#like what the fuck do u even do in ur lives other than politics and wars?? or fucking ppl???

[thatpurpledudetrey]

if feyre isnt brainwashed

[tkaulitzlvr]

HEYYY sorry if this is kinda long but ur my fav writer so i trust u w writing this 🤞

Could you write smth where tom used to be a player but he started dating the reader and seemed really loyal, but they go to a party together, their first party as a couple and when the reader leaves to go buy drinks she comes back to find tom sitting down with a bunch of girls, it looks like he’s flirting with them. sooo the reader gets really upset and walks all the way home thinking he’s cheating already even after only dating for like a month. tom follows her home, trying to explain himself and he eventually explains that he wasn’t cheating, he was trying to get away from all the girls politely, but was kinda trapped. the reader forgives him and it ends in smut or fluff or whatever u want.

SORRY ITS SO SPECIFIC LMAOOO

WHAT IT SEEMS - T. KAULITZ

synopsis: tom has finally managed to settle down with you, discarding his womanising ways. but, you see something that makes you think otherwise, tom desperate to explain himself to you, certain that you have got the wrong idea.

content: angst + fluff

a/n: love this idea, thank u so much for the request i hope u enjoy !! this is lowk ass tho i’m so sorry😭😭

“we really don’t have to go schatz, i know you don’t like these sorts of places.” tom repeats, standing in the frame of the bathroom door as i apply my make-up in the mirror. “we can stay here instead, i’ll get some snacks from the store, just me and you?”

he tries to reason with me, knowing that i’ve never been a party person. i hated large groups of people, not understanding the buzz that people got from drinking unsafe amounts of alcohol and fucking some random, the idea literally my worst nightmare. i preferred to stay inside and watch a movie, or bake something, finding comfort in familiarity, never described as an extroverted person.

tom however, was the complete opposite. he was a party animal, ending up at a different club every night, with a different girl between the sheets after he left. that is why our relationship was so unexpected, but it seems that tom had changed. he settled down, spending less and less time out at a random bar, instead spending his nights with me, soon realising that the party scene wasn’t something i enjoyed. at first, i was hesitant to believe that he had changed his ways completely, but, a month into our relationship, he has given me no reason to not trust him, this the reason why i am deciding to finally give in and go to just one party, tom having missed out for so long. but he is clearly confused by my change of heart, trying to remind me that he is more than okay with not going, growing to enjoy quiet nights at home.

“tom i’m fine. you haven’t been to a party in forever.” i start, blinking rhythmically as i apply my mascara, before moving backwards away from the mirror and turning to face him. “besides, i can’t stay locked up here forever. i have to live a little.”

he tilts his head, still uncertain despite my clear lack of hesitation. his lips purse together as he walks towards me, resting his hands on my hips. i can tell that he is questioning it, part of him missing the parties that he used to go to. but the new and sensible part of him, the part that is more prominent now, silently reminds himself of how much he has grown to love spending time with me and only me, coming to the conclusion that parties were never as fun as he had sometimes made them out to be, much preferring my company to getting shitfaced in some random club.

“there’s other ways to have fun besides getting wasted all the time. i like that about you. you don’t have to be drunk to have fun.” he says, kissing my forehead softly.

“i want to go.” i state, looking upwards at him, my eyes wide as i attempt to convince him to calm down a little.

“are you sure baby? i don’t want to force you into doing anything you’re uncomfortable with. you know i’d hate myself if you got there and didn’t like it. i’d much rather we-”

i cut him off by pressing my lips against his, sealing his over dramatic rambling with a short kiss. “i’ll be fine, okay?” i reassure him, my forehead against his.

he lets out a small smile, sighing heaving before speaking. “fine, get ready. but if you don’t like it, we’re leaving straight away. deal?”

i roll my eyes at his protectiveness, my heart melting at how much he cares. though it is a little frustrating, i can’t be mad at him, nodding my head slowly as a chuckle leaves my lips, my body turning back towards the mirror as i finish applying my make-up, my small crop top and tight skirt already on. tom walks behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist, letting his hands rest on my stomach, before resting his head in my neck, planting gentle kisses there as i finish the rest of my makeup, small giggles leaving my mouth when his lips touch a sensitive spot on my neck, or his hands gently squeeze my stomach and his fingers slightly tickle the skin. he smiles behind me, his eyes calm and half-lidded, dreads resting over his shoulders and draping onto mine as he slowly rocks us side to side, continuing to kiss my neck from behind until i am finally finished.

the walk to the club is short, tom’s hand staying clasped in mine as we wander through the darkened streets, few people and the occasional car driving by us. i prefer peaceful nights like this, time to admire the city, rather than being face first in the crowds that daytime brought along with them. tom is speaking about something random, a lazy smile tugging on my lips as i look upwards, not particularly focusing on what he is saying, instead admiring his features - eyes fixed on the way his brown eyes shine, occasional smile gracing his face as he speaks, tongue grazing against his lip piercing. i take in this rare moment, though to some it is simple, to me it is something to be treasured, happy to listen to whatever tom is saying, finding it adorable how he gets so into a conversation when it is about something he cares for.

my cold breath leaves my lips as i exhale, reminding me how bitter the weather is, despite the warmth that the jacket tom had insisted on letting me wear brings me. occasional laughter emits from our mouths, sharing pointless conversation, enjoying the simplicity of each other’s company, our content exchange soon cut off by the sound of overly-loud music, signalling that we have arrived.

the queue to get in is longer than i had expected, tom not phased by this as the bouncer seems to recognise him, flashing him a quick smile and letting the both of us in. it is completely packed, drunken bodies encircling my vision, this enough for me to become easily overwhelmed. tom realises this, bending downwards so that his voice can be heard over the loud music.

“you okay? we can leave if you don’t like it.” he squeezes my hand as he speaks, bringing me into his embrace, his hands now running up and down my arms.

i shake my head, not wanting to leave before i had even given the place a chance. i let out a small ‘i’m fine’ in response, tom nodding his head and leading me through the crowd, looking downwards at me every few seconds, his hand never leaving mine until we emerge, arriving at a smaller section cut off from the rest of the club, being what i assume as the VIP section. the staff there recognise tom like the bouncer had, letting him in as we find a couch and table unoccupied.

he flops onto it, spreading his legs and wrapping his arm around my shoulder as i sit beside him, his other resting on the back of the couch. he scans the area, his lips pursed, head lazily nodding to the beat of the music, fingers tapping against my shoulder.

“you okay?” he shouts over the music, looking over at me and planting a small kiss on my forehead, pulling me closer into his side.

i nod my head, pointing a finger over to the bar. “i think i’m gonna go get a drink. you want one?”

he seems hesitant to let me go, his face falling a little, seemingly surprised at my willingness to walk around alone. the place somehow seems to feel busier, the bar totally packed, scattered with glasses, some empty, some practically full. but i figure that if i want to put myself out there more, i can’t rely on tom to be by my side, wanting to do this small thing alone.

“you sure baby? i can come with you?” he asks, looking upwards and seeing how crowded it has become.

“i’ll be fine. you can see the bar from here anyways, it’s not like anything can happen.” i say, pointing out the direct view our table has to the bar. though it is a little far away, past the small crowd of people forming there, it is in our eye line, tom able to maintain a perfect view of me.

“okay, but i’m watching the whole time. if anything happens i’ll be right over.” he gives in, though i can tell by his tone he is still reluctant. despite this, i stand up, pulling my skirt down a little bit. “and get me a beer please schatz.”

his hand plants a small squeeze on my ass, my body whipping around to scold him, yet my eyes are met with that same infamous smirk, his tongue swiping across his bottom lip as i shake my head, a low chuckle escaping my lips. i walk over to the bar, reaching it successfully after pushing through a few wasted bodies. i turn around, squinting my eyes to try and spot tom, seeing that he is still alone, his own eyes searching to meet mine. he spots me, sending me a small smile and wave, his face visibly calming down once i am within his sight.

i turn back around towards the bar, resting my frame against the hard wood. a tall man comes towards me from the other side, nodding for me to order.

“a beer and a piña colada, thanks.” i say, pulling out a twenty dollar bill from my purse and pressing it flat against the table.

he nods, taking the money and starting to prepare the drinks. i awkwardly tap my fingers against the wood as i wait, the music seeming to get louder, leaving me with a pounding headache. my body is warm, unsure of whether it is the proximity of sweaty figures dancing around me, or the sweltering air, everything in the room feeling ten times closer than it would outside.

he places the drinks against the table, shooting me a small smile as i take them, returning the gesture and turning around. my eyes catch a small glimpse of tom from where i am stood, quickly doing a double take as i realise that he is not alone. from a distance, i can spot at least four girls, two at either side of him. he appears pretty content, a large grin from ear to ear as he engages in conversation, the girls way too close for my liking. they are practically up against him, wearing next to nothing, their bodies covered with dresses so skimpy i wouldn’t have bothered wearing anything at all.

he seems completely comfortable, the only difference in how he was sat before being that his hands had moved from either side of the couch, now resting in his lap. i can see him shake his head, that flirty smile never faltering. however i reach my breaking point when one girl leans closer, about to place her hand on his thigh. that’s when i lose it.

i storm towards the table, tom’s attention quickly turning to me as the eyes of the girls sat beside him all turn to me too, curious to see what has been able to divert his attention so easily. his face softens as he seems somewhat glad to see me, this only angering me more. one second, he is entertaining girls because i leave for a minute, then his eyes light up as i return, as if he hadn’t looked at them with that same grin i have seen way too many times before - all before we started dating. my jaw is clenched, eyes cold and harsh as i slam the drinks down onto the table, part of the liquid splashing out of the tall glass from the force.

“there’s your fucking drink, asshole.” i scoff, shaking my head and turning around, starting to find my way through the large crowd in the centre.

i can hear his voice behind me, constantly calling my name as he forces his way through the crowd, only a few steps behind me. i ignore his pleas, feeling like a complete idiot for believing that he had changed.

“get out of my fucking way!” i shout over the music, pushing the last few people out of my way, my eyes finally meeting the exit, leaving it quickly, tom still following me as he continues to be persistent, my name pouring from his lips every few seconds.

the night is even colder than it was when we had arrived, my entire body shivering once i emerge onto the empty street, the distorted blur of music no longer helping to drown out the sound of tom’s voice as it seems to get closer and closer. i continue to shrug him off, speeding up as my heels click across the pavement. my hands run up and down my arms in an attempt to warm myself up, now without the comfort of tom’s jacket to keep my temperature high, my small and tight outfit providing no warmth at all.

however, my fast steps are no longer enough to keep myself distanced from tom as i feel his hand on my shoulder, the strength of its hold causing me to stop in my tracks.

“jesus christ, baby, what the fuck?” he asks, out of breath, his chest heaving up and down as i face him, his eyes heavy and filled with confusion once he processes the hurt etched upon my face.

“don’t fucking touch me!” i scoff, roughly detaching my shoulder from his head, my eyes becoming glassy, both from the harshness of the wind and the reality that tom hadn’t ever changed his ways as i had thought. “just fuck off, you’ve done enough. and i actually thought you were different, how fucking naive can i be?”

i turn around, starting to walk away again. yet he speeds up, jogging and moving to stand in front of me, completely trapping me.

“baby, please it’s not what it looks like.” he pleads, his own expression now filled with desperation as he begs for me to hear him out, my mind set on what it had seen - no explanation able to change that.

“really? so i didn’t see those girls all over you?” i challenge, shaking my head as a sarcastic chuckle leaves my lips, in disbelief of how stupid he is making me out to be.

“you’re blowing this way out of proportion! you’ve got the complete wrong idea schatz.” he says, his own voice raising a little as he becomes frustrated.

“do you know how unbelievable you are? i should’ve known, i was never good enough to make you want to settle down.” the tears cascade down my cheeks, my teeth sinking into my lips as i quickly move around him, walking away once again.

but, he doesn’t accept my desire to leave, taking my hand and pulling me backwards, his eyes glossy with tears, his sudden display of emotion taking me by surprise.

