#listen i dont know why that first one is doing that my computer is always fighting me with these so. im gonna leave it.
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agendereddie · 3 months ago
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Karadec post-tranquilizer
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insidejiaqi · 6 months ago
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Sex for grades (kind of)
was not particularly the smartest girl in school in university. so i had to do what it takes to graduate
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i studied computer science in university. looking back, probably not the best choice for a dumb bitch like me. chose it cuz my friends chose it too. and the bunch of nerds around me were just not it. creeps everywhere.
in my first sem, there was this particular project based mod and i could not understand anything the prof was saying. whats worse was my coding skills were close to non existent and my group mates were all experienced code monkeys.
i could tell my project mates were slowly getting fed up with me. they would assign me tasks that i would take so long to complete they end up just doing it for me. but i do try okayyyyy.
one night i was determined to contribute something. so i stayed late in school to work on one of the tasks assigned to me. i convinced one of my project mates to stay with me. he was the kind of an awkward looking nerd that wears specs. the only woman he ever talked to was probably his mom.
while i was trying to do my task, i would consistently rant out loud about how hard it is and why i keep getting errors. he heard me and came to sit beside me to explain the problems i had.
i leaned in to point at my laptop screen, acting like i was listening and got my boobs caressing his arm intentionally. i know he felt it as he suddenly looked a little uncomfortable. i could see his bulge starting to form. he carried on explaining the issues with my code but i wasnt even listening.
tbh, the plan was never for me to actually finish it. i just dont want to get complained for not contributing :)
"how about i do this and you do this for me?" i stretched out my arm to grab the big bulge in his pants.
he gave me the blank stare.
"come on, you do what youre good at, and i do what im good at. no one suffers"
"errrr"
i got on my knees under the table and started undoing his pants. it was just us there. i pulled out his dick and to my surprise, it was about 5 inches. for a nerd like him, his dick size was surprising.
"stop looking and keep typing"
he immediately looked up and continued working on my task.
I slowly pulled back his forskin to expose the dickhead and my warm saliva drip down on his sensitive virgin dick. he involuntarily moaned and squirmed as i started stroking, coating his dick with my saliva.
"fuck jiaqi, your hands feel amazing!"
"shhhh. less talking, more typing"
I leaned in to lick the head as i continued stoking. he kept moaning and the typing did not stop. without warning, his hands came under the table and forced my mouth into his dick.
"ohh fuck yesss jiaqii. i always imagined you as a naughty dumb slut. jerking off to your pictures when we were first grouped together. never thought it could be real. and now fucking your mouth feels 1000 times better. fuckkkk"
he held my head down for a good 10 seconds while he exposes dirtiest fantasies to me.
"now get up and let me fuck you over the table" he pulled me up by my hair and bent me over bent me over the table. he lifted my skirt and saw that i was not wearing any panties.
"wow seems like this was you end goal since the beginning huh. wanting that pussy filled quickly so you didnt wear panties?"
"nuuu..." he jabbed his dick into me before i could reply and started thrusting in and out.
"fuck you little dumb slut. its okay. i will do your homework for you if you continue being a good little cock sleeve. now call me daddy"
"yes daddyy... fuckkkkkk ughhh"
the thrusting continued as he added a few loud spanks on my ass as if it was not a public place. he was still an inexperienced nerd and just 2mins later he pulled out and shot his ropes on my ass and sat back down on the chair panting.
"heheh how does it feel to lose your virginity?"
"tiring... how was it for you?"
"heheh here is lesson 2. dont ask a girl that."
he was still trying to catch his breath while i started packing my bag.
"now get that task done for me alright? its due tomorrow", i whispered in his ear before leaving.
"yea sure dont worry about it."
I went home and when i arrived home, i got a text containing all the files required to complete the task.
from then on, he helped me do my work for the rest of the sem and i got an A. heheh
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Appreciate yall for reading my sexual recounts. Writing it gets me turned on as well. If you liked it, do give it a like and reblog!
Follow me on twitter at @jiaqi2602 for short snippets and uncensored content.
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Till next time!
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starpunkssgalaxy · 10 months ago
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i’ve been super into the sbg comic lately and i thought i might share some of my headcanons of the group for fun, also this is my first post ever so 🧍‍♀️
- aiden used to have a yt channel when he was just a kid and he would post the most unhinged weirdo shit youve ever seen like wtf you mean you posted “pumped up kicks except its not pumped up kicks and i eat a shoe box” at 9 years old 😭😭
- tyler is soooo good with hairstyling???? like his sister would always ask him to do her hair when they were younger and he just got really good at it
- soo many times you can be talking to ash and have a whole one sided conversation before you realize she has her headphones (and listening to music) on and cant hear shit
- aiden eats jolly ranchers like a fucking FREAK he sits there and crunches them, its an honest to god miracle he hasnt lost teeth
- animals dont like ben but ben LOVES animals, hes holding a cat hes so content he loves it, the cat is in the most stress of its life
- tyler had a phase when he was younger where he’d randomly cut his hair in the absolute worst fucking cut youve EVER seen, taylor prolly has it as a screensaver
- aiden lovesss old 2000s tv shows, one of his favorites is Paris Hilton’s “The Simple Life”
- when the group has sleepovers ben and taylor have these like super extensive skincare routines and will disappear for like an hour and half to do their routines together
- taylor has a popcorn addiction, cuz girl tf are you doing having a bag of popcorn every night before bed (me 2 girl)
- after the phantom dimension none of them really fw media type horror things, everyones watching little kid cartoons to try and sleep afterwards
- logan is a lot stronger then he looks, i feel like hes not just textbook smart but also shares an interest in auto mechanics and likes to work on old vehicles so hes pretty toned
- and vice versa why do i feel like taylor has an interest in computers/robots type of mechanics idk
- taylor and tyler were the twins that made up their own secret language when they were little and to this day still use it sometimes
- ash knows asl and this surprises ben as he also uses it since he doesnt talk, ash uses it because she gets to overwhelmed with noise and even talking can irritate her ears
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tamsyien · 10 months ago
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. . . understand ``☆
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blade x fem!reader `☆`
. . cw: slight mention of blood, descriptions of making out
. . an: first hsr story for my first limited five star ☆☆☆☆☆ couldn't think of a better title smh
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you never understood blade. even when kafka tasked you to take care of him after missions. cleaning him, making sure to treat his wounds, all that stuff.
he was quiet at first. no words exchanged between you two, just comfortable silence whenever you would clean him in the bathtub. a variety of shampoo and conditioners perfectly arranged by the side of the tub.
kafka only trusted you because you were able to relax blade after his most difficult missions. which was weird because according to silverwolf, kafka was always the one taking care of blade after missions. of she were gone, then it'd fall on silverwolf or sam to take care of him.
"i also found it a bit strange when kafka suddenly trusted you to take care of blade." silverwolf said as her fingers rapidly fly across the keyboard. "why?" you ask, watching her in curiosity. "well, kafka was always the one to take care of him. so entrusting someone with that task was surprising." she glances at you for a moment, then returns her attention back to the hologram in front of her.
"but dont overthink it too much. it's probably something to do with Elio's plan." she assures you.
you always think back to that conversation with silverwolf, pondering over the details and the possible reasons for kafka trusting you with blade. even now as you scrub the said swordsman's hair of any remaining blood, you find your mind wandering over to that same conversation.
blade opens his eyes, seeing you zoned out and mindlessly scrubbing his air was amusing at best. although he liked the feeling of your hands in his hair, the water was getting cold, and you hadn't even started to clean his body.
blade lifts a hand up to your face, cradling it softly as he watches you come back to reality, blush creeping up your neck. you pull back, looking away as you try to hide your face.
"the water is getting cold." he says, retracting his hand after a few moments. you only nod, moving to wash his hair. reaching for the bar of soap, you prepare to scrub his body clean of all the dried up blood. but before you could start, a hologram appears in front of you, with silverwolf right in the center.
"kafka's calling you to her office." she says before disappearing as quickly as she appeared. the room was silent for a while as you wonder why kafka needs you at this time - she always knows when you're cleaning blade.
"go. i can clean myself." blade's voice breaks the silence in the room. "uhm... ok." you mutter, standing up and giving blade the soap before exiting the bathroom.
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you walk through the halls of headquarters, the silence almost defeaning. recalling the conversation you had with kafka a week ago, you wonder why she suddenly gave you a 'well deserved vacation'. you sigh, deciding to go to silverwolf for help. even if the girl seemed like she was always on the computer, she always listened to your ramblings. you're thankful for that.
rounding the corner, you remember that blade returns from his most recent mission today. you guess that kafka has already taken care of him...
you curse as you bump into someone. "ah, sorry about that..." lifting your head, you lock eyes with crimson red ones. there was an unreadable expression on his face - one you've seen many times after a particularly rough mission.
he stares at you, gaze burning through your soul. you shuffle awkwardly on your feet, struggling to find the words to break the tension.
suddenly, you're pinned against the wall, blade's arms on either side of you. you cower, lowering your head. a hand gently lifts your head by the chin, crimson eyes meeting yours. your breath hitches, his other hand wrapping around your waist to pull you closer to him.
"why weren't you there to greet me?" he asks in a whisper, quiet enough that only the two of you can hear. he narrows his eyes, tightening his arm on your waist. "why was kafka the one to clean me?" he asks in a harsher tone, voice dripping with annoyance.
you avert your gaze, stumbling over your explanation. "kafka told me to take a month off. she said i didn't need to greet you after missions so i didn't." you gently try to get out of his hold. it feels like your heart is about to burst, and you were sure you looked redded than a tomato.
blade tuts, tightening his hold. he's silent, which was unnerving. finally, after what felt like an eternity, he lets you go. you step back, trying to calm your heart. he stares at you for a moment before turning around and walking away. you watch him disappear into the next corridor, slumping against the wall, wondering what in the loving name of aeons just happened.
even now, you still dont understand him.
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for the remainder of your 'vacation', you could sense blade following you everywhere you go. you even had to take extreme measures (asking silverwolf for help) just to avoid him.
silverwolf looks up from her computer, bubblegum popping as she takes in your slumped form. "you can't hide in here forever." she says, crossing her arms. hiding in silverwolf's room was the best course of action for you because blade wasn't allowed here.
you groan, dropping your head on her desk. "he's been following me for two weeks! two weeks, silverwolf!" you complain, "i can't even go to my room without him knocking on the door every thirty minutes!" silverwolf only laughs at your predicament. you've been going to her every time you're troubled by something (most of the time, it involved a certain mara-struck swordsman), and she was amused every time.
silverwolf smirks, clearly knowing something you dont. "just talk to him. it'll be resolved in no time." she suggests, going back to whatever she was doing. you stay quiet, pondering over your options before a knock on the door is heard. "speak of the devil." silverwolf stands up, motioning for you to hide, which you immediately do.
