#like the whole . point. is that emotions play a big part of his judgements but he'll rationalize it all away

[cdroloisms]

also, dream's analytical abilities, his intelligence, his logical reasoning...are not all conclusions dependent on one thing. when people said that c!dream is a character that tends to make rational judgements and is a character that creates smart, logical plans and a character who feels that the end justifies the means, these are not judgements that were made based on one (1) plan that hadn't yet been fulfilled.

in the revolutionary war, c!dream was a logical character with several carefully constructed plans that utilized the enemy's overconfidence to their detriment in order to keep his side in the safest possible position while maintaining control over the fight the entire time, just look at the punz war videos. in manberg/pogtopia, c!dream aligns himself against schlatt at the beginning and does in fact carry that through until the end while at the same time managing to get himself the revive book that he learns about way later during that time period and secure it. when c!wilbur makes the plan to blow up l'manburg, c!dream takes action to ensure that it'll succeed by doing things like throw suspicion off of c!wilbur through the whole traitor nonsense and using a false surrender to keep the pogtopian's focus on him before the explosion. after november 16th, c!dream creates a plan to get the discs and successfully manages to carry it out. upon realizing the increasing tensions with new lmanburg had reached a point of no return, he circumvents their own secret plan to kill him and uses green festival, then doomsday, then staged finale to destroy nlm (which had shown itself to be a significant threat to more than just himself at that point, see the butcher army and technoblade's execution) and put himself and his allies and the revive book in technically safer positions by faking c!punz's betrayal and securing himself in a fortress with many, many mechanisms in place that were designed to keep people from easily being able to sneak in and attack him.

these are all plans, and these are all plans that show c!dream's "end justifies the mean" mindset, his ruthlessness to others and to himself, his logical reasoning and analytical abilities and how he uses those to navigate circumstances that are often, to him, unideal. which is why it can feel a bit...nitpicky? to go after the plan that we honestly know the LEAST about (the only information we have about c!Dream and c!Punz's research into the supernatural of the server comes from the genuine finale streams while they were literally monologuing at c!clingy, so forgive me if i'm taking everything said there with a heavy dash of salt) where their goals were also the hardest to carry out? like, they were trying to fix the entire supernatural system of this server. we don't know the depth of their research, we don't know how much of the supernatural system was even fixable, we don't know the mechanisms behind how death and limbo and "time travel" and XD and the end work, and honestly we didn't need to know. the point that was made about that plan wasn't that it was Technically Unfeasible.

but look at what we do know they figured out? they did figure out that there's some manner of a reset cycle controlled by the "god" of the server, considering their statements on the world "needing" to be reset and how the god of the server thought "this world might as well end." they did figure out that the end like, exists. they did figure out that the egg was also related to the whole mess with XD, they did figure out that there was an "imbalance" on the server that demanded more deaths/souls--and you know, all of these things are things we've been told in various other moments across the lore such as in the unreleased XD finale or XD's conversations with Foolish or the egg finale happening at the same time as the other finales, what have you. we don't know what the revive book is, after all this time, but we do know that c!Dream and c!Punz's research, whether it was entirely based on revival experimentation (which i HEAVILY doubt) or if they had more material that they looked into or hell if the revive book wasn't even just a revive book at all, did give them valid, real information on the supernatural side of this server. which indicates that they weren't just completely fruitlessly trying shit with the revive book in the naive hopes that their research "might" help them figure out how to achieve some random goals they had, but rather points to the fact that they had been successful in their research so far just based on what little we know? like, i just don't think that we personally know enough even on what the hell c!dream was hoping to accomplish with the supernatural plan, never mind on the actual supernatural system on this server or anything to do with XD to really make concrete judgements on how "good" and "logical" that whole plan was.

and again, i think the fact that the genuine finale 3 was a supernatural infodump that didn't particularly matter...was also kind of the point of genuine finale 3. i don't think it was ever really a priority for the audience to have the whole supernatural mumbo jumbo all figured out, because the heart of c!dream lied elsewhere. and hell even if c!dream's plan at the end of things was nonsensical and badly thought out and lacking purpose and illogical, then that still doesn't straight up Erase the entirety of his character as it was written before? that doesn't mean that c!Dream hasn't been a largely logically-driven character in the past, it would literally just mean that c!dream at that particular point is too unwell to act in the same manner as would be characteristic of him before.

to be honest, I think fandom exaggerating dream's analytical and intelligent abilities dream's plan is literally so stupid, like, many refer to it as "ignoring feelings for the sake of strict calculation, the end justifies the means blah blah blah a smart, logical plan that will nevertheless lead to psychological dissatisfaction", but the plan is literally the most ill-conceived thing I ever heard, like, that's not even a plan?? they're testing the revival book in hopes that one day it will somehow help them achieve immortality and restart the server - that's just ridiculous and I also have no idea how dream expects that restarting the server will solve his/their/servers problems, like how is that supposed to work? and this “if we are immortal, no one will have to suffer and we can live forever and know and blah blah blah” such naive crap, honestly I could ask a thousand probing questions or give a thousand reasons why this plan wouldn't work in any reality, and I doubt dream wouldn't have asked these questions in the months they've been running their tests; the plan is literally just his feelings: afraid to die → need immortality, lost everything and it's killing me → need a restart and so on - there's no analysis behind this shit

I literally find it strange not the fact that punz allows this, although the plan harms dream, but the fact that he really believes in this plan and follows it, like, come on, punz is +- fine, there is no trauma that can overshadow his ability to think, why is he indulging in this stupid idea?

strongly agree / agree / ambivalent / disagree / strongly disagree / don’t care whatsoever

I think you're conflating a bunch of things. Dream's plan is not the same as his methodology. His methodology is not the same as his motivations. Having emotional reasons for a plan is not the same thing as that plan being stupid. "lost everything and it's killing me → need a restart" isn't a description of a stupid plan, that's a description of an over-emotional motivation for a plan. Just because you disagree with what his goal was trying to achieve doesn't mean that the strategies he took to achieve that goal were stupid.

Like, take staged finale as an example. I can argue that it's overkill or a poorly considered goal to imprison himself in dangerous circumstances chiefly to achieve a) protecting his close ally b) getting the server off his back and c) getting a sick base. But I won't claim that the steps he took to set up and execute staged finale aren't evidence of someone successfully using strategic thinking to accomplish his goals, which is generally what people are talking about when invoking strategist!Dream.

Dream expecting that his plan will fix his emotional problems isn't stupid in that it's a failure of logic. It's stupid in that it's a failure in identifying that his problems are actually emotional. Which gets covered pretty handily in the genuine finale! Tommy didn't say "your plan is stupid because you neglected to consider these reasons that curing death won't actually work." Instead, Tommy said, "your plan is stupid because you're failing to see that you're hurting people here and now and you could have the friends you want here and now if you just put down your damn book and make peace." which, I'm gonna be honest, also sounds a bit like naive crap to me.

Also, you're acting as if his plan is based simply on an unspecified fear of death when all signs point to it literally being a reaction to the existence of the revival book! Like, sure, when you phrase it like "hur dur maybe this magic book will fix my problems" it sounds pretty stupid. But what actually happened was more along the lines of "permadeath didn't exist on this server as a concept, now it does. revival didn't exist on this server as a concept, now it does. maybe one of these can be used to fix the other." Which is pretty damn straightforward to my eyes!

I really, truly don't see what the problem is with "plan fix death" when you literally have a necromancy book. (Like, logistically, not ethically or whatever.) It seems like the supernatural complications with the balance of life and death, whatever XD's deal is, the server reset, Foolish and the experiments upsetting the balance, all of that, came later (and lacks its conclusion for doylist reasons). but WHY the complaint that fixing death doesn't make sense????? that's like. thing numero uno when you have a damn revival book. sorry if I'm getting carried away but I've seen this argument before and it genuinely makes no sense to me. Reads the same to me as "if you have a hammer and some wood and nails why are you trying to build a table." maybe because I have the tools for the job?

Not to mention that even if we pretended that Dream's only motivation was trying to stop conflict, the plan "learn how to revive people" is still a really obvious solution! Make conflict not have permanent consequences? that's like. an easy mitigating solution.

Also, there's a more general conflation happening here between Dream's unwellness and a more general notion of stupidity. Which I also disagree with. His paranoid spiral led to him locking himself in a prison, but that doesn't mean it was stupid for him to conclude he needed protection, and that his allies needed protection.

The thing with Punz is a separate question, but it's one that I think Punz has answered handily himself: Punz wants knowledge and power, he says so outright, in simple language. He's not indulging a stupid idea: he's in cahoots with a guy who's brought him a ton of knowledge and power. The revive book is real, it's got real results, and it's shown Punz a glimpse of a world he clearly thinks is achievable: a world in which the supernatural shit has indeed been solved. And I don't see why you think he's silly to believe so, given the evidence he's seen with his own eyes.

[seeminglyseph]

The whole point of Scott Pilgrim is that at the beginning of Scott Pilgrim vs The World he’s like a big freeloading manchild who strings along a teenage girl because he doesn’t have the emotional intelligence to have a real relationship or end one properly and ends up devastating her and causing her serious emotional harm because he’s a deeply selfish individual who takes advantage of his friends and anyone who will let him because he’s an avoidant and whiny loser who hasn’t grown up or learned to how to be decent person.

Throughout the comic series he faces various conflicts and challenges that force him to grow as a person and deal with the consequences of his actions and this makes him have to learn that he is technically a pretty shitty person who has done a lot of really shitty things to people, and as such it kinda makes him grow up and become a better person. He makes amends and is still not *great* but he like… has to get a job, has to realize his behaviour hurts people and has to take responsibility.

The new cartoon makes him face a version of that person who didn’t take those lessons as deeply to heart as he should have and just decided to blame everyone else and run away and lash out and it makes him realize what a deeply unpleasant and unlikeable person he is to be around hopefully helping him to grow too.

Scott is not supposed to be a good person at the beginning of his character arc. He’s pretty reprehensible. Honestly most of the characters in the series don’t like him save for the teenager who is too young to know better and the girl who has just met him and isn’t all that great herself. Because as the new series shows, Ramona has her own issues to work through. She treated her “league of evil exes” like trash and dumped them for some pretty shit reasons.

Part of the reason Ramona and Scott end up working out is that neither of them were particularly great people. She’s flaky and judgemental and hurts people, she’s bad at communication and she plays people against each other if it works out for her sometimes. She doesn’t like it when relationships get hard, and that’s how she can have 7 exes with such hard feelings they formed a league over it.

But judging people at the beginning of their character arc isn’t really fair because like. You don’t take your final exam on the first day of class. They do manage to learn and grow and get better at stuff. They make amends and learn and become better people over time. And that’s part of the human experience.

