#like who is this random side character or does this have a dvd release

[iguessitsjustme]

Listen. Do I know it's a bad idea to go into the MDL comments? Yes. Do I do it anyway? Of course I do. I'm nosy. I want to see what disasters are happening in there.

[tcm]

Revisiting Oscar-Nominated and Winning Pictures By Susan King

We all have our favorite Oscar winners that we love to watch over and over again. But there are numerous Oscar winners and nominees that have gained new life thanks to TCM, HBO Max and DVD that are definitely worth revisiting. Here are some of my favorites:

RANDOM HARVEST

I interviewed the legendary funny man Carl Reiner a few months before his death and the conversation drifted to RANDOM HARVEST (’42) and how much he loved the romance. Robert Redford is also a fan. In the 1990s, he was planning on doing a remake, and in 2014, it was announced that Julian Fellowes (Downton Abbey) was hired to pen a remake. The handsome MGM production based on James Hilton’s bestseller starring Ronald Colman and Greer Garson was a huge hit that year and was nominated for seven Oscars including Best Film, Actor for Colman, Actress in a Supporting Role for Susan Peters and Director Mervyn LeRoy. 

Both Colman and Garson had great success in other Hilton adaptations – Colman starred in LOST HORIZON (’37) and Garson made her U.S. film debut and earned her first Best Actress Oscar nomination in GOODBYE, MR. CHIPS (’39). RANDOM HARVEST is often overlooked by the other big MGM film released in 1942, William Wyler’s MRS. MINIVER. Not only was the stirring drama about a British family attempting to survive the years of World War II a blockbuster at the box office, but it also won a striking eight Oscars.

But I think RANDOM HARVEST is the more engaging film. It’s hard not to fall in love with this romantic tale with Colman at his most dreamy as a shell-shocked amnesiac veteran of World War I (Colman was wounded in the global conflict) named Smith who falls in love and marries a loving young entertainer (Garson). But Smithy, as Garson’s Paula calls him, is hit by a car on his way to a job interview and wakes up with no memory of the past three years but does remember who he really is – an aristocrat by the name of Charles Rainier.

Will true love reunite these two? The sigh level is very high with RANDOM HARVEST and this love story has a very strong place in my heart.

NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART

I’ve had more than a few people ask me why I like NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART (’44) so much. It’s depressing, they say. It’s downbeat, they say. But I think it’s a chance to see Cary Grant in a rare break out of his “Cary Grant” suave, sophisticated image. Adapted and directed by Clifford Odets from the novel by Richard Llewellyn (How Green Was My Valley), NONE BUT THE LONELY HEART casts Grant as Ernie Mott, a Cockney drifter who returns home to his Ma (Ethel Barrymore).  When he learns that she’s dying of cancer, Ernie stays to help run her second-hand shop. But Ernie can’t stay out of trouble, joining forces with a gangster stealing cars and pursuing the mobster’s wife (June Duprez). 

Meanwhile, his neighbor Aggie (Jane Wyatt) is madly in love with him and tries to save Ernie from a life of crime. The film was generally warmly received, earning four Oscar nominations and winning supporting actress for Barrymore. She shot her scenes during her two-week vacation from her Broadway triumph The Corn Is Green, and the Academy Award transformed the Broadway star into a much-in-demand film actress. She would go on to earn three more Oscar nominations.

Grant, who had earned his first Oscar nomination three years earlier for PENNY SERENADE (‘41), didn’t attend the Academy Awards where Bing Crosby won best actor for GOING MY WAY. Grant never earned another Oscar nomination, but received an Oscar honorary in 1970.

NIGHT MUST FALL

Handsome and charismatic Robert Montgomery was one of MGM’s top leading men in the 1930s, best known for his work in comedies including PRIVATE LIVES (’31) and FORSAKING ALL OTHERS (’34). Though he did an occasional dramatic part, nothing really stretched him as an actor until NIGHT MUST FALL (’37). Montgomery had long been bugging MGM head Louis B. Mayer for better roles. He supposedly allowed Montgomery to do NIGHT MUST FALL because the studio head thought the actor would be embarrassed when the movie failed. Montgomery later said, “they okayed me playing in it because they thought the fan reaction in such a role would humiliate me.” He went so far as to help subsidize the film’s production budget.

Based on the play by Emlyn Williams which ran on Broadway in 1936, NIGHT MUST FALL finds Montgomery playing Danny, a serial killer who just happens to have a trophy from his latest victim—her head—in a hatbox. Danny charms his way into the heart and home of a wealthy elderly woman (Dame May Whitty, reprising her London stage role). Rosalind Russell, who made five films with Montgomery, plays the elderly woman’s niece who has her suspicions about Danny but can’t convince her aunt that she’s in danger. Both Montgomery and Whitty earned Oscar nominations.

Though Montgomery returned to the comedy genre after NIGHT MUST FALL, he began directing films such as LADY IN THE LAKE (’46) and found great success in TV in the 1950s with the anthology series Robert Montgomery Presents, which often featured his daughter Elizabeth.

THE NAKED SPUR

Jimmy Stewart’s image took a 180 degree turn in the 1950s thanks to Alfred Hitchcock with REAR WINDOW (’54) and VERTIGO (’58), but most notably in the five Westerns he made with Anthony Mann. Far from the boy-next-door character he played pre-World War II, Stewart was transformed into conflicted, troubled men – anti-heroes who often could be as villainous as the bad guys who peppered these sagebrush sagas. (Mann also directed Stewart in three non-Westerns).

THE NAKED SPUR (’53), which earned a screenplay Oscar nomination for Sam Rolfe and Harold Jack Bloom, is my favorite of their collaborations. Stewart really digs deep into the character of Civil War veteran turned bounty hunter, Howard Kemp. He’s angry and bitter having lost his land during his conflict. Kemp hopes he can get his land back by working as a bounty hunter. And he’s doggedly determined to get outlaw Ben Vandergroat (a fabulously vile Robert Ryan). Along the way, he encounters two men (Millard Mitchell and Ralph Meeker) who join him on his journey. And when he finds Vandergroat, he also discovers he has a young woman (Janet Leigh) with him. Intelligent, often disturbing and brilliantly acted, THE NAKED SPUR is an exceptional exploration of the dark side of humanity.

[cyanide-latte]

You know who I am gonna ask for, let's be honest. Freddy Krueger. Lay it alllll out!

[Was planning on drawing an entire comic response to this with all the Freddys making appearances but I don't have enough image space on a Tumblr post without separating into reblogs, and I don't have the time or energy lately, let alone the patience to draw multiple variations of his face in several panels. Also it should be noted I started this prior to my undercut, hence the hair.]

What do I love most about Freddy? Uhhh... If I'm being genuine, the unique nature he's got among the wide array of slashers. I think Wes Craven was utterly brilliant coming up with the character, and the nightmare sequences in-film are spectacularly executed.

If we're talking dislikes, that's an entire list. I should probably save it for a separate post, tbh. I've nursed a long grudge against Freddy since my early childhood and that's not exactly gone away yet, even if he's grown on me and I can appreciate him now. For now I'll just say I really don't like having competition for being the most obnoxious-yet-charming bitch in a room.

Got several favorite quotes from this bastard but I'll only list two. "Every town has an Elm Street" is probably the one I quote most as an adult and it's on some of the fan merch I own. But apparently the quote that stuck with kid me for years was "I am eternal" and I forgot it was a Freddy quote until this year and when I saw the GIFs of him saying that I just had an "oh you motHERFUCKER" moment.

BROTP: Can the various Freddys tolerate each other? Probably not, but I can't see him really having friends to even have a BROTP otherwise.

OTP: ...okay, this one should probably get a doodled comic at some point.

NOTP: Quentin. This one shouldn't bear explaining.

A random headcanon I've had for a while that I'm still a little on the fence about is that he probably always had some dormant hypnokinetic abilities. Probably unaware of it most of his life, but could tap into it during his dreams and it likely tied into his coping mechanisms. Unfortunately, his powers didn't actually have a chance to manifest until after the rather awkward business of dying.

Unpopular opinion time? *deep breath* The 2010 reboot had potential, really powerful potential, and the real tragedy of the thing isn't the fans comparing it to the OG '84 film (though that does get old fast.) The comparisons are inevitable. It was the fact that the OG script for 2010 was loads better than the final product we got, and the fact the theatrical ending killed it. I'm glad the "alternate" ending survived to DVD/Blu-Ray release because it's good. If we'd had that as the theatrical ending instead of what we'd got? While it wouldn't have saved the film from some of the jumbled writing and CGI that aged poorly, it would have made the entire thing better. The '84 film was about facing fear, whereas if the "alt" ending was kept in 2010, we would have had a very powerful story about facing one's abuser and overcoming trauma. And it's a shame and a travesty we were robbed of that, because it's a story I think is always needed.

Song that reminds me of him? Ignoring the obvious options and likewise ignoring the fact I should have made a playlist by now and haven't... In general The Python's Song reminds me of him more than it reminds me of Kaa, (despite it having been part of The Jungle Book OST my entire life.) If you wanted something more on the shippy side and you don't mind metal, Black Wedding by In This Moment is one I easily tend to associate with Freddy as well.

I'm not sure if I've picked a single favorite image of him yet, tbh. One day though!

[okayto]

Mini-Review: Inuyasha

15-year-old modern schoolgirl Kagome and grumpy half-demon Inuyasha reluctantly team up to recover the pieces of a magical jewel that were scattered when Kagome fell down a well into magic-filled feudal Japan. On their quest they team up with a monk, a demon slayer, and a young fox demon while trying to stay ahead of the large number of people who want one or all of them dead.

This counts as a classic now, right? I remember plenty of Inuyasha cosplays (including me as Kagome for Halloween once), fanart, and the rare anime merch in real stores while the original series aired in the early aughts. But despite that, I wasn’t a dedicated watcher at the time. Which ended up to my advantage, because now the entire series is easily available.

The premise is simple: Kagome falls down a well at her family’s shrine, and comes out the other side in feudal Japan. She’s attacked by a demon that wants to acquire the magical Shikon Jewel embedded in her body, awakens and is saved by the grumpy half-demon Inuyasha, the jewel shatters, and now they gotta go put it back together. Only, Kagome is the reincarnation of Inuyasha’s former girlfriend, the priestess Kikyo, and the two parted on bad terms each believing their lover had betrayed them. (It was a trick by series Big Bad Naraku, but still.)

And because nothing is ever simple, Kikyo gets brought back to life at one point for Reasons, then proceeds to spent a chunk of the series alternating between helping random peasants (because she’s got such a nice soul) and trying to kill Inuyasha and co (because breakups suck).

This is not an intellectual series, but it is a fun series. Mostly. There’s lot of action, lots of magic and demon-slaying, and the occasional respite/comedy break when Kagome heads home because she’s got a school exam, or needs to stock up on snacks, and say hi to a family who is super chill about their teenager just gallivanting around 500 years in the past, using her archery skills to avoid being eaten for dinner.

Yes. In this portal fantasy the portal remains open, allowing free crossing back and forth, which is convenient. I remain, however, mystified by how far the characters seem to travel while always remaining within a fairly easy trip back to their home base where the well is.

In general, you can’t think about it too hard. It won’t hold up, it’s not supposed to hold up. This is a feudal Japan where no one cares that Kagome is running around in a miniskirt, riding a bicycle and eating cup noodles and bags of chips.

On one hand, Inuyasha, like many action series, is great for the casual viewer: after a brief introduction at the beginning, you know the basic setting and the rest of the story in any given episode is easy to figure out (usually: this brightly-colored character wants to harm these other ones and/or steal their weapons). But what’s fun when viewed in short doses gets old if you’re trying to cram it. Not because it’s bad, but binging does make its flaws more obvious.

Its main flaw is that every single character needs to take a course in communicating.

To be clear, every main character has the emotional intelligence of a sleep-deprived sixth grader. Inuyasha isn’t alone in this, but the number of fights that compelled me to yell please work out your interpersonal drama later when demons are not actively trying to kill you was...a lot.

(Don’t worry, there’s plenty of arguing when they’re not dealing with murder attempts, too!)

Okay, so, why watch? I mean, sometimes you just wanna see cool magical people fighting other magical people in ridiculous ways? I mean look at these people!  You’re not going to mix any of them up with anyone else, huh? And the colors, nice and bright!

Also, initial-minor-antagonist-who-refuses-to-admit-he-would-ever-willingly-be-nice Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha’s older half-brother? He was popular eye candy back then, and he’s still pretty now.

Now, my roommate and I watched this over the course of many months, which is what I recommend. It’s a long series (193 episodes total, excluding movies), and why rush it? A plus to watching now is that the series is complete: the original anime ended before the manga, so 163 episodes in, it just...doesn’t resolve. But a few years later, Inuyasha: The Final Act was released and completed the story.

Even so, the show is long enough that unless you’re really enjoying it, you can go ahead and skip the filler episodes that were stuck in the original run. Just google “Inuyasha filler” and you’ll find multiple lists.

Verdict

English dub? Yes

Visuals: I mean, the first 167 episodes are from 2000-2004, so the aspect ratio is 4:3, but it’s held up OK. Character designs are colorful and distinctive. This isn’t going for anything close to realism, but it’s fun to look at.

Worth watching? Yeah, probably. Sometimes you just need a silly action show, and Inuyasha delivers in spades. It’s not perfect--monk Miroku’s lechery and groping is treated as a small character flaw and usually played for laughs, which gets old real quick. A lot of the side characters are legitimately fun as well, from Sesshoumaru’s little entourage Jaken and Rin (does he care about them? he’ll kill you before admitting it) to Kagome’s easygoing family to the recurring wolf demon allies.

Overall, I think I have to hold a long-running fantasy action show to a different standard of “is it good” than I do, say, something with 12-26 episodes. It’d have to get to the point quickly if it was shorter; even skipping the filler, this is the adaptation of a 56-volume manga so there’s just going to be a lot of adventures where the entire point is just “characters get [magical weapon/power-up/knowledge] and beat up some bad guys.” There’s something fun and also comforting in knowing it’s not going to get deep.

Where to watch (USA, as of November 2020): Hulu (sub and dub episodes 1-167, then 168-193 under the separate listing of Inuyasha The Final Act), Crunchyroll (sub and dub episodes 1-54), Netflix (sub and dub episodes 1-54), Viz.com (sub and dub episodes 1-193); multiple blu-ray and DVD sets

Click my “reviews” tag below or search “mini review” on my blog to find more!

[thescribe]

Discogs Random Pull: Entry 1 10/17/20

{If you’re a physical collector of music, then I’m sure you have moments where you want to listen to something but can’t decide. I’ve become very fond of using discogs’ phone app to do random pulls from my collection. I’ll showcase that release with a partial review but also talk about why it’s in my collection. At the end of the day, our collections become the personal soundtrack to our lives. This will be a spot to force me to write about a raondomly pulled release and why I bought it in the first place}

EDIT: second picture used as an example of how the app from discogs works. From now on I’ll screen cap the first pick that comes up (as long as it’s something I haven’t covered) and write about that release. PS, that Palace of Worms/Mastery split from The Flenser in the photo is worth seeking out for fans of atypical Black Metal

Pig Destroyer-Natasha

To be perfectly honest, I haven’t thought about this release in quite some time. But, not only have I always had a love for Pig Destoyer, but I also own a couple different versions of this release.

Originally released as an addendum to their full length album Terrifyer (2004) as a bonus full surround sound DVD audio and in this case a bonus LP (pictured above) on sides C/D; the band and Relapse Records re-released it as a stand alone in 2008 with brand new artwork and the obvious multiple colored record variants (also pictured above).

The single 38 minute track stands as a very odd duck for the band, but in retrospect points to some ground they’d cover more later on. It plays out as almost like an old radio program. Part story, part musical. The musical sections wash in and out of swirling noisescapes to deliver a ghost story where the character is reminiscing over a lost love that eventually returns from the grave as an oversized apparition that consumes the character at the end in quite a bloody finale.

Musically PD are doing more of an almost Death Doom style as opposed to their normal output of infectiously catchy riff heavy Grindcore. There’s moments where JR Hayes is almost doing clean vocals, although it’s closer to talk singing then any type of melodic fair. With the high quality production value and the crushingly heavy moments of music, I find myself really enjoying this listen, and it’s probably been a good 6 or 7 years since I’ve put this on.