"what do you want?" she asks, annoyed. "you already know what i want." blade's voice reaches your ears, making the butterflies in your stomach act up again. "she doesn't want to talk." the silver-haired girl refutes, narrowing her eyes. the room is silent for a moment, before the sound of a sword being unsheathed resonates in the room.
"pull that damn sword out and i will call kafka on you." silverwolf threatens, only to be answered by blade with the same intensity. "bring her out and i wont tell sam you've been stealing his spare parts."
"you wouldn't dare!" she says in an exasperated voice. you already know where this is going. you internally cry, ready to beat up silverwolf. the next thing you know you're being dragged out from your hiding spot and being thrown over blade's shoulder like a sack of potatoes.
silverwolf stares at you on the way the way out, her expression reading im not sorry. you give her the finger before the door shuts in your face. the both of you are silent for a while. the only sounds being blade's steps echoing through the empty corridor.
"blade, put me down." you firmly say, squirming in his grasp. he only shakes his head. "put me down!" you say a bit more louder, now actively trying to get out of his hold. blade only tightens his grip on your waist. you sigh, knowing there's no point in fighting him.
"i will never understand you."
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you're proven wrong when one night and a lengthy confession later, you're laying on blade's bed, his arms wrapped around you. the memory of last night is still fresh in your mind.
his lips meeting yours in a feverish kiss. his soft hair intertwined with your fingers, his smell intoxicating - you guess all the products you used on him finally paid off. the way his hands settled on your waist, the kiss becoming hotter and deeper by the second. your heart beats faster with all the feelings you've never understood before, choosing to push them to the back of your mind. now they resurface as blade whispers sweet i love you's against your too hot skin. his hands roaming your body as emotions start to unravel from the deepest parts of your heart -
blade's cold skin snaps you back to reality. he nudges your shirt up, settling his hand on your bare waist. his gaze on you never falters - piercing through your soul as if reading your innermost thoughts. he pulls you closer to him, burying his face into the crook of your neck, his warm breath tickling you a bit. you smile, combing through his soft black hair, untangling the knots from it. you let him rest, the tranquility of the room lulling you to sleep.
maybe you did understand blade. just a bit.
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an: this is so messy jsjsjsjsjsjjj i cant think of a proper name for this so yall have to put up with the current one :p
there's so many plot holes in this istg. maybe i'll make a part 2 who knows 🤷‍♀️
this is the start of a 7 day writing challenge which i will hopefully finish (please i just want my motivation to write back)
© tamsyien 2024 , do not repost, copy, or translate
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spookythesillyfella · 1 day ago
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This is going to be a weird inbox to get considering it's 3 in the morning (On my end) as I do sent it but I've been wondering if you ever associated any song with digitaltime? This is a relatively new question for me to ask anyone since I don't usually go digging for ships out of the idea MAYBE people may feel embarrassed/uncomfortable talking about it? (Even if it did give them comfort!) If not song(s) at least maybe you can talk about them a bit, I used to love digitaltime back when I first joined dhmis in 2016 so I'm always really amazed the ship LIVES ON somewhere! (FEEL FREE TO TALK ABOUT SONGS AND HEADCANONS/IDEAS if you wanna do both I'd LOVE to hear!) I've been meaning to inbox you for days actually! Just couldn't seem to get myself to do so relating to mental health crisis haha. I'm hoping I'll be able to reach out WAY MROE OFTEN just to remind you I am here!! Really always excited/interested in what you have to say even if I've not expressed it forwardly back at least this way uuhh uh. You can ignore this </3 I know it's been hard lately!
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Stay strong !!
HII !!!! HI HELLOO HIII !!!! :DDDD
ouhhh goodness i adore thiz question – i love listening to muzic and thinking about theze lozerz X33 I JUST NEVER GET THE CHANCE TO CUZ NO ONE AROUND CAREZ ABOUT THEMMM >X[
i actually have quite a lot but i cant just go on a 3 hour analysis of all the onez . so might az well give you the short n sweet of it – i really wouldn't want to waste your precious time ahaha ¥_^
★ "505" – Arctic Monkeys ; probably my favorite on the list but itz also one of the most SELF INDULGENT
the lyricz are just really fitting with my vizion of them – the lyricz "I'm going back to 505 // If it's a seven hour flight or a forty-five minute drive // In my imagination, you're waitin' lyin' on your side // With your hands between your thighs" fit with the fact they really love one another tremendously – their devotion
also the lyricz "Not shy of a spark // The knife twists at the thought that I should fall short of the mark // Frightened by the bite, though it's no harsher than the bark // The middle of adventure, such a perfect place to start" and "But I crumble completely when you cry // It seems like once again you've had to greet me with goodbye // I'm always just about to go and spoil the surprise // Take my hands off of your eyes too soon" LIKE I DUNNO HOW TO EXPLAIN THEZE BUT THEY REALLY REALLY DOMAKE ME THINK OF THEM ........
★ "I Wanna Be Yours" – Arctic Monkeys [dont ask why i associate them with Arctic Monkeys so much . okay ???]
y'know how Colin tendz to talk a lot about how clever and cool and useful he iz ? i think thiz song iz very fitting to how he'd want to be like . useful for Tone – the peak of intimacy iz to be uzed . something something etcetera
★ "As The World Caves In" – Matt Maltese
fitting from Tonyz perspective . in my opinion – how he'd want to spend hiz remaining time alongside Colin . even if . in the grand scheme of everything . itz such a small speck ; how Colin makez Tony feel fulfilled . and how even when all run out of time . hez happy to have spent it together – none wasted
★ a couple of honorable mentionz that i won't go in depth on :
– "Cigarettes out the Window" – TV Girl [mostly cuz i wanna do an in-depth au related analysis on it sometime in the mear future]
– "Show Me How" – Men I Trust [would like to analyze thiz one too but can't really see myself doing it ; the lyricz "Tell me why // Your hands are cold" are rlly hv digitaltime though i swear]
– "Daisy Bell" – Harry Dacre [iz thiz in part cuz Colin iz a computer ? if i answer that question truthfully . you'll chase me with pitchforkz]
– "My Love Mine All Mine" – Mitski [i can't go in depth about thiz without bursting into tearz ; i really love it]
– "Lovers Rock" – TV Girl [im scared of talking about love ; love iz very scary to me]
– "P.U.N.K Girl" – Heavenly
– "Who Knew" – The Correspondents [a relatively new song ive started listening to and i hadn't had the chance to properly dissect the lyricz and analyze them – but . since it remindz me of me n my lover . therez a 90-ish% chance it remindz me of them too]
TYSM FOR THE ASK AGAIN !!!!!!!!! I LITERALLY LOVE TALKING ABOUT DIGITALTIME – THEZE FREAKZ ALWAYZ LINGER IN MY MIND !!!!!!!!!!! IVE BEEN SO STUMPED WHEN IT COMEZ TO IDEAZ TO WRITE AND / OR DRAW THEM SO JUST GETTING TO GET SOMETHING OUTTA MY BRAIN IZ REALLY GOOD
TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF CUZ ILYSM !!!!!! YOU HAVE NO CLUE HOW HAPPY THIZ ASK ACTUALLY MADE ME . SO THANK YOU <33
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kittygamer2888 · 9 months ago
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[Long text post warning]
Guys.. there's something I need to confess..
*Ahem*
If you guys ever thought that my Sonic and Sonic.exe phase are bad.. just know, that..
My Minecraft phase was even WORSE as a kid.
NO- FR- I used to play the game so much on my mom's old computer, I accidentally got blown up by my first mob, which was a Creeper (because I genuinely thought it was harmless), I even got 2 Minecraft plushies (I think.?) And a Minecraft poster of a cat chasing a creeper. I used to have 2 posters, but one of them just didn't wanna stick on the wall, so my mom had to put it away because the corner were already ripped a bit. I even used to have this big Minecraft torch that I would put on my wall as a nightlight (but it eventually faded in light and had to be put away as well)-- hell, I even have a Minecraft bed sheet as well as 2 pillow covers for my 2 pillows (because I had a little Among us phase and now have a blanket, 2 plushies, and a pillow cover relating to that game- BUT WE DONT TALK ABOUT THAT ^^"). And if you think that isn't enough, I have 2 little figures of Alex and this... Blaze (I think thats what it was..? Idk), both of them in minecarts stored inside of the little pokeballs I have on the desk close to the mirror. I think I might have a few Minecraft related stuff hidden away, but I'm too lazy to think about them since I just woke up and started writing this-- but yea....
I even used to have the Minecraft Story Mode games, and even Minecraft on the Xbox because WHY NOT?! :]
Though.. I didn't play Minecraft on the Xbox as much since I was so used to the PC version, so it was a bit hard to control it.
Not only that, but the fact I used to hear fanmade Minecraft parody songs of popular songs at the time.... I used to hear so many parodies of my favorite songs, even the infamous "Don't Mine at Night" song 😭
I used to hear it so much that, now when I hear those said popular songs on the radio I always play when I'm asleep, I start to remember the lyrics of those Minecraft parody songs more than the actual songs playing on the radio WHICH- MIND YOU- ITS STILL MY FAVORITE RADIO STATION TO THIS DAY DESPITE THE OBVIOUS SUGGESTIVE SONGS💀😭
But they bring back old classics sometimes and even some good new songs, so its all good👍 (and hey, maybe even a bit of Disney songs at rare times, or maybe some songs that I've heard in animation memes- those are always fun to stumble into when listening to the same radio station for years, now.)
But uhmm.................
Yea-
But I guess I can't say my Minecraft phase wasn't too bad, per se...? Because I did the same with My Little Pony, The Powerpuff Girls, Pokemon, Five Nights at Freddy's(that phase was.... hell, actually. I couldn't stop talking about the game to my parents- and because of the movie that came out a long time ago but is still recent- it boosted the little fnaf phase that i had left hanging by a thread due to my Sonic phase taking over, i got to buy fnaf merch as well--), Bendy and The Ink Machine(it was a bit minor, but it definitely did a very good impact to my phase with FNAF), Cuphead(again, i watched gameplay and started hearing cuphead fan songs over and over, and i even have both Cuphead games that i never finished- i think i used to have a comic dub phase where i would watch so many cuphead dubs as well as FNAF and Baldi's Basics), Just Shapes and Beats (again- i just watched so much gameplay, I even had an animation meme phase that lasted up to 2022, and played the Story Mode many times as well as making my parents play the multi-player mode with me :])-- Fandroid, and then there was a bit of Osu one day, then I went from Nightcore to hearing Vocaloid, and then FNF (which was just watching the gameplays of almost all of the fnf mods I knew as well as hearing some of the fnf mod songs over and over, which i still do! It's just... filled with demon hedgehogs that have a little word next to them called "EXE", so uhm... YEA-), and not only that, but fnf mods were actually the ones that introduced me to the Fleetway comics and even started my Sonic.exe phase (which I still have.......-) and then I eventually watched gameplay of the Sonic.exe fan games, too.)
