#like. why are you doing politics if not for people? who is it for? for the abstract symbolism of moral purity?
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I would love to hear the rant about social media doomerism and conspiracy
Iâm on my phone right now but the summary version is something like:
Humans are bad at integrating information into their worldview accurately bc of various cognitive biases
Social media incentivizes us seeking out content that excites fear or anger or irritation
Social media thus causes us to form negative impressions of the world bc it mediates so much information consumption and discourse these days
This general negative affective impression is subject to high confirmation bias and ppl in general are really bad at divorcing an affective impression of a thing from their dispassionate reasoning abt a thing
(Bc one of the functions of an affective impression is to âcacheâ our conclusions about a topic to save time and effort later)
(In general if you are a cynic and pessimist you can fall prey to these biases w/o social media but I think social media makes more ppl susceptible to them)
People donât want to be dupes so they seek refuge in cynicism. We treat cynicism as wise or worldly when in fact cynicism makes you a dupe and an easy mark for grifters. Cynicism and low trust foster conspiracism, paranoia, and antisocial politics
(This is why so many congenitally contrarian folks seem to flit effortlessly between the far left and far right; itâs not horseshoe theory, theyâve just cooked their brains on this stuff)
This is a world where populist anti-social politicians like Trump and the AfD thrive, bc they will lie about how everything is terrible and people will nod along, bc it explains why their social media is full of awful stories of, like, immigrants eating pets and shit
But it doesnât just have to be insane lies only a moron could believe. It can be any impression about a fact in the world that it is difficult to personally check and which is vulnerable to being swayed by anecdote
This is how we get a word where people think crime rates are higher than theyâve ever been when in fact crime is falling
Or child predators lurk around every corner when in fact children are safer than ever
Or the American economy is in a recession when in fact itâs doing historically well by just about every available metric (now with full employment AND low inflation!)
Because in a big world even where things are in general good and getting better you can always produce infinite individual examples of shitty things and pipe those in a steady stream into peopleâs eyeballs, and then point to that and leverage peopleâs low trust attitudes and their cynicism which tells them they are smarter than the experts and go âstatistics is just a fancy way to lie! The world is secretly terrible! Every bad thing is even worse than you thought and every good thing is a lie!â
(Nevermind the whole phenomenon where anything that is complicated or that someone does not themselves understand gets treated like itâs actually secret and a conspiracy.)
And here I know I have to include some disclaimer about how this is not to discount individual cases of suffering or struggle, which are real, or that there are indeed some really awful things happening in the world right now, which there are, but you know what?
Iâm tired of doing that. People with reading comprehension operating in good faith ought to be able to deduce that general statements do not obviate particular exceptions, and people who cling to their doomerism as a kind of emotional life raft do not generally argue with me in good faith.
Sometimes doomerism is a load-bearing pillar of their politics, which I think is dumbâI think you can be a leftist or a progressive without being a doomer! In fact I think doomerism is antithetical to useful politics!
Sometimes they are just depressed and treatment-resistant. Sometimes they are just angry misanthropes who want to feel justified in their misanthropy. Some doomers are themselves in bad circumstances and feeling hopeless about thatâto them I am enormously sympathetic. Though a lot of doomers will admit they personally are doing OKâthis does not seem to be most doomers.
But I think in general cynicism and doomerism and a worldview dominated by a general nebulous air of Everything Is Awful and by abstract nouns with threatening auras is not conducive to wisdom or understanding or useful politics or leading a happy and fulfilling life.
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claiming terroristic threats is an excuse used not only by the us government, but every government. just like "think about the kids", its a mask, for those who aren't politically or legally literate.
every time you hear one of these claims, or many other similar claims, you ought to ask yourself if they ever had an issue with whatever they claim this new policy/law/statement is claiming, almost always the answer is no.
israel for examoke, is using terrorism a lot, using it to excuse their attacks on freedom of the press, their attacks on teachers, laws strengthening the police and weakening the repercussions they could face, weakening the court system, and paving the way towards legal dictatorship and a world where you either support fully their genocidal plans, or you're sent to some dungeon.
the average person can fundamentally disagree with everything the government stand for, but when the government say "its to fight terrorism" or "its to protect the kids" or any other excuse, the average person listen, and take that at face value, the average person will support the law without understanding what laws like this will allow.
this is something I've encountered a lot, from both pro palestinians and zionists, when I condemned the law that allowed the government to ban al jazeera, and now this same legal basis is used to attempt to stop haaretz, the only non zionist mainstream journalistic outlet in Israel, who regularly interview idf militants to show civilians what the military is actually doing in gaza, and also kan 11, one of the state news channels who recently began to listen less and less to the idf censorship and published more and more anti-war documentaries, and is slowly moving towards the path haaretz took.
every time you hear your government explaining why they want to pass a new law or policy, ask yourself, is this law needed? when was the last time in the past 2 decades this law could've changed something for the better? and what else this law could allow?
the government is not your friend, and it will take advantage of the fact the vast majority of people won't look hard enough, or have the knowledge to understand how to find the real reason for these draconian laws and policies and acts.
even if a judge rule in favor of luigi and briana, the government showed they deem these acts of resistance and defense as terroristic in nature, and they will use as much force as possible to attack you and your community for the ruling elite.
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sukuna and â we have to stop meeting like thisâ plssss
we have to stop meeting like this x ryomen sukuna
**part of my tortured poets concert event
--
âwe have to stop meeting like this.âÂ
sukuna can tell when heâs in trouble.Â
heâs seen the look hundreds of times â when he used to talk too loudly during lectures in college, when heâs late to meetings at work, from his brother when he misses his nephewâs basketball games â to the point where heâs able to pinpoint it down to the expression.Â
narrowed eyes. furrowed eyebrows. a pursed expression.Â
and sukuna can evaluate that, at the very least, heâs not in trouble with you, because you have none of the three, despite the fact that heâs most definitely earned it at this point. a testament to your overwhelmingly large well of patience. if sukunaâs bruised eye isnât betraying him, heâs almost convinced that he sees a whisper of a smile on your face.Â
sukuna readjusts himself in the bed, shifting awkwardly from how small the stretcher is, as you make your way over to his side and pull the shiny blue latex gloves over your hands.Â
âhow else am i going to see you, doc?â he asks.Â
you roll your eyes.Â
youâre not particularly fond of downtown los angeles.Â
thereâs too many people â bustling in the streets, clogging up the sidewalk â to the point where you feel like you see hundreds of people every single day. and while the initial thought of moving was exciting, of the unknown, you very quickly realize that you detest it.Â
you work in an emergency department that houses almost hundreds of patients everyday. strangers going in and out, coworkers cycling through to the point where you can barely remember anyone's name, and itâs a severely stark culture shock from the ten manned hospital you used to work at out in the suburbs. the same few patients you saw every few months.Â
nothing is consistent in los angeles. except for the promise of a local bar owner, by the name of ryomen sukuna, who always tumbles in around the holidays with some type of injury.Â
halloween. new years eve. thanksgiving. a broken arm, dislocated shoulder, a viral infection.Â
âyou know, i almost thought you werenât coming.â you joke.Â
âand miss out on valentineâs day with you?â he asks.Â
you reach forward, fingers light on the side of the face as you guide him to look straight at you, so you can assess the damage. thereâs a deep cut on the side of his forehead, superficial, accompanied by bruising around the soft warmth of his eyes.Â
and while his pretty face is intact, his arm evidently isnât. thereâs a deep gash, one that makes him wince loudly as you touch the bruised skin around it. you narrow your eyes at him, before craning your neck over your shoulder and whistling.Â
âyuuta.âÂ
âyes, dr. l/n?âÂ
you give him a polite smile.Â
âcan you get me a suture kit please?â you ask.Â
he gives you a polite nod, quickly scurrying away towards the supply closet, as you turn back to sukuna.Â
âdonât make that kid do my stitches.âÂ
âwhy not? that kid has to learn, you know.âÂ
âwell, he can learn on someone else, for fuckâs sake.â he mutters.Â
sukuna leans forward, giving you a bright grin, and whispering so quietly it sends a warm shiver down your spine.Â
âyouâve got a special touch, doc. iâm only going to give you permission to patch me up.âÂ
you narrow your eyes at him.Â
âwill you really say no if i make him do it?â you ask.Â
he gives you a nod.Â
âplus, that poor kid has been staring at that girl with the green hair the entire time. you should let them play hooky.âÂ
âi should let my residents play hooky?â you deadpan.Â
sukuna shrugs.Â
âwhereâs your sense of romance?â he asks.Â
you cross your arms over your chest, as yuuta sets the suture kit down on the counter and reaches for the gloves. you raise your hand in the air, gesturing for him to stop, and note that youâll slightly regret this gesture in a few hours when you have to do the paperwork.
âno need, yuuta.âÂ
he gives you a frown.Â
âi donât mind, boss. you should take a break.â he offers.Â
you shake your head at him.Â
âyou should go into my office and go to the desk on the left. thereâs a box of chocolates that someone gifted me in my top left drawer this morning that you should share with dr. zenin.â you note.Â
yuutaâs eyes go wide.Â
âwhat do you mean?â he asks.Â
âeveryone can see that youâre hopelessly pining over maki. including my patient, who has very graciously convinced me to let you be a romantic. get out of my face before i change my mind.â you respond, making your best attempts at a stern voice.Â
yuuta flickers his eyes in between you and sukuna, an unmistakably delighted look on his face, as he lightly taps on the door on his way out. you turn back to sukuna, who now has his eyes narrowed at you as you open up the suture kit.Â
âyouâre telling me thereâs other people that give you gifts?â he asks.Â
you scoff.Â
âyou give me gifts?â you asks.Â
âthe pleasure of my company at your workplace. on every calendar holiday, mind you.âÂ
you roll your eyes as you clean up the area around his skin, pulling out the silk material for his stitches. sukunaâs well versed in your stitching techniques, and with a pain tolerance so high, it only takes a few minutes.Â
âwhat did you do this time?â you ask.Â
âoccupational hazard. who gave you the chocolates?âÂ
you scoff.Â
âwhere do you work? the mma boxing ring?â you ask.Â
âdo you think iâm fit enough for that? more fit than the dumbass who gave you the chocolates?â he asks, a wide grin spreading across his face.Â
you shrug.Â
âevidently not. you can barelyâŠ
you pause to lift the chart left on the table, yuutaâs messy notes scribbled on the top, before you look back to glare at him.Â
â...take down a christmas tree at the bar without injuring yourself. looks like youâre irritatingly possessive too.â you state.Â
sukuna places his hand on his chest.Â
âi told you to take it down earlier when suguru was still in town.â you note.Â
âin my defense, i was protecting my beloved nephew, yuuji, from injury. he crawled underneath and almost got trampled.â he exaggerates.Â
you give him a smile.Â
âheroic.â you deadpan.Â
sukuna gives you a smile, before lifting his hand up to cup the side of your cheek, the touch warm as he rubs a circle into your cheek. you lean into the feeling as sukuna reaches back and fixes the flyaways to the back of your ear, before you return to stitching up his arm.Â
âiâm starting to think youâre injuring yourself on purpose just to spend time with me, ryo.â you murmur.Â
âwould that be wrong, baby?â he asks.
you roll your eyes.Â
âwait for me to come home, dumbass. iâm literally off in five hours.âÂ
sukuna rolls his eyes right back at you, before leaning forward to press a kiss to your cheek. he retreats as you set your forceps down, reaching for the roller bandage as you wrap it around his arm. you secure it with a piece of tape at the end, giving him a squeeze on the shoulder to signal youâre done.Â
sukuna interlocks his fingers with yours, lifting your hand to press your fingers to his lips.Â
âthanks, doc.â he murmurs, tone uncharacteristically soft.Â
you canât help but sigh â the aching feeling of seeing couples doting over each other all day hitting you in full force, that youâre spending your first valentineâs day away from him â as you reach forward and run your hands through his hair.Â
âbe careful. iâm wrapping you in bubble wrap next time.â you warm, reaching forward to lean your head against his shoulder.Â
sukuna welcomes the touch, with three warm kisses spread between your forehead and your hairline, as he shows you the three pictures of the little valentineâs day card that yuuji made for you thatâs waiting at home.Â
you grant him twenty minutes â twenty minutes before you tear yourself from his side to go process his discharge paperwork â and send him on his way. you canât help but sink into the chair the second you see his pink hair dart out the doors, as you type the last of his notes into the chart.Â
âdid the boyfriend enjoy the chocolates?â Â
satoruâs hovering over your shoulder, a bright smile on his face, as he expectantly waits for an answer. you lean back in your chair, heaving a great sigh as you eye the clock. Â
âhe was here, got injured taking down the christmas tree at the bar. and the boyfriend insisted i give them up for okkotsu and zenin. theyâre probably kissing in my office for all i know.âÂ
satoru gives you a polite tap on the head, lightly ruffling your hair, before pulling up the chair at your side.Â
âwell, you should be flattered. sukunaâs so dedicated to spending time with you. so romantic of himself to injure himself just to come down here.â
you scoff in response.Â
âdedicated to being a dumbass is what he is.âÂ
satoru shakes his head.
âi think heâs just a big fan of getting doted on. being cared for, patched up by you, and all that.â
#seeingivywrites!#tortured poets concert event#sukuna#sukuna x you#sukuna x reader#sukuna x y/n#sukuna fluff#sukuna angst#ryomen sukuna#ryomen sukuna x you#ryomen sukuna x reader#ryomen sukuna x y/n#ryomen sukuna fluff#ryomen#ryomen x you#ryomen x reader#ryomen x y/n#ryomen fluff#sukuna ryomen#sukuna ryomen x you#sukuna ryomen x reader#sukuna ryomen x y/n#sukuna ryomen fluff#jjk#jjk x you#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jjk fluff#jjk angst
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Spy x Family Ch. 108: Fear
Don't get me wrong, that panel with Twilight remembering his friends was beautiful. I think he feels nostalgic for that connection with other people. However, I think what really caught my attention in this chapter was Melinda.
Come on, look at this:
Look at this face of terror. And she was just remembering her husband's eyes!