Sometime around the year 2000 when I was a senior in high school is when I got exposed to Pig Destroyer, which was probably through the split 7” with Isis (a band that I followed quite early on) but can’t exactly remember if that or 38 Counts of Battery (a compilation of most of PD’s early output) came first. When Prowler In The Yard came out in 2001 and learning that the guitarist Scott Hull was also in Agoraphobic Nosebleed, who I had first heard through the The Poacher Diaries split with Converge a year or so before, I became very much obsessed with following both bands.

These were very much the days where I was buying CD’s mostly and my horribly bad habit of buying and tracking down records didn’t start until around 2007. So, the first version of this album that I bought was the CD/DVD combo of Terrifyer. At the time I was living at a friend’s house and didn’t have surround sound and can vividly remember that the first time I actually got to play the DVD audio was at the house of a close friend and band mate that I had at the time. He was a huge horror movie fan and I remember us both loving it but chalked it up more to an audio experiment then something that could be performed live.

As I mentioned, I started heavily buying records around 2007 and I remember that Terrifyer was one of the earlier albums I purchased. What surprised me was that Natasha was apart of the record (not on current represses). The couple of times I heard Natasha prior to this was always at someone else’s place because I didn’t have the surround sound to play the DVD. This would really be the time where I got more acquainted with the track and then surprisingly a year later, Relapse would reissue Natasha as a stand alone release.

Funny enough, the fact that I had gotten a first press of Terrifyer would leave me to not purchase the stand alone version of Natasha for a couple of years. If my memory is correct, I didn’t purchase a copy until around the time Book Burner came out, which was 2012. I probably listened to the copy that I’m currently listening to a total of 3 times now. The last time I put this album on (which was only the second time) was when Mass & Volume was released. Another oddball release in the PD library, and the long form songs of Mass & Volume is what prompted that last listen for the stand alone record. I think that having that first press of Terrifyer is what usually prompts me to listen to Natasha, and I don’t usually pull out this single version of it.

For a first random pick to be a release that I don’t pull out often has been a very nice surprise to write about. Considering that the piece of music does actually come with some memories attached to it, it’s nice to dust off an LP that doesn’t get much love from my turntable. Hopefully, the more I do this segment, I get equally surprised by what the discogs app selects. And hopefully, if you use discogs, this might prompt you to give it a try yourself. Till next time.

[kingofthewilderwest]

It's anon-whose-dad-looks-like-McGucket again! He hasn't eaten any raccoons... yet... at least that I know of... XD Having fallen into this fandom hole rather aggressively with a lot of time on my hands, I have found the episode commentaries, graphic novel, and shorts. Are there any other behind the scenes or supplementary materials you recommend?

Hey there again! And bless, bless you for falling down the fandom hole.

As far as supplementary materials are concerned, I’m going to list everything I would recommend. I’ll even list things you’ve mentioned above, in case other people reading this post would be interested learning about GF extended materials too! I’ll be listing GF content in order roughly from “most essential” to “not so essential.” Note: this isn’t a comprehensive list of tie-ins. Also note: this list talks about spoilers from the show itself.

Journal #3. If you’ve already found out about the graphic novel and gotten your hands on that, I imagine you know about Journal #3 too - but since you didn’t mention it above, or if you were going to skip it over, I’m bringing it up now! Journal #3 is a *MUST*. I consider this book as essential to the Gravity Falls experience as the show itself. (Probably because the 1980s boys are my soul, life, and feels.) Journal #3 isn’t written to be a dump of monster lore, though there’s paranormal experiences in this book, of course. Journal #3 is a well-done narrative focusing on Ford’s hubris character arc and providing it amazing resolution. It also complexly dives into the relationship between Ford and Fiddleford, and to say that that narrative has ruined me and kept me awake at night would be an understatement. It makes the scenes and events of S2 more meaningful, and just… aughghgh. There’s so much to unpack there and I keep waiting for an excuse to yak about it.It’s also got several moments I wish could have been in the show proper (though I respect the need to cut for time and focus on the Essential Essentials, and think they did a great job prioritizing). If you’ve finished the commentaries (don’t know how far you are), you may remember Alex Hirsch saying they tried to get Dipper’s real name reveal into the show sev’ral timez, but ultimately cut it and left it for Journal #3. That scene definitely reads as “should have been in the show,” and it’s a great moment. Plus, Ford’s final remarks about “trust no one”? Ohhhhhh it’s so good, and makes the resolution to the show’s events all the better.

Journal #3 Blacklight Edition. Unless you can travel back in time to preorder, or have several thousand USD to spend today (no, I’m not joking, go onto eBay and cry), you’re not going to get your paws on the special blacklight edition of Journal #3. But there are people who have photographed important notes! Such as: [1] [2] [3]

Lost Legends. A  graphic novel with several short adventures. They’re all side adventures, but there’s some development on Dipcifica, and Mabel confronting her selfishness, that are nice additions and expansions to people’s characterizations. Wonderfully done, nicely arted, and feels like reading four new short episodes of the show.

The shorts, etc. I know you said you’ve gotten to the shorts, but there are so many shorts and promotional ads that I hope you’re going through the wiki pages and not just DVD menus to unearth everything. I don’t feel like pulling up my DVD to check, but if I remember right, some things like Creepy Letters from Lil’ Gideon didn’t make it to hard copy release?So anyway. I know some of these are easy to find and you’ve probably gone through them, but for the sake of thoroughness:

The Unaired Pilot

Creature in the Closet

Dipper’s Guide to the Unexplained

Mabel’s Guide to Life

Fixin’ It with Soos

TV Shorts 1 and TV Shorts 2

Mabel’s Scrapbook

Mystery Shack: Shop at Home with Mr. Mystery and its Outtakes

Old Man McGucket’s Conspiracy Corner

Creepy Letters from Lil’ Gideon

Gravity Paws

’Pocalypse Preppin’

The deleted scenes. The special edition DVD/Blu-ray provides a ton of S2 footage of the writer’s room, Alex narrating the storyboards, and through that showing us scenes that were cut or altered. There’s AMAZING stuff there, oh my goodness.It’s complicated finding all released deleted scenes materials, though, and honestly, I’m still trying to fish through the interwebs for more. You’ll find some released storyboards online for S1 and S2 that didn’t make animation. There’s a second long animation of Ford and Stan adjusting their glasses at the same time that made trailers but not “A Tale of Two Stans.” Or you’ll find things on Alex’s twitter page, like the now-notorious Dipper-snaps-Dippy-Fresh’s-neck-on-screen moment. And things like Bill’s initial introduction scene have been animated by fans. :)

Shmeb-you-unlocked website. I have fondness for this page because I love learning minor details about characters. This is a hidden website url you can uncover going through Lost Legends. Got some fun stuff on Anti-Mabel, Tate McGucket, and Pacifica, for instance. 

The Episode Commentaries. Seriously, these are the most enjoyable commentaries I think I’ve watched (outside of the LOTR cast commentaries, anyway). They’ve got insight into everything, from talking about character psychology, to storytelling techniques, to storyboard artists’ contributions, to how fans’ responses literally changed how the creative team wrote the show. 

The Special Features for the Special Edition DVD / Blu-ray release. All the special features on the DVDs are cool and enjoyable! Between the Pines, etc.

The Hidden Special Features. The Special Edition DVD / Blu-ray release comes with lots of hidden special features! Grunkle Stan’s hidden commentary for Land Before Swine is treasure. Like, Stan starts rambling about his childhood and embarrassing stories about Ford and stuff… it’s amazing. There’s also a Bill special feature that I love. 

Cipher Hunt! Most of it’s just fun, but it’s wild to consider that Alex staged an international scavenger hunt by choice. I don’t like road trips, but I would be very tempted to travel to see that Bill Cipher statue. Because I have… fandom issues. Haha.

Dipper and Mabel and the Curse of the Time Pirates’ Treasure! Though I’ve entertained myself with this, I don’t recommend this as highly as the other stuff on here. But if you want to keep living Gravity Falls, this is one of the books out there with original non-show content. There’s even a few moments in this book that were taken from the unaired pilot or deleted scenes. It’s a choose-your-own adventure, has nice art, and stuff. While it is written by Rowe, I don’t consider this as necessary of an addition to Gravity Falls fans because the choose-your-own adventure doesn’t (to me) capture the deep heart of the show. It’s more of a light, silly, random what-have-you. It does have a hidden web link to a page with the Axolotl, though, so that’s sort of important?

The Games. Most games are simple online flash games with no informative or lore-adding content to them. You won’t get anything new out of them, so take or leave them. But ya know, they still pass time in non-objectionable ways. If you’re really craving ANYTHING GF, why the fuck not. That’s how I ended up playing them. Some games have enjoyable versions of the main theme… the Weirdmageddon: Take Back the Falls game did not have to go so rocking hard on the music, and yet it did. (I may have recorded the audio to the level select and stuff and added it to my iTunes library.)I know you’ve been watching me play Legend of the Gnome Gemulets on my twitch. The other games that I think are the most entertaining are Rumble’s Revenge and Pinesquest (mostly Pinesquest, but it’s a “sequel” to Rumble’s Revenge). 

And if you haven’t gone clue hunting and decrypting yourself, and don’t want to extend the effort to do so, the cryptograms page on the wiki is a must!

Alex’s old twitter posts have some interesting things too from time to time?

I hope I remembered the main things. And I hope this helps!

[ilovemygaydad]

part 3/? of punk!patton gets adopted by single parent logan

part one - part two - part four - part five - ao3 version - masterlist (includes asks)

pairings: one-sided pining moxiety, eventual logince, background pining remceit, mentions of past thomas/female oc

warnings: swearing, lots of emotions, anxiety, worry, sympathetic deceit (his name is DC), jealousy, sadness, one-sided pining, rivalry mentions, depression mentions, divorce mentions, being held back a grade, arguments, anger, crying, unhealthy coping mechanisms, embarrassment, like some angst (sorry buds but emotionally closed off patton is an angst fest), food mentions, possibly something else

***feel free to send me questions or comments! i’ll answer them to the best of my ability, and everything is tagged under “punk!patton au”

a/n: this one is.... so long

(a clarification: logan and patton aren’t really father and son--they’re more like legal guardian and child. neither of them were looking for a father/son relationship, so they agreed that it wasn’t for them. i just didn’t clarify)

a few weeks had passed since the whole clothes incident, and patton and virgil had actually become real friends

which was why patton was unnerved when virgil’s foot wouldn’t stop tapping in their first block class

patton scribbled out a quick “you okay?” on a piece loose leaf paper and nudged virgil’s leg to get his attention and passed over the note

a few moments later, the paper is passed back to patton, and virgil’s neat writing reads “yeah, just nervous”

“about what?”

“well... i was going to ask you if you wanted to join my family for our twice-monthly disney marathon on saturday. dad’s college friend comes with his son, dc. he’s a senior. everyone wears onesies, and we just chill and watch cartoons for the night. you don’t have to come if you don’t want, but i thought you might enjoy it.”

and patton’s like

oh

okay

this is... a thing

so he writes back, “sure. i think dc is in my photography class?”

and virgil passes the note back one last time, but the timing went poorly, and the teacher sees

she’s like “mr sanders. mr summers. are you passing notes?”

and patton rolls his eyes as he takes the paper and clips it into his binder “no, ms w. virgil thought that he’d missed some of the notes yesterday by accident, so i gave him my sheet so he could double check.”

and the teacher is like ,,,,,,, fine and goes back to teaching, but virgil looks over at patton and gives him this small, thankful smile

and if patton has some weird, fluttery feelings about it, then that’s fine

even though he doesn’t

(the note says “7pm--last house on zora lane downtown. you’ll know the one ;)” and patton finds it really cute)

so saturday rolls around, and patton picks out some pajamas to go in because he doesn’t have a onesie

logan had offered to buy him a onesie, but patton looked up one that he thought he might like, and it was nearly forty dollars. he refused to let logan spend so much money on something so stupid

he settles on a black muscle tank and black jogger sweats because there’s no way he’s going to break his aesthetic for a disney marathon

he does wear his glasses, though, because he doesn’t want to deal with the hassle of taking out his contacts before going to sleep and then putting them back in before anyone wakes back up, and he’s too blind to just go without

and he hates how the huge, square frames look on his face, and the lenses are so damn thick

but he wears them anyway because he has to

logan drives him to virgil’s house and it definitely wasn’t because logan was hoping to catch a glimpse of virgil’s dad what???

virgil was right--his house was so easy to find. it had a ranbow flag flying by the door, and about twenty little rainbow pinwheels stuck around the garden

it was either the sanders’ house, or it belonged to the world’s most excited five year old

the thing is, virgil didn’t mention that it was huge with gigantic fucking windows and a chandelier that was visible from the fucking street

patton gives a quick goodbye to logan and goes up to the door. he rings the doorbell, and almost immediately, the door swings open. there’s a tall man in a stitch onesie and round glasses smiling at him, and all patton can choke out is a small “hello”

and this man squeals

like

squeals

and then he says, “you must be patton! virgil has told us so much about you--come in!”

it isn’t like patton is just going to say no, so he walks inside and follows this stranger through the house, looking around as they go

the place is just as big as it looks from the outside. there’s a formal dining room to the right and a large office to the left

patton wouldn’t really call the dining room “formal,” however, since all the chairs and the table are random colors and sizes and styles

but that doesn’t even mention the vast foyer with floating stairs to the second level on the left side of the hall and bridging to the upstairs on the right

patton couldn’t believe he was somewhere so fucking nice

they keep going and patton gets a few glimpses of the shiny kitchen and lush living room as they head through a door to the basement

disney music filtered up the stairwell as they descended into the finished basement

it smells like cookies and popcorn

they round the corner and there’s a little entertainment area with a rainbow of giant, fluffy bean bag chairs and a very large flatscreen tv that was currently on the main screen of winnie the pooh

there was also a bookshelf full of disney DVDs (and even a few VHS tapes of the classics)

virgil, roman, and dc were sitting on a couple of the bean bags, but virgil immediately hopped up and threw himself at patton when he noticed that he was downstairs

“you actually came! and you have glasses!!!”

patton huffs out a laugh as he wraps his arms around virgil and hugs him back “yes, i did show up, v. i wasn’t going to stand you up. and, yeah, i do have glasses. i didn’t want the hassle of bringing my contacts and solution and shit, so i just wore my glasses even though they look stupid”

“that’s bullshit!” virgil almost shouts, but he quickly corrects his volume “the glasses look really nice, pat. i swear.”

and there’s that stupid fluttery feeling again

patton rolls his eyes as virgil releases him from a hug, and he’s actually able to get a good look at his friend

virgil’s wearing an eeyore onesie, which matches the disney onesie theme of roman’s mushu onesie and dc’s beymax onesie

patton almost feels left out in his regular pajamas, but he cuts that shit out right the fuck away

virgil gestures to the man who brought pat downstairs “that’s emile. he’s dad’s college friend, and you said you know who dc is already” he still points to the boy who was draped over his bean bag upside down and staring at them with his heterochromatic eyes—the gold one standing out against the darker birthmark around his eye. dc flashed a peace sign, and patton waved back

virgil turns his gaze to the cookies and popcorn set out in the middle of the floor by the tv “those are free to eat—just don’t get between dad and the snickerdoodle ones. he’s vicious. and, i’m only telling you this because i know for a fact that i’m speaking too fast for him to understand”

so they all sit down and watch the movie

patton decides to not notice when virgil moves from a pink beanbag to a purple one right next to patton’s blue one

the movie starts, and it’s all goofy and fun in the basement. the sanders and picanis are quoting the characters and singing along to the little songs

even roman, who signs along with a soft smile on his face

patton is kind of in awe at how relaxed everyone is

he’s also in awe at how freaking cold it is in the basement

he can feel himself curling up and shivering, and he totally regrets wearing a tank top

patton doesn’t know how, but virgil sees him shivering and hops up from his chair, whispering a hasty “i’ll be right back” before sprinting upstairs

when virgil returns, he’s holding a bundle of gray fabric that he tosses to patton

when the bundle is unfolded, patton sees that it’s a hoodie with cat ears and paws and a big pouch in the front

“sorry that it’s so cutesy,” virgil whispers. “it was the most black thing that i own...”

