#like they'll never talk to andy

[silvershewolf247]

I watched the BTS of the excorcism and hearing Lachlan talk about how they never really got to perform with the Chucky gang just makes me pissed about season 2 and the ending all over again.

[p1utofairy]

PAC: your upcoming relationship 🎀🫧🎆

pile 1 🧸 —

ok so i immediately heard let the light in by lana del rey ft. father john misty! this is a very passionate relationship pile 1 wow. your person is very patient, attentive and willing to put you first no matter what. the dynamic will be similar to allie and noah's but minus the toxicity…there's a push and pull but just enough to keep each other engaged and entertained. i'm hearing a lot of witty playful banter, you grinning until your cheeks hurt and not being able to keep eye contact because they give you butterflies. i'm feeling some gemini influence in this pile hmmm communication will be really important between the 2 of you. i think you both are very similar when it comes to your interests and values but have a different approach to how you handle your feelings and express your emotions. you may be a bit more hesitant or resistant to sharing how you feel in hopes of keeping the peace but i feel like your person will encourage you to speak your mind instead of bottling it in. this goes for any scenerio as well, they want you to be able to step into your power and not dim your light for anyone or anything. your person could have prominent water/cancer/or 4h placements because they give nurturing vibes. i just heard "I JUST WANNA SEE YOU SHINE, CAUSE I KNOW YOU ARE A STARGIRL." you mean everything to them. even if you two were to have a disagreement, they'd probably be a bit moody at first but at the end of the day they'd want to talk it out and make up with you. (and i heard make it up to you) they'll never want you to go to bed angry at them or vice versa, this person is very mature and doesn't like to cut corners when it comes to their relationships. this person has an "all or nothing" type of mentality, when they commit themselves to you that's it. all they see you is pile 1, awww it's so sweet. you're gonna have lots of fun with this person.

pile 2 ⭐️ —

love you like a brother, treat you like a friend, respect you like a lover. OOOO pile 2 your person is very suave, they know exactly what to say and when to say it. i feel like they light up every room that they walk in & could definitely charm the pants off of anyone. it might be hard to take them serious at first or you may question if they're serious about you because they seem to be very friendly or more experienced. but i'm hearing that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover, because although this person may give player vibes they’re actually a sweetheart at the core. i can see this person having a really bright smile, they'll love to make you laugh and put you in a good mood. you will bring a good balance to them, they need stability and you're exactly that. they're very confident and extroverted but deep down they feel like no one really sees them except for you. i'm hearing infrunami by steve lacy so maybe some of you already know this person. it honestly does give a good friends to lovers vibe. i can see you two texting a lot, going on little dates and having random/deep conversations about any and everything. maybe lots of discussions about movies? i'm hearing some of you really love cinema. i think you'll definitely see this person in a different light as you get to know them, compared to your first impression of them. it’s like when andie was putting ben through all those hoops until they went to visit his family in staten island…and once she saw him in his element/who he truly was at the core she realized her feelings for him. yeahhh this is super cute pile 2, i dig it.

pile 3 🍬 —

heyyy pile 3, right off the bat i keep hearing the word CUTE. like maybe this is what people will think when they see you and your person together? you two are absolutely made for each other, i think your inner child will really come out when you're around this person. i can feel the excitement, the giddiness and anticipation you two will exude when you're in each other's presence. i heard "like a kid in a candy store" lol that's adorable. power trip by j. cole ft. miguel is playing…yeah it's very much THAT. i feel like you both will pinch yourselves thinking is this real??? your person is gonna make you feel like you're on cloud 9 hehe i see them getting you flowers, writing you cute little messages on sticky notes and gifting you thoughtful things that you may have mentioned in passing but didn't expect them to remember. i feel like you (and maybe even your person) have been waiting/yearning for a connection like this for very a long time, i get an almost lonely energy. like you've been single for a long time and now you feel whole/complete. the intimacy between you two >>> not even just sexually but intellectually and emotionally! you're gonna feel so safe and comfortable with them. your person is very sentimental and they will never take a moment shared with you for granted. i see polaroid/photobooth pics of you 2 being all close and cutesy :) this person might be a little lowkey/reserved in nature but you definitely bring them out of their shell. the scene where jenna says “arrivederci” and is so giddy when matty responds back with “au revoir” is coming to mind. AH y'all are gonna be so goneeeeee pile 3 i love it for you.

[coff-in]

Can I request a dynamic where the reader is the youngest Graves sibling (like a year younger than Ashley) and is objectively the most "normal" of the siblings (before Ashley and Andrew kind of ruin it)?

She's still clingy with her big brother and sister, but she's also happy to make friends outside of them and actively cares about them a lot. The thing is that Andrew forbids her from dating and Ashley scares off a lot of her friends and when quarantine rolls around she's stuck with two older siblings who are obsessed with her and she's not too sure what to do about it, because her siblings really are all she has left now.

Bonus details, I think it would be fun if her relationship with Andrew is bordering on romantic/he has romantic feelings he doesn't admit to but shows (sleeping in the same bed, holding hands) and he dotes on her a lot as the youngest. However, this strains her relationship with Ashley, who is used to having Andrew to herself before the youngest sister was born, but also loves reader (platonically, maybe transitioning to romantically) because she's never done anything but love Ashley unconditionally.

So it's a complicated thing where Ashley's possessive of both but also scared they'll get together and abandon her, Andrew is extra possessive and protective of reader but denies it to hell (as he does), and reader is slowly realizing some things about her siblings that she really should've realized much, much earlier...

notes from coff-in: GRRRR IT'S LIKE YOU LIVE IN MY MIND!!!! oh to have two possessive and obsessive older siblings who love you way more than a normal sibling should, not like i'm complaining, hahaha! i'm sorry these asks are taking so long... i just wanna hang on to all your wonderful asks and daydreaming about them indulgently!! even so, i hope this was to your liking and thank you so much for requesting!!

[fem] reader-insert, [reader] is 1 year younger than ashley, talks/mention of incest, brief NSFW

I love you more than I should...

Andrew and Ashley did not know why their mother thought she should have a second child. Maybe this was an accidental pregnancy.

When [reader] was old enough to walk and talk, Mrs. Graves delegated the responsibility of raising her to Andy, who was around maybe four or five years old at the time. He tried his best to keep them both happy and satisfied, but it was obvious to the keen few that he paid extra attention to his baby sister. Leyley wasn’t used to not having Andy’s full attention on her and expressed her hatred of the new status quo by picking on her little sister.

When [reader] would try to make amends with Leyley for whatever crime she committed, it shocked Leyley. She remembers when she was playing in the forest one day, picking on the bugs in the dirt, and having her little sister [reader] walk up clumsily to her with dug-up flowers in her hand.

“I’m sorry I made you upset, Leyley. Please don’t be mad.” Leyley picked on her less after that and a heated argument with Andy. In fact she tried to hang out with [reader] more often and tried her best to be nicer to her sister. She was someone besides Andy that she could call a friend. It wasn’t uncommon to catch [reader] following her older siblings like a lost puppy, eating lunch and studying with Andy or drawing and playing around with Leyley.

The other kids found it strange how [reader] would willingly hang out with Leyley. She was so normal like Andy was. She was sociable and had friends that she hung out with from time to time… until Leyley drew most of them away. The only ones that stuck around were Julia and Nina. Maybe [reader] knew that they were just using her to get closer to Andy or maybe she believed that they genuinely wanted to be her friends.

Once Nina died [reader] stopped putting herself out as much. She clung much closer to her big siblings and they were happy to dote and comfort her. Leyley made it so that [reader] promised with the blood pact she would never love anyone else but her and their bother.

As they got older, in middle and high school [reader] started to come out of her shell again. She tried to make some new friends but Ashley, again, did her hardest to scare most of them off. 

“What do you need other friends for?” She’d ask [reader] when they see each other during the day, “You have me and Andy! You don’t need anyone else!”

It’s not like Andrew was any better himself. His possessiveness was less visible to others but it was still there. “Ashley’s right, sis. You don’t need to worry about making friends right now.” (God, to be the object of affection between these two <3)

He didn’t like the idea of [reader] dating. He knew it was wrong for him to think of his sister like this, but he didn’t want to share her with anyone else. He’d never admit that he got off on the idea of being her first; her first kiss, her first boyfriend… To avoid the jealousy he knew he’d feel if [reader] dated he simply told her that she wasn’t allowed to do so. Any arguments that [reader] had about him or Ashley dating (mostly about him dating Julia) were casually swept aside with the excuse that he’s older than her.

Ashley doesn’t like Andrew dating Julia. He can’t leave her! Does Julia really think that she’s better because Andrew can fuck her and not Ashley or [reader]?! While Ashley leaves 200 violent voicemails for Julia, [reader] calls Andrew a lot during his time in college to ask if he could come home.

“I miss you.” [reader] would say in that low, pouty voice that’ll tug on Andrew’s heart and make his cheeks red. “Could you come back this weekend to visit?”

And he’d say “Of course.” because he could never deny his little sisters.

Once they’re stuck in quarantine, Andrew and Ashley start showing (or at least then [reader] starts noticing) their more possessive and… weirder nature.

They’re always with [reader] except for when [reader] has to use the restroom. Ashley’s making [reader] do some chore with her or Andrew’s subtly holding [reader] close to him when he’s smoking on the balcony. Ashley would make her teasingly suggestive comments about [reader] and Andrew would immediately shut them down while avoiding looking at [reader] because he does think that they have a merit to them.

Andrew sneaks into [reader]’s bed when the nightmares come and cuddles up to his baby sister. He holds her close in his arms and rests his face on top of her head or in the crook of her neck or on her chest with her chip over his head. He relishes in her warmth and takes deep inhales of her scent to comfort himself. 

