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aka-ashi-keiji · 4 years ago

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Bittersweet

Akaashi Keiji

soft angst, unrequited love

a/n: this was for a school assignment lmao but i really really enjoyed writing it, even though love stories are def not my forte :(( but angst definitely is, so enjoy!!

Keiji, such a beautiful name. This was the name of someone who you held so closely to your heart, but weren’t necessarily as close to his. Despite this fact, the fondation in which your friendship was built off of will always overpower your sense of heartbreak as you realize that not all the feelings you feel for Keiji are reciprocated. The earliest memories your mind encapsulated revolved around the amount of time you spent with him as a child. Your mothers being best friends and your houses set on the same street, you each had a “built in best friend”, as your parents would like to tell you. And it was true, he was your best friend all through the enjoyable years of grades kindergarten to fifth. As well as staying through the hell bound years of grades six to twelve.

The core memories accumulated through the daily interactions between you two, stood out so brightly in your mind even years after graduation. Racing each other down hills even though those races always ended with either you or both of you with scraped knees. the scars still graced your skin and were visible under the skirt you wore to your office job day in and day out. Spending time sat in the shade provided by your house, in the backyard as your backs faced each other. On these days of your early preteen years, Keiji would bring you a new book every time, insisting that you would adore it. You nearly always did, and when you think about it now you’re not entirely sure if you truly did like these books, or if you just adored the person sitting with his back to yours as he read the same set of words.

Despite whether you adored the books or if you adored him subconsciously, this admiration soon became a conscious thought that consumed your entire being. It all started with the garden of flowers that grew near the back door. Tiger lilies, roses, tulips, all varieties of each end of the color spectrum, definitely the second most beautiful thing that took part of Keiji’s household. The first being obvious, but nonetheless beautiful. But one specific flower soon had woven its roots of beauty and simplicity into your mind. Forget-me-Nots were simple, easy to overlook, kinda like Keiji and yourself. But when examined closely, they were completely immersed with beauty. Or, that’s what he would tell you everytime he handed you a bundle of these precious plants. Every morning since fourth grade, you would walk with Keiji to school. Every single one of these walks began the same. Around when you both were first years in high school, you finally asked.

“Why do you give Forget-Me-Nots every morning?”

To which he replied with, “Maybe if I give you them enough, you’ll never forget me.”

At this point in time, you had become conscious of the romantic feelings you had for keiji, but you could see it in the way he looked at you and in the way he gazed at the girl who sat next to you in English. His eyes weren’t tainted with the same love you felt for him, his eyes only became tainted when they were focused on her.

You had read about this, the emotion of something much worse than a breakup. Unrequited love. The concept only existed in stories you read with the person who manifested this fictional feeling into your reality. But that feeling started to dull as his closeness started to become tainted just as your eyes had been for so many years. This had started your third and final year of high school, after the girl you sat next to in english had dumped him on his birthday. You were at that party, you watched it happen, You watched as she laughed with another the next day, while Keiji wept into your shoulder. You had never seen such genuine and painful tears spring from his beautiful dark blue eyes. His eyes were no longer tainted with that love, but instead flowed through to his actions.

He started to linger longer after walking you home, bringing books over ‘just because’. He stayed for dinner now on the days where he would normally be out on a date, and not just on the weekends like before. Everything that unrequited love had taken from you, was now slowly making its way back into your life. The taint that still clung to your eyes seemed to force yourself to see the same emotions through his actions. Maybe this unrequited love was finally starting to go both ways. You knew in the back of your love sick brain that you were just being hopeful, and that he most likely was just being himself and his love was still only platonic. But a heart that had been bruised so many times can only handle the bleeding inside for so long.

Your emotions had begun to spur your actions, linking your arms with his in the halls at school, legs over his lap as you both read on the couch, the grazing of your knuckles when you two walked too close together. He too, mimicked these habits. His head finding its way to your shoulder as you two studied, squeezing your hand when he sensed your unease, and even the smallest glance of his daring eyes seemed to hold yours for a second longer than would be comfortable, but it was comfortable with him. Even though the words never came from Keiji’s lips, you could’ve sworn you felt them with every move. I love you too.

One day however, your feelings became too great to live in your mind. The love that manifested in fourth grade in his backyard was finally going to be voiced and accepted into the world. This day was like any other school routine, but the excitement and nausea was the catch. You waited patiently to hear Keiji’s strong but subtle footsteps come into earshot as you waited on your porch. Once they had, your heart nearly pulled you to his side, the giddiness concerning Keiji.

“Are you alright? Are you cold, you're shaking.” He asked quietly as he began to take off his uniform blazer. Oh only if he knew. He placed it over your shoulders and began to reach back to the side of his school bag as you softly thanked him. What happened next was something so completely normal, but it still made your cheeks dust pink everytime. And today was no exception. He held out a single bundle of the precious flowers, his soft subtle smile gracing his face. You smiled back brightly as you took them, and with that you started your commute.

You nervously picked at the stems as you fought the urge to just blurt out your confession. You nearly decided against it, but you shook your head as you promised to go through with it. You owed it to yourself, after all the years of pain you unnecessarily had put yourself through. And even though you knew you had to come clean, you still feared that maybe this was just a side effect of a love sick brain and a heart damaged by an emotion you read in a teen fiction book in seventh grade. But that taint in your eyes never left and it remained glossy as ever. So as your steps fell in time with Keiji’s, you spoke.

“I like you”

He slowed down a bit and turned his head to see you staring at the gift he had given you. “What?” You both had stopped in your tracks now. Slowly but surely, your eyes connected to his and with one look, the taint had spread through your body and infected your heart.

“I like you, or actually I love you.” You stammered out, the weight that sat so heavily on your head and heart finally receded. But soon returned as the air around Keiji was filled with silence. “That’s what I wanted to tell you.” You spoke again, hope filling your voice. You smiled at him as his eyes had suddenly become a shade darker.

“Oh.” One word, that’s all you got. And that one word shattered the taint that covered your heart, and bruised it once more.

“Oh?” you questioned, silently begging for more of an answer. Hoping for the answer you wanted. But you knew you wouldn’t get. His eyes still bore into yours, your smile fading along with any hope of this going the way your feelings had told you it would.

After the few seconds that felt like eons, his explanation finally fell from his lips. The words gentle, but still sharp enough to draw blood.

“Y/n look, y’know I care about you and I’ll always be your best friend but it’s just that-”

You cut him off, you knew what he was about to say and if he said it, it would’ve split your heart in two. You saying it didn’t dull the damage as much as you hoped.

“You still love her, huh?” You asked quietly, your heart pumping adrenaline into your veins, every muscle in your body working together to keep tears from falling. You didn;t want the answer even though you already knew it. You knew it from the start, you knew that fictional emotion wasn’t fiction and unfortunately, it was permanent. But you couldn’t blame yourself, you were sick, too love sick for your own good. And something you wished that book had told you, was that unrequited love could be deadly.

A single nod was all it took. And when you think about that day now, you remind yourself that you should really listen to the thoughts that stick around long enough. The thoughts that don’t deter even when you have the strongest of feelings. You didn’t know how to feel, or what to say. In all honesty, what could you do? So you did the one thing you had mastered over all these years, you hid your true feelings.

“Okay, that’s alright!” You said brightly, beginning to walk once again. His steps fell in time with yours, and he even tried to apologize, apologize for being honest. But you assured him that it was okay, that you two were okay. You couldn’t be mad, but that didn;t stop you from being broken. It was true, your friendship continued as always, never letting the side effects of unrequited love over power the strength of the love manifested in your friendship.

You both soon graduated, promising to keep in touch. And that you did. You both began to travel quite a lot after university, your jobs moving you all around the globe. But the tradition of the flowers that grew in Keiji’s backyard never ceased no matter the distance. They may have not shown up everyday, but they made their way to you on most occasions.

On one very specific day, the day your first company launched, the bouquet of the dainty little flowers made their way to your office desk. However this time, they came with a note.

“You didn’t forget me yet did you? I always knew you’d do great things. Congratulations y/n, come visit soon. I have some new books I think you’ll adore.

- K.”

You could never forget him, you couldn’t ever forget Keiji even if you wanted to. The memory of him brought you back to that emotion that only existed in the fiction books you read in seventh grade. It wasn’t fiction, it was most definitely and undeniably real. Unrequited love was bitter, but with Keiji it was also sweet. And that’s something you could never forget.

************************************************

a/n pt. two: as an akaashi simp and stan this hurt my heart.

part two is under construction :))

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lilywoood · 5 years ago

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Hesitate 1/2

Okay I swear that I’m gonna work on the last prompt but I had to write that short buddie story, that one wouldn’t leave me either, I hope y’all like it

Tagging : @diazbuckleysworld @felicitous-one @cherishingstydia @translucent-bisexual @gxtop

Words count : 940

Song : Let me down slowly- Alec Benjamin

——————————————————————-

{Hanahaki} def : Hanahaki is a disease born from unrequited love, the patient throat would be filled with petals or in advanced state with flowers, there is no known cure for it....

—-

The first time Buck felt It he was talking with Eddie in the locker room, they were both getting changed for the beginning of their shift, Eddie was telling him about how Lena and him were trying to mend their relationship, how they started to hang out together when he felt an itchy feeling in his throat, it was unpleasant and he couldn’t stop trying to clear his throat.

-Everything ok, Eddie had asked him with concern.

-Yeah, he’d responded reassuringly, maybe I’m starting to caught the flu, he shrugged closing his locker.

-I hope no, Eddie smiled closing his locker, we’re already one man down, he chuckled leaving the room.

The itching got worse after Eddie’s departure, he was afraid it was the clot coming back even though he was still on blood thinner, he soon found himself coughing without being able to stop, the metal taste on the back of his throat, he coughed one last time and felt something sticky falling in his hand...

He was shaking, afraid to find a piece of his lung in his hand, he was surprised to see that it was a petal, a white petal tainted by a little drop of blood, he never questioned where it came from, thinking that maybe he swallowed it when he went to botanic garden with Maddie the day before, he shrugged cleaned his hand and rejoined the rest of his team the incident long forgotten...

————

The second time it happened it was just after the tunnel incident, he was talking with Eddie, sharing his worry over Bobby when the older man’s started to ring Lena’s name appearing, the itching came back this time it was more unpleasant, more painful, Eddie was busy talking and laughing with Lena to notice Buck’s struggle.

He was coughing again, his breath was short, and he knew, he knew that if he opened his hand again he would find it a tainted white petal... Except that this time they were three petals...

-You sure everything is ok, Eddie asked him on their way back to the station, I saw you coughing, he added, you weren’t exposed to the radiation, he frowned.

-No, Buck waved dismissively, it’s just asthma, he lied, you know with the smoke and all, he pointed, don’t worry I’ll ask Maddie to check me, he smiled bumping their shoulders.

————

The fifth time it happened he was with Maddie, Eddie had accidentally sent him a text meant for Lena, the kind of text he secretly hoped to receive one day, quickly after Eddie sent him an apology text.

That when he felt the itching again, this time it was twice harder than in the tunnel, it was more painful than in the locker room, he felt like a thousand knives were stabbing him in the chest, he had trouble breathing, and his vision started to darken.

He heard Maddie rushing to him, felt her catching him, he never acknowledged her to busy admiring the white and red lilies in the palm of his hand.

-Evan, Maddie sobbed, forcing him to sit down, she grabbed his face making him look at her, since when, she breathed

-Two months, Buck whispered, what is wrong with me Maddie, he chocked, why do I feel like dying, he asked brow furrowed.

-Because you love him, Maddie explained stroking his cheeks,

-Do you think it will stop hurting, that I will be okay one day, Buck asked letting himself be embraced by Maddie

-You’ll be okay but the hurting...she half shrugged smiling sadly, the hurting it never stop you just grew accustomed to it, Maddie lied hugging him tighter.

Maddie felt helpless, she didn’t know what to say, didn’t know what to do, it was a first for her, she’d heard about it, read about it in books but she never ever imagined that she would witness it one day, never though her own brother would have Hanahaki....

—-

Buck state worsened after that day at Maddie’s, he was coughing flowers now, not just petals, the sole thought of Eddie made him sick, just hearing him talk about how great Lena was, about what they did over the weekend or how Christopher warm up to her was enough to provoke the cough.

It’s been four months now and he was more tired and sick than ever, he just wanted it to be over, wanted the pain to cease, wanted to be normal again.

-Maddie, he called lying his head on her laps.

-Yes Evan, she responded massaging his scalp.

-The hurt it’s never stop, he stated, I’ll never get used to it, he croaked, I’ll never get better, he added.

-There is a way, she sighed stopping her movements, but I don’t think you’ll want it, she admitted.

-What way, he demanded looking at her with tired eyes.

-You’ll have to surgically remove every feelings you have for him, she explained, by doing so you’ll also forget Chris, she smiled tearfully.

-What happens if I don’t, he pressed, if I decide I won’t remove him, he precise, won’t remove them, he whispered.

-Don’t make me say it, Maddie croaked, please Evan don’t make me say it, she started to cry, think about it Evan please, she prayed.

-I’ll think about it, he murmured, even if my choice is already made, he stated turning his attention back to the TV.

#buddie whump #buddie angst #buddie fic #miscommunication #hurt comfort #buddie #buck x eddie #eddie x buck #evan buckley #eddie diaz #911fic #911 on fox #tv: 911 #911onfox

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hearticho · 5 years ago

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GL manhwa recs

This summer I’ve been reading a lot of gay comics. Some American, some Japanese, but mostly Korean! I will try to list as many content warnings as possible and try to avoid giving too much away. I hope you enjoy the manhwas as much as I did! :)

Also… please, please, please PAY the original artists as much as you can, whether you read the official or unofficial translations. If you find that it’s difficult to navigate a certain site (even with google translate turned on), you might be able to find fan-made how-to-pay guides for non-Korean speaking people. It’s really important that we give money to people in our community and support queer art, even if that means saving a little extra or paying at a later time.

EDIT: I tried to change a tag and somehow deleted the WHOLE POST. I had to recreate everything under the line by memory 😭

Moonlight Garden // 월야화원 by Kang Unnie and MissPM

Content warnings: NSFW (a lot of sex and a lot of naked ladies), child abuse (a couple flashbacks about branding) and past child slavery, violence, blood, death

NSFW: About 10% of the story has graphic sex scenes, but the sex scenes were all connected to the plot. It’s also kind of expected since it’s set in a brothel lmao

Plot: There were a lot of moving parts (love triangle, politics, backstories), but you’ll get the hang of it. The extra focus needed was well worth it bc the ending was super satisfying

World building: Learning about the flower maidens was so interesting!!! Probably my favorite part of the manhwa. I felt like all of my questions were answered while reading

No men: There were some gossiping male guards and fathers in flashbacks, but for the most part, the men are absent and nameless

Art: GORGEOUS!!! They had coloring assistants and it SHOWED. There was a sweetness to the art style

Rating: 10 out of 10 peach blossoms and blue roses

Blooming Sequence // 블루밍 시퀀스 by Lee Eul

Content warnings: mildly NSFW (nothing above PG-13), worrying about being outted, family pressure and obligations, verbal abuse from parents

Dialogue: The thing that stood out to me the most was the fluid and natural dialogue. The pacing in general was great!

Film club: The plot circles around the film club and it’s an important part of the story. I liked that it wasn’t a side thing and that it helped keep the plot moving forward

Sunbae/hoobae: Korean equivalent to senpai/kouhai. Seowoo sunbae was my favorite! Sometimes she’d be illustrated with a tiny tooth and it was v cute

More lesbians: There were a surprising amount of queer ladies? There are def men in the story and ofc not every single woman was gay, but there were a lot more than I expected. Nice that it wasn’t just the main couple!

Rating: 9 out of 10 War Kong Wai films

It Would be Great if You Didn’t Exist AKA Wish You Were Gone // 네가 없었으면 좋겠어 by Carbonara

Content warnings: mildly NSFW (nothing past PG-13), people stalk the main couple, child abuse (flashbacks), violence (there’s an incident), worrying about being outted

Angsty?: The beginning is the best part. I wouldn’t say it goes downhill after that but..... it just get kinda angsty? I was surprised how much of their past traumas became a big part of the story. There were still a lot of cute moments sprinkled in until the end tho!

Art: The art is super cute! And I loved that one of the main’s bffs was shown to be GNC since childhood

Rating: 8 out of 10 fat cats named pumpkin

Everyday Lily // 백합은 일상 by Gom Mali

Content warnings: Jua has a history of being a predatory lesbian

4-koma: Some serious things happen in the second half of the story, but for the most part, things are really light and silly

Older lesbians: Jua is still in college, but she does have older lesbian friends, which was nice to see! The oldest one was maybe 30?

