#like okay don’t get me wrong i love that hawkeye is hawkeye the show wouldn’t be the same if he wasn’t called hawkeye

[hawkeyeslaughter]

i wonder why you don’t call me by my name ?

uhh thie isn’t even really a sad song i’m just thinking about the inherent love you feel in someone you love calling you by your name and how hawk wasn’t called ben don’t LOOK AT ME

hawkeye x hawktrap & beejhawk // “ you never even called me by my name “ , david allen coe

[9worldstales]

MCU Loki: Why I fear they failed to deliver what they promised

At this point I’m kind of confused by who the “Loki” series is trying to reach or which is the goal/message they’re trying to pass along.

They had tried to intrigue assorted audience but, if you ask me, the series has often failed to deliver what it seemed to promise.

Of course I might be wrong. Or maybe I'm not seeing another type of audience the series aimed and managed to reach.

When the series started I wanted to keep a positive mentality and hope whatever seemed not to work would be fixed along the way or have a reason for existing that I just wasn't seeing because I hadn't seen the full story yet.

However, after 5 episodes I'm starting to lose hope the series will make a genuine effort to reach the fans at whom it seemed to aim.

PART 1 – “LOKI” IS NOT FOR THE OLD FANS WHO PRODUCED META SHOWING HOW HIS TRAUMA DAMAGED HIM

"I think it's the struggle with identity, who you are, who you want to be. I'm really drawn to characters who are fighting for control. Certainly you see that with Loki over the first 10 years of movies, he's out of control at pivotal parts of his life, he was adopted and everything and that manifest itself through anger and spite towards his family." [Loki's Struggle With His Identity Confirmed To Be A Focus Of His Disney+ Series]

What was it about Loki as a character that attracted you? He’s just fun, for one. He has a very playful sense of humor about him. I like how he never quite lets you know what he’s thinking. Beyond that, what I connect to about him is the same thing the legions of fans do, which is his humanity and his vulnerability. This is a guy who—yes, on the one hand, he was the prince of Asgard, seems like a nice life—but his father, in fact, killed his actual birth father, adopted him, lied to him about his heritage and parentage his entire life, he was forced to live in the shadow of his oafish older brother who was born to be king. He’s experienced a lot of trauma, and I think that what he’s looking for is just a little bit of control over his life. Which he feels like maybe he’s never quite had. That’s something I think we can all relate with. [From Loki to Doctor Strange and Star Wars, Michael Waldron Is the New Franchise Whisperer]

Let’s be honest, the audience for the “Loki” series is not really meant to be Marvel movies old time fans who enjoyed “Thor” and “The Avengers”, made countless Meta analyzing Loki’s behaviour and who wanted answers about what happened to Loki prior to “The Avengers” or wanted to see Loki’s family terrible dynamics be discussed, or at least to see explored the wrong dynamics of Loki’s interracial adoption (he’s taken away from his planet, the truth is hidden from him, his look is changed to disguise him as an Asgardian, nothing is done against the racial hate for the Jotuns at which Loki is exposed, even witnessing it from his brother) or talk how much in control of himself Loki was during “The Avengers” (okay, the web said the sceptre manipulated Loki, but what about acknowledging that in his own series? It doesn’t have to come from Loki who had no idea he was manipulated but someone could mention ‘think yourself lucky here the stones don’t work, they’ve the nasty tendency to manipulate people’).

The series has avoided digging into all that as much as they could.

Even when Loki talks with Sylvie, the most we get is a small big about how Frigga was awesome in his eyes and taught him magic, but this isn’t meant to explain any of the issues Loki had with his family, it just make Sylvie feel bad because she can’t remember her adoptive mother, as for the D.B. Cooper born out of a bet with Thor, yeah, fun but completely random. What’s meant to be the message about family dynamics here, that it was the bets between Thor and Loki that caused Loki to decide to conquer Earth? Or what about the Sif loop? Is it there to push on Loki the blame of his poor relation with Sif?

No, clearly not.

In regard to Loki the Frigga flashback is there to remark he had a loving and supportive family while the other two are there to have Loki admit he is ‘a mischievous scamp’, ‘a horrible person’ and ‘a narcissist’.

To put it in Classic Loki’s words: ‘Damn it! Animals, animals! We lie and we cheat, we cut the throat of every person who trusts us, and for what? Power. Glorious power. Glorious purpose! We cannot change. We're broken, every version of us. Forever. And whenever one of us dares try to fix themselves, they're sent here to die.’

In short it’s all Loki’s fault if he does bad, nothing happened to him that could have messed him up, he’s just a horrible person… however…

PART 2 – “LOKI” IS NOT FOR THE OLD AND NEW FANS WHO BELIEVED LOKI TO BE A DANGEROUS, EVIL, PSYCHOPATH VILLAIN EITHER

"Loki is an a**, and that makes my life as a writer, easy." ... "Due to the trauma in Loki’s life, I would even [accept a story] in which he is committed to being all bad." [Michael Waldron on Loki: He’s an a**. That makes things easy]

Considering the series is trying to pin SOLELY on Loki his wrongdoing, completely skipping the toxic way in which he was raised you might think they want to paint him as an evil, psychopath who was just born bad.

But no, that’s not the intention, we see it from the start.

Loki is given a quick briefing on how his beloved family loved him despite him hurting them, a briefing that contains false information which would work if we accept the briefing as manipulative but, at this point I’m not so sure that was the author’s intent. The Doylist purpose of the briefing is clearly to show the audience how Loki cares for his family, how he still has feelings, feels pain at the idea Frigga and Odin died and wish to make up with his brother.

It’s not just they loved him and did nothing wrong toward him, it’s also he who loved them and didn’t mean to harm them. That’s why we’re fed that damn discourse about Loki sending the Dark Elves to kill Frigga, because the series wants to remark that no, Loki didn’t want to kill his family, he loved them.

Tom Hiddleston used to say what Loki is came from a place of pain but the series didn’t explore that place of pain… it just gave him more pain and not just in episode 1. Episode 2 has him discovering Asgard is destroyed, episode 3 has him remembering Frigga, episode 4 shows him believing Sylvie die and watching Mobius being pruned. He doesn’t cry in Ep 5, episode 5 wants us to truly feel bad for Sylvie, not for him, but there’s a lot of bitterness from Classic Loki who commits a heroic suicide so you might say we get a sad Loki anyway.

And this also works as a shock to make him change his mind about his ‘glorious purposes’. Sorta, with Thor reminding us he’s not so bad and Loki explaining his behaviour as “I don't enjoy hurting people. I... I don't enjoy it. I do it because I have to, because I've had to. Because it's part of the illusion. It's the cruel, elaborate trick conjured by the weak to inspire fear.”

Plot-wise, this is completely useless.

The show will prove Sylvie is not Loki and has completely different motivations and Mobius, being an expert in Variants, should know.

What’s more why would Mobius care if Loki enjoys hurting people or not?

His goal is to capture Sylvie with Loki’s help. The most he should care about is how to keep Loki loyal to him, not if Loki has fun hurting people or not which, in fact, is a knowledge that won’t be used in his investigation.

No, this is here for the viewers, to tell them Loki isn’t a sadistic, evil villain, he’s someone weak who tries to scare others so as not to look weak. As Mobius will put in ‘a scared little boy, shivering in the cold’ who has an ‘insecure need for validation’.

What’s more?

The show will try his hardest to establish he’s not even competent.

Let’s talk of him as a fighter.

In the movies Loki is a competent fighter and side material establish he’s pretty strong, definitely much more than a human.

In “The Avengers” we see Captain America needs Iron Man’s help to beat him and, anyway, Loki’s plan was to be captured. Loki manages to walk away on his feet when Coulson hits him with that superspecial weapon and it’ll take him to be Hulk smashed after a fight with Thor and a meeting with an explosive arrow of Hawkeye before he can’t fight any longer.

This doesn’t happen in the “Loki” series.

Loki gets beaten up by various people in 4 episodes, preferably women (B-15, the people possessed by Sylvie, the guards on the train, Sif). You might say in episode 5 he’s not but actually Classic Loki is the one who gets swallowed by Alioth and our Loki instead survives because he has Sylvie supporting him as, on his own he couldn’t even distract Alioth.

Let’s talk of him as a wizard.

He can use magic, impressive magic but… it serves him mostly nothing. In the TVA his magic doesn’t work. Outside of it is mostly useless. It doesn’t help win fights. The Tempad he caused to disappear gets broken. To beat Alioth they needs enchantment, not his own magic. What’s more, when they’ve to go on the train his disguise wouldn’t have worked without Sylvie’s enchantment and, if this wasn’t enough, he got drunk, removed the disguise and wasn’t even able to make tickets appear.

Classic Loki too, with his impressive illusions is ultimately a distraction. Alioth tears easily through his illusions which aren’t even solid.

Let’s talk of him as a planner.

All Loki will accomplish is to escape from the Time theatre for a brief period in episode 1 and figure out Sylvie hides in apocalypses in episode 2. The rest of his plans fails or are not plan or are mocked over and not even put into practice.

Let’s talk about him as a manipulator with a silver tongue.

He can’t even persuade Mobius when he’s telling him the truth, Mobius dismisses it as a lie due to ‘cockroach's survival mechanism’.

And psychologically?

He’s just someone who crave attention because he’s a narcissist scared of being alone. Not a psychopath.

Loki is not meant to be a dangerous, evil, psychopath villain in this series, he’s a not serious man, a clown, a scared little boy in need of attention, a narcissist who needs to be loved.

Welcome to cartoon villain Loki, this Loki isn’t the Variant of “The Avengers” Loki, he’s the Variant of “Avengers Assemble”Loki… only he’s even less competent than him.

PART 3 – “LOKI” IS NOT EVEN HERE FOR GENERAL MARVEL MOVIE FANS

"That's a lot of Infinity Stones. That's true but they are useless there in the TVA, so I don't know. Is that gun loaded or not? We'll see..." [Loki Writer Comments On Whether TVA’s Infinity Stones Will Return In MCU]

“We had to create an insane institutional knowledge of how time travel would work within the TVA so the audience never has to think about it again. It was a lot of drawings of squiggly timelines.” Marvel already made its case for how time travel works in Avengers: Endgame, but that, Waldron points out, “is the way the Avengers understand it.” With a TV show it’s a little different. “I was always very acutely aware of the fact that there’s a week between each of our episodes and these fans are going to do exactly what I would do, which is pick this apart. We wanted to create a time-travel logic that was so airtight it could sustain over six hours. There’s some time-travel sci-fi concepts here that I’m eager for my Rick and Morty colleagues to see.” [How the Man Behind LokiIs Shaping Marvel’s Phase 4 and Beyond]

BC: The TVA is there to clean everybody up? MW: Yeah, Avengers: Endgame… that's how The Avengers understand time travel. 'Loki,' episode one, is how the TVA explains time travel to Loki and we're certainly building on what's come before us. [Loki: Michael Waldron On Gender Fluidity, Mephisto, Time Travel & More]

It’s true “Loki” is focusing on a new corner of the MCU but it interconnects very poorly with the movies before it.

Although Loki escaped with the Tesseract... it just dismisses completely the Infinity Stones.

Despite talking a lot about timelines and creating branching realities it waved away the whole plot of "Avengers: Endgame" as apparently supposed to happen even though it should have created branching realities.

We see Renslayer wave away how the Avengers went in the past causing the Tesseract to end up in Loki’s hands... and all the other things the Avengers did that affected the past goes unmentioned.

Bruce meeting the Ancient, Thor meeting his mother and taking away Thor’s hammer, Rocket being seen as he steals the reality stone from Jane, Tony stealing a suitcase and damaging the place in which the Tesseract was kept then meeting Howard Stark, 4 flacons of Pyn particles missing, an alarm given to the military bases, how Steve managed to bring back the sceptre if that timeline was pruned, how a timeline handled being without Thanos and Co as they went in the future or how they clearly didn’t bring the orb back the second they took it as Nebula remained unconscious there and nobody came and when she woke up Thanos could get her. It didn’t even explain why Steve remaining with Peggy didn’t change anything.

It's not that the audience has all explained... it's that they were told to dismiss it as 'meant to happen' and that was it.

What's more, the TVA apparently didn't list a finger to stop 2014 Thanos from going in the future and causing Tony Stark's death.

As if this wasn't enough, “Loki” just skips any possible connection with the movies, even hands Loki false information about them (he lead the Dark Elves to his mother when Loki had no idea the Kurse was a Dark Elf and they would have found her anyway as they were searching for the Aether which Malekith could sense, he’s born solely to cause pain and suffering and death, overlooks how he saved Jane twice or helped the Asgardian escape Hela) and never discusses them again.

Even with Classic Loki, who’s a Variant of “Avengers: Infinity War” Loki, they don’t talk about what happened after Loki’s supposed dead, apparently hinting it was better if he died, nor explain how Loki knew Thor survived.

PART 4 – “LOKI” IS NOT REALLY OFFERING A GOOD REPRESENTATION FOR FEMALES EVEN THOUGH IT CLEARLY AIMS AT FEMALE AUDIENCE

Let’s make a quick experiment.

Everyone, let’s name all the characters we remember which appeared in more than 1 episode of “Loki” for more than one minute.

We’ve, of course, Loki, Mobius, B-15, Renslayer, Sylvie, C-20 and Miss Minute.

5 females versus 2 males.

What’s more, females are not sexualized, they remains completely dressed, they’re clearly not there to attract male gazes, they’re represented as strong, dangerous, in control, something archived often by showing them beating males either physically or intellectually or in rank.

It seems promising. At first.

Is there someone who’s sexualized?

The “Loki” series takes care to offer us Tom Hiddleston naked.

So since there’s an abundance of females in the cast and Tom Hiddleston is shown naked is it aiming at a female audience?

Very, very likely but… but how’s then handled all this?

When Loki is seen undressed he’s not in a situation of power, like Thor who’s twice shows half naked in his movies but because he’s changing/washing and perfectly comfortable in showing his body and once in a situation which could be a male forbidden fantasy, to have many women massage your naked body, no, he’s shown as he’s powerless while being stripped by a machine. Clearly not a male power fantasy, more like a male nightmare.

And, in a totally not surprising way, pictures of this scene were spread by many female fans because it was aimed at them… though a part of them, was also honestly appalled at seeing this scene in contest, finding the forced stripping humiliating and degrading.

Sure, a naked Tom Hiddleston makes a nice eye-candy but this wasn’t how Loki’s many fans wanted to see Loki naked.

But let’s talk of female representation here, since the show seems to be interested in female audience… only who even though this was the representation women wanted doesn’t understand much of women representation in the first place.

Why?

For start because women here are all the same type of woman.

Strong fighters who’re in control and confident, with no real characterization beyond this to speak of despite the large amount of screen time.

Renslayer is an ex-hunter who can fight one on one against Sylvie and who clearly has the position of power she has because she was good as a hunter and shows her abilities in fighting after that Sylvie had beaten 2 guards at the same time. B-15 is introduced by beating Loki and is the commander of a squad. C-20 is another commander and, albeit possessed, can dispose of a part of her squad members.

Do I need to spend words on how Sylvie is depicted as this awesome fighter who has learnt to fight by herself, can keep at bay more than 1 Minuteman, can use a sword, has learnt enchantment on her own and is feared by all the TVA? Do I?

And it’s awesome to have women who are strong fighters in positions of command/power/control… but why women has to be represented as just that?

Even when they add a female as an one episode cameo, it's Sif, beating the hell out of Loki. And what about the Lady in Lamentis 1 who was too old to be strong but managed to blast away both Loki and Sylvie seeing through their deceptions?

Even the harmless Miss Minute can avoid being hit by Loki and gets she has to pretend to do researches to stall Sylvie and save Renslayer.

Women kick asses here… but that’s all they’re good for.

And so we get to Sylvie, who is the superior Loki Variant… because she’s female.

Kid Loki: You're different. Why? Loki: No, I'm not, you see? I'm the same, really. I'm the same as all of you. Have any of you met a woman Variant of us? Classic Loki: Sounds terrifying. Loki: Oh, she is. But that's kind of what's great about her. She's different. She's not trying to take over the TVA, she's trying to take it down. And she needs me. Now, you said Alioth is what keeps us here. You said it's a living thing. You said it's a shark. Well, if it lives, it dies. So I'm gonna kill the shark. I'm gonna kill Alioth, and I could use all the help I can get.

That’s what Loki preaches to his fellow Lokis who think a woman Loki would be terrific.

I mean, they’ve an alligator Loki, a POC Loki, but the one who has to be different is the female Loki. Because being female is a character trait.

Mobius: Okay. I feel like I'm always looking up to you. I like it. It's appropriate. [Ep 1]

Basically females in the “Loki” series are all representation of the Action girl trope and aren’t even different representation of said trope. I mean, “The Avengers” have 5 actions boy who’re clearly as different as they could be. Girls can be represented as different too, if they really aim at young audience they can take good old “Sailor Moon” as an example. 5 action girls who are strong and determinate AND DIFFERENT, more than just someone who kicks the adversary away.

And it’s not like they don’t know how to characterize people in a different way.

Mobius is an analyst who shows sympathetic traits toward the Variants and a certain level or intelligence. U-92 and D-90 are hunters who are shown to held Variants in little regard (U-92 wanted to attack the boy they found in the church, D-90 mistreated the scared people in the shelter). Casey is an harmless and naïve guy who had never seen a fish. The guy who made Loki sign the papers about what he said seemed emotionless but he clearly loved cats as not only he had one but on his cup there was also the image of a cat. Martin is clearly a bossy daddy’s son, who think too high of himself to the point he can’t respect rules. The boy in the church, despite thinking Sylvie was a demon, accepted and ate food she gave him and remained in the place despite the crime. He’s clearly more brave than he looked like but he’s also naïve as he easily trusted ‘the demon’ and Mobius.

What’s C-20 character trait when she gets described by Sylvie?

Sylvie: Yeah. She was just a regular person on Earth. Loki: A regular person? Sylvie: Loved margaritas.

She’s a regular person who loves margaritas. Liking a drink is not a character trait!

There’s a more diverse female representation in “Thor” than in “Loki”.

In “Thor” we’ve Frigga, queen of Asgard, loving mother and wife who’s powerless to erase Thor’s banishment. We’ve Sif, a dangerous and loyal warrior. We’ve Jane, the amazing scientist with a lot of enthusiasm. We’ve Darcy, who’s funny and who seems focused mostly on herself but who, when the city is attacked, worried to save all the animals at the pet store.

But maybe the one who gets the worst treatment is the supposed heroine, Sylvie, because the poor girl is turned into a Mary Sue.

In case someone isn’t familiar with the term:

“The prototypical Mary Sue is an original female character in a fanfic who obviously serves as an idealized version of the author mainly for the purpose of Wish Fulfillment. She's exotically beautiful, often having an unusual hair or eye colour, and has a similarly cool and exotic name. She's exceptionally talented in an implausibly wide variety of areas, and may possess skills that are rare or nonexistent in the canon setting. She also lacks any realistic, or at least story-relevant, character flaws — either that or her "flaws" are obviously meant to be endearing. She has an unusual and dramatic Back Story. The canon protagonists are all overwhelmed with admiration for her beauty, wit, courage and other virtues, and are quick to adopt her as one of their True Companions, even characters who are usually antisocial and untrusting; if any character doesn't love her, that character gets an extremely unsympathetic portrayal. She has some sort of especially close relationship to the author's favourite canon character — their love interest, illegitimate child, never-before-mentioned sister, etc. Other than that, the canon characters are quickly reduced to awestruck cheerleaders, watching from the sidelines as Mary Sue outstrips them in their areas of expertise and solves problems that have stymied them for the entire series.” [tvtropes.org]

So let’s see how she fits this checklist:

1) She's exotically beautiful, often having an unusual hair or eye colour: Sylvie painted her hair blonde even though the Lokis are supposed to be black haired

2) has a similarly cool and exotic name: She is the only Loki Variant who has changed her name from Loki to Sylvie.

3) She's exceptionally talented in an implausibly wide variety of areas, and may possess skills that are rare or nonexistent in the canon setting: Awesome at fighting she can enchant people, an ability the Lokis don’t posses, that she magically learnt on her own and that is necessary in the story. Also she figured out how a Tempad worked BEFOREseeing it in action.

4) She also lacks any realistic, or at least story-relevant, character flaws — either that or her "flaws" are obviously meant to be endearing: No flaws, all her plans involve fighting and brute force is no substitute for diplomacy and guile, which could be a flaw… if it wasn’t for the fact that the series will prove Sylvie can plan just fine without using fighting and brute strength and also be successful at it.

5) She has an unusual and dramatic Back Story: She was taken by the TVA when she was younger than Kid Loki but managed to escape them and had to live alone and on the run till then.

6) The canon protagonists are all overwhelmed with admiration for her beauty, wit, courage and other virtues, and are quick to adopt her as one of their True Companions, even characters who are usually antisocial and untrusting: Loki, who has never loved anyone, falls for her, Mobius saves her and apologizes to her, B-15, who used to look down at Variants, basically asks her what should they do and is shown admiring her, the Lokis don’t criticize her plan, Classic Loki dies to save her, everyone views her as the superior Loki Variant.

7) if any character doesn't love her, that character gets an extremely unsympathetic portrayal: Renslayer, the hunter who has arrested her, is currently playing the part of the antagonist who’s fascist and believes in a murderous, lying cult.

8) She has some sort of especially close relationship to the author's favourite canon character — their love interest, illegitimate child, never-before-mentioned sister, etc.: She’s the Variant and love interest of the titular character.

