#like we're morons. like we dont know

[natjennie]

does anyone out here have a dad that isnt an asshole all the fucking time. like is it even possible.

[evie-sturns]

signals - Chris Sturniolo

summary: after you accidentally reject your best friend chris, he gets upset with you because you gave him 'mixed signals'.

contains: angst, crying, bestfriend!chris, arguing, fluff

----------------------------------------------------------

chris lays on my chest as we both mindlessly scroll through our phones, no words have been said in the past 30 minutes, we've just been enjoying eachothers company.

suddenly chris speaks up,

"i can tell you anything- right?" he says quietly, putting his phone down beside him.

i let out a small laugh,

chris and i have been best friends since our childhood, we've grown up together, we know each other better than anyone else.

"of course you can." i say, sitting up against the headboard. i run my nails through chris's silky brown hair.

"i just.. i just feel like over the past like- couple years, we've gotten much closer." he starts,

"and i kind of hate to admit this, because we promised this wouldnt happen, but i really, really like you" chris blurts out, his pale cheeks flushed pink and his blue eyes staring directly into mine.

"what-?" i laugh nervously,

chris goes silent, fidgeting with his nails.

"what do you mean 'what'?" chris says, his voice small.

i inspect his facial expression for any signs that hes joking.

"you're kidding- right?" i say with a nervous smile on my face, my heart beating in my chest.

"obviously im not kidding- im trying to fucking confess to you!" chris grows frustrated, running a hand through his hair.

i grab his hand and intertwine our fingers, in an attempt to calm him down.

"i- only see you as a friend chris-" i say bluntly,

chris's face falls,

"what?"

i clutch his hand tighter, chris looks heartbroken.

"im sorry-" i start but he cuts me off,

"i dont understand, for the past 3 fucking years you've been doing shit like this-!" chris rambles, pointing down to our interlocked hands.

"you literally led me on to the point of me confessing to you, you keep 'kissing up on my face and shit and hugging me all the time-" chris continues to ramble on, he looks angry.

"im sorry- im just a touchy person." i interrupt him,

"just a touchy person? friends don't act like us," chris starts up again.

"you dont understand how confusing it is to have the girl i like- yo! touching up on me every. single. time. we see eachother? does it not say something that almost everyone we know thinks we're dating!?" chris raises his voice,

"dont put this on me." i state,

chris stands up, "you never fail to make me look like a moron."

i furrow my eyebrows, "chris, you're just upset right now." i speak softly,

"of course im upset- you've gave me mixed signals for the past couple years!" his voice raises,

"i havent," i state,

chris's eyes are glazed, he looks like hes on the verge of tears.

"chris c'mere." i mutter, patting the spot next to me on the bed, urging him to sit back down.

"what are you gonna do next? makeout with me when i sit down? then tell me that its a friendly thing to do!?" chris yells,

im taken aback by his yelling, chris never yells at me.

"you're a real bitch y'know that?" chris says, his hands balled up in fists at his sides.

"chris-" i try to interrupt his tangent,

"no!" he cuts me off, his voice shaky and his hair now dishelved.

i watch as a couple tears fall down his cheeks, which he quickly wipes away with the back of his hands.

"look i think you should maybe go home- and sleep on this for a bit." i sigh, rubbing the bridge of my nose.

chris had planned to sleep over here, like most nights, but thats now been cut short.

chris covers his eyes with a hand, throwing his head back before walking out of the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

what. the. fuck.

"what just happened." i groan to myself, flopping backwards on the matress,

i hear chris lock himself in the spare room,

i feel uterlly overwhelmed, trying to process what just happened.

i dont know why i rejected chris so harshly.

i've never really thought of him romantically, its never been something that crossed my mind. but chris is a sweet boy, he gets along with my family, he's kind to me, most of the time.

hes also attractive, its embarrassing to admit, but my social media is constantly filled with stupid edits of him.

it wouldn't hurt to give him a try? give us a try.

-

(the next morning)

i dont remember when i fell asleep last night, but its currently 9:00am the next morning.

i groan as i peel open my eyes, the blinding sun shining through the curtain onto my face.

i sit up, standing up out of bed and walking into my bathroom,

i quickly brush my teeth, touch up my makeup, and fix my hair before walking out of my bedroom into the empty hallway.

my feet take me towards the spare bedroom, where chris is currently in.

i open the door, chris is laying across the bed, his phone in one hand.

"hey." i whisper softly,

chris glances up at me, his eyes puffy.

"im sorry about the things i said." chris mutters, looking up at me

i jump into bed beside him,

"ive just never really been rejected like that." chris says softly,

i nod,

chris looks like hes on the verge of tears again,

"you're allowed to cry, that was a pretty big night, wasn't it?" i speak to chris as though hes a child, which seems to calm him down somewhat.

chris nods, tears continuing to roll down his face.

"i just didn't sleep at all last night- and im so so embarrased." chris sobs, burying his face into my shoulder.

"shh- hey-" i whisper, stroking his back.

"you wanna hear something?" i ask,

chris nods,

"i thought about it last night, and i wasnt fair on you, ive never even thought about you romantically, but now that i know thats even an option ive realised that i think i do love you a lot chris." i start

chris tenses,

"maybe we could give it a try?" i ask,

chris looks at me and nods frantically, "y-yes! yeah!" he tries to play it off poorly.

i smile, "yeah?"

chris grins back, "yeah!"

i lean foward and pepper kisses all over his face, before placing a final kiss on his lips.

chris smiles against my lips,

god, this felt so right.

-----------

a/n: just felt like it tonight!

@starsturns234 @chrissturnsss s @joemamaaa42069 9 9 @sturnthepot t t @zayyluvz z z @realuvrrr r r r @livialifesblog @sturnioloblogs s @riowritesitall l l l @raysmayhem-72 @sturnsdoll l @obvisturns @stupid4sturniolo @meerkatzthings @witchofthehour r @rosalierenee43 @gabrielle-brun1 @ilovemymannnnnnn n @sturnioloxlver r @buckys-goodgirl @sturniol0s @ilovemymannnnnnnn @chr1sgirl4life @luanetaluenta @sturnsssbow @mattfangirl @luvr4miya a @luvtay111 @lolasturniolo @freshloveforthefit @ruedowney y y @lovingchrissposts @333michelle e @h3arts4harry y @jamiesturniolo o @chrisstopherfilmed @itzdarling @ @daddyslilchickenfingers2 @ev3rgreenxtrees enxtrees @certifiednatelover r r @solarsturniolo @mattsenthusiast t t t t @yomamaslays4lyfe e @peachmelbaesunpostre @alinaa131 @pepsiluvr0209 9 @creamoncreamoncream2 @szobofc c c c @mattscoquette @blahbell668 @sturniolo04 @bitchydragonparadise se e @sturni0l0tripletzz z 0 @ratatioulle @sturnsforlife v @mattsonly @justalittle47 7 @sunsetsturniolos s @downbad4reid @strniololoverr @obvisturns

