#like they built ass curvature into this little guy

[floorpancakes]

accidental still life

[tparker48]

Request for Ayosus

After falling victim to a Ashton's prank, Austin was made pliable as he was turned into a pair of underwear. He tried him on for himself, mushing him between his cheeks as the thin lining danced over his hole. Having had his fun, he placed Austin along the bench as he fished for the antidote. But his friend Jeremy distracted him, telling Ashton about their last game.

Austin couldn't access the rest of his face, flopping around the bench to turn himself over. "Hey guys? A little help here?"

He slowly moved along the edge of the bench, the sleeve of the jockstrap slouching toward the floor. Jerking again, gravity took control as he fell off the bench, landing in a duffle back further below. It reeked of musk, a dildo bulging into his face.

He struggled to remove the rubbery cock head. His mouth snagging on the puffed edges "Gas? Halp!"

The two continued to talk, turning the corner as Jermey showed images on his phone. Another door soon opened, water droplets hitting the cemented floor before a shadow appeared over the bag. Austin couldn't muster the strength to turn himself to look, forcing himself to use his weak angle of his eyes as he looked around the filled bag. He noticed a translucent cup just next to him, a glare from the slanted ceiling as a figure loomed overhead.

A watery hand soon entered, cold droplets pattering into his gaping hole as he was lifted to the outside. The bag came into view. Watery feet wiggling below as a towel wrapped around a pair of legs. Fingertips tapped at the jockstrap, Austin's gaze filling with a built football player as their face came to view. It was Zane, the gassy football player on his team. His gaze was turned forward, fingers widening the underwear as he peeked inside.

"I know for a fact these aren't my underwear, who keeps leaving these in here?" He said, prodding at the puckering cushion.

Austin's eyes scrunched as his hole was stretched open. He wanted to close it to deter from the humiliation, but the prying finger denied it as it burrowed through his now cottoned backside.

"Hmm, ah well. I guess I can try these on, beats wearing my boxers again after practice." Zane unraveled his towel, letting it drop to the floor before he lowered the jockstrap to his feet. Stepping inside, he guided it up his thigh as it cushioned beneath him.

Austin gazed around him, towering thighs filling his peripheral as he rose higher up. Round muscle caved into his facing, rolling beneath him as his elasticity was put to the test. His eyes slanted. His mouth thinned as he sank between flesh and drenched him in warm water. His ass pulled away from him, the cock protruding in between as it guided itself into his hole.

Austin winced, his limbs aching as they were stretched like taffy. "That's..Ah! Hey!"

Zane snapped the waistband along himself, adjusting the front of the jockstrap as the corners of his testicles bulged from the curvature of the fabric. "Damn these sure are tight. Whoever wears these daily really needs a wardrobe change."

He lifted his shorts to his legs, tucking the jockstrap inside as he grabbed the rest of his things. Austin was shrouded in darkness, the mounds tenderizing corners of his face as the player began to walk. This is maddening, Austin thought. This was supposed to be a light prank, not a change of fashion. He struggled against his restrained environment, each step sinking him back to the puckered hole that pinched at his face.

**********************************************

Zane tied his shorts around his waist before taking a turn toward the exercising room. The day was still young enough for him to get a quick exercise before traffic kicked in through the gym. entering through the metal doors, he followed the pathway towards the glass rooms that rested around him, selecting one in the far corner where dumb bells rested on the shelves.

He closed the door, taking the time to stretch his legs to warm them up. They snagged against the jockstrap, twisting like gears rusted together as it pulled at his pubic hairs. These things were certainly rigid, he thought. He tugged harder as they slid against them, stretching them to its max as he took a step.

"Zane!" Austin's voice rang. Softened by the player's glutes.

Zane turned around, following the voice behind him, finding only himself in the room as the other rooms were clear. He could have swore he heard someone. Was it just in his head? He shrugged as he took to the equipment, exercising his arms as he sat upon the bench.

"Yo Zane!" A voice came from the door, Ashton entering as Jeremy followed behind him.

"Oh what's up? I thought I heard someone talking." Zane said, dabbing them as they closed the door.

"What, did you think you were the only one looking for a quiet space? Hah, don't think so."

"We were just having a little fun with Austin. Though he seemed to have slipped from our sight" Ashton said.

Zane lifted his weights, squatting down to grab another dumb bell. "He always seems to do that. If he's not distant he's up in your business." He continued to lift, but felt a snag pull at his hairs. He winced at the sharp pain, forcing himself out of the crouched position as he sat the dumbbells along the corner. "And he's not the only one, this jockstrap is so damn tight."

"Take off your shorts, that should do it."

"I don't want to risk the coach walking in on us. Still remember he thought we were having a cock contest."

"Ah don't be such a worry wart." Ashton said. "There's no one here besides us."

That statement didn't sound promising, but it was better than having his undergarments tearing at his body. He ringed his fingers along the rim of his shorts, stepping out of them as he scooted it beneath the bench. "There, that feels a lot better."

