#like. that's her starter
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sympathy for cain
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#ryomen sukuna#fushiguro megumi#nobara kugisaki#sukuna#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#and here i thought i had finally drawn smth that didnt need the spoiler tag but unfortunately nobara has her eyepatch smh#crazy tht i end up drawing sukuna of all people when im in this mood#havent drawn the guy in a while fr starters#also Not the character i would have thought to choose to process my emotions for me but it fits very well#dont read into it :)#i dont like this piece too much tbh like its fine its cool im just in a headspace n this has all of it in it#this is why i dont typically like to draw to vent bc then i cant look at the finished product without seeing all the feelsbad behind it#but whatever . maybe todays chapter will fix me#oh yeah 2 fv captions in a row bc thats what u get when im emo. shame/rotten goes hard fr sukuna/yuuji
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this is the iconic dinosaur horror jurassic park wishes it was
#so there's this person on twitter who is like an infamous drama starter and got a whole forum shut down once#and they wrote this (different) book that's one of the greatest so bad it's good things i've ever read#a few great things that happen in that:#characters get in a car crash and flee on foot. later it's casually mentioned one character had both her legs amputated 'due to fractures'#the character pretending to be american by wearing maga hats that have spy gear built into them#the spy gear in question is an alarm that blares if someone lies in their vicinity#'stuff protocol ' said the queen. 'i'm getting hammered tonight'#the chapter where the prime minister is trying to watch the news so she keeps wandering into bars and tv shops and getting kicked out#the dragon that's casually described as 'about the size of 1000 elephants'#the dragon that's a 'dog dragon hybrid with a chihuahua body and a giant dragon head'#the dragon that's owner punched it in the face and only lets people approach if they 'do the iconic royal wave'#the characters being described as 'the short one' 'the guy with the beard' etc#but there being a lengthy detailed description of the characters in harry potter#'apparently a dragon had burnt essex to cinders in a matter of minutes'#anyways i found out they also wrote (a political parody of indiana jones???) for this book of kids short stories years ago#and you know. we needed to know#so it took me like 4 months to track this precious lost media down#which was very worth it because it turns out it's full of many other iconic gems like CELLAR HELL by Elizabeth Elgie (12)
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Don't think this counts as a spoiler as it's one of those background details/extra material stuff that the anime usually doesn't cover so I'm gonna make a post about it for the anime people
Due to elven beauty standards being VERY skewed towards the feminine, Otta
Is as butch as elves can tolerate before they start getting scared.
#im saying this also because i heard (havent seen the ep yet) that the dub might have given her a very fem voice#and like. shes not supposed to read like that. shes masc af for an elf#dungeon meshi#dungeon meshi anime#im saying this because its funny but also because honestly this should help you recalibrate#like. in earnest. the beauty ideals of the different races are very useful to understanding why certain characters are Like That#for starters: now that you know that Kabru was raised by elves you also know that for an elf hes like fucking rugged. like thats a manly ma#and it also explains why Marci's shapeshifter of Laios was all her being So Scared of his manliness#while Senshi's was a baby (the dwarven beauty standard is the exact opposite)#the canaries#otta
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braixen
(request)
#my art#pokemon#braixen#pkmn#starter pokemon#YAAAAY only took like 8 days working on off and on WHBDFJKHGB i reworked the pose a bunch#and im really happy with how it came out!!! i may have gone overboard with the shading but thats ok bc i had fun#when i was trying to figure out the fire i accidentally deleted the lining and i did not notice that i did that. so when i went to see if i#could get it back. i could not. so i had to redo the lining HAHA really annoying but its ok bc i still had the sketch and the coloring#using this as a segue to talk about my delphox lucky. my first non handmedown pokemon game was x#so it was a really big deal for me right. i was ten. i picked fennekin [i usually go for the grass starters but fennekin is one of the#exceptions to this] and to my delight my fennekin was a female. and to me that was the luckiest thing ever so i obviously named her lucky#i got her to max happiness and she was the first pokemon i leveled up to lvl 100 without cheating#the fennekin line will always have a soft spot in my heart and i will always include a female delphox named lucky in my dream team lineup
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Oh! The headaches. Definitely the headaches :)
...
