#like what else can you do but go ''maybe ppl will change their minds? maybe i can act a way to convince them to do so?'' But No

[tricksterlatte]

Anyone else think short form social media based on algorithms designed to promote topics that create more engagement instead of more joy, the idea of fast fashion but conveyed through social media, and the fact you can monetize suffering and outrage better than ever has largely resulted in the death spiral of media literacy and the mass emergence of bad faith readings?

[itsalwaysdark]

i want to watch the things on my watchkist but i also never do its rly tragic

[snekdood]

nah idk the avatar live action is actually growing on me. i dont think i hate it at all. i'd give it like a 3.5-4 stars out of 5

[unproduciblesmackdown]

something abt The Family Unit as this bordered site potentially of a little system of authoritarianism being that it's really this example plenty of people have of how like, You Would Think "oh if the people In Charge realize the structural integrity of what they're in charge of & say they're Supporting is being degraded then surely on a practical basis they'd change course? compromise?" & like the compromises Are continually made to shore things up a little longer but it's a pyramid scheme & it's continuously crumbling. & the Logic of the authority is what's held on to no matter what, not whatever else is claimed to be the goal (e.g. having a Good Family, workplace, corporation, country...) & that means having all the power, which is never actually the case or possible so since that goal's never met it's really just about having More power (what's next, constant profit growth), & everything's oriented around That, such that yeah strategic fleeting compromises may be made but as this structure inevitably deteriorates further, i.e. the control as successfully applied power is being lost, it's not about compromising more & more until eventually things are egalitarian, it's more about lashing out & doubling & tripling & quadrupling down on the exact same measures always taken anyways, because of how the entire like belief is in being the authority, expressed by forever only following the logics of authority/hierarchy & control/abuse

that is to lead into how like, the Failure of [ostensible alternate practical goal: the cohesion of the perfect family(tm)] can happen in more obvious ways / on shorter timeframes than, say, the agenda of propping up an empire, & so there's like all this evidence of how even when the theoretically inviolate borders of The Family are ruptured there's like "wouldn't the relevant family members change their approach in the face of this undeniable failure. wouldn't they question themselves." b/c like, surely? how could you not? but the experience being overwhelmingly "absolutely they do not" with instead the doubling down, perhaps the strategic compromises that are then only used to wear away the targeted parties & then (perhaps after an incremental transition) be back at it once that defense is seemingly breached, but the same logic seems to "work" even in situations where whatever Unit is destroyed, partnership, family, friendship, acquaintanceship, b/c the sense of [i am entitled to More] is just like. undisturbed or "supported" by the ruptures & lack of access to whomever, the Denial of what they feel they're already entitled to. the dehumanization of others / No Need to ever have to consider & contend with those ppl's real feelings if you control their life enough anyways is all still at play & there's no room for even Now considering if you were wrong about how someone felt, so the logic might also default to things like "it's a total mystery but what matters is i was / am wronged" &/or "well things would've been great if i had my total authority like i should have & imagine i could have, so basically some Other enemy authority must be at fault (e.g. guess my child was converted by the gay agenda, the devil, the evil outside world, communist spies, anarchists, [the pc police the virtue signalers the woke dei agents the "almost forgot abt 'critical race theorists'"]" that it just so happens that agendas of Autonomy & Equality are ones that seem to inherently insidiously threaten & undermine their own. like yeah you're not wrong about that but in also true [every accusation a projection] form of course the belief must be that They are fostering bliss & freedom & the jealous evil agents of The Other are always trying to stop them :(

like "don't they realize this is counterproductive to the wellbeing of [what they're in charge of]" like compromises may be temporarily made along the way but not Really, no, & when push comes to shove it'll be about the priorizing of asserting & holding on to Controlling Lives vs anything that'd serve anything else. & that again, with families like you might see the decided Failure of that, e.g. very limited or completely absent relationship with an adult child, and you see that like. the Authority guardian/s who are the reason with it don't change their approach. any adjustments are strategic & meant to Ultimately restore the status quo; the people who managed to extricate themselves have to rely on their own ability to actually manifest their own choices to, say, be able to remove themself from the presence of this person if they want. and that like even with that lifelong experience of dealing with that Authority & the system under them it can be so difficult to believe like do they really not even question themself on all this despite the actual external consequences manifested? b/c the Logics are so different. the child made effectively Responsible for the actions of an adult or two / the supposed Wellbeing of the family is so much more used to having to consider others' Feelings & what might make them act xyz way, b/c of that impossible but evident tasking with being harmed if there's any Problems there, versus that the person "in charge of" the wellbeing of the family & individuals therein (& certainly the young children) being concerned with their own entitlement & whether everything seems to reinforce their authority, flexing it if not, disinterest in so much else, resentment for the physical needs of children as a begrudged investment in then lifelong entitlement to kids as property to give deference / whatever support you want. & when these "supported" children are never "grateful" enough, i.e. not noticeably thwarting efforts to access whatever a parent feels entitled to (with, exactly in line with all of this, pretty invariably Issues With (denial of) Any Boundaries, e.g. not allowed to close that bedroom door this is my house, not allowed to not want to be touched i made that body, not allowed to be unsupervised what are you hiding, not allowed to say no, not allowed to have feelings/moods/preferences/opinions not in harmony with mine...) like it's supposedly only an extreme, all the more sympathetic (to the authority parent) escalation of this Ingratitude to, if possible, escape the realm of said authority. can't believe they'd do this to me

just that tl;dr of like "but at this point [authority] is sabotaging themselves i.e. the longevity of any system where they even have that position of authority? surely they realize that & change their approach b/c they Have To?" & beyond "no, not necessarily" like it's so almost Necessarily that "they definitely will not & will just try to 'invest' in their perpetual authority (which is always trying to be Increased b/c it's also never total or unbroken) by upping the violence & lashing out & ignoring w/e they have to ignore b/c they do Not have any actual alternate way to address it" like no the parents lose the entire relationship with children & don't have Realizations abt it, don't question themselves, don't make a real change, don't stop feeling as, & increasingly, entitled

[herejusttosufferalong]

Now that L has painted a big arrow on the timeline at June 2021, I’m curious about what you think S2 filming was like between the two of them?

L was still with J, they had found out they were going to be leading season 3, they had less screen time and more downtime than S3, and they posted THAT selfie. Thoughts?

Let me just give y'all my thoughts:

I think there was always feelings between the two of them and S2 filming really started to cultivate the blurred lines for them.

They knew early on in S2 production they would be leading S3 and they have both been very vocal about the prep they started to lead S3.

I think they both recognized pretty quickly they had feelings for each other but never discussed it and the used S3 filming and their characters to act on their feelings.

I personally don't think they ever crossed a line physically outside of their characters, pre or post break up with J.

I think a conversation was had between the two of them, sometime between the wrap party and her going to his play. I'm leaning closer to the wrap party.

I do think N was the one to shut things down for multiple reasons like L just getting out of a 4 yr relationship, them being in the BTON bubble and blurring lines, and then her truly thinking that maybe they had gotten whatever it was out of their system during filming.

I also don't think L was honest when they had their conversation. I know a lot of people within the fandom think his confession sort of "scared" N off with him dropping the love bomb. I feel the opposite. I think he downplayed things out of rejection.

Which is why we see him do a 180 last summer, he is running.

I think after she went to his play there was limited contact between them, partly because she had been seeing someone else, until Dec '23 when they met back up for reshoots.

During reshoots they fell right back into the blurred lines because nothing was actually resolved from their previous talk. They may have had another conversation with an understanding regarding the upcoming tour.

Which I believe is part of the reason we get the tension after the NYE kiss and during the early Jan interviews.

I don't believe N was seeing anyone Dec '23/Jan '24 but I do think it may have been rekindled in Feb/Mar done by early April.

We can tell from all of the press junkets and livestream events Feb-Apr that there is something there between L and N, I don't think it was lost on them either.

Australia def solidified things for them exhibiting their feelings outside of their characters and being forced to really examine it. Another conversation was had.

Then we have the InStyle stunt followed by a bunch of articles claiming L to be single.

A week later they are in Italy.

There is tension. Why? I think it is truly due to their lack of clear and honest communication up to that point. Another conversation is had, with their bodies, and all is well for the rest of the Italy stop.

I don't believe L had any intention of taking A to the NY premiere but I also don't think she flew there and surprised him. I don't think he was happy she was there but I also don't believe he yelled at her or got into an argument with her at the after party.

Reasons why I don't believe she was ever invited to NY:

She had bought her own ticket to get into the premiere/after party.

Her seat at the Knicks game seemed to be a last minute get.

And the Chaos dinner.

I'm def in the minority with this one but I don't think L would have accepted the invite if A was planned to go to NY. I could be wrong but the dinner already seemed completely outside of L's scene of ppl to network with. He was going for N and N alone, you can't change my mind.

Then we get Brazil. This is tricky because I don't believe L had ended things with A like some ppl do but I do believe they were just casual.

I am def in the minority here as well, I don't believe L took A to SF during the break between Brazil and Toronto. I think the pic A shared was an old one. Could be wrong tho. I think he was elsewhere and not with her and that was the reasoning behind the liking spree and getting some family/friends to follow her. All so she didn't act out, go figure it would be her mom who caused the drama...

Cut to Toronto. There is perceived tension between L and N but I think the fandom got this one wrong. They both seemed to have been ill in Toronto so I think that and jet lag started to catch up with them. All was fine in the end.

Not much to say about Dublin or Galway. I think lines were drawn by someone as things got a little too real.

