#listen I’ve been seeing space Starbucks

[foxmybeloved]

Me 🤝🏽 Commander Fox

Going to Space Dutch Bros

[hollywoodxwhore]

Ours | Chapter 14

Colson x Presley (Original Female Character)

Synopsis: Presley and Colson fell in love accidentally, but they were meant to be. Now that all the obstacles have been removed, they're moving in together in LA. Now, they have all the time in the world for Colson to teach Presley all of the things he knows. This fic is the sequel to Mine, which can be found in my masterlist!

Warnings/Content: angst is sticking around for a bit. big emotions, Presley finding out about Col, swearing, mentions of suicide attempts

This chapter is a little less intense, but it's still heavy. Please take care of yourself and skip if you need to.

Presley

I’m not ready to go home yet. I’m on a high after confronting Megan and getting my proof, but I’m still a little mad at Colson. I need to grab a coffee, maybe, and think about what I’m going to do.

Jason will never agree to play the audio recording for anyone, so I’m going to have to publish it somehow without permission. I’ve gained a lot of followers since being with Colson, so I know people are bound to see it and probably save it, screen record it or something. It will clear Colson’s name and make Megan look like a total idiot.

I drive to Starbucks and grab a venti coffee, then climb into my car and lock the doors. I pull up my phone and trim the audio recording. My mind is racing and so is my heart. I should let Colson know before I do this, but he wasn’t in his right mind yesterday and I doubt he’s any better today. He’ll probably tell me there’s no point. 

I decide to take a little bit more time to myself. I slept like shit last night, and despite this coffee, I know I’ll be able to nap. I take myself back to Cash and Liv’s place. When I get inside, Cash is on the couch playing video games. He glances over at me. “Hey. You okay?”

I nod. “I just need a nap.”

Cash eyes the coffee in my hand. “Good luck with that.”

I shrug half-heartedly. “Thanks again for letting me stay.”

“Of course,” Cash says, pausing his game. He taps his fingers on his thigh. “Hey, Pres?”

“Hm?”

“Have you talked to Colson since you…left?” he asks. 

I shake my head. “No,” I say weakly. “I know I need to, I just…” I push a hand through my hair. Colson hurt me so badly by talking to me that way. I’m not ready to talk to him yet. What if he’s in the same headspace? What if he says more horrible things to me? Emotionally, I can’t handle it right now. 

“Would you mind if…” Cash pauses, chewing his lip. “Would you mind if I went and checked on him? I know you need space and I 100% support that, but I think maybe Colson needs a friend.”

I consider this and my eyes well up with tears. No matter what, I’m so unbelievably sad for Colson. I need to let him know what happened with Megan but I just can’t do it right now. I don’t even know what I’m going to do with the audio.

“Yes. Please do that,” I say. “Thank you, Cash.”

He smiles softly. “Go get some sleep. Love you.”

“Love you, too,” I say, then go to the guest room and pass the fuck out. 

I wake up when the sky is dark. Shit, guess I really needed that nap. I stretch out and reach for my phone. I really need to take it off do not disturb. It’s been that way since I left home almost a full day ago, and at the very least, I need to let Colson know that I’m okay, that we’re okay. We can make it through a fight. I’m confident in that. This is going to fix everything and we can go back to normal. When I get home later, I can explain everything in person and we can decide what to do together. 

I sigh as I turn off do not disturb, finally feeling ready to message Colson. As expected, there are tons of texts and missed calls from him. Even a voicemail. I listen to that first and frown at his voice. He sounds so devastated and guilt stabs me like a knife. But at the same time, he was out of line and I needed space. Cash went over to check on him, but I’m so torn on how to feel. 

I call Colson back but it goes straight to voicemail. I frown and try twice more, but he doesn’t answer. I scroll to our texts, finding a ton of messages pleading for me to come back. Lots of apologies. I text him back but my iMessage won’t go through. I send it as a text message, but worry causes my heart to race. Why is his phone off? Why isn’t he answering? Does he just need space from me or is something else going on? 

Just then, a soft knock sounds on my door. I sit up in bed and call out for the person to come in. Cash appears in the doorway and immediately, I can tell something is wrong. I turn on the lamp and scrutinize him. He looks exhausted and terrified and traumatized. “Cash?” I ask worriedly. “Come here.”

He walks over and sits on the edge of the bed, pushing a hand slowly through his hair. His hand trembles as it returns to his lap. “What is going on?” I ask anxiously.

Cash’s lip trembles but he takes a deep breath. “I need you to just listen,” he says, “and not panic because everything is okay now.”

“Cash, what the fuck is going on?” I ask, and my voice is whiny with fear. 

“Colson is staying overnight at the hospital. He’s safe,” Cash says. Instantly, my blood runs cold and my hands start to shake. The hospital?

“Wh-what?” I whimper.

“Just let me get this out. Okay?” he asks, glancing at me before quickly looking away. “When I got over there, he kind of lost it. Broke down. Before I got there…” He pauses, swallowing hard. “If I hadn’t gotten there when I did, he was going to…he was going to take a bottle of pills.”

I blink, stiffening. “Wait.” I try to swallow but my mouth is dry. I scramble out from under the blankets and get up, pacing on shaky legs. “No. No no no,” I whimper, eyes filling with tears. “Oh god, Colson.”

“Presley,” Cash says firmly. I snap my head over so I can look at him. “Let me get this out.” His voice is firm and it shuts me up. I nod. 

“He didn’t take anything,” Cash continues. “I took him to the ER because I was worried. But he instantly regretted his actions. He scared the shit out of himself, Pres.”

I can’t stop shaking and I’m on the verge of a panic attack. My Colson, my sweet husband, thinking there was nothing left, no reason to live. The love of my life, intending to take his own life if my brother hadn’t shown up when he did. I crumple to the floor but I keep my mouth shut. 

Cash gets up and comes over to me, wrapping me in his arms. He scoops me up and brings me back to the bed, cradling me in his arms. “It’s okay, Pres,” he says weakly. “He’s staying overnight and he can come home tomorrow. I really think he’s okay. I think he scared himself enough that he would never dream of doing something like that again.”

“Cash…” Tears spill down my cheeks and I can’t stop them. My body trembles with sobs as I cling to my brother. “This is my fault.”

“Presley, no,” Cash says firmly. He cups my chin roughly so I’ll look at him. “Don’t you dare.”

“If I hadn’t left…”

“If you hadn’t left, then your fight would have escalated,” Cash interrupts. “You both would’ve said things you regretted.”

“Bullshit. This is my fault,” I insist, pushing off of him to get to my feet again. 

“Presley, this is not your fault–”

“How?” I cry, throwing up my hands. “I left him, Cash! I left him when he was at his lowest and then I turned off notifications so he couldn’t even get ahold of me, the one person who he needed to stand by him! How the fuck is this not my fault?” 

“Oh, so you’re just not allowed to have feelings?” he shoots back, getting to his feet. 

My brow furrows. “Huh?”

“So you’re not allowed to be upset about any of this. Megan’s accusations. Colson’s behavior because of said accusations,” he says. “You’re supposed to be perfectly strong for Colson and sacrifice your own mental health.”

“That’s…that’s not…”

“Yes it is, Pres,” Cash says firmly, walking closer to me. “You’re being way, way too fucking hard on yourself.”

“But he was going to kill himself, Cash,” I say miserably, face crumpling again.

“I know,” Cash says. “Hey.” He grabs my chin and turns my head gently so I’m forced to look into his eyes. “Could you have stayed? Sure.” He shrugs. “But something was bound to happen. What happened that made you leave?”

I swallow hard, then explain it to him. Cash nods and sighs. “Anyone in their right mind would have done the same thing as you,” he says gently. “Presley, I don’t care how much you love Colson or how much he was hurting. You didn’t deserve that and you deserved to get some space from the whole thing. No one could blame you for that.”

I slump over, hanging my head, and heave out a huge sigh. “Fuck,” I whimper.

Cash’s hand goes to my shoulder. “It’s okay, Pres,” he says quietly. “None of this is anyone’s fault but Megan’s. If you need to blame someone, blame that bitch.”

“Cash, she confessed,” I say, looking up at him. “That’s where I was this morning when no one could get ahold of me.”

Cash blinks in shock. “Wait, what?”

I nod. “I went to her house,” I explain. “I had my phone recording in my bag. She confessed to the whole damn thing.”

“Let me hear,” Cash says hastily. I pull my phone out and open up to the clip. Cash’s eyes widen and by the end of it, he’s even smiling. “Holy shit. You got her to confess, Presley. What are you going to do?”

“Post it to Instagram,” I say. “Tag her ass. And hope it’s up long enough for people to hear it and not get it taken down.”

“Do it,” Cash says. “Now. Post it right now.”

“Are you sure?” I ask.

“Send it to me. I’ll post it, too,” he says. “Hell, we all will. Let me call the others.”

Within half an hour, everyone is at Cash’s place. Ashleigh, Slim, Rook, Baze. Within minutes, everyone has the recording and we sit around the living room, our fingers hovering over the post button.

Cash looks around at us. “Are we ready?”

“Ready,” Slim says.

“Consequences be damned,” Ashleigh says. “This shit ends now.”

“Okay,” Cash nods. “We post in 3…2…1.” 

And now, the clip is out for everyone to hear.

Taglist: @triplexdoublex@jaxbreaker@mgklove99xx@jinx-on-mars-19xx@iamnotanearthlingmotherfucker@anonymousme86@whiteleoqueen@feroniakutenpuu@hxllywoodwhxree

[abiiors]

overall getting more and more disappointed in the 75 space / people involved in it :( people writing off gabbriette’s starbucks post as being “uneducated” / going back to casually talking about her/reblogging her being like “omg so cunty 😍😍 she’s mother!” (she’s closer to 30 than closer to being a teenager, she’s far old enough to understand.) her deleting palestine comments/censoring them, the band/dirtyhit/jamie not doing anything about those two pest brothers groping UNDERAGE women at their shows, matty making his whole brand being an activist just to not talk about the very active genocide (guess it just doesn’t benefit him to talk about.) and the kanye west listening party gabbriette was casually posting about lol. it seems a lot of what happened in this last year would make him a bit softer and wanting to show people he’s not as bad as people say (the nazi comments / everything else.) all to go see kanye (something we wouldn’t have known about had she not casually been posting about it.) and not talking about something so obviously important after calling the malaysian government “fascist cunts” and saying rage against the machine isn’t actually punk for playing in malaysia, when he’s being as meek/embarrassingly about palestine as people in the fandom criticize (like taylor swift) and potentially losing jack as a friend.

idk i hope this made some sense, i’ve been looking at some of mattys old speeches/stories from 2021 and he seemed so much more confident, comfortable and happy. overall not as miserable seeming and a lot more open about his beliefs instead of playing up the weird truman black act he has going on.

i agree 100% with what you’re saying, i am honestly genuinely disappointed about everything that’s happened with the band recently — not talking about a genocide, extending special privileges to creeps (and like i’m also referring to the whole adam powell thing that happened ages ago) it’s just left a bad taste in my mouth because before i was so sad that shows are ending soon and now i just think the break might be a good idea honestly

[binchansbiceps]

I Have Been Playing With A Superstar Chapter 5

Going through both of yours and Mini closets looking for outfits for the concerts even going to the mall and going from store to store looking for the perfect items. You two had a sleepover and the next day spent the whole day listening to Stray Kids and getting dressed and makeup done. Filling both the clear side purses you both bought with everything you thought you two would need for the day. Finally it came time to head to the concert hall for the sound check with a happy giddiness. You both got in Mini’s car and of course had to stop at starbucks beforehand. 

Getting to the building and parking, you both got out of the car and headed into the building. After showing the tickets and making your way to the seating area, you both found your seats and waited for the boys to come out. It was then your phone vibrated with multiple notifications pulling your phone out. You saw Felix had made a small group chat with you, him and one other. 

Hey i’m Han Jisung it’s nice to finally be able to talk to you Y/N

Uh hi Han nice to talk with you to

Are you here yet with your friend?

Yeah we are standing near our spots, Mini’s all excited and taking pictures for her followers

That’s great we are all soo excited to meet you me especially since i’ve finally convinced Felix to let me talk with you

Aww thank you and i had no idea you were so excited to meet me

Yeah anytime i saw you guys were playing like mario kart i always joined in to 

You just seem like your soo cool and fun

Awww thank you Han i have to say you seem like soo much fun in the videos you guys post .

to youtube

And wait did you say you always played with us in mario Kart??

Yeah i loved playing with you guys i would grab my switch and joined him in his room and joined the room you two were in to play too

Aww Han thats soo sweet

And id love to play with you more later when you've got the time

That sounds awesome id love too

Sorry Y/N Han stole my phone and made this chat i was just getting my makeup done 

It’s okay Felix he was really nice and fun to talk to Han 

Cant wait to see you in a few minutes when you get on stage

Speaking of we have to go do that now ill see you after if not during 

Putting your phone away you sat up a little straighter and looked to the stage knowing they were about to come out. When the boys came out you and Mini both screamed and cheered along. One thing you noticed that during the performance Felix looked to be distracted. “Felix looks distracted any idea why?” Mini asked you, noticing it too “you don’t think he’s looking for me do you?” you asked her back. She looked like she was mulling it over thinking about how likely it might be before going back to cheering and dancing to the performance. 