Rating: 7 out of 10 kisses in front of the Eiffel Tower

Her Tale of Shim Chong // 그녀의 심청 by Biwan, Seri

Content warnings: gender violence, sexual harassment, threats of sexual assault, wife battery, stabbing, illness & death, extreme poverty

Plot: Girl can’t catch a break!!! I was exhausted from all the bad things that happened. It felt like a constant barrage of misfortune. I stopped reading bc I just had a pit in my stomach the whole time I read

Potential reasons to read: Even tho I wasn’t a huge fan of the story, I still give it a higher rating bc the art is SO beautiful. I also really liked the unnie/fortune teller, as a friend to Shim Chong and as an individual character

Ratings: 7 out of 10 cursed foxes

HONORABLE MENTION: Fluttering Feelings // 설레는 기분 by ssamba

Content warnings: domestic violence near the beginning

STORY DISCONTINUED: After battling cancer for years, the author passed away in Feb 2018. There are no official plans for the story’s continuation

Personally significant: I still get choked up whenever I think about FF and the author. This story was so important to me in undergrad! I haven’t re-read it since the author’s death, so I’m sorry if I forgot any major content warnings :(

Slow burn: Two friends slowly realizing their feelings for each other. Very tender and realistic

Rating: 10 out of 10 soft touches and longing looks

OTHER POPULAR TITLES:

Miss Devil and Miss Angel // 천사씨와 악마님 by Maeu Malgeum

Partition // 파티션 by Team Tea Cozy

Dallae // 달래야 by Choonae

#manhwa recs #webtoons #moonlight garden #blooming sequence #it would be great if you didn't exist #fluttering feelings #hearticho posts

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forasecondtherewedwon · 5 years ago

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Def 34

Thanks for the prompt, Anons! (And special thanks, Anon #2. I appreciate that so, so much.)

LateralPairing: Peter Parker x Michelle Jones (Spideychelle)Rating: TWord count: 1105

34. “You might not like me, but you definitely want me.”

Peter made the football team. Of course he did. The onlything Michelle figured the coach hadn’tbeen sure about was which position Peter should be given. Where do you put thekid who can run suicide drills indefinitely, throw a ball with a perfect spiralthe full length of the field, take a hit from a guy twice his size withoutmoving an inch, and weave with more agility than any player the team has everhad? Michelle assumed the coach had worked that question out sometime betweenhis days of drooling over the new recruit’s hustle and his nights ofchampionship dreams, visions of shiny gold trophies dancing in his head. Thewhole nine.

After years of honing her observation skills, Michelle wasfrustrated to find Peter Parker so unpredictable. When people quit marching band,usually it was to devote more time to the robotics lab or the chess club, notso they could shrug off the nerd mantle and become the overnight star of thefootball team. It was unprecedented.

She saw him a lot, almost as much as ever. Not on purpose;Michelle had always taken a certain quiet delight in perching on the bleachersand sketching the team’s top-shelf assholes, so she was often around duringpractices. There was a niche, she felt, in pencil drawings of smack-talkingbigots in homoerotic tussles.

Luckily―not that she had any kind of emotional investment inhis moral status―Peter had never adopted his new bros’ prejudices. But thatdidn’t mean he hadn’t changed. He took up more space. It wasn’t a physicaldifference (he was too smart to go down the junk-shrivelling steroids route ofsome of the seniors, twitchy fingers crossed for a benevolent scout and acollege scholarship), it was his ego. In that he’d apparently decided he hadone. Quiet Peter Parker, marching band Peter Parker, Penis Parker, was newly known (by Michelle, who observed) toaccomplish such spectacular feats as using his prodigy brain forguffaw-provoking comebacks in the cafeteria and―gasp―talking to girls.

Michelle couldn’t confirm the plural, but she felt safeassuming it. For some reason, she wasn’t very keen to catch him flirting orstaring at a classmate’s ass. The only girl she’d witnessed Peter communicatingwith was her. And she didn’t say anything back.

When he approached her, she ignored him. Aggressively. Hisfootball cleats would come clicking up the bleachers during a water break and, becauseof her self-determined imperative to block him out, she’d look nowhere but atthe sketchpad in her lap. Sometimes, it took ages before Peter would stoptormenting her with attempted small talk; her reference material (the playerson the field) grew less fresh in her mind. In those moments, feeling his softbrown eyes on her and unable to meet them, Michelle found that she couldn’teven fill her pages with flowers―a subject she’d always felt confident drawingfrom memory. Her pen or pencil would only trace meandering curlicues. Eventually,he’d go back to practice.

This new Peter didn’t make sense to her, nor did the way herheart surged when he was close by. Until she got a feel for him from adistance, Michelle wasn’t going to be any more inviting. It wasn’t like they’dbeen friends before anyway.

As football season went on, with her wearing a raincoat topractices just in case the sky opened and she needed to shove her sketchpadinside, things became better between them. But that was Michelle’s headtalking. To a more sensitive part of herself, things were much worse.

He put himself in her way―maybe holding a door for her,maybe next in line at the water bottle refilling station when she turnedaround―but he wouldn’t speak to her and she wouldn’t look at him any higherthan his chest. Michelle had a feeling Peter was doing it on purpose. Being sosolidly present that she couldn’t pretend not to see him, and then waiting forher to initiate a conversation. By the end of October, she almost did, but hewalked away as her lips parted.

Michelle was tense. She couldn’t sleep, although her bed wasextra cozy now that she’d yanked her winter comforter out of the closet.

She didn’t realize it was affecting Peter too, their…whatever it was, until she was back on the bleachers, sketching and freezingher ass off thanks to New York’s first cold snap, and heard the coach yell hisname. “Damn good catch, Parker,” “That’s it, that’s it, Peter”―those were shouts Michelle had heard oftenenough, but this one wasn’t praise. Her head snapped up. Peter was slouching tothe sidelines, fingers hooked through the faceguard of his helmet as he let itslap against his thigh. He saw her looking down at him and she knew there was amoment coming that she couldn’t escape.

Peter climbed the steps, eyes lowered, and Michelle made aquick sketch in her mind, noting the sweaty curls of his hair, the tension inhis hands. It was a very windy day―the pages of her book rippling―and she couldhardly breathe.

He reached her, putting on a confident stance.

“You might not like me,” Peter announced, “but youdefinitely want me.”

Her insides compressed in a sensation that felt like fury,but then Michelle considered what he’d said. Peter thought she didn’t like him.Well, duh, of course she didn’t. Except… She met his gaze and let it catch thistime, let it hold. As wide as his eyes were, he hadn’t given any of that spaceto arrogance; staring into them was a completely separate experience fromhearing his voice. There was vulnerability in his face and nothing else.

Peter wasn’t teasing her, though he’d nailed that brand ofjock-type phrase. He desperately, Michelle saw, wanted her to want him. Want him, not the role he’d been learningsince making the football team. She’d been uncharacteristically stupid,observing his failure to fit in with this group in a thousand details and notcomprehending his loneliness.

Squinting one eye shut as the ubiquitous cloud cover slid momentarilyclear of the sun, Michelle cut their locked gaze in half.

“I like you fine, Peter,” she told him, open eye watering.

The next day, she was early to Biology and glanced up to seePeter stalled at the classroom’s threshold, one of the football guys loudly butjokingly hassling him about quitting the team. Their eyes met as Peter turnedaway from his former teammate and headed to his seat. He smiled at her.

For the rest of the period, graphite lilies bloomed in Michelle’sfootnotes.

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morinokunikara · 5 years ago

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👀☁️💕👑🌗📚💎🔪🏡🏞️🥀🌼💐🦋🍂☕🍼🕊️❤️🔥❄️🌙☀️🌟 (for Kokoro

swputting this one under a readmore

🌟 When your OC loses all hope, who do they turn to first? What helps make them feel better? What calms them down and reassures them? Why?

yuuki. she trusts him more than anyone else. usually doing exercise will help her mood, she just loves the feeling of a good workout so much and it provides a good distraction. also sometimes just seeing yuuki smile. she loves him and she knows hes been through so much and honestly his happiness means more to her than her own.

☀️ What makes your OC genuinely happy? A person, an item, their hobby? Where is the place they’re happiest, or most at home? What is the happiest they’ve ever been?

yuuki makes her more happy than anything else, although her clubs and friends in them do as well. winning games or a really good performance in a play will always bring a big huge smile to her face. she feels more at home in her clubs than at home, because most the time she cant get in a word with yuuki bc her parents are hogging her.

happiest she ever was was when her family went to destinyland and they let her and yuuki walk alone together. they got some real bonding time, riding rides and getting dinner together, and then watching one of the fireworks shows. its the most time she ever got to spend with him without their parents getting in the way and she treasures it forever.

🌙 If your OC could have one wish come true what would it be and why? Would there be consequences to this wish or would they regret it once they get what they want? What would they give in return for this wish to come true?

for her parents to pay attention to yuuki more, or just really. him being more loved in general. theres pretty much nothing that would make her regret it, and nothing she wouldn’t pay. she cares about him so so much and would give everything if it meant he was happy

❄️ What makes your OC sad, so sad that they can’t help but cry all day? How do they cheer themself up? Does their sadness upset any of their loved ones too?

any kind of failure, feeling like shes hated, hell sometimes just her parents praising her too much because she just gets so overwhelmed, and it makes her think too much about how ignored her brother is all the time. she usually goes out and practices her soccer or whatever show shes doing for theatre. she hides her sadness pretty well, but any of her family would be upset by knowing she’s sad (hence why she hides it)

🔥 If your OC known for having temper tantrums? If not, what gets them really angry? What makes their blood BOIL? Is there anyway to calm them down or are they unstoppable? What are they like when they’re angry? Do they take it out on their loved ones?

not at all. shes very patient and can put up with a LOT, but she will snap if someone is too mean to yuuki. i feel like she would eventually snap at her parents but she really tries as hard as she can not to bc she worries itll make things worse. bc shes so patient, when shes angry she gets so angry it can take awhile to calm her down

❤️ What would your OC’s ideal lover be like? Appearnce, personality, voice? Would their family approve or would it be civil war?

her one requirement is “respect me and my family.” shes not picky, but she does like athletic/buff types a bit more.

🕊️ Would your OC ever get married or are they already wed? If they’re married, describe what their wedding was like! If not, describe their ideal wedding (or do this if you feel like it anyway!)

she has this big fancy idea of a dream wedding at destinyland, with a theme centered around classic romantic plays.

🍼 Does your OC have any children or want children? What names would they pick? Are they good with kids or a complete disaster?

she does want kids, and she plans to name them all after extended family. with her strong value towards family and disappointment in her own parents, one of her biggest dreams is to raise a family with someone

☕ Give us one (or more if you feel like it) of your OCs deep dark secrets! Why do they keep it hidden? Spill the tea!

shes actually kind of miserable emotionally. she it all up until she’s on her own, and then she just completely breaks down in her room. she’s had to lock herself in the restroom in public a few times bc one small thing will happen and it’ll just be the straw the breaks the camel’s back

🍂 What are their opinions on the different seasons? Which one do they hate and which one do they love and why?

she HATES summer but loves spring. its too hot in the summer to work out as much as she’d like. she doesn’t like winter much for the opposite reason of it being too cold, and is kind of neutral on fall. she thinks spring is prettier.

🦋 If your OC could change everything (or just something) about their life would they? What would they change? What do they think would happen if they did? What would their loved ones think?

oh yeah she’d def change a lot. give herself better parents that pay attention to their children equally, make herself less talented, anything that’ll get her less attention and yuuki more attention

💐 Does your OC like flowers? What are their favourites? Do they keep a garden of some sort? What flowers would they use in a flower crown? (and if you like, research the meanings behind those flowers!)

she loves flowers!!! her and yuuki have a garden together in their backyard... her crown would be azaleas (patience), hydrangeas (pride), and spider lilies (sweet)

🌼 Write a short drabble from your OCs POV meeting their LI (or if they don’t have a love interest, their best friend. If you don’t want to do a drabble, describe their first meeting instead!)

(dont have the brain power for a drabble rn but) im 90% sure itd start with her accidentally kicking a soccer ball in someone’s face and then being like “oh fuck theyre cute”

🥀 Has your OC ever been hurt by someone they love? Ever been betrayed? Abused? Attacked? Give me the angst! (if you’d like, write a short drabble about it!)

not physically, but she got really hurt by yuuki once because of a misunderstanding. she talked about wanting to play volleyball at shujin and yuuki panicked because oh god know i cant let him get to her i have to protect her and she took him objecting to it as him being jealous and they got in a huge argument over it. she was so upset that, in her mind, yuuki was so bitter and jealous he wouldnt let her follow her dreams

🏞️ If your OC could travel to anywhere in their world where would they go? Why? If they could live there would they?

brazil!!! she’s heard a lot about amazing brazilian soccer players and wants to see it for herself. she would never want to live there though, or really anywhere outside of tokyo

🏡 Describe your OCs ideal house! Give us a tour around! What’s their garden like? Their bedroom? Kitchen? Where is it and how many people live there?

a moderately-sized house for a small family of four, like the one she lives in. it’s decorated with the achievements of her family (trophies, art, etc). a kitchen big enough for the family to cook together, and a fancy dining room. lots of family photos on the walls and any available surface, and a family garden in the backyard.

🔪 Has your OC ever killed someone? Ever had to defend themselves against violence? How did this make them feel? Or, alternatively, has your OC ever attacked someone? Seen someone die?

shes never been through any of that fortunately

💎 Does your OC collect anything? Is there a reason? When did they start and is it beginning to turn into a little bit of a hoarding issue? What do they do with their collection?

she collects playbills and a few different sports trading cards!! the playbills started when she saw her first play at 5, and the trading cards at 8. she has several large folders for her cards and a big huge box for her playbills

📚 If your OC was given some kind of forbiddon knowledge, what would they do with it? Would they tell anyone? Use it for evil or good? How would it change their outlook on life, if at all?

shed keep it super super super secret... would do everything in her power not to use it at all, but if she did she’d use it for good.

🌗 Early mornings or late nights? What do they spend their time doing during these hours?

early mornings!!! she goes for a short jog every morning before school, and then helps her dad with breakfast and sometimes drags yuuki out of bed if he oversleeps

👑 If your OC was made royal (or is royal) how would they use their power? Are they a good leader or bad? Do their subjects like them or is it ‘off with their head’? Do they enjoy being royal?

shed be a very kind ruler, and try to listen to and solve all the problems she possibly could. so ofc shes very very loved. she doesnt like it though. she doesnt like having that much power, she feels its unfair.

💕 How is your OC like with physical affection? What are their boundries? Do they enjoy being touched or is that a no-go? Is there any reason behind this?

she loves to cuddle with people, physical affection is one of her main love languages. she hugs yuuki every time he walks through the door. she doesnt want much beyond that though, at least at her age

☁️ What’s something your OC wishes they could forget? Why is this? Or, what is something that your OC has forgotten? (or do both!)

she wants to forget her biggest screw up in her mind- when she was so nervous for a play (her biggest role at that point), when she got onstage she panicked and totally forgot her lines and just. completely froze.

👀 Describe your OC through the eyes of another person! (bonus + specify who)

ofc i gotta do yuuki

she’s an adorable and caring little sister he loves so much. he’s a bit jealous of her, but he doesnt blame her for anything. he just wishes he could be as good and loved as she is.

#god i lost focus like 4 times doing this #sorry if the answers arent particularly amazing i started feeling rlly yucky midway through #but wanted to finish #Anonymous #mailbox #oc tag: kokoro

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nocvil · 6 years ago

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* ‐ ․ ↺ 𝙄𝙉𝙏𝙍𝙊𝘿𝙐𝘾𝙄𝙉𝙂 . . . ｓｏｏｂｏｇｕｍ . hitman . caretaker . the heel . a masked hell .

❝ my love , my love , my love , won't you stay a while ? ❞

possible tw’s below: parental death mention, illness mentions, murder for hire mentions, and uh m,,, i think that’s it rlly. just warning ok.

GENERAL INFO

full name: soo bogum ( 수 보검 ). nickname(s): bo, sweetie pie to his mother (: gender & pronouns: cismale, he/him. sexual & romantic orientation: aromantic, demisexual. age & dob: twenty-five, november 8th, 19-- birthplace/hometown: seoul, sk. parents/siblings: only child, deceased father, living mother. pet(s): absolutely not LOL. astrological sign: scorpio. >:-) dominant hand: both! handwriting style: mostly writes in very slanted cursive. i feel like when you see things like royal documents signed or very important letters written back in the day with that vintage cursive ... that would be bogum. language(s) known/spoken: spanish, english, korean. religion: LOL. ok. current living arrangements: a two-bedroom, two bath apartment complex with his older, npc mother. it is pretty spacious given they both have their own room, a kitchen, dining space, their own bathrooms, and a patio. bo has the money if you kno what i mean ... (: occupation/major: hitman.

