#like when we list everything in our bios

[scobbe]

I had an amazingly enlightening conversation yesterday with one of the Sisters who run our University and it made me realize I’d been spending so much time looking outward that I had almost forgotten that my own self is sacred, too. This came after a discussion about “boundaries” with someone else but suddenly I began thinking of my own person as a holy city sanctified by God and containing all the gifts that give me joy (one thing the Sister asked me was, observing my “heaviness”, what I do for fun) and how little attention I’ve really paid that city. But if God is within us (and God is, let St. Theresa of Avila tell you about the Interior Castle) then the care of that city is of the greatest importance. I’d just read that St. Augustine ordered priorities as God first, then your own soul, then your neighbor, and then your physical needs. But after God you have to attend to your own person or it actually goes against your nature as a human being. 

I don’t know if I have ever taken inventory of what I actually am as something definite and circumscribed as all human beings are; I think women especially (and if you were deemed “gifted” it’s worse) are expected to be all things to all people, or at very least compromise as much as possible. But in reality we are each extremely unique creations, like individual blades of grass. In our contemporary culture of homogenization and like-seeking through mass appeal, how much more are we subverting our most personal selves? 

If each thing that brings you joy is a building in a city, what is that city like? Is there a garden? A library? I’m going to map this all out. I’m going to draw it if I have to, before I meet with the Sister again in a month.

[genericpuff]

I've been griping about the normalization of identity outing via social media for a while now. To put it simply, it's become almost some weird societal requirement that if you don't have every detail listed about yourself in your Twitter/FB/etc. bio, then it means you have "something to hide" or that you're not as "verifiable" because your account looks indistinct from that of a bot.

But that societal norm has really only benefited the people who profit off of that information in some way, whether it's through selling user data or through weaponizing details about a person against them.

I know that a lot of us love to use the fun little labels and acronyms in our bio that help others like us identify us as a 'safe person' or as someone who's in the same social/racial/identity groups as them. We're humans, we love to categorize things, it's in our nature (and it's fun!)

But if there's any time to start regulating that habit and challenging the norm that you're obligated to include all your personal info online - it's now.

There was a time when sock puppet accounts were expected and typical, not "suspicious".

There was a time when even age-sex-location was considered "too much information", but once it became the norm, we only EVER gave our personal information beyond generic ASL to people who we knew both online and in real life, or at the very least, people who we had known online for a significant enough amount of time that they had proved to be trustworthy (and even then, we didn't owe that information to anyone, ever; there are forum friends who I made online 10+ years ago and still talk to who do not know my personal information beyond broad strokes).

There was a time when simply being an avatar with a funny username was enough. And it still is enough, but massive platforms like Facebook and Twitter have been brainwashing us for years to believe that's not the case, under the guise of, "You wouldn't want to be dishonest, would you?" Through these same norms, we were led to believe that anime profile pictures are cringe, that having a fake online name is stupid, that the photos of you having fun at social events have to be taken JUST right otherwise you might imply to others that you're not actually having fun.

And considering how long these platforms have been around now, we have entire generations of children now who have been born and raised on that version of the ZuckMusk web, who have been taught that it "protects them" to express to everyone publicly their age, their school, their workplace, their family members, everything about themselves, because to not do so would be disingenuous.

None of this is to imply that the Internet was "safer" back in the day. I definitely should not have been on the Internet as much as I was when I was 13 in the late 2000's, it definitely did not benefit my brain development or my social skills. But the version of the Internet we currently exist in now is one that's been predicated on the false sense of security - the belief that if you're honest, everyone else has to be, too.

We've always had ways of identifying our safe people - by participating in the communities that we know are designed around our hobbies, our interests, our people. They might be small, they might not be as "cool" as the idea of netting yourself a big following of thousands of people, but they're also a lot safer and more genuine than that idealized following ever could be.

Don't feel pressured to include every bit of information about yourself in your bio. Even on Facebook, there's no rule that says you have to list your workplace, your school, your family members. There's no rule that says you have to list your personality type, queer labels, and neurodivergent disorders in your Twitter bio. There's no rule that you have to "prove" your life is real and fulfilled through the verification of photos, location tagging, and open-book sharing. If you share those photos, it should be because you genuinely want to share them, not because you feel some societal pressure to live up to others' expectations.

And I guarantee you, even your local mutuals on Facebook - your former classmates, family friends, distant relatives, coworkers, etc. - do not actually give that much of a damn about your personal life that they should be owed that much of a look into it on a daily basis. They've got their own shit going on, they literally do not need to know every detail about you.

I know it sounds scary. It also sounds kind of boring, when we've been used to a certain "way" of browsing and participating for years, that if we don't do so, it feels like being in the "out group" and that we're "breaking the rules". But I promise you, after spending over half my life online, those rules do not exist or benefit anyone who wouldn't profit off that information.

If you're wanting to learn how to branch off from major platforms like Facebook and Twitter and/or become more self-sufficient online, here are some guides to navigating the Internet like an old schooler that may help you!

FREE SITE BUILDER:

DIGITAL PIRACY 101:

(also in addition to everything mentioned here ^^^ they neglect to also mention Tor Browser which is a light and free-to-use browser software that allows you to browse anonymously; note that it's similar to a VPN in that it helps hide your identity online, HOWEVER it won't mask you from your ISP quite as effectively as a VPN, and if you sign into personal accounts with Tor, that's still going to obviously out you online lmao but I love using Tor for the odd time when I need to make a sock puppet for something and don't want it linked to my IP! and unlike a VPN, it's free to use!)

LEARN HOW TO USE RSS FEEDS:

People still use these! They're especially helpful for getting updates from your favorite pages and sites directly to your browser WITHOUT having to worry about stupid algorithm bullshit picking and choosing what you see. And many sites DO have RSS support once you know how to find it! (like adding in /rss at the end of a URL! Like this!)

FAKE EMAIL SERVICES:

LEARN HOW TO CODE IN HTML/CSS/JAVASCRIPT (AND MORE!):

DECENTRALIZED SOCIAL MEDIA PLATFORMS:

I hope this helps arm you with some new knowledge in how to navigate the Internet like a Certified Old Person™️(like meeee!) Make your secret alt blogs for besties! Make your formal Facebook accounts that are clean of personal information and present the most neutral, safe-for-work version of yourself and keep the fun stuff to the secret profiles and chat groups that are just for you and friends/family/etc!! It might be "inconvenient" to have multiple accounts for the same purpose, but it's also INCREDIBLY freeing and can make your online experience both safer and more enjoyable.

Being "less" of yourself online does not make you any less you. It is your identity - you do not owe any amount of it to anyone beyond yourself. And in times like these, your identity is your greatest asset. Protect it.

[bovineblogger]

Just wanted to pitch my two cents in response to the previous anon! Hi friend, I know for a lot of us who get our food shrink wrapped and packaged at the grocery store it’s mind boggling to even imagine there’s a healthy way of animal husbandry.

I grew up in The Big City™️ but was raised by my grandparents. They grew up farming (just crops, their families were too poor to own livestock or purchase meat/milk/eggs) and taught me to have an incredible respect for where food comes from. We grew our own crops in the tiny backyard, composted, and did aquaculture even before I knew what it was. We bought our smaller meat from the local butcher minimally processed. You had to debone and process the whole chicken, fish, rabbit, frogs, etc. Grandpa traded his veggies for different fruits with the other oldies. Grandma made her own wine and yogurt. And I’ve worked and volunteered at animal shelters and wildlife rescue/rehab centers growing up. I still compost nearly all of my food waste. Even then, I didn’t truly understand the extent to which a properly cared for animal farm could be healthy and ethical.

Until I met one of my previous partners that is. They grew up in an incredibly rural area on a family farm that had animals, including a herd of cows for meat. They hunted, but always to protect the livestock and made use of the animals they killed/sold them to others in town who would. It seemed so counterintuitive to my sensibilities and raised my hackles at first. How could you say you love animals and do that? But I began asking questions…for hours and hours because it was nothing I’d been exposed to.

The way they and their family cared for/revered their animals seemed almost religious to me when I first encountered it. From the time they were kids, it was always the animals’ chores first. You woke up but fed and milked the cows before you made yourself breakfast. They made blankets for the animals and read to them. You gave the herd everything they needed and then some. If something in the barn needed fixing, that would happen first before new windows for the house. The animals had their own things and toys and treats. It was love! There were never cattle prods or whips or any of the machinery you associate with industrial farming. The animals would greet them happily every morning. They loved and trusted their people back enough to be naughty a way a pampered cat is. It really sunk in when I stood next to a cow for the first time — there’s nothing that would stop that animal from harming you, especially if you were a kid, unless it respected you and loved you back.

(They once told me the story of how some large predator like a bear or wolf tried to sneak into the pasture at night. The family woke up there next morning to a furry pancake that had been utterly stomped into the ground by the herd.)

A whole lifetime later, they can still remember the names, personalities, and stories of all the animals they raised. I would get bored and try to list off random names as a game to see if they ever had an animal called that, actually. But the thing that initially shocked (and stuck with me the most) was that when they’d take an older cow to the butcher, they would get packages of meat back labeled with that animal’s name. But it wasn’t ever scary or traumatizing for the kids. They always knew where food was from. Sometimes they were even there helping when that animal was born in the barn. What that did was give them an incredible sense of care, respect, and duty for those animals. When they had dinner that night, they would say grace and mean it in a way you only could if you viewed that animal as an equal family member. I was raised religious, but had never heard grace said like that, with that amount of genuine intent until I ate dinner with them. It used to be just something I did, just going through the motions.

That being said, yes it would probably be the most bio energy efficient/less emissions heavy if the whole world shifted away from a meat-based diet. But ideal isn’t always realistic/something we can achieve overnight. Meat alternatives are often expensive or time consuming to prepare (like beans/legumes). The way I see it, this blog is part of a harm reduction approach in facilitating an appreciation/love/education for livestock and then encouraging people to seek out more mindful sources of meat, like some local farms. We’ve seen time and time again, shame/blame are far less effective in getting people to re-examine their worldviews than education and love.

thank you so much for this ask, this is so so so so so lovely!!! i feel like a lot of people that arent farmers or dont have farmers in their family dont really understand just how much love is there.

[btsmosphere]

Supercharged | JJK - Masterlist

Now Completed!!

🗲summary:

It starts with a blow to the chest that changes your life. When your city’s most celebrated hero pays a visit, it turns out the noble Bolt has no trouble tossing lives aside. Lives that won't be missed. Lives like yours. Seven mysterious and powerful men give you another chance – one that starts to feel more like a curse the moment you meet golden boy Jungkook. The boy who wants you as far from his brothers as he can get you. Is it you he hates, or the blue lightning that now runs through your veins? And could it be his golden light that illuminates your heart when darkness threatens?

🗲pairing: jungkook x female reader 🗲overall word count: ~80k 🗲genre: angst, action, slow burn, enemies to lovers, superheroes/villains au, found family 🗲rating: pg15 🗲warnings: violence with superpowers, weapons, swearing, arguing, injury, past trauma, mentions of death (these are general warnings; chapter-specific warnings are listed per chapter)

Teaser

Character Moodboards/Bios: Jungkook | Yoongi | Hobi | V | Jimin | Jin | Namjoon | You

Supercharged Playlist

Chapter 1 - The Light Dies He’s the hero. Unfortunately for you, you’re not the villain.

Chapter 2 - Reign of Mercy There’s a whole world here, where your curse can start to bloom…

Chapter 3 - Figure it Out You become Jungkook’s problem.