When the performance was over you and Mini sat in your chairs still and once everyone else had left a man had come over to the two of you asking why you were still there. The two of you then pulled out the backstage passes Felix had given you and the man smiled “you must be Y/N and her friend” he stated “i’m their manager please come with me” he said and started to walk towards the stage. As the two of you followed him into the wings of the stage and into the back rooms he led the two of you to an office meeting room space. “Please have a seat and we can go over the NDA” he said gesturing to the chairs on your side of the table. Going over the do’s and don’ts to talking about and sharing things about the boys with others and online the two of you signed the papers. And the manager looked them over then placed them in a briefcase and closed it back up. “Alright now that that is done let me go inform the boys and see what they say” he said and got up and left the room. You looked at Mini and smiled in excitement and she smiled back. It was a few minutes later when he came back “follow me” he said and the two of you followed along. 

When he stopped in front of a door and smiled to the two of you as he opened the door and immediately Felix was right there with Han right behind him looking over his right shoulder. Felix smiled and pulled you into a hug “Y/N!! You're here!!” he cheered, you laughed and hugged him back “it’s so cool to be here thank you again so much Felix” you told him. As the two of you pulled away Han nudged Felix out of the way and hugged you next “Y/N it’s so nice to meet you” Han had said and you could hear Felix introducing himself to Mini and vice versa. As Han pulled away he led you into the room and there you saw the other boys, Chan was the first of the others to come say hi and introduce himself. Next were the four on the couch Changbin, Hyunjin, Seungmin and I.N then Lee Know said hi from across the room seeming to be stand off ish and watching over all. 

Mini and you had been introduced to them and they had been introduced to the two of you. With that everyone had gotten comfortable and had sat around, the boys had ordered food for everyone as they had planned to just stay there till show time and had invited the two of you to stay with them. Joking, laughing and talking, the ten of you got along perfectly. While Lee Know seemed to take the longest to warm up to you and Mini but you didn’t hold it against him he just wanted to protect the members and their career from anything that might harm them.

[hecateisalesbian]

UNO REVERSE. GIMME ALL 50 OF 'EM.

For the wild card... what was your least favorite question out of all of these to answer?

 Do you have freckles?  i think? Yeah? Only like a few tho

 Do you drink tea or coffee? How do you take it?  hohoooo your gonna regret asking me this question >:3 For Tea I have a very specific tea brand I always buy and it’s the Arizona Green Tea Diet and then yknow occasional Peace Tea and on some occasions tea leaves. For Coffee when it’s at Starbucks I get one Grande size Vanilla Iced (Gay) Latte with 2 Splendas and almond milk! At home though I just brew up some coffee and put creamer and vanilla unsweetened almond milk with a 1:3 ratioish and a spoonful of Splenda.

What was the last song you listened to?  The entire Nimona album lol

Do you sleep on your back, stomach or side?  Back or Side because I rotate but never directly on the stomach

Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?  Yes. The amount changes tho. But rn I have a stuffed animal called Rat Cat and then my dog 🐶

Do you prefer drawing or writing?  they equally suck

What’s your ideal number of blankets to sleep with?  i always always always have to sleep with a very specific blanket for my anxiety and that’s really all I need

What’s your favorite band/artist?  errrrr Lovejoy or Lemon Demon or Mother Mother?

When is your birthday? Not sharing that but my fake one is March 7th

How tall are you? Like 5’2”

What color are your eyes? Very dark brown (boring Ik)

Who are five (or more) people you want to hug right now? My Irl friends and my sister

Fears? Bugs, Spiders, T h e D a r k

What’s your favorite color? Purple obvs 💜

What’s your favorite season? Fall, because depending on where you are it’s so wonderful and the weather is perfect and everything is so pretty and also it’s SPOOKY SEASON 🎃

Want any tattoos? What of? Many. Idk how many but my basics are a sibling tattoo with my sister, a matching tattoo with my mom that I’ve already designed, a star, sun, and moon tattoo with my sister and my mom, a snake or two somewhere, some flowers maybe, a semicolon, etc

Want any piercings? Where? YES. Lots of places! I want to deck out my ears, probably get some nose piercings, lip piercings, eyebrow piercings, and then idk from there

Who is the last person you texted? My friend

Do you have a best friend? How long have you been friends? I used to but not anymore

What/who do you miss? My sister

How was your day today? Well I woke up like 2 minutes ago

How much sleep did you get last night? Idk man I just pass out whenever

Do you believe in aliens? Idk theirs probably smth else besides us on this dingy space rock

When was the last time you cried? Why? When I sneezed 6 times in a row a minute ago

What’s your favorite decade? Hmmmmm. Idk. Early 2000’s maybe, 60’s-80’s seem cool

What are some seemingly childish things you like? Stuffed animals, ‘kids’ shows, wanting to play on swing sets

What’s your favorite book? Or just one you’ve read a few times? Uhhh Idk if this is my favorite but I really really like the book series called Strange The Dreamer!

How are you, really? Idk

Does it take you a long time to make decisions? I’m extremely indecisive

What are you looking forward to in the near future? Doing some musicals/plays, Halloween, seeing my sister again, going to a con

What are you looking forward to in the distant future? Moving lol, hopefully finding a partner

If you could go anywhere right now, where would you go? My home state Colorado

Do you sleep with your door open or closed? Who- who sleeps with it open? Ew. Closed.

What’s your favorite flower? I don’t have one 🤷🏼‍♀️

Do you currently have a squish?  😎 🤏🤨🕶️🤏 a what. Okay after a quick google search this looks like a QPR. I used to but not rn

Do you like your middle name? I love it! It holds a lot of meaning to it and it’s actually the name I choose after realizing I’m trans (and also I generally hated my first name)

Do you prefer dogs or cats? Im allergic to cats so I have to say dogs but I love cats. But snakes are number one 🐍

Do you have any phobias? Arachnophobia

Do you stay up late? Well let’s just say im daggers friend from two days ago

Do you like the beach? Do you prefer it sunny or cloudy? Hate the beach. Clouds all the way. Mountains are THE BEST

What’s your favorite cartoon? The Owl House 🦉

Tag 5 of your favorite blogs @bloodied-dagger @el-fandom-birb @haystarlight@imhumanguysiswear@stars-and-birds@threegoblinart@childlikegoblinqueen@artkittycatty@tardismama@fandomsandflyingstingrays@rosy-tickles@ALL OF MY MUTUALS

Do you have siblings? How many? Uh I have two blood related sisters, two step brothers, and one brother in law

Who was the last person you said “I love you” to? My dog probably. Other than that my mom

Is there anyone you would die for? My sister, my dog, my friends, my parents

What do you need when you’re sad? Happiness lol. Naw in all seriousness my dog

Have you memorized your phone number? If you haven’t I hope you like dying

Who’s someone you can trust with your life? My sister 

What does your last text say? “Oh”

My least favorite question was all of them because I woke up 6 minutes ago why am I doing this

[oliviainjapann]

May 25th- Osaka Day Trip

Today was a very successful day in Osaka! In the morning my friends and I cooked breakfast together and make eggs and it was so wholesome and cute. I will be doing that from now on for the rest of our breakfasts. We then had our class meeting, and then started our trip to Osaka. The train wasn’t bad because my friends and I did a spotify jam again which was fun to listen to one another music. Upon arrival to Osaka, we first went to another observation deck. I’m not the biggest fan of them, but it was cool to see the highway in between the buildings. Ryder and I also tried to take aesthetic photos with our matching new adidas but they did not turn out too great. We got lunch in the basement floor which I was not the biggest fan of because there weren’t the greatest options and we settled on Indian again. I’m usually a fan of Indian but I’ve been having it too much. We then went to Osaka Castle, which was really massive and cool to see from the outside. Ryder and I once again tried to get good pics and it did not work out once again. The whole class watched us too which was funny. We then went to the shopping district where we split up as a class and my group first went to Starbucks to relax for a minute. We then shopped around a bit and got some clothes and then traveled to Umida station where Ryder wanted to get new sunglasses. The girls and I looked for shoes, and I found another cute pair that I wanted so bad so I in fact got another pair of shoes. How I will fit them into my luggage I am not sure of. We then called it a day and travelled home as we were quite tired and ready to lay in bed.

Academic Reflection

Todays reading focused on the urbanization of Osaka and urban planning in general. It really stuck with me that Japan simply destroys buildings to build new ones in their places, rather than renovating them as the US typically does. Even historically significant buildings in Japan aren’t protected like they are in America. Also, seeing the highway built in between buildings was a perfect example of how businesses in Japan will use as much space as they can to maximize profit. I’m glad Professor Smith pointed this highway out to us!

It was also very surprising to me how Osaka is so industrialized and almost NYC-esque than I expected. Corporations and businesses definitely try to profit off of any square inch that they can get, and market everything towards tourists and eye-appealing designs, such as the large crab or octopus on the outside of restaurants that we saw! Everything was also very mismatched and had work, play, and leisure aspects altogether once again, until the US that is a bit more planned and organized. This is honestly a very functional design and allows one to have everything they need right at their finger tips!

[matsukawamatt]

Back into this loop of thinking of the matsukawa apartment. So many sleepless nights listening to lofi and left alone to my thoughts. So much beautiful, natural light coming into the apartment in the daytime. By night, the glow of the city and the alternating of the stop light that shown in my window. The rainy nights, where I would keep my balcony door open, and let the sound of it all drown me away. It was my own little space and I made it all mine. I miss the smell; the distinctive combination of the hardwood floors and concrete & brick walls. The small little bedroom that I barely used, just resting on my couch in the main room most of the time. The shine of the stainless steel in the kitchen that I never used. I had Mira right down stairs to take on a ride to wherever I desired. Or a metro just a few blocks away if it didn’t make sense to drive, and it usually didn’t make sense. I had Paul in Fukuoka to go out and drink with. I had the multiple clubs I would go to and just lose myself, mindlessly dancing into the early (and sometimes late) morning hours. I’d grab some ramen, and I’d hang out for a bit to recover. Later in the day i’d go to that one Starbucks, the reserve one at hakata, and i’d always see Yomogi there. Her smile was so amazing. She was always so excited to see me and, she’d tell me to come sit at the bar, as she hand-poured piping hot coffee in concentric circled into a flask with a filter — it was an art. I’d stop by half-penny and make some friends at the bar. Or the Red Fox. Or.. and oh my god… the sun empire. That fucking bar. I wish I could explain the feeling that place gives me to think about. It brings tears to my eyes. THAT was my place. So many memories. Even if I were to go back, it would not be there. Which brings to mind… what remains? I’m sure theres many places. I need to get back to Fukuoka… and although this is a post about matsukawa, fukuoka is as comforting to me as matsukawa was.

Everything about Matsukawa was so amazing to me. It was the place where I felt safe. A place for me to escape and be my self and on my own.

I will never have a place like that again. But, I do have lofi, and I do have the memories.

These tears are good tears; these bring me warmth and happiness. They bring me back to a time that was, a time that no longer exists. A time where I had friends that I loved and I had a reason to keep going.

Whenever I’m asked about my time in the Navy, I describe it as two extremes. One extreme is a scenario where I absolutely hated my life and was unhappier than I’ve ever been. This was the patriot. The next extreme: i absolutely loved everything in my life and every moment spent with the people that loved me, and with the amazing people of japan. Two extremes. Two polar opposites. Its no wonder im as fucked up as i am now

[marymcburnie]

T,

I’m not really sure how to start something like this. I’ve gone over and over how to say this to you in person, but sometimes words work better for me in writing. It’s been eight months of knowing you. And on the day we chatted up a Starbucks that was so not meant to be a sit down and chat Starbucks, I had no idea the impact you would have on my life, in such little time. I’ve had more fun with you than I’ve had in years. I don’t even remember the last time I met somebody who can make me forget the darkness of the world completely. You do that for me. But you also make that darkness feel safe and OK. Since meeting you, I appreciate the simple things so much more, and being in the moment, taking things less serious, is easier for me now. And that feels good. You’ve also shown and given me pleasure that I didn’t think was ever possible. I remember the night we drove to the beach and we talked about sex and relationships and our past. I told you about the abuse that I had experienced and how most of my sexual history was under the influence. You laughed and told me “oh, you haven’t even experienced the best sex of your life yet”, you said you were excited for me. Another special moment were you made something that was so heavy for me feel lighter. You took away the severity while still making me feel heard, seen and safe. You’ve done that a lot.

Through all our conversations, I want you to know I hear you. And as I share from my heart right now, I want you to know I respect how you feel, where you’re at and what you have communicated you’re available for. But I can’t move out of state without telling you that I love you. As a man, a friend, and what feels like so much more. Especially in the last couple of months, we went from big adventures every so often to spending more time, just being home and building the desk, working on the house, cooking steak. It showed me a different side of you, of us and it’s shown me even more that you’re such a beautiful example of what I want in a partner. I know I’ve told you this before. And, like I said, I hear you and respect you. But I want you. I want to do this life thing with you. I want giggles in the morning. Safe spaces and adventure. I want to shower with you more than alone and I want a kiss goodbye every time we say see you later. I want palms on thighs while we drive. Salty kisses under waves in the ocean. Sand dollar gifts and cup of noodle movies. I want simple and spectacular. Mellow and passionate. Silly and soft. Rough and loyal. Honest and kind. I want you to tell me when I can do better and I want to listen. I want to watch you grow and hold space while anger builds and passes. I want to learn to use my hands and talk about life under the midnight sky. I want to jump with you in celebration, dance with you while we cook, collect kittens and build homes. I want it all with you. And if you ever feel ready, and want to explore something more with me, I think we would be pretty fucking spectacular together. For now, I just needed you to know. That I love you, and it’s been pretty epic feeling this way. So thank you.

