#like to me it isn't but what do i know
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Speculative Biology of Euclydeans (and Bill Cipher) part 3
Part 1, Part 2, Part 4
Reproduction and growth
I highly recommend reading the second part before this! This part is the continuation of second part and it talks about Euclydean reproductive system. I separated it because some people find reproductive anatomy NSFW.
As always, this analysis is based on two assumptions:
Before Bill Cipher became a demigod, he was a biological, living organism and so were the rest of his species.
Even after Bill Cipher became a demigod, he still retained some physical characteristics of his biological form.
There will be anatomic diagrams and discussions of pregnancy in this part, so content warning if you're sensitive about those topics.
And without further ado, let's get into it!
Reproductive system
One thing that we know for certain about Euclydeans is that they reproduce sexually. Bill has parents, a mother and a father and that is only possible in species that sexually reproduce. Because we know that we also know that males have testes and females have ovaries. This is because of biological definitions of male and female - a male is an organism that produces a lot of microgametes (small reproductive cells that don't have nutrients to feed the embryo) and a female is an organism that produces far less macrogametes (large reproductive cells that contain nutrients for the embryo). Hermaphrodites produce both types of gametes and some organisms produce neither - those are sexless.
Euclydeans most likely had males and females. Bill understands concept of gender, but also the one of sex. He claims that his species had 14 billion genders, but when talking about sexes, he only uses two: male and female. Now I don't know for sure whether Bill is a biological male, however, most of the insane shit he says points towards it. Whether it is him making inappropriate jokes about knocking up your mother or adopting toxic masculinity traits that humans have and also refusing to possess women all point towards him being a male.
Bill gets extremely uncomfortable when someone wants to touch or measure his sides, especially his "hypotenuse". Bill is an equilateral triangle, so he doesn't have a hypotenuse, but I tend to believe that what he calls hypotenuse is actually his base. Since touching Bill's base makes him incredibly upset and he calls people who do so "creeps", it's fair to conclude that that is where his reproductive organs are located. And it makes sense: in vast majority of animals reproductive system is located on the body side opposite of the brain.
I believe that Euclydeans give live birth. Bill is usually grossed out by humans and when he is, he is very vocal about it. There are only two human body parts that he isn't grossed out by: the brain and the uterus. I believe that's because those parts are similar to their equivalents in Euclydeans. Bill said that he was born, not hatched and he seems uncomfortable around the idea of laying eggs. He is completely comfortable with the idea of a live birth and uteri, so much so that he has actually depicted himself inside a human uterus which is an honor only brain has gotten from him.
This means that Euclydean females probably have a very similar uterus to humans and they give live birth. This also means that the fertilization happens inside the female, so males very likely have some kind of copulatory organ. Copulatory organ is basically a means for a male to deposit his sperm inside the female. In mammals it's called penis, in reptiles a hemipenis and so on. I don't know how would Euclydean copulatory organ look like, but it acts like a hemipenis - it's coiled inside their shell when it's not in use.
Despite having a uterus, Euclydeans are for sure not placental mammals and they definitely don't feed their babies milk. Thanks to Bill asking Ford why he didn't eat Stan while they were in their mom's belly, I have a theory that Euclydeans feed their fetuses via adelphophagy. Also referred to as "intra-uterine cannibalism", adelphophagy basically means that the mother produces a large amount of yolk-rich eggs and deposits them in her uterus. Some of those get fertilized and the others serve as food for her embryo. However, the goal is to nurture just one embryo while the rest will get used as food for it! This is a technique used by some sharks and it fits so well with Euclydeans too, since they, just like sharks and humans give very few births throughout their life - less than 10 and it's almost always to one baby. Adelphophagy is very hard on the mother because she has to produce a huge amount of yolk for her baby to eat, so she will have to have a "recovery period" when she won't be able to get pregnant again.
This also means that Euclydean fetuses have developed teeth and ability to kill and digest their unborn siblings. That is fucked up, but it's normal for them. Hell, human pregnancy could be called "intra-uterine parasitism" because our babies feed on mom's nutrients. And the baby that turns out to be stronger that the other embryos has already passed the natural selection test and is viable to live outside of mom.
Euclydean babies are born with teeth and they are capable of eating the same things that their parents do. They are also born with a very soft shell. Since the mother has to push the baby out of her vagina, just like we do, their babies are super soft and squishy so that they could leave the womb with as little trouble as possible. That super soft exoskeleton is why baby Bill is shown having yellow arms. The shell is as soft as skin and when baby's limbs are retracted into it they can actually use it as skin. Besides, Euclydeans are cold-blooded so babies, who are smaller and thinner than adults and have very little protection might want to keep their limbs inside the shell as a means of keeping warm.