9) Other than that, the canon characters are quickly reduced to awestruck cheerleaders, watching from the sidelines as Mary Sue outstrips them in their areas of expertise and solves problems that have stymied them for the entire series: Loki, the title character, has conveniently been turned into someone who’s a weak fighter and incapable of planning which Sylvie has to save by enchanting guards or giving him her sword or pruning herself or teaching him how to enchant and coming up with all the plans.

Now all she needs in order to be a perfect Mary Sue is to know how to sing well as Mary Sue usually do this as well, though I’m sure she can do it because Loki could so she surely can.

Sylvie is amazing, Loki himself said so:

Loki: No. We may lose. Sometimes painfully. But we don't die. We survive. I mean, you did. You were just a child when the TVA took you, but you nearly took down the organization that claims to govern the order of time. You did it on your own. You ran rings around them. You're amazing!

There’s nothing inherently wrong in having a new female character who’s competent, for whom the hero falls and who changes him… if all this is built around a solid plot.

Think at “Iron Man”.

Tony Stark is, to quote Tony Stark himself a “genius, billionaire, playboy, philanthropist”.

It’s amazing, isn’t it? But the movie shows us why he’s that.

It spends time setting up his pedigree, how he inherited the money and intelligence from his father, how he was supported as he grew and studied becoming always a greater genius. Tony shows himself to be charming before seducing his first woman onscreen so that when he does it makes sense. His philanthropic activities are, at first, just mentioned but seems rooted in how his father was a hero who helped fighting Nazi and then they became his mission. He felt guilty he was a merchant of death and tried to make up for it.

Sylvie too could have a solid plot behind herself.

Instead than magically knowing what a TemPad does and how it works and managing to escape with it, she could have escaped with, let’s say, a hunter that discovered the truth and decided to rebel to the TVA or just had pity of her. Maybe another Mobius Variant who used to work at the TVA prior to Mobius and that, instead than an analyst was a hunter. She might have learnt fighting from him and then he too died and she was left alone.

Enchantment might have been an ability she might have learnt coming in contact with a mind stone. It could have been an occasion also to talk how mind stones can influence people negatively. Or it could have been taught to her by Frigga who, with a female daughter, decided to teach her a different type of magic than Loki.

Her past could have been explored more instead than being tragic for the sake of tragic. We might have seen her fall in love and either be betrayed or have to say goodbye to her loved one because that reality got pruned. We might have seen her being interested in males and females alike as she’s supposed to be interested in both.

She could have had discussions with Loki that weren’t just about Frigga or about how the TVA kidnapped her from Asgard, she escaped and from that point on she was always on the run, or about how love didn’t feel real, but more about how they were, how they felt, what hurt them and what made them happy, what they liked and what they disliked, their ideals and their fears, things that can built up a relation.

Loki basically fall for her because she’s on a mission for revenge instead than power and seems confident. That’s his reasoning.

She falls for Loki… because apparently he’s the person who spend time with her who praised her. That’s not a solid love story, that’s desperation.

SYlvie could have flaws, she could have learnt diplomacy or persuasion from Loki or could have something she lacks and Loki has so that they would complete each other.

And since the purpose was to have Sylvie and Loki fall for each other… they could have let Loki have characteristics that can motivate the exceptional heroine to fall in love for him PRIOR to him falling in love for her. He might be shown good at something, instead than just a clown.

Even if we say the real purpose of this series was to turn Sylvie into the protagonist, the heroine, a good Loki character was still needed to explain why this awesome girl would fall for him.

So okay, there will surely still be women who can see themselves in Sylvie and imagine they got Loki… and it’s not bad really… but I think we deserved more.

Long story short, yes, “Loki” has many females in its cast and this is meant to draw the female audience… but the representation is poor as almost all of the females have no character traits and Sylvie is just a Mary Sue with no realistic characterization.

A good female representation is diverse and solid. Women don't need to be born irrealistically perfect out of nothing to be good, they can inherith and grow and learn to be as such like any human being.

Last but not least…

PART 5 – DOES “LOKI” REALLY OFFERS REPRESENTATION TO THE LGBT COMMUNITY?

BC: There is a lot of talk on social media about Loki being gender fluid. Wouldn't that actually be a natural fit for the character? MW: Yeah, I guess as, with all questions pertaining to that stuff, I think those answers, truly, are best experienced in the watching of the show, as opposed to me trying to answer them. Because it's just watching it and the way that's addressed and everything will just be more fulfilling. BC: Why do you think it's important that Loki is gender fluid? MW: I think that Loki is a character that a lot of fans see representation in. People that haven't felt represented before, and they see themselves in Loki and everything. So we want to do justice to the character, to who the character is in the comics and in Norse mythology as well. And you also … you know you want folks to feel represented, and everything. That's why it's important. It always has been. It comes from everybody on the creative team. [Loki: Michael Waldron On Gender Fluidity, Mephisto, Time Travel & More]

The series hugely spread the info that this Loki would be fluid and Bisexual. The news were welcomed with delight and it’s awesome how the series didn’t hesitate to put it on paper.

Loki being fluid was written for everyone to see, and Loki having male and female interests was spelled out for everyone to hear.

IT’S A GREAT THING!

However…

It’s all we got.

It had no relevance into the plot whatsoever, it’s just a random info we’re given.

Him being fluid was on a paper along with his other data like eye colour and birth planet.

Him being interested in males and females seems to be put there just to imply he tried a large amount of people before deciding love didn’t feel real.

Assuming the other Lokis too were fluid, they actually found terrific the idea of a woman Loki in a not positive way. They weren’t interested or asking for clarifications about what Loki meant.

Loki’s bisexuality doesn’t even get a side story, them sending Fandral to beat Loki instead than Sif because Loki cheated on him or something. I’m not upset Loki ended up with a female, this is one of the possibilities of a Bisexual person. I’m upset that this was used merely to attract the audience but then wasn’t explored. They could have said Asgard was open minded with it, or disapproved it so Loki had to keep it hidden, or it could have been Sylvie who discussed some experience in that regard.

We were told over and over it was a show about identity. We expected it to be explored instead we were just told ‘ah, by the way, Loki is bisexual, let’s move on.’ And that was all.

Having representation from an important Marvel character is always important, especially considering the shortage of representation. But honestly I expected more.

PART 7 – TO SUM IT UP

Many of the people who worked in “Loki” are fantastic actors. They worked hard for this series, I can see they tried their best.

The premises for the “Loki” series are interesting.

We get a Loki who hadn’t experienced most of what happened in the movies yet, we make him confront with someone who knows his life, the one he lived and the one he was meant to live and we also make him confront with Variations of himself.

Loki has the Tesseract and the TVA has plenty of infinity stones, we could explore them.

The TVA itself have a fascist organization that dictates people’s lives and murders whoever tries to do differently, that goes so far as to brainwash the people working in it, which mistreats and belittle the Variants and establish a manipulative cult around the Time-Keeper with elements of police brutality which could be very actual.

Time travelling was the plot of "Avengers: Endgame" they could have tied the movie to the series, esplore the why some time travels were allowed and some weren't or their effects.

There were references to plenty of awesome comics they could take inspiration from.

But unless it redeems itself with the last episode… well, so far it’s failing to deliver what it promised due to a really poor plot which doesn’t give the characters a chance to be themselves or to be characterized as they’ve no real story nor real differences to speak of.

They’re given more time than a movie as they’re a series… but that’s no good excuse for wasting said time.

I’m still hoping the last episode will be spectacular, that it’ll manage to erase the messes of the other 5… but, as of now I’m disappointed.

I’ll just keep my fingers crossed and hope they’ll surprise me.

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Dwayne having a crush on you would include~

(Not my gif)(Requested by several anonymous asks)

(Just a reminder~ you can always send in a request for more specific crush hcs, like focusing on one of these scenarios or one of your own.)

- There’s two scenarios that I can see as being particularly plausible when it comes to Dwayne crushing on you for any extended length of time: 1) You have a boyfriend when the two of you first meet, or 2) You’re a friend of Stars.

- I refuse to believe that anyone would not hop on this man the minute he so much as looks at them which is why these scenarios share the same “somewhat forbidden love aspect”.

- In the Stars friend case, Star would have probably tried to keep you a secret, both for your own safety and because she wouldn’t want them to turn you; even if you wanted to be turned.

- If we’re going with the boyfriend angle, then the boys probably invited you and your boyfriend into the cave; sort of like what they did with Michael but they’re more so looking to get a delivered meal rather than a new family member.

- They hadn’t expected to like you as much though and they wound up letting you both go that night, planning on eating your boyfriend, and meeting up with you again respectively, at a later date.

- To start things off, it’s important to mention that Dwayne isn’t a big talker. He’s not really shy per say but he doesn’t outwardly flirt like the other boys in the gang which is another reason that I chose those meeting scenarios.

- If he wasn’t thrown into hanging out with you, he would; most likely, take a long time to approach you in any way; especially if you want him to approach you without the other boys.

- If he isn’t forced to approach you, then he’ll; most likely, just borderline stalk you from afar before he finally gets the perfect opportunity to talk to you/introduce himself.

- But back to the scenarios~ Dwayne’s been alive for a fairly long time and in that time he’s seen a lot of pretty girls, but you? You take the cake. He likes you the minute he sees you; though he’s pretty good at playing it cool.

- Dwayne rarely ever leaves the gang to go off on his own so you’re usually with the entire group whenever you’re together. There’s only a few instances where you’ll be completely alone together and they only happen once in a blue moon.

- He doesn’t say much but his face says everything for him. You’re either blind or in denial if you can’t see the adoration written all over his face when he looks at you.

- It’s basically a given with the boys that when you’re sitting down, the seat next to yours is his seat. He’ll literally have a stare down with one of the other boys and then act as though nothing happened, plopping down next to you and giving you a little smile.

- Girls like guys who are good with kids, right? He knew Laddie would come in handy one day! (Just kidding he loves him regardless.) Anytime you’re around, he makes a subtle show of being extra sweet with the boy and showing off his dad skills. You can’t deny that its adorable, even if kids aren’t your thing.

- He’s fairly good at keeping his composure so you probably won’t even really realize it, but he’s incredibly protective of you. Depending on the situation, he’ll either 1) just check in on you and make sure you’re okay, 2) stare someone down until they leave on their own accord, or 3) follow them as they go so that he can have a “talk” with them. Not much talking happens....

- Being your fake boyfriend is the highlight of his night, though the whole situation makes him feel; at least, twelve different emotions all at once. He loves getting to act like you’re together but he hates that it’s just that; an act. 

- You almost always have two shadows whenever you’re out at night. He always seems to find himself standing behind you, or; if you’re in a big crowd, he’ll hold your hand so that you don’t get lost and he’ll clear a path for the two of you.

- The boys constantly mess with him for his soft spot towards you and it makes him extremely uncomfortable. He usually ends up shoving them off his shoulders and tugging at his jacket awkwardly, telling them he “doesn’t have a soft spot” though they all know it’s a lie.

- Dwayne is one of the more loyal vampires of the group so regardless of how you meet, he’s going to introduce you to the rest of the gang and get David’s permission. Though, if he does introduce you, it’s because you’re sure you want to become like them and soon.

- The gentleman™. He’s always the one who hangs back and helps you down from tall places or opens doors for you.

- Mr. Hawkeyes can’t ever seem to shift his gaze from you for too long; if nothing else is distracting him. You’ll oftentimes catch him looking over at you and admiring how beautiful you are; you aren’t aware of that part but nearly everyone else is.

- Phone calls every night, or quick visits. He makes sure to check in everyday to see if you’re coming to hang out or to say goodnight or to make sure he knows where you’re going. He likes to hear your voice and make you smile before bed. And his phone voice, by the way; 10/10: truly orgasmic.

- He lives for those moments where he can brush something off your face/hair or clasp your necklace for you. Those little intimate moments are almost enough to jumpstart his heart back to life.

- Star puts in a good word for him because, if there’s anyone in the group that she genuinely likes, it’s Dwayne. She’ll drop little hints that you should be with him and tell you about the sweet things he’s done for everyone, giving you a look and feeling a swell of hope when you chuckle nervously.

- She thinks that if you’re gonna be a vampire; which is the most plausible outcome of your friendship now that the boys know about you, you should at least you’ll be with one of the good vamps.

- Model-worthy face? Check. Cool aesthetic? Check. Motorcycle? Check. Tall, dark and mysterious thing going on? Check. If you have a boyfriend when you become friends with Dwayne, then be prepared for jealousy because your boyfriend is going to take notice of his perfect …everything and his obvious interest in you.

- He’s always so smug and happy whenever you hug him, especially if he knows your boyfriend doesn’t like him. He always gives the boy a look behind your back and tightens his arms just a little bit more around you, usually causing one of the other boys to grin or chuckle.

- Yeah, you might have smashed, but I made sure she was alright after her boyfriend dumped her! Dwayne’s the sweetest. Here’s always there for you anytime you seem down or outwardly tell him that somethings wrong. He’s your shoulder to cry on even if the problems you’re telling him about make him want to yell and tear his hair out; i.e. boy troubles.

- With Dwayne, it’s not necessarily a given that he’ll confess before you do. Depending on the situation, he might hold off on telling you, thinking it isn’t his place to bring it up at that point in time. He doesn’t want to force his feelings on you, he wants to have a fair chance of you actually being able to tell him you like him back.

- He’d be perfectly fine with you confessing that you liked him first, and in some cases would prefer it. After you do so, he’d immediately tell you about his own feelings, saying how he’d liked you from the moment he saw you and all those other sweet little things people say when they’re pouring their hearts out.

- If he does tell you how he feels first, then it’s because he feels like it’s the right time and that there’s no point in holding it back any longer. He’ll usually start off by calling you beautiful before launching into a slow and sweet confession.

- He makes sure that you know you have the right to say no and that he would never hold it against you, even though the thought of you not liking him back makes him sick.

- He’d probably kiss you right then and there if you accepting his feelings, unable to hold it back any longer. Believe me when I say, it’s the start of something incredibly beautiful.

[moonlayl]

Thoughts on ScarletVision?

You mean WendySiri? Just kidding, just kidding. (sorry for the late reply). I assume you’re talking about the show ‘WandaVision’ but since I’m not sure I’ll also share my thoughts on the actual ship. 

 (long and negative rant)

Okay so throughout the entire show, I was kind of conflicted. Marvel did a really good job with all the clues and the suspense, and also the whole sitcom-through -the-decades kind of thing, and I applaud them for that. it honestly was really good and interesting and I really loved it. The show had so much potential, but that’s where things went wrong. 

A part of it is on me for assuming, or more accurately, wanting, but I was waiting for the reveal that Wanda was being controlled or manipulated. Obviously that didn’t happen, and it just ruined the character for me. This show literally took everything that I liked about Wanda, and everything that made me sympathize with her or even defend her, and then changed it for the worst. I was a fan but not anymore. Wanda’s character through the other movies was someone who tried to do better. Like she joined the avengers to fix her mistakes and to help people. She hurt people in civil war and was guilty over it. She killed Vision to try and save the world and stop Thanos. WandaVision took a big dump on all of that. 

I know many will use the “she’s grieving” card, and while it’s important to note, does it really excuse torturing and mindcontrolling a whole town? “But it was an accident. She didn’t mean to.” Yeah, at first. She discovered what she’d done way back in episodes 2/3 and decided to keep it. “She didn’t know she was hurting them.” But she knew she was violating them and keeping them captive. She knew they were actual people. And she still went with it. She didn’t care.

Fake Pietro says he admires what she’s done and she goes “you don’t think it’s wrong” Like she is literally self-aware. Vision, the man she loves is literally scared and confused and she goes “can’t I?” when he says she can’t control him. Broooooo. Wtf was that? Like she literally admitted to wanting to control him, or at least doing it, and wasn’t even ashamed? And in one of the episodes, despite literally dying and being in pain, he still tries to escape Westview so that he could fix her problems. So that he cold get away from her. So she brought him back, and had children, and just decided that she gets to control them along with the whole town??? I’m sorry but the show literally made her a terrible partner, mom, and avenger. And here’s the thing. I don’t think she’s evil, and I sympathized a lot with her. But she just got worse. 

So not only did she willingly keep a whole town hostage (where everyone was suffering and separated from their families and children literally stayed asleep which means they were in a constant state of seeing her nightmares) but this woman got scared and angry when Agatha freed them. She’s like “I kept you safe.” Wanda literally would’ve kept them in that prison if Aatha had never arrived. She wouldn’t have cared about them. Like Agnes said, heroes don’t do that. 

And then there’s her treatment of Monica. Wanda literally tried to kill her multiple times, and Monica only tried to help. Then she doesn’t even apologize in the end. I hated how this show wrote Monica or how they included her. From the Wanda only starts to use her powers when she sees Monica (when literally everyone else is pointing a gun) to how she automatically grabs her and tries to kill her, and then later has the audacity to say “don’t make me hurt you.” And Monica basically being ignored and used just to defend Wanda and prop her up. Like it was just bullshit. The way they treated their only black character. They even had her say she’d do the same. wtf? Even Jimmy Woo, their asian character, was more of a sidekick to Darcy in those episodes and ended up not contributing much. It sucks. 

And as a person who criticizes Tony Stark, it’s really weird how a lot of his haters use the same arguments as his stans when they try to defend Wanda. ‘She has mental illness” “she paid for her mistakes.” No, giving up her family that only existed because of the torture of innocent people doesn’t win you any points. It’s the least she SHOULD’VE done.  

And the thing that bothered me the most is that she never even learned her lesson? Like she took the darkhold and is trying to find a way to bring her kids back. mf, didn’t the entire show and mess start because she accidentally brought back vision? She literally didn’t learn a thing. What grief did she process if she’s just going to go and try to use dark magic to bring them again? 

And then there’s all of Sword. First Maria was killed off, and then Sword was introduced as this thing that’s always existed, yet we’ve never heard of it??

And there’s also Agatha. “Agatha All Along” umm. What exactly did Agatha do all along? The show set her up to be this big bad and then Wanda took her down it was not satisfying at all. Wanda, who doesn’t know how to cast spells, managed to learn a spell and use it without Agatha knowing in 5 seconds? As Agatha was taking her powers? BS. And then I hated Wanda’s plan. She decided to take her back to the past for what? Agatha’s own family to kill her? And then  later she traps Agatha into her nosy neighbor counterpart? And I’m supposed to go, “what a hero’? 

Obviously Agatha isn’t a good person, but the entire mess happened because of Wanda. It felt wrong for her to use the same prison on innocent people on another person and it be celebrated. And then there’s the whole “They’ll never know what you sacrificed for them line” i literally lost all sympathy for that character after that. 

And I still don’t understand the romance between Wanda and Vision. I can’t get over the fact that he’s a robot. All in all, there are many aspects of the show that I didn’t like, but the number one reason is that it completely ruined her character. There was so much potential. But no. First they changed her age. “it was never said that she was a teenager.” Hawkeye literally said “if you want to go to high school.” no one says that to a 27 year old. Maybe he meant it as something else but in aou, he was the one to form the closest bonds with her and Pietro and it was the same movie that showed us that he had kids. it would make sense if it was supposed to be like a “he wants to help them because they’re young and he’s a dad so he knows how to deal with young people. And everyone referred to her as kid, so it just all fit. (also the actress looked  a lot younger in aou than in her other works before that movie so the make up department probably tried to make her seem young.) And the way she dressed and acted. 

second, apparently even though aou had us believe that they thought they were signing up to save their country, wandavision literally just went “yeah Wanda knew it was a terrorist organization’ and she didn’t even seem to regret it? 

The show went about the entire situation the wrong way, and really ruined her character. 

[avengerscompound]

It’s You and Me - Chapter 14

It’s You and Me: A Hawkeye Fanfic

Series Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Clint Barton x  F!Reader

Word Count:  2591

Rating: ��E

Warnings:  smut (FM, light d/s, vaginal sex.  Mentions of things like spitting and choking), mentions of ptsd

Synopsis: You and Clint Barton go way back.  Since you joined the circus as a child, he took it upon himself to keep you away from the people who really wanted to hurt you.  For years the two of you danced a line between dark and light.

When he chooses light the two of you go your separate ways.

Fifteen years later he tracks you down.  Those feelings the two of you shared never went away, but now he is not only an Avengers but a single father.  Can the two of you make it work after all this time when your lives have gone in such different directions?

A series told in flashbacks and current day.

Chapter 14: Then

Clint kept close to you as the two of you crawled through the ventilation shaft.  He was pressing himself so close to you and while he was sure he wasn’t breathing that heavily, every time he inhaled he was sure he was going to set off some kind of alarm.

It was stupid really.  Yeah, he’d always tried to avoid all the underground shit with the circus, but that didn’t mean he’d been able to avoid all of it.  He’d broken into a few houses and once helped them hold up a bank.  It wasn’t something he was particularly proud of, but it was something he was good at.

This job would be the first big hit for the two of you.  Pulling it off meant that you could pay the rent in an actual apartment upfront for about three months and buy new equipment.  It would mean that for a while all the two of you would have to worry about was each other and the show.  And who knew?  Maybe he’d be discovered and never have to do this again.

“You’re sure that they’re bad dudes?”  Clint whispered.  It was a question he’d asked a lot.  You’d been planning this job, but he’d set some rules.  The main one was not hurting innocent people.

You sighed.  It was the kind of sigh that was reserved for people whose patience was being tested.  The ones that wanted to remain calm but were getting a little sick of repeating themselves.  He was used to hearing it - well from everyone really - and he had asked that exact question a lot.  “I promise,” you said.  “They import drugs and… people from what I can tell.  All these stores are just fronts.”  You turned back to look at him.  You looked completely calm considering where you were.  He on the other hand had sweat clinging to his brow that was furrowed with worry.  “Besides, what we’re taking… they probably won’t even notice.”