And that’s something I really like about the new anime because on top of everything all the characters get that chance, I love seeing the Evil Exes getting a chance to grow and get closure and development. Matthew Patel’s character development is maybe my favourite thing to watch. Look at him become a Beautiful Theatre Kid Butterfly. I love him.

[ilguna]

☼ cruel summer pt2 (Finnick Odair) ☼

summary; Finnick tricked you into playing the damsel role, something the Capitol will be referencing for the rest of your life. still, you're not sure if you can forgive him for being so cruel to you in the first place.

warnings; swearing, ehh gore, someone loses an eyeball, weapon use, death.

wc; 2.2k

part one

--

If you make it out of this arena alive, you might consider taking back all the nasty things you called Finnick that night on the balcony. In the heat of the moment, you confessed the feelings that you’ve had for him for a while, and in return, he told you that this had been his plan all along—to push you to your breaking point.

Every ounce of composure you had left was gone at that moment. All the emotions that you’d bottled for the last year shattered. You were upset, because this vulnerable moment had yet again, been turned into a joke for Finnick’s amusement. 

At least, that’s what you thought.

When you finally stopped screaming at him, which was right around the time the escort and Mags had come to check to make sure that everything was okay, he tried to explain his reasoning. You didn’t want to hear what he had to say, so you left to go to your room, which brought the conversation inside.

“You need to listen to me, (Y/n).” Finnick had told you, grabbing your arm to slow you down. “I know you’re mad—”

“Mad?” You repeated, your ladylike appearance was fading, not being able to hold it for the escort. Who was standing in the living room beside the stylists and Mags, watching the argument unfold. “Mad doesn’t even begin to scratch the surface, Finnick! This is one big joke to you! I’m going to die, and it’s going to be your fault!”

You made a beeline for your room, trying to lock the door behind you, but they won’t shut if there’s something in the way. It was Finnick, and he had himself firmly planted there, refusing to move.

“You know I would never get you killed.” He tried to tell you.

You scoffed, “Do I, Finnick? I wouldn’t have put it past you.”

“You can’t place all the blame on me, you’re supposed to be the smart one. I was waiting for you to figure out I was messing with you the entire time but you trusted my judgement. I hope you won’t be this naive in the Games.”

“Get out of my room.” 

“I wanted you to look like a ditz, to give you a better chance at winning.”

“You’ve got a really backwards way of thinking.”

“It’s worked for me in the past, so I figured that it’d help you, too.” His patience was unwavering. “I wanted the Capitol and the tributes to overlook you, and they are. It’s a blessing. You’re going to be invisible in the arena—it worked out for me, so it’ll work for you.”

You stared at him, still angry, gripping the white trim of the doorway. “And you didn’t think to let me in on this?”

“You would’ve slipped. It’s hard to genuinely act clueless.” He shakes his head. “I had to do it, (Y/n), or else the Capitol would’ve had their eye on you the whole time. This was the only way.”

“I have no skills.” You seethed through your teeth.

“That’s not true. You know how to use a spear and hunt for food. You just need to put that together, and you’ll be able to keep yourself alive. You don’t even have to kill unless you absolutely have to.” He raised his eyebrows. “Like I said, you’re smart, (Y/n). You’ve got this.”

“Is this why you stopped being friends with me? Back home?” 

Finnick shook his head. “I stopped being around you after my Games because I felt like we couldn’t connect anymore. I was somewhere else and you didn’t understand.”

“So you told all my secrets? You let them start rumors about me?”

He looked at the ground, quiet. “I never should have told them those things.”

“It’s too late to feel sorry for yourself.” You told him. “Or fix any of this. You better hope that you’re right about this strategy, or my blood will be on your hands.”

Finnick nodded, backing out of the door, satisfied that he’d gotten the chance to properly speak to you. “Goodnight.”

You punched the button on the wall. 

If Finnick’s plan doesn’t work out, it won’t matter, because you’ll be dead anyway. Still, you’ll spend every last breath cursing his name and actions, for getting you in this position.

As much as you hate to say it, you have to admit that his plan has worked without a single hiccup. He was right, down to the very last word. You don’t think that you crossed any of the other tributes’ minds, much less the very much, now-dead Careers.

It was easy, too easy to survive this far. There were several times you were sure that you’d get caught sneaking in and out of the Cornucopia for supplies. Or when you’d accidentally pass by an active camp, where you were merely just a few feet away from the deadliest tributes in the arena.

You never got caught though, you flew under the radar, and it’s brought you here.

The male tribute from District Eight stands a few feet away from you, knife in his hand. You can’t seem to remember his name, but you know that he’s older than you, on the cusp of being free of the Hunger Games forever. You won’t be able to place your finger on his age exactly, but if you had to guess, it’d be eighteen.

He’s panting heavily, a result of chasing you for two miles through palm trees and sand. You would’ve brought him through the river, too, if the Gamemakers hadn’t dried it up yesterday. Now all it acts as is a barren trench. He’d tried to corner you into going inside, but you knew better. If you’d fallen in, you would’ve died down there.

You didn’t survive this entire time just to be killed from doing something stupid.

“Come here, little girl.” He breathes, voice deep. He takes the first step toward you, your legs twitch, wanting to run. You don’t move. “I’ll try to make it quick.”

You tilt your head at him. 

In the past two and a half weeks you’ve been in here, you don’t think you’ve said a single word. A point you’ve been trying to make since you made a fool of yourself on stage with Caesar Flickerman. Which has been a little difficult to keep up, because you have a habit of working out your problems aloud. 

Your lips are sealed, as far as you’re concerned. And they’ll stay that way, until you’re announced as the victor. 

He’s making his way at you at a steady pace. The closer he gets, the more you’re able to see the deranged look in his eye. It makes you worry, but your focus lies with the knife that he’s white-knuckling. Your idea of getting it out of his hand somehow is becoming a bad one. 

You really have no choice. The Cornucopia is miles away. The only weapon you had is gone, thrown into the trench. What you have now is your backpack, which has close to nothing inside of it. Just the sleeping bag you stole, a half-empty bottle of water, and a coiled wire.

“Surprised you lasted this long.” He mutters, “What did you score, again? A three?”

Four. Which might have been done out of irony, because that’s where you’re from. Or pity, because the Gamemakers saw that you were making an effort to learn. With Finnick’s initial instructions to fail everything you touched, you had a hard time figuring out the right way to do things.

You weren’t allowed to succeed.

“What’s the matter?” He teases.

He’s gotten close enough to lunge at you, swiping with the knife. He cuts you across your upper left arm, leaving a stinging trail behind. In turn, you swing your fist at his jaw, an ache forms in your knuckles, pain blossoming under the skin.

You’ve never had to punch anyone before.

In the brief time you have, you try to seize the knife from his hand, but he’s already thought of that, lifting it up, out of your reach. As he prepares to stab downward, you wiggle out of the backpack, bringing it in front of you to act as a shield.

Sure enough, it pierces through the cloth, he draws it out. You lower the bag, backing up, shaking your head at him. You’re not going to be able to fight, and it’s not because you don’t want to, it’s because you’re not capable. You can punch and kick him all you want, but he’s going to bounce back.

You need a weapon, so you rip the backpack open, pulling out the bottle of water that's beginning to leak from being stabbed. You throw it at him, watching as he dodges it, breathing out a laugh. It wasn’t your goal to hit him, just slow him down another step.

Your hand dives back in, rooting around for the wire, which lays at the very bottom, practically untouched since you discovered it. Right as you go to pull it out, he swings at you again. You’re barely able to lift the bag in time, listening to it tear from the sharp blade.

Without thinking it through entirely, you retaliate, aiming for his legs. The wire slices into skin, he jumps away from you. One look at the damage you’ve caused, and you forget about defending yourself with the backpack. You have a ranged weapon. 

For once, you take a step forward, pursuing him. Each time he slashes, you dodge and attack. He doesn’t miss every time, sometimes catching your shirt or your skin. Either way, the advantage changes.

You hurl the backpack at him, still hanging onto a strap, watching as his focus turns to catching it before it knocks into him. With the other hand, you bring down the wire, coming into contact with his face. He lets out a hiss, right as you whip it forward again.

His sudden scream startles you, making you jump. You watch as he drops the knife in his hand, forgetting about it. His hands are trembling when he reaches to touch his face, his left eye, where blood is gushing out like a waterfall.

You don’t stare for long, jerking forward, falling into the grass to grab the knife before he realizes his mistake. His eye is squeezed shut, letting out pained sobs. You get back to your feet, arm drawing back, before you hammer the knife into his chest, right over where his heart is. 

His eye and mouth pop open at the same time, hands falling from his face to his chest, where he’s just able to secure his fingers around the knife. Then, his eyes roll back, taking his body with him.

A cannon blasts.

You shuffle forward a step, looking down at him, and then up at the sky. 

That’s it, right? That’s all you had to do? There’s no one left in the arena?

“Ladies and gentlemen, I am pleased to present the victor of the Sixty-sixth Hunger Games, District Four’s very own (Y/n) (L/n)!” Claudius Templesmith’s voice booms over the clearing, answering your questions.

You laugh, backing away from the gruesome scene you caused. “How’s that for a score of four?”

—

The familiar voices down the hallway grow louder with each step you take. They placed you in the room as far away as possible, to make you work to see your people again. In any other instance, you’re sure you’d be on some degree of irritation, but you’re so relieved to be here, and alive that it doesn’t seem right to be mad.

You survived the Hunger Games, there’s nothing in Panem that can touch you now. 

Your eyes are searching for them before you’ve even rounded the corner. Your stylist, your escort and Finnick are standing together, talking quietly. 

“Finnick.” His name leaves your mouth in a gasp, causing him to turn. Your feet move without permission, body gravitating to him. Finnick gives you a look—the look he used to give you back home when he thought you were being dramatic.

He throws his arms open at the last second, your body coming into hard contact with his, making him stumble back. He’s got you securely, though. Your arms lock around his back, squeezing him tightly. You can feel his cheek press against your ear.

“Welcome back.” He says.

You close your eyes, allowing yourself this moment, because you’ve missed being his friend. If there’s one good thing that will come of this, it’ll be getting him back. But it won’t happen before he shows you that he’s sorry.

When you pull away from the hug, his eyes flicker to yours, watching you. “This doesn’t mean you’re forgiven.”

“I know.” He sighs. “But it’s a start, isn’t it?”

You suck in your lips for a moment, nodding. “We’ll figure it out when we get home. For now, I just want to get out of here.” You tell him, before turning to the escort and the stylist, who are both smiling at you. You take in a breath, trying to reciprocate, “So, what’s next?”

[theghostbunnie]

Fuck it Mitchell ramble post bc I care about his character alot actually (cringe)

Originally played football later switched to baseball and is regarded as a jock type, though his main passion and hobby is being a guitarist. He writes and vocalizes songs but sees it as being just a part of getting to play guitar if he wants to do it entertainment wise, often rock/pop rock lyrics that don't go far into and generally lack emotional depth, in favor of being catchy. He loves the rockstar aesthetic mainly, and the old timey-esc gentleman one secondarily.

