#like she's working with what she's got. not her fault the only gay dude she knows is her brother

[francy-sketches]

I think margaery is a fujoshi

[cheesecakeingfriends]

Charlie stumbles upon a gay bar + doesn’t recognize Drag Queen!Pim at first

Charlie x Drag Queen Pim

Charlie started to go to gay bars when he was dating Zoey, actually. She enjoyed drag performers and though he was reluctant at first (a bit of internalized homophobia there) she insisted on the fact they were both bisexual so why not? (Charlie had never used that word, he just told her "I mean, everyone's kinda into guys" and she did the math for him)

After they break up (a mutual thing, kind of "hey, this isn't working, is it?" while cuddling on the couch and they're cool), Charlie keeps going to gay bars just to get drunk. At least that's what he tells himself.

Gays are cooler to be around when you drink, you see. It's... It's a science thing. Google it. No, he's not looking for a hookup, he's just here to drink. Really.

(Not that a lot of men approach him, anyway)

One night he walks into the bar and it's absolutely packed. A drag night, apparently. He even runs into Zoey who is already with a girl??? It's only been like two years, but go off, I guess. Good to know she could replace him so quickly. They're still cool, though. Just... Yeah, that's cool.

Anyway, the club is blasting Dolly Parton??? Curious. That isn't usually the type of music they'd play, even for a drag show.

He can barely see the performer but everyone is going crazy for her. She's small to the point she almost gets lost in the crowd and wearing a big blonde wig and a sparkly country outfit. It's adorable.

He kind of stares mesmerized for a while. And like, it's a normal reaction isn't it? He's never seen an audience go this insane over 9 to 5, so she's got to be pretty exceptional.

"Hey, isn't that Pim?" Zoey suddenly says.

At first Charlie laughs it off. Like, yeah, right, Pim doing drag at a gay bar. But then he looks closer... holy shit, that really is Pim. And Pim has seen him too, losing sense of the stage and falling off it.

Charlie thinks of getting to him, but he doesn't feel like doing the whole "what were you doing at a gay bar?" convo and some of the staff is already helping him, so it's probably alright.

That Monday at the office, he finds out Pim in fact broke his arm, oops

Both are awkward af, completely aware that the other recognized them and also what was that??? But Charlie feels the urge to apologize because yeah, that was probably his fault, he didn't mean to invade or anything.

Pim sits him down and explains that he's been doing drag for about three years? Apparently, he heard Charlie and Zoey gush (I mean, not gush, alpha males don't gush, but you get the point) over a really amazing performer, which made him curious. And next thing he knew he was doing it.

Charlie tells him he's very good and also can't help but comment that he thought he was straight.

Pim reassures him he's straight; he just loves the artform. Charlie says the same.

(Spoiler: they were not straight)

Charlie becomes Pim's biggest fan, he goes to all his performances and insists that he'll kick any dude who makes him uncomfortable's ass (he will most-likely not succeed, but he'll try). Pim finds it super endearing.

Then along comes Pim's gay awakening and he actually starts seeing a guy after his shows.

Charlie is so normal about it.

Of course they end up having a screaming "weren't you straight?"/"weren't *you* straight, Charlie? why do you care so much?" match at the break room.

(Allan hates gay people now.)

Let's just say Pim won't be seeing guys who aren't Charlie for much longer.

[artificial-transmutations]

Two sides of the same coin - Buddies

"Yoooo Pete!", Tom shouted across the whole gym floor. He had just spotted his workout partner and waved.

"Hey! What's up?", Peter called back from where he was working out.

Tom walked towards him, wearing only his red gym shorts, showing off his toned body. Both of them would qualify for the dictionary entry of "jock": Both were young men in their twenties who met over their obsession with working out, drinking and picking up girls. Tom was the larger one of them both and had medium length blonde dyed hair, while Peter was half a head shorter and not quite as bulky as Tom. Still, both of them had definitely bodies that turned a lot of heads - and they knew that well.

"Are you doing anything later?", Tom asked the other jock after they had said hello with a short hug. Emphasis was on short, of course, since neither of them wanted to come across as gay.

"I don't think so," replied Peter. "Why?"

"Care for a post-workout beer?" suggested Tom.

"Sure." Peter responded, "But we will have to earn that first!"

"Yeah, let's go work out some more then," agreed Tom enthusiastically.

The workout was long and intense, with Tom and Peter spotting for each other in tandem. Back in the locker room, as Peter was waiting for Tom to finish his shower - the gym showers were pretty small and there was a mutual understanding between them that they would absolutely not shower together, that was gay shit - he spotted something on the floor under a bench. Curious, he bent down and picked it up: It was an old coin that looked like a silver dollar or maybe even a quarter.

"Nice", he said to himself and pocketed the coin, not realizing it vanished once he put it in his pocket. Tom finished his shower quickly afterwards and they both headed for Tom's apartment. It was close to the gym and a good place to enjoy a beer.

As usual, when they entered the apartment, it was sparkly clean. Both buddies were neat-freaks, and it was way easier to bring home girls that way. Peter flopped down on the designer couch and looked expectantly at Tom. "You mentioned beer?"

"Yeah, sure," Tom answered, going into the kitchen and opening the fridge door. He pulled out two bottles of cold beer and handed one bottle to Peter. "Cheers!" They clinked their bottles and took a sip.

Peter liked this kind of beer very much: It wasn't too bitter but still full of flavor. "So how are things with your new neighbor?", he made casual conversation. "The hot one", he added for not-needed clarification.

Tom smiled. "She's nice," he said, taking another swig of his beer. "Aaand really hot. Did I mention she left her door open while changing last week when I came home? She didn't seem to care if anyone saw..."

"Wow!", exclaimed Peter in disbelief. "And you're telling me you haven't fucked her yet?"

"Well, no... But I'm planning to." He took another sip of his beer before going on: "I mean, have you looked at her boobs? Just the right size!"

Peter had felt horny since they exited the gym, and his buddies graphic description didn't make things better. He tried to casually readjust himself to hide his boner. "They're nice, yeah. But what about the ass?" He asked curiously.

Tom nodded, thinking about her tight little bubble butt. "Yeah, she has a great booty. And she's got a killer rack, too."

God, Peters cock was throbbing. What was wrong? A little dirty talk didn't usually excite him so much. He reached down to his groin to readjust himself again, shivering slightly as he touched his cock through his shorts. His friends' comments made him feel strangely aroused, almost as if he would get a hardon just from looking at her.

"What is it with you today?", Tom finally asked, noticing the change in his friend's demeanor before suddenly laughing. "Are you having a boner, dude?"

"Yeah," admitted Peter, feeling embarrassed by the sudden realization of his erection. "It's your fault, talking about that hot babe."

"So, you're saying", continued Tom, laughing, "I am giving you a stiff one? No homo, man!"

Peter laughed nervously and looked away, trying to hide his hard-on. "Shut up, dude!"

But it was no use. His cock was harder than it ever was, and it was aching to be touched. He looked at Tom. They didn't have that kind of relationship, but he *needed* to touch himself now. Excusing himself to the bathroom would be even more embarrassing. So, he just fished out his leaking rod out of his shorts and mumbled "God, sorry, I hope you don't mind." as he slowly began to stroke himself.

"Dude! What the fuck!? Are you jerking off?! Do that at home!" Tom shouted, shocked by what he saw. He couldn't believe his best friend was doing that in front of him. He wanted to say more, but there was something else catching his eye: On the right arm that Peter was using to jerk his cock, he could see some hair growing in. Just a light coating, but clearly visible. Usually, Peter was well groomed, just like himself. His left arm followed suit.

"Dude! You're getting hairy!" Tom exclaimed, even though that adjective was really far from true yet. Peter looked down on the arm Tom pointed at, without stopping his slow jerking. Tom was right, this coating of hair hadn't been there before. As he looked to his legs, he could see the same thing happening there. For some perverse reason, this only served to make him even more horny. He moaned, as another spurt of precum wetted his hand.

"Dude, are you okay? Why are you fucking jerking yourself off in front of me?" Tom asked concernedly. He felt bad for his friend who seemed to be getting turned on by his own body changes. A small diamond patch of dark hair had now appeared on his friends chest and he could see small bushes of hair growing in under his armpits. That was when Tom smelled it. The manly smell of musk and sweat, coming from Peter. His armpits were damp from sweat, as this new smell only turned him on even more.

"Oh God Tom, I'm so sorry, but... I... You...", With a defeated grunt, Peter grabbed his buddies head with his right hand and forced it between his legs, and over his cock.

At first, Tom was surprised, before he tried to resist. It was no use, however. Even though Tom was supposed the stronger one of them both, Peter had his hand firmly at the back of Toms head and pressed him into his groin. Peters cock, which was slick with pre rubbed against his mouth which he kept closed at all costs.

"Come on!" Peter whined, increasing the force even more. "I need someone to suck me off here."

"I'm not..." Tom began to answer, only to recognize his mistake right after. As he opened his mouth to answer, Peters cock was pushed inside. He could taste the salty flavor of Peter's precum on it and almost gagged. He wanted to byte, but somehow didn't find the strength for it. He let out a soft involuntary moan instead as Peter's cock slipped deeper into his throat until it hit his tonsils.

Meanwhile, Peter noticed a visible trail of black hair running across his previously hairless cobblestone abs. He felt really bad basically face-fucking his workout buddy, but he just couldn't restrain himself. He *needed* to bob his bros head up and down his cock with his strong paw. As more and more hair grew in on his belly, he felt his body filling up more and more. His muscles were joined by a substantial layer of fat, giving him a burlier look by the second. At the same time, his smell intensified further, filling up Toms apartment.

Meanwhile, Tom was undergoing a change of his own. Every passing second, he felt weaker and weaker, his body visibly shrinking in on itself. It didn't help that his nostrils were simultaneously attacked by the increasingly intense stink of Peter and his large pubic bush that was growing in either. He was being used, and he hated every second of it, but found himself powerless to do anything about it.

Where Peters stink reached the apartment, it began to change, subtly at first, then increasingly fast: The designer couch became a cheap red leather sofa. In the kitchen, dirty pans and plates were piling up, a patina of dust and grime covered the surfaces. It looked like a wardrobe exploded over the room, as dirty laundry scattered over the floor, adding to the stale and stinky air with the same aroma that Peter was emitting full force now. If anything, this only served to excite him more. While his left hand went through his beard and his dense pelt of body hair, he grabbed more and more of Toms shrinking body with his right hand and pressed it into his groin, not caring that it changed into a wooly cloth like material that had seen much, much better days already. It was ripped and ragged, stained by numerous stains of various sources. Mainly, of course, cum, but also pre, sweat and even the occasional bit of piss that had leaked into Toms fabric body.

The cum rag that was once Tom was fully aware of everything happening to it. It could still taste and smell, all across its filthy fabric body, and was forced to absorb another huge load of cum that Peter shot into it, even though it was still damp from the previous one.

Panting, Peter threw the used cum rag onto a pile of clothing on the floor. He didn't care that his hairy body was crusty with dried up cum or that he stank like a cave man. Taking a shower was not a concept the new Peter needed, he was a real man after all.

If you're a fan of the theme, check out my other two sides of the same coin stories!

[soft-cristobalite]

Watched arcane season 2 act 1, thought abt it, so here are some of my thoughts in no particular order. Obvious spoilers.