♡ M

[fahrni]

Saturday Morning Coffee

Good morning from Charlottesville, Virginia! ☕️

It looks like we’ll be getting heavy rain all day with chances of flash flooding. I think we’ll be fine where we are as far as flooding goes but I wouldn’t be surprised if we lose power.

Good thing my coffee is brewed and in hand. 😃

Sarah Vogelsong • virginiamercury.com

Youngkin declares state of emergency ahead of Tropical Storm Ophelia

So, yeah, this is why we have a state of emergency here in Virginia. Overnight we got a bit of rain, enough to have standing water in the yard, but we’ll be fine. I feel for folks in lower lying areas. The town of Staunton often has flooding issues. Here’s hoping everyone stays safe and dry today. 🤞🏼

Nathan Edwards • The Verge

Mastodon, the federated microblogging platform, has been updated to version 4.2, which comes with massive improvements to search and the web interface, particularly for logged-out and first-time users.

The tiny open source crew behind Mastodon continues to deliver excellent features and they do it right unlike Space Karen’s company.

While I wish some friends would leave the bird place I’m still extremely happy to have this space to share and have wonderful conversations with amazing people every day. ❤️

Paul Sutter • Space.com

The loss of dark skies is so painful, astronomers coined a new term for it

This is pretty sad, isn’t it? I read this great piece in The Bitter Southerner a few years back that talked about a small town in Georgia Astronomers love because it’s so dark out there. 🌚

Joe George • Den Of Geek

The Star Trek Next Generation Story That Connects the Borg to The Original Series Crew

My question for Star Trek fans, do you love this or hate this?

I like it! 👍🏼

Vjeran Pavic • The Verge

Apple recently extended its deal for Qualcomm modems despite years of effort to develop its own — now we know why. According to a detailed report from the Wall Street Journal, Apple’s attempt to develop its own in-house 5G modem has been stymied by issues resulting from the iPhone maker underestimating the complexity and technical challenges of the task, and a lack of global leadership to guide the separate development groups siloed in the US and abroad.

This is a surprise to me. I can’t see it being because of the technical challenges. I could understand them saying “It’s just not ready.” But a technical challenge? Perhaps? 🤔

Joel Chrono • joelchrono12.xyz

This post was inspired by Rob Fahrni’s post, Saturday Morning Coffee. It has absolutely nothing to do with the content itself, but I got up, served myself a coffe, and wrote all this…

Hey! I inspired someone to write on their blog! That’s never happened before! It’s really wonderful and I hope Joel continues to write and bring us interesting content. Thanks for the love, Joel! ❤️

Ageist

I believe we’ve got retirement wrong. Hear me out. In the early 1990s, I attended my first business trip as a fresh-faced 23-year-old eager to make my mark in the world. I found myself at a workshop, listening to a speaker discuss the concept of retirement. At that age, retirement was a distant, almost foreign concept. Still, one statement from the speaker stuck in my mind: “People know to prepare financially for retirement but don’t know to prepare mentally.” He revealed a startling fact: mortality rates increase dramatically within the first three years of retirement. This revelation has stayed with me ever since.

Right. Do not retire and live like Blue Zone folks live. I actually love this idea.

Not retiring can take on different forms so go read the piece. Folks that know me know I want to write my own software if I ever achieve the financial stability to do it. I’ve considered doing part time work for someone like Starbucks just to socialize a bit. When we lived in Exeter I would frequent Exeter Coffee Company and hang out with a ragtag gang of folks. That’s living in my book. 👍🏼

Robert Harrington • palmerreport.com

What does it mean should Trump’s bail be revoked? First it’s important to recall he’s out on bail on four different felony charges in the first place. In other words, “out on bail” means he’s free and at liberty at the pleasure of four separate jurisdictions. If that bail is revoked in any of those jurisdictions, US marshals will be sent to wherever Trump is at the moment and summarily drag him out — in handcuffs — and take him to jail.

I know some people don’t believe a former President should be indicted of a crime much less be prosecuted or spend time in jail if convicted. I’m certainly not one of those people. TFG is a criminal and as such deserves a bit of time in the clank. 🚓

And, yeah, even at the risk of violence. If we allow certain people to get away with anything we don’t have a democracy or the rule of law. 🧑‍⚖️

Catherine Thorbecke • CNN

Alyssa Henry, the CEO of Square – a unit of Jack Dorsey’s fintech company, Block – will leave her post at the company next month.

I wonder if Jack plans to sell Block off to Space Karen so he can realize his everything app? 🤣

Valerie Ettenhofer • /Film

While you won’t find a “Joker” alternate ending available to view online, rumors about one persist thanks to a tidbit shared by filmmaker Kevin Smith on his “Fatman Beyond” podcast (via CinemaBlend). In a discussion of the film, Smith explains that he was told about a proposed original ending for the movie in which Arthur himself is revealed to be the Wayne family’s killer, and Bruce Wayne ends up in his crosshairs.

This would’ve been an amazing ending for Joker! The only problem with that is we couldn’t have sequels where Joker and Batman tangle.

I want so badly to see a Batman movie or series of movies that feature Joker exclusively. That may be too much to pull off so at the very least give us A Death in The Family in movie form. In Superman vs. Batman we get a glimpse of Robin’s — Jason Todd — armor in a glass case with Jokers writing on it. Great Easter egg.

Dave Rogers

The second night I was there, two more of our classmates joined us. One was a retired Air Force E-9 who’d worked in meteorology his whole career. The other is a highly trained engineer. Climate came up again, this time from the engineer. He’s convinced we can solve the crisis. Our host told him not to ask me, because he wouldn’t like the answer. But our Air Force friend was in my camp. It was interesting to me to listen to his take. Our views differ somewhat, but our conclusions are the same. It’s too late to avert a general collapse of civilization, likely before this century is out.

I like Dave’s writing a lot. He’s very open in what her shares and is extremely concerned with the state of the state of Florida. It’s a complete nightmare to live in if you’re an empathetic, caring, person. The GOP lead government doesn’t care about anyone or anything.

Dave’s take may seem a bit dark but I think he’s hit the nail on the head. We have screwed ourselves in the name of capitalism and investor return. And we’ve screwed future generations. 🤬

Bradley Brownell • Jalopnik

The United Auto Workers strike has expanded from three facilities to 41, as contract negotiations continue to slog on. Ford and the UAW have come together to form a tentative agreement, and while there is still a lot of work to be done, the union has chosen not to expand its striking efforts against Ford facilities.

Here’s an industry where we need radical transformation, now. I know the piece is about workers and I hope they’re able to negotiate and get what they need to survive and thrive.

At one point Detroit was a model of the middle class because of the automobile.

<img border=“0” src=“https://static.crabapples.net/troll-picking-nose.JPG" align=“right” alt=“Beware of Trolls.”/>

James Robins • defector.com

Musk’s life and personality, it turns out, is not so hard to contain. It is flat and shallow and open for all to read. The difficulty comes when Isaacson tries to impose some fabricated complexity on a not-very-complex man, and uses that illusion of knottiness as an excuse to paper over a much truer and more interesting story.

Space Karen isn’t the genius everyone thinks he is. He’s a bully who needs someone to smash his nose a few times so he’ll understand that treating people like crap has consequences.

Garbage human who managed to con his way into crap tons of money.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

240 of 2023

What are three things that were in style when you were in high school?

I’ve never paid much attention to fashion, but one thing I clearly remember was that all the girls were wearing skinny jeans and high boots.

What is one random fact about you?

There’s a photo of me sitting on a pantograph of a tram. It’s somewhere in my workmate’s phone.

Do you spend a lot of time outdoors in the summer?

Not only in summer. Also in winter.

What is your favorite summer month?

June, because the longest days.

What do you want to be for Halloween this year?

I don’t celebrate Halloween.

When do you plan to start decorating for fall?

I personally don’t see the point of cluttering the house for seasons other than Christmas and maybe Easter.

Every September, do you always wish you were going back to school?

In normal circumstances, this is when I come back to uni.

What was your favorite class in high school?

Anything to do with physics, biology, chemistry and computers.

Do you have a desk in your room? If so, do you use it as a desk that you sit and work at?

No, there’s no space for a desk.

Do you have a hope chest? If so, what do you keep in it?

No, never did.

What’s one goal that you have for yourself this year?

To improve my hand further.

Do you use a backpack?

I do, for work, uni and all travels.

What did your favorite backpack in high school look like?

I had a bag because it’s been my goth years.

Have you ever shopped at Limited Too? If yes, what was your favorite thing you owned from there?

Never heard of it.

Do you wear band tees? if yes, which one is your favorite?

Yeah, I have three Vildhjarta tees and my favourite is the one with wolves.

What color is your desk in your room, if you have one?

I don’t have a desk.

Would you ever want to live in a home with all-white walls and furniture?

Yes, but with some colourful accents here and there.

Do you have pajama days often?

No, almost never.

What was the last flavor of tea you drank?

I don’t drink tea.

What was the last thing you ordered from Starbucks?

Probably hot chocolate.

Do you have a favorite barista at Starbucks?

No, I order online.

What is one thing you’re behind on?

Physical mobility.

Do you ever re-arrange your room?

Never.I hate moving the furniture, and I’m physically disabled anyway.

Do you share a room with anyone?

I share a bedroom with my husband.

Who was your first roommate?

No one, I guess. My sister had her own room.

Do you ever talk to your first roommate?

N/A.

What season do you want to get married in?

I’m married already, it was March.

Do you own a teepee?

What is teepee?

Frosting: chocolate or vanilla?

Vanilla, but I don’t like frosting.

Ice cream: chocolate or vanilla?

Chocolate for once, even though I don’t like chocolate that much.

Milkshake: chocolate or vanilla?

Strawberry, checkmate.

Do you drink protein shakes?

No, their taste is awful.

What was the last type of candy you ate?

I on’t remember, I’m not much of a candy guy.

Do you take birth control pills?

I don’t see any reason why a person who is a biological male would take them, unless for ruining their hormonal system or transitioning into female.

What was the last craft project you completed?

I usually don’t do crafts, unless photography counts.

Which is better: starting things or finishing them?

Finishing. Very satisfying.

Is your style bohemian at all?

No, I don’t see myself like that.

What is the highest name-brand thing you own?

I think Calvin Klein.

Have you ever sold on Poshmark?

No, I’m not even sure if it operates here. But I’ve sold on 2dehands.be and it even worked.

Do you have a Poshmark account?

No, I don’t.

What color GameBoy did you have as a kid?

I didn’t have any.

What was your favorite GameBoy game?

None.

What was your favorite Backstreet Boys song?

What, I’ve never listened to them. I’m a dude, after all.

Did you ever wonder what it felt like to get slimed?

I don’t even know what that means.

Did you ever name a pet after an imaginary friend?

Never had an imaginary friends.

Have you ever hallucinated?

Guess so.

Do you believe in angels and demons?

Not really.

What is holding you back from living your dreams?

Health problems.

Do you have a paypal account?

I do. It’s handy when my bank card doesn’t work (it does only on Belgian websites).

Do you like your hair better curly or straight?

I like it short, that’s it. The rest doesn’t matter.

[icysab]

boyfie things with han seojun returns at popular demand for a part three~!

@youlookprettywithoutmakeup i’ve noticed you’ve been following me for awhile, and i just want to say i rlly appreciate it!! here’s the part three you were asking about ^-^

may contain kdrama/webtoon spoilers

gender neutral reader

without further ado, here it is!!

- he lets you do his makeup if you want to!

- you don’t need to add blush because he’s already blushing

- he does your makeup once too

- secretly makes a list of your favorite things in his notes app and things like your starbucks order, etc

- he tells you he “just remembered” though

- if you guys were apart, you’d watch terrible movies together on an app like discord or screenshare on facetime or something and make fun of them together

- will give you his jacket if you’re cold— even the expensive leather jacket he doesn’t let anyone else touch

- he won’t hesitate to kill you though if you do anything to it

- he finds it infatuating how well you get along with gowoon and his mom

- oh and those two absolutely adore you

- he really, really likes your hands

- if you have smaller hands, he finds it cute, and if you have larger hands, he finds it hot.

- he absentmindedly plays with your hands

- two words: sharing earbuds.

- you have playlists for eachother

- at one point you just decide to get a duo spotify account

- he sprays his cologne on hoodies, etc before he gives them to you

- will always make space in his pockets for your things if you don’t have any

- loves listening to you talk about things you’re passionate about

- if you’re close with your family, he’d want to impress them so so so bad and be so worried about what they’d think of him

- but he’s great at charming parents and has nothing to worry about

- loves showering at your place so he can use your shampoo and smell like you

- he loves watching you do skincare, if you’re into that sort of thing

- if not, he’d make you establish a skincare routine

- if he didnt like something but you loved it he’d lie and pretend like he loves it too

- he’d shovel spicy food that he can’t handle down his throat if it meant making you happy <3

- late night gas station runs, sitting under the stars together

- he’d save up to take you to a really really nice restaurant for a special occasion

- doesn’t ever forget a birthday or anniversary

- he wouldn’t do much for month anniversaries though, unless you wanted him to

- likes to buy you things and see you smile at him

- he’d hear you talk about how you wanted a love letter and end up writing you one

- and it’s the sweetest thing you’ve ever read

- but you do make fun of his handwriting haha

- likes to study with you

- but not to actually study. no he likes that face you make when you’re thinking or confused.