“liebe, please can you just listen to me for a second?” he sighs, his voice wavering as he speaks. i stay silent, the tears pouring down my face, yet he takes my lack of response as a sign to continue. “they came over to me. i told them straight away that i wasn’t interested.”

i furrow my eyebrows, a mixture of guilt and disbelief taking over. one part of me feels terrible for not letting him explain, this whole thing my fault if he is telling the truth. but, the more infuriated side of me doesn’t believe him for a second, refusing to even consider that he brushed them off, tom never being the type to refuse a girl’s company. and it is this anger within me that acts out, cutting his explanation short.

“fucking bullshit. do you think i’m an idiot-”

he cuts me off, continuing to explain. despite my cold tone, he remains calm, taking my hands in his own, his eyes softly looking into mine as he speaks.

“i told them my girlfriend is here, and i’m not interested. they wouldn’t give in. i didn’t want to be rude, you know i’m not like that. but i didn’t let them do anything. didn’t you see how i was sitting? i’ve never had my arms closer to me in my life!”

he lets out a small laugh, trying to lighten the mood a little. but once he sees that i am in no mood to joke around, he shakes his head, straightening his expression before continuing.

“i was literally about to get up to come and find you, but then you came over. i get that it might’ve looked weird from far away, but i promise you.” he trails off, taking one step closer to me, reluctantly reaching upwards to gently graze his thumb across my cheek, applying a little more pressure once i accept his touch. “i promise you that i shut it down straight away. i want you and only you.”

both of his hands cup my face, his thumbs running comfortingly over the soft skin, his eyes scanning mine as he awaits my response, my mind working at a million miles per minute as i try to find the right words. though i am still angry, now more at the girls than him, it is impossible to ignore the sincerity of his words, guilt rising within my stomach as i feel nothing but regret for not trusting him.

“i’m sorry.” i mutter, removing my eyes from his own as i stare at the ground, salty tears rolling down my face more than they had before.

“hey, hey…” he trails off, lifting my chin with his pointer finger, his face falling once he sees my state. he plants a soft kiss to my lips whilst his fingers wipe away the tears resting on my cheeks. i kiss back, his lips soft and warm, enough to calm me down instantly.

he pulls back, resting his arms on my lower waist as his forehead sits against mine.

“you can always trust me. i’d never, ever, cheat on you. i’m sorry for how i used to be, and if i could change it, i promise you that i would, in a heartbeat. i want to be better, for you. you mean more to me than anyone else in this world, and i want to show it. you just have to let me try. okay?”

his lips stay parted as his slightly ragged breathing fans against my face, his warmth contrasting with the harshness of the climate around us.

“okay.” i say, nodding my head. he brings his lips to mine, smiling into the kiss as i gladly reciprocate, feeling his hands bring me closer into him.

“come on, let’s get you home.” he says, pulling away and holding his hand out for me to take. i smile warmly, intertwining my fingers with his as he pulls me closer, kissing my forehead gently. we begin the short walk home, tom stopping after a few seconds. he pulls his jacket off, tugging it along his frame. he takes a sleeve, gently threading my arm through it, repeating his motion with my other arm, until the material completely submerges me, my body warming up almost instantly.

he smiles downwards at me, kissing my cheek quickly, noticing the way a loud yawn escapes my lips after he does so. he bends down, placing one arm behind my neck, the other scooping me upwards by my legs as he carries me bridal style, a surprised gasp leaving my mouth at his actions, however it soon turns into a loud giggle once he begins planting large kisses across my face. he is grinning from ear to ear, his heart warming at the happiness plastered on my face, his hold on me tightening as he places one last kiss to my nose.

his arms remain securely around me as he walks slowly, the rocking motion of his steps causing my eyes to feel heavy, my eyelids beginning to fall shut, on the verge of falling asleep. my breathing slows, close to slipping into unconsciousness, however tom’s low voice prevents me from doing so. he clearly thinks that i have fallen asleep, yet i hear the phrase pour from his lips as clear as day.

“i love you.”

requests are open! keep sending them in, there’s a lot in my inbox atm but i’ll get to it as soon as i can!!

[yanderefarm]

Love Letter One (The Meta Version)

Dear Yanderefarm,

I LOVE EMIL HIS CHARACTER CONCEPT IS FANTASTIC. The idea of being in a hierarchy were you are a lower rank in the system, but a higher ranked individual basically scruffs you and sits you on top of that hierarchy bc they love you? Top Tier.

I also sincerely appreciate your total lack of specification regarding the time period Emil rules. In one story, there's a old timey merchants guild, but photographs also exist?? Peak. The ability to put him in scenarios where both magic and technology can exist is perfect, especially for horn contexts.

You want feminization? You can put him in a slutty dress but add magic and Bam! Tits and pussy to match, baby!

You want hypno or dumbification? Substitute a pocket watch for a magical artifact that drains the brain, or a sci-fi brainwashing visor that can lock unto his face!

You wanna punish him? Pick between a high tech fucking machine, or a good old time in the stocks being a free use toy! Maybe even both?

Pet play? Magic that bitch up some ears and a tail! (Bunny Boy Emil, Anyone?)

Anyways, the possibilities are endless, and that's a good part of why I like Emil so much. Another part is just his demeanor. Literally only Ajax has anywhere NEAR as much ego as Emil, and even then, Ajax gets nervous and flustered pretty easy once you starting coming on strong.

Emil though, Emil stays smug. He's got the ego, but he also knows and accepts the fact that he'd like nothing more than to service you all day every day. He enjoys being dommed, and while you can get him flustered and crying, it takes work; it takes effort.

That, or it takes nothing at all. And that dichotomy enraptures me . He's so proud, but he's on his knees for you in front of the whole court the second you ask. He's so vicious, but he can handle you so gently. He's so strong and stoic that it can make him brittle, prone to snapping. He's so egocentric that he thinks you'll never pick anyone else, but seeing other people around you makes him jealous.

Anyways, all this to say you write amazingly complex characters and I love them. Can't wait for the Season 2 Boys!

(P.S. Actual love letter to Emil himself coming soon)

-🎠 Anon

this is so sweet!!! ur so nice thank u 😘

if you like emil try: romantic fantasy manhwas bc you will immediately see that he borrows a lot of tropes from them. the mad tyrant thats actually a big softie for his wife is an entire trope itself.

im a big fan of the political drama in rofan manhwa like yes give me trade disagreements and noble factions vying for power and ridiculous crown prince nonsense. i know that if i had the will to write a whole novel with emil that it would chocked full of all the ramifications of marrying a lower stationed prince of a kingdom known for neutrality. the short term ramifications like homophobic old noblemen "you can't marry a boy what about your heir!!!" and more politically powerful female suitors who hate you for getting in the way of them grabbing more power. and the long term ramifications like your kingdom being forced against it's will to give up decades of neutrality with a king woefully unfit to be in charge and despises you for saving his life and the theocracy next door ready to knock down the doors and behead your husband for daring to claim some divine origin and blaspheme their God's name. this kind of thing lives in my brain rent free i love it.

also yeah!! its a fantasy world so time period accuracy is unimportant. i was going to have it be more accurate to a medieval time period but like. that's not fun. so i decided there's magic so you can have modern things but they're all just powered by magic. magic communicators, magic teleportation, magic cameras, magic aphrodisiacs.

honestly all of my work has a certain level of magical realism for the sake of horny. like aphrodisiacs and drugs don't really work the way i want them to but because i want them to work a certain way they do. surely if you actually did the things to achilles that are fun he would die but he doesn't because i don't want him to. like idc if it would probably kill a man irl its fun and horny so it doesn't.

emil's ego makes him so fun. like ajax wouldn't immediately proudly declare that he's the best dick sucker. emil would. he's proud and haughty. he's the greatest king. but being proud makes him more fragile because his heart is more weak. he falls in love much easier than he pretends to. like i love when his pride falls and he's just desperate to keep you close to him even if that means completely degrading and humiliating himself. he's cute.

im glad you like him so much he's really fun to write and i love his tropes

[brainmaniaman]

I have been scouring this fucking app for Julian fics, never really occurred to I can just request some lol.

So yeah, if you're up for it I've got a little plot/trope set up that'd id love to see. Outsider(fem)reader/julian.

Something along the lines of a reader moving into the park from the southern us, new to Canada and parks in general. As an outsider, Julian expected you to be trouble or judgemental, so he acts like a dick to you at first. Later on, he starts to see instead how kind you are to everyone, understanding and totally up for doing ppl favors even when there's nothing for you in the end. This makes him feel real guilty for bein an ass to you, and also makes him start to feel other things towards u.. Take the fic in whatever direction you'd I wanna see u work ur magic

( + no pressure 2 write it ofc!!)

pairing: julian/fem!reader fandom: trailer park boys tags: smut (cis man/cis woman), fluff, a bit of angst, idk this is one of my more normal ones, heavy plot some porn (i kind of felt more plot focused with this one), julian is kind of hung (he gives me big dick energy)  author's note: i'm much more of a ricky kinda guy myself but when i got this request, i got really fucking excited. i loved the idea. i will say, this fic isn't structured traditionally. it's very dialogue heavy and kind of leaves some things up to the imagination. i wanted to establish relationships between the reader and other people in the park as well as share some of julian's private conversations about her. i'm really proud of the way this has turned out, though i'm sorry if it's not the interpretation you might have been hoping for (i'm a little insecure about the way i interpret storylines). i hope you like it, though. i worked hard on it and i'm pretty sure it's the longest julian/reader fic currently on the internet so i'm going to take that fucking win rn. also, i actually live in the southern united states. (fun fact: i'm looking to move because i'm a trans man and life here is kind of ass if you're trans), so i gave the reader a backstory that's kind of unique to what a woman in 1999-2000 would have gone through. i'm not satisfied with the ending though, i'm sorry if this fic is a little lackluster, but we can only go up from here i guess. text blocking this shit was a fucking BITCH. word count: 6,442

everything i've ever let go of has claw marks on it.

The cultural climate of Sunnyvale Trailer Park wasn't exactly the most inviting. There were people who lived in the park and then there was everyone else. For the most part, newcomers never lasted more than a few weeks. The bottle kids drove away the weakest among them, but if those kids weren't effective usually Ricky's antics drove away the remaining lot. Sure, there were a few people here and there who moved in quietly, but those were usually the kind of people that minded their own business because lot rent was low enough for them to just ignore Lahey.

But in general, new people were not welcome. Especially know-it-all hipsters trying to live the simple life by casting away their possessions in an expensive storage unit and downsizing to a more humble trailer. Those were the kinds of guys that gave up quickly. Plus, new people threatened the balance of park politics. For the most part, Julian was well-liked and well-respected among the others due to his caring nature and dedication to his loved ones. He protected his own. And if there was one thing Julian didn't like, it was newcomers coming into the park without already knowing someone in it.

"Barb, I really think you should reconsider letting this girl in. I mean, you don't even know who she is." 

"Julian, this is a business, not a family estate. Her credit was just below decent, she has an okay-paying job, and paid three months of rent in advance. From a business perspective, she seems like she'll be a reliable tenant. It's a good thing you've grown close with your community, but you have to remember at the end of the day, this trailer park is here to make money. Whatever fit of paranoia you're suffering through, deal with it on your own time. Next time you come here with a complaint, make sure it's a business one." 

And just like that, Barb had shooed Julian off. What more could he say to that? Well, he had a lot more to say to that but she didn't want to listen. Every time he opened his mouth to speak, she only guided him further to the door. If Julian thought he was the one who ran this trailer park, he had another thing coming for him that's what. This dump needed more reliable tenants - normal folks who didn't like to get into trouble. Barb was trying to turn the park's image around.