Also, i watched in dub. Important to know when i am quoting charaters + when i am talking about their tone.

Starting of with something that is directly affected by dub — ukrainian Jayce is my Jayce. Ppl said he sounded condesending while talking to Ekko — not. at. alllll. true for my Jayce. My Jayce sounded tired, emotionaly burn out. "You drink tea, Ekko?" said with no though to it, in a context of continues talking of "Haha do i live here? Hahah....... Do you guys want tea? Want some tea? I'll make tea. Do you drink tea, Ekko?". But d-dub is supposed to stay true to the original— I DONT CAREEE. I love my blorbo almost-himbo Jayce, never changing his characterisation in my mind.

And i will hold Jayce's hand when i say this — you were. Just so gay for like... Essentialy going "Are you okay? Good, good" to lady Mel Medarda HERSELF and then seeing Victor and losing your mind. Sprinting with him in your hands to your lab. LIVING in your lab to monitor him. I just... I get it, you don't have many friends. But like...... Really dude. Reaally.

Give Mel and Ekko thirty minutes. I promise you they would work it out. Eternal piece would be achieved.

I know there are a lot of different opinions regarding Caitlyn. I will not be explaining in-depts what i think about her acr, because a) who cares and b) i like to see her go cray-cray. But like — why isnt anybody exept for Vi attempting to stop her??? Like why is Jayce mourning Victor's twink death instead of, yk, stopping his childhood-best-friend-kinda-younger-sister from killing ppl of Zaun, the last thing Victor wants btw? She and Vi are twenty-ish — WHYYYY are they going through it by themselves??? Why doesnt baby yoda guy with German name that i dont dare to write trying to stop the daughtrer of his ex-collegue? He is 600 or something, im sure he could've come up with advice.

Cait pointing her gun at a child is terrifying, it opens up the possibilities of her going even more blinded with anger, doing even more horrific things, and Vi is right to try and stop her. However... I know damn right i would've believe her when she said she will not miss 😭 Every single time she fired her gun she was very precise. Even in that scene she aimed at the gun the girl was holding like two seconds ago and got a perfect. fucking. score. Like i dont remember her missing at all, actually.

"Ohhhhh you're gonnnaaa haaaaaattteeee Maddie after act two—" says who? On that note, i hope both Cait AND Vi will sleep with a few random people. Good for them. Let them try to forget about each other only to realise just how down bad they are for one another. Let the scenes of Cait and Maddie hooking up intertwine with Vi's one night stand.

"Maddie is just gonna be a victim of comander Cait :(((" and i do not have any thing to say to that — we dont yet KNOW what will happen — but I dont think Cait will try to manipulate her into this. I think Maddie will flirt a bit, Cait will try and seek salvage and vulnerability in someone, especially since she is now constantly in public's eye and needs to project hope™ and stoicism™. It will be a genuine attempt to move on — not anybody's fault she can't.

But oh god, oh goooddd i cant wait for Maddie to loose the spark in her eyes due to lesbian situationship.

[cheesysoup-arlo]

Cady’s Cousin (pt.1)

(pt. 2)/(pt. 3)/(pt. 4)

You’re cady’s cousin and you had to transfer to north shore senior year

Warnings: homophobia, use of slur (d-slur), violence?(idk) sexual harassment? (I’m not good at warnings I’m sorry)

A/N: before anyone is like “Aaron already graduated” I don’t think he did that poor boy got held back in my opinion you’re allowed to disagree also everyone’s gay SURPRISE these are all just my opinions feel free to disagree

You were hanging out with your cousin the Saturday before school was due to start and she said she invited some friends over when they arrived you were pleasantly surprised. Once you got settled and started chatting you joked “hey Cads I didn’t know you had cool friends, I thought you’d only knew math nerds like yourself, oh and I’m (Y/N) by the way” “oh right, this is my cousin, everyone say hi” the group says hi “ooo nice pants” you say to a girl with dyed green tips in her hair and the coolest pants you’ve ever seen “thanks, the name’s Janis by the way” she sticks out her hand for you to shake and you do “nice to me you” you say with a wink “ew stop being gay” the blonde one jokes “Regina shut up you literally have a girlfriend” Janis says lightly punching the blonde in the arm. “Is anyone in this group straight?” You say through a laugh “as of last week, nope” says a boy with brown hair who you honestly expected to be the token straight shaking his head “ah yes our baby gay, this is Aaron he just came out be patient with him” Regina says patting Aaron’s head. Two more girls and a boy show up “sorry we’re late Karen lost her phone” the more visual anxious and shorter of the two girls says “it was in the freezer” the boy says “oh who is this?” The boy asks genuinely curious “Cady’s cousin” Aaron says with a smile “can we like rapid fire everyone’s name and pronouns really quick for me” you ask getting a little confused. “I’ll go first even though you already know my name Cady, she/her” “Janis, they/she but honestly any I don’t really care” “Regina, she/her” “Damian, the badest/bitch no I’m just kidding he/him or they/them is cool” “Aaron, he/him? Those are the boy ones, right?” “yes Aaron good job” Janis says laughing and giving him a thumbs up “Karen, she/they? I think” “Gretchen, also she/they” Cady is happy to see that you seem to like her friends “what about you (Y/N)?” Regina asks “oh um (your pronouns) works” you say with an awkward thumbs up “so (y/n) where are you from and what brings you here?” Gretchen asks excited to know more about you “oh um I’m from Florida and I recently got suspended from my last school so my dad thought it would be a good idea to send me here to live with my aunt and Cady to “think about my highly irresponsible and destructive behavior” I honestly don’t think what I did was that big of a deal given the circumstances” you say kind of annoyed, the annoyance directed at your father “ooo what’d you do?” Janis asks suddenly more intrigued “oh I punched a dude in his face and lit his backpack on fire for harassing me but like it’s honestly not my fault if we think about it, I reported his behavior twice and told him if he didn’t leave me alone I’d punch him in the face and light his backpack on fire, He for some reason thought I was joking and when I was walking to lunch slapped my ass and said “give me a chance this dick can turn any dyke straight” then winked at me so I punched him and pulled out my lighter and whoosh fire” you said doing jazz hands when you said fire “that’s freakin awesome” Janis says enthusiastically and the group turns to look at her confused “oh um not the getting harassed part but like what you did was to that dude, that was like so tits” she explains “tits?” you say confused “i got this, “tits” is one of Janis’ fun little words she uses and it typically means awesome, really cool, or fuck yeah” Damian explains with a smile “tits” you say with a small chuckle “wait you’re from Florida? Have you ever seen an alligator?” Karen asks “yes I have they’re not as scary as people say” you respond “that’s like really cool” Karen says with a smile “oh my gosh your hair is like so fetch” Gretchen says after looking at you for a little bit “um thank you? I’m assuming that also means cool?” You say slowly and confused “yeah pretty much” Regina says patting Gretchen on the shoulder before she freaks out. Hanging out with them, you thought they were really cool so switching to a new school and state for your last year of high school might not suck as much as you thought .

A/N: guys I don’t know anything about Florida but it felt homophobic so I used it lmao also I think I’m gonna do this in parts I know I said Janis x cady’s cousin and I will give that to you but I want to know if you like it so far before I go hardcore into the story lol

[agaypanic]

Childhood friends to lovers with Francis Wilkerson x male reader 🙏🙏🙏

Francis thinking he’s straight until he and reader get older and he starts to question himself. They start to lose touch when Francis gets sent to military school, but when he comes back he sees reader and is like “…ok maybe I’m a little gay-“ maybe ends in fluffy kisses 🥹

Kissing The Homie (Francis Wilkerson X Male!Reader)

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Summary: Francis always thought he was straight. When he comes home from military school and sees his childhood friend for the first time in almost two years, he starts to learn some things about himself.

A/N: kind of unserious title bc i didn’t know what to title this lol also i feel like this sucks but i wanted to work on something

***

“What the hell do you mean you’re going to Alabama?” You asked your best friend, about to laugh. This must have been some insane joke. “Francis, you can’t be serious.”

“I wish I wasn’t, man.” He sighed, running a hand through his long hair and taking a drag of his cigarette. “My mom’s crazy.”

“Can you blame her? She’s got you as a son.” You snorted at your own jab, and Francis shoved your shoulder.

“It’s not funny, Y/n! I’m going to military school; I might as well die.”

“Don’t be so dramatic, Francis.” You snatched his cigarette to take a smoke. “You’ll get kicked out and be back here before you know it.”

“Yeah, I guess.” He murmured. The two of you were quiet for a minute, passing the cigarette back and forth. In a week, Francis was getting shipped off to a military school across the country, and although you joked about it, you didn’t know when you’d see him again, if at all. Sure, you’d been friends since you were five, but being states away with probably little contact could change that.

“I’ll miss you, man.” You said solemnly before smashing the lit cigarette against the bottom of your shoe. Francis laughed, shaking his head.

“Don’t be gay, dude.” Now it was your turn to push him.

“Shut up.”

***

Contact with Francis became less and less the more that time went on. It wasn’t really anyone’s fault; you two just became too busy with other things. You pulled away from Richie and Francis’ other friends, realizing that you only ever hung out with them because Francis hung out with them. Not wanting to end up in the same boat your friend was in, you started focusing more on school. You and Francis tried to keep up with each other, but sending letters felt too time-consuming, and Francis used most of his phone calls on his family or girlfriend of the week.

You’d sulk about it, but that’s just how life worked.

Because you and Francis were childhood friends, your parents were somewhat close with each other. So you weren’t surprised when you came home from school one day, and your mom told you she got Lois to get you a job at Lucky Aide. The only bright side was getting money, although it wasn’t much.

After what felt like forever, spring break had finally come. It didn’t feel like much of a difference to you since you still had to work, but it’s the thought that counts. You got to work fewer hours because Lucky Aide had some kind of program going on where a bunch of people could work and do inventory for the week. Craig was in charge of it, so you didn’t care much about it.

“Hey, I got another box for you.” A voice sounded behind you while you were stocking a shelf. It sounded a bit familiar, but then again, this was a small town.

“Thanks, man. Just put it next to the open one.” You turned around and were startled by the baby blue eyes looking at you. “Holy shit. Francis?”

“Y/n, hey!” Francis dropped the box and roped you into a hug, patting you on the back. You hugged him back, a bit shocked. “I didn’t know you worked at Lucky Aide.”

“Have been for a few months. I didn’t know you were back in town.”

“Just for spring break.”

“Nice, nice.” You nodded, looking him up and down. Military school seemed to do him some good. Not behavior-wise, he was probably still a menace. But you mentally thanked whoever made him cut his hair. Sure, the long hair looked cool. But it looked so good the way it was now, short but messy. And after almost two years, he seemed so much more mature. Again, not behaviorally. He looked, dare you say, kind of hot.

Wait, you shouldn’t be looking at your friend this way. You didn’t like guys.

Maybe.

Little did you know, Francis was looking at you the same way. He didn’t think anyone would look as good as you did in a Lucky Aide smock. You filled it out perfectly. And you had certainly grown a lot since he last saw you, almost reaching his height now with broader shoulders. But you still had the smart-ass smirk on your face that he loved to see.

But Francis wasn’t gay. Nuh-uh. He just knew how to appreciate another dude’s looks. Yeah, that’s it.

“Well, listen, man. I dunno when your shift is over, but I get off at five, so maybe tonight we could catch up or something.” You suggested, continuing your task of restocking the shelves behind you. Even though he probably had something to do, Francis helped you by handing you items from the box.