And now here we are.

Let's discuss...

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

horse girl charlie morningstar, her partner in a cool hat and eye patch vaggie, and the Hazbin Horse Rehabilitation Ranch- where shit people are introduced to horses no one else wants and hopefully no one get trampled to death (niffty this means YOU)

other key features include

vaggie riding a small working horse and ppl keep calling it a pony and she keeps telling them It's Not A Fucking Pony

charlie and her beloved mule, who never listens to her

angel dust wanting to learn dressage bc it looks like "fancy sexy riding" and also he was banned from mentioning the words "bare back" or "bucking bronco"

husk constantly found drunk and asleep in his horse's stall while said horse nuzzles him

niffty obsessing over grooming all the horses down to their individual hairs, yes even the bad tempered horses, yes she likes it when they shmoosh her against a wall or step on her foot

alastor looking calm collected and in control on his horse as he wanders off from the group and never participates in activities bc his horse won't listen to him either and he's too proud to admit it

sir pentious keeps trying to make his horse look and preform the best using his own new designs for tack and gear and it always backfires but he's the go-to one if your saddle needs adjusting or fixing

his egg boiz are a flock of chickens

his horse keeps eating the chickens' eggs and he keeps crying over it, even when charlie tells him they wouldn't have hatched into chicks anyway

lucifer lives in a shack somewhere around here with his collection of customized my little pony brushible toys

the locals in the nearest town still talk about lilith's incredible horse whispering skills before she up and vanished

charlie gushes about these stories a LOT but laughs nervously if asked about her own way with horses

she tries.

her way of making sudden loud squees and eeeks and excited yells and wild energetic movements doesn't fit well with most of the horses

she also slips up and gets flaming mad at anything that threatens her family's ranch or anyone who mistreats a horse

angry charlie is Scary Charlie

her mule doesn't care tho it knows she's a pushover treat giver

when vaggie first figured out what was happening she spent weeks with her own horse slowly getting it used to all sorts of weird charlie-related things, including stealing charlie's jacket a few times to flap it wildly while chasing her horse around the paddock singing loud show tunes

vaggie's horse is the only one that'll let charlie ride it without being a nervous wreck

charlie maybe cried a little when she went for that first ride

vaggie has a shot gun

she spends a lot of time checking on things riding far out and alone and keeps the gun with her just in case

she's never actually threatened any of their human boarders with the shot gun but she does have an unnerving tendency to check and clean it whenever she's pissed and trying to keep some shred of her patience intact

every week there's at least one night set aside for an evening dance after dinner and yes chaggie was doing it long before any other ppl showed up

valentino showed up once and charlie chased him off the premises with vaggie's shotgun

the ranch used to have a television

now it has a radio tower

no one except alastor is happy about it but his radio commercial revenue is paying for most of this so they all keep mostly quiet about their grumbling and record voice lines for ads when he looms over them with a script

vaggie swears the time she shot out the radio tower's windows while arguing with alastor over her and charlie's voice lines was a complete accident

razzle and dazzle are ranch dogs who keep track of the horses when they're out grazing and both are COMPLETELY in tune with charlie, been with her since childhood, the three can basically read each others' minds and watching them all work together is like watching magic

(vaggie also knows how to work with them but has to use more obvious signals instead of just tiny changes in body language)

vaggie keeps trying to gently remind charlie there are events for dog handling she could enter in

but the ranch was lilith's passion and rehabilitating rejected horses her dream and charlie is not not giving up on that OR on the rejected people her mom always was so proud of and charlie is NOT letting herself think for one moment that her mom isn't coming home

speaking of coming home

chaggie met when charlie was out riding after a storm looking for a lost horse and found it staring curiously down at a half dead lady lying in a ditch with a freshly gouged out eye and burns on her back

the half dead lady claimed she shot out her own eye by accident and got hit by lightning

or maybe fell asleep on a campfire uhh

charlie was way too busy figuring out normal social interactions again and also how to patch up a pretty lady without being a complete fool about it to question vaggie's super realistic tale

vaggie was planning on staying just long enough to get on her feet again- especially after she started catching feelings watching charlie being sweet with all the stubborn horsies- and seeing how much charlie was struggling with the ranch without having someone else to look after

she was even gonna steal a horse on the way out

and got caught by charlie in the act

charlie just smiled sadly, told vaggie she was glad she wasn't heading off alone, told vaggie's horse to take care of her, and then went back to the daily chores

vaggie caught up with her an hour later

she'd had to properly put her horse away and get breakfast started first, for after they've finished up the morning stuff

they've been running the ranch together ever since

keekee the cat is the actual boss on the ranch and got her name from how doors always open for her (bc she bothers whoever's around until they drop what they're doing to obey her)

cherri bomb stops by once just to laugh at angel dust and ignore pentious but ends up being the only one who figures out why the new horse is spooking at everything- it's got hearing loss, and she's got it too from doing endless unlicensed fireworks shows, and she's totally just sticking around until the horse gets used to things here. totally

[thequietkid-moonie]

Yandere Aquamarine Hoshino - Headcanons

[ YANDERE HEADCANONS ]

[ Oshi no Ko ]

⚠️ Yandere, I don't support nor try to romanticize this toxic behaivor, is just for entretaiment

I really REALLY love Aqua, he is just so ✨ amazing ✨ Thank you so much all the ppl who asked me to write this, it gave me a lot of motivation. This is dedicated to them!! I reaaaaaally hope you like it as much as I love Aqua did!!

Also, please be aware that I've only seen the anime!!

After dying tragically he was blessed with a new life, being rencarned as the son of the person he admired and loved the most in the entire world, now going by the name of Aquamarine he started to live a dream life, it wasn't all perfect but it was amazing nonetheless, and Aqua wouldn't change his new life for anything else

However, the cruel destiny had others plans and an unfortunate day life would be taken in cold blood from his beloved Ai, and not just that, Aqua had been forced to watch his beloved mother bleed to death and give them her last breath with an I love you without being able to do anything, even when he had the knowledge and determination to help her his body was too small and young to do anything

That day Aqua doesn't just lost his mother, he lost the most important person in his life, the one he loved the most, the one that was the light of his life, losing Ai is something that Aqua never got over it and felt like he had nothing else in life, it becomes his whole purpose to take revenge to her death because he feels like his life lost all purpose without her, Aqua was sure that nothing could ever bring him so much joy and happiness to his life after losing Ai... but he was wrong

Aqua was always focused in his plan, that much that he almost completely forgot about the rest of the world, he was too focused on achiving his revenge and protecting his sister that he almost lose the opportunity to light up his life again, he almost lose the most important person in his life once again without noticing it

Getting to know Aqua was pretty difficult from your side, so if it isn't you the one who were interested at first and insist it has to be the other side, being Aqua who grows interested on you after noticing how bright you are, how much potential you have to bring joy and light to others life (however, if it depends on him it would take some time because even if he noticed it pretty quickly he doesn't want to just get excited so soon)

Is a slowly process to get Aqua's attention and get close to him but when it happens it will be a point of no return, once Aqua noticed you and get interested on you there is no way you will be able to get away from him, not matter what you do he isn't going to lose the light of his life again

Aqua doesn't want to get all excited immediatly by you, even when his heart is racing and his chest feels warm and fuzzy, a feeling he swears that he only had when seeing one of the presentations of Ai, at first he doesn't want to accept it and will see you pretty wary, prying every little detail he can get of you, getting a point were he is just following you around without your knowledge, all of this with the excuse that he has a feeling about you, but is a feeling that he doesn't comprehend

It reach a point where it start to become pretty obvious that something is bugging his mind, Ruby, Miyako and even the director notice how distracted he seems lately and they started to point it out for being worried, he is normally calm and composed but right now he seems troubled and maybe even anxious and still he denies everything

It take him a while to understand his feelings, he is so used to being focused on his revenge that he doesn't fully understand that what he feels for you is and intense love and an overwhelming need to protect you, he isn't wary of you but of everything around you, you are just too bright! too beautiful! too special! he can't help but feel atracted to you, you are like a ray of bright hope that illuminates his dark and empty world, you make him feel more than regret and desire for revenge

The moment he finally realice the inmense love he feels for you Aqua has a moment of feeling immensely desperate, he already lost the most important person in his life once and the only though of something happening to you freak him out, Aqua NEEDS to be close to you, Aqua NEEDS to protect you, so after his initial anxiety he quickly start to work on his plan to get close to you (even if you already tried to befriend him he needs to feel like he is doing something to get close to you), he had already a lot of information about you so now he just has to use it to get close to you

It actually doesn't take much time before you two become close friends, Aqua is really smart and he can easily act in a way that will make you easily like him and trust him, so in no time you two become close. The main objective of Aqua was be able to protect you but as the time pass and you two get to know each others more (he prying more and more information about you without your knowledge) he can't help but fall more and more in love with you, with every moment you two spend together Aqua is more and more convinced that you are perfect, that you truly are a star that illuminates his life

Aqua has a big soft spot for you, it doesn't matter how you are or what you do together, every moment Aqua has the opportunity to spend with you where your fully attention is focused on him, where is just the two of you it feels so pure and magical, it feels like a true bless for him to be able to bask in your presence and do anything and everything, even just small and mundane chats feels so soft and warm, a really refreshing environment and a break from his usual sadness. That is why Aqua hates with his entire being whenever someone dare to interrupt the two of you in one of those moments, it isn't always that he has the opportunity to be with you alone or take a break of his plans of revenge and being interrupted is like if others where forcing him to return to the cruel reality that just want to take you away from him (even if is Ruby who interrupt he gets mad, however he can't really stay that way for too long to his sister)