and patton just laughs a little because,,,, virgil’s thought process is really adorable and weird sometimes

like any hoodie or blanket would have done, but virgil absolutely had to get patton the darkest colored one

pat puts it on and instantly feels much warmer

after winnie the pooh, they change to black cauldron

roman whines for a little bit because “there aren’t even any songs!” but eventually concedes because it’s virgil’s favorite and he isn’t going to not let his son watch the movie on disney night

after that’s done, the adults decide they’re going to go to sleep

emile says it’s because they’re old, roman says it’s because he has yet to meet his prince charming in his dreams, and he is looking forward to it

as soon as the adults are gone, the teenagers move closer to the food in the middle

“so,” virgil starts. “it’s time for our gossip session. patton, you’re completely free to sit out if you feel uncomfortable”

“what, uh, does this ‘gossip session’ include...?” pat asks because honestly ???? he’s a bit afraid of what he might hear

dc decides to answer, saying, “usually it’s about what teachers are being shitty again, how classes are going, do we have any annoying group partners. that sort of fun stuff”

and patton just nods because that’s not bad at all

and then virgil does that cute thing like in the movies where he crosses his legs and rests his elbows on his knees and he puts his chin on his hands and he leans forward

you know

that thing

and he says, “sooooo dc. what’s up with that cute boy from school that you like? oh, what was his name? ryan? ray???”

dc rolls his eyes and crosses his arms, and his voice comes out clipped and low

“i don’t have a crush on remy sanders, who you already know because he is your cousin. first of all, stop doing that every time you bring him up. second, stop fucking bringing him up”

virgil just kinda goes “aw, bud, you totally have a crush on him!”

and dc flips out

“you fucking know how much i hate your teasing about crushes, and then you go and tease me in front of someone i barely know? at least i don’t do that! actually, you know what? maybe i will tell patton who you have a crush on because, fuck it! we’re letting all of our secrets out, anyway! virgil has a crush on—“

virgil cuts him off with a loud “STOP” and patton swears that time froze in that room as everyone stares at each other

“i’m sorry,” he continues. “it was so uncool of me to tease you in front of patton without your consent. i just—i think you and remy would be good together, even if it’s just as friends”

dc stands up and starts to march to the stairs “remy and i were nothing more rivals in school, and now that he’s out of the competition, we don’t have anything to connect us. just fucking drop it. i’m going to bed”

patton doesn’t really know what the hell is going on with this remy guy, but he knows some major shit just went down

he decides to focus on virgil instead of the twinge in his chest at the mention of virgil having a crush on someone

really softly, patton asks who remy is

“he’s my cousin,” says virgil “he’s technically the year above, but he got held back last year because of some personal stuff that messed with his school work.

“ever since we were kids, remy and dc were rivals in school. they were both smart and athletic and talented, and they wanted to be the best. they had a lot of chemistry despite the constant bickering, and i tried to get them to become friends instead of rivals. it never worked because remy spends weekends with his moms, so he couldn’t do disney nights, and on the days he was with his dad and could hang out, dc was busy with gymnastics.

“then, after rem got held back, they pretty much ceased all contact. i knew that both of them were hurting because they lost the thing that fueled them to be the best that they could be, but it was pretty obvious that they were missing each other, too.

“i just want them to be happy!” virgil ends, hunching in on himself

patton hesitantly opens up his arms

“do you... do you want a hug”

virgil doesn’t even answer; he just launches himself forward and pretty much tackles patton to the floor in a hug

he’s sobbing now, and patton doesn’t really know what to do, so he pats virgil’s back every so often and whispers nice things to him

eventually, virgil’s breathing evens out and he’s just sniffling into the soaked cat hoodie

patton slowly releases him and rubs virgil’s arms gently in a reassuring gesture

“i’ve never actually done this whole sleepover thing before,” pat says with a sheepish grin, trying to play up the act (even if it is partially real). “would you mind if i slept in your room?”

virgil looks surprised for a second, but then his face smooths out into a tiny smile

“yeah, sure. it’s getting kinda late.”

they pack up the leftover food and stick it in a cupboard by the stairs before going upstairs

virgil grabs patton’s hand as the make their way to his room because tbh he needs the comfort

patton doesn’t mind

virgil opens the door to his room, and it looks just how patton expected

the bed is straight ahead from the door and placed at the bottom of a large window with pink curtains. the blanket and pillows are floral patterned in pastel colors. there are tall, white bookshelves on both sides of the bed that are filled with books of all sizes and colors; however, they look to be organized by age and genre, starting with children’s books and ending with adult fiction and nonfiction. there’s a door that leads to what patton assumes is an en suite bathroom and double sliding doors to the closet. the walls are painted a very light purple, and the remaining furniture are all a slightly darker purple. there’s a wooden desk strewn with tons of office supplies and a vanity with a large mirror and makeup neatly organized in small plastic drawers

everything just screams virgil

while patton is busy ogling at the room, virgil had gone and grabbed a sleeping bag and extra pillow, setting them up on the floor

“i’m gonna go brush my teeth, so make yourself comfy in the bed!” virgil said as he walked into the bathroom

“woah, wait—i’m not sleeping in the bed! this is your house. you get your bed!” patton argues as he takes off the wet sweatshirt and looks for a place to put his glasses for the night

“nuh uh!” virgil sticks his head out the doorway, toothbrush in hand and toothpaste all over his mouth. “you sleep in the bed”

“you aren’t sleeping in that sleeping bag. i refuse to let you do that.”

“fine!” virgil went back into the bathroom, and patton assumed that the argument was over, but virgil came back out with the same fiery look in his eyes. “if i can’t sleep in the sleeping bag, neither can you. get your ass in that bed before i tackle you”

patton had never been so afraid of a 5’7”, 130 pound boy before

he quickly slid under the covers with virgil following after he flicked off the lights

within just a few minutes, both boys were fast asleep

there is so much warmth when patton starts to stir in the morning

he’s just so warm, and he loves it

he curls into the warmth, and for a second he thinks about falling back asleep

and then there was a soft giggle

patton jolted back, opening his eyes to see that he was face to face with virgil

he had been cuddling virgil

and virgil was laughing at him

“awwww, pat! you’re so cute when you’re asleep! you kept trying to cuddle me.”

“shut the fuck up,” patton grumbled, putting his glasses back on and slipping out of the bed

“but it was so cute!!!”

“and if you tell anyone,” patton growls (although, there isn’t much bite behind it) “i will end you. I have a reputation to uphold, and i won’t let you ruin it”

virgil just laughs and follows patton downstairs, teasing him the whole way to the kitchen

roman’s already there, sitting on the counter and stirring a bowl of something

“morning, dad!”

“morning, starshine. why does patton look so grumpy?”

patton slumps into a chair at the table all emo and grumpy, and virgil softly sighs

“i was teasing him, and he got a bit grumpy at me. i’m sure he’ll lighten up as soon as we have pancakes to eat.”

surprised, patton glances over at virgil. he was expecting virgil to completely expose him like the older kids at the orphanage had done, but virgil hadn’t. the smaller boy smiles gently and winks, sitting down next to pat

there’s this strong urge in patton to lean close to virgil, but he squashes that feeling down right the fuck away

“hey, has dc been down yet...?” virgil asks, and patton can see that he’s genuinely still worried and upset about what happened last night

“i am now,” dc announces as he walks into the kitchen

patton is Extremely uncomfortable right now

dc and virgil are just staring at each other when virgil speaks up again

“look, dc, i’m really sorry. it was super selfish of me to try and force your life a certain way based on what i wanted. i’ve always just wanted you two to be happy, but i let my own emotions get in the way”

there was a long pause, and for a second, patton thought that dc was going to throw hands or something

“i forgive you, virge,” dc sighs, and he sits down next to virgil. “i’m sorry, too. i was about to deal a low blow, and that was equally shitty.” he groaned and hid his face in his hands. “and you were right”

“right about... what, exactly?” virgil asked

“i have a crush on remy”

“oh. oh! oh my gosh, dc! that’s sweet! aw, i’m proud of you.”

patton has NO clue what’s going on, but he thinks it’s a nice family moment, so he decides not to intrude

dc and virgil chat for a few minutes, and patton stares at the table silently

it feels a bit like breakfasts at the orphanage where everyone else would laugh and talk and be normal kids

and he would just

sit

alone

all the while, roman had been cooking, and he shouts out, “alright, every-gay--i mean, except patton?”

“nah, i’m... i’m gay, too.” 

“sweet!” roman says with a sigh of relief. “every-gay, it is time for... cinnamon roll pancakes!”  

a huge--like, at least thirty--pile of pancakes was set in the center of the circle, and everyone immediately began to set pancakes on their own plates and slather the frosting on top

dc and virgil began to banter with each other and, against his better judgement, patton joined in

and it felt...

really nice

patton was getting to know virgil’s friends and family better, and it was so interesting to finally be part of some sort of family dynamic for the first time

then he looked over at virgil, who was stuffing pancakes into his face and

the feelings kind of hit him straight in the face

he’s in love with virgil

virgil, his best friend

virgil, who tried to defend him even after he’d been a total asshole

virgil, who... had a crush on someone else

patton almost drops his fork as a sick, sad feeling twists inside of his stomach

he can’t be in love with virgil because virgil doesn’t love him

for the rest of the morning, patton’s all fake smiles, and he keeps quiet

he says a quick goodbye to virgil when logan shows up to drive him home, and he sits silently in the car as logan chats with roman for a few minutes

he doesn’t turn around to wave at virgil

when he gets home, he immediately goes to his room and cries into his pillow

life was a lot easier when he stifled his emotions...

to be continued... in part four

asks are loved and encouraged 💖💖💖

tag list: @residentanchor @eeveeawesome @xionical @absolutesandersidestrash @stormcrawler75 @musikasworld @ironwoman359 @a-weirdo-with-a-computer @thegaypotatoroyalty707 @darkrainbow333 @ravenclawunicorn1 @noahlovescoffee @whymustibedraggedintofandomhell @romansleftshoulderpad @still-waiting-for-cookies @emounicorn2006 @lana–22 @angels-ofthe-sea @demonickittykat @lonelysoul43 @the-virgil-mary @five-second-cookies @noisywolfbatbakery @band-be-boss-blog @heck-im-lost@lamp-calm-sanders @patton-e @knightofbloodcancer @cloudchaser7 @really-sleep-deprived-nerd @era-eclipsed @khadij-al-kubra @anxiousmorality @are-you-really-sure-about-that @today-only-happens-once @notalwaysthevillian @backatthebein @sunshineandteddybears @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @emo-sanders-sides-loving-unicorn @dodos-in-damnation @some-lost-meme-boi @dead4sevenyears @spookyingarbageisland @the-poison-apple-of-art@radioactivehelena @the-melody-of-eliza @im-a-mess-aaaaaa @whycantihavemorethan32characters @broadwaytheanimatedseries @veryvirginvirgil @llamaavocado @unisaurioamorfo @caterpiller-tea @cornycornfriendo @simon-at-3am 

[amplesalty]

Christmas 2019: Day 8 - The Grinch (2018)

On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me...

Eight cans of Who Hash!

In and of itself, I feel this is a fine remake even if it cutesafies The Grinch a little bit. He complains in the original that he’s been putting up with Christmas for some 50 years and both he and Max look every bit of those 50 years but here he’s much more youthful here. It’s a very appealing design, very detailed with the fur but I am a bit confused as his attire. He’s seemingly naked but wears underpants to cover his shame, only to then wear furry trousers over that? He’s a very dirty, brownish green in the original but is much more vibrant here.

The original can seem like a bit of an acid trip at times with all the Suess babble and strange contraptions the Whos use and this pays homage to that during The Grinch’s Christmas heist as he pulls out all manner of interesting toys to help with his plot.

The Grinch himself doesn’t feel as one dimensional and there are times when he is quite hesitant to go through with what he’s doing or his eyes will widen with surprise upon hearing a point of view he never considered before, almost to a fault I’d say as it does dilute the big reversal in his character at the end.

Kind of like how that remake of The Lion King ruined ‘Be Prepared’, they turn “You’re a Mean One, Mr Grinch” into this sort of rap/hip-hop song which feels out of place. One positive musical number is this version of ‘God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen’ by way of West Side Story as this group of carolers suddenly mass and chase after The Grinch with perfectly synchronised movement and finger snaps.

I want to look at something more specific here though. I’ve mentioned it before but a lot of these Christmas movies I look at tend to be more recent releases and for once this is one I actually saw in the cinema last year. It was inevitable that I would cover it having looked at the original and the Jim Carrey version but I proffered to hold off on talking about it because I like to use the stillframes to highlight something amusing or to emphasise a point. It could almost be a fresh watch though as I really didn’t remember much about it going into it again.

Outside of the Minion short that ran before it that is, which had two Minions breaking out of prison. I dread to think what those Minions did to end up there. I think that’s included as an extra on the DVD/Blu-ray which I don’t have here which is a shame as I remember kind of liking it, mostly down to its lack of speech. I do appreciate being able to portray story and humour without using any dialogue, goes back to that whole Mr Bean kinda thing. It made for a positive entry into that franchise for me as I think it’s something people are generally a bit sour of, probably down to how annoying they can be and the watch they’ve been latched onto, especially those weird memes you get from people’s mums on Facebook.

There is some element of that here as there is some humour to be had from the reactions of the non-speaking characters around The Grinch like Max or the reindeer he takes in as part of his scheme and renames Fred. It’s nice to have those subtle moments where just an awkward glance can be funny, in amongst all the exaggerated behaviour of the Grinch and the loudness of things like a random screaming goat. Actually, that goat is pretty funny as well.

The original you obviously have stuff like the KARLOFF narration, the wicked smile The Grinch has upon thinking of his plan and him slithering through the house while enacting it. The Jim Carrey one, my big takeaway was the look of it. I’m really surprised to learn that that particular version actually got an Academy Award for Best Makeup, as well as nominations for Best Art Direction and Costume Design. The original was pretty unique with its strange colours and imagery but I just remember the remake being deepy ugly with close up, wide angled lenses and those intensely creepy looking Whos.

If anything deserves nominations for visuals, it’s this version. Very striking, bright and colourful in and around Whoville when all its Christmas lights are lit.

But you also have these great shots at times that reflect the action on screen, be it the expansive action orientated shots of the down with Cindy Lou dashing through on her makeshift sled or the more moody look at The Grinch overlooking the town from up high on Mount Crumpit.

Or this vast cave structure in which he lives but only occupies but some tiny fraction of. Like here, he and his dog sit at this grand dinner table with a relatively posh light fitting overhead and a fancy multi headed candle holder decorating the table. It adds to this sense of preteniousness and superioty he has. But, at the same time, the two feel a million miles away from one another and they both seem like small figures in this enormous room. It’s almost a reminder of how he is a small part of this great big world.

Which is another thing I like here, how it touches upon how neurotic The Grinch is. It’s something the Jim Carrey version did too with his being bullied as a child but here he’s just entirely shunned from a very early age and is extremely isolated now.

At the very start you’re dealing with his agoraphobia and his reluctance to venture down to Whoville to resupply, as well a startling reflection on all the comfort eating he’s been doing that have left his cupboards bare in the first place.The look on his face here is truly haunting.

Just being in Whoville amongst all the Christmas lights and revelers pretty much sends him into a panic attack.

Even though he does feel so cut off from everyone, there is a sense that he fails to recognise his importance to other people, shutting out one of the Whos who tries to be friendly with him and not really appreciating Max. It’s a bit of a weird dynamic, with Max seemingly at The Grinch’s beck and call, fetching him his breakfast each morning but it does seem like he’d do anything for him and even gets a bit jealous when Fred comes into the picture. Hell, Fred even comes back at the end to save the day so obviously someone cares. And what a fine head of hair he has too.

But even when you think you’ve had a Hollywood ending where The Grinch has been redeemed, and learnt that Christmas perhaps means a little bit more, he still has to deal with his social anxieties. When he’s invited round for Christmas dinner, he hesistates on the doorstep, clutching his head in his hands as he tries to talk himself out of going by proclaiming that everyone will hate him.