“Yeah, that sounds great. My mom’s being a real pain in the ass-”

“What else is new?”

“-so I’m a little desperate to get away from home.”

“Well, I have a car now, so just let me know when you’re free.” He was about to answer you when Craig appeared at the end of the aisle.

“Francis! What are you doing here? The bouncy balls are not gonna recount themselves.” You laughed while Francis rolled his eyes, clearly annoyed his peace was interrupted. 

“You better go.” You said, taking the final item from his hands. He sighed, briefly balling his hands into fists before letting them rest at his sides.

“Yeah, I guess. I’ll see you later.”

“See you later, man.” You patted his shoulder before pushing him away, watching him mope and drag his feet toward where Craig was waiting for him.

***

Instead of waiting until his shift ended, Francis snuck out behind you after you clocked out. He raised the collar of his jacket to cover his face as he ran out to your car, making you cackle as you fished around in your pocket for your keys. He practically dove into the passenger’s seat when the car was unlocked.

“Where do you wanna go?” You asked as you settled in the driver’s seat, turning the car on.

“As long as I’m out of the house and not at work, I literally don’t care.”

Half an hour later, you were tearing into a giant bag of fast food in a park’s parking lot. A random radio station played as you messily ate the cheap food. You reached down to the floor of your backseat and pulled out a bottle of cheap alcohol. Francis definitely wasn’t opposed when you offered to splash some in his soda cup.

“So, what’s military school like?” You asked, chewing through the last of the curly fries. Francis swallowed the bite of his burger and grinned over at you.

“Dude, it’s so much better than I thought it’d be. I mean, most of it sucks, but the amount of shit I’ve gotten into is crazy.”

“Such as?” Francis’ eyes lit up. Clearly, a story had popped into his head, but then he sunk into his seat as if it were embarrassing. “Oh man, this one’s gotta be good.”

“Okay, so it was sometime last year. A buddy of mine and I did community service for a local beauty pageant. It was perfect, half-naked women everywhere who would want some kind of attention. Of course, I showed interest in the pageant to get with one of them. But…” He trailed off, and you leaned toward him in your seat, silently egging him on. He looked away from you. “But instead, she and the rest of the girls thought I was gay.”

You couldn’t help but snort.

“Were they right?” You received an eye roll and a punch in the shoulder.

“Shut up, man.”

“Oh, come on! You can’t tell me all that and expect me to not ask questions.” You looked away and took a bite of your burger, confused by the slight disappointment you felt. It’s not like you really cared about the answer. “It’s no big deal if you are, bud.”

“And who said I am?” Francis’ voice was higher than it just was, like he was slightly panicked by the accusation.

“Those pageant girls, apparently.” You answered with a teasing grin. “Ever kissed a guy?”

“Gee, Y/n, no. Guess I never had the opportunity.” Francis sighed, taking a large sip of his spiked soda. You raised your eyebrows in surprise. Sure, it seemed believable while he lived in a military academy in Alabama. But, especially looking the way Francis does now, you’re hesitant to believe he never even had the offer.

Huh, maybe you did like guys. Or at least a guy.

“Do you want an opportunity?” The words left your mouth before you even thought about them, surprising you further. By the look on his face, Francis was just as surprised.

“What?” He managed to choke out. You shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant about the fact that you had just offered to kiss your childhood-turned-somewhat estranged best friend.

“Just saying, Francis. Better to kiss a friend than a stranger. Besides, who knows? You might like it.” You kept out the part that you were now secretly rooting for him to accept. You smirked at a now thoughtful Francis, trying to seem uncaring yet slightly intrigued by the whole matter.

A quiet Francis wasn’t a good one, which had you worried. You had half a mind to laugh, claiming that you were joking or that the cheap alcohol had taken your filter. But you were too deep now; you wanted to know what he’d say.

Francis licked his lips before turning to look at you, taking a deep exhale.

“Fuck it.” The craziest part was that he seemed completely serious.

Wordlessly, you both prepared yourselves. There seemed to be this unspoken agreement that whatever happened in your car would stay in your car until the both of you died. You took a final long sip of liquid courage before Francis took your face in his hands. You didn’t expect him to take charge of the situation, but you’re glad he did because the situation probably wouldn’t have happened if he hadn’t.

The kiss was quick but enough to absolutely boggle your mind. Francis slipped one of his hands to the back of your head to draw you in. His fingers became tangled with your hair, keeping you in place after he pulled away. The two of you were quiet with eyes closed, not knowing how to proceed.

“Am I a good kisser, Wilkerson?” You asked, trying to lighten the mood. Francis took the shy grin off your lips with another quick kiss, and when he pulled away, you opened your eyes this time. His baby blue eyes stared at you, filled with surprise and profoundness and what you wanted to say was lust.

“Okay…” Francis licked his lips again, taking a deep breath. God, it was so hot. “I think I might be a little gay.”

“Agreed.” You replied, staring back at him. He immediately went back in for a kiss that was longer and deeper than the previous ones. And you didn’t complain in the slightest.

[blushweddinggowns]

Steve was having a mild crisis. And its name was Eddie Munson. His new best friend, only second to Robin, the guy that Steve was sharing a bed with ten times out of ten. Steve never imagined that he’d ever end up this close to the dude who sold weed behind the gym, but here he was, absolutely obsessed. 

At first, it hadn’t even been his fault, how could he not be obsessed when Eddie was on life support for a week? When he had to go through hell to recover? Being planted at his bedside was only natural, especially since Steve was the one to save his life.

Then he got better, but Steve didn’t go anywhere. He was too attached by then, lost in the orbit of Eddie’s magnetic personality. He was hilarious, he was sweet, and he was a little weird. Besides the whole alternative look and nerd game obsessions, Eddie had some quirks. Like how he was obsessed with feeding the raccoons that lived behind the trailer park, or how he insisted on teaching Steve all about tarot cards, because, “If hell can live below Hawkins then these cards got a shot at being true.”

He was a little bit twitchy and fidgety, never fully able to keep still. He’d do little things without realizing it, fiddling with his rings while they walked, playing with Steve’s fingers when they lay together in bed, rapping his fingers against the wheel as he drove, he was always moving in some new way. Steve liked watching him do it, it was such a stark difference from those terrible days when he was still in a hospital bed, it helped to remind him that Eddie was here. He made it, he was safe. 

He was sensitive, and Steve had caught him tearing up more than once at a sappy movie or one of his insanely long fantasy novels. But he was unapologetic about it, always saying that bottling things up was for people who haven’t almost died. 

Steve didn’t mind any of it. In fact, he was kinda into it. He liked almost everything about the guy, and it was getting worse instead of better. The more time they spent together, the more Steve wanted it, craved it even. And Eddie was always more than happy to give him what he wanted and it was making Steve feel greedy. 

Because Steve wanted more. And he was pretty sure Eddie wanted more too. 

He knew what platonic love felt like, and whatever was going on between them wasn’t it. His heart didn’t start racing whenever Robin hugged him. He didn’t catch himself staring at her lips when she went on a rant. He wasn’t obsessed with her arms, or had daydreams about how those callused fingers would feel on his bare skin. 

He also didn’t fucking lose focus and start fantasizing about her hands when he thought about her. 

It wasn’t normal how he felt. It wasn’t even close to normal and Steve didn’t know how to feel about it. So he invited Robin over, because what else could he do? Talk to Eddie about his feelings and risk their friendship over his gay thoughts?

Yeah, no. 

She was barely through his front door when he blurted it out, “How did you know you were gay?”

She plopped down next to him, sitting on his feet with a cocked head. She didn’t ask for any clarification, or an explanation on why he would even ask that, she just launched into the answer, another thing Steve loved about her, “I’d say I figured it out around the third time I made out with my Farrah Fawcett poster.” 

Well that was…almost helpful, “So you didn’t know immediately?”

She narrowed her eyes at him, ignoring the question. “This is about Eddie, isn’t it?”

Steve groaned, staring up at the ceiling. Was it really that obvious?

“It’s pretty obvious,” Robin went on, like the weirdo could read his mind, “The two of you always look like you’re five seconds away from making out.”

“We’re not that bad.

She smirked, a small thing, “You’re right, you're worse.”

Steve kicked at her a little, but it only worked to make her laugh. 

“But I’m not…” Steve paused, struggling for the words,” Like that. Am I?” 

He didn’t think he was like that. It’s not like it was the first time he’d ever been close to a guy his age before, but none of his old friends or teammates had sparked anything in him. Eddie didn’t really spark anything either, more like…set him ablaze from the inside. In a way that no guy or girl ever had.

It felt like he had been smacked in the face with it completely out of nowhere. One day he’s hanging out with his best friend, laying on their bed while he waited for Eddie to get ready. He had just finished finding semi-clean clothes before turning his back to Steve. 

“I’m gonna change, so close your eyes,”

Steve hummed, stretching lazily out on the bed. He was in no hurry, they were just going on one of Eddie’s deals and he spent most of the time waiting in the passenger seat. Not the most exciting night. He let his eyes droop, but not all the way, silently tracking Eddie’s every move. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t closed them, but by the time Eddie had his shirt off he had his full attention. 

He had seen them before, admired them even, living proof that Eddie had made it. But this was the first time Steve wanted to kiss them. It was the first time his mouth went dry at the sight of Eddie’s back, admiring the muscles under the skin.

He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it since, and it happened a freaking month ago. 

Fuck, maybe he was gay.

Robin shrugged at him, “Having to ask if you like dudes is usually a sign that you like dudes.”

“But I don’t like dudes,” Steve whined, “I just want him. Doesn’t that count for something?”

Steve realized just how stupid that sounded the second the words left his mouth, but it was too late. Robin was already cackling, “Oh my god, you’re an Eddie-sexual!”

Steve kicked her a little harder, face red, “I am not!”

He absolutely was, but that didn’t mean he had to admit it. Robin wipes a tear from her eye, still grinning ear to ear, “If you want him so bad, why haven’t you done anything about it?”

Steve sighed, “Because what if he isn’t…like that?”

“But what if he is?”

“But what if he isn’t?”

Robin leaned in closer, her eyes going serious, “But what if he is? Steve, think about it for a second. Think about how he acts around you, are you telling me there’s nothing he does that shows he’s into you? Come on, dig deep.”

Steve pursed his lips, thinking. There were a few things that came to mind, “He…he likes to touch me a lot? I don’t know, it’s like little things, holding hands when we’re alone and stuff. Sometimes he’ll put his hand in my back pocket when we’re walking together, just to mess with me y’know?”

For a second Steve could swear he saw Robin’s eye twitch, “Go on.”

“And we um, kind of sleep together every night? And he’ll do this thing in bed where I’ll be against his chest right? And he’ll wrap his arms around me really tight and it feels so good and- Why are you looking at me like that?”

Robin stared at him, eyebrows up to her hairline, “Are you freaking kidding me right now?”

“What?”

“Steve, sweetie, that is beyond gay. That’s like…I don’t even know. The two of you are basically already dating, you realize that right?”

Steve could feel some hope building up in his chest, “You think?”

Robin scoffed. She looked like she was five seconds away from choking him, “Do I think? He gropes your ass while you walk and you’re seriously wondering if he’s interested? Babe, how did we get here? I know you're smarter than this.”

Steve laughed, confidence growing bigger by the second, “So you think I should do something?”