There are moments where Aqua feels like he shouldn't be near you, he feels like he will just bring you problems if he continue insisting on interfere with your life, like if you will be safe and will be better if he just let you go away and be free from him, what he wants the most is your safety and happiness and he can't help but feel like if he himself were a danger for you, but that thought is quickly vanished the moment he sees you again, Aqua can't just live without you, you are the light of his life, he needs you and if that means to protect you with his life he is more than willing to do so

Aqua is always lying and acting to achieve his goal but as the time pass is more and more difficult for him to lie to you, his true self just slips from his lips without being able to stop it in time, he just let you know things that are personal to him, like his feelings or what he wish, and yet he never is completely sincere, he won't let you see that part of him that wants you all for himself or that part of him that is burning with a desire of revenge, not completely at least

Just as his love for you grows it also does his need to protect you, he even start to become pretty possessive over you, is just that the memory of what happened to Ai hunt him down, the impotence and terror he felt that day fulfill him with anxiety, it even bring him nightmares sometimes about you walking away from him or even dying in front of him without being able to do something to prevent it

Aqua is already afraid of something happening to you, but if you work in the entertainment industry his worries just increase, he knows how crazy the fans can be and he wants to protect you from anything of everything so a situation like this will make him really worried. It would depend in how far you had come to what he will do, if you are just starting he will sabotage your work just for you to have no other option to leave it and try with another work less dangerous (also, taking advantage of the situation to comfort you about all of this and get closer to you, something he is not proud of), but if you already are famous, even a little, he won't do much since it could be very complicate or bring you problems, Aqua will try to stay calm and just support you but he is easy to trigger, at the minimal sign that you could be in danger (physicaly or mentally) he will start making a plan to make your career fail in a way that won't be suspicious or seem too unfair

Aqua never show this part of him to you nor directly warn you of posible dangers, he want you to think that nothing will ever hurt you, you shouldn't worry your pretty head about such terrible posibility because he will make sure it never happens, even if he has to investigate every single person in your life to make sure non of them will represent a threat. However he tent to indirectly tell you that not everyone is worthy of your trust (except from him since he already showed you of being trust worthy)

Aqua is willing to do everything in his power to assure your safety and to assure that you will never leave his side, if he has to manipulative everything around you to make you see that he is the only safe option or even manipulate you to become completely depend on him he will. However he won't be so happy with having to manipulate you, deep down in his heart he wants for you to care for him and love him just as he loves you just for who you are, and also he want for you to never lose your brightness, he will feel terrible to do something against you but his anxiety doesn't let him alone, your safety is his first priority and Aqua is willing to do anything he has to keep you by his side and be able to see your beautiful smile every day

Aqua will make sure you trust him so much that he can easily lull you to do what he wants, he knows what is better for you, he just want to keep you safe, he knows what is better for you, you don't have to worry about anything because he is here to protect you from anything and everything, you can feel free to put your life into his hands because he will take care of you like delicate and beautiful star you are, he won't let anyone reach you ever again, you won't have to worry about anything again, you have him and that is the only thing you need, he will care for you and love you just the way you deserve for the rest of eternity

Tagging the people who were wanting for this, thank you so much for you patient I hope you like it!!

@lumiriai @azriel-sama @miyakoa @elysiaxas @kwelibeeery @daily-average @gloxiniasbitch @kult-o

[morinuu]

LISTWN TO ME I JUST READ YOUR TAMAKI ANGST AND YOU KNOW WHAT WOULD BE SO FICKING GOOD??

A she falls but he falls harder

Reader finally gets over it and stops coming, moving on and focusing on herself, and he notices and starts realizing how he took her for granted

And then its him that's loosing his mind and shit like that. Dude. Dude. I'm loosing my MIND you write so well

first of all ty for the compliment >< so glad u liked it im blushing and giggling!! secondly im not sure abt the reader completely abandoning tamaki's side (i love being delulu), but i do have smth else in mind that's kinda similiar n i hope its satisfactory :3 i changed only a minor part from the og :P i wanna make this a small series..... maybe like 3-4 parts.. anw this is pt 1

☀︎｜tamaki x female reader. almost 4k words. continuation of this. ure sick, yamada hinata & aoko r just some ppl i made up for the plot, tamaki's pretty stupid n emotionally unintelligent, lots of feelings and background information, y'all r childhood friends, there's like one 4th wall break but i thought it was kinda funny so i kept it

you weren't a fan of february.

allergy season was your absolute worst, the wheezing and coughing sucking the life out of you as you struggled to change out of your clothes to get the day started. you didn't sleep much, interrupted constantly by your sore throat aching and squeezing.

sure, it's just hay fever to everyone else, but for a young woman who carried around an inhaler, it's hell. well, almost hell.

what was truly hellish wasn't the fatigue or the sneezing, but your mum dragging you back in the house and forbidding you from going to school until you're well enough to study again. how were you supposed to keep up with chemistry class if you skip?

not that your parents cared for your grades; they knew you could just enter whatever field you wanted with the connections your family held, but it felt nice to be awarded for working hard.

after your personal maid let out a small "pardon me, miss" and carried you back to bed, you realised that the feeling your soft quilt hugging your cold limbs would never be beaten by the jacket you desperately clung on to warm yourself in p.e - which just so happened to be your first period that day and you were dreading it.

"i'll be making you some tea, miss. would you like to breakfast now?" your maid's quiet voice addressed you, hoping you'd just sleep the illness off as you usually did so she could rest too.

to be fair, you weren't a very easy master to please, so could you blame her?

"i'll breakfast la-" a cough and some wheezing "-i'll breakfast later, bring some english breakfast with a slice of lemon." you said nothing else, instead focusing on calming your throat that seemed to intensify in soreness. "a pastille too."

"understood my lady, i'll be right back." she bowed and excused herself from your room, ignoring your groans of annoyance as you buried your face into the pillow.

"damn it." you muttered and extended your hand to grab your phone from your bedside table. unlocking it with the passcode (because you weren't in the mood to lift your head and let your phone scan your face) you squinted as the light mode of a social media app hit your eyes harshly, forcing you to use muscle memory to lower the brightness to its minimum.

you scrolled through, liking your friends' private posts and decided to message one of them.

yn.spam: gm dude, i cant come to school today cus im sick. can u do me a favour n tell aoko to give me her notes? she never looks at her messages.

with your phone back on the table to wait for a response, you lied back comfortably and closed your eyes, because as much as you wanted to watch something on netflix or play a video game, you didn't want to make things worse for yourself.

you grew impatient for the cup of tea your maid was brewing, rotating between wheezing, checking your phone and staring at the ceiling. it seemed like the seconds weren't passing by at all.

soon enough, your maid comes back with some fancy tray carrying a kettle, your favourite mug (the one your daddy drank from when you were a little girl before your parents divorced), a tiny plate with some lemon slices and a small box of pastilles as throat medicine.

you didn't thank the woman when she helped you sit up, nor when she stayed by your side to make sure you didn't choke between coughs and burnt yourself with the hot liquid. just as you took your first sip, your phone lit up to show your friend's response.

thatguyhinata: Ayooo gppd morning. Sry to hear tht. Sure if I see her I'll telm her.

the irises in your eyes rolled upwards at the boy's typos that irked you every time, completely ignoring how he didn't wish for your recovery.

yn.spam: thanks yamada

you never used any of your circle's first names, which your mum always found weird.

'you sure these are your friends, darling?' she would ask often, and your response would always be the same:

'yeah mum. leave me be.'

only tamaki had ever felt close enough to be called by his first name.

after swallowing your medicine, you dismissed the older woman standing over you and pulled your quilt over your quivering form again.

"gods, please let this be over soon."

...

well.

...turns out, you gotta be much more specific with what you ask of gods, because they might not have the same understanding of the word 'soon'.

here you are, three days later, with your allergy having been combined with a virus that'd been going around, intensifying your asthma symptoms and raising a high fever, making your mother and doctor ban you from walking into ouran.

halfway throughout the day, you realise what had been completely slipping your mind while your lungs were occupied inhaling abnormally.

"i have an appointment today!" you exclaimed with wide eyes, raising from the bed like lazarus from his grave.

"...?" the new maid next to you didn't say anything, she was clearly concerned. after some seconds of you overthinking something, she spoke up. "you have no other doctor's appointment today, my lady. he just left 10 minutes ago."

you shook your head quickly, ignoring the dizziness brought by your fever "bring me my phone," the girl was puzzled "now!"

bowing a quick apology, she rushed to your desk and handed you your phone with both hands, not daring to look up. you disliked new maids; they were inexperienced and annoying, but scolding her would have to wait.

"damn it, damn it, damn it!" you murmured under your breath and tapped furiously on your phone, trying to find where the hell you'd written kyouya's business e-mail address.

you had it saved as every other client of the host club had, but you had never actually used it, not once.

you never missed an appointment, and always booked the next one tete-a-tete with the black-haired manager. if you became a no-show without prior notice, wouldn't that look bad? would it annoy kyouya and he wouldn't accept you in the club again?

well no, but you had the habit of overthinki-

'would it annoy tamaki?'

you groaned and murmured to yourself - had you deleted it? maybe it was in your notes app and you erased it? was it on your old phone from a month ago?