So, uhm...
Me having a Sonic phase isn't exactly new...
But I'm back to buying merch. And when I say that, I mean like.. I got at least 3 T-shirts of this blue gumball son of a gun, 2 Shadow plushes, 3 Sonic plushes, a rectangle package that has at least 4 or 3 official Sonic art as frames to put on the wall (but I never did because the nails that I see in my room are kinda running out, so it's just sitting there on the floor, using the wall as support to keep it up), a little Sonic school pouch to put in my school stuff, some Sonic stickers--
I think it's obvious that you can find a little bit of everything in my room.
So uh.....
Yah....
That's uhm... that's all--
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canonsinthehead · 7 months ago
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(Repost) Naruto/Boruto Headcanon: Chocolate Flavored Potato Chips, The Marriage of Karui & Chouji pt.1
SINCE I COULDN’T FIND ANYTHING ABOUT IT AND NOBODY SEEMS TO CARE, HERE IS IT. Let’s discuss the infamous couple that got people confused but I love them. It is such an unusual match and THE POTENTIAL FOR GOOD CONTENT IS HUUUUGE but you know how Naruto/Boruto writers are (not even going to go on how they met). Anyways we will go into a story/headcanon I’ve came up with going over their marriage ceremony. Hope you enjoy.
I Dont know if it needs mentionning but this has nothing to do with the Hollywood/Modern AU on this blog.
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As we have seen for Hinata & Naruto, marriages are momenst when many (different) people get together in one accord to celebrate love. Well in the case of Karui and Chouji it's no different but with a twist. Based on the nature of their relationship, it is an occasion for two different countries to ‘’visit’’ and ‘’experience’’ each other's cultures just like Temari and Shikamaru’s marriage would (still waiting for that damn samba of Suna to show up). Kumo is a huge country yet many people in Konoha don’t know much about it (it's not as familiar to them as Suna). It’s like ‘’that country over there’’ & ‘’those foreigners”. The fact that the event took place in Kumo and not Konoha was a source of stress (fear of the unknown or a catastrophe knowing Killer Bee would be MC-ing the event) and curiosity. I Want to mention in this headcanon, they get married after Naruto & Hinata, and everybody lives.
In other words, It's Chouji & Karui's wedding. Get ready for a ride full of groove, love, and surprises. Also, my writing during the headcanon is not as bad as this intro don’t worry…
This is a repost from my old deleted Tumblr blog, it's already written and will not take long to post all parts. I’m currently trying to finish and post every project collecting dust in the drafts and in my computer, so enjoy.
-REACTION TO THE EVENT
TEAM 7
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Naruto is LIVING, he cannot wait for the ceremony to take place. He has been waiting, preparing his stamina and dance moves for weeks; Killer Bee gave him personal intel on how the ceremony would play out and he cannot shake off his excitement. He went and told EVERYONE he knew that high-quality, the best of the ninja world, grilled beef is going to be served at the event. Naruto kept announcing that if you wanted to grab your ONLY CHANCE IN THIS LIFETIME to see Shikamaru dance (or anything adjacent to it) DON’T WASTE IT AWAY! Since he is part of the best men/bridesmaid’s crew (along with Samui, Samui’s brother, Mabui, Darui, Omoi, and other Kumo ninjas making him and Ino the only ones from Konoha in the team) and has something special organized for the event.
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Sasuke wants to DIE. Not only he tried the best he could to escape this event knowing it took place in Kumo. Just by hearing Killer Bee's announcement, his brain started melting. He can sense the tsunami of problems from here and wants NONE OF IT. Unfortunately, Karin and Suigetsu wanted to go for good food and ‘’to have a good time’’. Suigetsu kept saying how the people of Kumo know how to have fun, but Sasuke can see through him and knows he will be sneaking in the shadows to get an autograph from Killer Bee. He doesn’t and will never understand Suigetsu’s music taste.
When he thought (ohhhh he thought) his suffering couldn’t get any worse, Itachi and Shisui insisted to go with him (somebody kill him). First, he doesn’t understand why Itachi was so enthusiastic to go (like he knows something he don’t know like always), and let’s not get started with Shisui and his dorky clown behind. This guy tagged along Itachi in the name of some grilled beef (Sasuke don’t see what up with this piece of flesh everyone goes crazy about, he thinks it’s gross since he is the most strict pescatarian you can find out there). Shisui has been practicing his ‘’groove’’ (poor attempt to fit in based on stereotype, I mean he listen to too much rap.) Sasuke knows he has a trick up his sleeve, and he is preparing to be a nation-wide embarrassment (I mean even alien would shake their head at him).
When Sasuke wanted to rip off every hair from his head, Madara (yes, him looking youthful like he just got reanimated) tagged along in the name of representing the Uchiha Clan (look the lie smh). When he found out, he got into heated arguments with any family members he fell on to find the reason for this weird turn of events but regardless of who he asked nobody knows (not even Fugaku, yep he is alive). Madara says he is bringing Obito with him so he can change his mind from his dead girlfriend (lol Rin is alive and coming too).
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Sakura thought it was just another exciting wedding ceremony to participate in, something special to her dear friends. Since her friends will help and participate in her (eventual) wedding she must join in also because she vowed to do the same for everybody. It is a fun time for her, tasting the food, meeting new people, seeing everyone looking cute, and enjoying wedding drama (alongside Ino).
 One day as she was trying to find what to wear for the event, Ino showed her bridesmaid’s’ dress who goes with the theme/colors of the event (red & satin).
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While the dress had a simple design, Sakura felt it was a little ‘’underdressed’’. In her opinion, there is something a little provocative with the outfit. Ino laughed greatly at Sakura’s reaction saying not only that’s the theme BUT she must look her best to go along with the other bridesmaids (she met up with them because they had to organize many parts of the event). According to Ino’s words “Contrary to you Miss Big Forehead, the women of the Cloud (as the rumors/stereotypes say) are curvy/thick girls. NOT LIKE YOU MY ANGRY SALMON SAKURA”. She can’t let them outshine her for the sake of her pride (but don’t get it twisted Ino gets along with everyone, she has some other motives because she heard the members of Kumo’s national basketball team were going to be present at the event and if she could get it before settling down it was her last chance).
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Above, it’s the type of vibe the bridesmaids' team.
Sakura cringed more at her remark (insult) about her chest than whatever else was on her blonde friend's mind, she though how could her friend believe such foolish ideas. I mean Karui is almost shaped just like her, Shanaronnnn. The chest shaming must stop.
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As expected, Sai just goes along with the flow but is glad to attend the wedding. Sakura and Naruto keep a constant eye on him since going to a foreign nation, we are walking in a field of mine. If he could offend many Hyuugas at Naruto’s wedding (because what he said got misconstrued and he was way toooo blunt, a mix of both)
Sakura has a headache just thinking about it. this is NOT the place to say something offensive or out of place, no no no. She deeply talked about it to everyone behind Sai’s back who is the only one who lacks insight on many things especially the plans Ino have for the night. Better if he doesn’t know, thinks Naruto.
TEAM INO-SHIKA-CHO
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Shikamaru’s aching back and legs can’t wait for this whole mess to be over. When they announced that the groomsmen and bridesmaids had to put together a choreography he almost melted in place. While his sentiment towards dancing (hum meaning making himself the target for jokes from Naruto and Kiba for eternity) wasn’t the best and still rubs on him badly, he really wants the ceremony to go well and to make Chouji happy. So as absurd as it sounds, he put a lot of energy and interest into the preparation for the event more than what people would assume he does. He rehearsed with passion and stood the test by showing a high level of interest  (the boy even cried for Chouji countless times and will more in the future).
 Off course, he will go lay in a closet when the music will come, and people will start dancing and celebrating. He is pleased with how the event’s preparations look for now. He is deeply happy that Karui’s entourage is accepting and very loving towards Chouji.
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Honestly, Chouji is SUPER NERVOUS. He almost passed out many times during the preparation of the wedding. While him and Karui are fine together, the idea of many not being good enough to her entourage and family makes him shake deeply. A little bit like he thought he would never get married but time and effort proved him wrong.
On her side, Karui doesn’t worry about it as much as him. Since she will be moving permanently to Konoha after their wedding, she knows her friends took a double portion of adrenaline to make the most lit party in the ninja world on her special day.
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For the pre-wedding period, Ino almost quarantined her shinobi sisters to prepare for the event, she told EVERYONE to dress in some form of satin since it’s the theme. She went out of her way to provide dresses and fabrics from Kumo since their satin doesn’t stain when you sweat (for all that dancing I guess it’s breathable). She is the ‘’I’ll get your dress for you’’ type girl like a manager. Her family worked hard to make all the various flower arrangements, someone’s lack of fashion sense is not going to ruin this. She is so excited and can’t hide it. Honestly, she never really thought a day like this would ever come (especially in the way it did with Karui), so she can’t stop talking about the wedding and deeply disses anyone who wants to say anything negative about it.
TEAM 8
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Kiba (who is honestly not a ‘’foreigner friendly’’ type of person when it comes to Kumo at least) regardless of his bold demeanor was encouraged by the presence of the quality food Naruto talked about and the possibility of seeing beautiful chocolate/caramel women. I think the Rap/Hip Hop (music from Kumo) Naruto showed him and both enjoy went to his head.
Shino goes along in all respects even if he is stepping outside of his comfort zone, he has neither bad nor delusional expectations and just wants to have a good time.
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Has for the Hyuuga, this wedding is a very delicate situation. Due to what happened concerning Kumo and their clan (tried to kidnap Hinata and literally got Hizashi killed). So off course going to Kumo (for whatever reason) is not hot topic with the Hyuugas especially Hiashi who was against Hinata & Neji (yep, he alive too) attending the event. He had legit reasons not to want anyone of his clan to participate but an interesting turn of events took place.
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First Hanabi was completely against not attending the event. Her and Konohamaru planned on having a good ole funky time at the wedding like they did at Hinata & Naruto’s wedding regardless of being more formal (I guess). She is determined to find Konohamaru anything close or even a girlfriend since her last attempt at Hinata’s wedding failed miserably. Also, she thinks (like the rebel she is, according to Hiashi) that the favor must be returned, anyone involved can’t just move sky and earth for her sister’s wedding but then drop the ball or lack the same amount of enthusiasm for another shinobi’s engagement especially one we consider to be an ally or a friend. She is more than excited to go outside of the Land of Fire, it’s like a vacation Hanabi already has a sightseeing checklist and items to purchase before going home (apparently, they have great BBQ restaurants and amazing street food). So, no time to listen to Hiashi’s rants, she pressured Hinata to join her since she appears indecisive (as always) not wanting to offend her father but at the same wanting to go for the sake of her friends. Ino has been bombarding her ears for the past months about the wedding how it’s the greatest thing on earth EVEN BETTER THAN HER MARRIAGE (no shame smh).
