#like the vibe? even if i choose female mc i still feel like mc is a guy 💀

[houseoflibra-if]

Hiii duven! Hope you are well. ♥️

I have questions and a scenario please cuz im apparently obsess with the toxicness of this ask. But I will send that separately as to not make this long ass post. 🤣

So questions if it isn't too spoilery.

1. Does MCs gender/sexuality matter at all in your world building? And also to the ROs? Are all of them on board or is there some conflicting?

Are people still prudish assholes because of all the prominence of the houses aswell as well possible arranged unions/ carrying on bloodlines.

2. Who is the least to most slowburn routes among the ROs?

HELLOOOOOOO 🙃

I'm doing well, thank you for asking! I have to stay healthy as I'm having a major upcoming exam 😭

For your first question:

Yes!

Gender does matter in the little things, like politics and social norms. Females experience a little bit more struggle in the Kingdom, such as having specific job options and less power politically (but they hold the reins for the kingdoms bank, only women are in charge of that)

For men, they are catered more towards governing and Labour work (like fighting and farming). Don't worry though, I don't plan to make governing a men only thing.

For non-binary people, they're more free? In a sense. They can do whatever they want lmao. These people tend to partake in the more leisurely side of life, like becoming storytellers and singers.

Sexualities don't matter much. Unless you plan to romance an animal. Then you'll be placed in jail/exiled.

Regarding the question of the ROs... You'll have to wait and see. It depends on your choices after all.

Yes. Many prudish assholes. It gives off historical manhwa vibes lmao.

Ranking of slow burn romance:

A -> N -> E -> C

Avira/Aurelius is the fastest. They literally fall in love when you first fight them haha. If you choose to romance them, their loyalty towards you will be unbreakable, even if it means disobeying their House.

Nyoka would've been the fastest to romance if it wasn't for the fact that you don't meet them in early game. They hold some semblance of feelings for you, so it's up to you to reciprocate.

Esme/Esmeray have an ideal slow burn route, the typical cold hearted protagonist. Be warned, the moment you thaw their icy heart they will never let you go. Kinda possessive tbh.

Castora/Castor is surprisingly the hardest to romance as they have some personal issues that make them more emotionally closed off. Spoilers tho 😉

[vivalgi]

My impressions of the latest Choices Insiders:

Another LI with generic pose, generic chiseled features, generic suit and once again they're rich. I understand that one has to have a well paying job to afford a living space in American suburbia these days, especially as a single person but PB has been weirdly obsessed with the wealthy demographics. I guess while on the outside everyone has the "eat the rich" mentality, people still secretly dream of finding a hot sugar daddy.

The LIs also looks quite a bit older than usual, I'd say 35-40. Not sure how I'd feel about it. As an MLW player I'd prefer my partners younger than MC, unless it's a short fling with a hot MILF 😉. But we'll see, maybe the LI won't be so bad. Although, I'll probably fall for some cute side character, as it tends to be in my case.

It's not quite like I worded my question but it's something. The future of Multiple LI stories is a valid question since the app is called Choices and being able to choose between multiple LIs has been the only remaining meaningful choice until now. However, in recent years the single LI books have taken over like parasites and the app doesn't live up to its name anymore. These are not interactive stories anymore, just visual novels with linear plots. "An interactive narrative experience where your decisions shape the story" my ass.

The answer to this question makes it pretty clear that we won't get another new series with multiple LIs until at least spring of next year. This means Kindred and BOLAS2 will be the only 2 real Choices books this year in the sea of single LI novels and the latter is a sequel to a book from a different era. Besides, who knows, this murder mystery and ID2 might also be the only 2 non-single LI books in 2024.

And no, 2+ male LIs and 1 female LI doesn't count. MAH was still a single LI book to me.

Alpha - having seen the leaked cover, I'm pretty sure we won't be the titular character in this story. The male character with the omegaverse hinting tattoo and heavily pierced face looks too detailed to be the MC and the generic female doesn't give off alpha vibes. PB's gonna disappoint lots of players since most of the fandom wishes to be the alpha instead.

Ship of Dreams - I guess we all know what it's gonna be about. Also probably another forbidden romance like the movie. I wonder if they'll manage to fit together on the door this time 😛

Unbridled - PB altered the deal yet again by emphasizing this is a spin-off so they could make the Untameable sequel a VIP story before next year. A bit of a scum move if you ask me but fine, whatever.

Guarded - probably PB's attempt to make a better bodyguard story than Witness. I predict it will be heavily inspired by the 1992 movie The Bodyguard, where we'll be another damsel in distress in another forbidden romantic relationship with another knight in shining armor (the bodyguard).

Hot Shot - I checked the sports books on Chapters since PB seems to copy a lot of creative decisions from its main rival lately. I saw that Chapters even has a whole separate category for hockey books which the Hot Shots will also be about based on "🏒" hints. Also based on Chapters' books, I have a strong fear the MC won't be the titular character but some lowly waitress or bartender, at most a nurse, a journalist or even just LI's roommate's sibling. The LI will likely be a dangerous /reckless playboy/bad boy team captain.

[ohzhuy]

i think one day we really need to talk about the absence of butch women in interactive fiction. i think i've never actually played a game where you could romance a butch woman.

[yukidragon]

Hey I got into your Tumblr though your 'Our Life' writings and then saw your 'Sunday Jack' stuff too. Which caused me to play the demo (which was fire)!!! So I was just wondering if you have any other dating sim/ visual novels you'd recommend?

P.S. I love your writing!!!!

Awww... you’re so sweet! I’m glad you like my writing and that my love of these two series led you to play and enjoy SDJ too. 💖

Well, Our Life: Beginnings & Always and Something’s Wrong With Sunny Day Jack (if you’re over 18) would be my top recommendations, as both of them caught my attention hardcore enough to do a lot of writing and art for them. So I guess we’ll start there with other things the creators have made.

Our Life: Now & Forever is the sequel game to Our Life: Beginnings & Always, and centers around two main love interests you grow up with - Qiu and Tamarack. The first Our Life was about male love interests, and the second stars a non-binary and female love interest, with any potential extra ones added also not being male. There’s not too much to it yet, since it’s still in the development phase, but it does have a demo. Though you might have played it already if you found me through the Our Life fandom, I figured I’d recommend it anyway.

Since you must be over 18 to have played Sunny Day Jack, I’ll let you know that game’s creator, Jambeebot, has made another, much smaller NC-17 visual novel experience called DachaBo. It has no story progression yet, and is pretty much demo of a boyfriend simulator where your portable digital pet loves and desires you sexually. There are also hints at a much darker story underneath, particularly since this digital pet is (not-so) secretly a yandere. You can get little teasers of where the story might go, as well as teasers for Sunny Day Jack on their twitter here. Like SDJ, the dialogue in this visual novel is fully voiced.

If you’re looking for another NC-17 rated yandere visual novel demo that caught my attention, then I’d suggest trying 14 Days with You. It’s about a yandere named Ren who is a really interesting and complicated character. He has a few similarities with Jack, but Ren is a hacker rather than a supernatural entity. You have the option of an MC who is male, female, or nonbinary specifically. Ren even respects whether or not you choose to whoo hoo with him, and he’ll make sure you won’t get his bad ending even if you try to go that route. Oh, there’s also an official tumblr for it here: @14dayswithyou if you want to see more lore teasers after playing the demo.

Another good NC-17 visual novel that is pretty soft and heavily emphasizes choice and consent is Cute Demon Crashers. It has a female MC who has the choice of having her first time with one of three incubi or a succubus. The interactions with each character is pretty sweet, and the game is very sex positive. The characters are very sweet and can give you some nice Cove vibes. You can stop sexy times at any time you wish, there’s a lot of spicy cutscenes, and you can even have the option of choosing the no sex route with no hard feelings. The sex demons in this one are also fully voiced, and it’s a short, but complete story experience.

Keeping with another NC-17 rated visual novel that I enjoyed, there’s Love and Romance - A Study of Intimacy. This story is about a specific named pair, a writer and her agent. The writer needs to improve her erotic writing, but lacks inspiration. Her agent, fortunately, has the solution - a getaway to a cabin for the two of them. He’ll even choose to help the writer study sex in a more hands on way if you so choose. This can even be a one time thing or lead to a longer standing relationship. It’s very soft and steamy and I always choose the romantic route. Also, the male protagonist is fully voiced, and this is also a short but complete story.

Tailor Tales is an interesting blend of visual novel and dress up shop simulator. It centers around self-contained, decently sized stories about a singular male lead, starring a female lead who you can choose to rename and tweak her appearance slightly. There’s no bad ends, but rather the route is choosing between the “innocent” and “passionate” options that influence the ending depending on which type you chose the most of, but you can mix them up. Each guy’s romance route is an entirely different self-contained story, so in a sense you’re hopping between AUs with the same female lead. So far, three are slice-of-life, while the fourth and latest love interest is a sci-fi superhero action romp. While this game, like others on this list, are free, there’s an optional paid DLC that gives the option of a couple NC-17 rated side-stories with the specific guy for the DLC you buy. You can even choose your preferred terminology for the naughty bits in the scenes.

Cinderella Phenomenon is a fantasy based retelling of a mixture of various fairy tales. The main character is Lucette, the “Cinderella” of the story who, in a twist, is the crown princess of her country. She’s bitter and cynical, struggling to deal with gaining a new step-mother and step-siblings. However, there is something called the Fairytale Curse where various fairytales affect people negatively. Lucette has to go to a place where others also suffering from the curse are staying and there she bonds and slowly uncovers the mysteries of her kingdom and her own bloodline. There are a lot of routes and this is a heavily story-focused game with some romance, as you choose your romance route at the start of each playthrough. I will warn you though that there are ways to get the bad end in this game...

That seems like a good amount of visual novels for you to check out, and that’s all the free ones that come to my mind at the moment. There are others I’m aware of that keep popping up in my feeds lately like My Dear Hatchet Man (which apparently shares the same universe as Sunny Day Jack!) and Error 413, but I’m afraid I haven’t tried them yet, so I can’t exactly give them a recommendation. I’m sure I’ll get to them eventually, but for now I’m distracted with writing for Cove and Jack, and I’m worried about adding yet another series to the pile!

I hope you find something here you like. Thanks again for enjoying my writing, and I hope you have fun!

[mercedesdecorazon]

LITG: How would the BW characters react to a Black MC?

Okay so this has been in my head for a minute and I wanted to do some headcanons about the black female characters in the game because they deserve more love.

So these are my headcanons about how these bw characters would feel about a black MC and how they would interact with her.

Season 1:

Erikah: Okay, so Erikah gives me the vibe that she has grown up around a lot of white people. For most of her life, Erikah was the token black girl/black best friend.

When she meets MC in the Villa, she has mixed emotions: one hand, she's excited to have another black girl and on the other hand, she's a little threatened and insecure.

And if MC gets all the attention from the guys, Erikah's insecurities worsen. She's so used to being the token for so long that she doesn't know how to cope with having another black woman around, getting all the attention she would normally get, leading to #Cherrygate.

After Cherrygate happens, MC cuts off Erikah completely, surprising Erikah. Erikah tries to 'make amends' but MC sees through her act and rebuffs her coldly.

For the rest of the their time in the Villa, Erikah and MC are distant and cold with one another. Very unfortunate 😕

Season 2:

Hope: Unlike Erikah, Hope is ecstatic to have another black woman as an OG. Hope grew up with three sisters, so she's surrounded by black women daily. The two would spend time together, having a lot of chats. But Operation Nope would be the catalyst that would make, strain or break their friendship.

If MC does ON: Hope would especially feel betrayed. She thought that MC would have her back as a fellow black woman but the fact that MC would betray her so callously - that would hurt her deeply. The friendship is over. For good.

If MC doesn't do ON, but doesn't warn Hope: The friendship would be strained for a while. If MC explains her side, that she wanted to stand by Bobby (if she's paired up with Bobby) or that she wanted nothing to do with it, Hope would still feel a way but I think they could patch things up, after a LONG while.

If MC doesn't do ON and she warns Hope: The friendship is cemented for life. Hope realises that out of all the girls, MC is most likely to have her back and be on her side. They're friends for life.

Season 3:

Genevieve: Okay so there are two paths here, there's Genevieve as an OG and there's Genevieve as a bombshell. MC and Genevieve's relationship would differ according to these two paths.

Genevieve as an OG: They would click straight away. Like Hope, I see Genevieve being happy with having another black woman in the Villa. When MC's partner is stolen by Miki/Iona, Genevieve would be the first person to console her. It's Friend Island for these two.

Genevieve as a bombshell: MC would be immediately wary of her and their relationship would become even more strained when Genevieve steals Harry from MC. It would take a while for them to become friends.

Season 4:

This is the first season where MC is the bombshell, so the dynamics and relationships are a lot different.

Thabi: I think Thabi would be intimidated by MC and even gets jealous when Will flirts with her. If MC couples up with Will, well, Thabi would feel some type of way for a long while. And when Will chooses her over MC, Thabi would be ecstatic at her victory. But MC would ignore her for the rest of their time in the Villa, making Thabi feel bad. I don't think these two would be close until after the show, until after everything is said and done. They would both apologise and be civil with one another.

If MC doesn't choose Will, then I think they'll be close friends. BFFs even. MC would help Thabi to come out of her shell and stand up for herself, and Thabi would defend and speak up for MC during the whole Dylangate debacle. After the show, they would still be close friends and if they're both single, they would become roommates.

Najuma: If MC is bisexual, pansexual or a lesbian, I could see these two coupling up at some point. There would be a lot of physical and sexual attraction there. I'm not too sure that they'll last outside the Villa but it would be a cute summer romance nevertheless.

If MC is straight, then they would be friendly but not really friends.

Cora: Whether MC is straight or not, I could see her and Cora getting along very well. During Dylangate, Cora and Kobi would be going off on Dylan and reading him for filth! MC, Cora and Kobi would be the Iconic Trio of Season 4 and no one can change my mind about that.

I could see MC and Cora getting together for a bit, realise that they're better as friends and break up mutually. I don't think the relationship would hurt their friendship too much, I think their friendship would strengthen a bit.

Thanks for reading! Let me know if you guys want me to do a 'How BM characters react to a Black MC' version! I have some thoughts about that as well ✨️

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: August 8th

Well, doing big posts all together worked for a while but lately I’ve been putting it off because it takes a long time to get them done. I think I’m gonna try switching back to answering asks whenever I can fit it in and posting them one at a time instead of waiting until I’ve filled out one of these major collections.

But for now, here’s more ask answers! Thank you for the questions and for all the kind words along with them ^^.

Hello!! I'm here to ask if its possible to get  the game and its dlcs on steam and play it on android?

I’m afraid not. Steam doesn’t have Android builds on their own site and Steam is not cool with keys for other sites being given out for Steam purchases, so you don’t get the Itch version from buying on Steam.

Hello! Sorry to bother you but, I had a question, if we buy the Game on itchio do we get steam keys or would we need to purchase it twice? 

You would have to buy it twice if you want it in both places, I’m sorry. To repeat myself a little, Steam doesn’t like the key trading thing. Itch may support giving keys for another site, but the reverse isn’t doable with Steam and Steam doesn’t even really want you to get a Steam key for buying somewhere else either. So we just don’t mess around with that.

hey, sorry if this is frequently asked, but is step 4 free dlc or paid for? some of your sources are contradicting each other. 

It’s free! There’s a paid wedding DLC, but Step 4 itself is entirely unpaid.

Hello! I just had a quick question, for the Baxter and Derek DLC's will we be able to confess our feelings to them or let them confess to MC? or will it only be one way? (they confess to MC)

Both type of options will be available!

Hey there! I wanted to ask whether or not the Derek DLC is still on track to be released in August since on the steam discussion board it says it will be released mid 2021. I totally understand if it isn't, I'm just really looking forward to it! If you answer then ty! And keep up the amazing work :D 

It’s not, aha. Unfortunately, 2021 wasn’t easier than 2020 as we hoped so things are still slower than planned. It’ll come out late 2021 or early 2022.

Hi! Firstly I just want to say that I LOVE Our Life. I have played a bit of similar games but this one instantly wins for the best one! Everything about it is amazing! I just wanted to ask if Derek would ever lose feelings for MC, like if they make the deal and then MC gets with Cove would he move on? and even if you don't, after "losing contact" would his feeling fade or would he still like MC? 

If you don’t really keep in touch with him and clearly move on with your life, Derek will too and he’ll be over it. But if you are still close as best as you can be, he’ll still think the MC is special. Though, he’ll always support your relationship with someone else if that’s what’ll make you happy.

Hello! Sorry if you've answered this before but: 'How's Lee related to us? Though which momma? And does she share our player-chosen last names? Also, do you know if Noelani took Pam's last name or did it happen the other way round? 

She’s related to Pamela and Pamela’s last name is the one they use, so the MC has the same last name as Lee.

Will we be able to choose which (they or he) we tend to call Qiu by more often, or will it randomly change depending on the moment? 

Qiu knows which pronoun they’re comfortable with at a time and you’ll call them what they’re happy with. And it doesn’t change between lines, it takes multiple scenes or even full Steps for it to switch. So for extended periods Qiu will be totally a guy or fully agender.

Will Step 4 of OL2 have moments?

It’ll be an epilogue like it is in OL1, so it won’t have a bunch of different Moments.

Hello! Just a quick question, is Sunset bird from OL1 based on a real location? If so what's it called? I wanna visit it +_+

ps i love your games so much <3

It isn’t based on one specific town you can go to, but there are a lot of little coastal towns in Cali that have a similar vibe!

Heyaaa ( I hope you're all well ), umm… it might seem kinda stupid to ask but did Patreon members can have a key for the dlc's ( all the steps-released dlc ) even if they became a member this month or later ? (me? saying this cuz it's my case? maybe ;-;), and once again thanks for absolutely all the amazing works on all the games ! u-u 

You wouldn’t get the DLCs for backing there. The Patreon is for extra bonus content/early access, rather than being a storefront to purchase the normal DLCs. Rarely we give them out as a side gift, but it hardly happens and if what you want is the DLCs it’s best to ignore the Patreon and  buy keys for those directly from Itch or Steam. I’m sorry for the confusion.

Hey y'all, love what youre doing w/Terry. Trans rep outside of player customization is so rare and important to see more of so thank you so much. I do have a question and its that does he have a canon sexuality? I know Miranda was said to be straight ace but I dont believe anything was stated for Terry probably because he wasnt revealed to be a guy which changes things. Im also curious if well get answers on how long hes liked Miranda since he may have liked her in step 3 before she liked him 

Terry likes women and Randy likes men! And he did like Miranda back in Step 3.

Will the Wedding Dlc release at the same time as Step 4? 

They’ll come out separately with Step 4 releasing first.

I really love Our Life so much! I've spent over 20hours playing it even though I only got it a week ago! I was wondering if I could make a fangame for Our Life with a different love interest but same plot. Next-door neighbors romance, multiple steps, etc? I'll probably make it on Google Slides though- 

Sure! I hope you have fun with it and I’m glad you love the game.

How does Cove feel about poly relationships? 

He’s got nothing against them for the people they work for, but he’s 100% monogamous and would only be comfortable with a partner who was willing to be monogamous with him.

Idk if this has been answered before but will Step 4 include the option to advance your feelings towards Cove? 

Yep, you’ll be able to determine your feelings and what your relationship is.

In step 4 will there be a chosen to say we live with Cove even as just friends? 

Yeah, you can choose to live with Cove and that can be done when you’re friends.

I just played the game with the MC and Cove being best friends and omg it’s still so damn cute like the wholesomeness of it all is too much for my heart I swear ^.^  Now with that all said I was wondering can we still marry Cove? if we only love him as a friend like let’s say we’ve made deal with him similar to the one we can make with Derek because let’s real no one could compete with what the MC and Cove have even if they aren’t in love. 

It’s great to hear you enjoyed the friendship story! You can live with Cove, but you can’t marry him platonically. Cove has familial affection for the MC if they’re best-est friends. He wouldn’t think to marry someone he loves like family and even grew up with as though they truly were siblings.

Are you still going to be making a DLC for XOBD? :] 

Yes! We’re slowing adding voiced lines and fixing errors.

It makes me laugh that Shiloh's last name is Fields because that's what I put as my last name! So in Our Life when he talked about "Ms. Fields" picking him up I was extremely confused, lol. That dude mimics personalities so much that he stole my surname!

Oh, wow, that’s a very funny coincidence, haha.

hi !! i cant seem to be able to get the scene where mc is able to propose to cove despite being at the 'love' stage and telling him i'd want to get married, are there any other details that im missing out on? the options just dont appear at the end... 

Maybe you missed telling Cove you were in love with him even if you mentioned wanting to get married or you might’ve accidentally said earlier in the game that you don’t want to progress your relationship further with Cove. We haven’t removed them, so you can get the scene again. It’s just kind of easy to miss since there’s multiple requirements. You can read a little guide in the FAQ.

wait what di you need to do to be able to propose to cove? I've been trying but haven't had much luck 

You can check out the FAQ linked above!

does cove only develop a crush on the mc if the mc is also at crush/in love with him? 

Technically, yes. We treat the non-romantic relationship options as truly non-romantic since we don’t want to bait and switch people. But there’s nothing wrong with headcanoning that Cove does have feelings developing for the MC even before the MC has.

Is there a way to make/allow Lee and Baxter to date?

No, they just don’t have enough time together.

We also got a group of asks related to Tamarack in OL2, but I’m afraid the way they talked about people with larger bodies made me not want to post their words, even if the person didn’t say they’re trying to be hurtful. I will separate out the core question and answer it though, so people can know that info.

Does Tamarack lose weight in later Steps?

