#like sirius could kill somebody and james would be like: it should be legal when he does it

[comets0ksure]

firm believer that at SOME POINT when the marauders were at school, james had a crush on sirius

just a little baby crush-

but it definitely existed

(and it was definitely reciprocated)

(and it was more than a baby crush)

[imaginejamesandsirius]

James comes back as a vampire 12 years after the fact (so 3rd year for harry in like december) and the law says children can't live alone with vampires so James has to marry someone by the end of the school year or harry goes back to his aunt and uncle. James starts to panic until Remus informs him that gay marriage has since been legalized, after which he proposes to Sirius, and he says yes and they're very in love and it's so cute

Hogwarts had vampire wards. James hadn't known about that. His idea had been to march right up to Dumbledore and ask what the hell he was thinking, leaving his son with two muggles that hated magic, but he couldn't get through. It's not like he'd been planning on kidnapping Harry (well, he’d considered it but decided otherwise), but he wanted to see him. It had been over a decade. The last time he'd seen his boy, he'd been a baby; he could say a handful of babbled words and run around, and that had been it.

James gave a frustrated kick to the impenetrable wall that was keeping him from seeing his son, then whirled away to find Remus. He'd already seen in the paper that Sirius was an escaped convict, which wouldn't make him easy to find. Remus, however, was very likely still in Wales, staying in his parent's old house.

He needed somebody to help him plan. There were a dozen different things that needed to be done, and he no idea how to accomplish any of it. Which he wasn't used to. Becoming a vampire had changed more than just his diet.

For the first five years, sunlight had burned him, so he couldn't leave if he wanted to. And his sire hadn't wanted for him to leave, so he'd been unable to. It was only when his sire bit off more than he could chew-- centaur, you'd think he would've known better, even if their blood was supposedly ambrosia-- that James had been able to leave the grounds. And he wasn't too sure about whether or not immortality was a myth, but he did know that his body hadn't changed appearance since his transition. He wouldn't be surprised if, sixty years from now, he dropped dead from old age and that was the end of it.

Most importantly right now though, was the fact that he couldn't think. His mind was muddled. All he could think about was how angry he was with Dumbledore for having left Harry with Lily's horrid sister and her husband. A couple that James knew for a fact hated him, and he couldn't imagine that they would be any kinder to Harry now than they'd been when he was a baby. The need to protect Harry was burning him from the inside out.

He knew that Remus was the only person he trusted that was available to help him, so he went to his house. It was empty. James gave a frustrated snarl and left just as quickly as he'd arrived. Where the hell could he be?

He walked for a long time. Long enough that the sun set and he was walking in total darkness. Perk of being a vampire was that he could still see. He'd been hoping that he wouldn't need glasses anymore, but he did. He should find sunglasses though, for when the sun came back up. It didn't burn him anymore, but it was awfully bright; he'd spent all day squinting against it.

*

As it turned out, he hadn't been able to find Remus because Moony had been at Hogwarts, teaching Defense. James had been hanging around Hogsmeade when there was a weekend out for the students, and that's how he saw Harry again. He was a little ashamed to say that he'd scared him. He hadn't meant to, but he'd sort of grabbed him away from his friends, and then he'd seen Snape and his fangs came out and... yeah, it was better not to dwell on it.

All's well that ends well, because Sirius found him that afternoon because of the commotion, and Harry had actually looked happy to see him when he had to head back inside Hogwarts for the night.

"I can't believe you're here," Sirius whispered. He was looking at James like he was a miracle.

James knew the feeling. When he'd learned that Harry had been living with the Dursley's, he'd thought that Sirius was dead. It hadn't taken long before he was in Wizarding London and saw all the Wanted posters, but a part of him had still wondered. After all, if Sirius had been alive, there would've been no reason for him to be in Azkaban, and if he had been in Azkaban, there was no reason for him to have waited so long to bust out.