“If you don’t, I’ll be forced to kill you, I swear to God.”

Steve grinned. He sat up hugging Robin to his chest while she squealed at him to let go. He kissed the top of her hair, both of them giggling all the while, “I promise I’ll do something. God, what would I do without you?”

She smiled up at him, “You’d be a loser.”

Steve laughed, knowing that there was some truth in that statement. But it didn’t matter, his mind was made up. He didn’t know how he was gonna do it, but he was going to make that nerd his boyfriend by the end of the month.

An excerpt from an unfinished chapter of this fic

[boqvistsbabe]

Ok so fun gossip I heard

- 2 of the hockey boys had been secretly (nothing is actually a secret to me) dating for like 2 years but one is a science god who weightlifts competitively and plays 2/3 other sports very well and the other dropped out to smoke weed so they don't talk anymore and that is almost definitely the stoners fault and the nice really smart one is now stuck with a bunch of assholes because that was his only friend and he doesn't know that the queer femmes would adopt him to carry our bags

- there's a really popular girl who reads like Harry potter and colleen hoover (this is irrelevant I just like slander) exclusively who wants to be a radical politician but has never read any theory and don't follow politics

- the self appointed queen bee who cheated on her decent blonde bf by hooking up with her ex bffs abusive ex and then she left him for blondie and now has an on and off throuple with blondie and his besties, both of them are proclaimed straight and all of the are friends with shithead

- same queen bee and blondie, she posted on her til tok her rice purity score and it said that she had never come during sex, they were together for like 5 years and she has caught him watching porn while they fuck

- the annoying ass conservative dude who is like 6'6 and is the bad bitch lesbians man servant (he says friend but idk) started a fight with a known tiny 14 year old gang member and when a knife got pulled his mom, who works at the school, called the cops, same day a kid got stabbed in the head with a pencil during math but that was unrelated

- the grade 11 gymrat that my friends and I are fairy gay parenting into leftism at the start of the year believed that drug dealers deserve the death sentence (we are canadian???) and his ex gf's brother is in prison for petty drug crimes and his new gf is a scary bisexual weed dealer but I influenced him to be way better and they are a power couple

- all of the boys bathrooms are missing the soap dispenser and the mirrors, sinks and toilet seats are regularly stolen also once a custodian quit after having just walked into the main one

- we had a 3 hour secure school because a girl punched the librarian and the librarian passed out and then the girl hid somewhere in the school

- at a beach party during the summer my favourite random school person (you know what I mean, right?) was super drunk and shot a firework at the police, put his Crocs in sport mode and then ran away, successfully as well

- same dude had a job at an arcade and would break in during the night to just vibe with the lasers and run around drinking and smoking I guess, he also once hid from the cops in a tree, he postef all of this on his snap

I can't think of other big ones but this should do for now

Omg it’s been forever and a day since you sent this but I’m still gonna react to this lol

- okay first of all what a story second of all I feel bad for the one guy 😢

- okay but like that checks out based on the books soooo

- wild absolutely wild. First of all cheating is so bad but somehow who she cheated with made it even worse? Also throuple?!

- NOTHING IN FIVE YEARS?! WHAT IS BRO DOING WRONG (obvi everything but like omg) also while they fuck? 🫢

- man servant I love 💀💀 also hang member? ! And a pencil stabbing? That’s a lot on one day

- death sentence?! Omg?! Literally what? Also ur so slay for that tho

- it’s giving devious licks 💀😭 also that’s so real

- why did she punch the librarian 😭 like what

- (ik what u mean, i love my random people) AT?! Also putting the crocs in sport mode then running is such a funny picture

- this guy sounds like such a vibe tbh

[ran-orimoto]

I wanna know if possible: sexuality headcanons for the Uncle Frontier adults in your stories ? Izumi and Junpei are straight. The others? I want to know what they are like to the Kourantoto too. As uncles.

Hello, Anon! I don’t usually reply to these kinds of asks because I’m always afraid to be disrespectful about certain matters. Still, at the same time I don’t want to be rude and ignore an ask ahahha. So, I’ll try being very dry (a bit hard🤣q), but whatever….!

I’ll first talk about the sexualities!

• Takuya: Gay

I have been headcanoning he likes dudes since I watched the second Frontier episode and my thoughts intensified with the Tomoki’s nightmare episode. During these days I’ve been reminded writers didn’t keep themselves from giving both Takouji and Takunpei ✨ fantastic moments (yes, I ship both so hard, I’m not even sorry). They tried making him straight but they failed and it never worked before my eyes.

• Kouji: Bi

I believe he developed a preference over boys during the years, after having experimented dating girls (because in the drama it does sound like both him and Kouichi are popular among girls?). Like I’ve said many times, even if nowadays I ship Takunpei harder, I like headcanoning Kouji will get a little crush on Junpei in high school and it kinda lingers even after Kouji marries Takuya, then divorces him. Yet, Junpei only sees Kouji as a friend and also a brother at a certain extent, so…

• Tomoki: Ace

I used to see him as totally gay, but I frankly struggle to see Tomoki in any relationship somehow. Like, my most random ship ever is older Tomoki x Kouichi. It’s all due to some fanfictions really making it so nice to read about. Yet, I’ve landed on the ace territory for Tomoki, making him single and focused on his politician job like I think he would absolutely be.

• Kouichi: Het

Unlike Kouji, I headcanon him to absolutely prefer women over men, though. I’m not sure if he had a wife in my head before he died. Kouichi just gives me the vibes of someone who would get a perfect life as an adult, building his future very smoothly.

Yeah, maybe he definitely had a wife when he died.

-Switching to them as uncles (🤣🤣🤣 help me)

• Takuya is the cool uncle being a football star and making Kou get sparkles in his eyes. Kou wants to watch every football match featuring him and can get really sad whenever the teams Takuya is in lose. Takuya makes sure to send Kou lot of football gadgets whenever he can, from t-shirts to photos too, and I actually always draw Kou’s room to be full of football stuff. Not to forget Kou also plays football at school to be like Zio Takuya.

Still, I don’t think Takuya is the cool Uncle to Ran’s fantasies too. Ran can’t stand it when people treat Junpei badly, and let’s say Takuya and Junpei never lost their tendency to have intense brawls (now using italian swearing, why not🤣). Both have got their faults in the varied occasions, but Ran will always be convinced Papà has done nothing wrong and once she will also cry and shout at Takuya to leave Papà alone.

• Passing to Kouji, Ran is actually more affectionate to him than Kou, because Kou considers Kouji “lamer than Zio Takuya” , since he’s much calmer and isn’t that sociable at a first impact. Ran, instead, really loves listening to Kouji’s tales about his travels and Kouji will take a while to get used to her bursting curiousity. In truth, Kouji won’t find getting used to the kids that easy at first, despite having been a parent in the *cough* past (my Takouji having experiences🤣). He gets flustered at the kids being so excitable, so lively, so touchy, but Junpei and Izumi adore seeing Kouji melting a bit when it comes to them.

Junpei wants Kouji to understand they all are his family loving him despite him being such a free spirit. Kouji………….Kouji eventually gets attached to his uncle role in the depth of his heart. He just knows that if someone dares to touch the kids they will be doomed. Samurai Uncle🤣💕.

• Tomoki is kinda the too caring and fussy single uncle always coming up with pep-talks, and let’s say the kids aren’t that fond of that side of his, his baby homonymous, either. When Kou moves to Japan along with Izumi and Toto, Tomoki, who still lives there, starts visiting the family more often to get to know about how school is going for Kou. Since in his politician carreer he still deals with the issue of bully in Japan, he’s aware returnees have got no easy life. So, he wants to know everything about Kou’s new school experience, any detail, sometimes also instilling doubts in both Junpei’s and Izumi’s minds, making them wonder if Kou is really feeling that comfortable about the changes in his life.

When Kou gets involved with a circle of bullies, the kid gets so scared of the idea of just running into Tomoki. He knows what a calculating intelligence Uncle has got and it wouldn’t be nice, at all, if he got spotted pulling his pranks by him.

• Kouichi………… Kouichi dies of heart attack after having overworked himself during Covid period. He doesn’t get to know any kid, but Izumi and Junpei take the children to the cemetery sometimes, often telling them about their Kouichi uncle who has died as an unsung hero.

PSA: To me…Junpei could be bi, but the fact is that he has never got t explore his sexuality because of his crush on Izumi. For sure, he attracts both men and women XDDDDD.

[macgyvertape]

Vampire Chronicle Movies liveblog/thoughts

Before watching both these movies I had only seen the 2022 show and seen a few posts about the larger fandom. It was very interesting to watch both as part of my "watch any vampire movie a person recommends to me". My commentary on it got long enough I've split it into it's own post

Interview with the Vampire (movie)

Huh going from the show where Louis is a black man to the movie where Louis is a white slave plantation owner with a dead wife & child fundamentally makes him a different person and the framing of the story different. 

I know the 90s were a lot more limited in what they could show of gay romance but no church/wedding scene at all :( 

Lestat still has a great sense of fashion sense in this. I haven’t read the book and don’t know the lore but I’m surprised there’s no mind reading or telepathy in the movie

Was Louis the original confederate vampire where fans are like "he isn't racist look at him free those slaves that one time" and ignore everything else? 

I found the graphic violence in show IWTV crossed the threshold of making me uncomfortable a few times, but it was interesting to read that some audiences found the violence and gore in this movie uncomfortable when I didn’t blink twice.

Claudia in the movie being trapped forever at an even younger age is more horrifying. She can’t even cut her hair and have that bodily autonomy

I’m shocked at how quickly and easily Claudia goes from “we should kill Lestat” to following through and “succeeding”. 

Lestat returning only to be set on fire by Louis protecting Claudia, this is so different than the show, and they escape a lot earlier than WW2. 

The comedy of Santiago’s ceiling walk felt so out of place 

Oh wow there’s a full female nudity scene in the theater performance, I was expecting just a standard vampire movie topless scene

The vampires busting in was so overdramatic with the music. Funny to see the sun room and recognize it it from WWDITS. 

What a fucking brutal way for Claudia and that other woman to go, I think this scene as Louis is walled up is the horror element I found the strongest, because it's just so emotional

Good on Louis for killing all those vampires. Santiago tried the "teleport behind him" and it didn't work at all

This scene between Louis and Armand is SO CHARGED

I think it's interesting what movies Louis watches; Nostferatu, Gone with the wind?, Superman

Random helicopter but I was shocked how weak Lestat was and how Louis was numb enough to just leave him

"I want what you have" a very different Daniel Malloy

Lestat attacked Daniel?! Very on the nose music "I'm a man of wealth and taste" this was not how I expected the movie to end AT ALL

Thinking of this alongside other media that’s gotten a remake where people’s entry point is the newer adaptation, its hard not to watch this and compare it to the show version. Of course the show version has a longer runtime to explore the characters and could be explicit vs the 90s queercoding, so it feels like apples and oranges to compare the two but I prefer the show versions especially with Daniel Malloy. A friend who doesn’t watch vampire movies said this reminded her of “A League of their Own” for similar 90s movie that was queer coded vs modern show remake that is open about it.

Queen of the Damned:

My roommate after seeing the trailer: "Oh no early 2000s really got to them (derogatory)"

"[The world] sounded better" then it's extremely mid rock

Lestat's singing is awful. I cant tell if it's the actor's fault or the directing. (Looking it up: seems the front man for Korn did the singing)

There's a paranormal group that knows about vampires?! What’s their survival rate?