@ellizzyy @colorthecosmos444 @mattspolitank @sturnblog @gabssturniolo @mattstromboli @sierrraaaasturn @milliegvrl @sturniolo-wife @ilovecats0402 @zayyluvz @urfavmattgal @eyelovedher89 @ireadstoriss @princesseva @edgemaster696 @itztimeeee @savvyratatouille @yourmama1 @kaisturni @angel4matt @arianatheway @mattsfavbigtitties @livelovelaughlanadelray @iheartblueyesxoxo @gloomy-ghoulz @megamorgan44 @stasiesturn @sturnzyolo @enemiestolovershoe @yomamaslays4lyfe @sturniolostrawberry @lizzysmith110 @jetaimevous @sturniolotripletsfandom @m4rriii @mayax2o07 @stellasturnzz @venusxsturnio @ana-sofia00 @flouqiis @lovekaiya @stayingstromboli @sturniolo-luv @theyluvme-2315 @annedebeijer @ashleysturn @flouqiis @bellaloves-drpepper @tpvmz @mattsbrowser @sturnrn @starchrisnam @rafecameronsbitch @zosturns @ashlishes @skysturniolo @littlemisswhore @olivialovessturniolo @1c3b4th @jmendez04 @melschapstick @starsturniolos

[stevie-petey]

blurb idea? stug isn't having sex yet obviously but maybe dustin walks into bug's room while they're lying really close on her bed reading together and he flips his shit like OH MY EYES and they're like ...boy we're literally just sitting here. and steve's over for dinner and dustin refuses to look at him and claudia's like ok what's up and you're like literally nothing he's so dumb

i love dramatic dustin with stug so YES !!

enjoy <3

"so jo just rejects laurie? like, flat out, brutally rejects his marriage proposal after years of being best friends and basically already in love?"

"i mean, there are some nuances youre missing, but yeah. basically."

"what kind of sick book is this?" steve shoves the book away from him in disdain. his nose is scrunched up, offended, and you refrain from kissing it all better.

you fix a piece of hair thats fallen in his face as he lays next to you on your bed. "jo and laurie are tragic, i'll admit." your words are rough from reading for hours. steve always insists that you read the books for him, he claims youre better at it, but you know its because he loves the sound of your voice. "but its what makes the book so wonderful, dont you think?"

steve rolls his eyes at you. "your obsession with tragic romances concerns me. what, are you going to reject my proposal next? make me beg on my hands and knees for you?"

"technically you already did beg on your hands and knees for me-"

"wait, you didnt say youd accept my proposal."

with a sly laugh you clear your throat and bring the book back up to your face, continuing to read. steve stares at you as you read the heartbreaking words aloud, his eyes travel the length of your neck and the slope of your nose. the scene youre reading breaks his heart more than hed care to admit. youve been reading little women to steve for a few weeks now. he really thought itd be jo and laurie in the end.

lost in the way you voice lilts between jos soft rejection and lauries broken pleads, neither you nor steve hear dustin calling for you until its too late.

the boy barges into your room and nearly shrieks his head off when he realizes steve is in bed with you. "my eyes!" he cowers to close the door, covering his face with his grubby little hands.

"dustin!" you shout at him, throwing a pillow at him to shut up him. hes being dramatic, you and steve werent even doing anything. your boyfriend is lying next to you while you read him a long and horrendous breakup scene from a classic book. if anything, the two of you should be doing literally anything else.

steve rolls off your bed and lands on his feet in one fluid motion before running over to your brother. grabbing dustins shoulders, he shakes him to try and stop the screaming. "hey! alright, can you quit it?"

"no! you were-you-my eyes!" dustin scrubs at his face with utter turmoil. he hadnt even known that steve was in his house. normally the asshole makes his presence known, stops by dustins room to say hi. its why he barged in in the first place.

had dustin known hed walk into steve in your bed, he wouldve brought a goddamn flame thrower with him instead.

"we were reading, you moron!" youre next to steve now, desperately trying to quiet your brother before your mom asks whats going on. hes already bad enough, but if your mother finds out steve had been in your bed as well, thered be permanent hearing loss.

"read at your desk! thats what those damn things are built for!"

steve shoves his hand through his hair, agitated. "oh, and who are you? the desk police?"

"'desk police'?" you stare at the teen, disappointed. "thats the best you could come up with?"

"im under a lot of pressure right now. cut me some slack."

"i want you dead."

both you and steve turn to dustin, shocked and disturbed by his words.

"okay, thank you for sharing your feelings, dustin." awkwardly you pat his shoulder. at least hes being honest and open with you. "not necessarily what i wanted to hear, but im proud of you for sharing-"

"he wants me dead and youre commending him?"

"not now," jamming an elbow into steves side, you shut him up and focus on your brother again. "now, is there a reason you barged in or can we go back to reading?"

dustins grimace on his face seems permanent now. his nose is slightly upturned, his eyes distrusting. narrowing them at you, he takes slow, calculated steps back out of your room. "dinner is ready," he says tersely before leaving entirely.

"well, this will be fun." steve sighs, and you nod grimly.

dinner is not fun.

dustin doesnt look steve in the eye the entire time. he sits as far away as possible from the teen. when asked to pass the bread, dustin pointedly ignores steves request and throws a roll to you. the bread nearly knocks your mothers water over and shes finally had enough.

"goodness, dusty! what has gotten into you tonight?" she exclaims, settling the glass that threatens to spill.

mouth full of mashed potatoes, his eyes light up evilly. before he can even think about opening his obnoxious mouth, you kick him underneath the table. your foot connects with his shin and dustin wheezes mashed potatoes all over his meal.

"dusty!" your mother gasps, alarmed. she looks at you in concern while steve snorts into his glass of water. "what is going on with you three?"

"nothing, mom." grabbing the bread that was thrown at you, you pick it apart with your fingers and make a delighted sound. "dinner is lovely tonight, by the way."

"i love what youve done with the mashed potatoes, mrs. henderson." steve is quick to add, jumping in. he makes a whole show of scooping up the mashed food and shoving it into his mouth, moaning in pleasure. "is there garlic in this?"

your mother, always easily distracted, claps her hands with joy. "why, yes! i wanted to try something different. do you really like it?"

"i adore it."

later that night you find yurtle the turtles mealworms underneath your pillow.

[livelaughwhump]

Masterlist

Yes! I love this idea! Sorry I couldn't answer the ask directly. After I saved it to my drafts, it wouldn't let me edit it again. @rosekins621

Content: mentioned past trauma, mentioned past captivity, regression, self-deprecation, self-hatred, former pet whumpee

-

Elliot stared blankly out the window as the world rushed by in a blur. The storage truck behind the van lurched over a pothole and Elliot cringed at the sound. He wondered if any of the team's belongings would be broken by the time they arrived. Fortunately, Elliot didn't own much, so it didn't really matter to him

"Are you excited, El?" Broderick asked from the driver's seat.