And I can teach him so much more.
#ffxiv#endwalker spoilers#Erenville hasn't 'met' Fransi nor really has any conception of her existing#which is very funny because she CAN sass him back from Frog's subconsciousness#like when does Frog have to start introducing everyone she carts around with her#how do you explain Esteem first time you cast her in front of someone for starters#anyway I rushed through the end of ShB just so I could see Erenville again#sue me :P#ICONIC greeting second only to meeting Estinien as a Dragoon just on account of how I feel headaches yet to come over the horizon#also the 'look of the gleaner' thing is very much part of why Frog was so gleeful to get her hands on authentic gleaner gear :)
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doodlin some joh’s
#kagoodles#trainer kris#trainer ethan#trainer lyra#rival silver#green background bc I’m a spinach head lately. and a mustard green enjoyer bc i had some good potstickers that had it in the filling#kris to me should be a little cartoonishly malleable. a smiling smirker. like >:]#i also think ethan has a little unevolved natu on his team. purely for the “you can evolve when you feel like it buddy” vibe#been considering what to make team wise for the joh's but a fun idea i've got brewing is that lyra and silver Both have chikoritas#i know he canonically has a totodile but i have a fun workaround for the future that i'm workshopping a lil#when getting starters silver thought he stole the only chikorita in the lab. then when lyra comes in elm gives her a Shiny chikorita#12 year old absolutely devastated hammering fist on the floor mad but he gets over it (but maybe still a Little salty)#learns to mellow out a bit with his potato dino over time and the evolutions for both of their meganiums have different flowers/colors/type#i know i've been out the whole month i've been unfortunately stuck in the post midpoint of the sem where the workload is Crazy#been prepping works for an art show at my college And getting projects done for deadlines and it is. a Toll#but I will get One illustration done. i've been planning out lyra's dress for a piece and the second to last pic is the test for it
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day 6
#i kinda dont like this one much#i would have done something with more focus in the eyes#but honestly i am tired#and i wanted to draw rose#so i decided to listen to “when olivia matures into bravocat” by pengosolvent bc it reminds me of her#but i started getting emotional#but i dont think i managed to capture the feeling i wanted very well#but ill post it anyway#i want to draw more roses#im reluctant to put tags on this one tbh#doodle#rose lalonde#homestuck#cringetober 2024#cringetober#and FUCK i just realized i skipped gijinka#anyway theres still time#its not morning yet for me!!!!!!!!#starters fandom here i go
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shirahama-sensei reminded me she has a thing for the teacher from pokemon s/v so i randomly went off on an au where qifrey is the professor. etc
#witch hat tag#orufrey#the first image is qifrey dressed as that guy. i'm glad she has an inexplicable attachment to some dorky pokemon man like i do#someone was like 'wouldn't it make more sense for deanreldea to be the champion' .... well no. not in my world .#it maps onto magic skill. champions aren't like the Rulers of the land they're just the most skilled at this thing#oru as a burnt out champion who's gently encouraging a kid like coco to reach him one day means a lot to me. i like pokemon narratives#agott went shiny hunting for the same thing coco had but cooler - just to impress her. she really is a pokemon rival type girl#pushing myself to the limit to prove my worth to you - to get to the summit first so i'm waiting for you..#and then realising it wasn't just to be strong - i realised i started wanting to see your smile. i wanted you to have fun.#i think coco would defeat agott at the end of victory road and then defeat oru & i'll probably draw one last thing abt that at least..#the image is very cinematic..the dialogue and music in my mind..I WANT TO FACE ORU!!!!!!!!!!#the super cool insanely powerful awesome champion is the spouse of my professor and he gave me advice at the beginning...no way....#btw the elite four would be the sages which is perfect (and maybe easthies as the first guy?) evil Team Brimhats#coustas as their renegade gladion-type figure. the gym leaders would be like sun/moon and s/v combined#travelling around facing the best students from different classes - so jujy and eunie etc.#i've barely thought about 'teams' or anything bc i care amore about the narrative side of things always lol#but idk. tetia with a swirlix - eunie would be ghost type boy - riche with small things but also a ceruledge or a steelix something massiv#and brushbug would have a final form which is really long like an eastern dragon- fluffy and with wings like a fairy. It's beautiful to me#well anyway *tries to move on to the rest of life now the brief obsession has passed*#obviously oru would be fire-type tho and qifrey would be water-type and they set off together and traded their starters etc.....it goes on
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sourdough starter snack
/recently found out that live yeast might ferment in the stomach for a while if large quantities of it are eaten. think noises, think expansion. so this fic happened. uhh/
Jackie’s dorm room was quiet, save for the hum of the AC and the rustle of pages turning as she sat in the living room, reviewing her notes. She had a tendency to stay up late cramming. It was just past midnight, and the dim glow of the kitchen light spilled into the living room.