On reflection, despite all the colours, lights and beautiful vistas, almost like Gremlins this movie really is stark reminder of the bleaker side of Christmas and the internal battle people sometimes face with their loneliness and depression. Really not something I was expecting to find in an innocent little kids film. People like to talk about how The Joker isn’t just another comic book movie but is actually a deep look at mental illness, maybe The Grinch beat it to it a year earlier by wrapping up this sombre look at the psyche in a neat Christmas bow?

[dalekofchaos]

The Best and worst changes for the Original Trilogy

Been wanting to do this for a while, so here are what I think are the best and worst changes that George made to the Original Trilogy

The Good

The special effects enhancement. This is an obvious choice, but the re-releases do improve most of the effects in the film, with just a few exceptions. One might argue that the film’s original effects were part of what made it so good – after all, at the time of release the visuals were one of the major selling points of Star Wars. But most fans agree that there’s nothing wrong with bringing the original films up-to-date with modern special effects, and that certainly shows when you compare scenes like the Battle of Yavin where the older effects do somewhat break immersion, particularly if you are used to the newer releases. The improved laser blasts and lightsaber effects make the action scenes appear less scratchy, and improve continuity between this trilogy and the ones that come before and after it in the timeline. It would certainly be

Aurebesh replacing english. The Star Wars universe is vast, containing hundreds of aliens from different worlds speaking a variety of languages. However, in the original trilogy, just about everyone on screen spoke English - or as it's referred to in canon, Galactic Basic Standard. The Basic language is just that, the most basic language that most residents of a galaxy far, far away (and us, the audience) can understand, and for the most part it's indistinguishable from English. Except when written. Basic does not use the Latin alphabet of English and countless other Earth languages, instead Basic is written using Aurebesh. But Aurebesh didn't appear on screen until Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back, and even then, the Aurebesh symbols used were completely random. It wasn't until Stephen Crane of West End Games chose to add meaning to the random symbols when working on several Star Wars miniature and role-playing games that Aurebesh was officially "born." And in the 2004 DVD release, Aurebesh finally replaced any and all English writing that still appeared in Episode IV: A New Hope, most notably on consoles within the Death Star. The change is minor, to be sure, but it's one that gives a cohesiveness to the Star Wars universe and adds to its otherworldly vibe.

Biggs Darklighter added scenes. In an earlier cut of Star Wars, Luke was introduced much earlier in the film, with scenes of his life on Tatooine spliced with the capture of Princess Leia and C-3PO and R2-D2's escape. These scenes primarily showed Luke hanging out with friends, giving us a sense there was at least a little more to his social life than power converters and Tosche's Station. But these scenes also introduced us to a minor though pivotal character: Luke's best friend, Biggs Darklighter. However, I wouldn't be surprised if you do recognize the name (or hear Mark Hamill in your head saying, "Blast it Biggs! Where are you?") and that's because though these earlier scenes on Tatooine were cut, Biggs still appears in the theatrical release of Episode IV - albeit very briefly. During the attack on the Death Star, it's Biggs flying alongside Luke and Wedge Antilles when they make the final and successful trench run to destroy it. Biggs doesn't survive that trench run and we see the effect his death has on Luke, but we aren't told why Biggs was important to Luke (as opposed to the countless other Rebel pilots who died). Without any earlier scenes setting up the childhood friendship between Luke and Biggs, the impact of his death is lost. That was until the Special Edition release when at least one of Biggs scenes was added back in. It's a scene that now comes right before the assault on the Death Star, inside the Rebel Base, and it features Luke and Biggs reuniting and reminiscing like old friends. It's a short scene, but it practically doubles Biggs' screen time and gives us a least some idea that he and Luke go way back, making his death yet another in a long string of tragedies Luke suffers throughout the trilogy.   

Ian McDiarmid's Palpatine, but using the original dialogue would've been better as Vader was already hunting Luke for destroying the Death Star

Cloud City’s enhanced scenery. The Empire Strikes Back has the least major changes of any of the original trilogy in the Special Edition. The Special Edition added enhancements and additional aerial shots. Expanded scenes and new backgrounds in Cloud City made the location lovelier and added depth. I can't picture Cloud City as it used to be.

Enhanced Lightsabers. For the original films the lightsaber effects were done with the actors holding white spinning three-sided rods covered with reflective material. Korean animator Nelson Shin drew saber effects onto the film. They also added the glowing effect and the colors were put onto the film by hand. It was a complex feat of engineering for its time but it left many problems behind. There are many scenes where you can see the white rods or the colors were wrong. Lucas went through and corrected the mistakes with the lightsaber using CGI.   

Boba Fett's voice change. Boba Fett was a fan-favorite for decades before he was revealed to actually be a clone. So when it came time for the original trilogy’s 2004 DVD release, it made sense for actor Temuera Morrison — who played Jango Fett and various clones in the prequels — to return to the franchise as the new voice of Boba Fett, the cloned version of his original character. Luckily, Morrison has a fitting voice, allowing the continuity fix to help rather than hinder the classic films.

Oola’s Death. It’s strange to consider when you watch it now, but in the original cut of Return of the Jedi Oola’s death scene was much more brief – she simply falls down the trap door into the Rancor pit in Jabba’s Palace, and the Rancor reveal is saved for later. Amazingly, the actress who played Oola filmed the extended death scene over a decade after first appearing in Jedi, with no difference to the visuals whatsoever. The Rancor isn’t revealed completely, meaning that the impact of its later appearance isn’t spoiled, but it does create a menacing scene showing more of the mercilessness of Jabba The Hutt  

Battle Of Yavin. Star Wars revolutionized film making and ushered in a new era of special effects. But some effects get outdated. And even though there is a magical charm to the practical in-camera effects that the original Star Wars trilogy were made with, digital and CGI effects would be become the modern norm. And when its used correctly, CGI can look amazing. Hence, the climactic ending space battle in A New Hope. Tossing away the bluescreen, matte film and super imposed ships and replacing them with digital X-Wings and Tie Fighters. This recreation of the attack on the Death Star and galactic dogfight finale is a thrilling piece of cinema. Seeing spacecraft flying and zooming in and out of impossible camera angles is just as dazzling as the original scene. Lucasfilm actually did the impossible, they took one of the most classic epic battles in movie history and actually made it better.

The Death Star Explosions. The explosions of the Death Star and Alderaan were one of the most striking changes in the Special Edition movies, enhanced with brighter colors and expanding rings of matter. But one of the most exciting things about the original Star Wars films is that the groundbreaking special effects were being invented as the films were made. The newly-formed Industrial Light and Magic spent years building models, inventing cameras to shoot them, and occasionally blowing them up. So when the Death Star is destroyed (both times), the explosions look and feel real, because they were created using footage from actual explosions.   

The victory celebration The change to the music at the end of Return of the Jedi is, in my opinion, one of the best decisions George Lucas ever made. The original song that played during the celebrations on Endor was ‘Yub Nub’, a nonsensical and comically puerile ditty that doesn’t do the finale justice, but the replacement, John Williams’ aptly-titled ‘Victory Celebration’, seems a much more fitting tune to end the original trilogy. For comparison, one needs only to look at the ending of A New Hope – the tune used there fits the tone and gravitas of the scene, and ‘Yub Nub’ simply does not.

The Worst

Darth Vader saying No in ROTJ. There was absolutely no need to have Darth Vader say “No” in this moment. We were looking at a still mask. Yet we could still sense his feelings and thoughts. He was clearly conflicted and you could tell he was about to do something. This is good film making. You can tell he is making the hardest decision of his life, choosing between his master and his son, the conflict was visible on his face. There was no need for Vader to say anything. Vader saying “No” lacks any sort of nuance and has him verbally stating those feelings. "NOOOOOOO". This scene was shot so perfectly that you could see Vader's internal struggle to do the right thing despite being unable to show any facial expressions. There was no need for a "nooooooo" to indicate what he's going to do, we know what he's going to do because of how the scene is shot. This takes away from the scene and it makes it so obvious that it takes the viewer out of the moment. The silence was a powerful moment.

Jabba’s appearance in A New Hope. I feel like the scene takes away the menace from Jabba The Hutt. The horrible CGI did not help either. The appearance is a complete downgrade from his appearance in ROTJ. And it really did not help that it’s a shot for shot of the same dialogue with the Han and Greedo scene. The added scene with Jabba was completely unnecessary. Han and Greedo’s  scene ALREADY showed us Han’s debt to Jabba. And really, Jabba is a powerful and influential figure in the galaxy. He is the boss. He uses Bounty Hunters as play things to do his bidding. He was capable of ensuring that Han could not be in a civilized star system without being hunted. Jabba is someone who feeds slave girls to his pet monster if they screw up a dance routine, but he's apparently okay with a deadbeat lowlife smuggler who owes him money stepping on his tail in front of all his men. Hell, Jabba would not care if Han fried Greedo, Tatooine is a hive of scum and villainy, Jabba can easily replace Greedo.   It took away the menace from Jabba. Not to mention, this change takes away some of the suspense people originally had about Jabba the Hutt. It just takes away some of the mystery of Jabba as a character. Jabba is the boss, he should not be doing grunt work and it just takes away the impact of seeing Jabba in ROTJ.

Greedo shoots first. Here’s why Han shooting first matters.  Greedo was hunting Han Solo and found him in Mos Eisley Cantina who wanted what Han owed Jabba, which Han didn’t have it with him just then, so Greedo ready to shoot Han, is then killed by Han. In the original theatrical version, Han shoots Greedo dead, but in all the film alterations, Greedo shoots first.  Lucas  wanted Han to be a good role model so he editied out but that was pointless because at that point already Han was still a smuggler out for himself. Lucas wanted kids to think he was a hero Except he’s SUPPOSED to be a cold blooded killer in the beginning. That was the whole POINT of his story arc. A selfish smuggler who is COMPLETELY fine with letting other people die if it meant his own survival and goes through an internal and external journey to not only give a damn about his fellow person but also grow as an individual to be a hero that is willing to risk his own safety for a much larger cause than himself. Him shooting last takes away the beginning part of a GREAT story arc and reduces it to “This bad ass is a bad ass. The end.”. Killer to hero is a much more interesting story than bad ass to still being a bad ass.

Pointless CGI in Mos Eisley. Mos Eisley was the home of scum and villainy and also the home for wayward CGI creatures that escaped their digital pens. The thought was more roaming creatures would add color and vivacity to the bustling desert town, but unfortunately, they looked like lost sideshow attractions. The CGI stuff in the background doesn’t blend in with the rest of the film and just draws attention away from the action in the foreground. It’s like an irritating five-year-old onscreen screaming, “Look at me look at me."

Editing the Jabba’s Palace Sequence. Jabba's palace was another opportunity to put a vast array of unique and interesting aliens on display, much like Mos Eisley's cantina. And also like the cantina, a gangster's hangout deserves a house band. In the original release that was the Max Rebo Band and the number they performed was "Lapti Nek." The original scene was short and feels like it belongs. This scene doesn't feel intrusive and out of place like the special edition, it feels like in Jabba's Palace there is a band playing some alien music. The added CGI was awful and became unwatchable. It detracts from the grit of the scene that’s created, in part by the aliens in the background, that in this case are actually portrayed by actors or puppeteers. It didn't need the whole new scene and terrible CGI dancing. To call the scene distracting would be an understatement. Visually, it's incongruous with the dingy, smoky atmosphere of Jabba's Palace, largely in part because of how badly the CGI aliens mesh with the real actors and sets. The new song also doesn't fit with the mood of the setting, it’s just tonally offensive and just kills the mood of Jabba The Hutt. Jabba’s Palace was so uncomfortable and full of dread. All we needed to see was a short music scene, Oola displeasing Jabba and Jabba sending Oola to the Rancor. That’s all you need to establish that everything about the palace is a nightmare and just adding the horrid abomination known as Jedi Rocks just killed it for me.

Replacing Sebastian Shaw with Anakin Skywalker. I understand the in-universe reasoning behind  changing Anakin’s Force Ghost to Hayden, but to me it is completely and utterly disrespectful to replace a now dead actor’s only appearance in Star Wars. It ALREADY made sense for Anakin to appear old. I love Hayden and I love the Prequels, but he should not have replaced Shaw as Anakin. It both contradicts Vader’s redemption and disrespected the memory of Sebastian Shaw. It’s not that they shot a whole new scene with Hayden, Hayden Christensen’s head was pasted on over Shaw’s body and that is really disrespectful to Sebastion Shaw since he passed away a few years before the special editions. The whole idea was that there was still some good left in the old man version of Anakin and that’s what we’re seeing here. It was the old Anakin who made the choice to save Luke so it makes more sense to have him as the Ghost. Luke wouldn’t even recognize the young Anakin which makes the change even more of a fail. Anakin appearing as he did in ROTS invalidates the fact that he was redeemed at all in the end. I mean, the first thing he does in that movie is behead Dooku, then immediately admit that it’s “not the Jedi way.” He then goes on to slay a ton of Jedi and then murder a bunch of little kids, before going to murder Nute Gunray/other Separatist leaders etc. That’s why it’s such a baffling decision to show Hayden at the end of ROTJ… it completely undermines the payoff of ROTJ: Vader still had good in him (like Luke said) even as an old man. Why would you turn back to the person who murdered children and betrayed everyone you loved? The entire point of the ending of Return of the Jedi was that after years of having been corrupted as Darth Vader, Luke’s adherence to the Jedi principles and refusal to strike down his father in anger is what causes Anakin to realize that he’s been consumed by the dark side. He then atones as best as he can by sacrificing himself to kill Palpatine and asks Luke to remove his mask in a final act symbolizing his freedom from Darth Vader. Anakin has mere minutes as a jedi before he succumbs to his wounds, but it’s extremely important to note that he died a jedi. This is why Luke gives him a traditional jedi funeral, and why he is able to apparate as a force ghost. This is why the movie is called Return Of The Jedi. This is what makes the ending scene significant. Anakin appears not as the intimidating figure of Lord Vader, but as a mild old Jedi knight, like he would have appeared if he had never been corrupted by the dark side. This is why Anakin as an old man works, it shows what the dark side can do to you, but it beautifully shows that Anakin can still find redemption and die as a Jedi and return to the light. He nods to Obi-Wan, who smiles at seeing his friend finally free of the Dark Side, and the film ends with them standing side by side as old friends once more. Having Anakin appear as he had looked when in his 30’s would discredit his sacrifice in the final scene. It would imply that the last time he was truly a jedi was when he was the young hotheaded general who saw the jedi code as a hindrance, and not a healed version of the wisened old man who finally understood the importance of peace. Additionally, it removes the symbolism of Anakin and Obi-Wan standing side by side as old friends once again. With Anakin appearing as an apprentice to Obi-Wan rather than an equal. And Luke recognizes him. He already saw the father behind the mask. Anakin appears as the wise old Jedi and father figure to Luke that he would and should have been have been and who he died as. Shaw is more aesthetically pleasing in that shot. Seeing him portrayed as Alec Guinness’ contemporary, as a father to Luke, he just looks like he belongs in the original shot. I grew up with the Original Trilogy on VHS, so seeing Sebastian Shaw as both the unmasked Anakin and the ghost of Anakin was wonderful to see, when both Anakin and Obi-Wan look at each other here, it seems they are finally at rest after decades of war thanks to Luke, Leia and the rest of the Rebels who believe in the Old Republic, when we got to the prequels, it all changed and did not make complete sense, I enjoy the prequels, but it did not work to change, there was ALREADY an in-universe explanation as to why Shaw works as Anakin’s Force Ghost. Shaw fitted a much better vision of Anakin, an Anakin who did not intend to fall but raised up when he realized his true self in his son. And finally he looks at his children with so much love in his eye which is really emotional. Anakin Skywalker is finally at peace with his old friends and looking on his children with so much happiness.

[roseisread]

My Year in Movies: Favorite Non-2018 Feature Films (Part 2)

Continuing the countdown of my favorite movies I saw for the first time in 2018 that were released in previous years... for part 1 of this list, click here.

39. Tokyo Drifter (1966, directed by Seijun Suzuki, country of origin: Japan)

Seijun Suzuki pulls together his favorite tropes from the Western, film noir, and Yakuza genres and throws a post modern, new wave sensibility on top complete with lots of neon and surrealism. The end result is one of the most stylistically bold movies I’ve ever encountered, and its influence extends to modern auteurs like Quentin Tarantino, Jim Jarmusch, and Nicolas Winding Refn. Tokyo Drifter (which has nothing to do with the Fast & Furious franchise as far as I know) follows a gangster on the run, but the plot really is secondary to the overall feel of the movie. Really fun and one I can imagine revisiting a lot just for its aesthetic choices and action set pieces. Rent it on Amazon Prime; in the meantime, here’s a pretty decent fan-made trailer.