Elliot shrugged. Truthfully, he wasn't. He didn't like moving. He'd moved too many times as a kid and the process only served to make him anxious. Moving from foster home to foster home, then back to the children's home. That's what this felt like.

Lyra gently rubbed his shoulder. "It's not your fault we're moving, if that's what you're thinking."

It wasn't, but now that was all he could think about. "Aren't-Aren't we moving because of M-Master?" He asked timidly.

Yvonne shook her head. "No, of course not." Karine cleared her throat and nudged Yvonne, who chuckled awkwardly and said, "I mean...that's part of it, yeah." Elliot sighed and turned back to face the window. "It's just that Christian knows where the old safe house is. Our best chance at evading him is moving far away. Don't worry, though. The new safehouse is gonna be almost exactly like our old one."

Elliot glanced over at her again. "Almost?"

Yvonne pressed her lips into a tight line and flushed. Karine pinched the bridge of her nose. They were clearly hiding something, but Elliot didn't care enough to push the subject.

Lyra, of course, knew the real reason behind his reaction to moving. She gave his hand a reassuring squeeze. "Don't worry, sunshine. The only thing that's changing is our house. We're all still here and we always will be." Elliot nodded, but it was the only reaction he could muster.

The truck came to a sudden stop and Elliot felt his heart sink. This was exactly how it felt whenever he was forced to meet a new family that would inevitably give him up in a few weeks.

Lyra held his hand as the team spilled out of the van and continued to do so as they entered the house. Elliot refused to look at the house as they entered, but he could hear the echo of their footsteps bouncing off the empty walls.

"Elliot? Do you want to pick out your room first?" Karine asked.

Elliot briefly looked up at the hallway of open doors before them. He shook his head.

Landon shrugged. "Guess I'll choose first then."

Karine elbowed him in the ribs and whispered, "You know where you're going, moron."

Landon groaned. "Can't we re-vote? Why do I have to be in the basement?"

Elliot gasped upon hearing that final word and tears instantly sprung to his eyes. "B-Basement?"

Karine smacked Landon upside the head, which made Elliot flinch.

Lyra knelt in front of him and gently held his hands. "Sunshine, it's okay. It's nothing like Christian's basement. It's like a little hang out spot with a bedroom attached. It's fully furnished with a TV and a mini bar."

"But since three of us don't really drink, we'll probably use it as an extra kitchen," Yvonne added

"Speak for yourself," Landon said. "If I'm living in the basement, I'm doing whatever I want with that area."

Karine flicked him. "You need to stop talking," she scolded.

Elliot started crying. "I-I don't w-wanna go b-back in the basement. P-Please, don't l-lock me up. I can be g-good."

"Oh, sunshine. You are good. You're the best, in fact. We're not locking you up, I promise," Lyra assured him. "Why dont we show you so you can see for yourself?"

Elliot's eyes went round.

It's a trick. They're gonna take you down to the basement and put you in chains and leave you there for the rest of your miserable life. You'll never see the sun again after today

Lyra held his hand and gently led him to a door along the opposite wall from the bedrooms. "Look, it's right here. I'm just gonna open the door and show you, okay? I just want you to look. You don't even have to go down." Elliot's breath hitched as they started to turn the doorknob.

They're gonna push you down the stairs and lock the door behind you

Lyra opened the door to reveal a carpeted staircase leading down into darkness.

Look at it, mutt. Look at the darkness. That's where you're going. Down into the endless dark and cold, and you're never coming back up

Elliot started sobbing and instantly dropped to the ground, groveling at Lyra's feet. "No, please! Please, Master, I'll do anything! Please, don't l-leave me in the d-dark. I p-promise I can be a g-good pet. I-I'll sleep on-on the floor or-or even outside if-if I have to. P-Please, a-anything but th-that." Tears began to pool on the floor and his pathetic sobs echoed in the empty house.

"Elliot," Lyra gently said. Elliot Pet flinched and wrapped its arms protectively around its head. "Sunshine, it's okay, really. No one is going to hurt you and you never have to set foot down there if you don't want to, I promise. You're safe."

Pet was quivering uncontrollably. "I'm s-sorry, Master."

Lyra's heart shattered. Karine leaned over to Landon and whispered, "Go get Elliot's things from the truck and start setting up his room."

"What?" Landon whisper-shouted. "Why me?"

"Because this is your fault. I told you not to mention the basement and now he's in his pet headspace again," Karine pointed out. "He doesn't have much. It's just his mattress, his comforter, his bedside table, and his lamp. He needs something comforting and familiar, so go do it or I'll lock the door to the basement and you'll end up sleeping on the couch from now on."

Landon ground his jaw until he looked at the pitiful state that Elliot was in; the way his shoulders shook, the humiliating position he'd willingly put himself in, the tears pooling beneath his head. Landon sighed. "Fine."

As Landon left, Karine quickly ushered Broderick and Yvonne out as well until it was just Lyra and Elliot in the hallway.

"Sunshine? Can you look at me please?" Lyra asked. Pet did as it was told. It lifted its tear-streaked face from the floor and locked eyes with Lyra. Lyra smiled at it. "There's my boy," they said. "Can you tell me your name?"

Pet answered without thinking. "S-Slaves don't h-have names."

Lyra slowly shook their head. "Even if that were true, you're not a slave. Not anymore. I know you know it. What's your name?"

Pet had to think for several long seconds before it figured out the answer Lyra was looking for. Everyone on the team had their own nicknames for him, but there was one thing that they all called him. "E-E-Elliot."

Lyra's smile grew. "Good job," they softly praised. "Now, where are we?"

Pet Elliot glanced around the empty space they were in. "Our-Our new s-safehouse?"

"Exactly, and who am I?"

"L-Lyra."

She nodded. "And have I, Lyra, ever hurt you?" Elliot shook his head. "Would I ever hurt you?" He shook his head again. "So, what do you have to be afraid of?"

Elliot glanced to his right at the—now-closed—basement door, then back to her. "N-Nothing."

Lyra's smile grew again. "Exactly. I won't ever let anything happen to you, Elliot. As long as I'm here, you have nothing to be afraid of." Elliot nodded in understanding. "Can you tell me your name one more time?"

"E-Elliot."

"Very good. And do you feel more like Elliot or more like Pet right now?"

"I-I feel like E-Elliot."

Lyra gently kissed his forehead, a proud smile on her face. "I'm so proud of you, Elliot. How are you feeling now?"

Elliot thought about it, still glancing at the basement door. "I-I feel o-okay. Do-Do you p-promise I-I won't have to go down there?"