He stretched his legs and popped his toes, returning back to his squats before he lost track. The two watched as he lifted himself from the ground. Ashton eyed Zane's backside, the jockstrap wrapped around drawing his attention. He moved in, walking behind Zane as he could feel the wind flow from his body.

"Ah how badly I wanted to let them breathe. You have no Ide-" a palm struck his backside, his muscle recoiling as he locked in place. His glutes rippled, a burning sensation spreading across his left cheek. "The hell?!"

"Mm, it's got that ripple effect to it." Ashton said.

"Really? Let me have a try." Jeremy said.

Zane shrouded his behind with his palms. "Nobody's trying anything! This ass is unsmakable!"

"Aw come on, just a little squeeze. Those things really bring out your ass."

"Yeah, like a giant beach ball."

"You think?..I mean, no! It's off limits." Zane grabbed his shorts beneath the bench and placed them back on.

He could still feel the impact from Ashton's palm, pulsing beneath the layers of his shorts. He'd better not half left a mark, he thought. But despite the smack, Ashton's words did stick, this jockstrap does bring out his ass. Too much if it got them excited. Maybe he could..no, he didn't have time to think about it now. He had to get home before the sun left the sky.

**********************************************

The door opened softly as the cool air welcomed Zane. His tired feet aching from the long flight of stairs as they carried him through the room. He turned the conditioning higher, stripping down to his underwear as he walked around the living room.

Deep between his mounds, Austin still remained squished, unable to smell the cool air blowing into the player's body as salty fluid dampened the middle of his face. How long has it been since he's been worn? He couldn't remember the time of day before he was succumbed by the mountain of flesh. Even without the fabric covering overhead, the space looked dim as he gazed out from the valleyed crack.

But that all changed as a thud rung through the walls, the crack rippling before fingers widened them.

The musky scenery transformed, cool conditioning blowing into Austin as the scent of roses carried in its wind. Looking through the narrow window of the mounds, he saw Zane move through the room as a mattress rested near the wall, tossing off the last of his clothing as it dangled off the far shelf.

A mirror loomed into his view, Zane's slender physique filling the frame as he looked back and rubbed over his rear. He pinched at the cheek, exposing his predicament mirror. "Damn thing's in there deep, no wonder it was soar on the way here."

Austin squinted upon the player's pries, flinching as fingers prodded at the strip. He tried opening his mouth, but found them sealed shut by the crumpled folds, barely able to let out a mutter as the fingers climbed over him. The digit ringed beneath his face, bulging one side off the other as it stirred inside the puckering hole behind him. He winced at its sloppy sound, like someone smacking their lips in his ear as the finger nudged against him.

"I guess that's gonna be the best gap. My guts feel like they're on fire." Zane said.

Zane took a breath, the mounds rippling as bubbling filled Austin's lobes. That couldn't be what he thought it was, he thought. He didn't know if he could even withstand its blasts. The glutes turned to the ceilings, fingers latching to the corners of the ass as they pulled more flesh apart. A hiss rang from the hole like a tear in an inflatable device, warmth radiating his nostrils as it climbed to the rest of the fabric.

"That's it..just gotta..s..squeeze it." Zane said, churns resonating in his waist as he pulled his cheeks further apart.

Austin winced at the player's foul aroma, a sharp scent of sulfur bringing him to tears as it soaked into him. He'd believe he'd melt with how hot it was, but the mixture of the cool conditioning deterred that from happening. But it did nothing for the frowsy breath that remained. Moans filled the air, a finger dipping into his face as they released the bonds blocking his mouth, stuffing the fingertip inside as it drove into the tight sphincter.

"Ah fuck, there we go. That feels a little bit better." Zane leaned his rear higher, fingering the fabric as his shaft erected.

It was like being skewered as Austin endured the assault. The salty finger in his mouth was already enough he could handle, but the impact of the cock against his hole drove him on edge as he squirmed pleasure. His moans softened by the finger, gumming at the knuckle to catch Zane's attention. He tried to muster words, but came distorted by the flesh blanketed by his own body, shriveling as the finger retracted.

Zane was drunk on his own pleasure, cupping his crotch as it leaked seed from deeper within. Hands clutched eagerly at the corner of his ass, sending Austin in darkness once again as muscle squeaked around him. The earthy scent spread along the walls like cologne, constantly invading his nose as the sweat soaked higher into the fabric.

The hand tossed to the side, Zane beginning to loft as he leaned off the bed. He looked to his bubbled glutes, ringing his fingers against the lining of his crack as a fart squeezed from inside. He pulled them apart, the puckered star blossoming as it nipped at Austin. He farted again, its boom shaking him to his core as it rumbled through him.

Austin blinked to adjust to the blistering air, his lips more maneuverable as he smacked the ends together. “Z..Za..Zan-” a ring echoed through the room, Zane turning over as he picked up the phone.

"Yo Ashton, finally decided to get out of the gym?” Zane said.

“Yeah we decided to call it quits, we can’t seem to find Austin anywhere.”

“Bummer, that sucks. He must’ve gone home when we went to the gym. You know how he gets when it comes to being a plus one.”