38. Born to Kill (1947, directed by Robert Wise, country of origin: US)

Hollywood’s original bad boy Lawrence Tierney stars in this nasty little noir that fully lives up to its violent title. Sam Wilde (Tierney) is a gorgeous, amoral social climber who doesn’t let a little trifle like murder stand in the way of getting what he wants. Helen Brent (Claire Trevor) finds herself strangely drawn to him, even as she learns of his criminal leanings. There’s a particularly lustful scene between Sam and Helen that could be a direct influence on Natural Born Killers, actually. The fact that this picture was directed by Robert Wise, best known for his work on The Sound of Music and West Side Story, makes it all the more interesting--this pulpy film doesn’t have any musical numbers but it certainly is well-crafted and choreographed. If you love a good antihero, you owe it to yourself to watch this. Available for rent on Amazon, YouTube, and Vudu. 

37. Throw Momma From the Train (1987, directed by Danny DeVito, country of origin: US)

This comic riff on Strangers on a Train starts off with murder on its mind, but there’s a surprising sweetness lying just below the surface. I’m sure most people have already seen this film but in case you haven’t, you’re in for a hilarious and endearing story that showcases peak Billy Crystal and Danny DeVito. Anne Ramsey plays the titular “Momma,” and she was nominated for both the Oscars and the Golden Globes in this supporting role. There are lots of ways to watch this movie for free, including Amazon Prime, YouTube, Vudu, GooglePlay, and Showtime. 

36. Johnny Guitar (1954, directed by Nicholas Ray, country of origin: US)

The title refers to Sterling Hayden’s outlaw cowboy, but the real star of the show is Joan Crawford as Vienna: a saloon owning, jeans wearing, piano playing woman who takes on the whole town in a showdown. Portrayals of women in Westerns vary, but few emanate such power and self-assuredness as Vienna. 

Another woman, tellingly named Emma Small (played by Mercedes McCambridge), has set her sights on getting rid of Vienna and her establishment once and for all, and she will stop at no amount of violence or trickery to make it happen. So basically this is Mean Girls but in the Wild West. Offscreen, Joan Crawford was hooking up with director Nicholas Ray; and she’d previously been romantically involved with McCambridge’s now-husband. Both ladies also consumed a fair amount of booze while filming. This led to their rivalry bleeding into real life, and perhaps added to the tension we see on screen between the two. 

This movie didn’t have the warmest reception when it premiered stateside (Bosley Crowther on Crawford’s Vienna: “...as sexless as the lions on the public library steps and as sharp and romantically forbidding as a package of unwrapped razor blades.”) But European audiences devoured it, and it became beloved of people like Francois Truffaut who saw it as a major influence. You can watch it now on Hulu or rent from a number of streaming platforms. 

35. Sonatine (1993, directed by Takeshi “Beat” Kitano, country of origin: Japan)

Takeshi Kitano wrote, directed, and starred in this cult take on Yakuza films. In it, he plays Murakawa, a gangster who dispatches (often in creatively cruel ways) anyone his bosses happen to dislike. But he’s starting to grow weary of this way of life when he gets sent on a new assignment that has him mediating a dispute with a rival gang in Okinawa. He suspects that he may be the real target, but goes along with the order. While hiding out between confrontations, Murakawa and a batch of young recruits find ways to pass the time--shooting cans off each other’s heads, playing a roulette version of rock paper scissors, pretending to be sumo wrestlers, and more. 

There’s not a lot of dialogue here, and Kitano plays his character with a stoicism that Buster Keaton and Alain Delon no doubt influenced. But the poetry and emotion are all in the action (and inaction) on screen. Here is a man whose main accomplishments are surviving bloody shootouts and racking up the body count for his employer--no wonder he hallucinates about self-destruction and walks the beach in a daze. There’s actually a good bit of comedy here too, as the movie isn’t afraid to veer into cartoonish moments and satirize the very genre it portrays. I also have to specifically call out the action scenes, especially one near the end--completely memorable, unique, and gorgeously shot. Watch this via rental on Amazon, YouTube, and GooglePlay--especially if you’re a fan of movies like Drive, Kill Bill, or Le Samourai. 

34. Metropolitan (1990, directed by Whit Stillman, country of origin: US)

My first encounter with Whit Stillman came via 2016′s Love and Friendship, his adaptation of a Jane Austen story. When his debut film appeared on Filmstruck, I realized what a perfect fit Austen and Stillman really are. This movie follows a group of (mostly) wealthy teenagers in Manhattan, who attend debutante balls and gather at each other’s homes for long pretentious conversations and romantic sparring. If Austen were alive today, no doubt she would have written a novel in the same setting, filled with the same biting wit (no pun intended) that Stillman displays. If you like your movies with a lot of action and plot twists, this may not be your cup of tea; but if you enjoy the works of, say, Woody Allen/Noah Baumbach/Wes Anderson then you will definitely find this a subtle delight. No big names amongst the cast; and many of them only did one or two other projects after this, but I think that adds to the feeling of naïveté and naturalism. Random observation, but when I watched this movie I found connections between a number of its characters and the cast of The Breakfast Club--see if you agree. Right now you can rent this via iTunes, and since it takes place around Christmas and New Year’s, this would be a great time to watch. 

33. Radio Days (1987, directed by Woody Allen, country of origin: US)

This might be the sweetest, least cynical movie in Woody Allen’s filmography. It’s a love letter to the 1930s and 40s, when families would gather around the radio (rather than the TV) for music, serials, and news of the outside world. Seth Green plays the Woody stand-in as a child, Mia Farrow plays an aspiring radio actress, Larry David pops up as the Communist next door neighbor--it’s a real hoot. The music (from the likes of Benny Goodman, Artie Shaw, and Glenn Miller) is gorgeous and it’s fun to see old New York recreated for this film. Suitable for all ages and utterly delightful, you can watch it on Hulu with a subscription or rent it on Vudu for $2.99. 

32. Pickup (1951, directed by Hugo Haas, country of origin: US)

I caught up with this low-budget B-movie noir during Noir City Chicago, and fell head over heels for it. The director plays the lead character, a lovable but lonely railroad worker named Hunky (he does not live up to this name in appearance). When he encounters the gorgeous and sassy Betty (Beverly Michaels) at a carnival, he can’t believe a guy like him could hold the romantic interest of such a hottie. As luck would have it, though, she’s more attracted to his life savings than to him. What a golddigger. What sets this movie apart is the addition of a little plot twist: Hunky loses his hearing in an accident, which is just fine by the conniving Betty who can now scheme and talk trash around her husband. But when Hunky’s hearing unexpectedly returns, he doesn’t tell anyone and discovers that his beloved wifey is plotting his demise. Bonus: There’s a pretty adorable puppy in the mix. This isn’t available on DVD, sadly, but someone has uploaded it to YouTube and if you have 77 minutes to kill, I recommend checking it out.

31. Ghost (1990, directed by Jerry Zucker, country of origin: US)

Look, I love Demi Moore and Whoopi Goldberg and Patrick Swayze just as much as the next person, but for some reason I had always assumed that Ghost was this really cheesy paranormal romance. Wrong! It’s a charming murder mystery with some legit scary moments a lot of comedy, and, yes, some romance too. So if you have somehow missed this gem, you can catch up with it for 99 cents right now on Amazon or rent it for a Few Dollars More on other streaming sites.

30. One False Move (1992, directed by Carl Franklin, country of origin: US)

In part one of this list, I mentioned watching multiple Bill Paxton movies in 2018. This one features Paxton as a small town sheriff with illusions of grandeur--instead of settling small time domestic disputes, he’d love to one day solve murders and thwart serial killers and arrest drug kingpins in the big city. He gets his chance to do something bigger when a car full of murderous fugitives rolls into town. The LA detectives on the case don’t quite know what to make of Paxton; but he views them as heroes. When he gets his chance to show them what he’s made of, he doesn’t flinch. 

Billy Bob Thornton co-wrote the screenplay and co-stars in the film, another connection between this and the other Paxton entry on my list (A Simple Plan). Here, he’s a vile and brutal sociopath (a role he’d go on to play in the TV adaptation of Fargo), with a girlfriend named Fantasia (Cynda Williams) that might be having second thoughts about their relationship. Director Carl Franklin is perhaps better known for the Denzel Washington neo noir Devil in a Blue Dress; and Franklin himself introduced a double feature of these two films at Noir City Chicago. He’s a brilliant, economical director with a deep well of classical film knowledge and a knack for capturing defining character traits in the space of a few frames. Rent this movie on Amazon, Vudu, or YouTube and prepare for a gritty, moving ride. 

29. Peeping Tom (1960, directed by Michael Powell, country of origin: England)

I caught up with this out of print masterpiece (purchased at my local library sale for 50 cents on Criterion DVD!) during my October horror viewing, and immediately wanted it to find a wider audience. Reviled upon its initial release, it follows a talented but troubled young filmmaker whose obsession involves recording the final moments of his murder victims’ lives, as they realize their fate. Pretty twisted, I know. The exploration of voyeurism and the relationship between the camera, its subjects, and an audience really make this a fascinating watch, both from a technical perspective and as a critique of moviemaking and consumption. One can’t help but see the influence this movie has had on horror filmmakers from Wes Craven to John Carpenter, particularly in the way it forces us to identify with the psychologically damaged killer instead of centering the narrative on his victims. Massively underrated, and deserving of your attention if you consider yourself a fan of horror movies. Watch it via rental on a number of streaming platforms. 

That concludes part 2 of the list! Stay tuned for the next segment, coming soon! 

[aion-rsa]

Star Trek: Picard — Ranking Season 1’s Deleted Scenes

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This Star Trek: Picard article contains some spoilers for Season 1.

As Star Trek: Lower Decks finally debuts internationally on Amazon Prime, Star Trek: Picard Season 1 arrives on DVD and Blu-ray for the first time in the U.K. Although the Blu-ray snuck in a U.S. release back in October, it’s safe to say that Trekkies may have been pretty distracted by world-events (and Discovery Season 3!) at the time, and may not have delved-into all the extra Picard goodies! So, if you’re a U.S. reader and you missed the news about the Picard deleted scenes the first time around, or if you’re in the U.K. and you’re just now getting your hands on the Picard Season 1 Blu-ray, here’s what to know about the various deleted scenes.

First up, before getting into the weeds of the Picard Season 1 deleted scene ranking, it’s important to note that the special features on the Blu-ray are pretty cool, and not the same behind-the-scenes features that were posted on StarTrek.com or featured on The Ready Room. Essentially, if you’re looking for all those Wil Wheaton interviews with the cast and crew that happened while Picard was airing, those are not the Blu-ray. Instead, there totally different behind-the-scenes features, including full-episode video commentary for Episode 1, “Remembrance,” which features series creators Akiva Goldsman, Alex Kurtzman, Kirsten Beyer, Michael Chabon, as well as the director of the first three Picard episodes, Hanelle Culpepper.

So, this is all to say that the Picard Blu-ray is much more than just some random deleted scenes. There’s some super in-depth commentary on each episode (“The Mission Logs,”) and some great mini-documentaries, too. 

BUT. What were the scenes we didn’t see? Turns out there weren’t a ton of deleted scenes from Star Trek: Picard Season 1, which could indicate that what we saw on screen was pretty close to what was intended all along. Here’s a brief ranking of the deleted scenes on the Picard Season 1 Blu-ray…

4. “Broken Pieces” xBs and more Ramdha

In the episode “Broken Pieces,” we get two deleted scenes, but both are so short that it feels right to list them as one entry. This was Episode 8 of Picard, so at this point, there’s chaos on the Artifact, and these deleted scenes show how that chaos impacted a few characters everyone kind of forgot about. 

For example, remember Soji’s researcher friend; Naáshala Kunamadéstifee (Chelsea Harris)? Well, in one deleted scene from this episode, we see her running around the chaotic Artifact, only to encounter an xB, who appears to say “we are Borg.” In another deleted scene, we see Ramdha (Rebecca Wisocky) awaken, and sort of take-in the fact that the xBs seem to be rising-up against the Romulans.

3. “Et in Arcadia Ego, Part 1”: Altan Soong plots with Sutra 

In one cool deleted scene from the penultimate episode of Picard Season 1, we get to actually see Sutra and Altan walk through their plan to basically screw everyone over. In this scene, Altan tells Sutra that he’s okay with dying if the humans leave them “no choice.” He likens himself and organics to “the dinosaurs” dying out. But, this deleted scene also hints at Soong’s extra robot body, the android Golem that ends-up being the method for Picard’s rebirth.

2. Et in Arcadia Ego, Part 2”: Extended “Blue Skies” Scene

In the final scenes of the last episode of Picard Season 1, after Data’s real “death,” there was a montage kind of telling us where everyone was ending-up. But, one thing cut from that scene was what happened to Narek and Narissa’s auth, Ramdha. Yep, it’s Ramdha again, your favorite Romulan xB! Well, in this deleted scene, we see that Ramdha is staying to live with the various Synths, which seems to imply that the xBs will integrate with the Synth population.

This could be a big deal for future seasons of Picard, or Trek in general. Like, what will happen to that Synth population now that a bunch of former Borg are living there, too?

Read more

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Star Trek: Picard Finale Death & Golem Explained

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Star Trek: Picard Episode 10 Easter Eggs and References

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1. “Remembrance”: Picard uses his cane telescope and yells a lot

Without a doubt, the longest and most interesting deleted scene in all of Picard Season 1 is from the very first episode, “Remembrance.” In this (fairly long!) deleted scene, we get to see Jean-Luc walking around Chateau Picard, kind of surveying what’s going on. We also get to see him use his walking stick which is — wait for it — a secret telescope! Jean-Luc goes full Lemony Snicket and spies on some of the workers in his vineyard, a few of which are kind of making fun of him behind his back. Jean-Luc spots it, and threatens to “sack” one of the vineyard workers if he sees this behavior again.

It’s a weird and awesome scene, but you really have to wonder, what happens when somebody is fired on a planet with no money? Like, how does that work? Either way, this scene gives us more of Laris (Orla Brady) giving people Romulan side-eye, which alone, is worth the price of the entire Blu-ray. Obviously, the hope is that somewhere, there are enough deleted scenes we didn’t see to create an entire Larsis and Zahban miniseries. But, if there aren’t, lets just hope they’re back for Season 2.

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Picard Season 1 is now available on Blu-ray, DVD and Digital Download & Keep for UK fans.

The post Star Trek: Picard — Ranking Season 1’s Deleted Scenes appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[vrahno]

Most dubs in my country are rubbish, cartoon dubs especially, and that goes for the four Bionicle movies too. I went through them to see how many translation screw-ups I can find, just to share my (and probably other Hungarian fans’) long-held frustration with an international audience. You may need a few years to spare cause it’s a lengthy list.

Mask of Light

The title, ”A fényálarc” (The light-mask) is already iffy, as in the movie the artifact is called “a fény maszkja” (the mask of light). They also had some trouble with character titles like Toa or Turaga -- in this language, titles usually come after a person’s name, but the dub kept the English word order. Interestingly, the local release of the books (written by one of the movies’ translators) did mostly pay attention to this.

Unity, Duty and Destiny are correctly rendered as Egység, Kötelesség, Végzet, yet in the sequels and the books, they become Egység, Felelősség, Kötelesség (Unity, Responsibility, Duty). As a side-note, the G2 webisode dubs went back to the original translation.

Not technically a translation issue, but Pewku’s name is always pronounced as “Pevku”.

For specific examples in the dialogue, I’ll quote the original lines first, then translate the dub’s lines back into English as accurately as possible, with their errors intact.

Hold your Rahi, I'm coming! Hold the Rahi, I’m going! - “Hold your horses” is not a meaningful expression here, but they kept it in the dub despite there being other animal-related idioms they could have used.

Your own Captain of the Guard... The new Bodyguard Captain... New?

Must I unleash those who should never see the light of day? Must I unleash those who must never see light? - Another expression taken literally.