- promises to grow old together <33

[the-bau-quinjet]

what about doing a steve x reader? maybe where the reader gets hurt during a mission by hydra?? just an idea!! xx

He’s Like a Brother to Me

Summary: Pretending to be a couple for a mission is normal, so why is your Captain so upset?

Warnings: being injured on a mission, kissing, a swear word or two

Word Count: 2202

a/n: My first request!! To the anon that requested this, thank you! I hope you like it :) Sorry if it's not angsty enough! I really tried, but once I got this idea in my head I ran with it. 

Also! I didn't do my normal tag list since y'all requested to be tagged when I was only writing Criminal Minds fics. Just lmk if you want to be tagged in marvel or CM or both!

"The mission is simple. You two will go to the gala as newly weds, pretend to be interested in more than the charitable events of the evening, figure out the chain of command for the weapons dealing, and put a stop to the weapons dealing assholes." Tony laid out the plan as if nothing could go wrong.

You turned to the super soldier on your left, relieved to find a matching grimace on his face.

"We have to pretend to be a couple?" You asked, turning back to Tony.

"Yes. The invites we secured are for Mr. and Mrs. Farley, so you two will be Mr. and Mrs. Farley for the evening. Any other questions?" Before you could chime in with the 17 questions in your head, Tony kept talking. "I didn't think so. Your clothes have already been dropped off to your rooms, so get ready. You'll have Rogers and Wilson doing surveillance in case anything goes wrong." Without another word, Tony forced you and Bucky out of the room.

"I guess I'll see in an hour, husband." You tried to joke, but your smile didn't meet your eyes.

"Same to you, wife." Bucky's face held a similar expression as you both turned your separate ways to get ready for the gala, trying to put the awkwardness behind you.

You and Bucky have been incredibly close ever since he first came back from Wakanda. You became fast friends since you are both so close with Steve.

It was easier for Bucky to open up to you than he anticipated, and in part it's because you remind him of his sister. Similarly, Bucky is like the older brother you never had. The two of you mesh, in the most platonic of ways.

He is there to tease you about your not-so-secret crush on Steve, and your there to help Sam come up with more annoying nicknames (starBucks being one of your favorite to date).

When it comes down to it though, you look out for each other. Of course, that won't make pretending to be a couple any less awkward.

-

You and Bucky enter the gala just after 8:00 pm. The large hotel ballroom is lit up by three enormous chandeliers, spaced throughout the room, with small sconces lining the outside walls. There are round tables around the outside of the room, framing a large open space for dancing.

People are mingling in small groups scattered throughout the room, waitstaff wondering around the room in precise lines to ensure anyone who wants a drink has access to one.

With a deep breath, you link your arm with Bucky's, laughing at the surprised look on his face.

"We have to at least try to sell it." You whispered in his ear, trying to play it off as a cute couple-y thing. "Even if we'd both rather be anywhere else." That comment earned a laugh, easing the tension from his shoulders.

Steve's voice in your ears refocuses you on the mission. "We just got video feed from the security cameras, so we have eyes on you now." You would have sworn you could hear an unfamiliar strain in Steve's voice as he spoke, but you chalked it up to just being nervous for the mission. "Try to mingle, figure out who's in charge."

Mingling was easier said than done. Every time the two of you tried to talk to anyone, the conversation was awkward and tense. You just didn't know how to answer questions about falling in love with each other. Ultimately, you decided eavesdropping was your best bet. Bucky pulled you to the dance floor, whispering in your ear as he held you, "dancing is the perfect cover for moving around the room."

You nodded your head in response, wrapping your arms around his neck.

"What are you doing? I said to mingle, not dance." Steve's voice in your ears surprised you. Normally, he'd stay quiet unless he received intel that could help with the mission or noticed something for you to look into.

"We're listening to other conversations, relax punk." Bucky's voice was light as he spun you around, closer to the most suspicious people you've found thus far.  

"What time is it happening?" The woman seemed nervous as she checked her watch.

"A few minutes. Relax, we'll meet them down the hall at 8:45." The man was calm and collected as he took her hand, leading her across the dance floor and out of the room.

"Guess that's our cue." You stated the obvious as you and Bucky went to follow them out of the ballroom. The couple turned down a side hallway, pulled out a key card, and entered a room, about halfway down.

You and Bucky made quick work to reach the room, pausing outside to listen in. You heard the couple, along with an unfamiliar voice.

"Do you have them?" The unfamiliar voice asked.

"We do. They're hidden in another room down the hall." the woman again sounded nervous.

"You" the unfamiliar voice must have pointed at someone, "go get them. Your wife will stay here to keep me company. Make it quick, Hydra has more important things to do."

Yours and Bucky's eyes went wide at the mention of Hydra. This mission wasn't supposed to have anything to do with them. Before you could react, footsteps could be heard coming toward the door. You had a few seconds max to figure out a way to hide.

With no other options in sight, you pulled Bucky across the hallway into the world's most awkward kiss. When the door swung open, you pretended not to notice, too lost in your "relationship" to care.

The man you saw earlier walked a few doors down before entering another room. You pulled back from Bucky, wincing slightly at the expression on his face. "I'm so sorry, I couldn't think of anything else to do to make it look like we weren't listening..." You trailed off.

"No, no it's fine. It was the only option." Bucky cleared his throat, still slightly dazed and very thrown off.

"Could the two of you stop staring at each other and get back to work?' Steve's voice was again present in your ears, and this time he was definitely angry.

"Right! Right, of course. Let's go." You awkwardly pushed off the wall, moving down the hallway to the room you saw the man enter. On the count of three, you burst into the room together. It was easy enough to over power the lone man in the room, but you and Bucky were still a little shaken up after the kiss. You handcuffed him to the bedpost, taking the key card he used earlier and moving back down the hallway.

After a brief, awkward eye contact, Bucky opened the door with you rushing in behind him. The only two people in the room were the two you heard earlier, making for a fairly easy take down.

"Cap, we got 'em. Two in room 217 and one in room 223." You started to fill him and Sam in, unsure if they still had eyes on you. At that exact moment, three more Hydra agents ran in from an adjoining room, catching you off guard.

You yelped when the gun went off, surprised at the sudden noise after thinking the mission was over. You and Bucky managed to take down the three agents without much more difficulty.

"Scratch that Cap, five in room 217." You again began filling him in, but the room started spinning. Your voice was wavering when you collapsed, the last thing you heard a mixture of Steve's voice in your ear and Bucky's in person calling your name.

"Y/N!" Then everything faded to black.

-

"What the hell happened in there?" Steve and Bucky were standing just outside of the med bay. After you collapsed, Bucky realized you had been shot in the stomach. While other Shield agents came to collect the men you had stopped, Bucky carried you to the quinjet, meeting a pissed looking Steve at the door.

The two didn't talk at all during the short flight back to the compound. It wasn't until you were in the med bay receiving medical attention that Steve rounded on Bucky.

"There was never any indication that more agents were there. They caught us off guard! I didn't even realize she had been shot until after we had them contained." Bucky was beating himself up. He let his guard down, still trying to get over the lingering weirdness of you kissing him.

"Caught you off guard? Buck-" Before Steve could yell anymore, Dr. Cho came out to talk to them.

"Y/N will be fine. She lost a lot of blood, but she should recover relatively quickly. She'll likely wake up in the next half hour." Dr. Cho got straight to the point, trying to ease the nerves of the two super soldiers.

"Thank you so much. Thank you!" Bucky called over his shoulder as he ran into the room, planting himself by your side. He may be weirded out by the kiss, but he knows you were too. You're still like a little sister to him, nothing could stop him from being there for you when you wake up.

Steve followed Bucky into the room after thanking Dr. Cho and briefly discussing the timeline for your recovery.

"As I was saying. Caught you off guard? I've never seen you caught off guard before." Although he was whispering so as not to disturb you, his words were nearly venomous. "The two of you let your feelings get in the way of this mission."

The look of guilt already present on Bucky's face multiplied tenfold. "You think I don't know that? I should've seen it coming. If I wasn't distracted I could've stopped them before Y/N got hurt."

You woke up at some point, hearing Bucky blame himself. Instantly, you wanted to ease his worries. "Hey," the two men turned to you, concern clear on their faces. "It wasn't your fault, Buck. I was just as distracted. Neither of us saw it coming, even though both of us should have. It doesn't matter though, because we got them, and I'll be fine." You sat up, wincing slightly at the pain in your abdomen.

"How can you say that? Of course it matters! You could have died, all because Bucky was too busy making heart eyes at you to-" Steve's words were cut off by identical sounds of laughter from you and Bucky.

"Heart eyes?! Oh my god, that's hilarious." You stuttered out the words between laughs. Steve look so confused, you couldn't help but laugh at his cute expression.

Every time you thought you were done, one look at either Bucky or Steve had you laughing again. "Oh god, make it stop! It hurts to laugh!" You pouted slightly, begging Bucky to stop laughing and Steve to change his expression.

Finally, Bucky reined it in enough to speak. "I was distracted because Y/N like a little sister. It's definitely a bit distracting to feel like you just kissed your sister" You and Bucky each made a face of disgust as you looked at each other.

Meanwhile, Steve had a look of complete shock on his face. "Wh-what? You two aren't ... ya know?”

Again, you and Bucky share looks of disgust. "God, no. He's like a brother to me."

"Yeah, I love Y/N like a sister. I'm definitely not in love with her." Bucky agrees.

Steve's expression is sheepish as he tries to explain himself, "but, but after the kiss you were staring into his eyes like you were in love!"

"We most definitely were not." Mumbling under your breath, you kept talking "his aren't the blue eyes I'd like to lovingly stare into."

Steve was shocked into silence by your statement.

"I think that's my cue to leave." Bucky wore a smug grin as he slapped Steve on the back, uttering a quick "good luck, punk" before leaving.

It was quiet for a minute, neither of you quite sure what to say.

"Who's blue eyes do you want to stare into?" Steve broke the silence, shuffling closer to sit on the side of your bed.

"What?" It took you an embarrassing amount of time to realize you said that sentence out loud. "I said that out loud?" You threw your hands up to cover your face, mumbling about being an idiot to delay having to answer.

"You did. So... who's blue eyes?" Steve's demeanor quickly shifted from shy to confident. He slowly moved your hands off your face, tilting your chin up to look into your eyes. One look had you confessing all your secrets.

"Yours. It always been yours." He rubbed his thumb across your cheek, leaning in closer to you until your foreheads were touching.

"Let me take you on a date." His words were barely a whisper, the warm air from his breath sending a shiver down your spine. You nodded in response, not trusting your voice.

He leaned in closer, barely brushing his lips over yours. "I need words, sweetheart."

You pushed forward, your lips meeting his in a passionate kiss.

"Yes."

[hongjoongtrasher]

ATEEZ FINAL PART : when they said something to hurt you.

I'm glad you've liked the previous part (part 1 and 2 here if you haven't read it yet), so here is a final to all this angsty reactions (if it is a reaction). Sorry if there are a lot of grammar errors, English not being my mother tongue -

Gosh this is going to be LONG please, bear with me ugh.

Hongjoong:

After this stormy episode of him totally lashing his stress out on you, he spent some time alone to think and reflect upon his trashy behaviour. He was genuinely aware of the massive efforts you were doing for his ass. Literally be patient and taking everything on you so he didn't have to feel more stressed. But today was different. He obviously went too far, saying those words horribly. Furthermore, he knew how hurt you've been because of him and now he didn't really know how to be forgiven. He always have been busy, always considering his work first and thought you were in an equal part of this, but seems he considered you taken for granted. The leader sighed heavily, rubbing his eyes not seeing any solutions at the moment. It's at this moment that Seonghwa entered the place. "Erm...Joong ?" he didn't answer, only Seonghwa could see how much his leader was in distress. "I heard from Y/N, mh I mean she told San who told me but anyway-" began the oldest before Hongjoong asked simply: "Have you come to scold me ?" A silence then. "No, I came to check on you." Seonghwa was always worried about his leader, since he knew the best how hardworking and diligent Hongjoong was, but today he felt like he was wrong. "You've acted like a real idiot this time" Hongjoong let a sarcastic laugh be heard as he slowly turned to face his friend. "Yeah, I know. Do you think she will forgive me ?" "Probably not easily." he answered honestly before continuing. "She told San she was tired of this, always being a shadow to you, erm...and nowadays she's been really stressed at work" A shadow ? Is this how you were seeing yourself as ? And on top of that, he was completely unaware of your work, how life has been going for you. This made the leader felt more guilty as he bite his lips. "So...What should I do ? Kneeling and beg her for forgiveness ?" Seonghwa sighed and put a comforting hand on the leader shoulder. "Sometimes actions are better than words".

And he left the studio, putting Hongjoong in a more difficult situation than he was already. What did he mean ? He thought about it again and again, watching without really watching his screen before it tilted inside his head. "THE SONG !!" he yelled at himself, feeling now very dumb. He had almost forgotten this track, a very secret one he composed for a long time. This song was special for him, it was a song which were written for you, and was conveying all of his feelings. He had to make you listen to this. A glance at his phone indicated it was already 3am in the morning, but sleep could wait. He spent the rest of the night finishing this track, or actually checking it before he saved a copy and directly sent it to you, praying you'd see it in the morning.