“Hehe, yeah I suppose you're right.” his friend said. “Say, you still have that underwear on?”

Austin tried to speak, but the player's thighs mushed against him. “Yeah, I still got them on. They’re still tight, but I think my ass is starting to get used to them.”

“You should wear them often, they make you look sexy. With how tight they are I bet they remind me of when I tried on Austin.”

"Tried on?"

“I-I mean would you look at the time, I’d best be getting some sleep. Chow!”

Zane opened his mouth to speak, but the line ended as a buzz rang through his ear. Shrugging it off, he pulled the covers over his waist. Leaving just a glimpse of his smooth rear as it pointed to the mirror. He smiled as he looked to his backside. “Fuck it, I'm already too deep to not wear where them now. Though they could use a bit of stretching.”

He rubbed over his glutes with the covers, his fingers ringing into his crack. He heaved at himself, gas spewing out from his hole as it escaped into the open air. Austin looked through the tight valley, his eyes watering as he tried to call for Zane. But the sharp hiss drowned him out, the glutes closing together as they sealed his fate. From that day one, he was no more than a pair of undergarments. Worn to every occasion Zane went to as he traveled through practice. Many still wonder where Austin disappeared to. But if they listened, they could hear the soft sound of muffling. But they will never know from where.

[baepsaesbae]

QuaranTime

Pairing— Kim Seokjin x reader x Min Yoongi  

Genre— SMUT like str8 up pwp

Warnings— Double penetration, threesome, oral (f receiving), nipple  play, a butt slap, masturbation (male), unprotected sex, sensual themes in general

Word Count—  ~2.6k  

Summary— Bored and horny with your roommates during a social distancing period. What could go wrong?    

A/N— Hi everyone! I hope you’re all staying safe and healthy~ Here’s a little something that will hopefully help lift your mood. Please let me know what you think!                                

 Your roommates have always been competitive. That was one of the first things you noticed about them when you moved in. They competed to see who could help you move in the fastest (which was a blessing since you didn’t have to do any heavy lifting). Living with two random guys was an interesting thing to get used to, especially when they were already friends. It’s been a year since you moved in, and since then all three of you had gotten pretty close.

Now, due to the ongoing pandemic, everyone has been ordered to stay inside. It’s been months now, and you could swear you were all going insane. Playing board or card games always resulted in a sore loser (one or both of the boys). Day drinking had become such a common occurrence that even the thought of alcohol made you guys feel queasy, so that was out of the question now.

“Whoever does the next grocery trip can get puzzles?” you offered.

“You think I wanna do puzzles with Jin? That guy has no patience. I give him five minutes before he starts getting bored,” Yoongi scoffed.

“You WISH you lasted five minutes!” Jin childishly argued.

“We all know you’re a one pump chump,” Yoongi rolled his eyes.

You observed them silently from the couch, doing your best not to smile. They’ve been your main source of entertainment during these trying times. Their bickering was comparable to cheesy reality TV shows.

“What are you laughing at over there?” Jin dragged you into the conversation.

“Can you guys make fun of each other’s sex lives later? Let’s get back to curing our current boredom,” you responded.

“We have too much testosterone built up right now. Let us yell at each other for a bit first,” Jin said before turning back to Yoongi, “I think it’s pretty obvious who gets the most action around here!”

“You don’t SEE the girls I bang because I go over to THEIR place like a GENTLEMAN,” Yoongi raised his voice.

“So what? Are you guys gonna jack off in front of each other to prove who can last the longest?” you laughed.

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Jin’s squeaky laugh filled the room, “Unless…” he shot a sideways glance at Yoongi.

“There’s no way in hell that I’m doing that,” Yoongi immediately dismissed the thought, “But ___...how are you holding up?”

“Me? I’m fine. Online classes are weird but most of my professors are being super lenient so--”

“Not that,” he interrupted you, “You know…like uh...”

“He’s asking if you’re sexually frustrated,” Jin explained bluntly.

“Okay, I know I don’t get nearly as many dick appointments as you two but I make do,” you answered defensively.

“I may have an idea to settle our argument, but we’d need your help,” Yoongi tilted his head in contemplation.

“Are you guys both gonna fuck me?” you asked, now amused at the thought.

“Yes and no. If you’re okay with it, we’d be going at the same time. One in the front and one in the back. Unless you want both of us in the back, that part is up to you. Whoever cums first loses,” Yoongi explained.

“What does the winner get?” you try to mask your interest, it’s been so long since you’ve had any physical intimacy.

“They get to have fun with you all night long while the loser has to sit and watch,” Jin answered gleefully.

Both boys seemed to be completely on board with the idea. All they needed was for you to give them the green light.

“You guys are positive that things won’t be weird afterward?” you asked.

They both gave you their word. You took it with a grain of salt, knowing that neither of them have been laid in weeks. To be honest, you have been extremely horny lately. Living with two handsome guys wasn’t helping you. All rational thoughts were thrown out the window.

“I’d prefer one in the front and one in the back then,” you winked.