TEAM GAI
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Neji doesn’t want to go and is 1000% against them going (especially Hinata). Not because of the situation with his father (the past is the past, and he has passed over the point of holding grudges at least in this department), it’s more because of … (cue rolling drums and a light Hyuuga superiority complex come on). Yes, you guess it… PREJUDICE (I’m not going to call Neij racist, that’s a big accusation I would say the biggest wing of the conservative bird). The people of Kumo and the whole Land of the Lightning give a bad taste in his mouth. It’s like meat to a vegetarian, it’s just No (no more, no less, just no).
He’s like Sasuke but colder and less open, at least Sasuke will secretly stay and endure to watch Naruto being the king of the dancefloor for his motives. When Neji saw how Hinata was being dragged to the event anyway by Ino, the other shinobi sisters, and Hanabi by force, he talked to her about it but Hinata finally made it clear that she was going out of respect (that’s the reason she gave him). He quickly changed his mind and FINALLY accepted the endless begging from Lee to join the event with his teammates.
‘’You’re so considerate, Neji! We are going to have a good time!!’’ screamed Lee.
Quietly Neji kept to himself but he had the self-appointed mission of watching Hinata’s back during the event. He firmly believes (based on what he heard and his own unrequested opinion) that many thirsty men are going to try to make moves on her married cousin again based on his assumptions.
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Tenten is on board with Neji and kind of doesn’t have a good impression of the ceremony regardless of what Ino repeats day and night. Killer Bee left a bitter taste in her mouth, but she still has a remnant of curiosity and doesn’t want to miss her chance to enjoy the event by leaving Lee by himself since she first taught Neji refused to come. Tenten has mixed feelings about the wedding because of her relationship with romance but excitement for the ceremony grew on her.
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On the side, LEE CAN’T WAIT. Weddings have a special place in his since it’s the perfect example of love (holding back his tears). Because they had to travel to get to the ceremony, he prepared his clothes and luggage months in advance (yes months, LEE BEEN READY). HE EXPECT NOTHING MORE THAN A GOOD TIME WITH GOOD PEOPLE.
SAND SIBLINGS
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TEMARI AND KANKURO JUST WANT TO SEE SHIKAMARU DANCE. NOTHING ELSE TO SAY.
Kankuro, really wants to measure the level of ‘’fancy-ness’’ of the event and he wants to make sure they take note so they can do better for what they have in store for Temari’s marriage. He’s in the front marching with Lee and Naruto full of enthusiasm.
The sensei are here for damage control which includes Asuma (still alive and going strong), Kakashi, Tenzo, Guy & Iruka. Someone bringout the whisky and the whole bottle of Tylenol for Kakashi’s aching back and officially 5th sleepless night.
NEXT PART
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oh-cramity-its-amity · 4 months ago
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You have a real niche taste in music
Ah- I don't know if I would call it niche per say but rather extremely refined and self curated. A lot of it amounts to me exploring and trying to constantly expand my knowledge on artists I might not know but have heard in passing. We are fortunate to exist in the age where something like Spotify exists and is widly accessible. A way that I look for artists is mainly through vinyl hauls on YouTube, I pull up Spotify in a different tab on my phone, and whenever an album looks even remotely intriguing or like it sounds of the genres I like, I add it to the library for later.
You gotta love an album a lot if your gonna spend money on a new vinyl; unfortunately the prices are godawful to buy multiple albums at one time but seeing someone talk about their vinyl collection and haul is something that I go to for recommendations. Album artwork is a good factor too! If it looks cool then why not, Spotify being so accessible makes the barrier of entry to consume an album almost without effort. If you listen to the album later and its not your jam then it too is a learning experience. Maybe that album didnt register for you at that time too, theres some albums I come back to months after a first listen that click and I enjoy. You gotta really have an open mind and not be afraid to discover something different thats out of your comfort realm. Its extremely fun for me, especially too when a friend or someone in passing mentions an album or song. Chances are even if I'm not engaging with you at the time and I see the post I'll pull my Spotify up and add it to my library. I'm always interested in figuring out what there is that's out there.
Obviously you dont ever have to approach music this way, if you are someone who only wants to listen to one or two artists then thats cool!!! Music is subjective and its something your supposed to enjoy as a whole. If it makes you feel good and happy then thats what matters.
Too- I find that sometimes an artist wont always click and sometimes its just the album itself. Not all artists have good albums, you dont need to consume all of an artist's catalog to "be a fan" you can just like one album by them. That's some of what I do. I try an album, like it, move on. But the trick is to try to figure out your favorite genres as well and find artists that fit within them or people who like those artists but also additional artists.
So- Examples of this is I like Phoebe Bridgers, yeah? Well this girl I watched mentioned Radiohead - Which is kind of not toward the same genres at all but you get the point. She liked Radiohead so I decided "Well maybe I should try to see what this album sounds like" and at first Radiohead was HARD to get into. Super slow for my taste, but a different youtuber said that In Rainbows was her favorite album, so I tried that one. And guess what? It clicked. I love In Rainbows. Then I went back to Ok Computer and it made sense. You just gotta approach it all with an open mind and not be afraid of trying something you might not like in the end, in every case its always a learning experience to help you refine your taste better!!! Also albums too sometimes need relistening for you to get a better feel for them. I can go on and on about music but I will leave it here. My taste is niche if you say it is anon, but I just know what I like lol
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tadpolesonalgae · 5 months ago
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helloooo, i hope this isnt weird at all.
u really inspired me to start writing one of the wips ive had cooking in my head for 10,000 years with CBMTHY (i love your interpretations of all the characters across everything youve written, even dark! versions of everyone).
but how do you get the thoughts in your head onto the page :( its a little demotivating to not be as good of a writer as I'd like. so im terrified constantly that the story isn't coming off correctly. it certainly doesn't help that I've been stewing on this fanfic concept since i initially read acotar and tog, (crossover shit woo!) but the scenes are so vivid in my imagination that everything i can actually type out seems to fall flat or seems jumbled with the amount i try to include.
like, i posted a part last night after having it ready to go for months (there are several more im hiding 😭) and have reread it 3 times and have to remind myself its fine and i dont need to delete it. but idk if im just being crazy tbh. Im also very much the same type of person who needs feedback in order to continue with creative projects. however the idea of even asking about it here is intimidating, especially after your stories helped push this lil amateur to write. But any help would be so greatly appreciated, especially becsuse theres no one ik personally who enjoys the series who would be willing to chat about it 😅
again, i hope its not weird that im not sending anything in directly related to ur work and asking for advice 😅😅 but i hope you have a good rest of ur day/ night !!
haha, don't worry about it! I'm not sure I'm the best person to offer advice on this since I'm just kind of writing what I want to write though, but I'll try and help.
What you mentioned about struggling to get thoughts down on the page - I think an element of it is probably feeling comfortable enough to put them down there in the first place? That and also having the words to know what you mean? Read around, listen to music, chat with people if you can and see if you can find stuff you resonate with and then pay attention to what it is and try to figure out why. And it can take a while to find the right words, so let yourself breathe.
Suddenly jumping into a project you've been hyping up in your mind won't come out pristine immediately, it might be a case of writing paragraphs once, then writing them out again beneath that but trying to improve on what you've already written with a thesaurus in hand. It might also be a case of listening to music that simulates the emotions you want to write out and then trying to articulate them in the moment. Also writing without thinking can help. Or writing exactly how you're thinking, I guess? It doesn't always work though, so I'd sincerely suggest trying to write some smaller things to start with or have on the side to help practice.
In terms of trying to find people to give feedback, I think interacting with other writers can help. I'm not the best person for this since I like being away from my computer/phone as much as possible, but chatting to writers off anon, or if your writing blog isn't your main one then switching to your writing blog to leave a comment or reblog and leaving notes in the tags is a really great way to show other people you're interested in acotar/tog and writing. If the idea of coming off anon to interact with writers is (like I find it) absolutely terrifying, you can always keep anon on but sign off using a specific pseudonym or emoji that will be recognisable! That way you can get used to chatting without entirely compromising your anonymity and hopefully become comfortable. Asking other people what they do to help them get their thoughts down too can help since you'll be more likely to find someone similar.
I'd also recommend that if your story is long to try planning it out roughly as chapters or bulletpoints so you don't have to store it all in your brain. Have playlists on hand or boards on Pinterest to look over.
I think it's great that you've posted a chapter though - if you have a project you want to do well it's so easy to get caught up in wanting it to be a good as possible that you never actually get around to posting it, so I think what you've done is a great start. If you're unhappy with it after a few months or so you can always edit, nothing's written in stone.
And if you want to write in again please feel free to! I promise it doesn't have to be about my writing and I would think other writers would feel the same. If you want to turn off anon that's fine, and if you want to use an emoji as a sign off that's cool too, you can work your way up to chatting more openly about the stuff you enjoy :)
Also, if anyone else thinks they have some good tips for writing, getting thoughts down, keeping up interest/motivation with a project please add them!
And anon if you want to send in a link to the first part of your story feel free to, or if you want to chat with me directly I'd be interested to have a peek at what you're writing? I love acotar but tog still has a special place in my heart so I'd love to read more content around it too. I know how scary it can be sharing stuff you've worked hard on :)
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authored-vanessa · 11 months ago
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“Why do you have to be such a freak!” Mom screamed.
I felt my eyes burn with shame, guilt, and total rejection.
“Go take off the eyeliner and put on some real clothes, now!”
For a moment I couldn’t even move. Then, I bolted up the stairs, tears flooding my vision and ruining my haphazard attempt at makeup. I somehow managed not to slam my door in my rush. I ripped and tore at my clothes desperate to escape them. Escape all this shame and guilt. I grabbed an oversized hoodie and jeans, then just kind of stood there. I had always known I wouldn’t be accepted but, it’s one thing to think it, and another entirely to feel it, to hear it, to be confronted with the reality. My head was spinning. I collapsed on the ground, and slept.
It was dark out when I woke. The faint fuzz of what would, horrifyingly, someday become a mustache was starting to grow back yet again. My whole body ached with the need to cry more, but no more tears would come. I was dehydrated beyond that. I caught sight of my alarm clock, 8:42pm. I stilled and listened, straining my ears like a deer who just heard a twig snap. The house was quiet, maybe they were gone?
I carefully pried open the door and moved stair by stair, my heart pounding so loudly I was certain the neighbors could hear it. When I made it to the bathroom, I locked the door and proceeded to wipe off all the makeup on my face, now a ruined smudge of blush, eyeliner, and caked foundation. My face was red and raw 15 minutes later, but maybe I could blend in again, go back to afternoons spent locked in my room playing at being her. The girl I shouldn’t ever want to be. It’s disgusting and perverse, right? I’m just a teenage boy going through a weird hormone phase. My friends are just better at hiding it that’s a—
“David, we’re home!”