I thought Lestat killed his Maker (but Lestat is also a lying liar who lies). Marius looks incredibly generic like just some dude, I think it's the short hair and this movie's cheaper costumes. 

Its very funny trying to picture this B movie level plot happening with the tv show

It took half the movie for Akasha to appear then her dance scene feels very male gaze. Disappointed she never really got any characterization

I thought the weird flying bit was sex but it was just flying

All of Jesse's lines sound so stilted, is her whole thing she studies vampires so much she’s horny for them?

Oh hey its Disturbed “Down with the sickness” the best music in this movie (aside from the fiddle bit)  even with only 10 second of “Ooh, wah-ah-ah-ah”

All these vampires attacking him onstage, wouldn’t that also break the masquerade?

The fight choreography this whole movie has been laughable

The movie is more interesting headcanoning Lestat’s desperate call out to other vampires as a need for Louis to notice him and come back

The best thing this movie did was the number of times vampires stood in the shadows and had their eyes glowing before walking forward

Jesse’s bra strap poking out during this dramatic feeding scene kind of kills the vibe

Why is Akasha so into Lestat she could do better, and the fact she has like 3 full scenes despite being the titular character is really disappointing

Rating: better than Morb but worse than Twilight (I like alt rock)

[nicegaai]

Ch 2:

I’m backkkk<3 I have tea and (NOT BURNT!) rice and fried egg to eat, yay breakfast. Ok lets go

Oh I remember this intro paragraph. Lu and I had to reeeally wrassle w it to make it make any sense and uhhh I don’t remember concluding that bolding Emil’s name was the way to go. Wild. I should fix that later bc I kind of hate it now.

Actually I think I just gave up on this whole beginning bit. Like I just didn’t care enough to make it prettier than barebones. But u know what..even if its clumsy the vibes got across. i will not dwell on it more.

Hot topic t-shirt……. op u couldn’t be more specific than that? Its fine tho bc Emil is soooo cute. In my mind its maybe hmmm..an MCR shirt

Oh no. Hmm. Actually something is wrong for me for writing my trauma into this fic. by which I mean the “I’ve corrupted the younger people around me by being gay first and everything is my fault” stuff not the incest shit. fun fact I have cried about much of this in therapy, word for word. Im not going to pretend im better now, im just sexualizing it which is maybe a step up. Or maybe a bad sign.

Wowwwwwwww yeah this is stupid but im kind of living for it anyway. OP could have done better but its okay because she is my bestfriend and never did anything wrong ever

UGHHHHHH. Actually this whole chapter sucks and I have no sense of pacing. But what is IMPORTANT. Is that INFORMATION IS GETTING ACROSS. and things are moving forward. (Status effect wore off! You are no longer GOATED!)

FUCK , ING ., MY LIFE. There’s. TENSE CHANGES MID SENTENCE. WHO LET ME COOK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Ok goated again. The snap streak mention made me smile. Den/nor 4evrrr.. theyre so stupid and they would and AWUGHH. i was on some Den/nor crack cocaine when I was writing this wtf. im really feeling them, this is so cute. Its also so stupid. They’re so dumb. i hope I did them a fraction of the justice they deserve

I laughed really hard while writing the phone call with Berwald. The r slur was the highlight of the chapter for me. Theyre horrible obnoxious dubiously straight passing 20sm guys. They would call each other slurs for fun. Don’t @ me

ANOTHER TENSE MISTAKE. u can only imagine how bad this was pre-beta if a few things got by her filter… :-(

I did not realize I made Mads this stupid. Hmm. I kind of love him this way…….

LDKgJLKSGJLSKDJGLSJDGLSDJGLKSDJGSLKDGJKLSDGKLJSLJDKGLJKSDLJKGLKSDJLSDKLGKLJSDGLJKSLJKDGJLKSLKJDGKLS Goated again. Every mistake evens out with something so out of pocket it’s hilarious. Im the funniest person alive. my own dick is soooo suckable im removing my ribs as we speak

…. Why did I do this. Im putting my ribs back in. Why did I think this was a good idea. the flashback was strange..It went a weird direction. I don’t like it . I wanted wife jokes but I don know what this had to do with anything. … I can work with it tho. Emil is Ber’s special little baby boy isnt he……..

AGAIN WITH THE BOLDING! We love a stylistic experiment but this kind of didn’t go anywhere and didn’t stick in future chaps and is just ehchhchh I want to edit it out.

……..HMMM……….. I don’t know how I feel about the plot progression here. But at least it is progressing. It’s all so fast. But thats kind of why I think it’s funny. Theyre just that degenerate.

Ah speaking of degeneracy. I love you, deranged version of APH Norway I invented in my head. “Maybe Emil would call him brother if he asked…” yeah dude maybe :3 who knows :3

Wowww end of ch 2 <3  *checks time* JESUS IM TAKING LIKE AN HOUR PER CHAPTER? There’s 8 chapters and I have other things to do today!!! I gotta pick up speed a lil

im attempting my fic reread today. im announcing this bc i will be liveblogging to keep my morale up, NOT THAT anyone cares but i personally need this, like ill only commit to do the thing if theres an imaginary audience holding me accountable. & i like to have fun :3

anyway. captains log, its a beautiful sunny july weekend. i just finished my morning coffee, and, i am dreading this so much. i dont like rereading my own writing but i shall get over it. ok here we go.

Þetta Reddast vagueblogged directors commentary edition

Ch 1:

*opens fic and starts convulsing immediately* god i wish i smoked weed rn. i cannot chill out ever for the life of me

My Mission For Today Is: to remember what plot threads I’ve left hanging so I can resolve this story properly. And also try n remember where the flow is going. I have the end plotted out, I just am a little lost … it’s been a while :-(

------------

Abrupt beginning!!!! I’m not mad because I have . I HAD. Almost no writing experience when I started this. it isn’t ideal but I refuse to be one of those fanfic writers that starts rewriting early chapters without finishing the last ones. Ive never seen one of those types actually finish a longfic. …I’d already rather yap than actually read LMAO AHH

Oh this is worse than I remember. thats cool that s great ok alright *coughs up blood*

"20 somethings" WOW I really did not know where I was going with this when I started huh

LKJSDLKSJDLGKGDJSLDGJK ??? Who authorized this. Who let me cook. What the hell

I could write this better now. I could edit this into something beautiful. <- devil on my shoulder

FORGOT I WAS MAKING RICE BRB

"generously offered nothing to the exchange." wait STOPPPP. I’m so funny

GRAMMAR ERROR DETECTED why is there two periods. I’ll be coming back to fix that …………………. :-(((

Fuck. This is a lot. Marge Simpson Hiding Her Face dot Png

Oh this is stupid this is gayyy this is fukcinnn . Who fucking did t his. What was wrong with me,. This is so good actually. what was i ONNNN. 

Im gonna throw up and I don’t know if thats like/. A complimentary thing or if im just cringing that hard . Im feeling emotions. I love my OTPs..OT3~5? I love them so so much

Ok as much as im like “eww bad writing” this is .. dare I say, rly good in places. Not to suck my own dick but maybe all hope isnt lost and imposter syndrome is an illusion

Grammar mistake #2. Goddddddd. they should ban me from the archive for this

EMILLLLL EMIL EMIL EMIL HIIIIII BABYYYY EMILLL I LOVE UUUU AWWHUUGHH everyone clap for my bewoved baby bruvver right FUCKING now

Urghhh gritting my teeth… Im fully expecting the flow of events to start not making any gd sense. There’s no way this came together the way I hoped in my head and .... For real I was never able to read this all the way thru. this is my first time, lol. and it was all disjointed on the authorial end to say the least. Im scared T-T

Jlxjvklsdkjfsjlkdkjlsjklkljzsdkjlgaskljdgjklasljkgdljkasljkdgjklasjlkdgljkaskljdgjakl?????????? 

Im not liking the ratio of dialogue to whatever the other stuff is. scene-setting I guess. prose maybe. i could have dragged this out way longer... By which I mean made it a more satisfying read. But WHATEVER !!!! 

TIMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIMOOOOOOOOOO NUMERO UNOOOO DO MUNDOOOOOO I really need to utilize him more. As soon as I finish this fic I need to write a Timo POV spinoff where he gets cancelled on furry twitter for proshipping in real life

Hmmmm chapter ending didn’t hit as hard in practice as it did in drafts. Oh well. God damn that was a lot to happen in one chapter LMAOO???

OH SHIT MY RICE IS STILL COOKING —— 

[silvyavan]

OK I read the chapter and I finally realised why I can't Lucius seriously.

This man is giving eldest sibling syndrome, chuunibiyo and airfried energy so hard.

Like, all things considered, I don't think the majority of twitter really sets in that Lucius, even if he is the last baddie, is still the fuckhead that raised the Zogratis sibs.

This man is the reason Dante, Vanica and Zenon turned out like that and it SHOWS. (Under the cut cause I ain't making you read me dragging these 4 bitches to dirt)

Dante is the definition of narcissism, a man who thinks he's better than everyone but refuses to work for that title. He has the emotional intelligence of both a 50 year old boomer and a spoiled edgy 12 year old and it changes like a metronome. Even Lucifero dipped his ass. He's a misogynistic fuckwad with little to no mental development. This fucker absolutely copy pasted this shit from Lucius "I am The Chosen One" Zogratis.

Vanica. Look at her. This milf chasing trauma machine runs solely on the desire to fight because she's very much socially undeveloped and doesn't believe in familial love. Bitch couldn't understand why Acier wanted to protect her family and it took Noelle beating her ass halfway to death to even grasp the concept of friendship and it missed the shot so hard. Her healthiest relationship is with Megicula and that's an insult to Lucius' parenting methods.

Zenon. Zenon Gay Disaster Projection Zogratis. Where do I even begin with the most mentally incapacitated youngest child? This dude almost, ALMOST got out of the toxic family clutches and could have eloped with his childhood sweetheart Allen but Lucius (im pretty sure the dungeon incident was his fault, you can't tell me it aint) got so fuck ass mad over Allen "steering Zenon away from what he's supposed to be" that he sent out a hit on him to get Zenon to crawl back so traumatised he literally copy pasted the Lucius Manifesto into his head and went on a depression episode that lasted 15 years. Man self projected his self blame, flaws and everything he hated about himself onto Yuno because he saw the Parallels. Man sold his SOUL to Beelzebub for a cornchip victory that never came.

You telling me these three are the pinnacle of plotting? For all I can tell, Lucius sacrificed all of his sibling for whatever agenda he had and the minute something goes even a millimeter off the prophecy, he immediately tries to kill it instead of working around it.

Man is so hellbent on forcing his chosen one timeline he has no fucking long term planning skills. This man started a fight with Asta in front of two royals, a 500 year old sealing mage and all of whom know how to use Ultimate Magic. Mimosa is Literally the Senzu Bean of Black Clover. Noelle has killed MULTIPLE demons. Secre can banish Lucius' ass faster than he can ask what's going on. This is not the plan of the century, ESPECIALLY if he started this shit in the Royal Palace where MULTIPLE high ranking and strong mages reside.

You look at this man and tell me he ain't a deep fried chuuni who fell into a white supremacist reddit forum and got a 5 year plan that is a botched 20 year plan involving mass genocide. I don't believe it.