“Coin toss to see who’s where?” Yoongi suggested to Jin.

“Tails cuz I want that ass,” Jin answered with a smirk, causing you to roll your eyes.

“Dammit, tails,” Yoongi announced.

“Are we just going straight into this then?” you asked nervously.

“Don’t be silly. We’re gentlemen, foreplay is our middle name,” Jin took you by the hand and led you to Yoongi’s room, “It’s your idea, so we’re gonna use your room,” Jin said before Yoongi could complain.

They sat you on the bed, and that’s when things suddenly got awkward. All three of you stared at each other in silence, waiting for the first person to make a move. You were beginning to doubt your decision, and almost opened your mouth to call it off.

“Can I kiss you, ___?” Yoongi broke the silence.

“Uh, sure,” you agreed, scooting over to make space for him on the bed.

Yoongi shyly sat down beside you, showing you a side of him that you’ve never seen before. He softly brought his hand to your cheek as your eyes met. Your heart was racing, and you were sure Yoongi could hear it as he leaned in closer.

Meeting Yoongi in the middle was a dream come true. Admittedly, you’ve had a minor crush on both of them since you’ve moved in, but who could blame you?

Yoongi’s soft lips brushed up gently against yours. You found yourself melting into his palm as he continued to cup your face. The kiss was gentle and intimate, something you never wanted to end. Until you were abruptly yanked from Yoongi’s grasp.

“Hey what the fu--”

“My turn,” was all that Jin said before his lips crashed against yours.

Unlike Yoongi’s tender kiss, Jin kissed you with such a ferocious passion, it was almost as if you’d been dating and he hadn’t seen you in months. His hands immediately began to wander across your body, starting from your hips and working their way upward. You softly moaned into his mouth when his hands slid under your shirt to fondle your breasts. You yelped with surprise when he began to pinch and pull at your nipples.

“You’re so sensitive,” he chuckled, “This’ll be fun.”

“Stop hogging her,” Yoongi grumbled.

“Make me,” Jin challenged.

Yoongi yanked you away from Jin, and pushed you onto your back. His plush lips connected with your neck, aka your weak spot. You stifled a moan as he began to mix in small nibbles with his kisses.

“Take off your pants,” he ordered you, his dominance reemerging.

You shook off your pajama pants, revealing a plain pair of panties. You suddenly wished that you had gone to change into something sexier, and as such your body involuntarily shied away from Yoongi.

Jin pinned your legs down. He was about to kiss your stomach when Yoongi shooed him away. Jin was displeased but obeyed anyway, curious to see what the younger man would do. Yoongi kissed a trail down your neck, between your breasts, across your stomach, and finally settled at the top of your panties. He planted kisses on your inner thighs, inching closer and closer to your pussy.

“Let’s get this off,” Jin focused your attention back on him as he tugged at your shirt.

“Then you guys have to take yours off too,” you huffed.

“Of course, princess,” Jin kissed your forehead, his sudden affection making you freeze.

He helped you take off your shirt, and in turn took his off afterward. You were about to make a comment on his physique when Yoongi flattened his tongue against your clothed core.

“Don’t ignore me,” Yoongi growled.

“Take off your shirt,” Jin reminded him.

“In due time, I don’t think she wants to wait any longer,” Yoongi said as he pulled aside your panties.

He licked up from your entrance to your clit. His tongue teased your clit in slow circles, causing you to moan. You covered your mouth in embarrassment, but Jin swatted your hand away.

“Don’t ignore me either,” he whispered as his lips once again connected with yours.

Jin played with your nipples as his mouth collided with yours. His kisses were wet and messy, but you didn’t care. You were lost in ecstacy. Yoongi’s mouth was heaven sent; every flick of his tongue had you moaning into Jin’s mouth. You gasped when he stuck a finger inside, curling to hit your g-spot.

“I think she’s ready,” Yoongi cockily stated.

“You ready for us baby?” Jin asked sweetly.

A simple head nod was all you could give them without getting too flustered. You couldn’t believe that you were in this situation. You were roughly flipped over onto your stomach before you could think too much about it.

The boys tugged off their pants and positioned themselves on either side of you. You looked up at Yoongi with anticipation. The moment he looked down and saw you, his cheeks reddened and he had to look away.

“You can take it out...if you want,” Yoongi muttered.

You didn’t hesitate to tug down his underwear, revealing his thick dick. You began to salivate on sight, you’ve never seen such a pretty cock before. You got closer to lick it when a sharp pain stung your ass.

“We have to go at the same time. Bad girl,” Jin admonished.

You felt him run his cock against your wet pussy, teasing you even more.

“Wait, shit. I should go get a condom,” Jin groaned in frustration.

“Just pull out,” you said softly.

“What?” the boys asked in unison with disbelief.

“I’m on the pill so it should be fine. I mean, as long as you’re both clean I’m okay with you guys pulling out,” you clarified.

“You sure?” Jin asked.

You nodded again.

“Alright then. Should I go get a timer?” Jin asked Yoongi.

“It doesn’t fucking matter. Please, I just want her to suck me off already,” Yoongi grew impatient.