A big huge romantic, very flirty personality who prides himself on being attractive. Brimming with genuine self esteem he thinks highly of himself to the point where he can come across as egotistical, in actuality he doesn't outright think he's better than anybody , just has clear self love is all.

He's an older brother and incredibly family oriented who aligns more maternally in the nature of his behaviors alot of the time. For the majority of his life it was just him and his single father so he's always craved that big family vibe he never got.

He's supposed to have a caring/warm/comforting effect on people in alot of scenarios as well as effectively protective so he's physically big as well as literally usually high temperature and I've used the term "swallowed her/his frame in his embrace" to describe him hugging ppl bc they'll like disappear against him/in his jacket

and also the fact Mitchell takes up alot of space, is aware of it, and doesn't like it !! He's incredibly expressive in nature and talks with his hands but almost strictly keeps them right infront of him. He's also heavily expressive in the face, he prefers to not hurt feelings and stay in his manners but cannot have a poker face easily at all. He can only lie believably when the need/want to do so outweighs any guilt.

Has this thing where he doesn't want to hurt people and never wants to come across as violent or scary. I've described him feeling immense guilt in certain situations when he thinks he has and he gets the overwhelming desire to literally shrink himself down but can't. It's a pure insecurity not really based in any truth or any one past event.

Regulates his emotions very well, seemingly has this endless patience.

Mitch has things integral to the person he believes he is/wants to be. Attractiveness, helpfulness, comforting, being main ones. He'd much rather be a "simple" guy despite his dreams of fame, as in easy going and rather not particularly burdened by anything emotionally, very positive in attitude.

Additionally in being characterized as "simple/basic/normie" alot of his personal tastes reflect that, having very on the nose typical "average" preferences and not falling far outside the box of what's considered normal, he's nerotypical and charming and has functioned his whole life in the center of what's considered socially appealing.

He doesn't like to analyze his negative thoughts at all, much rather get them to go away. He doesn't even like to analyze himself that hard at all either, or his habits. He doesn't know why he needs to be helpful, strong, masculine it's just a role he wants to fill and prides himself on doing so.

He's completely unaware to all his flaws, as he's accidentally a little overbearing at times to his loved ones, even unintentionally patronizing in some circumstances, coming off condescending without meaning to. He wants to be helpful and even specifically has this good samaritan "look out for the little guy" mentality but to do so inherently has to make subconscious judgements on who's deemed a 'little guy' metaphorically or literally.

He likes to think of himself as a guy who has no toxic masculinity, and for the most part doesn't, but what he does have is deeply subconsciously internalized and only ever aimed at himself, a certain ideal he has to be.

On multiple levels he's judging himself on a different caliber than other people, holding things against himself he wouldn't for anybody else, holding himself to a different standard on a plethora of things.

As well as his fear of being scary he doesn't want to be perceived as weak either. To his idea of himself a damnaged or hurt person will never fit that, bad things happen to other people and it's his duty to help them as a friend, lover, whatever he may be to them. This isn't to say he thinks there's something shameful on a personal level to being a person who went through something bad, it just is to him. He's not being good enough if he can't get over it.

Has a fear if he ever does something extreme to give either the impression he's scary or wimpy that'll be how everyone present will veiw him from then on no matter what he's done or can do to fix that image before or after.

Despite having such heavy pride in general, especially in his looks and his ability to be charming/flirty and that having an effect on people, his pansexuality is not something he feels much connection to. He doesn't even view himself as a queer person just a "dude who happens to like dudes too" and experiences alot of comphet without ever realizing it and of course never addressing it

[jamiesfootball]

One of the things that’s been noodling in my head since the finale is how Ted Lasso plays the forgiveness card in regards to the Tartt Sr situation.

Yes, I’ve banged on this drum before. I shall bang on it again. Buh-dum.

Bear with me as I start from the outside and work my way in by first referencing a moment from a different show.

In Leverage, there’s an episode where they convince the guy they’re trying to take down to break out of police custody by making him think he’s in the middle of a deadly epidemic that’s being covered up by the government. The details of this aren’t important, but when Nate is explaining why it worked, he says something along the lines of ‘there’s a part of your brain that’s meant to question and make judgements. What we did was we tapped into the emotional center of his brain, so that he would forget to question anything.’

Now I'm paraphrasing, but this is actually a good summary of how a lot of cons work- they create an emotional story and a sense of relationship, to make you forget to ask ‘wait does this guy just want my money.’ Think of scary voicemails telling you your student loans got sent to collections and you need to call now. Think Nigerian Prince schemes. Think car dealerships.

Because that is the power of a story when the narrative structure follows all the guidelines. You become invested, and you believe the narrative. (This is also why Jump the Shark exists, when a narrative has wobbled so off its tracks that the belief becomes suspended, but I digress.)

So the issue for me with regards to the James Tartt Sr story line, is that from a technical standpoint the wider Story of Ted Lasso did meet the minimum requirements for ‘believable.' My coworker, for instance, absolutely loved how ALL the story lines tied up in the finale, including that one. She couldn’t explain why, she just said it was ‘really nice and it worked for her.’

But I’ll highlight that bit in the middle—she couldn’t explain why—because that’s the thrust of the situation. The Story, from her perspective, told a satisfying emotional conclusion by hitting all the correct points. It essentially did what a con does, and in the resulting emotion she failed to question it.

And I think therein lies the trouble with the Jamie's dad story line. Because it is being told within the scope of a broader narrative, it is allowed to coast on the merits of the rest of the narrative. For three seasons, the show preaches forgiveness and second chances and people having depth, so when it asks you to do it again at the end - with Jamie's dad, hell I'd even say with Rupert for a hot second - you already have within you all the emotional build-up to say 'yes.'

Except that the buildup doesn’t happen with James, or even Rupert, it happens to the people that they hurt. Jamie’s the one who learned how to be better. Jamie is the one who tried to make amends to the people he hurt. Jamie is the one who had to un-fuck his whole life. Jamie earned all of that emotional payoff.

His dad did not.

So the show sells you one emotional story, and at the end shuffles in another to reap the benefits of it.

But just like a con only works as long as you don’t start to question it, the second you question the James Tartt Sr storyline the more you realize how much of that work happened elsewhere in the story.

You know those youtube videos that are cut together scenes of ‘every time This Character talks about Big Plot Point’? Think of those videos. Sometimes they’re a concentrated dose of very high tense moments, but sometimes they’re a little anemic, aren’t they? Sometimes you watch those videos and realize just how much heavy lifting other scenes did just to imply that the narrative was moving forward.

Well if you made a youtube video of ‘all the scenes that mention / have James Tartt Sr in them’ and cut them together, you definitely do NOT get an emotionally satisfying ending. In fact you go from someone who implies that their father is violent, to seeing their father be violent, to seeing their father threaten violence to his kid, to seeing him inflict that violence on someone else in place of his kid, to the kid confiding in someone else that even more fucked up shit happened, to the kid’s mom trying to console him, to the kid literally showing symptoms of PTSD at the idea his father might be around-

-to someone asking him if maybe he should try to let that go

-to their dad being proud of them

-to reestablishing contact

-to a happy montage of them smiling together the end.

At bare minimum there is an entire confrontation missing. And that is minimum. Minimum narrative work said this storyline should have had a climax. But this is a storyline that did not breathe on its own- it relied on a dozen smaller, unrelated, moments to give it the illusion of a satisfying ending.

And since it was weaved in with the rest, to some people – people who were too in vested in the story to question it – that was a great ending. That was a perfect ending.

That’s the illusion of telling a story- people are predisposed to believing the story that is being told, to the point where they will forget to ask questions.

When people talk about this kind of narrative being a dangerous one? That’s where that comes from. That’s what it means. It’s not just that someone depicted a story of someone forgiving their abuser, it’s that the did it in such a way that that isn’t even what happened. Most of the time it is the narrative that forgives the abuser, not the character. The character doesn’t get to scream and cry and let out all the pain they suffered. The character doesn’t get to set boundaries and learn to experience the world safely. The character, often times, isn’t even worth an apology from the person who hurt them.

It isn't the character who gets closure in these narratives; it's the audience who does. And it’s so insidious that it can very nearly trick a person in real life into thinking that maybe they too will get closure if they forgive someone – without ever realizing that in these stories, the narrative was never on their side in the first place.

[occasionalincorrectquotes]

Rambling here about Death Parade because I don't think I should spam this one channel in a discord server Abt it

Death Parade spoiler warning

The fact that Decim cannot catch when people are lying about their feelings makes me insane. In the first episode we see he wasn't able to tell the fact that one of his customers were lying, but once Chiyuki had explained it he realized he did a bad judgement, causing someone innocent to fall into the void. The problem is also that she technically didn't lie about what she said, but she lied about all the emotions she'd shown him. And then fast forward to having to judge some murderers, he made sure that lying about their emotions will never happen again by making said customer act out their statement, it's not lying if you do it right?

When Chiyuki first fell into Quindecim she still retained her memory of death. Decim legit had no clue what to do with her, asking his superior how to deal with a situation like hers. Nona proceeds to offer to judge her herself, solving the problem swiftly and taking her off from Decim's (inexperienced) hands. Yet, Decim still wanted to judge her, maybe he saw how she lived a fulfilling life, only to have ended abruptly by herself. He wanted to know why humans did that, why not continue on? Nona considers this interesting, maybe it'll end up not what anyone expected, so she allows this. Decim ends up learning so much about the human experience, despite him literally having human emotions injected into him, he barely knows how to act like one. He's never lived, he doesn't know what it's like to having someone to cherish or to be cherished. Then right before she started disintegrating, he decided to expedite her judgement. Making her play a game, making her remember what happened. Yet, she is still the same old self, she doesn't feel threatened because she already knows what will happen. As a last ditch effort to see her "true" side, Decim puts her in a false reality, where she can see her mother mourning for her. Decim offers her a way out, to end it all and to return to her beautiful life, kill 1 of 7 billion people in the world, to bring her back. Chiyuki thinks about it, before realizing that just like her, anyone she killed would have someone that misses them, exactly like how her mom misses her. She gives up, she stops, but she still wants to go back, she still wants to tell her mom she misses her too. In a last ditch effort to remove her guilt of killing someone, she gives Decim the device, asking him to press it for her, to rip the band-aid off. At that point, Decim realizes that Chiyuki despite being so desperate, wanting so badly to return to the human realm, yet will not allow him to judge her properly, she doesn't want to kill someone, but she still wants to do it to save herself. There is action in her words (making Decim do it for her), there is desperation, yet, she doesn't do it herself. He breaks down knowing that this form of judgement can and will never be fair, breaking the illusion and revealing he just thought he needed to know her better to judge her better, but it never did. The best part about it was how Decim created the Chavvot puppets by hand, those weren't fabricated, those were real dolls he made by hand.