He didn't understand any of it. He didn't know how things had gotten so bad so quickly. He'd been Turned, and Lily had been killed, but Sirius had been Harry's godfather, and if he hadn't been around for whatever reason, Harry should've gone to Remus! There was a line of people that Harry should've been raised by, and the Dursley's were nowhere in that line.

"What happened?" James asked instead of replying to what Sirius said. "What the hell happened?"

Sirius shook his head. He threw his arms around James and started to cry. James held him while he sobbed, and then for a long time afterwards.

Dumbledore sent him a patronus requesting a meeting, and Sirius transformed into Padfoot and made himself scarce.

James would love nothing more than to meet with Dumbledore and ask just what the hell he had been thinking for the past twelve years, but there was a little snag of he couldn't get through the bloody wards. He sent a reply saying basically that, and a minute later, Dumbledore came out to him.

Before hello's could be exchanged, James said, "How could you send Harry to live with those people?"

"With you gone, Lily and Marlene dead, and Sirius in prison, they were the only legal option," Dumbledore replied calmly.

"What about Remus?"

"Werewolves can't raise children alone, and Remus was not married."

"That's bullshit." And it must've been made into a law after him and Lily went into hiding, because it sure as hell hadn't been one when they set everything up.

"Personal feelings aside, it is the law." Dumbledore hesitated, then said, "Vampires are also unable to raise children unless they are married to a non-creature."

James paled, a cold fear sweeping through him. "What? But- Harry's my son. No one could keep him from me."

They continued talking, and Dumbledore explained the law and when it had been passed. There was all sorts of anti-creature legislation now, and it was throwing a wrench in James's half put together plans. In the course of their conversation, James was able to convince Dumbledore that Sirius was innocent. He didn't even know what Sirius had supposedly done, but he was able to convince Dumbledore of it.

*

Potter Mansion wasn't in great condition, but it was empty, and both him and Sirius could stay there. When winter break came around, Remus stayed with them as well. He wished that Harry could, but his guardianship was up in the air, and having him stay would be more like kidnapping than him spending the break with his father.

Sirius was in the process of being cleared of all charges, but since it hadn't gone through yet, he didn't have the legal right to raise Harry. Remus and James were creatures, so it's not like they'd be spontaneously allowed to raise him.

"I hate this," James said. He was sipping on blood, and Remus was nursing a cup of tea. Sirius was upstairs, sleeping. He spent a lot of his time sleeping so that he could recover faster, but it was still a slow process. By the time his name was cleared, he probably wouldn't look like a walking skeleton anymore. Skeletal or not, James still thought he was the most beautiful person he'd ever seen.

He did wish that the Ministry would hurry up. They said that it would be at least a year before Sirius would have the restrictions lifted, but it would likely take longer than that. James wasn't sure there was a rhyme or reason to the different rules, and he hated it. For instance, he was able to live on his own if he wanted, but he couldn't be the sole guardian of a child. He could travel around Great Britain, but he wasn't supposed to fly or use a portkey. One toe out of line, and Sirius could be arrested until the verdict was reached.

"Being a vampire?" Remus guessed.

"No. This whole custody mess with Harry. I can't raise him unless I get married, but who the hell am I supposed to marry? If I had a friend who was willing, it would be easy, but everyone I knew is dead. Which means I have to find some bird and convince her to marry me even though I don't love her."

Remus looked at him for a long moment.

Misinterpreting what the look meant, James said, "See? It sucks. There's no way I'm going to pull it off. Harry's going to get sent back to that sodding house where they hate him."

"James, some things have changed since you were last here."

"Don't even try to tell me that they don't hate magic, because Harry told me, and-"

"No, not that," Remus said with a small smile. "I meant that two men can get married now. It's legal."

James jerked, sitting up straight and looking at Remus with an intense focus that he hadn't been able to manage before he was a vampire. "Say again?"

"Two men can get married." You and Sirius can get married.

"You’re a genius. Is Sirius allowed to get married right now?"

Remus nodded. "I checked. I thought it was weird that you didn't already do it, but." He shrugged, and James understood. He hadn't known that he could marry another man, and Remus had thought there was a legal boundary that he hadn't been aware of, so he'd checked for them.