“I’m worried about that probably,” Clint said.  The absolute last thing he wanted now was to be hunted down by some drug cartel.

“Well, they definitely won’t know it was us,” you added.  “There’s zero connection.  And I’m really good.”

He nodded and you continued through the vents.  When you reached the room you seemed to be looking for, he shifted the grill out of the way so you could peer down.  The room was very dark - the only real light coming in through the cracks in the door and curtain.  “Okay,” you whispered.  “Make sure you’re ready to pull me back up.”

He nodded and helped lower you carefully to the ground.  This wasn’t one of those break-and-enters like you see in the movies.  There was no laser grid for you to somersault through and no pressure pads on the ground.  From the intel you’d gotten, the safe was just the old turn and click type.

Still - watching you move through the room was like watching art.  You were light on your feet and you moved silently through the room.  You went straight to the painting on the wall and after quickly checking it for tripwire you moved it back and began working on the safe.  You held a small device up to it and pressed your ear against it as you turned the dial on the safe.

It clicked open and you began putting wads of cash into your bag and taking wads of paper out of your bag and pushing them up the back.  You’d had the idea to not empty the safe and to try to make it look like nothing had been removed.  The money inside was still waiting to be laundered and who knew when they’d even get to the stuff in the back.  By then, all the security footage of tonight would have been overwritten and they wouldn’t even know to look for someone the vague size and shape as you, let alone you specifically.

When you seemed happy, you closed the safe and relocked it.  You carefully slid the painting back in place and returned to the vent.  Clint reached down and grabbed your arm and you pulled yourself gracefully back up, closing the grate behind you.  “Alright, not totally out of the woods.  Now to get out of here.”

Clint nodded and the two of you carefully but quickly returned from the way you came, first heading through the vents to the elevator shaft, and then out through the service tunnels, avoiding detection from the security guards on duty.

It was surprisingly easy.  Clint had been working at this kind of thing his whole life and you seemed to have a second sense for avoiding people.  When you were finally well away from the building, you both took off your balaclavas and gloves, and shoved them in your pockets before getting on the first bus you could find.  Neither of you said a thing for the whole trip home.  And it was a long one.  Not just because you had decided to hit a business nowhere near your usual haunts, but because the bus you’d gotten on went in the wrong direction, and you’d both needed to get out and double back, this time flagging down a cab and dishing out the seventy bucks it had cost you in cab fare.

Clint was buzzing on adrenalin as the two of you ran upstairs into the room you shared in the hostel and when he finally locked the door behind you the two of you couldn’t contain your excitement anymore.  He turned to see you staring at him and at once the two of you squealed.  “Oh my god!”  You yelped, running at him and wrapping your arms around his neck.  He circled his arms around your waist and pulled you close, kissing you deeply - completely caught up in the excitement of it.

When you pulled back you looked at him with your eyes twinkling.  “Let’s see what we got.”

He nodded and you grabbed your backpack and dumped the contents on the bed.  Along with the rope, lockpicks, and flashlight wads and wads of cash fell out in a pile.  You moved everything that wasn’t cash off the bed as Clint picked up one of the wads and flicked his fingers through it.  “Holy shit,” he said.  “I thought we’d get ten grand.  There has to be at least fifty here.”

You sat down on the bed and began to unbundle it.  “Clint,” you said looking up at him.  “Let’s leave.  We have enough to go to New York.  We can do our show there.”

“You don’t wanna stay here?”  He asked.

You shrugged.  “I don’t mind too much.  Just… in case … you know?”

“Aww, man.  But there’s In and Out Burger here,” Clint whined.

“There’s good pizza in New York,” you said grabbing his belt and tugging him closer to you.

“Hmm…” he mused.  “You do have a point.”

You looked up at him and began to unbuckle his belt.  “You know what I think we should do first?”

“I think I have a slight idea,” he teased.

The two of you still hadn’t had sex.  You were getting closer but you’d often end up shying away when things got too hot and heavy.  Clint didn’t mind being patient though.  He loved sex, but he wasn’t above jacking off in the shower if it meant you weren’t rushing into something you weren’t ready for.   If it took rolling around in a big pile of cash for you to get there, he was down for it.

“We should get food delivered.  Something fresh,” you said.  “Sushi.  And tacos.”

“Sounds good, sugar,” he said as you pushed his pants down.  “Do I need to be pantsless for that?”

“After, silly,” you said, pulling your shirt off and flopping back on the bed.  You grabbed one of the bundles of cash and threw them up into the air, giggling excitedly as the bills floated down around you.

Clint smiled as he watched you and grabbed the waistband of your pants and dragged them down, nearly pulling you off the bed with them.  You squealed and braced your foot on his chest to keep you on the bed and grabbed more of the money to throw above you all.

“You’re having way too much fun there,” Clint teased, pulling off his shirt.

“Get down here will you!”  You said and dragged him down on top of you.

Clint kissed you hungrily, grinding down on you as the two of you rolled around in the bed.  His cock hardened and pressed against you through the fabric of his underwear.  He could feel your wetness seeping through your underwear and onto his cock.

He wanted you but kept his expectations low.  He knew how hard this was for you and he knew if he started to expect anything, it would make you feel like there was something wrong with you.

You wrapped your leg around his waist and pulled him closer to you.  Clint rolled you, so you were pressed down on top of him and broke the kiss.  “You’re in charge,” he whispered.

You looked down at him, startled at first, and slowly you ran your tongue over your lips.  “Yeah?”  You asked.

“Yeah,” Clint said.  “I’m all yours.  You can do whatever you want with me.”

You slowly caressed your hands down his chest as you seemed to consider what that meant and if you liked it.  A smile gradually spread over your face and you pushed his hands up over his head.  “Yeah,” you said and he wrapped his fingers around the head of the bed.  “I’m in charge.”

You began to grind down on his cock as you looked into his eyes.  He didn’t fight you - he just gazed up at you, rolling his hips to add to the friction against your cunt.  Your eyes were darkened with lust and you moved one hand down pushing his pants down enough to free his cock and wrapping your fingers around it.  The other hand you kept pressed on his wrists.  He wasn’t sure if having his hands trapped made you feel more comfortable, or if it was just a turn-on for you to have him helpless for you, but he played along regardless.  If he was being honest with himself, he was really into it.  He loved seeing you take control.  He loved submitting to you.  His cock jumped and began to leak down his shaft and over your knuckles.

“God you look sexy like this,” you hummed as you jerked him off.  “Like you’re mine.”

“I am,” he groaned, bucking up under you.  “All yours.”

You hummed and ran your fingers over his hand, closing them around the frame of the bedhead.  “Keep your hands right there.  Don’t make me tie you up.”

“Yes, ma’am,” Clint said quickly, though the idea of you tying him down was a turn-on in itself.  You had the rope to do it right there.

You got off him and pulled his pants all the way off and removed the rest of your clothes before grabbing a condom from the packet he kept in the side table that had thus far not been used.  You placed it on his chest, obviously not quite ready for it, but wanting it nearby.  Clint groaned and hoped that it was a sign that this was working for you in a way that nothing else had done.

Straddling his lap again, you brushed your thumb over his lips and pushed it into his mouth.  He sucked on it, moaning softly as your soaking cunt began to slide up and down his shaft, coating it in your arousal.  As you watched him sucking on your thumb you began to finger your clit, making yourself wetter if it was at all possible.  His cock ached to enter you and pulsed under your hot core.

You pulled your thumb from his mouth and gripped his chin, forcing him to look up into your eyes.  ‘Thank you,’ you mouthed, and let him go, grabbing the condom and tearing it open, before carefully rolling it down his length.  He held his breath as you wrapped your fingers around his shaft once more and painfully slowly you guided him inside you.

Your face was screwed up in concentration, but Clint couldn’t tear his eyes away from his cock and the way it slowly disappeared inside you, your hot walls clamping down around it.  “Fuck,” he groaned.  “Fuck you’re sexy.”

You smiled a little but didn’t say anything.  Clint’s instinct was to reach up and cradle your jaw and make sure you were okay.  He didn’t move though.  He kept his hands on the bed head and he held his body still, waiting for you to decide if you were okay with this or not.

“We can stop,” he assured you.  “You’re in control.”

You took a deep breath in and exhaled slowly.  “You feel so good inside me,” you hummed.  “Fuck, Clint.”

He smiled and arched his back a little, pushing himself deeper into you.  You gasped and let out a long moan before starting to bounce.

You started slowly, just testing out how it felt and what you liked, but it wasn’t long until you were leaning over him and riding him like you were competing in a race.  You returned one hand to his wrists, and the other went to his throat.  He couldn’t help but picture you getting rough with him.  Slapping his face, spitting in his mouth, having your fingers tighten around his throat until he couldn’t pull in air and just when he was starting to worry them relaxing again.  The images only served to turn him on more, and he wondered if you might want to try those things at some point.  He wanted to try it all with you.

He began to buck his hips up under you erratically as he got closer to his release.  You seemed to sense his climax and you shook your head.  “Hold it,” you warned and began to rub your clit fast as you bounced on his cock.

Clint grit his teeth, willing himself to hold back.  Your cunt began to pulse and flutter and you threw your head back, your eyes closed and your lips parted as your orgasm it's poised to hit.  He bucked up under you, making your body slap against his, and with a loud cry you came, your whole body quaking with it.

He groaned and his hips began to stutter as he held himself back.  “Oh god,” he begged.  “Please, sugar.  I’m gonna…”

“Come for me, Clint,” you moan.  “I want to feel it.”

He jerked up hard into you with a grunt, coming as he fully seated himself inside you.  “Fuck,” he groaned.

You let his arms go, and he took it as permission to move them.  He wrapped you in his arms and rolled onto his side as he held you close.  “You okay?”  He asked.

“Yes,” you whispered, your voice shaking a little.  “I was starting to think I’d never be okay with that.  Thank you.”

He shook his head and nuzzled at your cheek.  “There’s nothing to thank me for.”

You looked like you were going to argue but instead, you slipped off his cock and nuzzled into him.  “I feel some way about you, Clint,” you whispered.

He chuckled.  “I feel some way about you too,” he replied, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

// NEXT

[jewels2876]

Always. - A LOKI finale synopsis

So I thought I could write something magical or be inspired by the Loki finale for @the-th-horniest-book-club as it's their last day of celebration.

And it hit me. I can't.

Here's what I can do: dissect this episode down to its heartbreaking ending because at the end I still have a million questions and it's gonna take a cartoon What If?, a Spiderman movie, maybe a Hawkeye show?, and a Dr. Strange movie to answer them all and I'll STILL have questions after that.

Consider for just a moment what happened to 2012 Loki when the TVA captured him way back in Episode One - what the hell did removing Loki do to the MCU timeline? Thor: The Dark World never happened. And no I don't mean you can pretend Marvel put it out there because they did, and it's one of the worst Marvel movies, there I said it. But if TWD didn't happen, what else could have been affected?

And with that disturbing thought we begin...

The opening credits HAVE AUDIO! Every tag line uttered as the characters flash on the screen, EVEN LOKI gets his "We have a Hulk" in. It is awesome; it is glorious; it is expected with EVERY Marvel creation going forward.

Loki and Sylvie should know better than to stare at a door; they always seem to open on their own when that happens. Miss Minutes pops up out of nowhere, scaring the bejesus out of 70% of people, the other 30% wanted to see her one last time. And she's not the same Miss Minutes we first met. She's edgy, she's less peppy, and she gives our duo an offer. Honestly, she should have known the result but 🤷🏻‍♀️

Ravonna is doing something in her office; if she's cleaning it's a piss poor job. Miss Minutes shows up and tells Ravonna she gave her what she needs. Ominous.

Back to Loki and Sylvie who finally meet "He Who Remains." Now we all know guys with names like "He Who Must Not Be Named" are bad news. Guys, to answer the question asked in the show, I'm a little disappointed. The disappointment lasts about five seconds... The office they get transported to reminds me IMMEDIATELY of a certain movie and certain buildings we've seen before (insert duh at this point because you too have seen every Marvel movie ever.)

****** Side note: anyone know if Tom takes his tea with only two sugars? No? Yes? Okay getting back to other things ******

At this point, we get back to Ravonna and her lack of cleaning when Mobius shows up with the pruner (it has to have a cooler name! side side note: nope just glowing batons) and we get a nice little flashback to Original Ravonna (maybe?)

****** 2nd side note: since when did everyone who's not a Russo brother start using OHIO for origin stories? Seriously, go watch Black Widow. I'll wait.******

Now back to Loki, Sylvie, and He Who Remains, hereto known as HWR, who pulls the same trick we saw in the first episode with the "read and sign" guy with the adorable kitten. HWR needs a kitten, a pet at the very least. "You can't get to the end until you've been changed by the journey." HWR s is winding up for a pitch and also summarizes the show too. Loki asks if it's a manipulation; HWR finds the word interesting and I do to. Here's why:

Odin manipulated Loki's abandonment to his advantage

Thanos put Loki under mind control and used him

This is the 2012 Loki as a reminder, so he hasn't been subjected to imprisonment on Asgard or the brotherly banter/squabbles he and Thor have escaping Asgard, nor “Get help” from Ragnarok so it should come as no shock that Loki looks angry. After all, Odin and Thanos kind of killed any hope in Loki of feeling wanted or needed. Aren’t father figures supposed to instill hope, instead of disgust? Yeah, I can answer that one but that’d be an entire other post.

Now we’re back to Ravonna and Mobius and they spat over who was more betrayed - news flash: it was Mobius. But Ravonna has to do for the digs. “Those variants?” “You threw it away for a couple of Lokis.”  Mobius tries to reason with Ravonna, sounding exactly like Glenda and Elphaba from Wicked (his “together” is spot on Glenda!) Ravonna opens a portal looking for “free will” after giving Mobius one last beatdown.

And we’re back to Loki, Sylvie and HWR. HWR gives them a bit of his backstory; I have a suspicion he’s glossed over some of it (he admits being called a conqueror for cryin’ out loud!) He has a maniacal moment, standing on his desk, voice getting a little shrill and thin. He also admits he’s probably the saner of his variants (my words not his.) Then after his real-man-behind-the-curtain routine he makes them an offer. Take his place. Loki, who has been remarkably non verbal, asks why HWR would give up control. Good question from the guy who wants to be in control yet was meant to thrive on chaos he creates. If anyone is keeping score, questions have been asked but not a single ANSWER has been given! Sylvie isn’t believing a single word while our Loki’s wheels are turning.

****** 3rd side note: the acting has been PHENOMENAL this entire series. Forget what Marvel promised and didn’t deliver (fluid Loki) and a scene we’ll be getting to, Tom and company have been nothing short of an Emmy, which I expect next year.******

HWR finally gets fed up with Sylvie and tells her to grow up. Because she took her pruning personally. Now I’m not going to say she shouldn’t be upset about her pruning; Marvel made it A POINT of showing her playing, content on Asgard, when they took her. But HWR has a point. He’s offering an option that allows Loki and Sylvie to do whatever they feel is best and it’s the wrong time for Sylvie to get in her feelings. Of course 99% of us know that’s EXACTLY when feelings choose to surface.

Then something happens - we don’t know who or what did it. Was it Ravonna and her leaving? Did Ravonna meet someone we suspect? Was it Mobius? Miss Minutes? The agents? We may never know exactly but now HWR is actually in the dark. Mr. Know-It-All suddenly doesn’t know it all.

Sylvie thinks she has her opportunity to fulfil her quest but it’s our Loki who protects HWR. Loki doesn’t tell her she’s wrong or right, just to stop and THINK. And now we get a glimpse of 2018 Loki:

See the bigger picture

Let’s talk about it

I believe HWR

What fills the void of a dictator?

What if we unleash something worse than HWR?

Now here’s where Marvel gets an B+ in character development. They took the 2012 Loki hell bent on destroying Earth to rule it and gave him just enough growth to become the 2018 redeemed Loki ODINSON, willing to sacrifice himself to Thanos (even if he did think he wouldn’t die.) It’s not a perfect arc by any means, but Marvel got there and this is one thing I applaud.

Sylvie now thinks Loki is lying to her to get to a throne and is clearly upset they are not seeing eye to eye on this and another point to Marvel. Loki, for only seeing a few videos that Mobius showed him, still has more life experience in his SINGULAR moment with Thanos to know that there is ALWAYS something bigger, badder, WORSE around the corner and he does NOT want to make the wrong decision. Wow.

To trust or not to trust. 

It’s a beautiful sword fight that HWR sits back and watches like it’s ESPN. The lighting is gorgeous behind the action and is leading up to my next OMG moment: STOP.

Loki asks Sylvie to stop, almost like a child. Like someone who knows exactly where the fight leads, where it goes, and where it ends. And he says as much to her as well. Sylvie feels like that person who just wants the fight to be over; she hunches into Tom’s space and the lighting suddenly stays green and blue. Guess who’s green? Guess who is blue?

This goes back to my Emmy mention. Even if it’s ONLY for technical work, it’s so deserving. Sylvie, in green, tired, emotional, struggling with something we aren’t supposed to know just yet. Loki, in blue, almost as if his Jotun form has taken over, strong, sensible, relatable, empathetic.

And then that damn kiss!  Marvel missed another opportunity here. Two Lokis had the opportunity to show self-love, familial love, friendly love, ANYTHING BUT A DAMN KISS!!! I’m not saying they couldn’t have feelings for each other, but it NEVER has to be romantic just because it’s a guy and a girl. **dramatic sigh goes here**

Sylvie pushes Loki through a portal she has opened, then turns to stab HWR through the chest, as he predicted. HWR actually chuckles, which makes me wonder if he expected this exact turn of events. As if we’ll ever know for sure.

Of course the timeline is going nebular and we’re treated to a shot back to the TVA. Mobius and B-15 exchange words as they watch the timelines grow and grow. Loki is sitting on a couch at the TVA and decides he’s not done? You’re supposed to guess the motivation because everything seems normal at the TVA. Loki finds Mobius and B-15 and admits to everything. Loki calling HWR terrifying is terrifying all on is own. And this of course is where it ends.

The post credit scene is just a “Loki returns in Season Two.”

Guys, this season was a mixed bag. There was some good, there was some not so good; there were laughs and a couple of tears. But it also has me SO HYPED for what’s to come. More Loki, more Marvel content, more... everything, I hope!

[purpleyellow]

Kunfusion

NCT 22nd member / Dream 8th member

Bee’s Masterlist

“She only wanted to buy milk”

a/n: This post is a mess lmao. Don’t be shy and interact a little, ask box is always open. Any kind of feedback will be very appreciated💛

Bee stopped on her tracks as she turned around the corner to get to the dorm. In front of the building stood approximately eight teenagers and adults, all shamelessly carrying cameras and watching the entrance of the building with hawkeyes.

The girl felt her stomach drop a little as she realized she couldn’t go back to the dorms, even though it was only seven in the morning and all she had done was leave to the grocery store because they were out of milk. 

She could pray no one would notice her underneath the big yellow hoodie and walk towards the building, but she decided it wouldn’t be very smart of her part to do so. Fixing the black mask on her face she turned around and started walking the way she had just come from. 

“Where can I go? Where can I go?” She mumbled nervously to herself while walking towards the park since she thought it was a safer place for her to stay at. The whole breach of privacy always made her anxiety levels through the roof and was a huge pain to deal with.

There was this whole uncertainty that every encounter brought since there were the ones who had an obsessive amount of “love” for the girl, while the majority of them absolutely despised her for being on NCT. 

Remembering about Chenle, she decided to call him and see if she could go stay in his house until they had to go to the day’s schedule.

“Hey, are you home?” She said as he picked up.

“No, I’m at the WayV dorm, why?”

“At seven o clock?” She frowned even though he couldn’t see her.

“Yeah, why? Do you need to borrow something? I can ask my mom to drop it off for you” His voice was a little muffled and she could hear someone asking him who he was talking to.

“No, it’s just those weirdos are blocking the building entrance again and I can’t go back inside, so I was going to ask you if I could stay with you”

“Come here then,” He said and she could hear some moving around “I’m looking out of the window and the coast seems to be clear. I’ll go down with Kun Ge so we can wait for you at the entrance in case someone shows up”

Chenle hangs up without an answer, making Bee let out a sigh before walking towards the WayV dorm. Thankfully, she wouldn’t have to pass anywhere close to the building she lived in to get there.

Going around the corner to the building, she could see Kun and Chenle standing in front of the glass doors and she did a final sprint to where they were.

“What are you doing at this time by yourself on the street?” Kun said urging her inside and tidying up her bangs from the little run she had done.

“We were out of milk” She held up the grocery bag a smile, making his annoyed face soften a little. “Thanks for letting me stay here”

“It’s okay dummy” Chenle smirked as if he actually lived there, which by the way, the girl was still confused about.

“What are you doing here again?” She tilted her head to the side and the boy shrugged as the elevator went up.

“None of your business,” He said waiting for the doors to open, and walking out of the metal box instantly. Looking at Kun for him to explain to her, he just placed an arm around her shoulders and escorted her towards the apartment.

“Don’t look at me, he just showed up here without saying anything”

Walking inside, Chele let his body drop on the couch as she walked inside bidding good morning to the members in the kitchen.

“How did you know we were out of milk?” Ten said after giving her a hug and taking the bag from her arm. Bee thought about telling him the truth, but she doubted she would go back to the Dream dorm anytime soon, so she just rolled with it and moved on to talk to WinWin.