Their unity can be poisoned, their duty will be broken, and their destiny I must shatter. Their unity I can poison, their duty I can break, and their destiny I can prevent. - Terry’s talking about the Rahkshi powers here, so the last should have been kept as “shatter”.

Shadows that cower in the depths. Exactly as foretold. The shadows cover the depths, just as the prophecy said. - Mishearings and mondegreens are a staple of this translator couple’s work (yes, there were two people working on this shit). Did they even have the original script?

“But you wander off every chance you get looking for stories. What about your story?” “I don't have a story.” “Only 'cause you won't stand still long enough to make one.” “But if you have the chance, you wander off looking for stories. What kind of story do you long for?” “I’m not longing for a story.” “Only because you can’s stay in one place for long enough.” - So Takua’s looking for stories, but he’s not, because he’s too busy looking for stories?

“Keep 'em busy. I'm…” “Running away and leaving me!” "Keep him busy. And I’ll...” “I’d rather run away.” - Maybe not a mistake, there’s room for artistic freedom after all (and I think Takua’s line is kinda funny), but given the other examples, it’s just as likely they simply misheard the line.

Lewa in this dub doesn’t use treespeak. Instead... Word is deep-wood that you seek the Seventh Toa. The world is a deep forest if one’s seeking the Seventh Toa.

If Toa Lewa helped on your search, might he be a... spirit-lift? Say, if Toa Lewa helps you search, will he also become an... elevated spirit? - I know he’s kind of an Indian-hippy mix in this movie, but the fuck is that supposed to mean? He’s only asking if his company would lift Jaller and Taku’s spirit, as in cheer them up.

Er, I've been a second! But, er, I've never flown one myself. Um, I’ve seen such a thing, but I’ve never flown on one. - MNOG is not canon in the dub. (Or perhaps Takua means the Gukko he rode didn’t look like the movie design?)

Your village has fallen to… Rahkshi! The Makuta's sons. Your town has recently been... attacked! By Makuta’s sons. - So how do T&J know what a Rahkshi is if they don’t hear the name?

Frozen? What could do this to them? They’re frozen, how could they harm us? - This is another habit this translator couple has, reordering the original words and inserting some new ones to get a different meaning out of them. At least in this case, the line still fit the situation.

Takua’s grumpy “Tunnels.” line is missing.

Makuta originally says “They will not disturb you.” to Mata Nui, but the dub reinterpreted the line to refer to the three new Rahkshi. Some other dubs also did this.

Do you think the Turaga were right about us? What do you think, was Turaga right? - “Turaga” is not the name of a single character.

But, united, our power defeated the Rahkshi! But if we unite, we will defeat the Rahkshi! - Beyond mixing up plural and singular words, these translators also have a hard time interpreting past, present and future tenses.

I have but one destiny. Yours lie with the Matoran and the Turaga. We don’t share our destiny. Yours is tied to Matoran and Turaga. - The intended meaning is somewhat there, but sounds hella awkward.

Summon the Matoran! Conjure up the Matoran! or Subpoena the Matoran! - Yes, “summon” can mean those too, but the relevant meaning here is “gather”.

My duty is to the Mask of Shadows! My doom is the Mask of Shadow! - Eh. Both lines sound random, but I guess they sort of make sense if you consider Makuta’s originally intended characterization as a well-meaning guy who has been corrupted by his mask. To be fair, the ending scene of the movie is a mess even in English, so whatever. But it’s still not a correct translation

The city of the Great Spirit, my island home, refound. The city of the Great Spirit, my island home, has recovered. - I think the translators didn’t get Vakama was talking about Metru Nui here. Seems they thought he was referring to the villages on Mata Nui being rebuilt.

Legends of Metru Nui

The translated title has “legend” in singular. Not a big deal. What is a bigger deal is that titles like Toa and Turaga are now correctly placed after the character names... but they went overboard with it, as even the Toa Suva becomes “Suva Toa”, which makes no sense. It’s not a Toa named Suva, it’s a shrine dedicated to the Toa.

Pronunciation-wise, Dume is not only spoken aloud as “Duma”, he’s even called that in the subtitles. Nuju became “Nuyu”.

Prove yourselves worthy Toa. Prove that you are worthy for the Toa. - Again, it makes some sense but sounds awkward like that. Why not “for the title of Toa”?

Mask maker, you saw Toa Lhikan last, right? Mask pourer, you saw Lhikan Toa last, right? - But Vakama carves masks, he doesn’t pour them into molds.

... we sought out, found and recovered these Great Disks. ... to find and discover the Great Disks. - Great redundancy.

Cross the sea of protodermis, and be honored as Toa. Cross the protodermis, so we may greet you as Toa. - Since the word “sea” is missing here, Makuta’s callback at the end loses some of its context.

“Do you thing they went this way?” “Why do I bother?” “Ah, do you think they went this way?” “What does it matter?” - A joke died here. Nidhiki’s supposed to be lamenting Krekka’s stupidity (the Toa hopped into a one-way transport chute, so they couldn’t have gone any other way), not responding to him with a nonsensical answer.

Matau’s “Check out these wings.” line becomes plural in the dub, even though he’s only talking to Nokama.

“Stock boy” is translated as “numbskull” (I guess Onewa would say such a thing, but it’s still incorrect) and “record keeper” as “record holder”. The word “record” of course refers to “records of the past”, what with Whenua being an archivist, not “record achievement”, which is what the translators thought.

Look beyond your history, and see what is. Look beyond your past, and see what it is. - The exact opposite of what Lhikan meant.

You (singular) shall help both your brothers (plural). You both (plural) shall help your brother (singular). - Onewa is a single person and there’s two of his brothers there, you fucking shits.

I believe it is time to depart. I think it is time to split up. - But they don’t split up. They just leave the cell. He said “depart”, not “part”. This is another line multiple dubs misinterpreted.

"Follow me!” (in singular, since Krekka’s talking to Nidhiki only) “Hmm. No. Get down!” “Follow me!” (plural) “Hmm. Fools!” - The fuck happened here? Why are both Krekka and Nidhiki suddenly multiple persons each?

It's amazing what you can learn when you're not always speak-teaching. It’s amazing how much you can learn when you’re not being taught. - Nokama’s a teacher. She is the one doing the teaching, not the one being taught. Again the line completely changed its meaning.

Maybe he sneak-passed! Maybe he snake-sneaked! - Can’t decide if it’s “snake” or “sneak”, so just go with both?

“Hey, Nokama, I see us taking a romantic ride-drive.” “And you believe Vakama has odd visions!” “You, Nokama, do you feel-see what a romantic journey we’re on?” “And do you still think that Vakama’s visions are weird?” - Another joke lost. Matau’s fantasizing about a future ride that only he sees. Not only that, Nokama’s retort is worded wrong, as the emphasis is placed on “do you still think” instead of Vakama’s visions.

As mentioned, Dume doesn’t say “sea of protodermis”, so Makuta’s callback becomes the following: Perish in the real sea of protodermis. Die in the protodermis’ really-big sea!

Without the Mask of Time, it will take a lifetime's journey to find both our destinies! Without the Mask of Time, both of us can spend a lifetime searching for our lost destinies! - But their destinies aren’t lost. It will just take a long time to find them.

In MoL, the line “This is they way of the Bionicle” was translated as “This is the rule of Bionicle”. Here, it becomes “This is the law of Bionicle”. The third movie will have a third variation because another thing this translator couple hates is consistency.

Web of Shadows

The title on the DVD cover, “Árnyak hálója” (Web of Shadows) differs from the one they actually use in the movie, “Árnyak hálójában” (In the Web of Shadows). That’s a warning sign right there.

I gotta say this is one of the worst dubs of anything I’ve ever heard. Sure, there are dubs that are far worse on a technical level, and this one at least has passable casting and the dialogue mostly matches up to when the mouths are moving (or flashing). But there’s a thick aura of uneasiness, the line delivery sounds awfully stilted and forced throughout, and you can tell none of the people involved wanted to be anywhere near the recording booth. The translation is an even bigger mess than ever, and the VAs under and overact at all the wrong spots. There’s a few moments where the dub actually sounds great, but as a whole it’s a cringeworthy experience. I guess they were really fed up with these movies by this point.

Titles are again arranged in the English word order. As for pronunciations, Sidorak is for some reason called “Sidoraak” and Keetongu becomes “Keeetongooo”. And as if to make up for ditching Lewa’s treespeak in MoL, Matau’s chutespeak is cranked up to eleven, to the point where he ends up sounding like a fucking Gungan.

The Toa united in a dutiful pledge. They made a pledge to the Toa Metru vow of obedience. - The what? It’s also of note that the dub actually calls them Toa Metru, which never comes up in the original. In fact there’s lines not only in this dub but other as well that can’t be heard in the English version, so I wonder if the translations were based on some preliminary script.

“Well, that stunk.” “It would appear there was an error in our transport. Pilot error.” “Wow, this is smelly.” “It seems that an error has slipped into our transportation. A grave error.” - Fuck you.

Well, there goes the old neighborhood! That there is an old acquaintance! - Another expression interpreted too literally.

The Onu-Metru Archive houses a specimen of every Rahi beast ever discovered. At least… it used to. The Onu-Metru Container is chock full of the widest varieties of Rahi monsters. At least... the discovered ones. - Yet again they remove the main point of a sentence.

We go to the Coliseum, we rescue the Matoran, we leave. We go into the hall, finish our work, leave. - They said Coliseum in LoMN, so why not here?

I assume your telling me this without twitching uncontrollably means the Toa have already been captured. I assume when you talk about this event you have already trapped the Toa. - Leaving out chunks of sentences that can be tricky to translate is another forte of this couple.

“Well, fire-spitter, we can't say you didn't show us the city. 'Course, we can say that you got us captured, poisoned, and, seeing as I don't think we've been brought up here for the view, imminently smash-dashed.” Onewa barely audibly muffles „not Vakama's fault”. “He agrees!” “We can’t complain-say you didn’t show us the city. And perhaps nor that it’s your fault we got catch-caught, poisoned, and because we haven’t been brought here for the view, it’s your fault we die." “Baloney.” (clearly audible) “I agree!” - I agree too, but this is more than baloney, this is bullshit. How did “of course we can say” become “perhaps nor can we say”? Well, at least they got “we” and “say” right.

When Vakama starts mutating, the dub has the others react with: Whenua: “Hey, ho, ho, be careful already!” Matau: “Wow, that’s so dangerous!” Ruining what was meant to be a serious, disturbing scene.

Even now their broken bodies are being brought to me. And their broken bodies have been brought here to me. - “Even now” and “are being” are not past tense.

What do you say, mask smelter? What do you say, mask pourer? - Again with this pouring. Maybe they misheard “smelt” and thought it was “melt”?

Unity, duty, destiny. It starts with unity. Unity, responsibility, duty. Starting with duty. - Reminder that two translators got credited for this.

I'm sure it could have helped our old Toa selves, but… now? It obviously helps us reacquire our Toa selves, but...now? - The meaning is yet again changed to complete nonsense. So the Temple helps them change back, but it doesn’t because they’d have to change back for that first? And why is “it could have helped” translated as “it obviously can help”?

“You're not worried they're going to tell him you said that?” “They are loyal to me.” ”Right. Like you are to Sidorak!” “… Yes.” “Aren’t you afraid these are going to tell him what we’re talking about?” “They are loyal to me.” “Of course. Like you are to Sidorak!” “... No.” - The subtitles actually do say “yes”. So watching the dub with those turned on is an experience onto itself.

“I wonder what's taking the Rahaga so long, I mean how hard is it to get directions?” “Well, when they're to a creature that has not been seen since the time before time… hard.” “How hard can it be for Rahaga to discover-find the direction?” “As in the case of creatures that hasn’t been seen since before the beginning of time... hard.” - This doesn’t even make grammatical sense. However, maybe I’ve misheard a particular word (amit - amik), so just in case, here’s a different interpretation: “As in the case of creatures that haven’t seen since before the beginning of time... hard.” - Does this make more sense perhaps? It’s grammatically more correct, but it suggests that these supposed “creatures” are blind. In either case, the sentence is totally wrong, since the word “creature” in the original line is singular, not plural. Unless they meant that there’s more than one Keetongu, which is just as wrong. Or maybe they meant the Rahaga? That’s even more wrong.

Because of you, the Rahaga will be put where they belong: in a cage. Thanks to you, the Rahaga have been put where they belong: behind bars. - On one hand, I applaud the translators for taking advantage of Sidorak’s extra lip movements and fitting the words to them. On the other, the line still isn’t accurate.

What I applaud them even less for is their wrecking of Matau’s speech to Vakama at the end. In the original, the writers wisely held back his chutespeak to make the speech that much more convincing and serious. But in the dub, they stuff it full of these stupid made-up words that just make it laughable. I won’t attempt to type them all here. Just imagine it’s Jar Jar in Matau’s place or something.

Still, there are yet more things wrong with that scene. In English, Matau brings up the three virtues woven into his speech in succession, reminding Vakama of his life as a Toa. In the dub, both duty and destiny are translated as duty, meaning there’s only two virtues. Also, there’s this: You're our leader, Vakama. You're my leader. You’re our direction-leader, Vakama. Our leader.

Not strictly an error, but throughout the film, the terms “defeat”, “strike down” and “destined to fail” are all translated as “destroy”. Also, “elemental powers” never come up. Instead, they’re “special powers”.

In light of all you've given, you owe us nothing. Despite that I know you’ve given so much, you owe us nothing. - Again they turn part of the line completely around. Keetongu owes them nothing because he’s done so much, not in spite of it.

He wants to know why you'd want that. Seeing as you've made peace with the beast within. He wants to know why you wish that. Have you made peace with the beasts within you? - And yet again. The second sentence is not a question, it’s a statement.

The Makuta! He is gone. Makuta! He’s gone from here. - As usual, the wrong part of the sentence is given emphasis. The point is that he truly has escaped, like Norik claimed. Not that he’s gone “from this specific place”.

As for this line, the delivery is just as bad as the translation. I’ll attempt to convey it through writing: We'll find a way to defeat him. Because that's what Toa do. We find a method to defeat him! That’sthee... Toowah’s... faith. - And no, they didn’t choose the Hungarian word for “faith” because it fit better to Vakama’s mouth movements. Translating the line literally (”Mert ez a Toa dolga”, instead of “Ez a Toa hite”) would, on the other hand, have perfectly fit. But they didn’t. So they got both the translation and the lip sync wrong, and as a result the delivery is shit too because the VA had to make these silly pauses and needlessly extend the words where necessary.

“This is the way of the Bionicle” is rendered here as “This is the way of life in the world of Bionicle.”

So the couple who localized these movies are actually some of the most prolific translators working in the country’s industry, with decades of experience and thousands of scripts, books and comics to their name. Yet their grasp on both the English and Hungarian languages just keeps deteriorating further, and to this day they continue to wreck every almost dub they touch. I’m gonna stop fucking around and name them: László Katona and Zita Csányi. The former also translated the few Bionicle books we got in this country, and while they have plenty of issues, the translation is much more competent. Most people mainly have a beef with Csányi, whose dubbing scripts for animated productions are consistently some of the worst in the industry, and she’s especially infamous for the wretched translation work she submitted for the Ben 10 and Steven Universe franchises. I’m a fan of neither, but as a mere casual cartoon watcher, I’m appalled by the sheer stilted-sounding nonsense I keep hearing whenever I come across any of those shows on tv. Mishearings, taking foreign idioms literally, constantly confusing past-present-future and singular-plural, or just straight-up rewriting the dialogue into something completely detached for their original meaning.

But moving on to everyone’s favorite Bionicle movie (note: this sentence was translated by Zita Csányi)...

The Legend Reborn

Now, at the time Lego’s Hungarian website advertised this as “A legenda újjáéled”, until the web team got notified that the DVD is actually called “A legenda újjászületik”. A red flag already. The dub was produced by a different company and a different translator who was somehow just as bad. With this film, they didn’t even try to sync the dialogue to the mouth movements, so that’s the level of quality we’re dealing with here.

You never hear the word Glatorian in the dub. They’re just called gladiators, which gives me vibes of all the European DBZ dubs that avoided saying the word Saiyan at all costs. Also, the Skopio is merely a scorpion. Yet they kept everything else. The Great Beings are inconsistently called “Giant Beings” or just “Giants”. I take it the translator thought the Great Spirit Robots were supposed to be GBs? Not that the movie makes it clear.