My mom’s voice sent me into overdrive, suddenly the air was thinner and my heart was right back to thundering away. When I tried to reply, nothing came out at first. I held my breath. One. Two. Three. My mind stilled, she wasn’t yelling angrily. Not this time. I took another breath and held it for another triplet and this time I replied in my most gruff voice I could manage “I’m upstairs!”
It came out hoarse and fatigued. I left the bathroom and marched downstairs. I would apologize for being such a freak, let her and my siblings know it was just a phase and that I was done with being such a freak, a creep, a disgraceful deviant. Mom was placing bags on the counter and without turning to look at me just said “Go help your siblings bring the food in.”
So, I did. My guilt forcing my head down and my mouth shut. After getting settled again, Mom went to the living room and turned on the TV, I opened my laptop and logged back in to messenger. The usual family routine back in place.
dmon4763: How’d it go, gurl! I’m dying for the deets?
jesst_k1dngg: not great, i dont wanna talk about it
dmon4763: That great huh? Do you need a place to crash or?
jesst_k1dngg: ...
What could I even say!? Oh my parents just think I’m a freak? I’m just going to keep living a lie? Call me David again? I glanced at Mom hoping somehow she didn’t have the ability to see whatever was going on from the other side of the computer screen, impossible as it might’ve been.
jesst_k1dngg: i dont wanna talk about it, talk tomorrow?
dmon4763: Okay... just promise me you’ll actually be there tomorrow?
I closed my laptop without responding, walked out the door without saying a word to anyone. The cool, night air of spring instantly helped center me. I knew things were bad but I also could just keep doing what had been working for the last 16 years and everything would be fine. Sure, I’d keep feeling worse and worse, logically I knew that. But like anything, you could get used to it right? I longingly watched the cars on the highway, knowing that their destinations were anywhere far from here, far from this highway pit stop of a town where no one wanted anything too queer.
———
I recently finished reading Some Girls Do by Jennifer Dugan and it unlocked some of my own spark. Instead of hiding it away in my obsidian or a notebook though, I figured I’d post it and see if people like it. It’s definitely part of a larger story that is burning a hole inside of me so follow along if you want more, and if not, well I’m sure you’ll find a way to let me know. じゃあ、また今度ね!Until next time!
Authored: Vanessa
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mach1ne-g1rl · 2 years ago
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Saw your most recent post on dhmis and tma and I've got opinions to say I believe Computers is an Eye episode because Colin's whole deal is stealing personal info and being smart but its not my strongest I see Jobs as a buried because while it doesn't involve much claustrophobia its more about harmful workplaces and overworking which ties in with the buried in a symbolic sense. I will argue so strongly Death is an End episode. The End is LITERALLY the fear of death smh. While I can see the argument its a Stranger because of Stain Edwards the theme of death is so strong that it isn't that relevant. I see Family as both Stranger and Corruption, Stranger because the whole episode feels very uncanny with the design of the family and set being a "real" place. It's also Corruption because the episode is about toxic family relations. I still cannot believe how you thought Friendship was originally a Vast episode. While I can see why you would assign it Lonely it's clearly a Corruption, it's literally about toxic friendships. Also bugs. Tbh i don't know what to assign to Transport my closest guess is Vast but my argument isn't very strong Electricity is a hard one, I don't think i can assign it to one entity. I think Electracey is a Extinction avatar because she's a robot and the "everything in the home will be plugged in and part of the electric family" line. I could see Charged Yellow being either Eye, Stranger or Extinction. Eye because he's want to find the truth and also green eyes, Stranger because Yellow gets replaced, and Extinction because he gets replaced using specifically technology. The power outage is probably Dark because darkness. Lesley is a Web avatar, I will fight you on this. She's controlling them, she's the literal puppet master. You said that Lesley isn't the main one pulling the string making her less Web aligned but I would argue that makes her MORE web aligned because she's knows she's not fully in control. I interpret becoming a web avatar as not only being manipulative, but accepting your lack of free will. As Annabelle said in 147, "let it never be said that I do not dance the steps I am assigned." Sorry this is long and probably sounds a little rude i just have very strong opinions on tma and dhmis have a lovely day
COmputer being eye was also on my first post but i removed it bc i didnt think it was part of the big Fear factor ? but the way you phrased it does make it work
jobs being buried makes sense too !! my main reason for it being spiral is just Duck calling everything out and then Also going weird ? and then going back to "this is all wrong" very strongly (also the episode is reminiscent of Sculptor's Tool to me with only duck pointing out how this is Odd)
death SHOULD be end ur right , i just didnt think anyone in dhmis seemed very scared of the Death there ? so i thought it wasnt very important but Yeah when you mention it its definitely end ty (Or desolation bc it also feels like . theyre more focused on the grief of losing someone n not the Fear of Death ? if that makes sense=? but i dont rly get the End and Desolation anyway so)
CORRUPTION FOR FAMILY IS SO RIGHT i think i considered corruption for it at one point but i second guessed myself enough to remove it again . and stranger never reallly seemed correct to me but it was the closest and i had no one to discuss with so i ran with it:sob:
IM SORRYY LSITEN OK i hadnt listened to tma in full when i made the first list. i just read the entities wiki page and heard season 5 ..!!!! honestly idk if i agree with corruption bc , while thats probably the deeper meaning of the episode (toxic friends) warren always seemed like just an autistic asshole to me so i never saw the whole . toxic thing ? and he never really actually seemed friends with any of them ?? yea taking advantage of their kindness but i wouldnt call it a toxic relationship bc there never Was a Relationship to me (probably factually wrong n im being ignorant here but its my list and blehh :P im biased towards warren) and im probably just forgetting something bc i havent rewatched it in a while but are there bugs besides warren (are worms bugs)?
transport i assigned Web bc red guy being like . aware of the whole They're Trapped There thing and trying to escape and Lonely bc they're trying to get to other people/ civilization/ community but are just . stuck ? and in some episodes the lonely just takes ppl to endless places that they cant leave (cul-de-sac is the only one i remember) and it just (again) reminded me of that
ELECTRICITY /SHOULLD/ be more than 1 or 2 very true but i just Really hate assigning more than 2 to these idk why ive set that rule for myself but it just feels wrong, disorderly and i dont like it . but yes i can see electracey being extinction (tbh i feel like teachers being avatars/ assinging them patrons/fears could be a whole other list itself) Charged Yellow being stranger i disagree. yes hes replaced but it feels more like . if s1 jon got replaced by s5 jon ? does that make sense ? I HAD DARK For this episode too bc the power outage but it didnt feel like a big fear factor here ? and i just didnt think it was significant enough (the dumb self-imposed rule) Lesley IS web coded i completely forgot annabelle for a second when i made this :sob: ive had too much michael on my mind and i thought being trapped wasnt enough of a theme here ? not like it was in Transport or like Dreams but yea it definitely should be Web
IM GLAD this is long i like hearing other ppls thoughts and input on this silly stuff (it did sound a little rude at times but dw i get it) I think at the end of the day the way we judge these is just Very different? Unless you disagree, i dont think the web series is this "up for debate" as the tv show is bc it just has . Less. There's maybe 3 lines at the start, then the teacher comes in and starts singing about what they embody, then the horrors and the end (only the last 3 episodes rly made me question which Power would be associated with them bc it kinda follows a plot so they could all a little be taken as web and lonely with red guy?) Theres just so many more ways the TV show can be interpreted. These could be judged on the Teacher, the Lesson, the thing that scares the characters, the thing that scares the Audience, symbolism/manifestations, etc. (i think i just went with whatever seemed the most relevant to me / what scared the characters ? but i was also being pretty inconsistent there lmao) i feel like there would probably have to be multiple lists or just one BIG list of everything that could count as one of the entities ? or maybe im blowing this out of proportion and its really simple for you, and only i struggled with this :,) either way it was fun ! and i think thats all that matters maybe the real dhmis tma entities assigning list were the friends we made along the way aww
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taintedcigs · 11 months ago
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HELLO I AM BACK. AND SO IS MY COMPUTER BITCH. LEMME DIVE INNNNN.
The smile on his face that could never be directed at you, is directed at her. The love and the longing in his eyes that always lingers when she is around. She who had stolen his heart from the very first moment they saw each other. She who had always kept his heart even when she left him for the one she is smiling at now. She who will always be the one he will look at. 
HWAT THE FUCK ANDY. I JUST STARTED READING IT AND WE'RE ALREADY FUCKING UNDER ATTACK. DUDE.
Right. You’re here because of him. You don’t know why he feels the urge to drag you along to every group hang out. No one wants you around, you don’t even think that Robin wants you here, she barely talked to you since you came here. And the longer you sit in Steve’s living room, with an untouched can of coke on the table in front of you, surrounded by people who most likely cannot stand you or your presence, you wish more and more that Jason should have dragged you down with him.  STOP YOURE MAKING ME SO FUCKING SAD IM GONNA DIE.
You don’t belong here, you don’t belong anywhere.  BUT SHES SO GODDAMN RELATABLE OH MY GOD. I FEEL YOU BLONDIE. I SEE YOU BLONDIE. IAM YOU BLONDIE!!!!
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You fail to notice the disapproving look on Steve’s face, the way he tensely straightens up, slowly getting up as his brows knit together, more and more, watching in disbelief how you make your way over to Argyle.  OH MY GOD LITTLE ANGEL STEVIE IS SO WORRIED SHUT UP EVERYONE SHUT UP.
“She can’t smoke or drink! Her doctor said it loud and clear, and I warned you before!” He points at him. STOOOOOOOOPPPP. HE WARNED HIM BEFORE?!?! THIS LITTLE IN LUV IDIOT. HE JUST DOESNT KNOW IT YET!!!
“Wow, you do worry about me, Harrington. You weren’t lying.”  EVEN I FEEL GIDDY OVER HERE EVERYOEN SHUT UP GOD I LUV THEM SOSOMUCH!!!!
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“Sit your ass down, Blondie and drink your goddamn coke, don’t even think about weed or–” “No weed, no beer, just fucking coca cola, got it, mom,” you roll your eyes at him and slump back in your previous seat, crossing your arms over your chest. LMAOOO THEY R MAKING ME CRY. ALSO AT LEAST SHE CAN HAVE COKE.
“Goddamn brat,” he mumbles under his breath. ���I heard that.”  “Good,” he snaps at you. OH FUCKING HELL NOW I NEED HIM TO SAY THIS IN VERY VERY DIFFERENT CONTEXTS. FUCK FUCK FUCK.
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Sometimes you feel like a creep, watching him and adoring everything about him, from his sun kissed skin, to his beautiful eyes, to his perfect hair, to that one smile that he blesses only those around him that he cares about – something that you will never get. GIRL I DONT THINK YOU'RE A CREEP I'D GAWK AT STEVE TOO. but that last fucking line?!?? we're back to sad again JFCCC HELPME.