PHYSICAL

picture reference: uhh... this? this look rlly gives off bogum vibes so (: blood type: type O. nationality: korean. skin tone/color: lighter tanned. birthmarks & scars: heheh wouldn’t u like to kno ??? height: five-foot ten inches. 5′10″. build: pretty average, more on the lean/athletic side though. hair color: red. hair length: uhm ,, look at reference photo? eye color: brown. diet: uhm ... bo has a pretty average diet probably. he would eat just about anything, not very picky. i think he probably has his favorites when it comes to chips and candy but he doesn’t have a special diet. exercise & level of fitness: LOOOL. let me not make a bad joke here ): how’s their posture ( or lack thereof )?: bogum probably has really good posture! i think standing tall with a straight back probably adds to his uh... authoritative look? typical style of dress: ( from his stats page ) dresses a bit old school, vintage?, almost plain. likes wearing tucked in and cuffed shirts, rolled up pants, boots, baseball caps, at least three rings on one hand, gold bracelets. the following outfits aren’t specific to him but they are probably kinda similar. it’s hard to rlly find exact examples ): ( 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 ) body modifications: none, surprisingly. probably pierced ears that he never puts earrings in. that’s really it though. he would prob like a tattoos but wouldn’t do it for the sake of his career ( because tattoos are distinguishing features ).

MANNERISMS

how does your muse walk?: def with a bit of power in his step. very protective when he is with his mother. mostly, he would walk like he calculates every single step he takes. how does your muse talk?: HAHA i just talked about this with myungok’s mun ,, he would talk very plain and probably without a lot of emotion. this would make things that are usually out of pocket probably sound kinda weird. what accent/dialect does your muse talk with?: he is from seoul and according to google, they speak with a gyeonggi dialect there (: how would you describe the tone of their voice? are they loud or quiet?: QUIET... shh... if you speak too loud you won’t hear bogum speaking with such monotoned you could probably fall asleep. bogum asmr when? what does their laugh sound like?: bogum? LAUGHING? i feel like bogum chuckles. so he would have like a short, quiet laugh. how does your muse typically smell?: either like smoke from a cigarette or like his mom’s perfume. what kind of air do they carry?: well jinae’s mun said he would have a dark and heavy presence and honestly that rlly fits the bill. do they have a(ny) catchphrase(s)?: time to die. what are their nervous ticks?: um.. not sure. probably knuckle cracking and finger tapping.

PSYCHOLOGY

what makes your muse happiest?: his mommy! seeing his mom thrive and gain her confidence back, even momentarily, makes him so happy. what upsets them the most?: ugh. listen. i talked abt this with some of y’all but the thought that if he ever got exposed or arrested ... how everyone in his life, including his mother, would just abandon him ... CRIES. was this supposed to be a general question? does your muse have any quirks?: i think his tendency to just be way too lax in certain situations would be his infamous quirk. what are their hobbies? how frequent do/can they do them?: bogum is definitely a simple man. he would totally like puzzles, word searches, watching the news, scrapbooking ( YES, SCRAPBOOKING ), taking walks, shopping with his mom, writing, idk, he doesn’t do anything OD or over the top. shrug. do they have any guilty pleasures?: is your muse an extrovert or an introvert? neither?: 10000% introverted otl. do they have high or low self-esteem? what about confidence?: uhm... bogum probably has an average amount of confidence/self-esteem. he’s a realist, definitely. if he look ugly he look ugly. if he look good he look good. ‘nuff said. are they easily stressed and how do they normally respond to it?: stressed? bogum could be in the midst of a bank robbery and be sitting there like ok, y’all done yet? what is your muses worst fear?: his mother finding out about his job. what is your muses biggest dream?: to either escape his job for good or to be able to heal his mother of all her injuries and illnesses. but of course, neither of those will ever happen! is your muse a morning person or a night dragon?: a night dragon? ok. anyway he is probably both. i can see bogum getting like four hours of sleep and waking up like (: let’s fuckin go! how intelligent is your muse? do they acknowledge it?: OH BOGUM has street smarts but definitely probably not book smarts. at least, not a great amount of book smarts. how can he be a hitman if he’s DUMM?! describe their sense of humor: LMAO. the real question is how can someone as funny as ME play someone as BORING as bogum?

RELATIONSHIP TENDENCIES

are they currently in any sexual or romantic relationships?: HELL NO. luuuul. what is their experience with relationships?: to really think about it, bo probably had feelings for people here and there and most likely dated short term in high school but after he moved and began doing that he kind of lost all his effort to pursue romance. how does your muse view the idea of friends with benefits? have they ever had one? would they ever?: another hell naw to that sis. how important is sex to your muse?: not important at all. bogum could care less. what are their biggest turn on and turn offs?: see above pls. does your muse find it easy to make friends?: i say yes, only because most of his friends are through his mother. how important is friendship to them?: veRY IMPORTANT if bogum didn’t have the friends he has today, he probably would be a lot more sad and maybe more than just a hitman ): quantity or quality of friends?: quality! how important is family?: VERY IMPORTANT AGAIN bogum would give his life for his mother and to have his father back. are they close to their family? why or why not ?: YES. obviously asdfasdf everyone probably knows why. although bogum is now the one who runs the house, he still really values his mother because she ultimately has nobody but him in the end if she gets worse. his parents were always really good to him and when his father died, he knew that he and his mother had to stick together through it. he also knew that that he had to step up to provide for his mother because of her injuries and dementia. she is his life, really.

FAVORITES

activity: haha. you really wanna kno?... he likes word searches a lot. animal: idk. probably like. idk. beverage: mmmm some piping hot tea. book: - color: is red cliche to say? designer: - food: flower: water lilies, pansies, lilies, peonies, idk, he would love all kinds of flowers. gem: i googled these. if he had a favorite it would be garnet, smoked topaz, and morion. holiday: christmas! his mother’s favorite too, probably. mode of transportation: walking, usually. movie: - musical artist: oh boy, uhm,, i bet bogum likes indie kpop. like dean, suran, hyukoh, but i dont rlly know a lot to give you more details. quote / saying: - scenery: hm. probably night time in the living room, mom is put to bed already, he’s watching a rerun episode of a crime drama on television and thinking about how it’s so unrealistic. he’s got a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other though he puts it out halfway through because he loses interest. (: scent: i think he’d like the smell of cleaning products, flower scents ( bc it would remind him of his mom ), and metal (: obviously. weather: cloudy or rainy weather. anything that let’s him stay inside for the day. vacation destination: UM. i bet bogum would like to travel out of country to places like europe.

ATTITUDES

greatest dream: to finally have a peaceful life with his mother by his side, healthy or not. he wants to stop being a hitman, really, but it’s kind of like an addiction, plus he’s good at it, and it brings in the bacon. greatest fear: being caught and leaving his mother by herself -- it would be like the ultimate let down since he doesn’t trust anyone with her. most at east when: pls see scenery in section above. least as ease when: out in public by himself. he doesn’t have his mom as his cover. worst possible thing that could happen: PLS SEE GREATEST FEAR. ajdfkjasdfskf biggest achievement: moving to seoul safely with his mom! biggest regret: falling back into the crime life. most embarrassing moment: idk i feel like bogum isn’t embarrassing. he’s too ,, plain. biggest secret: LMAO well ... i think we all know. top priorities: keeping his mom safe, alive, healthy, and her bills paid for. also keeping himself undercover for the most part and making sure neither him or his mother are overwhelmed.

EXTRA TIDBITS

001. bogum is an unhealthy smoker but a social drinker. he never smokes around his mother though.

002. whenever bogum’s mother is around, he is on his own best behavior. he always does his best to be nice and keep up an image of her sweet son although by himself he can be different.

003. so far the only person who knows about his job is sangwoo because he sort of saw him in the act during his first hit. the two joke about it but bogum would take him out in a heartbeat if he spills.

004. i think it’s funny because i always pictured bogum as that person would give the shirt off of his back for you if you were in trouble. but he also wouldn’t hesitate to threaten to make you disappear.

005. his mom doesn’t know how he gets the money to pay for everything but bogum has her believing he “has his ways” and to “just trust him” although she asks about it every now and then.

006. though he stays inside a lot, some of the places you might see bogum outside of his apartment, are grocery stores close to his place, bars around town, museums, little cafes picking up things for his mother, dawon’s flower shop, and very occasionally places where there are a lot of drug activity.

007. here is smth: bogum is a hitman because his father was killed in a hit!

008. despite his mom questioning where he earns his money, his family has always been pretty well off but that was because of his father. so now that his father isn’t alive, it’s kind of ... fishy.

009. lmao probably your very typical scorpio minus the s*xual stuff.

010. my brain stopped working.

AESTHETICS

a card hand full of royals. empty, dark hospital hallways. dirty hands under black leather gloves. an empty, lonely wheelchair. old black and white photographs. an ashtray full of half smoked cigarettes. ripped up diary pages. rolled up fifty dollar bills. two expensive rings on each finger. responding “k” to a paragraph long text message. tri-folded letters written in the upmost calligraphy. roman numeral clocks.

#daegu:task #⸢ 。‧ * ‧﹒、i think it’s time to pack it in . 𝒹𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓁𝑜𝓅𝓂𝑒𝓃𝓉 . ⸥#I ADDED my own section at the bottom bc why not (:#ok i see u all later

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theitalianscribe · 6 years ago

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The First Practice

Part 1 | Part 2 (Coming Soon) | Part 3 (You are here)

Summary: A lot of first meetings. Local anxious gay finds some athletic gays(tm)

The first meeting that Virgil attended of the Cerebrum High School Owls cheer squad had not been what he was expecting. Honestly, he wasn't sure what he was expecting; his knowledge of cheer squads came from the Bring it On movies, musical, and non-bring it on use of mean girls on cheer squads in shows like Buffy the Vampire Slayer. That is, he probably expecting a group of impossibly fake white girls subtly talking each other down or a group of athletes obsessed with the sport. Then he bumped into a very short girl with glasses, darkish-blonde hair, and who frantically waved her hands over her heart.

"Err...I am the one who is sorry?" Virgil answered, though it came out in a question. Then he quickly shook his head, pointed to himself, and repeated the motion. She blinked, smiled a little, then ran off. Moments later, she returned with Patton. The girl had a hint of a smile while the older cheer member was grinning. Virgil blinked for a moment. They had different hair color, but something about their faces and freckles seemed close.

She whispered something to Patton's ear and began to bounce on the balls of her feet. That was when he noticed that rather than wearing the typical gym uniform that some of the other students had dawned, her clothes seemed looser and more breathable. She also was wearing a vest and was playing with the strings.

"I see you have met Robin. She is one of the few people that actually asks and is capable of wearing the mascot suit." Roman's voice was both booming and gentle. Robin made several gestures that equated to some form of "okay," and he rose his volume to its typical gusto. "Let's get you introduced to the others. Roll Call!!"

Within seconds, the scattered teens were in a row and standing at attention.

"They call me Patton. I'm small and strong and will hug you to life!" Patton started

"My name is Jeannine, I like space and sports and cats."

"Harper. They/them please. I like spiders and caterpillars and crafting!"

"The name is Lili, not like the flower, please. If you hurt my best friend, I'll kick you in the knees!"

"Lili!!! That is not the introduction we can go with! We'd get disqualified at nationals."

"Also violence is wrong, though I appreciate how much you want to protect my sister."

"Nobody hurts Robin!" The blue-eyed girl protested. She really didn't look like what Virgil would have expected of a cheerleader. Sure, she had the build of an athlete, but the various basketballs and baseball patches sewn to her jacket, on top of the baseball cap, seemed to suggest that she would be more interested in one of the competitive sports.

"Newbies," Jeannine scoffed.

"That was you a year ago," a teen yet to be introduced giggled. This person seemed to be made of cheer, from her sunny smile to the colorful socks and shoes, to the long-outdated sillybands still around her wrists, to the sweater she was wearing in spite of the ensuing workout.

"Name's Mabel, by the way! I'm a Junior. My bro is in the nerd squad.

"Virgil," he returned the hearty shake.

"Ooh! You're cute! Want me to take your measurements?" She asked in what might be interpreted as a sultry voice if the listener or speaker had never heard a sultry voice.

"I...I'm gay," Virgil squeaked.

Understanding spread over Mabel's face. "Ohh! Most of us are," She giggled, "You'll fit right in. I still want to knit you something. I do it for all our new recruits!"

"You don't have to."

"Consider it payment in advance for dealing with her antics," Lili called.

"Did I just come out to all of the Owls?" Virgil asked in a panic.

"No," Lili whispered, "And if you want it to be a secret, we will keep it safe." Both girls made the motion of locking their lips and disposing of the key. "I just got Mabel being extra sense. Trust me, it is better to just accept the gifts. She can be a lot, but she can't help it, so she makes up for it with gifts and nice gestures. Though the shipping is less of a gesture,"

Mabel chuckled nervously. "Let's get to practicing. Romeo! Where are we starting."

"Warm ups!"

After an hour and a half of exercise, introductions, and demonstrations of maneuvers, Virgil found himself collapsing in the grass. Three-fourths of the way through the practice, Robin had reluctantly retired to the bleachers. Lili would hop out of the practice circle to push the water cooler closer to her, attempt breathing exercises, and chatting.

There was a tap at Virgil's shoulder. He turned and was handed his bag. Virgil searched his memory for the sign for, "Thank you." She nodded and Virgil made a mental note to get Logan to tutor him in ASL.

“Sorry, my ASL is r-u-s-t-y,” he signed, sometimes resorting to spelling out the words.

“You don’t need to sign. I can hear. I appreciate it, though.”

“Oh. Does it bother you to hear voices…er that wasn’t meant to be rude…er.”

She smiled and laughed. He could start to see the resemblance. After a moment, she pulled out a phone and started typing.

“Sometimes senses get too high-def,” he read off the screen. “My voice is too loud for me sometimes. It feels easier to sign sometimes. I know it’s dumb and an over complicated solution but.”

“It doesn’t sound stupid. Brains are weird. You found a loophole to yours. Whatever works works.”

She giggled and typed some more, “Romey and Patty say the same thing. Lili doesn’t comment on it, but I think she thinks it’s silly and hates herself for thinking so.”

“You and Lili seem close.”

Robin smiled and whispered, “Yeah. I really like her…Even if she isn’t a cat person.”

It felt like an inside joke, but Virgil found her laughter contagious.

“Hey,” Lili called from where she, Mabel, and Harper were practicing pyramids. “You better not be stealing my best friend.”

Robin signed something that Virgil couldn’t catch. (it was “Nobody could replace you,”)

“Darn right!”

“Language, Lili,” Patton called out.

When the others went back to practicing, Virgil turned back to Robin. “So, owl suit.”

“I like birds and it feels kind of safe in there,” she typed out

“Doesn’t the smell get bad? It must get sweaty in there.”

“Not really,” Robin typed out before grinning. “I use a plug-in.” She whispered

“Wait, like those wall diffuses?”

Robin signed, “Yes.”

“Isn’t that dangerous?”

Her face melted into horror. “Don’t tell Patton, please!” She typed out.

“I won’t,” he quickly reassured her. Still, those things had glass and chemicals that could irritate the skin. “Why not use air fresheners…oh, too strong. Oh! Tea bags! Those are way softer. Remy puts those in his car so he doesn’t have to buy anything. I think leaves or cinnamon could work too.”

Robin hugged him. “You’re a genius!” She said in the loudest hushed voice. He jumped a little at the sudden contact. She pulled away and looked him in the eyes, “Whoever you like, I will do whatever I can to get you two together…or at least a first date.”

He blinked at that, but she didn’t seem to have more to say on the matter. After an awkward 5 minutes of Virgil watching Roman direct the squad, a phone was maneuvered in front of his face.

“Want to see my pet rats and frog?” it read.

“Sure,” was his immediate and puzzled response.

By the time everyone returned to the bleachers and Patton gratefully accepted the water bottle his sister offered, Virgil had decided that Montgomery and Gregor were angels and that the squad itself wasn’t too bad. He wouldn’t mind attending the next meeting.