A long time ago, when we just met Melinda, I wrote this theory about her being afraid of her husband. Today, it was finally confirmed.
I feel so sad for her. Melinda has probably been carrying this alone for a long time. I doubt she's shared her fears with any friends or family members because, who would believe the illustrious political leader could be an abusive man? This is especially true if there's no actual physical violence in the relationship. However, like I said before, violence is more than that.
Something tells me that the violence in their relationship is mostly psychological. Donovan Desmond uses his authority to tell Melinda what to do, to create fear, to keep her away from their children.
Melinda appears as such a composed woman who has her life together in front of others, and only someone as emotionally perceptive and caring as Yor would notice something is wrong. There's a shame component in abusive relationships: "How did this happen to me? I used to be so strong and brave," combined with disbelief: "Am I overreacting? Is he really that bad? Why am I afraid of him if he hasn't really done anything to me?"
Hopefully, in time, Melinda will realize that fear is not only her responsibility; even if her husband wasn't physically abusive, his behavior caused her fear.
Without a doubt is a complicated issue, which brings me to something that will probably complicate things even more:
Yup, Twilight.
I'll admit that this is the first time that I felt very uncomfortable with what Twilight is about to do, but that's exactly the point. Good fiction/literature is suppose to move something within us, even if at times, it makes us feel uncomfortable.
You probably imagine why: Melinda is a person in dire need of therapy. She deserves (and needs!) a true professional and instead, she getting someone who is only trying to gather information.
HOWEVER...
Time and again, Twilight has shown that despite his line of work, he'll always try to do the right thing and the least amount of harm. So, I'm hoping he will apply that in this specific situation. My guess is that it will start as a way to get information (his classic "for the mission") but then, as Melinda opens up, he will actually give her good advice and hopefully empower her, as a real therapist would do!
Something else to keep in mind is that Melinda story of domestic violence could trigger Twilight himself in some way, given his own family history. We will have to wait to see how that goes.
Bonus
A final note on Melinda's beliefs in occultism: it makes sense.
I won't comment too much on the specific meaning of the cards because my knowledge is limited and I'm skeptical about that. But I will say that it makes sense that someone with so much fear and uncertainty in her life would believe in something that would bring her reassurance that everything will be okay or try to know the future in order to protect herself. (I really want to give Melinda a hug.)
On the other hand, you know who doesn't believe in that?:
Yup, our dear Becky, who is one of the most authentic character in sxf, who is protected and loved by her parents and Martha. That makes sense too.
#spy x family#twiyor#loid forger#yor forger#sxf#anya forger#loidyor#Melinda Desmond#spy x family analysis#spy x family meta#spy x family manga#sxf manga
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Go read any other shooter manifesto. They are appalling and horrifying reads by and large, but crucially look nothing like this. Because people who commit political killings and then write manifestos explaining why, expecting to be dead or facing life in prison, typically want you to really understand them. They go into detail (gods those things are sometimes a hundred fucking pages long), they have personal history, they describe their methodology and have inciting calls to action for others to do the same. Hell that last one is basically the whole reason shooters write manifestos.
This? Has none of that. There's literally no substance to it other than a supposed confession and desire to save the cops trouble ... and if that's what he wanted he would have just turned himself in and confessed. Which Luigi has not done. The whole thing is basically just, nothing to see here, no suggestions for anyone following in his footsteps, vague commentary about the rich being bad, and the final comment is literally a self-isolating statement which indicates he is the only person feeling this extremely about it, which is not something political shooters ever fucking believe. The almost universally think they are the first vanguard in an overwhelming movement to follow them.
Even if Luigi is the killer and it's proven beyond a shadow of a doubt, I'll probably still believe that this manifesto specifically was planted. This is some grade A nonsense.
To everybody claiming that luigi mangione really is the guy.
This is the manifesto the cops say they found
âTo the Feds, I'll keep this short, because I do respect what you do for our country. To save you a lengthy investigation, I state plainly that I wasn't working with anyone. This was fairly trivial: some elementary social engineering, basic CAD, a lot of patience. The spiral notebook, if present, has some straggling notes and To Do lists that illuminate the gist of it. My tech is pretty locked down because I work in engineering so probably not much info there. I do apologize for any strife of traumas but it had to be done. Frankly, these parasites simply had it coming. A reminder: the US has the #1 most expensive healthcare system in the world, yet we rank roughly #42 in life expectancy. United is the [indecipherable] largest company in the US by market cap, behind only Apple, Google, Walmart. It has grown and grown, but as our life expectancy? No the reality is, these [indecipherable] have simply gotten too powerful, and they continue to abuse our country for immense profit because the American public has allwed them to get away with it. Obviously the problem is more complex, but I do not have space, and frankly I do not pretend to be the most qualified person to lay out the full argument. But many have illuminated the corruption and greed (e.g.: Rosenthal, Moore), decades ago and the problems simply remain. It is not an issue of awareness at this point, but clearly power games at play. Evidently I am the first to face it with such brutal honesty.â
like "ohh yeah we got our guy, he was holding the murder weapon, a manifesto that says "Hey feds! I did that crime and did it with this gun!! this is because the US has the most expensive healthcare but we don't even live as long as some other countries? and its the fault of the american public who I hate!" anne 10 grand! is obvious that this is our guy, and he's just a low down criminal who hates your! the american public"
also if they did find him with that why would he respond to their arrest with immediate legal defense rather than dignified resignation like the manifesto implies.
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there are no bigger babies in this world than punks. for a genre of music (and it is a genre of music, not any kind of coherent political movement, let's be real for a moment) where the fans style themselves to be tough and aggressive, you guys sure love to throw shit fits whenever anyone insults you even slightly. maybe if you were even a little bit anti-capitalist (as many of you claim) in any meaningful way, you wouldn't base your entire identity on consumption of music and you wouldn't feel so mad when someone insults punk or points out that fascists aren't that uncommon among your ranks. then again, the main reason why people are even talking shit about you in the first place is because you're annoying dipshits who base your identity on aesthetics and then huff your own farts about how radical you are, while having politics that amount to an incoherent tantrum.
maybe if you learned how to read political theory, you wouldn't say stupid shit like "punk is inherently leftist/antifascist/progressive", especially when you can do one google search to see how often nazis keep getting into the punk scene. I hope one day you grow the fuck up out of your edgy teenage phase and either learn some actual communist politics or shut up about how radical you are. keep your tastes in music as tastes in music. even though on tumblr half the people who call themselves punks don't even listen to punk.
anyways, if you listen to punk or whatever, I don't care. if you make it your whole identity and try to claim your politics are punk, I urge you to either unfollow me or be very fucking quiet about it. if I catch you saying that shit in my notes I'm blocking your ass.
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In Jake Norton's words...
Among domestic clearer political skies (yes, thank God, it's improving greatly!), it is with much interest that I read Jake Norton's first blog entry about the Everest trek with S and team. You can find it here: https://jakenorton.com/reflections-on-hunku/
Here are the excerpts I found most telling, but I do encourage you to read it all. It is genuine, it is honest and it is real. This guy does not need to sugarcoat anything, indeed - not that mountaineers were this particular type, either.
'An adventurous soul with a heart of gold', who 'rose to it all, never flustered or bothered, always interested and engaged and inquisitive.' Remember (ROFLMAO), this is not Tash, the Twitter Sparkle Lounge madame, speaking from her fangirling mirador at a random OL con. This is what a man with a 30 years experience of high-altitude trekking has to say about his unlikely, but enthusiastic travel companion. And to make the unintended (but honest) Slap-an-Idiot operation even more resounding, he then proceeds to explain why this is not even remotely an indulgent judgement of the character. He could not be clearer about it:
'And, to be honest, my little coffeeshop meeting was both to suss out his interest and let him meet me (and judge me) in person, but also, more importantly, to feel him out. Guiding for me is not simply an economic thing, transactional, but about time and people and experience. Iâve done too many âoff-the-shelfâ trips in the past to have zero tolerance for sharing the mountains with people whose goals and values are misaligned with mine. It took but minutes with Sam to know our worlds, while vastly different, were built upon similar ideas and ideals and approaches.'
He guided S the only possible way one must travel through Asia: with an open mind and an even more open heart. They deliberately ran away from five-stars accommodation (this blogger always combines the humble and the glam, with a noted preference for the genuine 'humble') and graciously responded to the local people's enthusiasm - something that will always be the most beautiful surprise to any traveler who successfully unlearned how to behave like a tourist:
'Unfortunately for Sam, I donât really believe in the sugar-coated version of Nepal; fancy hotels and windowed views of life are little more than television with smell. I want people to see the real Nepal, wander the back streets, immerse in the smoky incense of dawn on cobbled streets, bells chiming and dogs barking, ambling through the visceral reality that is Pashupatinath, taking in the respite of Bodhanath, embracing the comforting chaos of alleys and backways of Lalitpur.'
Reading this made me both feel nostalgic and itchy. For even if you might find me enjoying high tea, in the Bangkok Mandarin Oriental's Author Lounge, my heart will always, always fondly remember the magical nights in a humble Hmong thatched hut at Ban Somsavath, somewhere midway from Vientiane to Luang Prabang. But that is personal and I wouldn't dare mix it up with someone else's experience, so I won't insist. What I can tell you, though, is that I absolutely believe S is honest when he says he will be back: for it is not the traveler that chooses Asia - it is Asia that carefully, deliberately chooses the traveler.
These sounds are mine. They will always resound loudly in my soul, for too many reasons to list here in tearing haste. Why did I add them, though? Because once your plane crosses the Everest, the magic begins in earnest:
youtube
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Trust in the Tension
--buried impulses flare into a fierce, unspoken surrender that no barrier can contain
"Nurse"!Logan x Patient!Reader (11.5kwc)
tw; 18+ MDNI; nsfw, power imbalance; caretaker/patient dynamic; dubcon (dubious consent); explicit sexual content; oral sex; choking; hair-pulling; biting; rough physicality; coarse language; mention of mental health struggles; tears/overwhelm.
a/n: PLS BE AWARE THIS IS A PIECE OF FICTION. (I AM DEEPLY AnD GRAVELY AWARE OF THE SEVERITY OF THIS SITUATION IRL BUT again THIS IS FICTION JUST HAVE FUN or skip.) i also didn't intend for this to be so long... but its been a month since my last fic
not edited entirely; pls like & reblog
Your vision pulsed to the sound of your heartbeat as you took in the scene around you.
You hadnât asked to be here.Â
The facility was niceâ too nice. Plush furniture, warm neutral tones, windows big enough to let in the light but so obviously locked for safety. Despite the place feeling more like a high-end retreat, than a mental health facility that didnât stop the feel of the walls caving in.Â
Still in an unknowing state of shock you sat stiffly in the common room, arms crossed, back rigid, posture so straight it was almost defiant. It wasnât lost on you that you were the only one not participating in whatever exercise the group facilitator had planned.Â
You clenched your jaw as you stared straight ahead at the painting of random splatters on the far wall, the rest of the people fading away in the background. The painting, an aggressive array of white, red, and black splatters meticulously painted to convey some sort of emotion provided you a great sense of comfort. You couldnât put your finger on what that feeling was but you could feel itâ deep in the pit of your stomach. You felt the facilitator's eyes on you, but you ignored it trying to wrap your head around how you got here in the first place.Â
It wasnât voluntary, that's for sure. No, you were here because your parents begged, pleaded, and finally pulled out the weâre worried about you, sweetheart card. Theyâd finally worn you down, leaving you too exhausted to fight.Â
Not that exhaustion was new to you.Â
Professional Burnout was the sanitized phrase theyâd slapped onto your file. As if snapping at a coworker who spent months undermining you somehow made you unstable. As if the outburst wasnât deserved.Â
One crack, you thought bitterly, and suddenly Iâm the problem.Â
The sound of heavy footsteps interrupted your brooding. You glanced up just in time to see a man step into the room, a clipboard in hand and a toothpick hanging lazily from his mouth. He was tall and rugged, with broad shoulders that stretched his uniform and thick sideburns that framed his jaw. He looked like he belonged anywhere but hereâon a construction site, maybe, or some smoky dive bar.
His eyes caught yours, sharp and assessing. You didnât look away, narrowing your gaze in return.
He stood there for a moment, the toothpick rolling between his teeth, sizing you up like heâd already figured you out. You hated it.
âLogan,â he said, finally breaking the silence. His voice was deep and gravelly, with a rough edge that matched his rugged appearance. He tapped the clipboard against his thigh, tilting his head slightly. âYou got a name, or are we just gonna keep starinâ at each other?â
âWhy do you care?â you shot back, folding your arms tighter across your chest.
His lips quirked, just barely. âKeeps things polite. But hey, if youâd rather I call you âsunshine,â that works too.â
You glared at him. âItâs [Y/N].âÂ
â[Y/N],â he repeated, his tone deliberate, like he was committing it to memory. âAlright then, [Y/N]. Hereâs the deal. Iâm the orderly assigned to keep an eye on you, make sure you donât go stir-crazy or claw anyoneâs eyes out.â
You scoffed. âCharming.â
âThanks,â he said, completely unfazed. âLetâs try something newâhow about you actually join the group? Sitting there like a statue ainât doinâ you any favors.â
âIâm fine right here,â you replied flatly, eyes drifting back to the splatter painting.
âFine,â he echoed, his tone dripping with skepticism. âYou keep tellinâ yourself that.â
He stepped closer, his boots heavy against the tiled floor. The closer he got, the more imposing he seemed, like he took up all the air in the room. âBut hereâs the thing, sweetheart. You can act all tough and keep everyone at armâs length, but it doesnât make the time go by any faster.â
You finally looked up at him, bristling at the way he loomed over you, like he was daring you to challenge him. âWhatâs your point?â
âMy point,â he said, leaning in just enough to lower his voice, âis that Iâve seen plenty of people like you. Wound so tight youâre about to snap. Keep it up, and youâll be stuck here a hell of a lot longer than you need to be.â
Your hands curled into fists, nails digging into your palms. âMaybe I like my space.â
His grin was infuriatingly small, almost imperceptible. âSure you do. Let me know how that works out for you.â
And just like that, he turned and walked off, leaving you fuming. You werenât sure if you wanted to yell at him or sink deeper into the chair just to spite him. Either way, you had the distinct feeling that Logan wasnât going to make this easy for you.