“Fine, fine. In 3, 2, 1,” Jin counted down.

The boys entered you in perfect harmony. Jin’s long dick penetrated you deeply, and the curvature of his dick allowed him to graze your g-spot with every stroke. Yoongi let you take the lead as soon as the tip of his dick entered your mouth. He was worried about choking you, so he stood in place. Jin’s powerful thrusts made you gag on Yoongi’s cock anyway. Tears welled in your eyes as Yoongi hit the back of your throat.

There you were, being spitroasted between your roommates. Just the thought alone was enough to get you all riled up. Here you were, living your best life.

You did your best to flatten out your tongue to let Yoongi’s dick slide neatly in and out of your mouth. Unfortunately, Jin’s rough strokes had you moaning uncontrollably. Drool dribbled down your chin and there was nothing you could do about it. You looked up at Yoongi, only to find that his eyes were already set on you.

That did him in.

“Where should I cum? I’m gonna--oh fuck,” Yoongi stuttered as he unleashed his load into your mouth.

Jin was still thrusting, making Yoongi’s explosion even messier. Yoongi collapsed onto the bed beside you, defeated. Jin finally stopped moving and got off the bed.

“You okay?” Yoongi asked you.

You nodded after swallowing some of his cum. Jin came back with a warm washcloth and wiped off your face. He even handed you a glass of water. You were happy to see that his kindhearted nature was incorporated into every aspect of his life.

“No water for me?” Yoongi joked.

“No water for losers,” Jin said sternly, “Besides, the night is just getting started.”

You were flipped onto your back (which was a blessing, you were tired of having to prop yourself up with your arms). Jin smirked above you as his hand made a beeline down to your dripping pussy. He fiddled with your sensitive nub, making you squirm beneath him.

“You’re such a good girl, ___,” he cooed, “Don’t worry, I’ll treat you right.”

He inserted himself back in. Instead of resuming his rough pace from before, he took an agonizingly long time to bottom out. He used the same slow pace to pull out. You figured he was going to do it again, but you were wrong. This time, he opted to roll his hips into you. The sensation was different, and it allowed him to set a rhythm that was optimal for both of you. Judging by the high pitch of your moans, he figured you enjoyed it. He was absolutely right.

Yoongi moved to cup your face once more. He was leaning in to kiss you when Jin forcefully pushed him off the bed.

“Dude, what the he--”

“Losers don’t belong on the bed. They definitely don’t get to touch her for the rest of the night,” he snarled as he brought your knees by your ears.

This position let him hit even deeper, which you didn’t even think was possible. Again, he began to roll his hips. He leaned over to kiss you, forcing you to moan into his mouth.

“Hold your legs for me, princess,” Jin whispered.

You complied. As soon as his hands were free, one of them began to stimulate your clit. He went straight to rubbing you quickly, wasting no time in toying with you. It seemed as if he was desperate to make you cum before he did.

From the corner of your eye, you spotted Yoongi sitting at his desk chair, his eyes fixated on you. His pretty hand was wrapped around his fat cock, pumping it quickly. It looked like he wanted to cum with you too. His sweaty hair stuck to his forehead, and his mouth was agape as he concentrated on you. Yoongi gave you a little smile when you looked over at him. This time, it was his turn to make you come undone. That, and of course Jin going to town on you.

“I’m c-coming,” you announced as your body spasmed.

Jin helped you ride out your orgasm, his hand quickened over your clit. The extra stimulus made you squirt all over him, something you’ve never done in your life. Once he was sure that you’ve come down, Jin quickly went to jack himself off over you.

“Fuck, you’re so hot,” he panted before he splattered all over your chest.

Again, Jin went to go get a warm washcloth. In his absence, Yoongi quickly made his way onto the bed to cuddle you. He was the big spoon, and he brought you in close to his chest.

“Did you cum again?” you giggled as you asked.

“I did. Don’t look at my underwear. It was the quickest thing I could grab to clean myself off before Jin came back,” he answered.

“Dude, my cum is still all over her,” Jin said when he got back.

Yoongi just shrugged and kissed your cheek as Jin wiped you off.

“Guess I’m the little spoon then,” Jin said as he wiggled his way into the cuddle session, “Did you enjoy it, ___?” he inquired.

“I did. Maybe a little too much. I’ve never squirted before,” you admitted.

“I can always make you do it again,” Jin laughed.

“I can do it too,” Yoongi chimed in.

“You think you can do that? You can’t even last in her mouth!” Jin mocked.

“You would’ve cum first too if you were in my position!” Yoongi yelled back.

“Looks like you guys have another argument to settle,” you joked, trying to join in the teasing.

“Bet,” Jin said.

“Oh, you’re so on,” Yoongi sneered.

They agreed that the new bet is to be settled at the same time, different place (Jin’s room) tomorrow. You wouldn’t mind spending the rest of your isolated days like this.

Published September 18th, 2020. No editing, copying, translating, or reposting allowed. All Rights Reserved © 2020 Baepsaesbae.

[thanksjro]

Eugenesis, Part Six Scene Six: Jolup Sinks Rewind’s Ship

You sure as shit have, sugarplum.

It’s time to get the down-low on everyone’s favorite severely-depressed detective.

So, hey, remember waaaaay back in Part One, when Nightbeat used his deadname to sign a report accidentally? It’s okay if you don’t, because I sure did.

God, that was ages ago, wasn’t it? Anyway, that string of numbers is his biocode, which I guess sort of functions as his social security number. So, if any of y’all wanna go ahead and steal his identity, I’m not gonna say anything.

Now, that’s a mighty low number for a Transformer. Strikingly low, even. Turns out that Nightbeat wasn’t biomorphically created, but rather cold constructed. Cold construction as a term didn’t exist within the canon when this was written- trust me, I checked. Sure, robots were built, as opposed to bursting from another’s torso like an over-microwaved hotdog, but they usually turned out like the Dinobots… that is to say, not exactly smart.

Cold construction was an experiment, trying to build Transformers outside of the messy lines of “genetics" and “family lineage”, and as it turns out, the first batch didn’t come out as expected. Or, at least, Nightbeat didn’t.

Hey there, friends. Just a head’s up, before I try to tackle this: I am, as far as I’m aware, neurotypical. With that in mind, let’s take a look at what may be an honest attempt at inclusion for a neurodivergent take on a character in a story published in 2001.  

Now, some of these snippets look kind of harsh at face value, but let’s take a closer look. Everything harsh isn’t really Nightbeat putting himself down, but rather him quoting what others have said. Notice the use of quotation marks. Think back to Part One, how he was treated by his peers- they treat him like everyone else, they respect him, they trust his input. Hell, Rodimus himself wanted Nightbeat on the mission to go get Optimus from the past. Nobody who’s been in the story has tried to belittle Nightbeat for being wired differently. That’s fucking phenomenal treatment of a character like him in the early 2000’s.

I’m probably out of my depth here, but it seemed worthwhile to mention.

Anyway, back to the plot.

Right, that.

Nightbeat gets pulled out of his inner monologue when Red Alert asks if he’s okay, since he’s been staring off into space for the last little while. They’re still waiting for Optimus to show up, and everyone’s starting to get antsy. It’s hot as hell over by this collapsing wormhole, which isn’t helping them settle either.

Something finally comes up over the horizon, but you and I both know that it wouldn’t be Eugenesis if things just got on smoothly, now would it? Quantax starts firing on the team of Transformers, while he gets nervous about the wormhole still being there. He decides that if it is, he’ll jump back to this exact point in time to show himself that it is. This is a stupid plan, for a lot of reasons. 

Good idea, Quantax.

While he’s trying to come up with something better, someone lands a lucky shot and takes his ship down. Trailbreaker goes to see who it is, I guess because he isn’t aware of what happened the last time a Transformer went to go see Quantax.  

Oh no, he’s been turned into The Transformers The Movie Prowl!

Before anyone can try and save Trailbreaker’s stupid ass, the Quintessential Flying Fucks show up. Nightbeat’s not having it- he orders his team to take them down.

The Quintessential Flying Fucks are here for the wormhole as well, but they’ll be taking out the Autobots beforehand. While everyone else handles the Fucks, Nightbeat chases after Quantax, who just bolted for the temple.

Nightbeat catches up and tackles him to the ground, only to get himself pummeled for his efforts. As the blows rain down, Nightbeat tries to reason with Quantax that the wormhole is dangerous and shouldn’t be tampered with. Not sure why he thinks this would ever work, but alright.

Quantax, pal, do I have some friggin’ news for you.

Quantax pulls out of Nightbeat’s hold to hide in the shadows, only to jump out and slash him once he gets close enough.  

I hope nothing bad happens to Muzzle here. I feel like Nightbeat really would snap if that orb got broken.

Trying to buy some time, Nightbeat tells Quantax about the futility of trying to change the past, the future, simply because it’s all already laid out, and has been from the beginning. Quantax doesn’t take the jab well, jumping out at Nightbeat again and stabbing him in the stomach, spilling his guts. Nightbeat uses the slump of his body to topple the both of them into the hole in the floor.

Outside the temple, Centurion’s wondering just how the fuck he’s still alive. Jolup’s got him by the throat, his legs have gone AWOL, and he honestly just wants to go home at this point. Jolup’s about to drop the poor guy in a conveniently-placed pool of lava, when Optimus finally shows up.

He, Thundercracker, and Astrotrain- who I’d legitimately forgotten was in this novel- are all pointing their weapons at Jolup, and demand he put the cinnamon roll down and back away slowly. It’s a sweet gesture. Too bad Centurion’s already dead, though.

With a grand, villainous flourish, he drops Centurion into the lava, where he promptly explodes, then flies off for the temple. Astrotrain pursues, as Optimus orders Thundercracker to find Nightbeat and get back to the eighties.

Sevax is in the middle of a scrape with Hound, about to be shot to death. Looks like it’s all over for this son of a gun.