There's one part here about males that I didn't talk about and that's the hat. The hat is a living part of a Euclydean and out of Bill's parents only one is shown having it. Since Bill has it too and he's a male, his father was the one with the hat. But what is the hat? Well, "if it doesn't make sense it's used to attract females" is a saying in biology for a reason. Euclydean girls are seemingly attracted to males who have long and muscular hats. Besides, Bill himself says outright that he has a "seduction hat" and it's just a comically large cylinder.
So Euclydeans are sexually dimorphic species: the males are characterized by having a large growth in a shape of a cylinder hat on top of their head which females lack.
2. Growth and development
Baby Euclydeans are all soft and squishy, but they will harden as they grow. The shell gets more triangular as it hardens. The babies probably have very soft skin on their limbs too and that's why their parents give them shoes to wear to protect their little feet.
Interestingly, Euclydean eyes grow with them which is a rarity among Earth animals.
Also, I am aware that Bill said that he's a preteen, but he's lying. He has adult proportions and a fully developed hat. Hat develops as the male matures, so preteens wouldn't have it. Bill is an adult with emotional maturity of a preteen and he's using that as an excuse for his behavior. He sucks.
Also they aren't born without limbs, I screwed that up, the limbs are inside the shell, that's what I wanted to say, but I'm not English.
One very interesting thing that I noticed is that Bill's juvenile form has two rows of bricks, but his adult form has three. This means that he adds segments as he grows and there's only one way for that to occur - MOLTING!
Like all animals with exoskeleton, Euclydeans molt. Molting is a process of replacing the old, small exoskeleton with a new larger one as the animal grows. Some animals, like millipedes, add extra segments during molting process until they reach adult size. This is the case with Euclydeans.
This is confirmed to me by that little bit about Fiddleford seeing Bill remove his exoskeleton to feed. Removing the exoskeleton to eat would be the worst adaptation ever, not only because removing the exoskeleton takes a lot of time, but also because the animal would be completely unprotected during a very vulnerable time such as feeding. So what I think happened was that Bill was changing his exoskeleton to look all shiny when he comes out of the portal and, since molting is a very energy demanding process, he wanted a snack afterwards. And Fiddleford barged at the worst moment.
The exoskeleton of Euclideans contains their pigments, so they need to wait for it to fully harden until they gain color and the skin becomes invisible under it again. They are soft and vulnerable in this stage. And, considering how Alex Hirsch draws Bill in human form, I headcanon that Bill is a bit chubby, which you can see here XD
But, I know what my freaky fanfic authors need to know: Could Euclydeans and humans have sex?
Well, since Euclydeans are as intelligent or even more intelligent than humans, you can discuss consent. And with that, have fun. There are definitely ways Ford could have fucked that triangle.
@unoriginal-starwalker thank you for your support with this. My degree is burning in hell together with me after being used to write this.
#seriously this is too much for my degree to handle#but yeah being a biologist means that i can do this#speculative biology#should i tag this as nsfw?#like to me it isn't but what do i know#gravity falls#also furthering the agenda that bill's mom was blue and his dad was red#bill cipher#baby bill cipher#half of the reason why i made this was so that i could draw baby bill#he's so cute#it's healing#fiddleford mcgucket#i have no idea how he got his place here#ford was the only human who fiddled that triangle#fanart#biology
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we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.
"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."
i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.
you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"
i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.
what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.
i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.
"don't make a big deal about this," you said.
this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.
"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.
you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."
the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.
afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."
#spilled ink#writeblr#i'm trying to write about this really specific and wierd new experience#that i think is specific to the internet generation#where people you trust can just... say whatever??? and while most people are trustworthy#sometimes they'll just like... put ur shit out there????#and the thing is that sometimes it's GOOD - i want you to tell ppl if ur partner is being cruel!!!!!#i want u to be like ''hey is it normal if xyz happens'' ... but stuff like ''she's afraid of the dark''#PARTICULARLY when it's CLEARLY making fun of me....#what is the point of that.#this is huge and complicated and happens outside of romantic relationships too btw#like someone u thought of as a friend will be like . oh did u know she's scared of heights and it's like.#girl why are u fuckin doing that tho?#it's not a SECRET i just ...???????????????????????#and i think that gross feeling of like -- ''i can't REALLY be upset bc there's not a TRUE RULE about this....''#it's just not something talked about. bc it's so specific and yet so complex#bc how could i say like '' this is a violation of trust'' when it... technically I GUESS isn't????????????#idk maybe im just like super sensitive but please tell me in the comments/tags/etc if this is#something u have experienced (a trusted person like spreading ur shit) and if u were cool with it
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It's all in the name of peace and love!!