Whenever [reader] does chores, he pats her on her head and says that she did a good job and that he’s proud. [reader] insists he praises Ashley too and it makes her heart pound a little faster and harder. 

Skip over to Episode 1 when they break into the cultist apartment, Andrew tries to avoid having [reader] see what’s up. [reader] is reasonably freaked out and upset about having to dismember and EAT a dead guy until Ashley proposes that she’d just starve to death. Andrew argues with Ashley about letting their baby sister starve and would probably insist with Ashley that [reader] should eat the dead cultist.

Ah, this is going to be very lazy of me but I’m going to skip over to the Burial vision scene. In the vision, the siblings see themselves (all three of them) post-coitus, naked and marked up by each other. (Very self-indulgent but [reader] would be placed in the middle of them)

Andrew’s an embarrassed mess because holy shit, holy shit, holy shit! 

He fucks his sisters. He fucks his baby sister, [reader]. He’s as elated as he is scared… she’s not like that. She wouldn’t fuck him. She wouldn’t fuck her older siblings and she wouldn’t want them as much as he wants her… would she?

Ashley’s never really considered [reader] in a romantic light like that, but she doesn’t mind it at all. Having [reader] close to her and Andrew like that brings a warm comfort to her.

With the way the trinket works, [reader] probably wouldn’t be able to see the vision since she can’t touch it when Andrew and Ashley are holding it in their hands. She’d be sleeping on the couch, waking up when she heard Andrew and Ashley yelling about the argument.

I wanna write smut about them having a hot incestuous threesome so badly but I’m losing steam right now. They all confess their feelings about each other and kiss tho. By the time Episode 2 ends [reader] has been sort of worn down by Andrew and Ashley’s weird feelings that she’s like “Yeah I’d fuck my siblings because I love them!”

----

coff-in

[shiberamune]

some personal breakfast club hcs because im feeling sad and this movie is my comfort rn :) <3

-john pierced his ears himself, it is miraculous how they arent infected

-claire secretly likes weird-ish stuff like allison, she wants a pet leopard gecko and she likes snakes too

-they all let each other bunk at each other's houses if they need to, like brian will let john stay at his house if his dad's being a prick, or andrew lets allison spend the night if she just wants to get out of her house

-my personal hc of their lives afterwards? they all live together and help each other get over the familial trauma/problems they experienced

-brian is a pokemon fan. i know pokemon didnt exist yet in the 80s but i know he would be one. and he always picks grass starters

-allison steals stuff for the others 24/7. claire wants a necklace? it's in alli's purse. john sees a cool switchblade he wants? alli's in the process of shoving it in her shoe

-andrew one time wore a dress from claire's closet to see what it would be like and john caught him. john, of course, never shuts up abt it

-andrew is the mom friend. i just feel this in my bones.

-and john is the most protective. he will find someone's house if they pick on allison or brian. only he can do that

-they all played spin the bottle one time, and this led to andrew and john having to kiss

-they liked it. they never told the others.

-brian will help the others study. he saved john's ass from flunking school as a whole

-they're all very physical with each other. always giving each other hugs or little affectionate touches. john and allison are weird about it at first, so the others take their time with them

-andrew has a guy purse

-since the movies take place in the same universe/school, i like to believe brian and cameron from ferris bueller's day off are friends

-same for ferris and andrew, or claire and sloane

-allison likes to blurt out weird/grim/niche facts she somehow knows from time to time and the others are just like "neat, thanks queen"

-john likes system of a down. again, not from the 80s, but im projecting here

-every friend group needs 1 dr pepper obsessed friend, and that is allison

-claire somehow convinced john to let her do makeup on him. he said he'd only do it if she bought him beer or cigarettes after

-john and andy are brian's wingmen. if he thinks a girl is cute, john and andrew are already plotting how they'll get brian to talk to her

anyway, that was a lot sorry 💖 idrc if not a lot of people see these, this was mostly just to make me feel better. but also i like providing for this somewhat small fandom :)

[m00npill]

[Transcript] Fallen Angels

FALL OUT BOY'S ULTRA-AMBITIOUS NEW ALBUM WILL MAKE THEM ONE OF THE WORLD'S BIGGEST BANDS. SO HOW COME PETE WENTZ IS STILL SO DEPRESSED?

source: x the other page missing ;-;

2007 Kerrang! No.1142

PETE WENTZ is an hour late.

Because of this the first thing you learn about Fall Out Boy is that nothing happens without him. His three other bandmates - singer and guitarist Patrick Stump, guitarist Joe Trohman and drummer Andy Hurley - sit waiting. They're in a conference room on the first floor of the Marriott Hotel in Lowell, Massachusetts, a pretty, vanilla flavoured town 60 minutes north of Boston. The reason the group are here is because in three hours they're due to play four songs in front of 8,000 people gathered to watch the local radio station's Christmas concert. But first they're forced to wait. Because picturing Fall Out Boy without Pete Wentz is like imagining a motorway without traffic.

"See, that's not right," says Patrick Stump. Stump is wearing a small frown and an indulgent smile. It's been said that he has no ego. As you hear him now he's checking out his own entry page on Wikipedia. "No, see, they've got that wrong...

We don't have much time. Fall Out Boy landed at Roston's Logan airport at 4pm. This lunchtime they were in Chicago; by dawn they'll be in Manhattan. The band's ride pulled up in Lowell an hour ago. It's now 6:30. At 9:25, they're due onstage. Before that they need to pose for photographs and answer questions.

"Pete's in his room," someone says. Andy Hurley goes downstairs to the toilet, taking a security guard with him. Fall Out Boy have two security men: one for Pete Wentz, one for the others.

Wentz calculates that he spends 40 minutes out of every hour on the phone. He receives up to a 100 emails a day. He owns a film production company. He's a published author. He owns his own record label. He owns his own clothing line. He's modelled for Gap. He'd be modelling for us if he could be bothered to be here.

But Pete is in his room, laid low with depression. He's sat on the floor "calling random people from [his] home town [Wilmette, Illinois]", people whom he believes will "understand [him]". Problem is, when they pick up the phone he "can't think of a thing to say". All the while it's getting later and later. He feels self-conscious about how to time his entry, aware that he might be thought of as "the asshole American guy in a band". Even now, two and a half hours later, these feelings are still resident in his mind. "It's weird," he'll say. "Although I'm functioning, half of my head is in another place.

Do you see how people might look at you, see your wealth and your privilege and your opportunities, and think: you ungrateful son of a bitch?

"Of course," he says. "I think that all the time. But you asked me about depression and so I'm talking about it. It's the culture we live in."

You don't seem to mind talking about it. "The only problem I have with it is that I don't want people to read this article and go, 'lt'd be so amazing to be depressed! That'd be cool!'. I don't want to create an industry of misery."

These days, Pete Wentz has prescriptions for Xanax, Praxil, Prozac and Ativan. To compliment this, he's taking serotonin reuptake inhibitors (more anti-depressants). In the past, he's been administered anti psychotics. If Wentz were to die tomorrow his coffin would need to be fitted with a child-proof lid.

"Sorry I'm late," he says, entering the conference room, shaking hands. "I'll be your self-conscious rock star for the day." Paul Harries, Kerrang!'s photographer, tells the bassist that we don't have much time. Pointing the lens at his face he tells him it'll need to see his full repertoire of poses. The subject understands precisely what the photographer means, and as the flash lights zap before him he gives him just that. The camera loves Pete Wentz, even if at the moment Pete Wentz hates himself.

He's depressed. You'd never know.

"NOT TO beat up on the press," says Joe Trohman. "But they do tend to take one look at our band and and say, Pete Wentz is Fall Out Boy." Trohman is answering a question as to whether it grates on his nerves that the band's bass player is the one who garners most of the public attention. "Not at all, no. Pete is the public face of the band because we want him to be the public face of the band.

Would you be screwed without him?

[cowgurrrl]

Dear Arkansas Daughter

Pairing: Joel Miller x fem!reader

Summary: A truce [2.8k]

Warnings: guilt, Andie being a menace, so much yearning, Ellie has an anxiety attack, comfort, June pushing her Mary Oliver agenda once again

You don't speak to Joel all throughout the winter break. You get so busy with family events, work, and painting that you don't even notice it until a song he recommended comes on while you're working, and you reach for your phone to tell him about it. You stared at his contact for a little too long, debating your options, before you finally sighed and threw your phone on your bed. 

Sarah's home for the break. He's probably busy with the girls. The last thing he needs is to hear from you after you got out of his truck without even saying a proper goodbye. The silence feels like a staring contest or a challenge of wills to see who will break no contact first. It sucks, but thankfully, Ellie is none the wiser and even texts you Merry Christmas with a picture of her and Sarah with reindeer ears on the abnormally cold December morning. You reason this is the best-case scenario for a really shitty situation. No reason for anyone to get more involved than they absolutely have to, right?

Andie's reappearance on Texas soil is a welcome reprieve from the guilt. You pick her up from the airport once she gets back from visiting her parents in Dallas and run into her arms like she's a long-lost lover. "You're here!" You yell as you squeeze her tight.

"You're here!" She mimics. Her dark curls tickle your face, and she laughs loudly in your ear, but you don't care. Just having her within the same zip code again makes you feel like a kid. On the drive to your apartment, you sing along to a playlist she curated specifically for your time together— a perfect mix of Beyonce, ABBA, and Joni Mitchell— and talk about everything from her parents to work to Vienna weather. She takes all of five steps into your apartment before she guns for your newest canvases drying against the wall. 