Maybe I watch too many theory videos, but they put a whole lot of emphasis on the Chavvot story. How people can express their feelings despite not using words (or using those words to hide their true feelings) I don't know how to parallels to how the arbiter system does things, but I just think it's too big part of the story to leave it at "Chiyuki childhood fav story" (it doesn't even have skating!! It's just some kids playing!!!)

Also the emphasis on the eyes in this series is insane, I feel like there's definitely something up with them, the way Clavis' eyes aren't visible, the way we always have to see Decim's eye up close to see when he receives memories. I don't know what they're doing with that, but 👍

Less serious and I don't really mind what people ship but Decim and Chiyuki are so best friends to me. Chiyuki would NEVER be into that weird ass guy, look at me in the eyes and tell me that Chiyuki could love a guy as dumb as Decim. You cannot (because I will not listen anyways)

[acatwithstockings]

I have to admit I am still obsessed with the shit script. (And no I don't have it, don't even ask, it appeared to me in a dream about university libraries)

And I am probably alone in this corner, partially because most people haven't read the full thing (understandably), partially because people emphasize certain parts too much and partially bc the fandom pretty unanimously agreed it has to be a certain way BUT script!Crowley isn't half the asshole people make them out to be. Just as script!Aziraphale isn't half that demsel in distress people like to paint them ass.

Yes the most commonly known interactions between the two, that are floating around and that most will have seen are grim to put it lightly BUT there are other parts of the script that can give you a whole different perspective of the characters.

Script!Crowley is an asshole sure, but he is also a character that works if you remember that he is a great a coward. Bro is squirming and bootlicking like a champion, putting up that facade of big bad 'i hate everything' demon while in actuality being a rather incompetent loser. The dialogue doesn't state it but he does care for his employees, to the point of having a show off moment throwing out a person, he as demon should whole heartily want to be there for all the bad they are causing, he even learned his employees names which you wouldn't expect from the persona he otherwise puts on. He even has a sweet moment with madam Tracy, offering her a birthday party and asking her to take care of the boy. So he does care he just would rather run away and hope for the consequences to never catch up to him than to state so openly. Also the one time script!crowley is drunk, he is incredibly docile and not at all like the asshat persona ... So there is that.

And for script! Aziraphale, well people sleep on how sassy this version probably could be if he had more 'screen time' outside of emergency situations. And what I mean by that is the first and the last interaction we get between Azi and Crowley is Azi sassing Crowley. Pointing out that's just like a demon to always be complaining and telling Crowley to not start this again when presented with an apple. Script!Aziraphale is not oblivious, he isn't naive or helpless, he simply chooses to not acknowledge the 'bad' parts (best example Crowley's cheating at checkers). But he also isn't above reminding Crowley about his inherent doomedness of him being a demon or striking a deal with a drunk Crowley while being sober himself. (In a sense script!Azi is exactly what some accuse tv!Azi to be).

In general Script!Crowley only gets nasty if stressed and inturn script!Aziraphale get hurt. Or does he really? (And yes this is just interpretation and since we don't have an acted out version you can interpret a lot into the script sooo uhm take this with as many grains of salt as you can) Again Aziraphale is of the opinion, that Crowley is inherently doomed, excuses his cheating with playing along and gives of the vibe of being at least slightly judgemental about Crowleys drinking habit. He is taking on the role of the Optimist in this version. An optimist that also cares unconditionally about Crowley. An optimist that calls someone giving their floor ice cream to another a good deed while also doing artwork authentication knowing that people just want to scam others. To me it reads more like someone who just knows how to push the other's button. Because without fail (well except the last time ) those emotional responses from Aziraphale lead to Crowley faltering and giving in and usually for Aziraphale to instantly switch moods after. And the one time it doesn't work, Aziraphale digs deep and pushes another button, even going so far as pointing out that he knew all along that Crowley only ever won because he was cheating. That is not a helpless naive damsel. That is an undercover bastard.

I could go on writing a full character analysis from that shit script bc hot damn I got more things to say BUT I won't. Also yes even if it ever got to the screen and with a few edits this version would probably just have been mediocre and I am happy we eventually got the TV show HOWEVER I have a soft spot for bad media, I love good omens and overanalyzing on 'screen' relationship and character dynamics is my hobby so it's just natural I got obsessed with it.

Also please for the love of someone, if there is someone out there at least slightly as obsessed with the shit script as I am, please, please, please get in touch. I have no one to talk about it otherwise pfff

[real-total-drama-takes]

i saw the "I want to see trenterra" ask and that just intrigued me so here's my immediate thoughts on how that cld even work.

Obviously they'd know each other before TDWT because Drama Brothers.

Because Trent's so into what the fans want (to the point where he's chill after they tie him to a bus), I can see him still being genuinely friendly to her even after she does some over-the-top stuff like breaking into their tourbus.

And I don't think Sierra's really had that many fulfilling relationships, she grew up in a house where her mother obsessed over Chris Mcclean, and that's very obviously had a large effect on her. It's mentioned at least once that she didn't really make friends in her childhood. I feel like she followed her mother's actions and turned to the parasocial in its place, forming a deep disconnect that spiralled out of control.

So yeah, having those first few strings of genuine could be good for Sierra in helping her recognise how unhealthy her behaviour is, and what she can do to be better. And Trent's a fairly good person for that, he's sincere, patient (especially in responding to really.. idk how to say it.. intense stuff? i.e. bus again), but still able to put his foot down. He'd be more readily able to sympathise with Sierra because he screwed up in Action in ways that are along similar lines.

And Sierra would be very open to his issues too, I can't see her immediately jumping to harsh judgement when his OCD causes him to act in ways she can't immediately understand, and I can see her as very happy to listen, which I think is something Trent needs a lot.

So yea they gradually develop to allow themselves to be fully open to each other, in a way they haven't really done with anyone else and then eventually they start dating boom trenterra

...okay the dating would actually probably take a fair bit of build-up, I think beforehand these two would be quite eager to jump into relationships due to idealism, but with their relationship shaking them up so much I think they'd kinda be hesitant. I can see Trent worrying he'll make the same mistakes with Gwen. I can see Sierra worrying if Trent truly likes her, or whether she's fallen back into bad habits and is fictionalising his emotions.

It'd be a kinda bizzare romantic relationship (definitely not fitting previous Trent's idealizations of what a romantic relationship should look like), of course they'd play into some of those romantic concepts, I think they're both very into that thing, big gestures, sappy romances, but ultimately the relationship is stable due to that openness and communication, the hidden part of the iceberg.

It probably ends after a few years after they develop enough in their external lives to realise that they no longer need the romantic relationship, and can just go back to friends.

ok after writing this whole thing i went from curious trenterra neutraller to mild trenterra liker. Heck, now i'd want to see Trenterra too.

.

[hyliareborn]

Ace Attorney mbti (not a complete list because I haven’t finished the last two games yet)

I made one of these for p5 characters, which I don’t think anybody but me is interested in, but this is tumblr. Why are we here, if not for self indulgence?

(Also I’m sorry there’s no Athena, Blackquill, tgaa characters, etc! I didn’t want this post to get too long, and I didn’t want to type characters without knowing their full story. Maybe I’ll make a part 2 with everyone I missed!)

Phoenix Wright: ENTP

Phoenix has ne all over the place. He’s famous in-game for throwing out a million different possibilities in court to see what sticks, which is what sets him apart—I mean, the truth is never straightforward, and Phoenix never settles for the most obvious answer. That said, he’s also very analytical and strategic. He knows that a lot of scenarios he’s suggesting make no logical sense, but it’s worth considering, and it buys him time to piece together what actually happened. It’s most obvious in aa4 during his disbarment, how he can block off his emotions to make harsh, rational judgements, and doesn’t seem to consider how that affects Apollo. I get thinking that he could be an ENFP, given how much he cares about the human aspect of these cases and how strongly he stands by his morals, but thinkers care about people too! And the contrast between those types is clear next to…

Maya Fey: ENFP

Maya and Phoenix bounce their ne off of each other, which is why they work so well as a team. However, Maya doesn’t really care if anything she comes up with is plausible as long as it’s fun, which drives Phoenix crazy sometimes (he’s a thinker, everything has to MAKE SENSE). This isn’t to say that Maya is stupid! She’s brilliant, she just approaches things from a creative and emotional standpoint first (Will Powers can’t be the killer, he’s too nice! The Steel Samurai would never! I don’t have proof, I just FEEL IT. No Nick, I don’t care if the evidence points to him!)

Miles Edgeworth: INTJ or ISTJ, but I lean toward INTJ

Miles and Phoenix get on each others’ nerves partly because Phoenix will entertain any idea and Miles has tunnel vision. He comes to a conclusion and refuses to budge, then gathers (or fabricates) evidence to support what he’s already decided. I understand an argument for ISTJ given how he usually seems firmly grounded in reality, but I think that comes from te. Because ISTJ would require ne, which I just…can’t see at all, even as his inferior function. I haven’t had the chance to play the investigation games yet, but from what I understand, we see him find the underlying essence of the situation and piece together the most likely outcome based on what he can prove. He also says that he isn’t one for sentimentality, preferring to focus on the future, and that people can miss the truth entirely by only trusting what they see in front of them.

Apollo Justice: ISTJ

Apollo is the ISTJ poster child. His ability is literally si; close observation and gathering details to compare them to what he already knows to be true. His te wants structure in his life and his work (he’s surrounded by ne-doms though, so good luck 😵‍💫) and he likes playing by pre-established rules, so Phoenix’s whole ne/ti thing frustrates him sometimes, particularly in aa4 where he’s annoyed that Phoenix won’t be straightforward or use conventional methods to prove his innocence. He needs help seeing the big picture, but he gets there because of …

Trucy Wright: ENTP

She’s so much like her dad!! I won’t get too in depth with her because almost everything I said about Phoenix applies to her, too. Again, I see an argument for ENFP, but she’s a lot more analytical than people give her credit for, and she can detach from emotion much more easily than an ENFP. The murder of her father and the accusation of her uncle is obviously difficult for her, but she isn’t concerned in the moment with how the outcome will make her feel, and she doesn’t linger on how any of her family drama has impacted her. She’d rather take care of others’ emotional wellbeing and she sometimes feels responsible for them, which is tert-fe.

Klavier Gavin: ENFJ

BIG fe-dom. He connects with people so easily, he cares a lot about his image, he switches his stance on a case based on what will have the most positive impact on everyone involved. He was able to be manipulated by Kristoph because his brother’s approval was so important to him. But he always had a nagging feeling that what he did to Phoenix was wrong and that Kristoph couldn’t be trusted, because something just felt off. His tert-se shows in him gladly playing the role of the impulsive, artsy rock star archetype, which is clearly a genuine part of who he is, but he has much more foresight than an se-dom usually would.