No, she doesn’t. As for the other questions included, to be honest, I don’t have to explain/defend having romance options of different sizes. I’m sorry if you’re dealing with unhappiness that’s connected to body image, if that’s where the negative emotions are coming from, but even so I can’t meet you on that level and pretend it’s a problem that needs an answer. A girl who simply isn’t thin being a main love interest is just not an unreasonable concept. Also, Tamarack isn’t a lesbian. Yes, she can date a female MC, but that doesn’t undo her actual sexuality, so I’m not sure where that one part at the end was coming from.

I wonder... can we "fight" with Qiu over leader status? 👀

Not really, haha. No matter how cool your MC is, they’re never gonna replace Qiu for the other kids around. So you can either partner up with him, follow him too, or not be a part of all that group politics stuff.

So when I play the game, sometimes I mentally call Cove “Covie/Covey” and that made me wonder, how does Cove feel about being nicknamed? Not like Romeo/Space Cadet/etc. but like pet names relating to his actual name

It’d depend on his age, personality, and your relationship with him! When he’s younger he’d probably be embarrassed, when he was grown he’d probably be more casual or happy about it.

will you be able to date baxter in step 3 while at crush with cove (but not dating him ofc) sorry if this has been asked already. i really love baxters step 4 design btw!! 

Yeah, you can be crushing on Cove and date Baxter if you weren’t already dating Cove. You just can’t be truly in love with Cove and then switch to Baxter.

I just got my friend into our life, and they adore shiloh and derek sooo will there be more of them in the second game? 

I’m afraid not. But you can see plenty more of Shiloh in XOXO Droplets/XOXO Blood Droplets, haha.

I see you haven't gotten any xoxo droplets asks recently but I'm still obsessed with these boys!! I was just wondering if Nate would curse under any circumstance? 

Yeah, Nate does use certain swear words (damn, hell, bastard) on very rare occasions.

Hi there! I have a question about the wedding dlc. Will we be able to plan a honeymoon during the planning stages of it or would it be something that Cove and the mc would rather plan later on? Thank you! Absolutly love the game by the way, definitely one of my favorite games! 

The focus will be on the wedding day itself. The topic of the honeymoon might come up a bit, but there won’t be any choosing of the exact location and such.

Hi! I have two questions and it's completely understandable if you only answer one/neither and I'm sorry if you've already answered either before! First, is there a set year in which OL:B&A takes place (ex: Step 1 being set in 2010 & Step 2 being set in 2016, etc.) or is it simply up to interpretation? Second, have you guys thought about doing a coming-of-age game where the MC has a tough home life or upbringing? (like one of their parents is an addict, a parent being transphobic whilst the player has the option to be trans, or having friends that are influencing them to do drugs, etc.) That's all! Thanks for making beautiful games. <3 

There is a set timeline!

Step 1: 2006 Step 2: 2011 Step 3: 2016 Step 4: 2021 

And we don’t currently plan on making a game like that. The Our Life series exists to be a safer environment for people to play around in and if we did do a brand new series that was harsher edged it’d be something more fantastical and/or plot-driven instead of a different type of modern day slice-of-life growing up story. I’m sorry.

i don’t know if you’ve already answered this, but do you have a guess on when phase 4 will come out? as well as ol2? i’m so excited for both of them, the inclusivity in this game is amazing, you guys should be really proud of it! 

Step 4 will be coming out very soon! OL2 is gonna take until 2023 to be anywhere near completion. But we might episodically release the Steps one at a time as they get done instead of waiting for three to be finished before launch like we did with the first game.

Hello, I was curious if there was an official or unofficial discord server for the game? 

We do have a discord! You can join by clicking this link HERE.

how long do you plan to keep ol's patreon running? 

Hopefully for at least a few more years.

Are you considering ever making merch? 

Yeah, but I don’t know when it’ll happen or what exactly we’ll make, aha. It’s something we want do, just nothing is set.

hi! i just found out about your game a couple of days ago on tiktok (so sorry if you’ve already answered this question) and i was wondering if y’all are ever planning to release it on iOS? 

I have no idea. It’s hard for a small group to get Apple approval and I honestly can’t say if it’ll ever happen or not. Maybe someday, though!

Hi, I love the art style of Our life and I would like to know if the artist has a Twitter? Also, could it be possible to fund more CGs for the game from him/her? So many times, I wish there was one like when the cutscene of the sunshower. 

That’s nice of you to offer. He doesn’t have a Twitter, at least not one that’s public enough to be shared with me. And I’m afraid not. The issue is that the CGs take huge amounts of time rather than there not being a budget for it. He’s gotta make CGs for Step 4, the DLCs, and new character sprites, too. There isn’t space in the schedule for even more. Sorry for that.

Hi, how are you?!

Are you planning on accepting new writers or is it always the same people who write your stories??

Thanks!!

Our Life: Beginnings & Always won’t be getting new writers, but we will be hiring a new team of writers for Our Life: Now & Forever eventually!

perhaps this counts as nsfw and I'm sure it has been answered before but what does Cove prefer, chests/boobs or butts? or perhaps both :3c thank you for this wonderful game (and the patreon bonus moment, it was worth all the waiting and more ♥) 

He’s a “chests of all shapes and sizes” kind of guy, haha.

i was wondering- did any of the writers actually grow up by the beach? as someone who's lived in a beach town all their life it really did feel nostalgic to play through our life 1 

I was born and raised in Cali! Though, not right by the beach. We still had to make trips out, but the setting is based on my own childhood memories of small beach towns we went through.

In Derek’s upcoming DLC, will we be able to reference the pact we made as teens? (love olba and xod/xobd so much btw you’re literally amazing) 

Yep, you will be able to talk about that!

Oh, sorry about the Cole being secretly L ask, then!

If you wanted context: Death Note is about this one guy who finds a notebook that kills anyone who you write the name of in there. The guy eventually develops a God Complex and starts mass killing criminals and stuff. L is the one trying to find out who is killing all these people.

Me and my sister first joked about it because I couldn't remember how to translate a word about the way Cove was sitting, so I just did the pose, and it looked a lot like how L himself sits! Then we just snowballed from there, with more and more nonsense connections.

That’s okay! Thanks for explaining. I’m sorry I didn’t know what you meant.

[goldenxchoices]

Choices LIs

I've done something like this before, but it was nearly three years ago, so it's time for an update. (Plus, I saw this floating around, and I was bored, so why not?)

Books with a single LI: I tend to default to the female version of any customizable LI, especially on a first playthrough. I'll sometimes romance a male LI with a male MC, but I rarely do m/f romances. The exception is A Very Scandalous Proposal; I don't like the Ava sprites, so I almost always choose Simon instead.

In this category, I like Trystan Thorne, Kieran, Dakota Winchester, Simon Montjoy, Manu Nakeli, and Kit Jackson. I feel pretty neutral toward Cassian Keane, Clarke, and Jacqueline Monroe. I don't like Sam Dalton. And the entire book Surrender can kindly fuck off.

Across the Void: Gonna be honest, despite having read this through at least twice, I wouldn't be able to tell you a thing about the LIs or their personalities. I think I went for Titania my first playthrough - or was it Kepler?

America's Most Eligible: Jen's my favorite here, though I'd like to try a run where I dump someone for Bianca.

Baby Bump: Myra.

Bachelorette Party: Aisha.

Big Sky Country: I love Juliette dearly, but sometimes my Hallmark-loving brain kicks in and I have to pick Sawyer.

Blades of Light and Shadow: All four are amazing and I love them. I love my ladies the best, but I have a soft spot for Tyril as well. I'd love a big polycule here.

Bloodbound: Kamilah takes the top spot, but Lily's a close second.

A Courtesan of Rome: Sabina and Syphax are tied as my favorites, and I'm becoming more fond of Cassius the more I play. I'd like Antony to go away forever, please.

The Crown and the Flame: For Kenna, I alternate between Val and Annelyse. For Dom, I prefer Sei.

Desire and Decorum: Annabelle, always.

Distant Shores: I actually tend to go for Edward here, surprisingly. Almost always with a male MC, though.

The Elementalists: Shreya or Aster.

Endless Summer: I've tried all four. With female MCs, I tend to lean toward Quinn. With male MCs, I like Estela or Sean.

Foreign Affairs: Either Tatum or Ayna.

The Freshman: Becca is my queen. I also like Kaitlyn and Zig, but it's hard to pass up Becca's route.

The Haunting of Braidwood Manor: Eleanor. Is there even really a choice here?

The Heist: Monaco: Sonia. This is one of the few instances where a guaranteed female character is written as the "main" love interest, and she's amazing and I love her romance route.

Hero: Eva.

High School Story: Emma or Maria.

High School Story: Class Act: Skye.

Home for the Holidays: Holly.

Hot Couture: Luz.

Immortal Desires: Both. Both is good.

It Lives Beneath: Probably Imogen or Tom.

It Lives in the Woods: Andy or Ava.

Laws of Attraction: Aislinn.

LoveHacks: Ben.

Mother of the Year: I love all three equally. I literally cycle through them each time I play.

My Two First Loves: I went for Ava the first time, but I really love Noah as well.

Nightbound: Vera or Cal.

Open Heart: Jackie and Rafael are my favorites, but I think Bryce is awesome as well. I can't stand the other guy.

Passport to Romance: Um... Marisa, I suppose?

Perfect Match: Hayden, Sloane, and Alana. Though sometimes I'll go for the entire polycule, because I can.

Platinum: No strong preference here. Maybe Raleigh? Though I like Shane's vibes as well.

Queen B: Zoey, with a dose of flirting with Poppy.

Red Carpet Diaries: Teja, I guess, though the whole series is sort of meh for me.

Ride or Die: Probably Mona's at the top, though I have enjoyed doing Colt and Logan runs before.

Rising Tides: No preference. Honestly, I don't even remember who I chose the first time.

The Royal Masquerade: Kayden. Mostly because of the looks thing, honestly.

The Royal Romance: Hana. Though if I could choose Olivia, I'd be all over that.

Rules of Engagement: Dean for the MC, and Mira for the Party Twin.

Save the Date: Lindsay or Simon.

Slow Burn: Still playing for the first time, but so far I think I prefer Julia.

Sunkissed: Eliana.

The Unexpected Heiress: Gemma.

Veil of Secrets: Kate and Naomi.

Wishful Thinking: Jaime.

Wolf Bride: Morgan. Go away, wolf dude.

[hannie-dul-set]

araw-araw [na jaemin]

(EVERY DAY)

part of “the puhon playlist” collection

SUMMARY | mahiwaga— someone or something that you’ll choose every single day no matter the circmstance. and for you, that was na jaemin. even if time decides to set you apart PAIRING | na jaemin x female! reader GENRE | childhood friends to lovers! au, college! au, romance, slow-ish burn, fluff, humor, tiny angst, biology major jaemin and art major mc HEHE WARNINGS | excessive swearing, insecurities, some sex jokes LMAO, i project a lot in this i’m sorry JSFJG WORD COUNT | 14.5k TAGLIST | @prettyjaems @lcvemark @shra-vasti @danishmiilk @probablygonnahurtsomebody @jccv @rebel-lious-alien @dalkomhanchocolateicecream @kthpurplesyou @fullsuhnshine​ @dejvns @nctzun @sweetjaemss @sehunniepot @wownajaemin @emoshishi @holywaterbetch @ukiyoneo @injunified @huangxx​ @jaehyunnie3​ @nct-writers​ @czennienet​ @neowritingsnet​ @kpopscape​

a/n: HERE IT IS.... MY PRIDE AND JOY JHSFJSD gahh okay i’m gonna keep my rambling to a minimum but this fic is very close and very dear to my heart and if it isn’t obvious that i’m in love with jaemin then this fic will make it obvious LMAO

also do yourself a favor and listen to ben&ben’s araw-araw on loop while reading this!! adds to the ~vibe~ hehe

Five-thirty-seven in the morning, grey clouds stretching throughout the sky as you peeked outside the window, falling right above oceans and buildings and people that you couldn’t even see. You sighed as you sank deeper into your chair, closing your eyes and adjusting your earbuds to clear your thoughts that were brought about by your sudden move.

You felt a nudge from beside you, coming from your mother (your dad was long knocked out since earlier), and so you politely pulled the earbuds away. “Excited to come back to Korea?” she asked. You simply responded with a smile and hum.

It wasn’t like you didn’t like the idea of returning— it was the prospect that it did not even feel like you were returning in the first place. Indifference was what you felt. After moving to Los Angeles when you were twelve because of your father’s job, you had to say goodbye to all your friends living in your hometown, all the traditions and customs that you were used to, and all the memories that you have built up in order to get used to a new environment. Seven years later when you thought you were just about to fit in with the west, your father comes out with the news of going back to Seoul again.

So it was difficult to manage a full smile.

You had a thought as you looked down through the window, recognizing a few of the landmarks that stood out: how strange it was to have somewhere that used to be home feel so foreign.

Just as you were about to put in your earbuds back in, your mother suddenly brightened, looking at you with a large smile on her face, eliciting your curious gaze.

“Oh! Do you still remember your old friend Jaemin?”

A smile tugged at your lips. How could you forget him?

Na Jaemin. Nana. Jaems. Your childhood best friend for six years until you were forcibly shipped all the way to LA. You still remembered how hesitant you were to tell him that you were moving because you didn’t want him to cry— only to have you crying and refusing to let go of him until your parent's pried you off of him at the airport. He assured you while wiping away your tears that you’d still get to see him one day.

Maybe that day would actually be one of these days.

“Yeah,” you mumbled, fiddling with the drawstrings of your jacket. “Why? I haven’t been in contact with him for years now.”

“His mom and I talked the other day and I told her that we’re moving back! And just earlier, she told me that Jaemin volunteered to pick us up from the airport so we won’t have to take a cab. Isn’t that great? You’d get to be reunited with your old friend again.”

“Ah,” you paused for a moment, in thought, just before pressing your lips together into a tight smile. “Yeah, it would be nice to see him again.”

That was what you said, but even until you left the plane, lugging your baggage across the cold floors of the airport with your music at full volume to drown out the noise, you were actually rather conflicted about meeting him again. A lot could happen within seven years, and therefore there was no assurance that things would still be the same. You weren’t sure if he’d still be the same sweet boy that was determined to fight the park swings after you fell and cried, if he’d still be the same kid that stopped talking to you for three days because you tricked him into eating a strawberry flavored lollipop. Maybe he’d still be, maybe he wouldn’t, but it was exactly that uncertainty that made you feel uneasy.

Still, there was still a hint of excitement, a string that tugged your heart away from all the uneasiness, just enough to bring a smile to your face at the thought of seeing him again.

“Y/N, let’s go?”

Your father called out to you and you didn’t even realize that you have actually stopped walking amidst your musings.

“Oh, yeah I—” you stumbled in between the ever moving airport crowd, looking down to see your shoelace had become undone, and so you let go of your suitcase. “You two go ahead, I’ll catch up in a sec!”

You ducked down, right beside the large, grey case to fix it, lips pursed in concentration. People passed by without minding you too much, but at one instance, just as you had finished retying your shoelace, your suitcase moved away from you with a shadow looming from above. Panic struck, and so you jolted up, instincts forcing your hand to move, quickly grabbing the handle. There was another hand resting on it. Your eyes moved up to meet with the culprit's.

Weirdly enough, he was just as shocked as you are.

Even weirder— he looked way, way too attractive to be a thief. Or maybe that was the modus these days? Still, you harshly dragged back the suitcase, ripping it away from his grasp with a glare. “What the fuck—”

At that moment, you recalled your mother’s words. Jaemin volunteered to pick us up from the airport. This guy looked a little too much like your old friend from your old neighborhood.

It felt like you were looking into the exact same large, dark eyes that used to be always accompanied by a pretty smile, now matched by a mouth hanging slightly agape from surprise. He even had the same dark hair that always messily fell over his eyes. There was a moment of pause in between the rush of bodies, the both of you in a frozen trance staring at each other until you had finally realized that motherfucker— this was Na Jaemin.

When did he get so hot?

“I—”

He flashed you a smile. The same damned smile. It brought you to the conclusion that seven years really didn’t do anything except make him far too attractive for his own good. All of a sudden you felt self-conscious about your own appearance as you gawked at him. God really liked to play favorites, huh?

You could see him say something, his lips moving just enough to represent a few words, but it was muffled thanks to the blaring music. Your confusion reflected clearly on your face contorting, and Jaemin only shook his head and laughed before reaching his hands to your face, bringing you to a momentary halt of haywire because what the actual fuck was he doing.

“You shouldn’t listen to music too loudly in public,” he said, pulling your earbuds out of your ears and gingerly placing them into your open palms with a smile. Holy fuck, his voice got so deep. “I’ve been calling out to you since earlier, but you couldn’t hear. Let’s go, your parents are waiting.”

Before you could even try to recollect yourself from the sudden crashing of events, Jaemin took your suitcase in your stead, leading you to his car.

If you still weren’t sure whether or not this was Na Jaemin from your past, you were now because although a bit watered down, he was just as excessively weird and sweet as he was ages ago. You found yourself feeling stupid for even doubting it in the first place. Of course, he was still the same; he even chirps your name in the same way as he always did before.

“There we go,” with a huff, the trunk came to a close. He threw your suitcase in there after seeing your mini struggle episode with far too little effort for your peace of mind. “You should just ask me next time. Okay, Y/N?”

“Thanks,” you gave him a small nod, flustered when he pinched your left cheek while making a questionable noise, and he opened the car door for you to enter.

Maybe it was you that had changed.

You were fairly quiet throughout the car ride while your parents and Jaemin decided to catch up after everything, only listening and giving your reactions whenever needed. You weren’t a morning person and your jetlag wasn’t doing you of any help either.

“You’re in your third year, right Jaemin?” your father asked, sitting at the front seat as your mother and you sat behind.

“Yep, yep,” he happily replied.

“Time really does fly fast, doesn’t it?” your mother joined in. “What uni do you go to, Jaemin?”

“Ah,” he sounded, eyes still directed on the road. “NCT U. It’s the closest at home, and I didn’t really wanna move out.”

“Oh, what a coincidence! Y/N isn’t that where you’re planning on going, too?”

“Really?” you could see Jaemin’s eyes brighten from the mirrors. “Y/N, do you want me to help you with your requirements? Have you enrolled already? I can give you a tour if you want!”

He’s really the same. You thought, smiling. “It’s fine, Jaemin. I already enrolled and took care of everything online.”

“But I should still tour you, though!” he retorted, the pout and whine evident in his voice. “The campus is really big so you might get lost. Ah, but aren’t universities in the States much bigger? I can also introduce you to some of my friends if you like.”

Jaemin went on for a while, telling your parents not to worry and promising that he’d take care of you throughout your college life here in Korea despite your protests that you could very much take care of your own self. Eventually, your mother asked about his major, and his animated expressions dimmed down into a slight bashfulness after answering that he was taking biology. You joined the conversation upon hearing that. “You said back then that you wanted to be a surgeon, right?”

With a shy smile, he nodded, and at that moment you felt a rush of awe for your childhood friend. Your parents seemed to have reacted the same way seeing as he was growing a little more embarrassed. It was amazing how he held on to the same dream he held since he was a kid— the amount of passion and dedication he must have for it. You on the other hand—

“What about you, Y/N?”

You jumped at the sudden subject switch. “Oh, I’m—” a pause in your statement. “I’m… taking an arts course.”

“Wow! As expected, Y/N is as cool as always,” he doted, which caused you to flush.

“It’s— it’s not really that amazing, it’s just the only thing I’m kinda good at so—”

“No, no, no. Y/N, you shouldn’t say that,” he scolded, clicking his tongue while his hands remained on the wheel. Your mother was beside you yet he was the one doing the mom nagging. “Who is that again? Bob Ross? Leonardo DiCaprio? You’re gonna be much much much better than them someday, I just know it! I have something called Nana vision, you know.”

You stifled a quiet laugh, not having the heart to correct him that it was not DiCaprio. “Does your Nana vision also see that we’re already almost at the complex?”

“Oh!”

At your words, Jaemin’s attention was now a hundred percent back on driving, profusely apologizing for getting distracted. You could see his ears slightly reddening from your seat which lasted until the end of the drive. Jaemin helped your family carry everything to your apartment on the eighth floor, even volunteering to help you unpack. Your mother firmly declined, however, insisting him to take a rest after all his help, but she did invite him and his parents over for dinner tomorrow. A little reunion of sorts.

“Six in the evening, right?”

“Yes. You should head back home now, Jaemin. Thank you for everything.”

He shot a bright smile before readying to march outside. “We’ll be here by five!”

She laughed at him, shaking her head, and proceeded to look for you inside the mess of the living room. You were about to disappear inside your room, luggage in hand to unpack, but she quickly dragged you back by the ear. “Go see him out the door!” she whisper-yelled, and so you did. Fortunately, he was stopped by your father before he got to leave, so you took this opportunity to smoothly stride beside him as he slipped past the door when he said goodbye. The door clicked to a close. He raised a brow at you.

“Mother’s orders,” you answered.

“So you wouldn’t have gone out if she didn’t tell you to?” he huffed, pouting. “And I was really happy to see you, too. I think I might have to take that back.”

You rolled your eyes at him, laughing, and eventually you made it to the end of the hallway. “Too late. You can’t take back your happiness. It’s good to see you again, Jaemin.”

The both of you stopped right in front of the elevator, and you waited for him to depart, but he didn’t. He had his arms crossed over his chest, accompanied by an expression on his face that you couldn’t quite tell if it was hurt, disappointment, or offense. Probably all three. Definitely all three.

“What? are you putting up a wall between us? Don’t I mean anything to you anymore?” he groused, nose scrunching. “What happened to Jaems? Nana? Y/N, you’re seriously hurting me over here.”

Laughing at the way he was sticking his frown right into your face to prove his point, you playfully shoved him off, pushing him into the elevator after all of his complaints even though he was the one moving his feet, anyway. You missed him, that much you could conclude, therefore you decided to stop his whining just before the elevator doors came to a close.