"Those aren't done!" You scold but you couldn't stop her from fawning over them if you tried.

"Are you kidding? These are amazing." She says, gasping when she sees the corner of another one peeking out behind the stack. "Babe!" 

"Alright, alright, calm down. They're still in the early stages. They probably won't look anything like this when they're done." 

"You're right. I'm sure they'll be even better when they're done," she calls as you walk into your bedroom and drop her suitcase at the foot of the bed. You don't have a guest room, and there's no way you're gonna make her sleep on the couch, so you get to have a good old-fashioned sleepover again. You’re secretly really excited just to sit in bed and do nothing with her. When you walk back into the living room, she's holding an old, reworked painting with a fond smile. "Are you going to submit these for exhibition?" She asks, and you shrug as you lean against the back of the couch.

"I don't know. Maybe? They just don't feel done." 

"That's because the longer you stare at something, the more things you want to change about it." 

"It's not a bad thing to want to make sure something's perfect." 

"If you wait for perfection, you'll never make anything, and you know that." She says, cocking an eyebrow at you, and you roll your eyes at how well she knows you. "Isn't that what you tell your students?"

"Oh, God, please don't pull the teacher card on me right now. I'm supposed to be on vacation." You groan, and she laughs.

"Does it count as vacation if we have to go to the student showcase tonight?" She asks.

"Yes, it does because you're here, and I don't have to lecture a group of thirty teenagers about pointillism," you say. "And you really don't have to come. All I have to do is show up to support the kids for a couple of hours and leave. I'll be home before nine, and then we can go out and actually do something fun." 

"Is Hot Single Dad gonna be there?" She asks, waggling her eyebrows at you, and you give her a look.

"You said you'd stop calling him Hot Single Dad."

"Hot Single Dad is so fun, though," she whines. "Also, you're avoiding the question. Is he gonna be there?"

"Ellie's work is being shown, so yeah, most likely, but there will be lots of people there. I doubt we'll even see him." 

"Oh, I'll see him."

"Andrea Lynn," you scold, and she throws her hands up. "We're gonna go and be professional and not cross any lines that could get us in trouble, right?" You think you're saying it more for your own benefit than hers, but she still puts up three fingers and nods.

"Scouts honor." 

The gallery's atrium is buzzing with conversation and excited kids from all across the district. The winter sun set long ago, but the warm lighting of the space makes it feel a little less oppressive. Small trays of refreshments make their rounds as you talk with other teachers and some parents you know. You introduce Andie to each of them, mostly to sing her praises about being a professional musician in Vienna, and she chatters away with anyone about anything. You easily kill half an hour just mingling with people before the exhibition officially starts.

At the hour, someone on the school board (you don't know their name or position, and honestly, you think it's too late to pretend like you care enough to find out) stands on a makeshift stage and says something about the importance of art in academia. You doubt it's a sentiment he actually shares, considering you've never seen him at any other art-related events, but you clap politely anyway. Halfway through his spiel, you just barely catch the sound of squeaky boots coming through the door and turn to see the source without fully thinking it through. 

There, through the crowd of heads, you lock eyes with Joel. Tommy and Ellie are at his side and wave politely. Sarah must've gone home before the New Year. You think you remember him saying something about her working at a clinic in Boston? You're a little disappointed you won't get to meet her, especially after hearing such amazing things, but you can't focus on that. Joel's eyes don't move from yours, even when Ellie and Tommy turn their attention to the speaker at the front. 

His hair has gotten long since the last time you saw him, the curls defiantly sweeping around his ears after an obvious attempt to tame it, and he looks well-rested. Despite the extra length of his hair, his beard has been recently trimmed and the salt-and-pepper stubble well maintained. He's wearing a nice dark green shirt (a Christmas gift?) and a well-broken-in denim jacket. He looks good. Of course, he does. Andie notices you're not paying attention and bumps your shoulder. 

"'S that Hot Single Dad?" She whispers, and you shake your head. 

"Not here." You beg. She seems to want to question you further about it, but she doesn't. You're sure she'll buy you a drink or two to loosen up after this and spill your guts. You sit through the rest of the speech without any more hiccups before you're finally allowed to view the gallery. 

Everyone is all smiles and excited chatter when you enter the colorful room. Thrilled parents take pictures of their kids next to their work, and proud art teachers point out their student's talents to others. There's a wide array of art. Anything from photography, drawings, paintings, sculptures, and even a video of a performance projected onto the wall. You catch bits of people’s conversations and hear a lot of chatter about the artist from your school. You don’t need any more context to know who they’re talking about. You and Andie walk side-by-side in silence as you look at the different works, only talking when you come across one of your kids' works. She makes you take a picture in front of each one, and you feel a little silly, but you can't fight the pride in your chest. 

Andie has always had the unique ability to celebrate you for things you wouldn't celebrate yourself for. In reality, all you did was push them to make the art and consult them through the process, but she reminds you that they might not even have made anything if it weren't for you. It makes you feel special and seen. It makes you wish she lived closer so you could do the same for her by showing up to performances and taking pictures of her in her element so she can cherish them. It makes you forget about Hot Single Dad until Tommy rushes up to you, calling your name. 

"Mr. Miller, it's good to see you." You greet politely, but he's out of breath and looks stressed as he looks at both of you. He softens when he sees Andie and takes a deep breath to pull himself together.

"I don't believe we've met," he charms and offers his hand to Andie. "I'm Tommy, Ellie's uncle." 

"I'm Andie, the forever teacher's pet," she shakes his hand and gives you a look over her shoulder. "Honey, you didn't tell me how handsome Ellie's uncle is." She says. Tommy smirks and looks flattered, but mentioning Ellie brings him back to the moment. 

"Ellie's askin' for you." He says, and you furrow your brows and look behind him.

"Where is she? Is she okay?" 

"She got real upset bout somethin' but wouldn't say. She just said she wanted to talk to you." Fuck, you think. Did she find out? If so, how? There's no way Joel would've told her, especially tonight of all nights. Is she upset about how her art is being shown? Is she mad at you? Possibilities run through your head and twist your stomach into knots, but you don't hesitate to follow Tommy. If she says she needs you, then you need to be there. 

Andie follows closely behind as you and Tommy weave through the crowd until you come to a stairwell off the side of the gallery, away from overlapping voices and bright colors. When the door creaks open and echoes through the empty space, you see Joel and Ellie sitting on a step, tears staining her face. Andie says something about hanging back, and Tommy agrees to wait with her, but all your focus is on the crying kid in front of you. You wait until the door shuts behind you to settle onto the step under theirs and pull Ellie's hand out of her balled-up fist. Joel watches you carefully but doesn't try to stop you. 

"Hey," you say gently, like she's a scared animal. "What's goin' on? I heard you wanted to talk to me." 

"I," she tries, but her voice catches in her throat, and more tears well in her eyes. You rub your thumb across her knuckles and shush her gently. 

"You're alright. Take a breath, okay?" She does, and Joel reaches out to rub her back soothingly. A few more tears fall down Ellie's face as you wait her out. You catch Joel's eyes over her shoulder, and he gives you a grateful look. All you do is nod. 

"I'm not good enough to be here," she finally gets out. "Everyone's work is so much better than mine, and I... I think they made a mistake. I can't compete." 

"That's not true. That's what your anxiety is telling you. That's not even close to the truth." You say firmly. She shakes her head as she looks at her dad.

"We shouldn't have even come." She says, and he pulls her under his arm, kissing her temple.

"Honey, they took your art for a reason. We're not here by accident. We're here because you worked hard and made somethin' so beautiful that they had to show it." 

"He's right," you say. "Hundreds of students apply for this exhibition every year, and every year, hundreds of students get rejected. But not you. You worked and earned your spot here. How many days did you show up early to my classroom to work on it, huh?" You ask, and she wipes her eyes. She seems to calm down a little at your words but still shrugs like she’s unsure of herself. 

"I don't know."

"Ellie, you were in my room for at least a month straight working on this. Somedays, you were painting before I even had a chance to turn on the lights. You got up early and stayed late, and it shows. You made something so wonderful the district couldn't keep it a secret. Do you know how many people are talking about your yellow painting?" 

"People were talking about it?" She asks, and you nod, squeezing her hand.

"They kept saying they'd be surprised if you didn't win, and I'm not just saying that because I'm your art teacher. I'm saying that because it's true." You say. She chews at her bottom lip and stares at her shoes as she thinks. 

You knew about Ellie's anxiety long before this moment. She's spent many planning periods in your classroom venting or crying about it, and you pointed her to the correct resources. She's in therapy and on medication to help her control it, but it still rears its ugly head every once in a while. With all the teenage emotions and daily battles, you're not surprised that it does. But it does surprise you that she can't see how special she is. She works so fucking hard— sometimes too much— and she gives her all in everything she does. Of course, people are going to recognize that greatness. Of course, she deserves to be here. Of course, she's going to be amazing.

"Every time I look at it, I just see all the bad things about it." She admits, and you sigh. Of course, she treats her work the exact same way you do.

"I do the same thing," you say, and she looks at you with wide eyes like she wasn't expecting you to actually cop to it. "It doesn't matter how much time I spend on it or if I like the concept; I will find a million things wrong with a piece before I can admit that it's a semi-okay piece of work. I have a canvas sitting in my apartment right now that makes me want to throw up every time I look at it." 

"How do you get over it?" 