"Julian, I just don't understand why you're so against this lady stayin' here. You know I'm no fan of newcomers myself, but she's been mindin' her own. She actually keeps her yard clean, which is pretty fuckin' nice if you ask me. It's nice to pass a yard that doesn't have a million fuckin' pieces of trash thrown all over the front. She even has one of those pink fuckin' yard flamingos in her yard. It's so bright and colorful. There ain't nothin' wrong with a little bit of color, Julian. Ain't nothin' wrong with a little bit of change." 

"Are you even listening to yourself talk Bubbles? Can you hear what you're saying? You're saying change for this park is good. Who knows what she believes in. She might hate dope growers, she may be workin' with Lahey, she could get nosy and bust us for dope and you know Ricky and I are growin' a lot of dope -" 

"- I know, I've seen that big fuckin' setup you got in that fuckin' trailer in that shitty little lot -" 

"- so then Bubbles you should know that new people aren't good. We can't trust new people, especially not now. Especially not when we're so close to selling them to those prison guards and retiring. A stranger could compromise the whole thing. Remember those bible scammers that came through here? I've learned my lesson since then and I'm not tryna repeat old mistakes." 

"Jesus Murphy Julian, you need to calm down. Those fuckin' assholes were obviously scammers, it's not like this lady is goin' door to door scammin' people." 

"Sure maybe she's not taking advanced orders on bibles Bubbles, but she is goin' in and out of everyone's house doin' favors for them. Why does she need to see the inside of everyone's house? Do you think she's lookin' for something?" 

"Have you ever stopped to think that maybe she's just a nice person doin' a nice thing? Nice people exist. You've been dealin' with dope and crime and jail so much that it's like you forgot how to trust someone. All you think about is dope and how you're going to protect it from everyone else." 

"You're only defendin' her because she brings you boxes of canned cat foods for your cats. She's buyin' you off and you don't even know it." 

"So what if she's helpin' me take care of my kitties? My kitties are the most important things to me and unlike you, she fuckin' knows that. If someone's offering to help take care of my precious little kitties, who the fuck am I to say no?" 

"Bubbles, look -" 

"No, no, nevermind." Bubbles tucks a gray cat further into his arms, his posture becoming more rigid. It's clear that he's done with the conversation, no longer interested in trying to hammer commonsense into Julian's brain. He couldn't see past his own paranoia and it was infuriating. In Julian's mind, everyone in the world was out to get him - even the nice lady across the street who helped his friend support his kitties. "You just don't get it, Julian. I'm goin' back home, come talk to me when you get it." 

Julian was still convinced he was right about this girl. If the bottle kids didn't run you out, he'd just take matters into his own hands. He didn't care whether or not Bubbles helped. Julian was a man of many connections, and even if he couldn't find someone else to get the job done he had no qualms with taking care of the situation himself.

"I mean, if you think that lady's dangerous then you know I'm gonna follow you Julian 'cause you got the brains and stuff behind the projector, but I just gotta let you know I'm still workin' on my grade ten so whatever idea you have you got to make sure it's not illegal 'cause I can't go back to jail, not right before Trinity's birthday. That means we can't do any property damage or breaking and entering or any shit like that." 

"I promise you Ricky we're not gonna go back to jail, we're just gonna annoy the shit out of her until she leaves. I was thinkin' maybe you and Cory and Trevor could host like a really loud party across the street tomorrow night, you know - something to keep her awake. If we get a noise complaint, we'll just shut it down, but then once the cops leave we'll start it back up again. We'll do this for a few nights until she finally decides to move out." 

"That's a pretty fucking good idea, that's smart. Plus, since it's a party we can get drunk and high."

It's 2 a.m. and that fucking party is still going. There were several times you considered calling in a noise complaint but you decided that it was a better idea to just wait it out. It had to end at some point and overall, it was never a good idea to get involved with parties like that because sometimes they got out of a hand, and you were too smart to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Though when you stepped outside to 'check your mailbox' - spy on the party still going on into the early hours of the morning - you find yourself tripping over something. You stumble onto your hands and knees and it's only when you pull yourself up do you really get a good look at the man passed out by your mailbox. It's Ricky, and he's mumbling things almost incoherently. He mutters something about dope, bitches, Trinity, more bitches, Lucy, and good booze. It's a pathetic way to be, but you can't help but feel bad for you.

You use the toe of your shoe to rock his face awake. Ricky sputters before waking up in a drunk panic. He's angry and yelling incoherently, but your promise of a hot shower and a hot sandwich satiates his anger. He struggles his way through a shower, though almost slips a few times. He eats hand to mouth, chewing loudly, and drunk conversation ensues. He shares a lot with you - stuff he probably wouldn't have shared sober. He eventually passes out, not remembering much in the morning. That morning you share breakfast and a little bit about each other. He tried to hate you, he really did, but you were charismatic in a friendly way. There weren't any ulterior motives, you just enjoyed conversation.

"I don't know Julian, she seems fine to me. I mean, she's not all that bad. Her yard is pretty clean and you know, she has that pink little flamingo in her yard and honestly it's pretty fuckin' cute. I mean yeah she's kinda annoying and I hate that fuckin' southern fuckin' cowboy accent she fucking has but whatever. I think you're gettin' worked up over nothin'. You've been so busy tryna push out this lady who hasn't done nothin' wrong to you while I'm over here slavin' away watchin' after these fuckin' dope plants and tryin' to study for my grade ten all while play peepin' tom spy guy on some poor fuckin' lady." 

"You're just saying that 'cause she let you spend the night and made you breakfast."

"You know what I sure as fuck I am! She made me breakfast and kept me from sleepin' on the fuckin' ground drunk as piss and let me use her shower and shit and I didn't even have to put out! It's not like I trust her or anything like that - I didn't talk about dope or nothin' like that at all." That was the truth. "It's just at this point anything is better than fucking Cory and Trevor. I'm not sayin' you gotta like her or trust her, but she's not all that bad Julian. Maybe if you actually got to fuckin' know her like I have you'd see that you're just being a paranoid dickbag." 

"You know what Ricky, you don't anything about her. You're just seeing what she wants you to see. But I'm smart, so I see right through it -" 

"Come on Julian don't be like that -" 

"- and since nobody is going to take care of this fucking situation then I guess I'll have to." 

Julian felt like everyone around him was failing him. Nobody else seemed to feel the same way he did about your existence in the trailer park. As each day passed, Julian grew more overtly snide. When approaching Ricky and Bubbles, Julian never took the time to acknowledge you. It was obvious that he was just being an ass, so you opted to ignore it, preferring not to fight. Silence was Julian's strongest weapon. But as the days ticked by, the tension between you and Julian only seemed to mount itself higher.

It's not like you inherently disliked Julian. In fact, you liked to believe that there was good in everyone and you prided yourself in your ability to be able to pull even the toughest people out of their shell. However, Julian was no easy project. Every time you tried to approach him, he simply brushed you off. You weren't even sure that the two of you had even exchanged any greetings. He hadn't even said hello. So when trying to talk to him didn't work, you simply tried to stay out of his way. This was frustrating for Julian because what he wanted you to do was to blow up and make it a big ordeal. But you didn't. You simply kept to yourself and resumed helping others around the park without complaints. 

There were times where Julian thought about approaching you in the way Julian thinks about approaching any pretty thing in a summer dress that talks to him. But he remains strong in the face of adversity. Gone were the days of chasing anything in a dress. He had a dope business to worry about.

But sometimes the thought would creep up onto Julian ever so slowly. Sometimes, he'd get this kind of fantasy in his head - especially on the Sunday afternoons you'd spend gently pushing yourself back and forth in your rocking chair, enjoying the summer sunlight. He could think of a million ways you two could enjoy the afternoon together, but he often pushed the thought out of his head. He had a park to protect. Friends to protect.

"You know, you have some real nerve comin' up here in this trailer park and putting on a show like you're doing." 

You look up from the rocking chair you were gently pushing yourself back and forth in and offer Julian a small smile.

"So you're Julian?"

Julian can't help but be a bit enamored with your slight southern drawl. It sounds like you're somewhere from the deep southern United States - one of those more rural provinces like Texas or Alabama. He can't quite pinpoint the accent, but he secretly finds it endearing.

"And how do you know that?" 

"I mean, with how much you do for the people here it's kind of hard not to know who you are. Plus, Ricky and Lucy both never seem to shut up about you. You know, if I didn't know any better I'd say they're both in love with you or something. Also, yesterday you came to pick up Ricky and he pointed right at you and said well, there's Julian, see ya later. I just put two and two together." 

"I'm not here to make small talk, (name)." 

"Then what are you here to do, Julian?" 

There's silence. What is he here to do. There wasn't anything that he could reasonably do and he wasn't the terrorizing type if he didn't have to be. Fuck, he had even promised that his greasy trouble-causing days were over. But here he was, standing at the edge of the patio stairs, contemplating whether or not he should threaten a woman.

"I'm just here to ask you about your intentions with Ricky, that's all." 

You can't help but laugh out loud at the comment. "Oh, please. There's nothing going on between us." 

Julian knows that because if there was something going on between you and Ricky, Ricky wouldn't shut up about it and the whole park would know. But he's trying to be covert about his intent to interrogate you.

"Yeah, well . . . there better not be . . . Ricky's a good guy and I'd really hate to see him get hurt . . ." 

"Why are you really here, Julian?" 

Julian stands in silence, thoughtfully cradling his glass in his hand as he tries to come up with a clever lie - but it's hard to think when he catches a glimpse of your thighs pressed together underneath your thin summer dress. He squints and then looks away briefly.

"I just wanted to stop by and tell you more about the culture of Sunnyvale. You know, we're really tight-knit. Like family."

"I know." 

"And you know, family protects family." 

"I know." 

"And you know, I'd do anything for my family." 

"I know." 

"Anything." 

"What are you getting at?" 

"I'm not getting at anything, (name). I'm just givin' you a little more info about our park, just trying to get acquainted with you." 

"Oh, you're trying to get acquainted with me? This is the first time I've spoken to you in the month I've been living here." 

"Well, you know, I was busy with the business I'm running -" 

"- that lawn mowing business you and Ricky got?" 

Is that what Ricky is calling it? "Yeah, we've had a lot of customers so I've been having to do a lot of bookwork to keep up with the business you know. But it's been busy, so I haven't had time to talk, but now I do and I want to get to know you." 

"You want to get to know me?" 

"That's what I just said isn't it?" 

"Well I'll tell you what Julian," You push the chair backwards in thought, looking up at the bright summer sky. The sun shines in your face, warming your skin. It's a nice feeling. "If you really want to get to know me, you'll come over for dinner tonight." 

Julian wasn't going to admit it but he was excited at the prospect of dinner. The last time he shared time - much less a meal - with a woman, she ended up stealing his dope plants and lying to him about being in love. In all fairness, most people would have been wary of someone saying I love you within the first week of getting to know them, but Julian (for the most part) was a hopeless romantic. He liked the idea of a life with someone else. 

Julian told himself that this was strictly business - that he was here to set the record straight. This wasn't get-to-know-you dinner, this wasn't a date. He was just here to let you know that he wasn't going to tolerate funny business. He just happened to be wearing his nicest clean black shirt and he just happened to be wearing one of his nicer pair of jeans - the ones that didn't have the holes in them. Julian knocks on your door. The two minutes he waits for you to answer feels like an eternity but when you open the door, he's glad he's waited. 

"You got a hot date you're going to after this?" 

"What, this?" You look down at the pink summer dress you're wearing, "This is casual." You had always been the more feminine type, enjoying softer clothes and pretty dresses. Plus, unlike jeans dresses were more comfortable. You usher him inside and he obliges, being careful to not spill his drink when he steps in. 

"Dinner is served." Dinner being a massive fucking bowl of macaroni and cheese with cheap ass hot dogs. "Sorry it's not exactly the best, but -"

"It's fine, don't worry about it." Julian sets his glass down. He's actually ecstatic. Macaroni and cheese and fucking hotdogs? "You know, I don't know where you're from but around here this is a five-star meal." 

You give a dry laugh. as Julian picks up his fork to eat. "You'll have to forgive me, I'm kind of new to the whole trailer park life and the whole being poor thing." 