"Huh." James looked down into his glass of blood like it had the answers he was looking for. "How should I propose? I want it to be great. Something he can look back on and know how much I love him."

"I'm not great at romance," Remus said, scratching at his ear uncomfortably. "So erm, all I'm going to say that Sirius always knows how much you love him."

It was a nice idea, but Remus didn't know how insecure Sirius could be. It had only gotten worse since all their time apart. James understood, and he didn't begrudge Sirius for it for a second, but he also wasn't going to talk to Remus about it. Some things were personal. "Yeah. I'm sure I'll think of something. I just want it to be perfect."

"I'm sure it will be," Remus said, giving him a comforting smile.

*

"I love you so much," James said softly, brushing Sirius's hair away from his face. Not that it had been in his face very much to begin with.

Sirius smiled. It wasn't wide and overtaking his entire face; it was a small, private thing. Like if there was anyone else in the room, he would still want for James to be the only one to see it.

"I hated having to live without you for so long. I kept wanting to get out. I dreamt about getting home to find you and Harry waiting for me."

"I'm sorry it wasn't like that," Sirius said, regret and sorrow making his voice weak.

"No, that's not what I mean. I mean that thinking about you got me through it. I couldn't see the sun for so long, but when I thought about you, I didn't feel as trapped. You were my warmth. My freedom. There were times that I worried I was putting you on a pedestal. That I'd get out and find that you weren't how I remembered, but you're not. Things have changed, but you're still the person I fell in love with. You're as amazing and perfect as I thought you were when we first started dating. I never want to live without you. I want us to be a family the way we should've been this entire time. You, me, Harry, and Moony in the other room, rolling his eyes at us."

"I want that too. It sounds perfect."

"You think so?"

Sirius gave a small nod.

"I'm glad to hear you say that, because I was thinking... well, Remus told me that we can get married now. It's legal."

Sirius froze, then pushed himself up so he could look James in the eye. "This isn't a joke, right? You can't be joking about this. I need you to mean it."

"I mean it. You're everything I want. I love you. I want us to be together for the rest of our lives. I want to call you my husband. So, will you? Will you marry me?"

Sirius looked like he was about to cry, but they were happy tears this time. He opened his mouth to say something, but his breath hitched and he closed it again. He nodded.

"Yeah?" James said, a grin stealing across his face.

Sirius nodded again, and James pulled him into a tight hug.

"I love you so much." Things might've been shit when he first got here, but everything was falling into place, where it should've been from the start.

[hufflly-puffs]

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince

Chapter 29: The Phoenix Lament

“And a Death Eater’s dead, he got hit by a Killing Curse the huge blond one was firing off everywhere – Harry, if we hadn’t had your Felix potion, I think we’d all have been killed, but everything seemed to just miss us –’”- We know using Felix Felicis is illegal if you enter a competition and that you should not use it too often, but this made me wonder if it wouldn’t be useful for Aurors to use the potion if they are facing particular dangerous situations? But also, what if the other side would have used Felix Felicis as well? Luck is not biased, it can not decide between good or bad. If the Death Eaters had used the potion the luck would have been on their side. Given that the potion helped Ginny and the others staying alive shows how powerful it really is, so perhaps it should be banned completely, because it can be abused as well.

“‘I’d love to know what Snape told him to convince him,’ said Tonks. ‘I know,’ said Harry, and they all turned to stare at him. ‘Snape passed Voldemort the information that made Voldemort hunt down my mum and dad. Then Snape told Dumbledore he hadn’t realised what he was doing, he was really sorry he’d done it, sorry that they were dead.’ ‘And Dumbledore believed that?’ said Lupin incredulously. ‘Dumbledore believed Snape was sorry James was dead? Snape hated James …’ ‘And he didn’t think my mother was worth a damn, either,’ said Harry, ‘because she was Muggle-born … “Mudblood���, he called her …’” – And this shows how dangerous it can be if you only know half the truth. Even Lupin, who knows that Lily and Snape had been friends as children, doubts Snape’s motive. The only encounter between his mother and Snape Harry is aware of is the memory of him calling her ‘Mudblood’. He doesn’t know their history and the circumstances, but it fits into everything else Harry knows about Snape: that as a Death Eater he would obviously despise Muggleborn witches and wizards. To Lupin the situation reads the same; we later learn that Lily broke off her friendship with Snape after this incident and perhaps even she was not aware of the fact that Snape never stopped loving her. The only people who did know were Dumbledore and Voldemort, though the later never understood love and the things people are willing to risk for it. Dumbledore took Snape’s secret to the grave and Harry only knows half of the story, leaving out the important bit, the real reason why Dumbledore had trusted Snape.