#trigun#my art#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#trigun maximum#vashwood#I don't know what to do#I draw Vash all the time but to me he always looks different#Like my vision of him isn't consistent idk
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i feel like people are sleeping on the occam's razor situation of how buckwild it is to outright accuse a guy of being a clone of your friend even if you DO have a lot of circumstantial evidence. there's other options is what im saying. they could just be like. a guy. that's a sensible deduction. you should explore that deduction. ignore my shirt that reads I <3 RED HERRINGS.
i still think odile has the correct theory on lock but she's smart enough to know it needs like... a real smoking gun to be able to bring it up without sounding insane.
anyway. (mirabelle voice) i know its rude to speculate but has anyone else noticed the grieving? they seem to be grieving. does anyone have any thoughts on the grieving? i have some thoughts on the grieving.
#[isabeau voice] am i insane or does sometimes loop talk like they might have killed their whole family. is that just me? just checking.#nille design highly inspired by @kiwibrain's since its the one that imprinted in my mind. liberties taken since i didnt look @ reference#anyway i have a lot more thoughts on this? i guess ill hide them in the tags...? scroll down i suppose.#isat#in stars and time#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat act 6 spoilers#isat loop#isat siffrin#isat bonnie#isat nille#isat fanart#in stars and time fanart#doodlebyte#----------------------------------------------------------------------#anyway the extra thoughts. are literally just my general thoughts on postcanon. (and thus are the context for all of my postcanon doodles!)#which is i think nille joins the party before loop reappears for a start (either from a period of nonexistence or just wandering around)#and that like. i think the party should be able to integrate loop as a completely new person. because they are! the secrecy isn't great but#They and Siffrin shuffle into different ecological niches in the party (eg. i think sif is more squeamish after it all but loop isnt)#and while it's not *exactly* what Loop wanted they get that beggars can't be choosers. and its pretty good#(i am glossing over how i think loop's reappearence drags both them and siffrin into a massive behavioural backslide and is likely a bit#distressing to watch go down. cycle of argument -> lovebombing -> normalcy -> repeat. etc etc. but since they are no longer literally#stewing in the worst pressure cooker of all time they do resolve it via productive conversation on their own time. its fine)#the party well-meaningly tries to deduce things from loop's vagueries and are able to pin down the DEAD FAMILY vibe pretty quickly.#but eventually the question of their prior identity falls by the wayside because well! they're just their friend loop! (also change belief)#as for how The Truth Come Out... this is what i mean by The Isabeau Torment Nexus(tm). which is that i think... isiloop should almost occur#BEFORE isabeau knows who loop is. he's just genuinely charmed by them eventually and tries to close the open end of the polycule#which FREAKS LOOP THE FUCK OUT because thats just too genuinely sick and wrong. and obviously w emotions high its not a great confrontation#ANYWAY told u i had more thoughts. if i were normal itd be a text post but.
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do u think physical build is an important part of being security? im 5'5 and think i look very timid, but ive seen some entry level security job listings around me that ive been interested in.
I've only been private security for around five years, so I'm still relatively green compared to my colleagues, but I personally am about 5'3" and I've been doing great!
And again, I'm not incredibly experienced, but if I were to make a hire, I'd be prioritizing a number of things before considering height.
Physically you need to be capable of doing your duties without pain- so if you have chronic pain, foot patrol may not be your bag, but CCTV monitoring might work. If you can't drive, being a site manager may not work, but working door duty somewhere local might be.
Physical presence- in regards to 'looking timid'- is something that you can work on if you want to, but sometimes an unassuming appearance is your advantage.
A "problem demographic" (using HEAVY quotations there) for a lot of places like malls and downtown areas is adult women with trauma, addiction, and mental health issues- they're seen by a lot of clients as "crazy ladies" and treated less like people by the general public, and a good number have very good reason not to trust men ESPECIALLY in uniform, but are more often than not perfectly easy to get along with if you're polite, respectful, and don't come off as a threat or authority figure. Being able to offer menstrual products and having resources around the area you can recommend is good, too.