You'd spent the most horrible night of your life. Crying and turning under your blanket as you felt useless, no one. San proposed to come with Yunho, but you insisted to be alone, so they let you be, though they were worried. You only found sleep around two in the morning, tired for having crying most of the night. You woke up at six, your eyes hurting, puffy and red as fuck. Anyone could tell you've cried your eyeballs out. First you went to the bathroom to clean your face with cold water, your stuffy nose not helping in the process. After a while you returned to your bedroom and took your phone, not expecting to see a message from your boyfriend, or was he still yours ? At first you hesitated to open it, but finally did. No text, just an audio file. What was this ? Taking your headphone, you put them into your ear before clicking on the file, closing your eyes. At first, you were confused. You've never heard any melody like this one, so...calm, bubbly and soft. Soon Hongjoong's voice appeared with lyrics he surely had written and...you broke in tears again. This time not from sadness, but ...it was like a dream. You could heard his feelings, how much he loved you. You were ready to forgive him, but...it wasn't easy. Reconciliations were always difficult for both of you. Brushing this instantly aside, you rushed out from your apartment for going directly to Hongjoong's studio, in home wear, messy hair and "after crying faced" only to find him asleep on the couch. Panting, you rushed to jump on your boyfriend, sobbing again . This caused Hongjoong to wake up in surprise, confused. "Y-Y/N ?" why ? Why were you crying again ? After a while of you crying heavily on his shirt, he realised you probably came after hearing his song. His arms softly hooked around your tiny waist as one hand rubbed your back. "Shh...don't cry" he said, heartbroken to see you like this. "You dummy !" you yelled between two sobs. "I know." "I - I love you" "Me too, I'm sorry for being a huge dummy" he said with a gentle smile, holding your face to wipe your tears.

Seonghwa:

How rude he's been with you. It's only after hearing your answer that he realised you didn't deserve this. He wanted to chase after you, saying he was sorry, but too late, you slammed the door. Hongjoong came to their shared room before leaning at the door's frame, arching a brow at the oldest. "Can you explain to me what did just happen ?" he asked calmly before Seonghwa bite his lower tier. "I've been a jerk with her" he mumbled, not proud of himself this time. "Yeah, we saw this. You know, she only wanted to cheer you up. We all know you're having bad times because of vocal things, but you didn't have to lash out on her." His leader wasn't wrong, only himself was. "Hwa, go after her. It's not too late" said Hongjoong. "Now ?" Hongjoong sighed. "Yes now, not tomorrow or later" Seonghwa blinked, overthinking before his own body stood up and carried him outside the dorm, chasing after you desperately. He shouldn't have had been this way, he should have been thankful to have you by his side, always being cheerful and bright although sometimes you were hiding your own demons. But being a couple meant for the good and the worst right ? After running for a while, he stopped, panting his lungs on fire. He started to think. Where could you be now ? He remembered when you were sad or stressed, you used to go to Starbucks and get a drink full of sugar and whipped cream, that's how he thought you'd at the nearest one. Not minding people watching him when he opened the door, he eyed the room quickly before seeing you at the table across the entrance. He stepped inside and directly went to your seat as you were still sniffing with tears, your drink between your hands. Not expecting to see your boyfriend, you gasped when you finally realised he was standing here without saying anything. "Y/N.." You tried to gain composure, not wanting to appear fragile in front of him. "What are you doing here ? I thought you didn't want to see me" you croaked, looking away coldly. You heard him sitting before you and took your cold hands. "Y/N I'm sorry. I've been a jerk, you didn't deserve this- I know my work isn't an excuse for acting this way, I understand if you don't want to talk to me or-" "Shut up..." you mumbled, suddenly feeling embarrassed as more people were staring at you two. "I will do everything for you to forgive me, really." he said seriously, not quitting your face from his gaze. Some people were whispering and gossiping, and the more they did, the more you felt ridiculous. You stood up quickly and went straight to the exit with your double cold latte with whipped cream, your boyfriend following you closely. "Are you crazy Park Seonghwa ??? Did you forget you're an idole ? Huh ?? What are you going to do if they recognise you ?" You began to yell but Seonghwa stopped you by taking your free hand and said clearly. "Then I will just say you're my girlfriend and that I don't care, cause you deserve way more than this. Beside being an idole I'm a man, and I love you, there's nothing wrong with this, and if they don't like it, screw them !" you were shocked by his fearless answer, and you felt your heart melt again. You were definitely madly in love with him.

Yeosang:

He was aware of his jerk attitude, and as much as he felt guilty, he didn't know how to ask for your forgiveness. The members already scolded him for what he had said earlier but he knew better than anyone that you weren't ready to talk with. You were the type to be angry for a while, not letting space for any peaceful conversation until you'd calm down. He overthought for a while, thinking you'd probably dump him now and he wouldn't see you ever again, or you'd be so mad at him you'd just beat his ass. Tormented, Yunho looked at his friend before saying, not really sure to mingle in his friend's love problems: "Yeosang, I'm not sure about her being mad, I think she's ...sad ?" he said cautiously, nervous about Yeosang's answer. Sad ? He was really dumb. Of course you'd not be mad, or at least not as much as sad. After all he saw you crying when you left, and his motto was all ruined at this moment. "You're right...I should go see her." he said flatly, feeling really bad. "Huh, yeah I don't even understand why you're still here to be honest" said Yunho with a smile. Thanks to him, Yeosang found the courage to go to your apartment, with your favorite pastry from the bakery you both liked to go, and...flowers. Yeosang wasn't the type to make such lovey dovey stuffs, but this time it was important. Inhaling deeply in front of your door, he knocked once, shyly, not sure if you'd hear it. Then he knocked more frankly before hearing footsteps from behind the door and before he knew it, you were standing in front of him as much surprised as he was. "...What are you doing here ?" you asked, rather coldly. He cleared his throat before handling you shyly the flowers. "I...I came to apologise. I've been a real jerk to you earlier...I even promised myself I'd never make you cry, but I failed miserably" he said in a go, probably too embarrassed to say it confidently. There is a silence, as you fix your eyes on your shy boyfriend. Suddenly you wanted to laugh. How laughable it was to see Yeosang acts like he never did before. You can't bear it anymore and just burst out of laugh, laughing so much that you have to hold your hurting belly. Visibly confused, Yeosang frowned a bit. Why were you laughing ? "Oh my god...You're really something else" you said, calming down slowly before taking the flowers. He suddenly lifted his head in hope. "Does it mean you're forgiving me ?" You faked you're still thinking about it, humming in an exaggerate way. "Well, only if you let me eat this" you nudged your chin to the box he was carrying and which you spotted immediately before he gave you the flower. He smiled and shook his head. "Alright, it's all for you then"

San:

He had definitely crossed a line he shouldn't had. After you slammed the door at his nose, he tried to make you open it for a while, but you never opened it again. So he left, defeated. It was supposed to be a romantic moment for both of you since a while, and yet he ruined everything with his mouth. Sometimes he wished he just could rewind and change every thing. Even if he didn't like the dress, he could have accepted it since you were happy, but his selfishness and jealousy got over it and now he was alone, in his car without you. He took his phone, sending you texts. "Babe, I'm sorry, please, you know I didn't really mean it right ?" or "Please answer me, I'm really sorry." etc, but you didn't even open them since they were still on sent. Instead of going back to his dorm, he tried to call you this time. On the fifth time, he let a voice mail, taking a long breath before the beep. "Y/N, I'm really sorry, I didn't want to ruin our date like this, or just ruin it at all. The truth is...you were so pretty in this dress, so sexy that I don't want other men to see you in this, I wanted to be the only one to see you with. You're not a whore, you're not any of this. I'm selfish I know, but please, it's been so long since we went on a date...If you still want to see me...I'll be waiting in front of your building." And he locked his phone, leaning his head on the top of the steering wheel. He didn't know how long he waiting again but he suddenly heard the door of the passenger side opening, making him look at the person who opened it. It was you. With the same dress. He felt his heart stopped as you sat next to him, putting your seatbelt without a word. "Y/N ?" You looked straightforward you, and said simply. "Let's go, I guess the restaurant is still open" you muffled. He couldn't help but smiled happily as he turned the engine on, taking your hand in his before driving and said. "Thank you Y/N, thank you" and kissed the back of your delicate hand.

Yunho:

Since the incident at the practice room, Yunho didn't hear from you for a while. Hongjoong particularly scolded him about how rude he's been on you while you just wanted to wish them good luck for their performance. He knew it right, but at the moment he couldn't have helped but get angry at you. He knew as well it wasn't so like him to get carried away for nothing, so that's why he didn't really know what to do to make amend for you. He made his mind he would apologise right after their stage for Kingdom even if they boys thought it would be better to do it before. He knew you'd definitely watch them, root for them so he put all of his mind and body in this performance, hoping it would bring him luck. And it did since they snitched 1st place although they started low in the classement. When the MC asked Yunho how he felt about their win, the giant boy just shyly smiled before saying with a trembling voice. "I...It meant a lot for us, and to be able to be first is huge honour. We always want to show our best to our fans, Atiny. But today I...wanted to surpass myself for a certain person." Others groups were chatting among themselves, surprised by Yunho's declaration. Changmin, though he was as surprised as the others still asked professionally. "Oh, who would it be ?" Yunho smiled brightly and said confidently. "Y/N, my girlfriend." Some screams and gasps from shock could be heard in the giant room after Yunho pursued: "She's always been by my side and supports me with the best way she can, but lately...I've not been a good boyfriend to her, that's why I wanted to win, for her, and saying that I love her."

Right after the diffusion of this week episode which you've been watching with your friends, you sobbed like a little girl. How proud you were for your boyfriend, and the only thing you wanted now was to take him in your arms, feeling his arms around you. With shaking hands you took your phone to try to call Yunho, but he wasn't answering your call. That's at this very moment you heard the bell of your door and went for it, not expecting to see your boyfriend at your door. "H-hi" he said shyly. You dropped your phone and jumped directly in his arms, crying again. "You're an idiot Jung Yunho...But I love you". He nuzzled the top of your head as he hugged you back tightly. "I love you too, little one."

Wooyoung:

wede Wooyoung always said honestly what he was thinking, and everyone's used to it, so he thought his remarks about your skill about cooking would pass easily, but he was wrong. At first he didn't understand your reaction, why you left like this as he was only joking, or he thought so. Seonghwa nagged at him after you left, saying how rude he's been and at least he could shut his mouth. He felt really guilty. He was the one who made you loose confidence about you, when he knew you're always trying your best. And this time, he really screwed things up. Worst than this, when he ate the cake you'd made, he realised it was really good, and his unfounded claims were really mean. Gathering his courage, he showed up at your workplace, waiting for you at the exit. At first, you didn't want to see him, you haven't digested yet what he'd said to you. But with an expressionless face, you finally appeared in front of him. "Y/N- listen, I'm really sorry, I shouldn't have said those horrible jokes. No, I mean, I didn't mean what I said, the cake was really good." he tried to say quickly, afraid you'd just brush him away. After listening to his words, you just sighed and said "You're really a jerk sometimes you know that ? Maybe I'm not good at some things, but it doesn't give you the right to bash me out like this in front of everyone. Do you understand Wooyoung ?" he looked down at his feet and nodded, muttering "I'm sorry". "Fine, if you're really sorry, you better cook something too" you smirked, a sign from you that you're half forgiving him. "What ? Wait-" he looked at you astonished. "I don't know what to cook" "Huh, well not my problem" you sticked your tongue out to him and caught his arm in yours.

Mingi:

Mingi's been aware that his words probably upset you. But he needed to find himself again, to get right on tracks by himself even if he was thankful towards you, taking care of him for so long and everything. But he felt like it was his duty to make his comeback to the team his, from A to Z. He hoped you would understand, but after you left him alone, he felt guilty to suddenly reject you. The first day of his comeback into the team, Mingi felt really nervous. He wished he could call you and talk to you as he used to, but since that day he didn't dare to contact you. Instead he sent you a long message, saying how much he missed you and felt really nervous. That he was sorry for what he's said and how much you counted for him. He knew deep inside his mind that you had understood his reasons to act this way, and he was right. After reading his text, you couldn't help but fall in love all over again for Mingi. He was so sweet and pure that you couldn't hold grudges against him. You texted back saying "Everything's gonna be alright. Fighting ! I love you" which reassured the rapper.

Jongho:

Although Jongho was the youngest from the team, he was really mature and hated childish behaviour when it comes for his relationship. The fact you got jealous and as a result, acted this way got him angry. For him, the fact he was dating you was a proof of his choice, and love. Things weren't bad with his ex, so he didn't see why he would cut the rope from her, and he expected you to understand his point of view. After calming down on his own, he also realised his reaction must not have been mature as well. He took more time to think about how he was going to reconcile with you, but things shouldn't stay this way. He expected you to be at your place, and directly knocked at the door, feeling nervous. "Y/N ?" he called out for you. It took a moment before you opened the door, clearly still furious about what happened earlier. "What ? Aren't you with Mina yet ?" you spatted out, maybe too agressive than you wished. Jongho took on himself not to react to this again, instead sighing softly. "Baby, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have reacted this way." he began, trying to be the most sincere he was. "You're the only one for me, you know it right ? But you see, Mina is indeed my ex, but it doesn't mean I'm on bad terms with her, and it also means that nothing will happen with her anymore. Because I love you so much and no one else"

[inkandpen22]

Permanent Chaos (4/?)

Pairing: MGK x Female!Reader

Word Count: 4k

Warnings: mild swearing

Part Summary: While Y/N is out shopping with Cara, news breaks that ties her with MGK. 