Jackie had been so wrapped up in her studying, she hadn’t noticed the soft sounds of someone moving around in the kitchenette until she heard the faint scraping of a spoon against a bowl. She glanced up from her notebook, frowning slightly. An hour ago, Sawyer had settled on the couch (trying to be considerate of Jackie’s roommate), but it looked like her stomach decided otherwise — a thought Jackie couldn’t help but find stimulating.
It wasn’t unusual for Sawyer to raid the fridge late at night, considering her appetite, but checking on her anyways couldn’t hurt.
Jackie slipped out of bed, quietly padding down the hall. As she approached the kitchen, the sound of the spoon grew clearer. Jackie had a pretty good idea what she was about to find.
“Sully?” she called out, folding her arms over her chest.
“Hmm?” came a muffled response from the kitchen.
When Jackie turned the corner into the kitchen, her suspicion was confirmed. There, standing at the counter with a big mixing bowl clutched in one hand and a spoon halfway to her mouth, was Sawyer. Her eyes were glued to the bowl, completely oblivious to Jackie’s presence.
Jackie’s eyes widened when she saw the unmistakable texture and bubbles of leavening. The bowl wasn’t just any bowl. It was her sourdough starter — weeks of careful fermentation and feeding, gone, or at least half gone, if the looks of it were anything to go by.
“Oh my God, Sully. What are you doing?” Jackie blurted out, rushing forward.
Sawyer looked up, mid-chew, her cheeks full. She swallowed slowly, then grinned sheepishly, as if she hadn’t just committed what Jackie considered to be the culinary equivalent of a felony.
“Uh… hey, babe. Eating cookie dough… duh,” she mumbled through another bite, lifting the spoon and gesturing toward the bowl. “I didn’t know you made some. It’s pretty good, but kind of tangy. Want a bite?”
Jackie’s heart skipped a beat. Her brain stumbled over itself, trying to process what she was seeing as Sawyer scooped up another spoonful into her mouth. Cookie dough?
“That’s not cookie dough, that’s—” she said, her voice pitching higher with every word. She raked a hand through her hair, trying to figure out how to break the news. “That’s sourdough starter, Sully!”
Sawyer froze, spoon hovering halfway to her mouth, and blinked at Jackie. “Uh… what?”
Jackie rubbed a hand over her face, groaning. “It’s sourdough starter. It’s fermented! Not something you just eat… raw!”
Sawyer’s eyes darted to the bowl, then to the spoon, which she’d been licking, then back to Jackie. The confusion was clear on her face, but slowly, ever so slowly, it began to dawn on her that she might’ve seriously messed up.
“Wait…” Sawyer furrowed her brow. “So, it’s… not edible?”
“No! Well, I mean, not like that!” Jackie threw her hands up. “You don’t just eat it! It’s used to make bread rise. It’s filled with live cultures and bacteria—”
Sawyer flinched at the word “bacteria,” her gaze flicking to the bowl in her hands. “It’s alive?”
“Yeah, as in yeast! You’re supposed to let it ferment for days to make bread.” Jackie pressed a hand to her forehead. “How much did you eat?”
Sawyer placed the bowl down on the counter, eyeing the near-empty contents. She hesitated, then shrugged. “I dunno. Like, a lot?”