Its name echoed my rebirth – the Mask of Life. My rebirth can thus be summarized as such: the life born from the mask. - That’s one way to overwrite a simple sentence.

You just won me a lot of bets. You won me heaps of money. - Bets in this case referred to Kiina’s conviction that there’s life on other planets. Maybe there was money involved (does Bara Magna even have currency?), but the translator probably just thought Kiina made a bet on Mata Nui’s arena fight. Which would make little sense as he wasn’t even scheduled to fight.

The Glatorian are headed for Tajun. The gladiator is headed for Tajun. - Ah, good ol’ singular-plural confusion.

Those Bone Hunters are gonna be eating Skopio belly for weeks. The scorpion’s stomach is gonna be digesting Bone Hunters for weeks. - This is the fucking opposite.

Not an error, I just think it’s amusing that instead of calling him a “filthy thief”, Kiina calls Berix a “goddamn thief”. I call him worse.

I like fixing things, and I'm good at it, too. I mean, c'mon, who do you think got the lights working, huh? I like tinkering with things, and I’m pretty good at it. Who’d have thought the lights here work? - Maybe it’s just me, but this doesn’t give me the impression that he was the one who patched them up.

Wait, what you did with the Vorox tail and Click, could it work with these? Wait, what have you done Click and with the Vorox tail, could you do it with this? - Did this translator speak either of the two languages required for his job, I ask?

Of course! Fire is your elemental power. The Mask of Life has simply ignited it. Of course! Fire is your elementary element. The Mask of Life simply recognized this fact. - This just sounds stupid.

Guess it's a stand-off. I think this is a dead-end. - I guess technically. But there’s more suitable expressions he could have used.

I told you, Raanu, pitting Vastus against Tarix would pack 'em in! I told you, Raanu, it’s a mistake to pit Vastus against Tarix. - That means the opposite you dumb fuck.

I saw them being dragged away. Through the hot springs. I saw that they dragged them away to the hot springs.

Did you ever think maybe you weren't the only one that needed to believe there was something more? Did you ever think that you were the only one who wanted to see more with it? -Huh? With what?

I am closer to becoming the warrior I must be if I am to reclaim my empire and free my people. If I reclaim my empire and save my people, I will become the warrior I wanted to be. - No. He has to become a warrior because he wants to save them. It’s not that he has to save them because he wants to become a warrior, you mongrel piece of fuck translator. To be fair to him, TLR sucks. Technically, the others do too but the dubs suck more.

If anyone’s wondering, or I should say if anyone even made it to this part of the post, there’s only one major translation goof I recall from the 2015 webisode dub: they called Skull Basher Skull Grinder. Oh, and the introduction episode just plain wasn’t dubbed at all, if you count that as a goof. The Journey to One wasn’t dubbed or subbed either cause Netflix’s online content still hasn’t been localized here.

[howaminotinthestrokesyet]

90’s Rap: Random Quarantine Thoughts

1. Vanilla Ice...I remember he was absolutely killed in the media when he tried to say that he wasn’t using the sample from Queen and David Bowie, “Under Pressure.” I have no idea why he tried to lie about it in the first place. Every rapper back then was using samples of previous songs. This was before rock, pop, and every other artist got wise to the fact that they should be making money from these rappers using their samples. Take a look at “U Can’t Touch This” by MC Hammer, which uses a Rick James sample. I mean Paul’s Boutique by the Beastie Boys came out right around the same time as well. That album was essentially the equivalent of a Girl Talk mashup album. One of the members of the Beastie Boys has even said that album could never be done today because it would cost $1 billion. Vanilla Ice should have told the truth in the first place, then perhaps people would not be looked upon as such a moron. The irony is that such honesty would have helped when he did that stupid Amish reality show.

2. Coolio... His career goes to show you the power of simply having a couple of hit songs. I have noticed that he continues to tour almost 25 years after “Fantastic Voyage” and “Gangster’s Paradise.” People are still paying money to see him and venues are still booking him, even though he only has one strand of hair remaining on his head.

3. MC Hammer...I was watching the video for “U Can’t Touch This” when a lightning bolt of an idea hit me that is pure genius. Hospitals should do away with the gown. Everyone hates them as they feel a huge dread of embarrassment when they have to put one on. What do we replace the gown with? MC Hammer jackets and MC Hammer pants because they will allow enough room to do anything with tubes, IV’s, needles. This is a gold mine that I need to look into after this pandemic calms down.

4. Puff Daddy... There are so many things that I could talk about when it comes to Puff Daddy. I could go on and on about the fact that people appear in his videos that really do not need to be there. Case in point, take a look at Biggie Smalls in the “Can’t Nobody Hold Me Down” video. He does not rap, but instead argues with a cop in various portions of the video. His presence really does not serve any purpose. Yet, that goes along with my primary point...What the hell is going on in his videos? Take “Can’t Nobody Hold Me Down.” There are so many damn things going on in this video that make no sense whatsoever. Why are they in the desert, why does their car blow up, are these concerts that they are rapping at, where are they going, did they ever meet up with Biggie, and so on.

5. 2Pac...One of the things that completely blows my mind in the annals of 90’s rap is the fact that 2Pac Shakur was a member of Digital Underground. I would have loved to be a fly on the wall when they were recording the “Humpty Dance.” I may have to research his feelings about that song as it went completely main stream. As I watch him in some videos, it becomes twilight zone surreal just to see him walking next to Humpty. I am not sure if he ever talked about that in an interview, but I sure would like to find out.

6. “Regulate...” Something people either do not know or tend to forget about in this song,but it was recorded for the movie Above the Rim starring 2Pac. That is why in the music video you see scenes that perhaps one is not familiar with. I have actually seen the movie which is a cult classic now simply because 2Pac was in it. The film is pretty terrible, and probably should have gone straight to DVD upon its release. I am not sure if this has happened too much, but the hit song was 100 times more popular than the movie. Unfortunately, not even the song could save a film about a troubled janitor who used to be a basketball phenom.

7. Naughty By Nature... There are two things that I will always remember about this group. The first is their hit song “OPP,” which whenever I hear it I am immediately transported back to my freshman year of high school. Certain songs bring up certain times in your life. The other thing that I think of whenever I see or hear this group is that long ass knife Treach had in the videos. What was the deal with that knife? In later videos, they always made a point to include at least one shot of him holding that absurd knife. I wonder if he is going to be buried with that knife. There probably is a story behind it, but I am not sure I want to know that particular story. You do not want to get the reputation of actually knowing why Treach from Naughty By Nature has a knife.

8. West Coast Rap All Stars... This was an all star track comprising of West Coast rappers in an effort to raise awareness about gang violence. I think this was a reaction to the East Coast song that did the same thing with artists like Queen Latifah, “Self-Destruction.” I remember owning this cassette single when I was younger. The hook in this song is very catchy, which is probably the reason why I liked this song so much. Yet, this song also brings out a surreal feeling when listening to it or watching the music video years later. Surreal in the fact that so many diverse rappers are in this song. I always found it strange to see Eazy-E, Dr. Dre, MC Ren walking along side MC Hammer and Humpty from Digital Underground. I think Young MC is even in this video at some point. You would expect the Compton rappers to be in this video, but even as a kid, I was surprised to see those rappers that end up on Pepsi commercials like Hammer to be there. The other strange thing about this song and music video was a couple of other things. First, Humpty actually goes into his character within the song. I guess that illustrates just how big that guy was back in the early 90’s. The other thing was MC Hammer took about five seconds to do some sort of ridiculous dance because that is what he was identified as with the public.

9. NWA... One of the more underrated rap albums of the 90’s was 100 Miles and Running from NWA. This EP was better than the full length album that followed it a year later. This might be because Dre knew that it was only going to be a preview of the forthcoming album, so it had to be leaner than normal. The full length album is iconic and well done, but it is just a little bloated, especially with all of the commercials and sketches.

10. LL Cool J... I saw LL last year at Lallapalooza. I did not know what to expect thinking I would probably have a good laugh if nothing else. In fact, Todd turned out to be quite good. I think people tend to forget how many really good songs that he had over the years. His performance was excellent because I went in thinking that he might struggle possibly remembering some of the lyrics. Yet, then again, the dude has been an actor for about 20 years. Near the end of the show, I made a comment to one of the security guys there. “I bet f’ing Chris O’Donnell could not do that.” He laughed, which gave me the assurance that he had seen NCIS LA.

[daleisgreat]

Jay and Silent Bob Reboot

The time has come to put a bookend to keeping up with Kevin Smith with today’s entry focusing on his latest film, 2019’s Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (trailer). Before we get there, I feel obligated to say I was a huge fan of his first half of his career, primarily of his old ‘View Askew-niverse’ days when he first started off with affable stoner characters, Jay & Silent Bob being carryover characters in his first several films. I think I saw Clerks and Mallrats at least five times each and feel safe in saying those two would stand the test of time, especially Clerks. I dug Chasing Amy, Dogma and Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back when they originally released in my teenager days, but cannot help but think I outgrew Smith’s style of verbiage and humor he honed in on by that point, and have a feeling I would cringe at going back to them. I think I would like Zack & Miri and Clerks 2 more if some certain scenes got nixed. I thought Jersey Girl and Copout were not among his best, but both solid studio comedies and a nice way to mix it up from his regular output at the time. Red State felt like a hard left turn for Smith, and some parts I detested, but it kind of came together towards the end. Tusk however was absolute dreck and upon hearing how his follow up Yoga Hosers was an all-in spinoff of Tusk caused me to avoid Yoga Hosers at all costs and casually back away from the Kevin Smith fandom. This brings us to Jay and Silent Bob Reboot. The sequel/reboot to 2001’s Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back. 18 year-old Dale, eagerly anticipated Strike Back, rushed out to see it opening weekend and poured through the DVD in multiple viewings of it and all its extras in the weeks after it hit home video. 37 year-old Dale however ignored Reboot during Smith’s nationwide tour where the only way to see it for several months was when Smith was touring it to boutique arthouse theaters and doing a Q&A afterwards for around $50-80. I only reluctantly picked up Reboot a few weeks after it hit video when I noticed it was on sale for half off and thought for that price I could get my fill out of it with some expected callbacks and cameos that were a big standout in Strike Back and I hope would save Reboot….and that is essentially what happened.

Reboot kicks off with Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Kevin Smith) up to their old shenanigans loitering outside the Quick Stop, until they are promptly arrested, but saved in court thanks in part to their attorney. The attorney then informs he just tricked them into signing away their names to big budget Hollywood studios who want to reboot the Bluntman & Chronic movie Jay & Silent Bob failed at preventing in Strike Back. Worst of all, the reboot will be directed by Kevin Smith who is advertising fans to attend a fan fest in Hollywood to audition for a cameo! This leads to the duo condemning Kevin Smith, and travelling across the nation to stop Hollywood once again. Conflicts arise during their journey when they run into Jay’s old flame, Justice (Shannon Elizabeth) who informs Jay that he is now a dad. He soon meets his daughter Milly (Harley Quinn Smith), who brings her friends to tag along in order to win that cameo spot in the movie contest. I do not want to be a downer, but the actual core movie I did not care for that much. Jay’s potty-mouth humor had me in stitches in its small doses when he was a side character in the early Smith films, but it is agonizingly overkill here. There are the occasional gags that landed, like a certain free bonus a cab driver offered that appeared a handful of times throughout and Kevin Smith is legitimately good at portraying a kind of over-the-top grating version of himself at the fan convention. Jay eventually putting in an earnest effort at being a good dad in some of the final scenes culminated in some touching moments with Milly. These core parts of the movie that I enjoyed though are only peppered throughout, but what wound up saving Jay and Silent Bob Reboot was the avalanche of cameos littered from beginning to end.

There are some expected cameos from Jason Lee and Ben Affleck coming back as their former View Askew-niverse personas as Brodie and Holden, respectively. I feel safe saying that is not a spoiler since those two had extended cameos relative to the core plot in Strike Back and more-or-less do the same in Reboot. However for the rest of the film, well….I think Kevin Smith dialed in a lot of favors because this is one of the most impressive deluge of cameos in a film yet. Some play amped up versions of themselves, while others are quirky shillers for Funko Pops. During those struggling first two acts of the film, the saving grace was seeing who would pop up next and what Smith had in store for them. There are countless blink and miss it callbacks and references to other View Askew lore and Smith fandom throughout, especially at the convention in the end. I remember Kevin Smith’s early movies being loaded with extra features, and while there is a fair smattering here, it is comparatively lackluster to the deluxe sets from yore. I was stunned the BluRay omits a commentary track which are usually present in most of Smith’s home video releases. I do not blame him since he re-watched it dozens of times on his nationwide tour, but……hold on scratch that after a quick Google search it appears a month ago Smith released a special quarantined-themed commentary track for the film for free on YouTube that can be found right here. Good on him for that! Actual extras on the BluRay are highlighted by a near hour-long bonus merely titled ‘Cast Interviews.’ It is a barrage of two-to-three minute interviews from nearly all the major and minor/cameo players from the film. Lots of good little anecdotes in there and well worth your time! Following that is a half hour extra where Mewes and Smith interview a variety of the cast and crew which a third of is dedicated to….one major cameo I shall not name here. I will give props to Mewes for randomly getting quick interviews from some of the behind-the-scenes crew to make sure they get their proper due. Wrapping up the bonuses is the requisite blooper reel that does not disappoint and a two minute Hair Reel which is solely of Smith and Mewes adjusting their hair between takes.

Part of me wanted to say Reboot was the ideal farewell film of Kevin Smith to watch, but I see he has Clerks III in the pipeline, so I will ultimately have to cave and check that out too. Regardless, if you are a lapsed Kevin Smith fan and wanted one last trek with his style of comedy you grew up with, you kind of get that here and you also get why you left that in the past too. Regardless, Jay and Silent Bob Reboot does have its moments, and the cameos make it well worth riding this out until the end….including all the bonus shots/alt footage in the credits, lots of gold in there too including one last cameo I did not anticipate. Other Random Backlog Movie Blogs 3 12 Angry Men (1957) 12 Rounds 3: Lockdown 21 Jump Street The Accountant Angry Video Game Nerd: The Movie Atari: Game Over The Avengers: Age of Ultron The Avengers: Infinity War Batman: The Dark Knight Rises Batman: The Killing Joke Batman: Mask of the Phantasm Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice Bounty Hunters Cabin in the Woods Captain America: Civil War Captain America: The First Avenger Captain America: The Winter Soldier Christmas Eve Clash of the Titans (1981) Clint Eastwood 11-pack Special The Condemned 2 Countdown Creed Deck the Halls Detroit Rock City Die Hard Dredd The Eliminators The Equalizer Dirty Work Faster Fast and Furious I-VIII Field of Dreams Fight Club The Fighter For Love of the Game Good Will Hunting Gravity Guardians of the Galaxy Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2 Hercules: Reborn Hitman Indiana Jones 1-4 Ink The Interrogation Interstellar Jobs Joy Ride 1-3 Major League Man of Steel Man on the Moon Man vs Snake Marine 3-6 Merry Friggin Christmas Metallica: Some Kind of Monster Mortal Kombat National Treasure National Treasure: Book of Secrets Not for Resale Pulp Fiction The Replacements Reservoir Dogs Rocky I-VII Running Films Part 1 Running Films Part 2 San Andreas ScoobyDoo Wrestlemania Mystery The Secret Life of Walter Mitty Shoot em Up Slacker Skyscraper Small Town Santa Steve Jobs Source Code Star Trek I-XIII Sully Take Me Home Tonight TMNT The Tooth Fairy 1 & 2 UHF Veronica Mars Vision Quest The War Wild Wonder Woman The Wrestler (2008) X-Men: Apocalypse X-Men: Days of Future Past

[moviessilently]

Mary Pickford plays an Italian woman whose brothers have gone off to fight in World War One. Alone and worries, she discovers a sailor washed up on the shore. He tells her that he is an American and they secretly marry but is her husband really who he claims to be?

Home Media Availability: Released on DVD.

Italian dressing.

After co-founding United Artists, the rest of Mary Pickford’s silent career was a balancing act between the child roles and whimsy that her fans had come to love and the heavier, more artistically satisfying parts that Pickford craved.