"I promise," Lyra said. "Don't think of it as a basement, okay? Just think of it as Landon's room with a downward staircase. Can you do that?" Elliot nodded. "Great. Are you ready to help unload the truck?"

Elliot's gaze wavered. "Can-Can you h-hold me for-for a little while f-first?"

Lyra smiled and opened her arms. "Always." Elliot crawled into her embrace and relaxed. She rocked him back and forth, carding her fingers through his hair.

Elliot couldn't help the smile that began to crawl across his face as he let Lyra hold him. He was still frightened of the basement, but he truly believed that Lyra would never let anything bad happen to him. If she promised him that he wouldn't have to go to the basement, then he believed her.

-

I hope you enjoyed this! This was a lot of fun to write. Unfortunately, this is going to be a non-canon drabble, as the team is not moving (for a very specific reason that I will be happy to explain at some point) but I do consider the end scene of Lyra comforting Elliot to be canon because I like to believe that Elliot slips into his "Pet" headspace every once in a while and Lyra is always there to help him out of it.

If anyone else has any drabble requests, suggestions, or questions for me or my characters, please feel free to send them to me!

Taglist

@l-antre-des-merveilles @pigeonwhumps @nicolepascaline @burningkittypoet @whumpinggrounds @suffering-and-misery @make-them-scream @honeycollectswhump @rabass @whumpdreamz @clairelsonao3 @rosewriteswhump @cepheusgalaxy @pinkraindropsfell @mj-or-say10 @considerablecolors @whatamidoingherehelpme @whumped4whumplover @ladybizarre13 @theaustralianfrog

If anyone wants to be added to or removed from the taglist, please let me know!😊

Or if you only want to be tagged in main chapters

[trapped-twins]

𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐓

hey guys! my names adam faulkner - which you might know me from my friend's band's blog @wr4th-of-the-gods.. lark taught me how to make one of these so i thought i'd whip one up for me and my brother david just for fun

before anyone asks;

yes, we are jigsaw survivors

yes, we are twins

no, we did not enjoy the traps

yes, we do work for jigsaw (unwillingly but yk)

no, we do not like scott

just thought id get that out of the way. christ what else?

i use he/him i guess - i think thats important. davids turn

Yo! I'm David, Adam's brother. Honestly, I don't know how to work this too well but we're gonna try. As Adam said we thought it would be fun. At some point we might drag our other brother on here but not yet. (we found him. thank you tucker) Adam kinda summed up everything so I don't have too much to say, but I hope we have fun and no creepy people get into our dms

hi guys...im back... most of my info is in the band blog but ill sum it up here hi! im annon! this is my second rp blog so i may be a little sucky still the boys are both color coded (if its not obvious), adam being purple and david being green both boys are apprentices - i might write out stuff about that..lmk if thats something yall will want

i see alot of stuff about specs being their triplet and thats still happenin! i have in fact watched his movies- i just dont play specs..a good friend of mine does! (their blog is in the tags, go follow them!) i own four other blogs - the band rp blog; @wr4th-of-the-gods zep hindle rp blog; @zippyzep jigsaws disciples rp blog; @jigsaws-disciples scott tibbs' mom rp blog; @coolest-mom-with-the-coolest-son and my main blog; @one-annon no major boundaries, interact how you want! I do prefer asks are from people 15 and up, just a personal preference. i am open for dm rps or plot rps! anything works, like i said i dont mind. PLEASE be respectful though. as david said, dont be creepy

TAGS adam ; #you dont really know why but you wanna justify ripping someones head off! ➸ ADAM ↪break stuff - limp bizkit david ; #i play russian roulette every day- a mans sport- with a bullet called life! ➸ DAVID ↪sugar - system of a down ooc ; #MANN GEGEN MANN! ➸ OOC/ANNON ↪mann gegen mann - rammstein blog ; #trapped twins blog roleplays; #watch out for that piranha! ➸ roleplays ↪rock lobster - the b-52s tag games; #i cant take what youre putting me through! ➸ tag games ↪you make me feel so dead - pitbull daycare headcanons; #i wrote you and told you you were the biggest fish out here! ➸ headcanons ↪lost in hollywood - system of a down duos ; #they'll never be able to separate jekyll from hyde! ➸ david and adam ↪confrontation - anthony warlow from jekyll and hyde the gothic musical thriller w/ @a-muscle-the-size-of-your-fist ; #im gonna give you my love - wanna whole lotta love? ➸ david and logan ↪whole lotta love - led zeppelin w/ @wrathofthegodsfrontman ; #to make things right you need someone to hold you tight ➸ scott and adam ↪tainted love - soft cell (cover by marylin manson) #team rocket is blasting off again! ➸ david adam specs ↪erm..team rocket? from pokemon? #she knows that im a man! she knows that im a moron! ➸ david and specs ↪go man go - alice cooper #and can you hear the sounds of hysteria? ➸ adam and specs ↪american idiot - greenday

[psychesetra]

why tf do parents go "but who will take care of you???" when u say u dont want kids

like wtf??

NO

i dont want to burden my kid like that wtf

every time my parents ask me if im gonna take care of them im incredibly close to saying no bc of all the shit they do

but i say yes bc they guilt me into itdo they just,,, want me to do that???

to my kid??

like

EW

no im gonna let my kid be independent and not have to take care of me i will not burden them

also i hate how society is collapsing on itself to the point where little children are incredibly compelled to male a change

and parents are lik "why tf ur grades a B+" SORRY MOM. SORRY IM TRYING TO DO MY BEST WITHOUT YOUR HELP SO THAT YOU GUYS STOP GUILTING ME ABOUT BEING TIRED????

and then they go "oh but the adults are taking care of it" EXCUSE ME??? WHAT ADULTS??? I KNOW MORE ABOUT THE DAMN ISR-PAL CONFLICT THAN YOU DO

i have so many funds in my blog but my parents don't know what the hell is going on

they BARELY understood the ch-ph conflcit even AFTER i explained it to them

its as if we're the adults now school is essentially the same as office work with the depression a lot of us have and then we have to deal with the political stuff our parents are too busy to think of and ACTUALLY HELP

as kids we CANNOT DO ANYTHING

WE'RE UNABLE TO BE INDEPENDENT HOW THE HELL ARE WE GOING TO DONATE TO FUNDS IF WE DO NOT HAVE ANY MONEY

parents smh

our parents only have three MAIN issues imo: work, family and money

kids on the otherhand, TEENAGERS AND CHILDREN are thinking of family, parent's finances, parents, their own schoolwork, their parent's work, and political shiz

i used to calculate my parent's money to help them

smh why are we making kids do things we can do why are adults allowed to laze around in the house in the excuse of teaching kids chores