"I'll let you know the second I figure it out," you say, and she smiles a little now that she knows she's not alone in her internal fight. "You deserve to be here, kid. You are hard-working, creative, and smart. You are going to make so much beautiful art in your life, you won't believe it. And it's true that it won't always be the best, and you won't always love it, but the thing all great artists have, regardless of medium, isn't talent. It's resilience. If you wait for perfection, you'll never make anything, so you have to keep going and making things even when you feel like it's bad because the world needs your art. The world needs you, Ellie." You say, echoing Andie's words from earlier. She takes a deep breath, and the weight on her shoulders seems lighter. Her anxiety rolls away like a wave from the shore. It will be back again and again, but she knows people are going to grab her before she can drown. She knows she's got lighthouses. She knows she's okay. 

"Thank you," she mumbles, and you nod as you squeeze her hand. She relaxes into Joel and looks up at him. "'M sorry."

"You've got nothin' to be sorry for, baby girl. I'm on your team," he says. He looks at you and chews the inside of his cheek. "We're both on your team." It's a peace offering. An end to the challenge. An acknowledgment that you can't ignore each other forever. You take a deep breath and let your free hand squeeze his calf where Ellie can't see, letting him know you know. 

You read a poem once in college about not being afraid of joy and taking advantage of the happiness while it's there. You remember reading the words "Joy is not made to be a crumb" and feeling your chest crack open in that funny way that only art can cause. It couldn't have been longer than two hundred words, and you read it so long ago you're surprised you even remember it, but you're glad you do. You're glad Joel and Ellie came into your life. You're glad you made so many memories with him, and you hope he'll let you in enough to make more as friends. You're glad you called the parent-teacher meeting when you did. 

You decide joy is not made to be a crumb, but neither is affection. In that cold, dingy stairwell in downtown Austin, you think you could paint something about this feeling. You think you could be okay with its imperfections. You think you could even submit it. You think you could win the bet.

TAGLISR: @abbyhaslongshorts @kiwiharrykiwi @sumsworldz @myloveistoolittle @anavatazes @marantha @cosmoscoffeee @shyminnie07 @beezusvreeland @eddiemunsonsbedroom @harriedandharassed @doodlebob-mp3 @ignorethisplz2004 @buckyispunk @d1lf-loverrr @vee-bees-blog @moel-jiller @anoverwhelmingdin @casssiopeia

[cevansbrat0007]

I'm obsessed with this series. I'm such a sucker for love that's given often and shown so freely. Andy and Reader are each other's world. I feel like they're the type of (one day) elderly couple who if one passes, the other is following right behind in a few days to months.

I can't wait to one day read a little drabble about them when they're old and retired, maybe having their kids and grandkids over for christmas and their kids' POV watching Andy and Reader sway and canoodle under a mistletoe.

At Last...

Summary: True love stories never end...

Warning: the following answer contains talk of death as well as celebrations of love and life. Read at your own risk. Takes place in my ongoing Growing Pains Series. __

Thank you. It makes me so happy that you've fallen in love with Growing Pains as well as Andy and Reader's love story. Those two are so incredibly and irrevocably devoted to one another - they really are each other's entire world.

If I'm being honest, I have thought about what the end of their time on this planet would look like. And Baby Girl always outlives Andy. Not just because she's a few years younger than him, but because there is just no other way.

He could never live without her. Not even for a month, or a couple of days. So, when the time comes and life finds him on his deathbed, they make a plan.

They're both such stubborn people, you know? So damned headstrong even up until the very end. Andrew Barber doesn't want to go.

Not yet.

But while his spirit remains young, his body is old. After all, fighting your way into your nineties is no easy feat. But he's also got four children right here in this realm to take care of, and an errant wife to look after who is just as much of a brat as she's always been.

And the doctors, well, they don't understand how he's made it so long. From everything indicated on his chart, he should've left this world days ago. But somehow Andrew Barber continues to defy the odds.

That stubborn ass ogre.

But he's also in pain. Even as he's fighting, refusing to give in. However, it's not sustainable. And Reader knows that her Big Man needs to rest. She spends every day by his bedside, rarely leaving for more than a few minutes at a time. It's been a few days since she's been able to catch a glimpse of his beautiful blue eyes, every once in a while, she's treated to a gentle squeeze of her hand.

Baby Girl knows her husband better than any other person on the planet. She knows that in order to leave her behind, even for just a little bit, she has to give him a purpose. So she crawls into bed with him, bad hip and all, and tells him her plan.

It's just between them - this task that she gives him.

She tells him to go on ahead and get their home ready - their dream home. And start decorating it the way he knows she'll like. She even promises not to get mad if the color schemes aren't quite right, because she'll just fix it all when she gets there.

Simple as that.

And while he's taking care of the house, the next thing she wants him to do is find Jacob. Wherever he is. Because she expects him to be at the dinner table sharing a meal with them for her first night in their new home.

And in return for doing all of that, she'll handle everything else with BiBi, KitCat, RoRo, and A.J. and all of their precious grandbabies. She swears that she will make sure that every single little detail is taken care of, and when it's all done...

She'll come find him. And when she does, they'll share a dance in their kitchen to the tune of their favorite song - At Last by Etta James. Baby Girl goes on to assure him that it will be the first of many.

Some time later that night, her sweet Andy Bear takes her up on her offer. But not before opening his eyes one last time to see her sleeping in the chair at his bedside. Now that makes him crack a smile.

Because in the last dream he had he could've sworn he told her fine ass to get to bed. A real bed. Not a chair.

His sweet, beautiful girl never fucking listens.

Reader knows when he leaves. She later describes it to their children as feeling his lips brush her skin, right behind her ear. His favorite place to kiss her.

She and the kids keep the actual ceremony small, but then they throw a party - a celebration of Andy's life. And after that, Reader spends the next two years making sure everything is in order.

Just like she promised.

Andy comes to her in her dreams every now and again. And in those dreams he always looks like he did when they first met - her handsome man.

And when it's finally her time, Reader passes on surrounded by their babies. But she tells them not to worry, because their father has been sitting by her bedside for the last few days. She knows they can't see him...

But she swears he's right there. And he's brought along Jacob. She tells her sweet babies that she's finally ready to join the love of her life. They even share a little laugh when she tells them how their father keeps pestering her all because she owes him a dance.

And when she takes her last breath, the sweet sound of Etta James is playing softly in the background. Bianca and her siblings sit there quietly for a few minutes after her passing holding hands and reveling in the fact that they know their Mama went home.

She's finally back in the arms of the man that she loves. They have no doubt that their Mama and Daddy are finally sharing that dance. And wouldn't you know it...

Somewhere in the great beyond, they were right. Their Mama made it home at last. And she left the light on for them too. Just like she told them she would.

[columbiastapshoes]

hello twin peaks fandom. i just finished the og 2 seasons and for the later half of season 2 i put live reactions in my notes app. here are the highlights <3 (lmk if u want the full version it’s so much longer)

‼️spoiler warning‼️ ALSO if you read me saying ‘evil cooper’ i am talking about windom earle. i did not know there would be a literal evil cooper. at the end of the reactions ‘evil cooper #2’ is referring to cooper’s doppelgänger <3 also also!! the double return means it’s a new collection of notes that i wrote down in the same moment if that makes sense? i wanted to do screenshots instead of the actual text but alas i can only upload ten </3

- "psychological evaluation" he already has an autism diagnosis leave bro alone

- ok hang on. if josie dies and harry couldn't protect her. then. parallels with caroline dying and cooper couldn't protect her. Hm :3 (update! david lynch the man that you are.)

- "what is the greatest gift one human being can give to another?" and bobby and i make the same 🤨 face

- weasel. right. yes. i am following this conversation

- sksksksksk save the weasels

- sorry

- im really sorry

- this is the worst possible person to be helping rn. unfortunately he is incredibly smart.

- earle is dale if he used his autism for evil

- i certainly hate you james fwiw!!

- you guys have started over again like 30473938 times stop it

- "please come home with me" "actually you should go" GUYS

- done with y'all where are the queers

- cooper appears from a bush and goes "you never loved her anywayyyyy"

- christ this is rough where are my boys

- MY BOYS??? oh no it's you :/

- haha you're not gonna tell him right

- ohhhh dear :3

- im going to kms :3

- hello bri ish man would you like a bo'ol of wo'uh

- chess? great! sheriff to fbi agent. they kiss. they both win

- "have someone keep an eye on him" CUDDLE WIFH HIM COWARD HE CLEARLY NEEDS YOU. YOU ARE THE FIRST AND ONLY PERSON TO CALM HIM DOWN AND ALLOW HIM TO CRY INSTEAD OF YELL. WHAT THENFUCK DALE COOPER DO U REALIZE HOW MUCH HE LOVES U. sigh

- I DONT CARE ABOUT THE FUCKING WEASELS THIS IS SO FUCKING. RGH

- no way they have roblox dress to impress in twin peaks

- OH NO HE EVIL WHITTLES HES LIFERALLY RVIL COOPER

- i wanna kiss this sad sad man very desperately

- break it with a hammer ??? dumdum

- WOWEEBOB !! !!

- "not all men" ur right pete martell would never

- my boys have not been together as much and it's making me STBERE THEY ARE WITH A HOMOSEXUAL ARM AROUND THE SHOULDER

- oh there's a bomb! ok!

- HARRY HAS A GRANDPA SWEATERRRRR I LOVE HIMMM

- they touched hands they wanna make out sooooo bad

- the bomb can wait you guys are in love

- cooper so preeeeetttyyyyyy :333

- andy i love you very dearly

- i love how harry is so gentle and kind and patient with lucy and then he's like ANDY SHUT THE FUCK UP

- girls night (cooper interrogating audrey donna and shelly)

- wow thats comforting if i was told this i would burst into tears or flames

- i love it when cooper is in front of a whiteboard

- "for instance?" i KNEW thats how u would approach dirty talk u fancy motherfucker

- THEY ARE NOT MAKING EYE CONTACT IN AN IMPORTANT CONVERSATION. AUTISM.