Giving the sleepy boy a high five, she sat on the counter next to him as Kun placed a cereal bowl, made with the milk she had bought, in front of her.

“Where are the pets?” She said after chewing a little bit of food and as if on cue Louis, one of the cats, jumped on the counter, moving towards her sprawled out arm and placing its head under it for her to pat him.

“You asked if you could stay with me but you’re not giving me any attention!” Chenle whinned from the couch making the girl roll her eyes.

“I didn’t have time to eat this morning, do you really want me to starve?” she resumed eating her bowl and the boy got up from where he was laying and sat on her other side.

Finishing his meal, Sicheng picked up his dishes leaving them in the sink and going to his room after giving Chenle a fist bump.

Looking around to see if anyone was paying attention to them, to which the answer was no because Kun was doing the dishes and Ten had also gone back to his room, Chenle put a hand on the girl’s shoulder and she looks over at him, cheeks full of cereal.

“I had a fight with Jisung,” he said and Bee frowned, cheeks still full with cereal and milk “That’s why I came here, I was heading to the dorms but we fought and I think he’s pissed at me, so I texted Kun and asked if I could pay him a visit”

“Were you the one who started the fight?” she asked in a hushed tone, and when the older boy turned around from the sink she looked back to her bowl like they weren’t talking. 

“I’m going to get ready real quick,” He said to them “I would tell you to make yourselves at home, but I think you already are”

Chenle waited for him to disappear in the hallway telling her the whole story. 

“We were talking on the phone and I was teasing him about the mistake he made yesterday on music bank, so he started telling me to stop, but I thought he was just being Jisung so I kept going anyways, that’s when he exploded at me saying I was a bad friend and I shouldn’t rub things on his face”

“Oh, but you know how Jisung gets picky about his performance and stuff, you should have seen him sulking about saying the wrong line in front of 127” Bee reflected as Chenle listened attentively at her. 

She knew it wasn’t a big deal since the two best friends bickered all the time, and it probably blew out of proportion because Jisung was sensitive over the topic. Still, she knew that Chenle needed to understand that in order for them to go back to normal, he needed to be more attentive over the other’s feelings.

“I think you should apologize” She told him, getting up and washing her bowl “And maybe be there for him more, I get you guys are very playful with each other, but being more verbally supportive might make your bond stronger”

“Okay, I suck at it, but I’ll try” she heard him talking from the same spot he was in “Thanks for hearing me. Who would have thought you would actually be good at giving advice”

“I’m not good usually. But I guess I can relate with Jisung when it comes to things like this” She said turning the faucet off and grabbing a towel to wipe her hands.

The kitchen was uncaracteristcly quiet, so when Bee turned around to see if Chenle was still there, Lucas, who had just walked inside the kitchen, grabbed her by the shoulders and screamed in her ear.

“HOLY BISCUITS LUCAS, WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?” The girl screamed hitting in the shoulder while he hugged her. His and Chenle’s laughs filling her ears as Bee tried to calm down her heartbeat from the scare.

Out of a sudden, YangYang came running from the hallway with a slipper in hands and stood there confused at the commotion. “What happened? Did we get robbed?”

“Nah, she’s just overreacted” Lucas said still laughing, but Bee didn’t know if it was because of her or because of the newcome.

“Oh, okay,” Yangyang said dropping his arm and staring at the three of them. “Why are you two here?”

“Long story” Bee and Chenle said simultaneously and he shrugged, sitting on the counter and asking for Lucas to make him a bowl of cereal, slippers still in hand. 

[intojatp]

when I was your friend (Natasha Romanoff one shot)

I got this idea while listening to when I was your man by bruno mars. this will be more sad, and even though I know this is a Bucky Barnes 'book' this will more revolve around Natasha, leaving the reader heartbroken after her best friend passed away. This also takes place after Tony's death, leaving you to hope he'll take care of Natasha from now on. I hope you enjoy this.

____________________________

It's been weeks since your best friend had passed away, but you truly couldn't seem to get over it. You were sure that this feeling would never go away. You'd always miss her. She left a hole in your heart you didn't know how to fill in again. You were glad you still had most of your amazing friends and your lovely boyfriend, Bucky. They tried everything to cheer you up, and sometimes it actually got easier for a while. But as soon as you entered the room you two used to share, your world came crushing in again. But you know that it could be worse. Without those people in your life you would have definitely ended your life a long time ago. They gave you that kind of strength to keep going with your life, and you had no idea how they did it, but you were glad that they did. Mostly Bucky.

You once again entered your now so quiet and almost empty room. When Natasha was still around it always felt like a party in here. And god, it annoyed you most of the time. But now that she wasn't around anymore, you'd do anything to get this back. But no matter how hard you'd try, she would never come back. And you had to live with that for the rest of your life.

You walked up to the piano you used to share. You didn't play often, mostly because you didn't have time for it anymore. But when you played, you only played for Bucky or Natasha. They would always have to beg you for hours to play, and you'd just get annoyed by them after some time and started playing, hoping they would leave you alone afterwards. You sat down on the bench and put your fingers on the keys. You didn't know if you were ready to play again, but you were hoping it would make you feel closer to her again.

"Are you okay, doll?"

You turned your head to the door, seeing your boyfriend leaning on the door frame. He gave you a soft smile, which you replied. You didn't know how he did it, but just having him close to you lifted your mood most of the time. You were so happy to have him.

'Yes, I am. I wanted to play again.. I was hoping it'd make me feel closer to her again.'

Bucky started walking towards you. He sat down next to you and laid his arm around you. It gave you a feeling of comfort and safety. As long as he was around, you knew you could do anything. Anything was possible for you. And dear, did you know he felt the same way about you.

'I got you, Y/N. I'm with you for the end of life. Whenever you're ready, I'll be there for you.'

You gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek and put your fingers on the keys again. You took a deep breath and started playing, already leaving a smile on Bucky's face.

"Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now

Our song on the radio but it don't sound the same

When our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down

'Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name"

Tears already shot up your eyes. All the memories you had with her in this room, all the late night talks, all the little fights, they all came up. She was here with you from the beginning. She saw how you fell for Bucky, she was the first who found out about you two dating, she listened to you whenever you had an argument with him. She always helped you. She was your rock when things got tough and you were hers. Who would do all of this with you now?

Bucky noticed the tears in your eyes and started rubbing your back. He didn't want to interrupt you, but he somehow wanted to show you that he was there with you, and he would never leave your side again.

"It all just sounds like ooh, ooh, ooh, hoo

Mm, too young, too dumb to realize

That I should have bought you flowers

And held your hand

Should have gave you all my hours

When I had the chance

Go with you to every party 'cause all you wanted to do was dance

Now my baby's dancing

But she's dancing at a better place"

Nat always wanted to go to parties with you, but you were the kind of person who'd rather stay in. You were too scared to meet new people, you always let your social anxiety get to you, even though you didn't want that to happen. Nat always understood, but she sometimes got quite annoyed by this. She would never tell you this though, she knew that it wasn't your fault. But she never had to tell you, you just knew. And you couldn't be mad at her for that.

"My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways

Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life

Now I never, never get to clean up the mess I made, oh

And that haunts me every time I close my eyes"

Shortly before she went on that mission with Hawkeye, you two had a little argument. You should've went on that mission, but since you and Hawkeye never really seemed to get along you wanted to go with Steve, Bruce and Tony. You obviously regretted not going now, it should've been you instead of her. You felt like it was your fault she died, and you'd feel like this for the rest of your life.

Bucky knew how you felt. He'd always tell you that it wasn't your fault, and that it shouldn't have been you. But no matter what he told you, you never believed any of it. Bucky hated that he couldn't change your mind, but he knew he wouldn't stop until you finally believed him. It broke his heart to see how you slowly fell apart, but he couldn't do anything except hoping that one day you'd recover from this. And he'd be there for every step of that way.

"It all just sounds like ooh, ooh, ooh, hoo

Mm, too young, too dumb to realize

That I should have bought you flowers

And held your hand

Should have gave you all my hours

When I had the chance

Go with you to every party 'cause all you wanted to do was dance

Now my baby's dancing

But she's dancing at a better place

Although it hurts

I'll be the first to say that I was wrong

Oh, I know I'm probably much too late

To try and apologize for my mistakes

But I just want you to know

I hope he buys you flowers

I hope he holds your hand

Give you all his hours

When he has the chance

Take you to every party

'Cause I remember how much you loved to dance

Do all the things I should have done

When I was your friend

Do all the things I should have done

When I was your friend"

The only thing that truly gave you hope was that now Tony was with her, and he would definitely take good care of her. You missed him almost just as much as you missed her, but it was still easier on you.

You took your fingers off the piano keys and just sat there for a few seconds. Bucky didn't say anything, he just looked at you to see any kind of reaction on your face. He wanted to be ready for any kind of emotion, he wanted to be there for you, now more than ever.

After a minute or so you couldn't hold it in anymore. You started breaking down right into Bucky's arms. He pulled you closer to him, letting you cry into his chest. He held onto you as much as he could, because if he'd let go you would just fall onto the hard, cold ground beneath the both of you. You have never cried this hard, especially never in front of him. You knew it hurt him every time he'd see you like this, which is why you kept feelings like this away from him as much as possible. But right now, you couldn't do it anymore. You had to let everything out, even if it would hurt him.

And it did hurt Bucky. Holding you in his arms, hearing the hardest sobs he has ever heard, coming from the girl he loved the most in this whole world, ripped his heart in two halves. He also had tears running down his cheeks now, but you couldn't see that, which was kind of relieving to him. He left some kisses on the top of your head, before he slowly got up. He still held you in his arms, but he was too scared to keep sitting like this, because if his arms would get weak, you'd fall. And he didn't want you to get even more hurt. He carefully picked you up in bridal style and carried you into his room. He wanted to get you out of there, you were hurting enough today.

As soon as he got to his bed, he carefully laid you down and rushed right next you. He pulled the covers over the two of you and pulled you closer too him again. You felt his metal arm around your waist, and it gave you the feeling of home. You  buried your head into his chest again, and even though his whole shirt was wet because of your tears, it didn't bother you. But you thought that it might bother him, so you quickly helped him out of it.

'You know, it didn't bother me at all, right?'

You just shook your head in response and bury your head into his now bare chest again. Bucky left some soft kisses on your forehead once again, and he soon realized it might've helped you a little bit. Your sobs quiet down, and before you knew, you fell asleep.

'I know it's hard, doll. But you're not alone. And you'll never be. Im with you 'til the end of the line.'

[iliumheightnights]

From Shadows | Steve Rogers x Male!Reader

Fandom: Marvel

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Male!Reader

Summary: A couple of run-ins with a new vigilante make Steve questions things about himself.

(M/N) watched the masked figures entering the warehouse from where he was perched on top of a building. Some were carrying crates inside. BINGO. When he figured the coast was clear, (M/N) sunk into his shadow letting it cascade down the building and towards the warehouse. The shadow moved its way across the street, over boxes and under benches. When it reached the warehouse it slipped under the door seal, shaping into the silhouette of (M/N) on the inside wall.

The inside of the warehouse was dark. The only light coming from the large windows from the roof. That was okay, it was better for him to work in the dark. The warehouse was packed with crates, some large, some small. There were lots of figures in this warehouse, and he was going to take them all out. Still just a silhouette on the wall, (M/N) made his way to one of the figure’s shadow before pulling out a knife and stabbing the shadow. When the figure’s shadow was lying motionless on the ground he moved on, the figure also left dead on the ground. Ever since he discovered his powers he has used them to his benefit, they made being an assassin even easier. He became a literal shadow.

Continuing his way through the warehouse, henchmen fell one by one. No one even knew he was there. After the last of the henchmen were down, he unphased from his shadow and looked around at his handy work. I did a good job, per usual. Seeing one of the henchmen still alive he walked over and yanked them by their collar. “Where is he?” The henchman chocked on his blood. “Where’s who?” (M/N)’s eye’s furrowed. “Don’t fuck with me! Where’s Rumlow!?” The henchman gave a bloody smile. “You’ll never find him. Hail hydra.” Then they died in (M/N)’s hands. (M/N) threw the body to the ground before letting out a yell.

“Have you ever thought about anger management?”

(M/N) turned around and was greeted to earth’s mightiest. Iron man, captain america, black widow and hawkeye stood before him. “I’ve heard it does wonders.” Iron man clapped back. “I don’t need advice from one of earth's billionaires.” (M/N) started to move towards the door, but iron man got in his way and held up one of his repulsors. “How about this? You come quietly now and maybe you’ll get a nice jail cell for good behavior.” (M/N) lifted his hand to his chin and pretended to think, he looked at the captain and couldn’t help but stare into those blue eyes. “Hhhm counter offer.” Before any of the avengers knew what was happening, he sunk back into his shadow and backed away before making some shadow figures materialize and fight the heroes.

(M/N) could have...should have left right then and there. But he didn’t. He couldn’t help but watch Captain America, a.k.a Steve Rogers, a.k.a america’s ass fight his minions. From where he was he could see the captain moving his shield back and forth and throwing punches, none really landing on his minions. He could also see how great his ass looked in his suit. What? He wasn’t about to pass up the opportunity to admire the captain’s ass. Wanting some more personal time with Steve, (M/N) went to work knocking out the other heroes. It was pretty easy to knock the other’s out, they were distracted by his minions and he was a shadow. All he had to do was land some punches to their shadows and they were out like lights. It honestly felt really good to knock out the avengers just like that, apparently they still needed work. When it was time he materialized in front of Captain Rogers.

“Well well well, look who we have here.”

“You’ll pay for what you did to my team.”

(M/N) faked a pained expression. “But I thought it was always the gentleman that paid on the first date?”

Steve looked taken aback a bit before he focused again. He got into position and raised his shield. (M/N) smirked at the man, he looked so stupid in that onesie. “I really like ya cap, I really do. But I’ll do whatever it takes to stop Hydra, and I won’t let you get in the way.” He took out his knives and positioned himself. Steve’s eyes widened a bit. ‘What do you mean stop Hy-” He was cut off as (M/N) launched himself at the man. Slashing his knives at the man trying to land a hit. Steve hit the assassin in the stomach with his shield, causing him to fly against a wall. Steve watched as (M/N) sank into the wall and formed into just a silhouette. He watched as the silhouette punched his own shadow and felt the impact like he was the shadow. The shadow jumped off the wall and (M/N) launched himself at the captain again. Steve smirked, the assassin was too confident and Steve threw his shield at the man, forcing him to the ground.

(M/N) laid on the ground and let out a groan. That hurt. He should have just kept wailing on the cap’s shadow. Speaking of the cap, the man himself was standing over (M/N). He was smiling as he pulled out some handcuffs. “That was a good fight. But that’s over now.” (M/N) could feel his heart beating faster, then an idea came to him. “Wait! Wait! Let me tell you this about Hydra first!” Steve leaned in closer, was he really this stupid? (M/N) smirked before quickly moving his head closer and kissed him on his lips. Steve’s eyes widened in surprise, he didn’t notice (M/N) grabbing the handcuffs, closing them onto Steve's hands. Quickly changing both him and Steve into shadows, he brought them over to a bar before turning them both back. Steve had been handcuffed to the bar so he couldn’t follow. “Sorry Cap. Wish this could be different but I have work to do and don’t need you to follow me. Thanks for the kiss though, and if I may say you have one amazing ass.” Steve watched as (M/N) turned back into a shadow and left the warehouse. What just happened?

It had only been two days since the run in with (M/N) and Steve couldn’t stop thinking of it. More importantly he couldn’t stop thinking of the kiss. It was just a distraction, he only did that to escape. But the reasoning behind the kiss wasn’t bothering Steve, it was the fact that he enjoyed it. Not only did he like it, he wanted to kiss him again. He shouldn’t think of that, first of all he was a villain and that wouldn’t be good. Secondly, He was a man. Growing up in the 40’s he was told that liking the same sex was wrong,and he knew what other people thought of it. But he always knew he liked men, he was just afraid to admit it. “Hey Capsicle, what’s with the long face?” Ah Tony, he always showed up at the exact time you didn’t want him to. “If you’re still caught up with shadowman don’t be, we’ll get him.” Steve let out a sigh. “You’re right Tony.I was just thinking, times have changed so much.” Steve looked Tony in the eyes. “Tony, what do you think of same sex relationships?” Tony only stared at him, he gulped waiting for the resentment. “Steve, are you serious? Steve, I’m Bi. I’ve slept with just as many men as I have women. I thought this was common knowledge.” Steve remembered he had heard some stories, but he thought they were just jokes or rumors. “Wait...Mr.Rogers. Are you saying you are also into men?” Steve didn’t say anything, only nodded his head. Tony chuckled a bit before shaking his head. “Listen. It’s okay. You’re okay, you’re no different. You’re still the stuck up capsicle that we all know and love.” Steve laughed at that and Tony joined him. “Thanks Tony. I needed to hear that.” Tony patted Steve’s back. “So...who is the lucky man that claims America's ass?”

“We got him.” Steve looked up at Tony in front of him. “Shadow. We lured him into a trap and captured him. He’s in interrogation right now, figured you’d want to be the one to talk to him.” Steve felt his breath hitch, he hadn’t expected for the man to be captured so soon...or at all. Steve nodded at Tony before standing up and making his way to the interrogation room. It was like time was dragging on, he was about to see that man again. The man that made him question everything. He stood in front of the door to the interrogation room for at least five minutes before he was brave enough to enter. When he did his breath was taken away as his eye’s met (M/N)’s. “Hello Captain Rogers, what a coincidence to see you here.” Steve laughed a bit before sitting down in the chair on the other end of the table. He picked up the folder and started reading through the papers. “Name?”

“Bucky Barnes. Oh wait, sorry wrong boyfriend.”

Steve looked at the man with a small frown, (M/N) only smirked. “Last name: (L/N), First name: (M/N). Haven’t had an arrest history before, but something tells me that’s a little off. What you did the other day wasn’t the first time you did that.”

(M/N) nodded his head. “Guilty as charged. I’ve dealt with more than my fair share of Hydra agents before.”

“Why are you wanting to attack Hydra?”

“They’re bad guys, granted I’m not saint myself but they need to pay.”

“Why?”

For the first time, (M/N) looked defeated. “I have my reasons. And I’d rather not share them with an audience.” He nodded towards the wall, which was actually a one way mirror. “I know they’re in there. Watching. Waiting. I always know what goes on in the shadows. Talk to them and give us some privacy and maybe...maybe I’ll tell you.”

Steve sat for a minute looking at (M/N) trying to figure him out. He couldn’t help but look at his lips for just a little longer than he should have. He knew he had to get out of there fast, he was getting too distracted. He used talking to the team as an excuse. “Hurry back honey, don’t want to be late for our date.” Steve felt the blush on his face as he left the room. When he entered the viewing room he was met with Tony and Nat’s grins. “When were you gonna tell me you two were dating?” Suddenly the lights in the interrogation room went out and suddenly came back on, (M/N) however was gone. “Shit, sound the alarm!”

(M/N) was able to get through the base pretty easily in shadow form, man...these people needed better security. It wasn’t long before he found himself at a good enough place in the base to escape. “What? No ass compliments this time?” (M/N) raised his eyebrow and he turned and faced Steve. “Sorry I was kind of in a rush.” Steve walked closer but had his hands up in surrender. “The camera’s have mysteriously been turned off. Now will you tell me why you hate Hydra?” (M/N) let out a sigh before speaking. “It’s a long and far too complicated story to tell you here and now. Here.” (M/N) conjured up a shadow and pulled out an old phone. “How about I tell you on a date? I’ll text you when and where.” (M/N) turned to leave before he felt a hand on his arm. He turned and before he knew it Steve was kissing him. This wasn’t half bad. He kissed back harder before breaking off. “Don’t worry, I won’t cause too much trouble. See you soon...America’s ass.” With that (M/N) slunk back into the shadows and escaped the avengers base. All Steve could think was, I’m in love.

[too-gay-for-marvel]

i want to come home pt.6

a/n: aight yall, this is the end, the grand finale, the end of the line. this was the start of this blog and yall stuck with me through it and i love yall so much. yall have really been amazing and make writing worth it. i hope in the future i can continue to write things yall enjoy. now lets finish this thing

a/n pt 2: i also wasnt gonna post this till thursday but i just remembered today is my bday so this is my gift to yall because i would die for yall. dont @ me for forgetting my bday

Word Count: 2738

Warnings: Mason being an adorable little asshole

Pairing: Natasha x Reader

(pt.1 pt.2 pt.3 pt.4 pt.5 pt.6)

I can do this, you think as you decide to take the stairs up to your 9th floor apartment. She’s just a kid.

My kid.

It shouldn’t bother you as much as it does. You’ve co-parented Mason for five years. You literally grew her and pushed her out of your body. So why were you so nervous to have to parent her alone for a few days?

Because you’re not okay, your mind tells you, but you ignore it. You’re fine. Everything is fine.

You want to run away, but it’s fine.

And as you open the door to your apartment and see Mason drawing, you don’t want to run away anymore. You haven’t gotten to spend alone time with her since- well, it doesn’t matter. You missed hanging out with her and having some alone time.

So you make the best of it.

It’s not as bad as you thought it would be. She helps you make meals. Well, she bosses you around (like her mother, you think) while you do the work. You play, you watch movies, you have sleepovers. One night you even made a fort.

“What’s the password?” Mason questions you from her spot in the fort.

The very same fort you built and she kicked you out of.

“I love you,” you offer.

“No! Try again,” she giggles. “I love you, too,” she quickly whispers after only a moment’s hesitation. Much better.

“I have pizza,” you offer again. She sticks her head out just enough to catch you in your lie before hiding once again.