DO IT WITH US MORONS

MAYBE THEN WE'LL LEARN

actually the simple fact we as children can understand all these societal problems is terrifying

parents literally tel us "when i was your age i was playing outside lang" EXACTLYYOU DIDNT WORRY AVOUT IF YOUR DAMN COUTNRY WAS GOING TO SUFFER WAR

OR IF ANOTHER WAS GOING TO BE WIPED OFF THE MAP

parents complain and complain abt their kids but they fail to see the incredibly big picture that their kids are doing more for the world than they are AT THE AGES OF 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, WHATEVER DAMN AGE IT IS THEYRE DOING A HELL OF A LOT MORE THAN THE 40 YR OLDS STUCK IN THEIR OFFICES WHINING AND WHINING

sorry i just needed to stop choking on that

idk what to tag but pls reblog if you see this

[chloeangelic]

I gotta rant about Rendezvous for a second lmao

If reader doesn’t get a happy ending for herself in it then honestly, Joel shouldn’t either! I know everyone is yelling about reader, how she’s embarrassing and delusional and desperate and all that. And yeah sure she is. But at least she has the excuse that she’s young and dumb lol

Like, what’s Joels excuse? And why are people acting like Joel is such a good guy??? Like yay, he deserves someone like Katy!! Like??? The guy knew his best friends daughter has feelings for him, fucked her once, fucked her twice (without a condom!) leaves her afterwards without ever once checking on her and then goes out with Katy. Like, that’s such a shitty thing to do?

Sure nobody is innocent in this and reader is old enough to make adult choices. But reader isn’t the “bad guy” here? Joel low-key manipulated her, used her and then just dumped her when he got what he wanted and that’s fucked up but almost nobody wants to admit that lol.

But hey, congrats Katy. You’re dating a real stand up guy there!

Rant done lmao

I’m sorry to dump this in your inbox (and absolutely nothing against you! I absolutely adore your writing!! It just pissed me off that so many are going after reader but not joel!)

i always welcome opinions on rendezvous! and thank you <3 <3

people tend to pick sides in this series - understandably so - either giving the reader shit for making an ass out of herself or joel for being irresponsible. i personally dont think there's a bad guy in this situation, and i actively try not to assign characters good/bad values cause i think it oversimplifies the story

we're lacking joel POV in this series, which i think skews people to take the side of the reader, but as the series creator i can tell you that joel is definitely suffering. itll come through more in pt 4 and 5, but he very much hates himself for the decisions he's made and how hes handled it.

imo, they're both able to send a text saying "Hi, can we talk?" but neither of them are doing it, so theyre being morons

[ilikemicrowaves]

@grrgrrgrr finally finished the fanfic! Sorry if there's any mistakes or misunderstandings about the au! Hope you like it.

Setting:Pizza restaurant

As decative Duck and Red walk into the doorway of the pizza restaurant the smell of pizza and breadsticks wrapped around the air. They sat down at their table and looked at the menu for a while.

"We only have 50 bucks so we gotta make this cheep."

Said Duck.

"They have pineapple pizza for only $12? Make that shit crap 50 cents its horrible."

Said Red.

"I say we get the pepperoni pizza with breadsticks and water for only $23."

Said Duck.

"Wait, if it's only $23 that means we're only getting 1 basket of breadsticks, there's only 4 per basket you moron. An extra $5 ain't gonna hurt."

Duck and Red argued back and forth until the waitress came to get their order. The waitress was almost as short as Duck but a little bit higher. She wore a small green beanie that said "Food Gang" on it.

"Hi, are you guys ready to order or do you need a minute?"

Asked the waitress.

Red glared at duck. Duck sighed and ordered.

"We'll have the pepperoni pizza with two baskets of breadsticks and some water please."

Said Duck.

"Alright, your water will be out shortly and the pizza will be about a 20 minute wait."

Said the waitress.

The waitress walked away and into the kitchen.

"She looked familiar didn't she?"

Asked Duck.

"Hmm, kinda but why would it matter anyways? We have work to do after this, we can't stay and talk."

Said Red.

"No, no, not like an old friend or anything, one of our suspects."

Red thought for a bit.

"Yeah I quess your right, but were on break and I'd prefer to actually sit and eat and not terrorize a food can in case she's not one of our suspects."

Said Red.

"You still have the files with you right?"

Asked Duck.

Red sighed and grabbed his bag.

"Guess breaks over."

Red mumbled to himself. He pulled a file out of the bag and placed it on the table.

"Sally Spinach Can" it read. They opened the file and started reading

"Oh, she's a 17 yrs old. Why would they put her as a suspect for kidnapping two adults?"

Asked Red.

"Maybe because she's been in a gang that kidnapped people and force fed them?"

Pointed out Duck

"Oh, wasn't expecting that. But she seems a lot better though, how long ago was that?"

Asked Red

"4 yrs ago."

Said Duck.

The waitress came back with the waters. She saw the files and dropped the drinks.

"Oh, so your the investigators I've been hearing about."

Said Sally.

Duck and Red looked at each other then Sally.

"Um yes, mind if we interview you for a moment?"

Asked Red

Sally sighed and grabbed a chair from another table to sit.

"I know why your here."

She said gloomy.

"Oh, well can you tell us where you were the night Lesley went missing?

"I was at my friend Betty's house when we where having a girls night."

Said Sally.

"How do you know Lesley?:

Asked Duck.

"I ordered some Yarn from her for a school project me and Betty were working on. I new her husband Roy who was a puppeteer that I bought some puppets off of."

Answered Sally. Sally Ansered every question they had until a loud DING was made.

"Sally, the breasticks have been sitting here a while! What are you doing?"

Asked a strangers voice from the kitchen. It was Franky (the fridge from dhmis 5)

"You know Steve's not gonna be happy if he finds out"

Said Franky.

"Sorry!" Said Sally. "I'm getting them right now."

Sally got up and grabbed the breadsticks.

"Sorry about that guys."

She said.

"Don't be,"

Said Duck.

"Your busy being interviewed by us."

Sally sat back down.

"Is there anything else you need me too answer?"

Duck and Red looked at the files.

"I dont think so."

Said Red.

"OK, I'll go get you more water."

Sally picked up the cups and straws off the floor and threw them away. She grabbed some paper towels and wiped up the water.

"Heres your water."

Sally sat the new filled cups on the table.

"Thank you,."

Said Red.

"By the way, do you know where we can find this guy?"

Red pulled out a picture of somebody who seemed to have a Computer for a head.

Sally studied the picture for a bit.

"Beats me, but my dear friend Franky might!"

Sally went into the kitchen and came back out with Franky.

"Hey, I'm Franky."

He said

"Do you know the guy in this picture?"

Asked Red once again.

"Hmm.." Franky searched through his brain for this familiar face.

"Oh, that's Colin. He owns a CD shop a few blocks from here. He's a really nice guy."