“Keep your pity to yourself, Blondie. I’d rather never see you again than see you when I don’t have to.” okay im just gonna kms EVERYONE ABORT.
“Listen uh, that was mean,” he starts, now struggling to look into your eyes. He squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, tugging at his hair. “I shouldn’t have said that.” UHUHHHHHHH IM GONNA FREAKING CRY.
“Bye, Steve.” GOODBYE NOW I WILL CRY. You turn the other way, towards Hawkins cemetery. and noW IWILL CRY EVEN MORE.
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OH FUCK ANDY THIS CHAPTER WAS SOOO GOOD. I LOVE THE WAY U WRITE THEIR DIALOGUE. HOW FAST IT SWITCHES FROM FLIRTY, ANNOYANCE, FULL MEANNES AND JUST FUCKING GUT-WRENCHINGLY SAD.
BEAUTIFULLY WRITTEN AS AL-FUCKING-WAYS. I CANNOT WAIT FOR MORE ILYYY <3
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Dancing with our hands tied | S.H.
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Chapter two ⭐︎ I want you to notice, when I'm not around
Warnings: angst! mean!Steve, unrequited feelings, one sided feelings, mentions of Steve being in love with Nancy, mentions of death, allusions to suicidal thoughts, mentions of weed and alcohol
Pairing: Steve Harrington x fem!reader
Word count: 4k
Author's note: I promise, it's gonna get so much better soon, get ready for some much more angst in the next chapter, it's gonna hurt. @hellfire--cult thank you for helping me as always, you're the bestest!!!
Series Masterlist ⭐︎ Previous Chapter ⭐︎ Next chapter
The living room is crowded, at least it seems that way to you. You aren’t used to being around so many people. You didn’t want to come here, but you had no choice when both Eddie and Robin had showed up at your house earlier today and practically forced you out of the house.
Now you sit here, sinking deeper and deeper into Steve Harrington’s couch, feeling uncomfortable and out of place. You’re playing with the loose string on the hem of your shirt as you look around the room. Robin is snacking on the m&m’s Eddie had brought as she’s looking through the pictures Jonathan had taken of her and Nancy just now. Eddie is out on the patio, smoking a cigarette and talking to Argyle who will leave for California in two days. Jonathan is staring at the screen watching some music video that is playing on the MTV channel, his pupils are blown and his eyes seem heavy, he is high out of his mind and for once, Nancy doesn’t seem to care, with her legs thrown over his thigh, she’s sipping on the beer that Steve handed to her a few minutes back, she is talking to Robin, unaware of the set of eyes on her. 
You restrain the eye roll as you look at him. 
Steve is sitting on the same couch you do, though with a big distance, you sit at one end and he on the other, far far away from you. You know he doesn’t want you here, you saw the look on his face when Eddie had dragged you into his house, a wave of something had washed over his face, something unpleasant, like he wanted to scrunch his face up in disgust at the sight of you – his mind had already erased your little moment at the Sinclair house, last week. Now you are back to normal. He made a comment, you made a comment and now you both sit there, avoiding each other like the plague. 
Secretly, you watch him though. 
Like you always do. 
And what you are seeing now, only fuels your annoyance and your wish to go home. 
The smile on his face that could never be directed at you, is directed at her. The love and the longing in his eyes that always lingers when she is around. She who had stolen his heart from the very first moment they saw each other. She who had always kept his heart even when she left him for the one she is smiling at now. She who will always be the one he will look at. 
You thought that he was over it, you thought that he was over her. But you were a little blind and maybe he was too when he told Robin that he was over her. He never was, he never will be. You saw the way he looked at her when she patched him up after he was attacked. You saw the way he looked at her in the RV. You heard the things he said to her, how he talked about his dreams that he surely saw her in by his side. 
You also heard the things he said about you when he thought that you were sleeping. You still remember how gut wrenching it felt to hear him say things about you to his ex-girlfriend. 
You huff in silence when his lips curl into a smile and his eyes light up when Nancy throws her head back in laughter. 
God, why are you even here? 
Eddie falls into the seat next to you, throwing his arm around your shoulder. It feels as though a cloud of smoke had followed him because suddenly, the smell of snacks, fresh air and beer is replaced by it, along with the smell of his cologne.
Right. You’re here because of him. You don’t know why he feels the urge to drag you along to every group hang out. No one wants you around, you don’t even think that Robin wants you here, she barely talked to you since you came here. And the longer you sit in Steve’s living room, with an untouched can of coke on the table in front of you, surrounded by people who most likely cannot stand you or your presence, you wish more and more that Jason should have dragged you down with him. 
You don’t belong here, you don’t belong anywhere. 
Eddie takes a look around before he turns to you, the smile still lingering, though turning into a softer one when he notices the frown on your face. 
“What’s wrong, sweets?” 
You shake your head a little, trying to give him a smile, “nothing.” 
“Are you feeling okay?” He asks, whispering. 
You wonder if that is the reason why he always wants you around, so he can keep checking up on you, so he can make sure that you are okay, that you are still alive and not lying in some ditch after pushing yourself a little too hard while still recovering from surgery. 
Does he care so much because he knows that no one else would? 
Or does he feel like he owes you something because you helped him when it wasn’t even asked of you? 
You nod, “yeah, I just don’t know why I’m here,” you whisper to him, subtly gesturing to this tight friend group that you don’t fit into. 
Eddie is new to this as well, but unlike you, he’s open and friendly with everyone. He surely isn’t as cheerful as he was weeks back. Just like you, he is still recovering, hiding his inner scars from the face of the earth but still, he is trying. Trying to fit into this, and for him, it’s working, for you? Not so much. 
“Well, you’re here because of me,” he grins, tapping your shoulder. 
You huff but smile, looking down at your hands. 
Yeah, you wouldn’t be here otherwise. 
Had you not gone on a walk that one afternoon a few weeks back, you would have never ran into him. Eddie who had been a wanted man at that time, Eddie who was hiding at skull rock, in drenched clothes and with clattering teeth as he shivered like crazy. You remember how scared he looked when you saw him, how he thought that you would rat him out because at that time, you were nothing but acquaintances to each other. – You bought from him a few times but that was all. He always tried to make small talk, throw a few jokes at you, but at that time, he barely got you to laugh. 
You didn’t believe the rumors on the news, not even for a second, not even when Chrissy used to be a close friend of yours. 
You decided to help him, not knowing what else you were getting yourself into, not knowing that it wasn’t just him involved in a world you hadn’t known of yet, at that time. You got him dry clothes, food and the walkie talkie he had begged you for. 
You never expected Steve Harrington and Dustin Henderson to show up moments later, though. And least of all, you hadn’t expected Max there. It felt like a surreal dream the moment they started explaining everything to you. The moment you found out the truth about Starcourt, about all the deaths in this town, about the lab, about Henry. 
You had only been allowed to be a part of it because of Max, because of your friendship with the girl you had grown protective of, because she let you help. 
The night in the upside down, the night at the Creel house led you here, into this friend group, into Steve’s house where you certainly don’t belong. 
You don’t know what that nagging yet empty feeling in your chest is, if it’s the trauma that is slowly catching up to you or if it’s from watching him watch her, or if you’re just simply having a bad day but it’s making you feel sick and restless, you want the ground to swallow you up. 
You muster up your greatest smile and flash it at Eddie, “yeah, cause you’re my very best friend.”
He snorts at you, hearing the sarcasm in your voice. 
“Your only best friend is Red.” 
You smile at his nickname for Max. 
“Hey Chica, do you wanna smoke this with me?” 
You don’t even pay attention or look up, not until Eddie chuckles and nudges your shoulder, raising his eyebrows at you to look up and when you do, you find Argyle looking at you with a dopey smile on his face as he holds up a blunt to you. 
Without thinking, you get up with a smile on your lips, “is that even a question?” 
It’s been a long time since you have had anything other than medication in your system, you are in dire need of something that will ease your mind and make you feel more than what you are feeling today. 
You fail to notice the disapproving look on Steve’s face, the way he tensely straightens up, slowly getting up as his brows knit together, more and more, watching in disbelief how you make your way over to Argyle. 
“What the hell, Blondie!?” 
His raised voice startles everyone in the room. Robin looks up from the polaroids in her hands, glancing up at her best friend who is staring at you with angry eyes. Nancy and Jonathan turn to look at Steve before they turn to look at what he is glaring at – or who he is glaring at. 
Argyle and Eddie turn to Steve with confusion on their faces. 
And you, you halt in your tracks, and turn back slowly. Caught off guard by the intense look on his face, you freeze. 
“Are you crazy?” 
You open your mouth to speak, though you shut your mouth again when you realize that these words aren’t directed at you, they’re directed at Argyle. 
“She can’t smoke or drink! Her doctor said it loud and clear, and I warned you before!” He points at him. 
You’re taken aback by his anger, by his words. The fact that he remembered when even you, yourself have forgotten about it. You hate the way your heart flutters at that, you hate the way it makes your stomach feel all tingly. You know that it doesn’t mean anything, just because he remembered. 
You see the way Argyle’s face drops and the way he smacks himself on his forehead, “I forgot, I’m sorry, man,” he looks at you, pulling away the blunt he was just about to give to you. “Sorry, he told me… I wasn’t thinking.” He whispers, a little uncomfortably as a funny look takes over his face. 
Steve warned him? 
“Dude, I forgot too, don’t worry about it,” you pat his arm, giving him an apologetic smile. “Don’t mind mother hen over there, he’s overreacting as always.” You say as though you don’t feel your heart racing over Steve’s outburst. 
“And you.” 
You instantly turn to face him, just like everyone else in the room who watches the scene unfold with curiosity and confusion on their faces. 
You meet his hazel eyes, the ones that are still raging. 
“Stop being so fucking careless!” He snaps, pointing his finger at you now. “You’re getting on my goddamn nerves.” 
He places his hands back on his hips, huffing loudly. 
Your cheeks flush under his gaze, you can feel them burning, your heart beating faster and faster. You don’t know how to feel but all you can think about now is the look in his eyes when he realized that he hurt you back at Lucas’s place the other day, the words he had said to you. 
Despite the giddiness inside of you, you hide your feelings behind a smirk. 
“Wow, you do worry about me, Harrington. You weren’t lying.” 
He squints his eyes at you, nodding at your words with another huff. He pinches the bridge of his nose, shaking his head. 
Everyone is looking between the two of you, waiting for the bickering to start, the way it always does, but Steve manages to bite his tongue. 
And you surprise the others by holding back your little remarks. 
“And fucking relax, leave Argyle alone, he isn’t responsible for me and neither are you, Lego head. Go and get high, you need to calm down.” 
Jonathan snorts at the nickname, he throws his head back, chuckling loudly as he mumbles ‘Lego head’. Argyle, who already had one too many drags of the blunt he passed around before, is barely holding himself together, threatening to burst into laughter too. 