“As Professor McGonagall nodded, Harry felt Ginny move beside him and looked at her. Her slightly narrowed eyes were fixed upon Fleur, who was gazing down at Bill with a frozen expression on her face. […]‘You thought I would not weesh to marry him? Or per’aps, you ’oped?’ said Fleur, her nostrils flaring. ‘What do I care how ’e looks? I am good-looking enough for both of us, I theenk! All these scars show is zat my husband is brave! And I shall do zat!’ she added fiercely, pushing Mrs Weasley aside and snatching the ointment from her.” – Both Ginny and Mrs Weasley suspect that now that Bill is injured, that he is no longer as handsome as he used to be and there might be some other after-effects of the wolf-bite, Fleur is no longer interested in him and will leave him. And of course Fleur’s initial reaction is shock. But it turns out she is less superficial than they thought. Yes, Bill is/was handsome and of course there was a physical attraction between them, but it does not mean they don’t love each other genuinely. Fleur could possibly have any man she wants, so there must be something about Bill that she wants to spend the rest of her life with him, something that goes deeper than attraction. For better or for worse indeed.

“And the meaning of Tonks’s Patronus and her mouse-coloured hair, and the reason she had come running to find Dumbledore when she had heard a rumour someone had been attacked by Greyback, all suddenly became clear to Harry; it had not been Sirius that Tonks had fallen in love with after all …” – I still think it is quite interesting how Tonks’s heartbreak manifests. It is so profound that Harry mistook it for grief. It changed Tonks’s hair, so that it took the same colour as Lupin’s, her Patronus changed into a wolf, in a way she became Lupin, who had always been on her mind.

“‘I am not being ridiculous,’ said Lupin steadily. ‘Tonks deserves somebody young and whole.’ ‘But she wants you,’ said Mr Weasley, with a small smile. ‘And after all, Remus, young and whole men do not necessarily remain so.’ He gestured sadly at his son, lying between them.” – There is something so genuine about both Fleur and Tonks expressing their love, showing that it is the person you fall in love with, not the body.

“And a new portrait had joined the ranks of the dead headmasters and headmistresses of Hogwarts … Dumbledore was slumbering in a golden frame over the desk, his half-moon spectacles perched upon his crooked nose, looking peaceful and untroubled.” – Does that happen automatically the moment a headmaster dies? I mean doesn’t anybody have to paint the picture first? Or maybe they do this beforehand and the portrait only becomes alive when the subject of it dies? Like it feels weird that on the one hand Dumbledore is gone and yet he is still in a way here, like Harry could wait for him to wake up and ask him for advice, no biggie.

“‘Harry,’ she said, ‘I would like to know what you and Professor Dumbledore were doing this evening when you left the school.’ ‘I can’t tell you that, Professor,’ said Harry. He had expected the question and had his answer ready. It had been here, in this very room, that Dumbledore had told him that he was to confide the contents of their lessons to nobody but Ron and Hermione.” – I think I wondered briefly why Dumbledore would be that secretively, that perhaps it would be better to find the remaining Horcruxes if for example Aurors would look for them, not three teenagers, who are not even fully educated yet. But I think the reason is that the less people are involved the less likely is the chance Voldemort knows what they are up to. Voldemort of course infiltrates the Ministry and perhaps he even had spies at the Order (apart from Snape). And obviously Harry and his friends are the last people Voldemort would suspect to have find out about his secret and who are off to destroy him. Vanity has always been one of his weaknesses.