#SS Cheer AU #Icy scribes #Virgil Sanders #Patton Sanders #Remy Sanders #Roman Sanders #Lilianne Graham (OC)#Mabel Pines #Robin (oc)#Janeane (OC)#Harper (OC)#Some things will likely change #but it should be noted that Robin is Patton's little sister in this au #Lili Robin and Janeane are OC's from something that doesn't exactly exist yet #and I made up Harper on the spot but I love them #Lili is short for Lilianne

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diveronarpg · 6 years ago

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Congratulations, ASH! You’ve been accepted for the role of CLEOPATRA. Admin Jen: I am someone who is completely enthralled by Cleopatra, both as a historical figure and a Shakespeare character. So I have to admit, I had big expectations but, Ash, you completely surpassed them! God, I can’t even express how over the moon I am about this application. Your take on Calina was thrilling to read and pick apart; from the intriguing comparisons you drew between her and her iconic historical counterpart, to the beautiful references to Cleopatra’s history and the poetic tragedy of her story, to the amazing character analysis you explored in the Extras section. These intricacies complimented your deep understanding of Calina, bringing your portrayal to life and making it wholly yours. Your passion for her really shines through and it was a beautiful sight to behold! We can’t wait to see the Queen on the dash! Please read over the checklist and send in your blog within 24 hours.

WELCOME TO THE MOB.

Out of Character

Alias | Ash

Age | 24

Preferred Pronouns | She/Her

Activity Level | Still a working gal, so I’m def still limited to nights and weekends. But y’all know I hardly leave Discord so I’m always about to plot.

Timezone | EST

Current/Past RP Accounts | Can I just… *slides tib’s account over* http://oftybalts.tumblr.com/

In Character

Character | Calina “CLEOPATRA” Sokolova.

What drew you to this character? | Cleopatra. What a woman. In both Shakespeare and in history – and while his name comes first in the play’s title, it is not Antony that gets remembered, is forever emblazoned in history, depicted in art, fashioned in costumes on halloween, celebrated as royalty, nor does he become the sole female symbol to a nation. It is her. The harlot. The seductress. The woman, who many thought did not deserve the crown to her own country.

But it is this kind of a woman that Calina is destined to become. Rising from the ashes of her past. Underestimated. Unbowed. And ultimately unbroken.

If so, the stars wouldn’t have written it that she be found in that alleyway by her adoptive mother. She wouldn’t have made it out of that brothel when she’d lost all else – her possessions, her pride, her hope. She wouldn’t have been found by Damiano and Faron and brought into the Montague fold. She was fated to be much more than a forgotten princess. She was fated to be the queen of an empire – and this is something she never allowed herself to forget again. It is this resilience that brings me to adore Calina so much. Where circumstance after circumstance forged against her was intended to make her wilt as well, she withstood. There’s a pain to that, a realness to that. These reasons make Calina not only a marvel, but an inspiration. As is her Shakespearean counterpart. When the Romans threatened to take the very empire that was her birthright, Cleopatra used the desire, she was so condemned for to create one of the most infamous political strongholds in history, to not only to save her crown but her country and her people as well. Has it not been said that the lily of the valley is the flower that blooms in spite of the darkness? There is no other soft-petaled thing that could depict Calina Sokolova more, though, it’s known she’d rather not be compared to such gentle ideals – she’s much more than that.

What also drew me to this character was the opportunity to find the balance between Cleopatra and Calina, identify the connections between their stories and personalities until they became one. What I love about Cleopatra as a person and a character manifested in Calina, is that she is the epitome of versatility. She is not so simple as to pigeonhole her into one category, one type of woman – as she is many – and she’d sooner sneer at anyone who thought her so one-dimensional. She is the prim scholar, the cultured savant, the coquettish minx, the charming socialite, the strategic tactician, the grateful soldier. There’s a quote I’ve come across and saved as inspiration – ““How many women are you,” he asked. “A legion,” I said” – and if I had to pick a sole defining string of words for my girl, it’d be this one. She’s willing to transform, adapt to whatever situation she might find herself in, an arsenal of personas at her disposal. It’s a skill that not many can master, but she does it with unfaltering grace and glamour as she’s traded her rags for foreign riches. She is every bit feline, perched high above the rest, tail swishing as she surveys and assesses before pouncing from her vantage point. A chessmaster, out-maneuvering and out-witting and out-strategizing the men in her midst, turning the tides into her favor. It is her femininity and willingness to utilize it that makes her underestimated, and perhaps that is her greatest weapon.

Lastly, what draws me to Calina is not only balancing her with Cleopatra, but sorting through the compiled contradictions that reside inside her head and heart. She knows what it is to love and be loved in return, but the beating bleeding thing in her chest is kept behind the gilded cage of her ribs now, as such loss and heartbreak cannot crack at her heart again, not when in the midst of war. Gentle things feel brittle against her skin, and yet brutality causes her to recoil in distaste. She despises those who lack loyalty, looks upon those of vicious tendency with suspicion, but cannot bring herself to be trustful of others as she wishes to observe such savagery and perhaps tailor a bit of it to suit her own purposes. She’s aligned herself with people who do despicable things all before breakfast, and yet she still has the energy to pettily turn up her nose at them all the same for it. She possesses an open mind, but tends to be unyielding and uncompromising when it comes to what she knows, casting her own judgements and aligning her logic only by her own side unless someone is in agreement with her. Hers is a superior intelligence, she knows, a quiet and sophisticated thing. She might be called shrewd or callous for the ruthless plans she might devise, the manipulations she’s deemed necessary, but it is important to note that Calina Sokolova is no more good than she is bad. Sure her origins are questionable, and her motives unknown by most, but she is not a villain – she is simply a woman trying to survive in the mess that men have so brutishly created and come out above it all. A woman trying to reclaim the second chance at life that she’d snatched from the Fates before they could sever it with cruel jagged scissors – because she deserved it. A woman trying to gain all the things she’d lost and then some. She hadn’t come to Verona seeking a throne or a crown, exactly, but if it fits…she’ll gladly rest it atop her head.

What is a future plot idea you have in mind for the character? | Where do you see this character developing, and what kind of actions would you have them take to get there? 3 future plot ideas would be preferable.

BUT SHE MAKES HUNGRY, WHERE SHE MOST SATISFIES | “A woman’s authority spelled a man’s deception.” It’s a quote I’ve crossed multiple times when doing research and looking for inspiration for Cleopatra. It alluded to the Roman narrative that had deemed her an enchantress, condemned by the men around her for her tempting ‘magic’ leading to the eventual demise of their greatest leaders. If only they knew that love was the reason, that their desire for her far outweighed reason, that being so foolish to let heart lead over head was their true downfall. But through the years, through her observation and careful practice, Calina has seen just how powerful of a sin lust can be – it’s not one of the seven deadliest for no reason. Guilty of strategizing her sexuality, she has used such wiles to obtain things that she had no money or status to simply ask for. When faced with her greatest obstacles, the hailed Queen of the Nile utilized her tactical mind as her greatest weapon too, and with forming such advantageous alliances was able to reap benefits she would never have been able to so much as grasp if so stubborn to work alone. She utilized love to shackle Rome’s greatest leader, affections to keep the independence of her country and hold an army between her fingertips. I would love nothing more than for Calina to utilize the strategy of her namesake, forge alliances of the unlikely kind, relationships of mutual benefit. Perhaps a faithless Capulet willing to build a bridge that might support her plans, her goals. Maybe even higher ranking Montagues who sat closer to the throne she so wants to sit prettily upon. ( Bonus points if such an alliance is romantic in nature. )

ETERNITY WAS IN OUR LIPS AND EYES | In history, it was a known fact that Cleopatra was led by her mind, while betraying her heart and sacrificing being with her beloved for the sake of the bigger picture. I strongly believe that Calina mirrors Cleopatra in that very aspect, her logical, analytical mind pushing her heart to the side more often than not. I hope to explore the matters of Calina’s head and heart, as they are both such fickle vitals within her. As a woman who is often led by one while prone to befalling the whispers of the other, there’s often a lot of inner turmoil inside of her. Far more used to being desired, she’s almost lost sight of what actual love should look like – though, she’d be a liar if she said it wasn’t the kind of passion and all-consuming intensity she craved deep down, the thing of fiction novels and foreign films. But she knows love has no place in war, knows she’d sooner die than find something so true, as it is often a tool forged to destroy pawns and capitalize on cruelly as leverage. Life has taught her that to love greatly means even greater loss, and she doesn’t know if she’s ready to lose again after just grabbing the reins back on her life. So she knows in her quest for power, that she must ignore the affectionate leanings she’s so inclined towards to fill such a gapingly empty hole inside of her. She is not void of fondness and she is not without her feelings (as much as she’d like to be), but it’ll come down to it when she has to ask herself which one does she want more, which one is more important: love and meaningful connection or power. A tender heart or a gilded crown? Or will clever Cleopatra find a way to have both?

THE THRONE OF OUR QUEEN IS EMPTY | Aligning herself with those that will protect her, benefit her most is Calina’s modus operandi. Distrustful of many aside from herself, Calina, ever the cynic, knows that you must be vigilant as snakes reside in the very grass she stands in. She still waits for the day that Faron might decide to collect his debt that he’d used to free her from the proverbial chains that kept her shackled to that brothel. Still waits for Damiano to name his price for extracting her to Verona. Never the type to bite the hand that feeds her, Calina is a willing and dutiful soldier, knowing that this is a prized opportunity, that not many are so fortunate to be plucked from the gutter and reincarnated as a new deity, given a new form, a new life. But she knows what desperation is like, and it tastes like bile at the back of her tongue, a lingering flavor that she wishes if only to rid herself of forever. She knows now what the elite tastes like, sweet and decadent like caramel, what it feels like, soft and rich like cashmere, and she’d be damned if she goes back to the streets of Russia she’d been made to merely exist in. Clinging to her new status is what she values most, and so she wants to rise in the ranks, secure her place in Damiano’s eyes. He has heard the stories, the words whispered about her unmatched mind, and she wishes to show him just what she can do for the Montagues. Her eyes are on an Emissary title (for now), not too keen, and far too ambitious to resort to taking orders as a mere soldier for long. But she knows her time will come – she’ll make sure of it. (And I want to see just how much she’s willing to do to achieve it.)

SHOULD YOU EVER COMPARE CAESAR WITH ANTONY | I believe I’m most excited to develop Calina’s connection with Alexander. It interests me because now that I’ve gotten acquainted with Alexander, he carries himself like the warrior Antony was, but his mind is what I know will intrigue Calina most, as she isn’t impressed with a show of muscle and brute strength (though it is entirely nice to view). He’s cunning and as sharp as the knife-carved curve of his grin, and it is this intelligence and drive that shows me shadows of Caesar in him. It is written that Caesar was truly a well-match for Cleopatra as they were intellectual equals, a power couple of sorts as they were ruled by their ambitious minds and worked through their mutually beneficial alliance together. So I’d love to see what kind of pair Calina and Alexander might make, where her intrigue of him will take her.

Are you comfortable with killing off your character? | It would crush me to kill my queen, but of course, if to propel the plot forward, I approve her demise, and it must be as grand and as poetic and as ironic of a death that Cleopatra deserves. If we got some snakes, that’d be greaaaat.

In Depth

In-Character Interview: The following questions must be answered in-character, and in para form (quotations, actions written out if applicable, etc). There is no minimum or maximum limit for your response - simply answer as you would if you were playing the character.

What is your favorite place in Verona?

She can answer the negative to this question rather than the positive. But such is customary of the cynic, is it not? She sees herself seated across from a Capulet counterpart, and only prays to the gods above that her discomfort does not shine through the darkness of her eyes. She sees the velveteen interior, she sees the girls scantily clad and palms itching, she sees Verona’s elite, their fingers offering silver and gold and the lights that have dimmed from the girls’ eyes suddenly returns if for a moment. She can’t see that last bit, but she knows because there was once a time when that had been her. She too had been the girl, glad to serve clients if only to receive payment enough to bring her closer to repayment of her debts. The Dark Lady only reminds her of a past she not only wishes to leave in the tattered pages of her history, but it’s one that needs to remain there, something of the past, a scar that had healed over finally.

“The Capital Library, of course.” Her gaze had been down, examining the pastel shade she’s chosen for her manicured hand, only for that that same hand to make a sweeping gesture, urging the journalist to cast their eyes upon even the furthest corners of her sitting room. Books, books and more books stacked neatly on shelves, perched precariously against the edges of tables, some lovingly dog-eared so she might not lose her page, others with delicate scribbles in the margins. Texts of new and old. Of the language Verona knows, and in tongues it does not. Her mind was a vast canvas, and reading is not only her solace, but the only way she might paint against it, knowledge of all kinds hanging themselves like masterpieces inside that pretty head of hers. So it’s only with a genuine spark in her tone that she continues, “There is hardly a scent I adore more than that of books.” A pause, a dainty tip of her head, the slightest tug to her lips, “Aside from medovik, of course…” She thinks then of Faron, who’d undoubtedly had a box with a slice of the delectable honey cake from their motherland left on her desk the other day. Once more, she can’t help as sentiment knocks at the door, awaiting answer, as he remembers details so minute, but she doesn’t let it in.

What does your typical day look like?

“Well–” Calina begins, eyes flitting up towards the ceiling in thought, one leg brought up to cross primly over the other, the gilded metallic G of her Gucci suede pumps catching in the afternoon light. “Waking up so horrendously early cannot seem to escape my routine.” She was forged into a creature of the night, nearly hissing as the sun’s rays would break through her curtains each morning. But she has since learned to become one with the day, after hating it for so long, detesting the sun for daring to rise when her world had descended into darkness. Nonetheless, she finds herself much preferring what happens before the sun goes down on this beautiful city. “But I do yoga, I have tea, I feed Si –” She begins her day with all things that relax her, as she knows it’ll only get more turbulent from there.

“I spend most of my day at the embassy more than I spend time here.” Cue the arrival of Osiris, her all black emperor of household, purring as he curls beneath her hand, starved from her affections as her day and night jobs keep her from their home far more than he appreciated. A jealous little thing, he was – not wanting to share his mum with anyone. “Much to this one’s displeasure,” she coos, picking up the cat, holding him tenderly to her chest. “Isn’t that right, darling?” A tinkling laugh slips past charming lips, mouth momentarily pressing to onyx fur to conceal the humor that curved her smile, “Though, I must say, my day only takes a turn for the boring from there. I meet with a few associates, and it’s instantly into interpreter mode.” She leans in then, as if sharing with them a hushed secret, “I’ll be lucky if I speak English for any amount of time.” A sigh of feigned disappointment escapes her, only for her to continue, “–and then…I suppose I come back here. Have a little dinner, a little wine. Only to rest and do it all over again the next morning.” It all sounds so trivial, and that is with good reason. There is no need for the darling journalist to be brought out of his ignorance of her true purpose here in fair Verona.

What has been your biggest mistake thus far?

A cant of her head, a knowing smile, “Do I look like a woman who makes mistakes?”

Miscalculations were a rarity with someone as careful, as cautious and as well-thought as Calina. But even she is prone to human error – not that the man who was seated across from her needed to know such a thing. Know that she was something mortal and not entirely godly. So, her lips purse as she waits, a finger idly brushing across her cupid’s bow – whether it’s deliberate, is not something you have to ask, as she intends to draw the eye there to the inviting part of her lips.

He pauses, chest rising with an inhale, the words seemingly teetering on the edge of his tongue unable to fall out, but he musters a shake of his head at her inquiry. He doesn’t think so. “Smart boy,” is her coy response, a flash of a wink in accompaniment, so quick if you blinked you’d probably miss it.

What has been the most difficult task asked of you? (tw: illusions of sexual assault)

It wasn’t asked. That was the problem.

To be asked would mean she was being gifted courtesy wrapped in a bow. To be asked would mean she’d be granted choice, the ability to accept or decline, to return or exchange with a receipt. But no – the most difficult task for Calina Solokova to face was demanded of her. (If she wanted to eat, if she wanted somewhere to sleep, if she wanted to live.)

It happened in the shadows where no one could see, perhaps it was best that way so the crystalline tears that treaded down her cheeks would never be seen by the light of day. It’s a memory pushed so far to the recess of her mind, she almost cannot recall all the details these days. But she remembers her face had been stony, still, unmoving, unaffected. The man nameless, faceless as he pushes crimson silk from her lithe frame, as his calloused fingertips touched her without an ounce of knowledge as to what kind of jewel he was holding.

Her lips press together tightly, she feels the matte texture of her lipstick between them. She pauses so she might think, might craft the correct response. It’s then that she decides playing a part might suit her well here. A breath of a laugh, a feigned bashful tuck of her hair behind her ear, “My mind’s certainly drifted, hasn’t it. What was the question again?” A fluttering of lashes, a softened, apologetic smile – the journalist is gracious enough to skip this question, and she thanks him with a deliberate touch to the top of his palm, feather light and barely there.