Steve shoots Jonathan a glare, pointing at him to shut up. 
Nancy looks down, pressing her lips together with an amused look in her eyes. 
Eddie drinks his beer, hiding the smirk behind the can, scratching the back of his neck. 
“Sit your ass down, Blondie and drink your goddamn coke, don’t even think about weed or–”
“No weed, no beer, just fucking coca cola, got it, mom,” you roll your eyes at him and slump back in your previous seat, crossing your arms over your chest. 
He sighs loudly, sitting back down as well, he crosses his legs, giving you the side eye. 
“Goddamn brat,” he mumbles under his breath. 
“I heard that.” 
“Good,” he snaps at you. 
There is no tension in the room, not even awkwardness after this weird moment. If anything, everyone is still amused. 
“Always bickering like an old married couple,” Eddie snickers. 
Steve glares at him, and you, you would have dug your elbow into his side, but he is wounded and still healing. The band aids on his neck are the evidence that they are still bad. He is hiding him, and you wonder if he always will, you ask yourself if he will hide his pain the way you hide yours. 
You don’t even notice that Robin left the room, only when everyone moves on from what just happened and chatter fills the space again, do you take a look around. You furrow your brows when you find her spot empty. 
Argyle and Jonathan leave the room, stepping out into the garden with Nancy following close behind. 
“Are you still in for tomorrow?” You hear Eddie, directing his question at Steve. 
“Yeah, sure.”
You don’t bother to ask and find out what their plans are. 
Robin walks back into her room, with something in her hand. Her eyes are aimed at you, a smile on her lips when she walks towards you. She hands you a drink, a diet pepsi. 
“Here.” 
Your lips part as you stare at the can for a long moment, blinking. You tilt your chin up, looking up at her with big eyes. 
Her smile falls and a frown takes over, “shit, I thought you liked diet pepsi? Was it original?” 
You shake your head at her, taking the can from her hand, “n-no, it’s diet pepsi.” 
She paid attention to you. 
She smiles at you. 
She felt bad watching you sit there and being unable to drink beer or smoke weed with the others. And she remembers that you always asked for pepsi when you were still in the hospital, you hated the teas there and despised the fact that you were only allowed water. 
“I thought you liked coke, Blondie.”
Robin rolls her eyes at Steve. 
“It’s not my favorite,” you shrug, turning to look at him. “I prefer pepsi.” 
He squints his eyes at you, “so when you stole my coke the other day, you did it just to–”
“Get back at you, yeah. Cause you stole my coffee.” 
“When did he steal your coffee?” Robin asks. 
“When I came to family video to rent a movie–”
“Oh, you little liar,” Steve scoffs at you, “she did not rent a movie, she didn’t even come to look for one.”
A smirk tugs at your lips, if there’s something that you love more than the drink in your hand, it’s to get on his nerves. 
“Says who? I really wanted one but the customer service sucks when this one isn’t around,” you point at Robin. 
Eddie chuckles, turning to look at Steve who is glaring at you, before a smirk appears on his face, his hazel eyes twinkling with smugness. 
“You and I both know that you didn’t want to rent a movie, honey. You were there because you wanted to see me,” he says, cockily as he lets his eyes move from your face, down to your body and back up to meet your eyes. 
Your breath gets caught in your throat at the way he just looked at you. You don’t squirm in your seat, but you surely would if the others weren’t around. You grow flustered beneath his stare but you have come to learn how to hide it – Steve Harrington will never see you blushing over him. 
Maybe he was right, maybe you did just want to see him, because you always do, you always want to see him. No matter how much he hates you, no matter how much he despises you, you can’t help but want him, even if you continue to lie about it to yourself to stay sane. 
Steve Harrington had always been your demise – from the first glance. 
You couldn’t help but grow fascinated with him, watching him from afar with eyes the shape of your favorite sunglasses. You couldn’t help but care for him, even when he couldn’t stand you. 
Sometimes you feel like a creep, watching him and adoring everything about him, from his sun kissed skin, to his beautiful eyes, to his perfect hair, to that one smile that he blesses only those around him that he cares about – something that you will never get. 
Sometimes it’s hard to look into his eyes because every time you do look for a little too long, you feel like dying because suddenly, you see the world with different eyes, you see something beautiful, because he is in it and when you look away, when he is gone, it feels anything but.
Steve wouldn’t even bat an eye if you were gone. He wouldn’t even notice if you weren’t around. 
Suddenly, you feel overwhelmed by the way he looks at you, by his presence, by all of this. You are in his space, you are invading, his home, his friend group, his safe place. The reminder of it, that you don’t belong here, lies heavy on your heart and you feel the urge to run away but you cannot give yourself away so easily, knowing that it would be awfully noticeable if you suddenly left after what he just said. 
So you put on a mask, the way you always do. 
“If that helps you sleep at night,” you smirk, tilting your head at him, “I mean no one else would come to see you, I took pity on you.” 
He clenches his jaw, his smirk falling into a frown. 
“Keep your pity to yourself, Blondie. I’d rather never see you again than see you when I don’t have to.”
You know how he feels about you, you know what he thinks of you, yet every single insult, every jab at you feels like a punch to your gut. But this, this was a punch to your heart. 
You know he wouldn’t grieve you if you died at the Creel house, but to know that he might have felt relieved to never having to see you again, hurts you more than you want to admit. 
“What the hell, man?” Eddie snaps at him as his brown eyes fill with anger at his words. 
Robin rolls her eyes, shaking her head at Steve in disappointment. 
But he keeps his eyes on you, struggling to read you, struggling to look past that smirk that is still going strong. 
“Well, I’ll put you out of your misery, Lego head,” you say as you place the drink on the table before you get up. 
Robin furrows her brows, looking you up and down, “what are you doing?” 
“I’m leaving.” You try not to sound bitter or hurt. “I’m getting tired and I forgot my meds at home.” 
Steve looks away from you, feeling a rush of guilt. 
“I’ll drive you–”
You cut Eddie off, shaking your head at him, “no, I’m gonna walk, I need some fresh air.”
Eddie looks at you worriedly, “sweets, I don’t want you to walk by yourself.”
“Eddie, I’m okay, I don’t get dizzy anymore,” you say, trying to smile at him. “I promise, I’ll call you later tonight.” 
He still looks unsure, not wanting to let you go like this. 
But he can tell that you want to be alone, right now, so despite his worry, he leans back again and nods begrudgingly. 
“Okay..” 
You walk out of the room, biting back the bitterness on your tongue, trying to swallow down the pain. You rush through the hallway and open the door, you only manage to take one step out before you hear footsteps behind you. 
You roll your eyes, knowing that Eddie being the stubborn guy that he is will try to convince you to stay, but when you turn around, it’s not Eddie’s brown eyes that you find yourself looking into, it’s Steve’s and it catches you off guard a little. 
He stops in front of you, his eyes scan your face and he huffs a little when he runs his fingers through his hair. 
If you didn’t know better, you’d think it’s guilt and worry in his eyes. 
You hold onto the door, ready to escape whatever pain he will put you through again.
“Listen uh, that was mean,” he starts, now struggling to look into your eyes. He squeezes his eyes shut for a moment, tugging at his hair. “I shouldn’t have said that.” 
You blink.
You swallow as you keep on looking at him with smugness, to hide the pain. 
“It’s okay, no need to hide the truth from me, you were just saying what you were feeling, right?” 
He opens his eyes and when he faces you again, he looks at you, really looks at you. He tries to find a hint of pain in your features or hurt in your eyes, but there is nothing. All he can see is the coldness in them. 
Nothing he could ever do or say would hurt you – at least, that is what he believes, what he always believed. 
“Right.” 
You bite the insides of your cheeks. 
“Good,” you nod and you tear your eyes away from him, unable to look at him any longer as you feel your heart cracking more and more.
“Y-You don’t have to go, Blondie.” He stops you once again, holding himself back from taking your hand. 
You slowly turn around and he still struggles to read you, even when you stop smirking, even when you only look at him with a straight face, not saying anything back. 
“But if you want to leave, no one’s gonna stop you.”
You see the indifference in his eyes, the coldness that is only there when he looks at you. 
Yeah, you know no one would. 
How can you care so much about someone that cares so little about you? 
How can you want him so bad when all he wants for you is to disappear? 
How can he worry one second and hate you in the other? 
How can you long for him after every hurtful thing that he said to you? 
You take a step away from him, blinking as you feel your eyes starting to burn. 
“Bye, Steve.” 
You turn around before he can even open his mouth, and you slam the door shut behind you because you don’t want to hear his voice. 
You walk away with tears in your eyes. 
You wish you didn’t come here today, every moment spent with him makes you want him even more, makes you hate yourself even more. 
You don’t go home, no, you can’t stand to be in a house that resembles nothing but loss. 
You turn the other way, towards Hawkins cemetery. 
You just need to vent. 
Even if only into the void. 
tagging only friends & mutuals
@prettyboyeddiemunson @mysticmunson @wroteclassicaly @livosssblog
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futilechildhooddream · 2 months ago
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looking up reasons why someone might miss an ex and I think it might be this one: you’re upset they moved on first. it’s not that I miss them in a romantic way or feel particularly lonely, its more a small sort of grief for the person they used to be before the messy person they turned into when they cut me off. they always had this darkness, and they hurt me in so many ways, and yet a lot of it comes down to that we were kids in love who hadn’t been shown a healthy way to be. we ended our after-dating friendship on that toxic note, or at least they did, but I guess i’m wondering now if I really grieved the truth of everything that happened. they were so bright and dark. I was so innocent and condemning. I think I also grieve the person I was as i’m becoming a person again. I dont want to be that way, but I dont know any way out. maybe I miss them because i’m trying to find me. what does it mean to be kind in a world of judgement? what does it mean to reach out, to be genuine? what does it mean to turn that kind acceptance towards myself? was what I experienced really that bad? i’ve been handed so many things in life and I have lived a life of privilege in many ways. and I have struggled. I worry im doing this to myself and really i’m to blame. but im not to blame for when they didnt listen. im not to blame for when they tried to hurt me. I dont hold anger against them, either. maybe I should. people, including them, were always disappointed at my sad resignation. they wanted me to get angry. how can I when I see the roads that led them there? I see how everyone is right in their own minds. I see how experiences build someone and how morality becomes contextual. I see even in the horrors how we’re all just trying to survive. but that doesnt excuse the hurt inflicted, it can’t. so what then? was it really that bad, and if the answer’s no can I live with my reaction? does it matter the objectivity of badness when my experience was betrayal, emptiness, and pain? what does it all mean if I am the cause of my own suffering? my neurons running the same race for so long. i’m not a computer to be reprogrammed, i’m a human being. what does that even mean? if there’s a truth to this universe, do I have to find it? do I have to have the answers? can I just be? maybe others can, maybe maybe maybe, but can I? I’m used to walking the line between two sides. how can I have faith when its choked in hate? was the relationship bad or good? why is the first in so long i’ve been able to just write. why, why, why.