“See you tomorrow, Nana.”

You grinned, not missing the way his eyes lit up in between the small gap. You really did miss him, and you were lucky enough to have him as a small memory to remind you that this place was indeed home.

Maybe it wasn’t just Jaemin that you had missed. The entire family was just a smack in the face of early childhood nostalgia that you nearly cried (thank god you didn’t) when Mrs. Na buried you into a bone crushing hug the moment she saw you when you opened the door. You were really happy to be back— even when you weren’t exactly sure before.

“Mom, I think you’re suffocating, Y/N,” Jaemin pointed out as he left his shoes in front of your doorstep, walking inside with his father following behind him.

“Oh my, I’m so sorry, Y/N. I just couldn’t believe that this is you!” she coddled, and somewhere in between Jaemin found himself beside you. “I think I have pictures of you two when you were younger, hold on—”

Mrs. Na was pushed forward by her husband as she dug through her phone for a decade old Facebook posts of you and Jaemin (you hoped she wouldn’t remember you had an entire album). The older man ruffled your hair as he passed by with a fond smile, disappearing into the dining table where your parents were preparing and leaving you and Jaemin behind.

He was looking at you. Questionably so.

“What?”

“It’s not fair,” he whined. “I didn’t get to hug you yesterday.”

Oh my god, you shook your head, grabbing the sleeve of his mint jacket and leading him to where your parents were to help. “You’ll have more opportunities, you loser. It’s not like I’m going anywhere.”

Jaemin was speechless for a moment as he let you drag him along, but a happy smile broke through and he matched your steps halfway.

“Yeah,” he agreed. You weren’t going anywhere.

Dinner followed the usual sequence of events: reminiscing about the past, asking both parties what they have been up to, and of course talks about the future. During the meal, Jaemin asked when your classes were starting (next week), and he proposed his promised tour to be held this Tuesday— two days from now— because he didn’t have a lot of classes that day. He wouldn’t take no for an answer, neither did your parents, so you ended up agreeing.

Unfortunately for you, your mother pulled out the ancient photo album of the past right after dinner, and the stark contrast between yours and Jaemin’s reactions were also album worthy. By the end of it, you were sure that smoke was emitting from your ears because your good friend had an affinity with screaming over how cute you were, even going as far as stealing one of your baby pictures right before they decided to make their leave.

“Ah, ah,” he pulled the photo away the moment he sensed your attempt of theft. You two were standing right in front of the open door, his parents already having left ahead. “I’m keeping this. You look so cute here.”

“How am I so sure you won’t blackmail me with that!”

An offended gasp. “I would never,” he took out his phone, inserting your picture inside his colored phone case with you watching his every move. “It’s for me to see only, so you don’t need to worry.”

You looked at him. Then to the phone that he was holding up with a confident smile. You let out a sigh.

“Fine,” you begrudgingly relented, and he waddled over to you with a big smile on his face to envelop you into a hug. He smells nice, you thought, reciprocating the embrace. Wait, isn’t this my perfume? That would explain what he was doing inside your room earlier. You could only sigh inwardly let him keep on hugging you. He was whining about it earlier, after all.

It lasted long, maybe a bit too long because his dad came back to fetch him.

“Mhm, you can trust me with anything, Y/N,” Jaemin mumbled before finally pulling away, his hands still resting on your shoulders as he did. “Anyway, before I go— should we exchange phone numbers?”

Tuesday came by, and you were met with two realizations. Both of which made you feel very very small in comparison.

One, NCT U was really freaking big.

Two, Na Jaemin was really freaking popular.

Granted, he had only shown you around the STEM department, but with every turn that you took and every hallway that you passed through, there was least one person that stopped by to say hi to him. Even some of the teachers were close with him. You should have expected it considering he was literally nice, smart, handsome, and everything you could ever ask for, but it still made him feel just a tiny bit out of reach.

“Are you feeling tired?” he asked, breaking away from a conversation with a senior. He put a hand over your shoulder with concern that reflected in his eyes. “We can take a break around the benches if you want.”

“Yeah, sure. After you—”

“I’ll talk to you later, hyung. See you around.”

Jaemin waved off his older friend, Yuta, you had overheard, and proceeded to lead you to the aforementioned area on the ground floor before stopping by a vending machine to get some drinks. You pressed your lips together, feet shuffling as you waited behind him, and then you finally decided to speak. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“Do what?” he asked, slotting in a few coins into the machine.

“You— you with your friend,” you fumbled, trying your best to speak your mind, but how were you supposed to say ‘cut your conversation short with your friend because of me’ without seeming like a total headass? You could have waited until they were finished.

With a soft smile, he passed a canned, carbonated drink into your hands— lemon, you read— and took one for himself. He didn’t answer your incomprehensible question and decided to walk across the field leading to a bench area, but you were sure he got what you were trying to say. He simply chose not to answer. Or did he? Hell, you didn’t even know anymore. Annoyed, you decided to gulp down the drink in one go to distract yourself, even when the bubbles stung your throat. Jaemin stared at you in horror.

“Were you that thirsty? You should have told—”

“Na Jaemin!”

In sync, your heads snapped towards the direction of the ear-ripping screech, which was quite coincidentally where you two were headed. There were two boys sitting on a bench, one more on the table with a guitar. You assumed that it was one of them that screamed out your friend’s name— probably the one that was making eye contact with him before dramatically turning away with a butchered sob.

“Na Jaemin! Traitor of the brotherhood! I remember when he would still come running the moment I call his name but now— forgotten for dust! He doesn’t care about us anymore, Renjun. He even has a new—”

“What are you on about this time, Haechan?”

Haechan’s evidently fake sobbing stopped, pushing away the boy that he had just been crying into moments prior. “Oh you’re here,” he deadpanned.

It was almost horrific how three pairs of eyes immediately zeroed in on you as you meekly hid behind Jaemin, causing the hairs at the back of your neck to stand as if you were about to die in a fucking horror movie. You could tell from that alone that despite having many friends, these guys were probably his closest— whether it was better or worse, you had no idea. All of a sudden you were dawned with the intimidating task of trying to get them to like you, which was already way too out of reach because the one with the guitar was practically ripping you to shreds with his eyes alone.

“Please stop trying to scare, Y/N. Jeno, you might actually make her cry, stop that.”

“Whoops,” Jeno stopped his death staring. “Hyuck initiated it.”

“Actually it was Renjun, but whatever,” before Renjun could even bite back after being falsely accused, Haechan had already blocked him off and had directed his attention towards you, legs crossed and a critical gaze. “Fuck formalities. Y/N, right? Who are you and why are you trying to steal—”

“Alright, no more scare tactics. Y/N, there are my friends, Jeno, Haechan— or Donghyuck, whichever you prefer, he doesn’t mind— and Renjun. They’re just trying to mess with you, don’t worry. Friends, this Y/N L/N, my childhood friend for like four, five years before she left Korea and moved to LA.”

The term childhood friend lit a spark within the three boys, but before they could do or say anything dangerous that would jeopardize your relationship, Jaemin the ever popular boy was called out by a group of girls. He excused himself to leave for a moment, but not before apologizing to you a million times over (“If you’re really sorry,” Renjun chided before he ran off. “Treat us and Miss Y/N to Kun’s, yeah?”). He agreed without even hearing him properly, and now you were left with his three friends that felt more like three sharks that circled around you. They were fucking out for blood.

“So,” the moment Jaemin disappeared from the parameter, Haechan pulled you to the bench in between him and Renjun with a devilish grin. “Childhood friend, huh?”

Your eyes snapped over to Renjun who was on your right to ask for a way out of this, but the guy was busy filming the entire thing on his phone. Why did Jaemin leave you behind? You had no chance of escaping. Haechan locked you down by swinging his arm around your neck just as you were about to stand. He signalled at his friend who was sitting on the table. “Jeno, drop the beat.”

There was a moment of miscommunication in between because instead of dropping the beat like Haechan asked, Jeno started strumming a sickeningly sweet tune on his guitar. Or maybe that was what he intended. Either way, Haechan was flexible enough to go along with it.

“You know what they say about childhood friends,” another strum. Haechan sang. Was this a fucking oration? “You either end up forgetting each other, hating each other, or you end up toge—”

“That is not—”

“Hush!” he silenced. Renjun was losing it at the side. So was Jeno, because the guitar tune was long replaced by fits of strangled laughter. “It is, clueless Y/N. It is. How many childhood friends have you met that stayed as childhood friends? None, I assume. I’m never wrong, you see.”

“Weren’t you and Mark childhood friends, too—”

“Shut the fuck up, Huang. This isn’t about me. Y/N, listen.”

Grabbing your shoulders, Haechan pulled you away from Renjun, the sudden movement nearly giving you a whiplash.

“From my expert calculations, you and Jaemin are undeniably going down route three, but the both of you are moving at an agonizingly slow pace, correct?” you stared at him, wide eyed, and he was staring right back. “Correct! Now, in order to speed things up a bit, all you have to do is follow Hyuck’s five step guide on How To Trap Your Childhood Friend Into—”

“Isn’t this the same guide that ruined your—”

“I said shut the fuck up!”

The two ended up quarrelling and you ended up being forgotten. You weren’t sure whether to be thankful or be offended. Jeno shot you a look of remorse on behalf of his friends, bringing you to the conclusion that this must have been a normal occurrence. Your eyes shot towards the sky, clouds covering the sun just enough so you wouldn’t be blinded, ears picking up the argument occuring that went back and forth on both of your sides. They’re a lively bunch, you breathed out, a subtle smile on your face.

Eventually Jaemin showed his face again, jogging over to your group and you greeted him with a beaming grin. “You guys seem to be getting along,” he said the moment he stopped before you.

“Oh, Romeo returns,” Renjun decided to stop picking a fight with Haechan. “Where’d you get dragged off to this time?”

There was silence, all four sets of eyes heavily sparked with curiosity as you waited for Jaemin’s response, but the boy was rather hesitant. “Well—” he fumbled, a faint baby pink blush powdering his cheeks. Sheepish, he continued. “Someone confessed to me.”

The first person that reacted was Jeno, who released a loud snort and scooted a little more forward. “Shouldn’t you be used to it by now?” Jaemin indignantly refuted as he continued to be teased by the other two boys, the remaining uncharacteristically not joining in. At that very moment you could feel Haechan looking at you, a gaze that you couldn’t quite put a finger on but it was enough to shoot him a glare back.

“Who was it? Is she pretty?” you chose to ignore the annoying male beside you and decide to focus all of your interest and attention on Jaemin instead.

“Jiah,” he mindlessly answered, pushing Haechan to the side so he could sit next to you. “From nursing? I think?”

“Dude,” you turned your head to Renjun. “Kang Jiah? Holy shit, that’s crazy.”

Noticing the lost look in your eyes, Renjun proceeded to explain that not only was the alluded Kang Jiah arguably the prettiest in her department, she was at the top of her class too. You didn’t understand which part about that was crazy because for you, that was exactly the kind of person that Jaemin was destined to end up with. You wouldn’t be surprised if they do become a thing— well, there was only one way to find the answer to that.

“Well, what did you say? You said yes right?” you asked him, looking forward to his answer.

“Oh,” he shrugged. “I turned her down.”

What?

“Of course,” Renjun scoffed, shaking head with his arms crossed. “Only you would turn someone like Jiah down. At this rate you’ll end up dying an old hermit.”

“You have a crush on her or something?”

“Pff— no? I just think she’s pretty,”

“You’re not fooling anyone, dumbass. Come over here, I’m gonna squeeze it out of you—”

While the two quarrelled again in the middle of the field with Jeno being the one filming this time, you remained frozen in your seat, somewhat surprised. Huh, you blinked, wanting to ask him why he turned her down but frankly it was none of your business. You turned your head to face him. “Wow, I didn’t expect you to turn into such a heartbreaker, Jaems.”

He clicked his tongue, face scrunched into a bitter look of disapproval as reached out to mess up your hair. “Stop thinking weird thoughts,” he scolded. “Instead, why don’t I finally take you to the art building?”

Your eyes immediately lit up after the mention, and he stifled a laugh at your reaction, patting your head once more before sneaking off without the other three’s knowledge.

Jaemin’s tour of the whole campus actually deemed to be pretty useful because after three whole weeks of going to NCT U, you’d only gotten lost seven times— pretty remarkable if you do say so yourself. Within those three weeks, you had actually expected that your old childhood friend would leave you off on your own once you got used to everything, but no. He tried his best to meet you in between classes even though your buildings were nowhere near each other, and the times when he couldn’t, he’d never failed to call or text you. “I promised your parents!” he reasoned, but you weren’t sure if that promise included asking you if you’ve eaten breakfast every morning.

“Breakfast?”

You repeated into the phone as you and your recently made friend Soorim walked to your Visual Studies class. You’d met her during your first week and the both of you immediately hit off. It was nice to have someone else other than Jaemin and his friends, but of course you appreciated their company, too.

“I, uh, actually haven’t eaten— no wait! Before you nag me, I have a valid excuse, okay!” Soorim gave you a sidelong glance, curious and suspicious over your loud phone call so she tried to lean her ear closer to the device but you quickly evaded without even looking at her. “Listen, I was in a hurry to school! I actually planned on grabbing a bite on the way but I… forgot my wallet because again, I was in a hurry and— no, shut up, you don’t have the right to scold me for this, too! You literally left your report at home yesterday and I had to walk all the way back to save your butt so you’re no better, Mr. Na.”

Without even realizing, you were already in front of the doors to your classroom, and so you hurried a goodbye to Jaemin just before you and Soorim took your seats at the near back.

“Alright, I’m in the classroom now. See you later. Yes, I’ll eat after, yes, I promise to double check my wallet from now on. Bye.”

The moment you settled on your seat, setting your phone and backpack aside, Soorim swiveled her chair to face you, legs crossed, hands resting with poise on her thigh, and she batted her eyelashes expectantly. You ignored her, twisting open your water bottle because it was the only thing you had that could somewhat silence your crying stomach.

“So,” she started anyway. The bottle opening was hovering over your lips. You narrowed your eyes at her. What the fuck was she doing. “When are you introducing me to your boyfriend?”

You choked while drinking.

“Boy— what,” with a grimace, you ripped away the bottle from your face, slamming it down on the table. You looked at your friend in disgust. “If I had one I wouldn’t be hanging out with you.”

Soorim rolled her eyes, sneering at you. She held up her hand to the side of her face, all fingers closed except for her pinky and her thumb, shaking it a little. You sighed.

“He’s a friend.”

“The same friend that kept on calling you during our night out because he was worried?”

“Yes, well,” your sweat dropped. “He’s just like that, you know?”

“Sure,” she scrunched her nose, haphazardly throwing her giant notebook on the table. There was a brief moment of quiet that overtook because Soorim decided to stop egging on you as you waited for your professor, but that quiet only lasted for a while. She nudged you, and you looked up from your desk. “Oh, look who's coming.”

Huang Renjun sauntered in with an expression not fitting for a “good morning” greeting, so you chose to remain silent and simply stare at him in judgment as he settled right before you and Soorim, plastic bag in hand and binder in the other. What shat in his coffee this early in the morning?

“This is all your fault,” with a grunt, he dropped the bag filled with all sorts of food and snacks right in front of you, immediately pulling out a chair and sitting his ass onto it after. “My plans of turning up late are ruined because of you.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, picking out a small container of strawberry milk from the bunch. How was this your fault? Furthermore, what exactly was all of this?

“Ooh, you making moves on Y/N, Huang?” Soorim, on the other hand, was digging into the rest of the goods, stealing a bun filled with red bean paste with a happy smile.

“Ew, as if.”

Renjun fake gagged, earning a look of offense from you which he completely ignored and disregarded. He took a box of pepero from the pile, shooting you a smug look before adding.

“It’s from Nana.”

(“You’re at school already? It’s very early. You’ve eaten breakfast, right?”

At a convenience store nearby the school, Jaemin and Renjun decided to eat their first meal there. Though, it appeared that the latter was the only one doing all the eating because his friend seemed to be far too preoccupied with his conversation on the phone to even notice that he took some of his sushi right in front of his face. Renjun silently chewed as he watched the colors on his friend’s face change at each sentence.

“Aish, it’s the most important meal of the day for a reason. How many times do I have to tell you—”

Another piece of sushi stolen. He wondered how far he could get away with it.

“Y/N, I—”

Jaemin let out a long sigh, causing Renjun to drop the food back onto the plate, retracting his chopsticks back to his own food— a bowl of ramen noodles that he had still yet to finish. He discreetly slurped it down as if he hadn’t been stealing since earlier. He was sure that Jaemin noticed though, but knowing his friend, he probably just let him. Renjun noticed the small pout on Jaemin, eliciting his curiosity.

“Okay,” he’s whining, Renjun concluded. “See you later.”

The moment Jaemin shut off his phone, Renjun expected him to say something, to air out why the fuck he was being all that this early in the morning, maybe even tell him what the call was about like a friend would, but no. Instead, Jaemin promptly stood up from his seat, disappeared into the limited selection of isles in the store, basket in hand, and started throwing a mountain full of food with a scrunched out, concentrated expression. Renjun had his mouth hanging open, brows knitted together, and wondering what in the ever loving fuck was going on with his friend as he stared at him pay for everything at the counter.

He sat back, eyeing Jaemin as he returned in front of him, who placed the full bag on top of the table as he took a seat.

“The hell?” a particular carton caught Renjun’s eye, and he immediately fished for it in primal disbelief. “Strawberry milk? You literally hate strawberries and milk separately yet you’re buying them combined? Are you sick?”

Jaemin did not answer. In fact, he dismissed the question completely with a smile, deciding to ask one of his own.

“It’s almost time for your first class, right? Visual Studies?”

At that point it hit him— the call, the food, the stupid behavior of his friend. It was completely obvious.

“Oh,” Renjun dropped the drink back onto the table. “Oh my god, you’re so fucking whipped.”)

“Shut up.”

After hearing Renjun’s story, you couldn’t look at all the multicolored snacks laid in front of you without heating up a million degrees anymore. It was ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.

“You’re just messing with me, shut up.”

Renjun scoffed. “Why would I even make up something so stupid? C’mon, Y/N. You know I’m way better than that.”

You couldn’t argue that this wasn’t something Jaemin would do. No, because this was exactly something sickly sweet Jaemin would do and your sad attempt of denial was simply because your heart might actually run away if you admit it to yourself. And as if to give you more assurance or to fluster you even further, your phone vibrated, causing you to jump in your seat. Before either of the two’s nosiness could take a peek, you quickly snatched your phone, leaning your chair all the way back to read the message.

[<nana3: never skip breakfast okok?!? u don’t have your wallet right? wait for me in front of the bio building later. let’s eat lunch together 🥰💚]

Dear lord Jesus, have mercy on your soul. Renjun took your squeak as a sign of victory.

“Wait a minute,” Soorim looked at you wide in a sudden moment of epiphany. “Nana as in Na Jaemin? The fucking Na Jaemin? Is he the friend you’ve been mentioning? The guy you were calling and bought all this? Holy fuck, Y/N—!”

Your body moved before you could think and you thanked god that your professor wasn’t here yet because you would have caught the entire class’ attention when you leaped forward to slap your hands over Soorim’s mouth.

Renjun’s excessive giggling brought you back to reality, pulling your hands off of her with a gasp and an apology. “Oh gosh, I’m so sorry.”

“What the fuck, why did you do that?”

“I don’t know, it felt like you were about to say something stupid!”

She gave a look, half done and half amazed at your willpower. You’d never been this fired up for anything. “Is it stupid to say that one of the hottest guys on campus is literally—”

“Stupid!” another slap on her mouth. Renjun was about to fall off his chair laughing. “You were going to say something stupid. Please don’t even think about finishing that.”

Lucky for you, your professor had finally come in. Unlucky for you, Soorim shot you the signature dirty stare which meant that you wouldn’t be let off that easily. How fun.

Class went on quiet and boring as usual— you’d never been one for technicalities, preferring heading straight into the creative process with nothing but inspiration coursing through your veins, so your professor’s voice was nothing but white noise running in the background as you busied yourself with your thoughts. Your eyes flickered to the floor, cheek resting on your palm, and you gazed down to the plastic back beside your backpack. Twirling your pencil between your fingers, you pulled out a scrap piece of paper, every move that you made triggered by nothing except the abstract flow of your mind.

There was only one person you were thinking of. The same person living inside your head the moment you stepped foot back into Korea, the same person that made you feel as if you were someone special out of all the eight billion people in the world, the same person that bought you three persons worth of food because he didn’t want you skipping breakfast, the same person that felt more like a dream than anything.

Mindlessly, you started sketching the face of your childhood friend, filling in all the details of his face that you could see whenever you closed your eyes, up until the bell rang that signalled the end of the class.

“Y/N! Your father and I are leaving, now!”

“There’s extra money on top of the fridge if you want to eat out.”

Saturday evening. Your parents decided to go out on a well-deserved date that night, leaving you alone inside your apartment. You saw them out the door, locking it up once they left, and as you pressed your back against the white washed wooden door, your eyes darted over to the clock hanging on your living room wall. Six-twenty-three. There were still a few hours until closing.

An art exhibition was to be held on the same evening, and this was the last day that the actual artist was going to be there. Free and you got to meet world renowned artist Ten Lee? You’d be insane not to go. Though, as you made your way into your room to change out of your raggedy old sweatpants and Jaemin’s (stolen) mint hoodie, you’d come to a realization that maybe the venue was too far for you to just walk. Your parents were using the car and it wasn’t like you could drive anyway. You could commute, but there was a better idea in your system.

Opening your phone, a smile involuntarily tugged at the corners of your mouth as you pressed the contact number that seemed to have never left your recents.