“A lot? Sully, that’s—” Jackie cut herself off, taking a deep breath. “Sully, that stuff expands when it’s heated up. Who knows how much of that is sitting in — in your stomach right now!”
Sawyer’s eyes shifted down to her stomach, which now seemed even more ominous with the knowledge of what was inside. She gulped, eyes widening. “It expands?”
“Yes. And I’m fairly sure it’s going to make you really sick if you’ve eaten as much as it looks like you have.”
Sawyer’s expression began to falter. A hand instinctively moved to rest on her abdomen, and for the first time that night, she looked genuinely worried. Her belly felt like a rock had dropped inside, pressing against her insides as it expanded.
“Uh… now that you mention it…” she said, her fingers prodding lightly against her belly. “I do feel kinda weird…”
Jackie watched. Typically, this kind of situation would have her blushing; Sawyer had a habit of overindulging and feeling the consequences. But this time, what she’d eaten wasn’t just a bad call — it could really upset her stomach. Jackie wasn’t aroused in the slightest, only concerned. “What kind of weird? Stomachache?”
Sawyer paused, her face scrunching up as she tried to gauge how she was feeling. “It’s not, like, painful. But it’s definitely feeling… off. Like, kinda tight. Heavy.”
As if her belly was starting to rise like dough. Like bread in an oven. Live yeast thrives in warm environments, and the human stomach is warm. Particularly Sawyer’s gut, since Sawyer was like a living, walking furnace, always overheating.
Jackie was already thinking through their options. Nothing in her two years of medical studies equipped her for a girlfriend who had mistaken sourdough starter for cookie dough, and she was unsure of what to do when that sourdough decided to fight back in her girlfriend’s belly. “Okay. Well, your body’s probably trying to process all that yeast. You just ate half a bowl of fermented dough, I mean, we need to keep an eye on this.”
Sawyer stared down at her stomach again, a flash of panic crossing her face. “Oh, crap. I thought it was cookie dough,” she pitifully blurted, as if saying it louder would make it somehow less of an issue.
Jackie shook her head, reaching out to gently push Sawyer into one of the kitchen chairs. “Alright, alright. Just sit down. You’ll wake Willow up.”
Sawyer plopped down into the chair, slowly rubbing circles over the front of her tank top. “I just saw food, and I thought—”
“You just saw food and thought, ‘must eat now,’” Jackie put in playfully.
Sawyer cracked a weak smile. “Yeah, something like that.”
Jackie stood up, fetching a glass of water and placing it in front of Sawyer. Even though Jackie had never seen Sawyer do anything this stupid before, she knew Sawyer had pulled some dumb stunts in the past. Jackie realized that all Sawyer needed was a little patience and attention, and she would bounce back like new. “Drink this. It might help a little.”
Sawyer obediently took the glass and sipped it slowly. She grimaced, glancing down at her stomach. It churned, making thick, sloshy sounds, and she could swear she felt it expand just a little more with each passing second. “Uh, Jackie, I think it’s getting worse.”
At this, Jackie’s eyes snapped to Sawyer’s midsection. She hadn’t noticed it at first, but Sawyer’s usually flat stomach did seem a little bloated, like it was already reacting to the mass of sourdough starter she had so thoughtlessly consumed. The sourdough starter wasn’t exactly the villain here — it was just doing its thing. And it must’ve been having a field day in Sawyer’s stomach, bubbling, fermenting the sugars and starches it could find.
It had taken weeks to build it up, feeding it daily, watching it grow into a thriving colony of yeast and bacteria, preparing it to make bread. And now, more than half of it was gone, sitting inside Sawyer’s stomach instead of turning into a fresh loaf.
“We need to get you to the bathroom,” Jackie said firmly, moving to her side.
Sully gave her a wide-eyed look. “You think I’m gonna be sick or something?”
“We’re not taking any chances.” Jackie grabbed her by the arm, pulling her gently toward the door — no easy feat when Sawyer had both the weight and height advantage at a full head taller.