Red put the picture back in his bag.

"Thanks for the help."

Red said.

Suddenly a the loud sound of pans falling came from the kitchen.

"Oh no, I think that kids back."

Said Sally

Franky ran to the kitchen yelling "Hey you can't take that!"

"Kid?"

Asked Duck.

"This yellow guy keeps sneaking in the back and taking our pizza. I've tried to catch him so I can get him something to eat without stealing but he's too quick."

Duck and Red looked at each other with realization.

"Do they have blue hair?"

Asked Duck.

"Yeah, how did you know?"

Asked Sally.

Red looked at Duck.

"We got him."

Said Red.

"What?"

Asked Sally.

Red and Duck got up out of their seats and headed for the kitchen.

"That's Lesley and Roy's kid, he Escaped the orphanage about a week ago"

Said Red.

"Oh, well go him hurry!"

Said Sally

Red and Duck ran to the kitchen and out the back door were Franky had the kid in a corner by the dumpster in the alley way.

"I'm not gonna hurt you, come here and I can get you food."

The kid hesitated but took a step closer. He seen Red and Duck and ran through Frankys legs to them. Red lifted his arm as the kid hid behind him.

"Looks like he likes you"

Said Duck.

"Oh, hey their little guy, uh, his name was David right?"

"That guy is scary."

Said David

"I'm scary?"

Asked Franky.

"We need to get you back to the orphanage bud, it's safer there."

Said Red

"No! I don't wanna go back! Their mean to me!"

Said David

"Let's get him something to eat, he looks hungry."

Said Duck.

Red guy looked hesitant, but picked up David.

"You know what," Red said. "Your right, then we go to the orphanage.

The word orphanage made David whimper.

"Please don't make me go back, it's scary there."

Red and Duck looked at each other.

"I would love to stay and chat but I think your guys pizza is burning."

Franky ran inside as the smell of burnt pizza filled the alley way.

The smell made David's stomach growl.

"Can I have um, can I eat pizza?"

David asked.

"Of course, you haven't eaten in days have you?

Red, Duck, and David went inside and sat back at

the table.

Sally brought out the pizza and sat at the table.

"Thank you"

Said David.

"Aww, he's adorable. Said Sally. "Where's he going after this?"

Asked Sally.

"I think I'm gonna take him to my place, if he's really scared of the orphanage than I'm not gonna send him back."

Responded Red.

Duck, Red and David finished their meal and headed out after they paid.

"Come back sometime soon! It was nice meeting you guys."

Said Sally.

"We will."

said Duck

"See ya around."

Said Red.

"Bye bye Sally!"

Said David.

They all walked put the door into late night not knowing what was a head of them.

[petorahs]

☀️ anon

Thank you for pointing out that ryuji has the highest EQ, he really is super perceptive even if he is incredibly book dumb and impulsive. PROTECT THIS BOY

(He is a loud teenager tho so he gets often just stamoed as being "annoying" which i dont get because he feels so vital to the whole gang)

exactly! you get me sunshine anon

ryuji being "annoying" and loud are just his core personality traits yeah like you said he is a fairly real depiction of a modern teen guy. HES JUST A FRIEND MAN i cant hate him sure he messes up (like constantly yell out "we're the phantom thieves!" in public and the somewhat forced imo mean comments to morgana) he just feels like those homies you have irl like. a light slap to the head is needed sometimes and thats ok

with his EQ though i especially feel this cause i recently rewatched futaba arc and theres this part where a confused-skeptical-but-well-meaning ann asks futaba outright if she "murdered her mother?" and ryuji was immediately like "ann wtf you moron??!!" cause ofc thats a loaded ass question towards a stranger who's also a depressed sewerslidal child. yusuke simply said "ann." in getting her to stop but this scene highlights the EQ hierarchy of PT i feel. ryuji is so very outwardly empathetic and we see this a lot in futaba arc

in JP, his quiet and awkwardness in the beginning shows way more like he's actually really self-conscious about how he's perceived by others at school before he opens up..... you know that moment when someone talks about their passion and they light up like fireworks? start talking all animatedly? that's ryuji with the PT! he gets so pumped talking about it cause it essentially is a passion for a once-lost teen like him. cant really blame him for being loud sometimes

finally i believe the EQ in the phantom thieves goes like. ann = ryuji = joker > haru > yusuke > mako = futaba > morgana maybe this needs more work lol but i do think haru's pretty high up there just that she's offset by being more sheltered than the rest so some casual social cues are lost on her. yusuke is more emotional despite his calm demeanor and mako and futaba are strictly numbers and data gals etc etc

[celticvampriss]

Every episode of Succession be like: Are they gonna make the deal? Should we do the deal? How about Pierce, what do they look like? Let's see if Stewie wants in. You want a part of this? Look, here's where we're at. Fuck Pierce, we dont need them. Are they gonna play ball? But do they want in on this deal and maybe we should go with Stewie on this deal, that feels smart. That feels like the right move. And you're a fucking failure of a son, my kids are fucking morons And what? Its not that i dont love you, cause i obviously do, like, you know that, right? I mean, but its, you know...complicated and hey, greg, greggy, greginator and perverted innuendo to hide emotional scarring and there's a wedding.

[deviantartdramanow]

Get this through your thick skull club

Since diaper boy loves to repeat his bullshit mantra  and ignoring what we are trying to explain, we're going to keep repeating this back to him in a more watered down way. Ahem. *pulls out a hand puppet to make it talk in a loud cheery kids sitcom voice so club pays attention.* "Hey rping is fine and dandy with younger rp partners, but NOT when it's subject matter like fetishes that are considered sexual. All fetishes are sexual too since they arouse the person who enjoys the fetish! There is no INNOCENT fetish boys and girls!" *puppet points at monitor screen at Club.* "So dont rp fetish stuff with minors, it makes them feel uncomfy or scared to talk to others. It is NOT educational! Leave that to the parents or teachers to show their kids what diaper changing is and handling kids with disabilities is since they know how to handle those subject matters! What you are doing is highly immoral and illegal no matter how many times you say it's good. Also there's this!" *pulls out rulebook of DA" "Fetish and nsfw rps are forbidden on DA, no exceptions! It's why you were suspended twice before Club! Also do not make journals on others, block and leave them alone. Also stop doing rps with minors and getting upset when they say no. No means NO. No gaslighting, or guilt tripping. I mean, would YOU like if someone pushed you into something you did not want to do?" *puppet folds it's arms looking disappointed at Club.* "So respect the wishes of others, stop bullying with rps, and NO. MORE. RPS. WITH. MINORS. INVOLVING. DIAPER. FETISH." *Puppet pulls out a sign that has a X over it with RP showing a kids face.* --- There, ya fucking understand now that we had to dumb it down for ya moron?

