unique and specific hole he left in my life and my soul that never healed...

but also, what if I don't... :( he, and my short time growing up with him truly were one of a kind, once in a lifetime experience

[eggmeralda]

I thought the october curse was gonna be skipped this year based on the fact I got a job on the first day but like. it turns out that was the bad luck disguising itself at good news and it's just another normal october

[kavehayati]

Just saw the most majestic kaveh cosplay and I looked into the comments and saw the foulest comment I’ve ever seen and it barely made sense cause of typos I click the ops profile AND OP IS SIXTEEN 😧

[alex51324]

So, the NDA signed by producers of The Apprentice just expired, and one of them has published a tell-all article. Most of the article is about how they used standard reality-TV tricks to portray Trump as being wealthy and intelligent, when in reality he was, and is, a deeply indebted buffoon.

The money shot, however, comes when Trump and the producers are preparing for climax of the final episode, when the winner will be decided.

Per the FCC's rules for game shows, producers could not be involved in deciding who would be fired each week, or who would ultimately win: it had to be Trump's decision alone, like contestants and viewers were told it was. The producers could, and did, give him a presentation about the strengths and weaknesses of the contestants each time he had to make a decision. These were recorded, in case questions ever arose about whether the producers had crossed the line.

So, for the final episode, there were two contestants remaining. Both were men, one white, the other Black. They'd both done well in the final challenge of the competition. As the producers were summarizing the points for an against each candidate, this happened:

“Yeah,” he says to no one in particular, “but, I mean, would America buy a n— winning?” Kepcher’s pale skin goes bright red. I turn my gaze toward Trump. He continues to wince. He is serious, and he is adamant about not hiring Jackson.

In the finished program, Trump chose the white contestant as the winner.

(Four years later, Trump would propagate the baseless conspiracy theory that Barack Obama was not a native-born US citizen and therefore had not legitimately won the presidency.)

The article also describes how women working on the production faced discrimination based on whether or not Trump wanted to look at them while they did their jobs:

While leering at a female camera assistant or assessing the physical attributes of a female contestant for whoever is listening, he orders a female camera operator off an elevator on which she is about to film him. “She’s too heavy,” I hear him say. Another female camera operator, who happens to have blond hair and blue eyes, draws from Trump comparisons to his own Ivanka Trump. “There’s a beautiful woman behind that camera,” he says toward a line of 10 different operators set up in the foyer of Trump Tower one day. “That’s all I want to look at.”

And there's a third anecdote where he pressures a woman producer to break the FCC rules, while being casually misogynistic toward a contestant:

Trump corners a female producer and asks her whom he should fire. She demurs, saying something about how one of the contestants blamed another for their team losing. Trump then raises his hands, cupping them to his chest: “You mean the one with the …?” He doesn’t know the contestant’s name. Trump eventually fires her.

This information is pretty unlikely to persuade anyone who wasn't already persuaded by any of the other things Trump has done and said, which would for anyone else be a career-defining scandal. But it is a useful reminder of who we're dealing with.

(Link is to Slate, an x-number-of-free-articles-a-month site, but the incognito window trick works.)

[castillon02]

Jason and Tim have similar competence standards and end up swapping employees sometimes.

---

"Boss, I'm outta the game with this hip---"

"You're outta the beating-up-traffickers game. I got a guy who can get you into the scaring-the-rich game just fine."

"You mean, like...?" A fist into an open palm, quirked eyebrows.

"Nah, verbal intimidation only unless someone steps up to the plate. Mostly you got good eyes and this Wayne kid values having people around who can observe things that aren't spreadsheets."

"Hey, you said I did pretty good at that Excel thing!"

A pointed look.

"Ohhhh. I'm gonna get to learn spreadsheets and threaten people? Oh, man. Thanks, boss!"

"They've got the same insurance, too, so that'll roll over automatically."

---

Meanwhile, on Tim's end of things:

"I noticed that you tend to get impatient with slow results, that you're happy to yell at people for safety violations, and that your plan to remediate the company's incompetence in these areas involves 'firing every single one of them who can't get their head out of their ass.'" Tim smiled.

His employee smiled back. "I mean, that's why you hired me as safety supervisor, right?"

"Of course; your proactive attitude is one of the reasons we chose you. However, I also noticed that a lot of your frustration stems from employees whose work is being impacted by personal issues, often ones stemming from attacks by prominent local criminals."

"Listen, I'm from Minnesota. I know from cold. And I also know that you can't let a little hypothermia from Mr. Freeze screw up your numbers, especially not when those calculations impact lives." Squared shoulders, hands on the hips---yeah, definitely more of a cultural fit with Jason's organization.

Tim nodded and continued his pitch. "And you're competent with a firearm, correct?"

"Hey, I'm not about to go postal just because---"

"No, no, you misunderstand me. You're a skilled employee. I'm just wondering if you might benefit from transferring to a work environment in which you can shoot some of the people who are actually causing these problems."

"I'm sorry?"

"You have a dartboard with Leeds's face on it because he screwed up so many times after that Ivy incident put his kid in the hospital."

"...Okay, I admit that's not my best look."

"The organization I'm recommending you to has a printer next to the firing range; it's sized specifically for target paper."

"Oh."

"It's also an organization that works specifically to keep kids from needing to be in the hospital."

"Oh. You mean---" There was really only one group it could be.

"They need someone with your eye for logistics. Hood's work isn't 'legit,'" Tim made careful air quotes because the dorkiness tended to put people at ease, "but your insurance would roll over to them automatically. And you can rest assured that they take safety very seriously."