A deep gurgle came from the depth of Sawyer’s stomach, echoing in the dim-lit hallway. “Oh man… I don’t feel so good…”
“Well,” Jackie muttered, helping her girlfriend out of the kitchen, “you did just eat a half gallon of live bacteria and flour — perhaps more.”
They hurried the rest of the way to the bathroom, where Jackie eased Sawyer down onto the floor beside the toilet.
Sawyer leaned against the cool tile, looking utterly miserable. Her face had lost its color, and her curls, damp with sweat, stuck to her forehead. She groaned softly, rubbing her taut belly. “I can’t believe I’m gonna throw up bread before it’s even bread.”
Jackie snorted despite herself. “That’s one way to look at it.”
“Next time,” Sawyer said, her voice weak, “just label your bowls.” She could feel the heavy, bloated weight pressing against her insides, sluggish, bubbling uncomfortably as if everything inside was expanding and shifting, trying to find a way out.
It was only a matter of time before it all came rushing back up.
Jackie patted her girlfriend’s knee. “I will. But next time, just ask before you go shoveling random stuff into your mouth, dumbass.”
#belly expansion#belly kink#full belly#tummy noises#belly gurgles#stomach kink#stomach ache#bloated gut#stuffed belly#upset stomach#myocs#mywriting#sawyer jordanson#this is my first shot at a fic :]#i've had this idea in my head for suuuch a long time. so glad i finally get to write it out#ive been itching to trust#like the fact that sourdough starter just RISES. and expands. other similar words. etc.#and that bellies are basically the perfect environment in that sense? okay dude...#if im not lazy i'll fs write a self indulgent part two. think burping and#jackie resting her head on sawyers stomach to listen to her girlfriends digestion <3
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Things I've Said To or About my Cat
What are you doing?
Hey, get down from there!
How did you get up there?
What are you doing there?
I just fed you!
No, it's not time yet.
What? What do you want?
Oh my god, look at her!
Isn't she cute?
You are beautiful.
How can you be comfortable like that?
Oh yeah? Tell me all about it!
Just because you're looking at me like that doesn't mean I'm going to fall for it.
You're ridiculous.
Aww, look at her!
Did you have a rough [time of day]?
Did you miss me?
I know, I missed you too.
God, I love you.
All that playing must of worn you out.
You're just a big baby. That's all you are.
Oh, fine. Come on up here...
You're so soft.
I know, you don't like hugs but you're just too cute!
Well, that sounded pitiful.
What kind of noise was that?
We were having quite the conversation.
Don't tell me no!
Is it cuddle time?
Thank you for the kisses.
Hey, be nice.
There you are!
Where did you come from?
Well, hello to you too!
When she does that, it's bait.
Why are you so freaking cute?! Argh!
You're adorable. You know that?
#rp memes#roleplay memes#rp meme#roleplay meme#rp starters#roleplay starters#sentence starters#// yeah i talk to my cat like she's a human but NO SHAME AT ALL i love her
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Lovely-eyed. Death-touched. Witch.