[you: nana! are you free rn? there’s an art exhibition out of town! i need a ride :p and you need some time off your studies too bcs i noticed youve been more tired than usual so good idea i think yes hehe]

As usual, he took no more than a minute to reply. But after lighting up when you saw his name flash on your screen, you bit down your bottom lip to prevent a frown from forming.

[<nana3: TT i’m attending a seminar for an org rn y/nie huhu i don’t know what time it’s ending so i’m not sure if i can make it 😫😭]

[you: it’s okay!! jhfdj sorry for disturbing u!! please listen well to the speaker hehe and tell me how it went]

[<nana3: i’m so sorry]

It was difficult to pinpoint how you exactly felt.

You chewed the inside of your mouth, staring at the phone screen. He shouldn’t be apologizing.

After shutting your closet door down to a close, you fell face down onto your bed, your phone thrown over to the side. Yes, you were disappointed, but it wasn’t what weighed you down; the actual reason feeling like a disgusting, throbbing feeling writhing underneath your skin after being suppressed for awhile now. It never left your system the moment you'd arrived, the moment he showed you what his life was like, making you realize the stark difference between you and him.

You couldn’t care less about the exhibition now. In fact, fuck that entire plan entirely. As you were loitering, fooling around, planning on going to pointless events that wouldn’t be of benefit to your future, Jaemin was there, making connections and decisions and taking a step further into life.

It made you wonder what exactly had you been doing these past seven years— what haven’t you been doing, what you should be doing. You were ashamed to admit it, but it plagued the back of your mind since you got here.

Jaemin was far too out of reach.

It made the wrench in your gut worse whenever he made an effort to not make you feel that way. He’d always include you whenever he’d be with his other friends, always made sure that you didn’t feel left out since you came here, whether it be by his little cute texts even though you were in the same room just to make you smile, or by giving you all of his attention despite the many people vying for his. God, you didn’t deserve him. You didn’t deserve to like him.

What did you deserve?

Just then, there was a knock on your front door, followed by a buzz from your phone.

[<nana3: open the door!]

And you did, scrambling out of your bed and nearly tripping over your feet as you ran just to swing it open. Jaemin stood before you with his hair tousled by the wind, a purple and orange varsity jacket covering his frame. He greeted you with brightened eyes.

“I thought you had—”

“I left early,” he smiled at you, walking inside. “Why aren’t you dressed yet? Hurry, I’ll wait here.”

You blinked at him as he passed you by to sit on your couch, unable to understand what led him to such a decision, staring as he stretched his arms over his head with a yaw. He shouldn’t have come here. “Jaemin, it’s just an exhibition, it’s not as important as your seminar.”

He raised a brow at you, stealing a pillow into his lap. “But you want to go, right?”

“Well…” you did want to go, even after your small episode earlier. “Yeah, but—”

“Then it’s more important.”

He smiled at you. You cursed at yourself for letting your heart dither.

“Besides, you actually think I’d let you go out alone this late at night?” Jaemin stood up from the sofa, resting his hand on top of your head with an affectionate gaze. “You should go change. Or maybe not. You look good in my clothes, anyway.”

It was cold outside, so Jaemin made sure that you were wearing enough layers so that you won’t get sick, forcing you back inside when he deemed that you weren’t covered enough.

“Jaem, I’m fucking sweating.”

You huffed as you lugged yourself to the front seat, but your padded winter coat was preventing you from making a smooth landing inside.

“Sweating is a good sign! That means you’re healthy,” noticing your struggle, Jaemin relented to leaving the coat at the back of the car, but keeping it there just in case. He got in after you, starting the car and turning on the radio for some background noise. “Reconnaissance Gallery Right? What’s the name of the show?”

“Mono,” you replied. “It’s by Ten Lee.”

“Oh! I remember you talking about him once,” he exclaimed. “We should hurry then.”

It was a generally quiet car ride, but the silence was welcomed. After asking where you wanted to eat dinner once you were done with the exhibit, Jaemin didn’t talk anymore. Your eyes followed the moving lights that were lit up all around the night scene, and from time to time they flickered over to admire the boy beside you who seemed to be far too engrossed with his driving. An unconscious smile grew, warmth fluttering inside. You were lucky enough to meet him again in this lifetime, even after being set apart for so long.

“Something wrong?”

He asked without looking. He must have noticed you staring.

“No,” you replied with a soft voice. “Just remembered how baby-faced you were back then.”

With a laugh, he shook his head, one hand stretched out to the steering wheel. “You’re one to talk. Alright, I think we’re here.”

You felt a rush the moment you went past the glass doors, met by a relatively large interior with walls painted either black or white and lined with numerous paintings that contrasted the wall they were hung on. With a large grin, you quickly tugged Jaemin’s arm deeper into the venue, your footsteps making hollow echoes inside the place. He was taken aback by your sudden action, heart racing when he felt your grip on him, never slowing down even when you stopped in front of one of the larger works in the exhibit. “Oh my gosh, I love this painting— wait let me take a picture.”

As you fumbled with your phone, Jaemin couldn’t help but stare at you as if you were a part of the exhibit itself. There were more people inside, yet he didn’t even notice them; paintings as pretty as the night sky, yet it was you that he couldn’t take his eyes off of. Your phone camera captured it with an audible click, and he took it as a signal to scramble and take his out too.

Click!

“The painting’s really pretty, right?”

He nodded at you. “Yeah,” it wasn’t the painting that he wanted to capture. He dug his phone back into his pocket after sneaking a brief glance at your excited grin behind the screen. It wasn’t every day that you smiled like this since you were usually reserved. He didn’t want to miss saving a memory. “You wanna walk around more?”

At his suggestion, you and Jaemin decided to move deeper into the exhibit. You knew he wasn’t that knowledgeable about art, but he still listened intently whenever you told him something about the strokes and composition of some of the works displayed. You hadn’t run into Ten Lee yet even after an hour of walking around and taking pictures, but you didn’t mind at all. Jaemin froze in front of a certain painting— the visage of what seemed to be a face formed together by different objects, drawn in a style similar to the rest with the black and white motif, graffiti-esque structure, and the overall whimsical and abstract feel to it. There was a smile on his face, you wondered what he was thinking about.

“One day, it’s gonna be your paintings that will be displayed here. You promise you won’t forget about me when that happens, okay?" he started, turning his attention to you. “You should also paint a portrait dedicated to me," he joked, nudging you a little.

You smiled at him. Jaemin noticed that this wasn’t your usual smile, but he chose to not say anything. “Okay,” you breathed out before looking down seconds before he could see your expression melt away. How was he thinking so highly of you when it was him who was too far to reach?

He was about to ask— he didn’t know what to ask— but he would say whatever just to erase whatever was bothering your peace of mind. But he wasn’t able to. In fact, just as he lifted a hand to rest over your shoulder as an act of comfort, your head shot up, turning to face the sudden eruption of a commotion that Jaemin had failed to notice in his worry for you.

“Holy crap,” you gasped. “Is that—”

Ten Lee, just a few feet away from you with cameras and crowd surrounding him. You wasted no time to run to him, grabbing Jaemin’s hand in a flash to drag him behind. His eyes softened upon seeing the excited bounce of your hair as you ran. At least your spirits were brought back up again.

Jaemin watched as you nervously fiddled with the hem of your jacket as you waited for an opening to talk to the famous artist, how you would stand on your toes to peek above the small crowd and stand back down again after feeling too shy. Eventually the crowd dissipated to only around four or five people. This was your chance. You looked at him Jaemin. He nudged you with his shoulder. ‘Go,’ he mouthed. You pressed your lips together before finally deciding to march up to the artist. He didn’t realize you have been holding his hands until you let go.

“A-ah, hi!”

He followed after you in case you were feeling too nervous, but he was relieved to see that Ten Lee was pretty down to earth and easy going for someone famous. He stayed a few steps behind you as he listened to the ongoing conversation.

“I can’t tell you enough how much I adore your works. Especially, Monarch! I took a picture of it earlier and it’s so much more captivating in person,” you said, watching as Ten signed your phone case. “Actually, I—I look up to you a lot as an artist. A few of my paintings were actually inspired by your style, but of course it— it would be an insult to compare.”

“You shouldn’t compare,” he scolded, adding in a little sermon about your art is yours and that it should stand alone as your own. He handed your phone back, a smile on his face. “Can I see?”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. In a flustered rush, you quickly scrolled through your gallery folders to find the specific paintings you were referring to, and Jaemin, out of curiosity, hovered over your shoulders to see as well. As you passed through your works with your friend’s mouth hanging open in awe (he wanted to gush about them, but figured this wasn’t formally appropriate), his eyes caught a glimpse of an image that you quickly swiped past— far too glaring too miss because he was sure that it looked something like his face. It was a different kind of pride that he felt when he saw that.

Ten’s eyes flickered as he saw through your paintings, something formulating within even after you hid your phone. He looked at you, grabbing your hands without any warning which caused you to squeak. “Y/N, right?” you nodded, wide eyed. “You know, I’m hosting an online gallery within the upcoming weeks. It’s for young, aspiring artists like you to be recognized at a larger scale.”

Hold on, you tried to catch on to what he was saying. Was he—

“Are you interested?”

—serious? Was he actually serious? It looked like he was because when he let go of you, a business card suddenly materialized in your hands. Holy shit.

“Think about it, okay? Just email me your portfolio and everything. Who knows, what if you get recognized and scouted after this?”

He winked at you, shooting you a thumbs up. This had to be a dream. You were still trying to process the piece of fucking paper that you were holding and now all of a sudden Ten came in between you and Jaemin, swinging his arms around your neck and giving you a pat on the back

“Anyhow, thanks to the both of you for coming to my show. And Y/N—” he looked at you with a grin. “Looking forward to your more of your works.”

Ten disappeared off with two other people, their footsteps clacking against the cold, tiled floor. You stared at the card in your hands for a few moments— Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul, it wrote— before snapping your eyes back to Jaemin who was wearing a far too large smile. “Oh my god.”

Jaemin wasted no time in drowning you into a hug, knocking the air out of your lungs when he nearly toppled you onto the ground.

“Y/N,” his voice was soft in comparison to the roughness of his actions, sweetly fluttering into your ears as he rocked you left and right with his squeezing embrace. “I’m so proud of you.”

His words nearly broke you down to tears.

“This calls for a celebration, right?” he pulled away, hand automatically falling to hold onto yours as he led you to the gallery’s exit. “My treat! I know a place nearby, we should eat an entire feast!”

“Nana, you already treated me to lunch last time, I can’t just—”

“No, no no! I’m treating you, okay? This is your achievement so I should congratulate properly.”

There was no point arguing with him when he already had his mind set, but even during your drive to a nearby barbecue place, even when you were already halfway with the meal, you kept on insisting that you’d pay him back for all of this someday. He’d only laugh it off, telling you that he doesn’t mind as long as you’re enjoying yourself. You downed a shot of soju after hearing that, hoping that it would make you forget momentarily about how fast your heart was beating.

Somehow the clock eventually struck nine, and rather than going home, the both of you took an impulsive detour to a nearby public beach. The sounds of waves crashing against the solemn quiet of the night was heard as you neared the area, bringing you to a moment of peace.

Instead of going to the sandy shore, you two decided to take a spot on the beach cliff right above the rolling water. “Be careful,” Jaemin whispered from behind as he guided you along the rocky surface, heating up from the way he was so, so close with his hands steady on your back. You two sat side by side on the cliff, underneath the veil of stars, with the ocean right in front of you.

“Are your parents okay with you staying out this late?” he cocked his head to face you in a manner that was far too cute for you to suppress a giggle.

“Jaems, they’d probably allow me to disappear off to Italy as long as you’re with me.”

The both of you broke into laughter, but it was eventually replaced by the noises of the ocean. You breathed in the salty scent of the sea, folding your knees to your chest with your arms hugging them together. For a moment your eyes flickered over to Jaemin, and a chord was strung, tugging your heart towards him, but it was impossible for it to leap out of your chest so it only rattled against your ribcage desperately just like the waves. You stared at the way his dark hair melted into the night sky, the wind brushing it away, the way he had his legs stretched out freely over the rocks while you squeezed yourself as small as you could get, and lastly, the way he flashed over to look at the exact moment that you wanted him to.

If there was such a thing as a perfect instance where the stars of the night sky aligned, it would be this.

“You know,” you started, letting your arms fall to your sides as you looked over to the distance. “I envy you sometimes.”

Jaemin was taken aback by your confession.

“I also admire you,” you pressed your lips together tightly, forming it into a smile. “A lot. I admire you a lot. To the point that it made me feel like you’re living in a completely different world from me and that I wasn’t deserving of you.”

You’d finally mustered up the courage to tell him everything you’d pent up during your first month back here— it was better than just letting it fester into something worse, even if there was a risk of completely ruining your friendship. It was better than playing pretend.

“We’re both only a year apart but it seems like you have your life all tied together while I’m still barely able to walk on my own two feet. I wouldn’t even have been able to go to the exhibit if it weren’t for you,” you crossed your legs, a mirthless laugh slipping past your lips as the wind brushed against your cheeks .“I don’t… want to seem ungrateful for everything you’ve done or make you feel bad or anything, because Jaemin—”

You turned around, looking at him.

“If I had the choice to stay back then, I would have gladly chosen to spend those seven years together with you.”

Jaemin stared at you, speechless, unblinking. He had a gut feeling that there was something bothering you all this time, but he never had thought that it would be this.

“But the feeling of seeing you again after all this time is a feeling that I wouldn’t trade for the world either,” you hummed, looking down as you traced the creases of the rocky ground with your fingers, a shaky breath slipping past you. “If only… I wasn’t just so insecure then maybe everything would be perfect.”

For a moment there was nothing— only the lulling sounds of the sea that became quieter after you laid your heart out to the ground. The next moment, Jaemin spoke up.

“I got into an accident four years ago.”

You shot up in a single instant.

Jaemin laughed a little, bringing his hand to the crown of your head in assurance. “I had a herniated disc which got worse during a dance camp. It was definitely scary, how it seemed like I was in a standstill for two years while everyone else carried on with their lives,” he continued, letting his hand drop once more right beside yours. “It’s hard to get out of that hopeless mentality. It takes small steps, but once you do, things will eventually start looking up.”

He shot you a smile, eyes twinkling under the light of the moon. You couldn’t help but put your head down after hearing everything.

“I understand how and why you’re feeling that way, don’t worry I’m not upset. You don’t think I am, right?” he caught you sniffling, leaning forward to take a look at your face but you kept on turning away. “Y/N— Y/N, look at me, okay? I’ll be your personal cheerleader from now on, yeah? Up until you realize that you’re actually greater than you think you are.”

He was too good to you.

“I’m— I’m sorry I couldn’t be there when you were having a tough time.”

You silently muttered, meekly sneaking a glance at him to see that he was actually smiling at you this entire time. He’d always been like this.

“It’s alright, you didn’t have a choice, right?” he assured. “And I’m all better now, as you can see. I can even jump off the cliff into the ocean without having a single scratch!”

Right, you managed a laugh from his silly proclamation. He lit up upon hearing you. Maybe you can try to be like that too.

“What’s important is that from now on.”

There had been a gap between the two of you that entire time, but Jaemin bridged it the moment his hand brushed against your skin, his pinky interlocking with yours against the coarse ground. You met his eyes. He shot you a smile. That same smile that you could never get enough of.

“You’ll be with me.”

“Jaemin, please put your shirt back on.”

When you walked back into the living room, easel and canvas in your arms, you did not expect to be met with your childhood friend-slash-boyfriend mid-strip. In fact you were far too in shock that you dropped everything to the floor at that exact moment, only managing to utter those previous words once you were busy picking them all back up and not looking at him. He quickly ran to help you.

“Oh, I thought this was—” he passed you a paintbrush, helping you stand back up once you’ve gotten everything. “Aren’t the models for your classes usually, like, naked?”

“You think I was gonna paint you nude?!”

“Well,” he mused, holding his shirt to his bare chest. “If you want— okay, sorry! Shirt on! Shirt on!”

You settled down the easel that you just threatened to launch at him near the window where the afternoon sunlight was leaking through. A few days prior, you had contacted Ten Lee regarding the online exhibit, asking when the deadline was because you wanted to include one more piece in your portfolio.

“Nana, can you sit over here?”

There was a stool situated a few feet in front of the easel and right beside the window. He did as you said, now fully dressed and sitting properly and well behaved. You marched up to him, moving around his limbs into a specific pose. Jaemin wore a subtle smile as you grabbed his arms to a certain position, his shoulders into a certain angle, and when your fingers landed on his jaw to adjust his head, he just couldn’t help but throw all your work out the window by pulling you towards him by the waist.

“What are you—” a kiss fell on your nose. Jaemin shot you a cheeky smile.

“Sorry,” he said. “I couldn’t help it.”

You weren’t inclined to do anything else but forgive him, even if it meant refixing him into position, but somehow you managed. Running back behind the easel, you wore a satisfied smile upon seeing the composition, flicking your wrist to start the initial sketch. There was music running in the background. Jaemin sat still for thirty whole minutes.

“Can I move for a sec?”

“Yeah, yeah,” you answered. “I got the basic shapes down anyway.”

He let out an amazed gasp, lips forming into an ‘o’ shape. “So cool,” he said, and you let out a little laugh.

You were trying to focus, but in between a few strokes of your pencil, he wiggled his eyebrows when you looked at him again. You threw your head down to suppress a barrage of giggles. “Okay, this is— this is going nowhere. Can I just take a picture of you?”

Even taking a shot of him was difficult because he just wouldn’t sit still. He’d always do something to make you laugh or smile just when you were about to take a picture. You scolded him, telling him that all you needed was a few takes then the both of you can make a run for some popsicles at the nearby store. He straightened upon hearing, and you finally got to do the job.

“Do you have a title in mind for the piece?” he asked, just as you finished taking the last photo of his face up close.

You did have one. In fact, you’ve had it in mind for a while now.

“Yeah,” you answered, smiling. “Mahiwaga.”

Haechan, for whatever suspicious reason, volunteered to treat you out to lunch today at a family restaurant near the uni. You did not know why, and he would not tell you why, but you could not pass up free food. You texted Soorim to follow just in case you needed mental support because as you sat across him, looking up from your phone while munching your fries to catch the terrifying stare he was giving you, you could tell that you needed at least one other person around.

[you: dude, i think hes actually planning on killing me please hurry up]

[soorim: omw babe]

[soorim: but ur paying for me right]

You sighed, telling her yes you already ordered her food, and she replied with an annoying heart that you refused to mark read. Just as you were about to shut off your phone, ready to hear whatever Haechan was brewing, another message was sent your way.

[<nana3: baby, i saw the exhibition!! 🤩 you know, you’re so amazing, you know?!?! nana is super super proud of you 🥺💚 and i’m sure your parents are, too!! i sent the link to all of my friends yesterday hehe. also i’ll call you immediately after my class, ok?? don’t forget to drink lots of water today 😚 byebye! 💚]

“Are you two fucking yet?”

Haechan’s question caused you to choke on your fries, dropping your phone to the table so you can reach for the glass of Sprite. You looked at him, appalled. “I’m sorry?”

“What are we talking about?”

Soorim had belatedly joined in the party, pushing you farther into the seat to make room for herself. Her eyes zeroed in on the table, choosing the giant burger to attack first. You scrunched your nose as you looked at her.

“We—”

“Whether Y/N and Jaemin have done the dirty yet,” Haechan interrupted. You looked at him in offense and horror. He reciprocated with a deadpan stare. “You have, haven’t you? I went to Jaemin’s house at four in the morning yesterday and—”

“Why were you at his house at four?!”

“Doesn’t matter.”

You looked at him in disbelief, scoffing, and you looked over to Soorim with the words ‘can you believe this guy?’ ready to fire from your tongue. You could not say it. Not when Soorim looked absolutely compelled by Haechan’s bullshit allegations. She even stopped scarfing down her food. You made a mistake in calling her up here.

“What matters is that he looked absolutely fucked out absolutely naked, but not only that!” a scrunchie. He pulled out a scrunchie from his backpack. That was yours. Even had your hair on it. “This is yours isn’t it? I’ve caught you red handed, Y/N, now answer me—”

Haechan’s eyes were out to kill.

“You wrapped it, right? I’m too young to be called Uncle Hyuck so please tell me you did.”

“We are not—”

“That explains why you were walking all weird yesterday!” Soorim exclaimed. “Y/N, you know you could tell me these things, right? There is no—”

“We are not fucking!”

This wasn’t the best conversation to have at a family restaurant.

A waiter stopped serving the table next to you, it’s occupants (that included three kids and their parents) froze and looked at you in horror. An innocent passerby spilled his drink on his tray. You sharply inhaled, bowing your head apologetically. Thank god there weren’t any managers here— the three of you might have actually gotten kicked out.

With a cough, you collected yourself, giving both of your companions the stink eye for putting you in such a compromising position. “Can I not sleep at my boyfriend’s place without— without doing anything of that sort?” you huffed, ignoring the red hot heat creeping up your neck. “And as a matter of fact, I was walking weird because I fell down the while lugging plywood up the stairs, so shut the fuck up.”

The two of them let out a shriek at the same time.

“Boyfriend?! And what— you fell off the fucking stairs?!”

“Did you do as I told you?! Did you follow Hyuck’s five step guide on How To Trap Your—”

“Quiet!”

You shushed the both of them before the three of you actually got kicked out.

“Yes, boyfriend. Yes, I fell off the stairs. No, I did not follow Hyuck’s guide to whatever,” you spitefully took a sip from your drink. “You never even told me what the hell that was.”

As Haechan started to further explain his guide with Soorim enthusiastically taking everything in, you were caught by the buzzing of your phone. The screen lit up. Someone sent you an e-mail— the sender you did not recognize at all. You wiped your fingers with some tissues on the table before taking the device, clicking on the notification immediately after.