And if I HAVE to move people out from behind buildings and such, saying "fuck off asshole" like folks imagine is NOT as effective as "Hey, sorry, this area is restricted, but here are some other places that might be okay- I need to do another check in about an hour, so heads up, and the church up the street is doing hot chocolate right now".
Really, if you want to do well in security- at least basic work- I'd say you want to focus on the following:
Wear your uniform and keep it tidy
Show up prepared and on time
Be able to approach strangers and talk to them
Keep a positive, non-agressive attitude, and be willing to give people the benefit of the doubt
Learn deescalation techniques to diffuse conflict
Have a strong handle on your personal emotions and opinions
Kerp calm and rational in an emergency
Learn basic first aid and get certified if you can, it's not technically necessary but I've used that more than I'd like to admit
Keep a strong moral compass
Really, I'd say it boils down to keeping to your sense of ethics, showing up on time, and knowing how to follow orders with nuanced interpretation.
Beyond that, you're golden
#Teablart#I've been told repeatedly that what makes me stand out#To both employers and the public#Is that I'm friendly positive non-judgmental and timely#Those seem to be what everyone wants#On top of the basic job work of course#Just be determined to like people#I've met a lot of asshole guards who say they hate people and I refuse to be one of them#If you hate people at least fake it#It's not their fault#We're all just animals my guy we do what we can#The vast majority of people aren't malicious they're just doing what they know#And if all they know is being a dick then that's kind of sad isn't it
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Hi it's just to let you know that the official romanization of Revaan's name is Raverne ! Also they have romanized Baul's name to Baur !
Twst coming back at us again with the least expected romanization! thank you everybody (oh god my inbox) (no it's great, I literally asked for this and the reactions have been INCREDIBLE, thank you all!)
I do like Raverne though, I think it's got a nice fancy sound to it! (I had kinda suspected it was going to be an R instead of an L, so the fact that it's SO close to Laverne except for that is hilarious to me personally.) and Dragoneye Duke is honestly probably the best translation for his title, I wasn't envying the localizers that one. :') Baur instead of Baul I was NOT expecting, but in retrospect I think his name's supposed to be a reference to the Bauru crocodile, so that actually makes way more sense!
someone else also said Meleanor has become Maleanor, which is the REALLY weird one to me, because I was so surprised it was written as Mel instead of Mal in the first place?! oh god no I can't decide which one I like better. 😭 (I wonder if they might change it to Mal...they have made romanization changes before) (like I remember House of Distraction being corrected to House of Destruction in Playful Land) (I did check and she's still Mel for now, but I dunno, they might Mal her up and some point and save me from having to make a decision about which one to use) (HECK I CAN'T DECIDE)
uhhhh thank you for letting me ramble about anime names, let's just say MONOGRAMMED SWEATERS FOR EVERYONE
#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 4 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 4 spoilers#mel is so cute but mal fits with the rest of the draconias better#eng version no you were supposed to save me not make things MORE confusing#anyway raverne huh#that uh. that sure feels like it's supposed to evoke raven doesn't it.#what does it mean WHAT DOES IT MEAN#hold on i'm going to flail around embarrassingly about anime character theories now#(okay first a disclaimer: i do think we need to sit down as a fandom at some point)#(and have a discussion about exactly what is actual canon versus meta speculation versus jokes)#(because i think there has been. some confusion. over that re:crowley and raverne specifically)#(but i do feel justified in being like THEY ARE PROBABLY CONNECTED SOMEHOW RIGHT?! right now)#like i really don't think it's as simple as crowley being raverne but with memory loss or something#(and if they pull that on us i'm going to need an EXTREMELY good explanation to go with it to justify that)#they've gone out of their way several times now to make a point about them acting and sounding different and it feels very intentional to m#(and once again: i super 100% absolutely do not believe that lilia wouldn't recognize him with the top half of his face covered)#i just think the contradictions are a lot stronger than the connections right now but there ARE some connections and i'm 👀ing at them#to be fair the connections are mostly meta like crowley being diablo/raverne being evocative of raven#also the general 'raverne mysteriously disappeared and apparently had distinctive eyes' thing#versus 'crowley's past is unknown and he never shows his eyes'#(i will argue that crowley DOES seem to have some kind of canon connection to briar valley)#(since he is clearly some sort of fae and the masks are a briar valley thing)#and that is kinda it right now isn't it#okay hold on i had to delete some tags because i used too many (thanks tumblr for letting me know and not just vanishing them OH WAIT)#so tl;dr: i'm in the 'crowley is connected to raverne somehow but it's more complicated than just him being in disguise' camp personally#but that will probably change as we get more info and also don't take this as an anti-speculation thing because i love theories HOORAY