“‘I want to talk about what happens to Hogwarts before he gets here,’ she said quickly. ‘Personally, I am not convinced that the school should reopen next year. The death of the Headmaster at the hands of one of our colleagues is a terrible stain upon Hogwarts’ history. It is horrible.’��� – We know that Hogwarts will reopen, though with a few changes. But if it hadn’t what would have happened to all the students? Would they have gone to a different school? Stayed at home? Hogwarts had always been a safe harbour, especially now that the Wizarding World is at war, but that promise of safety has always been linked to Dumbledore. And it is not just his death, but also the circumstances. That it was possible for Death Eaters to get in the school, that one of the teachers is seemingly one of them and then killed the headmaster, at school. The school has become a place of terror, it is no longer a home.

“And he knew, without knowing how he knew it, that the phoenix had gone, had left Hogwarts for good, just as Dumbledore had left the school, had left the world … had left Harry.” – Book 7 is so different in so many ways, because the death of Dumbledore really means the end of an era in every way. Hogwarts is no longer the place Harry can call home. He will never return, at least not as a student, because to him there can be no Hogwarts without Dumbledore. Dumbledore has always been the one to look up to, the one to ask for help, the one with all the answers. After Sirius Dumbledore was the last parental figure Harry had. With his death, with leaving Hogwarts, the last parts of Harry’s childhood are over. Symbolically he becomes of age at the start of book 7; he is legally and emotionally an adult now. No one to protect him, to guide him. He is his own man now.

[coffeecupandteatime]

Jagerbomb’s Mini Review #3!

Welcome to the glory of watching Jagerbomb lose his shit!

ʕಠᴥಠʔ Sorry for the wait everyone, I’ve been pretty busy. Also, if you guys know of any bad short fanfics, let me know! I’ll try to review those as well!

-rubs temples- This is going to sooooo enjoyable!

Note: I’ll do the first chapters for these types of reviews, mainly to save time and my sanity. Also, because finding the stories again is a pain in the ass.

 Harriet Potter leaves the Wizarding world behind, starting a new life in the Elemental Nations. Seeing how neglected little Naruto is, she takes him in and helps him out. UzumakiHarry! FemHarry! Slight Weasley/Hermione bashing! Possible parings with Itachi, Iruka, Genma, & Kakashi.

Female Harry?… Ooooooookay then!  ʕ.ᴥ.ʔ I can already tell I’m going to enjoy this.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Not Harry Potter, not Naruto, not anything else I might mention.

ʕಠᴥಠʔ Well, we can kinda tell you don’t own either, or else they would be shitfests.

Note: I have no Beta and edit everything myself, so if I made a mistake somewhere kindly point it out. I usually write on my phone and edit at 2am so I tend to miss things.

Hmm, well since you told us this beforehand, I can be a littler nicer.  ʕ0ᴥ0ʔ But mark my words, that doesn’t mean much with me.

Leaving the Wizarding World

And diving straight into the trashcan.

Harriet screamed and woke up a sweaty mess, the dreams were getting worse.

Like my need to drink right now.

Eerie morning light filtered through the ratty curtains and she flopped back onto the mattress in irritation. It was much earlier than she had intended to wake up but she was unable to fall asleep again, nightmares would do that to a person.

Wanna get some sleep, kid? Try chugging a bottle of Smirnoff, you’ll go right the fuck to sleep, trust the bear. ʕಠᴥ~ʔ

She sluggishly walked to the bathroom, shuddering at the coldness of the house, before turning on the tap and splashing her face with water.

Is the water hot? Warm? Cold? Why the hell is she splashing water on her face in a cold house?? ANSWER ME!  ʕಠ益ಠʔ

Checking herself out in the mirror, she felt a surge of triumph that she had finally taken corrective measures for her eyes. She no longer had to wear those hideous ill-fitting glasses that she grew up with, without them her emerald eyes shone brightly.