Chapter 4 - We aren't Heroes, Honey A chaotic arrival turns everything on its head, and the boys are ready to let you in on their real game.

Chapter 5 - Scared of a Little Lightning With the threat of Bolt rising, so do tensions within the base.

Chapter 6 - Burn Out When things get ahead of you, your powers aren’t the only things to spill over; some truth is ready to breach the surface.

Chapter 7 - Spark to Life “We don’t have time to argue” “No, we don't”

Chapter 8 - On the Force Jungkook smiles at you for the first time (and the second).

Chapter 9 - Thank me Later Our villains get their moment in the sun (well, the fire…)

Chapter 10 - Is This Not Control? You’re forced to come to terms with the danger – and the beauty – in the way your powers burn.

Chapter 11 - Right Beside You Jungkook has you to thank, if only he knew how.

Chapter 12 - Into the Depths If you aren’t cut out to be with them, then you’ll just have to go it alone.

Chapter 13 - One of Us Jungkook doesn’t seem to be angry for the reasons you expected.

Chapter 14 - Cover Me An unprecedented strike at the heart of bangtan leaves you baring yours.

Chapter 15 - Powerless It’s time to make the fight on your terms.

Epilogue - Sweet Taste How it all boiled down.

Updates every Sunday! To be on the taglist, send me a message, ask or comment!💜(now closed as series is completed! but comments are always still welcome)

[bettsfic]

Betts. how do I stop feeling jealous of everyone and everything and just focus on myself? I'm tired of being comprised of nothing but envy.

story time:

so i was recently at Millay, which is one of the top artist residencies in the country. they have an acceptance rate of something like 3%. when i was shown my room, there was a packet of all the residents' artist bios. i sat down and read through all of them. most of them were like half a page in length, single-spaced, listing out accomplishments i could never dream of. one artist had won a guggenheim. one author had published 12 books. another author published her first book at 19 years old. these were people who were extremely well accomplished and respected in their fields.

and we all became very good friends!

and then there was me. my bio was 3 sentences listing out a couple short publications and awards and other residencies i'd done. and my honest to god first thought was, "wow, the jurors must have really liked my writing to have accepted me among all these great artists."

and my second thought was, "that's the healthiest thing i have ever thought."

i had no jealousy of their accomplishments. even though my career hadn't even begun compared to theirs, i didn't attend dinner that night with any impostor syndrome. and that confirmed for me that i had grown out of whatever place i used to be in as a person, where i was basically a raw wound wrapped in barbed wire. everything hurt me and i hurt everything in return.

jealous feelings come from an intense need of external approval, but as i've mentioned in other asks, approval and validation is a well that gets filled over time. at our introductory dinner that night, i didn't talk about my work in the hope of convincing everyone i deserved to be there, which was what i would've done a few years before. instead we all ended up talking about a TV show. the most highbrow place i've ever been in my life, and we're getting wine drunk and discussing at length a cheesy discovery channel reality series. the guggenheim winner: loves box turtles. the guy who's published 12 books: his favorite movie is Spirited Away. the girl who published a book at 19: reads One Direction fanfic. the well-lauded poet: old school tumblrina.

actually, 4 out of 7 of us read fanfic and we had some great conversations about it. sometime i'll tell you about introducing the co-director of the residency to AO3.

when you think of the most accomplished and successful writer you've ever read, remember that they are, at the very core of their being, a nerd. and if you were to eat dinner with them, you would, with enough polite inquisitiveness, be able to unlock the goofy side of them that binges Property Brothers.

so that was the big change for me, i think. i started asking a lot of questions. i stopped talking and i started listening. it seems counterintuitive that admitting to not knowing stuff shows confidence, but it does. pretending you know stuff is what looks insecure. i think for me, i put so much of myself in my work, i wanted my work to be lauded so i could feel accomplished, and feeling accomplishment would let me believe i deserved to exist. but over time, i've reframed that mentality. my work is a thing that exists beyond me and is private to those who read it. it comes from me, but it is not me. what i am is just the person i am, and my life is a series of moments i choose for myself, and i am allowed to exist.

even sending this ask shows that you've begun filling your well. it takes someone who's already come a long way to realize jealousy isn't the status quo and is a feeling to be overcome. and you can overcome it. you can reach a place where you have enough success that other people's success has nothing to do with you, and you're free to just be happy for them. and when you read work that's better than yours you feel joy at learning something new.

so put your work into the world and let it be rejected. you'll rack up a couple wins or close calls, and those will give you energy to be rejected some more. and eventually you'll be rejected so much that rejection doesn't feel like anything, and you will have won enough to realize your work has a place in the world, and that place is no bigger or smaller than anyone else's. your work is allowed to exist simply as it is, and you are allowed to exist simply as you are.

[madraynesims]

The Sims 2 PSP Cut Content: Part 1

I had been looking for the best way to implement this info on the Sims Wiki (but these are cut Sims, so there's not really a place for them? Or maybe someone else can do it). I've also been working on some videos talking about them. (I love watching these types of videos and prefer that visual format) but at this rate who knows when I'll finish it. So here we go! If you love Strangetown and crave any ounce of lore that you can get like me, here's a few townies. They even have their own secrets! Please read p6tgel's post to get all the info about the cut character TA7, everything I know about him is over there, so I don't have anything to add here. All I'm going to say is... I remember wanting to find out so badly who Mister Smith's friend was after playing The Sims 2 PSP for the first time. I'm so glad they actually did add more to the story. Learning more about the alien society and getting another title (like Pollination Technicians) just makes me want a Sixam neighborhood even more lol go read about it!!

Missing Kine Society Cult Members

Tunak Tun

Tunak is the only cut character that I could find photo evidence of in an old screenshot. He is a cut Kine Leader (like Sara Starr), as seen in his brown robe talking to Bull Dratch. The schedule file for the Kine Dairy indicates that Tunak would have spawned only during the day.

Unfortunately, it's a view of his back, but his character file confirms this appearance. (just want to say... the details on the Kine robes are actually beautiful. The crunched down quality we got in the final release makes them look like rags) Gender: 0 = female, 1 = male. The eye color is only specified if they're not the default brown. (I'll be using the Sims 2 PC to recreate them, as it shares a lot of assets with the PSP version)

Tunak Tun's Details

Bio: "A member of the Kine Society." social = 7, intimidation = 1, personality = 1, His social and intimidation scores are on the lower end for Deadtree locals, so social games aren't as difficult. He has the Air personality type. His topic sets (interests) are cow, cow milk, cow bell, cow beast, full moon, and crystal ball. A visual of these:

Tunak Tun's Secrets

 (Personal): "Has been known to sneak in a burger or two on the sly."

 (Intimate): "Likes to wear loose robes for that 'fresh and ventilated' feeling."

 (Dark): "He actually just made up his other two Secrets. He's a pathological liar."

According to the game code, Tunak Tun would also count towards the goal to "Earn the Trust of a Kine Leader [Relationship 4]", just like Sara Starr and Sinjin Balani.

Zen Mu

Zen Mu is regular Kine Society member that wears a white robe. The schedule file for the Kine Dairy indicates that Zen would have spawned only during the night.

I went through every face template available in the Sims 2 PSP CAS and I can't find Zen Mu's (might be hidden like some hairs/clothes are) and I don't see the stubble hair in the PC version.

Zen Mu's Details

Bio: "A member of the Kine Society." social = 7, intimidation = 1, personality = 2, Their social and intimidation scores are on the lower end for Deadtree locals, so social games aren't as difficult. They have the Water personality type. Their topic sets (interests) are cow, cow milk, cow bell, and cow beast. A visual of these:

Zen Mu's Secrets

 (Personal): "Severe lactose intolerance has made her unpopular in the Kine Society."

 (Intimate): "She is deathly afraid of cows, but don't let the cows find out … they thrive on fear."

 (Dark): "When she meditates, her power animal is a horse … the highest form of Kine blasphemy."

Interestingly, Zen Mu's gender and character model is male, but all 3 of Zen's secrets uses she/her pronouns. Small fun fact - Personal Kine robe for the player: It looks like we would have received our own kine robe at one point, probably after passing inspection, according to the item list file (item 72). Now, we can just go to a wardrobe and buy a robe ourselves.

Extra fun fact that I randomly like to talk about on my twitch streams, but I don't remember if I've said it over here? These two award winning cows were actually given names by the devs in the Kine Dairy level spawning file. Bessie and Gertie! <3

[strxwbloody]

BEHIND A FACADE | the series

"There is a shadow of truth behind every smile, behind every song. But what happens when the veil of the facade falls, revealing the darkest secrets that lie behind the stage of our lives?"

ghoul!enhypen x ccg!reader [afab]

genre: horror, e2l, reverse harem (though it seems centered on Jungwon, but it is not so), dark themes, nsfw (mdni)

warning: drawn up in future chapters

please remember that this is a work of fiction, nothing is to be practiced or represents anyone in reality.

Synopsis: Song y/n is a determined and hardworking young woman, ready to follow in her father’s footsteps by becoming an investigator in the Commision of Counter Ghoul (CCG) in Seoul. However, her enthusiasm is thwarted by traumatic memories of the ghoul attack that ripped her mother’s life away and marked her childhood. Growing up unaware of the existence of ghouls, y/n only discovers this terrible reality through tragedy.

Now, years later, she's ready to start her career in the CCG, but the past comes back to haunt her when her friend Molan mysteriously disappears during a concert of the popular band Enhypen and y/n begins to suspect that there is something dark behind the band’s sparkling facade.

Determined to discover the truth, y/n plunges into a dangerous investigation that will bring her face to face with her past and Jungwon, an old childhood friend who is now part of the Enhypen. Unlike his bandmates, Jungwon is a guy with a complex ethic, divided between his nature and his humanity.

United by childhood memories and a cruel fate, y/n and Jungwon find themselves on opposite sides but irresistibly attracted to each other. As y/n tries to unravel the conspiracies behind the disappearances and stop the threat of ghouls, she discovers that Jungwon is not quite like his bandmates, and a complex relationship begins to develop between them and the rest of the other guys.

Each step brings her closer to the truth, but it also puts her at risk of losing everything she holds most dear.

You will be dragged on an exciting journey where the line between good and evil dissolves into darkness, and where y/n will have to choose between her duty or her heart.

A/N: I state that English is not my first language. This is not the first time I tried to write something about ghouls, the other "works" abandoned if we can say it will be deleted. I hope this is a motivation to keep writing. In addition, along with the work will also be published special illustrations of the characters made by me, at the moment in the process. Here if you want I published the 𐃘 Sunoo one. ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶

⤷ [illustrations wip] ⤷ [TAGLIST OPEN SOON] If you want to be tagged you can write below the post or send me requests with anonymous disabled if possible, I will consider accounts with a certain age on bio. I will also consider a perm list. ♡

⤷ [navigation]

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If you would like to use or share any of my content, please contact me first to get permission.

Thank you for respecting my intellectual property and for supporting my creative work.

© 2024 strxwbloody

[oldguardleatherdog]

I am being smeared as a "predatory transphobe" to hundreds of thousands of people by Rainbow Passage, a so-called "trans rescue" nonprofit that's covering up its safety failures and misconduct by attacking me and placing my family in danger. Deliberately.

There's a headline I'll bet you never thought you'd see on this blog, and you can be sure I never expected to write it, but here we are. I want you to hear about it from me first before the smear campaign against me poisons your feed.