“Mommy is a better liar.”

Well, she’s got you there.

“Is it…” you look around, hoping to find some clue as to what the password could be. In truth, you think she’s just making it up as she goes. She spends enough time with Nat that it wouldn’t surprise you.

“Hurry hurry!”

“I need a hint,” you practically beg, really trying to ham it up. “Pretty please?” Mason may be just like Nat, but she has a few of your qualities.

One of which is that she’s a sucker.

“I’ll make a deal,” Mason says as she sticks her little hand out of the fort. “Pay the entrance fee.”

Where did she even learn this shit?

“Name your price.”

“10 pieces of chocolate,” she says while wiggling tiny, always sticky fingers.

“That’s too high, three,” you counter.

“Nine.”

“Two.”

“You’re going the wrong way!” Mason giggles and finally sticks her head out of the fort.

“I’ll give you five,” you tease as you lean forward and touch your forehead to hers, scrunching your nose when she laughs even harder. “Take it or leave it.”

“No deal!” She practically screams, and you flinch back from the noise.

The scream of metal twisting in ways it shouldn’t. The team in your ears, your own screams deafening as you-

“-Momma?”

Your eyes shoot open and you look into Mason’s green ones, and you’re home again. Not on the mission, not trapped, just home. Your daughter is right there, looking at you, and you just have to reach out and touch her.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. It’s not enough. You know it’s not enough.

“It’s okay,” she says softly before leaning forward and giving you a sticky kiss on the forehead. It’s gross. You love it.

You’re okay. You’re fine. You have to be fine.

Natasha is set to return on a Sunday. Mason had woken up early, far too early for anyone to wake up on a Sunday, but she wanted to get started on breakfast. We can’t let mommy come home to no breakfast, can we? Yes. Yes you can.

But you get up anyway and let your daughter boss you around about what breakfast should be made: eggs, toast, pancakes, waffles, bacon, oatmeal, coffee, tea, chocolate milk, the list goes on. It’s as if she thinks Nat has never had breakfast in her life. You both know Nat only ever just eats fruit.

Hell, Mason even put the leftover Thai food out.

She was definitely Nat’s child.

You’re desperately trying to listen to Mason talk about her dreams while also not getting distracted and burning the bacon when someone knocks at the door. Who would be knocking so early?

Nat had a key.

Before you can stop her, Mason runs to the door calling for Nat. You don’t think she’s old enough to understand your wife can get in if she wants. It’s a rush to move the bacon and turn the stove off so you can stop Mason from opening the door for a possible stranger.

“Uncle Nick!” Mason cries, and you can hear her giggling.

And you hear your heart stop.

Nick doesn’t come over unannounced.

You aren’t sure if you want to go greet him at the door. Nothing good comes from unannounced visits, especially not from Nick. Who does he think he is to show up when he knows Nat is away on a mission.

She’s on a mission. She’s fine. You’re fine.

“Don’t say it,” you whisper when you make it to the kitchen entry and see Nick holding Mason.

“Say what?” He asks, looking straight at you.

“Don’t,” you say even quieter, if it was even possible.

“Is mommy home?” Mason asks, and you give Nick a look. A look that says you’ll kill him if he tells your daughter that something happened to Nat.

Nothing happened to Nat. She’s fine. You’re fine.

“It’ll be a little longer, kid,” Nick says. “But she sent you a gift.”

He puts her down and hands her a small box of chocolates that he got from his pocket. Mason cheers and runs off to the kitchen to open the box. Her sweet tooth was too big for her to ask if they wanted a piece.

“Y/N-”

“I said don’t, Nick,” you say, more forceful now that Mason is slightly out of earshot.

“She’s fine,” Nick says. He reaches out to you but you step back. “It’s safer to extend the mission than to pull her out now.”

She’s fine. You’re fine. Everything is fine.

“You would tell me,” you shoot back. “Right?”

“I would tell you,” he confirms, and you nod and invite him to breakfast.

He wouldn’t lie. He couldn’t lie.

What was supposed to be a short, few day mission ends up going past two months. In that time you have to manage taking care of Mason, getting her to school, doing your work, training agents. You worry about Nat the whole time and feel on edge every time someone comes up to you at work.

Maybe that’s how Nat felt when you died. But you were fine.

Maybe throughout the time, when Mason can’t see, you break down. Maybe you cry in the shower because you’re scared and the water agitates your cybernetics that Tony says are flawless. And maybe you can’t sleep because you have nightmares, about dying, about Nat, about Mason.

But you’re okay. You’re fine.

And you’re absolutely fine when Mason says she doesn’t feel good and asks if she can go to work with you.

That’s fine, too.

You know she’s lying. She always bites her lip when she lies. But she’s your daughter; if she asked you to steal the moon, you would do it. So you help her pack a day bag and get her in the car.

When you look in the rear view mirror, you can see her practically bouncing in her seat. At least she’s happy.

Her purple Hawkeye backpack is bigger than she is when she puts it on. You have to fake a cough to hide the laughter as you reach out for her to hold your hand. She grabs it eagerly and you both walk into the Compound and head to your office.

It’s nothing fancy, just a small office. As a “higher up,” you at least get a semi-private office, but it still made you claustrophobic. Not that it mattered because you were fine. And you were even more fine when Mason sat at the little desk you had against a wall.

A desk just for her.

You know she’s going to cause trouble. You can feel it in your bones. She’s too quiet while you fill out paperwork, and every now and then you hear her giggle. But when you look over at her, she’s just colouring.

Why was she so suspicious?

“Hey boss,” you hear, and you look over to see Luke standing in the doorway. “Hey Little Boss,” he says soon after with a wink at Mason.

“Hi, Uncle Luke!” Mason calls and tries to wink back, but she used both eyes. Well. It’s the thought that counts.

“Need something?” You asked as you leaned back in your chair, trying not to groan as your skin stretched over the augmentations.

You were fine.

“Mind if I take Little Boss with me on a few errands?” He asks. The way Mason practically jumps up leads to more suspicion.

But you see her smile, and how can you tell her “no?”

“Please don’t teach my daughter bad things,” you plead, but you know it’s useless. She was raised around the Avengers, after all.

“I’ll keep him out of trouble,” Mason says with a serious look on her face. You gesture for her to come closer and give her a quick kiss on the head before shooing the both of them out of your office.

And once they’re gone, all hell breaks loose and everyone knows it’s your fault.

It starts when Tony stops by your office only half an hour after Mason and Luke ran off. You didn’t have to ask what happened when you see Tony with damp, pink hair.

“I’m sorry,” you say even though you want to laugh until you can’t breathe.

“She’s evil,” is all he says before walking back out. You can’t argue with him.

The next disaster happens 15 minutes later. You were trying to brew some more coffee to try and fight your nightmare-induced fatigue when you hear someone clear their throat behind you. You have to bite your cheek to keep from smiling.

“New friendship bracelets?” You ask as your eyes land on Bucky’s and Clint’s hands.

“Who gave her handcuffs?” Bucky asks as he holds his wrist up, forcing Clint’s hand to follow.

“Did you ask her?” You shoot back.

“She was too busy running away laughing,” Clint grumbles, but you can see the blush creep up his neck when Bucky’s hand grazes his own.

“You’re handcuffed to an assassin, Clint,” you say softly, “have him pick the lock.”

“We’re not done talking about this,” Clint says as he pulls Bucky away to take care of their problem. Maybe while Bucky picks the lock, they’ll take care of all that sexual tension between them.

It only gets worse as the morning goes on. Two of your agents come up to you with tears in their eyes and donuts in their hands. Apparently the donuts had been filled with mayonnaise.

Bruce comes to your office with his hands stuck to a hand sanitizer bottle. One that was now filled with clear glue instead of sanitizer.

Nick came to you with half an oreo in his hand. An oreo that smelled suspiciously of mint toothpaste.

Your personal favourite was the screams of agents that was soon followed by the overwhelming smell of Febreze. When you looked out your door, four empty, zip-tied Febreze cans were piled outside.

When Mason walked back into your office with a guiltless grin, you wanted to have her explain. You knew you should tell her that she can’t just prank everyone at work just because she wanted to.

But it made the day… interesting.

What harm was there in a few little pranks, right?

“Don’t tell me about it,” you say as you hand her the sandwich you had made for lunch. “I need to be able to claim plausible deniability.”

“What’s that?” Mason asks as she scrunches her nose and takes a bite of her sandwich.

“It means I can keep you out of trouble,” you tease before kissing her scrunched nose and eating your own sandwich.

You teased each other as you munched on your small lunch. Sometimes you would steal a chip from her pile, other times she would reach over and “steal” a bite of your sandwich. At one point she ended up tossing grapes at you and laughing when you couldn’t catch them.

It was just… mundane. You were okay.

“Busy?”

Both you and Mason turn to the door to see Maria standing there, arms crossed over her chest. As usual. She looks as professional as always and you can definitely see why Nat used to have a crush on her.

“Hi, Auntie M,” Mason says around a mouthful of sandwich.

“Hi, Little M,” Maria shoots back with a small smile.

“Whatcha need?” You ask as you set the last few bites of your sandwich down and wipe your hands off on a napkin. Normally you would use your pants, but Mason doesn’t need to learn that habit.

“Nat’s jet is landing soon,” Maria says. She keeps eye contact with you. It’s comforting.

“Mommy’s home?” Mason asks. She drops her sandwich when she stands up and rushes out the door as your heart races.

“Mason wait!” You call and run after her, but she’s got a good start.

You hate when she runs off.

“Mason stop!” You shout after skidding around a corner and seeing Mason still heading toward the hangar. She doesn’t answer you, and she definitely doesn’t stop.

How was she faster than you?

How was she in better shape than you??

You jumped off the stairs to the hangar to try and land in front of Mason, but the landing jars you too much and you groan and fall to your knees. Good as new, you think cynically to yourself, what a load of bullshit. Tony was going to get an earful later.

The jet had already landed and Steve walked out as you managed to push yourself back up to your feet. You’re almost desperate to see Nat, but you feel a million times better when you see Mason jump into your wife’s arms.

She’s okay. You’re okay.

You walk the rest of the way, stopping just far enough away that Nat can’t touch you. It makes you want to cry that you’re worried about touching your own wife. But you’ve hurt her, you died, you can’t just pretend like everything is fine.

Even though it is fine. You’re fine.

Instead you stand there and cross your arms defensively over your chest. At least Mason is happy, and Nat looks happy to be home. They’re both chatting and laughing and smiling and that’s all you want. And you wait patiently until Nat looks up and locks eyes with you.

And it’s like everything around you disappears. You get the same feeling you had when you first saw her, and your palms get sweaty and your mouth is dry. It’s like nothing ever happened, nothing had gone wrong, you were just the happy family you used to be.

But you see that pain in her eyes. There’s a desperation that you only recognise because you’ve seen it in the mirror. And you know you’re going to have to talk about it, and you’re going to have a lot of talks about it. But you can see that she knows it, too.

Maybe that’s a start. But that’s okay. That’s fine.

So you step forward and wrap your arms around the both of them. Nat doesn’t stiffen like she has since you came back. No, this time she melts into you and you swear you hear her whimper, almost inaudibly. So you squeeze them tighter because you won’t hurt them again.

You pull back just enough to look at her, and only then are you so bold. Leaning down enough to kiss her, sighing into the feeling that you had missed more than life itself. That feeling of home.

“Gross,” Mason teases, and you feel Nat smile against your lips before pulling back and giving Mason a kiss on the nose.

“Any after-mission-requests?” You ask, and Nat just looks at you for a moment with teary eyes that she blinks back.

“I want to go home.”

And you both smile.

“Home sounds good.”

[faecaptainofdreams]