"find an e-mail for me." you ordered the maid who looked up at you perplexed, but carried out the order nonetheless.

the girl was embarrassed when she found out her master was asking for a host's email, wanting the earth to swallow her when she dialed the ouran academy's number. 'the stuff i do for money..' she thought and prayed her family never found out.

it wasn't a long process to retrieve the address, but what was, was the rant hitting the maid's ears when your overthinking about what to write left your mouth at incredible speeds.

"should i say i'm sick? but he already knows that- he's in my class! maybe tell him to give my time to another girl? no wait, he would do that anyway... or after i apologise, i'll say that, like, something came up- but that's not believable enough... ugh!" you buried your face in your pillow and, unbeknownst to you, your new maid's eye was twitching in annoyance.

she understood now why your personal maid took the week off just when you got sick - not that she understood how and why your mum allowed it though.

(it's because you can be insufferable and she gets it.)

"my lady, may i help?" the girl let out, clearing her throat when you lifted your head from the pillow. "i can write the e-mail myself, please focus on resting."

after some convincing, you gave in.

and so 10 minutes later, back at ouran, kyouya's phone let out a ting! with your full name on the notification. he'd already guessed you wouldn't show up to your appointment considering you hadn't come to school in three days, and already had someone to fill your place but left it for the last moment in case you did show up.

why? well you were ln yn, and it was painfully obvious you were smitten with his best friend, though he could say it was a bit different from the rest of the clientele.

probably due to the fact that you'd known tamaki for much longer than kyouya had. and yet tamaki didn't seem to have the same fascination with you.

he remembers when he first met you, when he'd heard that you were spoiled rotten and weren't even planning to enroll in ouran until tamaki did. you simply transferred to be with the boy.

literally everyone knew of ln yn's almost freakish obsession with suoh tamaki, except for the victim himself.

so imagine his surprise at the strictly professional e-mail he'd received from you, where not a single mention of your host was included. weird.

after glancing at the french boy in the seat next to him eating his bowl of some-sort-of-commoner-convenience-store lunch, kyouya quickly typed a response and informed the next girl in line that a spot was open 'for tamaki's hosting services at 15:35'.

"one of your appointments cancelled due to a personal issue. we'll have someone else fill it." kyouya told tamaki, just as stated in the e-mail, even though it was pretty clear you were sick, and he couldn't figure out why you'd lie.

"hm? oh, okay!" the brunet smiled and went back to devouring his meal, not thinking much of kyouya's words.

kyouya pondered if he should tell him the client was his loyal friend yn, who would never skip out on seeing tamaki, but he stopped himself, curious as to how it would all play out.

eh, if the twins could have fun, so could he.

"oh! haruhii! daddy's here!"

the hours passed so slow you were almost convinced time was frozen when you weren't glancing at the clock on your laptop.

the drama you'd been watching started to lose its interest after presenting the third plot twist in a row, annoying you with all the plot holes it left gaping.

sipping on your green tea (you'd been drinking tamaki's recommendation, pomegranate, only to throw all of it in the trash when you heard he gave the same advice to haruhi), you paused the show and sighed in absolute, tyrannical boredom.

by now you'd normally have finished your classes and walked to music room #3, your favourite among them all.

you'd be welcomed by a host and walked to a sofa to wait for your appointment, ignoring any other girl in the waiting area trying to pick a conversation with the middle child of the ln family.

and soon enough you'd be approached by your one and only taking your hand in his and kissing it to greet you, with his blue eyes staring up at you innocently like a man in love; a look he gave to any woman nowadays, it was second nature to him.

you got lost in them so often, he sometimes dared to ask you if you didn't enjoy his company and that's why you spaced out so much.

preposterous.

you? disliking tamaki? how could he think that after all these years you spent playing together, with you transferring to his school for his sake, swallowing your pride and becoming the client of a host for him?

truly an absurd notion.

currently, however, you weren't in the host club. you were just a girl with a bunch of germs crawling everywhere around her room, unable to go out and see the man of her dreams kiss her cheek and tell her to 'get well soon'.

speaking of, your mum grew increasingly concerned when she noticed the lack of communication between you and tamaki. you were always attached to his hip like some sort of koala, and the fact that you hadn't reached out to him to inform him of your illness personally so he could visit you made her worry.

but it was only natural that you'd suspect you were being an annoyance to tamaki once you began to notice his eyes shift from you to the newest host a couple of months prior. he'd been a petit brunet boy. a first year who was friendly and of lowly origin. you didn't think much of it.

at least not until the day hikaru asked if you could fetch something he forgot in the back room, completely ignorant to the fact that haruhi had come to the club early that day to ask for another uniform because she'd been accidentally thrown water at by two classmates of hers being stupid.

so when you opened the curtain and saw a small-sized girl with only her panties on desperately trying to hide herself from you, it didn't take more than a couple of seconds to put two and two together.

tamaki wasn't fascinated by the commoner errand 'boy' turnt host.

he wanted her.

you closed the curtain, giving the girl her privacy back and muttering an curt apology, "sorry." before deciding that hikaru would have to get his things himself.

neither haruhi nor you spoke about it again, and she never snitched to the host club about your discovery of her sex.

you liked to pretend it never happened, and that it never changed anything. but just like with tamaki, pretending doesn't go anywhere. the hints were there. his furiously blushed face when he stared at her, his protection of her when the twins teased her, his demands for kyouya to do things for haruhi because she'd like it, not even because she'd asked - well, the stage of denial didn't last long.

shortly after came anger. pure, unexplainable rage and envy. the fourth of the deadly sins was soon rushing through your veins like a drug you couldn't get clean from. 'why her?' you would ask in your rampages.

you couldn't figure it out, and you couldn't ask anyone either, because as infuriated as you were, hurting haruhi by revealing her identity wasn't on your to-do list.

not because you were a good person, god no.

rather, if tamaki knew you hurt his precious daughter - you barfed - like that, who knows if you'd see him again?

and so came the bargaining stage, with your rage never leaving your blood stream, of course. being petty was always one of your main personality traits, one that tamaki would often point out.

what did fujioka haruhi have that ln yn didn't?

'nothing.' you muttered to yourself.

nothing.

nothing?

could you be absolutely sure?

you didn't see her much outside of the club, and there were a couple of times you'd heard the hosts hung out together.

maybe they had a moment? or two, three?

perhaps it was high time you stopped bothering him. perhaps then he'd realise you were the one.

that's why your texts to him had much lessened, coming to a complete stop after roughly two months of your self-doubt and insecurities getting the best of you. so did your occasional visits to his house for studying. you'd even stopped wearing the perfume he got you as a birthday present last year, even though you couldn't find another scent that fit your tastes the same way.

despite your attempts at catching his attention, the bubbling fury in your chest rose once again when you realised that maybe tamaki didn't care about you at all.

he texted you as much as you texted him, he hung out with you only when you asked, and when he came closer to you and noticed the change in your scent, he went: "different perfume, princess?"

and while normally you'd be ecstatic at him noticing, your happiness was immediately destroyed when "the other one was a little old fashioned, good thing you moved to something more fresh."

why couldn't he say what he would have said had he been in an otome game, something among the lines of: 'did you wish to match mine?' or something cheesy like that? ...was your scent not to his tastes?

'did he forget his skills from hosting or what?' you whined.

consequently, now that you were sitting around doing nothing to reach out to tamaki or any of your 'friends', your mum couldn't help but take her phone in her hands to call her friend hitachiin yuzuha.

back in the pink room that is the host club, today's rendezvouses seemed to be going by awfully quickly for tamaki.

in the couple of minutes of break he had between the end of this rendezvous and next the one to come, he quickly found his phone from his back pocket and went over his schedule sent by kyouya.

your name had been crossed out and replaced with another one he recognised, another regular guest of his. he raised his eyebrow at that.

he lifted his head and looked for the shadow king.

"hey, kyouya?"

"hm?" kyouya didn't bother to look up from his laptop, furiously typing god-knows-what.

"why's yn's time gone?" he asked innocently in a curious voice that had you heard, you'd be swooning over.

"i told you, she cancelled due to personal business," his answer was straight-forward "although it's probably because she's ill."

ah, that makes sense, you were the one that cancelled.

wait, huh?

"what do you mean she's ill?" his eyebrows furrow a bit and he cocks his head to the side like a cute dog who doesn't understand anything its owner says.

"what do you mean, 'what do i mean'? she's been absent since monday because she's not feeling well, and she won't come today either. pretty simple." kyouya finally looked up at tamaki with a strange expression on his face. "has she not told you?"

tamaki shook his head a bit, "uhm.. no, not really." and tapped his phone again to check his messages on multiple social media apps to make sure he wasn't missing anything. his emails were empty too, only some spam from a newsletter page that he never bothered to cancel his subscription from.

"how do you know?" he questioned kyouya, but before he could answer, "no wait, don't answer that, you creep. of course you know." he sighed.

after some seconds of quiet thinking, "why didn't you tell me?" tamaki continued his questioning.

"everyone already knows, my lord." an awfully familiar voice butt in making the french boy turn his head around, resting his hand on his waist.

the voice belonged to kaoru, who had his arm wrapped around his twin's shoulders. seems like they also just finished with an appointment.

"what does that mean? who's 'everyone' and why am i not included?" tamaki crossed his arms, feeling kind of left out.

"that guy hayato or whatever who hangs out with yn and her friends was telling someone and we overheard." hikaru shrugged in unison with his doppelganger.

honey's soft voice entered the chat. "you mean hinata-kun? yn-chan's friend? yeah, he told me when i asked where yn-chan is because i thought she forgot to bring the candy she promised." he quickly grabbed a piece of cake from the fridge near where kyouya had been sitting and left the room swiftly.

huh, how convenient for him to enter for the plot.