“Right. After you tell him that you’re— hey! Y/N, are you even listening?”

You shot up. Haechan noticed the distraught look in your eyes. His brows furrowed together.

“What’s wrong?”

The following weekend, you went out and treated Jaemin to dinner at a fancy Chinese restaurant despite his many complaints. He was about to pay for everything again, but this time you were faster in stealing the check. Afterward, you stopped by a nearby hardware store to buy another two pieces of plywood. You’ve been painting a lot more frequently lately, and you’ve been experimenting more on larger scale works. It was fortunate that Jaemin was there to help you bring the large sheets of wood this time.

“There we go.”

Jaemin settled the wood resting upright against your living room wall, right beside a few stained cans of paint underneath layers of newspaper. You thanked him, smiling, and he ruffled the hair on your head.

“You should ask me whenever you need to do some heavy work alright? We don’t want a rerun of last time,” you cringed upon recalling. That wasn’t a pretty fall. “How are your legs? Have the bruises healed?”

“Almost. You don’t have to worry,” you assured him. He sighed in relief.

Dinner and a shopping trip weren’t the only reasons you called him out tonight. You had actually been meaning to tell him something within the past three days. Your parents knew, Haechan and Soorim found out during lunch last time, Renjun and Jeno might have already found out thanks to their loudmouthed friend. All that’s left was Jaemin. It was his reaction that would help you make the decision.

But why was it so difficult to start talking?

“I’m gonna head out now,” he hummed, pulling you into his chest. You bit down your lip, contemplating, and maybe he noticed your unease and hesitation, as if he could hear your unsaid thoughts, because he lightly pulled away to look at your face and spoke. “What is it? Do you wanna tell me something?”

Of course, you thought to yourself. He’d probably know you’re hungry before your stomach could even rumble.

You gently pried away his hands from your arms, a hollow smile directed to him. Concern flashed through his eyes, but he held back his tongue, waiting for you to say your mind instead.

“Yeah…” you started. “I— I do have something to tell you.”

That was what you said, but as the clock ticked a couple dozen times in the background, you still had yet to tell him. It wasn’t easy to tell him. Because you were afraid that the moment you opened your mouth to squeeze out a single word, you might not make it to finish the entire sentence. If it were him, this might have been easy. But you were not, so it took a little more effort on your part to let the words go.

Maybe you shouldn’t have looked him in the eye, because the moment you did, your eyes stung from the threat of tears and so you jerked your head to the side.

But you weren’t able to evade, because Jaemin decided to follow you. You turned away again, looking towards the unplugged television, but it was once again replaced by Jaemin’s dark brown eyes. Your eyes stung, your lips pressed together, and at that moment you couldn’t help but laugh at his ridiculous actions throwing your head down in the midst of it, but your laughter got choked up by the sudden streaming of tears that you had come unprompted.

Jaemin panicked.

“Hey, hey, baby, what’s wrong? What is it?” he ducked down to reach your face, cupping your cheeks with his large hands as you wiped away your tears. “It’s okay, you can tell me, baby. I’ll listen to everything, okay?”

It took you a while to regain your voice, but Jaemin patiently waited with words of consolation. You couldn’t understand how one person could have this much goodwill and kindness in them.

Eventually your sniffling died down, and so you finally willed yourself to speak. “I— I joined Ten’s exhibition, right? And— and there was a possibility that other artists or institutions might be interested in the participants, right?”

“Mhm,” he replied, stroking the back of your head as you tightly gripped the front of his shirt. “Go on.”

“I— I got scouted? You know PIOA? In Paris? They— they offered me a full scholarship if I…” you paused for a moment, biting the inside of your mouth. “If I transfer there for the remaining months until my last year.”

Jaemin took a while to absorb it, silence flooding along with your occasional sniffles.

“Isn’t that a good thing? Ah, ah, baby look at me, look at me,” he grabbed your shoulders, frowning when he made contact with your red stained eyes. He brushed your cheek with his thumb, heart heavy from seeing you like this. It pained him to see you this way. “Why are you crying? Don’t you want to go?”

A beat of silence. You swallowed, speaking in a small, shaky voice.

“Do you want me to go?”

Another beat of silence.

“Of course! Can you imagine that out of all the people that joined that exhibit, they chose you! Your talent and hard work shouldn’t go to waste,” Jaemin inhaled sharply in between his speech, managing a smile for you to see. “I’m really proud of you, Y/N. An opportunity like this doesn’t come that easily.”

“Jaemin.”

You softly sounded, letting your head fall into his chest. He held you close, as if you were leaving at that instant.

“You know I was so happy when we got in touch again, when I came back to Korea. I know I don’t have a lot going on for me, but I could easily forget all of that because I’m with you,” once more, you felt the tears start to rise up again, but you tried your hardest to swallow them down. “It hasn’t even been that long since we got reunited and now you’re… you’re just telling me to leave you again miles, miles away as if it’s nothing.”

“It’s not like that, Y/N. It’s hard for me too, you know,” he muttered into your hair with a slight whine, his chin resting over your head. “But it’s not like we’re never going to see each other again, right? We managed for seven years, what’s two or three more?”

When he heard you stifle a laugh, laughing despite your sniveling, he couldn’t help but laugh along too. Once more and perhaps the last that night, he pulled away so he could look at the smile on your face, eyes still red and watery, and he pressed a warm kiss on your forehead.

“You have nothing to worry about, baby. We can visit each other during breaks and—” he breathed out, lips curling into a smile. “I’ll call you every day.”

Right, you wiped away your remaining tears, huffing out a brief, airy chuckle.

You looked at him, hopeful, earnest.

“Every day?”

You asked.

“Every day.”

He answered.

You were never going to get used to airports. They always carried a bitter, cold air that signified a goodbye that you were far too familiar with. Today was no different.

“Don’t forget to drink your vitamins alright? It’s a new environment so you might need some time to get used to it. Oh! And—”

“Dude, you’re worse than her actual mom.”

Jaemin shot a smile to your mother at the mention, who was waiting for your group to finish from a distance with your father. Your mother was to stay with you in Paris for a week until you got everything settled down while the four boys, Soorim, and your father decided to send you off today. Though, unlike your usual experiences with leaving and returning, today was much louder, more rowdy. It was a nice change— you only wished that it would last longer.

“It’s okay, I appreciate the concern,” you laughed. “Do I have to report back to you everything before I go to bed?”

“Well, if you can,” Jaemin mused, locking his pinky finger with yours and swinging your hand into the air from side to side. “Kidding, kidding. I trust you’ll take care of yourself there.”

A chorus of gagging noises broke out when you pulled his shirt, burying your face into his chest, prompting him to smile and wrap his arms around you. You drowned them out, though, only focusing on how warm he was despite the cold brushing of the wind, how he held you with so much gentleness that one would think he was afraid that he might break you.

It was funny how free you felt when you were trapped inside his embrace.

“How many times do I have to say goodbye to you at the fucking airport?” you grumbled, tears welling up again and so you wiped them away with your sweater sleeve. “Wait, why aren’t you crying. Aren’t you even at the very least sad that I’m gonna leave?”

Jaemin chuckled, replacing your hand with his to brush away the stray tears.

“If I cry in front of you then you probably won’t even board the plane.”

You hated that he was right.

“I’ll do it after you leave,” he let out a laugh, tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. At that moment, the pre-boarding announcement rang throughout the area's speakers, signalling that it was time for you and your mother to go. Grabbing your suitcase, you sent a grateful look to each one of them— your father, Jeno, Renjun, Donghyuck, Soorim, and—

Jaemin suddenly grabbed your suitcase handle before you could go, his hand right beside yours. You locked eyes with him, wide and surprised.

He landed a kiss right on your lips.

“Call me when you arrive, okay?”

You mindlessly nodded, still in the midst of recovering from shock. Your mother called out to you to start moving.

As you walked away, head still locked behind, you watched as the four screamed, cheered, and teased your boyfriend as they shook and pushed him around like a ragdoll, while he just kept on looking at you with a smile.

“Don’t worry, Y/N! I’ll record his crying face!”

Haechan screamed despite being several feet away already, and you stifled out a laugh.

You might have to say goodbye today, but time will come when you would meet again.

Across the cobblestone tiled sidewalk, people were walking about, the streets were filled with tourists and natives, the mid noon sun was just in reach. Summers had always been crowded in the city, and you were swimming in the middle of the crowd in a far too inappropriate attire, sweating as you spoke into the phone.

“Oh, yeah. I’m on my way to the gallery now— I had to stop by at a cafe first, though.”

“You seem busy.”

Jaemin’s voice echoed from your phone’s speakers. The streetlight turned red. You followed the crowd as you crossed the street.

“Yeah… It’s a lot of back and forth work, even on the last day of the show, but it’s all worth it,”you replied. “Did you know that people kept on asking me who my muse was for Mahiwaga? Ever the popular boy, even when you’re not here.”

It has been a year and a half since you first got to France. Things have been going well on your part with your budding art career— and so far you’ve guested in three exhibitions, but you have yet to have one solo. Even though you and Jaemin promised to see each other during breaks, it was practically impossible to align your time. He was busy with internships and his organizations this year and so were you. But one thing the both of you have faithfully maintained throughout the course of your time away was calling each other every day, even if it was just for a few minutes.

A cyclist sped past you. Jaemin’s voice was heard again. He laughed at your last remark, saying that he wasn’t that popular, but all of a sudden his voice turned into a more serious tone.

“Since you have a lot of work these days…”

Your brows furrowed, squinting as the light shone into your eyes. You clutched your sling bag, heels clattering as you passed by the cream, brown, and grey buildings.

“Should we call less often?”

You stopped in your tracks.

What?

“No— no, Jaems, what are you saying? Are you sick? Are you not feeling well?” you were almost late for the opening, but you couldn’t care less at the moment. What was he on about? Call less? Never had that crossed your mind even once. “I don’t even get to see you anymore, so if anything… we should call as often as we can.”

A few people passed from behind. His end of the line was silent. Your lips scrunched into a frown, confused.

“Jaemin?”

“That’s a relief.”

Before you could even ask him anything, the call ended.

“What the hell?” you huffed, staring at your phone screen in perplexity before you returned it to your pocket. Maybe he was feeling a lot more lonely than usual— that was unavoidable, but the both of you made it work. You should ask him what that was all about later. Now, you really needed to head to the gallery. With a sigh, you marched forward, stopping at an intersection where the large, eggshell white walls of the gallery stood across.

You stopped before the crosswalk, the lights green, and a few vehicles passed by, and your thoughts were once again clouded by Na Jaemin and why did he suddenly propose that. Was he getting sick of you? Was this his way of hinting a breakup? Your face contorted into a look of horror. No, you shook your head at the notion. He literally sent you a picture of a weird keychain last night  saying it reminded him of you. Another sigh. The light went red. You crossed the street.

Maybe it was because you were thinking too much of him, maybe you were missing him too much, but the moment you reached the middle of the crosswalk, your heart suddenly stopped, legs froze, eyes stuck to the sight right in front of you.

There he stood, right before the front stairs of the gallery with dozens of people disappearing and passing by. He spotted you, eyes lighting up, the corners of lips automatically quirking upwards. He sent you a small wave.

You ran.

“Hi— woah!”

Maybe you were causing a scene, but you didn’t care. You couldn’t find it in you to care when Na Jaemin was right fucking here. He chuckled when you suddenly ran into him, wrapping you in a tight hug that matched your own. “You know, I was afraid that you’d actually agree to limiting our calls,” he started, and you looked up, the light shining into your eyes. Jaemin’s smile was as bright as the sun. “I thought I would have to deport myself back to Korea.”

Your lips quivered, unable to hold it back. Yeah, you shook your head, a shaky laugh leaving your lips. It’s always been like this.

“Is this where you’re holding the exhibit? Wow, it’s a lot bigger than in pictures.”

There are points in your life where you’re met with a choice— to stay or leave, to smile or cry. Always him between something else. Twice. You’ve said goodbye to him twice choosing to leave. For a moment, it might seem that you’ve chosen the other. But that was never the case, because at the end of each day it was him you were thinking of, it was him that your lines end, it would always be—

“Y/N? Y/N? Are you crying?” he exclaimed, frowning as he wiped away your tears. “Ah, it’s such a happy day today, you shouldn’t be crying.”

“I missed you, you dummy.”

—Him. You’d always choose him. Na Jaemin. Jaems. Nana. Your childhood best friend. Your boyfriend—

He smiled at you, eyes shining, pressing a kiss on your forehead before taking you into his arms once more with a shaky breath. “I missed you too.”

—Your mahiwaga.

hannie-dul-set, 2020.

[hopeshoodie]

Hello hopeshoodie! I’m a longtime fan/lurker, first time asker of your blog. Knowing you don’t shy away from more complex questions about LITG, I was wondering if I could ask your opinion on my work in progress thesis called, “Fusebox and the Fallacy of the Friendship Couple.” I don’t play a lot of romance games, but I have played Litg season 1-3, cause je suis un pitre.🤡 Idk if you agree, but I feel like Fusebox doesn’t truly understand the concept of the word “no.” Even though the game stresses the importance of “no” does Fusebox really practice what they preach? Like you can tell a character you’re not interested in them, but then in the next episode they come slithering back like “ok now u want to kiss me?” 🥺👉👈 Or someone out of nowhere will hint that someone has an obvious crush on MC and it seemed like she gave them the sign she’s interested in coupling up. Why does Lottie get the security of a genuine friendship couple during her Love Island journey, but the same courtesy isn’t extended to MC? I don’t mind coupling up with characters I’m not interested in for the sake of dramatics and gameplay, but it’s when they start forcing romantic overtures between said characters is when I get a bit uncomfy. It’s almost as if Fusebox is guilt tripping you for not liking certain oh-so sweet and cuddly characters, especially if you’re pursuing a female LI or one of the “not as nice” male LIs. I get that it’s a romance game, but why can’t MC have the temporary option of a friendship couple if they’re not vibing with their partner? It makes me feel like an insecure teenage girl in a Lifetime movie, y’know in a “if I don’t go down on the quarterback will he still take me to prom” kind of way? I’m not playing season 4 but from what I’ve heard it sounds like the villa is filled with nothing but f*ckbois and pushovers so poor MC’s prospects are even more limited. Anyway, are all romance games like this or is this something unique to Fusebox because of the content the game is based on?

P.S. Sorry for the length, but I did say it was like a thesis.

I 100% agree with you (other than that Lottie and Bobby absolutely were a friends with benefits couple not a platonic couple), and I feel like the core problem (not having enough/any platonic options for MC) manifests in three ways- other characters acting inappropriately, MC acting inappropriately towards other characters, and railroading players into a romantic storyline.

But first I’ll acknowledge that I know WHY it happens and that it’s kind of common in romance based games- I think a lot of fantasy/adventure/sci fi Ifs that heavily feature romance get away from it a bit, but with the games that are strictly dramas a lot of times you do HAVE to pick and romance someone. It might be more noticeable in LITG because of the mechanics of bringing in new Lis constantly, so you feel like you’re waiting for someone and have to couple someone else in the meantime.

But it obviously happens because writing IF is hard and if you gave the choice to be platonic with every LI you would triple the amount of writing needing to be done (because you have not-dating, dating, and dating platonically + the variations on those once you break up). And also no matter how meticulous your coding is, there’s always going to be a way to trick the program into thinking you’ve romanced someone you didn’t intend to or to have a character you dated early on still default to romantic dialogue. When I wrote IF it was such a challenge to balance giving platonic options, letting readers choose different paths, and structuring out logical storylines.

But it’s a pretty noticeable problem in LITG because literally every character is into MC, and it ends up coming across super inappropriate at times (see literally everything I’ve ever written about Bobby’s storyline). This is less interesting to me than the other two issues, because it seems unavoidable, but yes literally ever character is /into/ MC at the drop of the hat and the unique personalities suffer for that because they don’t all have in-character justifications for that attraction and affection for MC. Things like Bobby being up MC’s ass about being meant for each other, rejecting all the LIS when coupled only for them to be surprised or hurt when you switch, and every single relationship constantly only being contextualized as romantic, hurts the immersion.

And FB ends up railroading you into romantic relationship even when you don’t want one. Boat Party FORCES you to pick a secondary LI who you’ll get accused of cheating with, and even in the later parts of S2 your LI will default to being in love with you even if you haven’t been with them or have only been platonic. That’s frustrating from a player customization perspective.

But in my mind, the most interesting way FB misuses platonic couples/hypocritically violates romantic boundaries is in S3 and a bit of S2, by giving us non-romanceable friend characters but then allowing MC to violate that boundary. Because FB clearly wants to teach readers that no means no and not everyone will cater to their whims, in real life or in a game. But then you can cheat with Noah, who had been strictly platonic MC up to that point, or motorboat Elladine, or flirt with Seb whilst he’s naked. And these characters all ‘stay friends’ with MC after the player makes those choices. I am excited to see that S4 has Hazeem who is just blatant about not being interested in MC and can be her bro, but then they immediately send him home lol.

So yeah. I feel like FB could make this better by emulating S1 and having one or two distinct characters who are strictly platonic friends with MC (but then adding the ability to couple up with them as a strictly platonic relationship).

[bopbopstyles]

to celebrate being bi and all of the bi writers out there, @harrysclementines and i decided to run a BI-FICATHON for the month of August!

WHAT TO POST:

it should be able to function as a standalone imagine/oneshot and the MC should be bi. we aren’t creating any bi!Harry prompts because we don’t want to place a label on him that he hasn’t come out and directly claimed, but if that’s your vibe we’re not going to stop you! 

ofc and y/n fics are both welcome! write however you like we do not care!

we are wanting to spotlight bi creators specifically, but anyone is welcome to write for this, even if you are not bi! please make sure either way that you are being respectful of bi individuals in your works. 

you can use a prompt or not - we made them to help get your brains movin’ and groovin’, but if you can write anything you want as long as the MC is bi. prompts are below the cut

if you choose to use a prompt, pls message me which one you are doing so you can claim it! we also aren’t saying only one person per prompt, so if u want to use one someone has already claimed, you can still message me :) 

if you have prompt ideas, feel free to message one of us and i’ll add them!

word count minimum is 500, but go wild! no maximum!

fluff, smut, angst, drabble -- all is welcome! 

please tag your fics with #hsbificathon !!!!

WHEN TO POST: anytime in August! we will be adding all of the fics that are entered to this post, so please make sure to tag your fics with #hsbificathon or send them to us if we haven’t posted them! 

MASTERLIST:

Coming out to Harry @harryslittlewhore

Having sex w/ a male for the first time @brwnskin-bunnyteeth @fromyourstrulyh

Threesome

Going to a strip club together @harryswatermelonsegment

Flipping through magazines and talking about cute girls @wellbafineline

A girl hitting on y/n and Harry is jealous @kiss-inthekitchen

Harry teasing her for getting wet while watching a movie with a hot girl @thestyleswritings

Talking about first celebrity girl crush

Y/N hooks up with Harry’s ex or vice versa @iwannaholdyoutight-

Same ex @unn--known

Y/N is dating a girl after breaking up with Harry @bigbutterflytattoo

Hooked up with the same person @toothpastekissy

Best friend harry one where they both have eyes for a girl at a club and who can seduce her first? @thicksniall

Harry teaching her how to flirt with girls

Harry teaching her how to go down on girls @groovybaybee

High school au best friend Harry where she goes to his house and is crushing on Gemma @hecticharry

Best friend Harry where he sets her up with one of his female friends @mellowstyles94 

Harry finds Y/N looking through his Playboys (roommate!harry) @harrysclementines

Y/N brings home girls and guys (roommate!harry) @berrynarrybanana

Harry asks her about the differences in sex between guys and girls @bopbopstyles + prompt 19

He accidentally stumbles upon a livestream of her and her friend (Camgirl!Y/N) @havethetimeofyourstyles

Going to a concert where the singer is a bi femme @adoremp3

[venteamocha]

Thanks so much for the IF recs! I'd absolutely take a second post of recommendations for Twine games too if you're willing to share! <3

Of course!!

I... actually like twine games better than cog based ones, in some ways, just because they tend to be fancier and prettier, and I am secretly a ferret in the body of a human and I love shinies. ADHD, baby!

I only actually know of like 12 twine games, so if there are any that anyone who sees this knows of that I didn’t list, feel free to let me know about them! There’s a chance I do know about them and just didn’t put them here, but I would rather hear one I already know of on the off chance that I’ll get a new one dropped in.

That said! Another list of games I really like that is again in no particular order!

They’re all on itch.io by the way! They tend to work better if you download them but most can be run in your browser and most are also mobile friendly so you can play them on your phone! I’ll note which ones are.

Scout: An Apocalypse Story: I love dystopia stories, I dearly wish we had more IF based in this kind of setting. Set in a wasteland that is trying to pull itself together with people trying to find out if other settlements are out there while also trying to, well, stay alive. I gotta say, I played only E’s route for a long, long time, but once I tried the other ones I haven’t really gone back. I still love E, you can pry the childhood friend trope out of my cold dead hands, but wow. Oliver. Wow. That dude has serious UST. And Sabine!! I’ve been forced out of my little “play it the same way every time” rut and I’m not sorry. I very much like that you can choose the intimacy level, as someone who’s ace. Sometimes I like reading the smut, sometimes I don’t. Options! (mobile friendly!)

Bad Ritual: I got it baaaaaaaaaad~ I do though, I love Siruud. I have terrible, terrible taste in men. I mentioned Dracula in the other list, and here there’s an actual demon. This is a game with *sass* and I always love a chance to be sassy. I think part of the reason I resonate so much with this one is because of how jaded retail has made me tbh but that’s another story.  Honestly, if you like dark settings, I recommend you play this one first of all my recommendations. It’s just such a good game and there are so many choices and even the pronoun choices are pretty varied.  It’s just good! (mobile friendly!)