- why is bro goth what happened

- evil cooper you need to either do normal foundation or all white WHY ARE HIS TEETH BLAAACK

- bro is NOT siouxsie 😭😭😭

- yeah no shit. is this. news. i knew this before u fbi fuckers did

- URETHRA! ☝️

- you could KISS him? okay evil cooper..

- finished my brownie. crave death

- who is bro talking to

- oh leo hi leo

- it hasn't panned to leo yet i think he's like dead and they'll reveal it in a sec

- oh nom worse than dead ow ow ow ow

- OW OW OW OW OWWWWIEEEEEE

- WHERE DID HE FIND THE TARANTULAS

- dw leo i can take them home. they are my friends

- giggling a lil. about. cooper.

- BY HEAVENS oh my god

- i'm still giggling about cooper but it has turned from "i want him" giggling to "BY HEAVENS!!" giggling

- ok sorry what's the issue i got distracted

- sorry had to rewind two more times BY HEAVENS is taking me out

- i always said this show needed a dance sequence (i never said that)

- jeez u guys suck not u lucy ur eating

- I ALWAYS SAID TWIN PEAKS NEEDED A KICKLINE AND TOP HATS (i never said that)

- closeup on harry's face pls don't i need GRAND THEFT AUTO.

- sorry pete just said grand theft auto.

- can my cats stop beefing i have a show to watch

- WHERE ARE HER DRAPE RUNNERS!!!!

- you don't fucking say things got out of hand Michael.

- most useless side plot i do not care

- CAN MY CATS STOP BEEEEFINGGG

- HOLY SHIT ITS EVIL COOPER TO ME AND EVIL COOPER LITERALLY!!!!!

- how is he not crying and screaming in a fetal position that would be my plan

- why is evil cooper #2 kinda.

- why do i lowkey want evil cooper #2

- TBIS FUCKING KID WITH THE FLASHLIGHT

- bobs camera angle looks like a ring doorbell

thank you!

[dnfnoodles]

I definitely feel like I've been way to hard on sylvee because she's literally been around for everything and never responded this way but you're right. I truly think because of the cc sphere she's in they went after her (esp her past friendship with andi and then of course Hannah) we know she's close (was?) with geenelly too who is semi-part of the british crew. There's so many factors and I think it's important to remind ourselves that from what I remember she has besides the unfollowing and dm messages about it- never openly vagued or talked about them openly like others have (correct me if I'm wrong). I really hope she talks to them and they work it out but idk if they'll go back to how they used too. I think eventually her and sapnap might since they seem, from my perspective, the closest but sap is a loyal af. Like I really wonder if him and punz are done. Rip punznap sigh 🙏

Hannah is... more difficult for me, and it makes me really sad. I always used my prime on her and was almost at 2yrs lol though I've been watching her for far longer than that 😞 i really respected how she would try so hard to be careful, nuanced, and respectful in her takes but I truly think her need to be the champion of women streamers has led to blind support in not only just this case. I do think we all agree it's incredibly needed and very admirable especially with how they're still treated in the gaming/cc atmosphere and what she has gone through and experienced first hand, I'm sure there are tons of things we don't know too! However it's also important to know respect nuance in all situations.

I think to her streaming and content will always come 1st- it's her job i get it. Guess you can't blame her but I also can stop watching her for awhile. I also think she's another disillusioned cc who thought after becoming closer with dteam they'd do all this content together and dteam just doesn't work that way they just don't care or need too, you know? Moving to a new state doesn't help and can be really rough for the first year or two and that can hurt. Hannah also clearly cares alot (I'm the same way, it's part of why i liked her) and I'm sure it got frustrating esp because fans kept asking her to do stuff with them but it's the same as jm- if you're tired of it then you need to find a way to deal with it without taking it out on them.

I guess we'll see what happens. I'm really proud of sylvee for acknowledging her part so openly.

yeah I understand and agree anon :) it really is not an easy situation. For me my own comfort is the most important so I stopped watching somw people but I will try to show them understanding and empathy and I hope they can reflect on these decisions and wish them well :)

[patronusofthepugs]

Where Jealousy Triumphs Asthma

For @roudiseshipweek for the Jealousy Prompt

Trigger Warning : Panic Attack, hyperventilating

Not entirely satisfied with this but I wanted to contribute

Rudy frowned as Andy and Ollie Pesto smushed their faces against the restaurant's window, eyes wide and nostrils flared with open mouths. Rudy thought they resembled more like rabid baboons than a pair of 13-year-old boys. Baboons with the worst sense of timing, Rudy thought, with narrowing eyes. They would decide to interrupt the rare time that Rudy was able to hang out with Louise with just the two of them.

"Are they going to be here the entire time?" he grumbled to Louise.

Louise glanced at the window and laughed, "If I chuck a hamburger at them, who do you think would catch it first?"

Rudy thought only for a moment, "Andy seems brawnier somehow? My bet is on him."

Louise winked at Rudy and slid off the stool, "Watch this." Louise grabbed her forgotten hamburger and casually opened the door "Hey, Pestos, the person who misses this hamburger is King of Wet Blankets." She shouted as she hurtled the hamburger above their heads. The twins blinked in unison before Andy launched himself at Ollie, hooking his around Ollie's shoulder to knock him down. Ollie nimbly stepped back and shot his foot out in a swift kick at Andy's shins.

Andy yelped and stumbled back. Sensing victory in the wind, Ollie jumped, catching a handful of half-eaten meat and buns.

He whooped and fist-pumped the air with his other hand, "Time for your crowning, Your Majesty. " he said, throwing his mushy hamburger prize at Andy.

Louise and Rudy watched as the twins started to wrestle amongst the hamburger carnage. Their laughter and jeers quickly turned to shrieks as a flock of seagulls descended on them, ready to feast on the royal burger.

"Are they, uh, going to be okay?" Rudy asked with some concern now as the seagulls dive-bombed the twins.

Louise grinned as she folded her arms, "Yeah, they'll be fine. They will go screaming back to their restaurant and later walkie-talkie over how they found the seagull mafia."

Rudy felt a slight pang in his chest, an uncomfortable squeezing feeling as if he couldn't breathe. Which wasn't unusual for Rudy. The air was his nemesis and every breath of air was a middle finger to Death. But this felt different. He stared intently at an odd grease spot above the coffee maker, "You and the Pestos are getting really close lately huh." He said casually, well what he thought was casual. His voice did crack in the middle there, damn.

Louise shrugged and tilted her head at him, " I mean, I guess? They've always been my neighbors ya know. And they never mind going along with my schemes."

Rudy drummed his fingers on the counter, wow he never noticed how many interesting stains the walls held. If he kept staring long enough, maybe Louise wouldn't notice how red his face was or how his voice was wavering.

This was dumb, he was being dumb. Louise could have other friends, of course, she could! And who cares if those other friends were other boys who were more fun than him and didn't wheeze every time they talked and could actually keep up with Louise. And who could probably do magic tricks better than Rudy and was funner and not socially awkward. And maybe someday Louise would rather hang out with the Pestos than Rudy. And that's fine, totally fine! Sure, Rudy would be alone but he wouldn't want to hold Louise back. What kind of friend would Rudy be if he held Louise back. Just good ole slow poke Rudy. Being alone wasn't so bad. He could do it.

Rudy's chest grew tighter and tighter, and he started to breathe faster, panicking at the feeling of not getting enough air. He couldn't see the interesting stains anymore through blurred tears. The first sensation that came back to Rudy was the cold hard plastic of his inhaler pressed against his lips, and the sound of Louise frantically saying his name.

He took a puff of his inhaler on autopilot and slowly slid off his stool, melting onto the floor in a sad Rudy puddle.

He hugged his knees to his chest and buried his face into his hands. Louise instantly went onto the floor next to him, hovering cautiously over him. "Talk to me, Rudes, what's wrong? Is it your asthma? Should I go get your dad?" She turned slightly to the door.

The rest of her family and Rudy's dad were upstairs in the apartment. Her mom was showing off her ceramic baby collection to the surprisingly avid collector of Rudy's dad.

Rudy's tugged on Louise's sleeve and he lifted his head. His eyes were watering and his face was flushed. He looked so incredibly sad that it almost made Louse want to cry. He had the look of an abandoned puppy on the way to pound, faced with the inevitable.

She never wanted to see this look on her best friend again. " Hey, hey, hey, Rudes, Roody Man, look just talk to me. How can I fix this, what's wrong?" She pleaded, her voice soft and her hands fluttering around his shoulders like anxious doves.

Rudy stared down at the floor, "Please don't leave me behind. I'm scared you're going to like the Pestos better than me and I'll be left alone." Louise wheeled back, mouth dropped open and eyes wide. She gave an angry huff and lightly smacked both hands on Rudy's cheeks, holding her hands there and glaring at him with the Louise special glare. Rudy startled at the touch, stared at her. The two stared at each other in awkward silence as Louise held his face before Rudy cleared his throat, "Um, Louise, what are you d-" "What are you right now?" "Um, What?"

"What are you, Rudy? Right in this moment, what are you being?"

Rudy furrowed his brow and thought carefully, "An idiot sandwich?"

Louise dropped her hands and folded her arms, still glaring. "Rudy, I would never abandon you! You're my best friend! The Rudymeister! I threw you a benefit! I wouldnt throw a benefit for just anyone. Why would you think that I would abandon you!"

Louise frowned, staring down at the ground in angry silence. She was hurt her best friend would think so little of her. As if she could fathom a day when Rudy wouldn't be in her life. It was unthinkable.