"and why's it that you two evil bastards didn't bother to tell me?" tamaki exclaimed in disbelief, pointing a finger at the both of them. how could they? his precious childhood friend was sick at home and he didn't know?!

"sorry milord-" kaoru announced with his shoulders still raised, "-but you're always talking to yn-" hikaru joined, "-how were we supposed to know you're not asking her about her well-being?" they delivered the finishing blow together.

what were these lame jerks insinuating? 'not asking about her well-being'? what did they know? just as he went to respond with his usual barking, he stopped himself to instead text you on his own for the first time in a while. not that he noticed.

the twins looked at their king with a confused and weirded-out expression on both their faces, before glancing at each other and shrugging again, already disinterested. kyouya had long gone back to his work and so the twins walked to an empty sofa in an almost isolated area of the club, lying on top of one another to give a nice view to whichever client was into it.

about six minutes of pure silence passed between the two before kaoru's phone buzzed; a text from his mum.

the twins read the text simultaneously, with hikaru raising an eyebrow at its contents. they looked back at the slender boy texting you on his phone at the other end of the club, confused about his behaviour.

"seriously...?" hikaru quietly asked kaoru, referring to the text, only to be met with the other's puzzled expression.

as for the half-and-half boy, his fingers were anxiously tapping kyouya's table and awaiting your response to his message.

tamakiii ♥♥♥♥: Hey darling! Is everything alright? I heard you didn't come to school because you're sick. I thought you just didn't feel like coming. Why didn't you tell me?

he didn't know you let out a deep sigh at his text, even if it was three days late. it gave you hope - false hope. that he'd started to pay attention to you again. maybe being distant worked-

tamakiii ♥♥♥♥: want me to come over?

the question felt natural to him, you always visited his home but seldom did he ever visit yours. since you were sick, it made sense that you wouldn't come over this time.

yn>.&lt; : arent u busy rn tho lol

your name on his phone had obviously been put there by you, his choice of emoji had been party hat for some reason.

"be serious, what does that even mean, tamaki?" you'd asked him one day during a break from your studying in his room.

"you don't like it..?" he pouted like usual and you rolled your eyes.

"here. that's better." you handed him his phone back with a new 'yn >.<' as your contact name.

tamakiii ♥♥♥♥: I can just come after club activities.

wait, he was actually coming? after two months of your only contact being through your rendezvous? it worked?! it actually worked?!

you thought of how to answer him.

at your lack of fast response, tamaki thought of ways to help you feel better through your illness.

'aha! eureka!' tamaki's head echoed.

tamakiii ♥♥♥♥: I'll bring some commoner snacks we can enjoy too! Commoners have incredible food to help alleviate illness!

tamakiii ♥♥♥♥: What are you even sick with, anyway?

of course.

commoner food, of course.

haruhi's food.

yn>.&lt; : lol no its fine i dont want u to get sick. ill just c u at sxhool yn>.&lt; : school* yn>.< : doc said its just a cold but yk w my asthma n shit

tamaki was thoroughly disappointed with your response, what did you mean 'you didn't want him to get sick'? you'd never cared if you caught his cold.

his heart raced with worry, and he decided he would stop by anyway. knowing his next appointment was approaching, he speed walked over to the newest host.

"haaaaruuhiiiiii!" he waved his hand to her and her two clients, smiling widely with all of them smiling back at him.

"yeah? what is it, senpai?" haruhi looked up at him from her armchair.

"sorry to intrude-" he runs his hair through his locks - an action that you told him the ladies would swoon over, "-but i was wondering, do you have any recommendations for commoner food that sick people can eat?"

"...are you serious?"

[stilljuststardust]

Hey

Idk if you remember me but I sent you an ask before. Unfortunately i'm still miserable. I feel like the "you already have it" advice doesn't work for me, at least for shifting, and gives me mental breakdowns instead. There's so much stuff i'm sad about and idk how to get over the attitude that being sad = your manifestation won't happen.

I cry to myself about how much life sucks like once a week. I'm disappointed in myself that i've been on loa tumblr for like a year and seemingly learned nothing since I haven't gotten anything I wanted. Idk what the ppl that manifest easily are doing differently than me, or how to make what they do work for me. Idk what to do I feel like all the mainstream advice

I try to follow like "imagine it and chill out" or "you already have it" just give me mental breakdowns instead of success. Idk what to do i'm really tired. Please help

Hello again, I do remember you.

My perspective has changed a bit over this past year. I'm sorry that it wasn't what you needed then. You don't have to feel great, you don't have to feel anything.

It's not about doing everything right, you're just repeating something till your subconscious manifests it. You don't have to jump through hoops or suppress your emotions you just have to saturate your mind.

This is sloppier than I'd like. It's 3 am and though I've been thinking of what I'd like to say I'm a bit too out of it for it to come out how I need it. I don't want you to wait longer though so I'll post it anyways.

Similar post where I said all of this better

Also, I know you've read this before but you really should again:

It's ok to feel like shit

Your emotions don't manifest. If you just need to be told that I can say it as many times as you like. Half the stuff I've manifested I was cranky or anxious or mad when I did it. Half the time I didn't believe it'd happen and then it did. Half the time I felt how you do. You can do it. I promise.

I don't use fulfilment for the same reason you mentioned, stressed me out. For me personally it was vague and didn't allow me to anchor myself.

It's ok that you feel like shit. It's ok that you're scared. It's ok that you're hurting. You can still do this and I promise you don't have to magically defy your emotions to do it.

In terms of how to change the actual belief you just affirm the opposite. You learned it through repetition it's unlearned the same way. Anti-climatic I know. I used to have a rule that if I said something bad about myself I would repeat three things good. Maybe when you have that belief come up your repeat three reasons why you can feel like shit and still manifest.

Stop punishing yourself for having emotions. Suppressing emotions has never made them go away and I can tell you from experience it is a losing battle. You can feel them, it's ok.

In my opinion you need to take a break. Take that pressure off. Right now it's a burden of its own and it's just piling onto everything else you're feeling.

You need to take a couple days where you don't push yourself so hard. No methods or law or anything. Process your emotions and let yourself breathe for a bit.

Chill. Not as a method or a tool but just genuine mental health advice. I know taking a break won't solve the issues in your life but neither will beating yourself up every day. Ground yourself and let out everything you're pushing down because it is clearly weighing on you.

You have been putting near constant pressure on yourself for a year. In my experience the pressure you're putting on yourself is more suffocating than your actual feelings. The most painful thing is usually our refusal to feel it.

When I would suppress my emotions it felt like constantly running away from my life. I didn't feel better, the suppression just became an additional burden. We let out emotions because that's how they leave us. If we hold them in that's where they'll stay, inside of us.

Cry for an hour, throw a fit, write in a burn book. Give yourself permission to fucking feel. (You can do this even when manifesting something btw)

When you're ready to come back to manifestation don't return to emotional suppression. Feel what you feel just don't repeat the old story to yourself. What I mean by that is you are 100% allowed to feel like absolute shit just don't affirm for anything you don't want.

Get off Tumblr and get away from all the noise telling you what to do or shaming you for mistakes.

Stick to robotic affirmations instead of fulfillment . The only goal is to repeat a sentence/thought that implies you have it and avoid repeating anything that implies you don't.

Feel whatever you want, it's robotic because feeling is not a factor. It's a definable goal so you don't have to be constantly asking if you're doing it right.

10 minutes whenever you can just repeat what you want. That's your only goal do not add anything else to it. Don't try something new when you get anxious, stick to a schedule and take care of yourself. I say this because I think what you need is something solid to ground yourself with instead of a less defined goal.

Don't ignore your mental health in the name of living in the end. Living in the end is just refusing to affirm shit you don't want.

Your biggest obstacle is your self hatred. This is speculation but it sounds to me like when you waver or give into the 3D you respond to it by chastising yourself.

Maybe you have an unconscious belief that self discipline = scolding yourself or this is just your knee jerk reaction to mistakes. You can recognize the need for change without berrating yourself. Sometimes healing isn't linear, sometimes we slip up, that doesn't mean there is something wrong with you.

From a different post but I honestly don't think I can rephrase this better:

You cannot shame yourself better. Hating yourself, comparing yourself to others, being cruel to yourself because you "aren't doing good enough" has never helped you. If you only have one person in your corner it should be you. If you have only one person telling you to keep going it should be you.

On days when everything seems out of your control you can control how you treat yourself. You deserve kindness and patience too. It's ok if you have setbacks. It's ok if you got off track.

It's ok to trust yourself. It's ok to tell yourself you're good enough and that what you're doing is enough. It's ok to tell yourself that you're good at this.

You feel things very deeply and there is nothing wrong with that. Shame will not push you out of it.

You are consistently reinforcing the beliefs that you:

1. Are not good enough to manifest

2. Cannot change and

3. Will fail if you try again

Self defacing behavior is doing NOTHING but further a negative self concept/make you feel like shit.

You are good enough. There is nothing wrong with you. You do not have to become someone else to get what you want because you are enough.