I do not own Marvel. Yes, Wade drew this with crayon. Marvel HC: www.deviantart.com/foxdragonlo… Peter HC: www.deviantart.com/foxdragonlo… Wade HC: www.deviantart.com/foxdragonlo… If you don't like this ship i don't care. Don't talk to me about it, find something you do enjoy. If you're into it, then thanks for stopping by! --------------------------------------------------------------------------- TW: strong language, mature themes ~~Humble Start~~ When Peter was 19, he met 25-year-old Wade in January when the merc was teaming up with the Avengers to help him find his target, who happened to be involved in something the Avengers were trying to undo. When the men first shook hands and Peter introduced himself, he removed his mask, to which Wade suddenly replied "Hot DAMN! What are you, a Disney prince?!" Peter, startled, backed away, and Tony urged Peter to put his mask back on. As it was, Spiderman and Deadpool got along. Before they all parted ways (with the problem resolved and Deadpool having gotten his man), the latter thought it might be fun to pop in once in a while and visit the Avengers. While the others drily insisted that he don't do that, Spidey thought Deadpool could be a potentially good friend. Despite Tony's aversion to it, Peter gave Wade his number and suggested they hang out sometime. Wade showed up a couple weeks later after having texted Peter off and on. Still shy about his appearance and preferring to not be seen at a lower profile, he came to the facility wearing fingerless gloves, concealing clothing, and his Deadpool mask. After he and Peter hung out the first couple of times, the younger of them asked if Wade would let him see his face. With lots of self-deprecating jokes, Wade said no. Sometimes Peter would go meet up with Wade and go mess around with him, and soon enough he introduced the assassin to his friends, Ned and MJ. They all talked to each other regularly, forming a tight little friend group. Wade sometimes felt like he didn't belong with them, like he was too old to be their friend, but they all had the same childish sense of humor. And given how intelligent the younger trio was, they felt mature to him. Many times, Wade forgot that he was older, even if it was only by a couple of years. As months passed, the Avengers got used to Wade's presence and didn't take much issue with Peter hanging out with him. It was innocent (although Tony loathed the sex jokes and vulgarity, especially when it was directed at his boy). It was clear that Peter had a vastly different moral compass and a much more sensible head on his shoulders, and was not going to be influenced by Wade's mercenary ways. He was trusted with the friendship. ~~The Crush~~ Wade fancied Peter from the start. The second the mask had come off, Wade was smitten, but he figured it would go away or just stay stagnant. He'd been attracted to and thirsted after people loads of times (hence all his sexual escapades), but he was never the settle-down type. He joked about Peter being attractive and sexy and made all kinds of quips, but given he was so crass by nature, Peter never took it too seriously. He did believe Wade thought he was attractive, but he knew he was like this with multiple people and figured it was harmless. Which it was, but he didn't understand that it was serious. The more Wade stuck around and the more he got to know the Spiderman, the more his feelings grew. He eventually had to face facts and accept that he didn't just like Peter for his body -- he liked his character. The boy was an absolute magnet; bright and sunny, happy, forgiving, generous, kind, merciful, hilarious, intelligent, and non-judgmental. He was the ultimate package. Wade also knew he was bisexual and knew that if he really worked up to it, asking Peter out wasn't out of the question or too far-fetched. What was far-fetched, to his mind, was the idea that Peter would ever say "yes." And even if he did say yes, was that fair to the Ironman's golden child? Wade was a self-sustaining disaster with baggage so heavy even Spiderman couldn't pick it up. As far as he was concerned, it was best to keep his feelings to himself and spare Peter the misery. What he didn't realize was Peter was starting to notice him, too. By Autumn, Wade sorely opened up to Weasel about his feelings. ---        "Ew, do you like...love him?" "Maybe."        "Gross. What are you gonna do?" Wade shrugged. "Nothing, same as usual. He doesn't need my insanity in his life, he's too kind and innocent."        "But you wanna fuck him, right? Maybe just try to do that." "No, Jesus! Are you even listening? Peter's not that kind of guy, and even if he was into it, I can't take advantage of him like that." Weasel's face scrunched in mild disgust.        "God, you have it bad for him..." "Yeah. It's like, he's a total bro, but fuckable. He's soft but strong, masculine but feminine, fierce but graceful."        "   " "He's the kind of guy you take on like fifteen dates, buy flowers and candy, get one of those stupid little Hallmark cards with some sappy bullshit saying how much the sender loves him. Then, you fuck him. Not at your place, but at his place, so he's more comfortable, and only after you've made him spaghetti and chocolate-covered strawberries, by candle light. You fuck gently. Passionately, but with strength, but you don't wanna hurt him. But he's secretly a sex tiger under the sheets, and it kinda scares you, but you love it, but you're still afraid to fuck him any other way than gently."     ��  "I feel like this is a fantasy you've had for a while." "No, of course not."        "So...he's your friend, you want to fuck him, but you don't wanna just fuck him because that would be taking advantage of him. Because you'd rather have a relationship with him, but you don't wanna have a relationship with him because you think he deserves better, but you're gonna keep hanging out with him and torture yourself. Is that... I mean, am I close?" "Like a Hawkeye arrow through a nutsack with a target drawn on it."        "Ow. I think my left testicle just rose back inside of me in fear." "Balls are very perceptive."        "Okay, well here's my advice." Wade learned forward.        "... You're fucked." "Thanks, I totally needed help figuring that out."        "Who is the guy, anyway?" "...Peter Parker..."        "Pete-- like Spiderman Peter Parker?" "Yup."        "How the fuck...?" "I know."        "I feel like I saw his face on the news last year when he got all discovered, but I don't remember. You got a picture?" "Yeah," Wade grumbled while reaching in his pocket for his phone.       "Heh, 'course you do, you sick-o." After glaring at his friend, Wade pulled up a picture of Peter and zoomed in on his smiling face.       "WHOA, holy MOSES, that guy is good looking!" "I know."        "He looks like a stallion and a buck had sex with an Irish setter!" "Yeah, told ya. Fierce, but graceful."        "I've always been a pussy-man, but I gotta say... He's making me question my sexuality." "He has that affect on people."        "That is MAJORLY out of your league." "Thank you." Wade put his phone away.       "How old is he?" "Nineteen."        "Whoooa, a little on the young side, huh?" "Just a little, but he's mature for his age."        "..." "...That sounded a little creepy, I take that back." --- Wade began an off-and-on effort of keeping Peter at arm's length. He went through periods of texting and hanging out with him less, but whenever it was clear that Peter could tell something was up, he snapped back into the picture. He couldn't bear to make Peter worry or feel as though he'd done something wrong. This went on for a couple of months. Peter too, was beginning to feel a little bit of romantic sting. Wade hooked up with a couple of people over the months, including Vanessa. There was a brief period where the two of them copulated like rabbits, and that was with the ex-prostitute knowing that Wade had feelings for someone. In the merc's mind, maybe he could get his needs out of his system, but it didn't work. If anything, he felt emptier after each fling. Peter was attracted to Wade before he even realized he was. Always seeking him out, making sure their friendship was solid, feeling a constant need to have a hand on him in one way or another. He also played into some of Wade's lewd jokes and would tease him. Then there was the dancing and singing, of course, which only got more intense as time went on (a natural instinct of the jumping spider to try and woo a mate through display). Tony and Steve began to notice the men getting closer, and Tony was very unhappy. Steve convinced him to stay quiet and let Peter figure it out. In late Fall, Peter turned 20. Wade was there for his party, as were Ned and MJ. It was a lot of fun! Come December, Wade turned 26. He'd tried another couple of times to get away from Peter again, but the boy wouldn't let him go. They were like a binary system of stars, unable to pull away from each other, constantly drawn back into one another's path by an unseen force. For how long could this go on before they collided? And when they did, would they blow up and break apart, or make one bigger, more beautiful star? ~~Spoken Interest~~ By January, Peter came to terms with his own crush, and secretly told Ned about it. For the next month and a half, the boys gabbed about it, and Ned found it adorable and kind of funny. Peter said he wanted to ask Wade out, but was nervous that Wade wouldn't be interested. "Well you're not gonna know unless you ask," said Ned. Peter flirted a little more with Wade, but it mostly came across awkwardly. It basically felt like he was just humiliating himself over and over again, but Wade was noticing the difference in him. Regardless, he tried to respect the space, and refused to give himself up. In February, Peter asked Wade to hang out with him at a park somewhere and "people watch," since Wade enjoyed that activity. He felt it would be a nice, serene setting to keep Wade's attention and finally admit his feelings. He told Ned about his plan; the latter was exhilarated at the thought, and said he'd be standing by. Peter put on a warm but nice outfit and drove off to their spot to talk. Even though it was casual as always, they could both sense tension. They sat and chatted for a while, and with a racing heart, Peter finally found the right moment to confess. ---        "Hey, so... I've kinda been wanting to talk to you about something." "Hamburgers."        "I... What?" "Hamburgers! They're weird, right? I mean, ham comes from pigs, and beef comes from cows. Hamburgers are made with cow meat, but we call them ham-burgers." Wade threw his hands up, head rolling about. "The fuck is up with that??"        "O-oh, hah, I guess it sounds more appealing than...beef...burgers...?" Wade nodded thoughtfully. "Hm. Yeah, sounds kinda naughty." Peter could hear Wade's grin, and he stifled a laugh. His own smile was more earnest, but his desire flitted behind it. "Like beef curtain, or beef stick--"        "Wade." "Yeah?"        "Look, um..." He turned to face his company better, now getting nervous.       "You and I are...really good friends, right?" "Why yes, broski dear."        "Hah, well... It's just... Ahh, I don't wanna say anything and...mess that up." "...Well, what do you wanna say...?" There was a long silence.        "...Okay -- okay, total honesty... Wade, I..." He drew in a deep breath.       "I like you..." They stared at each other. After a long silence, the older male playfully slapped Peter's arm. "I like you too, beef buddy! ... Yikes, wow, see? Beef is just a naughty word." Peter blinked, thoughts spinning in his head a mile a minute. Wade knew what he really meant, but he couldn't begin to believe that in its suddenness. He was bracing for Peter to call him out on his own crush and possibly disown him, but this threw him for a loop.        "N... N-no, no Wade, I mean... I like you...as more than a buddy, or a bro..." He swallowed.       "Or a friend..." He rubbed his hands together, slowly and tensely, brown orbs wide while looking at Wade. The cold white eyes of Wade's mask pierced back at him. "...Oh..."        "A-and... I just thought, m-maybe, if...you don't think it's weird, or if -- I don't know, if maybe you liked me too, we could...date...?" There was another long pause. This time, Wade understood for certain. When he looked forward to contemplate, stunned expression hidden by the mask, Peter looked off and around, his heart sinking. There were times when Wade was genuinely difficult to read, and this was one of them. Wade was getting his wish, it was like the start of his fantasy had come true! All he had to do was agree to it. "Uh, I don't think we should do that." He regretted it the second he said it. Peter felt his heart drop, and his face begin to turn red with shock and embarrassment.        "Oh," he croaked while looking down at his lap. Wade's answer stunned him. When the merc spoke, he tried to bring it back to a place of casualty in the hopes of removing the heavy feeling from the air. "Look, don't get me wrong, you've heard me talk about ya. You're precious, and I'd be beside myself to fuck your brains out." Peter almost smiled, but the desperation for answers overpowered the natural response to do so. Wade continued. "But you're romantic, you need stability. I'm a one-night stand kind of guy, friends-with-benefits and all that. You're not really about that life, right? I mean, come on. You wouldn't sleep with me without getting to know me, right?" Peter swallowed something dry and thick. Looking away, the hope for this to go anywhere withdrew from his gaze, and he shook his head.        "No..." Even Wade was at a loss for words for a moment. He may have turned his head away, but out of the corner of his eye, he could see Peter's heart breaking. He saw his red cheeks, his pinkish eyes. He could feel the sadness, and a lot of it was coming from himself, too. But he pulled it together again and lightly slapped the back of his hand against Peter's shoulder. "Eyyy, come on, this doesn't change anything, right? We're still pals." Peter quickly nodded. He was polite as ever, but the sensation that he had just gotten hit by a train was easy to read.       "No -- yeah, yeah yeah yeah, it's -- it's just... It's a little embarrassing, aha, I mean... You know, I..." "Nah, it's not so bad. It's adorable! Like I said, doesn't change a thing. Now when we get past this, I can tease you about thinking I'm a hot piece of ass." Peter did finally crack a small, broken smile and shook his head. He was glad that Wade wanted to be friends, but the damage was done. "...I mean you still wanna be friends, right?"        "Absolutely! I just... It's kind of a hard pill to swallow..." "Yeah, I know. You put yourself out there, then get shot down..." With genuine remorse and a strong but hidden wave of self-loathing, Wade laid a hand on Peter's shoulder. "I'm sorry." Peter nodded again and closed his eyes. He felt emotional, but why? Did it really mean that much to him? Staying strong, he glanced at Wade, mustering a hurt smile.        "Don't be sorry, you know I prefer honesty. I mean it'd be really stupid to say 'yes' when you don't want that, right?" As if Wade's heart couldn't sink any further. "Yeah..."        "Look man, um... It's -- I'm not like mad or anything, you didn't do anything wrong, but... I think I should go home, and just, like...try to process it--" "Yeah! Nothing wrong with that. I'll give you a couple days to uh...reel."        "Yeah, I think that sounds good." When they rose to their feet, they both chuckled sadly. In their awkwardness, Peter offered his hand to shake, which Wade accepted uneasily, but eventually pulled Peter into a side hug. "It'll be fine, we'll get past it. You take your time."        "K-ay..." With one last hurt smile, Peter left Wade's company. On the way back to his car, he finally let the tears roll. Wade watched him go until his car was out of sight, stunned by his own foolishness. He wasn't stupid; he knew he had made Peter cry. He knew he'd broken his heart, and he hated himself for it. When Wade got to his apartment, he took out his anger on his environment, taking to breaking a lot of things in his living space. --- Peter did his best to get most of his emotions out before he got home, but the sadness and hurt would linger. When he got inside he pretended everything was okay, but it was obvious his mind was elsewhere. Not too long after getting in, he went to his room and called Ned. ---    "Hey, what's up? Did you talk to him?"        "Yeah."    "...Uh-oh. What did he say?"        "He said 'no.'..."    "Awww man, Peter, I'm sorry. Did he say why?" Peter tried to keep his sniffles quiet, but Ned could hear them anyway.       "Yeah, u-um... He said that...you know, he's a one-night-stand kind of guy, and that I'm -- we're -- ... He doesn't...think it would be a good idea, because he just...likes sex, and I'm romantic, so..."    "That really sucks, I'm sorry."        "Me too..."    "...Hey, I rigged my GTA 4 game to get Carmageddon on the 360." Peter continued to hold back his emotions, but only half-cared about Ned's random statement.       "Y-eah...?"    "Yeah, it's really funny! Can I come over and show you? It should work on your 360." Now understanding, Peter smiled a little.       "Yeah, that sounds cool. We could, um... I could make...popcorn, or something."    "Awesome! Is now good?"        "Sure, uh -- lemme ask Tony first, just to be sure."    "Okay. Text me." --- After they said goodbye and hung up, Peter got confirmation from Tony that having Ned over for a few hours would be fine. While on his way to go prepare everything, May found Peter and insisted he tell her what was wrong, as she could tell something was up. Although he'd wanted to keep it hidden from his elders, Peter (naturally) trusted May and knew it was confidential, so he came clean. Seeing her nephew's broken heart, May consoled him and offered a little advice about how to heal up from it, and insisted that they would, yes, go back to being friends in time. ~~SpideyPool~~ In the days passing, Peter and Wade refrained from messaging each other. Peter went about his usual life, including going on regular patrols. He took down a couple of small criminals, helped a few people in minor danger. This always felt good; even the littlest of ways he could help people made his day brighter and his heart fuller. Wade, meanwhile, had spent the days since the rejection in sorrow and self-hatred. He'd smashed a lot of the stuff in his apartment and all but shredded the couch, laying face-down on the tattered furniture in a mess of stuffing, old food scraps, alcohol and the same outfit he'd had on when he last talked to Peter (minus the coat, boots and mask). It had been five days. But on this fifth day, Colossus happened to pop in. He knocked. ---   "Wade? You are playing Elvis again. Are you all right?" "AwwwWWW!! I'm not in the mood, Sputnik! Fuck the shit off!" Colossus opened the door and hunched in, turning off Wade's music.    "You should really lock door. Wade, you are a mess; what is wrong?" The merc answered him with his face still down and pressed to the couch. "What's wrong is this big metal dildo man keeps showing up at my door even after I tell him to fuck. the. shit. OFF." Colossus looked around, ignoring him.   "How do you live like this..." "I'm not living, I'm existing."    "Clearly. Is this another episode? Perhaps I should take you back to the mansion again." Wade lifted his head, tired eyes closed. "GOD, no! No more bland-coated walls with old white men all over them and every other X-Man acting like the studio couldn't afford to pay them to even just walk around and pretend they live there." Colossus raised a brow, but ignored him, as he was so used to doing.   "Well, if this is not episode, then what is it?" Wade's face flopped back into the couch, pressing in harder than earlier. "Imn mm bmng m thnntl dmshm."    "What?" With a heavy groan of aggravation, he sat up entirely, allowing small bags of food trash to spill onto the floor from its position under his body. Colossus winced at the crinkling and crumbs. "It's me being a total dipshit..." "What did you do," he asked tiredly while folding his arms. "I told you I liked some guy, right? Well... Turns out, he liked me, too."    "That is good news." "Yeah, it was, until he told me he liked me and I shot him down like a retarded clay pigeon in a Guantanamo Bay shooting range."    "..." "I swear to god, it's like while I wasn't looking, the cancer snuck into my brain and made me even stupider."    "Why did you turn him down?" "Because -- he's nice, okay? I don't just wanna get in his pants, I want to date him. I want to have a relationship, but he's not the person I should be trying that out with on account of how fucked sideways with a cactus my head is."    "On inside, or outside?" When Wade glared up at him, Colossus chuckled. Squinting, Wade lowered his voice. "Are you The Moby? 'Cos I haven't even taken The Great American Challenge yet, and I feel like you're stretching my ass WIDE open."    "Eugh! Listen..." Colossus softened up and sat beside him carefully.   "You are...different, very rough around the edges. You are afraid that this guy is too good for you." "No, I KNOW he's too good for me. I can't risk screwing up his life."    "How do you know that would happen?" "Uh, do I not ruin everything everywhere I go?"    "Only when you really mean to. But he likes you too, yes?" "He says he does... I'm not sure why."    "Maybe because, in your own strange way, you are charming man. You have a big heart, you care about people -- most of all, him, it seems." "That's why I gotta stay away from him."    "No, that is why you must go to him." Wade glanced up at his company.    "You must go tell him the truth, give it a second chance. He deserves to know what you are thinking, does he not?" "... No, I don't want to make him more miserable."    "If he is miserable, it is only because you have not been honest with him." "...You really think I should do this? You really think I should go over there and just...tell him how I feel?"    "Absolutely." "...Just admit that you want me, Colossus." Colossus sighed. "I don't know,..."    "Trust me, if you don't do this, then you will never know what could be. You will spend the rest of your life wondering what could have been, your soul will forever be restless." "..."    "...Who is it that you are pining for so badly?" Wade's voice almost cracked. "P-eter Parker..."    "Peter Parker?? You mean Spiderman???" "Yeah."    "OH, he is a VERY good young man... Erh...over eighteen, yes?" "He's twenty."    "OH, good." "Like you said, he's very good. He's not...he doesn't deserve all my shit."    "You will never know, Wade. Not unless you take risk." "..."    "If you try your best, if you let love in, and it is real, then your messy life will work itself out." Wade looked up at Colossus, who then put a caring, large metal hand on his shoulder.   "Maximum effort." "...Okay... Maximum effort." --- When Colossus left, Wade showered and started cleaning up. On the sixth morning after their last conversation, Wade called Peter, but the latter was around other people while in the facility. Not wanting to talk to him in front of anyone, he declined the call, but texted Wade saying "Hang on i'll call in a sec." He went to his room and did as was promised, calling Wade back while sitting on his bed. --- "Hey, Spidey!"        "Hey, Wade." He sounded a little tired, but was kind and open-minded. "What's up?"        "Uhh not much, I was with Tony and Wanda and didn't want to talk in front of them. Just...sitting in my room, now." "Gotcha."        "So...did you want something?" "Aww, you're still upset about the other day," he said with an audible smile. Peter sat up, voice more peppy.       "No, no, I mean I'm not upset, I'm just... It... 'Upset' is just such a harsh word, um... I'm just kinda sad, you know? It's -- I'm still just trying to...make sense of it all, figure out what's...going on in my head." "I understand."        "I'm sorry..." "Why are you sorry?"        "I don't know, I just feel bad, I mean this can't be fun for you, either. I just feel really stuck. And -- I told May, but only because she could tell how down I was." "May is nice."        "She's the best..." "...I miss you, Pete."        "Me too... Ned...rigged his GTA 4 disk to run Carmageddon on the 360." "What?! That's sick as FUCK!"       "Yeah... Maybe sometime we could hang out and play it together. It's really funny..." "I'd like that. Or... I could just come hang out with ya right now!" Peter sat up a little more.       "Oh, Wade, I don't know, I... I think I still need a little more time to process everything. It's -- I'm still not mad or anything, you're still my friend, it's just kinda hard..." "Oh... Well that's too bad, 'cos I'm right outside your window."        "--What??" After Wade's shadow cast onto the wall and got Peter's attention, he quickly looked to the left and saw Wade in the window, waving happily at him before putting the phone back to his ear. Peter tossed his phone down in shock and ran to the window.       "Wade!" He opened the glass pane, shivering at the freezing air.       "What are you doing?!" "Just felt I needed to come by and clear things up with you." After realizing he was talking pointlessly into his phone, Wade shrugged and tossed it.       "Wha--" Peter quickly fired a web at the little computer, snatching it and yanking it into his hand. Wade crawled into Peter's room through the window, and then the latter closed it and handed Wade his phone.       "Why would you throw this??" Wade took his phone back and chuckled. "Ewww, now it has webs on it...!"        "That's better than being broken!" Wade shrugged the snow off his shoulders. He was in full suit with a beanie on his head over his mask, and a fur coat. "Plungers make really good building-climbing tools, did you know that?"        "Eugh, you -- you used plungers to get up here?" "They're all new, it's fine. Well -- except for the one for my right foot, I wouldn't touch that one." Wade slid off his coat and beanie.       "Wade, what are you doing here...?" "I wanted to talk to you about the other day." Peter motioned for him to be quiet, then stepped over and locked his door. Turning back to face him, he kept his voice low, and so his visitor did the same.        "Okay?" "Look... The thing is, I like you, too. A LOT. I've had it bad for you from the start, Petey, but... It's like I said the other day; you're a nice guy, and--"        "Wait, let me just stop you there." He waited.       "I know that you like to sleep around, and that's okay. Some people are romantic, and some people aren't, and there's nothing wrong with that. I'm not judging you, I think what you do is totally fine." Wade nodded.       "But... I'm still not that guy, you know? I still need those things, I'm -- I want a relationship. It's okay that you don't want that, you don't have to explain yourself. But if this is a request to just...fool around, um... I'm...not game for that, I'm sorry." "...Aww, you're so cute," he said happily before roughing Peter's hair lovingly. Peter stood in blank confusion, having no response to that. "I'm not here because I want to have sex with you. I mean, I'd like to, but not like...right now, I mean like in the future, when we've been seeing each other for a little while."        "..." "When you asked me out, I said no because I didn't think I was right for you. I still don't, honestly, I mean you should really, just...turn around and run while you have the chance. Because I'm about to ask you something, and I don't have a lot of patience, and I might just blurt it, cut and dry."        "Wade, what the hell are you trying to say?" "I'm saying... Will you go out with me...?" Peter stood in total shock, staring blankly at Wade. "......Is that a 'no'? That's probably a wise choice, but I'm gonna...need verbal confirmation. I mean if it's not 'yes,' it's 'no,' because basic principle, but ya know. ...?" He finally blinked and shook his head a little, making an effort to make sure he kept his voice low.        "Okay, wait... You do want to go out with me...?" "Yeah. I've wanted to since like, last June."        "FFFFFFFF-- Wade...?!?!?" "Yeah... Pathetic, I know."        "So why did you say 'no' the other day??" "I told you, because I don't think I'm right for you. I'm super fucked up and you're really nice! You're --"        "Shh...!" He lowered his voice to something of a shouting whisper. "You have your whole life ahead of you to meet fucked up people, you should at least have some normal, healthy relationships first...!"        "Wade, that's up to me to decide, and I know you think you're like the worst person ever, but you're actually really a good guy...!" "Why are we whispering...?!"        "Because if Tony finds out we're even discussing dating he'll throw you to the moon...!" "That would suck...!"        "I know...!" They both stood a little taller, each sighing some and looking off before focusing again. They stopped whispering, but remained quiet.        "So..." "I'm just saying... I've got a lot of baggage, and problems, and a whirlwind of mind shit that falls out of its little shit-filled cabinet whenever it feels like it. I have LOVED being your friend, but I'm..."        "...Yes...?" "...I'm scared of hurting you..." Peter relaxed and took a step towards him.        "You're not gonna hurt me." "You don't know that."        "And you don't know that you will. But if you think that, but you still had the nerve to come tell me how you feel and ask me out..." Wade looked up at him cautiously.       "...Then you must have some sort of faith in it being okay, right?" "..." Peter started to smile.        "What if we just tried it? Why don't we just...date...? And if it doesn't work out, then that's okay. We can just be friends. I mean that's what we were working up to being again anyway, right?" "That's how it would have to be. I can't lose you, Spidey, you mean a lot to me."        "..." "You're like ice on a burn. You have...the BEST heart. I don't wanna hurt it."        "Stuff's gonna hurt me, Wade. That's life, it's okay. If you hurt me, we can get past it." "...You promise?" Peter smiled bigger.        "I promise. Hey, who knows? Maybe I'll hurt you or something, pfft." Peter couldn't see it, but Wade was smiling, too.        "If you're serious, and this isn't you feeling guilty about saying 'no' or asking for a one night stand... I would love to go out with you. PLEASE, let me go out with you." --- And so it was, they secretly began dating. Wade made arrangements to take Peter out that very afternoon. After Wade left through the window, taking his plungers with him, Peter called Ned in a slight panic. He excitedly explained what happened and told him he needed to prepare himself for the date, and they hung up. When it came to Tony, Peter had to keep quiet. Like before, he didn't tell anyone, including May; he just didn't want anyone to know yet. The first date was just spent with the boys wandering around a nice part of the city, discussing how they liked each other and how long each of them have felt it. Wade explained that he was a mess for the days following his rejection of Peter, and that it took Colossus busting into his apartment and yanking him onto his feet to get him to go talk. He also confessed to having slept with a couple of people, including Vanessa, which Peter was more than fine with. But, he emphasized, Wade really needed to look into STI testing just to be safe. The first date didn't end with kissing or anything randy, and Wade still didn't show Peter his face. Instead, they hugged, and Peter drove back home. The dates following were very similar, with food as part of the equation. They even had a "parkour date," where both got in full suit and leaped around the city, showing their abilities to one another for the sheer sport of it. Peter even held Wade and swung around the city with him on his hip. According to Wade, this was terrifying but romantic. By this time, Peter told May and MJ. After a few weeks, Peter and Wade felt relatively steady. Tony and Steve could tell something was different with Peter when it came to Wade, and Tony had his suspicions from the start. Peter knew that Tony could sense something unusual, but he played around it and acted casually. Tony chose to stay quiet about it. During a date one late afternoon when Peter and Wade were on a harbor, in suit, the sun out after a light rain (yes, it must be that specific), Peter pressed a little harder to see Wade's face. He understood why Wade was shy about it, but kindly argued that it was difficult to date someone he'd known for over a year while still not having a clue what he looked like. Feeling that Peter's reaction could really make or break the potential of their relationship, Wade finally conceded and removed the mask. To his surprise, there was no horror or tension, or even the slightest bit of disgust. He looked a little surprised, briefly raising his eyebrows with a blink, and studied him. He said "Wow," and that was about it. Wade started to make jokes about himself, to which Peter put his arms around Wade and told him he wasn't allowed to insult himself whenever he was in the Spiderman's arms. This became a new theme with them. After a minute of talking, and with Wade allowing his new partner to lightly touch his scarred cheeks, he asked if Peter had anymore requests before the mask went back on. ---       "...You could kiss me..." Wade stared at him in light disbelief.        "...Or -- or not, it's totally optional. Just a suggest--" As the cliche stands, Wade kissed him, cutting off his sentence. When he pulled away, Peter was stunned and glowing.        "O-ohhoh... Okay, I-I don't have a lot of reference, but... That was really good..." "I agree." --- Wade put his mask back on, and the two were smitten. A few days after their first kiss, Peter finally sat down with Tony and Steve and came clean about his recent dating situation. Steve didn't love the idea, and Tony hated it, but the former offered support and simply asked that Peter be careful and trust his instincts. Tony was a tad more chilly with his honesty, but when Peter became insecure, he emphasized that he wasn't angry. He just didn't trust Wade on a romantic level, and feared Peter getting hurt. This gave Peter the opportunity to remind Tony that he was a big boy now, and he could handle making his own mistakes, and was willing to face the consequences of his decisions. It ended on a positive note, but Tony couldn't hide the lack of thrill he had over the new relationship. Weeks turned into months, and things when steady. In their time together, Peter got permission from Tony to make his very own original suit. Given how comfortable he was with Wade, and with the relationship also recently going public, Peter felt the desire to start fresh and switch up his look with a lot more blue. For one thing, the blue complimented Deadpool's vast red and helped him stand out.~ That May, when they'd been going out for about three months, Peter started becoming more bold in his physical interest in Wade. He'd been to the merc's apartment several times as well, and had actually managed to convince him to start cleaning the place up and get some new furniture. He wasn't judgmental; he merely worried for Wade's state of mind and the health hazards, insisting that he might feel better and more confident if he lived in better conditions. This conversation brought Wade to inadvertently mention how he was desensitized to the squalor due to being forced to sit in his own waste and vomit for a while when he had gotten ill at the Mutant Factory. This was one of the most serious things Wade brought up right off the bat, but upon seeing Peter's face stricken with shock and concern, he clammed up. Peter assured him that there was nothing to be ashamed of, and that he appreciated Wade talking to him. The conversation helped Wade feel better, much to his shock, and he agreed that it might be good for him to clean up the apartment. So he did just that. It wasn't spectacular, but the improvement was great, and Wade actually found himself wanting better for how he lived. In June, Peter's physical interests were more clear. They'd discussed sex, but Peter was shy, and Wade was never one to push. But finally, while making out one day, Peter came to the conclusion that he was ready to be intimate. They each went home and planned for Peter to go to Wade's. They each wanted to shower and prepare for it first. Peter brought a small bag with a movie and his suit in it (just in case). He told Tony that they were just going to have a movie date. Tony didn't like it, and insisted Peter also take his iron suit (which is tightly compact into a small shape when dormant like the Ironman suit). Peter obeyed, willing to do anything to help Tony feel more comfortable about him being out and about. At Wade's apartment, the pair chilled for a little while, but Wade was eager to show his company how he'd prepared the bedroom. He led Peter to his room, revealing soft pink and orange shaded string lights pinned up around the walls, nice bedding, and an overall sense of warmth. Needless to say, Peter was very impressed, letting Wade know he did not expect this, and didn't require it in the future. But yes, he absolutely loved it, and knew he would have a good time. When they were done, they both fell asleep in Wade's bed. Tony called around 1 in the morning, asking where Peter was. He was a little upset, but nothing Peter couldn't work around. He apologized and said they were both tired from watching the movie and then playing some video games, so Peter crashed on the couch and forgot to tell Tony he was staying the night. After a little back and forth, Peter reassured him that everything was all right and encouraged him to go back to sleep. He promised to come home early in the morning with a box of donuts as an apology. Tony hesitantly agreed, and left him alone. Once more, the next day, Peter made a point to tell Ned about his escapades. The next few times Peter went to Wade's house, he ended up spending the night. And again, he lied his ass off to Tony, saying they just had a new routine of playing video games until they crashed. Tony knew better, and Peter knew that, but neither were willing to give on the subject. By this time, Peter quietly told aunt May that his relationship with Wade was now very serious. She was excited for him, proud and happy and double checked that he was being safe. Embarrassed and a little exasperated, he confirmed this, and just like that May was back in fun mode. She was able to accept that Peter was grown now, and she was glad to try and guide him through this very impressionable period in his life. The morning after Peter's fifth time with Wade, Colossus visited unexpectedly while the boys were still sleeping. Wade got up and addressed him, completely naked, while Peter stayed back and hurriedly put his clothes on before meekly coming out to greet the metal man. He was shy but thrilled to meet the infamous X-Man. After Peter convinced Wade to at least put on some underwear, they all sat down together and had a chat. Colossus was happy to finally meet Spiderman, and when Peter got home, he told his family about how funny it was to wake up and meet Colossus. Later that day, Tony finally pulled Peter aside and broke down, having a serious discussion with him about the relationship. He asked for full honesty on whether they had become physical, and Peter answered honestly. The talk was civil, as Tony loved Peter too much to ever take out any frustration on him, but his concern was clear. He told Peter he respected that, that Peter didn't need to feel bad about it; he was just making sure everything was okay. Not that it was any of his business, but he considered his family to be his business. Peter didn't mind, so long as Tony stayed cool. The Ironman did confirm that Peter understood the fact that he wasn't going to invite Wade to live with them. Peter agreed. When Tony asked if Peter was thinking about living with Wade, the latter said "no." "So what are you gonna do?" Tony asked. Peter told him that he would just keep doing as they had been; dating, hanging out, and if they wanted to have personal time, Peter would go to Wade's. He told Tony he felt he really loved Wade, and was okay with the fact that he was, in Tony's words, "super fucked up." He understood that he wasn't responsible for Wade's mental health, but that he enjoyed helping him through some of his issues. He understood that trauma like this was a long-haul, and he was willing to at least try. After all, everyone he knew was traumatized, himself included. The conversation helped clear the air a lot for the father-and-son pair, and Tony grew a greater respect for the relationship. A week or so after that conversation, Tony ended up having a talk with Wade. The merc shocked him with his raw honesty about his feelings for Peter, revealing his only intention was to be happy with him without weighing him down. He loved him, and he would do anything for him, including whatever he could to please his family. He understood why everyone flocked to shield Peter; he was different, special. It was then that Tony finally saw an ounce of what Peter saw in Wade, and his respect grew. In August, Peter turned 21 and in December, Wade turned 27. In that time frame, Peter began sneaking Wade into his room sometimes to get physical.~ Not long after Wade's birthday, Tony finally came to grips with the reality that Wade wasn't going anywhere. His relationship with Peter was incredibly strong and steady, and despite Peter having his job, his family and friends and Wade, he'd managed to make it all work. They were mature, and mature together, and Tony wanted Peter to have every opportunity possible to make things a little easier. So as a surprise, he told Peter he was going to allow Wade to move into the facility, even though he wasn't being offered any Avenger titles. He even said he didn't mind if Wade and him shared his bedroom, so long as they weren't mindless sex idiots and kept everyone awake all the time. Stunned, Peter was beyond grateful. Together, everyone gathered up and invited Wade to the facility to make the offer. Wade was uncertain at first, asking if they wanted him to be an Avenger. "GOD no," said Sam. Peter informed him that this had no strings attached, and asked if he was ready to move in with him. Wade said yes, and accepted this very unexpected, beautiful birthday present. In being offered to move in, this was the Avengers fully embracing Wade and adopting him into their weird, messed up family. In time, they would learn to see that Wade was in fact, a good man with a big heart, and become used to his mouth. ~~Love Forever After~~ Living together, it was a dream come true. For the first time in Wade's life, things finally seemed to be on a steady path, and he would do anything to keep it that way. He was happy, he wanted to stay happy, and most of all, he wanted to do well for Peter. With them being together (even before Wade had moved in), Peter helped Wade open up about his past and his feelings. He wasn't judgmental, he wasn't off-put by Wade's mannerisms, weirdness, strange coping habits, random emotional moments, nightmares, or even the nastiest of content regarding his past. He just listened and consoled, and even shielded Wade from the harshness of others. With a guy as wonderful as the friendly neighborhood Spiderman, even though he wasn't perfect, Wade had a tough time feeling like he could give back enough. What he didn't tend to understand was Peter already felt Wade did give back. Wade was a passionate, attentive, caring, thorough lover, and exceedingly generous. He did anything and everything he could for Peter. Aside from just being the best mate he could be, he couldn't think of much else, but it was more than enough. Peter needed him, too. And when Peter had problems, his heart was heavy or he had his own traumatic episodes, Wade was there for him. He applied the very things he'd learned from his love and gave back. After some months living with Peter, Wade had his first serious emotional breakdown related to his trauma. Deadpool, Spiderman, Ironman, Scarlet Witch, and War Machine were out on a mission one night. On a rooftop, after the mission was finished and they had regrouped, Peter was wrapping some things up when a casual conversation started between Wade and the others. The Mutant Factory got brought up, which Wade appeared fine with. He joked casually about what he went through, and the others listened. But at a certain point, after making a comment about his torture that initially caused him to laugh, his laughter suddenly turned to tears. At first the others just went along with it, used to Wade's emotional switches at this point and figuring it would be fine. But when the merc's weeps became sobs and he could no longer stand up, everyone finally realized something was wrong. James stood by Wade and Wanda knelt beside him, clueless as to how to help or what exactly was happening. Tony called Peter to their gathering on the rooftop, and when the Spiderman saw his partner in a heavy heap of tears, he sprung into action. Wanda and James backed away to give Peter the space to console him. He was understandably confused and alarmed by the development, but stayed calm. Tony had an idea of what was happening, cluing Peter in with a reminder of how he had suddenly felt okay enough to grieve his uncle when the time came. It clicked; Wade finally felt safe and comfortable enough in his life that his mind was ready to start the healing process. Peter carried Wade away from the group, who let them have their space. He removed his mask, and convinced Wade to let him take his off, and he held him. Wade announced that he didn't understand what was going on and that he couldn't stop, so Peter told him not to stop. He told him that this was a good thing even though it didn't feel like it, and that it wouldn't last forever. After a while, when Wade was calm enough, Peter took him home. He explained to him what he thought was happening. From that point on, Wade was much more prone to having harder breakdowns, but at that point they seemed to happen at more appropriate times. He also had an easier time talking about it, even if it did hurt like all hell. Thankfully, for Wade's sake, his primary trauma response now is sobbing and nightmares. And when it happens, someone is always there to help him. Of course he still has his random weepy moments at weird things, but Peter has always been understanding of that and never judged him. If anything, he only ever helped Wade feel validated. When Peter was 22 and Wade was 28, the Trial of the Gods ensued. This was hard on Wade, and revealed he had a host of dependency issues with Peter. It led to them having a serious but gentle talk, where Peter offered to work with him on easing his mind about the fact that bad things happen, and if anything bad ever happened to Peter, he needed the peace of mind that Wade would take care of himself. Stay clean, healthy, surround himself with his friends, continue to do good things. If not for himself, then for Peter, because he would want that. Wade agreed, even though the conversation was hard. Ultimately, Wade's mind never reached any peace until he went on a mission and secretly killed himself in order to get to The Realm of Silence, Interitus's realm of the dead. After having a quick conversation wherein Wade asked the elk god if he would ever die for good, Interitus told him 'yes.' He said that Wade would not live forever, that his time would come when it was right, and in death he would be with his beloved. This gave Wade all the peace he needed. Someday, Wade and Peter will get married. How, when and under what circumstances remain a mystery. For now, they're just loving life together. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[steves-on-a-plane]