â
Later that day you found yourself sitting in another goddamn plush leather seat. You sat stiffly in the chair, arms crossed and jaw tight as Logan settled into the seat across from you. He had the same clipboard as earlier, only now he looked far more officialâstill rugged and casual in demeanor, but with a sharpness in his gaze that said he wasnât here to play around.Â
âAlright (Y/N),â he started, clicking his pen. âThis is just a standard intake. I know you did it before coming here, I just gotta get some background myself, so we know how to help you.âÂ
âHelp me,â you muttered under your breath, voice dripping with sarcasm.
Logan raised a brow but didnât take the bait. âFirst question: How are you feeling?â
You scoffed, leaning back in the chair. âFantastic. Couldnât be better.â
âUh-huh,â he replied dryly, jotting something down on the clipboard. âWeâll circle back to that. What about your usual stress levels? On a scale of one to ten?â
âZero.â
He glanced up, his expression unreadable. âAnd what do you usually do to blow off steam?â
The question caught you off guard. You hesitated, then shrugged. âI donât know. Work. Run. Avoid people.â
Logan hummed thoughtfully, tapping his pen against the clipboard. âNot exactly workinâ out for you, is it?â
Your glare couldâve cut glass. âWhatâs your point?â
âNo point,â he said, the corner of his mouth twitching like he was fighting a smirk. âJust gettinâ to know you.â
He finished scribbling and set the clipboard aside, leaning forward slightly. âLast question. You think you belong here?â
You faltered, his sudden intensity throwing you off balance. âWhat does it matter what I think? Iâm here, arenât I?â
âYeah,â he said, his voice low and steady. âBut if youâre gonna be here, might as well make it worth somethinâ. Otherwise, youâre just wastinâ your own damn time.â
The weight of his words hung in the air as he stood, gathering his clipboard and pen. âThatâs it for now. Iâll see you around, sunshine.â
As he walked out, you couldnât help but feel like Logan saw more of you in that brief exchange than most people ever didâand it unnerved you.
â
You felt the weight of Loganâs questions long after the session ended. Sure they were simple questions but itâs not like it wasnât anything he couldnât look up himself if he tried. The way his eyes had fixed on you, intense and unyielding, had unsettled you more than you cared to admit. You tried to shake it off, but it lingered like a bad taste, gnawing at the back of your mind.Â
When you walked back to the common room, the group session was finally finishing up. Everyone slowly filtered out, but you stayed behind. You didnât want to be around peopleâdidnât want anyone to see how much you were clenching your fists or how your jaw was tight enough to bruise.Â
Sitting back down in your (un)claimed seat, you crossed your arms over your chest and leaned back to stare at the painting on the far wall. Your mind kept drifting back to Loganâs words, his calm, almost knowing demeanor. You hated how easily he had gotten under your skin.Â
It wasnât just the questions. It was the way he looked at you, like he understood everything without you saying a word. You didnât want to think about that, either.
You stood abruptly, deciding a walk through the facility might clear your head. But when you stepped into the hallway, you saw Logan leaning against the doorframe to the lounge, a smirk barely hidden behind his usual indifference.
âLost?â he asked, one eyebrow raised.
You didnât answer, trying to walk past him. You didnât need another interaction, especially with him. But he moved just enough to block your path.
âYou think youâre just gonna keep brushing me off, huh?â he said, voice low and amused.
âYou really love to push buttons, donât you?â You didnât bother hiding the irritation in your voice.
His grin widened, but he didnât press you further. Instead, his gaze softened, almost unreadable. âI donât push buttons. I just call it like I see it.â
You glared at him, biting back a retort. But when he finally stepped aside, giving you space to walk past him, you couldnât help but feel a weird mix of relief and frustration.Â
â
The next time you saw Logan, it was in another session. Group therapy again. Youâd kept your distance as much as possible, staying silent while the others participated. You werenât interested in talking about your feelingsânot to strangers and definitely not to Logan.
As the facilitator guided the group through an exercise, you sat stiffly, arms seemingly permanent crossed. You tried to block out everything and everyone, focusing on the wall in front of you.Â
You were here, just like your parents had wanted. That should be enough.Â
Logan had been observing you quietly, and when the session ended, he was the first one to walk over.
âYou gonna keep that scowl on your face all day, or are you gonna get over yourself?â His voice was sharp, but there was an edge of concern underneath, like he was watching you closely.
You didnât want to feel anything anymore, didnât want to stay caught up in the mess of emotions or the frustration building inside you. âIâm fine.â
He didnât believe you, and you could see it in his eyes. âYou sure about that?â
Before you could snap back, the door to the group room swung open, and the others filed out. Logan stepped closer, his presence so commanding that you felt the air grow heavier around you.
âWhy donât we step outside for a second?â he suggested, his voice low and steady, like he was trying to coax you into something you didnât want.
You glared up at him. âYouâve gotta be kidding me.â
But something in his eyesâsome unspoken understandingâmade you pause. Against your better judgment, you followed him out into the hallway.
Once the two of you were out of earshot from the others, Logan stopped and turned to face you. The air between you was thick, charged with something you couldnât name.
âYouâre acting like a kid,â he said bluntly, crossing his arms over his chest.
âYeah? Well, maybe Iâm just tired of pretending Iâm fine when Iâm not,â you shot back, your voice sharp and biting. The frustration youâd been holding in for days boiled to the surface, your words barely contained.
Loganâs gaze softened, but there was no judgment in his eyes. He was too used to dealing with people like you. âYeah, I figured. Youâve got a lot of tension in you, huh?â His eyes trailed the length of your body.Â
You didnât respond, the anger started to bubble up again, your hands clenched at your side but something about his steady presence seemed to disarm you. Maybe it was the way he didnât back off, didnât try to force anything.
He only took a step closer, and for the first time, you didnât flinch. His hand moved to your shoulder, the touch firm but gentle.
âIâm not here to push you, [Y/N],â he said, his voice low. âBut you gotta knowâholding all that in? Itâs gonna eat you up.â
You sucked in a breath, trying to control the wave of frustration that threatened to overwhelm you. âI donât need advice,â you muttered, feeling vulnerable in a way you hated.
âI donât need advice,â you repeated, except the words coming out sharp, and defensive this time. You hated the way your chest felt tight, the vulnerability creeping in from where Loganâs hand rested on your shoulder.Â
The warmth from his touch spread across your skin, and for a moment, it felt like it was sinking into your bones, grounding you in a way that made your stomach twist. You didnât need anyone grounding you. You didnât need him to make you feel this way.
Loganâs eyes softened just a fraction, but his expression remained steady, like he was waiting for you to crack. âYou sure about that?â he asked again quietly, his tone almost too calm.
You felt it then, the tension pooling inside you, the anger at yourself for even considering his words. You were independent. You didnât need anyone to fix you. You hadnât needed anyone before to figure things out. And you especially, didnât need some wannabe shrink to start telling you how to manage your life.
Without thinking, you grabbed his hand and removed it from your shoulder. You did it quickly, as if his touch burned you, trying to ignore the way his heat lingered on your skin. You told yourself it was about reclaiming your space, but deep down, you couldnât deny the way you resented the way his warmth had made you feelâlike you werenât enough on your own, like you needed him, and it made you bitter.
You didnât meet his eyes as you moved away. The weight of his gaze felt like too much, like he could see right through you. âIâm fine,â you muttered for what seemed like the umpteenth time, turning away before he could say anything more, before you could let him see how much you were feeling.
Each step you took away from him was deliberate, quick. You werenât going to let him break you down, werenât going to let him see how much you wanted the relief he might even be able to offer. You didnât need him. Youâd never needed anyone, not like that.
The hallway stretched out in front of you, a quiet reminder that you could handle thisâyou could handle this.
â
The next few days passed in a haze. Every session, every group exercise felt like you were just going through the motions, barely containing the storm brewing inside you. You could still feel Loganâs hand on your shoulder, the way it had made you feel both furious and small, and it gnawed at you. You told yourself you were fine, but the anger lingered, thick like smoke in your lungs.
You were sitting in the group room again, the usual chatter around you fading into white noise. Your focus was elsewhereâjust trying to survive the hour without having to say a word. You were about to tune out completely when you heard it.
âSheâs just another fucking drama queen.â
The voice came from across the room, a low murmur between two of the other patients. You didnât need to hear more. You already knew they were talking about you. The words were sharp, cutting through the air with a venom that dug deep into you.
You snapped your gaze in their direction, fury immediately surging through you. The mocking tone, the casual dismissalâit was too familiar, too reminiscent of the shit youâd put up with at your last job. You could feel the rage flooding your chest, hot and suffocating. It was a sensation you knew too well, one that had always pushed you to the edge before.
And now, it was back.
The room started to shrink around you. The noise of their laughter, the snickers, the sideways glancesâall of it evaporated as your anger took over. Your fists clenched so tightly your nails dug into your palms.
You didnât care anymore. You needed to make it stop. You needed to hit something. You tried grounding yourself, but it was too late. Your body had already taken over. Your legs were pushing you forward, jumping over your seat in a split-second decision. You saw red, your entire body screaming for release, for someone to just stop dismissing you. But before you could close the distance, a firm hand shot out, grabbing you mid-air.
âHey!â Loganâs voice cut through the chaos in your mindâor in the room, it was hard to tellâhis voice sharp and commanding.
You felt his strong arms wrap around your waistâhard, like steel, pulling you back. You let out a shout of frustration, trying to twist free, but Loganâs grip didnât falter. It was like he was two steps ahead, as if he had already anticipated your move, as if he knew exactly what was about to happen. His voice was in your ear now, low and unwavering.
â[Y/N], enough,â he said, his tone hard but not cruel. âThis isnât the way.â
Before you could even process what was happening, Logan yanked you backwards with a force that left you no room to fight it. In an instant, heâd pulled you out of the room, dragging you down the hallway with such speed that no one could have comprehended what just happened. There was a stunned silence behind you as you were pulled out of the room, your feet barely touching the ground as Logan kept a firm hold, his steps echoing through the hallway.
âLet me go!â You tried to struggle, to twist your way free, but his grip tightened, holding you firmly as he pushed you further from the group.
âNo,â he said, his voice a low growl. âNot until you calm down.â
You were breathing hard, the adrenaline coursing through you. Your pulse was a drum in your ears, and you could feel the heat of your anger radiating off you in waves.
âI donât need you to babysit me,â you spat, still trying to break free. âI donât need your fucking help!â
You tried to tear his arm away, but Loganâs grip tightened, his body pressing into yours as he moved with precision, dragging you down the hallway without a word. The moment you realized what was happening, the reality of it hit you like a punch to the gut. Your anger, your rageâit all crashed down as you found yourself being physically restrained, the helplessness burning in your chest.
He didnât say a word as he pulled you down another hall, his face impassive, but you could feel the tension in his body as if he was just as ready to snap as you had been moments ago. But he wasnât letting you. He wasnât letting you lose control.
âLet me go!â you snarled, struggling against his grip, but again, Logan didnât even flinch. He kept moving, keeping you contained, his presence too overwhelming for you to break free from.
When he finally stopped, it was in a hallway, somewhere far enough from anybody that no one would hear youâno one would witness how youâd almost cracked. He barely released his hold on you, but not before pushing you back against the wall, his body still towering over you, blocking your every escape route.
âTake a breath,â he said, his voice low and steady, like he was speaking to someone who might break apart at any second.
His grip on your arm softened, but only just enough for you to feel the tension in his hand. He wasnât letting go, but he was giving you space to breathe, to calm down if you could.
âYouâre better than this. So stop acting like a fucking fool, [Y/N].â He said, his voice lower now, almost like a warning.
Your chest was still heaving, your body still tense with frustration, but hearing him say thatâhearing him treat you like more than just a hothead, like you were capable of something betterâsuddenly made it all feel worse. The tears youâd been holding back started to burn at the back of your eyes, and you hated yourself for it. Hated that you felt so weak, so fucking out of control.
But Logan wasnât looking at you like you were broken. He wasnât judging you, even though you knew you deserved it. He was just⊠there. Silent. Waiting.
You wrenched yourself out of his grip (despite both your dismay) and took a deep, shuddering breath, trying to regain some composure.
âJust⊠donât touch me,â you muttered, your voice raw and unsteady.
Logan said nothing. He didnât have to. The silence between you was thick with something unspoken, something neither of you could easily put into words.
But it didnât matter. You couldnât let it matter. Not now.
You turned and walked away, not looking back.Â
You barely took a few steps before the frustration began to bubble up again. You had only just started to walk away from Logan, but the moment you stepped around the corner and out of sight, it felt like the world was pressing in on you again.
The laughter from the group still rang in your ears. âDrama queen.â The words clawed at your skin, digging into you like a constant reminder of everything you hatedâbeing dismissed, being belittled.
You were done. You couldnât keep holding it in. Your fists clenched, nails digging into your palms as you spun on your heel, slamming your hand against the wall. The sharp sound of your palm against the cold surface echoed in the hallway, but it wasnât enough. The rage, the helplessnessâit was all too much.
âFuck!â you hissed, breath coming in sharp bursts as you stared at the spot where your hand had just struck the wall, feeling the dull sting radiating through your knuckles.Â
You couldnât keep it together anymore. It was too much. You were tired of being on the edge, of trying so damn hard to be perfect at everythingâat work, at life, at keeping it all together. Everyone depended on you to do everything. Always being there, and put together.
But right now? You didnât want to be. You didnât want to hold it in anymore. Your body was shaking with the weight of it allâthe frustration of being forced to be something that was overwhelming, the anger at yourself for letting it all pile up until you exploded.
