#like to the point that I don’t even know what I’m confused about

[nyankochan]

Unwrap Me

Synopsis: you and Leona visit his family for the holidays. You prepared a special gift for him but can’t quite give it in front of his relatives

Content: Leona x fem!reader, afab!reader, reader implied to be Leona’s finance, oral (male and female receiving), dirty talk, penetration, rough sex, dacryphilia, overstimulation, multiple rounds, breeding kink

w/c: 3K

A/n: todays my birthday (*^_^*) and it’s also Christmas so as a gift, Leona Kingscholar. A happy holidays to everyone

Just one week.

Seven days. 168 hours. 10,080 minutes. 604,800 seconds.

That was how long Leona had to put up with his family for the holidays. That was it. One short week. If he kept repeating that to himself, then perhaps being around his extended family would be manageable.

As long as he knew there was a deadline, he could tolerate Cheka’s begging to bake Christmas cookies and his brother’s pestering about him coming home more often. He could put up with his sister-in-law’s insistence on the family taking updated photos in coordinated pajamas and Neji’s nagging about whatever he chose to complain about Leona not doing right at the moment.

He could handle it.

That’s what he told himself. But after the first forty-eight hours, Leona’s patience already began to wane.

Usually, Leona would hover close to you, using your proximity as an excuse to avoid interacting with his family. But of course, they, for some reason, all seemed to hog your attention from the moment you arrived at the Afterglow Savannah. Cheka wanted to decorate the tree with you. His sister-in-law took you away with his mother to talk wedding details and planing Leona didn’t quite care to participate in. The only time he got to see you was at dinner, because often times, you’d either come back to your room late or he’d find you already asleep.

The final straw was Christmas Eve. Leona had hoped for some time alone with you only for you to get swept away by Farena to help wrap gifts. It was well after 1am by the time you came to bed due to the sheer number of gifts he had bought Cheka.

At that point, damn Christmas and damn the gifts. All Leona wanted at this point was you and a moment of alone time before he went mad from having to watch another corny Christmas movie or pretend to like his sister-in-law’s awful cooking.

“Leona, don’t be such a grinch, smile a little. It’s Christmas!” Farena chided, making the younger Kingscholar roll his eyes. It was finally Christmas Day, and of course, Cheka woke everyone up with his excited yells at five in the morning. Needless to say, Leona was less than thrilled about having his sleep interrupted because “Santa came.”

“Be grateful I’m even here,” Leona muttered under his breath.

The family gathered in the living room, the adults sleepily making their ways in with coffee in hand and an excited five year old at the center of it all. Leona sat on the far end of the couch, immediately closing his eyes and trying to ignore Cheka’s questions about which gifts he could open first. Dressed in your robe, You plop down beside him and lean against his shoulder. You look exhausted, but hide it well with a smile.

For the next couple hours, everyone opens their own gifts. You got a few nice things from your wishlist, Leona gifting you the most expensive (despite your protests) being a new set of headphones you were eyeing. And he was quite pleased with one of your gifts to him, new spell drive equipment, among other things he received from his brother, parents, and Neji.

“Oh, Leona, I got one more gift for you,” you whisper. There’s a cheeky smile on your face as you reach into your robe’s pocket and pull out a small wrapped black box.

“Huh?” Leona’s ears twitched in slight annoyance. “We only agreed to do one gift this year.”

“I know but you’ll really like this one. But it’s for your eyes only. M’kay?” You kiss his cheek when you’re called by Farena’s wife to help make breakfast. After giving one last wink to Leona you skip off.

Confused yet curious as to what you had planned, he undoes the silk red ribbon holding the box together. Carefully, Leona lifts the lid. There’s nothing but a bunch of tissue paper inside. He pulls the paper out and at the bottom of the box is a small piece of the same red ribbon and a photo. Upon seeing what the picture is actually of, Leona immediately closes the box back before anyone else could accidentally see what was meant clearly for his eyes only.

“That little…ha…” Leona sighs, a grin spreading across his face.

He definitely wasn’t expecting that. But he surely was going to enjoy every bit of this gift. And if Cheka was allowed to be impatient, waking everyone up at the ass crack of dawn to open gifts, then Leona felt justified to do the same. He wanted to unwrap the rest of his gift now.

In the kitchen, you were helping the women make breakfast. You half paid attention to their conversations, mind drifting to Leona and what he thought of your little gift. You were quite excited and wished you could’ve seen his instant reaction to the surprise you had left in the box.

“Oi, Leona, if you’re not going to help in here then get out,” Farena’s wife scolded. You look up from what you were mixing to see your fiancé who has quite an unreadable expression on his face. But the intense look in his emerald eyes told you all you needed to know.

He opened your gift.

And you were in for it.

“I need to borrow Y/n,” Leona said, pushing past the lioness to you. “I’ll bring her right back. I forgot to have her open up one more gift from me.”

“What! Wait-“

“Just let them go,” Leona’s mom chuckles. She gives you a knowing wink, shooing you two away.

“But-“ Farena’s wife begins to protest.

Leona ignores her, grabs you by the arm, and drags you out the kitchen quickly. His pace is fast as he walks through the hall with a clear destination in mind. You can’t help but giggle, antsy excitement coursing through your veins. The two of you arrive at your shared room and he immediately locks the door.

“Leo~I was busy helping,” you feign innocence. “It was rude to interrupt.”

“I don’t care,” Leona said , taking a step closer to you. “Your little note was cute. Expecting me to wait until tonight for my gift?”

“Patience is a virtue you know.”

“And I don’t recall ever claiming to be a patient or virtuous man.” He takes a seat on the bed, spreading his legs slightly. Like a king on his throne. “Take it off.”

You undo the tie around your robe, letting the fabric slide down your shoulders slowly. Leona’s eyes seemed to dilate as he took in the attire you wore underneath: A sheer red baby doll. White lacy under garments and stockings with red bow detailing everywhere.

“You’re such a vixen wearing that underneath while around my family,” Leona lets out a shaky breath as he pulls you closer to him. “You did this on purpose, did ya?”

“Mhm maybe,” you tease, shivering as his thumb traces across your hips. “To be fair, not being able to see was equally annoying on my part. You don’t know how many boring meetings I had to have with your mother about flower arrangements and table decor. But she should get the others to leave us alone for a few hours.”

“Yeah? And how’d you convince her to do that?”

Your grin is wicked. “I might’ve promised her a new grand baby if I could have you to myself on Christmas.”

Leona’s eyes widened briefly before a smirk settled on his face. He could feel his cock stir within his pants. “Well, then, I guess we should deliver.” Leona pulls you into his lap, smashing his lips against yours in a frivolous and desperate kiss. He groans against your mouth as your hips rock against his, intense heat blossoming between the two of you. “You know,” Leona mumbles, “you’re almost too pretty to unwrap. I could admire this gift for hours.”

“I thought you were impatient,” you pant. Leona’s hands tightened around your waist. His teeth graze across your neck making you shiver.

“I am. But I still want to admire my beautiful fiancé.”

“B-but this gift was for you.” you whimper out as Leona nips at your neck, squeezing your breast through the bralette. “So let me admire you too.”

You slide out of Leona’s lap to kneel between his legs. His thighs tense as you trace your delicate hands up them to the drawstring of his pajama pants. The crotch bulges, the fabric held high by his erection. He groans when you grope him.

“Don’t tease me,” Leona warns. “Otherwise I’ll make you regret it.”

“So impatient,” you laugh, pulling his cock out of the confines of his boxers.

Leona lets out a shaky moan as your mouth envelops around the swollen head of his cock. You immediately take him deep, tears springing against your eyelashes as you begin to suck. “Fuck don’t stop,” Leona groans. His fingers tangle themselves in your hair, grabbing a fistful of it. His hips jerk up. Your tongue tracing the sensitive vein on his shaft. “Fuck. I’m gonna move you. Let me know if it’s too much.”

“Mhm.”

His other hand grips your head. He then roughly thrusts up while simultaneously forcing your head down his length. You whimper as you begin to gag. Tears trickle down your cheeks as Leona continues to fuck your mouth, his low grunts turning into quick pants. “Such a good fucking girl, taking my cock like this. Gonna swallow all of me okay?”

Leona’s eyes scrunch shut as he comes down your throat. He lets out a shaky moan, keeping a tight hold on your head so you can’t pull away. Your body trembles. Your eyes roll back as the lightheaded feeling makes you dizzy.

“Swallow,” Leona commands. And you do, opening your mouth to show you had. “Heh. Come here.”

His hands settle on your waist as he takes in your lingerie. His gaze a mix of adoration and lust that leaves you feeling bashful under the heat of his stare. “So fucking pretty.” Your cheeks warm and you stare at the floor, making him chuckle. “Why so shy now? You were quite bold earlier leaving that photo in that box with your cute little note. What did it say again?”

You climb back into his lap. Your breath hitches as his cock brushes against your clothed clit. Your panties soaked and needy, desperately wanting Leona in your most intimate region. “I don’t remember,” you tease. “Maybe remind me?”

Leona grins. His hands are soft against your skin. “I think it said something like…hurry up. And what else? Your pretty pussy is waiting to be unwrapped?”

��Hm that sounds about right. So then-“ You rock your hips against Leona’s. “What are you still waiting for?”

His mouth is on yours again, sucking all the remaining air out of your lungs. The two of you tumble into the bed, tearing at each other’s clothes until there’s nothing separating the two of you except your lacy panties. Leona has you pinned underneath him. He traces down your jaw and the side of your neck, biting down on the sensitive spot near your clavicle.

“Since your pretty pussy was wrapped up so nicely for me, it is only fair if I have a little taste, no?”

Leona settles in between your legs, pressing his nose against your cunt to inhale your intoxicating smell. He suppresses a groan. Your scent alone was addicting. It was like he was drunk on you, and he couldn’t think about anything but the way you’d feel around his cock. But first-

He pulls down your panties with his teeth. Dragging the thin fabric around the curve of your plush thighs before dropping them on the floor. Your folds are glistening with your arousal, pretty and puffy. And all his.

With a tight grip on your thighs, Leona takes a lick at your core, pressing his rough tongue against your pussy’s lips. The first wave of pleasure shoots through you which has you trembling. “You taste so good,” Leona groans. He eats you out greedily, tongue moving in and out of your folds.

“Fuck Leona!” Your back arches off the bed as Leona nips at your clit. He buries his face deeper in between your thighs, bringing you to the brink of release. Your body tries to writhe away from him, but his grip keeps you pinned down. You come with a low cry, Leona’s name on your tongue.

Leona drinks you down. His cock is now painfully stiff against his abdomen. All just from the addicting taste of your arousal. He stifles a groan, wrapping his hand around his shaft. He was so hard it fucking hurt.

“I’m going to fuck you in every way possible,” Leona says, licking his lips clean. The tip of his cock prods at your wet entrance. He grips your hips, trying to ease himself in. “I’m going to pump you so full of my cum that there’s no way you won’t leave this room without getting pregnant. After all, you were the one that went behind my back and promised my mother a grand kid.”

You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him close to whisper, “then you better get to it.”

Leona growls. He pushes into your cunt, groaning at how you squeeze around him. His head drops to your shoulder as his body trembles as a wave of pleasure courses through him. A low curse leaves his lips.

“L-Leo? Y-you okay?” You whimper.

“Just give me a minute.” He kisses you, softly this time. “I’m trying to control myself so that I don’t hurt you.”

“It’s okay. You can be a little rough.”

Leona’s ears twitch. He could feel his dick throb at your words. You groan as his size seems to swell.

“Heh, you asked for it.” Leona folds your legs to your chest making you gasp. “Don’t go begging me to stop later. Because I’m not until you’re carrying my cubs.”

“Please fuck me, Leona,” you mewl.

Rolling his hips, Leona pulled his cock from your hole and with a sharp snap, drove himself back into you. The sheer force of his scorching length shot the first wave of pleasure through the both of you. The two of you let out low moans.

Your body shuddered slightly anticipation. You clung to Leona and dug your nails in his shoulders trying to keep him close. That first penetration gave way to a succession of increasingly rougher thrusts that took your breath away.

“A-ah L-leona t-too much,” you babble. Leona growls, pushing your legs closer, burying his cock even deeper. “Leona!”

“I told you-“ Leona grunts, continuing his brutal pace. “You asked for it. You wanted it rough.” His cock kisses that particular sweet spot, making your insides tense. You cry out as your orgasm leaves you seeing stars. Your legs shake over his shoulder, and a tight pressure coils within your stomach.

“Fuck you’re squeezing me so much,” Leona groaned. “You like when I pound into you like this, don’t ya? Your pussy’s gonna fuckin’ kill me.” Your nails rake into his back, leaving bright red marks. You clamp down on his shoulder, biting so hard you broke the skin. Leona lets out a low hiss. “I’m gonna come-“

A loud moan left his lips. His hips stilled and his release hit. You shivered feeling yourself be filled while your own orgasm hit, this time with more intensity. Leona slowly pulled out and sat back on his heels. His seed leaks from your swollen sex on to the bed sheets. You let out a quiet whimper and push your fingers into your cunt, trying to stop it from spilling out. Once more, his cock stirs, the carnal desire within him burning.

“Are you okay?” Leona swallows, trying to maintain a sense of control. You sleepily nod. “Good.”

You squeak as you’re suddenly and roughly manhandled. Leona flips you on to your hands and knees, shoving your face into the pillows. “L-Leona-“

“Sorry, kitten-“ You gasp as he enters once more, his thick cock stretching your walls until you feel so full of him. Leona squeezes your hips, pushing his cock deeper. “but I want to enjoy my gift a little longer.”

~*~

You and Leona had been gone for hours.

Breakfast passes without your presence. And needless to say, neither Farena nor Neji are pleased. It is only due to Farena’s mother’s insistence that the two don’t venture off to look for the missing family members.

“Just leave them be,” the older lioness would dismiss.

“But mother, Leona-“ Farena huffed.

“It’s fine. They’re probably busy with wedding stuff. Some things they need to figure out on their own as a couple.”

You and Leona don’t emerge until right before dinner, trying to act as inconspicuous as possible. Like you hadn’t snuck off to fuck for a couple hours.

“Auntie Y/n!” Cheka excitedly runs over to you. You bend down, despite the ache in your hips and lower back to catch his hug. Cheka gives you an odd look as you pick him up. He looks at you then to Leona, back to you and then his uncle. It’s like he’s searching for something and when he doesn’t find it, he sulks in disappointment.

“Whatcha looking for Cheka?” Farena asks.

“Auntie said she and Leona would give me a cousin for Christmas, but I don’t see them.” The cub continues to pout.

Immediately, your face explodes red, and Leona rubs his temple in annoyance. The situation doesn’t improve as now the attention is on the two of you and what you were most likely doing in your absence. Leona and Farena’s mother only laughs in amusement. She spent the last several hours covering for you, so if you didn’t have a grandchild for her in the next nine months she’d be highly disappointed.

[russo-woso]

Giving it away || Jessie Fleming x Putellas!reader

Request | Masterlist | Prompt list

Warning Injury

Summary You and Jessie have hid your relationship for a while, but will it all get revealed when your sister and Jessie get in a heated tackle?

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

It had been a nightmare from hell.

Spain were playing Canada in a friendly.

To most people and players, it wasn’t a big deal. After all, it was just a friendly.

But for you, you were playing your girlfriend for the first time.

You and Jessie had been together for a few months, seven months officially.

You both met when you went to Chelsea for two seasons.

You wanted a break from Spain, always being in the shadows of your older sister, Alexia.

So, you decided to go to England. You quickly signed your contract with Chelsea, shifting your whole life to the WSL.

Your sister understood your reasons for leaving Barcelona, having you promise you’d come back.

You knew you would so you happily promised. You’d miss your homeland and your sister and go back.

But you met Jessie, and made the whole situation so much harder for you.

Over the course of the two years, you fell hard for each other, quickly becoming inseparable before realising your both liked each other.

When the two years were up, you made the decision to fly back to Barcelona and sign a year contract.

You’d made a name for yourself in the football community and you weren’t just alexia putellas’ sister, you were Y/N Putellas.

Jessie also made the decision to leave Chelsea, however, she didn’t follow you to Spain.

Jessie flew to America instead, signing for Portland thorns.

You spoke about it and agreed you could do long distance, the love between you so strong that you could make it work.

And maybe the idea of one of you leaving your respectable clubs to play in one country to be closer to each other.

You spoke to each other everyday on the phone. It was difficult, both of you could admit it, but it was working and that’s what mattered.

There was one downfall to it though, You had to do it secret.

Growing up, whenever you brought a girl round, Alexia scared them away, sometimes even with just a glare.

You didn’t want that to happen with Jessie, so you kept her a secret from Alexia.

You’ll tell her at some point, right?

Wrong

You didn’t and that’s what brings you to now, your girlfriend and your sister in the middle of a heated tackle.

It happened so suddenly.

Alexia had slid into Jessie, clipping her ankles sending Jessie hurling to the floor.

“Alexia!” You shouted, worry on your face as you focused on Jessie, her face scrunched up in pain. “Bebé, are you okay?”

It slipped out of you mouth, after all, it was natural for you to call her it.

“Bebé? What?” Alexia said, confusion written on her face. “You two? Are you… qué mierda.”

“Alexia, I was gonna tell you.” You muttered to her in Spanish, looking up to her as you crouched down, rubbing Jessie’s shoulder. “I was, I promise. It just hadn’t come up.”

“How long?”

“Seven months.” You replied, watching alexia nod with a sad expression.

“You didn’t tell me…”

“I couldn’t. I couldn’t because you always push the people I love away from me. You scare them, Ale.” You explained. “I love Jessie, I don’t want to lose her.”

Alexia looked at Jessie, medics surrounding her looking at her ankle, and back at you.

“I didn’t know.”

“Yeah, well it wasn’t you heartbroken when they all left.” You muttered

“I’m sorry. I didn’t know about the others.” Alexia apologised

“You didn’t know. But, Ale, I really love Jessie. Please give her a chance.”

“Does she make you happy?” Alexia asked, you nodding in response. “Then I guess I could give her a chance.

“Thank you, Ale.” You let out a sigh of relief, hugging alexia tightly.

“I just want to protect you. You’re my baby sister. I have to protect you.”

“You still can, but not when it comes to my love life.” You said, Alexia nodding in agreement.

You watched as alexia walked over to Jessie, extending her hand to help Jessie up.

“You love her?” Alexia questioned

“With my whole heart.” Jessie replied

“Good, because if you break her heart, I will—” Alexia began but you quickly cut her off.

“—Alexia! What did we just talk about?”

“Okay, okay. I’m sorry. Nice to meet you, Jessie. better?”

You nodded in approval, sending Alexis a grateful smile.

Alexia walked away, leaving you and Jessie.

“She approves!” Jessie exclaimed, punching the air in celebration.

“I haven’t officially approved yet.” Alexia added

“She’ll love you when she gets to know you, I promise.” You told Jessie

“Good because I never wanna lose you.”

“It’s a good job you won’t then.”

[multifandom-pleasures]

I would like to request a Sonic 3 Shadow x reader where after Shadow brakes out and go's to Tokyo he runs into a American tourist, who offers him her umbrella in the rain and he protects her when G.U.N shows up. Or reader offers to take him back to her hotel to wait out the rain . Or both please.

you trudged through the rain in the surprisingly still busy streets of Tokyo. you had decided to take a sightseeing trip and with the city being such a novel to so many people, you booked a flight to check it off your bucket list. today was merely your second day and it had not disappointed.

until today, that is. the rain had put a pause on your plans — which had been made in hopes of a mostly sunny day with light drizzle. the drizzle quickly turned into a downpour though. luckily you had still brought your umbrella despite the claims of sprinkles.

as you walked, staring straight ahead to make sure you wouldn’t accidentally bump into someone on the busy sidewalks, you took notice of a significantly shorter figure wandering aimlessly through the streets. cars mannered around it, honking and even splashing puddles over it, to which it would quickly shake it off and continue. the closer you got, the more the figure seemed to get clearer.

black and red fur, standing at about 3 to 4 feet, pointy ears and the only ‘clothing’ it wore was gloves and shoes. it’s little muzzle had a frown; brows scrunched up and red eyes flitting around in an almost panicked state. it clearly was confused by everything around it, and everyone was just passing him by — not even bothering to help.

it tugged at your heart. you couldn’t just leave the poor thing sopping wet and standing cluelessly in the streets. what if a car didn’t see it, and it got run over?

you slowly made your way over to it, and seemingly aware of your footsteps despite the noise surrounding it, it whipped around, glaring at you with its fists raised. It was intelligent enough to know danger it seemed.

“ I’m not gonna hurt you, “ you began, eyes flicking up to your umbrella and back down at it, “ but you’re going to get hurt if you keep walking around like that. and you’re all wet.. “ a flicker of confusion, but it seemed to be listening to you, ears twitching. you turned your umbrella towards it to block any more rain from seeping into it’s matted fur.

“ so you don’t get more wet. “ you explained softly, watching it crane it’s head back curiously to look at the umbrella, and how the rain bounced off and kept it dry. its arms lowered. it looked back up at you and parted it’s lips, and you wondered if it could speak —

tires screeched and you looked up, finding yourself now surrounded by military vehicles. the doors were quick to fly open and armored soldiers stepped out simultaneously, guns drawn and pointed to you and the creature. what had you gotten yourself into? you only had a moment to glance down at the little being — who met your eyes and took notice of the fear you had.

it was gone in the blink of an eye, and you turned around to see where it went. flashes of white and fur appeared and disappeared around you, and one by one the soldiers were taken down. you had to duck down with your umbrella forgotten beside you to cover from the gunfire, hands over your ears to muddle the loud bangs.

they stood no chance. within minutes all the soldiers were taken down, groaning in pain and some even retreating when they realized they couldn’t fight back. the creature appeared before you again, and you lowered your hands from your ears, eyes wide in shock and awe. he frowned, picking up your discarded umbrella and holding it over you. you took it with shaky hands.

“ you’re not hurt? “ it spoke, voice low and raspy, like it hadn’t spoken in some time. a boy, you decided — he sounded like a boy.

“ no. “ you murmured, slowly rising to your feet, “ are you? “

“ no. “ he responded, as if the mere thought of being touched was outlandish. laughable. you should have expected that with what you saw. you held the umbrella over you both and looked around at the fallen soldiers and overturned vehicles. it was still raining.

“ we should get out of the rain. “ you found yourself saying, and you were shocked with yourself. you were inviting this little creature, this boy alien to join you in finding shelter after witnessing the strength he had in his fists alone. they bothered him first, you found yourself reasoning, they surrounded him and made him feel he was in danger. he was protecting himself.

“ follow me. “ you looked down at the creature, and he stared up at you with a look of curiosity. but he didn’t look half as dangerous as he did a moment ago, “ I’m staying someplace nearby. It’s warm and dry. “ He nodded.

you began to lead him down the street as if the chaos behind you didn’t exist, and he followed beside you. the second being to treat him as if he were just another living thing and not a weapon — not that you would know that. you jumped when he spoke again.

“ shadow. “ he looked up at you, “ my name is shadow. “ a name to your savior. you gave a small smile down at him, and his face softened at the sight.

“ it’s nice to meet you shadow. “

this was certainly more interesting than sightseeing.

[silencesscreams]

hiii, idk if ur still active but I love ur writing and I was wondering if u could maybe do a james smut with a Christmas theme! tyyy💓

Merry Christmas, I miss you

james potter x f!reader

summary: you and James have been broken up since Halloween. Until he calls you on Christmas Day after finding out that you both were spending the evening alone. (muggle+modern day au)

warnings: use of y/n, reader is shorter than James, swearing, smut (MDNI!), afab reader, nipple sucking, oral/fingering (f receiving), praise!!!, penetration, multiple orgasms(2), slight dom!james, reader has hair long enough to be stroked, kind of make-up sex tbh, unprotected + use of the pill, creampie, not proofread at all 😭

a/n: thank you so so much for requesting! I immediately thought of this song, hope you like it <3

You hated spending Christmas alone.

When your family was getting plane tickets two months ago, you said you’d spend Christmas with James, who also cancelled his plans with his family, just for him to break up with you two weeks later.

There was no one you could spend the end of year holidays with, all of your friends were with their families or together.

James absolutely hated the silence in his apartment.

Sirius and Remus were spending the holiday together at cabin they found online and Peter had gone home to his family.

James hated having brought this upon himself.

Were you with somebody else out there? Were you meeting their family? Were they in your apartment?

It was killing him.

What he hated most of all was breaking up with you during a stupid fight which he didn’t even remember the reason why it happened. He just remembers being drunk and stupid.

So he called Sirius, because that was what he usually did when things went to shit, and also because Sirius was close to you and he would probably know what James had been asking himself for the past hour.

The phone rang about six times until he finally picked up.

“What do you want?”

“What do you think y/n is doing right now?” He heard Sirius groan.

“Why do you care about what she’s doing?” James didn’t answer. “She’s alone at her place, don’t call her.”

“You think I should call her?” He decided to ignore any advice that went against whatever he wanted.

“God, he’s so fucking confusing.” he heard Remus say.

“Moony, do you think I should call her?”

“James, you’re going to do whatever you want, aren’t you?”

“Always, but that’s not the point.”

“Do what your heart says and leave us alone pleeeeaseee!” Sirius said and hung up.

James dialed your number on his phone, he memorized it so there was no real meaning to why he deleted it a while ago.

When you read the name on your phone’s screen once it started vibrating you thought you’d faint.

You wished that he had butt dialed you, or that maybe he called the wrong person. You knew you were wrong.

“James?” You said as you picked up and paused the TV in front of you.

“y/n. Hi, merry Christmas.” He sat up straight on the couch. “What are you doing?”

You couldn’t believe him.

“What?” You asked, even though you heard him clearly the first time.

“What are you doing tonight?”

So he was booty calling you on Christmas, was that it?

“I’m currently watching every single sitcom Christmas episode I can think of. You?”

“I’ve been staring at the ceiling for the past three hours. Are you by yourself?”

“Yes.” You replied, almost whispering. You couldn’t understand him.

“Me too. Can I come pick you up? We could maybe watch every single sitcom Christmas episode together. I have some food here.” He was already getting up and putting on his shoes outside of the apartment.

“Sure.”

You sighed after hanging up, what could go wrong? You’d go, you’d eat his food, you wouldn’t hook up with him and you’d be home by midnight. It was fine. Everything was under control.

Until you got into his car.

Until you felt his smell, the three in one shampoo that had the sweetest smell a three in one shampoo could ever have.

“Hey, you look great.” He said, looking at you as you put on the seatbelt.

“Thanks, you too.”

“Did you change your hair?” James asked, starting to drive.

“Kind of, yes.” You looked out the window and then back at him. “You look the same.”

He let out a small laugh. “I do.”

It was usually a 10 minute drive from your apartment to his, in which you awkwardly played with the hem of your skirt and made small talk.

“I have some frozen pizza at home, we could make popcorn too if you like, I bought one of those air popping machine things a few weeks ago. Actually, Sirius got that.” He said as he parked the car on the empty street in front of the apartment complex.

“I’d like that.”

Maybe you believed everything was still in control until you entered his apartment, the floor was cold and you left your shoes at the door. He locked it behind you.

“You remember the place don’t you?” You nodded. “There’s a few blankets and a sweater on the couch and you can turn on the TV if you want to. I’ll take the pizza out of the freezer and get the popcorn machine ready.”

You decided on starting with The Office’s season two Christmas episode, then you watch the other eight. Or you’d move to New Girl, then maybe Brooklyn 99, possibly Seinfeld.

“Bad news!” You heard James say from the kitchen. “Theres no corn to pop” he said, coming out and looking at you sitting on the couch.

“It’s alright, how about we watch this one and then I can help you out with the pizza?” You moved to the right side of the couch, inviting him to sit on your left.

You did realize you had no control over anything once he sat and instinctively wrapped his left arm around your shoulder. That might’ve also been when he realized he had no control.

“What are we watching?” He asked as you covered your legs with the blanket on the couch, he pulled some of it to himself and shared with you, your knees touching under it.

“I thought we could start by the office, we obviously won’t watch all of them, so we can move to New Girl afterwards, then maybe we could do Brooklyn 99 or Seinfeld because I know you like those two.” You looked at him and he hummed.

“That’s a good plan.” You smiled at him and started the episode.

When Micheal started talking about the Yankee Swap, James took his left arm from off your shoulder and put it under the covers to scratch his calf. You missed the feeling of him over your shoulders, until he rested his hand on your upper knee.

You felt your entire body go hot until the end of the episode, when he took the blanket from off you both and supported himself on your thigh to get up from the couch, ‘accidentally’ giving it a light squeeze. You thought you were about to go insane and paused the TV, maybe it really was a Christmas booty call.

“I only have pepperoni, if you don’t mind.”

“I don’t.”

“Can you put it in the oven? I’ll get us something to drink.”

“Sure.” He brushed his hand against your waist as he moved behind you to open the fridge.

“There’s Diet Coke, wine and orange juice.” He looked back at you.

“Wine.” You answered, watching him take the bottle out along with a can of Coke.

“Aren’t you going to drink with me?” You grabbed two glasses from the cupboard and moved next to him.

“I have to drive you home.” He smiled at you.

“Maybe you shouldn’t.” You smiled back at him.

“I can’t let you walk or uber home.” He put your hair behind your ear.

“I could crash here, if there’s space for me.” You almost whispered, looking at him doe eyed.

“There’s always space for you in my bed.” He stated, his voice low as he poured wine into both of the glasses.

He watched you take a sip and realized you were holding back a laugh.

“What is it?” He smiled.

“This sucks.” You giggled softly. He took a sip from his glass and made a face.

“Oh my god,” he laughed “you have to blame Remus though, I don’t think I bought wine more than once in my entire life.” You smiled, remembering the bottle he brought to your house on your third date. He moved closer to you, resting his hands on your waist.

“I’m sorry about the wine.” He whispered and you felt his breathing against your face, you hummed and looked up at him, moving your hands to the back of his neck, gently stroking his hair.

“Fuck.” He whispered, looking into your eyes. He slowly leaned in, you could feel your heartbeat as he got closer to you. You felt his lips brush against yours and then his phone’s alarm went off, scaring the both of you.

“The damn pizza” he muttered, turning off the oven but not taking the food out. You leaned against the counter and looked at James, who put his hands on your waist again, asking you “Where were we?”, making you laugh for the first time in a while.

You threw your hands over his neck as he hugged you so tightly that you thought maybe you both could merge into one.

“I missed you.” You whispered into his ear.

“Yeah?” He teased you and you hummed. “I missed you so much, love.” He started kissing your neck, holding you tightly by your lower waist.

“I’m so sorry. For everything.” He pulled away, looking into your eyes. “Let me make it up to you, please.” You nodded.

He brought his lips to yours and kissed you quickly.

“Use your words.” He muttered against your mouth and your breath hitched.

“Yes, please.” You replied and he brought his lips back against yours, this time you parted your mouth and he let his tongue slip into it. His lips moved hungrily against yours, the hands on your waist quickly moving to cup your ass firmly. Before you knew it, you were moving against him, glad you’d chosen to wear a skirt as breathy moans slipped from your lips against his.

All of a sudden James pulled his lips away from yours,

“Go to my room, I’ll be there in a second.” He said, pointing to the corridor.