[lintwriting]

[Image ID: A screenshot of tumblr tags. It reads as follows:

“#for fucking real #my family calls me gullible but like motherfucker I don't expect you to lie to me you're supposed to be a trusted family member #so you wanna betray one of the fundamental principles of trust and make it seem like it's funny? fuck you. #people tend to not respect kid's wishes and general intelligence #and this pisses me the fuck off. #i have multiple memories of being treated like a fucking idiot just because I was a toddler and they piss me off to this day #I'm twenty five and sometimes family members still lie confidently and laugh when I say "ok" #thankfully they know I'm not a fucking idiot and they clarify immediately after "Dude I'm lying I have no idea what it really is" #and I can shrug and say "well do you expect me to read your mind?" #meh”

./End ID]

(Prev’s tags)

It makes me so mad because I read through the notes, and it’s so clear that many of us have been hurt by this form of humor because it specifically relies on things autistic people typically struggle with—

Reading social cues like body language or tone

Not taking everything literally

Understanding when something is sarcasm

—and then acts like we’re the stupid “party poopers” for not getting it.

Here are just SOME of them:

[Image ID: A screenshot of Tumblr tags. It reads as follows:

“#for fucking real #this is why if i do this style of humor i always do it so exaggerated it's obvious it's a lie (and if i'm worried i'll still follow it with #'this is a joke') #also also #there's just an assumption of familiarity #that you will be able to read the sarcasm or whatever #ESPECIALLY with family”

./End ID]

[Image ID: A screenshot of Tumblr tags. It reads as follows:

“#i understand a lot of the sarcastic sort of stuff because its contextualized a lot of the time #to be fair i can understand tone better than some people i know but its like :oh got sushi without me? wow i hate you: and they laugh #friend doesnt actually hate me: theyre just envious of my sushi. she laughs afterwards and we're okay”

./ End ID]

[Image ID: A screenshot of Tumblr tags. It reads as follows:

“#and then they lie about something they dont need even need to lie about and then laugh at you for being "gullible" #"yeah im planning on getting (x) job soon" oh that sounds nice "YOU IDIOT. YOU FUCKING MORON LMAO. YOURE SO GULLIBLE" #killing you with hammers. killing you. fucking killing you.”

./End ID]

[Image ID: A screenshot of Tumblr comments. It reads as follows:

“i mean not to sound like a party pooper but maybe there is a place and time (so, context) for such things. if we were holding a regular conversation prior to that and not goofing off then of course i'm going to take your words seriously. jeez. that's half of where my family comments on me being "naïve" come from, and for what”

./End ID]

[Image ID: A screenshot of Tumblr comments. It reads as follows:

ive complained abt this to my friends a couple times in the past too! i dont get it. saying something bizarre (either by common standards or by their standards) with a straight face that i regard as factual information then cackling @ me for what, believing them? what a fool i am. to trust that the info you just shared is legit

./End ID]

why is so much of allistic humor just Lying -_-

[sherlockgracie]

Sometimes, you just feel sick. I think it's normal, the intensity in my stomach. I want to vomit. I want to vomit. Ouch I typed that twice

Don't be a idiot

Okay so I've been you fucking moron, how is this supposed to make sense if you don't differentiate between us

Okay well that's not helpful

What do you want us to do?

Idk he started it

Okay then he should make a suggestion

Let's use different punctuation? Er symbols, at the beginning of our sentences?

~yeah that probably works

+Motion Seconded, though I don't like how long it's going to take us all to figure out which symbols to use and how to get their hands to do it in a timely manner

~it simply won't be timely then

+Yeah yeah I know

!Okay so how will they (the reader) know which one is the original

There is no original dipshit, we're all one and that's the point.

^Dont go starting fights again! Please

—For all our sake, let's keep things civil right now

+Also we don't have to use parentheses in our sentences to each other, We can Understand the intentions of our words

!But this is a post on Tumblr so like it's not just for us

Guys can I continue my original train of thought now

~yeah, go ahead, we won't stop you

Anyways I've been thinking a lot about the concept of devotion and obsession. Things I understand very personally

!Yeah you fucking freak,

+let's keep those thoughts to a minimum while where in text mode please, I know you had more to say but we don't have to do that

~i agree

!Okay fine, you got me. Just don't blame me when

—No

I just wanna get it out.

We good?

Okay cool

Anyways, I think the ideas of Knights are important to me. I think I wish I could be bound to the service of another. I remember wanting so badly to have someone to say "My liege" to. Obligation, devotion, servitude, obsession.

I think that's love? I think love is the overwhelming obsession with something else to the point of destruction of self. Er, not self perhaps, but what could be considered a portion of self.

When I feel what I think is love, it's so intense in a way that scares me. I stop feeling like myself. I feel like someone else. I want to vomit.

+don't get stuck in a loop again! Loop again!

Loop again, loo again loop again loop again

=Bastard, you purposely did that

+I'll never tell

Sorry sorry

I'll stay on track better

I want to vomit

So how can I exist when occasionally I want to shed my skin and become someone else. I want to vomit. How am I supposed to be myself when I find myself wanting to start over

Am I jealous? Or is it just, obsession. What's the difference? A lot probably I don't want to think about it right now I want to vomit.

I can close my eyes and imagine it so vividly. All of them different. I can become them in so many different ways, but it has to be unique to them.

Salivating

I want to vomit

No shut up, you guys don't get to talk right now. I'm not letting you, keep it to ourselves.

Fuck

I want to vomit

I need to be in service to someone now. I need to

I just can't stand aimlessness. What is that thing Suvi said? The wizard Sky. I'm going to go find the quote give me a moment

"I don't know the right thing to do. If I know I'll do it."

Not a nice moment for our wizard, but one I related to, so much. It was said through choked tears and a mental breakdown.

I realized recently that I have a thing for religious fanatics in media. Not ones in real life. But I played a game and fell heavily for a cult leader. Something sm appealing about someone truly believing in something with all their heart, that it is right and true. And I think that's why it will never happen in real life, I don't think people really believe in something fully and truly. But when I am in my media and I see the character kill someone for the sake of their zealotry, I feel, heavily.

I think it's probably fucked up and wrong which is why this is here on Tumblr. Though it really belongs on a main account or in my permanent drafts. But chances are if you got this far in reading it uh. Its probably fine. You don't care, and I don't care though I do. Anyways hi you, if you don't see this then don't worry about it.

I don't want to vomit anymore.

Do you think I'll find someone to serve? Do you think I could become a devoted Knight? I really like Suzaku from Code Geass. I need to finish it. But he is what I mean I guess. maybe. But he is noble in the sense of being, though I guess he is technically also a noble in a bloodline sense. I mean I think that I am not as good as he. I wouldn't be so kind if I were a servant

I think I'm done with this ramble for now. I should probably figure out my identity right now.