Links

Manifest with anger subliminal

Manifest with sadness subliminal

Manifest with impatience subliminal

Success stories with robotic affirmations (aka without emotion)

My favorite manifestation video "you only have one limiting belief"

[tae-rambles]

OP ch 1120 SPOILERS

My reaction as i read:

hi Denjiro where did you come from? was he just on a walk or did he come to meet w Yamato on purpose? also he's the new daimyo of Kibi? did we know that already or is it a new info i cant remember

also i like how Yamato is like "no need for all this, its ok"

a flashback?

oh... never even crossed my mind to ask why was Clover arrested and let go so many times... thats clever

"answer to good and evil"? what does that mean

oh my god another D family! (how do you even pronounce that surname) i wonder which other characters we know of were/are hiding the initial...

i wonder what changed Vegapunk's mind to continue Ohara's research and risking his life if he couldnt understand why Clover did it those 22 years ago

hi Zeff, Patty :D

oh Robin... this is making me sad

damn Atlas...

wtf was that "snap" coming from Lilith

oh Atlas please dont tell me youre about to do what i think

good job Atlas but can ppl pls stop sacrificing themselves for at least five minutes my heart cant take it

but what about Stussy? she can skywalk so she might be fine?

the Marines are just so out of their depth lol

Luffy can hear Emet! :D Luffy's so confused lol

lmao Emet's immediately annoyed w him i cant

oh Emet, he's so sweet! i love himm!! "i've known Emet for only a couple of chapters but if anything happens to him i'm gonna kill Oda and then myself"

aaaah he's talking to you Luffy! but i like how Oda keeps emphasizing that Luffy is his own person, not Nika, not Joyboy, but Luffy

"but there are those who cannot be stopped" under the imposing worm Peter going in for an attack - love this visual storytelling

uh oh... Emet's rusty

and still fended the worm off! you rock Emet! :D

Saturn doing a jumping spider impression

dont fucking talk to the precious Kuma and Bonney you damn spider!

Atlas! D: my poor heart! this is just Pedro all over again

fuck off, York

dont you dare Emet dont you fucking dare! no more sacrificing yourself! no more blowing yourself up! i said no! D:< (also Peter bit off his arm :( )

oh, right, the general population didn't know Roger was a D

Great chapter as always :D, even though it was painful, can't wait for the next one...

i really hope Emet won't sacrifice himself here but it seems that's where it's headed... dammit!

EDIT: i've thought about this some more and was Joyboy really someone who would instruct his people to sacrifice themselves for him and his cause? that doesn't sound right. so maybe Emet has something else up his sleeve?

also, Emet is the second person to lose their arm to a snake-like monster while protecting Luffy. both Emet and Shanks were also waiting for the awakening of the Nika fruit to make their move it seems. i wonder if there are any other parallels between them...

[broodwolf221]

now for the spoiler-heavy reaction - ALL the end game spoilers

solavellan ending

harding died

bellara was blighted

got mythal's willing essence

got the special end-credit scene after collecting all the strange circles

the solavellan ending was particularly cathartic. in dai, all relationships get closure, get a sense of what's coming next - even in dorian's romance, where he leaves, there's a still a continuity. solas was alone in having it remain a giant mystery, and i think it was really, really important and valuable to have that relationship finally get closure. and i think it was good closure! nothing actually ends at the end of a game like this, things just change. we don't know exactly what form that change is going to take, but the inky and solas are now walking that path together, just like she wanted to so long ago (depending on your conversation in trespasser, at least)

harding... that was difficult. it was difficult to choose between her and davrin. but, like with everything else, i went with what i thought my rook would do. and in daw's mind, although davrin was a good fit to lead the distraction team, they still needed to make sure he got to the archdemon to take it down. i as the player figured that even if the leader died, there'd still be a way to beat the game, but daw ofc doesn't have the luxury of that perspective. so, harding.

that was so awful. so, so awful. and so painful.

same thing with bellara... daw is romancing her, but i also felt like daw - especially being a veil jumper - trusts bellara above anyone else for working with wards and complex elven magic. so, daw chose her to unlock the doors.

i was so glad that she survived. and that she recovered from the blight in the end...

and solas. oh boy, solas. solas solas solas.

switching places with rook

deceiving them time and again (and i - me as a person! - kept falling for it!)

but ALSO the dread wolf! we got to see the wolf! and also how ridiculously strong solas really is

and varric... i just. that was a lot. that was a whole hell of a lot. their ship just got so much more bitter and grim for me. but, honestly, i thought it was well-done; and as miserably painful as it was, it felt like a good narrative choice. everything did.

ik ppl have complaints but i honestly still don't? i thought i might, particularly about the veil not coming down, but with all the additional context, i feel like i understand why it didn't. why it couldn't. maybe, in time, after the blight, the titan's anger, has been calmed... maybe then the veil can be removed. solas has time to figure it out safely. time and help, at long last. someone he trusts at his side after everything has been laid in the open, after his greatest sins have been exposed, and all his new sins laid bare. after his corruption has been clearly demonstrated.

but there's always a chance for people! that being one of the core messages of this game, that means a lot to me. no matter what you've done, there's a chance to do better. maybe you can be forgiven. maybe you cannot. but you can still choose to do different. harding said so herself, and she's one of those who is particularly impacted by solas, particularly angry at him, and with good cause. but she still thinks he can be saved

and mythal! mythalllll. she released him from her service. i knew that was a big part of his character, but i don't think i realized how truly foundational it was for him. i still don't blame her more than i blame him or anything - they did what they did together. but he felt bound to her. he felt that. i don't think he literally was, but he certainly felt it. and she released him. and this from the angry, embittered aspect that had been sealed away

secret end credit scene:

this was really interesting, but my favorite part was when they referred to ghilan'nain as the storm. because suddenly, so many things clicked into place: she is the devouring storm!

[girlreblogger]

and then there were 3 💿

don’t get mad. i’m saying what needs to be said and this the last time.

the blk yn “stereotypical” stories are self indulgent and the relationships are unfulfilling and unhealthy. yeah. 

i never mentioned fully the stereotype thing that’s associated with blk yn fics and that’s because i have never really understood what ppl meant by it. and this isn’t to be funny towards the ppl that say that abt those certain fics.

i somewhat? get what ppl mean by yn is written as a stereotype when it comes to the toxicity in fics but because these stories are written by blk women for blk women who feel comfortable with those types of behaviors, dynamics and relationships i feel it shouldn’t be seen as blk women writing themselves as stereotypes because the comfortability with that idea of relationships comes from somewhere and it’s not no stereotype. 

stereotype: 1. a widely held but fixed and oversimplified image or idea of a particular type of person

that word itself just projects an idea on those ppl and (not to use a buzz word but) dehumanizes them. it dilutes and dismisses the perception and character those women see themselves as and i don’t personally think that okay. 

lots of ppl are accustomed to or find comfort in certain dynamics and behaviors for so many different and very personal reasons. (whether extreme or not.) without even knowing sometimes we all do or have because we are still ppl at the end of the day. so chalking up someone’s humanness to a stereotype is unfair to me. it’s the same shit that ppl did to us back in the day and still do till this day and i find it unnecessary to do amongst ourselves.

that’s why i chose to say the relationships in those books and fics are unfulfilling. the dynamics, behaviors and all that ain’t healthy. if we being real. and that’s more than just a stereotype. i also dk what ppl mean by her being a stereotype in particular. maybe being extroverted? ion know. 

but ppl who want to write those things are going to do what they want but that doesn’t mean..

blk women don’t deserve or that it’s impossible for us to have more exposure to more fluffy and healthy dynamics in books with us as the main leads (also all blk ppl cause not just women read books obvi and want fluffy romance that’s another convo tho). it’s also important we showcase blk girls in various ways because we all are very different.

**we should keep in mind a fictional! character we call blk yn can be a ya (young adult) so mistakes and learning experiences in fics aren’t always useless. (though it seems we’ve had enough of it im just saying)

with different ways of thinking, with different styles, quirks, and personalities. right now it’s mostly coquettes, bimbos, and baddies being written almost similarly each time. and that’s perfectly fine but i think there’s something else that ppl are wanting to see but i would like to know what exactly.

do you guys want see her in different styles? talking differently? as an ambivert or a shy girl? someone who doesn’t talk much or someone who does? like what would be the opposite of the “stereotypes” you normally see?

and how can we as a community make some kind of change to see ourselves differently.

those few ppl when i said “as a community”

don’t get quiet now. 

but honestly, because of that maybe give writers prompts and requests with what you’d like to read. there are many writers who always have requests open and lots of times those asks are some of their most popular posts!

ppl started only reading or getting used to smutty and plug books cause that’s all there was, (there was an influx at the time) especially since 2020. that’s also when the blk fic community began to grow so there were more blk fics and writers than it used to be. so maybe we can try and do that with fluffy, fantasy and wtv other fics. 