Wayfarer: Another for the fantasy list! I love the worldbuilding in this one, and the character creator is just amazing. There are maps, there’s a codex, seriously if you love reading lore, this is definitely a game for you. This is like if Tolkien made an IF. It’s amazing. I’ve said that a few times but it’s true. In all honesty it might count as one that’s not so romance focused, since it does focus more on plot. If I could just sit down and make an IF, I’d want it to be like this tbh. With a beautiful framework, a well organized space of information for the players to just look at and see stuff about the world, a way to develop and build their own character in a clear cut way, and the game immediately tells you what stats are effected by what choices. I really enjoy it when games try to work in character creation in creative ways, but sometimes I just want to sit down and go, “Okay, my character has red hair, blue eyes, is short, and has a crippling phobia of lizards” and this game lets me do that. Well, except for the lizard part. (Not as mobile friendly as the others but I make it work!)

Love and Friendship: It’s a regency game and I love Pride and Prejudice. What can I say? Something about the massive amount of rules of society just gets me. Propriety! This is a game that has a set gender protagonist, female, and it actually is a bit different from the norm in that it has two female love interests and one male, when most of the time it’s the other way around. So that’s something. You can even have a platonic route with a fourth love interest, who is also male. There really aren’t enough platonic routes, but I understand why that is, since a lot of IF players are looking for romance. (mobile friendly!)

Exiled From Court: Also a bit of the same vibe simply because of how constrained everyone is by rules. Nobility, after all. There are a lot of love interests, and one is the MC’s sister’s husband, which is definitely gonna be scandalous. Will I do it? Will I? Eventually. I do like how you can act like an absolute hellion, well, as far as that goes considering. You can try to be a better person but that’s less fun, lol. (mobile friendly!)

A Tale of Crowns: This is literally one of the very first twine games I ever played. Really! It’s got a lot of wonderful intrigue and the setting is very fun. There aren’t a ton of fantasy middle eastern games, and this game is definitely one reason why we should have more. There’s a great deal of customization, and the love interests’ gender will changed based on your MC’s gender and sexuality combination. I like R & D best, and no that’s not a pun. I think. (mobile friendly!)

For the Crown: This is a different game, I swear, they just both happen to have crown in the title, lol. You get to play as an assassin, which is a great deal of fun. The lore in the game is very nice too. I tend to play with they/them pronouns though, and there were a few pronoun hiccups in the game. Seems to be an issue across all of the games made by this author, but I know how much of a pain variables can be so hopefully those will get squashed soon. There’s an explicit content choice in this one as well, and if you turn it on there is an “equipment” choice, so this is definitely gonna be spicy later on! (mobile friendly, but after each chapter the browser shifts as it auto saves. you just have to tap restore game to keep playing.)

-These games aren’t exactly twine games, but I’m putting them here because they’re visual novels that fit the IF format for the most part and are also on itch.io and I love them and for this post at least I will bend my own rules! They all have gender choice MCs and are nonbinary friendly.-

Perfumare: This game is actually being made into an IF, with the visual novel as a sort of preview of what we’re gonna get there. I literally cannot wait for that to happen, this game is so good as it is, and from what we’ve been told it’s only gonna get better. This game has an excellent world, the characters are all messy in the best ways, and ugh it has hurt me quite a bit, again in the best way.  It’s another one on the dark side of things. The powers in this game are just so fun, I dearly want a game set in this world where we can choose what powers we have! Maybe that will be in the IF, but I have a feeling the answer is no. We’ve been teased that there will be a second game with a different MC who will get to romance the characters we can’t in this one, and that alone is enough to get me to jump as soon as it drops. The love interests aren’t gender variable but there are two male ones and one female. I, a known mess, recommend Laurent for lots of repression and pain. (not mobile friendly, you gotta play on desktop/laptop)

Andromeda Six: I’ve recommended this one to pretty much everyone I know, it is such an excellent game. The cast is a mashup of misfits and makes me miss my Mass Effect crews. I specifically set my pronouns to she/her just so they’d all call me Princess. What can I say, I like it. There’s lots of pain, lots of drama, lots of world building, lots of interesting lore, and there is much breaking of cuties. Much. Can’t wait till we get to the next planet. The author has gone out of their way to say that each love interest is gonna get their own arc and will definitely get their own share of attention, so no matter who you pick you’ll have plenty of time to be with them and watch them shine. (not mobile friendly, gotta play on desktop/laptop)

When the Night Comes: Not only do you get to play a badass hunter but it has multiple poly routes! Multiple! It’s rare when you get one poly in a game, this one has three! You can also choose to romance any of them individually if you so choose. It’s dark fantasy gothic, and I really really like that. (not mobile friendly, gotta play on desktop/laptop)

Errant Kingdom: Made from the same dev as WTNC, this one is set in a more fantasy middle eastern setting. Very pretty, lots of intrigue. You can choose between three set protagonists, who can have three different storylines depending on your choices, which is very nice for replayability. It’s got two poly routes this time, and it works the same as their other game in that you can romance them individually if you’d rather be monogamous. (not mobile friendly, gotta play on desktop/laptop)

[mywonuderful]

Not So Cold-Hearted Pt.21

Summary: Y/N, a member of a popular newly debut girl group and Wonwoo has what some may call a relationship with emotional ambivalent. Will their relationship remain cold-blooded or will they finally come to an agreement and become something more?

Pairing: Jeon Wonwoo x Reader

A/N: As always, if anyone is interested in being added into the taglist for this series, please feel free to send in a ask or message me!

masterlist

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

You quickly scurried back stage and changed into your stage outfit before you heard a knock on the door. You wore a ruffled cropped off-the shoulder top along with a skort and your hair was in loose curls with some braids to fit the vibe of the music. “Come in!” The door peeked opened as Moonbin pops his head in, smiling excitedly. “Your outfit looks so cute! I can’t wait to show everyone all our hard work.” He took a sit on one of the dressing chairs beside you as you looked at yourself, nervously smiling your reply. “You okay?” “Yeah I’m fine. Just a little nervous. It’s my first performance without members and all.” You looked and started playing with your fingers. “Everything will be perfectly! You can show your members and everyone just how amazing you are! I’m sure they’ll all eagerly waiting as well.” He tries cheering you up as your looked over to him, humming a soft ‘right.’

“Moonbin, you need to double check your mic once more, could you come out for a second?” One of the staff called him out as he left to room. You remained seated, facing the mirror as you looked at yourself, feeling your heart raise in speed when you heard the crowd scream as one of the performances finishing as yours comes near, You tried calming yourself by taking deep breaths and closing your eyes. You suddenly heard a buzzing of your phone against the table. As your phone lits up, you saw that you had a incoming message.

‘Don’t be nervous. You’ll do great.’ Your eyes widen as you read the message from Wonwoo. Just as you were about to reply he sent in one more message. ‘Good luck.’ The corners of your mouth lifted up into a smile as you let out a soft sigh. “Y/N! It’s almost time. Let’s go!” Moonbin pulled you by the arm as you shut your phone before getting up. 

---

You were currently backstage in one of the side stages that was away from the main stage as one of the groups were performing on. Staffs had their hands all over you, trying to finish up any touches and fixes as you focused your breath, trying to slow down your quick heart beat. As you glanced over your shoulder, you could tell he was quite nervous as well as he eyes kept on quivering. You found it quite cute about how he was all calm about it before and now but yet, who wouldn’t be nervous on such a big stage. You reached over to his hand and grabbed on to it as his head turned to your, in shock on your movements.

“Don’t worry, we’ll do great like you said.” you smiled and gave his hand a quick squeeze as he returned with a blushing grin. Applause and screams filled the backstage as the you saw the group leaving the stage through one of the monitors. You eyes looked through the gap of the cloth curtain which divided the backstage and steps to the side stage, seeing the faces of fans with huge smiles, and glows in their eyes as the next performance begins. “Y/N and Moonbin, you can now head on out to the stairwell. Don’t go up yet until they finish performing and the MCs come out.” You pulled out one of your ear-set to hear the staff trying to speak out the crowd. The both of you remained in silence, staring at the monitor as the group ends the performance and walked out. Moonbin give you a firm nod before he headed on out first. You placed your hand over your chest and closed your eyes for a second to claim yourself.

‘You got this.’ you thought to yourself as slowly stepped out of the curtains with some staff following behind. You stood closely behind Moonbin as the room lights up and the MCs began talking.

“OH MY GOSH IT’S MOONBIN AND Y/N.” you heard some fans screamed. You slowly lifted your head, meeting the eyes of the fans who started screaming and waving frantically. Moonbin seemed to have noticed as well as he chuckled and gave them a small wave as you followed as well. Your eyes wondered trying to find your table with your members when your eyes found Wonwoo, whos table was facing the stage you’re performing on. Your eyes then wandered to your members as you saw some of them bickering over snacks they snuck in.

“Okay, you guys can head on up now. Good luck!” Moonbin turned around and gave you a fist bump before stepping on up. Your mind went blank, not knowing if it was from the nervousness or just from all the sound but there was no going back now. As you stepped on to the stage, you saw the staff hurry back as you got into position.

“Since this year’s theme is cover songs, that’ll only mean one thing....” “Special stages!” The two MCs sang together. Your area was dark but you were still able to see Moonbin has he looked over at you before sticking his hand out for a high-five. You smiled and returned it where he then mouth ‘let’s kill this stage.’ “So, for the next performance, it’ll be a special collaboration!” “No way? With whom?” “*Insert ASTRO song* Astro’s Moonbin and....” “Newly hot debut group, Eunoia’s Y/N!” The crowd goes wild as your eyes glanced forward to see your members whipping out the phones, getting ready to record your performance and the surprised expression of Seventeen as well as many other idols. Minghao softly smiled at your name whereas Wonwoo looked down making your heart drop before some of his members nudged and teased him as you saw him let out a small smile. “Please welcome, Moonbin and Y/N!” Everyone clapped and screamed as the lights dimmed and the whole arena falls into darkness and silent. You got into your expression and position, trying to take steady breaths but the lights on your stage illuminated and the music starting playing. As you and Moonbin performed, your nervousness slowly faded and you started getting loose in yourself, feeling comfortable as if you were practicing with Moonbin. Your eyes would peek over at your members, seeing how hard their screaming and cheering along with the boys who all chanted. Minghao was looking at you with glowly eyes, watching your passionately as you gazed over at Wonwoo who couldn’t help but to smile as well. You felt yourself being lost in the performance as the fans shouted and pumped their lightsticks. Even through such difficult choreography, you were able to get through it with Moonbin as if the two of you were having fun, smiling at each other while singing and ended the performance in a strong stance. As your chest heaved up and down, your eyes were filled with fans jumping up and down, idols standing up to applaud and your ears were filled with cheers, and screams. You couldn’t help but to get lost in the moment as you looked up at Moonbin and shot him a smile before he chuckled and give you a pat on the head, driving the crowd even more crazier before the lights died down and the both of you exited the stage with heavy breaths.

“That was absolutely amazing!” Moonbin acclaimed as soon as you entered back stage. “Wow...” You were still speechless of how everything went. “Everything was like a blur.” “I’m so glad I choose you as my partner.” He complimented as you blushed before the staff ran over to wipe off the sweat. After taking a group photo, you headed back into the change room to get your phone. Turning it on, you read the new incoming message you got.

‘Who would’ve known that your smile and voice could melt my heart. You did amazing Y/N.’ you read the text message from Minghao as a huge smile grew on your face. Your refreshed your text messages a few times, hoping for something from Wonwoo.

“Y/N? You can head back on now. Everyone has been moved to the awards sitting area so you can head on there after you change back.” One of the staff popped in to inform you before you sighed, putting down your phone and got changed back into your dress. As the MCs introduced the awards, you walked up the side stairs to the seating area. You shyly bowed as you passed the idols to pay your respect as they bowed their heads. You quickly rushed over to your members before taking a seat beside them. “THAT WAS AMAZING!” “I already replayed the video like 8 times.” “You and Moonbin must’ve worked your heads off choreographing and practicing.” “That’s our Y/N!” “I bet you everyone will be fans of you in no time!” all your members spoke as you shook your head in embarrassment. “I was so nervous up there. It’s so different without you guys.” You confesses as they all spatted out more compliments. “Your members were right, that performance was definitely a sight. Everyone was hooked on it.” A male voice said as you turned around and saw Hoshi waving as the rest gave you thumbs up. Wonwoo give you a small nod as you smiled and thanked them before returning your attention to the MCs.

“Now, onto the competitive awards for the best female group!” The MC announced as you and your members started getting nervous. You were noticed that your group was nominated for multiple categories but that was the most given to your group. “This group has been known for their hardworking, passionate and synergy. With all their personalities and high-spirits, they are well off one of the most hyped female groups.” “Don’t be fooled. Even though they are considered one of the new groups, they have sure ranked up to the top, taking top charts worldwide.” your members’ eyes widen as they heard ‘new groups.’ You heart started racing again, with the chance of your group being nominated. “This years best female artist goes to.....” your members started holding hands together, tightly gripping it as they waited for the winner to be called. “...Congratulations to Eunoia for being this year’s Best Female Group!” The MCs joyed as your eyes shot open, meeting the surprised and shocked expression of your members as well. Your members all stood up, shakily as they were still shocked as you were as well. You walked past the idols who applaud and the crowd screams in a pitches as you and your member headed up to the main stage. “Congratulations! But before I hand this over to you I have something else to add.” The MC holds back the metal as you and your group stood in confusion as well as everyone. “I would also like to announce Eunoia as the winners of this years Best Dance Performance and World Performer!” A hand few to your mouth as the staff brought out 2 more awards and the audience goes wild one again. Your members looked at each other with eyes that were about to pop out of their sockets. Remi handed you one of the awards to hold as you stepped forward to speak. “Thank you for your speech. Would you like to say anything for your international fans?” One of the MCs asked as all your members turned their heads to you. You were taken back since you had nothing prepared, thinking that you wouldn’t need to speak nor win any awards. Slowly stepping up to the mic, your mind goes blank.

“Um... I’d like to speak on behalf of Eunoia that we are so thankful for being able to stand on this stage and winning three awards. We wouldn’venever thought to come this far without the help of every one of you. Thank you all from supporting us and staying by our side. We will promise to continue working hard and harder in the future! Let’s all make some memorable memories together.” You spoke in English as fans started screaming at your words. You bowed and backed up as the MCs thanked you before you headed down back to your seat. The rest of the awards flew by, as the final awards were being announced before the performances resumes.

“This year’s artist awards goes to... SEVENTEEN!” You stood up and cheered without a second thought before your members all chuckled and followed along. You turned around as they all looked quite startled before walking up. “We you like to thank.....” Seungcheol started giving his speech as you admired them from afar, smiling widely with your hands clasped together as you looks at each of their faces. Your eyes shifted to Wonwoo who was nodding as his scanned the audience before landing on yours, meeting your sight. Your smile grew as you gave him a small thumbs up as he lets out a small chuckle, making Dino glancing back at him before he covers his mouth.  “Thank you everyone for voting and all the nominates. Once again, congratulations to all the winners for tonight’s ceremony. Now, shall we get back to the performances?” The MCs introduced the upcoming performances as you heard shuffling in the back, making you turn around to see the boys getting up and heading off to the side. “Good luck!” You whispered loudly as Minghao turned and to give you a grin, making your feel a tingle in your heart. You tried asking Minghao multiple times what song they were covering but every time you tried to bring up the question, he would either walk away or say something off topic which you found yourself falling for. Your mind started to wandering what songs you would see them covering, when suddenly you saw hands waving in the corner of your eyes. Shifting your head to the direction, you saw a small group of fans holding massive cameras, trying to get your attention as you let out a chuckle, and smiled with a small wave as they shrieked in excitement. Idols were performing one after another, from different platforms of stages with beams of lights, bursts of fire and confetti. Your head started aching, probably from all the loud pounding of music and movement of light, making you more dizzy as you rested your head on your hand. “Y/N? Are you alright? Do you feel sick?” Nari, who was sitting beside you notices and asked with her voice full of worry. “I’m probably not used to all the loud music and lights.” You confessed as your rested her hand on your back, trying to sooth you. Luckily, the pain didn’t seem to increase and that it was only a little bothersome. As the next group got on, you saw multiple shadows scurrying onto the main stage. “Isn’t that Seventeen?” you leaned over to mumble to your members as they narrowed their eyes, trying to see the figures through the dark. “Hmm.. I can’t tell, there’s too many of them.” Mira replied “Too many of them is Seventeen.” Na On rolled her eyes with a smile. The music as your members turned to look at each other with your jaws dropped. “This is our song?!” Skype screamed as all your members started cheering. The lights filled the stage as the boys started dancing and singing to one of your hits since debut. As your part came up, Wonwoo pops up and sang while cheerfully smiling making you fall for his smile. You shook your head, trying to get rid of the weird thoughts as your eyes sparkled while watching the rest of their performance. You and your members were holding handing, singing along as everyone was immersed in their cover of your song. They ended their performance with the screeching and the hectic pumping of carat bongs as they bowed and left the stage to head on back to their seats. As they walked on back, you hovered over the edge of the platform, asking the staff to bring some water. You and and your members quickly brought up the bottles of waters and opened it for them as the walked past to take a seat. “That performance was amazing!” You twisted open the bottle as you handed it to Minghao with a grin. They were clearly all still out of breath but Minghao still lets out his ever-so soft smile at you. You turned our head behind to see Wonwoo resting his elbow on his knees, his palms pressed up against his forehead as he caught his breath. You popped open the cap of the bottle, and nervously brought it towards him. “H-Here. Great job on the performance by the way, it was exceptional.” His head raised to glance at the bottle before chugging the whole thing. “Thanks.” His voice was still breathless. You nodded before turning back to the stage to watching the next couple of performances

“Eunoia, please follow me to get ready for your performance.” A staff comes up to with a clipboard and a in-ear mic. Your members nodded and all started standing up to leave to backstage to change into their stage outfits. “Good luck Y/N~ I can’t wait to see your performance!” Mingyu fisted the air as you chuckled as you left. As you walked backstage there was something important that lingered in your mind but you just couldn’t get a hold of it.

‘Was it during rehearsal again...?’ you thought to yourself as you entered your group’s dressing room as all the staff was running back and forth with outfits and makeup in the hands.

The problem on the side of the stage.

<<prev // next>>

[atinydise]

Ateez reacting to their s/o doing a sexy collaboration with another member (2/2)

❦ Genre: Fluff.

❦ Pairing: OT8.

❦ Word count: 2k8.

❦ Requested: Yes, thank you! 🦋

❦ Masterlist.

Part 1

SAN ft. Yunho

ATEEZ were participating at a survival. In each group, there will be a winner who would need to perform with a female group at the last stage. San was so happy when he knew that your group was chosen as a finalist. You were the main dancer of the group, so you were the one who would need to perform with an ATEEZ member. You wanted to dance with your boyfriend, San but Yunho was the winner. The jury liked the way he performed, he was so powerful, and it fits you well. San was disappointed but he knew that you were his girlfriend no matter what. You would be with Yunho for a week and after that you would be with San H24/7. Even if he was trying to comfort himself as he could, something was bothering him. 

The first day of your practice, San almost fainted when the choreographer showed the dance. He enjoyed the fact that Yunho was tall, he could give another vibe to the choreography. San felt like the tiniest man in the world. He always envied Yunho’s height. He wanted to feel a little bit more manly. But when he met you, he forgot about his complex and worked on his self-esteem with you. He loved the way you were struggling and growing up together. But right now, you were body rolling against Yunho. You were in front of him, hand on the back of his neck while he was holding your waist carefully. San coughed, you glanced at him but focused back on the next move. You were a bit embarrassed to dance this way with his friend, but it was your job and it was a good way to show the world how talented you are. Few minutes later, San asked out of nowhere. “Can I dance with her?” Yunho raised a brow and you almost chocked with your saliva. “What you mean?” “You are knowing the choreography pretty well know. I think she can dance with me.” You pinched his arm, “you can’t dance with me San. He’s my partner.” “And I’m your boyfriend so I think I have more rights to dance with you than him,” he said rubbing his arm. “Stop being jealous San. We are working only.” He rolled his eyes, “and I want to help you too.” Yunho was looking at the scene in front of him, ignoring what he could say to help. It was the first time San was insisting so much to dance with you. “What is the problem San?” He finally asked. “The choreography is the problem. The proximity is the problem. She’s my girlfriend, it’s a problem. You are my bro, it’s a problem. And your height too! Why do you need to be so tall?” He complained. “You are going crazy San,” you sighed, embarrassed by your boyfriend’s behavior. “I’m crazy because I don’t like the way you are dancing with him?” He asked you seriously. His tone changed and surprised you. He added, “I made my best to not saying anything till you started this but it’s too much now.” You bit your lip. You ignored how hard it was for him to see you dancing with Yunho. He knew both of you really well. He should know that nothing would happen, it would stay professional no matter what. “I don’t like the way you dance against him. I don’t like the way he touches you. When you are touching him; I got chills and I want to throw up. I know this is just for the show, but I can’t help to feel jealous.” He confessed. Yunho looked at you, being sorry. “You know sometimes you are jealous when I’m a MC with another idol or I’m participating at a show. It’s exactly the same thing.” It was the good example to show how he really felt. You were jealous nonstop, even if he was working. “I’m sorry, I hadn’t realized how much it bothers you San-ie.” You apologized. “It’s okay. I know I overreacted. I should let you practice in peace.” He smiled, embarrassed. “You can dance with her for an hour if you want,” offered Yunho. San’s smile went wide, “really?” “Yes, but for an hour only. We will need to practice back after.” San nodded and played the music. He grabbed your hands and memorized few of the moves. “You are not that bad,” you admitted. “It’s because I was imaging how I would dance this with you.” He smirked. You giggled, “you always get what you want.” “That’s exactly what Wooyoung said when we started to date.”