You wanted to break. You wanted to let goâbut you knew you couldnât. You couldnât afford to. Youâd kept it locked away for so long, keeping everything in check, trying to make sure no one saw the truth behind the mask. Who knew what would happen if you let yourself slip away, even just a smidge. You were already forced to be somewhere you didnât want to be, you couldnât risk losing anything else. But the anger⊠the helplessness⊠It was too much. You were suffocating, and you couldnât breathe anymore.
And thatâs when it hit you: This is why you were here.
You couldnât handle it. You couldnât keep pretending that you had it all together. You were falling apart at the seams, and the pressureâthe pressure of trying to control everythingâwas finally breaking you.
You spun around, not knowing what you were doing, just feeling the surge of emotions all crashing in. You needed to hit something again, harder. You needed to feel something, anything, that would make it stop. But before you could even move an inch, a voice cut through the chaotic storm inside your mind.
â[Y/N]?â
It was Logan.
You didnât even turn to look at him. You didnât want him to see you like this. Hell, you didnât even want to see yourself like this.
âLeave me the fuck alone,â you snarled, voice hoarse as the tears welled up, but you fought them back. Not yet. Not here. Not now.
But Logan was already there. In an instant, his hands were on you, trying to turn you, pulling you against him, his arms firm and unyielding. You tried to twist, to pull away, but his grip was too strong. And it wasnât that you didnât want to breakâbecause you did.
But you couldnât let him see it. You couldnât let anyone see how much you were falling apart. You were so fucking tired of pretending to be fine, you were ready to break but not in front of him.
âHey, hey, hey,â Logan tried to pacify your struggles, as his hold on you failed to waver. It wasnât like before. It wasnât about controlling you. His presence was heavyâcomforting in a way you hadnât let yourself experience in so long.
The tears came the more you struggled in his grip, despite all your efforts. Hot and fast, they burned your face, dripping onto the linoleum floor, and there was nothing you could do to stop them. You wanted to stop them. You hated it. You hated feeling this weak.
But Logan just held you as your body went slack. His grip tightened, pulling you into him. Not to silence you, not to force you to do anything, but to hold you steady, to keep you from falling completely apart.
âI told you not to touch me,â you choked out through the tears, voice breaking as you finally let yourself give into him, your body shuddering against his. You were shakingânot just with the anger anymore, but with the helplessness that had been buried so deep.
You tried once more to push him away, weakly, but it was like fighting against a wall. His chest was too solid. His presence was too overwhelming. You didnât want to feel it. You didnât want him to see the cracks.
But there was no escaping it now. The reality of everything youâd been holding inside came rushing at you, and it hurt. It hurt more than you could even process.
Logan didnât speak. He didnât try to fix anything. He just let you break in silence. His arms around you were steady, not demanding. They didnât try to pull you back from the edge. They simply were. And for the first time in what felt like forever, you let yourself breathe as you were.
When he finally loosened his grip and you finally pulled yourself away from him, still sniffling, you couldnât bring yourself to look him in the eyes. You couldnât look at him like this.
âPlease, donât touch me anymore,â you muttered, voice shaky, and with that, you turned away, your feet dragging as you walked down the hall. You didnât look back. Not once.
But you knew, in that moment, something had shifted between you. Something in you had cracked.
And Logan knew it too. He didnât stop you this time. He didnât chase you. He just let you go.
The silence in the hallway hung heavy in the air after you walked away. Logan stood there for a long moment, the weight of the last few minutes settling over him. He hadnât expected the tears, the rawness that tore through you, but the way youâd fought it allâfought himâmade something click in his mind.
He didnât follow you. He didnât try to force anything. Instead, he gave you space. Because deep down, he understood.
He didnât move from where he stood immediately. He wanted to give you time. You needed it. Needed to process it all.
When he finally did move, it was slow. The hallway was too quiet now, too empty. His hand rested on the wall, his mind replaying the moments that had just passed, trying to piece everything together. What did you need? He hadnât known before, but now? Now, something was different.
â
It had been a few days since youâd broken down in the hallway. Logan hadnât pushed you since, letting you process things on your own, but he hadnât been able to stop thinking about it. About you. About the way youâd finally let your guard down, even if just for a moment, before retreating again. Heâd stayed close but careful, offering support in quiet ways, waiting for you to let him in.
You walked into your room, your steps slow, your mind racing. As you sat on the edge of your bed, you couldnât stop the image of Logan holding you from replaying over and over in your head. The warmth of his embrace still lingered on your skin, even though you had pushed him away.
A soft knock at your door interrupted your thoughts.
You didnât answer. You couldnât. You knew who it was but, if you looked at him again, you werenât sure you could hold it together. You needed space. You needed time.
Another knock. A little louder this time.
You dragged a shaky breath into your lungs, wiping your face with the back of your hand. You hated thisâhated the fragility of it all. But the pressure inside you hadnât subsided. You could feel the ache in your chest, the pull to break again.
â[Y/N]?â Loganâs voice came through the door, low, steady. âCan I come in?â
You stayed quiet. You wanted to tell him to leave you alone. You wanted to shut him out. But you couldnât. You knew deep down you didnât want him to go away. Not now. Not after everything.
The door creaked open slowly, and Logan stepped inside, his eyes cautious. He didnât push, didnât say anything. His presence was still heavy, but it wasnât demanding. The door shut behind him with a soft thud, followed by a small discernible click.Â
He didnât ask if you were okay. He didnât offer any words of comfort. He just watched you, letting the silence hang between you. You felt the familiar heat rising in your chest, the uncomfortable feeling of being seen too clearly, but this time, it wasnât like before. He wasnât trying to fix you.
You could feel the distance between you. He was there, but he wasnât pushing.
He shifted, taking a step closer, but not too close. It was a subtle offer, a quiet invitation.
The silence stretched between you like a taut string, every breath you took loud in the otherwise still room. Logan didnât rush you. He just stood there, his hands loose at his sides, his presence calm, steady, like an anchor in the storm of your thoughts.
âI thought I told you to leave,â you said, your voice wavering despite the steel you tried to inject into it.
His lips twitched, a barely-there smirk that didnât quite reach his eyes. âYou didnât say a word, sunshine. Just figured you might need someone whoâll stick aroundâHelp take care of you.â
You hated how much his words hit the mark, hated how the rawness inside you stirred at the idea that maybe, just maybe, he was right.
Logan took another step closer, his boots soft against the floor. The click of the lock earlier seemed louder now, echoing in your mind.
âYouâre my nurse,â you whispered, like a warning, but your words lacked conviction.
âI am,â he agreed, his voice low but even. âAnd that means takinâ care of you, even if you fight me on it. Especially if you fight me on it.â The tone in his voice emphasizing the last partâas if the fight you put up brings a rush to his blood.Â
You scoffed, your instinct to push him away rearing its head. âThis feels like more than taking care of a patient.â
His gaze softened, but it didnât waver. âMaybe. But does it matter? Youâre not by yourself anymoreânot in here. You donât have to keep pretending youâre fine when youâre not. Let me help you.â
Your breath hitched, the weight of his words sinking in. He saw too much, and yet, you didnât feel the urge to run. You felt⊠understood. The wall youâd built around yourself since arriving finally cracked, just enough for his steady gaze to slip through.
âYou donât get it,â you muttered, shaking your head, your hands clenching the edge of the bed. âIâve always had to hold it together. Always. If I let goââ Your voice broke, a sharp crack in the stillness.
âYou wonât fall apart,â Logan interrupted, his tone firm but not harsh. He crouched down in front of you, his hands resting on his knees, his body just close enough to block out everything else. âYouâve been doinâ this on your own for too long. Let someone else shoulder some of it.â
His hand lifted slowly, giving you time to pull away, but you didnât. His fingers brushed against yours where they gripped the edge of the mattress, the warmth of his touch grounding you.
âLoganâŠâ Your voice trembled, a mix of warning and plea.
âIâm here,â he murmured. âJust let me help.â
You closed your eyes, trying to pull yourself together, but the heat radiating from him was impossible to ignore. The way his thumb traced over your knuckles was gentle, but there was an unspoken promise in his touch.
He shifted closer, his legs brushing against yours now. The tension in the air thickened, your pulse quickening as his steady gaze roamed your face. There was something in his expressionâsomething deeper than concern. His job might have brought him here, but the way he looked at you was anything but professional.
âLogan,â you said again, this time softer, your voice barely a whisper.
He leaned in slightly, the rough edge of his voice brushing against your skin. âLet me in, sunshine. Just this once.â
Your walls wavered, the vulnerability threatening to spill over. The ache in your chest was unbearable, the pull to let go stronger than your fear. He wasnât just offering to help; he was offering himself.
Your breathing grew shallow as his hand slid up, his fingers curling lightly around your wrist, pulling your hand away from the bed and into his. You opened your eyes as you let him guide you, avoiding all chances to truly look him in the eyes, his movements slow, and deliberate, until your hand rested against his chest.
He shifted and his other hand found your jaw, his thumb brushing over your cheek in a slow, grounding motion. âLet me take care of you. All youâve gotta do is trust me, sunshine.â
Your lips parted, words caught in your throat as his thumb slid lower, grazing your bottom lip. You froze, your mind racing, but Logan didnât push furtherâhe just waited, his touch firm but patient.
The shift was subtle, but it was thereâthe change in the air between you. He wasnât just offering comfort anymore. He was asking for surrender, for trust in the most intimate way.
And God help you, you were ready to give it to him anything he asked for.Â
The tension between you crackled, thick and electric, but his touch remained steady, grounding. Loganâs thumb brushed the curve of your cheek, slow and deliberate, before tracing the edge of your jaw. His movements werenât hurriedâthere was no rush, no demandâjust an unspoken invitation.
âSee?â he murmured, his voice low and gravelly, like he was coaxing you down from a ledge. âAinât so hard to let someone else take the reins for a bit, is it?â
Your breath hitched as his fingers trailed down, brushing the side of your neck. The warmth of his palm lingered, the weight of his hand firm enough to quiet the chaotic swirl in your mind, but not enough to drown out the muffled sounds of people passing by your door.
âI⊠I donât know how,â you admitted, the words tumbling out before you could stop them.
Logan huffed a soft laugh, the corner of his mouth twitching up. âYeah, you do. Youâre already doing it.â
His fingers shifted, sliding to the back of your neck, and you leaned into the touch before you could stop yourself. He drew you closer, just enough to feel his presence envelop you entirely. Your knees brushed against his thighs where he stood in front of you, and the heat radiating off him was impossible to ignore.
âRelax that jaw of yours,â he said, his tone still light but with a teasing edge. After caressing the nape of your neck his hand comes back to your jaw and squeezes until your lips part. âYouâve been clenching it so tight, itâs a wonder it hasnât locked up yet.â
You blinked at him, caught between embarrassment and curiosity. His eyes, dark and steady, met yours, and for a moment, you swore he could see straight through you.
âCâmere,â he murmured, tugging gently on your wrist until you slid closer towards him.
The shift brought your bodies even nearer, his hands bracketing your thighs now, his thumbs brushing circles over the fabric of your pants. His touch was careful but deliberate, testing your boundaries while coaxing you further out of your shell.
âLet me take the lead,â he said softly, his voice dipping lower, more intimate.
You swallowed hard, feeling the ache in your chest ease as something entirely new unfurled in its place. Trust. Need. A quiet kind of surrender you didnât know you were capable of.
âHow?â you finally gave in and asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
Loganâs lips quirked into a small smirk, but his gaze stayed steady, unwavering. âLike I said⊠starting with that jaw.â
His hand moved, knuckles grazing your chin as his thumb pressed gently against the corner of your mouth. The motion was slow, teasing, giving you plenty of time to pull back. You didnât.
âOpen up for me,â he murmured, his words a low rumble that sent a shiver racing down your spine.
The command was quiet, laced with care, but the underlying edge of authority had your pulse spiking. Your lips parted instinctively, your breath shaky as his thumb slid along the inside of your bottom lip.
âGood girl,â he murmured, the praise slipping out like it belonged there.
The words hit you harder than you wanted to admit, warmth pooling in your chestâand lower.
Logan shifted closer, his other hand steadying your jaw as he studied you, his expression unreadable but intent. âWeâll take it slow,â he said, his thumb retreating as he brought his hand to the hem of his pants. âJust let me guide you.â
Your breathing hitched as your eyes flicked down to his hands, the way his fingers deftly worked the knot of his drawstring pants. The quiet rustle of the fabric filled the space between you, a sound that felt louder than it was.
Loganâs movements were deliberate, unhurried, as though he was waiting for any sign of hesitation from you. When your gaze lifted to meet his, you saw no rush, no impatienceâjust the same steady calm that made it impossible not to trust him.
âKeep your eyes on me,â he murmured, his voice grounding you even as it sent your pulse racing.
You swallowed hard, your jaw relaxing further at his words, at the way his presence seemed to envelop you completely. His hand returned to your chin, tilting your head up slightly, his thumb brushing against your skin.
âAtta girl,â Logan praised softly, his lips curving into a faint smile, as his thumb caressed your skin. âThatâs it. Just breathe for me.â
The tension that had coiled so tightly in your chest loosened a fraction as you exhaled shakily. His fingers traced along your jawline, the touch soothing and deliberate, coaxing you to focus on him and nothing else.
When his drawstrings tangled free, Logan leaned in closer, his free hand bracing against the edge of the bed beside you. His proximity was overwhelming in the best way, his warmth and scent filling your senses.
âThis ainât just about me, sunshine,â he said, his voice low and sure. He takes one hand, and brings it to your neck. His thumb finds the pulse point beneath your jaw and he brings you in closer. âThis is about you learning to let go. To stop holdinâ on so tight it hurts.â
You nodded faintly, swallowing against his palm, your body responding before your mind could catch up. There was no space for second-guessing, no time for overthinkingânot with the way Logan looked at you, like he already knew exactly what you needed.
âGood,â he murmured again, his tone like gravel smoothed by honey. âWeâll go slow, but I need you to trust me.â He nuzzled the side of your head, his breath tickling your skin as he slowly let go of your throat.Â
Loganâs hands moved, sliding down to catch yours. His touch was firm but not forceful, the rough calluses on his palm grounding you as he pulled your hands away from your lap. He brought them up, pressing them flat against his chest.