ʕ°ᴥ°ʔ Even though those round ass glasses are pretty important to Harry as a character. You suuuuure this is just a genderbend and NOT an OC?

Her aunt had always taken vindictive pleasure in making her look ugly. Harriet supposed she was taking on all the animosity her Aunt felt toward Lily. Harriet was starved for years, making sure she never measured up to her voluptuous perfect ten of a mother.

I don’t know there, Lily wasn’t exactly a ten… Or voluptuous...

Aunt Petunia also forced Harriet to keep her red tresses cropped short. The more it stuck up like an untidy boy's hair, the happier that vile woman had been. Due to her

Okay, why is her hair red instead of black? I get it’s female Harry, but with red hair it sounds more like his made up sister then Harry himself...

horrendous nest of hair and those vile glasses, her looks were often compared to James' instead of Lily's, even if she had her mother's coloring. Before leaving Hogwarts for the summer, Harriet would chop off her hair till it was as short as the beginning of the year. She had no choice, if the Dursley's had known she let her hair grow during the school year they would have beaten her savagely.

Whoa whoa whoa! Whoa! When the hell did the Dursley’s even fucking beat Harry? What the hell with people making the Dursley’s beat Harry and the village attack Naruto?! What the fuck people! ʕ╯ಠ益ಠʔ╯︵ ┻━┻

She learned to choose her battles carefully once she realized no one would be coming to save her.

-Deep breath slow exhale-.....I’m going to assume this author hates Ron and Hermione.

Harriet raised herself, she could live just fine on her own. She knew how to ration food and mange hunger, how to find a quick hiding place, how to keep secrets, and when to run away.

.,. You spelt manage wrong there buddy.

She learned early on to fear adults

Something no child should learn. Fuck oooooooff.

and had come to expect it, but it wasn't until she met Albus Dumbledore that she was exposed to ruthless manipulations.

Okay, been awhile since I read or watched HP, but why the hell is Albus always a manipulative CUCKOLD in these stories!? WHAT THE HELL!?!

Harriet shook off the feelings that came with letting herself dwell on the dead wizard, and shivered as she got dressed for the day. Today was important. Today she was finally going to do something about the gradual feelings she had been having. Ever since she had destroyed the horcrux in her scar, she no longer felt like she belonged in this world and it was an extremely troubling feeling.

This author has successfully said “Fuck canon!” \ʕ◕0◕ʔ/ WOO!

For the last five years, following the end of the wizarding war, Harriet Potter had been having dreams about the Veil of Death in the Department of Mysteries.

Didn’t you call them nightmares before? Also she’s been like this for FIVE YEARS and is just NOW doing something about it? Alright, pouring a drink.

Make Jager drink +1!

She could still remember the whispers that had called out to her the day Sirius had fallen through, they haunted her dreams. She would often wake up in the middle of the night in tears, her soul filled with a desperate longing to see the other side.

The other side of the Veil or of the bottle when it’s empty?

She knew it was some sort of gateway, the dreams told her that much.

Listen to your dreams kid! Even if they lead to certain death! \ʕ◕0◕ʔ/

The whispers in her dreams became clearer recently and talked about other worlds, new life, and a fresh start. Five years of the same dream and she'd finally given in, the voices had lured her in, and she was going through the veil to find peace.

I hope peace is where poorly genderbent *coughs*OCS*coughs* characters go when their unwanted.

She bitterly recalled the night she finally decided to finally act, it had been a couple months ago on her twenty-second birthday. Hermione, Ron, and Ginny had been visiting her for her birthday. Hermione, as usual, had been lecturing her about her lack of public appearances and was subtly trying to steer her towards going on a date with Percy Weasely, who was still a pompous ponce, when Ron apparently had enough.

Yep! Harry’s already genderbent, let’s throw in some OOCness for the others!

OOC Syndrome is wherever I go. ʕ;-;ʔ

"Look mate, it's not like you've much of a choice anyway. Dumbledore signed a marriage contract-

What in the ever living fuck in the bowels of hel-

Make Jager drink +1!