Run. (Part 9)

Part One / Part Two / Part Three / Part Four / Part Five / Part Six / Part Seven / Part Eight / 

Words: 1020 Pairing: Tony Stark & Reader   Timeline: The Avengers: Age Of Ultron [2015]   Other Info: Run AU     Summary: Clint shows up at the Tower and tells Reader to grab the kids and go. He’s there to take them to a safe house where they can hide from Ultron with the rest of the team. 

“MoOoOm!” Your daughter Serina called for you somewhere near the apartment’s front door. “Hawkeye’s here!” You were in the kitchen attempting to make four dozen cupcakes for Eddie’s school. There were baking supplies everywhere and the place was a mess. You brushed as much flower off yourself as possible before heading to the front door.

“Clint,” You greeted him with a nod. “Everything alright? Where are the others?”

“They’re fine. I think. We gotta go.” He told you impatiently.

“Go, go where? Where’s Tony?” You asked.

“He’s safe.” Clint promised. “You guys have go-bags or whatever right? In case of emergencies?”

“Uh yeah, Steve made us make them when we moved into the tower, Tony’s supposed to check them every six months. You nodded before turning to your daughter.

“On it.” She nodded. “Top shelf in your closet, right?”

“Get all four, Kiddo!” Clint ordered as your daughter jogged down the hall.” We got five minutes. Get what you need and we’re out of here.” He told you.

“This thing is safe, right?” Serina asked you and Clint as she strapped her younger brother into one of the jump seats on the Quinjet.

“The best your dad’s money could buy, I’ve been told.” Clint laughed as he began flicking switches and pushing buttons from the pilot’s seat. “Just be glad that I’m the one flying and not Steve. I hear he’s not great with landings.” You made sure both kids were secured tightly in their seats before sitting in the seat behind Clint.

“What exactly is going on?” You asked once the jet had leveled out and you were soaring in the sky.

“Well, to quote Tony, we took a hit.” Clint sighed. “Ultron’s got the upper hand on us, again. Remember those two twins were telling you about? One of them can do mind control. She’s shaken half the team pretty bad. She had a pretty good hold on Banner, he leveled a good portion of the city we were in before your husband barely managed to get things under control.”

“Barely under control sounds like Tony.” You said. You got up out of your seat and started pacing.

“The Sokovian and American governments are thinking about arresting Banner, Thor’s nowhere to be found and Maria’s got no other ideas for us. Ultron’s been one step ahead of us this entire time. We’re hiding, including you three so that you can’t be used as leverage against us.”

“Cool, so we’re going to what an Avenger’s Safehouse? But if Ultron had access to all your files, would he had had access to your secure locations too?” You questioned.

“Yes.” Clint agreed. “But this place never made it into SHIELD’s records.”

“How can you be so sure?” You asked him.

“You’ve never met my wife, Laura, have you Mrs. Stark?” He questioned back.

“I didn’t even know you were married, Clint.” You confessed.

“That’s how I know.” He told you.

“Oh. Wow.” You were definitely surprised there was no hiding that. “You have kids?” You asked, sitting back in your seat.

“Yeah.” Clint nodded. “They’re in between yours. Cooper’s my oldest. He’s eight and his little sister Lila is six. It’s a three hours flight, [Y/N]. Even in this thing.” He added. “You might as well rest while you can, there’s not much quiet at my place at the moment.”

When you arrived at Clint’s farm, Tony and Steve were outside chopping wood. Your husband abandoned the task and approached the Quinjet as it landed. Serina unstrapped herself and her brother and both kids took off running towards their father. Tony held a kid in each arm and wait for you and Clint to disembark.

“Thank you, Barton.”  Tony said as Hawkeye stalked past him without a second look.

“I didn’t do it for you, Stark.” Clint called over his shoulder.

“He’s not happy with me.” Tony told you.

“Can’t really say I blame him.” You commended. “What’s wrong with Steve?”

“He’s…also not very happy with me.” Tony sighed. “Nat and Banner too before you ask. C’mon I’ll introduce you to Mrs. Barton and the tiny agents.”

You liked to think that in another life you could have been Laura Barton. Not that you fantasized about being married to Clint, but Laura lived a mostly normal life. She did her own dishes; she washed her own laundry and she lived in a normal house. A normal house without an artificially intelligent companion in every room. A life with a husband who didn’t invent killer robots that put her kids in danger. Yes, you could have easily been someone like Laura Barton in another life, but you also would have been bored.

“Mrs. Stark, and Serina and Edward, right?” Laura greeted you all on the porch. “Lila and Cooper are out back feeding the chickens if you two want to join them.”

“I love chickens!” Eddie exclaimed excitedly. “C’mon, Rina.” He started tugging at his sister’s arm excitedly.

“Okay, okay!” Serina laughed. She let her brother pull her away towards the back of the house where they could hear the chickens clucking.

“Oh and Mr. Stark, Clint said you wouldn’t mind but our tractor doesn’t seem to want to start at all, do you think that you could…” Laura frowned. She was obviously uncomfortable asking Tony for help.

“Yeah, I’ll take a crack at it.” He nodded. He kissed you before beginning to walk away.

“If you give that think artificial intelligence, I’m divorcing you.” You called after him.

“Look around you, Sweetheart,” He laughed. “We’re as far away from civilization as we could possibly get."

“I’m sorry about him.” You apologized. “He’s a terrible house guest.”

“I imagine you must apologize for your husband a lot.” Laura smiled.

“Yeah,” You chuckled. “And I imagine you don’t exactly have that problem. I’m sorry It’s taken us this long to meet.”

“I’m not.” Laura shook her head, “I’ve enjoyed the quiet life we have here, but I’ve always wondered about you, Mrs. Stark.”

“Please, call me [Y/N].” You insisted. “And I guess we can use this time to get to know each other.”

[avengerscompound]

It’s You and Me - Chapter 4

It’s You and Me: A Hawkeye Fanfic

Series Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Clint Barton x  F!Reader

Word Count:  1735

Rating:  E

Warnings:  Mentions of underage sex, and mentions of past child abuse, child sexual abuse and pornography

Synopsis: You and Clint Barton go way back.  Since you joined the circus as a child, he took it upon himself to keep you away from the people who really wanted to hurt you.  For years the two of you danced a line between dark and light.

When he chooses light the two of you go your separate ways.

Fifteen years later he tracks you down.  Those feelings the two of you shared never went away, but now he is not only an Avengers but a single father.  Can the two of you make it work after all this time when your lives have gone in such different directions?

A series told in flashbacks and current day.

Chapter 4: Then

Life in the circus could move on quickly.  When Clint stopped seeing you around Jacques Duquesne, he stopped worrying about you and while he did still see you around from time-to-time, the two of you didn’t have a lot to do with each other.  Unless you were in his field of vision, he didn’t spare you much of a thought.  He had other things that occupied him anyway.

For starters, he had this general need to be the best at what he did.  He practiced archery and swordsmanship so that people would be excited to see him.  Crowds would pay money and he’d earn his place legitimately and wouldn’t be made to pickpockets or run any of the scams they had going at any one time.

There was also Eden.  He’d been dating her since you showed up and it was getting hot and heavy pretty fast.  He didn’t feel the need to be glued to her constantly but he definitely liked being with her more than not.  Though it was hard to pick out exactly what it was that drew him to her.  She knew more about him than he knew about her.  She seemed to like listening to him prattle on about any old thing that popped into his head.  She never really gave him anything back though and sometimes he did wonder if he just liked the way she made him feel.  That thought never lasted long though.  She was a hot, a good listener, and even better lay, and at seventeen there wasn’t much else he was looking for.

You showed up a few months after you arrived at the circus while Clint and Eden were making out behind the trailer he shared with his brother and a couple of the other younger guys in the troop.  You stood awkwardly looking off to the side and Eden pulled back and looked at you.

“Can we help you?”  She asked.

“I just wanted to talk to Clint,” you said, shifting awkwardly.  “Sorry.” 

Eden shrugged and got up.  “I said I’d go rehearse a new routine with Ringmaster,” she said.  “He’s all yours.”

Clint watched her leave, his eyes almost transfixed by the way her tattoos moved as she swayed her hips, and as she disappeared around the side of the big top, he turned his attention to you.  “What’s up, kid?”

“You said you could teach me some things…” you said.  “Does that offer still stand?”

Clint stood and looked around.  “Jacques said something to you?  I thought you were looking after some of the animals.”

You shrugged.  “He said that the animals were all being looked after fine before I got here, and I needed to start earning my way.”

“Right,” Clint said with a nod.  “Come on.”

You hurried after him, your legs moving twice as fast to keep up with the strides he was taking.  “I’ll have to start with the basics, so you might need to find something in the meantime.  When I was your age they made me pickpocket to pay my way and I’d already had about eight years of training,” Clint said.  “But you don’t gotta pose for any photos.  We can work out some other way you can make the money.”

“Oh yeah?” You snarked.  “How exactly?  I don’t know how to do shit.”

“Hey, I’m trying to help you here,” Clint said.  “You want it or not?”

You looked at him like you were considering changing your mind before folding your hands over your chest and nodding.

“Maybe you can be my assistant until you get better,” Clint suggested, grabbing a couple of wooden swords from the weapons case.  “I can shoot apples off your head or Twizzlers out of your mouth or something.  Maybe we can play up the fact you’re a kid.  Have you come out in a cutesy dress with a balloon and I’ll pop it.  I dunno.  I’ll think of something.”

You looked down at your feet and nodded.  “Why are you willing to help me?”

Clint tapped the end of the sword on the dirt in front of him.  “What he’s doin’ isn’t right.  You’re a kid.  You shouldn’t have to go through shit like that.  And it’s not right a bunch of pedos have your pics now to get their rocks off too,” he said.  “We’re supposed to be a family here, and I know their moral compass is really fucked, but you don’t do that to family.”

You nodded and neither of you said anything for a moment.  Clint tossed you one of the swords and you caught it easily.  Clint was thankful for that at least.  Being naturally coordinated would take you further with this than his training would on its own.  You looked up at him and offered him a small smile.  “Thanks, Clint.”

“Yeah, don’t mention it,” he said.  “Gotta get good first.”

He took a stance with the sword in front of him.  “I’ll show you a routine and then I’ll go through it slowly with you.  Then you can try it alone and I’ll correct what you’re doing wrong.”

You nodded and Clint started.

He stayed training with you until the bell for dinner was rung.  There would be a show in an hour after that so he’d have to quickly change because he was usually the opening act these days.  You had been focused hard during the training and Clint was surprised how quickly you were picking things up.  You didn’t have the routine down perfectly, but if he went through the moves slowly you could follow along with him just fine.  If you continued to improve like this, you’d be sparring within a couple of weeks.

Clint just had to figure out how to train you, think of a way to keep training you, keep his own routine fresh, work you into that routine, and have time for a personal life.  He sat down at the bench next to Barney while you went and sat with Zelda and the other animal acts.  Zelda immediately started talking to you. The two of you began talking animatedly as one of Zelda’s python’s circled its way down the snake charmer’s arm and onto the table.

Eden came out of a tent with Tiboldt, the circus’ ringmaster and leader.  After scanning the table came she came to sit with Clint.

“What were you doing with the Ringmaster?”  Clint asked, accusatory.

He had trust issues.  He knew it but found them a little hard to keep under wraps.  Jealousy was big for him - maybe a psychologist would say it had to do with his father’s abuse and the fact he bounced around foster care, making him think himself unworthy of love - but Clint had never been to see one, so all he knew for sure was he didn’t trust Eden not to run around on him.

“Working,” Eden said simply and ran her hand down Clint’s spine.  “You jealous, baby?”

“No,” Clint huffed, and Barney began laughing.

“Sure you aren’t,” his brother taunted.

“You don’t have anything to worry about, Clint,” Eden assured him.  “I only have eyes for you, and no one is allowed to touch me except you.”

Clint looked at her, his eyes traveling up the tattoos on her neck to her perfect face, framed by her long dark curls.  She leaned in and teased her lips over his and he pushed forward, capturing them and kissing her passionately.  Barney made a gagging sound beside him.

“Get a room would you?”  He teased.

Clint pulled back and pulled a face at his brother.  “Would if I could.”

Eden laughed softly and turned Clint’s face to hers again.  “Don’t be jealous.”

“I wasn’t,” Clint lied.

“What did the kid want?”  She said.

Clint looked over to you.  You were laughing but there was something about the way you held yourself that told him you were still on edge and ready to fight if you needed to.  He didn’t trust Jacques, and he didn’t trust Eden to keep the secret well enough to stop it from getting back to Jacques.  If Jacques found out that Clint was training you, not only would you end up having to pose for photos to keep your spot in the circus, but Clint would be in a world of trouble too.  Jacques had once promised Clint he’d never beat him, and while it had never happened, there were times where Clint was sure it was a close call.  “Just had an idea about doing a routine with me,” Clint said.  “I think she wants to get out from behind the scenes?”

“Her?”  Eden asked, looking over at you.  “What talents does that little shit shoveler have that she can possibly make your act any better?”

“Just being my target,” Clint said.  “You know, the girl on the board.  She’s small enough, it’d work.”

“I could do that for you,” Eden said, running a long nail along his jawline.  “Imagine that?  The two of us sharing an act?”