âFeel that?â he asked, his voice low and steady as your fingers splayed over his warm skin through his shirt. His familiar heartbeat thrummed steadily beneath your touch, grounding you, centering you. âThatâs all you gotta focus on. Just me. Nothing else matters right now.â
You nodded faintly, the tension in your shoulders coming to a still as he kept your hands there for a moment, letting you adjust. Suddenly, a loud slam down the hallway caused you to jump and turn towards the door. He quickly grabbed your chin forcing you to look at him. âWhat did I just say?â He quirked, all you could do was look at him, heat blooming from your neck up.Â
Then, slowly once he made sure you werenât looking away, he began guiding your hands downward.
The motion was deliberate, unhurried, as though every inch was a silent reassurance that you could stop at any time. His hands covered yours, his thumbs brushing the backs of your knuckles as he slid your palms down the planes of his torso, over the firm muscle beneath his shirt, until they rested against his hips.
Logan gave you a beat to take it in, his gaze locked on yours. His breathing was measured, but you could see the faintest flicker of tension in his jaw, the restraint he was holding onto so tightly.
âStill good?â he asked, his voice dropping lower, rougher now.
âYes,â you murmured, barely trusting your voice as heat pooled low in your belly. You unconsciously squirmed, in anticipation, in heat who knew. Â
Logan nodded, his lips twitching into something that wasnât quite a smile but carried the same weight of approval. He waited, giving you one last chance to back out before guiding your thumbs to join his, beneath the elastic of his scrub pants.
âEasy,â he murmured, the word a quiet reminder as he guided your hands to push the fabric down slowly, exposing more of his skin. The sliver of skin burned against your fingers as you ghosted them along his body. His abdomen tensed under your touch, his breathing shifting slightly as he exhaled through his nose.
Logan let the pants hang low on his hips, one hand trailing up to cup your jaw again, tilting your face up to meet his eyes. âWeâll go nice and slow,â he said, his thumb brushing the corner of your mouth again. âNo rush, sunshine. Just follow my lead.â
With that, he took your hands again, guiding them lower until they brushed the waistband of his boxers. His movements were steady, deliberate, as though showing you exactly where he wanted you without rushing you.
âYou feelinâ brave?â he teased softly, the faintest smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth, though his eyes held nothing but warmth and patience.
You nodded again scooching closer to the edge of the bed, and the brink of insanity, your chest tightening with anticipation. His smirk deepened, and he leaned closer, his voice dropping to a whisper.
âThen show me, sweetheart,â he murmured. âLet me see what you can do.â
Logan eased back slightly, just enough to give you room to move, but his hand lingered on yours, a steadying presence as he guided your touch. Your fingers curled into the fabric of his waistband, and with a deep breath, you pushed the material down further, revealing more of him inch by inch.
The air between you grew heavier, the tension palpable as his arousal became impossible to ignore. Loganâs hand left yours, but only for a moment, trailing up to brush a stray strand of hair from your face before cupping the back of your neck.
âYouâre doing so good, sweetheart.â he murmured, his voice warm and rough, sending a shiver down your spine. His thumb traced lazy circles at the base of your skull, grounding you as his other hand rested atop your forearm, giving you control but silently encouraging you to keep going.
You shifted slightly, your hands trembling as they moved to rest on his hips again. Logan watched you closely, his gaze steady but dark with something you couldnât quite name. His chest rose and fell in a slow, measured rhythm, as though he were holding himself back, letting you set the pace.
When your hands brushed the bare skin of his hips, Logan inhaled a shaky breath, a faint sound escaping him that made your pulse spike. He leaned in, his lips ghosting over your temple as he murmured, âDonât overthink it. Just take what you can, sunshine. Iâll guide you through the rest.â
Your fingers curled into his skin as you leaned forward, your breath brushing against his lower abdomen. Loganâs hand slid from your neck to your shoulder, a subtle but firm anchor as he shifted slightly, giving you better access.
âAtta girl,â he praised, his voice barely above a whisper. The words sent a wave of warmth through you, and you felt your hesitation ease, replaced by a quiet resolve to follow his lead.
Loganâs hand moved again, this time to rest over yours as he guided one of them lower. He didnât stop until you were cradling the solid weight of him. Your touch lightly teasing the ache that pulsed beneath your trembling hand. Logan guided your hand to palm the rigid heat beneath his clothes, wrapping your fingers around him. A sharp inhale escaped his lips, and you felt the faintest tremor in his muscles as your touch sent a jolt through him.Â
âSlow,â he reminded you, his voice tight but still soft. âJust like that.âÂ
The tension between you was thick enough to cut with a knife, every shift of his body, every measured breath, drawing you further into the moment. Your fingers trembled as they traced the contours of his arousal, the fabric of his boxers doing little to disguise the heat and weight beneath. Loganâs grip on your shoulder tightened slightly, not in impatience but as a subtle reassurance, his silent way of telling you that you were doing exactly what he wanted.
His hips shifted just barely, an almost involuntary reaction to the way your hand brushed against him. âThatâs it,â he murmured, his voice a low rasp that sent a shiver down your spine. His thumb traced another soothing circle at the base of your neck, the grounding motion a stark contrast to the fire building between you. âYouâve got me, sunshine. Just keep going.â
Emboldened by his words, you pressed a little firmer, your palm smoothing over the outline of him, taking your time to explore every inch. The way he exhaled sharply, the muscles in his abdomen tensing beneath your other hand, made you feel a surge of confidence. You dared to glance up at him, and what you saw made your breath catch. His head was tilted back slightly, his jaw tight, the faintest flush coloring his cheeks. His eyes, though darkened with desire, never left yours, his focus sharp and unwavering.
âYouâre taking your time, huh?â he teased, his smirk returning, though it was tinged with a rawness that made your chest tighten. âNot that Iâm complaining.â
You swallowed hard, your hand faltering for just a moment before finding its rhythm again. His reactionâthe way his body leaned into your touch, the low sound he made in the back of his throatâwas intoxicating. It spurred you on, your fingers brushing the waistband of his boxers again before slipping just beneath, your fingertips meeting bare skin.
You felt him twitch ever so slightly, and your cheeks twinged with excitement. There was something happening inside of you that you werenât quite sure what to think of it. You knew what Logan was doing wouldâve been demeaning as hell anywhere else, but here, now⊠all you wanted to do was give in, succumb to whatever it was he wanted you to do. He asked you to trust him, and so far he hasnât shown you a reason not to.Â
Your heart thudded in your chest as the realization hit you: you wanted this. More than anything, you wanted to give yourself over to him, to see what it felt like to let someone else carry the weight for once. If his touchâbarely thereâwas enough to leave you trembling, what else could he make you feel? What more could he show you?
The thought sent a rush of heat through you, your breath quickening as your fingers finally curled around the rigid, throbbing length of him, pressing more firmly against his strained need. Loganâs soft groan rumbled through the air, stirring something deep in your chestâa quiet, unfamiliar hunger that threatened to consume you. You let yourself sink into it, letting the weight of the moment guide your movements, every brush of your touch unraveling a part of you you didnât know existed.Â
âGood,â Logan murmured, his voice warm and gravelly, the rough edge of it sending a shiver down your spine. âJust like that, sunshine. Youâre doinâ perfect.â
You inched closer to the edge of the bed, the pull to be nearer to him overwhelming, almost instinctual. Kneeling now, you practically sank toward the floor, chasing the heat radiating from his body like you couldnât bear the space between you.
Logan shifted, and before you could fully close the distance, he was pulling back. The loss of contact jarred you, a quiet whine of protest nearly escaping before you caught yourself. His hand came to rest on your shoulder, firm but gentle, stopping you in your tracks.
âHere,â he said, his voice low and steady. In one smooth motion, he grabbed a pillow and tossed it to the ground between the two of you, the soft thud breaking the tension for only a split second.
Your gaze snapped up to meet his, eyes wide, blown out with something you couldnât quite nameâbut it was there, raw and undeniable. The way heâd stopped you, how casually heâd thrown the pillow down, like he knew exactly what you needed before you didâyour chest tightened, and your jaw slackened just slightly. You swallowed hard, your mouth suddenly dry, yet you swore you could taste the heat rolling off him.
Loganâs eyes flickered down to your throat as you swallowed, the barest hint of amusement tugging at the corners of his mouth. He let out a low, rough chuckleâone that felt like gravel and smokeâand before you knew it, his hand was cradling the back of your neck, fingers splaying out against your nape and jaw in a way that had you forgetting how to breathe. The strength in his grip was tempered with something careful, deliberate, and when he tugged you forward, you melted into it willingly, chasing the pull like it was magnetic.
His lips found yours in an instant, the kiss deep and consuming, all heat and desperation that made your head spin. Logan kissed you like he was trying to unravel you, his mouth moving against yours in a way that left you pliant and eager, gasping against him. With every subtle pull of his hand, you followed, inching forward without thought, his control and your surrender melting together.
When you opened your eyes again, you were on your knees on the pillow, face to face with the aching strain beneath the thin fabric of his boxers. You blinked up at him, lips kiss-swollen, as the realization coursed through you, heat prickling at the back of your neck. Logan watched you closely, his thumb brushing slowly along your jaw where his hand still lingered, as though grounding you thereâreminding you that this was him, guiding you, coaxing you forward.
âThatâs my girl,â he murmured, his voice dark and edged with something thick and raw. His thumb dragged along your lower lip, smirking when he noticed you shiver. âGo on. Hold me again, sweetheart.â
You didnât need to be told twice. Your hands trembled slightly as they curled around him once more, this time with more confidence, more purpose. Loganâs gaze stayed locked on yours, his chest rising and falling in steady breaths, though his voice dropped to a whisper when he spoke again.
âGood. Now, let me feel those soft lips of yours.â He guided you closer, the weight of his palm on the back of your neck a constant, steadying anchor as you leaned forward. Your lips brushed along the shaft firstâtentative, testingâas though learning every inch of him. Loganâs breath hitched, and when you pressed a lingering kiss to the tip, his reaction shattered any lingering doubt.
A deep groan spilled from his chest, half a breathless chuckle, half a helpless sound that made your stomach twist in the best way. He sucked in a sharp breath through his teeth, the sound shaky as his muscles tensed.
âFuck, sweetheart,â he muttered, his hand tightening at your nape. You swore you felt him tremble for just a moment before his voice turned low and rough again. âSorry, baby. Canât help myself.â
Before you could process what he meant, his fingers slid into your hair, fisting just tight enough to make your scalp tingle, and with a gentle but deliberate motion, he pushed the tip past your parted lips. The first inch of him filled your mouth, the taste of him flooding your senses, and it was enough to make your mind blank entirely.Â
He stilled, his hands firm yet tentative as they guided your gaze up to meet his. The look in his eyes sent a wave of heat coursing through you, pooling low in your belly and making your thighs clench involuntarily. A faint whimper escaped your throat, and you squirmed, trying in vain to adjust the soaked fabric pressing against your folds.
âOh, pretty girl,â Logan murmured, his chest rising and falling heavily, his voice low and rough with restraint. âYouâre makinâ this real hard for me.â He paused, his thumb brushing along your jaw, the smallest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. âYou trust me to take good care of you, right?â
You nodded without hesitation, a small, ragged sound catching in your throat as heat prickled across your cheeks. You felt obsceneâcompletely undone under his gazeâbut the way Logan looked at you chased away every last shred of doubt.
âGood girl,â he breathed, his hands sliding up to cradle the sides of your neck, a gentle yet possessive hold that left your pulse fluttering wildly. Slowly, he guided you closer, his touch steady as he coaxed your mouth open.
âRelax for me, sweetheart,â he whispered, his thumb sweeping over your jaw, encouraging it to drop further. A strained exhale left his lips as he eased in deeper, until the tip of his cock brushed the back of your throat. âOh, yesââ Loganâs voice broke into a rough, shaky breath as he bottomed out, and your eyes fluttered shut as you adjusted to the weight of him.
âCome on, baby. I know you can take it,â he urged softly, his voice laced with both praise and challenge. Your hands rose instinctively to grip his thighs, your fingers twisting into the fabric of his pants as you let out a muffled moan around him.
The sound seemed to undo him further. Logan groaned low in his chest, his hand shifting to the back of your head to hold you there just a moment longer, as though savoring the feeling. You tried to quiet yourself, but the excitement coursing through you was impossible to containâsoft, needy noises escaped despite your efforts, vibrating against him as he held you still against his body.
Loganâs grip tightened at the nape of your neck, his restraint snapping like a taut wire. âThatâs it, sweetheart,â he rasped, his voice rough and gravelly, âfuck, youâre takinâ me so good.â His hips began to moveâslow at first, testing your limitsâbefore he couldnât hold back any longer.
He bucked into your mouth with a sharp, unrelenting rhythm, his breath coming harder and faster with every thrust. The sound of his low, guttural groans mixed with the wet noises of your mouth, the lewdness of it only spurring him on. âSo perfect,â he praised, his voice cracking as he drove himself deeper. âYou were made for this, werenât you, baby? Look at youââ
The words tumbled out in a broken mix of curses and praise, his hold on you steady but possessive as he guided your head to meet each snap of his hips. Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, your throat constricting around him as your nails dug into his thighs, but the way he soundedâso utterly wreckedâsent waves of pleasure through you, making you moan around him.
âFuck,âoh, baby, just like thatââ Loganâs voice was strained, raw, his head tilting back as he sucked in a sharp breath through his teeth. He was on the brink, his movements growing more erratic as he neared his edge, but before he could lose himself completely, his hand fisted in your hair, yanking you back with a sudden, desperate motion.
You gasped, panting heavily as your lips parted, your chest heaving as you blinked up at him. His eyes were blown wide, dark with hunger, his lips slightly parted as though trying to catch his breath. Without a word, Logan hauled you upward, crashing his mouth onto yours in a heated, sloppy kiss. His tongue pushed past your lips, claiming every inch of you as he groaned against your mouth, tasting himself on your tongue.