Masterlist

Masterlist

Two days later...

Cara and I go out shopping and have lunch for a girl’s day. I have yet to talk about the other night with Sam. Cara hasn’t mentioned it and I have no plans to either. Cameras have followed us up and down Rodeo Drive. By this point, Cara and I are both used to it. Carrying my bags however, I doubt I look graceful for these videos their taking. Oh well, they have fifteen thousand more of me.

“CARA! EXCITED TO WALK IN THE CHANEL FASHION SHOW?”

Cara ignores the paparazzi and points out a dress in the window at Dolce and Gabbana. I request to go inside to try it on. I’m not sure where I’d wear it to, but that doesn’t really matter.

“Welcome ladies!” A woman in a black dress approaches. “Can I help you find anything in particular?”

I point over to the dress in the window, “could I see that in a size six please?”

She leaves us to go find the dress for me and we roam around a small section while she does. My phone rings and I see Nicole’s name pop up. My heart immediately begins to race. She doesn’t call me unless absolutely necessary, usually we text. I step away toward the corner to be discreet.

I answer the call hesitantly. “Nicole? What’s up?”

“I got a call from Stephanie,” she sounds agitated on the other end.

Stephanie is my publicist, she handles everything that Nicole can’t basically. They bicker a lot since they’re both so headstrong and constantly need control. It’s the classic good cop/bad cop scenario, yet I don’t know who’s who. These two cover every aspect of my career, God bless them.

“Oh no, sounds bad,” I grumble anxiously.

“Depends how you look at it,” she lightens her tone.

“What is it?” I press.

“Well…” she hesitates.

“Nicole!” I drag out her name.

“It’s all over social media, magazines and it will be on TMZ tonight,” she stammers. “I’m surprised you haven’t already heard if I’m being honest-”

“Nicole! What?” I rush her.

“An article about you and Colson Baker just dropped on some gossip sight,” she explains. “It says that you and Colson Baker are dating. Stephanie and I figured no one would believe it but it’s everywhere! They have videos and photos of you two leaving The Ivy plus talking by Sam’s car. If I didn’t know you, I would be convinced.”

My head hangs low as I rub my forehead, letting out a deep sigh. “Oh dear God.”

“We can handle it, don’t worry!” Nicole assures. “This story will be gone soon!”

“I need to go, talk to you later!” I hang up on Nicole right when the woman shows me the dress.

“I’ll take it” I attempt to hurry up the process.

Cara comes up next to me “don’t you think you should try it on first?”

“I’ll explain later but we need to go” I whisper to her and just like that, she’s hurry the woman along at the register.

I have the dress and exit the store in a rush. I must act cool, the paparazzi will take notice of my mood change.

“HOW’S COLSON, Y/N?”

“SEEING HIM TONIGHT?”

“HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN DATING?”

“HOW ARE GONNA HANDEL HIS FANS?”

“HAS HE MET THE FAMILY YET?”

“What’s going on?” Cara asks concerned.

“I’ll explain once we’re somewhere private,” I whisper so the cameras don’t pick up on it.

We speed walk to the car and I offer to drive since I made us cut the day short. Once we’re on the highway towards home Cara asks what the heck is going on.

“Why did they keep asking about Colson?”

I turn on the radio and Elvis Duran, along with his team, are discussing no other than me and Colson.

Danielle summarizes the article for the listeners. “The article says they’ve been dating for the past few months. They’re very happy but the relationship is still new. The pair has not yet met each other’s families but Colson is going on tour soon so maybe Y/N will join him and eventually meet the family. Throughout, there are tons of photos of the cute young couple leaving The Ivy Wednesday night. There’s even a link to a video showing them, what appears to be, having a deep conversation by Sam Merka’s car. If you watch the video, the two are clearly looking at each other very lovingly. I mean, he’s looking at her the way I look at a fresh pizza!”

The rest of the cast laughs and I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Actually, scratch that, I can believe it. I’m just pissed.

“If MGK and Y/N are officially an item, why did she leave with Sam Merka?” Elvis questions.

“I’m glad you asked! According to sources, they’ve been very close friends since the start of TSL. In fact, the duo have taken many vacations together along with their co-star Penelope Glass.”

Cara turns down the volume and looks to me with a steady expression. “Is it true?”

I narrow my gaze at her in bewilderment. “What? No! There’s no way in hell!”

“Okay, just checking,” she lets out a sigh of relief.

“Never ever!” I add and change the station.

Colson Baker is everything I despise in a person. I’ve never hated someone so fast as I’ve hated him. Us together as a couple is impossible. It’s completely irrational.

_________________________________________________________

Later in the afternoon, Stephanie sets up a meeting for us to meet with Colson and his publicist. I had to drag myself to her office. My Fridays aren’t well spent in an office building with enemies. In fact, my whole day could be tarnished by this incident. The meeting room we’re all ushered into is freezing and I’m still in my sundress from earlier. Cara and I were never able to get lunch so I’m starving on top of being cold. The photos of us play in a slideshow on the meeting room’s tv. An endless cycle of false advertisement is how I see the photos. The media is selling us as something completely far from the truth. On top of everything, I’m in a meeting with the one guy in all of Los Angeles I can’t stand. Death would be less painful than the current situation. I tune out the debate between Stephanie and Colson’s publicist. He told me his name but my brain is so numb from the temperature in here I can’t recall it.

“Y/N!” Stephanie calls my name and I search for her around the room until I find her in the doorway with Colson’s publicist.

“We’re going to go make a few phone calls. You two will stay here while we handle the press.” I nod “sounds good.”

I send her a weak smile to charm her out of an apology for zoning out. She huffs and escorts Colson’s guy to her office so they can talk on speaker privately. I stand up from my office chair and stroll over to the windows overlooking the courtyard. I watch the cars zoom by on the street and businessmen and women shuffle in and out of the Starbucks below.

“If it means anything, I’m sorry,” Colson says quietly behind me.

I nearly miss it, he speaks so quietly. I lean against the wall, crossing my arms as I face him.

“You’re sorry?” I shrug, not really seeing his blame. “Why? It’s not your doing.”

I return my gaze to the chaos below us. I watch as people with office jobs travel about. I wonder if they’ve heard of me? I wonder if they like me or think I’m a stuck up actress? I shouldn’t care what people think, but it’s easier said than done. When millions watch TSL every week, it’s hard to ignore the wondering.

“If I hadn’t walked you to the car none of this would be happening,” Colson reasons guiltily.

I shake my head, finding humor in the situation now. The paparazzi can make nothing into a months long romance. A brief conversation outside a restaurant and suddenly we’re meeting each other’s families.

“We were only walking to a car. How could either of us have predicted the amount of attention that would come of us walking?” I justify, not to ease his mind, but my own.

My flicker over to the tv, I examine the slideshow of us. Examining the photos I realize it wasn’t all in my head, the way in which Colson was gazing at me is a tad bit gawk-like. Images of us walking to the car while I’m answering the paparazzi’s questions depict Colson glancing at me with what seems to be such admiration. A picture of when Cara calls for Colson comes up and I’m stunned by how we look. Even I appear to be in awe of him in return. It’s evident Cara is speaking yet neither of us react. We were so caught up within on another.

“I have one question!” I blurt out suddenly with my arms crossed I walk back over to the table. Just one and then I wish to put all of today’s events to rest.” Colson perks up and hums for me to continue. I point over to the photos on the screen “why did you look at me the way you did?”

Turning his head, he reviews the photos blankly and I wait anxiously for some sort of reason. “I’m not looking at you in any particular way,” he disregards my accusations.

I chuckle, amused by his horrible way of lying. “Lies!”

He’s thrown off by my reaction and I storm over to the TV screen to point it out to him.

“It’s clear as day to the press, the public and now me included. You’re clearly lost in some kind of thought! You were there, so was I and our friends! Say all the lies you want but you’ll never convince anyone.”

His jaw clenches and he avoids my gaze. He leans back in his chair, staring out the windows. “Colson,” I sigh, slowly approaching the table. “Maybe the truth could help the lies disappear! If we’re honest then maybe the press will leave us alone!”

He shakes his head low, letting out a brief laugh. “I highly doubt that.”

I have a thousand questions but I’m aware none will go answered. He’s a lost cause. I’m in this alone I guess. Turning my back to him I return to my position by the window. Observing the worker bees swarming around the spaces below. The sound of Colson’s chair rolling back comes from behind me but I don’t even shift. Out of the corner of my eye, I see his figure in the reflection of the window beside me. My attention remains outside. He won’t give me the time of day so why should I treat him any better?

“You wanna know why I looked at you the way I did?” His presence hovers of me and he feels like a wall surrounding me.

“Please,” I mutter a subtle beg.

 “I... I had this imagine of you in my head, pre-judgements. You’re supposed to be America’s Sweetheart, Little Miss Perfect! You told me you had been working for this for years, had drive and trails.” He confesses. “You’re not what I expected... It caught me by surprise is all.” 

My eyebrows furrow close, “So you thought I was just some pretty face, goody-two-shoes, ditz? If it’s because my image, my past, you said so yourself it doesn’t matter!” 

“No, no, that’s not it!” he runs his hand through his hair nervously.

Narrowing my eyes, I press further. “Why then?”

The door swings open and I straighten up before forcing a warm smile to my face. I step back from Colson before the person ever appears in the doorframe. One of Stephanie employees informs us that we’re free to go. Steph doesn’t want to keep me here all day and since I’m allowed to go Colson’s publicist is releasing him. I clasp my hand together, walking over to fetch my purse.

“Thank you so much!” I gush. “Have a good day and please tell Stephanie “thank you!””

The young intern eats up my pleasant expressions. “You too Miss Voss! Will do!”

The young woman shuts the door behind her and I return to the state I was in. Expressionless, I gather my belongings and Colson does the same. Checking my phone for any missed emails or calls I can tell he’s staring me down.

“Does it ever get tiring?” His tone is light, but I can hear the ounce of mockery beneath the surface.

My attention is locked on my phone as text after text pops up from Penelope. She’s more likely than not has seen all the articles and Twitter posts. I should call her and explain.

“Y/N!” Colson shout pulls my from my thoughts.

“Huh? Does it ever get tiring?” I restate his question back to him. “What exactly are we talking about?”

I slide my purse over my shoulder while stepping over to the door, leaving Colson behind. That is until he follows me.

“Your whole act.” He forces a fake smile and tosses imaginary hair over his shoulder. “The “happy go-lucky goody goody All-American girl?””

I scoff, eyeing him up and down. “You’re ridiculous. It’s not an act.”

I swing open the meeting room door, eager to leave here. My heels clink against the white shiny tiles on my walk to the elevators. After hitting the down button, I call up Blake now that I have some time to kill. She’s my oldest friend, I’m sure she sees right through all of the tabloids and is only checking in.

“Calling your boyfriend?” Colson mutters over my shoulder and I quickly move away.

“Don’t have one,” I answer plainly, waiting for Penelope to pick up.

He smirks and props himself up against the wall beside the elevator doors. I side eye him, all he does is smile all the time and he calls me out for acting so happy all the time.

“Can’t you find anyone else to annoy?”

He grins proudly, “sure I could. None would as entertaining as you though.”

“Geez,” I mumble under my breath.

I pace outside the elevators as I wait for one to arrive and for Penelope to answer. Classic of her to text me non-stop but not to answer when I call her back. The elevator doors open and I step inside, ready to get out of here. I hit the ground floor and Colson strolls in lazily not rushed at all. He checks the button and doesn’t add any. The doors shut then silence sits flat in the small space with us. My phone buzzes continuously, I check the name at the top of the screen.

“Frickin’ frackin’!” I clench my teeth together in a growl.

Colson’s eyes widen at my sudden explosion. Closing my eyes, I exhale to calm myself then bring the phone up to my ear. Smiling helps to fake enjoyment when talking to someone on the phone. Sometimes I can fool myself into thinking I’m not miserable during discussions.

“Finn!” I greet. “What’s new?”

My southern accent surfaces. I flip the switch whenever I speak to my family or friends back in South Carolina. I can’t have them thinking I’m not the same Y/N from Charleston. Colson eyes me with his eyebrows raised, surprised by my sudden transition. He makes fun of me in a whisper for my fake enthusiastic voice. I wack him on the arm and it only encourages him more.

“Hi ya Y/N, uh so ya prolly already know butcha face is everywhere along with this MGK fella...” Finn’s voice falters at the end.

I sigh and press my forehead to the wall. Finn asks me if any of what he has read is true and I instantly deny.

My tone goes timid, “who all knows?”

“Just us, Odelle, Greyson and Myself,” he assures.

A sense of relief rushes over me. I turn back around and Colson sends me a sympathetic look, it shocks me. Going from mockery to sympathy from him has my entire mood shifting.

“What ‘bout Momma or Daddy?” I ask, keeping eye contact with Colson.

“Nah, at least I don’t think they do,” Finn guesses. “I’m not entirely sure. Greyson is sayin’ they don’t. He’s the only one that’s home at the moment.”

“Heavens to Betsy,” I exhale deeply, looking up to the heavens. “Let’s hope to the high heavens they don’t. Thank you Finn.”

I go to hang up but he says one last thing. Bringing my phone back up to my ear I reply. “Sorry, missed that.”

My brother becomes stern on the other side, “do you and this guy spend tons of time together?”

I shift uncomfortably, preparing myself for the older brother advice I already see coming. “From time to time but I promise, we’re just friends.”