[itsalltoobeautiful]

Whitney figured that he wouldn’t want to talk in-depth about his brothers, especially knowing this new information— it was a soft spot already, so she could only imagine what it was like now. The look on his face tugged at her heart, knowing he must be feeling so many different emotions being here and being able to see the junkyard; even though she had a handful of fond memories there, they were all because of Rachel. The teasing of his brothers when she was first starting to come around- classic sibling banter. And riding in the pickup truck he technically (and legally) shouldn’t have been driving… but when, or if, he wanted to talk more about it- she’d be there for him. Her eyes filled with that warmth and she gave him a sympathetic smile, hoping he knew that she would leave him space to not talk more about it.

Those chocolate eyes found his own watching her fidget; he did know. He did remember her little tics and mechanisms- her gaze followed the sight of his face as he debated on what to say to her offer; and it was her turn to observe. Whitney knew that it could be an awkward thing to consider, for obvious reasons, so there was no judgement for any hesitation he might’ve had— but she was serious. If he wanted, he would have a place to stay.

Whitney’s eyes softened as Rachel spoke. “I uh, I understand- but they actually asked me about you, figuring that you would be here today too, y’know- and they wanted me to send their regards; they told me how you would be so sweet and helpful to them after I left..” Her smile grew to a certain fondness that was only reserved for him- and the memories she had filling her head after they parted. And as her old best friend leaned toward accepting her offer, the brunette couldn’t help the splitting grin from growing upon her lips stained with a deep red for her attire tonight. They could talk, catch up.. just be in each other’s presence again, in these new grown forms. It all felt so surreal- and suddenly, Whit felt strange for smiling so big while attending their old friend’s viewing..

She nodded quickly, the fidgeting only stopping for a moment as she tried to rein in her genuine excitement; this was a lot, and she was sure Rachel was trying to process everything one step at a time, so she didn’t want to overwhelm him—

“Yeah, it’ll be absolutely fine with them- it’ll uh.. it’ll be just like old times,” That smile didn’t falter as she herself processed a very specific detail that he’d mentioned; a very important one at that. Whitney’s heart skipped a beat— there was no way… no way that the universe played this game with them. At least, that’s what it felt like at this point.

“Whoa whoa… Rach, you- you live in LA?..” She spoke in utter disbelief, her eyes boring into his as a little smirk pulled at her lips. “You’re kidding.. Rachel I moved to LA last year. I was in San Francisco, but relocated for more work and, y’know, more opportunities.. are you telling me that we’ve lived in the same city for a year now, without knowing..?” A chuckle fell from her parted lips, just absolutely in shock. It was all too much- from how things ended with them during senior year, spending a good few years no longer in each other’s lives as she traveled across the country to get a jumpstart into pursuing her writing career.. only to end up in the same place again. Maybe we’re always meant to find each other… She thought.

Suddenly, the girl caught a moving group out of the corner of her eye- their old friend group, talking as normal, yet most of them had their attention focusing back and forth on her and Rach.. which only made Whit chuckle.

“…they’ve been watching us this whole time, haven’t they..”

— @heartxshaped-bruises

Some things just never changed; along with his general mannerisms, Whitney picked up on Rachel’s ticks with ease— he was anxious, or at least unsure of this, of being around her for the first time in years. She couldn’t blame him, of course- he couldn’t see or hear how hard her heart was beating, from the second her eyes met his presence, or somehow, maybe he could. The writer was convinced that something somewhere out there brought them together back in middle school— but she also had her own ticks and giveaways that she couldn’t help but wonder… did he still know? Could Rachel still pick up on how she might be feeling? From childhood, her multitude of rings served as a fidgeting haven; but also at times a tell tale of her anxiety as well.

She couldn’t help but wonder if he’d thought about the possibility of their reunion in the future like she had— granted, Vince’s passing was not what was planned to bring them to said reunion. But Whit always wondered what it would be like to see Rachel again; what he would look like, how he would react to seeing her.. it was all so much. There were days and days that went by where she thought about trying to reach him somehow- to check in on him, see how he was. There was, and absolutely always would be, a reserved space for him in her heart.

“Oh, gosh… I’m.. I’m sorry to hear that, Rach-“ She mused with a slight grimace at the mention of Rafe’s current situation. “But- yeah, I will. I’ll let them know I got to see you,” The sweet smile started to show through once again, Whit’s eyes not straying from him for a second— he seemed far away, and she knew what he was looking at. It was a lot to be back in town- in a way, she was glad she hadn’t the chance to process everything quite yet; or that far-away look would no doubt creep into her own chocolate eyes.

“You know-“ There it was, the fiddling with rings in one hand, the other pushing strands of hair away from her face. “I know it’s.. y’know, been a while and.. but- I’m sure if you did want to stay, my parents would be happy to make up one of the rooms for you,”

Whitney knew it was a lot. Emotionally, just… a lot. On top of everything else. But she couldn’t help but offer— and it was true, she was sure her parents would be delighted to see him again. They took him in all the time when they were growing up, hell- they’d make space for him now.

“I know that’s.. I’m sorry if that’s weird, but- I just wanted to throw it out there. If you wanted to stay, of course- but.. y’know I could also help pitch in for a hotel room for the night, but-“ stop rambling, Whit. “-either way, I’ll let them know you said hello,” Even though somehow her heart made more dangerous ‘thud’s against her chest, that warm smile she’d give him never faltered. It shined with her next question, as she was genuinely curious and wanted to know:

“But hey- how are you doing? Outside of this, y’know- what have you been up to?”

[cycas]

Hello, Cycas! I wanted to ask you about the specific character voice of Maglor. I reread RtA and Quenta Narquelion to do some analysis of the way Maglor construct sentences and which words he uses. I still struggle with him a little bit, I'm missing some piece in the puzzle. I would be grateful if you can tell me more about the way you write Maglor and what character points to not miss?

What I learn about Maglor's speech patterns is the interesting contrast of flowery and lively speech, not being very blunt and dance around topics, but then suddenly being alarmingly blunt and to the point the second later. He is very eloquent and I noticed he is maybe persuasive without the intention to be sometimes? Always in control of every conversation and the way he is perceived by people even in daily life. My problem is I just.. have problem to write him like that and I would really appreciate some tips.

I would also appreciate if you can link me to some good books or essays on the matter of medieval kingship. Useful for the writing of noldorin politics. Thank you very much!

I finally got to answer this, terribly late, sorry. Very flattered to be asked!

I try to write Maglor as someone who enjoys language, and is sometimes a little playful about using it. Both he and Maedhros have a tendency to longer, more complex sentences and are perhaps more likely to use a scattering of Latinate words than many of my characters (particularly Nimloth, who is much more direct.)

But Maglor is more concerned with the sound and rhythm of words, while Maedhros is more likely to be obscure and elliptical when speaking. (Of course, really, they aren't speaking English, but, well, call it a translation convention.)

So on the whole, Maglor says what he means, using words that have a pleasant shape and rhythm. He's very good at that, so one thing he does, as you mentioned, is deliberately vary his sentences length for impact.

But he is also a procrastinator who prefers to avoid unpleasant truths. Such as: we are going to lose this war. Such as, just giving up and going home will go horribly wrong. Such as: you need Fingolfin's help so ffs, ask. (Maedhros faces unpleasant truths head-on, which is one of many reasons that Maglor used to prefer to leave big decisions to him.)

So when he is finally forced to face a situation he would have preferred to weasel out of (for example: the Oath really is still binding, or Elrond and Celebrimbor are in danger, etc) he's often a bit more staccato, because he's uncomfortable and dealing with emotions that he's definitely not going to explain to anyone.

But at the same time, like all of Feanor's sons, he can make a speech at the drop of a hat if he really has to. He has the ability to put on his princely mantle and play the part, the way Celegorm and Curufin did in Nargothrond. When Maglor does this, he does it expertly. Feanor's sons generally do things expertly, of course, and Maglor is an expert in language, and in manipulating emotion with language by telling stories.

So yes, sometimes he finds that he's swaying the people he is talking to with his words, even when he knows that's a perilous path to walk and is genuinely trying to dial things back. His default register, I suppose, is Teller of the Tale, and that is a role that is intrinsically manipulative of emotion and opinion. And controlling that is quite difficult because all of that family grew up using all their many talents as often and as hard as they could. They are not used to restraint. I think this is one of the many things that draws him to Elrond,Finrod and Fingon. Apart from shared history, they are genuinely friends because these are people that Maglor cannot accidentally push around, because they are more than capable of seeing what he is doing, not being impressed, and pushing back harder. After the First Age, Maglor finds that reassuring. He is aware that his own judgement has sometimes led him terrible consequences that he regrets, and he doesn't trust himself: even worse, he can't trust Maedhros or Feanor any more either, and that is really difficult for him.

A younger and more competitive Maglor would be much more irritated by Fingon and Finrod, I suspect, but of course he didn't know Elrond then. I think he gets on much better with reborn Fingon and Finrod than he did when they were children. As to medieval kingship, that's... a big question! And I don't know if I can answer it because I tend to feed in stuff from my long-ago history degree which probably has been superceded and also I can't remember where I read things anyway. But my emphasis tends to be early medieval European- what is often called the Dark Ages - rather than late medieval. Rosamond Mckitterick,J. M. Wallace-Hadrill, and Janet Nelson are relevant historians, maybe also Brian Ward-Perkins on the Fall of Rome. I like Nelson's book on Charles the Bald, but I'm not sure how much fun it would be to read just for fanfic!

But my ideas about Maglor as a leader and his characterisation are also particularly influenced by a couple of novels (neither of them, strictly, medieval!) : Island of Ghosts, by Gillian Bradshaw, and Sword at Sunset by Rosemary Sutcliff, and I can definitely recommend those as fun to read.

Thank you for the ask, it was a lot of fun to answer, and I hope it made some kind of sense even if rather late.

[deardragonbook]

The reason to kill off a character

So, before going to the actual advice I just want to say, thank you so much for all the attention that my post on making a character death heartbreaking got! That post actually got reposted on Instagram by an account much bigger than me (they credited me so that’s actually really cool!) not sure if that’s where you all came from or just a coincidence, but I’m happy you’re here. 

Now, that repost on Instagram got a lot of attention and among all the comments something I did see a bit off, was people asking why authors do this, so I thought for today it’d be cool to actually go over some of those reasons. 

1.- The first and most obvious is tension management. In a story tension depends on the existence of the possibility of failure, in a lot of genres this could mean a couple not getting together, the protagonist not getting the job they want or a villain winning. In fantasy, we often find ourselves in life or death situations, and if character’s never die, life or death situations completely lose that tension. This is especially true with longer series with several books. 