Man probably even made up Julius entire identity around his own self and then got shocked when said second soul then doesn't wanna listen to him.

I ain't even mad about Tabata making the 4th Zogratis Julius Sibling theory cannon now because the way it comes off, the only true way to stop the 3 Demonic Musketeers Of Apocalypse is to defeat their weirder, more unstable and bigoted eldest sibling who raised them into those disasters.

At this point, the only thing that could make this EVEN FUNNIER is if Lucius didn't account for the possibility of "eating a supreme devil's malice fueled heart immediately purifies them and reincarnates them as humans", which is to say Asta could be Astaroth's Unbothered, Moisturized, Happy, In My Lane, Focused, Flourishing Human Version and Asta simply talking is giving Lucius an aneurysm.

[rabbiteclair]

oh yeah, I've had this post in my drafts for years, but I always held off on publishing it because it was like 'god what kind of mutant discourse is gonna develop in the notes if this gets lots of reblogs?' but now I can just make it unrebloggable

as a warning a comprehensive list of all the triggers and stuff covered here would be about half as long as the post itself. in general, maybe steer clear if you're sensitive to anything around violence, sexual assault, substance abuse, or cops doing shitty cop things.

an attempt to catalogue every regular around the carryout where I used to work, before my memory craps out entirely:

The Harley-Davidson guy: Owned a Harley-Davidson, which he spent about 12 hours a day riding. Mostly on this list because at one point he missed some payments and his heroin dealer sent somebody to steal it, and his response was to load a bunch of guys with bats into a truck and drive around busting sheds open looking for it, culminating in a baseball bat street fight in the middle of some hillbilly village with like 90 residents. Afterward they came back covered in blood and hung out recounting the story to us.

The lottery goblin: An old lady who spent about $50 a day on lottery tickets. She had a giant, complex system that dictated what she played on any given day. Whenever she bought scratch-offs, she’d ask a dozen questions to figure out if they were acceptable. (What’s the serial number on the back end with? How many are left on the roll? Is that the first roll you got of them, or have you sold a few already?) Had inch-long fingernails caked in scratch-off ticket residue. ... somehow, she seemed to turn a profit off the lottery, so I guess I can’t fault her methodology much.

The editor of the town newspaper: A functioning alcoholic, with emphasis on both words. She was homeless and said it was because houses were too much work; as far as I could tell this was true because she probably made more than 80% of people in town. In the summer she slept on benches along the hiking trails, and in the cooler seasons she lived out of her car. Smart as hell and fun to talk to--she’d come in and hang out for a few hours at a time occasionally, and we used to still chat on Facebook now and then up until I finally deleted my account.

Cool gay guy #1: He had some kind of horrible disease and needed to be on heavy painkillers basically 24/7 to manage it. As a result, he was terminally stoned out of his mind and practically radiated happiness. Every time he came in everybody would run out to give him hugs, because this all made him the friendliest dude on Earth. Hope he’s doing okay.

Cool gay guy #2: Ran a trucker diner just outside of town. Super-friendly and chatty. Would come in sometimes and trade his stories about horrible trucker customers for our stories about horrible lottery customers.

The town alcoholic: Keep in mind that basically everybody on this list so far was some degree of alcoholic, but this guy was the one who made everybody else go ‘whoa, that guy has problems.’ Bought two forties of King Cobra every day, and got his friends to help keep him drunk the rest of the time. A wildcard--during his visits, there was about a 50% chance he’d throw up on everything, and about a 50% chance that he’d take out the trash or something in exchange for some change. We got along pretty well, so I was usually in charge of coaxing him out of the store if things were closer to the ‘throw up everywhere’ end of the spectrum. He still projectile vomited directly onto my shirt once.

The less lucky town alcoholic: Like the previous guy, but less friendly and preferred a 20-pack of Natty Light every day. Had two teenagers who just hung out and drank with him all the time. About six years in, he went swimming and decided to dive off of a bridge into the river. The river was about two feet deep there, and he did not survive.

Shitty cop: There were a few cops and they all sucked, but this is the only one I remember. A bit of a smarmy jerk. Kept trying to blackmail one of the cashiers into fucking him on the grounds of, “I know you smoke weed constantly and haven’t arrested you yet, so why don’t you do me a favor in return?” On multiple occasions he’d come in complaining like ‘god they have us running everywhere trying to find out who did Crime X’ when The Guy Who Did Crime X was a customer who had come in an hour earlier telling us about Crime X, and we were always just like ‘damn dude that’s wild, wonder if you’ll ever catch him.’ The aforementioned baseball bat fight was one of these incidents.

Shitty prison guard: Came in every night after his shift to buy cigarettes before he went home. Hung around and chatted sometimes. A disconcerting number of his stories boiled down to “yeah, so today this prisoner stepped out of line, and haha, we kicked his ass really hard.” In retrospect I should’ve tried finding the right authority to report this shit to, but hell if the town cops would’ve cared.

The town weed dealer: A pretty chill guy. Literally everybody in town knew about him, so he was pretty popular with the customers and staff. One time the cops arrested him and took him back to his house to search the place, and he offered to unlock the door but they were all “no we’re doing this like a cool raid” and busted it down. He ended up suing the police department for the resulting damage and won. Because of this kind of incompetence and wildly illegal behavior from the cops, he never got arrested for more than a few days before a judge threw all the charges out.

Grumpy old guy #1: Ran a tree-trimming business. Came in every night and bought half a pound of cheddar and a bottle of vodka, which was his dinner as far as I could tell. Smoked like two packs of Lucky Strikes a day, so I'm not sure how he was still alive.

Grumpy old guy #2: Came in daily and scowled at our every attempt to get him to warm up, so one of my coworkers made it her mission to get him to smile. Finally, after months of this, he got a bit more open and friendly with us, until he started bringing us ice cream and stuff. This is around the point that the assistant manager pulled us aside and showed us the dude’s decades-long record of convictions for domestic violence and sexual assault; we did not eat his ice cream past that point. On one of the first days I worked there, the main road through town was shut down for hours because somebody got into a hostage situation with the cops. This was the guy.

Less grumpy old guy: Was the trustee of the township or some vague elected position like that. Came in every morning and chatted for a bit while he had his coffee and read the paper. Had long, grave conversations with people about The Future Of The Democratic Party and his place in it as a township manager.

Twenty-something ne’er-do-well: Had basically zero redeeming properties that I could find. Constantly bragging that he’d knocked up six different girls and then ghosted them. Picked fights in the parking lot. Probably the person who once beat the assistant manager over the head with a brick and ran off with like $100 in loose change. Once tried shoplifting a bottle of whiskey, and when confronted about it, switched to the defensive tactic of ‘actually that whiskey was in my underwear when I came in.’ One time I bought an almost-definitely-stolen VHS of Silence of the Lambs from him, which I probably should not have done, but it was the only way to get him to go away.

Juggalo with cancer: A twenty-something guy who had some kind of slow-burn cancer. He came in occasionally to hang out; when he did, there was a 50% chance he’d talk about comic books the whole time, and a 50% chance that he’d spend the whole time talking about how juggalos were the most discriminated-against minority in the country.

[drarrily-we-row-along]

Day 66: Bond

There was a certain bond that formed between two people when all of your friends were paired off and dating someone. When the two of you were the only single people so you got paired off to share food, and be partners in games, and all other manner of things.

Harry supposed that tonight would be just one more of those nights as he arrived at Ginny and Luna's. And he wasn't complaining (not anymore, at least) it had taken a couple of years but he and Draco had warmed up to each other. They had compatible styles for partner games, Draco always gave Harry any treats with nuts and Harry gave him any treats with mint, and Harry genuinely enjoyed his dry sense of humor.

If he was being honest, he'd started looking forward to all of the time that he got to spend with Draco on Friday nights.

But things felt different the moment he entered the house, even though he couldn't quite put his finger on why. He spotted Ginny first, standing against the counter, pouring a couple glasses of wine, "Hey," he called.

She looked up and bit her lip.

"What?" he asked with no small amount of dread. He knew that look; it was the look she'd given him right before she'd told him she might be gay and in love with Luna, a look that said she was afraid of breaking his heart.

Ginny opened her mouth but no words came out.

"Ginny, what?" he said, taking several steps toward her.

"I don't know how to say thi-"

"Oh, good," he heard Draco say from behind him, "You're here."

His mouth stretched into a grin even before he turned around "He-" he broke off when he saw that Draco was standing with his arm around some bloke who Harry had never met before. "Hey," he finished.

"This is Matt," Draco offered.

And frankly, Harry would rather die (again) than shake his hand but before he could have any say in the matter Matt had stepped forward into his space and was gripping his hand. Hard. "The Harry Potter," he drawled. "My, my."

(Read more below the cut)

Harry glanced over at Draco who looked vaguely uncomfortable.

"Draco has told me so much about you. I could hardly believe that he was telling the truth." He leaned toward Harry conspiratorially, "He's known for embellishing the truth, you know?"

Harry wrenched his hand from Matt's grip, "Actually, I've found Draco to be honest to a fault. Hardly anyone else will tell me when my outfit doesn't match or I've got something stuck in my teeth."

Matt's eyes flashed and Harry's proverbial hackles stood on end he didn't like that look, "I-" Matt started

"Hey," Draco said, taking Matt's hand and drawing his attention, "Let me introduce you to everyone else."

"Nice meeting you, Mark," Harry called.

Draco narrowed his eyes at him, "Matt," he corrected, before mouthing, 'behave' at Harry.

"My mistake," Harry said, maintaining eye contact with the other man until he turned away and followed Draco into the other room.

"Okay," Ginny said, drawing his attention away from them, "First. Men are disgusting; I can't believe I thought I was attracted to them for so long."

"What?" he asked, slumping over to the counter and sliding onto a stool across from where Ginny was still mixing up drinks. He was feeling a little nauseous, fire rushing under his skin.

"That," she said, gesturing to where Harry had been standing talking to Matt and Draco, "The little pissing match to decide who's dominant."

"What?" Harry asked, "that guy is just an asshole."

She rolled her eyes, "Second, you're still an idiot."

"Wow. I'm just going to go home," he said. "Between you and the dude who was trying to break my fingers, I don't think it's going to be a great night."

Ginny leaned across the counter and instinctively Harry leaned toward her, "How long are you going to continue denying you have feelings for Draco?"

His brow furrowed, "I don't. We're just mates," he added.

"I rest my case. You're still an idiot," she said as she leaned back and started mixing drinks again.

Harry slouched on his stool turning that thought over in his mind, "That actually would make sense," he admitted.

"Harry, I love you, you know I do," she said. "But honestly, I can't believe you're just figuring this out. The rest of us have known for ages. We were all shocked when he walked through the door with Matt; he told us he was bringing someone but we thought the two of you were just making a joke."

"Well now what am I supposed to do?" he asked. "Why couldn't anyone have said something sooner?"

"Because we thought it was obvious," she hissed.

"Let's just get through the night," he sighed. "Then we'll deal with the rest. We'll need to come up with a plan."

-----------

He spent the rest of the night calling Matt the wrong name (Miles, Maurice, Mike, Max, Moses, Mitch, Mason) to the point that Ron either caught on and decided to help or got confused enough that he started calling him the wrong name, too. Harry also couldn't help but rub it in Matt's face how much better he knew Draco; telling inside jokes, asking Draco specific questions about his work and his parents, and reminiscing about fond memories.