The kiss was frantic, all teeth and heat as he walked you backward, his hands gripping your waist before spinning you around and throwing you onto the bed. You barely had time to catch your breath before he was on you, his hands tugging at your clothes with a singular focus, stripping you bare with rough, hurried movements.
âGoddamn,â Logan muttered under his breath, his gaze sweeping over your exposed skin as he sat back just long enough to yank his own shirt over his head. The sight of himâbare-chested, muscles taut and flexing as he movedâsent a fresh rush of heat pooling between your thighs.
Loganâs hands were on you in an instant, his lips crashing down against your neck as he kissed, nipped, and licked his way down your body with a ravenous intensity. His fingers dug into your hips, pulling you closer, his grip firm and possessive as though he couldnât get enough of you.
âYouâre somethinâ else, sunshine,â he murmured against your skin, his voice rough and low, vibrating through you. His teeth scraped over your collarbone before his tongue soothed the mark, leaving you gasping beneath him.
His lips trailed lower, his hot breath teasing against your chest as his hands slid up, cupping your breasts with a firm, deliberate squeeze. His thumbs brushed over your nipples, sending jolts of pleasure straight to your core. Logan grinned against your skin when you arched into him, his lips wrapping around one taut peak as his fingers rolled the other, coaxing a breathless moan from your lips.
âLook at you,â he said, pulling back just enough to meet your gaze, his lips glistening. His eyes burned with unrestrained hunger as his hands roamed your body, exploring every inch with rough, greedy caresses. âAlready fallinâ apart for me, huh?â
You barely managed a nod, your head spinning as his mouth moved lower, his lips pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses down your stomach. His hands gripped your thighs, prying them apart as he settled between them, his gaze locked onto yours. The sight aloneâLogan on his knees, his broad shoulders pinning your legs open, his lips glistening as he licked themâmade your breath hitch.
âGoddamn, youâre a dream,â he rasped, his voice thick with reverence and desire. He dipped his head, his stubble brushing against your inner thighs as his tongue flicked out, teasing along your folds. The first swipe of his tongue sent a shudder through you, and Logan groaned deeply, the sound reverberating against you.
âYou taste so fuckinâ sweet,â he murmured, his lips wrapping around your swollen clit and sucking lightly, drawing a sharp cry from you. Your hands flew to his hair, fingers tangling in the thick strands as he worked you over with unrelenting precision.
Logan alternated between long, slow strokes of his tongue and quick, teasing flicks, relishing every sound you made, every twitch of your body beneath him. His hands gripped your thighs tighter, holding you in place as he buried his face deeper, his nose brushing against your sensitive nub as his tongue dove inside you.
âGod,â he growled against you, his voice rough and dripping with approval. âYouâre so fuckinâ sweet, sunshine. Canât get enough of you.â He pulled back slightly, his lips and chin slick with your arousal as he grinned up at you. âLook at you, practically undone for me already.â
You writhed beneath him, your body trembling as he pressed a kiss to your inner thigh, his fingers replacing his mouth to keep the steady rhythm against your clit. âLogan,â you whimpered, your voice high and desperate, your thighs trembling as heat coiled low in your belly.
âThatâs it,â he coaxed, his voice like velvet, his eyes dark and intense as he watched you. âLet go for me, baby. I wanna feel you fall apart.â
You were barely holding onto a thread of sanity, your head spinning, your breath hitching as Loganâs relentless tongue and fingers pushed you higher and higher. Your nails scraped against his scalp, and Logan groaned in response, the vibration sending you tumbling over the edge.
Your body arched off the bed as the pressure inside you built to an unbearable peak, every nerve ending ignited under Logan's expert tongue and fingers. The pleasure crashed through you like a tidal wave, your thighs trembling violently as you cried out his name, your hands fisting in his hair.
"That's it," Logan growled against you, his voice dark and dripping with satisfaction as he continued to devour you. "Let it all out for me, sweetheart."
Your orgasm tore through you, so intense that your vision blurred, your entire body trembling as if it couldnât contain the raw ecstasy coursing through you. Logan didnât let up for a second, his tongue working you through the aftershocks, prolonging every wave until you were left gasping and shuddering beneath him.
Before you could catch your breath, Logan was on you, his body a solid weight over yours. His hands gripped your hips, and in one swift motion, he buried himself inside you, stealing the remnants of your orgasm and turning them into something even more feral.
âFuck,â Logan rasped, his voice rough as his hips snapped forward with an unforgiving pace. âStill so tight, baby. Iâve gotchaâjust let me take care of you.â
The sensation was overwhelmingâhis thick cock filling you completely, his relentless rhythm pushing you further into the mattress with every thrust. Your cries mingled with the sound of skin meeting skin, your nails clawing at his back as he moved with a desperate hunger, biting and sucking at your neck, leaving marks that burned and thrilled in equal measure.
âYou feel that?â he murmured darkly against your ear, his teeth grazing your earlobe before his lips trailed down to your jaw. âThis is what you were made forâbeinâ mine. My perfect little thing, takinâ me so damn well.â
His hand slid up to your throat, his fingers wrapping around it with a possessive grip that sent a shiver through you. He applied just enough pressure to make your head spin, his eyes locked onto yours, burning with raw intensity. âLook at you, sunshine,â he praised, his voice low and gravelly. âSo fuckinâ beautiful when you let goâwhen you give yourself to me.â
Your moans turned into gasps as he choked you lightly, his thumb brushing along the side of your neck, coaxing you to surrender completely. Loganâs lips found yours again, devouring your cries as his hips slammed into you, his movements erratic and desperate as if he couldnât get enough of you.
His teeth sank into your shoulder, a primal growl rumbling through his chest as his hand slid down to your thigh, gripping it tightly to spread you wider for him. His thrusts grew harder, deeper, and the sheer force of him sent you spiraling again, your body clenching tightly around him.
âFuck, baby, thatâs it,â Logan groaned, his voice breaking as he felt your walls flutter around him. âYouâre so fuckinâ perfect, so good for me. Gonna make you mine all over again.â
You cried out as another orgasm overtook you, this one more intense than the first, leaving you trembling and incoherent beneath him. Loganâs movements didnât falter; if anything, they grew rougher, more possessive, his thumb pressing into the base of your throat as his teeth found the tender skin of your collarbone again.
"That's my girl," he growled, his voice sharp with pride and need as your body writhed beneath his. "Look at you, squirtinâ all over meâso fuckinâ perfect.â
Your body gave out beneath him, your vision blurring as the pleasure consumed you entirely. Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes, your cries filling the room as Loganâs relentless pace pushed you to your limits.
Loganâs hand fisted in your hair, tugging your head back as he kissed you deeply, his tongue dominating yours as his hips drove forward with punishing intensity. His free hand roamed your body, squeezing, groping, claiming every inch of you as he chased his own release.
âYouâre mine,â he growled, his voice rough and possessive, his breath hot against your ear as he gave a final, brutal thrust, burying himself to the hilt. His body tensed, a guttural groan tearing from his throat as he came, his hips rolling through his climax as if he couldnât bear to leave your warmth.
Logan collapsed over you, his weight pressing you into the mattress, his lips brushing against your temple as he murmured softly, his voice still tinged with raw need. âSo fuckinâ good, sunshine. My perfect girl.â
Loganâs grip tightened around your waist, his breath ragged as he held you in place, your body still trembling beneath him. His chest heaved, his lips brushing against your ear as he pressed a kiss to the side of your neck, savoring the feel of you around him. His voice was low, a dark satisfaction lacing every word.
âSee how good it feels to let go, sweetheart?â he murmured, his lips curling into a smirk as his eyes bored into yours. "I told you, just had to trust me."
You didnât respond with words, your gaze locking onto his as you fought for breath, overwhelmed by the intensity of the moment. The only sound in the room was your uneven breaths and the faint, rhythmic pulse of his dick still buried deep inside you.
His hand found the back of your neck, pulling you forward with unrelenting force. The kiss he claimed you with was messy and possessive, his tongue dominating yours, tasting, owning you in every way. His grip on your neck tightened slightly, making it harder to breathe, but you didnât care. You were lost in him, completely, mindlessly, heart in your throat as he claimed you like this.
You were on top of him now, your body straddling him, both of you entwined in a messy, raw dance that didnât need wordsâjust the wet slide of your lips, the heat of his skin, the desperate shallow thrusts that made everything blur. His kiss was greedy, ferocious, as though he needed you to know that you were hisâhis plaything, his perfect girl.
You moaned into the kiss, the sensation of him still deep inside you enough to keep your thoughts scattered and incoherent. Logan didnât pull away. He kept you close, his tongue in your mouth, tasting, owning, until you could barely keep your eyes open, your body consumed by him âsloppy, messy, and completely possessive, as if the world could end and all that mattered was this. All that mattered was you, beneath him, in his arms, on top of him, held and claimed by his every touch.
And as you melted into the kiss, body trembling and mind slipping into a daze of pleasure, everything else faded. All that remained was the feel of him, the sound of his breath, and the heat that still burned between you.
---
a/n: smooches! (reblog pls)
#wolverine#hugh jackman#logan howlett#logan x reader#wolverine x reader#deadpool and wolverine#the wolverine#xmen wolverine#wolverine x men#logan wolverine#logan fic#logan fanfic#logan smut#wolverine smut#james logan howlett#smut#wolverine fanfic#wolverine fanfiction#wolverine x you
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Hello!! Can I get Octavinelle 7 fluff?
Always, For You. || Jade Leech
For the Holiday Event! || Prompt: "For you, anything." ; Genre: Fluff
You werenât blind to who Jade Leech was. A man who thrived in chaos, stirred the pot just because he could, and smiled politely while doing it. People avoided asking for his help because, with Jade, everything came at a costâwhether you realized it or not.
Except when it came to you.
The first time it happened, it seemed insignificant. Grim had accidentally knocked over one of Crewelâs more volatile potions, the sparkling liquid oozing across the table, heading straight for your bag. You froze, unsure whether to grab your things or call for help, but before you could move, Jade stepped in.
âCareful,â he murmured, swiping your bag out of harmâs way with his gloved hands. His movements were graceful, calm, as if he were plucking a rare mushroom in one of his favorite forests. You stared at him in shock as he casually placed your bag on a safe countertop, not even glancing at the bubbling mess behind him.
âUh⊠thanks?â you managed, unsure what just happened.
Jade turned to you, that polite, unreadable smile firmly in place. âThink nothing of it.â Then, as he walked away, he added over his shoulder, âFor you, anything.â
You were left blinking, your heart doing an awkward little flip.
The second time was more dramatic. Floyd had you in a headlock, cackling about how you had to play some ridiculous game with him during lunch. You were already half-resigned to your fate when Jade appeared out of nowhere.
âFloyd,â he said smoothly, his tone calm but firm. âLet go.â
âCâmon, Jade, Iâm just having fun!â Floyd whined but loosened his grip anyway.
Jadeâs hand rested on his twinâs shoulder, his smile never faltering. âAnd Iâm sure they appreciate your enthusiasm, but I believe their schedule is rather full today.â
Before you knew it, Floyd had been swept away, leaving you standing there dumbfounded.
âUh⊠thanks again?â you called after Jade.
He paused, glanced back, and gave you that same polite smile, though this time his gaze lingered a moment too long. âAnything for you.â
It wasnât fair, you thought later, as you mulled it over for the hundredth time. Jade didnât help people out of the goodness of his heart. He liked to meddle, to twist situations to his advantage. And yet⊠he kept stepping in for you, expecting nothing in return.
The third time, you couldnât take it anymore. After another ridiculous incidentâthis time involving him steering you away from an overly enthusiastic Ruggie and a âtotally harmlessâ prankâyou confronted him.
âWhy do you keep helping me?â you blurted, cornering him in the Mostro Lounge after his shift.
Jade didnât seem fazed. If anything, he looked amused. âWhy wouldnât I?â
âBecause!â you said, flustered. âYou donât⊠you donât just help people! Thereâs always something in it for you. But with me, you justâŠâ You trailed off, gesturing vaguely as your thoughts tangled.
Jade stepped closer, his mismatched eyes gleaming with something unreadable. âAh, but youâre special.â His voice softened, and you felt your heart stutter as he leaned in, close enough that his words were just for you. âFor you, anything. Always.â
His smile wasnât sharp this timeâit was soft, genuine. And it was so much worse because it left you reeling, your cheeks heating as your chest filled with something you couldnât quite name.
Jade didnât wait for your response, just straightened and walked away, leaving you standing there, your mind spinning.
You werenât sure what youâd done to earn his favor, but one thing was clear: Jade Leech had a way of making you feel like the most important person in the room.
Masterlist
#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x reader#twst#twisted wonderland#jade leech x reader#jade x reader#jade leech#jade#twst jade
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My mom has her TV on in her room almost 24/7 and it's always on some news outlet or other. We talk a lot about politics and world/national/local events. And we do have a lot of varying views on a lot of things but we're both adults who are capable of saying "well we've both stated we have differing opinions and it's clear that we're actually arguing at this point and not just talking so let's put away the topic for now." But there are also other times where I'm just too overwhelmed by my own life to think about what's going on in the bigger world around me, so my mom knows to be hesitant to bring up news stuff with me (i.e. she doesn't just start talking about politics/world events with me rather she'll ask if I'm in the mindset to discuss things when she wants my opinion on something). This is all relevant.
We've always been able to talk about nearly everything from the economy to the school system to human rights to human tragedy and we've never tried to censor ourselves around each other (outside of getting too emotional with our language). But about two weeks ago when the United Healthcare CEO was assassinated, my mom, who is in her 50s, came to me and she said "Did you see that the CEO of United Healthcare got unalived?"
And I just sat there and looked at her completely confused and she was like "did you not hear about it? It's all over the news. It happened in clear view on the street." Like the problem was that I hadn't heard of the event not that my Gen-X mother had just in a real life conversation said the word "unalived".
And I told her as much. "Yes I've heard that. Why did you say 'unalived' instead of 'murdered'?