So sometimes, as saddening as it may be, you have to make the choice to sacrifice a character for tension sake. But why put in an effort o make it as sad as possible? Well, by making the death an impactful one, you can get away with killing less characters. 

A good example of this is actually Harry Potter, everyone says loads of character’s die in Harry Potter, but that’s not entirely true, loads of characters die in the final book, so for the sake of this example, pretend the final book doesn’t exist please, thank you. Up until the the Half Blood Prince, there are only THREE important character deaths! Cedric, Sirius and Dumbledore (I obviously am not counting minor characters, mentions of muggles dying, ghosts, Harry’s parents, although I was tempted to throw Aragog into here). That’s not many deaths for six books. But they were all hard hitting impactful deaths, that carried the tension with only one character sacrificed for the sake of many. 

So as a writer, remember it’s quality and not quantity. 

2.- Character arcs and development. There’s two sides to this: 

2.a.- Vengeance and mourning can be very powerful character motivations, they can make someone switch very quick. You got a character that always plays by the rules, always cautious and careful, kill of their friend, their family and watch how emotion can blind their judgement. They can switch sides, they can switch methods, they can change goals and form an entire new side! Everybody reacts different to grief, and you do need to be very cautious with this, lots of people have done this wrong, but so many have done this right! 

Everyone talks about redemption arcs, love to see it, but a hero gone villain can be just as good when done correctly! 

2.b.- Smaller changes. Some people don’t react suddenly, some people handle death surprisingly well, but someone close to you dying is something that will always be with you, and affect you. I think a good example of smaller changes, is when you have a say a team, and one of the members die and the remaining members have to take on the responsibilities that this person had. 

If the person who died was, say, the one giving motivational speeches before each battle, when the next battle comes and there is silence, it’s very likely a different character will take up that responsibility, showing a side of them we hadn’t seen before. 

3.- Plot reason. When I think of character’s dying over the plot, I usually think dead parents who died before the book even begins. You know, every Disney parent ever. But other examples could be villains who die or a king who dies leaving his son/daughter/next in line to rule. I don’t think it’s as important that these be sad, it depends very much on the character and on the author’s intent. 

This is probably the area where personally I use the connection card, especially if the death happens before the book begins, it’s not sad per say, but you might feel empathy towards the character’s left behind and their soft words of remembrance. 

4.- Just, emotions. The whole point of writing is to tell a story, the whole point of stories is to make us feel things. And a happy ending is only amplified by the struggles that got us there. A character dying for something they believe it can be heartbreaking in the moment sad, but when that thing they believed in comes to fruition, the fact so many gave so much to get it, makes it feel so much more important! 

Anyway, so those are my big four reasons to kill characters off. There are probably loads more reason out there, maybe you’re just writing angst, maybe you’re writing Game of Thrones, maybe you just created far too many character’s and it’s time to clean up! No judgement here, but I hope this helps newer authors who don’t entirely understand the reasons behind these decisions. 

I recently created a link tree so check that out for all my socials and my book! 

Some upcoming posts I have in the drafts are: 

Things that make character deaths heartbreaking (part 2) 

Relationship drama without the constant arguing 

How I do Timelines 

How I do Fantasy Maps 

So if any of that sounds interesting feel free to follow! I also have asks open if you want help with any specific aspects! I’m always happy to help! 

[volleychumps]

Can I request a scenario where seijoh has a first year manager and kyoutani lashes out at her, making her cry

SKAJKJDSAKJS *ahem* yes

Seijoh w/ a Manager That Cries bc of Kyoutani 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Y/N, please?” 

“Oikawa, I said no.”

“Yeah. She said no.” 

“Shut up! I heard her the first time!” The setter glares at a chuckling Hanamaki before visibly wilting with a pout, making you giggle at the imitation Mattsun delivers behind him. 

“Why not?” Oikawa attempts again, prompting Iwaizumi to deliver a well-deserved smack upside the brunette’s head, causing him to whine something about continued abuse as you sigh, setting your clipboard down to attempt to gain a hold on things. 

“Y/N doesn’t want to go on a shitty date with you, you piece of trash.” 

“I second that.” 

“I’m your senior, Kunimi-kun!” 

“Is that...the wind I hear Kindaichi?” 

The first year blinks once in utter confusion before beginning to ask what the hell Kunimi meant, causing you to clap your hands together once to handle the chaos, successfully managing to silence the whole Aoba Joshai team efficiently.  

The third years (minus Oikawa) share a knowing smirk, impressed a first-year like you was so capable of handling a group of this demeanor. 

“You guys are cute, but stop goofing off and focus on your practice!” You cross your arms, frowning as Oikawa grins at the term cute, prompting the other third years to trip him as he jogs back to the court. “We have prelims coming up soon, so you guys need to be at your best!” 

“No need to yell, you baby.” Matsukawa taps your head in passing as Kindaichi flashes you a thumbs up, causing you to smile warmly as Oikawa flashes you a wink. 

“Hai~ Y/N-chan!” 

“Your faux crush on her is the lamest thing on earth.” 

“Like you don’t, Iwa-chan. And it is so not faux!” 

“Stop saying shitty things.” 

You smile a bit when they all seem to listen to you, bickering nonetheless before nervously shifting when a single one doesn’t. 

Kentaro Kyoutani was the hardest to get through to ever since he had been recruited, simply ignoring the others and turning down team get-togethers at every opportunity. The boy was skilled, no doubt about it, but still seemed to hold a dangerous edge to him that was evident in his playing skills. 

“Kyotani-Kun?” You swallow your nervousness as you approach him, shifting your hair to the side as the rugged boy simply glances at you once before going back to staring at his laces. “Are you gonna practice?” 

You flinch when he whips his head towards you before clicking his tongue, taking a slow-paced walk towards the gym. 

“Don’t tell me what to do.” 

With those sweet parting words, the spiker huffs once more in a way you almost thought was child-like, before you find yourself facing his back. 

Another big factor about you was you were a tad bit sensitive, meaning when anyone as much raised their voice at you, you found yourself on the verge of tears. When the boys at the last tournament were a little too pushy in getting your number, resorting to grabbing you by the wrist, you yelped a little too loudly- causing your Seijoh boys to step in to the situation accompanied by the cracking of their knuckles. 

You curse the growing lump in your throat before swallowing it down, taking your position to observe the practice. 

“Makki!” 

You grin a little bit as your team’s star setter hits a perfect set to his third-year friend, already forgetting about the previous events before- 

the collision seemed to happen slowly, your hands instinctively grabbing the first aid kit that held multiple ice packs as you rush towards the scene. 

The clipboard falls to the ground as your shoes find themselves in front of a groaning Makki, moving next to be in front of a growling Kyotani who seemed to have a large bruise growing on his calve from the fall. Shakily, you reach an arm out to lightly touch his shoulder as you see from your peripheral vision Mattsun and Oikawa aiding Hanamaki. 

“A-Are you alright...?” 

“Will you just leave me the fuck alone and flirt with all the goddamn team members like you usually do?” 

Your eyes widen. 

“You’re just here because you need a school activity right?” He continues, dark eyes glaring into you judgementally as your hand slackens back, arm falling at your side. “So what, just because you get to stare at guys all day you’re suddenly the boss of us? Give me a fucking break.” 

The silence that settled around the gym was so heavy you felt odd at how quiet the boys were. 

You’re the first to move, kneeling down slowly before opening the first aid kid, carefully placing an ice pack by his side a safe-distance away to where he could still reach it, seeing Oikawa reach a hesitant hand out to you from your now blurred vision as you stand to your feet. 

“Y/N...” 

“Iwa.” 

You turn, fighting the quiver in your shoulders and crack in your voice as the heat floods your eyes and down your cheeks before you can stop it. 

“U-Um...Carry on practice, will you? I’ve got to go to the bathroom...” 

Embarrassed and flustered, you wipe at your eyes as you feel everyone watching you pick up the pace to get out of there sooner, leaving the Seijoh team facing silence once again. 

Kyoutani scoffs at your retreat, not being able to hide the surprise in his features when the one man he respected suddenly had his practice shirt in his fist, pulling him towards his pissed-off expression to lessen the proximity. 

“What the actual hell is wrong with you?” Iwaizumi’s voice was genuinely questioning with an edge that seemed to promise death, scarily quiet to the point where Kyoutani felt a shiver. 

“Y/N hasn’t done you wrong in any way, has she?” Mattsun crosses his arms, obviously irritated as Hanamaki clenches his teeth at the way Kyoutani rolls his eyes, refusing to answer. 

“First you mess up the set- and now you go and make our manager cry? You must be real fun at parties.” Kunimi, surprisingly, scoffs as amusement and irritation twinkles in his usually bored eyes, knowing damn well Kyotani wouldn’t do anything to him with the third years around. 

“Listen.” Iwa growls as Oikawa jogs off in your direction to go find you. “I don’t give a shit if you’re on your period or what, but newsflash: We’re a team. A team that’s lucky to even have a manager like Y/N- so the next time you call her a slut in front of any of us?” 

Kyotani glances at the icepack, furrowing his brows. 

“I won’t hesitate to get the coach to keep you on the bench all season. Don’t forget that.” 

Iwa releases the tightened material, standing up before moving his voice to a volume to speak to the whole team. 

“Practice is almost over anyway. Be here tomorrow morning.” 

Kyotani growls, the growing pain in his calve becoming unnoticeable as the sound of multiple sneakers jogging past him sound, signalling the rest of the team were leaving the gym with him by his lonesome- 

a melting ice pack now in a gripped hand as a foreign emotion swirls around in the spiker’s stomach.

-------------------------------------------

“I’m not crying!” 

“You’re totally crying.” 

Iwa swats Oikawa for the second time that day, causing the brunette to groan as Matsukawa taps on the women’s bathroom door, Hanamaki leaning on the wall next to it. After instructing the underclassmen to head home to let them handle this, you now had four tall, scary-looking dudes (again, minus Oikawa) outside the women’s bathroom waiting for you. 

“Will you all just go home?” You groan through the door, dabbing at your now puffy eyes with cold water as you hear Iwaizumi audibly sigh. 

“Come out so we can at least make sure you’re okay.” Hanamaki calls through the door as you lean your back against the door, not wanting them to see you like this. 

“I’m fine. Thank you all for caring.” you respond softly, tapping your head back against the door. “Maybe this manager position isn’t for me.” 

“What?! You’re gonna let some little punk tell you what you should and shouldn’t be doing?” Mattsun exclaims, irritation evident in his voice at the thought of you giving up as you sigh, opening up the door as you manage a smile at the relief that floods their faces. 

“I don’t know. I shouldn’t...but what if he’s right?”

“I’m not.” 

You flinch at the voice, eyes widening as Iwa and Hanamaki simutaneously take a step in front of you as Kyotani takes limping steps towards the five of you. 