Rudy swallowed hard, now nervous and suddenly embarrassed at hyperventilating into a panic attack. He unfurled his legs and moved a little closer to her.

"You're right, I don't know, it's just the Pestos can do things that I can't and I thought you would prefer them to me. I don't want to hold you back."

Louise glowered at him, "Yeah, they are my friends but they are the Pestos and you're you! I don't compare you guys, that's dumb. That's like comparing me to Tina and Gene. "

Rudy laughed shakily, staring at the underneaths of the table. Sure a lot of gum under the tables. "You're right, Louise. I was just uh being silly. Won't happen again. I promise."

Louise groaned, now frustrated at herself. She wasn't good at this soothing thing, was she? She was supposed to make Rudy feel better not worse. She sighed again and steeled herself into a softer approach. Moving slowly so as not to startle him, she grabbed his hand.

"Hey, I am sorry. I don't want you to feel like you aren't enough. Because you are, you're always more than enough. I would never just abandon you. Unfortunately for you, you're stuck with me for life pal. I'm going to be there when you are Rudy the Illusionary Visionary and you're going to be there for me when I get this place the respect it deserves from this town. " Louise squeezed his hand and glanced at his from the side of her eyes.

She couldn't look at him straight throughout her mushy speech, but to her immense relief, he wasn't crying anymore. Rather a beaming smile grew across his face and he faced her fully, eyes glowing bright and shiny. "You're my best friend, Louise. I wouldn't know what I would without you." He said earnestly, squeezing her hand slightly.

Louise squeezed back briefly before dropping his hand and raising it to ruffle his hair. "Psh, you would be a tax accountant without me. Until I chop down your door with a flame thrower to save you from the IRS and boredom."

Rudy laughed, chest no longer tight although he took a puff of his inhaler just to be on the safe side. He slowly got up and helped Louise to her feet. He glanced out the window and saw that the Pestos were gone. Only piles of feathers and a few sesame seeds were left on the sidewalk.

Louise stretched and knocked her shoulder against Rudy.

" Come on, let's go down to the wharf to catch some crabs. I want to give one a knife. Let's see if we can make one King Crab."

Rudy laughed and followed Louise into the kitchen. There wasn't anywhere else in the world that he would rather be than crowning crustaceans with his best friend. However, he should make sure it was a butter knife and not a butcher knife.

[cantsomeoneelsedoit]

Ch 42: As Long as They Don't Forget

They call him Captain Puppy Eyes

Did she atone by founding the Sunflower Nursery??

Andy tells her to pour Anheuser beer on his crew's graves to find forgiveness, and Fuuko sets out alongside him. He claims that he wants to make the saloon woman suffer, but Fuuko sees another side to his motivation. And then we get:

🐎COWBOY ANDY MONTAGE🐎

We see the four seasons representing the passage of time between them. In the first one, they're both shooting at a group of normal-looking old-timey Western guys. In the second, they're walking through the desert.

In the third, there's falling leaves and an angel in the background. It looks like they've got a child fighting with them. They're fighting two guys wearing suits and masks that resemble the Union Negator hunters from Chapter 1. The angel doesn't quite match up with the statue in the chapel in Longing, either. I'm so curious about this one!!

Angel comparison:

In the fourth, Andy has buried a friend in the wintertime. There are two other people dressed like Andy and Fuuko.

I love the way the narration boxes explain Fuuko's POV here. Describing the time as eons that passed quickly, like a dream, both rich and deep but also instantaneous--- that's a lot like the effect authors want to create when writing a good flashback.

We see some crumbs about Andy's current crew, and that he's drinking a Budweiser, which came out in 1876 IRL.

Andy and Fuuko's conversation about death raises some questions about Victor. When he's being suppressed, is he "alive?" Can you be alive if you can't challenge? If you can't change?

We see how Andy's crew formed. When they met him, everyone was wearing tattered clothes and looking like they were just in a battle. I'll bet Andy helped them out and then they started following him like Fuuko.

Fuuko tells him that she believes people who have passed remain alive in our hearts and talks about how she feels her parents guiding her.

Andy knows that he won't be alone anymore and he smiles. And then all readers collectively gasp at the next page:

FIRST OF ALL, {ohrwepo%9Ksd46<2[LJS:Fqj3nq4rwe^isdfah!

I can't believe it! The realest, non-battle-related, most solemn and serious moment of major romance, and they still don't kiss!

And she's right-- It's not really the same person and he doesn't really know her as well as she knows him at this point.

The line, "As long as I don't forget, then people won't die" is impactful to this story in so many ways.

First, Juiz has to remember to find people every loop. If she forgets to how to seek out the Negators or forgets who they are, she'll waste opportunities to defeat God.

Second, what does it mean when the story seals off Victor's memories? Are those memories "dead?"

Third, Andy has to remember Fuuko so he can find her in the future.

Also, Andy/Victor serves as a "witness" to the story to remember all the people and events that have happened. If they forget, they'll be missing valuable information that can help everyone.

In one way, it's really sweet that Andy now has a philosophy that he never really has to say goodbye to people bc they live on as long as he remembers them. But in another sense, it's horrifically tragic bc he's already forgotten so much. Everyone from before April 15, 1865 is dead to him, in all senses of the word.

What was the reason she began to fade away? Was it because she told him she loved him? Because he smiled? Because they almost kissed? And what will she find at the next stop in the book?

Masterpost

[oktobersilver]

☆My Pretty Barbarella☆

john taylor x reader!!!!

SUMMARY: Your childhood friend Simon introduces you to his band, but you can't peel your eyes away from one particular bassist, only to find out he can't either.

warnings: smut, oral sex

enjoy!!

Y/N's good friend, Simon, was finally going to introduce you to his band that he'd always talk about. You were nervous about the fact you'd never met any of the members before, you hardly even knew their names, let alone how they'd treat you. But, you knew that if Simon liked them, they had to be good people. "Hey, Y/N, we're here!" Simon cheerfully announced, turning towards you from the driver's seat. "Are you really sure that they'll like me? I mean, this is your band, I wouldn't want to make a bad impression or anything" Y/N anxiously admitted, you couldn't stop worrying about making a good first impression for some reason.

Y/N and Simon walked into the studio, smiling brightly at the two men in the main room.

"Andy, Roger, this is Y/N! I've known her since primary school, we've been close ever since" Simon said, patting your back.

You smiled at the two, shaking their hands as they flashed a smile at Y/N.

"Nice to finally meet you, Y/N." Andy said, nudging at Roger to speak.

"It's very nice to meet you, Y/N, I'm glad Simon has someone close outside of the band" Roger said, clearing his throat.

Simon looked across the room as Nick & John walked out of the recording room, motioning for them to come over. Y/N looked up at the two men, instantly noticing one of them was really, really good-looking.

"John, Nick, meet Y/N! Andy & Roger already met her not too long ago"

Y/N gave the two men a bright smile, shaking their hands as well but you had to admit, John was really, well, he was gorgeous.

Y/N thought you caught him looking you up and down, but just figured it was your imagination, but what if it wasn't?

Simon and most of the guys went off to the recording room, Roger went outside for some fresh air, leaving Y/N & John in the main room.

After a minute or two, Y/N glanced at John, clearing your throat.

"So, what instrument do you play, John?" Y/N asked the man, as you leaned against the couch, slightly tilting your head in curiosity.

The tall man glanced at Y/N up and down, quickly before answering

"I play bass, but I started out playing just regular guitar at first." He said, fully turning his attention to Y/N.

"Do you play anything?" He asked politely. Y/N smiled at him, "I've always liked bass, I think it deserves more attention, and I used to play guitar in highschool, but I don't really play anymore now." Y/N answered, looking at John as you subtly bit your lower lip.

"So...what have you been up to?" Y/N asked him, crossing one leg over the other.

John quickly licked his upper lip before answering, "Nothing too much, I have been in need of something, it's been pretty tame for the past couple months". He said, walking just a bit closer.

Y/N grinned at him, crossing her arms as she looked at the man.

"And what exactly are you in need of? You're not being very specific, Mr. Taylor." You said teasingly, maybe he really had been looking at you like that, it's not like you were completely oblivious.

John leaned down close infront of you, his blonde fringe ever so slightly covering his eyes as he gazed upon Y/N.

"What do you think? I'm not stupid, I've noticed that look you've been giving me from the moment I entered the room, pretty girl." He murmured, the tone of his voice walloping throughout her chest.

"How about you show me then?" Y/N whispered, gently kissing the side of John's neck.

He peered down at her, taking her into a sharp, but dirty kiss, he couldn't help but revel in the feeling of their tongues sliding together.

A soft moan escaped from Y/N's mouth as John perched his leg between hers, trailing his hands beneath her shirt, grazing her hips.

"John.." Y/N murmured, looping her fingers through the belt loops of his trousers, tugging at it.

"Does that feel good sweetheart?" He hummed, taking her back into a deep, filthy kiss, making his way through her mouth with his tongue.

Y/N sat back on the couch, followed by a cry of pleasure, hardly breaking contact with John's mouth.

"Take this off for me, princess." He said, kissing down Y/N's neck as they both stripped of their clothes.

John trailed his hand down Y/N's waist, teasing at the start of her clit, increasing his pace.

"Please! John, please" Y/N cried out, "Please, please baby." Y/N moaned, slinging her arm across his back as he enveloped her tongue in a deep, passionate kiss.

"Are you already this desperate for me?" He teased, situating himself lower, lining his mouth up with her pussy.

Y/N could feel her orgasm beginning to pit in her stomach, John then left a drawn out lick across her pussy, feeling her thighs tense around his face as he continued eating her out.