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("Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this." -- paraphrased from The Beatrice Letters, Lemony Snicket)
#svsss#bingqiu#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#lbh#sqq#i've been working through the series of unfortunate events and somehow that series has paired really nicely with svsss#the themes of cycling violence and what's justified and what isn't and what can possibly be done differently#and how trying to bring love and honour into the midst of it really changes nothing but also changes everything#it's just *chef's kiss*#i don't know how i can quite do my thoughts justice but i've spent the past few weeks quietly going between the two series (and mdzs and tg#as well if we're being honest they all hit similar questions and themes) and just reveling in the pain and ambiguity of it#everything is interconnected and it means you can never know what trauma and pain and necessity has shaped a person#each story goes too far back to ever ever EVER possibly see the full extent of it#at that level even communication itself is nearly impossible.#and because of that it's almost impossible to change anything. beat yourself apart and the outcome is the same#and yet ATTEMPTING to change things ATTEMPTING to do the kind thing the honourable thing is absolutely critical#because while you can change nothing you also have the capacity to change EVERYTHING#aaaaaaah i don't even know what i'm saying#but i read the beatrice letters today and the love letter just. killed me.#(obviously i cherrypicked some lines because it's three pages long but those ones felt right)#''i love you like a corpse loves a vulture's beak'' i just. can't get over that line.#to be completely changed. altered. destroyed. redeemed. purified. desecrated. reduced to nothing yet entirely necessary for another's life.#what a FUCKING line#anyway i was either going to blow up from thinking about it or else i had to exorcise it via art from an entirely different series#i've already done svsss and discworld why not throw a series of unfortunate events into the mix#i'll be honest folks i did not expect svsss to be the mxtx series that would fuck me up the most about the main ship#bingqiu is something else. i don't even know how to begin to approach my feelings on it. impossibility and necessity all at once#bizarre#my art
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you ask yuuta if he wants a bite of your food and when he says yes you offer your plate to him, but he’s just sat there looking at you with his dumb big bambi boy eyes and his mouth slightly open and he will not look away or blink or close his mouth until you lift your fork to his lips to feed him and then he grins like shit’s sweet and hums about how good the food is like nothing happened like he’s not ridiculously attractive. gonna chew on steel
#he consistently does shit like this is like he's not stupidly attractive and its because he does not know. he does not know that he's hot#the yuuta/yuuji divide is that they’re both bad asl and neither know it but yuuji is Not innocent and yuuta is just naive [at first]#which is me saying yuuji is kind but yuuta is just Nice once again#insane i need to bash his head against a table. and kiss him i guess whatever#also who expects to be fed when you offer them food: toge but he KNOWS he's being annoying and whines if u dont feed him#gojo/yuuji/choso are the opposite#gojo asks if u want some of his food and then won't let u have any unless u let him feed it to you. nd if u want to avoid a scene u have to#he just babies people :((///// he does this to everyone . will cry#yuuji also does it reflexively like hes like 'oh! this is good you should try it!' and before u can even agree he's got his spoon#in your mouth and smiling like 😇 its good right!🥰......angel boy#choso...do i need to say it isn't there canonical evidence for this#oh also u offer food to toji and he just kinda tilts his head like oh what ur not gonna feed me? like no. stinky. feed YOURSELF!#yuuta okkotsu.................... when i get my hands on this boy....#💌
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Do I look like him?
had a lot of people ask me to make a tiktok for it and i swear i tried but,,, making tiktoks just isn't working for me rn so we're getting still images until i can get my brain to cooperate. anyways!! i am obsessed with chromokopia and when i heard Like Him i ascended into heaven and also cried. and it very much reminded me of LoF
#friendly reminder that peter doesn't know what richard looks like#1) because his parents died before they learned peter also needed glasses#and 2) because he would cry when he saw pictures of them as a kid and they never got around to putting them back up#also another thing: peter's universe is 7 years ahead of theirs#richard parker died when he was 36 (they had peter fairly late)#dick is currently 29#and since richard had peter when he was 34 dick isn't far off from the age he was when richard had peter in the first place#so peter is essentially seeing his dad at almost the age when peter last saw him#but this time he can see him clearly#erinwantstowrite#ao3#ao3 fanfic#peter parker#leap of faith ao3#leap of faith catch me if you can#leap of faith#dick grayson#richard parker#this was essentially “yeah to everyone else peter looks like dick”#but to peter it's “do i look like you? the other you too?”#and to dick it's “do i look like my counterpart? what was his life like?”#peter has his mother's tooth gap#a tiny piece of her in this drawing#chromokopia#peter parker in gotham#like him#tylerthecreator
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hope you feel better soon!