And she told me that she just thought that since I'm touchy about heavier topics sometimes (which is definitely true, that does occasionally happen) she thought it would be better to just not use the "heavy" words. I asked her if she realized, honestly, how stupid that was because regardless of the word she used, she was still talking about a murder, it didn't change the subject matter, she was only making the subject matter seem less significant and severe by changing the word to baseless internet lingo that a bunch of misguided, clout-chasing influencers spread.
She hadn't. She's doesn't use the Internet replacement words a lot, online or otherwise. This was a first. She thought this was a different situation, and a fine one to use it in, and like the above stories people shared, it's still not.
I'm allowed to say there are days where I want to avoid heavier topics because I'm overwhelmed. I'm allowed to not ever really discuss certain topics because they actually trigger me based on my own experiences. But people who are out here living their whole lives like just talking about about difficult or controversial topics, or asking questions about it, or enjoying media where it's portrayed (especially when it's actually portrayed respectfully) are being ridiculous, and they're handicapping themselves. They're never going to learn how to talk about hard things, or how to handle hard things. And honestly I feel bad for them.
Luckily, in my case, once I explained why my mom saying what she said was incredibly weird and honestly devaluing to the conversation, she backtracked and told me that (like I said above) she doesn't talk like that regularly and she has no intention to start; it's just that this was a huge news event and that day had been particularly rough for me emotionally and she wasn't sure how to approach it. So her intentions were good and I'm very lucky that she understands and also agrees that the Internet censorship language is incredibly unnecessary.
we have GOT to kill tiktok/twitter self-censorship i just witnessed a grown adult say the word âsmexâ out loud to our professor
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Okay I have thoughts on Veilguard and why I liked Rook and the whole positivity thing. Hear me out.
Spoilers:
One of the main topics of Veilguard (it has many imo) is the question of leadership (which is connected to the question of identity too). It's a question that is asked through Solas at the beginning as to why Rook should be given information regarding the gods.
None of the reasons are "because I'm special". None of them are "because I killed an Arishok" nor "killed an archdemon" nor "because I was blessed by whatever god you want". The purpose of Rook is that they're a rando, so far away from what heroes look like in Thedas. The only stuff you can answer to Solas is "I'm good against odds" or "there was nobody else to do it" and a third one I haven't picked yet that's probably as underwhelming.
Rook did one good deed Varric saw and was like "uh unpredictable and defending people, neat". Solas has been dealing with politicians/politics/big names all of his life, they are assertive people, leaders in the sense of leading faceless soldiers to war for a cause. Rook is none of that, they're the antithesis of this actually and that's the whole point of Varric choosing them.
What IS a good leader actually? The purpose of Rook as a character was to grow and make players wonder. If we look at how "Varric" treats them during the game, and the options, it becomes kinda obvious that Rook is meant to be unsure/not feeling like they deserve to be there/not in their right place. I saw many criticisms about the game for that, but it is MEANT to be like that. We see other leaders, through Solas, Elgarn'nan, etc etc... Every time we see what they do, what they think regarding their faction, how they treat their people. The whole game explores what the fuck is a leader.
I think Veilguard wanted us players to wonder, if we got into Veilguard tomorrow recruited by Varric etc, who would we be as a leader? I think anyone, and even people with leadership positions IRL, would feel awkward and unsure once in a setting to fight gods, having the weight of the whole world on their shoulders. We weren't meant to play "any" character like we used to in other DA (and even then I'd argue Hawke is always kinda the same dude too but I digress), we were meant to play Rook: the rando who got there by Varric and who is unsure about leadership because wtf is happening. This is an honest characterization, what would genuinely and obviously happen. We'd feel inadequate and useless. But the game doesn't tell you "ah you're shitty for feeling inadequate and useless because you have none of what makes a great war leader", it tells you "okay, you have nothing giving you an advantage against your enemies... You're average. What's the best you can do with what you have?"
How would you deal with the rest of the story, with all the understandable vulnerabilities and insecurities you have? Rook dealt with it by supporting the people they thought were better/adequate/fit the hero box they didn't. Because they do, all of them have something narratively special about them. Rook supported them so they realized themselves as heroes, so that they didn't die in the final fight. Which... All comes back to the positivity thing. I know I would do my pep talk to my team, because that's probably the only thing I'd think I'd be good at, and I know they would certainly need it considering the weight on our shoulders. It is what I do in my daily life in the face of struggles.
Rook is meant to be that. They're meant to be the supportive leader, because they have an absolutely disastrous view of themselves and, as a character, fit none of the boxes meant for Heroes. But in dealing with the hands they had, they made heroes out of special people. And those heroes saved the world. And Heroes could include Solas depending on your ending imo.
Veilguard tells you that's the kind of leader you can be, even if you don't think you're adequate in your life, even if you have vulnerabilities, even if you're facing enemies who have a tremendous advantage over you. You, as an individual, can support the special people around you so that they realize themselves and become heroes, even if you're average yourself.
NGL I can't wait to be in 2034 when people realize Veilguard is actually a great game.
#dragon age veilguard#spoilers#dragon age veilguard spoilers#veilguard spoilers#dragon age the veilguard#dav spoilers#datv spoilers#dragon age spoilers
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idk why 18 year olds who just took their second class in field are on twitter using their major to explain why theyâre an expert on a topic to then parrot reactionary and false rhetoric but it is always fascinating to see in the wild.
also not to be a snob but massive prestigious universities arenât even making their undergraduate students read full books in the way they used to, theres been a pivot to heavily teaching via excerpts. so idk if your carefully selected excerpts are going to really touch on any breadth in your chosen field. I also donât know how confident you should be in parroting excerpts if you canât reliably tell the difference between good and bad studies.
More on the excerpt thingâincredibly dangerous to not read books your excerpts come from in full. Anyone can organize quotes to make a book say something completely counter to its actual message. If you refuse to engage with the source material enough to understand their methodology maybe you should do so before quoting said excerpt otherwise you are just as uneducated as the people youâre attempting to own onlineâexcept you have the false belief of genuine insight.
This is kind of the perfect storm for how republicans say they want to restructure higher education and we should be more wary of calls to authority like âThis is my MAJORâ and calls to degree worship like âJordan Peterson has a PHD!!!â over proof of decent studies and quality source material. Appeals to authority will always benefit reactionaries.
At the end of the day peopleâs politics will color how they navigate their own field and financial interests will obfuscate the meaning of research. we see this time and time again. The first example I can think of is the IQ by nation research done by actual white supremacists.
Placing students as consumers is a great way to buy your way into a field and use whatever bad science you want to make claims based on the authority of your degree and your position in society.
I will say it again. A call to authority and a call to a degree is not the same as good research or good source material!
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In the past year, especially with the recent elections across Europe and in the US, itâs become blazingly clear that regardless of your political leanings, everyone is fucking fed up to the nines. You can see it in our attitudes towards traditional media and government. Sure, we land on different conclusions about what might get us out of this mess, but the reality isâitâs not in our hands. It probably never has been.
The Luigi Mangione situation has truly blown my head off my shouldersâthe sheer arrogance and disconnect from normal people that traditional media and government officials have shown. Take the Mayor of New York, for instance. Sweet Jesus. Heâs like a character from a shit pantomime. Whether youâre on the left or the right, heâs the villain of the piece. People are done. And letâs be real, itâs only going to get worseâbecause Iâm a positive princess like that.
Trump isnât going to magically make prices drop; heâs literally said as much. I canât fathom a single politician who could genuinely make a difference when the CEOs already hold all the power. Musk and his ilk were invited to the table long ago, and letâs not forget the donorsâpouring huge amounts of money into all political parties. Itâs a silent agreement: their influence comes first, their profits are prioritised, and the rest of us are left to scrape by.
What gets me is how people still talk about âthe richâ like itâs actors and musicians pulling the strings. Sure, theyâre rolling in it, and the entertainment industry has plenty of rot, but compared to the wealth of CEOs? Negligible. The real bastards are the ones we couldnât even name. The ones cutting corners, exploiting workers, and choking the planet with plastic while pocketing the profits.
Meanwhile, the entertainment industry puts on this Truman Show pantomimeâa performance of accountability so we can cheer and boo. Every public takedown, every cancellation, every PR scandalâitâs all theatre designed to make us believe the system works. And while weâre caught up in the spectacle, what the fuck are the people at the top of the means of production doing? Bumping up their profit margins and giving themselves bonuses.
These people live without consequences. And when the internet (rightly or wrongfully) memed the murder of a CEO, they responded with Gotham-level theatrics to reassure their donors that theyâll always protect their own. They even tried to pin terrorism charges on a man whose frustrations most normal people can empathise with.
Why is it that those in power are never arsed about creating a spectacle of a CEO in handcuffs, dragged out for decades of exploitation? Because the system doesnât just protect themâit is them.
At this point, the only thing these people are achieving is making everyone angrier. And the politicians we like? Theyâre the ones who seem to reflect the nonstop screaming going on in our heads. The incompetence, the lack of solutions, the sheer disregard for normal livesâitâs all making tensions worse. And itâs going to blow up in their faces. (Not literallyâcalm down, loves.)
I know I sound like David Icke, okay? But sincerely, Iâm fed up and I would love nothing more than a shred of accountability for billionairesâand for politicians and journalists alike to do their fucking jobs.
Itâs embarrassing.
#luigi mangione#eric adams#us politics#politics#late stage capitalism#eat the rich#classism#capitalism#elon musk#the man who looks like chucky if he was the beneficiary of an apartheid state
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K, I really, really want to make it clear here that I am not talking about America specifically, I am simply using AOC as an example of a well-known young politician.
Lobbying is a phenomenon all over the world, and just because other countries have *different* legislation doesn't mean they have solved their lobbying problem. In fact, the US was the first country in the world to formally regulate lobbying, in 1946. In fact I would like to point out that the US *does* have term limits for the president, unlike the prime Minister of Canada, unlike the prime Minister of the UK, unlike the chancellor of Germany, unlike the prime Minister of Japan, and so on.
What do they do if they never get re-elected? A term limit is not introducing a new problem.
Ummm...no? Obviously not? No one's arguing term limits hurt politicians who don't get re-elected. The argument is that being productive at politics requires working together well with other politicians, understanding the needs of your constituents, and being clever at creating/proposing policy. These are all skills people get better at with practice.
Term limits aren't hurting the politicians who don't get re-elected. They hurt the politicians who are liked enough by their constituents to be re-elected multiple times, who are successful at passing popular legislation, who have connections & relationships with their coworkers (other electeds).
You have not described why penalizing the most experienced & successful politicians is a good thing actually. What problem are you saying term limits would solve?
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Hero, villain god 36
(Prev) (Next) (First)
*Mumbo's pov*
Ever since that weird conversation you had a few days ago you have been looking into who mother spore could be ...You honestly thought it would be...well, not easy per say, but you thought you could at least find something on who mother spore could really be... Anything on her identity.
Perhaps mentions of her prior to when she appeared in your lab? Or another criminal with similiar abilities? A vigilante? An hero? But you found nothing of the sort, you found exactly zero mentions of anyone that could even come close to resembling her in description.
She is quite tall so you restricted the search to that general height but you found nothing, you expanded the search and still nothing. You found cases of people with mushroom or spores or even decay themed abilities but none of them resemble Mother Spore's. Maybe her powers is actually a very hidden type of technology? If so you must be much more ignorant of technology then you thought yourself to be. Maybe a mutation of some kind but if so why is it not recorded anywhere.
You were always a bit suspicious of her considering how she quite literally dropped into your life so suddenly but this... This is truly baffling, It's like she didn't exist and then just appeared one day in your lab...
...
...It's a bit enticing even, she has built this idea that's she's the brawn to your brain...the power to your mind... but she's clearly extremely well versed in covering up her traces or is in contact with someone else who is.
It's fascinating on an intellectual level but it's also terrifying on a personal one.
You were already suspicious of why she would need access to your network when you still didn't know she had managed to scrape off everything about her from the entire internet but now that you do knoe It's doubly as suspect... It seems you'll have to keep her extremely close....You have to know more...no, you need to know more. For your own safety at the very least.
*Cub's pov*
Grian is... Well, you don't particularly trust him yet, trust is not given easily especially by you and he's been in your life for a very short time.. looking at the calendar It's not even been a few weeks since you've met him and you talked like twice in that time.
He looks like a good guy so he has that going on for him, polite, pretty smart too as far as you can see... Scar has really taken a liking to him and now he's even met his sister and her friend group.
...You are happy for him of course, he deserves to have people outside of you to turn to, but it's hard to ignore how risky of a situation it is. It's not just Grian anymore, It's a group of strangers neither you or Scar know anything about...and even if they really are as good people as it seems they are from a glance there's always going to be the risk of Scar revealing to them too much and blowing both of their covers. It's anxiety inducing more then anything...
Still you decide to tolerate Grian for now, Scar might be oblivious at times but he's a good judge of character most of the time, so if he likes the new guy that much you'll give him a shot.
...
Then comes the medical examination, Scar thought it would be ideal for you to do one to Grian as well since you already do his pretty regularly. You can see the merit in that and agree easily, it would be easier to do both instead of letting the association do Grian's and then having to deal with them more then you already have to.
Which is what brought you here...with a machine breaking the moment you tried to analyze Grian's blood and multiple dna tests result coming out empty.
That is... definitely not normal. You have heard of powers changing the structure of dna before but never to this extent. It's not unheard of maybe but still, weird enough to keep on your mind, there might be more to Grian's power then it seems and knowing what could be helpful in the long run. You really hope there isn't something nefarious going on because you don't want to think of how Scar would react if there was.
"Scar?"
"Uh? Yes?"
"There were some complications with the tests"
"Oh no! Is anything broken??"
"Nothing important don't worry...just, bring Grian back for another visit soon. It's important."
"Alright!"
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đČđŸđđđđ¶đ đđ đđ¶đŸđ đđ¶đ.
Dallas Winston x Inexperienced!Fem!Reader
Word Count -> 3K
cw -> BEST FRIENDS TO LOVERS TROPE, lots of cursing from dally >:(, movie Dally (not book Dally), kinda ooc but eh, mentions of wet dreams (for plot mwahaha), dirty talk from Dal, eepy reader, side fucking, ooo he falls asleep with his dick inside, lazy ending :C
Donâtcha just love him? I do :DDD It's so lazily done, I'm so sorry but pls do enjoy!