Draco seemed a bit exasperated by it but Harry couldn't help himself. Once he started, he just couldn't seem to stop.

Eventually as everyone was getting ready to leave and Luna was saying good bye to Matt, Draco cornered him, "Do not move a fucking muscle," he hissed, "I am not done with you."

"Dra-"

"I mean it, Potter. Stay right here," he said, jabbing him in the chest with his finger before he turned and made his way over to his date.

"Hey," Matt said, smiling at him much the way Harry imagined an alligator might smile at his prey.

"Hi," Draco replied softly. "I'll floo you tomorrow, yeah? There are a few things I need to take care of."

Matt frowned, "I thought we were going back to my place."

"No," Draco replied steadily. "I have a five date rule." He stepped back, "I'll floo you," he repeated.

And Matt looked pretty pissed about it, but he seemed to take the hint and disapparated on the spot without so much as a goodbye to anyone.

"You're all the literal worst," Draco fumed. "Except you, Luna," he added. "You're a goddess."

Luna gave a little curtsy.

"Seriously," Draco said, glaring at the room even though none of them looked especially repentant. "And you," he spat, spinning to glare at Harry, "You're the worst of all."

"Does that make me special?" Harry quipped, arms folded across his chest.

Draco groaned, "Bloody fucking Griffyndors. I hope you're all happy," he grabbed Harry's arm. "Come on we are going back to mine to have a chat."

"I thought you had a five date rule," Ginny called.

Draco flipped her the two finger salute before apparating them to his house.

Harry always liked being in Draco's house; it was small and cozy, and it always smelled vaguely like chamomile. Just being here made his soul feel lighter, calmer.

"Alright," Draco growled, "Spill. What the hell was that?"

"What?" Harry asked innocently.

"Potter," he warned.

Harry sighed, "He's an asshole."

"And you know that how? You didn't even give him a chance".

"Draco his handshake was like a vice!"

Draco stared at him, "You've got to be kidding me. Are you that much of a child? He hurt your hand so you thought you should bully him?"

"I didn't bully him!" Harry exclaimed.

"No?" Draco asked. "You didn't use his given name even once." Harry winced, maybe that was overkill. "You spent the entire night trying to make him feel stupid and inferior to you. Which, let's face it, everyone does anyway because you're Harry fucking Potter!" Draco exploded.

"That's not fair," Harry said, betrayal slicing hot through his gut. Draco knew that he hated being famous, hated the preconceived notions attached to his name.

"Yeah well, neither was what you did."

"Draco, I-"

"No," he said, holding out a hand, "That was such bullshit, Harry."

"But he's awful."

"You didn't even give him a cha-"

"I didn't have to!" he exploded. "The first words he said to me were to disrespect you. He's an asshole and I will chase a million of them away from you."

"That's not your job."

Harry threw his hands up in the air, "I'm your best friend! Whose job is it, if it's not mine?"

"You don't just get to decide things for me!" Draco cried.

"Fine," Harry spat. "You want to date that wanker, go ahead. But I have seen his type before. Don't come crying to me when he's beaten you to a bloody pulp for looking at someone the wrong way." He pushed past Draco and made his way to the door, walking out and slamming it behind him.

He started down the sidewalk, debating trying to figure out where Matt lived and have a chat or maybe go over to Ron and Hermione's to get some advice and regroup.

But the further he walked, the more the anger faded from his veins, and the guilt settled in.

There was no choice really, he turned around and headed back to Draco's house once more. When he arrived he knocked on the door even though he normally would have just let himself in.

"Go away!" Draco shouted.

He knocked again, "Draco, please."

"No! Go away. You're the worst."

"I know," he called back. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. Please."

After a few seconds, during which fear settled heaving in Harry's gut, the door opened and Harry slipped inside, Draco was curled up on the couch, hugging a pillow to his chest.

Seeing him looking so small and sad made Harry ache. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I shouldn't have said that."

"Which part?" Draco asked bitterly.

He sighed and came over to sit on the couch beside Draco, "I'm not sorry for chasing him away. But I will always be here for you, no matter what. You can always come to me."

Draco leaned over and put his head on Harry's shoulder, "I know," he whispered.

"Forgive me?"

He nodded and they sat together in silence for a few minutes, both trying to collect their thoughts. Eventually Harry said, "I really wish you wouldn't date him."

Draco sat up, "Harry look at me."

Harry turned on the couch to look at him and raised his eyebrows.

"I won't ever floo call him, we'll never go on another date, and I'll never see him again." Something eased in Harry's chest. "But it's not because of what you said or did. It's because I, too, have had shitty relationships. I have also lived through trauma and I have had to learn from it just like you."

Harry looked down at his hands.

"And if you have concerns about someone, there is a better way to tell me than what you did tonight."

He nodded, suitably chastised, "You're right."

"I appreciate your concern, though," he added and Harry looked up to see that Draco's mouth was quirked up, he really must be forgiven, apparently. "And I genuinely forgot how petty you can be."

He shook his head and reached out for Draco's hand, "Draco, I want you to be so, so happy," he said. Then he added, "I'm an idiot."

Draco raised an eyebrow.

"And everyone knows it, you included, so you can't really hold it against me," he said.

"I'm pretty sure I can."

He huffed, "Just hear me out. I'm an idiot and I didn't realize until tonight that I'm a little bit in love with you. And it's fine if you don't feel the same but you are my best friend and I had high standards for you even before I knew I had feelings for you. It hurt me to see you with someone who treated you so poorly."

"Sorry," Draco said, "I need you to repeat that."

"I said, I'm an idiot," Harry started.

"Not that part."

"It hurt me to see you with someone who treated y-"

"Not that part either," Draco said.

Harry swallowed, "It's fine if you don't fee-"

"Harry," he grumbled. "Say the other part."

He rubbed the back of his neck, "I'm in love with you," he whispered.

Draco blinked at him, a smile blooming at the corner of his mouth, "Say it again."

A grin tipped up the corners of his mouth as well, "I'm in love with you."

Draco launched himself into Harry's arms and covered Harry's lips with his own, "say it again," he mumbled into the kiss.

"I love you," Harry repeated, murmuring the words into Draco's mouth.

Draco pulled back slightly, "I love you, too."

"I hoped that was the case," Harry replied.

After he kissed him again, Draco said, "Alright, fine. Now you get a say in who I date."

Harry grinned, "Is that so?"

He nodded.

"Will you date me, Draco Malfoy?" he asked, brushing his nose along Draco's.

"Yes," he whispered. Then with a smirk he added, "But we'll have to get my best friend's approval and rumor has it that he has very high standards."

---------------

Day 65: Question | Day 67: Soulmate (Take 1)- Your traditional soulmate trope or Day 67: Soulmate (Take 2)- just using the word 'soulmate' as a prompt, not the trope.

[joyandthephantoms]

if love’s elastic, then were we born to test its reach?

2k, T, Flynn & Luke

Warnings: discussions of homophobia, swearing

Summary: Flynn and Luke sit in a car and talk about their moms.

ao3 link

It's not an official rule, it's not on purpose, and honestly, it's not very convenient, but Flynn is the only person capable of calling the weekly Julie and the Phantoms band meetings to order. The others try, sometimes, but no one else's efforts to curb the giggles and social time and say, "hey, okay, we have work to do" ever seem to have much effect.

Today, Flynn kicks it off by bursting through the door, announcing, “I’m going to kill my mother,” and then plunking herself down on the couch next to Julie and reaching for the calendar on the table.

“You good?” Reggie asks. There’s a tiny hint of a smirk on her face, but it’s overshadowed by concern, like she can’t quite tell if Flynn’s going for laughter or sympathy and she’s trying to cover all her bases.

"I'm fine," Flynn says. "Can we get started?"

They do, but Flynn is completely off her game, and she's sure everyone can tell. They drop off sentences halfway through the point they were trying to make; they don't process a single word of Bobby's budget review; Julie has to wave them back from zoning out two separate times. She just can't get her brain to stick to anything with her blood boiling like this.

Luke is the one who breaks the tension, after Flynn forgets half of her own carefully crafted, years-old color coding system. “Okay, Flynn and I are taking a break,” he declares.

She eyes him skeptically, but Luke just says, “Come on, let’s go,” and pulls her up off the couch. “We’re gonna go for a quick drive,” he tells everyone else. “Don’t release any albums without us.”

“No promises!” Julie and Reggie chorus. Alex just gives them a thumbs-up, and Bobby tosses his keys over to Luke, who catches them and blows a kiss at him before he pushes Flynn out the door.

“We’re in the middle of a meeting,” Flynn says as she slides into the passenger’s seat.

“You’re in the middle of something more important,” Luke answers easily. “What’s up with your mom?”

“It’s not even like, a big thing,” Flynn says. “I just got stuck on something stupid she said.”

“You don’t get mad over nothing, though.”

“Ugh, I know. Like, I’m right, it’s just so annoying that I have to be the one affected by it. I just wanna know that she’s wrong and move on with my day, you know?”

“Yeah,” Luke says, and when Flynn lets the sound of the engine and the movement of the car fill the silence instead of her voice, he prompts, “So what was it that she said?”

“She’s mad that I think she’s homophobic? Which I didn’t even say to her face, she just assumes I’m saying it behind her back, which I am, but if she didn’t want me doing that she could have tried not being homophobic, right?”

“Definitely. Dude, didn’t she try to take your library card for reading too much queer stuff?”

“Yep!” Flynn confirms. “And for like, a year after I came out to her she made a point to let me know how uncomfortable every single rainbow accessory made her, and one of my dad’s brothers is gay too and she still doesn’t want us spending the night at his place and we never talk about that, and it’s just . . . okay, obviously I’m mad about those things, but it’s whatever, I just can’t stand that she gets to do all that and then turn around and tell me that the problem is me calling homophobia what it is.”

“Jesus.”

“Like, why the fuck does she get to make it my fault?”

"She doesn't," Luke says emphatically. He rolls to a stop at a light and turns to face her. "That's total bullshit and she has no right to make you feel bad for being right, you don't ever deserve that. Flynn, you're like, the coolest, most caring person I know, she's insane if she thinks you calling out her shit makes that less true."

The sheer earnestness is almost enough to make Flynn cry, and they should give him a real response, but . . . "The light's green."

"Shit, yeah," Luke says, eyes back on the road. "We're having a moment, okay?" he hollers at the cars honking behind them. "Assholes."

Flynn shakes their head. "It's like they don't know we're the main characters."

Luke grins, and they're quiet for a minute (or, Flynn is quiet; Luke is still muttering curses as he drives—less like he's mad and more like it's simply a requirement to keep the car moving). He pulls into a McDonald's parking lot and kills the engine, and Flynn says, "It is a little bit my fault, though."

Luke tenses, and before he can go on another trademarked validation rant, she adds, "I didn't do anything wrong. It's just . . . I can tell she's trying, right? Like, she has tried to have real conversations with me about queer stuff, and I don't think she can blame me for not being excited about that after she kept telling me how much she was 'really struggling with the whole rainbow thing,' but I also still get that it hurts when I brush her off. And it's not just with this; like, I know she's trying to be emotionally available in general, and I'm not engaging with that, and there's no way to not feel a little bit shitty about that."