You left the door open and sat on his bed, waiting for him. Everything was the same, except for the photograph of the both of you he had framed and left on his desk, which was now nowhere to be seen. He came into the room with something behind his back.

“I got this for you in November, in case we saw each other today. I know it’s not much but it reminded me of you.” He handed you a black corduroy box, which had a gold necklace with a small heart pendant.

“Oh James, this is so pretty.” You looked at him smiling and closing the box and putting it on his nightstand “I’ll put it on later, thank you so much.”

“Let me make everything up to you, I truly am sorry.” He said, taking off his glasses and sitting in front of you on the bed. You put your hands behind his neck and pulled him in, kissing him gently as he moved closer to you, his knee between your legs.

You laid down and his mouth started to make its way to your neck, giving it soft kisses then gently biting and sucking, making sure to leave a few marks. Meanwhile, his hands trailed their way to your breasts, going under your already loose bra and playing with your nipples. He quickly helped you take off your shirt, also removing his own.

James quickly kissed your mouth and started to trail small kisses from it to your right nipple, which he brought to his mouth and sucked on, nipping at it with his front teeth every once in a while, meanwhile his left hand stimulated your other nipple.

Your hands moved to his hair, stroking it and tugging on it every once in a while, leading to groans that would send vibrations to your breasts.

Suddenly, he pressed his knee against your damp underwear as you desperately tried to get more friction from it, until he held down your hips.

“Let me help you, baby.” he hummed against your chest. “I’m going to take care of you, don’t worry.”

He helped you take off your skirt as you raised your hips, tossing it next to the bed and kissing your tummy, making his way down to your underwear, lowering it and kissing the skin right above your slit, almost where you needed him the most. He started to kiss your inner thighs, going up to your clothed core, pressing another kiss right on top of your covered clit, making you moan as he took off your panties, carefully placing them on top of your skirt on the floor.

“You’re so beautiful.” He whispered, his breath fanning against your pussy.

He started slowly at first, licking from your entrance to your clit, sucking it in the most careful way he could. Until you couldn’t hold back your moaning and you remembered how James Potter gave head like a starved man.

He held your thighs open as he sucked on your sensitive bud and fucked two fingers into you, making your back arch and causing you release the most incoherent sentences from your mouth, a mix of swearing, the word god and his name, but really, in that moment, the later two were probably the same to you.

Your hands tugged onto his hair as you reached your high, he looked up at you and kept stimulating your clit with his thumb, inserting a third finger into your hole.

“Cum for me, honey.” He said, sensing you were close to your high and going back to sucking your bud.

Your eyes rolled back in pleasure as you moaned out his name, squeezing his head in between your thighs as he carried you through your orgasm.

Once you were finished, James moved up to kiss you. His mouth moving hungrily against yours.

“I want you.” you said as you pulled away, looking into his eyes.

“You already have me, sweetheart.” He smiled, getting up to get something to clean you up with. You pulled him back by the wrist.

“No, I want you in me. Please. ‘Need more.” You said lowly, giving him a quick peck.

“You sure?” You knew he wanted it too, he just wanted to make you feel good and forget about himself for the rest of the night.

“Yes, please James.” You replied, pulling him by the wrist again once he went to reach for a condom in the nightstand drawer. “I want to feel you. I’m on the pill, please.”

He smiled, taking off his sweatpants and going on top of you, his knees pressed against the mattress next to your thighs as he kissed you, tilting your head to deepen it.

He started kissing your neck, giving soft pecks on the marks he had left behind earlier, while taking his length out of his underwear and lining himself up against your entrance, teasing you with his tip as you practically begged him to get inside of you.

“Patience, baby.” He muttered, slowly starting to thrust into your needy hole whilst pulling your right leg up and bending it, almost making your leg shin touch your thigh as he tried to go as deep as possible.

You couldn’t help but moan out his name once he started thrusting and kept hitting the most perfect spot he could whilst stimulating your bean with his thumb. You clenched around his cock as he started to thrust rapidly into you.

“That’s it baby, you’re doing so good.” He’d whisper in between grunts in your ear while you scratched his back in pleasure. “So- mhm so good for me, baby.” He said, his mouth clashing against yours, his tongue entering your mouth as you opened it. You clenched your pussy around him and you both can’t help but moan into each other’s mouths, his thrusts getting faster and his grunts and moans only louder, showing you how close he also is.

You felt your second orgasm building up as he pinched your clit and you squealed onto his tongue, your teeth clashing, causing him to pull away and smile against your mouth, his teeth against your lips.

“Are you close, princess?” He whispered and you replied with a nod, your nose against his cheek. He thrusted quickly and made circular motions on your clit at the same pace. “Hm, cum for me baby, cum on my cock.” He commanded as you reached your second high, pulling him in by the back of his neck to kiss you again. The kiss was sloppy as he shot his load into you and you clenched around him, his thrusts faltering.

He collapsed right next to you, grabbing his glasses on the bedside table to look at you properly.

“You’re so beautiful.” He praised you, smiling as he stroked your hair. “Thank you for picking up. Thank you for being here. For everything.” He whispered.

“Thank you for calling.” You smiled.

“The pizza’s probably cold.” He muttered, looking at his bedroom door.

“I don’t care.” You gave him a peck. “Merry Christmas, James.”

“Merry Christmas, love.”

[godmadeaterribleerror]

Chapter 6 - Everything I Do

Tags: Dean Winchester/Female Reader, Sam Winchester/Reader (platonic), light fluff, mutual pining, light angst, love confession, smut (handjob, fingering, p in v sex), Dean's got the Mark of Cain, uh oh.

Summary/Warnings: The Mark reaches a breaking point. Usual Warnings, little angst, lotta smut.

Author's Note: I am of the firm belief Rowena would’ve said cunt religiously if the CW wasn’t full of a bunch of pussies.

Chapter title from Video Games by Lana Del Ray

Word Count: 8.7k

Read on A03!

Chapter 5

Dean can breathe. Not easily, but he can. He can feel the weight of something airy and thin wrapped around him, stuck to his skin and far too heavy. There’s a hand on his brow, and it’s not the right one. Dean’s not sure what the right one would even be, but he knows it’s not this one. This one feels a little wrinkled, and the nails are too long, and it doesn’t satiate the betterlust. It’s just there, pressed to his skin like it’s looking for something and not all too pleased with what it finds.

The longer it’s there, the more the betterlust pounds and stabs and scrapes at him. Rots his guts and carves open his skull and rips through his chest. It’s searching for something that’s not there, and Dean’s head is too clouded with pain and ache and sickness to figure out where he should even be looking. Not in the hand. Not in the thing around him like a shroud–hot and clinging to him like a plague—but maybe somewhere close. Because wherever Dean is—he doesn’t know, and he doesn’t have enough of a brain to guess right now—it’s unfamiliar, but feels right. He’s lying on something soft, and it smells good, and when his fingers flex, they’re tracing over an impression left on the area next to him. An indent left on the space by something that could curve and press into Dean exactly like he wants. Craves. Needs. 

The betterlust starts to flare and bellow, almost drowning out the low voices around him, and Dean knows he might die if he doesn’t find what fits into that impression and take it.

“How long has he been like this?”

“I’m not sure, a few hours?”

“Well can you try to be sure, Samuel?”

“I got here the same time you did, how am I supposed to be sure-“

“Ask our resident Dean Expert, the poor girl has been stuck with him all week-“

“No, I’m not going to make her do more. And, uh,” there’s a long sigh, and Dean still isn’t really sure what’s going on, or who these people are, or why they’re talking about him. “I don’t think it’s safe for her right now. To be around him. He said he didn’t want her-“

“He obviously lied, you idiotic boy-“

“He didn’t want her to know, Rowena. And it’s not my place to tell her-“

“She’s a big girl, she’ll survive a little bit of emotions.”

“He’d, he’d fucking kill me-“

“And he will kill himself if he does not accept what he needs! It’s quite honestly a miracle he was a stubborn enough arse to resist the Mark’s demands this long.”

Dean’s really fucking confused. There are two voices, one that sounds a little like his and one that very much doesn’t, and they’re both talking about him like he’s important. He doesn’t feel important. He mostly just feels tired, and bad, and sick. Sweaty and hungry and desperate for something he can’t name, but they say he needs to name or he’ll die, and he doesn’t even really know what names are right now-

“If I tell her, this becomes her responsibility-“

“Well, Dearie, I wasn’t aware you were stupid and blind-“

“Hey-“

“You cannot look me in the eyes and say that she would not welcome the responsibility, boy. She is so pathetically obsessed with him it makes me feel ill.”

Dean felt his mouth try to frown—he can’t figure out how to move, so it more of a twisted grimace—as he racked his mush of a brain to figure out who they could possibly be referring to. He couldn’t remember names, but he could remember presences. Remember that the voice like his was good, and he was supposed to protect it. The voice that wasn’t like his was bad, and kind of a bitch, but helpful when they ran out of options. There wasn’t a third voice, but there was a smell that he really liked. Loved. Craved. Needed-

That was the imprint. And it wasn’t here right now, but the betterlust and already spiraling around it and constricting his lungs as he tried to find it. He needed it, and it didn’t need him, and he was going to die-

“I know,” the familiar voice sighed. “Believe me, I know, but I can’t ask that of her-“

“She’ll shred your sorry arse apart if you don’t-“

“And Dean will put a bullet through my brain if I do!”

“He will die before he gets the chance. Have I not made it clear that, unless Dean receives the help our lovely, pretty, lovesick-“

Then the voice that wasn’t like Dean’s said a name, and the betterlust exploded inside him. He knew that name. He’d die and kill and cut himself to pieces for that name. He wanted it. He couldn’t have it. He needed it, more than he needs air or water or food or music. The betterlust demanded it, and was shredding apart his insides because he refused to take it, but was also lending him the strength to find it. To find Her. Dean needed to fucking find Her, or nothing would ever be good again-

His eyes fly open, and for a long movement everything is only a blinding blur of color. There’s noise around him—both voices shouting words that sound like they’re for him but he can’t understand—and Dean’s brain kicks into a vigilant, borderline feral function as he hauls himself up, something pushes him back down, and the betterlust grew feral.

“Rowena, grab the other arm-“

“I am not meant for brute labor, Samuel-“

“Are you fucking kidding me-“

Dean roars Her name clawing and grabbing at the air to try and go, try to get to Her, because he was going to fucking die, and the betterlust told him She could fix this, make this better, make Dean better-

“Oh for- Fine.” 

The voice not like Dean’s says something he can’t understand, his whole body tightens. Like a weight has been dropped on his chest, and ropes have been wrapped around his limbs, forcing him to collapse back onto the bed with a noise that might have been a whine.

“Dean.” Rowena appears in his vision, her face drawn in annoyance. “Blink twice if you understand me.”

Dean scowls, but blinked twice.

“Good. Are you going to try and kill us again?”

Dean glowers at Rowena, keeping his eyes wide open in a gesture of no, and she sighs.

“Good boy. I’ll let you up, but if you ever try and grab my hair again, I’ll make you regret having hands, aye?”

The tension vanishes from Dean’s body, and he sits up slowly, pinch the bridge of his nose to try and curb the pounding ache behind his eyes, taking deep, mechanical breathes to get some fucking control over his body. Over the betterlust. Over himself.

“Dean, are you feeling okay?“

Sam looks worried. He’s frowning and scanning over Dean with concern, like there will be wound on his skin they can patch up to fix this. 

But only one thing can fix this. And Dean still isn’t strong enough to not know where She is, not when all he can remember is dragging himself to Her room, and hearing her voice, and seeing her pretty face before it all went dark. 

Dean mutters Her name, his voice low and gruff, and Sam and Rowena freeze. “Where is she.”

“She’s eating.” Sam mutters, bracing his hands on his hips. “I told her to get some rest. You freaked her out, dude, she-“ Sam shakes his head, giving Dean a look he doesn’t understand, and doesn’t have the energy to try and decipher. “She was really shaken, when we got back. She needs-“

“She needs you.” Rowena interrupts Sam, and he shoots her a venomous glare. “You’re too much of a meat-headed dolt to see it, but that darling girl looked as if she’d been devastated over you.” 

“Rowena.” Sam hisses. “We agreed-“

“You agreed. I made no promises-“

Dean raises his hands—they both need to shut up, or his skin will fly off his body—and their argument stutters off.

“How bad is it.” He looks to Rowena, the moment alone an act of labor. “And don’t try to lie or sugarcoat it. How long I got.”

Rowena sighs. “If you insist on keeping your head up your own arse, a day. Maybe two.”

“But we’re going to try to reverse it.” Sam jumps in, his voice desperate. “And Rowena gave you something to keep you going-“

“But, as I told your brother,” Rowena’s words are harsh, and Dean appreciates it. This really isn’t the fucking time for dancing around anything. “It is a very temporary solution, and the reversal will take time you no longer have. There is an obvious fix to your little problem-“

Dean lets out a dry chuckled. “My problem? Last I checked, Rowena, you were the one who fucked this up-“

“I did not fuck anything up, you petulant man child-“

“Rowena-“

“No!” Rowena cuts off Sam with sharp words, holding Dean’s glare. “I did my job, Dean Winchester, but you are too much of an arrogant, brooding little cunt to do yours.”

Dean narrows his eyes. “Watch it, bitch-“

“I did not have to help you,” Rowena hisses. “But that poor, desperate, lovesick woman begged me to. You know exactly what you need, and you are too cruel and stupid to do it.”

Dean’s hands curl into fists on the sheets. “I said fucking watch it-“

“She’s right.” Sam mutters, and Dean’s gaze whips to him, his mouth falling open at Sam’s pitying, exhausted expression.

“I’m sorry, I must be going insane, because there’s no fucking way you just sided with Rowena-“

“I didn’t side with her.” Sam snaps, running a hand over his face as he shakes his head. “I’m just trying to get you to think for five seconds. I’m trying not to lose my brother because he can’t see what’s right in front of him-“

Dean scoffs. “There’s nothing in front of me, Sam. Rowena botched the spell, and now I can’t do anything but-“ He cuts himself off with a groan, a stab of pain twisting over his ribs, and Sam throws his hands in the air.

“For crying out loud, Dean, you’re dying because of this self-righteous, sacrificial bullshit you always pull! Rowena didn’t botch the spell, you’re just refusing to give the Mark what it wants, and until you do-“

“It doesn’t matter what I want!” Dean roars, slamming a hand down on the mattress. “Fuck, Sam, I’m not going to force myself onto her just because-“

“Because you think she’ll say no?” Sam rolls his eyes. “Dude, you can’t be stupid enough to really believe that-“

Dean scowls. They don’t fucking get it. Sam and Rowena don’t know Her like Dean does. They don’t understand that She would say yes, but she wouldn’t really want it, and Dean would stain and mark Her in a way that they’d never come back from. She’d never smile at him the same, and he’d have to die alone in the dirt when she finally got the memo that he wasn’t worth helping. When She left him, her soul more tainted than when she’d found him. When his poison sunk into Her skin, and she would still be so pretty and amazing, but ruined and marred from Dean’s touch. From how weak and pathetic and toxic he was. 

He couldn’t do that. He’d rather fucking die.

“Just drop it, Sammy.” Dean mutters, his gaze falling to that imprint of Her on the bed. Her bed. Dean was finally in Her bed, and he didn’t even get to enjoy it. “It’s not happening. And you’re not going to convince me, so either fix this, or let me die without goddamn yelling at me.”

There’s a moment of wired silence, Rowena silent in the corner of the room as Sam and Dean glare at each other, and Sam shakes his head like he can’t believe Dean’s nerve. Like Dean isn’t saving the only good thing they both have. Protecting the only person that’s stayed with them, that they both love, even if Dean’s love is made of undying, animalistic, grime and dirt covered devotion, and Sam’s is purer, softer affection that could never cut and scar Her like Dean’s. 

“She was crying.” Sam finally says, his tone colder than Dean’s heard it in a long time. “When we got back, she was sobbing, Dean. Have you ever seen her cry? Ever?”

He hasn’t. Dean has seen Her grit her teeth and bite back sounds of agony from injuries, seen Her scream and flail when they’ve lost people, and seen Her so angry it scared him a little, but he’s never seen Her cry. She didn’t cry. Her eyes got glossy, and her voice grew tight and choked, but she didn’t cry. Sam has to be lying, and he doesn’t look or sound like he is, but he has to be. She doesn’t cry, so why the hell would that be the truth? But why would Sam lie, and why has She stayed this long, and fuck, everything hurts and Dean’s too damn tired to figure out what the hell Sam is trying to tell him but the betterlust is scratching at his heart to know-

“Sam,” Dean swallows, watching his brother carefully. “I-“

There’s a knock at the door, and everything in Dean flies to the sound. It’s Her. Before Sam’s hand is even on the doorknob, Dean somehow knows it’s Her. Here. Maybe for him, maybe not, but the betterlust doesn’t seem to care because it’s Her-

She looks horrible. Still so fucking pretty, but horrible. There’s a slump to Her posture as she stands in the door—hair tangled and shirt wrinkled—and Her gorgeous face is slightly puffed. Her lips pouting. Her eyes lined with red. 

Like She’s been crying. 

Sam says Her name in question, and when She speaks her voice is hoarse.

“Look, I know you to told me to rest, but-“ Her mouth falls open as her eyes land on Dean, and Her sharp inhale feels like it shoots adrenaline right into his blood. 

He tries to offer Her a winning, I’d be happy to see me too smile, but it doesn’t feel right on his face. It feels too vulnerable, where it’s always been like a shield. It feels like it’s a lie, or trick, or act of cruelty when Dean’s rarely met a woman who doesn’t flush and giggle under that attention. It’s supposed to make him feel good from their happy, hopeful eyes. It’s supposed to make them feel good from Dean’s well-crafted, carefully wielded charm.

But right now he still just feels like shit. Bottom of the gutter, horrible, flea-ridden and matted shit. A fucking piece of shit that might have made Her cry, and isn’t even smart enough to know why.

He tries again, making the smile wider, adding his most casual drawl. “Hey, Sweetheart-“

She makes a strangled sound—loud and pained, making the betterlust start to snap at Dean’s brittle spine—and all but runs to the bed, almost falling to Dean’s side as Her hands begin to grab at his face and run over his skin. Angling him for Her to examine with frantic eyes and words, igniting little paths of insatiable fire wherever She touches.

“Are you okay?!” She turns his head to the side, her fingers tracing his jaw and cheek like boils or scars might have just appeared. “Your fever is gone,” the back of Her hand presses to his brow, flipping to touch it with Her palm. “But shit, you’re covered in sweat-“ Her glare whips around to Sam, Her grip still tight on Dean’s face. He doesn’t really mind. The betterlust is still trying to climb out of his throat, but he can fight it—for Her—and this can be enough. It’s all he’ll get before he’s gone anyway. Her touch, and loud almost furious shout at Sam. “Why didn’t you change the sheets like I told you to-“

“He was dead weight,” Sam says Her name, his voice a hell of a lot kinder than when he’d been talking to Dean. “And you also told us to make sure he got some rest. Rowena said the fever broke, and he’s lucid again-“

“But this is gross Sam, and you could’ve moved him if you tried-“

“Moved him where? He started freaking whimpering when we took away your comforter-“ 

Dean scowls. “Can you guys stop talkin’ about me like I’m not right fucking here-“

Her gaze turns back to Dean, the odd, aggressively mind-numbing panic and care returning to her eyes as she begins to examine him once more. 

“You seem better, but you’re redder than you should be, and, shit, was that scar always there-“

Her finger’s trial over Dean’s chin, dangerously close to his mouth, and he has to bite down a groan as he says Her name. “That’s been there at least a decade-“

“What about this one-“

“Three years, you were there when I got it-“

“Fuck, you’re right.” She shakes her head, Her eyes suddenly boaring into Dean’s and settling warmth in his gut. “Well, are you feeling okay? Does anything hurt, or feel sick, or feel numb-“

“Sweetheart.” He catches Her hand, and she falls silent with wide eyes. “I’m-“

“And,” She moves his gaze onto Her’s, and fuck She’s always so pretty. Even when She’s pissed at him. Especially when She’s pissed at him. “Don’t you dare fucking lie to me, Winchester, I’ll stab you-“

He chuckles, and it’s dry and low, but maybe the realest sound he’s made since he woke up. “I don’t doubt that, Sweetheart.” He drawls, and she lets his guide Her hands away from his face. “But I promise, I’m feelin’ better.”

She nods slowly, and Dean pretends he can’t see Sam’s eye roll in the background.

“Oh. Okay.” She turns at Sam and Rowena, her voice slightly unsteady and weak. “Have you, um, have you both been in here? The whole time I was eating?”

Sam nods. “Yeah.”

“Oh.” She swallows, and Dean notices Her body go slightly rigid. Sam must notice too, because he tilts his head and frowns at her.

“Is that okay?”

“Yeah, sorry, it’s just…” She trails off, staring at her nails as her voice drop to a mumble. “There’s a lot of people in here. Makes me nervous.”

“Shit, sorry.” Sam says Her name, his voice apologetic. “Didn’t know that. We can go, if you want.”

There’s a long moment where She’s just staring at Sam, Her mouth slightly open, and her body curled in on itself like she’d been punched. Sam repeats Her name, his voice cautious, and when She snaps out of it, her voice is still soft and anxious. 

“That would be good.” She whispers. “Thank you.”

Sam nods. “No problem. Me and Rowena,” he shoots the witch a glare, and she rolls her eyes. “Are gonna go try to fix this. Text me if you need anything, either of you.”

She hums an acknowledgment, Her attention never leaving Dean as Sam and Rowena close the door, and Dean’s whole existence begins to curve into only the feeling of Her as her fingers trace over the back of his hand. 

After a long moment of silence—only the sound of Dean’s heart in his ears and the shifting of blankets under their bodies—she swallows, her voice barely a breath. “They can’t fix it, can they.”

He blinks at Her. “They’re gonna get it-“

“Don’t lie to me, Dean.” She gives him a soft smile that makes her look like she’s already grieving, and something in him lights up and withers away in the same second. “Please.”

He swallows. He is really tired of lying to Her. And he can say something closer to the truth and still hold his ground. He’s not quite that weak. Not yet.

“It’ll be close.” He grunts. “But I’ve survived worse. I just gotta pull through-“

“You don’t, though.” She whispers. “Rowena said you just have to-“

“Rowena can eat me.” Dean mutters, glaring at the door. “I’m not doin’ whatever the hell the Mark tells me to, that was the fucking point of this.”

“The point was to help you, Dean.” She sounds so freaking sad, and it’s pulling Dean apart. His will and mind all being reduced to Her. Too good and pretty to be sad. And it’s just Dean. She shouldn’t be this sad over only Dean.

“Sweetheart-“

“I don’t,” She swallows, speaking over Dean with quiet, soft words. “I don’t know why you’re being such an ass, Dean. Why can’t you just do what the betterlust wants? Isn’t it what you want-“

“It is.” Dean has to push the words through his teeth, because She so close and it’s not close enough and everything fucking hurts. “But I can’t have it, so we’re dead in the water. But Sammy and Rowena-“

“Dean.”

He can’t look Her in the eyes. Her voice is so gentle and nervous, and he’s not strong enough to look Her in the eyes and see all that worry and pity in them. He can barely even grunt an acknowledgment for her to continue.

“What do you want?”

“I’m not gonna-“

“Is it me?” She whispers, and Dean’s eyes shoot to Her’s. He can’t breathe. He can’t do anything but stare at Her and try not to die as he realizes this is it. This is how he loses Her. Forever. This is the last time he gets to look at Her and bask in her beauty and kindness, the last time he gets to drown in the smell of cherries and feel a little more alive under Her touch.

But She doesn’t look afraid, or disgusted. She just looks urgent. Desperate. As confused and hopelessly hopeful as Dean feels.

And he can’t speak, or think, or do anything but stare at Her as she speaks again.

“Dean, do you,” She takes a shaking breath, and Dean needs to touch Her. “Do you love me?”

——————

He’s not saying anything. Dean’s looking at you like you’ve shot him right through his heart, ripped it out, and taken a bite. Gaping like he’s trying to ask you for it back but can’t find the breath to, blinking like he’s trying to test if you’re really there. He reaches a hand up to run over his own face, reaches out to touch you—trace broad, calloused fingers over your cheekbones and jaw, over your chin like he’s wiping something you can’t see away—and jerks back suddenly, like you’d hurt him. Burned him. Branded him.

He’s branded you. You’re never going to forget his voice in your head, sounding like he’s overdosed on something awful, and doesn’t think he’ll come back down. Like he’s trying to cleanse himself of something by whispering words that will either haunt you past the grave or feed you for the rest of your life. Your heart will never forget the way it stopped for only a second before kicking into a pace that was all too fast when Dean’s eyes closed, and your hands will always remember the cold fever of his skin.

“Dean.” You have to make your voice strong. Steady, like you’re demanding something from him and not praying to him. “Please-“

“Why-“ His voice is hoarse, almost strangled, and it makes your every muscle feel a little weaker. “Why would you ask that.”

“I’m, I can’t tell you, just please answer me-“

“Did Sam tell you-“

“Sam?” You frown, shaking your head slightly. “No, I just, this has nothing to do with Sam-“

“Then why the hell are you-“

“What would Sam have told me?”

Dean falls silent, opening and closing his mouth as he goes red, his eyes looking almost feral. He looks like a cornered animal, something starved and needy, unsure if it should bite the hand reaching for it or grab it and never let go. 

You want to hold him and never let go. You want him to grab your hand, and hold it, and never think to drop it again. You want to hear him say those words again, and have his voice be certain. You want to touch him, no matter if he’s like this or breaking or furious or—in those rare, priceless moments—happy. And you need to know. Dean’s never owed you anything, and he never will, but if there’s only one thing that he can offer you in universe, it would be really nice if it was this. If Dean ever gives you anything, please, dear God, let it be this. 

“Dean,” you whisper, moving your hand to his knee and holding his almost fearful, rabid gaze. “Please answer me. Tell me what Sam-“

“He,” Dean swallows, voice gruff. “He wasn’t supposed to say anything. He fucking swore he’d never-“

“He didn’t.” You repeat, unsure if he’s even understanding the words out of your mouth. “All I’ve talked to Sam about is the spell. But why-“

“Rowena.” He mutters, and it sounds like he’s mostly talking to himself. “Rowena must’ve open her bitch mouth-“

“I haven’t really talked to Rowena at all-“

“Must’ve been some fucking spell-“

“Dean!” You scream, your nails digging into his leg like you can hold him with you forever. “It was you! You told me you loved me! You had a fever and you told me you loved me, you said my name, and I just,” Your voice cracks, desperation starting to break through your blood, out of your mouth in spit. “I need to know, please, you need to tell me if you meant it-“

“Sweetheart-“

“Please.” You refuse to look him in the eyes. The moment you look in Dean’s deep, pretty eyes you’ll know what he’s thinking, and you’ll lose him forever. Everything in you is screaming to know, but you’re still not able to just look into Dean’s eyes. “Dean, please tell me.”

“Why.”

For a second you’re not sure if you heard him right. The question startles you enough to make you look up, and the moment you see him something snaps inside of you. He looks wounded. Nervous. Almost as afraid of you—of your words, and what they might be capable of doing to him if you use them wrong—as you are of him.

“Why would you need to know.” He rasps, staring at his own hands. Flexing in his lap, seemingly against his will. “You’re not- It’s not somethin’ you’re-“ He looks up to you, his eyes almost pleading. “Why would you give a shit about-“

“About you?”

Dean’s throat bobs, his nod short, and you summon more bravery than you’ve ever been capable of before. Enough to reach out, over the space between your bodies that so small—but still feels like miles—and place your hand on his cheek. Keeping his gaze on yours.

“I always care about you. I-” You take a shaking breath, the last words falling off your tongue. “I love you.”

Dean’s hand shoots up to cover yours. To hold you against him, with a grip that tells you he might be trying to sear his skin into yours. 

“You-“ His voice is so soft. His hand over yours is like iron, but everything else about him seems to be dreamlike. Hazy and uncertain, both of you watching each other like you’re sure the other will vanish if you look away. “You love me?”

“Yeah,” you try to smile at him, and it’s not charismatic. It’s pleading and tragic and so fucking delicate. “I do. I mean, I have. For a while.”

“How-“

“Four years.“

He blinks at you. “No, I, I meant-“ He swallows, shaking his head. “I meant how. How did that happen.”

It’s your turn to frown at him. “How did that happen?”

“You shouldn’t love me.” He mutters, his hand over yours flexing. Like he’s trying to pull it away but doesn’t know how. “It’ll get you hurt.”

You raise your brows slightly, running your thumb over his cheek. “Are you going to hurt me?”

Dean’s eyes narrow. “That’s not what I-“

“Are you?”

“Of course not, I’d never-“

“Why?”

“It doesn’t matter why-“

“It does.” You whisper, folding your legs under you to rise on your knees, dropping your brow to his. Holding his gaze the whole time. “It matters to me, Dean.“

He makes a choked sound, but doesn’t move away. “Why?”

“Because I love you.” You whisper. “And it would be really cool if you loved me.”

Dean’s only staring at you, his eyes flicking between your own, slightly blurred gaze that can still see him so well, and your lips. 

“And it happened,” you push on, your voice growing a little weak when he still doesn’t respond. “Because it’s really easy to love you, Dean Winchester. You’re a good man.” You offer him a smile, and his own mouth falls open just a little. “And even if you don’t love me, I wouldn’t have you any other-“

Something in Dean’s eyes flickers, and he moves before you’re sure what’s happening. Yanking you into his lap with his hand—fingers now tangled in yours—catching you with an arm around your waist, and kissing you. 

Kissing you. Dean’s kissing you. 

Your body sparks into action—even as your brain becomes fogged with a hazy, Dean-shaped lust—and you fist a hand into his shirt, pulling him as close as the world will allow. He’s holding you so carefully, leaning down in a slight dip, and there could be a storm raging around you instead of the soft, romantic rain this feels like it belongs to, but you wouldn’t know. Because this is a kiss people wage wars over. 

It’s louder than music in your ears and electric in your blood, but sparks isn’t a strong enough word. It’s like lightning. Shooting through your spine and lighting up every nerve in your body to Dean. Soft lips molding perfectly into yours, warm and calloused hands skillfully mapping over your skin, a groan down your throat that you can feel settle in your lower gut and start a wildfire.  You’ve been hungry and you’ve never dared to eat, but Dean is here now and you’ll either be starved for the rest of your life or never want for anything again.

When Dean tries to pull away, you just follow him. Chase after his lips with yours, trying to get just a little more before this all comes tumbling down. Before the thought can even dare to cross Dean’s mind—that he’s not good for you, and he should go—because this is all you’ve ever wanted and you’ll be damned if you don’t cling to it for as long as he’ll allow. You’ll fall all the way down, until your body is only supported by Dean below you, and you’ll forsake oxygen until your body demands it. Maybe a little while after, too. 

And Dean doesn’t seem to care to let you go. Every time he tries to pull back it’s a jerked movement, and every time you collide again he grows more and more feral. His groans turn into deep, animalistic growls, and his touch on your skin becomes rough. Not painful, never painful, but urgent. Uncontrolled. Pulling at your skin like he’s trying to meld it into his, kissing you with bruising force, bucking up into you with his hard cock brushing your inner thighs. 