There’s a pause on his end, an unbearable pause. “I trust you Y/N,” Finn finally speaks. “It’s him I don’t trust. He’s not the best sort of guy. Ya’ll aint right for one another.”

I hope Colson can’t hear any of what Finn is saying. To keep him from becoming suspicious, I keep my replies indifferent. “Sure thing. Uh, talk ya later Finn.”

“Bye, talk to you soon.”

We hang up and I slip my phone into my purse.

Colson leans back onto the railing next to me. “Who was that?”

“My older brother, kinda overbearing,” I laugh nervously then bite my lip. My accent begins to subside again.

“I didn’t know you had a brother,” Colson remarks.

A faint smile appears across my lips thinking of my brothers. “I have two actually and an older sister. The order is Finn, Odelle, me then Greyson.”

Colson returns a kind and gentle smile. “That must’ve been nice to grow up with so many siblings.”

“It was.” I nod as memories flash across my mind. “Finn and Odelle were grouped together and so was me and Greyson since our age gaps are less.”

As we pass each level on the elevator there is a “ding.” Facing toward the doors again, I absentmindedly watch the numbers go down as we pass the levels. My mind wanders to the many memories I’ve made with my brothers and sister.

“Finn is about Sam’s age, so he likes to believe he’s almost a co-parent for me and Grey,” I describe with a pleased expression. “He’s the total opposite of Odelle.”

Colson genuinely shows interest, “how is she?”

“She’s a total wild card! We all joke that it’s every other kid. Finn and I are the rule followers. He was student body president, quarterback of the football team and still managed to graduate with honors. I’m nowhere near him on the perfect child spectrum but I’m supposed to be “America’s Sweetheart.” My parents eat that up. Then there’s Odelle, she’s the total opposite of Finn. My parents had to beg her to improve her grades so she could graduate. I remember being twelve, it was the middle of the night when I got up to get a drink. I went downstairs and saw her sneaking out of the backdoor. She made me promise not to tell our parents. I haven’t talked about it until today. There were days she’d fake being sick just to ditch school with her friends. By her senior year nothing had changed. She ended up graduating but my parents forced her to go to a college close to home so they could keep an eye on her. Her antics continued the entire time I was in high school. College for her was a playground. For some reason, I envied her. I still do. I suppose it’s because no one expects anything from her. She messes up, well, that’s Odelle for you. She causes trouble, just another day. For me, my parents have me up on a peddle stool. By the time I turned sixteen people out here started taking notice of me. When I reached seventeen the title of “America’s Sweetheart” popped up and from then on, I was longer a teenager. I had a role to play and an image to uphold. I could never make mistakes like Odelle. I have to be “perfect” constantly. Sometimes I feel like a doll, plastic. None of it is real.”

The bell rings for the floor. I comprehend the words escaping my mouth and snap back to reality. I revealed so much about myself while I was in that daze, private facts about myself that I’ve never spoken of before.

Straightening up and adjust my dress, I apologize. “I’m so sorry. I have no idea what came over me.” The doors slide open and I step out. “Good to see you Colson,” I rush out a farewell before speed walking towards the exit.

I mentally slap myself for all I confessed. If only Nicole found out, my head would be on a stick. My life, my background, every aspect of my being is supposed to be flawless. An All-American girl from South Carolina with a wholesome up brining is who I’m supposed to be. If word gets out that I’m not so perfect then… then I would be finished. My hand digs for my keys in my purse.

“Y/N! Wait up!” Colson jogs up next to me then steps in front of me, blocking my path.

“Colson, please....” I practically plead in a mutter, stepping around him.

He wraps his hand around my wrist, stopping me. “Let me buy you a drink!” 

Workers around us walk around in multiple directions like zombies. I wonder if they’re taking notice. Hesitant, I narrow my gaze at me. The reason we’re in this mess is because we were seen with one another.

“I don’t think that’s such a good idea,” I admit and release myself from his grip.

I only make it a few feet before he’s in front of me again.

“Fine, no to a drink! How about we go get some coffee? Or tea? If you prefer tea!”

His chest rises and falls rapidly, his desperation is evident. The reason behind is desperation is still unknown to me, along with the reason he looked at me the way he did last night. Who is this mysterious man who stands before me? So many questions I wish to ask but I can’t get passed his eyes. Puddles of crystal blue settle on a white canvas. Confused beyond belief, for a reason unbeknownst to me, I accept. Could be my curiosity is getting the best of me.

“Coffee it is,” I give in to his request.

He grins ear to ear and steps to the side so we can leave side by side. “Unless of course you prefer we get tea!” he suggests, sounding a tad nervous.

Honestly I like both drinks but I prefer coffee. He holds the door for me and the bright sunlight of California weather strikes me.

“Nah, I normally drink a cold brew with a shot of espresso,” I describe.

He winces and pretends to gag. “Ew! That sounds horrible!”

“It gives you a boost in the morning! Nice and strong!” I laugh.

“You’re nasty!” He waves his hands in disgust.

“Eh, you’ve called me worse,” I laugh, unfazed by his insult.

He chuckles, “you’re not wrong.”

Our laughing dies down a little as we stroll over to the Starbucks. I peer up at him with a side eye. When our eyes meet we begin laughing again uncontrollably.

___________________________________

Masterlist

Tags:  @canyoubuymetoast @bri-3530 @asil1652 @andstilltryingtofindmyself @nadia2021 @olafsidehoe @mgkobsessed @fairywriting101 @ferrell-cat @naylanae-0308 @tonystarkswife10 @alexsa56 @brocksbabyyy @stormrider505 @magnificenthumancopangel @sarcasticfangirlus @lilramencup95beech @missyviolet123 @skeleton-gxrl @glitterybearllamaflap @margaritaville20 @amoresixx @Thysagclub @hockeybabe87​ 

[lucy90712]

Karl jacobs- mr beast

wc- 2117

Warnings: none

~ Two weeks ago I randomly got a call from a man who invited me to a shoot for a video, believe me I was sceptical at first which the man seemed to understand but he provided me with all the information I could ever need and answered all of my questions so I believed him and agreed to go and now is the day of the shoot. To my knowledge there will be a few others there as well as a whole crew so if this is a bad situation at least I won't be alone.

My parents think I'm insane for going to this and they have made me promise to keep my phone on me at all times and to text them that I'm safe when I get there, it's nice that their worried but I honestly think I'll be fine. The friend that I've told seem to be thinking the exact opposite in fact they are convinced that I'm going to a mr beast shoot but I'm not too sure. They seem to think that because we live in North Carolina that this is the only possible explanation but I think that they would say that it was for mr beast so that the whole situation seemed less sketchy.

For the day of the shoot which happens to be today we were instructed to wear what we normally would but not to wear too much makeup because it doesn't look good on camera. I took this on board and wore my mom jeans with a black crop top just because it was plain and not too over the top, I don't want to stand out too much. I also barely put on any makeup I just covered the dark circles under my eyes and the few spots I had and I put on mascara so that I didn't look like I had no eyelashes.

The location I had to go to was only about 35 minutes drive from my house which was nice because I wasn't feeling a long drive today. I woke up early enough to have time to make myself breakfast and get coffee on the journey. At the local Starbucks drive through I got my usual order and talked to the girl at the window for a moment because she happens to be one of my friends sisters so we know one another.

"Isn't today the day if that mysterious video shoot your going to" she asked

"Yeah I have to be there in like 50 minutes" I said

"Well have fun meeting mr beast" she said handing me my drink

I rolled my eyes as I pulled away and started my drive. I listened to my Spotify playlist on the way just vibing to each song that played normally it plays at least one song that I'm not that into but today all of them were some of my favourite songs so I think today will turn out to be a good day.

As I arrived to the location I noticed that it was in this really random place with a bunch of big warehouses which I'm not gonna lie was a little sketchy but there seemed to be quite a few people about with cameras and other equipment so I calmed down again. I got out my car and went to the place that I was told to in the email which was relatively easy to find once I knew where the people were going and a guy led me into the middle of this warehouse with a few other people who were obviously taking part too.

Me and this one guy got talking while we waited and he seemed to know a little more than I did about what was happening so we talked about the video and this whole sort of experience. He was really cute too he had kind of long fluffy brown hair and lovely blue eyes that were and interesting shape but they really suited his face, I also noticed that he had his nails painted which made him seem even cooler much to cool for me to be talking to him. He was super nice to me and we had a good conversation until we had to start filming.

A few more people walked in with cameras following them as they talked but when they got closer I recognised the face and I couldn't believe it. My friends were right it was mr beast and his friends or at least a few of them. As they came in the guy I was talking to went over and joined them as they explained the video concept to the rest of us.

"Right for todays video we are going to get all these people to hide in pairs around these warehouses and whoever is found last wins $100,000 to share" mr beast explained

They sorted people into pairs but there was an odd number so I was left on my own.

"Slightly awkward but one person didn't turn up so Karl is going to step in and be y/n's partner for this" Chris explained

This Karl guy came over and he was the guy I talked to earlier, I got a bit embarrassed realising that I had absentmindedly been talking to this guy who's so well known as if it was nothing. The poor guy was probably so confused that I had no idea who he wasn't while at a mr best shoot hopefully I can redeem myself with this challenge.

We each took cameras to film as we found our hiding places which we had 10 minutes to go because the area we had was so big. Most people ran off to the furthest warehouses but me and Karl decided to stay a bit closer hoping that all the others would be found quickly. We went into this relatively small but tall looking warehouse which had a small upstairs bit to it where we looked for a good hiding place, there wasn't a whole load of options apart from this old wardrobe which looked like it could fit the both of us. We decided to keep looking seeing as we could always come back if we found no where else.

After checking another 2 warehouses that were almost empty we realised that our best option would be that wardrobe so we went back and squeezed ourselves in leaving one door open for now at least until we heard movement near by so that it wouldn't be quite as cramped. The both of us did fit in this wardrobe but on the inside it was smaller than it looked so we were pressed right against each other which would be awkward if you hadn't already embarrassed yourself in front of the person so I felt 10 times more awkward in this position.

We had to film ourselves which was quite hard with the darkness and the cramped space but Karl knew what he was doing so he took the camera off me and filmed the both of us explaining where we were showing just outside the wardrobe so that the viewers would know when the others were close to finding us.

Soon enough the timer went off indicating that our hiding time was up and now we really had to be careful not to make too much noise as we could've found any second I had kind of forgot about the fact that this was for a whole lot of money up until now because I was just so annoyed at myself for being such an idiot but now it felt really real and I was starting to feel quite competitive.

We waited what felt like an age before we heard any movement but when I heard the door open I almost jumped out my skin because it was so quiet up until that point. I gave Karl a look and the both of us forced ourselves further into the wardrobe and shut the door as quietly as we could making it completely pitch black.

It was a lot more squished in the wardrobe now as there was no space to move, there was no good way to stand because we had to had some part of our bodies touching or else we wouldn't fit. Karl whispered telling me to turn my phone touch on so that he could film for a second because he said that it wouldn't be seen from outside.

"We just heard the door open and there is movement downstairs so the door in now closed and its super dark without the light" Karl explained to the camera

"It's also super claustrophobic in here with the door shut" I added putting my head over his shoulder so that the camera could see me

He put the camera down and I turned off my touch and we just kind of listened and we heard the door close again or so we thought but it wasn't worth the risk so we left it a little longer before we felt safe to be a little louder but we didn't want to risk opening the door again so we stayed how we were.

It was actually a good time talking a little bit like we were before the filming started, Karl is a very sweet guy he really just wants to get to know me as a real person and not just someone helping him do his job. He seemed to really care about what I did with my life and who I am seeing as I know a bit about him and he knew that he was interested in learning about me.

Our nice conversation was soon interrupted when the door opened again and we heard voices getting closer to us. The sound of the metal stairs that lead to where we are could be heard which meant that they were close. There was a panicked feeling between the two of us and Karl pulled me closer to him just incase they opened one door they might not be able to see us.

"They could be in the wardrobe there" I heard a muffled voice say

Mine and Karl's breathing slowed down so that they couldn't hear any noise at all and if they did well they have great hearing. It was at this point that I realised Karl had his arm around my waist holding my back to his chest which was making me blush but it was dark so no one could see. The door opened on the other side and a camera was pointed in.

"There no one in this side do you really think they would both fit on the other side?" Someone asked

"I don't think so honestly but we really should check" another said

I knew it was over from that point and I was right the second door opened and cameras went straight into my face, Karl also let go of my waist at this point not wanting that to be on camera. Karl got out the wardrobe and offered his hand to help me out.

"Congratulations you guys have won" mr beast said

"It took us forever to find you so well done" Chris said

"Oh my this is amazing thank you" I said feeling quite overwhelmed

Obviously the prize for winning was $50,000 each which was absolutely amazing and just so life changing like there is so many things I could do with that amount of money but I have no idea what that will be yet.

"You have won $50,000 congra" mr beast started

"Wait I want y/n to have my share I don't need it" Karl interrupted

"Karl there is no need for you to do that I'm more than ok with $50,000" I said

"You are taking the money please it would make me happy" he said

I accepted the fact that Karl was never going to give in so now I'm $100,000 richer which is insane no one is going to believe me until this video comes out. My parents are going to think I've committed a crime of some form which isn't good but they will have to believe me eventually so it's fine.