MINGI ft. Hongjoong

For the MMA 2020, the director asked all of the groups participating to do a special stage, but only with the leaders of each group. You were selected as it was your position. It would be a medley of the decade. There will be 6 teams composed by 2 people: a girl and a boy. Each team would need to perform 30 seconds of 3 songs that influenced the decade. Randomly, you were paired with Hongjoong. It helped you to relax because you know him, since you are dating his teammate, Mingi. But your boyfriend didn’t agree. He was nonstop complaining about how unfair it was. He would love to perform at a medley like that and with you too. He even sent anonymously a letter at the director for him to change the rules and the team. But he got ignored. He was fuming every time you went at their dorm but to see Hongjoong. He invited you to choose the songs and to practice the vocal and the dance. Mingi was sitting on the couch, not missing a little bit of the conversation. “Is there a song that you loved this decade Y/N?” Asked the leader. “I’m more into the new generation but I think ‘Call Me Baby’ of EXO. I really liked this one.” He nodded, “yes I agree with this one.” “And you? Is there on that you like?” “Hum... I like BTS songs. I think with their popularity, we can show how much they improved this decade.” He offered. “Good choice, what about ‘Run’? It was a good one.” “Nice one Y/N!” You giggled. Mingi growled, not liking how you became closer. “So… We need a last song... and what about a girl one?” You asked. “I think I have a good idea. What about Troublemaker by Hyuna and Hyeunsung?” Mingi chocked with his saliva, but none of you paid attention to him. “Hum are you sure about this one?” You asked, ignoring if it was iconic or not. “Yes, I saw people on social media still talking about it. This was unbelievable.” He laughed. You nodded, “then okay, we have 2 boys’ group and a duet.” “Are you really going to dance and sign Troublemaker?” Asked Mingi, standing up. “Yes why?” Replied Hongjoong. “You can’t dance that with my girlfriend! It’s so sexy!” He shouted. “Mingi! Stop being so jealous! It’s for the show.” “I don’t care if it’s for the show Y/N,” he crossed his arms on his chest, “I won’t let my girlfriend grinding on my leader on stage.” You blushed, imagining the scene. “He won’t grind on each other Mingi.” “It’s sexy.” He made a point. “Come on baby, it’s just 30 seconds.” You sat on his lap. “But-“ “Please baby, just a little effort. We need to do our best for this stage.” You made your puppy eyes. Mingi sighed, his bead resting on your shoulder, “then okay... but not more than 30 seconds!” “Promise!” You kissed his nose. “I didn’t know you were so jealous Mingi.” Teased Hongjoong. “How I can’t be jealous? Did you see Y/N? She’s stunning! Everyone wants to take her away from me.” You blushed, “stop saying nonsense Mingi.” “It’s the truth. If I could I would hide you in a secret place and keep you away from everyone.” You smiled, happy to know how proud he was to have a girlfriend like you. “It’s creepy,” said Hongjoong. “I don’t care. She’s mine.” He replied, putting his long arms around your stomach. Even if he didn’t say it, your boyfriend was so proud. You were achieving your dream step by step. Everyone would see how talented you are. Even if it means that he will need to share you with his teammates or friends for future stages. He promised that he would keep you for himself every time he can.

WOOYOUNG ft. Seonghwa

Your boyfriend Wooyoung loves to get all the attention on him. When he’s with his fans, he’s always trying to get their attention by dancing or telling jokes. And for you as a girlfriend it was the same thing. If he hadn’t your attention, then he would try his best to get it. That’s why you were apprehending to say that you would need to dance with Seonghwa for a special performance on the show “Hit the Stage”. The theme was the Valentine Day. Seonghwa proposed to start slowly with a romantic theme but to change for a sexier one at the end. You accepted but your boyfriend was still ignoring about it. To avoid any scene in front of your dance partner, you practiced 2 days secretly. To know which direction, you will take. But finally, it was the day to announce it to Wooyoung. You bought one of his favorite snacks and headed to the dorm. He was so happy to see you that you waited a bit before telling him. But when they went to sleep, leaving your boyfriend and you alone in the living-room, you decided that it was the right moment. “Wooyoung...” you said shyly. “Yes babe?” He asked, still focused on the movie. “I need to tell you something.” You sat down comfortably, grabbing a pillow to give you enough strength. “What’s happening Y/N?” “Promise me that you won’t be mad okay?” “I can’t promise if I don’t know. Maybe you cheated on me,” he said nervously. “No... it’s not that important.” You said. “Just tell me Y/N,” he sais seriously. You took a deep breath and said, “I will perform with Seonghwa for the show “Hit the Stage” and we will dance a sexy version of ‘Wave’.” Wooyoung stayed silent. Not realizing if it was a joke or not. “We didn’t choose each other as a partner, they just assigned us like that.” “Since when you know?” You coughed, “1 week.” “And you are telling me only now?” “Yes, because I know that you would be mad!” “But I’m not. It’s a good thing for both of you.” He smiled. You were really confused. Usually he would be so mad and angry because someone would get your attention. “Really? Wow. Then thank you,” you raised a brow, still not believing it. “Can I assist at your practices? I would like to see you perform!” He asked enthusiastically. “Yes sure... we are practicing tomorrow afternoon. So if you are free y-“ “Okay I will come tomorrow.” He smiled, focusing back on his movie. You don’t know what and why, but he prepared something. The next day, you practiced individually at the morning and Seonghwa joined you after the lunch. One hour later, you saw Wooyoung sitting on the couch, near the stereo. He didn’t say anything, he just let you finish your choreography. Watching carefully every move you made. He noticed that he was sexier than he thought. Unconsciously, he started to rip the paper of the prospectus he got before entering in the building. As he was seeing you moving, he threw some of the paper on you, breaking the eyes contact you had with his teammate. “What are you doing Woo?” You asked, pointing at the paper bullet on the floor. “I just make sure that you know that I’m still here.” You stopped the music, “I know that you are here!” “Then focus back.” He simply said. You rolled your eyes; he was trying to get your attention every time you focused back on Seonghwa. Making impossible to practice properly. So, you just walked toward him and whispered something at his ear. Seonghwa saw the blush on his member cheek. Without saying anything, Wooyoung left the practice room. “Where he’s going?” “At the dorm,” you smiled. “How you made him leave?” You blinked, “it’s a secret.” Seonghwa stared at you, curious. “Should we continue?” You smiled, playing the music.

JONGHO ft. San

You were dating for a year now. It first started when you asked his number backstage, before he went performing. You had a crush on him for so long, you couldn’t miss the opportunity. Finally, you did, and it was the best idea you had in a while. At the beginning, you just went on a calm and peaceful date like a walk at the Han River or at the park. At these dates you learned a lot on each other. He trained a lot to not be a burden for the group. He’s was trying his best no matter what. But he likes that his Hyungs take care of him well. He remembered that you liked boy who were mature, who could take their own decisions. He ignored if you saw him this way, that’s why he was working on his maturity too. But it became harder when he knew that you would dance a sexy performance with San for an award show. He thought that maybe you will realize that his Hyung is more mature than him and fell for him. San was what we could call a handsome boy. His feature and his body proportions were perfect. When he was on stage, he was another person. He was powerful and extra. While Jongho was still a bit shy and wasn’t shining like his Hyung, or at least that’s what he thought. This is why, he tried to dissuade you to perform at this show. “Are you sure you want to?” He asked for the 3rd time. “Yes, it would be a good thing for my career Jongho.” You replied. “But what about wait a better opportunity?” “What is the problem Jongho? I feel like you are not happy for me. It’s like you are trying to stop me.” “N-no or maybe not really?” “Not really?” You repeated curious. “I-“ “I thought that you would be happy for me,” you said visibly disappointed. Jongho bit his lip, he felt bad to not supporting you when you had the first event in your life who could lift your career up. “It’s not that I’m not happy for you Y/N...” “Then what?” He tried to explain his issue, but San called you in the hallway. You bowed politely to him. “We should practice now! We don’t have much time before the show.” He smiled. You nodded, “yes you are right.” “We need to show the sexiest version of us for this stage.” He laughed. You would need to perform a sexy and elegant dance. This is another reason of why Jongho didn’t want you to go on stage with San. He would feel like a kid next to you, after that. “I will find a practice room, okay?” He said. “Sure! Text me the number.” You replied. San walked past to his member, “you are paler than usual Jongho, are you okay?” He asked. “Yes, I’m fine. But I would love to talk with Y/N in private...” he insinuated. “Sure, see you later!” San left you there, looking for an empty room where you could practice in peace. “What do you want to say?” You asked him a bit mad at him. “I’m happy that people start to see how talented you are. It’s just that I’m scared that you might be interested by San Hyung more than me after that.” He confessed. “What are you talking about? I won’t leave you for San. I know that he’s cute, but I love you.” “Then even if you dance really sexily with him you won’t fall in love?” You giggled, “no.” “You are this much jealous of San?” You smirked. “Who would appreciate that his girlfriend dance with someone else?” “1 point for you,” you admitted. “And you are always telling me that you like mature boy. Maybe you will notice that San is the type of guy that you want.” “If I could beat your ass right now I would.” “Why?” “You are the so mature, probably the one I ever met Jongho. You are the maknae and the main vocal of your group. You could be pressured easily, but you are still trying to do your best. I never saw you giving up on something.” He smiled, reassured to see the way you see him. “You are totally my type. And I love you for that.” You smiled. He pulled you closer to him on a tight hug. “Thank you.” You rubbed his back, “anytime baby.” When you thought that it would be okay, he asked, “but do you still need to perform a sexy dance with my Hyung?” You grunted, “Yes. But you are ruining the moment right now.” He smiled, “sorry.”

Part 1

[offtopicoverload]

Howdy there!! Who are the li’s you fancy the most from LITG??

hi! thanks for the ask!

i honestly dunno who’s my top answer, cuz they’re all interesting in their own way

I’m only going to talk about female LIs cuz the only male routes I’ve finished are Bobby and Jake, and I tapped through most of Jake and only ended with Bobby on my first run cuz I never unlocked Marisol, so I’m not the best source lol

Talia:

She’s just so chill but has no problem standing up for MC, she has her back no matter what

Which, like, what a queen

She’s the original and only one of 4 LIs, which maybe it’s just me, but for a game based on an incredibly heteronormative reality show, allowing representation for queer audiences from launch is such a big deal and so cool to me, so Talia’s kind of special in my mind

She was also my first LI so nostalgia points

And she’s such an easy LI, not much drama on her route outside of Lucy, just her having MC’s back as the boys make themselves look like idiots

And she has so much potential, like I know some people think her only personality trait is fancying MC, which I mean, is a little fair, but there’s so many opportunities for her in fics and headcanons to develop the good amount of information we got on her in 13 days

I absolutely love how self-aware and confident she is

She just went for what she wanted, struggled a bit with commitment at first, because who wouldn’t, but after that it was smooth sailing

Like obviously what she said in the Beach Hut at the beginning of the season wasn’t great for MC, but she knew exactly what she wanted out of her time on the show

She was confident in herself and her sexuality so much so that she was just down to have a fling with a girl and not worry about how it would effect the show

And then she *coupled up* with that same girl, not even giving a shit about the rules or anything

A queen

Allegra:

I know she’s not an official LI, but her arc is what got me into writing so she gets a million points for that

I love what could have been done with her progression if she was given an actual route, I’m a sucker for some good enemies to lovers, but alas, she’s canonically a bad bitch with a lot of internalised homophobia yet enough confidence to ask MC out

I still love her

Marisol:

I know so many people hate her, and I get it, but I do really like her growth

Maybe it’s cuz I’m pretty analytical too, but her analyses never bothered me or anything, and now that I’ve played her route so many times, it’s pretty obvious that that’s a defense mechanism, and I understand that

She very much so has a “figure their weaknesses out before they have a chance to figure mine out” attitude, and I’m 99% positive it’s because of the ex that Elisa reminded her of

So not only has she been burned in the past, I’m willing to bet it was by the only woman she’s been in a serious relationship with

I really have no problem with her commitment issues, it’s understandable, and I can really empathise with her fear of coming out, it’s absolutely terrifying even if you’ve accepted it and bought a flag, saying the words can be really difficult

My biggest issue is her entitlement and immaturity, I guess?

Like her using Graham to make MC jealous just feels like an excuse to crack on with him and still have MC available for when she’s ready

I understand her being scared to couple up, but playing games to distract herself just made things with MC worse

And unless youre on her route, and sometimes even when you are, it’s clear to me that she expects things and has no problem saying what they are, but going after them is a problem?

Like her going after Lurik even though they don’t have a connection, or Gary even when he’s with Hannah

But then it never works and she gets sad and I melt because I’m weak

ALSO, can I just say how awful it is that Lucas and Henrik don’t pick her unless they have to???

Like cmon she deserves MC after that

And when they finally couple up? And she’s all soft? The GROWTH ohmygod

Anyway I love who Marisol became, maybe not everything she started out as, but definitely the person she ended the season as, more confident and self assured and willing to be vulnerable

It’s precious

Elisa:

I still haven’t done an Elisa route

I tried to a couple months ago, but dumping Marisol felt so cruel, what the hell was Fusebox thinking with that?? 

I do really like that they learned from their mistake though, even if they went in the opposite direction

From what I’ve seen of Elisa, she can be pretty sweet, I’ve seen her described as a Lucas-Bobby hybrid, and while that’s not the most interesting personality to me, I will say that she’s a really cool character that FB messed up on

Why did they make her a straight up villain???

And why ONLY her???

None of the other female LIs have been villains or had such a complete 180

Like her going from shouting at Chelsea, who is literally meant to be MC’s ride or die and the person outside of your LI that youre supposed to want to defend and avenge, to “i cant even sleep because im pining so hard”

I know the treatment of black women has been discussed before, specifically in regards to Hope and Erikah, and it is by no means my place to speak on it, but I definitely think something’s going on with Elisa

Anywayyyy, I love her archetype

The celebrity and influencer has so much potential, to the point that I wrote a one shot without even knowing her lmao 

And she’s so confident in a way that’s so different from Marisol

She doesn’t even care if MC’s happily coupled up, she WILL get in her pants and I respect that

In conclusion, Fusebox did her dirty and I’m probably going to try and retcon some canon for her in the future

Lottie:

Ohmygod

Lottie

A goth babe

Lottie

Yeah, anyway, so I love her

Her growth is just unbeatable in my opinion

Yeah, she still has her flaws by the end of the season, but she went from ready to rip everyone’s throat out to biting her tongue around Hannah

And her and MC???

And the development between them??? 

Ugh

No matter what way you swing it, you’ve either got best friends to lovers or enemies to lovers and I adore both

And her aesthetic is one of my favourites, I’m alt myself and having a character like that is just so cool

My Runaways MC is a ball of sunshine with some hidden darkness specifically because Lottie’s such a dark cloud but can start shining with the right person, and that’s my absolute favourite trope

But man were the wedding episodes a cop out

Why couldn’t they give her the Noah treatment? Or the single treatment? Where they just get together after the show? Same with Hannah, why are they giving such an intense confession after who knows how long of literally nothing, like no communication even????

Don’t get me wrong, I kinda simultaneously love it for the angst and yearning, but it just… makes no sense?

So yeah, amazing bat lady that I seriously vibe with and wish my MC could have wifed up

Hannah:

I know this is a little controversial buuuut

I fucking love Hannah

But only OGHannah, Returning Hannah was butchered and I will never let that go

And it was such a toxic message too, that she needed to change herself and her appearance just to get a guy to like her?

Fuck that, Original Hannah was amazing and perfect exactly as she was

I love her trope, too, the naivety and how obvious and clear it was that she’s still learning about the world and relationships, to the point that it’s going to get her in trouble

And her obsession with fairy tales? 

Fucking adorable ohmygod

I started a fic a while ago that I think I’m gonna scrap, that just indulged in the fairy tale metaphors and stuff because I just love how cute it is lmao

If she wasn’t dumped, I think she could have had amazing growth alongside Lottie, and their friendship/kinda, probably, most-definitely-if-MC’s-not-there-more-than-a-friendship growing together would have been so good

In an alternate reality Hope was dumped instead, and that helps me sleep at night

I firmly stand by the fact that Noah should have been the deciding factor between Hope and Hannah/MC, where Lottie said something that screwed with his head earlier in the day to make sure her friends were safe

Noah should have saved Hannah/MC and Hope should have returned with Rocco, hellbent on revenge and proving herself

That would have been so good for Noah stans and such good drama, that actually made perfect sense

Hope was fully expecting that she’d get picked by Noah because they’d spent three days attached at the hip and then to just… not have that happen. It would have driven her insane and if there was then a scene with MC where she just like, gives up

Like she’s spent the past two days grafting Noah but he won’t make up his mind and she’s just done and MC can comfort her or fight with her and you just get to humanize her make her vulnerable and hurting and I fucking WISH they did something like that, even for RHannah

And Hannah’s growth in the Villa would have been so amazing

I think her idea of a perfect guy is definitely too much, and I’m not advocating that she settles by any means, just that she could have learned that there are things more important than money

That conversation on day 1 where you choose between money, kindness, and intelligence still baffles me

Like why are you a gold digger Hannah?!?!

Why don’t you just want a Prince/ss Charming???

Her and Hope should have swapped and I don’t understand why they weren’t

I mean, I do really like Hope, but Hannah’s just so cute and has so much to learn and her struggling in the Villa just to have a lightbulb moment with MC would have been precious and now I want to write it dammit

Anyway, Hannah is adorable and had so much potential and she never should have returned if they were just going to scrap everything that made her Hannah, except for snooty literature

I wanna listen to her rattle on about Belle and Mulan and every other Disney Princess and what they meant for representation and progress in media and then compare them to their original stories like a dweeb and I would have melted on the spot

Like yes, please tell me more about how gruesome Cinderella is

She should have shown up at the finale and hugged MC and been innocent and sweet so I could have just lost my shit for like a half hour

But stan OGHannah, burn RHannah

AJ:

Adorable, precious, denied an arc outside of coming out

I am not exaggerating when I say that I cried at 4:30 in the morning at her blushing face when playing the first two days

It’s just so fucking cute and I’m a sap and I don’t know why it made me cry, but it did okay?!

And her coming out was such good representation!!! By far the best thing in Boat Party, and I’m so proud of the progress FB’s made in queer representation at the very least

I know she’s pretty one dimensional, but most of S3 is unfortunately

Her being available right off the bat was also such a win, I’m positive it’s the reason she had so many stans

If her and Yasmin had switched or her and Lily, they would have been the ones that were dominating Reddit polls and stuff

And I know she’s written as masc but I just can’t really see it? Like I can’t see her in a dress, but outside of a few clothing items, I guess I just can’t see it? Maybe androgynous is more the word for my image of her, like definitely a mix

She’ll wear a skirt under the right circumstances, but never a dress, a crop top with a flannel, her prom outfit that’s like a frilly jumpsuit, stuff like that? idk im not a lesbian

Her route for me was so glitchy, but I know that if MC’s stolen from her by Yasmin, Tai, or Ciaran, she has some really cute scenes and I wish I could have seen them

And I know some people were ragging on her for the eyelash at the end of the scene but I thought that was just a perfect callback - maybe it’s the writer in me

Basically, AJ’s adorable and why did Ciaran have to split her and MC up, not cool dude

Yasmin:

I forgot I was doing a Yasmin route a while ago, but from what I’ve seen and played, she’s really sweet 

I hate that she’s almost nonexistent outside of her route

Give us a mysterious musician friend, you cowards!

I saw that she sings to MC on the final date and damn is that cute

Her eyeshadow kinda throws me off, but her stuffed animal makes up for it

And I’m salty that Yasmin the Lamb disappeared too, that was such a nice detail that made me start a Yasmin route

She’s distant and self-assured, but has a soft, gooey, nostalgic center and I wish we saw more of that, even if we weren’t on her route

My final thoughts on Yasmin: An artsy indie icon that I really need to stop getting distracted from and finish her route

Lily:

Again, don’t know much about her, but she seems really cool

Her shaving her head between the finale and Boat Party is such a flex and I wish she did it right before Boat Party so we could see her in all her bald glory

She’s into cars, right? And… architecture?

Idk, I barely remember my own name, let alone a 10 minute date from months ago

But I’ll definitely get around to doing her route at some point, maybe just to write for her, we’ll see

Elladine:

I know she’s not an LI, but MC so should have been able to run away with her

I missed that option in S3

I kinda get why they didn’t do that, but Boat Party’s just so messy in general

And I would include Genevieve here, but she’s so cute with Seb that I’d feel bad splitting them up

But Elladine had actual problems with Nicky!!!

Why did they mention it for it to never pay off??

And I’m so mad that the hype around her died when it was revealed she wasn’t an LI or the badass of the season, because I still adore how sweet she is

I also want to brag that before we got a name I was calling her Emma and that’s just on example of my almost psychic-ness

But yeah I wanted Ell to be a run away option and I’m salty that she wasn’t

Know what, fuck it, Viv too, she’s smart and cool as hell, let us love these awesome women FB, you cowards!!!

I have no idea who would be my number 1 based on canon, but if we’re talking hypotheticals, I think my answer, as strange as it is, is Hannah.

I just love what she could have been, but by no means what she is. 

It’s so awkward to know her for three days, not see her for three weeks, then spend a couple more days with, a couple weeks at most, just for her to write a whole ass book about MC?? And tell her about it with that hair????

No thanks, I’ll stick with closeted sapphic horse girl nerd Hannah because I guess that’s somehow my type??? Oh god what the fuck I swear I’m not a total weirdo

[ramblings-of-a-mad-cat]

Hogwarts Mystery Survey!