That’s 2! TWO!

-between you two while he was your magical guardian, so I reckon it's still binding. Percy's been waiting patiently for you, giving you time while he concentrated on his career. He'd hoped that by now you'd grow up a little and at least let him take you out." said Ron coldly.

Why do people INSIST on making Ron the biggest asshole alive?

Absolutely shocked over what she just heard-

You’re not the only one, hun. ʕಠᴥಠʔ

, it took Harriet a moment to compose herself while turning toward Ginny. "Is he serious? Your parents and Dumbledore secretly signed this marriage contract?"

Something's telling me it wasn’t a secret. Also what’s the reason for said marriage…?

"Not secretly," Ginny rolled her eyes. "Everyone knew about it. I thought you did too, why else did you never date anybody? Why do you think Order members always look at Percy and ask his opinion on matters concerning you? We never thought Dumbledore wouldn't tell you."

How the hell did she not hear about this? AUTHOR EXPLAIN!

"Right. Not a secret, but somehow I never got wind of it. It never came up...in the past twelve years?" Harriet said evenly, but the books on the shelves were beginning to shake.

TWELVE YEARS!? Was ‘Harriet’ living under a goddamn ROCK!?

They all looked slightly alarmed at that, and Hermione made the mistake of meeting her eyes. Harriet had become a fairly accomplished legilimens.

ʕ◕0◕ʔ The fuck is that? 

After her crap occlumency skills had gotten Sirius killed, she tried to hone the skill but was only mediocre at it.

For once the main character isn’t good at something that killed a relative.

Legilimency was where she shone, she was a natural at it and it was easy to become even greater than Snape. So when Hermione looked at her in alarm, Harriet saw everything.

Sooooo Legilimency is basically “LOOK INTO MY EYES CHILD AND TELL ME EVERYTHING!”? The hell is this, an anime?

She saw conniving whispers and conspiracy in the depths of her eyes. She had enough, Merlin's sake, Hermione knew, and she wasn't even a Weasley. They hadn't bothered to warn her, they were no friends of hers.

I get it’s magic, but how can you see all that with a simple glance in the eyes? ʕ-,-ʔ I’m calling laziness of Rowling's part.

Her green eyes hardened. "I'll speak to a Goblin about this situation, but you should know that a marriage is not happening. I'll see Percy dead before I risk my magic, and if I find anyone tampering with my future, I will end them. Now get out."

Again, this ‘Harriet’ shouts more ‘OC’ than ‘Genderbend”.

The lying trio eyed each other anxiously, they had seen glimpses of Harriet's ruthlessness during the war, but it was frightening to have it focused on them. Her usual friendly attitude had been replaced by an icy focus. Ginny warily nodded at Harriet and headed for the front door, Ron trailing after her, but Hermione hesitated. She reached toward the green eyed girl, but Harriet flinched away. Hermione sighed and said, "Harriet, don't make a mistake. You're practically a Weasley already, this would only make it legal. Besides, Percy is very responsible. You could use somebody like that, I can't always be there to-"

Annnnnnnd here’s the OOCness for Hermione.

Harriet wanted to rant at her when all at once, her anger left her, leaving her nothing but cold amusement.

So is this Harry or ‘Harriet’ or just  pure OOCness?

Hermione didn't know it but she had just give Harriet the sign she had been waiting for. She had been iffy on acting upon her dreams, but this was the final straw.

If you need more straws, I got some left over from a wicked party last-Oh, wrong kinda straw.  ʕ.,.ʔ Whoops.

"Always be there?" she answered mockingly. "You and Ron ditched me often enough. Luna was the one who was always there, till the very end. You and Ron abandoned me when I was hunting for horcruxes. I was alone, injured, wandless and-"

Yes, my child, let it all out.

Hermione puffed up like a toad,

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH! THAT LEGITIMATELY MADE ME LAUGH!

reminding her of Umbridge for one hilarious moment, before letting out an aggravated huff. "I thought you were over that!"

.,. How the hell is ANYONE gonna forget shit like that?