The shoot wrapped up and I was heading to my car to go back home when Karl came running over and gave me his phone number saying he wanted to hang out sometime. What has my life become? I started the day thinking that I could be in danger and have ended it with $100,000 and the phone number of one of the people that works for a huge YouTube channel, it's almost like a dream.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 300: Days of Our Todorokis

Previously on BnHA: Hawks was all “hey Jeanist, wanna go on a road trip with me to my mom’s house?” Jeanist was all “you know it,” and so they hopped into Jeanist’s jercedes and took off. Hawks took a nap and had a flashback to his Dickensian childhood living in a abject poverty with his jerk mom and jerk dad, thinking heroes were make-believe until one day Endeavor arrested his dad and Baby Hawks was all “OH SHIT.” And then he saved a bunch of people, and the HPSC was all “what do we have here,” and blah blah blah, you know the rest. Back in the present, Hawks was all “well my life is currently in shambles, but on the plus side there’s no one bossing me around anymore so that’s pretty cool,” and then decided he was going to talk to Endeavor. Fandom was all “I can’t believe Hawks would side with his childhood hero over the man who burned his wings off and posted a video calling him a violent murderer who took after his abusive dad,” so that was fun and stuff. I can’t wait to see what piping fresh takes this new chapter will bring.

Today on BnHA: Our old friend Carbonation Carl tries to loot a Starbucks and gets his ass kicked by a senior citizen. Society is all “YEAH, WE’RE REALLY STARTING TO GET SICK OF THIS SHIT.” Old Man Samurai is all “this room won’t stop me because I can’t read it” and abruptly decides to retire, which, fun fact, is literally THE LEAST HELPFUL THING ANYONE HAS EVER DONE. Anyway so then a bunch of other punkasses follow suit, and while I won’t say that I’m actually starting to root for Stain to kill some peeps, just for the record I’m not not saying that either. Back in the hospital, Endeavor cries some tears because his life sucks, and then is confronted by his entire family, LED BY QUEEN REI, FIRST OF HER NAME, BACK IN BUSINESS AND LARGE AND IN CHARGE. Rei is all “fuck feeling sorry for yourself, we have a rogue Murder Son on the loose” and I swear to god I have never felt so alive.

so here we go! and just for the record, even though the last two chapters have been phenomenal, I don’t necessarily have any sky-high expectations for chapter 300, mostly because chapters 100 and 200 consisted of Mei Boobs, and Toadette and her horrific quirk lmao. so go ahead Horikoshi, what are you gonna pull out of your hat for this one

oh, back to this stuff again. sob

I guess there was only so much time we could spend having hospital antics and exploring Hawks’s past before we got back to dealing with the whole “the world has gone to absolute shit” issue huh, lol

omg

what’s with these bizarrely cute Noumus. why do I want to pet them

so the narrative text is going on about how people have been super paranoid about the Noumu ever since the USJ incident a year ago. so yeah, I guess the fact that there are now a bunch of them confirmed to be running around is really freaking people out even on top of everything else

wtf is happening here

what did this poor lil glass ever do to anyone. r.i.p.

OH MY FUCKING GOD

SODA SAM IS BACK ON THE LAM

tsk tsk tsk. my man has graduated from snatching purses to raiding cafes. going after that big money. this man has no business sense whatsoever lmao

OH BUT WATCH IT NOW!!

OH SNAP THE PEOPLE ARE FIGHTING BACK. WHATCHA GONNA DO NOW SAM

THIS MAN IS 172 YEARS OLD AND HE’S NOT HERE TO PLAY GAMES!!

WTF IS HE LIGHTING THIS THING ON FIRE OR SOME SHIT. GETTEM GRANDPA YEAHHHH HE’S CHARGING AT EM YEAHHHHHH

lmao so that was fun. and now we’re cutting to Wash!! omg. look at him

he’s so dedicated. too bad you don’t have a car like Best Jeanist. probably takes a while when you’re just running everywhere

you see?? you were too slow!!

NOOOO, GRANDPA. he defeated Pepsi Pete, but lost his life in the process. this is too tragic

anyway so the good news is that the cafe has been saved! but the bad news is, there really isn’t much of a cafe left. huh. I guess that’s one of the reasons why people are supposed to get a license to use their quirks like this

oh snap and now everyone is coming outside, and they’re none too happy to see poor old Wash over here

seriously Wash, get a bicycle or something. also the way this guy is gesturing so dramatically with his hand in this sort of “YOU SEE!! YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENS!!” manner is sending me

OH MY GOD

HE SPEAKS. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS. IT MEANS JEANS PUNS ARE YESTERDAY’S NEWS, FOLKS!! MAKE WAY FOR THE LAUNDRY PUNS. CAN’T WAIT TO WATCH THIS ALL... UNFOLD

“the heroes had dwindled away” okay real talk you guys, it is literally only a matter of time before they press-gang the children into picking up their slack. I still don’t know how to feel about that, but it is happening one way or the other regardless. Child Soldiers 2 Electric Boogaloo. wonder if we’ll see a rise in vigilante action as well

OHO WHAT’S THIS? THIS IS A CHAPTER OF GRANDPAS HUH

-- no fucking way

WOW. WOW. WOWWWWWW

wow. so he didn’t do a fucking thing while the rest of the top ten were being turned into red mist in the previous arc, and now that it’s all over and they need his help more than ever, he decides... THAT IT’S TIME TO RETIRE. holy shit. “fuck you” doesn’t even begin to cover it my guy. you stand there and soak up those boos you coward

ohhhhhhh shiiiiit you guys. oh shit

the “I am not here” breaks my fucking heart for real though y’all. oh man. everything he worked for is gone just like that

(ETA: okay so a couple of the takes I’ve seen on this make it seem like All Might is somehow the bad guy here?? “this is what happens when society puts a bunch of glorified cops on a pedestal”, “finally the cracks in hero society are showing”, etc. etc. so, just a friendly reminder that this isn’t happening because of too much trust and a lack of critical thinking; this is happening because the villains killed all the heroes and broke a bunch of murderers out of jail. it’s happening because an organized league of terrorists succeeded in terrorizing, and so society is now understandably awash in fear and panic. like, it’s just wild to me that AFO is RIGHT FUCKING THERE, and yet week after week fandom still has their “IT’S ALL THE HEROES’ FAULT” signs still up on their lawns. BUT WHATEVER, MOVING ON.)

also though, so exactly how much time is passing here now? I wanted to go straight back to the hospital and see what happens with Deku and the Todorokis. please don’t tell me we’re jumping ahead sob. my aaaaangst

OH SHIT

STAIN. LISTEN UP BUDDY. I KNOW WE’VE HAD OUR DIFFERENCES, AND I STILL DESPISE YOU FOR CRIPPLING TENSEI AND TRYING TO KILL MY BEST BOY TENYA. BUT AS IT HAPPENS, THERE ARE ONE OR TWO OTHER HEROES OUT THERE NOW WHO I WOULDN’T MIND YOU PAYING A VISIT I’M JUST SAYING

LOL BUT IT ACTUALLY ISN’T THIS MAN, FFFFFF

sob. yeah I was talking about Old Man Samurai actually but YEAH. HEY THERE ENJI

also is this entire hospital actually run by characters from Super Mario Bros though. first Yoshi and now this guy, come the fuck on that is not a coincidence

lmao they stuck him in another one of these cavernous creepy hospital rooms

wtf is it with Horikoshi and these giant fucking rooms lately. Kacchan’s in chapter 298, then Tomie’s colossal house furnished with like one table and a TV, and now this. and the weirdest thing about it though is that “huge space with nothing to fill it up” is like the exact opposite of what you’ll usually find in Japanese homes lol

so now Enji is just sitting there thinking things like “my head is fuzzy” and “I’m alive” lmao okay. not quite all there yet, huh. I’ll give you a minute

I’m so fucking curious as to who his first visitor is going to be omg. either way it’s going to be interesting af, and either way fandom is probably going to feel some way about it but OH WELL

okay now his thoughts are getting more coherent! and he’s remembering Touya, and feeling regret for freezing up and forcing Shouto to deal with everything instead

!!! OH HERE GOES BRACE YOURSELVES Y’ALL IT’S ABOUT TO GET SPICY

NO TOUYA PLEASE DON’T CRY HONEY NO PLEASE

ohhhhhhh man

okay, I mean I didn’t expect you to, but so instead then you’re just going to do... what? lie there and wallow in regret and self-pity for the rest of your life? son you know that’s not how we deal with our problems here in Shounen

though also, I totally do get it though. honestly, thinking on it, I probably would have been disappointed with any other response. but so this is where the rest of his family (including his adopted son) come into play now though, because like it or not they’re all in this thing together. and so friends, I am once again asking you WHO IS GOING TO BE THE ONE TO VISIT ENJI FIRST

AHHHHHHH

KRANCH!!!! OMG AND THE OTHERS ARE SO TINY NEXT TO HIM THAT I ALMOST DIDN’T SEE THEM AT FIRST. IT’S BECAUSE THEY’RE TWENTY MILES AWAY ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THIS REGULATION HOCKEY RINK OF A ROOM

holy shit I’m so excited lkjlklhlglkasdsjldfk

SDKFJLSKHLKJL

the way she has him by his collar lmaoooo. “lol nah you’re not going anywhere pal.” damn straight, siblings have to be ride or die in situations like this. banding together for survival. strength in numbers

OH MY STARS I’M JUST WARNING YOU NOW THAT I’M ABOUT TO DISSECT EVERY LAST REMAINING PANEL OF THIS CHAPTER PROBABLY YOU GUYS. WE COULD BE HERE A WHILE

love how Fuyu has absolutely no idea how to segue into THE SINGLE MOST AWKWARD CONVERSATION SHE’S EVER HAD, so she just GOES FOR IT in pure small talk mode like they’re meeting up for brunch somewhere

I KNOW IT’S A SMALL THING, BUT I APPRECIATE THAT THE FIRST THING ENJI ASKS IS WHETHER THEY’RE OKAY

lastly while I can’t wait for more of this delicious Natsu angst, I also just have to say that Enji has as much reason to cry right now as anyone on the planet. you can’t deny that being confronted by your not-dead-but-you-thought-he-was-dead son who’s all “SURPRISE DAD I GREW UP TO BE A MASS MURDERER AND I HATE YOU AND EVERYTHING IS ALL YOUR FAULT AND NOW I’M GONNA MAIM YOUR OTHER KID” with a side order of “EVERYONE HATES YOU AND SOCIETY IS CRUMBLING AND NOTHING WILL EVER BE GOOD EVER AGAIN” is enough to bum pretty much anyone out. there’s a Pagliacci the Clown joke here somewhere. BUT DOCTOR, I AM THE NUMBER ONE HERO

oh man lol he is seriously falling apart

damn. like you guys, I’m sorry, go ahead and cancel me, but I do feel compassion for the man. it’s therapeutic for me to see an abuser actually feel remorse and be truly sorry and want to change and want to make it up to his family. and it’s also compelling as fuck to read a narrative about a family that’s trying to grapple with that, because let me tell you straight up, as someone who’s done a version of that song and dance -- it is exhausting. it is a piping hot mess. it’s a gigantic mishmosh of extremely volatile emotions that all somehow all contradict one another. love, hurt, hope, anger, betrayal, resentment, attachment, longing. it’s something you can both be desperate for and also want nothing at all to do with. and attempting to portray all of that and write about it is a monumental task, and one which Horikoshi has done so, so delicately thus far, and damn but I appreciate it. anyway, so I’m here and I’m ready for my latest helping of Todoroki Fam Feels you guys

GASP

oh man. OHMANOHMANOHMAN. CAN IT REALLY BE. IS THIS THE REDEMPTION ARC OF CHAPTERS 100 AND 200???

LMAO SHE’S ALL “WE ALL FEEL BAD YOU JACKASS STOP CRYING ABOUT IT”

LAY INTO HIM REI!! SORRY ENJI YOUR PITY PARTY HAS BEEN CANCELLED IN FAVOR OF A “SO WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT” PARTY COURTESY OF QUEEN ELSA OVER HERE. THE PEOPLE TOOK A VOTE AND WE WANT LESS WHINING AND MORE ACTION

oh my god look at this lady folks

NOTE THE HAIR BLOWING IN THE NONEXISTENT WIND. NOW WE KNOW WHERE SHOUTO GOT THIS POWER FROM

(ETA: btw guys, seeing Rei handle this crisis like an absolute champ despite everything she’s been through is everything, though. I’m reminded of Hawks’s line last week about people sometimes unexpectedly finding liberation when they’re backed into a corner. like things may be shit but goddammit her kiddos need her.)

THE CHAPTER IS ALREADY ENDING SOB, IT’S ONLY A 17-PAGER THIS WEEK, BUT GODDAMN WHAT A WAY TO CLOSE

oh my god. oh my god oh my god. AND FUCK YOU HORIKOSHI FOR CUTTING IT OFF THERE sob. it’s like each week the wait for the next chapter becomes more painful. the Todofam is about to get real, and on top of that Hawks is gonna crash the party at some point down the line, and on top of that we’re still waiting for Kacchan to have his own heartfelt discussion about What The Fuck Are We Supposed To Do Next with his best friend who’s currently in a coma. all I want to do with my life is read about these three things, and all I can do is simply wait as they are portioned out in agonizing, addicting little installments every week

anyway! tune in next time as we answer the question of whether or not fandom will finally run its train of logic all the way through to its natural conclusion and somehow manage to cancel Noted Abuse Apologist Todoroki Fucking Rei. don’t act like it can’t happen. you all know nothing is sacred lol. anyways but I’m ready for anything lol, bring it