I have never understood where the line is drawn, between sacrifice and self-slaughter. All the years I've been sacrificing for my friends sake, but at what cost? I love them, dearly. But what if I am sick of being the slaughtered lamb? The thought of being the protagonist of the story for once is uncomfortable, yet exciting. ( . . . )
# F̲I̲R̲E̲B̲R̲N̲D̲ ・゚― headcanon based, private and selective portrayal of Bonnie McCullough ; influenced by book and show ( the vampire diaries ) but not following either of the storylines ( mun is heavily anti j.plec ! ) ; currently re-reading the books but consider this version of our beloved Bonnie as canon-divergent and heavily worked on by the mun. 21 + only, m&pdni ! ger/eng, but I'll stick to german for longer novels/threads for now. ― ・゚
MAINS: @geisterwelt @ashbalfour @dopplgaenger @verflcht
NAVIGATION: 𝓅𝒾𝓃𝓉𝑒𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓉 l 𝒸𝒶𝓇𝓇𝒹 l 𝓇𝓊𝓁𝑒𝓈
( fyi: the muse and blog are still a wip and a lot will be changed within the next days/weeks, as I am still re-reading the books (hooked on book three) ! but i am absolutely thrilled to interact and plot with you ! )
#tag dump:#・゚― introduction : meet bonnie mccullough.#・゚― edits.#・゚― out of character.#━━ * ⊰ visuals / she might look like a fragile flower but her stem is made of steel.#━━ * ⊰ aesthetic / all power demands sacrifice and pain.#━━ * ⊰ quotes / flowers grow back even after they are stepped on an so will i.#━━ * ⊰ starters / forever writing a story in my head.#━━ * ⊰ threads / feel free to hit 'em with a plot twist at any moment.#userfakevz#she/her#f: the vampire diaries#tvd rp#rp promo#the vampire diaries rp#tvdb rp#supernatural rp#singlemuse rp
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stars and scars
#NO ONE BE WEIRD#now that thats out of the way im gonna rant about some of my headcanons in the tags:#for starters i like to cover kevin in scars#your typical battle scars and scrapes etc but also#i like to think transforming into ultimate kevin would have left some scaring on kevin#like how when you go through a growth spurt or gain a lot of weight or lose a lot of weight in a short amount of time you get stretch marks#but more grotesque because the skin would have been pulled and warped in a matter of seconds rather than over the course of a few days#as for gwen i just need her anodite form to look super celestial and fantasy adjacent#yeah i think that’s everything#kevin levin#gwen tennyson#gwevin#ben 10#fran does art
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carrot and sanji's dynamic is so important to me
#well for starters he's not weird around her which is awesome#they share grief about pedro (i miss him so much too btw)#their personalities fit so well i'm gonna cry#they gave sanji a lil sister imo#like not a ship post this is them being siblings#one piece#black leg sanji#carrot one piece
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“Ah! Tis complete!”
Angie giggles getting out of her intense focus and finishing up an art piece. She appears rather proud of it before turning to the one close by with a hum. “Ah! Better be careful not to look! This is God’s graceful piece and looking upon it may have you faint!”
#open starter#🔆Angie Yonaga🔆#//adding her cause..I use to rp as here so I’ll bring her back again#//also quick note. I use God instead of Atua like the English version as Atua is a real god in Polynesia and so I rather keep it ambiguous#//also due to how it was represented main game. anyway
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Day 8: Atomicycle
they're on a date
#warframe#warframe fanart#tennotober#tennotober 2024#i started out liking aoi simply because mag was my starter thus i had a natural affinity for her#but now i think i might actually ship her with my drifter#theyre smitten your honor (so am i)#also the rest of the hex know theyre dating before they do#warframe aoi#warframe drifter#my art
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Kinda want to write a one-sided ronance post S4 au (within a fix it obvs) where the older teens start actually hanging out and Stobin (eventually + Vickie)confuse literally everyone. They greet each other with cheek kisses, call each other babe (or "Stevie Baby". Listen. Robin calls him bud or buddy or bub or bubba or babe and it's like why so many B's?? Argyle is vibing with it though and joins the bud train) and one time at two in the morning had a coordinated ramble about the names of the cats they will eventually get. (Sassafras, moonshine, and Garborator)
Nancy and Steve haven't really talked about anything, other than Steve saying "hey. I'm sorry if whatever I said weirded you out. I was definitely a bit delirious and Robin and Eddie AND Dustin were all making comments about winning you back or whatever which is stupid, you made it clear where you stood with me. Which wasn't with me. That's fine. and like. Okay yeah when we were together I'd daydream about you being beside me in the motorhome but thats-- it was a daydream. I was sort of thinking I was gonna die and. I wanted to share a little dream that made me happy. And then got everything confused in my head and made it weird and I'm sorry. what I'm trying to say is I'm sorry for being weird and making things uncomfortable. I'm over you. I loved you then, and you were my first real love, and maybe if things were different I could love you like that again but. But neither of us want that or the same things out of life. And we'd crash and burn again. Plus you and Jonathan are together which is a non-starter. Cannot believe I forgot that when it was happening. Jesus. So. Yeah. Sorry for being not a great friend and hitting on you in the Upside Down." And Nancy had nodded and told him not to worry about it. He had been sort of bleeding out and planning on going back into the upside down. They could both be normal about it.
Sometimes Nancy and Robin try to have "girl time" at Nancy's suggestion because they're the only girls in the older group (sometimes. But Robin is not going to let that slip out) but it's awkward without a buffer. Robin is too nervous and rambles and Nancy is too annoyed by it. But they do get on well in group settings, and Steve and Argyle are actually the keenest to smooth over any awkwardness.
Robin laughs more with the group, and grins at Steve and smirks at Eddie and has a sharp tongue Nancy can admire. She's more comfortable with Steve around, insisting he sit beside her or on the ground in front of her so she can play with his hair. (And Nancy is shocked the first time she sees it, because Steve was notoriously protective of his "best feature", but she'd asked and he'd hummed quietly as she takes her fingers through his hair and put tiny, lopsided braids in it.) It's nice to see Robin less jumpy, and wonders what it would take to see more of the side of her Nancy only sees when Steve's around. She just wants to get closer to Robin. Wants a friend.
And somehow, beyond Nancy's notice, Steve and Robin's friend Vickie slowly joins the group. She wasn't involved at all in the spring, but has been hanging around Family Video and a movie night or two often enough that when she settles more permanently in the group it isn't a very big surprise. Eddie and Argyle welcome her in with open arms, Jonathan is only his normal amount of weary of new people, and obviously Robin and Steve are excited for their friends to be friends.
But it just doesn't sit right with Nancy. She can't pinpoint why, it just doesn't. When she sees Robin and Vickie giggling together, or having some back and forth banter that seems to feed into both of them smiling, or Steve throwing his arm over her shoulder, or Vickie leaning into Robin's space as they talk. She always sits beside Robin, Steve on the other, with Eddie beside him. It's usually a tight fit for whatever couch they're on, but the four seem happy as clams to not have any personal space. Once Argyle decided to lay across all their laps, and they just...let him. Finangled themselves so everyone was mostly comfortable.
Nancy figures she is uncomfortable with it because she hasn't ever had a close friend since Barb, and was possibly hoping she could be close to Robin along those lines. So seeing her so close with the others and mildly uncomfortable around her hurt, and seeing her and Steve incorporate someone unversed in the Upside Down into their little trauma club also hurt. Because what did Vickie have that Nancy didn't? That made Steve and Robin and now Eddie stick to her like glue? That made them want her there when she didn't know anything about what they'd been through and could probably never understand?
What made Vickie Summers so special that she's taken what should have been Nancy's place beside her friends? Because that's what really bothered her. It wasn't that Vickie didn't know, it's that Nancy felt she took her place. That Nancy wanted to be where Vickie was, and she didn't know how to ask for it. Asking, trying to talk about how Steve and Robin had bonded so well after Starcourt while she ignored them and then how they bonded with and absorbed Eddie halfway into their bizarre dynamic after vecna, would feel too much like begging or admitting that she isn't quite sure how to make friends.
Nancy is jealous. Jealous that she isn't friends like Vickie and Eddie and Steve and Robin are. That she isn't the one making Robin smile and giggle so cutely. So. She tries harder. Tries to be the friend that Robin and Eddie and even Steve deserve. She tries not to be annoyed by Robin rambling (it really isn't that bad, just. Not relevant. She likes heading Robin's voice, but thinks she could really work on having a filter.), or the way Steve always asks clarifying questions when he should really have known better, or Eddie talking half in different character voices. She thinks it's getting better, her relationship with them. But, still, Vickie is always there, glued to Robin's side almost as much as Steve is, and that always annoys Nancy. Niggles at her brain, that she doesn't deserve to be there because she didn't know what Robin had lived through and fought. Nancy did.
Eventually, Nancy figures out that she wants more from Robin. Doesn't want to be a friend she smiles at occasionally, wants to be the reason she smiles all the time. And that's terrifying. Because Nancy had never considered liking girls, never thought liking girls was a thing she could do. It was something other women did, not Nancy. She liked boys and always had, but. But maybe she always liked girls...too. maybe it wasn't something she that was one or the other. Being different in a town like Hawkins puts a target on your back, being queer in a town like Hawkins even moreso.