Or not. Man, there goes Rewind’s weird coworker ship. Too bad, he’d already written a huge chunk of his slowburn Ultra Magnus/Hound coffeeshop AU slashfic.

Jolup tells Sevax to slap a bandaid on it and get ready to go while he goes and grabs Ryknia.

Back inside the temple, Nightbeat is clinging to Quantax like his life depends on it- because it does. They’re both hanging off the edge of a hole that’s filled with molten lava. Quantax pulls himself up with his very strong arms, just in time to stand up and immediately be shot back into the pit. Nightbeat dares to dream a dream almost too beautiful- that Optimus is here to save him, like the romance novel protagonist he is!

No such luck. It’s just the Quintessential Flying Fucks. But how did they shoot Quantax? Didn’t he make that impossible? Good thing they dragged Trailbreaker along for the ride, and also good thing he’d managed to keep hold of his gun. Loopholes are fun.

The Fucks run for the wormhole, and all Nightbeat can think to do at this point is stand in front of it and hope for the best. Or maybe the least worst, in this case.

But… but the lore!

Nightbeat gets them with the device as they go through the portal, thus wiping everything from their brains and assumedly dooming them to a short, brutal loop for the rest of time. Thus the plight of the Quintessential Flying Fucks draws to a flaccid and confusing close. I had a feeling this might happen. I was hoping it wouldn’t, though.

Thundercracker soars through the wormhole next, and Nightbeat manages to hit him with the mindpurge just as he crosses the barrier. He’s not even sure if it’s working anymore at this point.

Then Optimus gets there, and it’s time to take him back. They hold hands, click their heels three times, say “there’s no place like home”, and step into 1984. Optimus stares at the collection of almost-dead robots on the Ark, not really feeling the scene, as Nightbeat blathers on. He offers to let Optimus keep his memories of 2013, so he can try and prevent his own death. Optimus… well…

And then he gives Nightbeat a gun and tells him to shoot him until he’s basically dead. Which he does, once the guy’s had the entirety of the last few days scrubbed out of his head. There’s an actual reason for this, though I won’t lie, I kinda freaked out a little when I first got to this part. In order for Aunty to reformat Optimus into his fresh new Earth bod, he needs to be injured enough for the scans to pick up. While this is happening, we also get an explanation for why the 1984 Decepticons got reformatted too- the mindpurge dropped and rolled under the counter while Nightbeat was busy murdering his celebrity crush, and wiped the entire history of the war out of the ship’s database. Now it didn’t see Autobots and Decepticons, but rather just a whole slew of injured robots. So if we want to end prejudice, what we need to do is mindwipe our cars and then shoot our dads in the chest. Gotcha.

And then Mount St. Hilary erupts. Time to go.

Back in 2013, Astrotrain’s been reduced to being transportation, as he always is, and the team’s watching the wormhole cook the atmosphere around it from a good fifty miles away. Fun fact, the curvature of the earth makes it so that we can’t see more than eight miles in any given direction from sea-level. Even though they’re holed up in a building right now and arguably above sea-level, I can’t help but wonder just how friggin’ big Cybertron must be for them to be able to see this right now.

Genocide’s over! Time to break out the booze.

Nightbeat’s taking his sweet time, but it isn’t for a lack of trying. He’s been dodging the repair beams, trying not to kick dead people in the head as he scrambles for the portal. He gets there eventually, the wormhole now running so hot he literally bursts into flames and his eyes melt out of his head as he passes through.  

There’s my macabre little man! Back to normal at last. All’s well that ends well!

The wormhole explodes as it shuts down behind him.

Hours after, things finally cool down enough for a rescue team to go try and find survivors.

Motherfuckin’-

NO.

NO, NIGHTBEAT, YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED.

That’s the end of Part Six.

[barnes-dameron]

Oops

*not my gif*

Poe Dameron x reader

Summary: When excitement gets the better of him, Poe accidentally walks in on you, who happened to be naked.

Word Count: 1.3k 

Poe ran through the corridors of the housing quarters of the base. Finn tripped and dropped his food at the cantina, causing Snap to slip and fall straight on his ass. The whole cantina erupted in laughter, and Poe couldn’t wait to tell you. He reached your door, entering the pass code, and eagerly waited for the door to slide open. 

When it finally opened, Poe slipped into your room quickly, but what he saw made him stop in his tracks. Everything that happened at the cantina earlier that day completely left Poe’s mind. He was a deer caught in headlights; his eyes widened, his mouth hung open, and blood rushed to his cheeks (and a little to his pants too). 

You stood there in front of Poe; a towel at your feet and nothing on your body. Your naked body was on display in the cool air of your room. Goosebumps spread throughout the surface of your skin as you felt yourself blush from utter embarrassment. 

Poe couldn’t take his gaze off of you. His eyes traveled all over your body, admiring the softness of your skin and curvature of your body. He didn’t realize that he was staring until you yelled at him to leave. And he didn’t even process what you commanded him to do until thirty seconds later. 

“Oh, um,” Poe tried to find the right words to say in this kind of situation. “Sorry.”