"Oh yeah? Where are you from?" 

"Southern United States." 

"What state?" 

"Texas." 

"That's a long way from here, basically on the other side of the continent. Why'd you come up this way?" Julian tells himself that he's not trying to get to know you because he's interested in you - he's trying to get to know you to get dirt on you, to know what he's up against. 

"I needed an abortion." You answer dryly, "And even though it's been legal for some years now, no physician was wiling to perform one on me." 

"Why come to Nova Scotia? Why not just go to another state?" 

"Well, I figured things were just better here than they were there. Don't get me wrong, it's not perfect by any means but it's better than where I was from. At least here I know if I need the service again, it's a little more reliably accessible. Plus, it's not like I had anywhere or anyone I could turn to. So I just kind of . . . stayed." 

"Heavy stuff." Julian sets down his fork, "Didn't have any family to turn to?" 

"No, and even if I did they're not the kind of people I'd want to be around." 

Julian could relate to that.

"So you just came to Canada for an abortion and then decided to stay? You know, when Americans come to Canada they want to go to Quebec. Nova Scotia isn't exactly on the top of the list, let alone Dartmouth. Let alone fucking Sunnyvale Trailer Park. Nobody just moves in here. Come on, (name) . . . what's the real reason why you're staying here?" 

Your mouth runs dry as you consider answering him honestly. "Well, uh . . . you know . . ." You twiddle your thumbs a bit, "I came to Canada with my passport and got my abortion and then . . . I just uh . . ." There's a long pause as your appetite disappears completely. "I didn't have anywhere to go to so I just . . . never left . . . this place was the only place that'd rent to an illegal resident . . ." 

"Holy fuck you don't have your papers?" Julian wasn't sure what kind of story he was expecting but it wasn't that. Now he feels like an asshole. "How did you get a job? How did you even afford this place?" 

"Well, I had some savings so that was a good cushion, but when that ran out I was able to find a job working as a waitress at that little restaurant just out of town. I'm not technically on the payroll, they just don't make me report my tips, and any extra money is kind of . . . earned under the table." You respond sheepishly.

God, Julian feels like such a fucking jackass for being a raging asshole to you. 

"That's . . . hard." Julian doesn't really know what else to say.

"Yeah." 

"Well, I've shared my deepest darkest secret with you. Do you want to share anything with me?" 

You and Julian talk well into the early hours of the morning, swapping life stories, funny anecdotes, and talking about all of the small things in between. Honestly, he feels at ease with you in a way he hasn't felt at ease before. The conversation flows naturally and even the silence you occasionally fall into feels comfortable. It's nearly two in the morning when you both look at the small clock hanging on your wall and realize the time.

". . . well, it's a little late . . ." You stretch in your chair, still sitting across the table from Julian. You don't really want him to go, but you've both run out of things to talk about and you still have some errands you have to run before work tomorrow. "You know, I have some things I gotta do tomorrow . . . but if you're feeling nice, maybe you can pay me back for dinner by making some for me. I'm usually too tired to cook when I get home . . . you know, only if you want to." 

It's hard for Julian to say no to that face.

"What time do you get off work?"

. . .

Julian continues to insist that he doesn't feel some kind of way, that he's just taking the opportunity to really get to know you - you know, in case you ever pose a threat - but the nightly dinner-dates seem to differ. 

"Why is it so hard to admit that you have a hard-on for (name)? It's so fucking obvious." 

"It's not like that Ricky. You know, I have somewhere to be so why don't you just fuck off and give me some fucking space?" 

"Oh yeah I know exactly where you want to be, all up in -" 

The truth of the matter was that even though Julian fantasized about it at night, truly nothing had happened. You were sweet, kind, intelligent, patient, compassionate - a truly wonderful person. And that was the problem. Normally, Julian found himself happy to jump into a relationship, but he found himself afraid of making a fool of himself. Guys like him didn't get with girls like you. Simple as that. Besides, love just wasn't in the cards for Julian. It just never worked out like that.

Tonight was yet another night of disappointment. You had lingered on Julian's doorstep after dinner, hoping that maybe he'd make a move and at least give you a kiss goodnight - but the two of you simply stood there awkwardly until he nodded, saying he was probably going to go off to bed now. It was frustrating because you thought you were sending all of the right signals. Light touches, flirtatious giggles, risque comments - the works. But yet again, you find yourself leaving empty-handed. It wasn't that you weren't satisfied with the friendship, you really liked the dynamic the two of you had. You liked that Julian showed you ways to save money, ways to spruce up the trailer home so it felt more roomy, showed you around town a bit - but it left you feeling a bit stupid because you could have sworn the two of you had something more. You could just feel it. But he never addressed it and it drove you crazy. 

You knock on the door nervously, your hands shaking.

Julian answers the door again. "What's going on?" 

"I don't want to go home just yet. This is about the time J-Roc films his adult films. Can I just sit here for thirty more minutes? He usually finishes up around one in the morning or so." 

"Uh, yeah, sure, come on in. You can hang out here. I have to shower because, you know, I got somewhere to be in the morning -" Tomorrow was the day he was supposed to drop off the product with the prison guards, "- normally I'd wait up but I got some important stuff I gotta take care of tomorrow. I'm about to get ready for bed, so you can just leave whenever you're ready."

"Alright." 

You find yourself sitting awkwardly on the couch as Julian disappears into the bathroom. The trailer shakes a bit when he turns on the water and you can hear the pipes rush before the water falls like rain into the tub. You sit in silence and contemplate. You couldn't keep going back and forth like this, it'd get nowhere. He had hinted a few times at maybe having feelings. Sometimes his hand would linger on the small of your back too long when he was moving past you, or he'd stand too close to you - so close your shoulders would touch - whenever he got the chance. But nothing would ever come of it, and you were tired of it. You think about maybe joining him in the shower but that's too ballsy of a move, so you simply sit there and listen to the shower run until it's turned off. There's more shuffling and you can hear him go into his room. The hallway light turns off and the door clicks close. You should probably get going by now, but you can't bring yourself to just leave.

. . .

You feel like a psychopath drifting down the hallway. You only came down here to use the bathroom, but now you were standing at his bedroom door - contemplating whether or not you should knock on the door.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Ricky, is that you? I told you to stop picking my fucking lock -" 

"No," You answer meekly, "It's me. I uh, wanted to take that book back I lent you before I went home. I didn't see it in your living room so I figured you might be keeping it in here." 

Julian stares up at the ceiling in thought. Julian is pretty book-smart and it doesn't take a genius to know the game you're running. He's been down this road a thousand times. He wants to say yes, but there's still the lingering fear of ruining the good friendship that's already there.

Julian turns his head to look at his nightstand, the small paperback book sat there. Shit, maybe you weren't playing any games.

"Yeah, give me a moment, I'll come bring it to you." 

"You don't have to go through that trouble, I'll just come get it real quick . . . if that's alright with you." 

". . . that's alright with me." 

You gently push the door open, slipping through before gently closing the door behind you. You can only see the outline of Julian's body in the dark, a few shadows illuminated by the moonlight that drifts in through the blinds. 

"It's right over here." You see the shadow of Julian's hand reach over and grab the thick book. Infinite Jest.

"I'll come get it." You pull yourself up onto the bed, you're knees on either side of his feet. Gently, you shimmy your way up, crawling over him on your hands and knees. Julian shifts a bit. Both of your breaths are heavy and as you sit yourself comfortably on his waist, you watch his chest rise and fall with heavy breaths. Gently, you pluck the book from his hand. "Thank you." 

"You're welcome." Julian's voice is barely over a whisper.

You thumb through the thick book, landing on a page barely illuminated by the moonlight, reading the page you've thumbed to. "Everything I've ever let go of has claw marks on it." Truer words have never been spoken. Like everything in life, Julian has sunk his fingernails so deep into it he's drawn blood. He likes to pretend he can let things go, but he can't. 

Julian's hands gently grip at your hips, squeezing them softly - almost like he's afraid that if he squeezes too tight he'll hurt you. His fingers grip at your waist, gently pushing your hips backwards, guiding them in a gentle rocking motion against him. Your hips follow the movement of his hands, rocking against him with a pleased hum.

"Is that right?" Julian asks in a whisper.

"That's right." You respond gently.

"Me included?" He can't hope that you want him so bad that you'd sink your nails so deep into him that he'd never be able to leave you, even if he wanted to. And even if you wanted to leave him, he'd probably stay around and beg for you to take him back anyway.

"If you'll let me." 

If he wasn't rock hard before he's rock fucking hard now. "I want you." Julian's voice is hoarse, completely contradicting his typically firm and masculine present. He melts under you. Whether he wanted to believe it or not, Julian was a romantic and the touch of a woman he really valued meant a lot to him. His breath is labored as he guides your hips against him, "Please, I want you." 

If this were someone else in the park, it'd be a different story. Sleeping around with people in the park for Julian wasn't about emotions, it was about releasing a physical need, and when you can't keep a boyfriend sometimes you have to turn to your neighbors for some help. Everyone slept with everyone. But you're not them, this isn't just casual for Julian - he doesn't want to fuck it up. He shudders when your fingertips drag across his chest, tracing patterns and circles into his shirt as you rock against him, grinding your hips downwards to create more friction. You're a tease, you take your time, and he hates it but he loves it. Two large hands reach up to cup your breasts over your shirt gently, His hands trail downwards, over your abdomen, grabbing gently at your stomach for a short moment before finding themselves at the hem of your shirt. 

"What are you waiting for?" You ask him between small breaths, still making rhytmic riding motions. It's a softly-asked question but also a plea for action. "Please, Julian. I've wanted this since the moment I saw you." 

"God, fuck you're so fucking hot." It's like a flip switched in his head and he can't hold himself back anymore. Strong hands placed firmly on your hips flip you onto your back. Now he's on top of you, every part of him everywhere. His lips touch yours in a kiss, teeth pull at the skin of your neck, and tongue sooths the freshly bruised areas by rubbing itself on it in small circles. Like always, he can't help himself, and unlike recently, he stops wasting time.

Your shirt is the first thing to come off - Julian helps shimmy it off of you, throwing it to the side. The next thing to come off is your pajama pants, which he also tosses to the side after helping shimmy it off of you. He has half a mind to compliment the pretty color of your underwear and tell you it looks good on you, but he doesn't pay it any mind since it's about to come off anyways. His hands lift you up by the small of your back just long enough for him to unclasp your bra, letting you fall back down onto the bed. His hands hook underneath your knees, lifting them up and pushing your legs up so he can help slide your underwear easily off of your body. You're left naked under him while he remains fully clothed, lowering himself onto you before you can complain that he hasn't undressed yet.

His thumbs roll against your nipples, gently pinching and pulling at them before taking them into his mouth. Julian has never been the most gentle lover, especially when he gets excited, always eager to take matters into his own hands - but that's part of his appeal.

Kisses trail down your stomach, followed by him dragging his tongue along the skin, pushing your legs apart. He takes his time adorning your inner thighs with kisses, sucking on the skin and taking it between his teeth. He likes the way he makes you whimper and moan, it's intoxicating. But eventually the teasing becomes too much even for him, he's growing impatient, so he lends his tongue to you, circling it around your clit, strong nose pressed into sensitive skin.

Your body writhes as you feel a familiar pressure build in your abdomen, thighs tightening around his head so tight he thought he might suffocate. What a way to go that would be. Your fingers curl into his short hair, gripping and pulling at his hair while your toes curl. You whimper but that only encourages him to slowly push his thick index finger into you, followed by a second after you properly adjusted. His mouth and fingers work in tandem, his fingers curling and pressing inside of you in a come hither motion while his tongue continues to stroke your clit.

"Fuck, Julian, god, fuck -" But before you can climax, he's gone - pulling away. If Julian enjoys anything, it's edging. There's just something about bringing a woman to climax and leaving them nearly in tears that turns him on. 

"You look disappointed." Julian catches a glimpse of your lopsided frown illuminated in the moonlight, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it." His shirt is pulled over his head, exposing his bare chest. When you touch the muscle, it's firm from years of consistent working-out. You trace a tattoos that look like they were done with a sewing needle and ink - probably stick and poke tattoos - but Julian frowns. He doesn't like those tattoos, he's not proud of them and he's not proud of his time spent in jail. But you only offer him an encouraging smile and place your palm over the tattoo before dragging your hand down to his belt, pulling at the buckle. Julian offers you a half-hearted smile. "Can't wait?"

Julian pushes your hand out of the way gently, taking his time to unfasten his belt and slowly pulling it through the loops. The belt is tossed to the side, along with his pants and underwear, leaving you both equals. Two hands hook themselves underneath your knees, placing your ankles on his shoulders while he uses his right hand to stroke his cock a bit, helping to harden himself up more. Sometimes the nerves just get to you.

"Holy fuck Julian you're big, you gotta be careful with that thing you're carrying a whole fucking concealed weapon -" 

Julian chuckles a bit at the comment but presses a gentle kiss to your ankles. "I'll be careful with you if that's what you're trying to say." 

The tip is pushed in slowly with great discomfort, pushing himself in. There's a stiff moment of silence as you let out a labored breath. 

"You good?" he asks.

You nod, dragging your teeth over your bottom lip. Julian takes his thumb against your bottom lip, peeling it out from underneath your teeth. His thumb drags your bottom lip down, exposing the inside of it before pushing his thumb into your mouth. Your lips wrap around his thumb, letting your tongue slide against the skin, sucking on the appendage as he pulls out just a bit, repositioning himself before he thrusts back in. Your body pushes upwards with the motion, head pressing against the headboard slightly. His thumb is still pressed in your mouth while his free hand keeps hooked underneath your knee, pushing it backwards so he can angle himself better - each thrust pushing itself deeper inside of you. Sweat coats his chest and runs down the side of his face, abdomen flexing the closer he gets to coming, but he restrains himself - wanting to ride it out for as long as he could. 

"Fuck, fuck, fuck." 

"Oh, God, Julian -" 

"Fuck, (name)." 

"Julian -" 

"(Name), (Name), (Name)." 

"I heard you did a real good job of running that girl out of the trailer park last night, Julian." 

"Hey, Barbara, why don't you fuck off?" 

[lifmera]

Hello there, can I get a romantic matchup for Hazbin, Helluva and Genshin Impact (I hope that's not too many)?

I'm bisexual (with a preference for men but I'm down for whatever) and I use she/her. I'm an ambivert. For those who don't know me very well, I may appear calm, collected and polite, but when I get close with someone, that's when my true personality comes out; I'm very sarcastic and sassy, especially if someone gets on my nerves. When I'm with my friends, I like to joke around, engage in playful banter with them, even often affectionately insult them (if that makes sense). I also love to tease and I don't mind being teased back. Even though I'm a bit goofy, I'm usually the rational, maybe even mom friend of the group; the type of friend who tries to stop the rest from doing dumb shit if I think it's too dumb or dangerous (but if it's pretty harmless, I'll gladly join in on the fun). I also tend to curse like a sailor lol. But my friends say that I'm also thoughtful, open and understanding. I can be very patient and gentle as well if I want too.

As for my style, I usually dress in all black (fun fact: I never wear skirts though, I despise them) and I love silver jewelry. I always have a silver ring on each finger or both hands (without them I feel almost naked) and usually snake or dragon-themed silver earrings.

My main hobbies and interests are: listening to music (I can't live without it), lately I've been listening mostly to any rock or metal type of music or similar (for example I love bands such as Ghost and Nickelback). Besides that, I also love to draw, read, and travel. Sometimes I also like to play or do some sports (I've been a horse rider since I was seven and I love swimming). But I also like to just sit on the couch and watch movies (preferably with friends).

Also, my main love languages are: psychical affection, quality time and gift giving.

I think that's it, thank you in advance!

Hi!! Of course 🩷

I’ve decided to pair you with…. LOONA, ADAM & XIAO!

I mean can you blame me? You guys would get along so well.

Honestly- her and octavia too would be drawn in by your sense of style.

Before she knew your personality, she probably thought you were just another person wither coming to work in the office or pay.

Once she got to know you though? BEST FRIENDS.

She would engage in playful banter with you, but at some point she’ll start to take it seriously. Similarly what she does to moxxie.

She thinks its hilarious when you join in on making fun of Moxxie or Blitz, or even joining in their adventures! Shes also glad theres someone other than her who’ll stop Them from getting into trouble per usual.

You and Loona would have the same Music taste honestly, i think you guys would head bang 24/7 if you could LOL

She’d love your jewelry honestly, and probably ask you to spare her some. She just wants to match :(

Not the biggest physical touch person, but she will hold your hand. She doesn’t trust anyone else around you. Other than Blitzo..

Time for ADAM!

Are we surprised x2?

He would TOTALLY ROCK OUT WITH YOUUUUUUU!!!!

He’s a jackass, but lets be real… (hes fine as fuck-) he would stop if you genuinely asked him, and he liked you!!!

If you joined in on the bullying? Or just teasing? Dream come TRUE !

He definitely would bully you for your style at first but listen.. its because he’s a loser and he cant flirt :(

If you are patient with Adam, it’ll mean the WORLD to him. He needs someone who will listen to him for once.

Definitely loves the music taste.

He probably steals ur rings when u dont notice, and then out of nowhere he’ll be like strumming his guitar n u just see ur rings… and be like “i thought u didnt like them..”

And he was like “ermmmm 🥹🥺🥺”

He def loves physical touch and quality time. They go hand in hand

OK XIAO TIME!!

I just gave you all the emo’s.

This is what you get!!!

Definitely when you first met, you both were silent as fuck.

Dont expect him to talk cus he wont.

So you finally talk, and honestly when he realizes your personality, i think he would enjoy being around you.

He might be put off at first, with the teasing but i think he would actually��� enjoy it ?

He definitely would like people who are more mean to him.

He thought your outfit was honestly so bomb, and would take your shit too.

What is with these characters…

Unlike the other two, he’d probably ask for permission though!! Cus hes a sweetie at heart.

Quality time and gift giving are his love languages for you!!

~~

THEY WERE KINDA SHORT!! IM SORRY 😭😭

[xiaoluclair]

hello okay i've seen you reblog 4433 posts so this is my invite for you to go fully incoherent rambling about why you love 4433 pretty please?

okay so i sure as hell ain't a vet but i Am intrigued invested enamored hopelessly sinking and it goes like This:

ONE. racer4racer ruthless4ruthless champion4champion. yall heard lewis talk about booing?? it just fuels me 💪💪. yall heard max? i'll just take my trophy home and they can have a nice evening ☺️. the objective energies are a SPECTRUM apart. but then you look a little deeper and Yeah, that's. thats a champion there and champion there.

alexa play monza 2021 silverstone 2021 jeddah 2021 interlagos 2022. in other words: racing other people?? yeah, fine. Can Do, no Problemo. racing each other? explosion Noises.

i.e. u know the phrase Opposites Attract? well. Yeah . onto

TWO. Opposites! e.g. Agendas (for lack of a better word.) max will kneel, will speak when spoken to. but give that kid the choice and he aint sayin a word. he is there to Race and have Laffs why u askin me about my political stance on cheese 🙄😒. lewis on the other more vocal hand Will Speak Out. prbly maybe it traces back to their childhoods, but im not getting into that Particular thing bc its too heavy for this and im not about to make it into a joke, So. yeah, the way they view their own Purpose within fame, the way max Wouldnt bc he thinks hes too small, insignificant in worldwide change, doesnt believe he can do Much for those larger social issues, then lewis doing so many things bc he might not alter the globe singlehandedly but he wants to be part of that smth Bigger. and no that is Not me saying max doesnt have a heart or doesnt want to help bc we've seen him raise donations and be Kind and condemn people for their shitiness. i just think, Opposites.

keeping with the seriousness: yall ever seen max wear smth not white and jeaned other than his racesuit and swim trunks?? MAYBE i can give him the singular fucking bowtie. lewis? ur catchin him suckin of the w14 before u catch him in that shit (Affectionate).

and to their hearts: both of them, who race to win, to be the fastest, to take home the trophy, to feed that fire as it burns on the track, to make their fathers proud. and then: lewis, who lives with faith, who races with God, who want to break records. max, who lives against superstition, who races with gut, who wants to rest. so Yeah. Opposites.

nYway,

THREE. i realize i havent actually touched much on their actual Dynamic HEE, so like. theyre fukin . miscroscope-worthy. in that they should be Studied. intently. i Cant with the whole, the whole Thing they have like. yeah no theyre not Best Buds or anythin but they Have been amicable. acquaintances. Rivals. and there is no fucking way im feeling Nuthin about two men racing with the Sole Focus of beating the other. first, thats 🌈🌈🌈🌈🌈YYY!!! second, that is Everything. who tf is feeling what either of them are feeling going into abu dhabi 21. who Else is putting down his visor knowing its Make or Break. who else is sinking into their cockpit pulling up at the starting line exhaling into their helmet as they watch the lights go out knowing its Now. its there, for Me or Him. its pinned in the center of Us right in the middle, could tip either way. who else, if not each other???? who ELSE I ASK!! also when tf did it happen before that two f1 title rivals went into the final race on equal points??? once?? idk but the Point is, theres two fuckin people (or close to) in the entire World who've been There, only one person who knows how you couldve truly Felt in ur Soul, hands on the steering wheel foot on the gas, has felt it too and hes sitting to ur left, takin a fuckin selfie of u both like sum social media Diva. smfh.

FOUR! they Actually get along???? like ik to some poople theyre tryna Kill each other 25/8 but dawg i think about tom sharing that lil story abt max asking lewis about his hair all the fucking Time its so Unhealthy i need More. n less often but still deserves Stage Time: lewis saying This Guy, this Fucking guy, and max calling him out on it right there on the podium. lewis showing max shit on his phone, makin him goddamn Giggle. the two of them just Joking Around, idk i think its Sweet. that they Can be okay, yknow, even with all the head to head (head 👀) shit they drove each other to in 21.

FIVE: the misc things! i.e. theyre no1s theyve both fucking Dominated the field. who else has on the current grid, i hear? No Fucking one. only Them. i.e. i think there is so much Potential. ik theyre so Different almost polar arctic antarctic north south but it warms my heart sm when theyre together Because of that. i.e. ik this post doesnt read quite so Shippy as it couldve but idk they make me feel More than that in a way bc theyre just so. Apart. and when they come together, it feels Monumental. plus the absolute Dawg the Cunt the 🧎🧎🧎 they can fit into a single photo:

.

Yeah .