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trolagygirl2022 · 7 months ago
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please I cant count how much 2 baddies and 1 porsche makes me cringe in fact any song that mention brand name or car name, just gives me the ick it seem kinda childish or overdone. even lisa song I think shes more good at fashion and conceptual based imagery than coming up with actual flow. flower is more my fave song in comparison bc i can listen to the whole song of jisoos with ease so its more pleasant for my ears to take
money for exampke was harsh to listen to except for that one segment that i think is the viral part of the song "my money moves" and so on was my fave bit. so in a way i do get why songs go viral for just that one part however i wish i could like the whole song rather than just one aspect of it and songs a getting too short for me to fully get into it. sometimes i also find skz music quite harsh on my sensitive ears. i want to love them as a group and i think theyre so funny and adorable / talented to watch as a whole but their songs just dont hit my vibes at all, currently ateez are my main loves but even their songs dont always hit and i think its more so the production (sorry joong i just dont like autotuned vocals in songs ok it only works for some instances not all of them. also im still waiting for more san solo stuff)
my problem with kpop as a whole is generally groups are getting too young thus so is their songs and its genuinely hard for me to find actual need to hard core stan a group if theyre like teens to early 20s bc i have such a huge age gap from them, come on kpop dont be like stale bread... and as older or same age groups go into military i kind of have to find someone else to follow in the mean time or i tend to find im prefering older music than current modern i guess tiktok related music.
my qualm with general music today compared to older music is i think i like how organic older music is or was in comparison, it was more naturally made than a computer made song not that they arent talented at what they do it just doesnt always vibe with me or sometimes the lyrics can be really off when u try to read them in english yet at the same time i get why these songs go viral but its not for the simple pleasures of listening to a good quality song. i think kpop when it sees what someone else is doing is popular someone else tries to replicate it instead of bringing something new or fresh in i actually think its terrified of being too individual and not standing out or not being viral
its kinda why ateez caught my attention and the mfs did just that (if only they had been an older age group sighhhhhhhhhhh) i love their concepts and overall talents oml theyre such an endless group with not having too many members (sorry nct but i forget ur names after the first 5 members ok) like theres often bits of songs i will skip but then i feel bad for not liking the entire song or thinking what i wouldve done or added differently to make it sound a better song or what english word i wouldve switched and so on just so it would rhyme better maybe thats what kpop lacks i like that it includes some random english lyrics but it often make no real sense to me
not like how id feel if i listened to green day or another familiar song where i already get the gist of the lyrics that have slightly better flow than some korean songs theyre not all bad its just not often as hit of a song as they might think it is if thst makes sense? sometimes it do be just the name or face of idol that make the song more relevant than what it deserves peekaboo is good example of nice flow and high note mix so is some of nct earlier songs or even jopping is catchy song as a whole its more listenable than their latest.
sorry for rambling hehe.
Idk but I LOVED money, I think it's better than Lalisa. Yeah I know it's not the best lyrically but it's too catchy, plus the dance is so fun! But yeah, I agree with you a lot. I like SKZ as a group but some of their songs are a bit too much for me. My favorite songs would be Domino, LALALA and Miroh. I think that their older work was better than what they're pumping out. (Sorry but their album with 5 Star was not it 😵‍💫 it was too obnoxious to my taste). Sure LALALA can be found obnoxious but idk, I think it's at a minimum, plus the instrumental is so freaking good! Yes I love ATEEZ!! I think they are a good example of more "unusual" songs that keep it to a minimum. The system is becoming like McDonald's, cheap stuff that don't leave you feeling the best after and takes your money (that's why Wendy's is better 😛). The NCT part is so true 😭 I usually listen to their songs if there is a part that's catchy but the rest of the song can be... well!
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live-love-laugh-lesbian · 11 months ago
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hi hi hii sorry ive been a bit busy but i love talking to you <33
ooh gift giving day is coming closerrr i lowkey hope you like yours ajsjfjdjc
fun fact: i listened to story of us for the first time today?!??? i know im crazy ajdjejsjd such a fan i am
alsoo while we are on the topic of my little pony ajdjrjs whats your favourite character?
herbal tea is soo good and chamomile tea after a hard dayy soo reall unfortunately i cant function properly without coffee so i prefer coffee ajdjfjsjf but tea is definitely more calming and probably more healthy for me lmao
see, i would pick master any instrument bc im not a sporty person andjdjs im more into music been learning it since i was 6 and i own an acoustic guitar which i would love to be able to play barre chords on but tbf the main instrument id like to master is ELECTRIC GUITARSSSS omg im obsessed w electric guitars theyre absolutely loml any character that plays them will forever be my favourite character electric guitars are SO HOT sorry im very passionate abt them i would love to be able to play some sick riffs on an electric guitar (also they just overall look so cool omg akdkejsjd) ive always wanted to learn electric guitar since i was a kid or like a bass 😍😍
anywayss amdjeksjd what would you pick? and my question for you: if you could pursue 3 careers what would they be? (if you dont mind sharing) alsoo cats or dogs? and sky blue or baby pink?
-swiftie spring exchange anon
Hello again! Is ok, no need to apologise! I'm enjoying talking to you as well! (Also low key shocked you only just heard that song the other day?? I swear it was everywhere at one point XD)
I'm sure I will like mine!! I am stressing over if my person will like theirs tho XD
My favourite MLP character is Rainbow Dash, but I'm a fan of Applejack too. I like the dynamics Applejack has with everyone, whilst with Rainbow Dash I think she's just super cool. How can I not love a rainbow pegasus??
Pfft sometimes coffee confuses me because everyone I know who drinks it seems to drink it for the caffeine...do people actually like coffee itself, or is it the caffeine? I'm mostly joking but also very confused XD And ooh...honestly electric guitars are very cool. I don't know why but they're just always associated with cool for whatever reason?? Electric instruments fascinate me however. Like what we make electric vs what we don't...imagine an electric violin. Or a flute. A recorder XD Idk but basically I can see why you'd pick that!! It's really cool you can do the guitar! I am terrible with music (I tried to learn the violin as a kid...I broke part of it on the very first day, panicked, and tried to fix it with superglue. It...sorta worked, enough so that I managed to just keep quiet about it until I turned 18 and was well away from consequences regarding breaking it lol.)
I think personally I'd like to go sports, but opportunities are low where I am, so it feels a bit wasted :( So maybe music? Ideally sports, especially anything that lets me go super fast. ALSO I want to be able to swim. And currently I uh cannot. And keep failing at trying to learn. Oh well.
Okay so 3 careers...I feel like I'm gonna be a bit vague here. First is my ideal career of "something that helps children with special educational needs". Whether that's like, support in schools, or making sure schools provide the right support, idk. Second...probably something medical? When I was younger I had wanted to study medicine at uni. I did not in the end but yeah! Helping out in the medical industry would be fun. And third...an animator! I've not got the patience for it tho XD What about you??
And cats!! I have two, one of which is sleeping beside the computer and the other is currently climbing over the keyboard and trying to sit on my arms. She is very helpful (sarcasm) but I love her so she gets away with everything XD You? And unsure on the pink vs blue...probably blue? In general I prefer warm colours to cool colours, but if I look around I have more blue things than pink things so maybe blue is the exception?
And last but not least, my question to you: of the four elements, air, water, fire and earth, which would you most like to be able to control?
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smileymoth · 1 year ago
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No i hate actually how much my dad has shaped me into a person and how i interact with things. I hate that i'm just like him sometimes and i express my feelings in the exact same dysfunctional way sometimes. That i lash out in anger sometimes. That i hate when people do things the "wrong" way. I hate that i had to fear him every weekend when he came home because what if the rooms werent clean enough and he would yell or be mad. I hate that i had to walk around eggshells around him when he was in a bad mood so he wouldnt yell at me, and i hate it more that it still fucks me up to the point that i run away when someone is upset bc im afraid of them. I hate that i would have such horrid anxiety abt him coming home on the weekends or staying at home for longer that i wished he hadn't come in the first place. I hated so much how he would twist my moms words, and read through all her messages and browse through all her history and shit on her and me for how long we both spent on the computer so i learned to delete history to get away with more computer time. I hate how one time he slapped me so hard on the thigh that it left a bruise but he denied it later so i have no fucking clue if it actually happened because hes never been physical w me and my mom but i remember it so vividly. It was 1 time and never again and in 3rd(?) Grade and i still remember it every now and then. I dont like it that i hated being at home because 80% of the time they were fucking arguing with my mom in the kitchen over something HE made up because HE was jealous of my mom or didnt like sth that my mom did bc HE didnt like it. He caused her so much grief and she had to put up with it and i followed suit because i wanted him to like me so i was nasty to my mom to please him. I had to listen to him rant abt mom and just nod along because i didnt know what to say. And then he started getting better and he wasnt so argumentative anymore so me and my mom were like omg hes changing. And then he fucking died. And i had to watch him die at the hospital while repeating to myself he will be fine becwuse hes a big strong man who has never been sick so he MUST survive, all while doing homework for logo class. And i woke up on tje morning of the 28th dec at 5am with the thought that my dad is probably dead. I brushed it off like haha im just anxious and went to sleep again. He died at 4am. I knew, i felt it.
And now i miss him so often because he was just misguided and didnt know how to deal with his emotions properly. But he still hurt me so bad and my mom even more from what shes told me. And i dont hate him at all even though i would be so scared of him id be nauseous and id cry before he came home bc i was so scared he woild be mad at me. i love him so much but i see him in my dreams so often and hes always so mean and rude in them and it sucks because i miss his hugs and i want him to hug me again and make jokes with me till im crying and i want to wake up on a saturday and go to tje kitchen to see him watching a russian youtube video about construction or "тор 10 момент" compilations while he eats his megapacked mayo grill sandwich and then he turns the water to boil so i could have tea. I want my dad to calm me down again because he was the only person who could do it at times. I want to be like hey dad im struggling with schoolwork can i just sit next to you and brainstorm out loud until i come up with something and yiu can help me think. Hey dad look im knitting a sock hahah yeah i know im crazy for that haha yeah. I miss him but i dont miss tjat he was so awful all tje time. Why couldnt he just be normal why did he have to be a controlling little freak who wanted everyone to do just as he wanted it to happen. And now wjenever sth happens i always find a way to connect it to my dad without wanting to. I hate it. I dont want to think of him as much because all my thoughts about him are so confusing and complex because of the person he was and it makes me feel worse and more confused and yet also nothing. Im happy my dad is dead because my mom is in a much happier relationship right now and i no longer fear coming home because What If hes in a Bad Mood and therfor walking too loud will make him yell. And then he will claim he didnt. While he clearly did
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