I am riddled with ailments, but I stay silly!
#ask#non mdzs#My health journey has been: Hernia -> acid reflux -> Vocal pain due to aforementioned reflux -> chest infection.#I'm terrified to know what's about to hit me next. Please let it be something kind. PLEASE.#The consequence of living with linguists is that you'll wake up with a wacked up voice -#suddenly you're sitting you down in front of a program called something like Praat having your shimmer and jitter levels calibrated.#They gave me a GRBAS of 33012. I have a fun thing called a pitch break where a whole octave just does not exist.#My vocal pain was bad enough I ended up seeing a speech pathologist and that whole experience was super neat!#I learnt a lot about voice - to be honest I might make a little comic on it after some more research. Fascinating stuff.#For example; your mental perception of our voice modulates the muscles of the vocal folds and larynx.#meaning that when you do have changes (inflammation = more mass = lower frequency)#your brain automatically attempts to correct it to what it 'should sound like'. Leading to a lot more vocal strain and damage!#And it gets really interesting for trans voice care as well - because the mental perception of one's voice isn't based on an existing sampl#So a good chunk of trans voice training is also done with the idea of finding one's voice and retraining the brain to accept it. Neat!#Parkinsonial Voice also has this perception to musculature link! The perception is that they are talking at a loud/normal volume#but the actual voice is quite breathy and weak. So vocal training works on practicing putting more effort into the voice#and retraining the brain to accept the 'loud' voice as 'normal'.#Isn't the human body fascinating?#Anyhow; Now I have vocal exercises and strategies to reduce strain and promote healing.#Which is a lot better than my previous strategy of yelling AAAH in my car until my 'voice smoothed out'.#You can imagine the horror on the speech path's face. I am an informed creature now.#I'm my own little lab rat now. I love learning and researching. Welcome to my tag lab. Class is dismissed.#I'll be back later with a few more answered asks </3 despite everything I'm still going to work and I need the extra sleep.#Thank you for the well wishes! And if you read all of that info dump; thank you for that as well!
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#I don't know what possesed me but I put so much effort into this one it's crazy ajhdjs#the original meme isn't even that funny idk what happened#i even did lineart which i never do#anyway#ANOTHER ONE THANK U#invader zim#iz#zadr#zim#dib membrane#iz fanart#izmeme#zade#invasor zim#dib membrana#i don't have a consistent art style either#hagdhsh#but I hope you guys like it anyway
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One thing I have seen - even from other trans people! - is this specific implication that while it's inevitable that trans men pass, but trans women are essentially doomed if they want to pass.
I could talk for days about the intricacies of passing for trans people in general. I could talk for hours about why some trans people want to pass, and that it shouldn't be forced. I could talk about the intricacies for trans men and others when it comes to passing because the dynamics don't play out the way it does for cis men a lot of times. But what gets me is the idea that trans women could never pass, that those who do are essentially anomalies is... nasty. It's got nasty implications, and it's feels even nastier when trans people do it.
Trans women, trans men, trans people of all types shouldn't be required, pressured, or forced to pass. That is true. But to say that passing is nigh impossible for an entire subsect of trans people will never not read as evil.
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#mtf#nonbinary#transphobia tw#i keep seeing this from other trans people and it's horrifying#you know what you're implying right.#because there is a DIFFERENCE between 'it can be harder for some people to pass' and 'these trans people CAN'T pass'#it's harder for some people to pass! sometimes it's by choice and sometimes it isn't! acknowledging that is crucial#what isn't crucial is to take that and then go 'well none of you pass'#and this is always framed like... trans men and trans women are on diametrically opposed sides#and the argument then reads to me like: see the TRANS MAN gets to pass but you CAN'T. you LITERALLY can't. passing is IMPOSSIBLE for you#how is that anything BUT transphobia. and why is it normalized.#you can critique passing without doing this! you can analyze the dynamics of passing without doing this! i do it many times!#passing HAS impacted me in very nuanced ways and it's COMPLICATED. i of all people get that#i specifically talk about how gross it sounds for trans women because i think y'all are more OPENLY viciously hostile towards them#though that isn't to say that that vitriol is reserved only for one group of trans people
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i wrote an interactive poem for my girlfriend in 3 parts. she said you need to read it.
go here: take only the final quiz or take all 3. i don't mind. it's sad, though. this is a poem about choice. about fate and mental illness and how love fits inside of all of it. this is a poem about a long dark hallway. mostly this is a poem about mango sushi rolls.
good luck. i love you. despite it all, i'm hopeful.
#uqiz#she said i need to put it up here lmafo#something something feel free to send me 5 dollars towards my next sushi roll run#poetry#experimental poetry#there's no specific like warning on this except that im not doing well n therefore it LEAKS into my writing lol#the realllll shit as an author is like ohhhh fuck i write so much better when im mentally unwell lol#:( why cant i be sane AND rational. why does my creativity gotta stem from suffering.#(bc when im not suffering im outside saying YIPPEE and kicking my heels lol)#IF YOU SAW THIS BEFORE I CLICKED THE RIGHT LINK NO YOU DIDNT#hey btw if you're experiencing an error idk what's up with that bc it still loads on my end.#i'll look into solutions but sorry :(#hi friends: i have no idea why sometimes the links break for random people.#it might be a chrome/firefox/etc thing but i will say that the links still work on my end AND i still have people taking each quiz.#so i know it works .... i have no idea what the exact solution is - maybe reload it if urs isn't working?#sorry im not good at coding :(
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I hate the sewers . jpg
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#larian studios#astarion#astarion ancunin#halsin#bg3 halsin#comic#comics#fanart#me browsing my saved clips like 'wait why did i record this one—'#cuts the scene im laughin for solid 5 mins#i feel so bad for astarion it almost looks like he isn't my fav w this treatment kcvvnxovx#'the bank money can wait - we need to pamper astarion now'#hey past me why did u try to switch places w halsin instead of- yknow- tHE GUY YOU PAIRED HIM WITH#prob was bc halsin had more hp to let him step on fire - and also forgetting the water pipe does that#ngl i still don't really understand how to do this part the proper way#like- yeah i know what to do but it's never perfect and always someone will get burned or pushed#plot twist im making better numbers here than twt w bg3 so i'm posting here first while i do a twt detox#my mental health this month is hanging there by two strings and these strings are baldurs gate 3 and hades 2#currently doing my honor run with my rebooted tav'chyon the dracomonk pls wish me luck
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AUGH I’d love to see more time looping odile if possible,,,,, how do you think she’d like; “devolve” over each of the acts as compared to Siffrin over time :O
ok im gonna be honest i did like portrait edits months ago and just never finished them. so here you go
act 3:
act 5:
#some of them are still missing... I'll edit this post if I finish them as well#isat#isat spoilers#odile loops au#day 108#isat odile#i'm too lazy to individually export them in transparent atm...#tell me if yall ever need it#edit: I FORGOT TO ANSWER THE QUESTION#I mean yeah technically the portraits work but I do have Thoughts about this#I just think that throughout the loops odile becomes more. annoyed. and irritated#Like by act 3 fighting isn't really amusing anymore#dying/getting frozen is. ah. welp#But by act 5 she's just speedrunning#Just super irritated. like die already i've got variables to test#act 3 frozen is a momentary rest; the break is nice and she knows she can get back next loop; it's fine. act 5 is ugh seriously#tired. annoyed. unamused. what a waste of time#anyways wait how long has it been since I posted#(sees date of last post) OH. um#sorry guys I've been busy job (internship) hunting#will I post more from now on? No promises <3#Thank you for sticking around nontheless... I appreciate all the stuff yall send in my inbox <3#isat au
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Thinking about marriage/women's rights on Vulcan Some may think that T'Pring not being allowed to divorce Spock was because he was going through the pon farr but if she were allowed to divorce him at all she probably would have done that a long time ago, confirmed by T'Pol when she's speaking with Koss, who isn't suffering from the pon farr. She says that he can choose another mate (without invoking a fight it seems: note the difference between a 'mate' and a 'challenger') and after he makes it clear that nothing she says will change his mind about marrying her, she finally threatens to declare a kal-if-fee. It's clear that Vulcan women cannot divorce/refuse to marry a man they've been betrothed to under any circumstances if A) He himself doesn't consent to ending their marriage or B) She doesn't have someone else waiting in the wings to be given to in his stead. Though, if the challenger she selects fails to win the fight, she'll have to marry her betrothed anyway unless (again) he decides he doesn't want her after the challenge. That seems like an incredibly unfair system, heavily biased towards men. SNW is an alternate universe in many obvious respects but most egregiously in that T'Pring has a lot of non-canonical agency over her relationship with Spock. It's interesting to me that Vulcan society has women in many positions of power and treats women as equal to men from what I've seen despite these laws. We don't really see Vulcans exhibiting a misogynistic attitude towards women in general but