Make Jager drink +2

THAT’S FOUR! FOUR!!

In a soft, cold voice she whispered, "I will never 'get over that'. You were never there when it counted. You and Ron would take the first couple of steps with me, but always gave up when things got complicated. Hell, the only reason you two and Ginny stuck around for the Department of Mysteries fiasco was because you didn't want to get shown up by Luna and Neville."

I love Luna and Neville, <3

Hermione scowled, but didn't disagree. "You know," she said haughtily, "I don't know what's happened to you. If you don't get your act together and stop being so moody, you won't have any friends left."

Letting out a bitter laugh, the dark-haired

But earlier you said her hair was red….CONSISTANCY AUTHOR! LEARN IT!

girl stared at Hermione with grim finality and a touch of sadness. "My true friends died during the Final Battle, fighting for what they believed in. You're just a cheap replacement."

All my friends are deeead! All my friends a dead! 

Was that too soon? ʕ° ͟ل͜ ͡°ʔ

Finally done reminiscing, Harriet pulled her hair up in a high bun. Today she was leaving. She felt a tingle of excitement as she quickly dressed herself in inconspicuous clothes. She had planned and prepared for this, but knew that chance played a role in all her adventures. The odds were against her, but she had won against them before.

She was a independent black woman now.

Harriet had prepared nearly everything well in advance. She gazed speculatively at the vial of Felix Felicis that had been 'bought' from Draco Malfoy.

Don’t be a sex thing, don’t be stealing, don’t be some cheap friendship crap.

He had earned his potions mastery after the war and became a friend.

FUCK!  ʕಠ益ಠʔ

Draco had given her the liquid luck in exchange for Grimmauld Place, who he was going to gift to his mother. Draco and Daphne were about to become the richest family in Britain, she was leaving all her wealth to them as a surprise for being the only people she had left.

…..What. In. The. FUCK!?

 Make Jager drink +10!

FOURTEEN MOTHERFUCKER! FOURTEEN!

With a sense of awe, she opened the vial and drained the golden potion to the last drop, smiling triumphantly as she felt the magic flow through her.

So liquid luck. Is that like a drug or some kinda Irish brew? Cos I’ll take some!

The witch entered the atrium of the Ministry, making herself invisible with her handy dandy cloak.

“I got my handy dandy notebook!” Harriet said as a blue dog appears.

Harriet thought she would at least feel nostalgic as she looked about this world for the last time, but she felt nothing but desperation to get away. She detested her place in the wizarding community, where she was alternately hated and glorified on the whims of the sheeple.

Hated? Glorified I could understand, but hated? What did Harry/Whoever the fuck this is, do to deserve that.

When she approached the Veil that had swallowed up her godfather, she didn't feel the same heartbreak she had experienced in its presence before.

FEELINGS ARE FOR THE WEAK!

Instead she eyed the archway speculatively. What world was she going to go to?

The reader’s already know that answer, they had to rifle through fanfictions to find this thing. ʕಠᴥಠʔ

Did Sirius go to the same one? Did time run differently there, was she going to be able to see him? The possibilities were limitless. Or maybe she would die like everyone else thought happened? However, Harriet had always trusted her instincts, so she took a deep breath, and stepped through the Veil.

Lesson of the story kids: ALWAYS trust your instincts when they tell you to jump into a weird ass portal! FOR ADVENTURE!

Up next: Harry meets Death and an old friend!

Welp we’ll never know since I ain’t revisiting.

Question: What should Harry's name in Naruto be? When you review, drop a name and tell me why! I'm partial to Hikari (light) and Misaki (beautiful blossom)

ʕ.,.ʔ Wot.

Conclusion!

3.5/10 for trying.

Anyways! That was… Fuck, can’t remember the title, I made this file a long time ago, Uh. I should really start writing down the stories I review… Anyways, it wasn’t bad nor good, it was okay. I don’t see the reasoning for making Harry female and OOC, or the rest of the characters OOC, other than to have a reason for ‘her’ to go to the Naruto World.