Regular readers know that I've been fighting for LGBTQ+ civil rights for nearly 40 years, with an emphasis on mobilizing against the "trans panic" sweeping America the past two years, the horrific laws already in place, and the stark plans for eradication laid out in Project 2025. The notion that I'm "transphobic" in any way is absurd. But -

Three weeks ago, YouTube streamer trolls went to the Rainbow Passage website - their unsecured, login-free website - looking for dirt that could bring their operations to a halt. They found my picture and bio listed as a director for the organization.

That was all they needed, and in short order I was the star of several full-length videos and livestreams featuring breathless, jeering takes on my kink life, my history, my family, my age, my AIDS, my September 11th survival (suddenly I was "running the organization" and "hosting 9/11 reenactment roleplays!"), my looks, my unsuitability to be involved with a trans rescue organization, and everything you can imagine a middle-school playground would highlight. At this writing, I've been held out for ridicule, harassment, and threats ("it's time for this dogfucker to be euthanized") to a quarter-million people and counting.

Why?

Because Rainbow Passage failed to implement even the most basic security on that website, despite my multiple warnings in board meetings that this scenario was likely to happen and that we were prime targets for this kind of abuse.

To be honest, everything that the streamers made fun of me for has been said and done to me a thousand times a year for the past 30 years. Heard it all before, nothing new, just the same old "lookit the AIDS-ridden perv faggot old man pretending to be a dog, hurr durr hurr durr!". All those hours of video and they couldn't come up with anything new? These people need better writers.

Here's the issue: Two of the leaders of this sad and tiresome brigade (one named "Blowcockx" or something equally clever, the other one is discussed below) seized on a recent exchange I had with a group of leftist "Trans For Trump" (yep, you read that right) that was mobbing me on Bluesky for objecting when someone referred to Biden as "Genocide Joe". These people were vile and vicious, saying that my gender was "shit beard" and lobbing remarks and insults at me that would make a MAGA blush.

One of the Bluesky mob (who may or may not have been transgender) said, "Prove you're an activist," to which I countered, "Okay, prove you're trans." (Screenshots of my three additional replies referencing "fake trans" to their accusations of my being a "fake activist" and other vomitous epithets, along with screenshots of the posts to which I was replying, can be found after the jump.)

During the mob attack on me and Rainbow Passage. a disgruntled former member of the Rainbow Passage community - a 20-year-old trans girl who had first warned me about the YouTube hijacking and who leaked my personal identifying information and private chats with her to the Twitter trolls and worse - went to Clearsky and harvested my replies without the posts I was replying to, leaked them to the YouTube streamers and Twitter trolls, along with selected portions of our lengthy private chat from Discord, then threatened Rainbow Passage with another attack if they didn't "denounce" me and my replies to the disgusting attacks on me by the Trans Trumpers of Bluesky.

To prove her point, this young trans woman and her girlfriend started a thread about me on Kiwi Farms, where I was the featured post for about a week, and told Rainbow Passage that the same would happen to them - and worse, including the revocation of their nonprofit status with the IRS and the end of their ability to raise funds - if they didn't publicly condemn me for my Bluesky attack replies.

And what did the oh-so-courageous chairwoman and board members who "cared so much" about me, do in response to those threats?

They caved. They capitulated. They allowed a troubled individual with an axe to grind and her little gang of fake-outraged trans shitposters to dictate their handling of a serious and sensitive matter where a former director of the organization and his family were in active danger and under siege. These people, who claim to have the bravery to "rescue" endangered trans people from Texas and Florida, folded like a cheap tissue-paper prom dress, revealing their utter lack of integrity, ethics, or courage.

The statement Rainbow Passage put out, which at this writing has been seen by at least 60,000 people on Twitter alone, is filled with false accusations about my attitude toward the transgender members of the LGBTQ+ community, outright lies about my character and conduct, weirdly characterizes me as a predatory stalker, and warns the general public that I am a bad, bad person who should be avoided and shunned as unfit for decent people in a civilized society. They provide ZERO evidence to support any of their claims against me, their accusations and assertions about me, or their characterization of me as "transphobic."

From my statement below: "Rainbow Passage knew that issuing this statement would intensify the threats, harassment, and stalking of me and my family. They issued it anyway. This statement is a willful and malicious act of violence.

"Rainbow Passage caused a queer elder with AIDS to be featured on a website known for harassing LGBTQ+ people to death and driving them from their homes, while smearing him to hundreds of thousands of people and inciting attacks on him and his family - but they want you to trust them to keep our most vulnerable members safe from harm."

If Rainbow Passage can't and won't protect their own staff (and volunteers, and clients) from harmful exposure to malicious attackers online and IRL, and shifts blame for their failures and lapses of care onto the staff members while caving to threats from random kids, how can they be trusted to keep the most vulnerable members of this community safe from harm during one of their "rescue" missions? If something goes wrong and that client ends up in jail, will Rainbow Passage blame the client for that outcome the same way they're blaming me for their colossal failure to keep their own people safe?

Rainbow Passage's rank AIDSphobia, their calculated smear of a four-decade veteran LGBTQ+ and HIV/AIDS activist, their capitulation to threats from an under-21 trans Kiwi Farms shitposter with an axe to grind, and their hateful, craven, deliberate act of putting my family and me in physical danger, show them to be not only a collection of unwise and uncaring individuals who have abused me and betrayed my trust: The current chairwoman, board, and staff of Rainbow Passage are manifestly and utterly unfit to run this organization. They are not capable of keeping our most vulnerable members out of harm's way, they should not be regarded as worthy of our trust in any way, personally or professionally, and the organization needs to be stripped of its nonprofit status and must cease operations so that a new LGBTQ+ and trans rescue group can quickly be established and get to work.

[Alt text and screenshots follow after the jump.]

STATEMENT OF ANIMAL J. SMITH REGARDING THE RAINBOW PASSAGE SMEAR CAMPAIGN

These allegations are false. Rainbow Passage is deliberately and maliciously spreading lies about me to hundreds of thousands of people on this and other platforms in a calculated smear campaign to cover up their reckless disregard for the safety of their vulnerable clients and their failure to protect them. To date, they have provided no explanation or evidence of "transphobic rhetoric and behavior" on my part. They failed to protect me, a former director of the organization, from sustained and brutal online harassment, threats, doxing, and stalking that began more than three weeks ago and continues unabated with the active encouragement of chair Amy Nicole Check and the members of the board, putting me and my family in danger of being driven from our home and causing major distress and disruption to our lives and health.

On Saturday, April 13th, I received word that the Rainbow Passage website had been targeted by YouTube streamers who had seen a rival say good things about the organization and went to the website to find information that would "expose" Rainbow Passage. The trolls found my name and photograph, then went into my public-facing social media and began streaming about me and my life and work.

In several lengthy videos and livestreams, the YouTube trolls held me and my family up for sustained public ridicule, humiliation, and targeted harassment, spreading to more than a quarter-million people details about my personal life, my sex life, my family, my being a survivor of September 11th, the fact that I have AIDS, and every other aspect of my life and history that they could harvest. Although my social media is largely public by design, the contents were never intended to be stolen and distributed to thousands in a malicious manner designed to damage me.

The only reason I was targeted and humiliated in this way is that I was a director for Rainbow Passage and was discovered when the organization's unsecured, login-free website was targeted - a scenario I had warned them about on multiple occasions. Despite my warnings, no security measures were ever implemented. On Monday, April 15th, I resigned my position due to Check's exploding at me in an unprovoked torrent of verbal abuse during a call that afternoon.

My work as an LGBTQ+ and HIV/AIDS activist over the past 38 years (including ACT/UP, Queer Nation SF, AIDS quarantine initiatives, medical cannabis, marriage equality, and prisoners with AIDS) is well known and has always included advocacy for the transgender community. In fact, I have prioritized trans rights activism in response to the rising tide of hatred toward transgender Americans, and I have received support from people in the transgender community who know me and have seen me in action as an activist and a friend.

After an initial offer of help that wouldn't come for a full week, I said that my family and I were in immediate danger, that this was happening solely because I was part of their organization, and that their security failure was to blame. They then instantly denied any responsibility, blamed me for the situation, and withdrew their offer of help. I have been told that they are aware of the ongoing harassment and cyberbullying being directed at my family and me. They knew that this statement would intensify the threats, harassment, and stalking of me and my family. They issued it anyway. This statement is a willful and malicious act of violence.

Rainbow Passage was threatened by the leaders of these attacks that if they did not "denounce" me they would face the loss of their tax-exempt status and worse. As part of the threat, I was featured on the front page of the notorious Kiwi Farms website, a 4chan-like forum known for driving their LGBTQ+ targets into hiding and to suicide.

Rainbow Passage caused a queer elder with AIDS to be featured on a website known for harassing LGBTQ+ people to death and driving them from their homes, while smearing him to hundreds of thousands of people and inciting attacks on him and his family - but they want you to trust them to keep our most vulnerable members safe from harm.

These liars want you to believe the fiction that a four-decade LGBTQ+ activist is a predatory transphobe. They think you'll fall for the stories they're telling and approve of the damage they're causing. What nerve. Their contempt for me - and for you - has no place in our community or in our lives.

- Animal J. Smith, April 25, 2024

[myveryownfanfiction]

Chapter 5

18+ MINORS AND THOSE WITHOUT AGE IN BIO DNI

tags: @illiana-mystery, @iobsessoverfictionalmen

warnings: swearing, period accurate sexism and misogyny, bigotry

After taking me out cruising around Castle Rock, Ace had backed off slightly. I went back to work and Ace tried not to hang around all the time. I looked up from the register as Eyeball came into the shop.

"Hey." I said as he walked over. He smiled at me.

"Hey." Eyeball handed me a piece of paper. "Ace didn't think he'd be able to come in today." I noticed the second piece of paper tucked behind the first and looked at the top of it. In Ace's neat handwriting was his reason for not coming himself. He thought he'd blow my cover. I ducked my head to hide my smile as Eyeball chuckled. "Sent me with the list."

"That busy today huh?" I asked as Gary came out onto the floor. Eyeball wasn't a stranger to the shop, but Gary really only tolerated Ace. The other boys he seemed to have a vendetta against.

“yeah. I finished my car pretty quick so ace said to come get the shit we need.” Eyeball said, eyeing Gary who was skirting around the edge of the shop. “He said stop by the office for rent on your way to the apartment.” I nodded as I grabbed the stuff off the list. Ducking behind the counter, I folded up aces note and shoved it in my pocket. I grabbed a can of oil and slid it onto the counter.

“alright that’s all of it.” I said. “I can bring the paint that came in when I get off. I know those cars aren’t coming in until next week.” Eyeball nodded and handed over the money.

“see ya later (Y/B/N).” Eyeball said as he lugged everything out the door.

“I still can’t believe you live above that shop.” Gary said, standing at the window and watching eyeball head into the garage.

“It was cheap and clean.” I shrugged. “Ace isn’t a terrible landlord and our hours work out. By the time I’m here, they’re opening. When I’m going home, they’re closing. I can’t complain much about that.” Gary shook his head.

“guess not.” He shrugged. “Why don’t you take the rest of the day off? Relax for a bit.” I shrugged.

“sure. Why not?” I joked. I went in back to grab the paint and boxed it up. “See ya tomorrow Gary.” I called as I walked through the shop.

“take the week off! Consider it a perk of employee of the month!” Gary called back. I laughed and waved over my shoulder. I headed over to the garage and nodded at the guys as I walked over to the office.

“ace!” I called, leaning against the door and looking over the shop.

“out back smoking!” Billy called back. “Remind me to cut your hair tomorrow. It’s getting a bit long!” I saluted him before heading out back.