in TOS (perhaps because of its general writing style but it's still interesting to note) both Sarek and Spock take on patriarchal attitudes specifically regarding wives. Amanda says that 'of course' Sarek commands her because "he is a Vulcan and I am his wife." It's worthwhile in my eyes to note that she specifies 'wife' instead of attributing this attitude to women as a whole. Again, with TOS' writing style it wouldn't be out of place for her to say "he is a man and I am a woman." Spock, while in a pon farr induced irritation, states that it's "undignified for a woman to play servant to a man that isn't hers" - again implying that there's something specific about being a Wife in Vulcan society which is different from being a woman in general and demands subservience to a husband. This could perhaps stem from the extreme sense of ownership that Vulcan law has permitted men to have over women. A woman legally cannot point blank refuse marriage. There is no option which guarantees she won't have to marry her betrothed other than death. When T'Pau speaks of T'Pring she refers to her as being 'property' and Stonn, before being interrupted, states he's made 'the ancient claim' - we don't know what this is because he gets cut off but it's obvious they're both using the language of Vulcan law. Men are permitted true freedom to choose. If a woman wants to choose someone else to be with there is no option available to her other than the kal-if-fee which might result in the death of the one she wants to be with. And, if her lover fails, her husband can still just decide he wants to marry her and she'll be forced to. T'Pring gives two scenarios: One where Spock 'frees' her and one where he doesn't - it's still ultimately his decision which is clear when he ends the conversation with "Stonn, she is yours." This again isn't just because of the pon farr as T'Pol also goes through this. Koss can choose another mate and when the option is talked about there's no implication that this would result in any sort of fight (both by the casualness of its mention and by the fact that there's no formal word for it unlike the kal-if-fee.) Also, the fact that Koss does eventually grant T'Pol a divorce and it's all fine means that T'Pol isn't lawfully required to have another man waiting if her HUSBAND doesn't want her. It's ONLY required if SHE doesn't want her husband. Tradition must take precedence over individual desire UNLESS!!! You're a man. Then it's fine. Like, your parents might not be happy but legally you're golden.
#as a note do NOT read the comments on any T'Pol marriage clips on youtube they're full of 'haha women amiright' jokes about#how she's leading Trip on and being a bitch for not choosing him etc - if you become interested in female characters you learn#quickly just how much people still hate women displaying any amount of complexity/doing anything that isn't just falling into a man's arms#even if that hatred doesn't take the form of outright vitriol (aka: 'I feel so sad for Trip bc T'Pol's marrying some other guy')#Trip: T'Pol listen this arranged marriage stuff is no good - you've gotta be free! You have to do what YOU want to do!#T'Pol: -legally seen as property of her husband in the eyes of the law- ...............#<- not dunking on Trip it's just funny how easy it makes it seem - but!! He doesn't know all the facts#as evidenced by him saying T'Pol might 'call off the wedding' to her mother - T'Pol can't legally call off shit#It's also interesting how gender isn't really mentioned in any of the clips I've seen - it's very clear to me that T'Pol has no options#specifically because she's a WOMAN within her culture but that's almost like a quiet undercurrent and not focused on as a main#point of dissatisfaction - which I imagine it 1000% would be for Vulcan women when men have infinitely more freedom#Vulcan Man: I don't wanna marry this lady#Vulcan Law: Ok#Vulcan Woman: I don't wanna marry this guy#Vulcan Law: Noted. So - if you and your lover are willing to risk his life there's a chance (if he wins) that you can get out of marrying#him BUT if your husband kills your lover and still wants to marry you you DOOO have to marry him sorry you just gotta#<- this also makes it incredibly dangerous to in any way warn your legal husband that a kal-if-fee might be incoming#the element of surprise is a HUGE advantage when it comes to winning a fight to the death (which your lover can train for)#Vulcans#T'Pol#T'Pring#star trek#I don't think this is bad necessarily (as a fictional worldbuilding thing) but I wish it were explored more#It's especially interesting because it's an aspect of logical Vulcan society - it's clearly not logical but it's also clearly rooted deeply#in tradition which may mean Vulcan long ago used to have a much more extreme gender bias towards the male population#it just implies a lot that Vulcan has these old laws which are unfair towards women yet they still follow BUT women are treated as equal#citizens OUTSIDE of marriage! Maybe there was a feminist movement before? Is there another brewing? Where are the Vulcan feminists!
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