She tugged at his hair, twisting her fingers through his blonde fringe as another whine escaped from between her lips, cursing profanities under her sharp breath as the man worked his mouth beneath her.

He could feel her legs tense around him, John lifted his face away from her pussy, leaning back up to Y/N as she cupped his face, running her thumb across his lips.

"You're beautiful like this, Y/N, I swear I'm gonna ruin you for anyone else." John muttered, gazing into her eyes before he lined himself up with her pussy.

"Please John, you already have, I'm yours to keep." Y/N whined out, still getting used to the feeling of her pitting orgasm.

John rocked into her, filling her pussy with the entire length of his cock, letting out a low moan, slowly but deeply rocking inside of her.

Y/N let out a cry of pleasure, arching her back as she dug her nails into the couch, rolling her eyes back as John picked up his pace.

"John, please, fuck me, please!" Y/N moaned out, John threw his head back in pleasure, hitting deeper and deeper inside of her as he leaned his body down closer to her, leaving her neck with deep, red and purple marks.

Y/N slung her arms around him, clawing at his back as he slammed inside of her, pushing her closer and closer to her climax.

John whimpered, feeling his orgasm curl inside of him as Y/N whined and moaned all for him, wrapping her legs around his hips, trying to get as close as possible.

His cock slammed throughout her, sending a shock of her upcoming orgasm through her spine, feeling tears well up in her eyes.

"I think I'm close, please! I need you, John, I need all of you." Y/N groaned out, bucking her hips up against the man.

His dick continued filling her walls, chasing the pleasure of his upcoming orgasm, heavily rocking inside of Y/N.

John leaned down towards her, attempting to kiss her, but only ended up panting inside of each other's mouths, spitting profanities & pornographic moans as they both hit their climax together as he came inside of Y/N, both riding out their highs.

"Are you okay?" John asked, wrapping his arms around Y/N.

She looked up and nodded, kissing him tenderly as he put his hand on the side of her neck.

John grinned, "Who ended up bruising my pretty baby this bad?" He huffed sarcastically, pressing a soft kiss to her skin as the pair cuddled up to eachother.

Y/N rolled her eyes as she nudged his chest, "I wonder who".

"Y'know, maybe you could convince Simon to bring you around here more often." John teased, kissing her temple.

"Maybe".

⊰ End ⊰

[p1utofairy]

PICK A CARD

“something heavenly led me to you.”

★ what will your future partner’s family & friends think of you?

DISCLAIMER: take what resonates, leave what doesn't. omg s/o to anon for requesting this — this was such a cool read so thank you for sharing this idea. enjoy bbys.

PILE 1. ❄️

how their family views you:

pile one i feel like your future partner’s mother is really going to like you! your person could come from a culturally different background, but you two just make sense together. i think that your charisma/mindset/demeanor is what initially made your person fall head over heels for you - and your charm will work just as much on their family as it does on them. their mother is going to ADORE you! omg i see the mom pulling your person aside towards the end of the evening (it looks like a dinner or a social gathering of some sort) and they whisper to them, “you picked a good one. i’m proud of you.” AWWW they have this twinkle in their eyes like they’re about to cry. you’re everything that they could’ve ever hoped/prayed for your person to bring home. you’ve got the whole package in their eyes! you might be a little shy when you first meet their family — i’m seeing you get all antsy and jittery while you’re getting ready, but your person is going to hold your hand the whole way through…you will never feel alone.

even when you’re talking to their family members, i see them keeping a gentle hand on your back or their arm resting on the back of your chair; just little gestures and signs to make you feel comfortable and secure. i don’t think they’ve ever really brought anyone home to meet their parents/family…i’m seeing that scene from ‘how to lose a guy in 10 days’ after the game of bullshit, andie is like “how many other girls have lost this game?” or something like that and ben’s mom is like “what other girls, honey? you’re the first girl he’s ever brought home.” and andie’s face drops like WHAT?!?!! lol yeah that’ll be your reaction if that ends up being the case, cause it'll just solidify how your person has never experienced something as real and beautiful as the connection they share with you.

your persons family will see that they’re making an effort with you. they may have been a bit of a player before they met you, but you unlock a different side of your partner that they’ve never seen before. they’re like “[YOUR PARTNER'S NAME]? is that you?” LOL they’ll be thoroughly shocked when they see how enraptured and affectionate they are with you. i’m hearing caught up in the rapture by anita baker mhm they loooooveeeeee you, pile 1. i’m tryna not to cry :,) but they love you so damn much it's so wholesome. every moment with them is gonna feel like you're on cloud 9 — this is a whimsical ‘once in a life time’ type of love. they would scream their love for you from the mountain tops if that's what was asked of them. you make them feel like they can do anything, and that's why their family is gonna love you so much. you bring out the best in this person, UGH. LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS.

how their friends view you:

not far off from how their family will feel about you — their friends will also approve of you! like i said before, you seriously bring out another side of your partner that they haven’t even seen before either. if anything, they feel like their friend is more motivated and less in their head about shit since you’ve come into the picture. i think your partner used to be really pessimistic and a bit of a downer when it came to love/relationships, but meeting you helped them realize that love truly is real. their friends will think that you’re very witty and knowledgeable, you may like to debate about certain topics and they’ll find it hilarious and engage with you. they may also think that you're a bit stubborn lol but ultimately you’re persuasive enough to make them see your point of view. i think they'll really like you, and they'll love how different you are from the previous love interests your person would bring around/talk about.

PILE 2. 🌬️

how their family views you:

hey pile 2! i'm ngl i'm kinda picking up on some mommy issues here? i don't think your partner has the greatest relationship with their mother. they posibly had an absent mother or their mother was very cold towards them growing up. your person had to grow up fast (they didn't have a choice) is what i'm hearing. if not that, then they might’ve grew up in a household where love and care was never displayed or given to them. your persons energy is very masculine and kind of cold.

they didn't have a stable home life growing up, so the idea of "family" is a bit foreign to them. YOU are their family, their home (ugh i'm not gonna cryyyyyy) and their light. before you came into their life, they were solely content with just being alone and doing what they wanted to do, cause they felt like nobody truly cared enough about them. damn someone was really tough on them — TW [one of their parents might've been addicted to drugs/alcohol/abusive] i'm sensing a feeling of neglect from your person's childhood.

their father may have raised them or an older brother or an uncle…idk there's an important masculine figure in their life that tries to help them navigate through life. this male figure will approve of you and this relationship — this is the first time in forever that they've actually seen your partner truly happy. they know what this person’s been through, and how much their trauma has held them back from positive experiences; but again, you’re the light in their life. love by musiq soulchild is playing, “through all the ups and downs the joy and hurt…love. for better or worse i still will choose you first.” your person will take this leap of faith and take a chance on this connection…that's how deep their emotions run for you.

it's gonna take everything in them not to self-sabotage due to their trauma, but this masculine figure in their life is going to have a talk with them and really make them think about what they’d be giving up if they were to let you go. after this conversation they're going to realize how much you mean to them and how they can't imagine a world without you being by their side — they're gonna put a ring on it. YUP PILE 2. you heal this person in so many ways that i can't even fully express. they’re always learning something new from you and they see you as such a positive influence in their life.

how their friends view you:

their friends know how much they've been through, and how hard it was for your person to get close to anyone platonically let alone romantically. so you coming into your partner's life will be an absolute shock to them, but they'll be super appreciative of you! they see the passion and happiness you ignite in their friend, pile 2. they'll think you're an absolute gem. they'll be happy that you two are together and i see them clowning their friend (all in good humor) about how sprung you got them lol this is so light-hearted compared to their family dynamic. your partner’s friends really became their family — they were right there in their time of need. i feel like you and their friend group will mesh together so well.

PILE 3. ☃️

how their family views you:

seeing how tight knit this person is with their family might be a bit intimidating at first, pile 3. you're gonna be in your head like "omg will they like me? will i fit in?" their family dynamic might differ from yours in terms of how they talk/interact/express themselves — you might be used to sitting back and keeping to yourself during family events. you're not loud or overly expressive when communicating with/around your family, so seeing how boisterous and animated this person and their family members can be will catch you off guard.

i'm seeing that they might be big football fans or something of that nature where they’ll host a party/gathering and have drinks, food, entertainment — i'm getting a lot of fun and playful energy from your persons family! they'll see that you naturally keep to yourself, but that won't stop them from encouraging you to join the festivities and make you feel welcomed. i see you joining them on a lot of trips, vacations, gatherings, parties, etc. you're gonna have a ball with your future partner's family. you’ll love to see your partner in their element…that’s what’s going to make you want to open up and join in with them.

your future partner’s family will think that you have a great head on your shoulders, and they’ll truly see how much you’ve ground your partner. your person is naturally funny and flirty (they could possibly be an air sign) but their family will notice a newfound sense of maturity about them. i can hear them asking your partner, "when are you ever going to grow up?” lol they are just full of so much energy and they're playful at heart.

they operate a lot from their inner child and that's what will make you fall for them. you are rigid when it comes to letting your hair down, and just doing whatever you want whenever you want. however, your person has mastered the concept of spontaneity! they love doing things on the whim and just saying “FUCK IT, WE BALL!!!" i mean don't get me wrong they can be practical and level-headed, but they also want to be happy and allow themselves to experience the joys in life.

random but they might love ‘the dark knight’ movie and quote the joker a lot cause i'm hearing “why so serious?” lol your person is a goofball…it's so cute and it also makes sense, because their family is so down to earth and ‘go with the flow’ type of people. their family will feel like you’re a great addition to the family, and they’ll feel so proud that your partner found someone like you.

how their friends view you:

your partner’s friends are gonna feel like you’re hot as fuck? uh OKAY then! you def are attractive af pile 3 but damn someone in this friend group might be plottin' frfr uhm. i'm feeling like this is one specific friend…the rest of their friends are gonna be happy about this relationship but this specific person is giving off weird vibes 😬 like i can see you and your partner sitting on the couch all close and cuddly, in y’alls own little cutesy bubble, and this person is watching y'all from a distance thinking to themselves that should be me like WHAT?! this specific friend feels like you're a rare catch…they are giving off immature vibes ugh they could be younger than your partner or just really really childish i don't like it. they definitely want your person to fumble but guess what — that's not happening! your person will come to see them for who they truly are and they will cut them off expeditiously LOL GOOD RIDDANCE. you and your future partner's relationship will prevail and the foundation you two are building together will remain solid.