“hey handsome.” I said, walking over to ace. He smirked at me as he leaned against the building. “Gary can see us so don’t do anything.”

“wouldn’t dream of it.” He said, smiling at me as I leaned against the wall next to him. “Get my note?”

“yeah but I didn’t read the whole thing.” I said. “Gary cut me once eyeball left. Gave me the rest of the week off.” Ace nodded.

“sounds nice.” He said. “Got any plans?” I shook my head.

“not unless you wanna head to the next town over…” I hinted. Ace smiled at me.

“Sounds like a plan.” Ace agreed. He put out his cigarette and we headed back in. “Thanks for bringing the paint over.” I nodded and ace sat down on the couch, ushering me over. I sat down next to him and he threw an arm over my shoulders. “Feels nice to just sit for a minute.”

“yeah it does.” I agreed. “Remind me to have Billy cut my hair tomorrow. He said it was getting long.” Ace nodded before leaning his head against mine.

“sounds good. We can head out before he does it.” Ace said. “I’ll talk to him.” We settled into a comfortable silence. Ace grabbed my legs and pulled them into his lap. I laughed and kissed him softly. “Been wanting to do that all day. It’s why I didn’t go over there.” I nodded and kissed him again. “Why don’t you read my note?” I pulled it out of my pocket and unfolded it.

“Or you could tell me what you said?” I bargained. Ace chuckled before nodded.

“Well first off, you look very nice today.” Ace said, kissing my cheek. “And I explained that I couldn’t go in today because I didn’t think I could stop myself. I don’t know how I’m holding back now.” Ace teased. I smiled at him and pulled him in for another kiss.

“you don’t need to anymore ace.” I whispered. “We’re in your office. In your garage. You can kiss me all you want.” Ace squeezed my waist as he kissed me deeply. He hummed as I cupped his cheeks.

“you need to shave soon.” I said as I pulled away. Ace laughed before running his hand over his jaw.

“probably.” He agreed. “Wouldn’t want to grow a beard.”

“I like the stubble. But a beard would be a bit much.” I agreed.

“hmmm.” Ace smirked at me. “That gives me an idea.”

“what idea?” I asked. Ace picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. I laughed as I grabbed onto his shirt.

“you’ll see.” He laughed as he headed up to my apartment.

[serickswrites]

Lonely Place of Longing XV.V (The missing chapter)

Master list link here (includes chapter links, summary, and character bios)

A/N: I took this chapter out because it made references to things I hadn't talked about in this story (but will in the prequel series!). And because I felt like it would have made the chapter after this one (and in the story's current iteration Chapter 16) less climactic--though it probably would have been pretty climactic with the cliff hanger in hindsight. It's a short one, so please enjoy. The final chapter will be out on its usual post day!

Warnings: physical violence, blood, knife, stabbing, wounds, referenced death, character death, mcd, unconsciousness, referenced heat injury

“You are sadly still so predictable,” Owen drawled as he grabbed for another knife from his bandolier of blades. He had slipped back into their native tongue. He had, Dylan realized, always spoken to Dylan in their mother tongue. Only when it was absolutely necessary did he use the language native to Patricanus.

And you haven’t changed either. “Does it matter? We both know how this ends, Owen. Give it up.” I will end you. I will rip you limb from limb. I will destroy you. You did this. You gave me no choice.

“Yes, it ends with me winning and imbuing your sweet paramour. Do you think she will be as monstrous as me? Or perhaps as monstrous as you?” Owen chuckled as he dodged another attack from Dylan.

Dylan and Owen continued to trade blows. Both weapons fought with their powers, Owen combining his attacks with his physical weapons. Their chests heaved as they panted. Neither had had a fight that required this much strength in nearly a decade. “Isn’t this lovely,” Owen said as he tossed a bent knife to the side before drawing another, “two of the most powerful beings in the world set to destroy one another.” He glanced over his shoulder at Halle. “Perhaps she will join our ranks soon.”

Hold on, sweetheart. I won’t let him hurt you. “Owen,” Dylan said as he raised his fist once more, “it doesn’t have to be this way. If you agree to stop, if you agree to come willingly—“

“You’ll what, kill me quickly? I’m not going to do that.” Owen released a large pulse of energy at Dylan. It missed Dylan by a wide margin, blasting a large hole in the wall behind him. Shouts of pain and alarm rang out.

Dylan gritted his teeth. His side pinched. He could feel blood leaking through his shirt and making his side slick. He didn’t dare check the wound. It doesn’t matter. It is minor. Minor pain. I have had worse. I need to stop him. I need to stop him from destroying everything. He knew he was burning through his vast reserve of energy. But most of all, Dylan hated the loss of innocent human life. “Do you care so little for your minions you would kill them to hurt me?”

Owen smirked. “Yes, wouldn’t you?” Owen sent another energy blast at the wall, vaporizing the scattering men. “That’s what they are for. They are weak. We are strong. We can destroy everything.”

“You cannot do this, Owen. You cannot destroy everything. Think of what we could rebuild. Think of all the lives we could save.” Please. Please don’t make me do this. I…I don’t want to. Dylan realized with a pang of guilt. As much as he hated what Owen had done, as much as he hated the destruction and waste of life, he didn’t hate Owen. And killing Owen would kill a part of him. Please, we were friends once. We can still be friends. Please, don’t make me kill you.

“I can. And I will. Because I can. And because I want to.” Owen lunged towards Dylan again, his knife flashing bright. Dylan easily dodged Owen’s attack once more, but realized his mistake when Owen charged towards Halle.

“No!” Dylan surged forward, realizing too late, this was exactly what Owen wanted. Owen stabbed the knife up and into Dylan’s gut, burying it to the hilt. Dylan tried to breathe through the pain as Owen rode his body to the ground.

“Like I said, Dylan,” Owen ripped the knife up and through Dylan’s body until he hit bone. Dylan gasped through the pain, “so predictable.”

“Owen,” Dylan hissed as he felt Owen rip the knife from his gut. “Owen, please,” he said. “Owen, ahh—“ Dylan cried out as Owen shoved his hand into the wound. His world whited out with pain as Owen wormed his fingers into the wound on his side.

“There, that’s it. Yes, you are where I always planned for you to be, Dylan.” Owen’s face was inches from Dylan’s. “I have been waiting for this moment.”

“Owen, I’m sorry,” Dylan whispered. I cannot let you do this. I cannot let you win. If you win, the world burns. If you win, she dies. I cannot let that happen.

Owen froze. “What are you sorry for? Wounding me?” Owen wriggled his fingers deeper into the wound. Dylan cried out with pain. “What’s the best way and only surefire way to kill a weapon?”

Dylan gritted his teeth. I don’t want to do this. But you are leaving me no choice. Please, Owen. “Owen—“

“That’s right, you destroy the heart. A head shot will probably kill them, but not always. But the heart? The heart is the only way. I’m going to rip your heart apart, Dylan. And then I’m going to wake up your love so she can see your corpse as I turn her.” Owen twisted his arm, shoving it further into Dylan’s body. “I’ll reach your heart either through your belly or through your side. It doesn’t matter. I will have your heart. I will win.”

Destroy their heart. This is the only way. I’m sorry, Owen. I’m sorry this is what it came to. You left me no choice. “Killing me won’t bring them, any of them back. Killing me won’t bring her back.”

Owen froze. Dylan continued. “Killing me won’t change what happened. Killing me won’t bring—“

“You don’t get to say her name. You don’t get to say anything about any of them. And yes, killing you won’t bring them back. But it will make me happier.”

Dylan closed his eyes tight against the sting of tears. I am sorry. I am so sorry. I tried. You left me no other way. I would have found another way. You left me no choice, Owen. Dylan raised his shaking left hand to touch Owen’s chest as Owen tried to dig further and further, searching for Dylan’s heart. He didn’t even notice when Dylan touched his shredded shirt. “I am sorry,” Dylan whispered as he unleashed his power. “I am truly sorry, Owen,” he said to the red mist that filled the air.

You’re free now. Free from pain. Free from all of this. Free from suffering. I am sorry. Fare well, my friend. May the next life treat you better.

Dylan lay in the growing pool of blood for a moment longer, slowly trying to take stock of his injuries. He had worse pain. But he knew it had to be bad. It didn’t matter. He had to get to Halle. Sweetheart. I’m coming. Hold on. I love you. I love you. I love you.

With a stifled howl of pain, Dylan rolled onto his uninjured side and slowly tried to stand up. He pressed his hand to his gut as he rose on shaking legs, gasping with pain as every muscle protested the movement. He couldn’t stop. He had to keep going. He took two tentative steps on shaking legs. Good enough. I can get us out of here. I’m coming, sweetheart. Hold on.

Halle lay where she had fallen after her head struck the wall. She hadn’t moved during his entire fight with Owen. Please, be ok. You have to be ok. Dylan stumbled over to Halle, collapsing to his knees, relieved to see she was alive.

“Sweetheart, I’ve got you,” Dylan said as he braced himself. Carefully Dylan lifted her, stumbling slightly as he tried to get his balance. Though Halle was petite, he struggled to carry her. He knew his wounds were much worse than he initially thought as he struggled to balance. “I’ll get us to the team. They’ll look after you. Just hold on.”

Halle hung limply in his arms, her limbs swaying with his staggering. The room spun around him. No. Just a bit farther. Just a bit longer. Dylan refused to give up, refused to let his body give out. She needs help. I have to get her to help. Hold on, sweetheart. I have you. I love you. I love you. I love you.

Dylan only managed to get a few steps before his legs gave out completely. He didn't have the energy to get back up, to carry her and go forward. “Oh,” he sighed. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Halle. I can’t. You’re going to have to walk out of here. I….I can’t carry you. “Sweetheart, I’m sorry. I…Please wake up soon. Please be ok.”

He held Halle tightly in his arms. He rubbed gentle circles on her back. Dark spots flecked his vision. He shook his head. Come on, sweetheart. You have to be ok. I am alive because you are alive.You have to be alive. I love you. I love you. I love you.

Tags: @beomsstudio @mousepaw @keeper-of-all-the-random-things @eyehartart @corbytheking

@seysposts @cosmic-butterflys @wormjerky @godnessofmagic

@daddyslittlestgirlll

@thatlittlefirestarter @defire @jthecalmone @shook-skull @sagencrafts

@theforeverdyingperson @bilightningwhumper @cryptid-potato @fox-fox234 @deepfriedpan

@4-err0r-4 @half-duck @bigmiki @amberconnverse636 @penguin4473-blog

@abbyreader23 @lateuplight @firelan @octafi @paingoes

@xo7-parad0x @whumpandcomfort @kazekunai @pedro-pedro-pedro-pedro-pe @soul-of-a-local-bard

@dragonkales @kitarajy-kari @carosbee @celestialsoyeon @knightinbatteredarmor

@kay-kayxb177 @alwaysjaywalking @decayanddie @demetercabingreen-thumb @never-enough-novels

@whump-a-bear-workshop @sizzlingtigerwerewolf @urmum-11 @bleepblooppop @rattypop

@lexiebiss-blog @whumplump @geozone430 @jumpywhumpywriter @hufflepuffwritingstuff2

@anightmarishwhump @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @st0rmm @ay5ksal @pepeniascat

[mrpibbleswildride]

hey sweethartfemme/puppycatfemme/femmesunbream/ earthfairyfemme whatever the fuck is back and going by bloodlustgf now jsyk 😭🙃 ik u have that thread u update

lol yeah ive gotten enough of these now to confirm it! if anybody who had this gross loser danger to our community blocked before (full thread here, used to go by sweethartfemme/earthfairyfemme/lesbunnyfemmebatdollyfemme/saturnfemme/dollheartedfemme/sunkissfemme/stemmefawn/femmesunbeam the list goes on 😭) for their absolutely vile actions before including but not limiting to racefaking, catfishing the butch they were dating for 2 months, catfishing using MULTIPLE girls photos who they did not have permission for, catfishing using a girls photos after she'd asked them to stop multiple times only to have her and all her friends blocked, catfishing using photos of that girl as a 14 YEAR OLD MINOR on her NSFW ACCOUNT next to posts talking about in depth r*pe fantasies and other kinks (again after this girl had already begged her to stop using her photos), sexualized this girls photos and talked about nsfw situations with them, said that their ex butch @ursaius deserved to be catfished and lied to bc hes white, impersonating @toothfairyfemme (pretending/telling people they were them, claiming to have the same first and last legal name, stealing photos, pretending to be mexican/filipino), pretending to be an adoptee from mexico, and gaslighting n harassing n sending sooo much hate to toothfairyfemme for speaking up about it. this person is dangerous and harmful to the butchfemme community and has shown no signs of maturing since they keep trying to hide this shit and act like it never happened ‼️‼️‼️

"a femme who's done nothing but apologize to the internet again and again over shit that was never that fucking serious to begin with"... right. bc were supposed to believe youve learned so much from ur actions and grown and changed when ur saying THAT. 💀 how tf are we supposed to take you seriously or believe you're changing when youve barely apologized to anybody and keep changing your names/spellings/blogs every other week to avoid accountability!!! any time this subject comes up u stil act like u are in the right here and everyone else has been harassing u for things so minor and small and u dont deserve any of this. to this day you are STILL telling ppl that all u did was "copy someones bio" when asked what u did wrong. like dont be shy tell ppl what really happened bc ACTUALLY PEOPLE ARE MAD AT U FOR POSTING PHOTOS OF A 14 YEAR OLD TO UR NSFW ACCOUNT AFTER SHE ASKED U NOT TO..... PPL ARE ALLOWED TO BE UPSET ABOUT THAT STILL like log the fuck off its over!!! 3 months going by while u double down on ur actions not being that big of a deal does not suddenly make everything fine and what u did ok 💀💀💀

ive said it before but ill say it again "making your whole personality about loving and PROTECTING butches after you catfished a butch you were dating with a strangers photos you were asked to stop using several times is fucking INSANE btw. not to mention a lot of those photos being of a literal 14 year old and being posted to your NSFW ACCOUNT. and catfishing several other minors as an adult for like 3 years. insane."

also so sick and twisted how theyre like "oh it was only two months of catfishing" as if ANY catfishing is okay and as if ursa hasnt said before PUBLICLY how that was one of their biggest fears and said he mentioned it to you multiple times. you took advantage of that poor butch!! receiving fallout for your nasty actions for longer than your relationship lasted means nothing when those actions were so beyond vile! not to mention everybody else you hurt and catfished for YEARS pretending to be other people... like we have LOST THE PLOT!!!

anyway if u had this person blocked before under their old usernames be sure to block again bc this is a NEW account! would recomend blocking because they change their username all the time. they are a master manipulator and are rlly good at hiding the truth and rewording what they did to make it seem like not that big of a deal. i think everybody who wants to avoid interacting with this person has a right to know that this new account is them. plz rb this if u can to help spread the word we cannot keep letting them get away w this 😭😭💜

[tzifron]

As disabled people around the world and as disabled diasporic Asian queers, we have been grieving heavily and finding as many ways we can to be in solidarity with Palestinians during the last 80 days of the genocide against Palestinian people. 

We want to get money and resources directly to Palestinians in Gaza, however, as many people know, the blockade has made it almost impossible to get cash and resources into Gaza. One way that is possible is getting people eSims. 

The Israeli Occupation Forces have attacked wifi and cellular service over and over again, which stops people from being able to get information, be in touch with their families to let them know they’re alive, and for people to get the word out about bombings and conditions in Gaza. The several times that Israel/the IOF cut off all wireless and cellular service have been chilling and also provided sites where harsh damage, murder and atrocities could occur without media coverage, period, and by the heroic young citizen journalists whose social media accounts are some of the only ways that accurate, up-to-date news has been getting out of Gaza. 

On October 29th, 2023, Egyptian writer and activist Mirna El Helbawi founded #ConnectingGaza to get eSims directly to people in Gaza, with updated information about which carrier is most needed. A few weeks later,  poet and organizer Jane Shi decided to sell her remaining “Immunocompromised people are worth protecting” stickers to raise funds for eSims as well as for Palestinian Youth Movement Toronto’s Community Defense Fund after her friend Divya Kaur (@soft.kaur) suggested fundraising for eSims with art and after her friend Vivian Ly and co-organizer at Masks4EastVan linked Mirna’s instructions in a group chat. Doing so was quick and easy, as her stickers were already listed on her Big Cartel page from when they were previously sold to fundraise for fires and floods impacting predominantly Indigenous families in so-called British Columbia. 

Like many others across her social media feed, Jane was floored when she saw that one of the eSims she purchased, which lasts 20 days and has unlimited data, was activated, meaning that it is currently being used to connect Palestinians in Gaza to the Internet. She excitedly sent the screenshot of the activated eSim to a bunch of her friends and community members, hoping to offer some respite against the high stress of protests, social media posts, and ongoing organizing. 

Amidst the onslaught of violence, criminalization of protest, egregious censorship, and grief, including for the assassination of English professor and poet Refaat Alareer, the small blue “Active” offered a glimmer of hope, however small, however inadequate. 

Poet Rasha Abdulhadi, a disabled, queer Palestinian Southerner, invites us to do everything in our power to refuse the genocide against Palestinian people and in so doing, encourages us to make connections between our struggles and theirs.  In their bio in The Offing and elsewhere, they share, “Wherever you are, whatever sand you can throw on the gears of genocide, do it now. If it’s a handful, throw it. If it’s a fingernail full, scrape it out and throw. Get in the way however you can. The elimination of the Palestinian people is not inevitable. We can refuse with our every breath and action. We must.” As disabled people we owe our disabled kin in Gaza to get in the way. 

In the spirit of many disability justice crowdfunds, like Stacey Park Milbern’s collective fundraiser to buy the Disability Justice Culture Club in 2019, we are organizing this disabled (and ally) crowdfund to buy a shit ton of eSims.  

Anything you can contribute helps. There is power in numbers. We know that as disabled/ sick/ ND/Deaf people we are often poor or broke, but we can pool our money to collectively make a big difference. We also know that there is a rich tradition of poor and working class people donating more than middle class and rich people in general, and of poor and working class disabled people sharing what we have as a form of collective access and solidarity. We also call on people with access to money and/or wealth to contribute as you can.

We are also looking for disabled orgs and collectives to connect with and move money and resources to as asked—we have listed some below. We also recognize that everyone in Gaza is now disabled due to the massive number of deaths, new disabilities, life-threatening illnesses and destruction of medical facilities going on. Such destruction also debilitates the land, water, and air, which will impact Palestinians and all surrounding life for generations to come. We owe our kin in Palestine to throw sand on the gears of genocide with our every breath. 

[palms-upturned]

I’d like to post about another fundraiser that’s very low on funds, for @rehamjarrah! Reham was vetted by Strawberry Seed Collective (strawberryseedcollective on instagram) and you can find her campaign on their master list, number 20. But like Alaa and Mahasem, Reham had troubles with her first gofundme campaign and had to launch a second, and the campaign linked on the SSC list is not the same one that she has linked here on her tumblr. To clear up any confusion, I reached out to Reham on her instagram account, which is followed by the strawberryseedcollective account, and she confirmed that she is the owner of the tumblr account, and the beneficiary of both gofundme campaigns!

Alt text: a tumblr DM conversation between myself and rehamjarrah. I said, "Hello my dear! I'm a bit confused, can you explain why the link on the strawberry seed collective list leads to a different campaign from the one on your tumblr?" Reham responds, "This one that I share on Tumblr was created when me beneficiary in the first campaign stopped wanting to be my beneficiary in the med way and we couldn't share it and get donations because there's no bank account linked to it so my friend Uldduz from UK created another one for me so we can get donations and at least buy food and other necessities. Then after two weeks my beneficiary created an new bank account and wanted to link it to my campaign again, so we agreed on to make the first campaign for evacuation expenses and the new one for food, clothes, water, wood for cooking and other necessities because we lost our jobs and spend all our savings in the past months of war. So, if you want to contact Uldduz that created me the second one and helped me a lot when they stopped my campaign to ensure from everything....I really don't mind." End alt text.

Alt text: a screenshot of Reham's instagram page, user reham_jarrah. Under her bio, where it displays followers you know, it says, "Followed by strawberryseedcollective." End alt text.

Alt text: an instagram DM conversation between myself and user reham_jarrah. I said, "Hello my friend, I hope you’re doing well. I’m palms-upturned from tumblr, and I was hoping you could send me a quick message here just to confirm that this account on tumblr is yours so that I can spread your campaign link 🙏" Reham responds, "Hello dear. Sorry I don't go online a lot because I have to walk 20 kilometers to get internet. Yes I am Reham and I'll check Tumblr now." End alt text.

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[awkward-tension-art]

Puppet on a String Chp.9 (Fives x Reader)

Chapter 8. Chapter 10.

Surgery

CW: Fives x Reader, Reader is a medical practitioner, angst, swearing, Death mention, Running from authorities, Mentions of dead characters, Inhibitor chip arc, Nala Se being cruel, Shaak Ti trying her best, lying, surgery, Fives stuns reader but its consensual, AZ-3 being a cutie, Kissing

Tag List (Thank you guys!): @notgonnaedit @spicydonut25 @bimboshaggy @amazonian-bae @tentakelspektakel

Fives shifted, groaning on the surgical bed. 

You rushed to his side, looking over your lover as he woke. He took a deep breath and moved to sit up. However, you put your hands on his chest and kept him down, “Easy, take it slow.” you murmured softly, “Take a second to orient yourself.” 

The ARC trooper nodded, blinking open his eyes. However, once it registered that you were next to him, he sat up quickly, “Mesh’la!” Without another second to waste, his arms were around you tightly. 

“Hi, love.” you responded, returning his hug. You wanted to stay like this forever. Wrapped up in each other's warm embrace.

Sadly, however, Fives let you go. He raised a hand to feel the fresh scar from the surgery, “Was…was it there?”

You nodded, and AZ-3 hovered over to raise the tumor encased in bio-glass. Once you had it in your hands, you explained everything you knew to Fives, “Yours is identical in structure and location in the brain.” You said, “But…something went wrong with Tup’s. A genetic mutation, I think.”

Your lover nodded, following along. He shifted, getting to his feet with your help, “So that means his breakdown is…isolated?”

“I’m…not sure.” you admitted. You were about to say something else, but AZ-3 interrupted you. 

“Now that we have removed your chip, we do not know what will happen to you.” the surgical droid stated. 

“So then I could snap too?” Fives jerked his head up to look at the droid.

“It is a possibility.” 

You frowned, “We don’t know that.”

The ARC trooper beside you didn’t look convinced, “But when we removed the chip from Tup, he…”

Tup’s death still hurt

“I am afraid you may die as well.” Was AZ-3’s blunt response. 

That's when you chimed in again, “It’s unlucky,” your hand went to Fives, “But we can never know. So far you're stable and coherent. All good signs.” 

Your lover rubbed his face in his hands, getting himself together, “I need to know if more clones than just Tup and I have these and when we were implanted with them.” His tone was resolute and determined. 

AZ-3 chimed in, “My analysis suggests implantation took place at the earliest stage of development, most likely when you and Tup were only embryos.” the little droid hovered up and down as he explained.

“Then we have to start there.” Fives nodded, but before he could leave the surgical room, you squeezed his hand. 

“There’s one more thing. Shaak Ti knows that we’re investigating.” you informed him, “She wanted you to know not to panic if you see her, or if she finds us. She’s on our side.” 

He nodded, giving a relieved smile, “Good. Still, we should be careful. We don’t know who is on Nala Se’s side here.” 

With a peck on his lips and a nod, you exited the room first. Fives followed you, helmet on and rifle in hand. Behind the both of you, was AZ-3. The ever loyal droid apparently wanted to see this to the end. 

You knew where the embryos were located. They were growing in the Development Wing of Tipoca City. 

Getting there was easy. You passed through some near empty hallways, and AZ-3 was able to get you access to locked doors. 

The last door was a lecture hall. Cadets filled every seat and the silence indicated they were in the middle of an exam. 

“Oh, great…” Fives sighed. 

“Just follow my lead.” You murmured, walking forward. You got the attention of the proctors overseeing the education of the cadets, “Ah, I don’t believe we’ve met.” you introduced yourself to them quietly, “Ethics Committee from the Grand Republic Medical Facility.” 

Your hand behind your back motioned for Fives and AZ-3 to get to the other side of the lecture hall.

“Ah yes, Doctor. We haven’t had the pleasure.” The Kaminoan on the left nodded to you, “The Ethics Committee usually doesn’t get involved with the education of the clones.” 

“Yes, well, a…pediatrician, Doctor Chalesia, back on Coruscant, was curious about the teaching plan.” You lied, feeling bad using one of your colleagues names for your own means, “I wanted to ask if you could send any notes or protocols to the committee.”

Behind the proctors, AZ-3 and Fives managed to get the door opened. Your lover looked back to you, and you nodded for him to keep going. 

“I would have to speak to Nala Se first, Doctor.” the Kaminoan responded, “If you want the teaching plan, you will have to ask her.” 

“Great! Understood. Thank you.” You gave a small, appreciative yet false smile, “Continue on with what you're doing.” Your steps were steady and collected through the lecture hall, doing your best to look natural and calm.

Once you were past the doors to the Embryo Development Hall, you breathed out in relief. Luckily, no one else except for Fives was inside. The room was spacious, with a gray metal ceiling and white tiles. Lined up neatly were massive machines, all holding tubes containing small, growing embryos inside.

The ARC trooper was already at one of the consoles connected to the unit containing the embryos. It hummed to life and twirled before lowering one of the tubes down to eye-level. The life inside was small, and by your estimation, was most likely a stage 1. 

AZ-3 was already processing the data when you got to his side, “I will now try a stage three embryo.” He stated, typing on the machine’s screen. It hummed again, before shifting and whirling around. After a second, and more hydraulics hissing, a large tube containing a fetus lowered to the console. 

There was a beep, and the screen lit up with a green light. 

“There it is.” your eyes widened. 

“Ah…try another.” The ARC trooper beside you commanded the droid. 

The process repeated, and just like the first, the second fetus lit up green. 

“Based on this data, I can calculate how many in this tree are altered.” AZ-3 was typing on the console again. You weren’t sure exactly what he did, but after his command, every single tube containing a stage 3 embryo lit up in the same blaring green light. 

That could only mean one thing…

“I can't believe it…” Fives breathed out.

Your eyes were wide, “They all have one.”

The door behind the two of you hissed open and the ARC trooper whirled around. His rifle was aimed and readied at the intruder, “Don’t move.”

Nala Se raised her long arms up to show she was unarmed, “Why are you doing this?” she asked, continuing to step towards you and Fives. 

“We know what you've done,” You answered, seething. 

The Kaminoan’s voice was flat as always, “What is it that you think I have done?” She got closer and once she stepped into range, your lover grabbed her.

“How do you explain this?” He growled, swinging Nala Se to stand in front of the console. His rifle was pointed up, right at her head.

“That is a structural inhibitor chip,” She responded, keeping her arms up, “which is supposed to prevent you from being aggressive, like your source, Jango Fett.”

“If it’s only supposed to suppress aggression, why hide it!?” You snapped, “Everyone who knew of its existence has been killed. Except for you, apparently.” 

“I can’t speak for why your colleagues have died,” Nala Se had her large eyes on you, “Jedi Master Syfo-Dias instructed us to implant them during your growth cycle.”

“The Jedi…?” Fives’ rifle was shaking slightly, “The Jedi had this done to us?” He sounded speechless. Even somewhat sad at such a revelation. 

The Jedi he served so loyally had tumors implanted in every clone?

But…Shaak Ti didn’t seem aware of the issue. Did she know?

“It is not uncommon to have inhibitors placed in a clone.” Nala Se said, looking back at Fives. 

You grabbed Tup’s sample and raised it to the Kaminoan scientist, “Well, this one had a mutation and failed.” you snapped, “Every single one of these tumors can do the same.”

“Up until this point, there has never been a problem.” The scientist continued to sound cold and detached. 

Fives huffed and hit Nala Se in the head with the barrel of his blaster, “Well, you have got a big problem now.”

Just as he spoke, the large doors opened again, Shaak Ti, along with several guards, sprinted inside, “Don't move!” She commanded, stopping just short of a few meters from you. Her lightsaber was pulled, and it burst to life, “Drop your weapon.”

“General Shaak Ti!” you were the one to explain first, “We know what's going on. We have evidence.”

At your words she calmed, lowering her lightsaber. She turned it off, killing the ray of energy. 

Met with her silence, you continued, “The Jedi instructed that inhibitor chips be implanted in the clones at birth, but Tup's malfunctioned,” Your words were hurried and panicked, hoping she’d believe you again. You were certain Fives having a gun pointed at the head scientist of Kamino wasn’t helping, but maybe she'll continue to be patient with you and listen, “That's what made him lose control.”

“Where is the evidence?” the General asked, eyes narrowed. 

“It’s right here.” you handed Tup’s sample back to AZ-3 and the droid hovered over to the Jedi. 

The little robot held up the sample so the togruta could see clearly, “As you can see, the chip taken from clone trooper Tup is black and necrotic, indicating a malfunction of some sort.”

Her lavender eyes roamed over the sample, “What caused the malfunction?” She then turned to you, looking for your expertise. 

“Most likely a genetic mutation.” You answered, “One we can’t possibly predict. It may happen again to another clone,” Your gaze was directly on the General, silently begging her to believe you, “These chips have to be removed, otherwise the entire Republic Army could be compromised.” 

“There is no proof of that. This is an isolated incident.” Nala Se snapped and for once, you thought you could hear panic, “Besides, when you removed trooper Tup's chip, he died.” 

Fives pushed the Kaminoan with his baster, “Well, that's not going to happen to the rest of us.” He snapped, “Because I removed mine.” 

“Here is clone trooper Fives' chip,” AZ-3 held up the second sample, bright pink and healthy, exactly the opposite of Tup’s, “As you can see, there is no sign of malfunction in either him or the chip.”

“And Fives doesn’t have any evidence of neurological symptoms.” You backed-up the surgical robot, “He’s entirely coherent. Still himself. Most likely removing the chip has no drawbacks.” 

Nala Se broke, and once again, you swear you recognized fear coming from her, “By removing your chip, you are a threat,” she turned from the ARC trooper to Shaak Ti, “Master Jedi, we must terminate this trooper immediately.”

Your lover's eyes widened, “I am not a piece of hardware!” he cried, and you could tell the stress had finally gotten to him, “I'm a living being!” He hit the Kaminoan with the blaster again. 

“You were created in our laboratories.” She retorted, glaring down at Fives like he was a pest, “You are Kaminoan property!”

“People aren’t property!” You seethed.

“The Doctor is correct.” The Jedi stepped forward, her words calming the situation instantly, “and he is a trooper of the Republic Army, he is not Kaminoan property.” She spat that last word like it was a vile swear. As if the very idea of calling a living being property sickened her. 

The head scientist addressed the General again, “That does not change the fact that he is a danger and must be terminated.”

Shaak Ti narrowed her eyes. She was unhappy at the very least. Infact, the togruta woman was on guard and tense, “I believe that's for me to decide.” She raised one hand and motioned for your lover to lower his gun, “Fives, you are coming with me to Coruscant. I think it's time you told your story to the Chancellor.”

You let out a relieved breath and smiled, looking at the ARC trooper. He shared your joy, brown eyes bright with both relief and happiness.

Of course, Nala Se argued, “Master Jedi, I beg you to reconsider!”

“The Chancellor wanted all the data on Tup to be sent to Coruscant.” the General stepped towards the both of you, she had a gentle hand on your shoulder, “We're sending the data, the tumor, and these two along with it.”

“Then I am going with you.” The Kaminoan stepped forward.

“No, Doctor Nala Se, that is unneeded.” Shaak Ti immediately shot her down. Before there was an argument, she spoke again, “We have one talented Doctor already.” Her hand squeezed your shoulder and she gave you a small grin, “You will remain here.”

“I can not allow that to happen.” 

“Why?” the togruta turned, facing her, “Is there something about these chips you know that we do not?” 

After a stretch of silence, Nala Se lowered her head, “No, Master Jedi. I am simply concerned about the operations here on Kamino. How this situation will affect us.” 

She’s lying. 

You knew she was lying, but you didn’t know how. So, you remained silent. 

When Shaak Ti turned, Fives spoke up finally, “Thank you for believing in us, General.”

She smirked and looked back, “I will tell you the same thing I told your mesh’la,” The Mando’a word sounded so natural from her lips, “It is not a matter of belief, It is simply the right thing to do.” At her words she faced forward, and began to walk away. 

You grabbed Fives hand, and leaned into him, smiling bright.

He laughed softly before raising a gloved hand to your cheek pulling you into a deep kiss.

[fountainpenguin]

Hi! So I read your fic that focused on preening from the POV of Sanderson, and I was curious about the thing mentioned there about pixies going off to start their own companies when they grow up and have their own kids - I haven’t read everything, granted, but I don’t think I saw anything about that in your pixie worldbuilding and it sounds interesting, so I’d love if you could elaborate! Also, what do you think Pixie world would look like after a generation or two of this?

Thanks for your interest! (Heads up for minor #ridspoilers related to Origin of the Pixies, 130 Reasons Why I'm Fairy Trash, and Devil's Backbone)

Useful Knowledge

- 130 Prompt #37 - "Grooming" - One-shot about Sanderson (who has separation anxiety) anxiously waiting for H.P. to call him in for their evening grooming / preening ritual - Gyne & drone mindset info - If you don't know what gynes are, my replies won't make much sense. - List of Gen 2 Pixies - I namedrop pixies below. Not required, but it may be useful to have their numbers and vague details - Vice President Longwood's bio & main blog tag - Not required to understand this post, but there are some interesting old posts like "How do other pixies view the Longwood vs Sanderson rivalry?" & "What is Longwood's leadership style?" - It's also helpful to know what Wolbachia pipientis is, but the only thing you really need to know is that Pixies reproduce asexually when they come of age, whether they want to or not.

Background

"I was curious about the thing mentioned there about pixies going off to start their own companies when they grow up and have their own kids [...] so I’d love if you could elaborate!"

Aside from Sanderson giving sneak peeks of what he knows of H.P.'s plans in "Grooming" (and occasional other glimpses into his mind), we actually don't get to this part of the lore until Arc 4 of 130 Reasons Why I'm Fairy Trash.

For reference, I'm looking at the 130 summaries page and the next 'fic I post will kick off Arc 3, so it'll be a while.

Where we are in modern times (i.e. Timmy's time period), H.P. is down to his last offspring before his Wolbachia-forced fertility fades out- that's why Finley and Southmark - his final two children - are born tomtes: i.e., Fae without magic. Like a printer, he ran out of ink.

Art from the Eclipse House roommates post - Sammy, Poof, Foop, Finley

Coincidentally, Sanderson's Wolbachia-forced fertility kicks on right around the time, as he had come into adulthood and his body finished setting up everything it needed to inside him.

Those who've been around a while probably know exactly who Sanderson's first clone offspring is... Who's that pixie?

Art from the 2019 music meme post

It's... Cavatina Sanderson!

He's our cover image character for the Gray Train story arc and made his first in-story appearance as a teen (at Goldie's coronation) in "All I Ever Wanted." He is hands-down my favorite FOP OC, whom I've had since 2016 but have said little about since we've not reached his arc, and I love him very much.

Let's talk about companies, logos, some things we can expect from Vice President Longwood and Chief Pixie Smith, and a little about Cavatina... without getting TOO spoilery, of course.

Companies and Business

I can't say much, but I can confirm Sanderson opens a music store after becoming a dad and Cavatina often hangs out with him there.

The music store means a lot to Sanderson as it's the only place that's truly his (seeing as he shares an apartment with Hawkins, Longwood, and Wilcox for most of his life).

The funny thing about Cavatina is that he also likes tagging around after H.P., so you can imagine what that looks like. Duckling instinct strikes again...

Company Logos

A group of pixies can be called a company- not every pixie needs to run a business, but they're identified by special marks that organize them in family groups... Well, companies in a culture that doesn't like acknowledging family connections.

In other words, pixies have tattoos on their wrists that identify them despite being otherwise identical. These are Sanderson's:

From this post

These marks are called logos and are tattooed on the undersides of Sanderson’s wrists- He's Pixie 002 in H.P.’s company (left wrist) and Pixie 001 of his own company (right wrist).

Sanderson’s offspring have his logo tattooed on the undersides of their left wrists; they do not have H.P.’s logo at all. When they're old enough for their own company, they'll add their logo to their right wrist and their offspring will have that same logo on left wrist, so on and so forth.

While forcibly tattooing little kids may sound cruel... There is a good reason for it. DNA tests are absolutely useless in Pixie World because pixies are genetically identical. Every pixie is, technically, the child of Ambrosine and Solara- H.P.'s parents (which is why all pixies are tied to the same yoo-doo doll). Their pheromones vary slightly, but brand marks are the only reliable way to identify who a pixie is.

Worldbuilding detail- Fae heal quickly, but washing injuries (like tattoo pinpricks) in rosewater will prevent them from healing. Sanderson vaguely alludes to this in "Grooming."

H.P. had 507 (surviving) offspring, and he began reproducing when he was 491,536 years old. He was the first pixie infected with Wolbachia. H.P. wasn't born with Wolbachia- he was only infected late in life (human equivalent of 43). His offspring are born every time he would be coming into heat if non-infected, so his offspring are 500 years apart (give or take a year, with rare exceptions).

But Gen 2 (H.P.'s offspring) were born with Wolbachia, so they start reproducing shortly after adulthood (human equivalent of 22 or 23, give or take for the individual).

And there are a LOT of pixies coming into age around that time. Which is a huge population concern.

Near the end of my "7 Billion Years in 15,000 Words" post, I mentioned that after Foop makes the connection between royal jelly and gynes, that news gets out. Fairy parents experiment with feeding jelly to their kids, leading to a boom of gynes in the cloudlands (Playing into that culture of gynes being viewed "more attractive" and "smarter" and "more desirable kids" than drones... Obviously all social stereotypes, but that's the unfortunate way of the world). That has a lot of problems in its own- Most notably, the fact that dominance instincts set gynes up to fight to the death and now there are a lot of them in Fairy World. -> Foop actually... did not want that news to go public. For all his faults, he's very thoughtful and meticulous and he wanted to think over his discovery before people knew about it. It's devastating to him and he carries the emotional burden of his research for a long time. Specifically, I said in that post that there aren't enough fairy drones to go around since many drakes developed into gynes, so a lot of them would probably seek the pixies, thus luring them out of Pixie World and integrating them more into Fairy World I still think that's the most likely fate. There are simply too many pixies for Pixie World to thrive with an exponentially increasing population in a very small space.

Where Are We Going?

"Also, what do you think Pixie world would look like after a generation or two of this?"

I really like the Pixie expansion plot I have going on. H.P. is a gyne, and as his few gyne offspring grow older, the smart move is to separate them so they won't kill each other (or him). The vibe here is "princess" bees going off to be queens of their own colony, which is fairly accurate to a real bee or wasp hive, which I like.

Longwood Mayfleet was H.P.'s first gyne offspring and is due to take over Pixies Inc. after H.P. (and even become Head Pixie II someday).

That's all well and good, but that still leaves us with a handful of other gynes who need to go somewhere. Most famously, we have Darius Smith- The next oldest gyne after Longwood.

Who is Smith?

Smith is always butting heads with H.P., to the point that he's not even allowed inside Pixies Inc. most of the time. He oversees the warehouses and cloudships.

I also have a pheromone post scheduled for Sunday on the sideblog that discusses Smith's unique pheromones. Check that out for bonus info.

Smith's a really interesting character to me. He wasn't old enough to fight in the War of the Angels, so he's actually in charge of Pixie World during that whole arc (and comes into his adult wings during that time, his biology kicking in early since he was forced to take the reins young. It's a wonder he didn't start reproducing as soon as he became the dominant one...

Although he gives control back to H.P. (reluctantly) when he returns from war, this brief stint at running Pixie World really gets to Smith and his instincts... which is why he has a whole takeover plot later on where he chases H.P. out and takes control. Here's an upcoming scene I think is funny (and tells you everything you need to know about the H.P.-Smith dynamic):

While I lingered on the fringes of Pixie society, Smith struggled beneath a mountain of papers and politics. The Anti-Coppertalon dynasty fell six days after Commelina’s birth, and First General Anti-Cosmo rose to take the High Count seat. Good on him. Smith had a hundred questions, and Emery relayed messages between us as a neutral party. I responded to each one in the same flat way: “You’re in charge. Figure it out. Maintain the professional brand image I spent your life building up. Don’t be dumb.” But by Lugh’s spear, were they on a massive time crunch to plow through all that paperwork. According to Da Rules, midnight wasn’t to fall on the Lia Fáil while a major position of power lay vacant. Emery said Smith pulled every pixie together in the food court and had a job that normally would have taken a week (minus procrastinating) finished in hardly four hours. “Good boy,” I said when Emery told me, sitting in my rocking chair with Commelina dozing in my arms. “Good boy.”

Origin of the Pixies - "The Fading of Light"

"Queen bee" pixie raising his own successor who wants to kill him and being so proud of him for almost doing so, my beloved...

Shout-out to what this does to Anti-Cosmo's backstory in Frayed Knots, where A.C. is going through one of the most intense things he's ever faced, but can't turn to H.P. for support.

So, that's Smith... Smith's two largest roles in the Prompts are in "Dignity" - where he's married off against his will (Mid Arc 3) - and "The Other One," where he's preparing to leave Pixie World (Arc 3's finale).

Fun Fact! I've had that Prompt's announcement in my queue for 6 years... Not my drafts. My queue:

I might redraw it when we get there, I might not, but... There's Smith!

So... What's going on with Smith? What's up with these hoops he's jumping through?

Smith is being set up to become the first Chief Pixie- a CEO of a subsidiary company outside Pixie World (Not counting Wish Fixers, which has been in H.P.'s family for generations).

Specifically, Smith will be running PixieCo in Hawthorn Haven: the cloudland colony that surrounds Planet Delk.

Sound familiar? If so, good eyes... We'll talk about it more later.

The thing about gynes is that only one can be dominant in the area at a time. They're eusocial insect people and their pheromones suppress other gynes' ability to reproduce.

Leaving Pixie World for Hawthorn Haven means Smith will become dominant and gain the ability to reproduce (thus making it useful to have a partner to help him raise kids, despite Smith's reluctance to marry).

We get some really interesting scenes because of that-

“It’s amazing to think I’m going to be the dominant gyne around, with my own drones to look after. And even more amazing to think that since I’ll be both dominant and of age, I’ll start reproducing within the decade. H.P. will be getting grandnymphs after all. Long-lasting ones, I hope.” Sanderson said nothing. As Smith straightened up with the box in his arms, he glanced over his shoulder. “Am I treading on your turf a bit, Mr. Firstborn?” Sanderson leaned his hands against the counter behind him, his fingers curling over the front edge. “Not necessarily. After all, I did beat you by a long shot.” “Human children don’t count,” Smith argued, bending to grab a folder that had slipped to the floor. He almost felt the asterisk fizzle into existence over his head. Wait… Turning back, he found Sanderson still leaning in the same position, now with his tongue pressing against the inside of his cheek. “Oh. You weren’t talking about humans.” “No.” Sanderson took a coffee cup from the stack and held it beneath the nozzle for grape soda. With his thumb, he pressed the lever. Cool purple liquid splashed against the sides. “It hasn’t been confirmed professionally, but I’ve watched how H.P. handles himself during pregnancy long enough to feel comfortable admitting it.” Smith’s wings quivered for a single jealous beat, then stopped. “I assume you’ve told him.” Sanderson’s eyes rolled above his shades. “You know the boss. If a bus rolls into town, he wants to be the first one to board it. If he attends a funeral, he wants to be the murderer. If one of his friends is expecting, he wants to be the father. He’s been so busy marketing PixieCo lately. With the official public reveal coming up, he’ll be furious if I steal all the attention. I’m waiting for the right time.”

"The Other One"

And that's where we kick off Arc 4!

Cavatina Mentions

Cavatina is one of the most notable things about the time period you're asking about- Pixies growing up to have kids - and he's also the reason I haven't shared much about this era.

I still won't share much because I've waited this long and I'm not spilling the details now, but I can compile some things we know about Cavatina into one place, and you can start putting the pieces together from there.

Keep in mind that 130 Reasons Why I'm Fairy Trash is ongoing. You don't have all the info, but this is what you do have:

- His full name is Cavatina Klangfarbenmelodie Sanderson. He's Sanderson's firstborn son. - He wears a green dragonfly pin, and has done so ever since he was a little kid. - In "You'll Never Know," Foop claims the Pixies don't trust him anymore, but "compared to what the Head Anti-Pixie did, he's a saint." - In "You'll Never Know," Foop claims Cavatina is selectively mute and that it disturbs him Anti-Cavatina doesn't chatter constantly, implying Cavatina didn't get quiet until sometime after his counterpart was born. - In "Shadow," Foop's alternate personality (Hiccup) faced pressure to speak about Cavatina. Among other things, he hints Foop "misused pottery tools" in a past encounter with Cavatina. He also hinted Foop "meets Cavatina's parents" every time there's a Council meeting. - Foop seems to be very paranoid about Cavatina, as he spent his time before the school dance in "Approval" searching everywhere for him. - Cavatina appeared in "All I Ever Wanted." Poof claimed he was "twice as buff [as Poof]," "bad at small talk," and noted that Cavatina's dragonfly pin "made him famous." Most notably, Cavatina claimed he'd have Poof's head on a silver platter 5 years from that point, which Poof laughed off. - According to Anti-Coriander's sideblog bio, she and Foop first meet at the Autumn Masquerade. Foop's commentary in "Approval" confirms Cavatina attacked Poof there. - Apparently, Cavatina has a squirrel familiar (a familiar being a witch who finished mortal life and is now an animal body piloted by witch magic). -> We know Foop has Denzel and Kevin as his familiars... Who do I know is a witch, associated with pixies, and possibly associated with squirrels?

Do with this info what you will.

I picked up my draft for "In Confidence" earlier this week, hoping to post it soon, but it's one of those weird timeline pieces that makes me hesitate. I'm not sure readers have enough context to make it hit yet. I might post it soon, I might not, but Cavatina and Poof both appear as small children (joining Mama Cosma and Sanderson at a dinner event), which is a pretty interesting dynamic.

I showed more sneak-peek scenes of Cavatina in that link, so... browse that "In Confidence" blog tag if you wish, but do so knowing those haven't been posted on FFN / AO3 yet.

What is Devil's Backbone?

Devil's Backbone is my far future ‘fic that picks up immediately following the 130 Prompt “Reality Doesn’t Work that Way” (the 2nd to last Prompt of the series- 130 Sums page).

It heavily focuses on Pixie World as well as things going on with the von Strangle family and the quest to find a successor... plus the closing of drama in the Celebrity Kids (Lavender Train) arc that we haven't gotten to yet.

Unless I decide to write one more closing ‘fic after this one, this is the finale of my Cloudlands AU works, so its target audience is readers who have read all the other Cloudlands AU pieces, as it brings multiple storylines together.

It has a complete outline, but one that can be shifted if I change plot points. My intention is to write a decent-sized multi-chapter - maybe 12 to 16 chapters. We'll see! It's possible I'll condense it (or split some of the scenes off into one-shots) depending on what feels right when we get there.

This story takes place during an era where there are many pixies and a new Head Pixie is in charge of Pixies Inc. It covers the plot points I mentioned earlier about the population boom and some next gen characters, many of whom are pixies.

One of our most important characters is Longwood's son, Blackwood Longwood, whom I do not have art of. I checked my drafts, but I don't have any scenes I can share that aren't full of spoilers, so... Just know that he exists, I guess.

Blackwood is a very hard worker and I think he's cute. He has a strong sense of wanting to do what's right and wanting to protect others. He's pretty emotional for a pixie, but it's underlaid with cold logical expectations... He's very "We have to do this because it's the right thing to do even if it hurts, but I know it hurts, so I'll be right there with you." I hope you guys like him.

Like Cavatina, I designed him in 2016 and even wrote the ending scene of Devil's Backbone back then, as Blackwood is our very pivotal guy and lives up to his main character position there.

You may have guessed it from the hints above, but Cavatina starts out as a sharp, friendly, and humble kid, quickly consumed by a thirst for revenge... Justice is everything to Cavatina. From the released info, it's not yet clear what seemingly justifies this level of vitriol, though I'm always open to hearing guesses. In contrast, Blackwood is stoic... Pursuing dreams of honor, justice, and duty. They're really fun to use together in a world that's seeing pixie families for the first time and doesn't know what to make of them. Blackwood will probably have been an OC of mine for over 10 years by the time you guys see him... idk how to feel about that. If anyone was wondering, yes I do get whiplashed every time I see the name Martin Blackwood cross my dash, but I only heard about that character in the last 1 or 2 years and I'm not changing this kid's name now, haha.

I'm not sure the 2016 ending will still be the ending of the actual 'fic, but there is definitely drama in Blackwood's character arc that I think is unique and fun. It's very tied to my lore and not something I'll ever get to repeat, so despite my hesitations that "oh, it might be weird, maybe people won't like it," I do think it's worth sharing as a story point. It's hyperspecific and I love it for that :)

Devil's Backbone plot points - including the finale moment - are actually foreshadowed several times in Origin of the Pixies and a couple other pieces. You probably won't catch them without the context of the 'fic itself, but kudos if you do!

So, that's an overview of things and that time period, and an explanation of why this lore about Pixie families comes really late in the timeline.

It's a tricky question to answer. "What will happen to the Pixies once H.P.'s strength and influence fade?" is probably the biggest "haunts the narrative" question in Cloudlands AU (and it's the big thing we're working up to), so it's inherently spoilery... but hopefully this is a satisfactory response.

Thanks for enjoying my work! :)

[nellasbookplanet]

Book recs: great, unique and creative worldbuilding in fantasy books

A note: this is very much a subjective list. I typically do not care much for historical medieval-esque settings (though seeing as I'm a big critical role fan, obviously there are exceptions), but rather prefer settings that mix up historical and modern, fantastical and scientific, and make up entirely new things and societal structures not based on our world.

Other book rec posts:

Really cool sci-fi worldbuilding

Mermaid books

Dark sapphic romances

Vampire books

Without further ado, let’s go!

The Unspoken name by A.K. Larkwood

Honestly there's so much going on in this one worldbuilding-wise that it's kind of hard to explain. Portals, flying ships, orcs, elves, creepy snake gods, cults, immortal evil mages who traumatize teens as their hobby. It's also very queer!

A Master of Djinn by P. Djèli Clark

Set in an alternate 1910's steampunk Cairo, where djinn and other creatures (among other things, creepy steampunk angels) live alongside humans. We get to follow an investigator as she races to catch a criminal using a powerful object to control djinn and stir unrest. Fantastically creative and fresh, and also features a buddy cop dynamic between two female leads as well as a sapphic romance.

Sunshine by Robin McKinley

Urban fantasy on a level of its own, where dangerous magic exists alongside humans. It keeps you guessing and much is left unexplained; if you want clear answers and explanations to everything you might be disappointed, but if you want a world that feels mysterious and dangerous and lived in you'll probably like it. It follows a baker who, after getting kidnapped by vampires, gets embroiled in a dangerous struggle.

Radiant (Towers Trilogy) by Karina Sumner-Smith

A strange mix of fantasy, sci-fi and post apocalyptic, Radiant follows a girl without magic in a world where magic is currency. Those with much of it live in magically floating towers, while everyone else scrambles to survive in the ruins of an old city left devastated from an unknown cataclysm. The setting is creepy and mysterious and leaves me itching as I want to dig for more. Also there are ghosts.

Three Parts Dead (Craft Sequence) by Max Gladstone

This is one of those books where you just kind of have to let go and go along as it throws you all over the place. I started reading it expecting an urban fantasy, but it is much more and wholly unique. It features a world where gods and magic are deeply enmeshed with society at large, and a base of much of its technology and progress. It doesn't quite feel historical, but also not modern, but rather like you took a fantastical world and let it develop naturally into its own contemporary era.

Strange the Dreamer (Strange the Dreamer duology) by Laini Taylor

One of my favorite things is when the mysteries of the world and how it works become part of the plot, with characters trying to figure out their own world. Strange the Dreamer is beautiful and complex and will hurt your heart. Personally I didn't care much for the central romance, but the wonderful characters, themes, mysteries and world make up for it.

The Dawnhounds by Sascha Stronach

Like Three Parts Dead, The Dawnhounds is a book where you just kind of have to let the story and the world wash over you. It skirts the line of scifi and fantasy, with a futuristic world of environmentally friendly mushroom houses and deadly fungi bio weapons next to literally god-given superpowers and near-immortality. It's really cool and unlike anything else I've ever read. Bonus: it’s also sapphic!

The Hundred Thousand Kingdoms (Inheritance Trilogy) by N.K. Jemisin

Another example of a world that feels wholly like its own organically developed thing, with societal structures developed around the magical aspects and a presence of gods and demi-gods, many of whom walk the streets and will smite you if you piss them off.

Dead Witch Walking (The Hollows series) by Kim Harrison

Okay, here we have an actual urban fantasy. While I got a bit worn out by the many, many love interests throughout the series, the worldbuilding is simply phenomenal and relies heavily on a well-developed alternate history. Basically, magical beings such as vampires, werewolves, elves, fairies, witches, etc, used to exist secretly alongside us, but when humanity delved into genetic research instead of the space race during the cold war, an engineered virus ended up wiping a good chunk of us out and the magical beings stepped in to stop us from going extinct. Now in the modern day, we co-exist but tensions remain. Our main character is a witch who, alongside her roommates (a vampire and a fairy) solve mysteries and crime and end up unveiling secrets about their world centuries in the making.

Elatsoe by Darcie Little Badger

Another urban fantasy, this one aimed at young adults and featuring indigenous mythology alongside creatures such as vampires and ghosts. We follow a young apache girl with the ability to raise ghosts as she works to solve the murder of her cousin.

Red Sister (Book of the Ancestor trilogy) by Mark Lawrence

Honestly, most of what I've read by Mark Lawrence so far could be featured on this list (special shoutout to his Broken Empire trilogy!). We follow a young girl training to become an assassin in a slowly dying world, where ice is overtaking the land and only a small band along its middle is habitable, kept alive by a mirror in the sky sharpening the dying sun's light. Question is, how long will this machine last, and what even is it? Very dark but very good.

The Fifth Season (The Broken Earth trilogy) by N.K. Jemisin

Listen, N.K. Jemisin gets to have two books on this list, okay, she is very good at what she does. In a world regularly torn apart by natural disasters, a big one finally strikes and society as we know it falls, leaving people floundering to survive in a post apocalyptic world, its secrets and past to be slowly revealed. We get to follow a mother as she races through this world to find and save her missing daughter.

The Spear Cuts Through Water by Simon Jimenez

AKA the book the killed me. Two boys travel throughout their land with the body of a god as her horrible, horrible children try to hunt them down. It's hard to explain more than that, but trust me when I say the narrative voice and literary techniques are incredibly unique in how they blend past and present, reality and story, lead and bystander. Truly an experience. Bonus: gay romance!

Wild Seed by Octavia Butler

Master of slightly fucked up romance, Octavia Butler knocks it out of the park in this story featuring two immortals struggling throughout the centuries. What do you do when there is only one other person remotely like you, and you simultaneously can't stand them and can't live without them? Apparently, you turn yourself into a dolphin for a while.

Birth of the Fire Bringer by Meredith Ann Pierce

Cards on the table, it has been a great many years since I actually read this, and just as many years spent meaning to read the sequels (I have a lot of stuff on my tbr okay, don’t judge me), but I do remember it making a great impact on me back in the day. Our main character is a unicorn! Fighting wyverns and gryphons! How cool is that!

Bonus AKA I haven’t read these yet but they seem really cool

The Surviving Sky by Kritika H. Rao

From Goodreads: This Hindu philosophy-inspired debut science fantasy follows a husband and wife racing to save their living city—and their troubled marriage—high above a jungle world besieged by cataclysmic storms.

High above a jungle-planet float the last refuges of humanity—plant-made civilizations held together by tradition, technology, and arcane science. In these living cities, architects are revered above anyone else. If not for their ability to psychically manipulate the architecture, the cities would plunge into the devastating earthrage storms below.

Clean Sweep by Ilona Andrews

Urban fantasy but the vampires are aliens? Sign me the fuck up

The Gaslight Dogs by Karin Lowachee

From Goodreads: At the edge of the known world, an ancient nomadic tribe faces a new enemy-an Empire fueled by technology and war.