**also there are some really good books on kindle for you guys to try with blk girls as the lead that might be interesting for you. here’s some of my suggestions: sunny disposition! and excuse me while i ugly cry! (these are just from the top of my head)

i personally have noticed so much about myself from reading more wholesome stories and stuff so reading other fics or books sometimes isn’t for me. it’s books i’ve read that i look back at and see how much i have grown from what i used to be into. that’s why i don’t reblog as much anymore too because i want to find more that is more personally up my alley.

so yeah let’s just try and find and create more books that are healthier. blk girls deserve love, kindness, to be treated gently not weak (or a like a child) and have sweet stories. stories and portrayals that heal us.

we can have suspense, drama, mystery, ups and downs, and even rain but i think a lot of us just want the sunshiney stuff. maybe that way we can digest the suspenseful and dramatic stories (that aren’t toxic) in a better way.

like i said in my last post we read and write for comfort so i think we can use this as a way to heal ourselves as well.

ps. (even some “healthy stuff” can be unhealthy lowkey but that’s another convo) 

muah

also thanks for all the likes on my previous posts! i was nervous ppl wouldn’t understand what i was trying to say but the good feedback has definitely given me confidence!

no bars

[fictionfixations]

Kalim in RSA (and I get off-topic)

Spoilers for Book 4 and 5 (im sorry jamil enjoyers. but im so biased towards kalim its not even funny)

(this spiraled into me talking all about kalim in the actual game so oops)

imagine how different the story would be if kalim was in RSA

and we just hear from jamil about these snippets about his 'master' (although itd be weird they'd be separated if jamil tended to him often to where he'd prob be like his personal servant? idk what situation would have jamil talk to us anyway but yknow maybe we get close, he's like the other friend who seems cool? he'll basically help us out with knowledge about things, fleshing out the world a bit more, as the only sophomore in the group cause he kind of feels responsible maybe? then BETRAYAL)

and then eventually partway through the school year KALIM IS THERE (we know why though) and he somehow ends up housewarden.

i have a dislike against RSA. its very petty and its kind of because they keep winning (and they dont even mean ill intent which is worse! …but its kind of like kalims kindness. and i like kalim but that might make me biased. SO. thus the existence of this.)

we probably wouldnt like him much right? (and i imagine he'd get his fair share of bullies. we find this out. he laughs it off like 'nah, im used to attempted assassinations and everything. this isnt nearly as bad.')

(id do the clapping between but ppl get annoyed, and i get annoyed) CUE KALIM BEING MORE THAN SMILES AND WE LEARN THAT ABOUT HIM !!

HES aware enough that he can cook food good using JUST magic (which takes precision to use it as good or even better than your hands right??. its in his labwear vignette. ruggies teaching him ofc so ruggie wants it to be good cause hes taking leftovers, BUT CMOONNN he can learn. ..and yeah it took a few years for jamil to teach kalim antidotes to common poisons so he could do it easy but kalims hardly a master at making potions so i call that good)

AND in book 5 he noticed vil had like the same look as jamil to where he knew something was going to go wrong (aka the poisoning)

maybe its to show how much kalim doesnt belong in NRC and thats why they dont pull the 'more than he looks at first glance' like cater with glimpses in vignettes and etc

but like COME ON.

the sultan might be dumb (i recently re-watched aladdin) but at least he knew enough that he didnt want jafar marrying his daughter cause hes OLD and also he doesnt want to force jasmine into anything (good intentions. im sure if they just waited and she didnt find a suitor in time he would've just CHANGED THE LAW like he did IN THE MOVIE because he wants her to be happy!)

ALSo he tried to look through the law jafar claimed to say that would make her have to be married to the vizier or whatever (aka jafar) but then jafar just pulled it away before he could (and then attempted to mind control him when he refused) mans was prepared to spend hours reading over it even if he didnt understand it but he wasnt given the chance

also kalim is worryingly nonchalant about stuff. i mean. you can get used to horrible things to where they just feel so normal and uninmportant i guess? but poor bby. hes been like 'i want to keep myself alive because if i die then someone else will get punished.' or like about poisoning, if someone has a change of mind and hes already dead, then he cant do something to help them, so he has to make sure he'll live.

..i really doubt that hes just. so oblivious. maybe in denial, but still.

anyway i got very off topic. my bad. and to be fair we do get to see more of him at some parts. but hhh

okay listen. denial. (i am also a believer that if when kalim confronted jamil, if he said he didnt do anything kalim wouldve believed him. bruh gave him excuses like '..i just got tired, right?')

"The real Jamil would never do such things! He's a good guy. He's always helping me, giving me a shoulder to lean on, and—" (Book 4 • Chapter 33)

we just. dont see him really crumble?? he just. keeps being optimistic

we convince him jamil is bad. he resolves to punch him for being a traitor and THATS IT?

he sobs at the end of jamils overblot but then he goes back to being optimistic like 'lets be equals!' (..it feels like he didnt really learn much though as he's still 'I didn't notice--' 'I--' and i wish he couldve gotten more awareness. cause he makes it about himself yknow and blaming himself but COME ON put some blame on jamil PLEASE? or like. ANYONE ELSE. you also cant notice shit if no one ever tells you about it that you dont even know to look for it! he doesnt want to be cautious about who he can trust so like, why would he think to doubt the person who hes known his entire life??? especially if its something that was just always there that it feels natural, how could he know better? hes sheltered! so someone shouldve explained it to him, made him realize things! aghhh)

heres the book 5 one btw

"I got a real bad feeling when I saw the look on your face after Neige's rehearsal. It was practically the same look I saw on Jamil's face when he lost control of himself over holiday break." (Book 5 • Chapter 62)

And I mean maybe he did learn in that he's more aware of this now than others because he knows what people could look like because of Jamil, but I feel like a lot of things were just so unsaid. That the first time blindsided him, but now he's kind of a little more worried about something happening while he's there that he didn't notice so now he's trying to notice things more??? Or like maybe having gut feelings that he'd ignored before because it was Jamil but now knowing better?

So he can be aware. but then the rest of the time he's just thought of as dumb or an idiot or forgetful and it just makes me sad. and i mean i get that he wants to see the best in people but we never really talk about how its more that its denial. a refusal to see it, and i want to understand why

or maybe its because he sees the good in people that he trusts they'll do the right thing. or he believes that the good outweigh the bad (although i dont know if it'd be the same case if it was someone he knew who got hurt)

like. okay back in book 5

"Besides, I would bet there isn't a single person in Scarabia who hasn't gotten help from Jamil at some point. Am I right?"

"See? There you go. He's been a model vice housewarden. In fact, he's put me to shame. He let dark thoughts get the better of him for a brief time. Other than that, he's a perfectly capable guy." (Book 5 • Chapter 10)

He justifies it with that Jamil isn't the only one to blame (he also blames himself), and that Jamil hadn't done anything wrong before then

which. AGAIn. means that in his eyes the good outweigh the bad. jamils better at his duties so jamil should stay as vice housewarden.

this was the first time jamil did anything bad so it'd be fine, it was just an error in judgment

AGHHh

nothing about the fact that his closest friend he views as a brother

"He's grown up with Jamil since a young age, and considers him a brother in all but blood." (from the In-game Album)

who would be the last person he'd expect to do such a thing BETRAYS HIM, planning to make everyone (or well just the people in scarabia) turn against him

like. that has to be a shock right??? AND THEN HE JUST. welcomes him back into his life like it was nothing im just. kALIM. SWEETIE.

and i mean i get its for the best since if anyone knew what actually happened anything could happen to jamil (and jamil has his own reasons i get that but this is about kalim)

but he still hangs around him. has him as his aide. so while something did change, it also feels like nothing changed at the same time.

"I'm always chosen. Always. That's such an obvious truth that I never even consciously processed it. But now I see that was only possible because of Jamil's constant sacrifices. He created that "truth" in my mind by always holding back. By always letting me win. ...It stings. "Galling" doesn't even begin to describe it." (Book 5 • Chapter 30)

also like one of the very few times he expresses how he feels about something (how it hurts not to be chosen for the first time, and/or that he was only chosen because of someone else so he wants to work hard)

and then grim shuts him down with "You wanna talk about galling? Imagine how I feel not even makin' the cut for the audition to start with."

like. COME ON.

Kalim responds with, "Ah, you're right. My bad! I didn't mean to rub it in. Goodness, there I go again! I'm super sorry, honest."

and yeah it can seem kind of spoiled but also. its probably because of that that he doesnt want to share his troubles because he's very privileged so it feels like he might not deserve to act like its anything when everyone else has to work so much harder, right?

AND ITS JUST. REAFFIRMING TO HIM THAT his troubles are nothing compared to anyone elses and im just aghhauihduadhw

he also cares a lot about other people (people like him as housewarden because he listens to their troubles and supports them) so i just. want him to be able to take a moment to care about himself and just admit these things that he usually doesnt get the chance to.

i got a lot more worked up than i meant to

[puppy-phum]

tag game ✨

thanks for tagging me zey @thasorns ♥ i teared up at your addition about me, that is so sweet :( i miss our dff talks too! idk what you're into these days but would love to talk about some show with you again :')

-

1. why did you choose your url?

bc am obsessed with one (1) man who belongs to another amazing guy ♥ (been thinking about an url change lately tho bc i'd like to put last twilight and the hurt it caused behind me but haven't found something else to tie myself to yet. maybe we are and phumpeem if the ending delivers?)