You grind down onto him once—when he hits closer to where you’re beginning to ache for him, and your own need grows stronger than you’re desire to let Dean control this—and he bites you. Dean catches your lip between his teeth, sucks in into his mouth, and grins like he’s won a prize when you whine a plea of his name.

“Holy shit,” he mutters your name, pressing his brow to yours as you both catch your breath, grabbing your waist to stop the next roll of your hips. “I’m not- I can’t do this to you-“

“You’re not doing anything to me,” you whisper. “I love you. I want this.”

Dean catches your hand, running his thumb over your knuckles and staring at the movement, his voice so low you almost don’t hear it. “Say you’re lying.”

You blink at him, and shake your head. “No.”

His eyes flash, shooting back to yours as he grunts your name. “You need to say you’re lyin’ right now, or I’ll-“

“You’ll what?” You lower your face back down, until you’re sharing Dean’s every breath. “Fuck me? Actually say you want me?”

His throat bobs, voice rough with lust. “You, I can’t fucking control it, sweetheart, if you’re fuckin’ with me you need to take it back now-“

“Dean.” You grab his face between your hand, forcing his darkened gaze back to yours. “Answer my fucking question.”

He shakes his head weakly. “You don’t-“

“I love you.” You hiss. You need to make sure he feels it, in the slightly spit on his face, that still tastes a little like him because it’s pushed through lips that are swollen from Dean, and Dean alone. You glide a hand down his chest, the kiss apparently fueling something bold inside you that hadn’t been there before. Your fingers trace down, over his abdomen—hardened from work but still soft in all the best places—and Dean takes in a sharp breath, his hands on your hips tightening enough to leave a mark, and you lean back. Just enough to open space between your bodies, just enough for you to palm him through his sweatpants.

He’s huge, and twitching under your careful, light fingers, and God, you need him inside of you in any fucking way—between your hands or filling your mouth or buried deep into your cunt—but Dean’s still just staring at you. His chest heaving, eyes so dark and wanting you might cum just from his attention, and nostrils flaring as you move your hand up, resting right over the hem of his pants. 

“I love you, Dean,” you whisper, the rush of confidence barreling down as you wait for him to do anything. “And you need to tell me now that you don’t love me, or-“ you take a long breath, dragging up the last bit of your nerve. “You need to say you love me, and do something about it.”

Something shatters in Dean’s gaze for the last time, and whatever war he’s been waging with himself reaches a brutal end as he surges back up, kissing you with all spit and bloody need. Like you’re the best thing he’s ever dared to have on his tongue, and he might be trying to chew off a bit of you to keep.

He won’t need to. He has you. He’s had you for a while, and when he leans back to watch you with glazed, hungry eyes, his words seal some deep, fragile part of you to him forever.

“I love you,” Dean grunts your name, scanning over your face like he’s afraid the words will yank you from his hands. They won’t. “I need you. I gotta have you, but I’m- I’m not in control of it right now-“

“I can take it.” You push your hand into Dean’s sweats, taking his cock in your hand. He groans, eyelids fluttering, and when you run your thumb over the head of him—pressing into the weeping slit and squeezing just so lightly—he hisses your name like a prayer. “Please, Dean. I want it. Please.” 

You pull down his pants with your free hand, taking his boxers with them, and start to slowly pump your hand up and down his impressive length. There will be bruising marks of Dean’s hands of your hips for a while, but you’ll survive. It’s worth it, to watch him unravel below you, to see Dean’s pretty eyes grow glazed with lust for you, feel his dick throb and hips jerk under your touch, hear his low growls and grunts as his jaw clenches and he doesn’t pull you away.

“God,” he moans your name, and you start to squirm above him, desperate for a bit of your own relief. “I wanna- Wanna taste you. Fuck you. Ruin you-“

“So do it,” you slip your other hand down—trusting Dean’s hold to keep you upright—and squeeze his balls. “You say you love me, Dean, but you haven’t proved it-“

The words do exactly what you’d wanted them to. Dean yanks your hand from around him, crashes his lips into yours with a fervor that might have been dangerous if it didn’t taste and sound and feel like Dean, and lets go. 

His every movement is rough and uncontrolled, because his tether over every bit of will that had seemed to keep him restrained is gone, and in its wake is only the Mark. All its lust and fury and hunger, primal and focused on you. On taking what it wants.

And you’d give it to him, even if it left a few marks on your skin and bruising on your heart, but you realize that the Mark doesn’t seem to just want to use you. If it did, Dean wouldn’t be sucking on your neck and moaning at the taste of your skin, all while tracing big, warms hands around your body to palm your breasts. He wouldn’t allow you to grind onto him, or whimper his name, or scratch at his skin as he pulls you apart with barely anything at all. When he flips your over without any effort—only a low grunt and flex of his muscles—you feel like the most priceless bag of flour in the word. Perfect to be tossed around like that forever, but worth more to him—more the Mark—than just another body.

And you can’t see him anymore, but you don’t need to. You hear the sounds of him shuffling behind you, the muffled noise of his shirt being tossed onto the floor, and then his voice. Low and feral and saying your name in a way that makes your knees weak. 

“Up.” He grunts, and you whine when he angles your hips up and pulls down your shorts, you already wet cunt being hit by the cold air. “So fuckin’ pretty, gonna ruin you, baby. You’re never gonna even think about a cock that’s not mine again-“

You nod a little stupidly, wiggling your ass back into him and moaning when his still-clothed erection presses right into you. “Fuck, Dean, please-“

He spanks your pussy—just once the stinging pleasure shooing up your spine—and you bury your face in the sheets to stifles your desperate moan. 

“Need ya’ to listen.” He mutters. “You’re gonna have to talk to me, baby, lemme know what feels good, what you’re likin’, what you need more of-“

“You,” you gasp, and Dean chuckles, running a taunting finger between your folds. “God, I need you, Dean, need you so bad-“

“You need me?” He pushes the finger into your cunt, his body moving to covers yours as he whispers in your ear. “Need me to fuck this tight little pussy until you scream? Goddamn prove you how much I’ve wanted you, how much I’ve always wanted you-“

“Yes.” You nod frantically, grinding your ass up into him. “Show me, please show me-“

Dean moves your head to the side, capturing your lips in a long, slow kiss, and hums in satisfaction when he crooks that finger right up against that deep, sensitive spot inside of you, and your hands start to claw at the sheets.  

Then he’s gone. Without warning Dean draws back, yanks his finger out without warning, spanks your pussy again—chuckling at the high, needy sound that escapes your lips—and presses one hand to your lower back to still your writhing as he shuffles behind you

“Tell me whatcha want, baby.” He mutters, moving his hand to rub up and down your thigh. “And I’ll get it for ‘ya. But you have,“ He slaps your pussy one last time for emphasis, and you can only moan. “To say what you-“

“Your cock.” You whisper, spreading your legs wider for his to see. To look at your wet pussy—need dripping down to your knee—and take whatever the Mark is asking of him. “Want your cock Dean. Want you to fuck me, no holding back, please-“

He slams into you without warning. Burying himself at the hilt in one brutal movement, groaning above you as you go limp under him, trying only to twist and touch him, only to push back and somehow get him deeper. You feel so full, so fucking high on the stretch of Dean inside you, but it’s not enough-

“God, sweetheart, you feel so fucking good.” Dean starts to massage your ass, with one hand, the other holding you up in the air for him to use. “Better than I dreamed, feel like heaven, gonna fuck you so good like you deserve-“

“Dean, fuck-” you clench around him, the praise feeding right into your cockdrunk daze of Dean, and he groans. 

“Don’t do that,” he grunts your name, and it sounds like an order. “I ain’t gonna last if you-“ He moans as you squeeze around his massive cock again, and pulls all the way out before slamming back into you with a growl.

Your mouth falls open, a sound like a mewl escaping your mouth, and Dean starts to fuck you. Really, properly fuck you into the mattress, with low groans and an unforgiving pace, bumping your cervix and snaking a hand around your stomach to pull you up to his chest, rubbing your clit until you’re wrecked and seeing stars, thrusting up into you like a jackhammer and keeping you so blissfully pleasured and warm.

“So fuckin’ good,” he growls your name in your ear, and you squeak. “Takin’ this cock so fuckin’ well, all warm and tight, made for me. You were fuckin’ made for me-“

Dean’s thumb and fore finger roll your clit in a tight circle, and you cum with a scream. Light and color lining your vision, the far-off sound of Dean’s filthy praise making your orgasm ride out and out and out until you’re sure you’ve reached something like heaven. Your vision is still blurred when the satisfaction has washed fully through you, and you realize Dean’s stopped moving.

His hand tangles in your hair, angling your face back for him to see, and fuck he’s so handsome. Breathing heavy in your ear, lips puffed from sucking and kiss your skin, eyes glazed but still focused on you.

You must look like an idiot. Your expression is slack and needy, your eyes glazed a lips parted, but Dean looks at you like you’re a diamond and his cock twitches inside you as your eyes meet.

“Shit, baby,” he mutters. “You gotta say somethin’-“

“That-“ You let out another moan, your pussy still fluttering around him. “Good.”

He chuckles, kiss the very corner of your mouth with a smirk. “You got full words, Sweetheart?”

You swallow, the full feeling of Dean—throbbing inside you, still rock hard, pushing against that heavenly spot but with just too little pressure to send you over once more—crashing into you, and you say the only thing you can think of.

“Keep going?” 

He stares at you for a second, then shakes his head. “No, I- I’ll be fine, I can take care of myself-“

“Want you to use me.” You’re practically whining, and you’d be more embarrassed if the words didn’t make Dean jerk up into you. “Please-“

He groans your name, burying his face in the crook of your shoulder. “I’m not- you’re-“

“I said don’t hold back.” You whisper, rolling your hips against him and feeling pride glow in your chest at his moan. “Fuck me, Dean. I’m yours.”

And there it is again. You say the exact right thing, the thing you knew would work, and Dean gives in. He shoves you down, flips you onto your back—pulling out for only a second as he adjusts you under him—and starts to fuck you like an animal. Rutting into you at a near inhuman speed, hitting your cervix with every thrust, every word a low growl that coils release tighter and tighter in your lower gut. 

“So fuckin’ greedy,” he grunts, slamming a little rougher. “Wantin’ more, begging me to fuck you, so fucking pretty comin’ apart on my cock, tell me how good it feels, baby-“

“Good,” you moan, your nails digging into his shoulders as the bed creaks around you, your whole body overwhelmed with pleasure. “Feel so full, Dean, feels so good, you’re so fucking big-“

He groans, and you start to babble. You’re not even sure what you’re saying anymore, because every word feels like it’s spilling from your mouth. But every inch of your brain trapped in Dean’s skin slapping against yours, his muscles flexing around you, the low and primal sounds rumbling out of his chest as his movements grow sloppy and his cock starts to throb inside of you, and you couldn’t think about anything else if you tried.

“You feel so good, Dean, please don’t stop, want you to cum, I-“ You gasp as he starts to kill up your neck, your hands shooting into his hair. “Fuck, Dean, please, so good, God, I love you-“

His mouth slams into yours, and your orgasm rushes through you like a tidal wave. Longer and powerful, leaving you so fucked out you can only whine under Dean’s body, toes curling and eyes rolling back in your head as your pussy flutters around him.

Dean pulls out, keeping one hand gently on your knee as he pumps himself with an almost blurring fist, and cums over your abdomen and thighs. It’s hot and sticky, and part of you wishes you’d had enough of a brain to ask him to let you taste it, but you’re so completely spent that when Dean collapses over you—a heavy, comfortable weight you’re more than happy to be trapped beneath—your brain wipes every other thought but Dean away, and you decide to just stay here. Where Dean’s face in buried in your neck, and your sore from all of it but there will never be a better pain to experience.

“I-“ Dean breaks the silence, words muffled in your skin. “I feel better.”

“Oh.” You huff a soft laugh. “Good.”

“What, uh, what should we tell Sammy?”

You tug on his hair, just enough to move his gaze back to yours. “That we had sex?”

“No,” Dean groans your name, a smile pulling at his lips. “About the Mark. But we should tell him that-“

You make a mock, dramatic gasp. “Dean Winchester, are you going to brag about sex to your brother-“

“It’s sex with you, Sweetheart.” He winks, rolling you both over and caging you comfortably against his chest. “And Sammy’ll be thrilled to hear it, he’s been on my ass for years-“

“Years?” You squeak. “How many years?”

He shrugs. “I dunno, all of them?”

“All of them?! What do you mean all of them-“

“I mean since I met you.” Dean starts to rub soothing circles on your back, his mouth curling in smug amusement. “Deep breathes, baby, you’re gonna hurt yourself.”

You flush, still not really use to the baby thing. Or Dean’s hands on your skin, every touch lingering like an imprint that will never even try to fade. “Shut up-“

He shakes his head. “Nah. You love it.” A boyish, wide smile splits over his face. “You love me.”

You might die. You might explode into a million, tiny pieces of confetti and shimmering glass, because Dean looks so happy. There are no ghosts in his beautiful eyes, no loathing or dread stained over his perfect face. He’s happy, here, with you, and you’re not cruel enough to stop yourself from crawling up his chest and pressing a soft, sweet kiss to his lips.

“I do love you,” you mumble against him, straddling his torso as you push yourself up flat palms. “But I’m still gonna tell you to shut up.”

He chuckles, the sound rolling and humming right into your blood. “And I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Dean reaches up to tuck a little hair behind your ears, and freezes, his eyes trained on his forearm. On the Mark.

“We, uh,” he clears his throat, watching you carefully. “We do need to figure out what we’re gonna do about this.”

“Yeah.” You sigh. “We do. But I, I think-“

You cut yourself off, taking his hand in yours and running light fingers over the Mark in thought. Dean stares up at you with a slight awe in his gaze that makes you feel almost important, and your words fall to a soft breath.

“If you want.” You whisper. “We can turn it back-“

“No.” He shakes his head, sounding almost panicked. “I’m not goin’ back to that shit, not now-“

“Dean.” Your fingers still on his arm. “Was it me? That the Mark wanted?”

He swallows, but nods, and you sigh.

“We’re going to have separate sometimes. And we can figure out the bloodlust-“

“We should have to figure it out though, you don’t gotta put up with that-“

“I know.” You smile at him, and it’s not hard. Smiling at Dean is never hard. “But I will.”

“Do you-“ He stares at you, tangling his fingers in yours. “Do you not want me to keep the betterlust? You can tell me, I don’t want you to feel like you have to, for me-“

“God, no.” You shake your head, squeezing his hand. “I’m just, I’m worried about what might happen when the betterlust decides I’m not enough. Or when this, um, when you-“

Dean says your name, slow and firm, and you swallow. “This is it for me. It’s you, and the Mark knows that. You’re gonna be more than enough, hell, you’re more than I deserve-“

“That’s not true.” You mumble. “You deserve the world.”

He chuckles, pressing a kiss to the palm of your hand. “It’s adorable that you really believe that, baby, but-“

You scowl at him. “It’s the truth, Dean. You’re a good man, I meant what I said-“

“I know you did.” His charming, cowboy grins falters slightly. Not falling, but twisting into one you’ve never seen before. Still roguish, still well designed and stealing your breath, but with a slight crack that allows you to see deeper. To see the lonely part of him, that really thinks you don’t belong here with him. That’s trying to drag you into him, because he’s certain you’ll start running if he doesn’t. “But this,” he nods to the Mark. “Is still gonna be a problem. I’m still gonna be a problem-“

“You’re not a problem-“

He says your name, the word careful and tender and holy from his lips. It’s the best way you’ve ever heard it. The only way you want to hear it again. “Do you want me to keep the betterlust.”

You purse your lips, and nod.