[muqingswife]

how i think modern!aegon and modern!helaena looks like

@fan-goddess heres what you asked!

note: english is not my first language, im from brasil i speak pt br português brasileiro and im using the translator sometimes, sorry for my mistakes

lets goooo 😋

ok ill start with the same i started on aemonds (i just copied and pasted, if you've already read aemonds you can skip to the text under the dots, but if you havent read it, heres the link:

first off all, their family would remain a monarchy, maybe like danish royalty (i read somewhere that the Danish royals have more political power than the British royals or something like that, and i honestly cant think the Targaryens giving up any power that they could have) and here we DONT have incest!!!! read my thoughts below:

viserys didnt die yet and still being the king

he is rhaenyras stepfather so she can marry daemon with "no problem" and shes the heir of the iron throne

the line of succession to the throne would be: rhaenyra, jacaerys, lucerys, joffrey, aegon and viserys (idk whos the eldest), aegon, helaena, aemond and finally daeron

even though aegon is the 7th in the line of succession, he acts as if he were the first, which is unbearable most of the time

helaena on the other hand, doesn't care about royal duties as much as her siblings do 🤷🏻

they have the same hair as in the show, prove me wrong

aegon is a womanizer and everyone knows that, takes advantage of his title as prince to fuck girls (and even professors when he needs high grades 😶

helaena ALWAYS has high grades, she (try) helps her classmates when they're down in a subject but doesn't really have any friends, maybe 1 or 2 who are "close"

bc of that she stays more with aemond or with baela and rhaena

she is the quiet girl in the class, drawing random things in her notebook, sit next the window not too far forward and not too far back

while aegon is a total disaster - he sits with his little group at the back of the class and talks the whole class (idk if students still get sent to co-ordination for bad behavior in college, but if they are, he would definitely go at least 5 times a week

if he decides to study, he will give up after 2 minutes and the rest of the time, he is disturbing the class

returning to the appearance hc

this is how i imagine their style

i dont even know is that are rock or metal bands but he like this things and dont ask me the name of helaenas style, i forgot 😮‍💨

maybe aegon would have a band, like tom, i dont know if nobles can do that 🤷🏻

aegon would wear tighter clothes than my ass when i have a surprise test and helaena like looser clothes and specific fabrics (in my thoughts shes autism

helaena doesnt wear makeup and when she does, is not too much, almost imperceptible

aegon has dark circles

i think aegon would not be so tall, maybe 175cm/5'9 and helaena at most would be 168cm/5'6

as i said in aemonds post, helaena has a collection of insects, dead and alive

the collection of dead insects obviously she didnt kill them, she just found them and wanted to keep them to study

speaking of that, helaena would be an entomologist

SUNFYRE IS A GOLDEN RETRIEVER AND THIS IS CANON

dreamfyre is maybe a butterfly? im kind of confused which insect she looks like (im even afraid of flies and i really dont want to research insects 🥺

this was a little short because i dont have as much affinity with them than i have with aemond, but i hope u like it and help you with ur dr 💗

idk where u live but here in brazil its still 20th, i keep my promise 🥳🥳🥳

[soothsayerclub]

SOOTHSAYER CLUB 🔮

haiiiiiii X3 my name is Fairyfly, but you can also call me Wander, Fink, or really anything that’s polite XD I'm 24, I'm an artist, programmer, and explorer from St. Louis, Missouri. I'm ALSO a member of an endangered speciez - the scemo :o I'm trying to find more scene, emo, goth, or generally alt ppl to hang out with, who are also 21 or older!! ★

LEARN MOAR BELOW :D

WAT IS THIS PLACE

( -w•)╦̵̵̿╤─ --💥💥 I'm making this page 2 try to find other creeps and freakz in the area!! I'll be posting about what I'm up 2 when I'm out and about in public spacez or in a hangout spot online, so you can have teh opportunity to join meh!!! And hopefully I won't get killed along the way X3

WAT IS THE SOOTHSAYER CLUB??

I hope this place can be a bit of a local network one day!! I don't know where 2 find other scene or emo ppl IRL. I even went to a "goth bar" recently, and it looked like everyone was cosplaying characters from The Office @_@ It waz all normies. People were wearing fucking KHAKIS. It'd be nice if we could find each other, so maybe other ppl could go 2 this blawg 2 find out where to meet ppl like them :3

WHO EVEN ARE YOU???

Like I said, my name is Fairyfly/Fink/Wander/whatever!! I use primarily she/her pronounz in public 2 not get hatecrimed X3 I'm 23 yearz old, mah birthday is in October. I'm plural but we prolly won't talk about that :P I don't drink, but I don't mind when otherz do! I don't drive, but I'm a proficient bus uzer!! I'm scemo. I am tired of NOBODY MAKING ANY FUCKING WEIRD LIFESTYLE CHOICES ANYMORE Xx.

Nobody I run into is weird or cringe or has ANY convictions - I mean, ppl SAY cringe culture iz dead, but then they're wayyyy too plugged in to mean it. SO I guess I'm anti social media. I dont really wanna hang out if u use tiktok.

I work nights Monday thru Friday, and am nocturnal O_o

WHAT I BELIEVE: Queer rights are human rights. Black lives matter. Be a decent fucking person to homeless people, even if you can't give them anything. I will address u by whatever name and pronounz u choose, unless you're like trying to pull some genie logic shit and pick something rude. I'm fine with watever u are or wanna label urself, including contradictory labelz. I am pro furries, therianz, kin of any kind, and people who are plural for any reason. PIRATE MUSIC. Shoplift CAREFULLY ^_^ FUCK COPS. Don't start fights u can't survive tho LOL. Fat people don't need to be hot to deserve ur respect, but ALSO fat people are hot.

THINGS I LIKE: Making kandi, playing DDR, Jhonen Vasquez's works, the bus, flip phones, weird pedantic people, obsessives, music that sounds bad, underground bands, local concerts, St. Louis, bugs, amphibians, pigs, scene culture, emos and goths, debate, MP3 players (I LOVE MINE I'm so sad it broke LOL I'm buying a new one SOON tho), people with uneven eye makeup and no lipstick, lazy eyes, rainbows, thrifting, oddities, antique malls, sushi, meeting new people, trying new things, urban exploring, ZOMBIES, horror.

THINGS I HATE: People more interested in the optics of discourse and using the Right Terms to be an asshole 2 u than they are actually investing or acting on social justice or basic kindness. Advertisements and being advertised to. Hot people, social media, fandom. Has anyone noticed they don't let ugly people be in movies anymore? Even background characters have faces acceptable for Instagram, like weirdly smoothed out. EVEN the kids and the elderly are like. Macy's ad kids and old people. I HATE that. I don't like anime, sorry. If you try to show me a short form video on YouTube or Tiktok I'll throw up on us both. Oh and if you use algospeak (sewerslide, unalived, are you restarted, r/a/p/e, etc.) to my face I will peel yours off.

Errr IDK I'll add more later XD

[daekie]

i reblogged an oc ask meme from u and its only courteous to send questions! so here u go despite the fact we've never talked lol: ghost and betrayal for an oc of ur choice!

FAIR ENOUGH. FAIR ENOUGH. unfortunately ashton carver the vampire is taking up a lot of brain real estate and not even paying fucking rent (asshole. i’m getting art of him and maybe i’ll be able to think about other OCs after that) so ASHTON TIME

ghost: Who or what haunts your OC? What happened? How do they live with their ghosts? Ashton has tried to make himself into a thing that isn’t bogged down by his ghosts and he’s kind of succeeded. Not really. Mostly she uses it as fuel, because -- You ever find out that you’re infected by the malevolent cells of your vampiric bloodline’s progenitor, that you pass those cells onto anyone you use your powers on, and that those cells are completely capable of transforming their host into an avatar of said progenitor? And that you might’ve been meant to be an avatar, but you’re more stubborn than god, so it didn’t work? And you used your powers on your ex, who’s now in a position of immense political and social weight? And you used your powers on your other party members? And your boss? And your friends? Because your powers were useful, and nobody else had them, and -- Sometimes they just kind of sit and think about it. About how on some level, that’s still part of why he’s doing this: it’s not just to have total control and agency over his own self. It’s because if she wants the people she cared about to be safe - from her, and from everything her bloodline entails -- she had to leave. They had to leave. And maybe if he gets strong enough, maybe if he burns his progenitor’s fucking blight from this world and from his blood, then maybe -- but monsters like him don’t retire. There isn’t an after. If she’s lucky she’ll go out in a blaze of glory and take that thing with her. But that underlying knowledge of what could happen always haunts her, right alongside the ghost of the person she used to be, back when she actually did care about them; back when she was human enough to care about one person like that. And then he goes off and summons a bunch of demons because that’s how we cope these days. There’s no therapy when you’re an internationally wanted vampiric criminal!! There’s just looking at yourself in the mirror and going YOU DUMB SON OF A BITCH, THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT and then wearing your ex’s face next time you take public transport because you’re being so so so normal about those feelings you are pretending you do not have and can no longer understand.

betrayal: Has your OC ever been betrayed by someone they thought they could trust? Has your OC ever betrayed someone who trusted them? Hahaha. Haha. Ha. Betrayer, liar, murderer, devil-worshipper, soul-devourer, you gotta give her whole secondary subtitle all at once or you’re not being accurate, come on now.  All jokes aside, Ashton’s reputation for backstabbing and betrayal is mostly exaggerated, but you nonconsensually turn a man into the hulk to fight a demon and then immediately leave the city without saying goodbye + devour the soul of an ancient vampire for power + go on a mad quest for power involving mass murder + start worshipping demons once and he takes it so personally. The relationship is, uh, strained, but that’s kind of what tends to happen when you infect a guy with sentient vampire flesh cancer and then ghost him. They’re not friends anymore. Betrayal of Ashton herself, though... becoming a vampire was the big one. He really was in love, and he really did think the guy cared about him, and he really did trust the guy. Three months locked in a closet earning the privilege to have fingers or a mouth did pretty safely debunk the notion.

[tillman]

Actually please tell me about the assassins. Like why do people hate zato

of course always i love the assassins everyone is always free to ask me about the assassins theyre awesome and swag and modern gg loves to forget they have a fuck ton of lore and like a whole organization that basically ran the world for years? hysterical. like the assassins guild losing their grip on completely running politics only rlly faded out w ericas presidency and when venom took over cus well. venom. pwab. it was a whole thing. i just think its so funny they truly are just not talked about anymore.

anyways zato talk below cut the Attempted Child Murder Count is 2 btw if ur counting. 1/2 success rate on murdering children zato. tehy call him that.

anyways zato! i know him. im like . at a loss where to even start why people hate him. like first off he was Completely different before he died- xrd on Zato is not rlly the same character at all compared to who he was before, which was a power hungry freak of a man who turned the guild from slayers intentions of u know the whole dandy fun time to basically just killers for hire completely. awesome zato moments include: murdering baldheads patient, taking a contract to murder an infant, taking in orphans to make them in his own image (see: millia and venom), (possibly forcing Angra upon millia? she did only activate the spell 2 years after joining the guild and well its implied she was Young and presumably didn't really know what would happen. this ones just speculation but the timeline always leads me to ponder that one), uhhh agreeing to join a tournament because hes told millia will be there and he wants nothing more than to murder her. normal stuff. this is all pregame stuff too. i dunno i think the grooming two kids who viewed him as their only savior and idol in the world into becoming murderers and forcing them to fight each other is a bit hate worthy . good on millia for turning him over to the cops she should do this again. acab and all but put that fucker back in his void prison for the third time.

the main thing about zato is he just kind of sucks and ruins the lives of everyone hes impacted. id say millia is the most obvious example of this but like fuck look at XX era eddie, forbidden beasts (well. at least eddie they refuse to give more lore on the beasts and im suffering for it) incubate within their hosts and learn from them. eddie is the way he is Because Zato was the one who hosted him. and eddie even partially resents his impact in some of the endings, a lot of them focus on the struggle of eddie wanting to be viewed as his own person outside of zato (something something millia parallels this will never ever be relevant again now that eddie is literally Just a dog lol thanks xrd on) (in general i could also go on about how all 3 of the assassins eddie venom and millia all completely and utterly think of themselves as weapons because of zato but)

i could go on forever. honestly. i fucking hate zato. <- kind of a lie i really like his character and what he represents for the assassins <- this is also a lie i think what strive is doing with him is the worst most cruel shit and makes me so mad. anyways zato sucks.

also hes a spaniard.

[wolfiejack]

Ok as a "USAmerican" (never seen it written like that btw, kinda cool tho) here's my thoughts (even tho no one asked, I'm bored, yall can ignore this if u want)

The brands thing makes total sense, I get a bit of that with regional brands and such (like if I asked my boyfriend what Harris Teeter was he would have no idea because it's an east coast grocery store and he's lived in the Midwest his whole life)

Would love an example of the Weird American Things, I know there's a lot, I think we probably have some of the weirdest but I think all countries have some weird things only they do.

An inch is roughly 2.54 cm I believe. And a foot is 12 inches. Why? No idea... also I'm 5ft9 and that means I'm 69 inches tall which is way more fun than being ~174cm

A pound is ~2.2kg and no idea why it's shortened to lbs (probably something latin?)

Military time is just a 24 hour time format, so instead of 12 hours each of am and pm its just 24 hours. The first 2 digits are the hour. The second 2 are the minutes. So 0000 is midnight, 0730 is 7:30am, anything past 1300 just subtract 1200 and add pm so 1600 becomes 0400 so 4pm

Yup. Generally the US has some of the most fucked up legal processes which means those are the ones that end up needing explanation posts. Also people on the internet assume everyone is in the US especially Americans. We really do tend to forget that things work differently in other parts of the world.

I personally avoid political stuff mostly cuz it stresses me out, but I do certainly reblog many posts about events in the news so more people will hear about it (and tbh the guilt tripping sometimes works) and maybe something can be done cuz I am broke and disabled have very little I can do personally to make change happen right now.

Makes sense that people would pick up slang without realizing the context of it in another country. I don't think it's really an issue if ur not trying to be disrespectful but I'm white and not as educated on the history of AAVE as I'd like to be so my philosophy is to just do my best and be kind and hope that if I accidentally do something offensive people can be kind and respectful in letting me know so I can learn.

I actually thought Chick-fil-A was more widespread... maybe only in a few other countries. Anyway it's a fast food place that has a lot of chicken based food (chicken sandwiches, nuggets, etc.) They have historically been very homophobic. They no longer donate directly to anti-lgbt groups. Now the CEO (at least I think it's the ceo) donates to those places personally to make the company not look as bad. They did recently start hiring a diversity team tho so like they are getting better even if the ceo is a homophobe. Also I knew a trans girl (my roomate a couple years ago) who had dietary restrictions and Chick-fil-A was the only place she could eat on campus. I generally avoid eating there but there are reasons to do so and I think people treat it as more black and white than it is.

History is a BIG subject. No one can ever know all of it. I don't know that much US LGBT history let alone other countries. This is a problem with the education system here. I have no idea if other countries are better at teaching more relevant history than us (all history is important, but the US education system focuses so much on big world conflicts and far past stuff and less on the stuff that's relevant to current day politics).

I would be very interested to learn about words that are harmless in one place and offensive when directly translated. People in the US tend to be a bit easily offended about some words (the whole "politically correct" thing) but other words do have a historical background here that makes the offensive but the same word history did not happen in another country. I wish people could stop assuming malicious intent all the time and instead just assume ignorance and be kind about it and offer education rather than criticism. Then the person being informed on the offensiveness of a word would probably feel more comfortable to ask for other less offensive translations or terms they can use.

I feel like I have a better grasp on US Geography than many people, I had a little wooden puzzle map of the US as a kid and I got to a point I could to it super fast. Most people only know the state they live in, the nearby states, and some big main ones like California and Texas. We may have a slightly better grasp on locations of the smaller/ less talked about states but most people in the US could not draw any decent map. Americans just like to act like know-it-alls to foreigners tbh and I hate it.

I mostly use US spellings but sometimes (like the word grey/ gray) I prefer the British spelling. But also i agree that it really doesn't matter. Words are meant to communicate ideas, rules can help but obsessing over the rules is pointless because language changes and adapts and as long as the idea gets across then what does it matter.

Long car rides are very normal for me. I pass the time playing on my phone or listening to an audiobook if I'm driving. Honestly I fine it pretty relaxing but it can make my back and muscles sore sometimes. My definition of a long drive is probably different than yours tho. A long drive is at LEAST 45 min and potentially several hours. 15-30min is a very short drive to me. Very normal. I leave for work 30min before my shift in case of traffic. Many people commute an hour or more each way especially for office jobs. Also pur cars are bigger? I mean I know semis are big cuz of transporting products across the country and such but our normal cars are bigger?

Fire drills. Tornado drills. Earthquake drills. Active shooter drills. We have a lot of drills. It's good to know what to do in an emergency but very sad that an active shooter is a common enough emergency to warrant so much preparation.

Many US based studies should be broadly applicable to other countries depending on the subject. But yeah anything cultural won't be very useful.

While I do feel bad about messing up words from another language, I dont do it to be offensive (or on purpose at all) its just ignorance. Also i still hold with what I said earlier that language is about communication so my goal is less to follow the rules and more to get an idea across the best I can.

I frequently pretended to say the pledge. Made me very uncomfortable. I also will stand for things like the national anthem at sports events but I don't take my hat off or put my hand over my heart. Basically I try to avoid having to explain myself to other people around me while protesting subtly.

No idea where those words came from either. Here's a basic explanation of our system: pre-k/ kindergarten is ages 4-6, then grades 1-12 starting 1st grade at age 6, graduating at age 18. These grades are generally sectioned into elementary/ middle/ high school because there usually multiple school buildings, with each one to teach kids in certain grades. High school is grades 9-12. These grades are also called freshman, sophomore, junior, senior. I don't know why. Then if you go to college it's generally 4 years to get a bachelor's degree so they use the same 4 names. So you can be a sophomore in high school (grade 10, second year of high school) or a sophomore in college (second year of college).

The gas thing is probably a result of our fucked up economy and also a cultural trust issues thing. Gotta pay first so they know you have enough money for the gas you want to get. It is kinda weird but it's basically trust thing. Most things like events you have to pay first. You pay for groceries before you take them home. You pay for food before you receive it. The only exception I can really think of is sit down restaurants where you generally pay at the end. Basically in the US they don't trust you to have enough money you have to prove you have they money before you can get the thing so that the company does not lose money especially on things that can't be returned or resold like experiences or gas.

The US does have a lot of love for comfort foods, tho I bet most countries have their own weird ones I've not heard of too but you just don't see as much posts about those because the internet is so American centralized (likely due in part to the size of our population plus our being a large player in global politics, plus our culture of exaggerating self importance, which is a bit of a self fulfilling proficy)

I think the reason there's so much push to "learn your history" is because of that quote about learning your history or being doomed to repeat it. Also because unlike most countries the US is particularly terrible about repeating bad parts of history and not learning from mistakes.

Anyway if you’re from the US and you ever wanted to know what tumblr feels like from a non-USAmerican perspective (please note that the rest of the world is not a monolith either and none of these apply without exception):

Everybody’s talking about brands and stores you’ve never seen in real life. You generally assume they exist, but they might as well be one giant prank the rest of the internet is in on.

You find a post that just sounds wrong. It makes no sense. It’s like OP lives in a weird alternate reality. 9/10 times, it’s just some USAmerican Thing.

You’re still not entirely sure how much an inch is. Or a foot. Or even how many of the former there are in the latter. You maybe know your height in feet and inches.

You have no idea how much a pound is. You’d also like to know how the fuck pound shortens to lbs.

What the fuck is “military time”

Somebody talks about some legal process or something similar. They don’t mention which country’s legal system this pertains to. You know anyway.

People talk about politics. None of it pertains to you. Many posts contain guilt tripping. “How can you not care about this?? Why won’t you reblog this?? People need to know this about x candidate for y position!” You’re busy trying to stay on top of the political landscape in your own country.

You pick up some random slang from the internet. Monkey see monkey do. You’re called racist. You didn’t know it was AAVE. You learnt it from black letters on white background, not from the mouths of people whose faces you could see. How would you have known? You try to unlearn it.

People tell you that you must publicly denounce Chick-fil-A or you’re homophobic. You don’t even know what a Chick-fil-A is.

People say you don’t know LGBTQ+ history. What they mean is you don’t know USAmerican LGBTQ+ history. Nobody cares about your country’s history.

You’re “called out” on using an “offensive” term. It’s (a direct translation of) a completely harmless word where you live.

People expect you to have an idea of how far apart 2 USAmerican states are. You barely know geography past your country’s immediate neighbors.

You randomly switch between British and American spellings. Nothing’s real and there are no rules.

People talk about multiple hour car rides and you get twitchy just thinking about it. You suddenly understand why USAmerican cars are so big.

Somebody talks about school shooting drills. You only ever had fire alarm drills.

You see a cool statistic. The study’s only about the US. It’s unfortunately of no use to you.

People misuse/misspell words and names from your native language. It’s tiring.

(You feel sorry for the French. Nobody should be allowed to mangle the word déjà vu like that.)

You’re still not over the fact that USAmerican school children are supposed to say that pledge thing every morning. You’re never getting over that.

You still don’t know why the men are fresh or what the fuck a sophomore is.

Who the fuck pays up first and then fills up gas??? That’s made up, right??

Everybody has a weird obsession with some comfort food you’d never even heard of before you signed up here.

Fellow non-USAmericans, please add anything else you can think of.

[choshasan]

random rant caused by a dumb argument with my mother last night ✨️

I never liked generation wars and shitting on other generations and bashing them, because stereotyping a generation on just it's bad people is dumb as fuck,

But istg, Gen X is the only generation I've personaly encountered that like..

One person, or one person and their imediate friend group, does [x] and then you tell them, heyy.. uhm.. y'know.. that's.. pretty fucking rude, right? And they be like

NO. Everyone does that! You should change your mindset and go out more if you don't notice everyone does that!

Like????

I literally had a horrible argument with my mother last night cuz we stopped at a drive through and she started off with "you're gonna give me" (in french "Tu vas m'donner") and I told her "hey. You're not gonna talk to the worker like that, she's a human not your bitch, and that's rude as fuck, we don't talk to people like that, that ain't how you fucking raised me." And she went on this entire rant about how everyone talks like that and how that's fully acceptable to talk to workers like that and it's not rude and if I can't see that everyone talks like that, then I need to get out of the house more. And just so much more nonsencical Shit and like ?!?!?!

Bitch what??

Literally, 1. You work custommer service, I KNOW you don't got people talking to u like that all day, cuz I can hear them talking to u on the phone and the vast majority of them are super fucking polite.

And 2. I GO OUT MORE OFTEN THAT THIS BITCH BRUH!! Like, she goes out once or twice a week, to buy groceries and shit, and then she be like i KnOw hOw ThE wOrLd Is BeCaUsE i HaD a LiFe In ThE '70s AnD '80's

Like gurl- wake the fuck up. It's not socailly acceptable anymore to call women "skirts" and smoke indoors and smack ur waitress on the ass cuz she's cute or whatever. Y'all just old, entitled as fuck, and reffuse to let go of the past.

And like, I know it's not all Gen X, cuz most of the people I know's parents are Gen X, and they're such kind and accepting people who accept the changing of times and recognise that someday, the world will be left to the younger generations, so they gotta addapt to them and make the world a better place for them,

But jesus fuck the entitled Gen X who act like it's the fucking 40's - 60's still in the fucking 2000s, like?! You've had 40+ years to addapt bruh, where'd your brain fucking stop??? I know change is scarry and you won't always understand the younger generations and the weird shit we do, but remember, you guys did weird shit too when you were young, and your parents were assholes about it, and you resented them for not understanding you.. like?? Remember Queen?? They had a whole music video where they cross dressed. Remember the beasty boys?? Who did satirical rap-rock?? Remember twisted sister?? Kiss?? And all those other bands??

And most importantly, remember how you were taught basic human respect?? Remember that first retail job you really didn't like when you had rude clients but you didn't have a choice to put up with them because you needed the job?? Or maybe even you chewed them out and kicked theor asses cuz you didn't care, you could just get another job??

Lets not make others lives a hell for no reason, kay? Lets be kind and polite to eachother, cuz seeing grown ass adults be more impolite than a toddler is legit embarassing bruh- 💀

And god knows how much y'all care 'bout appearances 💀

[xorobyn]

Where tf to even start.

my god. they are right. when ur on ur shit ppl are going to hate on you as if they aren't the embodiment of what u make fun of. this silly ass bitch trying me up bc I called her out for being ignorant about politics. bc she's a dumbass trumpie who when asked simple questions cannot answer bc she is literally a moron. GODDAMN, I can't stand stupid ppl and that's fucking everyone around me. why can't people just educate themselves??? it hurts my brain how stupid ppl are. I can't have an intelligent conversation with anyone bc no one actually enjoys learning and being educated about politics, philosophy, science, etc. like I do.

this stupid bitch tried me up on my life and I HAD to set that cunt straight like I actually laugh. tried to diss me on shit that isn't true and is actually true of herself.

"Come at me again and don’t lie about being independent bc you have never once been independent in your life. You embody the people I make fun of for relying on a man to get by emotionally and financially. Couldn’t never ever be me. I actually chose to do shit with my life and not end up a loser like every other bitch relying on a man Why don’t u just answer all my questions going on with trump and prove to me you actually know shit. Oh wait u can’t bc u don’t 🤣🤣🤣

I take that back you never lived anywhere nice with that man. You’ve only lived in shit holes besides when [retracted] let u live with her for less than half of what she’s paying and when a male bought you a house.

I’m better than you in every single way and you know it. Including being educated and informed on current issues. Don’t be a typical trumpie who follows the crowd and doesn’t actually know shit and the typical informed liberal won’t call you out. And tell ur unemployed bf I said the same. You let a male move into ur house who u knew had no job. Dude… the desperation is embarrassing. All bc u can't afford to live alone and aren't mentally capable of it bc ur so weak. Could never be me. What was ur high school GPA? Was it even a 3.0? And flunked out of college and used a man as a plan for her life? Yes the exact person I make fun of for being a loser

And happy early 30th birthday. You’ve amounted to nothing bc you wouldn’t leave an alcoholic drug addict who beat you until the day he died."

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA

I HATE BITCHES seriously I cant even say I'm a woman's woman anymore bc im literally not. bitches are so pathetic. and that isn't to say I am for males bc hell naw I hate them mfs too.

I cant stand anyone except a bitch who is out here being completely independent on her own and doing shit with her life. God thts why I respect T and M so much bc they are actually bad bitches who are not using a man as a plan!!!!!!!!!!!!

AHH!!!!!!!

go ahead and fucking kill yourself. you will never amount to shit worth anything and your life is a waste. these stupid ass cunts I stg. I cannot stand a bitch who doesn't have her own shit, isn't educated, and chooses to live mid-ass loser ass lives. and the ADCACITY to try me up like they have shit on me hahahahaha. I hope this doesn't come across as me being offended bc im literally not. how can I be offended by anyone who is objectively worse than me?? LMFAO I tell these hoes not to try me up on the insult game bc I will always win. I have set my life up to LITERALLY be better than everyone. and the number one rule of dissing is to never bring up looks. shit is wayyyyyyyyy too easy to do. looks are subjective. shit doesnt even matter. you gotta hit ppl with FACTS to hurt them frfr. yeah calling them a fat ass is mean but its too fucking easy.

say thats why u been a single mom since 20

thats why u flunked out of college

thats why you work at a dead end job

thts why ur ass lives in that grimy ass apartment

thts why ur ass drives a car from 2005

thats why ur baby daddy left u for a woman who is actually doing shit with her life u broke ass dumb bitch

goddamn please spare me the tears.

I relate so much to these female rappers but like ACTUALLY. im so much better than every other bitch its RIDICULOUS!!!!!

Im just so fucking sick of the dumbasses of the world. can we do a genocide of these dumb bitches dear god I cant stand it anymore. yall hoes are making me a bad person bc I gotta shit on u and put u in ur place ratchet loser ass bitches. im just so heated bc I dream of a world where ppl are just like me. yes im perfect. im living life the correct way. why cant everyone be like me? why didnt everyone else start setting goals at 11??? LIKE ROBZ RLLY DID THAT started setting goals at 11!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I promise im not like anyone else. i never ever have been. god I cant wait to continue flourishing. goddamn, I love myself. im back to myself. im healed. im conceited as fuck. fuck

I know I spelt hela shit wrong but im just banging on my keyboard so whatever:P

[locklylemybeloved]

are you still a swiftie?

complicated answer tbh

i am very much still a taylor swift listener. i love her music. i connect to a lot of it. certain parts of the fandom are still AMAZING and genuinely some of the loveliest, sweetest, most creative and kindest people i've met on here.

that being said. there are a lot of really toxic swifties. i tried to stay away from them even as a hardcore diehard swiftie but its impossible. a lot of the fandom feels so toxic and hard to be in because it feels so high maintenance. so much is expected of you. i don't like that.

also. as for taylor herself. i have a lot of love and awe for her in some aspects. what she's created musically and culturally is incredible. the eras tour was truly the best performance i've ever been lucky enough to see live. she is a musical powerhouse and i think her ability to transcend a lot of misogyny and shitty people -- especially since she got big around the 2010s -- provides a lot of hope and inspiration for a lot of people (including me!!)

that being said she is still a privileged white person. this is not something she can change. that is ok. white ppl do not suck because they are white. the problem is when things like white girl feminism, performative activism, and blatant hypocrisy come up.

especially having a political activism era, going completely silent and then profiting off of that is not ok to me. i get that celebrities are not the golden standard for political activism, but if u are going to claim to be an activist. be an activist. yes, silent support is sometimes necessary (donations or whatever. i get its probably annoying to be questioned whether or not you do something. "oh she's doing too much" "oh she's not doing enough") but again. if you are going to claim activism and draw in a larger crowd and have ppl defend you because of that, you have to actually act on your words. performative activism just. it really annoys me.

furthermore, certain things she can't help and i get that. if her boyfriend is on the cheifs she's allowed to support him. but idk the cheifs supporting israel is really shitty. sure she's allowed to date whomever she wants but as a human being everyone has the responsibility to be a good person especially if you live in the public eye. matty healy was genuinely a terrible person, whether she dated him or not, and associating and openly supporting those kinds of people is never ok.

not even mentioning the fact that she claims to really really care about her fans but didn't say anything about pride until pride month, even when her trans fans were yknow being fucking harassed at her shows for their bathroom choice.

anyways there's a lot to unpack, and i don't think anything is every truly black and white. i'm absolutely not saying she's a terrible person. she is also not the most amazing person to ever live. (and i get that's ok i mean i sure as hell am not perfect and my grammy count is 0)

(also i think ppl who hate taylor swift for no other reason than they hate pop music should go fuck themselves. or just yk 'cause she's mainstream or whatever. there's a difference between being able to critique her/not liking her music so just living ur life and attacking and bringing her down)

also she's so fucking gorgeous like yeah i'll admit it she's azshfjwe,zthgfiueak,jsmngtuflhkajwem,zsf

also, i have just in general become way less obsessed with her personal life bcs genuinely i don't care. and that's ok. travis kelce does not interest me (but if he does interest you that's also ok!!! you're allowed to care about whatever you want as long as you do not invade anyone's privacy or treat anyone without basic human respect unless they don't deserve it)

so to answer your question fully: it's complicated :)

[mistigri0000]

Science is so young no doctor would be able to tell you if black people get pale when theyre sick (im black) (id say im brown skinned, i do get pale and i do blush especially when its cold outside im just saying. Most people wont be able to detect these symptoms bc of the lack of representation in everything, i mean some doctors still, to this day think black people feel less pain than the "average"(white) person, because yeah, the AVERAGE person, the human by default is white. Think of a human being right now u might be thinking of a white person) (maybe im thinking too much about all of this but living in a world like this, i feel like an alien, everything about me is out of the norms and it makes me sick. I just wish we could be seen and treated like normal people, like race wasnt an actual thing. The other day girls in my class were shipping our classmates and just like i thought they shipped me with the only other black person in my class, this is so childish but lol yk what i mean. This whole race thing is slowly starting to make me crazy. Seriously. Do yall feel that pressure of. Proving youre a normal respectful and polite person who has hobbies ? Like you have to prove that ure not "like the other blacks" but i hate this. I would like to be angry sometimes and insult ppl without the video ending on twitter getting qrt by racists saying im proving their points. It makes me sick to know some people dont even see us as human beings with thoughts feelings lives and hobbies. Seriously i talked with some bitch on discord who called other races "intellectually late" ?? It pisses me off and it makes me sad. And i feel like its just me so thank god if im the only person of colour who feels this way

But this shit is traumatising, im fucking insecure. I mean maybe me being the only black child in my family plays a lot too.

I have another story to tell too, i used to be in foster care and CPS would pay for every (white) kid hairdresser except for !!! Me, you guessed it. They refused to pay a black hairdresser to braid my hair, cornrows or even box braids or anything. They refused to buy me hair care, they told me i should use my pocket money if i wanted to take care of myself basically... 20 euros was clearly not enough. And im begging stop telling me im used to heat because i come from a hot country everytime i say im not hot OR EVEN WHEN I SAY IM HOT SOMETIMES its crazy. I was born and raised in france too like wtf

A lot of crackers wouldnt have survived teenage years as a black person)

[felidaefatigue]

the subsections of people too who are like. in 1 circle ppl who think because talks abt the complexity of having bigoted family means she isnt like. standing on business by cutting them off. and the other ppl who think shes "choosing to love family cause family live trancends poltics" makes me shake me head sm.

living in the canadian equivalent of the south like. dude its not some wholesome love or turning a blind eye. We want to drop those fuckers. We want to cut them off and call them names and shit. We probably could do more damage to their psyches than mostbpeople realize because they are FAMILY. But we dont. not because we looOOvEe them. its so much more complex than that.

U have to realize we live in places where we are destined to always be the losing team. No matter how much hope we grow like. It is dangerous it is shit and everyone is against you. And you learn ways to live with that WHILE fighting. And it HAS to be intersectional when you live like that and you are forced to realize that and stand by it. If you want to raise up the poor, youre going to have to get comfy with a lot of poor people who need your help who will hate your fucking guts and are terrible people by like political correctness scales. Almost every situation is rubbing shoulders with some type of asshole. There isnt enough people in these places who u can surround yourself with to make some safe insular bubble.

You choose your battles every day. And sometimes u will cut people off. Sometimes you will punch a racist in the face. And sometimes you'll note them as someone ur going to sit down with over dinner and grimace at their bullshit because you think they might have enough respect for you as a human for you to maybe tip the scales of their beliefs ever so slightly if you offer them the same respect. and THAT. is the love you have to build in these places. Its a love that is acknowledging even people who fucking despise you and who you by all rights can feel justified equally abhorring. But you dont because you can see their humanity and you feel strong enough in that moment to have hope for it and you try to maintain human connection because you know, logically and proven over and over, that humans only get better with love and respect. and it has to be genuine. it doesnt have to be all encompassing or with no boundaries or at your expense but it is the only thing that WORKS and we fucking NEED it to work in these environments. Because we need it returned.

Like I fucking hate my mother for a lot of genuinely good valid reasons. I wouldnt ever say I love her in the traditional sense of the word. But I recognize the realities that formed our relationship and our lives and while I dont forgive her I know exactly what happened and I have love for her as a human who deserved and deserves better and is WORTHY of love. If she had been treated better I woyld have been treated better. Cant do anything about the past but like. I can only try to do the best by both of us movin forward ya know?

Its just like. you have to recognize there is so much nuance and complexity and there is never the same right answer twice. I've given the same person hundreds of second chances and cutting them off and thinking theyre doing better and then disappointed again etc etc. like. idk man. theres something about growing up in a right wing area that makes u very.... accepting of the fact there is no correct politic. there is no way to save the world. there is no good answer. but you habe to keep fuckin swinging and missin cause you also still know we deserve better. all of us do.

amusing watching the culture confusion of mainstream listeners reacting to chappel roan's politic cause like. essentially the problem is just. culture difference. theyre expecting Pop Princess as in like. tswif or b.spears Princess. not. gay subculture Princess. Like shes using southern drag culture as her business brand. You arent the target demographic and ur misunderstanding the terminology its not her fault ur makin the wrong assumptions lmao immerse urself in the culture for a minute. Out of the cosplay of a Queen she's also a rural american lesbian like?????? daddy's baby girl isnt the foundation here ur stARTIN WAY OFF THE WRONG FOOT