The Love Light came on the heels of Pollyanna and Suds, the former being a famously sugary child role and the latter a slapstick-and-pathos story of a laundress in love. The Love Light was meant to give Pickford some heavier drama and it was directed by her best friend, noted screenwriter Frances Marion. (By the way, Marion later recalled that both she and Pickford found Pollyanna “nauseating” so a change of pace was needed all around.)

Pickford back in spunky mode.

The Love Light is the story of Angela (Pickford), a young Italian woman whose family operates the local lighthouse. She lives with her two brothers and is being courted by Giovanni (Raymond Bloomer). Of course, the Great War breaks out and her brothers go to fight, as does Giovanni. One brother is killed immediately and Angela waits alone for news of her other loved ones.

One night, Angela finds a man (Fred Thomson, Mr. Frances Marion) washed up on the shore. He says that his name is Joseph and he is an American deserter. Angela feels sorry for him and hides him in her cellar. Naturally, they fall in love and are secretly married. Also, Angela finds out that Germans engrave “Gott mit uns” on just everything. (This coarse exposition is in no way foreshadowing, nope, nope, nope.)

And all I ever find on the beach is a shell or two.

Joseph does have one odd request of his wife: he wants her to give him a “love signal” from the lighthouse at precisely midnight. Angela obeys and, would you believe it, an Italian ship is sunk at precisely that time.

So then Joseph is like, “It’s been real but I have to get back to America, toots.” Angela goes to the village to steal chocolate for him and is nearly caught. When she returns, she finds him asleep in the cellar. She leans closer and…

So THIS is why he kept ordering extra sauerkraut.

In his sleep, Joseph mumbles three words: Gott mit uns.

Sigh. Really, movie? Really? The reveal is silly as silly as an Englishman saying “God save the King!” or an American saying “I pledge allegiance to the flag…” in their sleep. And coming so conveniently on the heels of Angela learning the phrase, it feels artificial and forced.

So, congratulations, Angela. You have married a German spy. And she also discovers that her beloved baby brother was on that ship that was destroyed the night before. Da da DUM!

Angela has some ‘splaining to do.

What will Angela do? Will she give hubby the heave-ho? Watch The Love Light to find out.

Spoiler Because This Really Bugs Me: So, Angela makes her choice and turns her husband over to the villagers, Joseph dies trying to escape, now we just need Giovanni to come home and… What? There’s another half hour remaining? Oh good lord. Basically, we get reel after reel of, “Golly, war sure is awful, isn’t it?” Also, snotty nuns will take your child because they think you’re crazy and will give the infant to a totally random OTHER crazy lady. Yay?

Um, thanks? Signed, Italians

In its review of the picture, Photoplay Magazine stated that “the story is developed without reasonable logic” and I have to agree. Pickford is delightful, especially in the earlier lightweight scenes, but the film jumps around from genre to genre and plot thread to plot thread without sufficiently setting itself up for the transition. Instead, it relies on cheats and old propaganda tricks that were as stale in the 1920s as they are now.

Both silent films and black and white films deserve to be treated as works of art in their own right. Neither sound nor color are missing. That being said, I do get annoyed when the lack of color or sound are used to cheat the viewer of information they could use to solve the mystery.

Don’t mention the war!

For example, the 1947 Bogart and Bacall vehicle Dark Passage hinges on a character adoring the color orange and even having a car in that dramatic shade. Of course, since the film is black and white, we never recognize that distinct car and so the big reveal feels cheap.

The same is the case with The Love Light. To explain his accent, Joseph claims to be an American and Angela believes him. All well and good but we in the audience are denied hearing whether his accent is American or German and so the eventual reveal that he is a German spy feels just as cheap as the Dark Passage finale.

Methinks Gott was not mit anyone during the Great War.

Another problem with the film is that it’s still in Great War Hate the Hun mode when the movies had pretty much moved on. In his review, Carl Sandburg wrote: “It almost looks as though the play was written during the war to be show in Italy to keep alive interest in the war.” The Four Horseman of the Apocalypse, which opened two months after The Love Light, showed the way forward for Great War pictures with its themes of divided families, honor and, of course, a some very hot tangos.

(I know that none of you will have trouble with this distinction but for the Hollywood screenwriters who do not seem to understand this: There were no Nazis in the First World War!)

Some patented Pickford shenanigans.

It seems obvious that Frances Marion was stretched too thin by the project. She had written great screenplays before and she would write great screenplays again but the combined task of writing and directing, plus all the personal baggage that came with a cast full of her nearest and dearest, seems to have been too much. Ironically, Marion fares better as a director than a screenwriter in this picture.

As stated above, Pickford is delightful when she engages in slapstick early in the picture. One of the best and most underrated comediennes in film, Pickford capers and prances and tries to beat up her brothers in the best comedy tradition. She does her best with the later dramatic scenes but the setups are so silly that she is undermined. (Of course, Pickford was the producer, so she also shoulders responsibility for the film’s failures.)

Wounded soldier? Meh. Wounded soldier she knows? TRAGEDY!

Further, Angela is not a particularly appealing heroine on paper because she only acts if something affects her personally. She only turns in Joseph upon realizing that he was directly responsible for her brother’s death, she only takes action to save a storm-battered ship when she realizes her baby is aboard. Any charm in the character is due to Pickford’s talents as an actress.

On the plus side, Henry Cronjager and Charles Rosher’s camera work is absolutely gorgeous. Dramatic shots of storms and boats and fires and silhouettes and candlelight, lamplight and, of course, the lighthouse. Moody, gorgeous and warm, this picture is a feast for the eyes.

In the end, this film is an example of a picture made by enormous talents that just does not work. It’s one of the more heartbreaking facts of the film industry but sometimes everyone can be doing the right thing and still end up with a dud.

The Love Light is a plot that would have worked as a dramatic one-reeler but it just doesn’t have the oomph to be stretched out to feature length. The final third of the film feels tacked on and nothing is really very satisfying. The cinematography is an enormous draw, of course, and the film’s lighter moments work but the whole thing is kind of a mess. It’s an interesting bit of film history but not necessarily great entertainment.

Where can I see it?

The Love Light was released on DVD by Milestone but that edition is out of print. I have not yet viewed the Film Detective release.

***

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The Love Light (1921) A Silent Film Review Mary Pickford plays an Italian woman whose brothers have gone off to fight in World War One.

[justanothercinemaniac]

Epic Movie (Re)Watch #180 - Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed

Spoilers below.

Have I seen it before: Yes

Did I like it then: Yes.

Do I remember it: Yes.

Did I see it in theaters: Yes.

Was it a movie I saw since August 22nd, 2009: No.

Format: DVD

1) So with the first film writer James Gunn had written a darker script meant to poke fun at the original series and gain a PG-13 rating, but after the cast signed on this was changed into a family friendly film. With the sequel, writer Gunn returns and this time everyone knew what kind of movie they were going to make from the beginning (which relates to some more solid structure in this film than the last).

2) Scooby-Doo Theory holds that whoever the protagonists talks to first is the person who did it. The first person they talk to in this film is Alicia Silverstone’s Heather Jasper Howe who ends up being the bad guy.

3) Okay, Coolsville opens up a museum exhibit about Mystery Inc. and their past foes. It is said that the gang, “donated,” the costumes. But…why are the costumes their’s to donate? Aren’t they police evidence? Do they steal the costumes from every crime as some sort of weird trophy and stash them all in a storage locker somewhere? Am I overthinking this? Let’s move on.

4) What the heck!? Seth Green is in this movie!?

5) Linda Cardellini continues to be absolutely excellent as Velma Dinkley, but one side we get to see in this film that we didn’t in the first is lovesick puppy Velma. Her crush on Seth Green’s Patrick is portrayed as cute, sweet, honest, and is just enjoyable to watch. I think Cardellini is great in both of these films and gets an even greater chance to shine in this one.

6) I always liked The Evil Masked Figure in this film.

I think it’s purely a taste of aesthetics. I like the metallic head, the hair, the cloak. He’s not really a character so much as a plot device and he does pale in comparison to the classic monsters which populate the film, but I just dig the design.

7) I think the early action set piece of Shaggy and Scooby getting pulled around the museum by the Pterodactyl Ghost is a little stagey. It FEELS like they’re on a film set as opposed to even the fun of the cartoon chases. But that just may be me.

8) What the fanboy in me loves about this film is the way it brings in all the classic monsters from the old cartoons. James Gunn is a fan himself and it shows because - much like he is able to fill up Guardians of the Galaxy with notable characters, references, and alien species - he brings in a lot of A-list villains from the show. The Black Knight Ghost and the 10,000 Volt Ghost in particular were always favorites of mine and it is REMARKABLY fun to see them, the Tar Monster, the Zombie, Captain Cutler’s Ghost, and The Miner 49-er brought to live action (among others).

9) Okay, so Heather Jasper Howe’s reporting is 100% slander and illegal. She is taking everything Mystery Inc. says out of context to make them appear bad in the public light. Yes, she’s the villain, this is part of the plan. But unless you’re working for an obviously biased news source like Fox News you would not be allowed to get away with this. Still, when I start to question the realism of a Scooby-Doo movies the whole thing falls apart.

10) The primary conflict for Scooby and Shaggy in this film is them questioning their worth/value to the team. This makes for surprisingly interesting character conflict and an equally surprising emotional arc for the film. I like it!

11) According to IMDb:

The original Scooby-Doo episode dealing with the pterodactyl ghost featured a villain and motive that were quite different. The pterodactyl/hang glider costume was used to smuggle pirated music, with the small-town mayor behind the whole scheme.

12) I cannot begin to express how funny my tiny eight year old self found this joke.

Shaggy [after the gang goes through all their notes, which Scooby has been jotting down]: “Scooby-Doo, what’s your conclusion?”

Scooby: “Bunny!”

13) I have a feeling this film had a product placement agreement with Burger King. Scooby was drinking from a Burger King cup earlier and then this:

14) I may have watched The Mummy too many times.

Fred: “What could possibly happen by ringing a doorbell?”

15) So Shaggy messes with a record player and “Baby Got Back” starts playing. Which begs the question: WHO ON EARTH HAS A VINYL OF “Baby Got Back”!?

16) According to IMDb:

At one point in the film, Scooby and Shaggy are pretending to sing into a toilet brush "microphone". The song they are actually singing is Strangers in the Night - Frank Sinatra's version featured the improvised scat lyrics, "Scoo-bee-doo-bee-doo", lyrics which then-CBS executive Fred Silverman chose as the name of the new cartoon series. The original name for the dog was "Too Much", a popular catchphrase of the era.

17) The entire Black Knight Ghost chase through the mansion is very cartoonish, which I mean as a compliment. It feels like it is ripped straight out of an old episode of the cartoon, speaking again to the great way James Gunn handles the source material.

18) Why is Daphne wearing a shirt with her own face on it?

19) Again: this made me laugh so hard as an eight year old.

Black Knight [after Velma kicks him in the nuts]: “Right in the round tables!”

20) This film was released in 2004, can you tell?

Fred: “…this mystery goes down like a dot com and Coolsville digs us again!”

21) I ship Velma and Daphne. I have a feeling so does James Gunn.

(Screenshot taken of a GIF originally posted by @ezekiels)

22) Linda Cardellini gets to be exceptionally funny in this film for one BIG reason:

Patrick: “Do you have to go to the bathroom?”

Velma: “No, I can’t in this outfit.”

23) The Faux Ghost.

This is a wonderful concept featured in the film which once again shows off just how deeply familiar writer James Gunn is with the source material. Just the idea that a bar for all the people Mystery Inc caught exists is wonderfully fun. The art design and characters all stand out in a wonderfully fun scene.

24) Whoa, this is pretty deep for Scooby-Doo 2.

Old Man Wickles [about being a masked villain]: “We needed people to believe we were different than we were. Maybe because we believed there was something wrong with who were in the first place.”

This also means the song which plays in the club - “Thank You For Letting Me By Myself” - has much more meaning than one might initially expect.

25) This line was improvised.

Velma [after she lets out a squeak]: “That was my outfit, I swear.”

26) It’s kinda fun seeing Seth Green go into psychotic badass mode on this goon. My primary experience with him is through “Buffy” where he mostly plays his character as emotionally controlled. This is a fun change from that. Also, Shaggy gets in a sick burn because of it.

Shaggy [after seeing Patrick act a little crazy]: “But we gotta make like your personality and split!”

27) What even is this movie!?

Old Man Wickles [after Scooby gives away his position hiding in a bush]: “Darn bushes toweling at me again.”

AGAIN!?

28) Ah, the potion gag.

So there was a lot of work trying to figure out exactly what gags to use. At one point, Scooby was going to turn into his hand drawn counterpart as a replacement to a much less favored gag of Scooby turning into George W. Bush. The filmmakers didn’t want to compare 3D Scooby with 2D Scooby so they had him turn into the Tasmanian Devil instead. It’s kinda random and pointless, but not unenjoyable. It’s kinda fun to watch, it just has nothing to do with the rest of the plot.

29) In this moment, I am Shaggy.

Shaggy: “We’re gonna die!”

Daphne: “Think positive!”

Shaggy: “We’re gonna die quickly!”

30) Okay hold on a second: the monsters share the same hatred of Mystery Inc. that their portrayers had? But why? They’re not the same people are they? Do they have the memories of their human counterparts? Are they the vision of the criminals who portrayed them fully realized?

31) The old high school clubhouse scene is a surprisingly poignant moment of vulnerability and character interaction for Mystery Inc. The flashback - even though it’s a little cringe worthy seeing the young Mystery Inc (with their awkward imitations of the main cast and weirdly dubbed over voices from the main actors) - allows for us to understand the core of their relationship. In a lot of ways, this is the beating heart of the film. Mystery Inc and the friendship they have with each other.

32) Again: I am Shaggy.

Shaggy [while being chased]: “This is tied for the most terrifying day of my life!”

Velma: “Tied with what?”

Shaggy: “EVERY OTHER FREAKING DAY OF MY LIFE!”

33) HOW DID THE BLACK KNIGHT GET A GHOST HORSE!? Wouldn’t they need a horse costume to do that?

34) Ah, Buffy speak used by a “Buffy” actor.

Daphne: “Taste the pain Mr. Glowy Ugly Thing!”

35) I love this.

Velma [after Shaggy and Scooby say they’re trying to be more like the gang]: “That’s funny. I always wanted to be like you guys.”

This speaks greatly to just how freaking important Shaggy and Scooby are to the group. They’re the beating heart, it’s called Scooby-Doo for a reason. And the fact that Velma is able to so honestly and believably say she wants to be like Shaggy and Scooby is a surprisingly touching moment in the film.

36) It only took Velma 45 years to admit this.

Velma [after her glasses fall off]: “I’ve got to consider contact lenses.”

37) According to IMDb:

The Cotton Candy Glob is a tribute to the Cotton Candy Monsters who appeared in the story "Goop on the Loose" in the Scooby-Doo comics published by DC Comics, where the culprits were a child and two henchmen trying to get revenge from being fired from a carnival. The Cotton Candy Monsters were mentioned in A Pup Named Scooby-Doo: Terror, Thy Name Is Zombo (1989).

38) I JUST got that the game of keep away they play with the monster making control panel reflects the game of frisbee we saw them playing in the flashback.

(GIF originally posted by @leaveatraill)

39) Tar Monster seems like he has a ridiculous amount of power. Like he can single handedly nearly kill ALL of Mystery Inc. Why not just release the Tar Monster on the world? I feel like THAT’D be a better plan!

40) The Evil Masked Figure is unmasked and revealed to be Heather Jasper Howe. But her hair and makeup are perfect. Shouldn’t she have - like - helmet hair or something?

41) Scooby running to Shaggy like they haven’t seen each other in ages is totally unearned. Shaggy just put on a mask and took it off and Scooby acts all excited! But, it’s still kinda nice.

42) What the heck? This film has a secret mini movie!?

A commercial!?

Much like the first Scooby Doo film, Monsters Unleashed is hardly a cinematic masterpiece but the kid in my absolutely loves it. The characterization is continually strong (as is the acting), it’s a lot of fun to see the old monsters in a live action format, and it’s just an enjoyable 90ish minutes. There are movies which have aged worse so if you have fond memories of this or are a fan of the Scooby-Doo franchise, give it a watch.