He rushed out of your room, and ran to his. He needed space to think, but he just couldn’t. Your naked body was branded into his brain. It didn’t make him mad, but he did feel guilty. Most guys probably would’ve felt lucky to see such a gorgeous woman naked before him, but Poe felt flat out guilty. 

He had feelings for you, no doubt. But now, he knew that he completely ruined something between you two. You probably hated him now, which he wouldn’t blame you for. You’re probably going to avoid him now, which he would be disappointed about. 

Poe pressed his head into the palm of his hands, squeezing his eyes shut. He needed to do something to make sure your friendship would be okay. 

It’s been days, and Poe’s guilt weighed heavier and heavier. He tried to talk to you, but you only gave him one worded answers and leave immediately afterwards. You even reverted your gaze from him when talking, which only broke Poe’s heart even more. 

He needed a way to make it up to you, but how do you make it up to someone when you accidentally seen them naked? 

It was then, that Poe was struck by a brilliant idea. He couldn’t make it up to you, but he could even out the playing fields. 

You didn’t want to see Poe after the incident. Every time you saw him, you remembered the utter embarrassment you felt on that day. After a long day from work, and a suggestion from the General herself, you wanted to relax and get away from the hustle of the Resistance. You took a nice hot shower, enjoying the way the water rolled off your skin and warmed your body. It was certainly relaxing and very serene. You returned to your room afterwards, your towel wrapped loosely around your wet body. What would make the day even better was pulling on your pajamas. It was then when you dropped the towel, figuring you could let your body air dry, that Poe barged into your room and stared at you. 

You felt utterly embarrassed to be seen naked by the guy you had feelings for. You couldn’t even see Poe the same way after that day, and he probably felt the same way. 

When he sent you the message to meet him in his room, you were a bit hesitant. But at some point you needed to face the music and bite the bullet. You stood before Poe’s door, your heart pounding against your rib cage. You entered in the code that he gave you to use, and waited for the door to open. 

When the metal door slid open, and you entered the room and saw something that took your breath away. Poe turned around, giving you a full naked frontal. You immediately averted your eyes, now finding his footlocker very interesting, more interesting than the handsome naked Resistance pilot in front of you. 

“Y/N,” Poe said. “Please look at me.”

“No,” you responded. “I-I’m fine.”

“Come on, Y/N,” Poe said, stepping closer to you. “It’s okay to look.”

“Why are you doing this?”

“Doing what?”

“This,” you said, gesturing to his naked figure as your other hand covered your eyes. “Why are you naked?” 

“Because,” Poe replied, placing his hands on his hips. “I need to level out the playing field.”

“What are you talking about?”

Poe sighed, standing in front of you, your eyes still covered with your hand. “I’m sorry for walking in on you the other day. I felt bad ever since, so this is my little way for making things up. So, go ahead and look at me as long as you like.”

“Poe,” you whimpered. “You really don’t have to do this.” 

“But I do,” Poe argued. “I want to talk to you like the way we did before. Ever since the incident, you couldn’t even meet my eye. I miss talking to you because I-”

You noticed the way Poe caught himself, cutting himself off short. You peeked through fingers to see his chocolate brown eyes. You took notice of the way his cheeks were a slight pink color and his usual smile faded away from his face. 

“Because what?” you asked, curiosity and hope rising in you. 

You heard Poe gulp, and saw his Adam’s apple bob a bit. 

“Because I have feelings for you,” he admitted. “And after the incident, I thought I ruined something that could’ve happened between us.”

It was Poe now that was averting his eyes away from you. You dropped your hand from your face, looking Poe square in the face. 

“But you didn’t ruin anything,” you said, causing Poe to meet your gaze. “I have feelings for you too, but I thought you would never want to see me again.”

“Why would think that?” Poe asked, stepping closer to you. 

“Because I thought things were awkward between us, and seeing me would only make things worse.”

“No,” Poe said, looking into your eyes with hope, a smile reappearing to his face. “You really have feelings for me?” 

“Yeah,” you replied, a smile of your own spreading across your face. “And you have feelings for me?” 

“Yeah,” he said before smashing his lips against your own. 

Your hands were on his back, feeling the muscles he built up there after all these years, as Poe pulled you closer to him. You couldn’t even kiss Poe properly; your smile broke the kiss every once and a while. Poe didn’t mind because he was doing the exact same thing. You both were relieved, the only thing that changed between you two was becoming more than friends. 

You would’ve continued to kiss him, but you felt something poking you. You pulled back from Poe, and quickly glanced down his torso before meeting his eyes. 

“You wanna take care of that?” you asked. 

Poe looked down, and looked back up at you. He quirked up an eyebrow, and gave you a cocky smirk. 

“I can,” Poe said, his voice a bit deeper and more seductive. “Wanna help me?” 

You gave Poe a teasing peck on the lips, before spinning on the balls of your feet. You began to make your way out of his room, leaving him in a bit of a helpless state.

“Buy me dinner first,” you retorted. 

“Saturday?”

“Yes.”