The hollering was loud as you rushed out of your home with just a backpack of belongings.
You hadnât expected a fight to go this far. Yes, your parents werenât the nicest, but kicked out until you âmature upâ? You had never experienced this, nor were you ready to take a walk of shame over to Dallyâs place for the evening.
You and Dally were practically siblings with how well you two knew each other. Bonded at the hips since you were both little, and it never changed. You had grown accustomed to his way of expressing friendship, through playful attacks and sharing of belongings.Â
Dally may have been a bit tough when expressing his affections towards the people he cared for, but he still cared regardless. He believed tough love was the way to go.
The walk was pitiful, your feet were almost scraping the ground out of genuine disbelief. Thank God it was sunset, you still had some sunlight left to get you to Buckâs place so you could find Dally. Maybe he wouldnât mind you staying over, a hangout, as he called it.
In just a throw sweatshirt and joggers, you hustled along the sidewalks to get to your destination a bit faster. The cool evening breeze wasnât pleasant, but it kept you awake and kept you pacing.
The light of Buckâs building had finally come into view after you had walked a few more blocks, and the loud boisterous music hit your ears not long after the lights hit your eyes. You were relieved you had made it before the sun had fully gone down, heaven forbid men would know how to keep anything in their pants.
Scampering up to the front door took enough courage out of you, a lady like you in a wretched neighbourhood like this wasnât fitting at all. But you were desperate, you were in need and Dally was your only go-to. Well, you couldâve gone to the Curtisâ household, but it was a bit more uncomfortable there because you knew less people.
Knocking with cold and clammy hands against the old door, you hesitantly awaited the arrival of Buck or someone else who heard your knock. Luckily the wait wasnât long, after a few mere seconds the door was opened. A drunk man, not at all Buck, gave you the snarkiest expression youâve ever witnessed and let you in. Graciously, you hurried inside.
The bustling people bothered you, especially so when you could see two people literally doing it on a pool table. Disgusting, you thought as you rushed through the swarms of chattering and dancing folk to the stairs that led to Dallyâs apartment.
Shoes clomping against the wooden floorboards of the stairs, you found yourself questioning what his apartment room was. Was it the one on the left? No, it was the one on the right. Right? You flipped through your memories like files, and confirmed that it was on the left. Silly you. But you were still polite, knocking on the door quietly.
The door had swung open, and you were met with a waft of cheap tobacco and a wet Dally. Oh, heâd just gotten out of the shower. What a surprise, you thought he never showered.
âThe fuck are you doinâ here? Why didnât you call me? Itâs fuckinâ dark outside, you dipshit.â He berated you even if it had no meaning, ushering you into his apartment and closing the door behind him.
His body glistened with water droplets that were scattered all along his shoulders and back, even his chest as the droplets were caught by the towel seated at his hips. Jesus, a sculpted body too. Wait, why the hell were you staring? That was too inappropriate! You mentally chastised yourself while kicking off your shoes and throwing your bag to the unswept floor.
The weight of the fact that your parents had actually kicked you out started to sink in, and the way your shoulders sank wasnât really that hard to spot when Dally looked at you. Something was wrong if you had brought a bag and a saddened expression over to his place.
âThe fuck happened? You good, or is somethinâ bugginâ ya?â He asked you, gesturing vaguely for you to sit on his aged mattress. You listened, of course you would, and sat consciously on his bed. He really didnât mind changing in front of you, he just made sure his back was facing you so you didnât see... the parts where the sun doesnât shine.Â
âParents kicked me out, didnât wanna go to Johnnyâs or Darryâs...â You mumbled under your breath, holding in your breath as you looked at the floor to give him some privacy. After all, he was kind enough to let you into his place.
Dally gave a hum of acknowledgement, which may have been seen as rude, but it was really just him thinking. Going over to Johnnyâs place didnât make sense considering the fact that his parents were a bit too bitchy and cruel around people, and Darry wasnât exactly fond of people sleeping over at his house. Sure, people staying for a while was more than welcome, but everyone knew that Darry was strict about sleepovers.Â
âYouâre such an idiot. What did you even do to get kicked out? Your parents are the chillest compared to all of ours.â Dally huffed, pulling on his joggers and drying his dark chocolate hair lazily with his towel.
âDunno, they just said I had to leave until I âmature upâ or somethinâ.â You grumbled a bit angrily, not directed at him obviously, you were just confused and frustrated at your parents.
Dally nodded, putting out his cigarette on the ashtray and plopping his body beside you, smiling a bit as if to reassure you.
âAh, whatever. You donât need your parents when you got me, yeah? Now, what clothes did you bring? I doubt sleeping in tights is gonna be comfy.. especially considering how much you roll around.â He teased, knowing you needed at least a bit of humour to boost your mood.
And it worked. You smiled a bit, lightly punching his chest out of playful irritation from his comment. But you really couldnât deny it, you could be a very active sleeper when you were stressed or angry. Frustration and sleep just didnât mix for you.
âI brought some pajamas just in case, should I change now? Itâs only 8.â You chuckled as he winced dramatically at your punch. Pfft, like you actually did him damage.
âWell, Iâm tired now. So either you change and we can take a nap, or you can deal with me complaining about not sleeping until you decide to sleep.â Dally huffed, looking at you with a sleepy expression.
The words he spoke were about the only serene thing youâd heard all evening. No yelling, no obnoxious cars, just faint party music and Dallyâs dulcet yet gruff voice. It was odd how comforting something as silly as that could be.
âUgh, fine, youâre no fun.â You stuck your tongue out at him, earning you a playful slap to your arm as you hurried off of his bed to get your bag.
The bag sat limply against the wall near the door of his apartment, and you opened it swiftly to find your pajamas, but quite literally let your facial expression drop to utter disbelief. No, you surely hadnât forgotten something as important as your night shirt! You scavenged disdainfully through the mess of stuffed clothes and beauty supplies in your bag in hopes of finding the shirt you thought youâd packed, but ended up looking at Dally with a sorrowful expression.
Dally looked at you with eyes displaying annoyed confusion, but seeing that little mopey frown on your face told him all he needed to know. You either forgot something, or remembered something important.
âWhat is it?â He questioned instinctively, looking at you through half lidded eyes as he propped himself up with one arm.
âI forgot a night shirt.. you think I could borrow one for tânight? Promise Iâll give it back.â You muttered, a bit embarrassed by your carelessness and forgetfulness. But nonetheless Dally chuckled a bit and nodded.
âFuckinâ idiot. Yeah, the closet should have a few shirts. Donât touch my leather.â He huffed, flopping onto his back and letting himself soak up some much needed rest.
You nodded and headed over to the closet, feet softly hitting the floor as you found his small closet. Already ajar thanks to his laziness, you searched through the hung clothes and stumbled upon a relatively clean looking shirt. A white one, not a stain on it either.
Taking your only pair of night shorts and the shirt you gratefully borrowed from Dally into his bathroom to change, you found yourself eyeing the soft fabric with gentle intent. Dally was kind enough to let you borrow something of his...
You pushed that thought down, instead focusing on getting out of the uncomfortable clothes you wore to look decent on the sidewalks. Taking off your pants to replace them with your night shorts, and taking off your top and bra to cover up with Dallyâs shirt. It smelled like him, and it smelled strangely nice.
You took your leftover clothes out with you, chucking them mindlessly near your bag somewhere on the floor near the bed before plopping down dramatically beside him. The weight of you on the bed made it sink, and Dally was a bit startled out of his sleep when you did so.
Dally looked at you with a stink expression, but it was all playful.
âGood, now hush so I can sleep.â He muttered, throwing the blanket over the top of you two and sighing contentedly.
You just smiled and nodded, lying comfortably on your back to sleep just because you felt a little stiff in his mattress. But it was comfortable in all honesty, being warm and close to someone so close to you.
You were slowly jostled out of your sleep by a hand shaking at your shoulder. While you didnât really want to move from out of your spot since you were oh so comfy under the warm sheets, the vigour in the shaking of your shoulder didnât cease.
So begrudgingly, you gave a hum of acknowledgement to show that you were at least somewhat awake, and Dallyâs voice was all you heard for a moment.
âSweetheart, please... had a dream âbout you. Got me fuckinâ hard as shit. Iâm askinâ nice.â Dally murmured, voice gruff and scratchy from the lack of use as he slept. You were almost awake, the mention of him having a dream about you didnât spur much of a reaction from you.
âMmh.. âm tired, Dal. Go to bed.â You huffed, rolling from your back to your side, back facing his front as you smushed your cheek into the pillow.Â
But your words didnât really help him, nor did it encourage him to stop. In a way, you turning to your side was meant to tease him. To egg him forward and see what heâd do. Dally wasnât stupid, he knew you well enough to know a trick or two of yours would always come after a chastise.
So Dallyâs hand came to softly hold your waist, caressing the skin as the shirt you borrowed from him rode up a little. Goddamn, those little bottoms you wore showing just the tiniest bit of your asscheek, the flesh threatening to drive him mad. How could you look so precious without even trying?
âOh sweetheart.. youâre so perfect, so pretty. God, lemme take âem offa ya. Please? Iâm askinâ nice.â Dally almost begged you, almost pleaded. While you didnât expect him to ask so kindly, he was just doing it so you didnât make him repeat himself. He was a smart man, thinking ahead the way he did.Â
So you nodded, still happily sprawled on the mattress without a care in the world. And your nod was all it took for Dallyâs hands to scoop under the elastic waistband of your sleepwear, and yank it down to your knees while pulling your underwear with it. The sudden coolness of his frigid fingers had you waking up a bit more, giving you some alertness as his hands freely squished the globes of your rear.
âNever knew under all the clothes, youâd look so pretty. Fuckinâ shit, youâre doinâ things to me that I donât like.â A lie. Dally was happy diving into the feelings of admiration and want, the lustful desire to have your body, but also the soft blooming of love and adoration that even led him to this point.
âMmh.. like what you see, Dal?â You questioned him teasingly, giggling sleepily.
âThatâs a stupid question. âCourse I do, now scoot closer. Too goddamn far away from me to do shit.â He grumbled a bit, moving his hand from your asscheek to slip between your legs and right next to your aching core.
You werenât necessarily wet, you were tired and obviously werenât in the right mood for this, but Dally was determined to make you feel good somehow. So his fingers gently spread your labia, and his index finger started twirling excitedly around the soft bud of your clit.
A soft sigh of contentment escaped you as his hand worked its magic on you. Now, you knew very well that Dally was an adventurous guy. Lots of his nights were spent with flings, or at the bars touching on the ladies that threw themselves onto him. Of course he would have experience, much more than you anyway. But how would he even feel if you told him youâd never done it? Would he reconsider?
But Dally was gentle with you, smoothing over your clit in repetitive circles as if trying to dizzy your clit. And it worked, really. Your hips, probably tired and sore, were meeting the soft ruts of his hand, enjoying how soft and sensual his movements were.
He was treating you like porcelain.Â
âFeelinâ alright, sweetheart? Got my fingers soaked, think sheâs gonna let me in yet?â He murmured exasperatedly into your ear, the warm air making your skin tingle with delight.
You smiled, eyes lazily fluttering open as you turned your head over to look at him a bit. How cute, pink cheeks and puffy lips paired with desperate eyes and furrowed brows. How could someone look so cute when they were so focused?
You giggled a bit when he called your pussy a she, but you nodded slowly.
âBut Dal.. this is my first time. Yâsure you wanna take it?â You asked so softly, so serenely as you laid wrapped in his arms.
So soft, so gorgeous. Dally never felt such a tender feeling before.
Without any hesitation, Dally nodded his head vigorously and smiled a bit. The sweet crinkles of his eyes make you smile too.
âAlright then, just be careful, yeah? I trust you..â You mumbled, letting him take his hand away from in between your legs.
He moved his arm to wrap around you, lazily inserting his fingers into your mouth as if silently telling you to clean the mess you made while his other hand arranged his cock with your pretty pussy. He was just mere millimeters away from claiming you as his, forever staining your pussy as used.
But when you gently bumped your hips to his, like a silent way of urging him to continue, he did so. His tip was slowly guided to your perfect cunt, the warmth of its inviting juices nearly having him in a chokehold. And in one small rut, the tip of his hot and heavy cock was plunged into your precious cunt, innocence stripped from it as you made the softest croon around his fingers.
It wasnât long until Dally started to rut his hips against yours, flesh clashing against flesh to make the unholiest clapping sounds. Thank the heavens he thought to put his fingers in your mouth, an inexperienced and lovely thing like you was sure to make a bit too much noise.
But Dally was gentle as he banged out the first round with you.
Muffled moans and groans from the both of you filled the small apartment, and the scent of sex was pungent as your hand found Dallyâs forearm. Nails digging into the soft flesh as the nerves in between your legs started to burn, a hot and searing sizzle that had your already tired brain going bonkers.
âDal- Dal..â You muttered, muffled cries of his name being silenced by the fingers plugging your mouth. How were you supposed to tell him it felt weird?Â
Maybe it was just overstimulation, but your legs were shaky, your abdomen felt tight, and your head was growing fuzzy. Not at all in an unpleasurable way, you were having the time of your life. But, it was a little discomforting from how overwhelming it was considering how you had just had your first proper climax given to you.
But Dally didnât stop, no. He was too far gone in the flutters of your cunnyâs walls, too engulfed in the pleasure of hearing your sounds and feeling your body pressed right up against his. You were so precious, so perfect. How could he not just let himself mould into you?
And sure enough, the overstimulation left your poor cunt reaching another peak, legs beginning to twitch as you simmered down. Thankfully, Dally seemed to be done too, as he ceased his movements and just held you tight.
You bathed in the afterglow of such an intimate moment, letting Dallyâs body heat soak into you as you both rested contentedly.
Thereâd just be a hell of a mess, a noise complaint, and a lot of explaining to do awaiting you two.
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