“No. Um...” You push them apart, surprising the both of them as you step through. “Let him speak.” 

“..............sorry.” 

“Wow. Give him a standing ovation, everyone.” 

Oikawa flinches, hiding behind you at the raise of Iwa’s hand as you find yourself smiling gently at the way Kyotani was looking everywhere else but you, your smile widening at the gripped and dripping ice pack in his hold. 

“I...” Kyotani coughs, embarrassment flooding his cheeks. “I shouldn’t have said those things. Sorry. I hurt my leg.” 

Despite the simplicity of his words, a beam spread across your face before you look down at said leg. 

“Will you let me wrap it for you?” 

Kyotani relaxes a little as you approach him, nodding once as the third-years smirk at the fact that you were beginning to have the newcomer as whipped for you as the rest of them were. 

“See you guys at practice tomorrow?” You ask with a now bright grin, supporting Kyotani with his arm wrapped around his shoulder as you turn towards the direction of the infirmirary. 

“Sure you don’t need us to come?” 

“He’s not dangerous.” You roll your eyes, causing Kyotani’s eyes to widen a fraction at your words before Oikawa’s groan sounds throughout the hall. 

“Does this mean even more competition?!” 

“You really are a piece of shit.” 

[worfs-fabulous-hair]

Series I'm currently on : TOS

Episodes watched: 01x11 - 01x12

Episode names: The Menagerie , part 1 and 2

Thoughts:

Pike's in an iron lung.

Spock telling Pike who can not say anything other then yes or no through light blinks that he's going to do something illegal and then dipping

At this point I should keep a count of how many times star trek says " well now start looking into the impossible "

Spock is really bad at sneaking around but thankfully star fleet officers are really bad at paying attention

I wish I could say that I'm surprised people blindly trust Spock like that but like it's not really that surprising

He kidnapped a sick man from the ICU and a whole ship of people

Extremely slow space police chase

That's the calmest I've seen anyone be arrested on this show

Spock made a ship override that no one can undo so their still going to the forbidden planet

" no ship has that good survalence footage " " ah well you see I make extremely detailed documentaries of my life in my free time sir , I'm always recording "

That's not what was said , he won't explain the star trek episode in the star trek episode

I didn't realize it the first time but their drinking alcohol out of beakers

Also I'm surprised no one has pointed out that this whole conversation with the doctor is irrelevant to what happened on Talos IV

Pike's having the time of his life sitting in on this trial

So like half of the episode is just the pilot playing again but it's apparently being sent to the ship from the big brain bois

Spock just used puppy dog eyes on Kirk

I'm going to watch the next episode while cooking so there probably won't be much that I'll say.

Part two

" I'm guilty just lock me up already yo"

Everyone is watching this and then going like good job pike your so smart

Captain Pike through all of this :😮 ( I'll take a picture if they show it again )

Everyone starring at pike judgementally for being attracted to the the same lady but green

The starfleet officer was never there it was all an illusion

" it was not an emotional response, it was purely logical " Spock you kidnapped 300 people and a man that was dying to bring him to a planet , that just so he'll live out the rest of his days happily I'd say that's emotional

He also possibly killed about 4 people not sure

[hargrove-mayfields]

Day four of the Horror on Cherry Lane Challenge! Today’s prompt was Sunglasses!

Steve has a lot of secrets. Too many probably.

Most teenagers’ secrets are things like sleeping with the wrong people, smoking the cheap shit the jocks pass out, broken curfews and failing grades. He’s got all of those too, but Steve's secret runs much deeper than that.

His is the kind of secret that’d have men in black suits coming to take him away, or at this point, more than a decade after letting him go in the first place, putting a bullet in the back of his skull and calling it a day before any trouble comes up.

He’s been stuck in Hawkins all his life. Been fed the knowledge about the world off a silver spoon he didn’t ask for. His first five years of life are well forgotten to shock therapy and to the lab, where they intended to use him and the rest of the kids like him as weapons. Pawns in their big game of life.

But Steve was different. He could turn his powers off, make them undetectable by the machines they hooked him up to. They thought he was just a failure, so after so long, they wiped his brain with their very own cocktail of drugs and just let him go. Adopted him out to a middle aged dink couple who wouldn’t run their mouths about where their little bundle of joy came from as long as their pockets were lined with enough hush money, and that was that.

It didn’t take long for them to realize though, that he wasn’t as normal as they had been convinced he was. Not even knowing he was doing anything wrong, little Stevie would have outbursts, or small tantrums as momma always tried to convince everyone who told her Steve was too much for her to handle.

These weren’t just normal crying fits though. Anyone who got near him would be just as sad or scared or frustrated as he was. A single sob from that boy had enough power to crack the foundations of the family home.

Most kids when they have a cranky morning will get on the nerves of their parents, but Steve could disrupt the whole neighborhood without even realizing it. And that was his power.

They didn’t have a name for it, really. The range of what he can do is too broad, too undefined by anything else. There was a telekinetic girl, a pyrokinetic he’s pretty sure is dead now. But Steve was just special. Part of what made it so easy to go under their radar was this, but it also made him a risk.

The only reason he wasn’t immediately reported and given back to the bad men was the power this frail boy carried. It scared Ruthie and John, and they decided that they’d rather face the men at that lab again than a seven year old who could accidentally destroy them with his emotions.

So they kept him, and certainly kept their distance. They forced him into a little mold of how to behave properly and made him take pills to weaken his powers. They send him to behavioral therapy and make him act like he’s not a failed government experiment. A fact which he only learned a couple of years ago after his pills worked a little too well at messing with his memory that he forgot to take them, and memories came flooding back.

For the same reasons, Steve’s bored of being careful. Bored of following all the rules and being passive, just pretending he’s like everyone else so mommy and daddy dearest are safe. He starts getting a little riskier, testing what he can do, since this is the first time he’s ever really had control over his ability. He finds a link with other people and their emotions, something of an empathy power, but he doesn’t get far in his research, because his plan very quickly goes to shit when Billy Hargrove rolls into town.

Where to begin with Billy. That boy makes him feel all sorts of things he never even considered. The very first day he showed his unimpressed (but very impressive) face at Hawkins high, Steve cracks his windshield. Oops.

He was able to tap into that control and tone it down, but that reserve dwindled the more he’s around Billy, and from there it just spirals. Bending the basketball hoop on accident, exploding light fixtures, giving everyone in the school headaches. It gets to the point where Steve has to come to terms with the fact that he had a crush on Billy, and that he has to do something to get it back under his control before somebody gets hurt.

That and he doesn’t want to get caught now. He just got back into the swing of using his powers before Billy interrupted his calm. Going back there, or whatever else might happen, is the last thing he wants for himself.

He settles for a pair of ray bans.

It’s stupid, but when Steve was still young and all but popping his mommas brains every single time he cried, she was desperate to find a way to get him to stop. She started to notice he’d concentrate hard on one thing and another would happen, staring at a lamp until it shattered, looking into her face until her ears started to ring and pop. So she does what she can to break that subconscious focus. Puts a barrier between him and all that he’s hurting. A plastic, race car themed barrier, but it does its job, and it worked every time until they got him on meds. So now that he’s old enough not to just tear the damn things right off his face, he figures it’s worth a shot.

Because nothing had made him this emotional, this out of control since the day he found out the truth about his past. Billy is special, and the very last thing he wants is to lose control and hurt him.

He still feels like a dope walking into the school with a pair of shades on. Everyone starts to stare in that way he tries not to let remind him of the lab and the doctors standing in circles around him, prodding and waiting for a reaction. Steve thinks wearing sunglass inside is the least weird thing to happen in the halls of a highschool if Tina can come in with a perm high enough to touch the ceiling, but whatever. He’ll get over it.

The fact that nothing’s exploded from how on edge he is, mostly from wondering if his momma’s trick will work and not because of their judgement, is a very good sign.

Boldly, he decides to put it to the ultimate test, and approaches Billy.

In his head, he’s so focused on just going to talk to Billy, he has nothing planned to say to him, but he thinks he would’ve forgotten anyways, what with the lazy smile Billy flashes him when he notices him approaching.

Steve’s gaze quickly darts past Billy to check for damage to anything, the racing in his chest from just a look like that typically enough to at least crack a window. Maybe he’s not as confident about this as he thought, or maybe Billy’s just really good at making him flustered.

Doesn’t matter, because he’s at the other boys locker before he has time to process what he’s doing, “Lookin’ for somethin’ Harrington?”

“Oh, yeah, I was just checking for uh, my fans. Yeah, they follow me around everywhere, you know?” It’s bullshit, and it sounds more than dumb coming out of Steve’s mouth, but it makes Billy laugh, real low and raspy and that’s a win in his book.

“That what the little disguise is for?” Billy hums and taps his temple, clearly referring to the sun glasses perched on Steve’s nose.

“Oh these? No, I uh, wear these ‘cause of the uh.. because I wanna sleep in class and down want the teachers to know?” His answer comes as more of a question than anything, so he’s grateful when Billy seems to be more interested in his excuse than the subject at hand.

“Pfft, yeah right. I’ve heard you sleepin’ on the basketball bus. Ain’t no way your snoring doesn’t get you caught before your eyes do.”

Steve just waves him off, laughs with Billy even if his heart isn’t in it.

Billy closes his locker door, switching the subject as the scenery switches. It’s all a distraction to Steve, but he forces himself to look Billy in the face as the other boy asks him, “Seriously though dude, you okay? It ain’t like you to switch up your look. You’re not hiding anythin’ under the shades are you?”

“Nah. Just been thinking, I’m not the King because I’m not cool anymore, right? So I’m tryin’ to look a little more.. interesting.” Steve’s not a very quick or good liar, despite the military guarded secret that is himself and the little black number seven carved into his arm, and he can tell Billy doesn’t buy it.

He’s a good sport though, throwing an arm around Steve’s shoulders and assuring him with a little jostle, “Aw, Stevie, you're cool in my book. At least as long as you quit comin’ up with reasons not to hang with me, yeah?”

“Yeah, I- alright. I can do that. Sorry for flaking so much though. Didn’t realize until you said something.”

“S’Cool. Just meet me at the quarry after dark and it’ll make up for it.” Billy offers, obviously trying to play up the coolness neither of them apparently actually have, and Steve can’t help but call him on it. “It gets dark at like, four-thirty, five o’clock anymore?”

“Fine. Meet me at nine, pretty boy.” Billy smirks, dropping his voice to add knowingly, “And lose the shades. I think you’re much more interesting without ‘em.”

[cipheress-to-k-pop]

Again

Pairing: Five Hargreeves x Reader

Warnings: Notes of depression and suicidal thoughts but nothing explicitly mentioned

Word Count: 2.4K

Summary: Five Hargreeves seems to have his heart taken by a mysterious girl who has spent a lot of time with him in a future that he’s trying desperately to erase.