"Yeah," Luke says. "Yeah, I definitely get that." He twists a ring around on his finger, slides it off and then right back on. “It's like . . . I'm glad I'm talking to my mom again, you know? I love her, and she knows I love her, and I can go and talk to her instead of hiding in the bushes, and I get to include her in the parts of my life I want her in, and, like, I actually feel like our relationship is good , and that's—I mean, I don't know if I ever thought we were gonna have that, especially after I left."

"Right," Flynn says. It's practically illegal for a friend to let Luke Patterson talk about his mom without offering some kind of physical comfort, but he won't want to keep his hands still long enough to hold hers, and hugging or leaning up against him are tricky in the car, so she settles for resting a hand on his knee.

He catches their eye for half a second before continuing, "But I think she thinks it's gonna keep getting better? Like, she's happy that we're talking again because she thinks it means we're on a path to getting closer, and I don't know if I can do that. I don't . . . I don't think I want to do that. Which I guess means I'm gonna be disappointing her for the whole rest of our lives." Luke ducks his head and pushes a hand back through his hair, a little self-conscious. "Was that . . . did I get it right, is that what you're feeling? Or did I go on the wrong kind of tangent?"

"No, you pretty much nailed it." Flynn sighs. “I love my mom, and I know I came into this with ‘I’m gonna kill her,’ but I really do think things are mostly good, and there are a lot of things she does right, it’s just that every time we try to actually talk, it ends up like this. So then I feel like we have too many fundamental differences for things to ever be better, and she feels like I’m not trying, and we never get anywhere, and it sucks .”

“Yeah,” Luke says.

Flynn pulls his hand over to her lap and fidgets with his bracelets as they speak. “I get why she’s hurt, and I get that some of the choices I’ve made have been hard for her, but I don’t know what to do, because like . . . I don’t know, it’s easy to be in favor of the idea of having hard conversations with the people you love, but then all the actual conversations we have are this bullshit” —Flynn waves their free hand meaninglessly; Luke seems to get the idea anyway— “so either I talk to her, and we both get upset about it, or I don’t, and she’s still upset, and there aren’t any better options when just existing as ourselves around each other hurts, so I just . . . exist a little less around her. And that hurts too.”

“Fuck,” Luke breathes. “Dude, come here.” They’ve given up on respecting the limitations the car puts on cuddling, then. Flynn isn't complaining. She clambers over to sit in Luke's lap, back against his window, side wedged against the steering wheel.

“I don’t think she gets that she pushed me away in the first place," she tells Luke. "She either doesn’t know what she did, or she doesn’t think my reaction is fair, and either way, neither of us think we’ve done anything wrong, so all she’s ever gonna see is how I keep rejecting her. That’s always what her story’s gonna be.”

“I know,” Luke says. “It sucks, and she’s wrong, and you deserve better than that, okay?”

“Okay,” Flynn echoes, noncommittal. They usually don’t have any trouble knowing their worth and knowing how they deserve to be treated, but mom stuff has a way of getting to them, of dragging every insecurity up with claws. Luke gets that better than anyone, though.

“I’m serious, she’s so lucky to have you. You know that, right? God, I never tried this hard to understand my mom’s side of things back when I lived with her.”

“Eh, mine doesn’t scream at me,” Flynn shrugs. “I think it balances out.”

“That’s fair,” Luke says. He sort of half lifts her up for a second so he can shift his legs, then adds, “They’re about even as far as having no way to win with them, though.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, like, all of our fights about music were like that; she’d get mad that I was doing too much band stuff and then she’d get mad that I didn’t want to tell her anything, and I think I always thought that if the band got far enough, she’d see it was all worth it? But every time we got closer to that it just freaked her out more.”

This isn’t new information to Flynn, she had the gist of that conflict already, but it’s nice to hear it again in a context that lets them know that Luke gets what they’re dealing with, and anyway, sometimes listening is less about learning anything new and more about just letting your friend say what they need to say.

“And I just spent a lot of time swinging back and forth between trying to hide everything from my parents and trying to throw it all in their faces,” Luke says, “because if they were going to be like that anyway, like, what was the point? Why not blow everything up? Maybe it would at least make them see how much it mattered to me, you know?”

“Yeah,” Flynn says, because that’s really the only thing to say. Like, yeah. Yeah . Exactly. Fuck.

"I dunno," Luke says, "we're better about the music thing than we used to be; I think she knows she can't push it too hard, but now she keeps getting on me to bring Bobby over for dinner like I don't know how that's gonna go."

Flynn raises their eyebrows. "Yikes."

"I know," Luke groans. "But I don't really have better options here, either, because if they don't see me, like, bring him to family stuff and go on real dates and gush about him all the time, both of my parents are gonna think that it's not serious, or that I'm wrong about my feelings, or that I'm not doing this relationship the right way, but then if they do see any of that, they're just gonna be weird and tense and judgey and I hate it."

"It's so stupid," Flynn says.

"So stupid," Luke agrees. "You ever think about how many problems we just wouldn't have if our parents knew how to chill out?"

"Alllll the time," Flynn sighs. "But hey, gotta give them props for keeping all those therapists in business."

Luke snorts, and Flynn decides they're officially out of serious mode now, so she says, "Okay, I love you, but I am not loving this steering wheel right now, I'm gonna—" She pushes off of Luke and does a little half-tumble, half-crawl back over to the passenger seat. "There."

Luke reaches for the keys, but he pauses, checks, "Did you get everything you needed? I didn't mean to take over or anything."

Flynn grins. "I was asking for it, we all know you win at mommy issues."

Luke sticks his tongue out at her. "Shut up."

"Seriously, you're good," Flynn assures him. They don't know how to say everything they mean to—that Luke putting words to his feelings was a gift to them, saved them the time and frustration of having to sort through everything on their own. That he's really good at this, at handing people pieces of his heart that reflect things in themselves that were hard to nail down. He can get avoidant about his feelings, and Flynn can't blame him, but when he makes the space to stumble through them honestly, he always hits something real.

Flynn tells him, "I feel better," and gives his hand a squeeze, and hopes that says enough.

[ckret2]

Do you have any headcanons about the Hazbin's (minus Charlie) lives back when they were alive?

I scrolled through all 42 pages of the hazbin tag on my blog and literally every one of my premortem headcanons are about Alastor and Sir Pentious lmfao

So sure! Want an entire novella about my headcanons for Sir Pentious's backstory?

For Alastor, I can offer:

a traumatic toddler experience

his mother observing him with ghosts as a child

Alastor working with demons (funny)

Alastor working with demons (creepy)

Alastor and his asexuality/aromanticism (mostly postmortem but it has some premortem flashbacks)

Alastor with friends in the 20s trying to explain he does not get horny

a fic that didn't ACTUALLY happen but that demonstrates my headcanons for how he works with demons

And moving away from fics and on to tumblr posts!

For Alastor:

Alastor fought in World War I

another WWI post

headcanon about how he died (I've since changed my headcanon—hunting accident rather than manhunt—but the position's the same)

excerpt from one of the fics above about Alastor's first kiss

early headcanoning on Alastor's relationship with the queer community in life

Alastor saw but didn't learn the lindy hop in life

Alastor's accent makes people (in this case Sir Pentious) think that he's upper class when actually he's just had theater training

Alastor's family tree comes from a mix of socioeconomic backgrounds and before he died he achieved fame but not fortune

Alastor does not feel broken/insecure due to being ace/aro and never has

what people in Louisiana thought of Alastor as a radio host

what did Alastor look like (and Sir Pent)

Alastor only saw 10% of the Golden Age Of Radio and that's fucked up

fun fact when Alastor was on air radio stations weren't "just news" or "just (one genre of) music," a single station would play music and news and soap operas and sports etc

random links of queer history, 1920s gay culture, slang, and NOLA history

Alastor's mother grew up while Sir Pentious was menacing the US and she has very vivid memories of living in fear of him, and also she doesn't know her son is a cannibalistic murderer

Alastor wore glasses in life and only switched to a monocle in death

Alastor was never identified as a serial killer and there's probably unsolved true crime documentaries made about his killings (and these documentaries unknowingly use a recording of the killer's real voice, a clip from a news broadcast where Alastor read about the killings on air)

check out how hyped this newspaper in the 20s was for radio like goddamn

Alastor listened to radio all day every day

more 1920s research links

very loose overview of New Orleans race relations 1890-1920

how NOT to write about Voodoo

reminder that "alastor did magic in life" is a headcanon until we SEE him using magic before he died—also "Voodoo" is a religion not a magic power

how Alastor avoided getting caught as a serial killer

I doubt Alastor was famous enough for queer historians to have discovered he existed, only niche radio broadcast historians know about him

Alastor was raised to be courteous to (respectable) women, but not to genuinely see them as equals in a modern sense

1920s hair facts and headcanons on Alastor's hair

scene from one of the above fics of baby Alastor being haunted as shit

Alastor is a hedonistic thrill killer not a mission-oriented killer

his killing method was shooting from a distance, like hunting game

Alastor was kinda psychic in life and his psychicness interacted with radio signals

this includes developing a hella accurate sense of time

Alastor's always been hella into Mardi Gras

here he is in a ridiculous Cajun Mardi Gras costume

how the Great Depression probably affected Alastor

Alastor feels 0% empathy for other people but 500% empathy for fictional characters in musicals

For Sir Pentious:

he was so infamous that today he's a common character used in historical fiction in the same way that Victorian-era historical fiction commonly uses Queen Victoria as a character

(and Sir Arthur Conan Doyle references him in a Sherlock story)

(and he really did call himself Sir Pentious in life)

(and every character who lived after him had to study him in school, including Vaggie writing a paper about him and Alastor was cast as him in a school play)

(and now let's talk about historians dying and meeting the people they studied in Hell)

he has a son who's probably now in heaven

Sir Pent is trans

no seriously he has a son

Sir Pent has a chain of deadnames he used before settling on "Sir Pentious" and all of them are snake puns

one of Sir Pent's chosen names

based on Victorian sexual mores Sir Pent probably got kinda homoerotic with some dudes

this is just big Trans Sir Pent energy

what did Sir Pent look like (and Alastor)

I don't think Sir Pent used a wheelchair in life (but do think he had to for a while after he died)

Sir Pent is Pussyeating World Champ no I do not accept arguments

Sir Pent and his wife were very loving until his wife went "nope, you're planning world conquest, that's too evil for me"

he rigged his clothes to self-combust so he could choose death if he was ever on the verge of capture

his wife was named Helena and here's why

this is his self-destruct binder/corset

the one headcanon everyone shares

Sir Pent ain't Jack the Ripper

And there's a ton more headcanons on @dontasktheradiodemon my Alastor ask/RP blog but listen, I just went through 42 pages of one tag and it's 3 a.m., I'm not going to comb my roleplay blog for every premortem headcanon I've ever mentioned about him over there. It includes stuff like "he did deliberately shitty horoscope readings on air" and "the first time he summoned a demon he was on the Western Front and also coming down with Spanish flu so he's not sure how much of the ensuing chaos was real vs fevered hallucinations or how much was the Germans' fault vs the imp's" and "he lived a few years in New York and did drag."

These are not the only headcanons I have. These are just the headcanons I've been asked about or made time to type down. (And not counting all my postmortem headcanons. Or the premortem headcanons sprinkled into postmortem fics.) Feel free to ask me for more. Ideally with a topic you'd like to hear about; otherwise asking me "do you have any headcanons?" is like walking into a library and asking "do you have any books?" Gimme a section to start with.