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

not really. the only side blog i have is my og url vishcount saved for nostalgia purposes but there's nothing on that blog

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

started on this hellsite (affectionate) on the lord's year 2013 and it shows

4. do you have a queue tag?

i don't use the queue much so no. you will only catch me reblogging like ten posts in a row when am online/in the mood and then going back to lurking again

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? 

i was into a bunch of animes and tumblr was filled with amazing fanart. i wanted to be able to look at them in peace

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

to show who my url is about ♥ mork my beloved

7. why did you choose your header?

wanted it to fit the theme. also i adore the last twilight rooftop kiss, it's one of the brightest spots of the show

8. what’s your post with the most notes? 

most likely this the untamed edit from 2020. i was truly living my peak back then :'D tbh i feel like the whole of tumblr was living its peak when the untamed was airing and when we all lost it together for the longest time after

9. how many mutuals do you have?

way too many and i adore all of them, tho i probably forget or cannot recognize most of them. especially if you've changed your url/main fandom OR i have, we might not even know each other anymore haha

10. how many followers do you have?

more than i deserve and idk what all of you are even doing here but i like feeling like i'm part of some type of crowd ♥

11. how many people do you follow?

quite recently i unfollowed some inactive blogs and blogs about things i don't really care for anymore so my follow count is a nice number of 205

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

uh. i don't really know? do some posts from my finnish tumblr (suomitumppu) era count? :'D

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

am chronically online and i open this app like a fridge

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

no, not really. am not really one to share strong opinions, especially negative opinions, publicly online which i think is the cause of most arguments ppl have here. i'd rather just keep my peace and be nice

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts 

mostly i don't like doing things when am told to do them

16. do you like tag games?

yes! it always makes me happy to know that someone is thinking about me and i do find these a lot of fun to do ^^

17. do you like ask games?

also yes. i just don't often reblog those bc i don't really have a lot of interactions on this site. if i find an ask game with very interesting questions, i might forward it to kiddo @i-am-just-a-kiddo and we do it together privately to enjoy it like that ♥

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

the first one that comes to mind is hanyi @ruanbaijie who i think deserves all the recognition for her absolutely amazing giffing skills ♥ she's also the sweetest so idk what's not to follow, make her even more famous if you can!

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

nope. idk if i function like that tbh. i have some huge friend crushes tho and want to be closer with some ppl a lot! not mentioning names bc am shy haha

but i want to say that monica @stormyoceans is very important to me these days. she brightens up my days and makes my whole fandom experience so much better by simply being her enthusiastic and authentic self ♥ never change!

and also jessi @oswlld who i still cannot believe is someone i can call my friend and bestie on this site. i am so happy we've gotten to share bad buddy, vice versa, and last twilight together! also happy to hear about your life at times and to just share silly things with you ♥

third one i want to mention is shannen @icouldhyperfixatehim who always manages to stand out in a positive way. we don't interact much but i cannot help but feel very giddy about their presence on my dash. they leave the best tags and every time they reblog any of my edits with their tags, they manage to make me feel like i've made it and my edit was worth the effort :'D so thank you!

20. tags?

want to tag at least @psychic-waffles @foxofninetales @hils79 @sherrymagic @srnileforme and @thitiponqs ♥ also the ones i mentioned before are free to join and anyone else who wants to do this!

[hanzajesthanza]

Heyyy u seem to know everything abt the witcher and I wondered if u have some Witcher inspiring tatt ideas? Maybe ppl here like to know too.

I never had a tatt but i want to and i had some things in mind; the witcher wolf, or 'what is destined cannot be avoided' or a sword or, the Quen sign or; i know this will be from the show... but i love 'never lost, always found' its like a reminder that theres always hope, and we have the inner strength to keep pushing and growing. But its from the show and that also reminds me of the stupid changes they made and that henry left (hes the best. I know some in these community think otherwise but my friend knows him and I know the truth abt him & that he is awesome)

Do u know some other ideas?

long and complicated answer ahead, maybe not explicitly helpful as a list of ideas, but more advice-oriented

tattoos are veeery personal, so first of all, you should get something that feels good and resonates with you. i can’t say what might fit best, because only you can decide.

i also don’t have any tattoos myself, so it’s a bit of the blind leading the blind here, but i have strong opinions on the subject nonetheless. it should be something you will want, or at least be OK with, having on your body forever. i admit to it without beating that i am one of “those people” that believe tattoos should be meaningful. tattoos as fun self-expression, to my knowledge, are a relatively modern and western idea, and throughout most of history they have mostly either been used for deep cultural, spiritual, or ritual practices, or for ones of subjugation, like tattooing slaves or prisoners. maybe my problem is that i’ve seen more tattoos in textbooks than i have on people.

but, meaningful, not necessarily “deep.” it can be something important to you but to no one else. most of all, it should generate net positive feelings, because whenever you look down, at yourself, or in the mirror while naked, you’ll see it.

this is also why i have mixed feelings about fandom tattoos. some can be really meaningful, others tacky, but the worst are kinds whose meaning changed over time because of events outside of your control. think of all the people who had harry potter tattoos solely because they liked their favorite childhood book series, and then jk rowling started being a (more of an overt; nor saying she wasn’t before) transmisogynistic freak.

fandom is POP CULTURE, which means that its meaning is always changing and constantly being redefined. to afix something fandom-related which is permanent, you just have to be comfortable taking that gamble.

basically, you have to be “ride-or-die.”

personally, i love the witcher books, but i probably won’t get a tattoo related them for a while.

firstly, because i like my my natural skin, secondly, because i fear pain, thirdly, because there are too many aforementioned unknowns, and fourthly… to quote dandelion: “and, but, this is the fourth… we have no money.”

to illustrate how personal of a decision this is, i’ll share my own list. my list is this, if any of these things happen, i will start to seriously consider a witcher tattoo:

i accomplish something worthy and memorable for the fandom

i go to poland

sapkowski dies

i get a girlfriend and she wants to get matching roses

but that’s me. for you, you have to ask yourself why you’re getting it, what or who you want to honor, how will it make you feel…

i might recommend a swallow, which is an obvious witcher motif, but, by its association with ciri, symbolizes hope and rebirth, as you were interested in. and the quote “something ends, something begins” has always been my favorite related to resilience and new beginnings.

[kennysboxergf]

Attractiveness scale

Im trying to sleep at the moment but the sleep just ain’t coming ya know so im gonna post this and dip but I wanted to rate the Beta Squad members and a few of the guests by attractiveness for fun 🤷‍♀️

this is personal so like not who’s conventionally attractive but who is to me 🤭

the ten ppl I will be ranking are Sharky, Kenny, Chunkz, AJ, Niko (obvs) and then Darkest, Filly, Gib, HP and Johnny Carey cus i cant remember no one else

also no one talk about the spelling mistakes in this it’s late and i dont wanna spell check rn

Coming in on Number Ten its

10 - Harry Pinero

his hairlines reached the base of his skull at this point and he’s just never really been my fav guest so he gets last place unfortunately 😕😕 i think this is only bcus he violates my faves and I stand up against bullying thank you very much

9 - Yung Filly

ok yall gonna get mad at me for this one but he’s very bf material i cant lie just not very attractive for me? There’s some vids and photos where he’s like FINNEEE but then most of the time he’s mad funny and cute just not that attractive ya know and he looks like he’s 4’3”, like I KNOW he’s taller but he dresses and the way he moves idk he moves short af

8 - AnesonGib

ok so I had him 6th originally but I acc looked at pics of him and changed my mind, I have not seen a single Gib vid like from his own channel, ive seen gib in the Mafia vid, some old Chunkz vids and ive seen his fights but he’s so FINE and underrated as fuck like?? Appreciate this man?? And he seems mad kind. I <3 Gib. I do not know anything about him tho but I recently saw a vid of Chunkz from like 6 years ago with him in it and Young gib? Mad fine but also he looks almost child entertainer ish so do with that what you will

7 - Chunkz

aight ya ok, my BAD, im SORRY but like he’s just not it for me, he’s leng i wont lie but like he’s so authoritative and i cant with that ya know? Like I need a chill man for me im somehow worried this man gonna slap my neck if I talk back and im not tryna get treated like toddler im tryna be your girl? calm ur ass down and we talk

6 - AJ

ok SO I know, I know, im going to get absolutely dragged and maybe even jumped for how low this is but like once again he’s very aggressive and sh and I cnat deal with that, he MAD fine tho he’s so Hahrhdhhfbdnsk but like I rate the others better he is taller then me tho so he can have that

5 - Johnny Carey

YALL SLEEP ON THIS MAN, YALL ARE SNORING AND DROLLING AND EVERYHTING CUS THIS MAN IS SO FINE like I cnat deal with him he’s so fine to me? Like yeah he looks a little wonky and asymmetrical but like? Have you seen the wya he looks at people? Omgmgmmgmg

4 - Kenny

considerably low considering my username but ive developed as a person dont judge me but he mad mad good looking, when he boxes?? 10/10 in a track suit?? 10/10 this entire man is one big SMASH like ❤️

3 - Niko

this man is so cute but also hot its weird to believe he exists like?? I want to climb him like a tree, nuff said and maybe he IS a little lanky but he’s MY sorta lanky (ive always been this way, the nickname for my crush in middle school was lanky tree like taht legit what he called him and looking back he WAS lanky af)

2 - Sharky

Sharky, Sharky, Sharky where do I even start? I think the Sharky girlies on here have said enough for me, he’s hot, he’s cute, he’s nice, he’s funny what more do you even want? And he dresses so NICE and his smile is so SWEET and he’s CARING like omg I might fall in luv and his Hands. Thats it. Look at his hands my Lordy lord.

1 - Darkest Man

my bae, my love, I will defend his bald head for life, Aaliyah has SPOILED me by mentioning how fine he was cus now i cant Stop watching every video ever with him in it, ive watched FootAsylum, his own channel, Chunkz Channel, Sharky’s Channel, even JD sports just to watch him on my screen like he’s so funny I’m cracking up every other second and he looks good doing it too and the faces he makes and HIS HANDS omg dont even get me started heiwkwkskfb I cnat even he’s my no. 1 🫶🫶

Done

ok so taht was my list and now im gonna nominate my mutuals to do this too, you can go for the same guests or choose your own its entirely up to you but I wann see some more opinions so please do it 🫶🫶

Taglist- @b4tasquad @allygatcr @shuuuuush @vctrvn-ls

Sadly that is all my moots, I thought I had more but thats it I guess, I hope yall can find time to do this otherwise its fine 😭🫶