Author’s Note: My first TUA work and so kinda excited for it. Will there be a part two?? Undecided for now must most probably not.

Forever Taglist: @simonsbluee​

“Hello?” Five called out as he walked closer to where the heaps of his findings had fallen down. The dust cloud was making it difficult to see but as soon as it settled, he sighed.

‘Of course.’ Why did he even expect to find anyone?

 But then another pile fell down and he knew it couldn’t have been a coincidence. He ran over the coincidence fallen debris to find you hiding behind it, looking dehydrated and in tears.

His eyes widened when they landed on the burns on your body, finding it amazing that you even managed to survive them.

But compared to the others, you got off easy.

“Hello?”

The whole while you had been staring at him but it was only when he spoke it felt like you were actually looking at him.

Immediately, you got to your feet, tears spilling onto your cheeks as you threw your arms around him. He instinctively caught your form as it collided with his, holding you close as you buried your head into his neck, sobbing.

“I’m so glad you found me.”

****

Allison noticed the way Five looked longingly across the street. At first, she thought he was just staring lovingly at the cafe because he needed a shot of espresso but she quickly noticed that his eyes were locked on the tables outside the little coffee shop.

In a table right underneath the shade of a parasol, sat you alongside your older sister, just enjoying a drink and chatting very animatedly. She looked between the two of you a couple of times, wondering which one of you Five was staring at but ultimately deciding that it wasn’t important.

“Five?”

“Hmm?” He answered distractedly, not shifting his gaze to his sister and continuing to watch you. Seeing you smile so brightly had a small smile coming to his face but no matter who saw it there was a touch of despair and sadness behind it.

“Do you know her?”

“Not....yet.”

She turned back to the table, watching you drink whatever you had in your cup and wondered what Five meant by that. Were you someone who survived the Apocalypse?

“Yes.”

“Oh, I said that out loud?”

“She’s the sole survivor of the Apocalypse.”

It was as though you could hear them talking about you even though they had the distance of a busy road between the two of you, but you looked up and locked eyes with him, holding your gaze curiously.

He continued to look at you with an unreadable emotion and time slowed down. The noises around Five slowly faded into cotton and the people faded into wisps of sweet-scented smoke.

And then suddenly like as if someone crashed through a window, he heard a glass smash and the trance was broken. You turned back to your sister, only sparing small glances back at him to see if this mysterious stranger was still watching you.

“Five? You okay, buddy?”

He sighed, now knowing that you really couldn’t recognize him and so he turned his back to you, disappointed, to meet his sibling’s concerned eyes.

“I’m not sure.”

****

You cuddled closer to five, watching the fire flicker and trying to stop shivering. He sighed exasperatedly and you knew he was angry with you but you really couldn’t care less about how he felt while your teeth chattered and you shook like a chihuahua.

“I know you’re upset with me because I made us stop but it’s not like we have a deadline or something. It’s just the two of us, we can do things as slowly as we want to.” You told him, trying to relax but something in the back of your mind wasn’t settling right.

You hated being alone with him. You hated being the only 2 people on the planet. Your heart yearned for something else.

“Dammit, (Y/N), we can’t just sit around and do nothing!” He snapped, throwing the last piece of kindling into the fire and a few of the embers jumped out.

“Why not! It’s not like we have anything to live for here anyway! We should just end it now!” You shouted in his face, feeling a wave of tears grow. You missed your normal life, you missed your family, your parents and people.

You missed it all.

“I won’t die like this! I will find a way to stop the Apocalypse even if it kills me! I will fight for it!” It seemed like he was trying to convince himself more than you but all you felt was a weight on your heart and you broke down into tears, hiding your face from Five who immediately felt guilty.

“I can’t fight anymore, Five. There’s nothing waiting for us at the end of the line, I can’t do this anymore, Five, I can’t.” You sobbed.

He pulled you into his arms and you cried into his chest while he rubbed gentle strokes up and down your back while you choked over your own breath. He felt his own tears prick in the corner of his eyes.

“We’ll change it all, there has to be something, (Y/N), there just has to.”

****

“Five are you okay?” Came a concerned voice from one of his brothers but the younger boy (physically) couldn’t tell which one it was. He was far too lost in his own thoughts.

“Five?” Allison called out again, shaking her little brother’s (again, physically) shoulder and he snapped out of his trance, only realizing then he had overfilled his cup of coffee and spilled it everywhere.

“Oh.” He muttered quietly before getting a rag to clean it up.

Above his head, Allison and Klaus shared a concerned look and had a mental conversation about whether they should ask Five what was bothering him. It was likely he would just talk about equations and tell them they didn’t have the capacity to understand it.

But this seemed different to his usual ‘I’m superior than you and incredibly stressed about this Apocalypse’ silence. So, against their better judgement they decided to ask Five about it.

“Five is everything okay? You’ve been acting weird ever since the coffee shop.”

“Oh, coffee shop? What happened at the coffee shop? Was there another gun fight?” Asked Klaus excitedly and Allison spared him an eye-roll before sitting down.

“No, he saw a girl and well, he did that.” She explained, pointing to Five where he stood just holding a rag in his hands and not even bothering to wipe up the mess he made.

“Oh, well I can fix that no problem.”  Klaus said, sliding off the table and onto one of the chairs, “You see, baby brother, when a boy comes to the age of puberty—”

“Shut up!” Ben snapped from behind him and Allison slapped the back of his head but Klaus clearly saw the smile on her face before she glared at him.

“Five seriously, what’s wrong? Who was that girl?”

“She—” His voice cracked a little and he cleared his throat, “She’s nobody.”

“Not yet.” She pressed and he sighed before abandoning the rag and sitting in front of them. The older siblings immediately noticed the way he was playing with his tie, fidgeting in a way that was very unlike him.

“You said she survived the Apocalypse. So, the two of you obviously met.”

“Yeah, we did.” He spoke softly, still fidgeting with his collar and not meeting their eyes.

“And I’m assuming she’s important to you somehow?”

He sighed, leaving his collar and from his palm fell out the pendant of the necklace hung around his neck. Although from a closer look, it was a pendant as much as a—

The three of them gasped, “Five, she is not.”

He nodded sadly, hand going back to the wedding band strung on a chain around his neck.

****

“Do you think it’s legal?”

“We’re pretty much the only people here so I’m assuming it is.”

“Don’t we need witnesses or something?”

“That’s a stupid old law, made my stupid old folks that aren’t alive anymore.” He said, smiling gently as he wrapped his arms around your waist. You gave him a teasing smile, reaching up to brush a few strands of hair out of his face.

You couldn’t help the giggles when he reached down to kiss you gently. It was infectious apparently because Five couldn’t stop the smile from growing on his face either as he leaned closer, making your back curve.

“I like the way you think, Mr. Hargreeves.”

“I like the way you kiss, Mrs. Hargreeves.”

You chortled and burst into laughter as did he. It was one of the happiest moments since you both found each other and moments like these were as rare as they came, when the two of you were just laughing in each other’s arms like carefree people.

Of course, you couldn’t have a big fancy wedding with your family and go for a fancy honeymoon, but this wedding gave you something that you had wanted ever since the Apocalypse.

A family.

****

Allison, Klaus and Ben all noticed the way that Five smiled when he thought about you. They noticed the gentleness in his voice and how wistful it became all of a sudden as he told them about you.

Allison grinned at him, feeling incredibly relieved that her brother had somebody to hold him while he had suffered through the apocalypse. Hearing the story of how he survived so many years all alone really broke her heart.

She always knew that she had a rough childhood without the love of a real father, but hearing Five’s story made her feel like she had it easy. At least she had civilization around her.

But even with the relief she felt it was ridiculously incredulous that her brother who couldn’t even drive legally yet was legally married. It was too much to even process and a part of her is reminded of when her daughter told her that she married Elmo.

But the longer she watched Five the more convinced she grew. He actually married you and lived a long life by your side before he came here to stop the Apocalypse.

“Wait...” She spoke up, realization hitting her, “Five, if the two of you met because of the Apocalypse, if you stop it...” She stopped herself from saying the rest, seeing his face fall. Klaus gasped softly from beside them, understanding what Allison was trying to say.

It seemed like Five was trying to gather himself and both siblings say the way he swallowed painfully and the way his mouth quivered for just a second.

“I know.”

****

“I want you to do this, Five.” You told your husband, holding onto him tighter and burying your face into his neck and trying to hide your tears from him.

His arms looped around your waist and he pressed kisses to your shoulder, cradling your head gently. You heard his breath stutter by your ear and tightened your hold on him.

“I won’t leave you.” He said firmly and you sighed but didn’t move from his hold. He was firm on that decision since he married you, giving up on his search to find the correct equation, promising that he wouldn’t abandon you.

But you knew what lied in his heart. His love for his siblings, the guilt for not doing anything to save them and him spending hours awake while you were asleep just wondering what it would have been like had he done something.

“You’ll never forgive yourself if you don’t do this.” You murmured and his body shook a little from trying to hold in his sobs.

“I can’t leave you.”

“It’s okay.” You whispered, pulling away to cup his cheeks and you wiped a few of his stray tears away. You knew it must have been tearing him up inside if he was crying and it hurt but you also knew that he needed to hear this.

“It’s okay, I’m happy that we had our time together. I’m so unbelievably happy to have met you, Five, but I know that this is something you need to do.” You told him earnestly, still wiping tears from his cheeks.

“I love you.” He whispered so gently because he was sure his voice would crack.

“I love you too.” The tears running down your cheeks was in contrast to the sad smile on your face as you pulled him in for a hug.

It was after that he began his search to find the right equation again and it was admirable to see him work so hard but also heart-breaking because you knew when he would find the right one the two of you would be separated.

But still you encouraged him and supported him, knowing that in another world, the two of you could have possibly been happier had the Apocalypse not taken place.

It hurt, but at the same time, you wanted it to happen, which broke your heart even more.

And somewhere deep down you hoped that you would meet Five in another life and love him again.

You really hoped.

****

You sat quietly in the corner of the booth with earphones plugged in and reading a book with your favourite drink sitting on the table in front of you. You were so immersed in the book that you didn’t hear the boy in front of you until he tapped on the table politely.

Pulling out an earphone, you looked up to see a boy about your age with a charming smile and a cup of coffee in his hands.

“Hi, do you mind if I sit here?”

“Of course not.” You smiled, moving your bag off the table so he could sit comfortably.

“I’m Five.” He said, holding his hand out for you to shake and you nodded.

“That’s a pretty unusual name, I’m (Y/N).”

He smiled in a mysterious yet adorable way and you couldn’t help but feel that there was a reason he sat down. One you would find out extremely later but for now it was enticing and curious which attracted you to him even more.

“Nice to meet you.”

‘Again.’