What are your thoughts on the war between the Capulets and the Montagues?

“War,” she scoffs, the sound gentle but her disdain carrying loud and clear.

Piercing eyes narrow, the winged tip of her kol liner sharpened like the point of an arrow. “It’d be just like men to start something so barbaric with no end in mind.” To her it was illogical, to waste time, resource and more importantly energy, on the maintenance of a petty feud. There is nothing worth fighting for, she’s realized, if not for love or for power. And she liked to think the Montagues and Capulets fought for neither. There were by far better things than to focus on – the creation of empires, the falling of others, she thinks.

“It’s primitive. Dated. If they want to continue on in this matter they might as well fight over Twitter about it.” Another pause. Her fingertips coming to her lips, as if the words had come out too soon before she could stop them, “But, you didn’t hear me say that either.”

Extras: If you have anything else you’d like to include (further headcanons, an inspo tag, a mock blog, etc), feel free to share it here! This is OPTIONAL.

PINTEREST BOARD

QUOTES:

“How many women are you? he asked. A legion, I said.”

“BELLADONNA, n. In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.” – Ambrose Bierce

“Men love me cause I’m pretty – and they’re always afraid of mental wickedness – and men love me cause I’m clever, and they’re always afraid of my prettiness – One or two have even loved me cause I’m lovable, and then, of course, I was acting. But you just do, darling –” – Zelda Fitzgerald

“She is her own heroine—capricious, exacting, exquisite, very learned, and beautifully dressed.” — Virginia Woolf

“She’s a very mysterious creature, with an open smile and a closed soul.” — Colette, from a letter to Madame Léopold Marchand

“She carries herself like a god. She is a composed ocean of waves that could become turbulent if you test her.”

HEADCANONS:

TV TROPES: Brainy Brunette, Silk Hiding Steel, Broken Bird, Femme Fatale, The Chessmaster, Passive-Aggressive Aggression, I Have Many Names, The Charmer, Ice Queen, Faux Affably Evil, All Girls Are Lustful, Honey Trap

CHARACTER INSPO: Catwoman / Selina Kyle (Batman), Hathor (Gods of Egypt), Commander Lexa (The 100)

AESTHETICS: She’s fur trimmed coats and heels as high as her standards. She’s a touch as warm as a crackling fire with a stare as icy as the country from which she hails. Chin tipped up proudly as she balances a gilded crown no one can see but knows is resting atop her head. Her voice is like honey, and her laughter like wisps of smoke, tendrils floating airily above ruby-painted lips. Piercing eyes assessing and calculating, who might she charm next with the knowledge carved into the walls of her mind like hieroglyphs? The answer is: everyone.

Her mother Tatiana Sokolova was a widow and school teacher. Her husband, Mischa, died long before she could conceive a child. It was his only wish, his only hope, that they’d grow their little family in Irkutsk, that one day he’d drive his truck route through the snow long enough for them to have enough money to move to St. Petersburg. It’s a dream he never got to see into fruition, God knows they tried their best, but Tatiana always felt that she’d failed him. It’s why she’d prayed so hard, why she’d wish upon every star, why she’d memorize the scriptures until she knew them by heart, because if she prayed to her gods and believed hard enough – miracles could happen. And when her little miracle did happen, Tatiana only wished that he was around to see Calina grow, see her excel – he would have been proud of her, the woman always said.

They say curiosity killed the cat, and despite knowing that fact, Calina grew up ever curious into her original background. While she never sought for her parents, she did seek answers about her heritage, her ancestry. Taking a test, she finds that her roots lie in the motherland of Africa’s tip and in the desert sands of the Middle East – it’s only logical then that she learn Arabic, that she research the customs of such drastically different cultures, if only to feel closer and more immersed into them. One of her many dreams: to visit both Egypt and Morocco one day.

Showing the early signs of a cerebral child, a gifted child, reading was always little Calina’s favorite thing to do, always by far more excited than her classmates to get the summer’s reading list. She was the type of child who would live in the library if she could, taking out stacks of books only to return them by the week’s end because she’d finished them all, and even went through a few of them twice. It’s a habit she could hardly shake well into adulthood, as the Montagues have now become accustomed to finding her beneath the ornate embellishments of headquarters if she is missing for any period of time. To her, there is no shortage of knowledge, only fools claim to know it all. (But let’s not mistake, she knows by far more than the rest do.)

Her mother showed her how to do everything, Calina acting as her permanent shadow as she trailed behind her. She knows how to cook the perfect solyanka because she’s hovered over her mother’s shoulder while she stood at the stove. She knows how to knit her own scarf, because her mother only seemed to have the energy to calmly knit as she got sicker and sicker, and she’d help her knit-one and pearl-two when her bony fingers couldn’t go on anymore. She knew how to tend to chamomile, if only to brew the delicate flowers into steaming soothing tea, because her mother watered and sang to her plants religiously at the windowsill, and she’d do the same. She learned Ukrainian because that was her mother’s second tongue, almost spoken in their home more than Russian.

Her interests are vast and varied – a modern Renaissance woman. Languages are only the beginning. She enjoyed mathematics, was fascinated by history and geography, and marveled constantly at art. Growing and learning, she couldn’t put a finger on her favorite subjects, as she only wished to consume as much knowledge as she could.

When she does make it to Novosibirsk, Calina goes straight into state university, with the hopes to secure a job once her certificate was in her hand. She studies Linguistics, with the hopes to become a translator, maybe one day able to work for government agencies in her country or across the globe – the United Nations was one dream, among many. But she soon learned that dreaming was for the naive. Due to the illness of her mother, and no one to care for her, she has no choice but to drop out of school, and uses the remaining funds from her tuition payments to take care of hospital bills, their rent, and an decidedly ornate urn when her mother eventually passes. Her ashes are floating through the depths of the Baltic Sea by now.

A brilliant linguist she becomes, with a talent for rapid language acquisition, Calina is skilled in six languages: her native Russian, English, Ukrainian, Bulgarian, Arabic and Italian most recently due to her new ‘business’ ventures.

She alludes some her knowledge to her lovers. Sometimes her customers were sweet, in the exchange for her affection they’d wish to bring her gifts – all she’d ask for was information. A new language to learn, a new book to absorb, a new code for her mind to crack. She learns Bulgarian from Stanislav, as he purred it her ear until she could purr it back. Dariya, her favorite, shows her that English is not as difficult as she thinks, leaving her poems from authors even greater than herself. Is brought hardcover books with gilded spines and Arabic lines from Adrik, and she’d lift his delicate round spectacles so she might press her lips to his eyelids. It was her little way of making better of the horrid situation she found herself trapped in.

It had become an inherent part of her, a subconscious thing for a girl like Calina, to analyze and categorize those she interacts with according to a specific criteria, especially so once she was inducted into the Montague ranks. When she encountered someone new, she’d ask herself a series of questions that would determine their suitability of her attention: What can I gain in this relationship? What can this person give me? Most importantly, will I be willing to part with them if need be?

Dependency is her greatest fear. To live in a world where she cannot save herself, where at every turn a man will be there to rescue her, is not one she can see herself existing in. Which is why she’s more than keen to learn how to better defend herself, how to better weaponize herself and stay protected. But she’s yet to voice such desires, waiting to see who she might best employ to assist her.

Currently, she calls the Verona embassy her second home, more time spent there than beneath the roof of her own apartment. She serves as a translator for foreign dignitaries, her charm and clear command of language makes her shine at meetings to discuss ranges of topics, from foreign policy and international trade to criminal justice and matters of Verona’s security. It’s a strategic move on Damiano’s part to place her there, to be the eyes, ears, and soothing guiding voice of influence that is necessary as far as local and international governments are concerned. It’s no secret her mind cannot be resisted, and it makes all the better for the Montagues to have friends in such high places.

ARCHETYPES:

45% INTELLECTUAL – Thriving on intellectual pursuit, with a defining grace of wisdom, the Intellectual is the ultimate dinner-party guest. Engaging questions and thoughtful debate are their trademarks. They are your sages – imparting their wise words only learned through time and experience. The Intellectuals can be your scientists – juggling a plethora of ideas in their minds, willing to listen and engage in conversation so long as it properly stimulates their intellect. They are your scholars, your polymaths – brimming with bright curiosity for all aspects of life, collecting knowledge in all its forms. But they can also be your judges – masterful arbitrators, sharp and impartial, slicing through the heart of matters to create balance.

35% PERFORMER – Center stage. In the spotlight. Entertaining and exuberant. Flourishing in the face of attention and applause. The Performers are your provocateurs – walking sirens, with charm and unabashed sensuality on their side. They can get anyone to do anything for them with just the right string of words, the right look, the right touch. They are the pretenders, the seducers – dishonesty is a language they speak well, using it to sway the foolish into giving them their hearts. Nothing is as it seems, as they keep you on your toes, teasing you with portions of themselves instead of the whole. But living on the shallow surface can only go so far when it comes to real relationships.

20% ROYAL – Driven by power. On a constant quest to bask in entitlement and luxury. The Royals are your networkers – with esteem, power, charm and more importantly hundreds of contacts at their disposal, they can work any room and cozy up to the power players in it with ease to help push their agendas. They are your queens – ultimate conveyors of grace and elegance, with the ability to lead as examples, empowering those around them (especially women) to succeed. But they can also be your politicians – people-oriented, excellent communicators, with an innate talent for leadership and influence, they firmly understand that their jobs would be nothing without the alliances they can make.

DARK CORE PERSONALITY TEST:

20.11% Darker than the Average Person

TOP DARK TRAITS

MACHIAVELLIANISM (87%) – “Manipulativeness, callous affect, and a strategic, calculating orientation.”

SELF-INTEREST (80%) – “The unprincipled pursuit of gains in socially valued domains, such as material goods, social status, recognition, achievement, and success.”

EGOISM (80%) – “Excessive concern with one’s own pleasure or advantage at the expense of community well-being.”

#accepted: cleopatra #accepted

5 notes · View notes

koganeirou · 7 years ago

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tagged by @manulanii (thank you!!)

Three Fandoms:

Mystic Messenger

Psychedelica of the Black Butterfly

Danganronpa V3

The First Character You Loved:

Saeran Choi................ the moment I saw him in that opening movie I pointed to him going like “Him. I love him. Can I date him?” I was devastated when I found out I couldn’t at the time

Karasuba! Awesome character design and his personality is def my type.

Amami. It’s illegal to be that hot I’m sorry.

The Character You Never Expected To Love So Much:

Jaehee. She went from my least favourite RFA member at the beginning to my favourite RFA member. My girl came so far. Also she has by far the best valentines DLC, fight me.

Monshiro. He was also meh at first too because he’s more of a spoiler character so you barely get any information on him at first. But watching his story unravel in the game and all the plot twists about him being revealed completely floored me. Everything about him touches my heart an his smile is like the sun I would die for him.

KAITO. He’s one of those characters that you can’t help but love and be charmed by because they just have such a good personality. I’d love to meet and be friends with someone like Kaito irl tbh. I can def see why Maki fell for him lmao.

The Character You Relate To The Most:

Jaehee. Her route just kills me because of how relatable it is.

Karasuba. His childhood episodes really hit home for me.

tbh all of drv3′s characters are really Out There so I’m not sure if I’d really relate to anyone. I guess in terms of personality, Himiko’s prob the most similar to me.

The Character You’d Slap:

Rika. Not only would I slap her, I’d pummel her in the mint eye court yard then drop kick her to the sun that she oh-so-loves.

KAGIHA. I DON’T LIKE THIS GUY. I could write a 5 page back and front essay as to why I don’t like him. Even Mr. Actual AssholeTM whom I won’t name is more tolerable than this guy. Def landed a spot in my list of Worst Otome Boys okay from what I know, Kagiha’s pretty well liked so I’m sorry if I made any of his fangirls cry

Kirumi. Girl has her head waayyyyy too far up her ass.

Three Favorite Characters (in order of preference):

Saeran > everyone else > Jaehee > Seven

Hikage > Monshiro > Karasuba

Ouma > Amami > Harumaki

A Character You Liked At First, But Don’t Anymore:

Yoosung. It’s not like I despise him but he’s... also on my list of Worst Otome Boys ever LMFAO but he’s lower on the list so!! I could go on a tangent and make all the Yoosung fangirls cry but I’ll keep my trap shut. ALSO throw back to the time I liked Rika and referred to her as “my type of lady” prior playing Seven’s route R O F L. It feels like such a distant past.

Nobody tbh? I guess Kagiha but mean I never liked Kagiha. I was more so indifferent to him before it became full blown dislike lol.

Kirumi. She was actually my favourite drv3 girl until the second trial and my opinion of her just dropped to beyond redemption afterwards.

A Character You Didn’t Like At First But Do Now:

Jumin. I mean I did like him at first but my opinion of him dropped considerably after playing Jaehee’s route and it was so bad to the point I didn’t even want to play his route. Even now I’ll still fight anyone who defends Jumin’s behavior in Jaehee’s route but Jumin’s a good man and I love him lol.

Beniyuri. She felt like a really meh heroine at first but I couldn’t help but be charmed by her as the game progressed. Also her voice.

Miu. She’s one of those characters whos really easy to dislike but once you put the game down and look at the game as a whole, you can’t help but appreciate her character.

Three OTPs:

In the Mint Eye package, lily of the valley is the flower that represents MC, and lily of the valley is Saeran’s favourite flower. I’m not saying that MC x Saeran is canon, but it’s totally canon.

Hikage x Beniyuri. REMEMBERING THE SHIT THAT GOES DOWN IN HIKAGE’S ROUTE STILL MAKES ME CRY THOSE TWO DESERVED BETTER. Literally after Hikage’s route ended I just sat there on my bed crying as the credits rolled. Also cheating cuz I’m stating another one I also like Monshiro x Beniyuri. Their relationship is really sweet and I think Beniyuri was really at her strongest in his route. It was nice to know just how far the two would go for each other.

Oumeno. I blame twitter fanartists.

#about #this was really fun ty for the tag!!#okay i know this is a rika-hate-centric blog but #i actually have a fair share of negative opinions on a shit ton of fictional characters #i try to keep it lowkey tho cuz i don't want to offend anyone

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killemall1989 · 7 years ago

Note

All of the flowers!!!

well shucks if u insistDAISY: How old were you when you had your first kiss?i was 7 issa living

CARNATION: If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer?fuuuucc either tyler the creator or declan mckenna

JASMINE: What color looks best on you?black (hes a goth bitch)

FOXGLOVE: Name three facts about your family?1. doesnt function well2. everyones sad3. doesnt function well

ALLIUM: What’s the best thing you can cook?chicken fettucini alfredo ??? probably. i am more of a baker,,

ORANGE BLOSSOM: If you could pick the gender and appearance of your child, would you?nah wtf thats weird dude

CALLA LILY: If you died right now, what song would you want to play at your funeral?born again by josh garrels ???? idk man an instrumental of a song def though

POINSETTIA: Favourite holiday dish?gingerbread does that count idk

OXLIP: Would you ever get into a long distance relationship?i mean i have in the past so probably yeah. if the feelings are there and strong.

PRIMROSE: Favourite kind of soup?dumpling soup

DAFFODIL: What’s the most thoughtful present you’ve ever received?a guitar probably

ROSE: Are you currently in love with someone?yeah and it sucks like dont do it

AMSONIA: Would you ever become a vegan?im a vegetarian lmao so yeah if i could manage without dying,, i was vegan before but i couldnt swallow the vitamins my weak body required

PEONY: What’s your favourite hot beverage?german chocolate mocha binch

TULIP: For your birthday, what kind of cake do you ask for?cheesecake

MYRTLE: Do you like going on airplanes?i like airports but not airplanes

HIBISCUS: Did you ever play an instrument? If so what?i play a few ya. as previously mentioned, guitar. violin, which is my favorite. ukulele. kalimba. bass guitar. and i dabble in like… most others

ZINNIA: Who was your best friend when you were six years old?that same girl i kissed when i was 7

POPPY: What color was your childhood home?v faded blue

HYDRANGEA: Starbucks order?none…

VIOLET: Do you like where you’re from?no i dont im from alaska which fuckin SUCKS its the most boring place ive ever been plus its part of america and… dont? get me started?

LOCUST: What was your favourite book as a child?where the sidewalk ends by shel silverstein

RHODODENDRON: What’s the scariest dream you’ve ever had?ooooh boy okay here’s this nightmare i had when i was like seven.so i was at this weird famous landmark (idk it doesnt exist irl); it was a castle and there was a bridge leading to it, but the piece of bridge that was connected to the castle had collapsed long ago. so you could only walk on the bridge, entry into the castle was not permitted as it was sort of in ruins. all that was rly intact was a tower. but anyways there were a bunch of tourists there on the bridhe, and i got lost in the crowd. seperated from my family. so i was like? where is my brother? cause he’s a couple years younger than me and i worry about him. and i heard a cry from that tower, so i freaked out cause it sounded just like him. well i being a delinquent make my way off the bridge and run through the shallow waters to the tower, trying to find him. the towers all stairs so i climb them, and when i finally reach the top it’s just this fucking torture tower and i’m like OH NO. and my brother isn’t there so i’m like OH NO. and i look around and realize there’s a woman in some gown that’s clearly from the same era as this castle. it’s all torn up and stained and such. but she looks young - like 20? so nothing makes sense. she notices me when i stare, and looks at me, and drops what i then notice is a knife she was cleaning. so i freak out and can’t breathe but she keeps staring at me and i’m like wow i’m really gonna die. and then she just starts smiling and she’s like “run.” and i can’t move and i’m worried about where the hell my brother actually is and i don’t run. so she starts screaming RUN! RUN! RUN! RUN! as she walks towards me and i finally get my legs to work and i run, downt the stairs, out of the tower, through the water, and she’s just walking after me, and i’m crying from fear, and i start running through the crowded bridge again trying to get help but no one will listen, and i turn around and see her in the crowd but no one else does, and i run again, and i trip, and she catches up to me and kneels down beside me and she’s like “not fast enough.” and i wake up then, and i’m actually crying, even though it was just a nightmare. but i can’t move. cause i have fucking sleep paralysis. and i start panicking. and i look to my bedroom door. and she’s fucking standing there with that cocky smile. and i think i’m screaming but no sounds coming out. and she’s just there.this nightmare reoccured at least ten times over the course of a year and each time i woke up with sleep paralysis and i saw her in my doorway.

QUEEN ANNE’S LACE: Would you rather carve pumpkins or wrap presents?wrap presents, i love wrapping presents.

MAGNOLIA: Favourite kind of candy?starbursts 500%

ASTER: Would you rather be cold or hot?coldcoldcold i hate being hot like what can i do abt that nothing i wanna be cold gimme blankets

MARIGOLD: Do you listen to what’s on the radio?yes ofc like im not gonna listen to humble

HELICONIA: Do you like when it rains?yes sometimes

AZALEA: What’s a movie you cried while watching?one of the trillion movies ive watched that made me cry was comet that movie turns me into a bitch baby cuz i really relate to a character in it aha

DANDELION: Do you think you’re important?sometimes i do other times not so much

#ask #thecrocdong #long post

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wearethegladiators · 6 years ago

Text

hey

so i could keep on ranting about aron for years because drAMA but i’m just gonna tell you this: aaron paul as his new fc is canon and so is the evans siblings being the evans twins. i’M NOT SORRY

lily still saying aron is his little brother because she was born like 2 minutes ahead of him :) but aron being taller and looking older than his age while lily will forever look like she’s 12 hihi

also the first 30 seconds of this video is the absolutely perfect depiction of aron’s mindset for that time period: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LHpeFfBRF8U like being a kid. a sad, fucked-up, cutie-pie, damaged kid.

one comment reads “the most accurate portrayal of personal hell i have ever seen” and that hurts

also pretty much canon that aron will be alive for at least some time after the virus

i’m digging into the evans family backstory and it’s clear that they always had a connection to magic. like i don’t know exactly how the irish folklore relates to magic (i’m especially thinking druids here), is it like an entre-deux between the magic and the muggle world ?? i read once on a hp forum that irish muggles were pretty much aware of the magic world around them and that it didn’t come as a big surprise because you know, bah they have farfadets quoi. so there were “mixed” villages and magic wasn’t much of a secret. i actually kinda like that?

lily’s parents are more rational (or modern if you will), maybe they live in a mostly muggle city or something. but her grandparents? they live in the highlands, are breeding horses and only communicating in gaelic.

also, the evans have always been fighters. they definitely participated in ww2, maybe even took part in the débarquement (there’s also a french side to the evans family hihi). also they were probably very involved in the civil religious wars, as mediators - or as IRA members ?? because they’re nice, but they’re about ice. and ice does not forgive. a smile made for war is one of the most evans things i have ever read, along with demons run when a good man goes to war.

so anyway maybe her grandparents were even in contact/working with the order of the phoenix during the first wizarding war?? it would also explain the disconnection between lily’s parents and the magic environment. the grandparents tried to protect them by pushing them away from the magical world??

and then boum, liliana. and potentially also aron showing some skills?? (WHY am i thinking of aron as a banshee????)

lily definitely has a banshee vibe. ever since les âmes mortes she always had accurate feeling/foreboding whenever something bad was about to happen. also i can see her scream?? and that sort of mind control through occlumency. like she has some aspects that she may have inherited, but she’s not a full-range banshee. aron??? what if his capacities are more developed than lily on that? also what if he is an occlumens? can muggles be occlumens too???

there’s so much going on in my mind i swear to god

lily rather as morrigan. if the rebellion still uses aliases that’s definitely going to be hers. that fits so well. the queen of phantoms? i mean?

lily/aron’s relationship as echoing so much that of the blake siblings. the unbreakable love but the unbearable resentment. both being convinced that lily brought the plague to the farm where all evans were gathered, and thus killed them all. aron rejecting lily, referring to other members of the rebellion as “his family” and mocking her as “the goddess of the dead”. the morrigan nickname could actually come from him?? also lily having moments of doubt regarding her recent actions/harshness, and someone telling her “you always did what you had to do to protect your brother, that’s who you are”. my heart ???

lily becoming much more ruthless ever since aron joined the rebellion, and her family died, and her people started to go extinct. like really we can tell that there’s been a true escalation of violence for her from that moment on - she will do whatever it takes to save them all, and especially her brothers

lily doing a bunch of stupid things for them

like she’d be ready to endanger the entire rebellion movement to save their asses

and the muggle(born) race, but to a lesser extent (still clarke-and-lever-vibes tho)

lily really going on a personal crusade for months trying to save and gather the remaining muggles all over the country, building up a team to find the survivors and protect them, but also to burn the deceased and give them decent burials (the last point would also be a matter of tension with aron: “burning the bodies really? it’s no fucking zombie virus! you’re the one destroying our people and our culture, not them!”)

aron as part of the “preservation of the muggle world” team ?? i mean this sounds like a very lame name put like that but he’d quite obviously be useful in that mission. what if they even go islands where there are survivors and they just contaminate them and kill them?? the guilt!!

is he living at the rebellion headquarters or in a muggleborn camp? how much does being non-magic impede his daily life, like how many places is he unable to access because of anti-muggle spells??

aron and red???? i just had this thought because krysten ritter would be a great red? like maybe not as a couple, but as a thing at least. he’d care a hell lot about her, and if she dies?? hm hm.

i think i just like picturing aron with terribly strong/extremist women because it is so radically different from who he is? he’s been raised as an extremely kind, respectful, and tolerant child (maybe even too much) who likes flowers and smoking pot while looking at the stars (headcanon in which aron does all of lily’s homeworks for botanique).

THIS. RIGHT. HERE.

mdr remember when i said this thread wouldn’t be about aron

so yeah, even with wynona. he couldn’t stand her being so ostracized by the others, and it’s no secret that aron likes kids so damn much, so he’d be terribly disgusted by her actions but would still take care of her brothers and sisters - and would eventually understand ?

also, if he also adopts a kid at some point, well he’s definitely going to bring him to the blackbird ranch

the blackbird ranch as une garderie

mdr that would also mean that aron and nathan could be found chilling out around the blackbird ranch -- my heart

wynona lifting magical anti-muggle barriers surrounding the ranch especially for aron!!

so yeah anyway wynona and aron. in a paradoxical way he forgives way more things to wynona than he does to lily. and wyn would try to fix their relationship. also aron could (try to) provide muggle solutions to her “leg problem” ? (wynona is legit afraid of muggle technology and savoir-faire, but also very eager to learn about it, soooo)

also this definitely implies aron/sacha?? i mean. i think that would be a super interesting relationship, because they would definitely be best-friends in a “normal setting” ?? but this is war, aron manages to get close to wyn when she refuses to complain to sacha, sacha manages to get close to lily and?? i don’t know, i see a great friendship, but also with a weird, nostalgic avant l’heure vibe to it? two kids who grew up too fast and now struggle on behaving as such. genuinely enjoying and supporting each other, but also the presence of the other is a reminder of what they’re going through and who they could have been? am i even making sense oh god

btw i always thought that sacha must have been close friends with fenugreek, and so was aron? they could have been sort of a trio, and fenu’s violent death would add yet another variable to their relationship

do the magical creatures of wynona know aron is non-magic and if yes how do they react to him

mdr btw i also thought about the blood transfer thing, i appreciate how we are both trying to save him

anyway there’s definitely some type of old/irish magic protecting him to a certain extent, i guess

the power of LOOOOVE

100% agreed i like the trope of “love is greater” so much?? like that’s cheesy but i’ll never get over it. we do terrible things for the people we love. lily and wyn are such goods examples of that. (“i was a mother and now i’m a monster”)

speaking about love nathan and the evans ???? yeah, he’d definitely be introduced as a cousin to neighborhood/family dinners. he would be the miguel of the family hahaha

mama evans adopting nathan as her third kid and sending him packages of food, or scarves she has knitted!! making sure he’s okay even when he’s away and harrassing lily for some news. pretty sure she has already invited nathan to the kinsale house while lily was still in hogwarts? like now i’m picturing aron/mama evans/nathan dinners and???

nathan spending a few weeks at the evans home every summer, with the evans twin carrying him everywhere and being over excited to show him muggle things?? the awkwardness of nathan, and the evans twins running everywhere with excitement?? mdr they must have been so happy and having so much fun and now look at them

sorry

evans twins getting nathan to smoke pot

evans twins always getting into trouble and nathan having to always make up for that

nathan coming to the grandparents’ farm!! where they only speak gaelic and look weirdly at him and always seem grumpy, but eventually they adopt him and give him a horse and now grandma evans is also sending him packages ??? (grandpa evans is still speaking gaelic tho, but he’s trying to be a bit more understandable. just a bit)

nathan being overwhelmed with packages from the evans mdrrrr

that’s def my new favorite trope here. nathan in the middle of this happy bubbly blondy family. yES

(what do you mean all your evans are dead now, shhhhh)

sans transition MUDBLOOD CAMPS??? i saw this coming but i’m still shook mdr

so i’m 100% FOR SACHA AND LILY TO MEET THERE??? these camps are pretty damn good at dehumanizing people and making them lose all hope, but if lily comes across a baby-like-aron that would give her a reason to fight back, and yes start mobilizing people, starting to spread across words and songs of hope and??? yes. sacha and lily as badass community organizers??? yes² i lOVE THIS

also lily contacting the rebellion/nathan once they escaped and being like “yeah i’m with about a hundred escapees rn, is there anything you can do or? we keep on saving ourselves?”

“it’s my people BITCH”

that’s the moment when she started using a rhetoric of “my people”. that’s the moment when she embraced her muggleborness, completely changed her looks, and started to harden her stance. “someone has to save our skins/i bear it so they don’t have to”

mdr lily and sacha, those skinny kids, leading their people to the rebellion can you imagine the badass scene

“yes we did this ourselves”

most of the people that escaped that day now have important functions within the muggleborn rebellion and they have sort of an added “street-cred” because this shit was legen…wait for it...daryyyy

i don’t know why this makes me think of “acide sulfurique” by amélie nothomb. but this does

also adrian can 100% join the muggleborn resistance, lily would be so glad, i’m pretty sure she has a hell lot of respect for that man. oh what if she’s the one influencing him to join the movement??? i swear she has some slytherin vibes now

how “‘fun”’ is it that lily now has slytherin vibes and nathan has gryffindor vibes right

also so sad about alice!! she was the purest. and i’m pretty she already took care of lily before the war cause you know, the girl always has broken ribs, or arms, or legs, or whatever. she would have looked up to her a lot, that’s saaad. like this is must have been so traumatizing for the rebellion, losing her

“nathan is a wolf, a dragon, a wildfire, a liar, a survivor” damn i’m into it.

it’s so sad seeing this délitement of the leaders but i guess it also makes sense? it’s war, people change, people die. bouhouhou

also YES carmen/lily, i always thought this would be an interesting relationship to explore. like i have this scene in mind when lily just got rescued by the rebellion, she’s quietly sitting somewhere at the headquarters, carmen is suspicious of her and thus try to enter her mind, and lily feels it, stares at her and mentally kicks her out?? like the rivalry from that on. carmen going up to nathan and being like “wtf is your sister, what’s the deal with her occlumencia??” and nathan being like “tf” cause lily never told him hahahaha. so carmen staying superstitious, especially with lily being a little naive kid and yet having survived captivity and torture for months, until some event (yet to be determined) happens and a mutual respect is instaured between them. lily could even become sort of carmen’s second?? that would be a super weird association but i’m here for it? also they could have stayed in touch after carmen left the rebellion, but if carmen’s more “team nathan” i guess they see each other less now? or maybe like i said carmen would be sort of a mediator between nathan and lily? can you imagine??? the kamoulox???

also i need to think about the carmen/wynona relationship. i guess loads of fights but also potentially loads of laugh? they could along pretty well even though this would requires a mutual ass-beating every once in a while. are they drinking buddies now or what? has wynona contacted carmen only recently after silence radio for years to discuss whether or not she should go back to the rebellion? so many questions!!

what if she shows up at carmen’s place without telling her (bc she’s not into that crap) and nathan is already here mdr. the awkwardness. sorry bye

also ofc wynona has been great friends with red for years, probably ever since hogwarts. it may even be for her that she decided to engage in the rebellion. she was there when red got arrested right after her quidditch game and knew she would probably be executed/détraqueurisée asap so she did what wynona does: coerced kyran, found her way to the rebellion, helped them to invade the ministry and make it go boom.

mdr this girl arriving outta nowhere with a plan to get the mofo ministry of magic exploded is so wynona. also insisting on having “faucon” as her first and foremost interlocutor because she quietly stalks them and knows that he’s the most likely to be interested. always had this scene in mind in which the first meeting didn’t go so well because egos™ and they almost ended up fighting and she refused to give him the plans?? and then she’d have regrets, show up to a meeting through another intermediary (let’s be real she must have so much friends gravitating around the rebellion), just quietly put the plans on the table

also the plans include the lists of the prisoners and lily’s on it??? wyn didn’t know who lily was to nathan but can you imagine?? maybe he thinks she did that on purpose hehe (but she really didn’t have a clue) (she might be bluffing about it because wynona blackbird™ confidence, you know)

tbh wynona probably was friends with….. milo, too? can you imagine. ACTUALLY can you imagine her trashing milo one day like “that idiot got killed for shit” in front of lily cause she doesn’t know?????? btw she’s definitely the type to have hooked up with him at some point. mdr. can you imaGINE

wynona and sacha!! mdr i legit hadn’t thought of “how to train your dragon” but that would be so cute and such a good example actually

omg daenerys!wynona

into

the thing is i always thought of wyn as an incredibly Cartesian/utilitarian character so she would always take care of her dragons equally, professionally with just a bit of affection (cause she’s a breeder, she knows she’ll eventually have to let them go), and having no favorite dragon whatsoever

but now?? i legit want her to have a dragon just so that he/she can blow in nathan’s face when he’s being an ass??? :)))))

also is nathan gonna be like this with dragons

mdr sorry so i was saying that yeah, maybe she has a dragon. like an orphan that she found completely by chance while she was at her lowest/darkest, and he/she sort of helped her “bounce back”? she raised him/her secretly because even though i doubt she is still providing much dragons in these times, she’s still trying to be a professional? so maybe even sacha wouldn’t know about this, until he/she starts to become too big/show up at the blackbird ranch even though he/she isn’t supposed to and wyn is like “hmhm. yeah. so i do have sort of a dragon hihi”, and then he/she starts following her everywhereeee

can it be like the bébés oies who adopt a human and believe that human is their maman oie?? what if the dragon believes wynona is a dragon, just really bad at spitting fire

I’M DISGRESSING

i’m actually pretty sure that wyn has stopped her “commercial” activities, just closed and hid to the public her ranch and is now keeping all her dragons hihihi + the ones people are bringing her eventually

she may be educating them to fight/support the rebellion but at the same time she’d be afraid for her bbies?

like she always loved her dragons so much but she had to keep a certain distance from them in order not to be too sad when she has to let them go. but now?? since she’s keeping them?? mdr she’s legit going to raise them as her kids, with toys and decorated paddocks??? like she would be so gaga hahahaha

can you imagine a baby dragon being born at the ranch and wyn offering that baby dragon to sacha and sacha giving back the fully educated dragon to wyn so that she can fly with him/her???? bitch my hEART

also wyn going to see the dragon/taking care of him and loving him so much already because he’s sacha’s baby without knowing he’s going to be hers??

plus if sacha didn’t know about wyn’s personal dragon that means she has two dragons now, full daenerys!wynona bitch

mdr and then sacha giving his dragon to wyn would be so full of tears on both sides like? actually that may be the moment when she realizes how she pushed him away and is feeling so bad about it? and she’d be like “no bby keep your dragon come on--WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE’S VOICE-OPERATED???”

right in the feels, i don’t want sacha to be sad :(( she would push him away because she feels like she has a duty to protect him and can’t do it anymore and doesn’t want the roles to be reversed!! poor baby!! like she’d avoid him on the ranch and shit because she’d be “ashamed”? sâd!! (btw sacha potentially never seeing his parents again??? gosh wynona just needs to be there for him she’s gotta wake up!!)

but wynona would love this dragon so bad!!

what if both her dragons have a baby and she gives him to sacha?? or anyway she’d literally travel the world to find him a new baby lol

wyn disappearing for two weeks bc she just went to romania to get a new badass dragon for sacha, b y e

i don’t know which wynona is my favorite now between bigsis!wynona, daenerys!wynona and rebel!wynona?? rebel!wynona is terribly efficient but terribly scary tho mdr

she’d definitely earn the “most likely to slap you in the face” award of the rebellion hihi

we do terrible things for the people we love !!!!!! yes !!! and the angst when coming back to the rebellion ouloulou i’m so not ready. like the simple fact of showing up to a meeting, trying to be discrete when she used to be the annoying f*cker always interrupting the plans, and yet everyone watching. or like everyone going silent for a few seconds. woooo

or maybe she came back when they found edan, so she was kind of like a messiah to calm everyone down? or to take part in the rescue mission of edan??

mdr this thread is just me asking questions to myself i’m sorry

just let my girl be one of the good guys ok thanks

calling the auderic out on a Men are Men™ basis is a mood tbh

and i actually kind of stan ydria?? i mean. “she’s a witch and a bitch and a pirate”. i’ll take ten of them thanks

gosh this family is so aesthetically pleasing i swear to god

nathan has native american blood??? what the hell??? does wynona know that??? i’m not okay (btw i really need to dig into the native american magic and tradition blackbirds may still be using) (the blackbird ranch is quite obviously filled with native magic so yeah) (woo i’m excited!!)

i really want nathan to have a boat and lily being allowed to steal it. can you imagine them travelling to ireland by boat?? BADASSES. also lily can’t transplaner hein, so at least it would be practical

plus the evans also have a deep connection to the sea, at least originally? they always lived by the sea, loads of them still probably are fishermen or lighthouse keepers or something? and they probably used to fight on the sea, too. i actually imagine the evans as somehow descending from a vikings lineage?? is it because i love lagertha too much and she fits right into the evans family aesthetic?? yeah. pretty sure they have nordic origines too. so anyway BOATS ARE COOL ™, let nathan get one for 2k19 thanks.

magical tattoos!!! i think lily mostly have muggle tattoos, but wynona is definitely covered in magical tattoos. (i mean all blackbirds have at least a couple magical family tattoos, so that’s a thing) why they all so stylish tho, i like that. the line everytime someone gets killed is a real thing too tho. both wynona and lily may have one, i need to reflect on it (cause lily would be covered in it hahahahahah) (i’m not okay)

sacha and tattoos!! i had never thought of it but i’m here for it!! (i’m here for everyone having tattoos anyway. even aron probably has a couple of small tattoos)

i have never ever imagined nathan wearing white and i’m so here for it?? woaw. i’m shook. it was pretty logical for me that lily would go back to wearing white after the war but nathan?? po wer ful.

nathan having dogs!! yes!! i love dogs i’ll take A HUNDRED of them

does lily have any cool animals?? i don’t think so, why doesn’t she get to be a cool kid?? maybe an augurey cause hm, accurate, but i’m not even sure. she’d love a dog but actually i think she’d be too afraid to lose him/her at war, like no way

i mean, she used to have a horse. what happened to the horses when she burnt the evans farm??? did she let them go, sold them, killed them in case they were infected too (cause it was pretty early on and we probably didn’t know shit yet about the virus), brought them to the blackbird ranch??

oh maybe the evans had a dog!! aron sure has a dog anyway, a very good boy that’s pretty much the only that can still make him smile the way he used to. or maybe a cat, but i’m rather thinking dog here. is aron a cat or dog person??

the blackbird ranch is a true noah’s ark i swear!! they have thestrals and hippogriffs and dragons and niffleurs, maybe they have also wolves hanging around? i mean, they’re a native american family you know. i don’t know. if yes, nathan go and help yourself (have i already said that nathan x wolves is a freaking aesthetic)

willy!! i love her!!

gosh why am i seeing parallels between willy and aron. stop it

i forgot willy had killed herself btw, gosh seeing the evans twins having suicidal tendencies must be so traumatizing for nathan

100% here for him to have a baby girl tho, pls get a wife already

weirdly enough i really don’t want lily to be a mother anymore, when she wanted so much kids when she was younger? and also, she always said she was fighting for the greater good, for the future of her people, for her future kids. but now she’s just thinking about the others’ kids? she sort of gave up on that. also it’s terrible for her to see children in times of war, so as much as she’d try to protect them, she wouldn’t be a Mother of All™ like aron or wynona or even nathan would be. interesting much!!

i mean anyway she’s been through so much physically she may even be sterile at that point :))

angelica is such a cool name

that really wasn’t related at all to my previous point, i’m a free bird yo

sacha as an artist!!!!!! yes!!!! lily is a true artist too, and the other day i was thinking about how this relates to her clumsiness. because i can see her playing music (irish harp!!), dancing (danse de salon ofc that’s what she does and also classic irish dances), and painting (so much!!). also doing sports, but she’d be pretty bad at it. actually she’s hyperactive so most of the time (before becoming an occlumens) she just didn’t pay attention to things, and thus did break things or fell badly while running. but hyperactives are also a bit monomaniac and can get super involved/obsessed with a single task and that’s what art would do to lily!!

also of course lily singing all the time, not necessarily great but with great spirit!!

that would be sort of her singing voice btw: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrPHeRvmjqM&index=23&list=RDQMJzRQHxdVDcA can you imagine her singing that at the headquarters of the rebellion though lmao i’m not okay

so sacha and lily producing art in the middle of the chaos???? count me the fuck in

some additional thoughts regarding secondary characters:

fury!! i had this character in mind for so long!! he’s based off that norman reedus pv i had created on silver and opals. a ruthless rebel, with the face of cillian murphy or tom hardy (or, as originally planned, rami malek or norman reedus). irish also!! or maybe welsh. speaking/understanding gaelic anyway. and he’s like… what gus was to lexa in the 100? to lily. he’s the one who found her at the ministry (and so the one who got his ass kicked by her hihi), and ever since that he saw something in her? like when she mercy-killed fenugreek when no one else wanted to do it because he was a kid, he went like “always knew the kid had more balls than the rest of you”. and so he gradually became her back-up, her trusted man following her everywhere. he saw her power in the rebellion back when everyone thought she was just a weak child that had survived because everyone had pity for her. and ever since that he follows her, including in the muggleborn resistance, trying to keep her alive even though she’s so good at getting into trouble hihi. sort of a good little knight by his queen side.

btw is the muggle-born resistance movement a non-mixed movement? like are non-muggle/muggleborns wizards allowed in it?

anyway, and so yeah lily sort of gave hope to the very very hopeless person that was fury. he saw the light in her and is holding on it. actually there is so much mystery and imaginaire surrounding lily and her past that some people like him could actually fetishize her? make her into a sort of a messianic figure, and she would freak out so much, like wth stop it i preferred when people thought i was a small weak child!! but at the same time it’s a good way to control people and make sure they do what she thinks is best for them?? i don’t know?? but that would make her leadership very different from that of the rebellion for instance

can we talk about how everyone used to genuinely love lily and now everyone either hates her/wants her dead OR is obsessed with her in an unhealthy, fetishizing way?? can she have normal, non-complicated relationships in which people just appreciate her for who she is and not who she appears to be??? this is legit saaaaad, even her relationship with her brothers is going through ups and downs now. maybe the previous leaders really did appreciate her, but they also probably pitied her, and they’re out of the radar anyway for now. i’m actually rooting for sacha i guess? pls be a normal cool soft friend

i guess the relationship between fury and nathan would be interesting as well? they have common points and they both care a lot about lily; also fury has sort of “taken” nathan’s role as lily’s protector. is there tension, is there cooperation? i dunno. but fury has an undying loyalty towards lily and god does my girl need that

also the blackbird family!! they have a secondary branch that’s more leaning towards the deatheaters, maybe even working actively with them by now. that’s pure pragmatism, they’re done being killed and they think it’s the best way. the branch is headed by one of wynona’s cousin (who i originally thought would have the face of bob morley hihi) since the parents are also dead during the blackbird massacre at the very beginning of the war. they hate each other. some secondary-branch members have left it to join the blackbird ranch. maybe some of wynona siblings have done the other way around?? i always thought one of her sisters (marie avgeropoulos!!) would go rogue and join the deatheaters, and that they would eventually have to fight to death bah because otherwise it’s not funny hein

what’s originally the place of the blackbird family within society?? they’ve always lived a marginal life by choice, because they just don’t like british people, but they’re also purebloods! is there a pureblood council now and should they get a seat at it? were they ever invited to pureblood events/parties? wynona could have been the legal representative of the family at such events for some time, can you imagine? i really really need to exploit that

what is the american branch up to? do they have contact? are they coming? they’re the really scary ones. wynona may have gone rogue but she sure kept (most of) her family in check.

and yes, them being friends/allies with the macfusty clan!!! yasss

ok how freaking long is this??? i really got zero self-control lmao. brace yourself anytime for a thread that could constitute an entire book. wth. my brain’s a total mess.

xoxo, gossip girl

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itshyejung · 6 years ago

Text

She Loves Me, She Loves Me Not - Chen Linong

Type: Scenario

(Not gonna do genres bc tbh idk how to categorize my scenarios? I guess they’re fluff I mean they’re not rly angsty and def not smut so... just cute? Who even knows lmao)

Characters: Nine Percent Chen Linong x you

(Pics are edited by me so pls give credit. Scenarios are not requested, I came up with all these a long time ago but never really shared them publicly, so hope you guys enjoy! I tried to be creative with each scenario and not do super cliche or boring ones but I think all of them are still kinda cliche lmao...)

The florist’s had never been so busy before, but here you were hauling in boxes and boxes of flower orders your aunt had just placed to keep the stocks up in the shop. There was a large truck in the back parking lot that was filled with many floral arrangements. How many did your aunt even order? Too many to count. There was barely any room left at the display windows, so you had no choice but to push them towards the counter, where they almost crowded the cash register. You would have to deal with them later, there were more out back.

You thanked the delivery man, signed your name on his clipboard, and stood looking disbelief at the ros of pots and plants that were lined at your feet as he drove away. Where were you doing to find the time and spot to put them? With a sigh, you picked up the first pot of orchids and tugged it inside, searching carefully. At least the shop hadn’t opened yet, so you still had some time. However, you had to hurry. Any passerby might see the row of flowers outside an empty parking lot and think it was weird. You checked your watch: 45 minutes until opening hours to move 60 pots of flowers. You were in trouble.

Feeling like an idiot, you ran up the stairs to your ream and began fixing the flower pots all over the floor of your room. Besides, if you ran out of one kind of flower, you’d just have to run right up there and bring one down, pretending it was the second stock room. Right? No one would know. Except maybe your aunt, who was on maternity leave due to her pregnancy, might have a fit when she comes to visit, yelling about how the flowers don’t have proper sunlight and water supply. Speaking of, the ones downstairs probably don’t either. Oops.

You fished around the real storage room for the watering can and took it to the sink, impatiently waiting for it to fill up with water. You had ten minutes lefto before opening time. Hurriedly, you dragged the watering can over to the row of flowers spread in a row under grow lights, lightly sprinkling water over the delicate petals. Why was such a small watering can so heavy?

You stepped back to admire how fast you’d gotten it all done. Then you cringed. Hopefully you hadn’t drowned the flowers. They looked fine; presentable at least. As a florist’s assistant, that was good enough for you. Your aunt could check on it later.

It was a weekend and you had to managed the store, as the only other employee your aunt had hired so far worked on the weekdays when you had school. If this was going to be your potential job, the least you could do was work weekends while your aunt was on maternity leave.

You flipped the closed sign over to open and ran upstairs quickly to bring two more flower pots down, just for presentation. Although there was practically no room on your counter, you managed to squish them both on there without knocking over any of them. You heard the bell ring in front of the store as someone pushed open the door hurriedly.

“Yes hello, welcome to-“ You stopped short in your tracks when you realized just who had stepped foot in your store: one of your favorite regular customers, Chen Linong. He also served as your current secret crush. Your heart bloomed like the flowers in the shop whenever you saw him, and you definitely felt lighter around his presence. There was something about him that distinguished him from other guys that girls usually had a crush on: although he seemed shy, he didn’t care about things like people seeing a teenage boy hanging around in a florist’s shop. No one called him a loser for it either, because they knew a guy like him had his reasons.

“H-hi,” Linong blurted, turning an alarming shade of red in the face. Was he sick? Was it hot in here? Come to think of it…

Maybe the fact that a teenage boy coming to the flower shop was starting to eat at him. But you didn’t mind. You could stare at him admiring your floral arrangements all day, and every day you tried to perfect the arrangements to his liking. “Um, do you need any help finding a specific type of flower?”

“No thanks, I’m fine.” He smiled straight at you… wait, it wasn’t like there was someone else in the room anyway.

“Oh, um, feel free to look around!” You cringed. What were you saying? Didn’t he already say he was fine? Why did you keep bothering him?

“Yeah I will, thank you,” he said and knelt down so that his eye level was parallel to that of a pot of sunflowers. He was so close that his nose was almost buried in the petals. You thought it was a funny image and almost burst out laughing, but then you remembered that you hated your laugh, and besides, you’d rather not disturb the silence in the shop right now.

Just you and Linong… this was the way it should be.

_______________________________________________________________________

The florist’s was one heck of a busy place. Were there really that many people who wanted to buy flowers? All the times you had read about florists in books, they’d always had a quiet, tranquil attitude, not some busy, rushed attitude. Plus, the literal flower boys who worked there were always described so prettily and cutesy and here you were… scared you were going to knock over one of the pots on your counter.

“Ma’am, can I get a pot of lilies, please?”

“I still haven’t gotten my order of a six set amaryllis and astible mix.”

“Do you have any sunflower arrangements left?” Linong grinned crookedly at you and jokingly hid the sunflower pot he was admiring earlier behind his body secretly.

“Yes, I’ll be right there…” you called, barely hearing your own voice. What was it, roses, orchids, sunflowers? Or daffodils, carnations, sunflowers? All you remembered were the sunflowers hidden behind Linong’s body, and you hurried to get them. He had on a yellow sweater today, the same color as the sunflowers, and he sighed like he had been caught red-handed with his masterful camoflauge plan. But he smiled to let you know he was still joking. You rolled your eyes and dragged the damn heavy thing back to the counter, where the first two customers in line stood patiently waiting for their… delphiniums and irises. Sweat peas and lilac.

“Lilies, amaryllis, and astible!” you muttered a little too loudly to yourself, the sound of you snapping your fingers echoing off the walls of the small, cramped shop. You looked around at all the faces staring at you. “I-I’m sorry, I’ll be right back.”

You ran upstairs, oblivious to the fact that Linong was watching you trip over the stairs towards your room in the shop. In fact, there were many things Linong knew that you were oblivious to. There was the fact that he knew you lived up there, on the second floor of the building in which the florist’s shop lay at the bottom of. He also knew that every night, after you closed the shop, you would open the balcony doors to your room, sometimes blasting your music while you did your homework, which the neighborhood never minded of. You’d then water your hanging plants delicately before closing the doors again. Sometimes he rode his bike here, and as he was wheeling away, he would see your figure in the dim light of your room. He knew you lived independently, as you had been given the spare room on top of the florist’s ever since you started working there by your aunt. He knew all these things about your life and yet he still didn’t know how to talk to you.

You appeared at the bottom of the stairs again, dragging the designated flower pots with you and handing them to the right customers. linong sighed, waiting patiently as he rocked back and forth on his small heels, curling his feet along the insides of the rubber soles as he stalled for time. He couldn’t wait to get started with the new project he had planned in mind, and he really needed your help. But it seemed like you were too busy to notice him standing there. A bit dejected, he turned back to the flowers, now remembering you had snatched his sunflowers away. He chuckled to himself and began to browse along the rows, selecting a new flower in his mind.

The sound of a ringing bell and the clicking of cashier keys rang throughout the shop all day. Linong was getting tired of waiting. He stood up and suddenly saw a spare apron hanging off a crooken nail in the wall. He scrambled up to get it and tied it on himself. You looked at him incredulously. What was he getting himself into?

“Let me help you,” he said, sliding into a spot at the counter next to you. You smiled so big you were afraid your teeth would fall out right there in front of him.

“U-um… you don’t have to! I can manage by myself!” You gently pushed him out of the way and busied yourself with rummaging through the coin box to find change for the customer at the front of the line.

“Are you sure about that?” HIs eyes looked so sincere you almost felt bad about lying to him about how tired you were. BUt it wasn’t right to complain to a customer like him about your job. Besides, you’d picked this job because you genuinely loved flowers, and you especially loved your aunt, the professional florist who had given you this job in her very own florist business. She was even nice enough to let you have the small room upstairs. You couldn’t let her down, but… “I’ve been watching you all day, and I’m pretty sure you would love some help, wouldn’t you?”

You blushed madly, unable to believe he’d make you feel this way. “A-ah… whatever you say,” you said hastily, pushing a few flower pots aside. However, you forgot for a second how crowded the counter had been and you knocked one over the edge. Linong was quick to retrieve it, wiping his brow. “That was close, wasn’t it? Now aren’t you glad I came to your rescue?”

You blushed even more. “Sure.”

“Hey, it’s really sweet that you two lovebirds are chitchatting over there, but I need my order urgently, miss!” a lady in a long white trencth coat called from the middle of the line. You and Linong both scrambled a good distance away from each other and began to take care of customers’ needs and wants from opposite sides of the counter. Occasionally, you’d both turn heads to look at each other for a split second, then quickly look away.

When you finally turned over the “Open” sign hanging on the inside of the door, Linong was collapsed on the counter. Luckily, most of the flowers had cleaned away, so his tall frame had a lot of space to lean on. “Wow, I don’t know how you go through this every day. I-I mean the job is nice, it’s just… for a high school student like you, isn’t it a bit, um, too much?” he suddenly stuttered.

You opened another door to a small kitchen and grabbed two cups, preparing to make tea for the both o fyou. “It’s honestly fun work for me. Maybe it’s hard on you a bit, because you’ve never experienced this before, but that’s okay. You’ll find your strength someday and have a career that keeps you going. For me, it’s being a florist. My aunt was the one who educated me in this area, so I’ve always followed her footsteps.” You added water to the tea bags in the cups and carried them out to the main shop. Linong gingerly took the handle of the one you held out to him.

“Amazing,” he said in the most innocent voice he could manage. “Well, it’s good that you don’t mind this job. I think it suits you a lot. I mean, you’re practically as pretty as a flower yourself,” he complimented. You shied away, hiding your face in your hair for a brief moment.

“Hey, I just had an odd question. What are your top seven flower recommendations for girls?” He drained the last of his tea and set the cup down. It shined pristinely, like there had never been tea in there. Amazing. Did he like tea that much?

You were suddenly flustered. “U-uh, I have a list on the business website. You can find it there…. there are pretty much recommendations for everyone.”

“Thanks, Well I’ll be talking my leave now. Take it easy, alright?” He saluted you and backtracked out the door. You saluted him back with a small smile, The way he had voice his question was like he had someone in his mind that he liked. Who was it going to be? Maybe Yawei, the president of the debate team and co-captain of the cheerleading squad: both the brainy and athletic type of Asian. Or maybe it would be Tiancai, that one genius Asian artist who always got praised for her artwork even though she made a mess of it (“Now that’s real art!” the teacher said) and wore paint-splotched clothes to school without a care.

You trudged up the stairs with heavy feet, ready to literally crash into your bed. Then you remembered your lit homework sat untouched in your backpack for tomorrow.

Take it easy, my ass.

_______________________________________________________________________

After another couple of days, you were minding the florist shop as usual when Linong walked into the shop with a slight bounce to his step. Okay, unusual. Maybe he was just extra happy and bright today. After all, wasn’t that what he was known for at school? Being overly optimistic?

“Can I help you with anything?” you approahced him, just like a regular employee at a store would do. He shook his head like usual, explaining that he was just browsing. “In fact, I found a pretty cool flower along the way here. Do you guys have these?”

He held up a daisy and you laughed. “What don’t we have?”

You tended to a few more customers that morning, and sometimes your line of sight would stray over to where Linong squatted. When the last of the morning rush customers had gone, you turned back to Linong. He was like a stray cat that always hung out in your shop and stayed by your side the entire day, doing aimless things. Now, he had that silly daisy in his hand again, only this time half the petals were plucked off and were in a messy arrangement around his feet.

“She loves me, she loves me not, she loves me…” You chuckled as he counted the petals of an odd-petaled flower. Reaching the end, he jumped up and rushed up to your counter. Remembering your job, you also quickly rushed behind it. Linong never bought anything, which you didn’t mind, but you, as a florist, needed to attend to all customer’s needs.

“One orchid arrangement, please!” he said, placing an array of dollar bills and coins on the counter.

“Coming right up.” You reached beneath you and pulled out what you thought had been your best arrangement of orchids and proudly handed it to him. “Here’s your change.” Pause. “For anyone in particular?” You poised a pen over the blank tag on the pot, ready to get indirect dirt on the girl he liked.

“Yes, a very special girl. She’s the most beautiful one, too. Just write that down,” he said nonchalantly. You half-heartedly wrote that on the tag, secretly half-wishing it would be you. Of course it wouldn’t. You bet 60% that it was Yawei, but Tiancai wouldn’t be half bad either.

“Thanks! I hope these will do the trick. I got them from the list of recommendations you personally put on the website, you know.” He winked and left.

Earlier than usual. And little did he know orchids were your favorites.

_______________________________________________________________________

Every day after that he would purchase a new flower arrangement. Tulips. Roses. Delphiniums. Poppies. Asters. And finally, hydrangea. He even requested for a single sunflower. Each day he bought your next favorite. He seemed to get cheerier each day, his hands full of fresh dollar bills and coins. You found yourself forcing a smile each day he came. You had a crush on him so badly you couldn’t stand seeing him take flowers out of your shop for some other girl that he liked when he was the one you liked. How dare he?

Okay, okay, so it was your fault you never told him. Best just to be a regular old florist and not Linong’s secret admirer.

Strangely, on the eighth day, he hadn’t come in at all. With the amount of dedication he had to buying flowers for his girl, you’d think he would have bought something at your shop every day, 365 days a year. But there was no sign of him. Sighing, you flipped the “Open” sign over. You decided to call a few of your friends to help you with a project.

It was another huge flower arrangement order, but this time it was a surprise for someone special. In a few days, your aunt would have her first abby shower with her newlywed husband. This was an event you couldn’t miss, and you wanted to see her after missing her so much on maternity leave. In fact, your flower arrangements had been so successful a couple motnhs ago at her wedding that you suddenly loved your new skill and was soon obsessed with it. Ever since, you’ve had a knack for creating artistic flower arrangements and made the business of the florist shop even larger. That way, your aunt felt that it was afe to hand off major responsibilities to you. Besides, you were almost graduating. Shouldn’t all 17-year-olds have a small, stable job now?

As you waited for your friends to arrive, you heard a soft knocking on the glass of the shop’s door. It was Linong, carrying what looked like a giant lion head. Nope, never mind; in the street light it was more of a giant flower arrangement in a straw basket, with the single sunflower he’d just bought recently sticking out. You opened the door and stepped out into the cold, steam rising from the breath you took. “It looks nice.”

“Isn’t it?” He looked proud. “Thanks to you.” Your grimace dropped. “You really helped me out this time. I owe you. When I gift this to the girl I love, I’ll definitely make sure to give you credit!”

You remembered all those times he had secretly broken your heart, all those times he had left your shop with a new bundle of flowers, all those stupid gooddamn times you had to write “to the most special, beautiful girl I know” on the blank tags while gagging inside.

Your friends arrived soon after and you had to shut Linong out of your life now. He looked a bit disappointed as you ran pu the stairs to your room, beginning to work on the 250 flower arrangements for your aunt’s baby shower. His heart felt heavy as he carried the equally heavy basket back to his house. If only you knew…

The day of your aunt’s baby shower finally arrived, and you woke up worried. You had arranged carpools with your friends to get the 250 flower arrangements to the baby shower location before the actual baby shower started so that your aunt wouldn’t notice. Then you remembered that Linong would be there. Oh, screw him! Weren’t you trying to get over him anyway? Why were you still worrying about him? You struggled to lift the delicate flowers into the trunks of your friends’ cars. On the way there, you discussed your Linong dilemma with them, and they were very supportive in saying that they would stand up with you against him whenver needed.

Finally, everything was in place. Your aunt and new uncle arrived in a sleek black car and even got to walk down a makeshift red carpet of red rose petals. When they stepped out, all the guests cheered at the sight of an obvious baby bump. You couldn’t wait for a new baby cousin. Maybe you could be the next teacher in the family’s florist generation, and you could get to teach your cousin. Unless if he was a boy; then he wouldn’t be interested.

After listening to a long speech about how much your aunt was proud of you, she said, “All these flower arrangements today were made by my niece, and I can’t believe she surprised me like this. Coincidentally, I wanted to surprise her as well for working so hard during my maternity leave. Actually, I had a hand in helping someone else plan a surprise for her. So I’m going to introduce him right now. Her friend from school, Chen Linong, come on up!”

You saw Linong move towards the podium with a large basket of flowers in his arms. The very same flower basket arrangement he had shown you a few days ago.

“Thanks auntie,” he said. “Hi. I’m Chen Linong, and I’m a classmate of her niece who prepared all these beautiful flower arrangements. I wanted to surprise her by making a flower arrangement of my own to confess to her with, although it could never compare to hers. But I hope she’ll still like it.”

He stepped off the podium and the entire audience “aw”ed with enthusiasm. Your heart pounded as fast as a race car’s maximum mph rate as he walked closer and closer.

Until all you could see right in front of you were hydrangea. Tulips. Roses. Poppies. Asters. Delphiniums. Orchids. The single sunflower poking out cutely.

And the smiling face of Linong, the only (sun)flower that mattered right now.

#ninepercent #chenlinong #nongnong #ninepercentchenlinong #idolproducer #kpopmoments #cpopmoments #cpop #idolproducerthings

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lilywoood · 5 years ago

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Hesitate 2/2

So as promised here it’s the final part of Hesitate, it’s a bit longer and I really hope y’all like it ♥️

Tag list : @translucent-bisexual @cherishingstydia @felicitous-one @diazbuckleysworld @gxtop @adamngoodbuck @kajamitt @peroquenotevean @chitownwolf

Words count : 1121

Song : Heal - Tom Odell

——————————————————————-

{Hanahaki} def : A disease caused by heartache, in which the patient would start throwing up petals and in worst case scenarios flowers, to these day only two remedies are known...

———————

Loving Eddie was a curse, a painful yet beautiful curse, one he didn’t want nor needed the cure for, because even if it brought him nothing but heartache, nothing but sadness and sorrow, loving Edmundo Diaz had been the best experience, the best feeling Evan Buckley ever had and he was willing to give his life a thousand times just to enjoy it once more...

—-

In took only one week for Buck state to worsened gravely, he didn’t need to hear Eddie’s voice, or his name being said to start throwing up flowers now, he didn’t need to see him with Lena, didn’t need to hear how his colleagues and teammates were commenting on how close they were, didn’t need to hear them tease him about it, they didn’t know how he felt his heart aching every time they mentioned it, didn’t know how he felt like every breath he took made him feel like dying.

Only Maddie knew and it was more than enough.

—-

Maddie who insisted, prayed, begged for him to consider the removal, who was crying every day and trying her best to keep him alive...

She was in pain everyday because of him, or that what he convinced himself, living without remembering the Diaz family wasn’t the only reason Buck refused to go through the procedure, he was persuaded that if he died maybe Maddie would get better too, she’ll stop worrying, stop crying, he knew she’ll be sad, still she had Chim and at some point he was sure that she’ll make peace with herself, she’ll move on and he’ll be just a memory.

—

He’d lost a lot of weight in the week that followed his conversation with Maddie, he was getting so thin that Bobby didn’t want him with them until he regained some weight, little did he knew that the reason Buck couldn’t eat normally was because his condition made him unable to sustain his body.

He could only nod tiredly knowing full well that in his current state he would only be a leverage for his team...

He was close to the door when he heard Bobby telling the rest of the 118 that they’ll be one man short, heard Eddie propose to call Lena since her team didn’t mind her helping the 118 once more.

He felt the itching come back full force after hearing Bobby whole heartily accept Eddie’s proposition, he felt the bile, felt the lilies and roses petals tickling his throat, he rushed out, run to his car to threw them up, he thought that things couldn’t get worse than that, he was wrong once again...

—-

It was past midnight when he woke up with an ache in his chest so intense he thought he could never recover, he couldn’t talk,couldn’t breath, couldn’t utter a single sound, he felt them the lilies stems piercing his lungs, could feels the thorns puncturing his heart, he felt panicked and dread he felt like death was playing with him and all he could think about was Eddie, how would he tell Chris about his death, would he ever tell Chris, would they miss him, would he miss him, would they be there when he will take his last breath, would he hold his hand, would he smile at him encouragingly so that he wouldn’t be afraid of his impending death.

He had so much questions, questions for which he would never have the answer and as everything faded around him, as he heard the far echo of Maddie’s voice over the phone they were only one single though that kept on running through his mind, he only though about how happy he would be to see Eddie there if he woke up.

——

Maddie was passing back and forth in the hallway of Mercy Hospital she didn’t know what to do, didn’t know who to call, didn’t know who to talk to.

It’s been two hours since he’d been admitted, two hours since the doctor last talked with her, two hours since she last saw Evan and now the nurse were pressuring her, asking her if they could let the doctor know that he could do the removal.

——

She asked for five minutes, just five minutes to call her last hope, her last card, just five minutes to call for a last minutes miracle.

-Yes, she heard Eddie grown tiredly.

-It’s Maddie, she chocked relieved to hear him, I...I need a miracle Eddie, she sniffed, I need you to be my miracle, she cried.

-Did something happened to Buck, he asked dreadfully.

-Can you come to Mercy, she asked in between hiccups.

-On my way, Eddie responded ending the call.

—-

The first thing he noticed when they let him in Buck’s room was how pale and small he seemed, how thin he got, how tired he was...

The second thing he noted were all the machines keeping him alive, the beeping they were making, as if reminding him of how much of a shitty friend he’s been to Buck.

He didn’t know if he was allowed to touch him, to hold his hand, to caress his face, to hug him...to kiss him.

—

As if sensing the other man presence Buck started to stire up, trying to get the oxygen mask out his way when Eddie grabbed his hand.

-Don’t touch that, he smiled tenderly caressing his hand, doctor said you need it, he rambled.

-Am I dead yet, Buck croaked throat sore, that’ll explain why you’re there, he grinned.

-Why...why would you say something like that, Eddie gasped, why didn’t you say anything, he frowned trying to stop the upcoming tears.

-I didn’t want you to worry, Buck sighed turning his head away, plus you were busy with Lena, he breathed quietly.

-You matter more for me than her, Eddie frowned, what made you think otherwise, he asked squeezing the other man’s hand.

Buck closed his eyes taking a deep breath while rubbing his aching chest.

-Maybe the fact that I love you so much, he chuckled throat dry, that you made flowers bloom in my lungs, he explained turning his attention to Eddie,

-Evan, Eddie breathed painfully, why didn’t you tell me, he angrily demanded tears flowing down his face, you idiot, he stated before crashing their lips together.

Buck was breathless after that kiss but this time they were no itching, no petals on the back of his throat, this time when he felt his heart beating faster and his lungs tightened he knew it was because he was loved back.

-I love you Evan Buckley, Eddie assured somehow reading his mind, I love you and only you, he added kissing him one more time

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