I was tagged by...well, a few people actually! Sorry, I know it took me a while to get to this, as it always does with tagged posts. Nevertheless! This was created by the epic @carewyncromwell So go check out her blog!

I shall now signal @missnight0wl​ @electricslytherindog​ @nostalgiaslithersin​ @ladyluckqueen​ and @treebels​ Unless you’ve already done this, of course. But otherwise square up! Y’all have been tagged :)

Let’s do this! 

Favourite Gryffindor: 

Oh, I’m not going to make many friends with this choice...

But my favorite Gryffindor is Patricia Rakepick. Look, even if she turns out to be completely evil with no plot twists about her loyalties...at least they gave us a genuinely evil Gryffindor, right? I’m sorry, I just...really want to believe we don’t know the whole story. Because Year 5 gave us so many great moments with Rakepick, as well as her bond with MC. The Potterverse has never had a character quite like Rakepick before, but she’s just as interesting as Snape or Dumbledore. She’s infinitely complex and it’s such a waste if she amounts to nothing more than the Cabal’s lackey. Honorable mentions: Jae Kim. He is such a mood. 

Least Favourite Gryffindor: 

Did you think we were done talking about Rakepick? Oh no, because right now she is my least favorite Gryffindor too, for reasons that are much more obvious and don’t really need to be explained. She’s done terrible things, and she needs to pay for her crimes...and on a personal level, she broke my heart. I don’t want this to be how her story ends. I don’t want to hate her, but with what she’s done, what else am I supposed to think? 

Favourite Hufflepuff: 

You can tell that the Haywood sisters were the main project for Hufflepuff, and while I find both of them to be quite interesting, I just have a real soft spot for Beatrice. I love the way she went from being a tiny Penny to being anything but. I love how she went from being little more than a plot device in Year 5 to forcibly carving her own identity in Year 6. I like the parallels between her and MC and Jacob. Both sisters are interesting, so you can consider Penny an honorable mention, I just like Bea more. 

Least Favourite Hufflepuff: 

Sorry to any of his fans, but...it’s got to be Diego. I will fully admit that we do not know enough about him right now to judge fairly, but that is, in some ways, the problem. When I first saw him in Year 5, he gave me the impression of being a total sleaze who would be weird toward the other students (particularly the females) because he was into them. And while the scenes he eventually gets haven’t really given credence to that...they haven’t disproved it either.

Favourite Ravenclaw: 

Let me tell  you a fairy tale, everyone: Once upon a time there was a fascinating and compelling character, a queen of pranks, who had a curious history with the girl who was the game’s antagonist at the time. She had a great bond with MC and a cool backstory...but the developers soon forgot she existed, and removed her from the dating quests even though she had already been there for the first two. This is the story of the underrated flower. The tale of the toad-keeper. This is the story of Tulip Karasu.

Least Favourite Ravenclaw:

Probably Andre. For similar reasons to why I don’t like Diego that much, I just don’t think his character was handled very well. Don’t get me wrong, he had a promising start....but then they didn’t do anything with him. Furthermore, his personality just isn’t my favorite. He strikes me as being a little self-absorbed and not especially nice to other people, at least from the vibes that I get.

Favourite Slytherin: 

Let me tell you a fairy tale, everyone. About the toad-keeper’s true love, the song of the shadows...Merula Snyde. Okay, okay, no more fairy tales. But in all seriousness, she’s a a real contender for being my favorite character in the game. Right up there with Rakepick. I just find Merula to have so many layers to her character, she has so much history influencing her actions. And yeah, she’s frustrating as all hell, but that’s part of it. And while she may be an acquired taste, I know I’m not alone in thinking that she can be positively adorable.  She’s a character that I hope reaches her full potential, a character I just wish I could rescue and get her the therapy she needs.

Least Favourite Slytherin: 

This one is genuinely tough for me. None of the Slytherin characters in this game are badly written, and none of them are that unlikable. Do I pick Ismelda, for her stunt with the Love Potion? Well, even in spite of that, I find myself hoping she can learn from her mistakes. Do I pick Barnaby, because as sweet as he is, he’s normally kind of one-note? Well, even in spite of that, I always love it when he’s onscreen. Could go for Felix, but he’s actually my favorite Prefect, and choosing a Prefect for a least favorite would feel way too easy anyhow. No, let’s go with Liz. Don’t get me wrong, I adore Liz. But she’s extremely under-utilized and we just don’t know that much about her. 

Favourite Quidditch Character: 

This one, on the other hand, doesn’t require any pondering at all. It’s Orion. I can’t even begin to describe how much I love this lonely sage. He deserves the world. He deserves a hug from his Quidditch family. Every time he’s onscreen, passing on his wisdom, I just get a big goofy smile on my face. He’s basically all the best parts of Dumbledore, and he’s a better big brother to MC than Jacob could ever be. Also, his hair is fantastic and I can’t wait until I get him to LV 10 because I want it. 

Least Favourite Quidditch Character:

This one is purely a matter of choosing someone by process of elimination. It’s not Orion, of course, and if you’ve been on my blog for a while then you know I do not hate Skye Parkin at all, so it isn’t her. I also quite like Murphy, so...the only character left, who we still don’t know that much about, is Erika Rath. In this case, “least favorite” is a default term. I like Erika and I will gladly defend her...just, not as much as the team trio.

Favourite Teacher: 

My immediate answer is Flitwick. Even though McGonagall is one of my favorite characters overall, from the original books...when it comes to HPHM, she hasn’t been as involved. Flitwick on the other hand, has gotten fantastic development as a character and some genuinely great moments of bonding with MC. He was one of the nicest surprises about this game. There are so many little things - like him realizing, without MC needing to say anything, that they are going to keep pursuing Beatrice’s rescue no matter what he says. Another moment I love comes in Year Three, when he’s the only Head of House to show any sympathy to MC about banning them from Hogsmeade. Unlike the other Heads, you really get the sense that Flitwick doesn’t want to do so, that he’s being overruled by Dumbledore. An honorable mention could go to Rakepick, but....eh. 

Least Favourite Teacher: 

I’m gonna get a bit out of the ordinary for this one. Sure, I could say Snape, but in this game he’s miles beyond his usual quality. He’s much more tolerable and even pretty funny sometimes. Sprout is kinda boring to me, I suppose, but she’s not that bad. I don’t know if Dumbledore technically counts, and Filch certainly wouldn’t. Rakepick, despite everything she did, was technically a good teacher. No, for my least favorite teacher, I’m gonna go with Madam Hooch. I’ve never liked her. Not just in this game, either. One moment she says “I don’t believe you, but I don’t have any proof you’re lying.” and then five seconds later, “Don’t ever let me catch you in a lie again.” I’m sorry, what do you mean again? Not believing someone is not the same thing as “catching” them in a lie, you arrogant bludger. 

Favourite Non-Teacher Adult: 

Both in the books and in the game, it is Hagrid and it will always be Hagrid. He is the biggest cinnamon roll and I would gladly eat his rock cakes no matter what they do to my teeth. Friends are more important than teeth! Just let MC take a break from all this Cursed Vault nonsense and go off to the Reserve with Hagrid to pet some nifflers.

Least Favourite Non-Teacher Adult: 

Folks, here’s a fairy tale about-no, we’re not doing that again. It’s Dumbledore. The punch line is Dumbledore. Setting aside all of the terrible things that he does in the books...HPHM sees him constantly rewarding MC’s dangerous behavior and once again stuffing the ballot for the House Cup...only to abruptly change his tune at the end of Year Four and give MC a year’s worth of detentions for doing what he previously encouraged, and only MC gets these detentions, not their friends. The very next year, he sanctions Rakepick’s apprentice team and they continue where MC left off. Not to mention that post Portrait-Vault, Dumbledore appoints himself as MC’s makeshift therapist and keeps talking like he understands MC’s feelings, like he knows what’s best for them. The game fucking forces you to tell him about your feelings, and god damn it where is the option to say “None of your business.” Like UGH. 

Rate Rowan on a scale of 1-10, 1 being “Why are we even friends?” and 10 being “BFFs for Life!”: 

100,000,000. What’s that you say? I went well over the cap? Nonsense. I simply gave Rowan a score as high as they deserve. I know we are all appreciating them a lot more now, for obvious reasons...but I can recall back in the day when most people didn’t spare them a second glance. (Though to be fair, MC didn’t either, some of the time.) Not me though. I was always loyal, thank you very much. I always knew this adorkable cinnamon roll who would have taken a bullet for MC (and...pretty much did.) deserved more love. They deserved the world.

Rate Jacob on a scale of 1-10, 1 being “You’re dead to me” and 10 being “Love you forever, big bro!!”:

A solid 5. I believe that’s the only score I can fairly give, because there’s still so much of Jacob that is uncertain and hasn’t been explored. But the character we released from the Portrait, assuming it is the real Jacob...has been kind of an asshole since he got back. On the other hand, he was sealed in a Portrait for five years. Five times longer than even Beatrice was. That has to mess a person up, right? So perhaps I should be more forgiving. I honestly don’t know. 

Rate MC and your similarities on a scale of 1-10, 1 being “MC is nothing like me” to 10 being “MC is ttly a self-insert lol”: 

Is this just like, MC in general? Or our own personal MCs? Because with Gail...I’d have to say, maybe a 4. She does inherit some of my qualities but she’s primarily inspired from one of my friends. Luca, though? Luca is easily a 9. After all, when I first created them, I used a file that was once my “personal” file. So it was that they inherited a lot of them-self from me.

Favourite Side Quest: 

You’re all going to think that I’m weird, but my favorite quest, at least right now, is the Comet TLSQ. I like it for a lot of the reasons that people hate it. I think that it’s an interesting and amusing story. How can I not love a quest that ends with a whole field of cruppies? Beyond that, if was during this quest that I really grew to love the Quidditch characters as a team. And, yes, this quest only made me enjoy Skye as a character all the more. What can I say, I just had a big smile on my face during the whole ordeal, especially when the three Quidditch characters were together. Honorable mentions: The Frog Choir TLSQ. I’m a major Tulula shipper, enough said.

Least Favourite Side Quest:

The one that immediately comes to my mind is the Knighthood TLSQ. I’m sorry but the whole thing just felt incredibly pointless. Why does MC even want to be a knight? Couldn’t they be doing something better with their time, like pursuing the next vault, doing some homework, practicing Quidditch, playing Gobstones with friends or....basically anything else? Sir Cadogan is funny in small doses but he gets old really quickly. He has that in common with Lockhart. Oh, and Penny is shoe-horned in. Again. Big surprise. 

Your Ideal Ending for Patricia Rakepick: 

-Sigh- Okay, you all know what’s coming. I don’t really want Rakepick to die. I don’t want her to go to Azkaban. I’m convinced that she probably will die no matter what, but that isn’t what I want. First and foremost, I want her to be a double agent. Working for Dumbledore or otherwise. I want Rowan’s death to have been staged - not just because it would absolve her of the crime, but also because it would mean Rowan comes back...and that the forest scene would actually make sense. There’s no explaining away her torturing Merula, other than her stalling for time, which isn’t an excuse but it would be enough to return her to being the “ruthless good” that she was before. I want her to sacrifice her own life for MC and Merula, but she need not necessarily die in the process. She could be saved. On the other hand, a death might be more poignant. But if not that, she could go on the run. I mean, she did cast an Unforgivable on a child. I’m not sure even Dumbledore’s protection could get her out of paying for that. Either way, I want her to blindside R the same way she blind-sided us in the Portrait Vault. 

I made it to the end! And somehow, I managed to praise Beatrice, Merula, and Skye...along with bashing Dumbledore...and insisting that Rakepick is secretly good, all in one post! This is like...the ultimate trailer for my blog. 

[mysterylover123]

BNHA Rewatch: Two Heroes

mysterylover123

And before we start Season 3, one more road stop: The Big Freaking Movie, Two Heroes, last year’s surprise anime blockbuster and HeroAca’s first excursion onto the big screen. Time to share my thoughts and rewatch this very entertaining film!

We open with bald eagles, deserts, and cowpoke themes, to make sure we know we’re in America. We fly into “California” which looks more like Las Vegas (not really complaining, I loooove that they picked my hometown state for this) to find young, white schlera eye-having All Might and his hunky bro David Shield kicking ass and taking names. My state’s name, to be precise. 

Some exposition follows, basically recapping the premise of HeroAca, as I’m reminded of what a stroke of genius Hori had when he decided to make the MC an easy expositor thanks to his geeky knowledge of all things Hero. Deku will always be Captain Exposition.

Melissa! She’s fun and adorable and amazing, and I just love that the first HeroAca movie chooses to focus on a geeky, kind and energetic lady. 

Deku looking back and forth between Melissa’s breasts and All Might’s crotch belt is peak Bi energy.

I’m so jealous that Melissa gets to touch Deku’s hand.

Melissa describing All Might as someone David ‘loves’ is just throwing away all pretence of his heterosexuality, if it ever existed. How the hell did this guy end up with a kid?

Deku blushing around and enthusing over both Melissa and David is max bi energy.

Uraraka’s Annoying Crush Counter: 5

But I’m glad the girls are here! The Bones animators clearly know well what the fanbase wants to see, choosing to give all 6 class 1-A girls at least a cameo in the film, and three of them involved in the main plot. I especially love that, despite being initially pitted against each other, Uraraka and Melissa develop a bit of a womance in the film. OchaLissa ship!

My one major regret about this film is that Mineta is included in the Main Cast. I wish either Mina or Tsuyu had come along for the ride instead - one, they’re better, more lovable characters who could do the same job he does, and two, then we’d have a nearly gender-even cast! (6 Boys: Deku, Katsuki, Tenya, Shoto, Kiri, Kaminari; 5 Girls: Ochaco, Momo, Jiro, Melissa, Mina or Tsu). 

Kacchan makes his appearance! This bit was leaked online before the film’s release and drew quite a lot of ire from BKDK shippers and Bakugo fans. I’m mostly annoyed that Deku is acting OOC here; this is Post-Final Exam Deku, post Hero Killer Deku. Would the guy who punched All Might in the face and Bakugo in the face and the Hero Killer in the face be cowering in fear behind Iida, the guy whose life he saved, from the guy he, only a few weeks ago, punched in the face?! Badass Deku Rights!

Ooh a wild Todobaku moment! I always love when they bicker. Or rather, Katsuki bickers and Shoto ignores him.

OH NO you cannot slap me with the Ingenium OST theme and hardcore feels out of nowhere! God this scene is heartbreaking. I love, however, the cut to the whole of Class 1-A and Melissa when they talk about the future.

AH Bakugo’s feet! Why are we staring up his crotch? So this movie has a lot of KiriBaku scenes, and I should probably talk about them a little, since their friendship is a big deal in S3. They’re the only major HeroAca ship I’ve never shipped as a romantic pairing, per se. Like, in this scene, I see Kiri as Katsuki’s wingman, his bro, the guy who teases him about his obvious feelings from someone, not as the guy he has feelings for.

And for Kiri’s sake, I kinda dislike making him basically Bakugo’s sidekick. He willingly hangs out with the guy, when he wants to, in canon, he doesn’t follow him around and become the butt of the joke, and he has lots of other relationships in canon to draw from, so this dynamic between them doesn’t appeal to me.

Melissa being a quirkless kid like Deku is a great idea for the film, especially since she and David still find a way to help others. They’re a brighter image of the person Izuku could have been. 

Full Gauntlet is pretty cool

Everyone dresses up pretty! The movie suits/dresses are awesome and (almost) everyone looks great. Why Deku is wearing a baggy zoot-suity mess is beyond me, but hey, he sheds it pretty quickly so I’m not complaining. 

If by ‘female assassin’ you mean Beauty Queen. Jiro is gorgeous.

OK the plot ensues! Darn, I could’ve easily enjoyed a movie that was just everyone hanging out and goofing off...ah well, I still love what we got.

This villain does what neither Tomura nor All for One could ever do! Subdue All Might! My god he’s a criminal mastermind!

Deku wants to help, and everyone but Shoto basically piles on the bandwagon afterwards. “And me!” “And me!” “Me too!” “And Me” “Nobody cares Mineta.” I like how they bring up the Powers dilemma, since that’s a big deal in Season 3.

I was pretty impressed by the amount of level grinding our heroes had to do to make it to the top floor. 200 freaking floors, that’s impressive.

Todoroki saved Bakugo! Yay! BTW I love all the tactical planning stuff in this portion, and how lots of characters get to contribute.

10 little superheroes, trying to save the day. Two got lost and then there were eight.

8 little superheroes, escaping from the garden. One saved the others and then there were seven.

7 little superheroes running against the sea, four were trapped by robots and then there were three. (i don’t count mineta). 

Three little superheroes, reached the top and flew; one had to float them so then there were two. (she’s fine, Bakugo saved her. Save to win!)

Two little superheroes, faced with a gun. One fell out the window and then there was - never mind, she saved him, he’s fine.

That was fun. Anyway, to sum, the group gets split up as they work to get to the top, leaving only Deku and Melissa to reach the final boss dungeon. Highlights include the usual Kamijiro bantering, Todobaku making an awesome combat move, Uraraka standing against the coming onslaught of robots in a weirdly dramatic scene, and Reciproburst.

Dislikes include Kirishima being portrayed as not much use and kind of stupid (c’mon, he can do better than that!) and Uraraka not getting to kick any real ass other than floating Melissa and Deku. 

So we make it to Dramatic Plot Twist Tower and find out that David set up the whole thing. I joke, but I actually didn’t see this coming the first time around and was genuinely surprised. I also think it fits really well with the story they’re telling here: about trying to hold onto the past and forgetting to look to the future. I usually measure good plot twists in terms of how they change the story, characters and themes, and this one does.

On the other hand, Sam betraying him is just kind of silly. “Oh no, not...that guy!”

The villain being named Wolfram makes me wonder if there are any secret Buffyverse fans on Bones’ writing staff. With the next movie’s villain be named Hart?

I love how Melissa is a quirkless character who gets to save the day every bit as much as the powered ones. Also, Deku is freaking awesome in this scene, ngl. It has vibes of his fight with Muscular, that “pinned by an unstoppable wall” thing.

And this has vibes of Deku vs Overhaul trying to save Eri. OMG S4 IS GONNA KILL ME. Anyway Deku tries really really hard to save David Shield and does lots of cool leaps and gets beaten up while doing it, enough to earn some of Wolfram’s respect, but is unable to. Fortunately...

Watashi Ga Kita!

But then...duh duh duh! Wolfram has that power-enhancer-plot MacGuffin! Actually, it’s not a MacGuffin now, because now we the audience kind of care about it. It has weight, it’s significant. The characters care about it, but there’s more to it than just being an interchangeable object.

I LOVE how they animated the metal on this guy. That’s Metalbending. OMG. 

Class 1-A showing up and kicking ass as always. I just wanna quibble for a second with how this movie uses Howitzer Impact: a giant mind-blowing explosion in manga canon, a small underwhelming fizzle here.

DUH DUH DUH DRAMATIC PLOT TWIST. Again this one floored me the first time around. My jaw actually dropped when AFO’s theme started playing. Holy crap WHAH How what how. I’m not as excited about this plot twist, as it basically just happens for the sake of being shocking, but hey, that is clearly something AFO would do, and I like seeing him and hearing his theme here anyway, so who cares. Just roll with it!

And now, the reason this movie was made and the premise behind it. We never, in the canon of the manga, actually get to see All Might and Deku fight the same villain at the same time, so the movie I think was made for that purpose: DOUBLE DELAWARE DETROIT SMASH + YSR

OH YOU SAY RUN. You could soundtrack a scene of people sitting around staring at the wall and turn it into the most epic thing ever. I will never get tired of this beautiful, peerless, impossibly good composition. And this is honestly one of my favorite YSR scenes, because dayum, you can’t get much cooler than the Double DD smash. 

Visual storytelling here is on point. David Shield’s image of All Might turning into Deku is perfect.

We end on a sunrise, fittingly, and Long Hope Philia sountracked credits - with a small bit of depressing to end on, as we see David is probably gonna get arrested and All Might can’t do nothing about it.

Two Heroes is great. My quibbles with it are all minor. It’s the perfect first movie for BNHA; it is big and bombastic and action-packed, but more important, it gets what MHA is about at it’s core. BNHA is a story about the prior generation of heroes (and villains) passing the torch down to the next one. You know, like how teachers pass info onto their students in Academia. The movie gets that, and it delivers it with aplomb. It’s a great script, every scene and moment is necessary and everything happens in the right place and right order. It’s a thrill to watch, and I can’t even begin to imagine what insane stuff they’re gonna put in Movie #2 BKDK Boogaloo. Starting S3 tomorrow!

BKDK CORNER:

On a rewatch, I’m a little more OK with this scene, because Deku pretty quickly bucks up and takes the challenge - and he doesn’t exactly cower from Kacchan, Iida just gets in the way. I also love that gay sounding “Kacchan, people are watching!” line in the sub. 

All of Deku’s Love interests where white flowers on their fancy wear.

NGL this is my favorite part of the movie. That is the sweetest, softest, most endearing smile Bakugo has ever had, and Todoroki seeing it and smirking is just perfect. Baku is peak Tsundere in this scene.

RANKER: The Formal Wear

Girls:

4. Momo - I like the tiara, and the dress is kind of a nice color.

3. Melissa - pretty but a little birthday cake-y.

2. Ochaco - Very cute and well-tailored. The tights really sell it.

1. Jiro - unconventional is the winner of the day here.

Boys:

6. Izuku - Deku where the f did you get that suit? Take it off, please. Why is your taste in clothing so bad.

5. Kirishima - it’s ok, but a little generic.

4. Kaminari - the waiter look isn’t half bad on him

3. Iida - sharp dressed, of course. It looks nice!

2. Todoroki - perfectly handsome, and of course his suit is white.

1. Bakugo - that vest tho. damn.