“Words, baby-“

“Yes.” You whisper. “But I need you to promise me that if it stops working-“

“It won’t.” He shrugs, his voice flat, as if he’s speaking in fact. “And we’re gonna keep looking for a way to get this son of a bitch off. But we’re doin’ it together.” He pauses, scanning over your open features. “If that’s what you-“

You lean down, silencing him with a long, easy kiss. It’s not desperate anymore, but careful. Like you’re making art, or starting to spin a web that could unravel with a single tug, but neither of you will let it. You’ll never let this—whatever this becomes—fall apart. You’ll put your whole life into keeping Dean, fighting for him and helping him and reminding him that he’s not really a burden. Letting him remind you that he really does want you, and he’s never going to allow you to doubt that again.

“Together.” You speak against his lips, letting your content breath fall into his mouth. “I’d like to stay together.”

He nods, mouth curving into a grin. “Alright then. Together.”

End Note: Thank you so so much for reading!!! I've had a lot of fun with this one, and I'm so happy y'all have as well! I hope to see some of you soon for the next one, and if not, thank you. no matter what!!

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HII HOW R U?? I was wondering if u could make a yandere caitvi x reader(like a poly relationship). Just headcannons if u like!! I really love ur postss💗💗

Yandere!Caitvi x Reader Headcanons

i’m great, tysm for requesting! sorry it’s taken me a while to get to this ^^

i was gonna add a section on how they kidnap you (figured i’d use it for a different fic) and an nsfw section but i didn’t know if anyone wanted that so i skipped it this time

HOW THEY MEET YOU

ok so vi is the one who notices you first - at first, you’re just another person who blends into the crowd at her fights

but then she begins to see you at every single fight of hers without fail, always with a huge handmade sign that says something like “step on ME, vi” or “vi, you’re the BEST!”

she thinks it’s endearing how someone like you, so unassuming and cute, is hanging around shady dens like this just to support her

you manage to catch her at the bar after one of her fights and you two strike up an unlikely friendship

she starts to fall head over heels for you - you don’t seem to care or even notice that she’s a mess

in fact, you’re hellbent on fixing her and she can’t help but have massive heart eyes at this point even though she’d normally find something like this demeaning (she doesn’t need to be saved!)

all her life, she’s chased after the people she loved and prioritised their well-being and now someone’s finally doing the same for her

you make her feel so seen at a time in her life when she feels incredibly lost and worthless

however it’s at this point vi leaves the fighting scene and reconnects with cait - you gave her the strength to do so

vi always feels guilty about this but you’re always in the back of her mind, a hopeful what if to ponder on the lonely nights after a lover’s quarrel with cait

so it’s nothing short of serendipity when cait starts to come home later and later, talking about a new recruit who has potential that needs to be nurtured and look at that - it’s you

cait knows she needs to be faithful to vi, she would never dream of going behind her back, but she’s drawn to you in a way that simultaneously confuses her and excites her

she becomes your mentor and sees parts of herself in you and that just makes her obsession infatuation that much worse

cait blurs the line between appropriate behaviour between a subordinate and their junior; she shows up at your door randomly for a “work assignment” and pries into the private details of your love life

if she finds out you’re dating someone or interested in someone other than her, your work life becomes a living nightmare

you’ll constantly be admonished for the tiniest infractions simply because she’s wants you all to herself and doesn’t know how to express her emotions in a healthy way

vi can’t even find it in herself to be jealous when she sees the lustre in cait’s blue eyes, one that’s only reserved for her, starts to come out whenever she’s around you but she does feel left out, after all, vi found you first

the two end up having a conversation and realise that they can’t live without you in their lives - all to themselves, that is

OK TIME FOR WHAT THEY’RE LIKE IN A RELATIONSHIP

honestly i think vi is the one you can wrap around your pinkie finger - she has such a soft spot for the people she loves and she’s not afraid of making it known

you want more treats? she’ll sneak them in

you want to go outside? ok, but vi is handcuffing you to her and you can only stay out for five minutes

surprisingly she respects your boundaries and tries not to be overly affectionate with you when you don’t want to be, even if it kills her inside

don’t think you can ask to talk to family and friends though, that’s completely off-limits and you will see a sadistic side to vi she doesn’t normally let out

i imagine her punishments would be something to the effect of her saying extremely cruel and upsetting things to you to remind you of your place

she would also be into physical punishments like spanking but not anything that could really hurt you - she would have a breakdown if she hurt you to the point of serious injury and would never forgive herself

cait on the other hand is essentially the “bad cop” in this scenario, it’s not that she doesn’t love you, in fact i would say she’s probably more obsessed than vi is, it’s that she doesn’t want to risk anything bad happening to you whatsoever

she went lax on punishing zaunites and it ended up with her mother dead - she’s not taking any risks when it comes to you

it harder to tell with cait but she does try to show her affection, it’s just not as obvious as the way she acts to vi

she does like to be physically affectionate with you more than vi does but this too is very subtle

she likes to make these actions seem like a necessity when really it’s for her own satisfaction

e.g. she’ll hold you hand and profess it’s because “you might fall over” even though you can see the faint blush on her cheeks - you’re both aware it’s a terrible lie but are equally too embarrassed to mention it

like in my other work, her shows of affection come from giving you books, painting lessons and expensive clothes, etc. - she wants to nurture your talents and expose you to the finer things in life that you’ve missed out on

she lowkey has a superiority complex when it comes to this lmao but i think she does it all to mask her deep insecurities

she doesn’t want to seem weak in front of her darling

her punishments are more harsh. i feel like she would put you in isolation and leave you hungry if you refuse to abide by her or vi’s rules

i hc that this stems from her childhood; her mother would withhold affection (maybe not to this extent) whenever she misbehaved and this way of thinking carried over to adulthood

this means that caitlyn and vi do tend to argue over what they think is best for you and it lowkey gives divorced parents energy - they’re constantly trying to prove themselves right

it’s a very volatile environment to be in

imo this is kinda cait and vi’s way of flirting too 😭 in the aftermath they look back on it like ‘awww she cares so much about our darling she’s willing to fight over them - so cute!’

their relationship stays mostly the same as it was before just a lil more intense

they’d both be yandere for each other, it just manifests a lot more strongly with you

like, they know they can look after themselves but you’re so weak they need to go above and beyond to ensure their most precious darling is safe

they both plan detailed daily routines for you and you’re micromanaged down to the smallest details: how long you can sleep for, the food you eat, the exercises you do, the clothes you wear, the people you can interact with

in my mind, this takes place at the end of s2 so you live with them in cait’s mansion - they’ve both experienced a LOT of trauma which contributes to them developing a codependent relationship and having to drag someone else into their mess

it’s definitely a stifling relationship and it feels like you’re never truly alone, if for some reason they can’t be there with you there’ll always be a trusted maid or enforcer keeping tabs on you

omg wait they definitely give you a diary and say it’s private but at the end of the night they’ll read through it to see if you’re planning anything they wouldn’t agree with

cait came up with the idea and vi thinks it’s a violation of your privacy but she goes along with it anyway

would never admit it but secretly it’s her favourite time of the day (if she respects your physical boundaries, she’s gotta break some other boundaries - give her a break!)

they just want to patch up the pain they feel from all the losses they’ve had to deal with and unfortunately for you, you’re their bandages

masterlist

[thewritetofreespeech]

Could I request Yuji, Megumi and Inumaki with a reader who is a former delinquent?

“Is it weird being back at your old school?”

“I guess,” [Y/N] agreed. “A lot has changed since I was last here.”

“Oh hells no!!”

“Or…maybe not….”

Yuji & [Y/N] turned around to see an older faculty member marching over to them. A vein nearly popping out of his balding head. “You aren’t allowed on the properly anymore, you hooligan!”

“Hooligan?” Yuji repeated.

“Wishful thinking, Baka-sensei.” The man growled. “I was never ‘banned’ just asked to not return the next semester.”

“Next semester?”

“Which implies you aren’t supposed to be here! I’ll talk to the principal and have you removed by the police!” The teacher threatened.

“Go ahead. He called us.” [Y/N] jeered at him. “Look, if you want me gone, talking is just prolonging our stay. Let us do our jobs and we’ll be out of your hair. What’s left of it.”

The man seemed fit to burst. Rather than argue, however, he just marched back off angrily. Arguing with himself in a mutter as he left. “Who was that guy?”

“An old teacher of mine.”

“What was he going on about? [Y/N]-chan…were you a bad student when you were here?”

[Y/N] chuckled. “I was, perhaps, a bit more spirited than most. I didn’t commit murder or anything.” Yuji was concerned that that was the part the listed as concern. “Come on, let’s find this curse and get out of here.”

“You think you know a person….”

It wasn’t often that they got time off to hang out around the city. In fact, they weren’t supposed to have time off now. But since the mission had ended early [Y/N] insisted on stopping at a local fast-food place to get milkshakes. As a reward.

“Oh man, I missed these. Did you used to get these when you went to school around here Megumi?”

“No.” He told them as he sipped his vanilla shake. “I can’t say that I have.”

Besides money being tight when he was a kid, this area was run by another school’s gang at the time. Though Megumi wasn’t officially in a gang, just a lone wolf taking his anger out on everyone, he still knew better than to come on this side of town.

“Well, you were missing out.”

“Oy! Sea urchin head!” Megumi turned around to take note of the shouting. Realizing very quickly that a teen from a small group was pointing & talking to him. He didn’t know whether he should be confused or just offended. “What are you doing on our side of town?! I know you went to Saitama East, and you have no business being here!”

“I don’t go there anymore.” Megumi told the other teen calmly. “And, I’m just here with a friend.”

“A friend hn?” They repeat with a spit. “Well, that friend isn’t welcome here either. You gotta lot of nerve stepping your crew on our turf! So why don’t you….” The young man’s bravado died down quickly, and Megumi realized he wasn’t looking at him anymore, but past him. “[Y-Y-Y/N]-sama!”

“Yes,” they chirped as they came out from behind Megumi’s frame. “Do I know you?”

“N-N-No! I was a year behind you in middle school!” The teen began to recall the terrifying tale of [Y/N] the Slayer. How they defeated every foe that challenged them. How they single handedly brought all the other clubs and gangs at their school to heel. How they even drew the lines in the city between Saitama East and their school. “Your legend still lives on [Y/N]-sama! We still follow your creed!”

“Creed?” [Y/N] replied in confusion. “Oh…that. I didn't really mean it. I mean, it’s good to have rules. That no honor among thieves crap is for short timers. Hopefully you boys learned a thing or too. Like apologizing when you’re wrong?”

“We’re sorry!” The group unanimously shouted at Megumi. Startling him a little. “We didn’t know that you were with [Y/N]-sama. Please forgive us!”

“Uh…it’s ok…”

“Please let us buy you a new milkshake for the trouble!”

“Thanks…I already got one though. You can…go though.”

“Thank you sir!”

The group then ran off with their tails between their legs faster than his Divine Dogs, and Megumi turned to [Y/N]. “I seem to make an impact on people.”

“I guess.” Megumi agreed, as they left before more adulators showed up. “I didn’t know that we were both so much trouble in middle school.”

“Aww…I think it’s cute.” [Y/N] cooed as they linked their hands. “Like a modern-day Romeo & Juliet. Only with middle schoolers. And no suicide.”

“Who’s the Juliet in this story?” He asked, and [Y/N] laughed at his joke.

“Uni, uni.”

[Y/N] turned to Toge when they heard his voice and saw him pointing to a wall with a bunch of graffiti on it. “Oh, yeah. They don’t really clean this place up that much. This stuff has been here for years.”

“Bento?” He asked. Meaning ‘who did it?’.

“It was a lot of students when I was here. Some just wanted to tag to be rebels. Others, I guess, just wanted to be remembered somehow.”

“Bento?” He asked again. Only this time meaning ‘who did this one?’.

[Y/N] smiled. “I did.” Toge seemed surprised and they put their finger to their lips. “It was a long time ago. Don’t tell anyone.”

“Bento?” ‘why did you do it though?’.

“I don’t know. I guess I was bored. Or…maybe I wanted to be remembered. Before I came to Tokyo High, I still always somehow knew my life would be short. I suppose I wanted a piece of me in the word.”

Toge could understand that. Their lives were usually short. Only the strong, or the clever, or just the downright lucky made it to old age. Who would remember the youngsters when they were gone?

Toge then fished around in his pocket and pulled out a marker. He then walked over to the wall and scribbled a little figure next to [Y/N]’s tag. A small little salmon nigiri with a ghost beside it. “Salmon.”

[Y/N] smiled at him. “I guess we’ll both be remembered then.” They then walked off. Their art and their memory resting into the stone. Maybe one day they would be able to come back and see it. Maybe not. But, it would always be there.

[lacydollette]

BLESSING IN DISGUISE — CHAPTER SEVEN

PAIRING lovely kook!reader (x rafe) x sarah cameron

WARNING(S) flashbacks, reader being confused about her feelings, sarah giving advice, slight fluff, explicit language, chocking, nightmares

SUMMARY torn between your resurfaced feelings for rafe and the attraction towards jj you can’t seem to find peace. so when Sarah notices your unusual quietness she can’t hold back anymore and convinces you to tell her everything.

“This,” Sarah said, taking a sip of her wine and pointing toward the sunset, “is exactly what I needed. No drama, no chaos. Just us, the ocean, and wine. Perfect.” You leaned back on one of the deck chairs of your little yacht, sunglasses perched on your nose. Sarah stretched out beside you, her blonde hair catching the light as she adjusted her bikini strap and sighed satisfied.

You smiled, letting yourself relax into the moment. It had been a while since you felt this kind of peace. Between the chaos of your own feelings, fights, and everything else, a girls’ day with Sarah felt like a breath of fresh air. But as the hours passed, the silence between you began to shift. You could feel Sarah’s gaze flicking to you now and then, her usual easygoing nature replaced with curiosity.

Finally, she sat up, setting her glass down with a soft clink. “Okay,” she said, her voice cutting through the calm atmosphere, “spill.” You turned to her, raising an eyebrow. “What are you talking about?” Yet you knew exactly what she was referring to.

She hesitated, biting her lip, “The argument with Rafe at the bonfire. What the hell happened? I mean, I know Rafe can be… Rafe, but that was different. There’s something going on, and don’t even try to deny it.” You sighed, leaning back in your chair and pulling off your sunglasses. “Sarah—”

“Don’t ‘Sarah’ me,” she interrupted, her tone firm. “I’m your best friend. I can tell when something’s up. And this thing with Rafe? It’s definitely a thing. So spill.”

You hesitated, mind racing. It wasn’t that you didn’t trust Sarah—you trusted her more than anybody. But saying it out loud, admitting everything, was coming to the conclusion that the whole thing was real, and that you’d have to deal with it. “Look,” Sarah said softly, scooting closer to you. “I get it. Whatever it is, it’s complicated. But I’m not here to judge. I’m here because I care about you. And I know my brother can be..a dick. So please, just tell me.”

Her words finally got to you, and you exhaled shakily, setting your glass aside. “Fine,” you murmured. “But you’re right—it’s complicated. Really complicated.” Sarah nodded, her expression encouraging, and you began.

“It started at Midsummers,” you said, your voice quiet. “There was this fight—Rafe and I. I don’t even remember what sparked it exactly, but things got heated. He said some things, I said some things…and then later I wanted to clear my head and took a walk, that’s when I came across Nate.” Sarah’s brows furrowed. “Nate? As in Nate Thompson?”

You nodded, a chill running down your spine at the memory. “Yeah. At first, I thought he was just trying to be friendly, you know? But then…he wasn’t. He wouldn’t take no for an answer, and I didn’t know how to get away.” Sarah’s hand shot out to grab yours, her grip tight. “What did he do?” she asked, her voice trembling with anger.

“He cornered me,” you admitted, your throat tightening. “And I was scared, Sarah. I didn’t know what to do. So in the last second I texted Rafe…and he showed up.” Sarah’s eyes widened, and she leaned closer. “What happened?”

“He pulled Nate off me,” you said, the memory flashing vividly in your mind. “And when Nate wouldn’t back down, Rafe…” You swallowed hard. “Rafe beat the shit out of him. I mean, really went after him. I had to yell at him to stop before he went too far.” Sarah let out a slow breath, her grip on your hand loosening slightly. “That’s..fuck. That’s horrible. Is this why he’s been so on edge?” she muttered.

You nodded. “After that, things got…weird between us. There was this tension—like, we were both trying to pretend it wasn’t, but it was there. And then he started pulling away. He got colder, more distant. I tried to talk to him, but it was like he’d put up this wall, and I couldn’t break through.”

“And then the bonfire,” Sarah said, piecing it together. “Yeah,” you said, running a hand through your hair. “I saw him standing there, and I couldn’t just ignore him anymore. I tried to talk to him, but he shut me out—again. And when I brought up everything that’s happened, he threw it back in my face. He even accused me of…of messing around with JJ, when it’s clearly not his business.”

Sarah’s jaw dropped. “Rafe said that?” You nodded, feeling the sting of his words all over again. “He was so angry, Sarah. And I was angry, too. It turned into this whole thing, and then JJ got involved, and…yeah. You saw how that ended.”

Sarah didn’t respond, just offered you some simple comfort which you appreciated more than anything. You looked down at your hands, unable to meet her eyes. “I don’t know what to do,” you admitted. “I keep telling myself I should walk away, that he’s too much. But then I think about everything he’s done—how he’s tried to protect me, even when it hurts. And I just…I can’t let go.”

Then, out of nowhere, Sarah turned to you, her voice cutting through the quietness. “Do you still love him?”

The question hit you like a punch to the guts. Your mouth opened, but no words came out. You glanced away, suddenly finding the wine glass in your hand much more interesting than the intensity in her eyes. “Do you?” she pressed, leaning forward slightly.

You sighed, setting the glass down and running a hand through your hair. “I…I don’t know, Sarah,” you admitted, though the hesitation in your voice betrayed you.

Her expression softened, but only slightly. “You do,” she said quietly, her words not a question but a statement. “You still love him. Even after everything.” You didn’t respond, and that silence said more than words ever could. Sarah shook her head, letting out a dry laugh. “God, you’re both so hopeless,” she said, though her tone held a trace of affection beneath the exasperation. “He’s put you through hell, you know that, right?”

“I know.. Believe me, I know.” you whispered, your voice heavy with emotion. “And yet, here you are,” she continued, gesturing between the two of you. “Sitting on this yacht, tearing yourself apart over him. And I know him, too. Rafe’s probably doing the same thing right now, in his own messed-up way.” You looked up at her, surprised by her understanding. “You think he…?”

“Loves you?” Sarah interrupted. “Yeah, I do. As much as he’s capable of loving anyone, at least. But that doesn’t mean he’s good for you, or that this whole back-and-forth is healthy for either of you.”

She paused, studying you closely. “And what about jj?” she added, her voice softer now. “I’ve seen the way he looks at you, the way you’ve been spending more time with him. It’s like he’s your safe place when everything else feels like it’s falling apart.”

You bit your lip, the weight of her words sinking in. She wasn’t wrong. JJ had been a constant presence in your life these past few weeks—funny, kind, and steady in a way that Rafe never was. But as much as you cared for him, your heart felt tangled up in something far more complicated.

Sarah reached out, taking your hand in hers again. “You need to make a decision,” she said gently but firmly. “This thing with Rafe and JJ? It’s not fair to either of them, or to you. You have to figure out what you want, and who you want to be with.” You swallowed hard, the weight of her advice settling heavily on your shoulders. “What if I make the wrong choice?” you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.

Sarah squeezed your hand, her expression softening. “There’s no ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ choice here,” she said. “There’s just what feels right for you. But you need to figure it out, because dragging this out is only going to hurt everyone involved.”

You nodded slowly, the truth of her words sinking in. “Thanks, Sarah,” you said, your voice quiet but sincere. “Of course,” she replied, giving you a small, reassuring smile. “And no matter what happens, I’ve got your back. Always.”

As the yacht gently rocked beneath you, you leaned back into your chair, staring out at the endless ocean. For the first time in weeks, you felt like you were starting to see things clearly. Now all you had to do was make up your mind.

“Come on,” Rafe whispered, his grin infectious as he grabbed your hand and pulled you away from tannyhill. “Let’s get out of here before my dad ropes us into some lecture about responsibility.”

You followed him, laughing as the two of you sprinted past the yard and down towards the beach, leaving behind the faint hum of the party. The adrenaline of sneaking away had both of you giggling like little kids.

Eventually, you stopped in a neighbor’s backyard, Rafe doubling over and panting like he’d just finished a marathon. “Out of shape already, Cameron?” you teased, leaning against a fence and crossing your arms. “What are you, an old man?”

He looked up, still catching his breath, and gave you a glare. “You wanna say that again, smartass?” You smirked, tilting your head. “Oh, I’m sorry. Should I fetch your cane, Grandpa?” Rafe straightened up, a mischievous glint in his eye.

But before he could reply, the sudden flicker of a porch light snapped you both to attention. The faint murmur of voices drifted through the air, and without thinking, Rafe grabbed your wrist and pulled you behind a small garden cabin. “Shit,” he whispered, his voice low and hurried as the two of you pressed up against the wooden wall.

Your heart pounded in your chest, not from fear, but from the electric tension that crackled between you. Rafe’s body was close—too close. You could feel the heat radiating off him, the sweet scent of his cologne mixed with the faint smell of tequila. His hand was still on your wrist, his grip firm but not rough. “Nice move, genius,” you whispered, your lips inches from his ear. “Now we’re stuck.”

“Shh,” he hissed, turning his head toward you. His face was so close that you could see the faint freckles dusting his nose, the way his blue eyes glistened even in the dim light. “I’m just saying,” you murmured, your tone playful despite the situation. “Maybe next time we sneak off, you pick a better spot for a pit stop.”

He rolled his eyes but didn’t pull away. If anything, he leaned in closer, his chest brushing against yours as he peered around the corner to check if the coast was clear. The porch light still on, but the voices were moving farther away. “We’re fine,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. But neither of you moved.

The air between you grew heavier, the space shrinking until it felt like there was nothing left but the two of you. You could feel the rise and fall of his breath, the faint tremble in his hands as they hovered near your sides. “Rafe, I—“ you mumbled, your voice softer now, uncertain. He looked down at you, his eyes searching yours. And then, before you could say anything else, he leaned in and kissed you.

It wasn’t rushed or harsh, but it wasn’t gentle either. His lips were warm and firm against yours, his hands finding their way to your waist as though they belonged there. The world fell away, the faint hum of the party, the glow of the porch light, the thrill of sneaking away—it all disappeared.

For those few moments, there was only him.

When he finally pulled back, his forehead resting against yours, both of you were breathless. “Well,” he murmured, his voice low and teasing, “that definitely shut you up.” You couldn’t help but laugh softly, your heart still racing.

But just as the sweetness lingered, something shifted.

Rafe’s gentle, playful expression began to change. His warm blue eyes darkened, clouded with something sharp and unrecognizable. His soft hands, the ones that had held your waist so carefully, moved to your throat, his fingers curling tightly around your neck.

“R-Rafe,” you gasped, your voice barely a whisper. The world around you darkened. His grip tightened, his once familiar touch now terrifying, cutting off your airflow.

His face loomed closer, but it wasn’t the Rafe you’d kissed behind the garden cabin. His features twisted with anger, his lips curling into something cruel, exactly like the last night you had seen each other before you left. “You think you can leave me?” he hissed, his voice sharp and menacing.

Your chest burned as you struggled, your hands clawing at his wrist, desperate for air. The world a big blur, and just when you thought you’d pass out, it all shattered. You woke with panic in your bones, gasping for breath, your chest heaving. The darkness of the room pressed down on you, but it was real, you were fine.

Turning your head, you found Sarah lying peacefully beside you, her blonde hair splayed out over the pillow, her soft breaths steady and calm. The sight of her brought you back to reality, the terror of the dream slowly fading away. You pressed a trembling hand to your throat, reassuring yourself that there was no hand there, no pressure cutting off your air. It was just a dream.

Just a dream.

LINKS .ᐟ series’ masterlist

LTAGS .ᐟ @gibson-g1rl @glitterybombshell @beausling @rafescokewhore @rafeysbunny @rafesweetie @rafeslacy @rafesangelita @rafey-baby @starkeysprincess @starzify @drewspinkbunny @whinyangel @nativegirltapes @littlelamy @lizziesangel @httpsdrewstarkey @cherrygirlfriend @lilithblackkk @maybankslover

[majinael]

DEFENDING HIS EGO

"But seriously, that Kaiser guy is way too arrogant. I can't stand him. I don’t get how anyone can be friends with a guy like that."

The words cut through the chatter in the cafeteria as I sat with a few of my teammates and their friends. My ears perked up, and I couldn’t help but glance at the speaker like he’d just declared the sky green.

"If I were a player like him, I'd probably act the same way, to be honest," I replied, the words leaving my mouth before I could stop them.

I hadn’t planned to engage, but the comment was too ridiculous to ignore. My response made him pause, glancing around at his friends for backup before shooting back with a sneer.

"Oho, does someone have a little crush? Should I remind you he doesn’t even know you? And if he did, he’d probably treat you like his little lapdog… what’s his name again? Ness, right?"

My jaw clenched. I’d spoken to Kaiser before—briefly, as a novice trainer—but it wasn’t the nightmare everyone made it out to be. Few had the chance to interact with Bastard München’s ace, so how would they know? What really got under my skin wasn’t the trash talk—it was the insecurity practically dripping from his words.

"Alright, on that note, I’ll leave you to your mocking and shit-talking better players. Maybe that’s the secret formula for you to finally score something."

I stood up and left quietly, knowing any further discussion was a waste of breath. With guys like that, the conversation would only circle back to their egos.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Later that day, I found myself in the nursery, discussing recovery with a nurse about a player I was supposed to train. He’d injured himself during a match, and we were listing through what to avoid. As I exited, someone familiar slipped into the room behind me. I didn’t get a chance to see who it was before the door closed.

Turning back down the corridor, I stopped short. Standing in front of me, as unmistakable as ever, was Bastard München’s Number 10.

Kaiser.

It was rare to see him wandering these parts of the facility. I could only assume whoever had entered the nursery was connected to him somehow.

"Unusual of you to wander around these boring corridors, Kaiser," I said casually, my gaze flicking to his face. His cold expression softened slightly, though his cocky smile didn’t fade.

"Sometimes they’re not so boring," he replied with a shrug.

"Oh? How so?" I asked, looking around theatrically, searching for whatever "interesting" thing he was referring to. When I looked back at him, I caught him pointing at me, and my brows furrowed in confusion.

Before I could say anything, he reached out, placing a hand on my head and ruffling my hair.

"I can’t lie—defending me like that earlier? Didn’t expect it. I surely didn’t know you cared so much," he said softly, though the teasing undertone was unmistakable.

My face betrayed me instantly. My ears burned, and my cheeks flushed hot.

He overheard that? Does he think I’m some kind of fangirl now?

"I-I... If it were any other good player, I’d have said the same!" I stammered, trying to regain some composure. But I didn’t move away as his hand slid down to my chin, his fingers brushing my cheek. The touch only deepened my embarrassment, my cheeks now practically glowing.

"Denial... how cute," he said, his voice low and almost amused. "But I never said I hated having a little fangirl."

There it was.

With a smirk, he let go and walked past me, heading into the nursery, likely to check on whoever had summoned him here in the first place. I was left standing alone in the empty corridor, completely flustered, already overthinking our next interaction.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

HIIIII ! This is my first fanfiction on this blog, very short and simple but I think a very good training to not get Kaiser OOC, I'll try my best to keep it up, aswell as I'll try being as gender neutral as possible in the future (if possible) but for this one I really wanted to use the term either fangirl/fanboy, the term sounds so ridiculous and it definitely is something Kaiser would say imo. I hope you can still dive into this short fan fiction by replacing the word for whatever works for you. Byyye <3

[ticklish-hanji]

These light touches

Warning: This is a tickle fic. If you don’t feel comfortable with this kind of fiction, I’d recommend you don’t read it

lee: jisung

ler: bangchan

It was a normal day. Chan and Jisung had a wired autocomplete interview in a few hours and they were getting ready. Doing their makeup, wearing clothes that fit the HOP aesthetic and then left for the studio.

Once they arrived they sat down and chatted a little with the staff. Jisung turns to his hyung and expresses an issue he has.

“Hyung” he said, “I’m a little nervous. Do you mind us practicing English a little?”. Bangchan felt like he’d just been hit by a wave full of cuteness. He pets his first kid’s head and says “Of course, Jisungie. What kind of question is that?”, he says as he tickled his chin. Han lifted his head once the ticklish sensation took over his skin and let out a smile. “You really are sensitive to light touches, aren’t you?”, Han’s cheeks now had a beautiful pink colour, and the best part? It wasn’t his makeup. He was indeed sensitive and too shy that his weakness was known to every of his members.

The interview started not long after that and they reached the point of the questions that go like “Which is Han’s/Bangchan’s…”

It was Bangchan’s turn to hold the template. He rips off the last sticker which was hiding the following question: “Which is Bangchan’s weakness?”.

“Oohhh,” said Chan, giggling nervously. He wasn’t too open about his weaknesses, just like every person. “I think this is something Han should reveal.”.

Han looks at him and starts giggling mischievously. He looks at the camera and says “When we don’t pay attention to him. He sits in a corner alone and pouts.”

Although he didn’t say anything false and although Chan was proud of his English, that didn’t mean that the oldest felt exposed.

Moving on, it was Jisung’s turn. The first question was the same as Chan’s last. Han holding the template he rips off the sticker and reads, “Which is Han’s weakness?”, now he was a nervous blushing mess. He even felt a little helpless. He knew however that his hyung wouldn’t say anything that’d be too private. “Would you like to answer, hyung?”, he said, his (nervous) smile not leaving his face.

“Of course! We were actually talking about this before the interview started.”. Han was confused, he was trying to remember what they’d said, until he realised what it was.

“So, Han’s weakness is light touches. He can’t stand them, they tickle him sooo much.”, said, tickling lightly his neck, resulting Jisung letting out a small squeal and grabbing his hyung’s hand “DO NOT” he said, in his British-like accent. Chan laughed it off and they continued the interview.

Once it finished, they thanked everyone and got in the car to go back. Sitting next to each other, chatting, laughing etc., Chan suddenly pokes Jisung’s sides.

“AH! No no no, don’t start.”, Jisung said, smiling nervously. Everyone knows his ticklish he is, Chan knows that also. Better than anyone else. “Why not Jisungie? Are you ticklish?”, he says playfully. Han looks at him confused at his question. Did they live in a different dorm? Were they in different groups? Didn’t he an hour or so ago say himself that Jisung was indeed ticklish?

“Chan-hyung, are you okay? Of course I am, just like you”, he stated, trying to remind his hyung that even if he got him now, Han would get him back later.

“I know I’m ticklish, Han. Too much if you ask, but that doesn’t make you less ticklish, you know. I might be reaaally ticklish, but, man, you’re ticklish as HELL.”. He wasn’t wrong, he also knew exactly what he was doing. He wanted to make Han feel vulnerable so the tickles he’d receive later on would have a stronger effect.

Jisung was now blushing, he knew everything Chan had just said was true, whether he liked it or not. “Stop it. I know. You are not any better though.”, he said, trying to get himself out of the trap he felt he was in.