[tokiro07]

So now we've gotten a peek at the Master Rules and it's kind of confirmed this theory I've been brewing.

I is obviously Death, I think II is religion and III is sex (I know people are thinking "Life" due to her DNA hair, but I think she's sex/gender because what's the point of sex/gender other than to spread different types of DNA. If we all did asexual reproduction, then all our DNA would be the same). And then there's various others. But Move isn't there. Move isn't a master rule.

Which kind of confused me for a bit because... In order for anything to be anything, it has to move. Forget humans; we see in the rules table that the rules are "moving" around--one is reading (needs to move to turn pages), it looks like Sex is talking to Death (moving her mouth and in her chair), Sick has obviously been moved around a lot by virtue of getting his ass beat. So even the master rules need the rule of "move", yet Move is not a master rule.

So I was thinking that, other than Master Rules, there's another type of rules. I've just been referring to them as "Base Rules", because without them as the Base, there's literally nothing. Move is one--move is a rule that comes from things existing. Communication/Tell is another--if more than one thing exists, they'll find a way to communicate with each other. Personally, I think Rule Change is IV (the kid next to religion), but if Change isn't a Master rule, then it would be another Base rule.

I don't think "Base Rules" will be canonized as like a new big bad or anything. This is just me thinking about the rules of the Rules. It does make me wonder though--Master Rules are created by God, but God follows the Base Rules (Luna communicates, Sun moves/is unmoved, etc). So were the Base Rules made at the same time as God? Would that make Move just as much God as Sun or Luna? Or is God--Sun and Luna--themselves another "Base Rule"?

I think there might be a bit of a miscommunication on Tozuka's part about the term "Master Rules"

In ch.177, Apocalypse's exact words are as follows:

"The Master Rules...a set of Rules chosen after all of you lose to Ragnarok...that will never disappear. This time, Galaxy was chosen. That is why stars and celestial bodies have been here from the start. UMA chosen as Master Rules possess absolute power. The ten added in the initial stage are the strongest."

The wording of this implies that "the ten added in the initial stage" are among the Master Rules, not the only Master Rules. I've mentioned it before, but we saw firsthand that not all Rules vanish when their UMA die - Magma, Slice and Gravity, the trio that Andy slew that prompted Sun to create Seal, didn't seem to have any impact on the world upon their deaths, and in fact we continued to see characters affected by gravity, continued to see cutting attacks in use, and most notably saw magma erupt from the ground when Andy was hit with Unluck

This suggests that these UMA specifically were among the "Master Rules," the Rules that "will never disappear," but were not among "the ten added in the initial stage," as they were clearly much weaker than Sick. I imagine that Move and Spoil are among these, as their removal would be wildly detrimental to the world

I think the major point of confusion is that Tozuka showed us the tablet of Rules while explaining the Master Rules concept. Juiz told us in ch.20 that this tablet has 101 empty slots that are filled when a penalty is received, but if the ten Master Rules are present from the start, then they wouldn't be added after the Quests are failed

Maybe the UMA are summoned to our world afterward and it's irrelevant whether the Rule was present or not, but that doesn't really line up with what we know so far either

It's possible this is a retcon, it's possible that there was a mistranslation along the way because there was a double meaning that no one could have caught, and it's possible that Juiz was simply lying about the function of the tablet to justify knowing the term Ragnarok

Personally, I think the last one makes the most sense and that the tablet isn't counting down the number of failed Quests, but rather counting up the number of loops. Juiz knew that there was only one use of Ark left, and seeing that the tablet had two slots left just happened to line up perfectly, didn't it?

We'll most likely know the exact details next week, but one thing that's clear to me is that Tozuka has deliberately left a few key bits out so we would need to keep guessing for as long as possible

[sugdenlovesdingle]

So I got caught up on Station 19 and I have thoughts™

Andy captain of 19 - well she's about the only one that hasn't been captain so far so I guess it's her turn now

Jack definitely has some kind of brain injury. The fall earlier in the season and the headwound in the season finale - he's screwed.

Theo/Vic + whatshername - I'm over it already. It was obvious they were going to make him cheat with her. It's dumb and annoying and Vic deserves better.

Travis - I knew he was going to concede to the other candidate. He was never going to quit firefighting for politics. Didn't see the Eli thing coming though. But just what is going on there? Eli spent basically the entire season flirting with Andy and then suddenly he's dating Travis? Is he bi? Was Travis his bi awakening? (relatable)

Warren - him not being able to save that last guy at the house fire had me in tears. Seriously. And I thought his guilt over it would be a bigger issue... but maybe they'll continue that in the next season.

Maya/Carina - my girls. My loves. I'm so glad they're back together and happy again. I think they should do a vow renewal next season. To really secure that foundation Maya was talking about. But them agreeing to have a baby/start ivf and then the waitress at the ball going into labour and planning to put the baby up for adoption? And her not doing so well after the floor collapse? The baby being a boy when Carina has said she wanted a boy? I have a feeling where this is going and I'm not sure I like it.

Chief Ross - I hope she stays on somehow. She's a badass and I started to like her. Especially when she took the whole sullivan thing and turned it around/ told her version of the story.

Sullivan - over it and him.

Beckett - please tell me he's not coming back.

Killing off Dixon seems like such a cop out. He's been THE villain for several seasons and now he just dies? Meh.

New union guy - is he going to be the new Dixon?

[our-flag-means-love]

alright, so i made this playlist with the target audience of Specifically Me, but if anyone else loves both ofmd and the killers as much as i do, may i present:

Ed x Stede, as told by The Killers

15 songs, 59 minutes in total.

(also on youtube, if you don't use spotify or aren't able to listen in order, which i highly recommend)

i wanted to challenge myself to tell the story of their relationship (throughout s1 + a bit of hopeful speculation) using only songs by the band that's been rotting my brain for the past year, and i think i was able to do it surprisingly cohesively.

a brief explanation and lyric highlight for each choice can be found under the cut.

(all lyrics are taken from genius, in case some don't match what you hear or don't match what spotify says)

1. boy

this could really be read as either a stede childhood song or an ed childhood song. both? both is good.

these streets / weren't meant to house / jet-fueled engine dreams

2. When You Were Young

hoo boy, if there was ever a song about ed having religious trauma.

he doesn't look a thing like jesus / but he talks like a gentleman / like you imagined when you were young

3. I Can't Stay

sorry to go straight from one of their best songs to one of their... not best songs. but yes, stede leaving mary.

in the dark, for a while now / i can't stay, very far / i can't stay much longer / riding my decision home

4. The Man

the man, the myth, the legend, Blackbeard™, with a head made of smoke and all that.

i got skin in the game / i got a household name / i got news for you baby, you're looking at the man

5. Flesh And Bone

except, oops, he's actually a person, too. and his relationship with his near-mythical persona is a complicated one.

what are you afraid of? / and what are you made of? / flesh and bone / and i'm running out of time

6. Tidal Wave

they're falling in love, your honor.

you say this life has given you nothing / you got another thing coming

7. Andy, You're A Star

uh oh, ed's prioritizing love and happiness over his career and his fame! izzy sure isn't happy about that.

in a car with a girl / promise me she's not your world / 'cause andy, you're a star

8. Mr. Brightside

yeah, i'm sorry, i know this song is overplayed, but i had to. here comes calico jack, my beloved dumpster fire, to separate our boys.

jealousy / turning saints into the sea / swimming through sick lullabies / choking on your alibis

9. Neon Tiger

ah, here they come, that good ol' english navy looking for stede.

run neon tiger, there's a price on your head / they'll hunt you down and gut you / i'll never let 'em touch you

10. Leave The Bourbon On The Shelf

ed's time away from stede is pretty dang miserable. and for this song's eerie ending, picture his smile right before he pushes lucius overboard.

before you say goodbye / leave the bourbon on the shelf / and i'll drink it by myself / and i love you endlessly

11. Everything Will Be Alright

stede, my sweet optimistic boy, you have no idea what you're returning to.

and you don't need to compromise / i'm dreaming 'bout those dreamy eyes / i never knew, i never knew / but it's alright

12. The Rising Tide

angry! ed! breakup! song!

before life and the dream collide / 'cause the truth's gonna come and cut me open wide / and you can't escape the rising of the tide

13. Have All The Songs Been Written?

stede's apology.

i just need one more to get through to you / i can't take back what i've done wrong / i just need one more

14. All These Things That I've Done

ed coming to terms with his past, his present, and his future.

these changes ain't changing me / the cold-hearted boy i used to be

15. Bones

they've reunited for good, and now they fuck. (seriously, the following are probably my favorite lines but they don't nearly do justice to how horny this song is.)

there's someone calling / an angel whispers my name / but the message relayed is the same: / "wait 'til tomorow, you'll be fine"

if you've read this far, thank you so much for indulging this intersection of my two biggest brainrots of 2022. for making it to the end, i'll reward you with the opportunity to Behold the kiss again: