#like. a lot.

[sunshinem0ths]

in the middle of my first mcd rewatch since i was 13, and though ive not yet finished season one i HAVE been looking at some fan content on here and ao3 and i cannot stop thinking about garroth and his relationship to irene, and subsequently how that would realistically affect his relationship with aphmau.

garroth, raised his whole life under the oppressive hand of a father who twisted irene's image so much that it became one of rigid, calculated monarchy. one kingdom, one will, guided by the light of the matron herself. garroth, whose brother, the high priest, uses a mask of faith and holiness to hide his true, sinister intentions. gleefully scorning her name under his breath, almost proud of how openly he bastardizes irene's image and somehow always gets away with it.

garroth, faking his death to escape a future where he willingly perpetuates this terrible cycle of oppression and lies all in the service of the ro'meave name; in the service of self. garroth, escaping to live in the service of others, to protect and honour the institutions the real irene fought to create. even still, his feelings towards his faith are muddied and his severance from the church leaves a gap in his life where there once was a steady hand, however cold and iron its grip. when zenix, his apprentice and first true friend he's ever had, betrays him, a cruel voice in his mind tells him that it is punishment for straying.

coming to serve aphmau as she ascends to the role of lord of phoenix drop is reassurance. it is the fulfilment of everything he's aspired to do. the reincarnation of lady irene, now living flesh and blood before him instead of ink on paper or towering quartz statues. she doesn't know it yet, but he does. he knows it in the way his body naturally wants to gravitate around her like the earth around the sun. he can feel his life's purpose reborn within her, he feels its ambient warmth when he stands by her side. through her lordship, he is vindicated. this is irene's will, not the tyrannical lie his father has fed him, his brothers, and all of o'khasis for decades. if one could call zenix his punishment for straying from his faith, aphmau is his chance for redemption.

it's also terrifying. it's all-consuming. her light is so bright it blinds him and he can't make out whether what he feels is truly love or the natural awe and devotion any good servant of the matron would feel towards their lady. one part of him extols aphmau, rejoices that all of his prayers for a saviour have been answered. she is not only holy but kind, and optimistic, and generous. she's touchable, though he would never dare admit out loud to even thinking about that. another part of him fears her, despairs at the notion that this is proof that he never could truly escape his duty. his very life is bound to irene, whatever her will is. no matter how much he struggles against it, he is fated to always defer to a power much higher and much older than him. free will was never an option, and never will be.

so garroth doubles down. he bows his head and kneels before aphmau, believes unflinchingly in her cause, stomps down and denies any doubt or cowardice he feels, even when it begins to seep into his actions and his words, as per his undeniable weakness. he will throw himself in harm's way for her, he won't allow the only hope for ru'ann to come to harm. he'll provide for her, he'll follow her anywhere, he'll protect her and her son and he'll never ask for anything in return. he'll content himself with admiring from afar and leaving small, subtle tokens of his affections, like an acolyte presenting offerings at a shrine. or, more fittingly, a loyal dog leaving detritus and small, dead things on its owner's stoop. he reigns his emotions with a swiftness that only comes from years of straightening his back and biting his tongue out of self-preservation, because he knows that she is not his to have.

but he, of course, has always, always been hers.

[askthe-littlepoet]

Insomniac? Insomniac Spider-Man?

[tommyactually]

i dunno if you guys could tell, but i really like tommy kinard

[rainbowcrowley]

oh... oh. :(

[altruistic-meme]

things ive learned today:

1. my nostril is apparently thicker than average

[transannabeth]

anyone else getting a lot of wonderbread ads on this site

[myreygn]

i had this dream once that i was walking through my grandparents' house and puss in boots was rummaging through the garden but when he came to the window to talk to me he was actually my friend in the body of puss in boots. she told me she needed to save the world and i wished her good luck, then she turned to my cat who was lying on the couch and said with antonio banderas' voice "see you later sexy" and jumped into a black abyss that had swallowed the garden and then i woke up. i think about that a lot.

[youngpettyqueen]

was tagged by @thebreakfastgenie- list 10 comfort shows, and tag 10 people! thanks for the tag!!

so ill be real I dont really do comfort shows very much? I have like, comfort episodes of shows, but I tend to go for comfort movies haha. ive been wracking my brain for a while and I really cant come up with 10 shows I would consider comfort shows, so I hope its ok that I only list 5

1: Doctor Who (2005) is the biggest one, ever since I was 12. I specifically tend to go for s5 - s6 episodes with the 11th Doctor, he's my favourite, I imprinted on him the second I laid eyes on him, hence my big tattoo of his sonic + bowtie. I used to watch Doctor Who every single day in high school, and would often use it as my motivation to just get through the day

2: MASH has become a huge one, lately when I need comfort I go straight to MASH episodes. I keep a list of comfort episodes (not just for MASH, for all my favourite shows) but I'll also sometimes just scroll through my options and pick whatever jumps out at me, even if its not on the list

3: The Mandalorian is probably the closest I have to a true comfort show, in that ill just rewatch the entire thing for comfort. if im having a bad week I can just put it on and be through it in a day or two. its my favourite of the Star Wars shows, and ive rewatched it more times than I care to count lol

4: Columbo is also very close to being a comfort show in that I could just put it on and let it play to shake off a bad mood. to be fair, though, I havent seen all of Columbo yet, I just find watching it to be very comforting

5: Star Trek (TOS and TNG) gonna include both as one since same franchise. I literally just wrapped up TNG last night but ive seen TOS all the way through a few times. TNG I target specific episodes, but TOS I could just throw on and let play, hard to go wrong with either tbh because even some of the really bad episodes are at least very very funny

since I only did 5 ill only tag 5 people- @onekisstotakewithme @cuddleswinchester @rescue-ram @persianflaw @appotheosis

[enderspawn]

Are you a Harry Potter fan? /gen

no, im not. at all

[radioactivedadbod]

welcome to radioactivedadbod dot com where I have a LOT of opinions on superhero costuming

[fantoccia]

△ A lot of your friends are mortal. What will you do when they die?

7/10

Cry a lot probably.

[notmyfaul-t]

sapphic yearning is unbelievable.

it’s going to bed thinking of them, dreaming about them while you sleep, just to wake up and start wanting them all over again.

wanting to hear them say your name, because your name sounds prettiest when it comes out of their lips. needing to hear them repeat it, no matter how many times you’ve heard them say it.

worshipping their body and their voice and their mind. searching for ways to satisfy them. learning everything you can about what they like and what they want. devising intricate plans and strategies to make them happy.

writing narratives in your mind to exalt them. detailing just how special they are. chronicling the ways that they have affected you. that they are affecting you. trying to find words that are commensurate with the longing you feel; discovering that there are none; manically throwing together sentences and imagery that fail to capture even a fragment of what you experience around them.

seeing sparkles in the air when they’re with you. watching those sparkles begin to dissipate as they leave. desperately trying not to let them go out. feeling the absence of their light. sitting and waiting for the next time they’ll fill your world with colors you never knew existed.

listening to them speak, and drinking on their every word like nectar from a honeysuckle. so sweet and so golden… but also so, so precious. sipping at it leaves you wanting more. and there’s never enough.

god.

[pummelingbat]

hmm i should scan all the elden ring art in my sketchbook sometime this week. for the birthday.

[practically-an-x-man]

for Tea and Books Asks, 5, 6, 7, 8 <33

thank you!!!

5. Do you have a favourite film soundtrack?

How To Train Your Dragon is always and forever in my heart as #1, but a few other favorites would have to be the Annihilation soundtrack and the Wakanda Forever soundtrack.

In terms of mixes (as opposed to composed songs), I really like the song choices in 6 Underground

6. What does your dream home look like?

Hm, tough one. I guess I don't really have a dream home at the moment? I'm in college rn so I'm mainly still in a place of dorms/apartments and haven't really gotten to thinking about anything more. I guess just someplace where I can have my pets and my instruments and not have anyone bother me about either.

7. What makes you feel better on gloomy days?

My dog and hedgehog, singing along to my good playlist, movie marathons, and what my mom calls "frozen calorie coffee drinks"

8. What are your top three films? Books?

Films: Ex Machina, How To Train Your Dragon, Bohemian Rhapsody

(honorable mentions because it's so hard to carve it down to just three: Bullet Train, the McAvoy X-Men timeline sans Dark Phoenix, Ron's Gone Wrong, the Princess and the Frog, Annihilation, Pan's Labyrinth, 6 Underground, The Little Stranger, 2021's the Suicide Squad, both Deadpool movies, and Warm Bodies)

Books: Good Omens by Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, Misery by Stephen King, the Market of Monsters series by Rebecca Schaeffer

(once again, honorable mentions: the Warm Bodies series by Isaac Marion, American Gods by Neil Gaiman, Bullet Train by Kotaro Isaka, The Mist by Stephen King, Reboot by Amy Tintera, and the Princess Bride by William Goldman)

[dozydawn]

nimble, a border collie-papillon mix, wins the 12” class in the 2024 masters agility championship. the first time a mixed breed has won at westminster ever.