We're stopping now Aisling

You called me by my name

Took a minute tbh

I appreciate it still

Good night Aisling

[the-firebird69]

The Lady Bogue. Bogue. The Lady Bogue. She touched our son down the stairs. Was threatened into it. And people could not tell by who.. And we understand it was frightening. And people thought that she was Melissa and she's not. And there's a reason why he. was get the canaM. and it's a spider. And people should figure it out who are ours. It's Canada and America and a spider. but their reasoning is for him to get an accident and for them to hold him in a hospital under threat. And that's what they want to do. And they've been trying to do it the whole. time. And it's really these pseudo empire. And they're going to all pay for it. But the thing is that nothing happens. And he says, so something happens. to Camilla. But really, there's no direct tie to him. at all. And there is a weak one. It's really kind of lame. So we're not really sure how that would happen.

Hera

So there are arguing and talking and. he thought she had an answer and so forth, but not yet. And the reason he would get someone else's bike doesn't make sense. except for inheritance. And it's used. and he doesn't really ride. So people try to figure that out It's the same with the slingshot. We do know what happens and how it happens and he has a lot of aunts and uncles. And he says Connie chasse, looks a little odd. A lot of people think that. she might be a shoe in for Camilla but she would have to pass on. And that's not what happens. Camilla is hit and she doesn't look like herself. She looks like Gareth's sister.. And he's related. but distantly. and they never discussed it. So it's going like that so far.

Thor Freya

I just thought of something We're kinda talking about it, but we're not. And if I had a Web Trike, I wouldn't want him to have mine. without his father in law and the analogy is probably irresistible. And I'm most likely be back if something were to happen. But I do know. that this lady Camilla she had contact with our friend here. And it was as an aunt. as herself practically. And that's what they want. And she was an aunt who is from New York. And she came by the house. and he has no recollection. It was in Westboro and says I don't remember it. I The. he says I recall the African American family and doesn't look like here. That's another thing too. The Gentry's were just friends. This lady came by and was an aunt. It was back in the 70s. Now it was about 1983. and he was astonished. and said wow, she's an auntie. Where is she from And they're telling you and you are going. Boy, that's interesting. And you were kind of up and bouncing around and we know why that you're mixed race and you have proof. and they knew about it. And that's what they were up to And they got in trouble. So you can try and remember it. when she doesn't want you to

they dontwantthis out wedo.

need itnow

and yes they plan to hit her and hnd it over. adntons will see the relationship and john r thinks it good. and will help him get in. tons say it he is a nincompoop. nd he is and might go the other way all who support her will look like seem like us.and her base will grow

Thor Freya

stil dont want to get shot and i know he is a moron and might anyways. so be it i win then

camilla

Olympus

[jupiter-reimagined]

Stone just should not want to be pregnant. We're just going to shut him up, because we can make it so he didn't have bottom surgery after Laila's birth but I don't know who's going to impregnate him.

Kali: *slowly raising his hand*

Me: Put your hand down, Kali. You're with Butcher now in this AU, why are you still like this with Stone?

butcher: *raising his hand alongside kali*

me: keep this shit up and ill take away your cis privileges

butcher: *lowers hand*

me: thats not even in character for you and you know it. moron. AND WHAT HE SAID. youre supposed to be with kali !!!! dont make this an enemies to lovers or i swear to god !!

[liquidstar]

hi this is still going around and i kinda wanna clarify something for all the tags that are saying "omg character A would say this to character B because theyre a dummy <3"

first of all im all for blorbo tagging, especially with greek characters and headcanons! love that shit! go nuts! buuuut just in case anyone actually intends to use this in writing: SAYING "MORO MOU" IS NOT THE SAME AS ACTUALLY CALLING YOUR PARTNER A MORON!

when you use it in that context it really does just mean "babe/baby," no one who uses it would actively be thinking about how the old etymology would mean it technically means moron. that's more of just a funny fact. like, when we call our partners baby in english, we're not thinking about how it can also mean someone who's overly sensitive.

no one in modern greek really says moro to mean dumb anymore. its sort of clunky and weird to say. youre more likely to say "hazo" (stupid) or ilithio (idiot). which are also mean, like, dont call your partner that!

however, if you are writing a greek speaking character and want an alternative, i simply must introduce you to "re" (pronounced like "reh" not "ree") ill explain under the cut

see, the word "moro" becomes "more" (moreh) when directed at someone. this eventually became shorted to "re" which is a word that doesnt quite have an english equivalent.

its usually used as a prefix, you put it before someones name when referring to them (it only works in second person). for example, "re kosta, where are you going?" < this implies that the question is somehwat rhetorical, you think kosta is an idiot who doesnt know where he's fucking going. or "re stephano, cut that out!" < stephano is an annoying dumbass, "re" is being used to emphasize this fact.

so typically adding the "re" prefix to someones name is an insult, a shorthand way to make your statement more insulting, and just sort of refer to people disrespectfully in general. however in a friendly context, it can also show closeness- its casual and lighthearted. it doesnt imply stupidity so much as silliness, and can even be seen as positive. this can just sort of depend on tone. an example of the latter would be "re kristina, how have you been?" < this implies a casual atmosphere and general excitement to see kristina, "re" reinforces closeness with kristina.

the difference is so slight but it's definitely there in the way its used. the tone changes the meaning. saying "re niko!" in an annoyed tone implies insult, while saying it in a positive tone implies friendliness. of course you do have to be careful with this- even in a friendly way, this level of Casual isn't something youd have with your boss or teacher. (people youre meant to talk to with the Respectful way of speaking, something english doesnt really have either)

so yeah if you want a Real authentic greek way to casually call your loved ones idiots, in an affectionate way, this would be how to do it! you can even drop the name all together and just call someone "re"- the name is implied. even just saying it in its own can be used to be like "dude." or "dude???" and It may sometimes be lengthened to "vre" for emphasis

anyway if you made it this far you must actually care about this kind of stuff, so let me give you some other terms of endearment you could use that are actually Nice: "agapi mou" (my love), "matia mou" or "matakia mou" (literally "my eyes" but more along the lines of "light of my eyes." the -aki suffix is a diminutive), and "kardia mou" or "kardoula mou" (my heart. -oula is another diminutive). these can be used for either romantic partners or children!

also the insult a greek character should use the most often is malaka. maliciously and negatively. its like how irish people say cunt or brittish people say wanker (in fact thats the literal translation). that word means a lot to us. and yes of course, you can totally say "re malaka!!!" and this could mean anything from "you stupid son of a bitch i'm going to murder you" to "my awesome close good friend, its so good to see you!"

now you know!

funniest language thing in modern greek is that the word for baby/infant is��“moro” which literally means “idiot.” like someone looked at a baby 1000 years ago and was like “this guy doesnt know shit.”