“Actually I am. I know, I’m ticklish everywhere, but not at the same level as you. Where do you even want me to start? You neck? Your armpits? Your ribs? Your sides? Or your feet? And it goes without being said that you already feel ticklish at these spots, just by me mentioning them.” It was true.

“Hyung…”, he could see it in Chan’s eyes, he was about to get tickled and there was nothing he could do about it. He was too tired after all, he wouldn’t be able to fight it for long. After a certain point, he’d just have to bare it and let it happen.

Chan made an attempt to tickle Han’s belly. Jisung grabbed them both before he could touch him “Don’t” he said. He was smiling however and, even if he wanted to seem scary, he wasn’t able to. Chan made it out of Han’s grip and tickled him anyways. Han just felt his hyung’s fingers all over his stomach, being already sensitive, and fought with his life to protect the spot that was now being tickled.

“AHAHAHAHA DOHOHONT!”. Chan was in awe watching his baby being tickled, especially when he knew how ticklish he was. When he noticed that Jisung was too busy protecting his tummy, he moved on to his armpits, wiggling his fingers in them. That’s when Jisung absolutely lost it and all his powers left him. He was now in his hyung’s mercy. He wasn’t able to fight back, so he just let him do it. He knew after all that sooner or later everything would end.

“HYUHUHUNG IT TIHICKLEHES HAHAHAHAHA”, he said, hugging himself. “I know Hannie, I know.”, Chan said. He stops. Han looks relieved and takes a deep breath. He thinks that it’s over now, it must’ve been a century. At least that’s what it felt like.

“Are you dohone?”, he asked full of hope. Chan laughed like the question he’d just heard was the stupidest thing ever. “Of course not, my little quokka. You think you’d get away with 30 second of tickling? That was just the beginning.”. Now Han lost every hope.

Chan grabs Jisung’s right leg and puts it on his lap. Han panics. Chan takes off Han’s shoe. He panics even more, you can see the pure terror in his eyes.

Chan begins by tickling lightly under Han’s knee, making him jump and let out a squeak “No no no no no, don’t you dare, don’t touch me there. And leave my foot alone. I’m too tired to fight back.”

“Even better!” Chan locks Jisung’s ankle between his thighs and lightly tickles his soles. That alone was enough for Han to laugh so hard that tears started rolling down his cheeks.

“HYUHUHUHUNG PLEAHAHASEHE LEHET GOHOHOHO” he said, turning around, jumping up and down helplessly. It was too much for him. “Is my Jisungie really that ticklish?”

“IHIHIT’S TOO MUHUHUCH! PLEAHAHASE STOHOHOP IHIHIT! MAHAHAKE IT STOHOP!”. The fact that his foot was trapped made it 100 times worse.

“Be careful kids, and please a little bit quiet. I’m driving.”, said the driver, who was trying to concentrate. Chan stopped. Jisung started breathing heavily.

“How about I tickle you and you try to keep quiet? Let’s do it like a challenge. Remember like when you were a “statue” and Seungmin was touching you along with Felix and how that tickled you? You kept quiet, you only said “it tickles.” Chan suggested.

“How about you don’t tickle me at all?”

“Why’s that?”

“Because I’m ticklish, hyung. I really can’t stand it, especially now that I’m tired. It tickles way too much and I feel like I’m gonna pass out.”, he said, playing serious so Chan would really stop.

“You really are ticklish, aren’t you?” Chan said, sweetly smiling at his younger member.

“Yes, hyung, I am. I’m really ticklish and when you trapped my foot I felt the ticklishness taking all over me. Really, I can’t stand it. What else do you want me to say? Okay, listen here. Chan-hyung, I’m extremely ticklish and even the slightest touch can tickle me sooo much to the point I might accidentally kick or hit someone. That day with the “statue” thing, I was so ticklish i couldn’t even stay still, and Seungmin didn’t even want to actually tickle me. I just was ticklish. Jeongin is also ticklish, more that anyone I know. You are ticklish, even at the thought of it. Every member is ticklish, and so am I. I’m a human being and a sensitive one. Is that what you wanted me to admit?”

“Yes, it was. Without the ‘you’re ticklish too’ part, of course.”, he said.

“You are though”

“I know I am. Anyways, thank you for telling me. I hope you know that doesn’t mean I’ll stop tickling you, right?”

“I’m sure about that, hyung, but I don’t mind it. As long as it’s someone from the group and it’s not too much, I’m somewhat fine with it.”

The rest of the drive was nothing special. They chatted and joked around like before Han’s torture. Only they poked a little bit each other every 5 or 10 minutes.

[starhvney]

HI STAR 🗣‼️‼️‼️ hope all is well 🙏🏼😁 and for your event, can I pretty please have Gene with

Tea, cream and cinnamon rolls ☝🏼🗣⁉️

𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫 𝟎𝟑: 𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐮𝐩 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐮𝐬𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐫!!

𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: romantic tension, fluff, snowy storm

𝐚/𝐧: yes you may!!🫵🏻‼️

𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 ☆ 𝐖𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐄𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

Crossing your arms over your chest, a deep chill runs through your body as you stand too close to the window. Even with the glass as a barrier and the heater doing its best to warm up Gene’s apartment, the snow that continues to pile on the ground and the wind that whistles against the side of the apartment building sends an unbeatable cold through the flooring that made your feet tingle and shoulders shake.

It had been snowing before you even got here, but it didn’t lighten up in the slightest like the forecast said before. If anything, the snowfall has quadrupled at this point. You might be stuck here for more than just a day if it continues at this rate.

“You know, staring at the window won’t make the snow go away.” His deep voice startles you from your thoughts, muscles tensing as you nearly jump from your skin.

“Oh! Hey…”

He was closer than you expected, his significant height forcing you to crane your neck up to get a look at his face. An amused smirk tugs at his lip piercing, one of his eyebrows hitched up at your stressed and jumpy attitude.

“What’cha doing, huh?”

“Just… worried about the weather.”

“Quit stressin’, doll. Being stuck with me isn’t so bad, is it? I won’t bite,” he teases, hand landing on your lower back and guiding you from the window towards his kitchen. “C’mon. This isn’t so bad. I’ll even sleep on the couch and let you take my bed.”

“Do you think this will last that long?” you glance back at the window, biting your lip.

He sucks in a breath through his teeth, shaking his head with a disappointed sigh. “Ouch. Do you really not want to spend time with me that much?”

“No! I’m enjoying spending time with you.”

He taps under your chin before letting you go, walking over to the coffee pot. “That’s what I thought.”

You can’t even form a response to that, mouth gaping open like a fish on land as your ears start to burn.

“Sorry. I can’t resist teasing you, even now. Can you blame me?” he leans on the island, tilting his head with a smile. “Some old habits die hard.”

Before you could muster anything, he continues. “And to answer your question, it doesn’t look like the snow is gonna go anywhere anytime soon.

“But, I don’t have anything to stay over. No change of clothes or anything…” you wring your hands.

“Hey, hey, hey. You can wear some of my clothes while we wash yours. Besides, the roads should be cleared by some time tomorrow. Don’t stress, sweetheart.” He directs a challenging look at you, raising his eyebrows as he waits for a rebuttal.

“Yeah… okay.”

“Good. See? Everything’s fine,” he nods approvingly. “Now, I’m making some decaf. Want some? Or tea… hot chocolate?”

“I’ll take some hot chocolate… thank you.”

“Of course, doll,” he grins, waving you over. “C’mon. We can make some snacks and binge some TV before- sorry, if the power goes out. Yeah?”

“Mhm,” you smile back, your previous stresses starting to roll off your back at his insistence.

“There’s that pretty smile,” he nudges your side with his elbow. “Maybe if you get too cold we can sit extra close under the blankets, hm?”

“W-what?”

“Huh? What?” He glances around with a confused look on his face, scratching his head. “I didn’t say anything.”

“You did!”

“Did what?” He looks back at you, mouth shifting rapidly between amused and faux bewilderment.

“You said-“ you stop, narrowing your eyes when he leans closer, face turning expectant and smug as he tilts his chin up for you to continue.

“I did what, doll?”

“Shut up.”

He bursts out in laughter. “I didn’t say anything! And after I kindly offered my home and even my bed. I should take the offer back and sleep in my own bed!”

“No. I’ll sleep in it anyways.” You cross your arms.

A cheshire like grin spreads across his face as he leans down, just inches from your face. “Oh? You wanna share my bed with me, doll? Don’t threaten me with a good time…”

“That’s not-! Shut up!”

©starhvney 2024. do not plagiarize, feed to any AI, or repost my works to any sites.

taglist: @wasting-away-on-the-internet @angelhyperfixates @valentique @arienic @dazedbydeath @theaquaticplant @starsbrightly @kalegrinch @izzybella1807 @marst4rz

[schlatt-love-bot]

Classroom Dad - Schlatt x Teacher!Reader Headcanon

I got the idea of Schlatt being a “classroom dad” in my head and couldn’t get it out omg, so enjoy my ramblings! For this, Teacher!Reader is at the elementary level :) 

When you met, Schlatt was both in awe of your profession and confused 

“So…listen, I get loving kids and loving learning and all that mushy gushy feel good shit…but you mean to tell me you only get paid that much for dealing with those little shits? …why do it?” 

After dating for a while, though, he began to love the crew of kids in your classroom just as much as you did, maybe even a little bit more 

“Tell me, did the kids give you any more gossip during indoor recess? Is Johnny really into Samantha??” 

He would get a kick out of the stories you’d be bringing home each and every day

On the flipside, though, he would know exactly when you walked through the door on a tough day, were behaviors were out of whack or a lesson didn’t go as planned 

“Awwwh, baby, come ‘ere, talk to me. I’m brewin’ you a cup of tea, and then you can tell me everything that went wrong today.” 

He had a blanket on standby for when the days got so tough you just came home and needed to cry it out 

After being together for so long, he had a strong understanding of just how emotionally taxing the job was, and how much came with it

Would HAPPILY play student for you when you needed to practice a lesson or activity you’ve never done with a class before 

“Babe this worked out perfectly! I forget that you have the IQ of a 4th grader sometimes…”

“Hey! Not nice! I could walk away right now and leave you to figure out why my animal cell and my plant cell look exactly the same!”

Heard you complain once about your district not providing you with a class set of materials you needed, and he IMMEDIATELY bought in on the spot

“Babe, why did a case full of number 2 pencils just show up at our door…?”

“You said the kids needed them…” 

It’s gotten to the point where if he sees something he thinks you need in your classroom or something your students would like, he buys it and presents it to you 

“Schlatt! A guinea pig??” 

“What! I figured you could use a classroom pet!! I wanted to get a classroom cat, but figured those shitheads wouldn't be able to handle it....plus allergies, y'know?” 

Constant supplier of fun trinkets and toys for your classroom prize bin

“Schlatt, the kids are complaining about the ratio of squishies to stickers…” 

“On it, boss. More squishies will be at our door by the end of the week.” 

Your students BEGGED you to finally meet their infamous “classroom dad”

“Guys…Mr. Schlatt works a lot, I don’t know if I could get him to come by and visit…” 

You mentioned it in passing during dinner one night, and Schlatt’s eyes lit up 

“You mean to tell me…they want me there? To meet me? What can I do?” 

And suddenly you’re having a “secret reader” come in at the end of the day to read the next chapter of the book you’re reading as a class 

The kids were excited, thinking it was one of their parents, like they were used to from 1st and 2nd grade 

But when Schlatt walked through the door??

You were chopped liver, these kids were treating him like he was a damn king in the classroom! 

“Mr. Schlatt, how is it living with Miss (Y/N)?” 

“Well, how is she in here?” 

“She’s kind and cares about us, but she can be annoying with the amount of work she makes us do…”

“Yeah..that sounds about right, kiddo.” 

You were making a mental note to never do this, ever, again

Until you noticed just how engaged the kids were in listening to Schlatt read 

Schlatt was doing his best performance, making up voices and giving the kids a show

They were listening to every word coming from his mouth, hook, line, and sinker 

…until he left them on a cliffhanger

“WHATTT???”

“MISS (Y/N)!!!! HOW COULD YOU?!?” 

“MR. SCHLATT PLEASSEEEEE, KEEP GOING!!” 

He looked at you with his best puppy eyes 

“Yeah, Miss (Y/N), can we keep going?” 

You chuckled, shaking your head as the entire class plus your boyfriend were begging to continue reading the book

“Guys, I wish I could let Mr. Schlatt continue, but your buses are about to be loaded in 5 minutes, we need to get ourselves packed up and ready to go!” 

The kids, and Schlatt, let out a collective groan before shuffling to get their belongings together

Schlatt lingered, waiting until every last kid left, helping you with closing down your classroom for the day 

“Yknow, toots, that was actually a lot of fun.”

“Good! I’m glad you thought so…we could definitely use a secret reader again for when we start Frindle…”

“You know I’m your man, baby. All you need to do is ask.” 

You told Schlatt to leave without you, needing to do a couple more things before leaving for the day

Reluctant, he left without you, greeting you at the door with your favorite slippers, a glass of wine, and dinner already made 

“I get why you come home so exhausted, now, I was only with those kids for what, 30 minutes? I’m absolutely exhausted!” 

You let out a laugh, glad he understood your daily exhaustion on a personal level now 

“Seeing you with those kids, though…it’s got me thinking…” 

You raised your eyebrow, signalling him to continue

“What if…what if we start workin’ on our own little gremlin…” 

You nearly choked on your wine, cheeks beginning to get hot with blush 

“Think about it, doll, and then get back to-” 

“Yes. We should. In fact…we should get started right now..” 

Not much dinner was eaten that night, but both you and Schlatt certainly had your fill of dessert…

[sora-fish]

Specter was almost relieved when he saw Heart- even if that was short lived. It was someone he recognized- but a sense of dread, an incoming doom approached him as he acted like this was normal- and it was then he realized that Heart would be no help. He let out a small huff- not able to do anything else for now- trying to look away from heart as best he can- he felt so, so sick. When heart went out of his line of sight- he looked back up to the ceiling. Think- for fucks sake specter think- there must be something to help you out here— but he couldn’t find anything. His hearing was going in and out of his head, sometimes taking the moment to listen and really- what an odd question. It was only a couple seconds after thinking this that heart shoved whatever was in his hand into specter mouth, causing him to panic but really- what could he do about it- as he slowly got feeling in his head, he tried to pull away from Hearts hand. He coughed- choking on the saliva that had collected from having his mouth completely numb. Specter took a moment to gain his bearings, deep breaths. You’re gonna be ok. You’ll be fine. “I- I don’t know-? I guess just stay as it is.. what do you mean by that- what’s going on? Why can’t I move- please I’m so confused—“ Specter sounded desperate at his point, any answer would be worth it at this point..

Grabs you, you like Williams who are a little crazy I say pointing at bell

Oh absolutely :333, I love love love wills who are a little crazy :3 staring at you with my autistic eyes

[why-the-heck-not]

12.09.23, tuesday

I feel like I was on the move the whole day today, but I don’t know where the time went??? Woke up, went to a meeting, from there to a grocery store, came back home and left to the gym after a quick snack, was home for like 2h before leaving to the campus again and went to a grocery store (again yes bc forgot things lol). I just got back home and now I should start winding down for sleep ?? Like tf where did this day go, why do I feel like I got nothing done but still was productive ?? Is this what life is like for ppl who aren’t home 24/7 ???

things done today:

4h focused time (a meeting, submitted an essay and some peer reviews, studying/coding)

gym workout

grocery store x2 bc i’m a dummy

[panthermouthh]

A podcaster I listen to just spent an episode describing what his neurodivergent burnout is like for him, and it’s the first time someone’s experience has actually really resonated with me. It affirming and concerning lol

[satoruxx]

it’s been a few hours and i’m still very angry and upset at this ending like wow ofc i’m mad about gojo not coming back but the overall downfall of this series has me baffled…