She's leaving Hawkins in the fall. But she thinks she wants someone to come home to. She wants Robin to come home to. Robin and Steve seem to be okay with it, from what she can glean of some veiled comments they've made that she's only caught now she's looking for them. They've made some remarks around the kids that make it seem like they'd be safe to come to, no matter what. And sometimes, some of the comments Robin makes about actresses seem a little...well. admiring.
They probably, hopefully, wouldn't hate her for this. And now Nancy and Robin have a friendship, she thinks she can. It's early July, and Nancy is going to ask Robin out.
She gets her alone, bites her lip, and asks Robin in no uncertain terms to go out on a date with her. Robin stares, mouth agape.
"oh," she says.
Nancy smiles, a little. "Yeah. So. What do you say?"
Robin blinks, and takes a shuddering breath. "Oh my god. I. Nancy I'm really flattered but I'm no-i dont- uhg. I'm dating someone." she groans, rubbing her hands over her face.
And oh. Nancy read the situation wrong "oh. Steve. It's fine! You don't like girls, thats--thats totally fine! Id just, um. That is,-"
Robin waves her hands. "No, no! I'm not dating Steve! You clocked me correctly. Definitely gay! Don't worry about that! Hah."
Something in Nancy twists. "Oh?"
"yeah. Yep. Not only am I a lesbian in a small town, I'm a lesbian in a small town that somehow also has a girlfriend." Robin says the word dreamily. Like she still can't believe it. Nancy's brain fills with static. She was too late. Too caught up with how she missed so many chances in the past, that she missed her chance now.
But Robin keeps talking. "And, like. Even if I didn't, I don't think it would have worked between us anyways. Too different, y'know?"
"what?"
Robin gestures with her hands between them. "Well, like. I like being your friend. But, I mean, I wouldn't date you?"
"why not?"
Blinking, Robin tilts her head. "Because of Steve?"
Something bubbles hot in Nancy. "What the fuck does Steve have to do with wether or not we would date?"
"Nancy. Steve's my best friend." As though that explains anything.
"yes? And?"
Robin looks uncomfortable, shifting sideways. "listen, Nancy. You're a good friend. And I've just rejected you. Maybe we should just. Ah. Leave this? I'm really sorry. I'll give you some space, just find me when you're ready?"
"no. What do you mean that we couldn't date because Steve is your best friend? Why would that have any effect on how you date?"
"it doesn't! Not really! Just. Nancy, you broke his heart. His soft, squishy heart! You kinda sorta cheated on him-details very unclear-and then just. Moved on. Pretended like nothing happened. I couldn't do that to Steve. Dating a friend's ex is a bad move. Dating an ex that broke a friend's heart is just cruel." She sighs. Looks sad. As though she isn't the one rejecting Nancy and tearing her apart for how a relationship ended almost two years ago. What did that matter, now? "You're my friend, Nancy. I like you! But even if Steve has moved on, forgiven and forgotten, and if things were a bit different given his full support for us dating if that's what I wanted, I think I'll always remember how he-- how much it hurt him."
"oh"
"I'm. Nancy I'm really sorry. I know how scary it is to put yourself out there, especially like this. It's not fair. I'm just sorry. But. It was true. Steve's the most important person to me. I couldn't ever hurt him. Not like that. Not even if he said he was fine with it."
Nancy stands and walks away. She doesn't cry until she locks her bedroom door.
#robin buckley#nancy wheeler#stranger things#ronance#one sided crush#spicy six#steve harrington#i just think a confrontation between robin and nancy would be really interesting#and robins feelings about things between nancy and Steve and how that would be something of a non starter for a romantic relationship#even if steve was like super cool with it i dont think robin 'held a grudge agaisnt steve for a year bc her crush had a crush on him'#would axtually let it go#and also nancy wanting friends! give her friends. i have so many emotions about nancy not really having friends#since barb died. :( i want her to have friends that she isnt dating ir wants to date!!!#finda writes stuff#finda's rambles#implied ships are#steddie#robin x vickie#robickie
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