“If you were part of my act no one would be looking at me,” Clint said.  “Besides, you know Tiboldt wouldn’t agree to that.”

She wrinkled her nose.  “I suppose you’re right.  And I suppose it’s good the little brat should start earning her keep.”

“Yeah,” Clint said with a frown.  “It’ll be fine.  All she has to do is not be shot by me and that’s mostly on me.”

“And you and I both know how good you are at hitting the right spot,” Eden teased.

“Seriously, you two,” Barney said, grimacing.  “I’m trying to eat.”

Clint smiled but it was a distracted smile.  One he wore to cover up the turmoil of his thoughts.  He’d learned a lot of things while at the circus, and among them was if he played friendly and dumb - people underestimated him.  He got up and wiped his hands.  “Better go get ready for the curtain call.  See you in a bit.”

Eden looked up at him startled.  “Okay, baby.  See you then.”

Clint scowled as he wandered off.  Most of the time he was just used to how fucked up everything was here because it was his normal, and much less fucked up than what he came from.  Then there were times like this where it hit him like a truck and he wondered if he’d ever really get free of it.

// NEXT

[bluebellhairpin]

Marvel Headcanons - Road Trips

A/N: I’m a horrible person. But at least my procrastination of my asks is being for-filled in a way that still sprouts content. - Nemo

Summary: The Avengers and their S/O go on a road trip. Gods? Mutants? Aliens? with them, what could go wrong? 

Masterlist  

Loki Laufeyson

Bruh. You go on a road-trip with this guy and you’re gonna really wish you d i d n ‘ t. 

Tricks. So many tricks. This guy can’t drive a car, he has nothing to do except play tricks. Look At That Face, no remorse, no mercy. You gotta be strong af to survive a trip like this with Loki. 

bUt he does buy you all the food. And all the stuff you like. In mass amounts. (“(y/n), you said you liked this sweet packet stuff right? Ah, good. I brought five boxes so we don’t run out.” ) Like five whole boxes

So what’s it gonna be? Trickery for food? Yay or nay? Yay, definitely yay. 

Peter Parker/Spider-Man

You will not sleep. Y’all get too hyped up of junk food and adrenaline to sleep for more then half an hour at a time so POWER NAPS ALL THE WAY THERE AND BACK

He video’s everything. He says it’s to show May and Tony when you get back but we all know the truth. Its so he can get one of those cool old-style videos of you No shame that boy has.

He lets you pick all the music, as long as it’s not AC/DC because he had an experience with Tony that involved ‘Thunderstruck’, hacking and his suits earpieces that lasted a over a week that we s h a l l n o t  s p e a k o f e v e r

But overall it’s a really cute trip. So cliche. So romantic. So amazing.

Tony Stark/Iron Man

Loves every second because it’s with you and after everything he’s been through that is all he needs and wants.

He has playlists, cars, hotel reservations, restaurant reservations, food stops, food stashes, sights to see. All these things are ready before you even suggested getting away for a couple days. 

Turns into a sappy, flirty mess. It’s almost like the trip turned back time to when you both first met and the only problem he had was making a new missile to sell to some place in Afghanistan.

He’s just so ready for a break, low and behold please give i t t o H i m

Steve Rogers/Captain America

Road-trips with Steve are done on the back of his motorbike and you can fight me on this. Mostly because he likes it when you wrap your arms around his torso so yeah fight me again.

Despite the trip being a road trip you both spend a lot of time at stops and motels instead of on the road. He likes taking things slow, since he hasn’t gotten to do things slowly for over four years after he woke up. He’s very grateful if you let him do this.

He lets you take lots of photo’s of him whether you’re good at it or not doesn't bother him. Even frames one you took of his silhouette because it looks that good to him. 

 Becomes addicted to cocktails after the second road trip because “they’re so colourful and come in so many flavours, (y/n) have you tried this blue one yet? Look they have one named after me-” 

Thor Odinson

He gets so hyped and excited. 

He really loves travelling and learning about earth more like you teaching him about earth stuff so he’s so optimistic about the whole trip and that attitude rubs off on you so you end up coming home all happy too.

He brings lollies/sweets/candy with you and lemme say you are bouncing off the walls the whole damn time. One time he got so hyped on sugar he almost summoned lighting. 

You take Loki sometimes. He pretends he doesn't like it, but he does. He thought we wouldn’t notice but we did. So Loki ends up being the ‘bored’ third wheel while you and Thor stuff your faces with sour worms, chocolate, and gobstoppers.  

Bruce Banner/Hulk

He’s gets so soft, and that makes you soft, and then you come back and your combined softness makes everyone else so very soft.

He worries about Hulk coming out and ruining the trip and the car but you constantly tell him and reassure him that it’s fine and you’ve managed to hone the ability to calm Hulk down when things get out of hand.

Needless to say he relaxes almost completely and w o w you didn’t know he sung that well.

And damn when you come back he’s like a changed man. Shyness? Almost gone. Reluctance to join conversations? Hell N a h. He almost becomes Tony 2.0 but only around you because “No one will believe you (y/n)”

Clint Barton/Hawkeye/Ronin

Clint almost l i v e s for road trips with you. I say almost because he lives for you.

You hunt down carnivals so he can win you all the prizes. The others aren't even surprised when you come back with a carload at stuffed toys anymore.

You also stop at a number of piers and sit at the end with fish and chips and some beer and just talk. Life. The future. The past. That one slice of pizza that tasted better than any others you've ever eaten in your entire lives.

You guys just do so much stuff. And its all so wholesome and pure and s o f t. 

Peter Quill/Star Lord

Did someone say road trip? Peter has all the tunes.

So much as touch the radio/speakers without his knowledge and you're preparing yourself to (possibly) walk home. He doesn't care if you're the other side of the country. You will walk.

He's a sucker for staying up and stargazing with you. He'll point out all the planets he's been to, and all the ones he wants to take you to later.

While Stargazing, be prepaid to have him jump up and pull you to him if a 'dancing song' comes on. That can range from the 'Livin La Vida Loca' to 'All of Me’. It's amazing. 

Scott Lang/Ant-Man

He's a dad. He knows how to keep others and himself  entertained on long trips.

Magic tricks. Snacks. Music. Jokes. Everything and anything you can think of to pass time, he's got it ready and waiting.

Sometimes he takes Cassy with you, and honesty things become more fun (if that's at all possible). Which means, for you, more food, music from your childhood, and embarrassing stories about Scott that Cass had managed to get hold of.

Overall it’s pretty cute going on road trips with Scott, that and it’s never ever boring. 

T’Challa/Black Panther

He’s a king, and a very busy one at that. So when you manage to pull him away from his duties he treats you extremely well. 

First he takes you to a certain county (Once it was Singapore (that was a very luxurious trip), another time Hawaii, etc), then he gets a hire car and takes you wherever else you’d like go.

Every time, every trip, he finds a Starbucks. He collects the cups and brings them back to Okoye. He does it to spite her. You know it.

He gets much more relaxed on the trips, and always comes back being able to deal with his duties much better.

Bucky Barnes/The Winter Soldier

Wow okay first off, Bucky loves road trips with you. 

He manages to persuade Tony to lean him one of his fancy older cars and takes you along the coast in that. He’s a coast road trip type of guy.

He really loves the beach, the only thing that gets in his way is the sand and salty water getting in the joints of his arm, but he says he can “just take it off, don’t worry darlin’.” so yeah it’s r e a l l y not a problem. 

If he can't get a hold of one of Tony’s old cars, he gets an old pickup truck/ute and camps outside on the back with you and watches the stars and has old 30′s/40′s music playing from the radio. It’s pretty cute. Like him. 

Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler

Mate. This guy has no idea what he's doing. 

Once he tried to bring, like, a whole ass record player because he was worried there’d be nothing to dance along to. Seriously, Kurt, we have a ca r a d i o for that. Precious Baby Boy.

He’s also pretty young, so be prepared to have lots of contraband School food (sour lollies, chips, etc) stashed everywhere in the car. This boy will eat all the junk food he can lay his three-fingered hands on. R E S T R A I N HIM. 

He'd probably take every opportunity he can to cuddle you or take you hand in his. He’s not quite used to doing ‘normal’ stuff like this, so the fact he’s doing something like that with you means a lot. 

Doctor Stephen Strange

He’s, um. He’s not used to this sort of thing either.

He’s been this arrogant, selfish, self-absorbed neurosurgeon for as long as he can remember. The most social and intimate thing he’s used to doing is ‘faking it’ with some random to make him look good.

BUT, sudeNly with you he kinda turns to a charismatic, sweetheart gentleman that will actually take you wherever you’d like to go. France? Okay. Brazil? Just south a little. China? Food’s great there. Russia? We’ll take ice skating lessons before we go. 

He can’t actually leave NYC for long, but he will spend as much time with you on trips away because they help him relax and it’s n i c e.

[the-grays-of-ink]

Movie watching and Fakes

*Watches movie*

Me: Okay so the trivia says the actors trained with Olympic archers for this movie, I might be able to watch it without cringing.

*Five minuets passes*

Me: Oh my- okay so you trained with Olympic archers and THAT’S how you shoot? Dear Lord, how movie makers have become lazy. No, NO, that’s like four inches too low!

*Later* 

Ugh why is everybody impressed? That shot, based upon the alleged abilities of the character wouldn’t even be worth doing in TRAINING, it’s so easy. Even done correctly, which y’all DIDN’T DO, it would still be an easy shot for an amateur could complete the shot easily.

*Later, again*

Aww how cute, he’s teaching his daughter how to shoot- WHY ARE YOU PRAISING HER? THE FEET ARE WRONG, HER SHOT WAS WRONG, THE BOW SHOULD BE BIGGER FOR HER, Y’ALL ARE TOO CLOSE TO THE TARGET, THE ACTOR DIDN’T ACTUALLY EVEN SHOOT-

*AGAIN*

Mhmm. Yes, I’m supposed to believe *character* is an all knowing archery master. So then, wHY IN GODS NAME DO YOU SHOW THEM CASUALLY DRY-FIRING? EVEN THE SMALLEST CHILD KNOWS THAT’S BAD!

*Turns off movie in disgust*

Sometimes knowing how things actually work, especially in watching movies is a curse. This happens to me when people try to fake orchestral instrument playing, usually violin because it’s most common (I’m a violist, but violin fakes work the same) but cellos are easy to spot too. This happens with Karate too, I took classes for a while and loved it, but I can spot almost all of the movie BS. Even when it’s a good fake, being so exposed to these certain things has made even a good fake easy to spot. I understand that they can’t have all of their actors learn these things for one project, but it makes me so sad to see favored characters, figures that are so looked up to, blatantly misportraying these things that I love. I get it, it’s flashy and exciting, but people all to quickly believe these flashy fakes that are fed to us. The truth is, if you see almost anything in a movie that takes a long time to fully master, odds are, at least some portion of it was faked.

Now this isn’t always true, for LOTR, (which I haven’t watched) Orlando Bloom really did become a crack shot after training with Olympic archers for a very long time. For the sword fights in The Princess Bride, specifically the one that takes place between the man in black and Inigo Montoya on the cliff, Mandy Patkin and Cary Elwes actually did learn a lot of fencing, both theories and techniques, but because of the time crunch on the project, neither of them were masterful enough to fight freely, they could only perform the choreography.

For some of the worst fakes I’ve seen, I’d have to go with Hawkeye briefly teaching his daughter a little archery in Endgame. The bow was too small, I could tell that the draw weight was off for just the way she pulled it back, her feet were wrong and so was where the taught arrow when pulled rested at her cheek. They were too close to the target, even for beginner lessons (I was at ten yards when I was eight). When she “hit the target” (I think there was a continuity error in this scene too), she was praised without correction of the issues.

For another terrible representation, not so much as fake, is the ending of the Karate Kid. Yes, he looks ridiculous, that was my first thought too, but that “kick” is total BS. There is a kick called the crane kick, it is a simple 1/2 kick with a small jump. Basically, it’s exactly like the one in the movie, except you don’t stick your arms out, or your leg up, and you don’t need to make a noise. The real crane kick was hidden underneath the ridiculousness of that whole business, but for reference, the kick is like the one in the movie, but with dignity. And practical potential.

For good fakes, Hawkeye in the Marvel movies is pretty good, occasionally I’ll see a mistake, but for the most part it goes well. What was fake was the whole “shoot the control board with high tech arrow” bit (With the characters canonic draw weight, it was just mess up the stuff inside, you can’t stab a control board and have nothing happen.) A lot of his arrows are high tech and not explained, so I can keep my illusion of disbelief temporarily. 

A good portrayal (not so much fake) is the Disney Pixar movie Brave. The way that the animators drew her bow (so to speak) was largely accurate. Fun fact: When Merida shoots the middle of the target that had another arrow and splits the first arrow down the middle with her own, this is an actual thing! It’s called “Robin Hooding” it. I almost did it once, when I was eight but because my draw weight wasn’t high enough to split it, it just broke the back. (Note, neither of the arrows landed in the middle. It was pure chance but I’m still proud of it)

Dubbing in Sherlock: 👍

It’s pretty obvious in some bits but I’ve certainly seen worse.

Umbrella Academy (haven’t seen this one either but I have seen clips) has FANTASTIC faking. It was honestly the best fake I’ve seen, and the first good one I’ve seen as well. I won’t go into detail, but the actor was taught basics of violin and she had a stunt double that was the same height. They never showed the face of the character and the violin playing at the same time and the double actually played the pieces they needed.

In conclusion, most fine arts that are represented in movies are fake, but sometimes, they’re real and very, very occasionally, it’s cooler in real life. 

(Actually the real life version is always cooler cause you can actually do it, if you have time and money) 

[sokovian-imagines]

Proper Family  Child!Reader x Avengers

Warnings: None I think? Summary: After years of only theorizing about your past, you finally meet your mother. Word Count: 1595

A/N: Hi! It’s been a little while but here’s a request!

You never knew a lot about your past. You were put up for adoption around seven years old; you only remember bits and pieces. You remember a place called The Red Room, you remember people trying to train you for reasons you don't know, but one day, they just dumped you at an orphanage. You also remember a red-headed woman you believe to be your mother. You don't know why she gave you up, or if she even had a choice, but your past is behind you, and you'd rather just forget it.

You never really draw attention to yourself, you only have a few close friends, but not even they know about your past. Luckily, for you, a lovely couple decided to foster you until you get adopted or when you turn eighteen.

You walked down the crowded hall, keeping your head low and moving as quickly as you could.

"Y/N!" you heard someone call. You turned around and saw one of your closest friends, Alice.

Once you and Alice got to your locker, the hallway cleared out. "What's up with you? You're quiet, well, quieter than usual." Alice bumped your shoulder.

"It's nothing," you replied, stuffing books into your locker.

"Yeah, sure. Because when someone says nothing is bothering them, that actually means nothing is bothering them." Alice raised an eyebrow.

"It's just that guy Blake-" Alice interrupted you.

"What'd that dick do this time?" Alice made the agitation in her voice evident.

You sighed, "Nothing... Yet... He's just been getting to me lately. He always sees me watching the news and researching the Avengers, and says stuff like 'you can never be like them' and just douchey stuff like that."

"You don't need to be like an Avenger to be awesome!" Alice tried cheering you up.

"Yeah..." you smiled at her and went your separate ways to your classes.

You were in the back of the classroom, taking some notes. "Which Patriot leader organized the Boston Tea Party in 1773?" Mrs. Lekins asked.

"Samuel Adams... Samuel Adams..." you said in your head. Even if you knew the answer, there was no way you were going to say it out loud.

"Samuel Adams?" One kid responded.

"Correct!" Mrs. Lekins wrote it on the board.

"Yes!" you silently praised yourself.

"Attention students and teachers," A voice spoke through the intercom, "We have some visitors. They will be going from classroom to classroom. Please remain calm and in your seats. Thank you."

Whispers filled the room. Alice leaned over to you, "Who do you think it is?" She asked, and you shrugged.

The classroom door flung open, and a tall blonde man walked in, and immediately, everyone recognized him. Thor Odinson. "I am looking for a young lady-" Before Thor could finish every girl in the room raised their hands, except you. "Her name is Y/N (Y/L/N)," your eyes went wide as everyone else's looked at you.

"I think you got the wrong name. I'm no one special." you sunk lower in your seat. You hated the attention that was on you right now, especially from the God of Thunder.

"That is not true!" Thor strode towards you, "You are the daughter of Lady Natasha Romanoff!" Thor knelt in front of you. "My team and I have come to retrieve you,"

"Retrieve? What am I, a football?" you cocked an eyebrow.

Thor laughed, "You are most certainly not a football." He stood up and held a hand out, "So if you would follow me, I can take you to your mother." your eyes shot over to Alice who had a giant smile on her face.

"What are you waiting for? Go! And of course, you can come back for me." Alice chuckled.

You looked back at Thor, who was still holding his hand out, you looked at the people in your classroom. Your eyes drifted to Blake who's mouth was dropped open. You decided it was time to show him how special you really are.

You stood up, threw your bag over your shoulder, and took Thor's hand. "Excellent!" Thor walked out of the room, and you tried to keep up with the giant steps he took.

"I have obtained the girl," Thor seemed to talk through an earpiece.

"Obtained? Retrieved? Maybe I am a football..." you joked to yourself.

Thor led you out of the school where all the other Avengers were waiting. You knew all of them. Iron Man, Captain America, Hawkeye, Falcon, the twins Wanda and Pietro Maximoff, even the Winter Soldier! However, your eyes drifted to a woman; a woman with bright red hair and wearing all black. She seemed to get teary-eyed when she saw you. You couldn't place your finger on why she looked so familiar. Yes, she's Black Widow, but she just seemed more than an Avenger.

"Good job, Thor." Captain America said, "Hi," he smiled at you, "you're probably very confused right now, but we'll explain when we get back to the base if that's okay with you?" He's even as charming as you imagined. You nodded.

You looked behind you and saw all the students pressed up against the windows. The Avengers started walking towards the jumbo jet that was sitting in the grass.

You slowly started walking towards the jet, still in aw that you're going on a jet with the Avengers. THE Avengers!  You walked into the jet and looked around. You saw Tony Stark talking to Clint Barton who was flying the jet, you saw Steve Rogers, Thor, Bucky Barnes, Bruce Banner, and Sam Wilson talking, then Wanda and Pietro Maximoff were talking, but you saw Natasha Romanoff just staring at you.

You awkwardly scratched your head and walked over to Steve Rogers. "Um... Mr. America-uh, I mean Rogers. Mr. Rogers?" you weren't sure what to call him, "Am I in trouble or?"

"No, no, no! You're not in trouble. I'll tell you why you're with us soon enough." He smiled; you nodded and walked away.

You took a seat on one of the chairs connected to the wall of the jet. You were fiddling with your sleeves until Natasha walked over and sat beside you. "Hey," she greeted, you smiled in response, "I know this is probably really confusing and scary, but I promise you're here for a reason." you nodded. "D-do, you know who I am?" Natasha asked.

"Yeah. You're Black Widow," you replied, but you knew that that's not what she was getting at.

She stared at you; her mouth opened like she was going to say something. "Yeah, I am..." It seemed like she was going to say something else, but decided against it. Natasha got up and walked over to where Tony and some of the others were talking.

After what felt like an eternity, the plane finally arrived at its destination.

You followed the superheroes out of the plane and into the building. Everyone was casually talking as they all headed in different directions while you stuck near Natasha as she led you through the building.

You two entered what looked like a conference room. You took a seat next to Natasha.

After a moment of silence, Natasha spoke. "I know this all must be incredibly overwhelming and confusing, but I just need you to trust me, okay?" you nodded, and she took a deep breath, "Your name is Zenaida Romanova. You were born in a training facility in Russia called the Red Room. You were trained there for around seven years before they deemed you no good enough and gave you away." Natasha looked to the floor and took another deep, shaky breath before continuing, "And I'm your mother," she looked up at you with teary eyes.

You breathed in through your nose, "I know,"

Natasha's eyes widened, "You know? How do you know?"

"Well, I always knew I was from Russia, hell, that was my first language before having to learn English. I always had terrible nightmares about this weird place; I never knew what it was. When I got older, I took an ancestry test, and my results came back with nothing. I had no history whatsoever. So, I connected some dots. I never really believed it, but it gave me some comfort in believing that I knew my backstory, even if it wasn't true, but it is, I guess, so..." you rambled.

Natasha chuckled, "You would make a great spy..." she mumbled. "Well, I just want you to know that it wasn't my choice to give you up. I fought so damn hard to try and keep you, but... They won anyway. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you while you were growing up,"

You smiled, "It's okay. You didn't have a choice plus, technically I am still growing, and you're here now,"

"You're okay with me being in your life now?" she hesitantly asked.

"Why wouldn't I? Even if you weren't my mom, you're Natasha Romanoff! The Black Widow! I mean, you're awesome!" you exclaimed, making your mom laugh.

"Come on," your mom grabbed your hand and led you out of the room.

You hurriedly walked down the halls until you came to a stop in what looked like a living room. All the Avengers were spread around the room.

"Everyone," Natasha got everyone's attention. "I'd like to introduce you all to my daughter, Y/N Zenaida Romanoff," everyone started cheering and clapping, happy to see you two reunited once again. You smiled at your mom as she pulled you into a big hug. You took in a deep breath as you enjoyed the feeling of having a proper family.

Requested by Anonymous:  Hi could you please do a Natasha x daughter reader? Where the reader is Natasha's by red room experiment but discarded and put up for adoption when she isn't good enough for them? Then years later the Avengers visit the daughters school, but the daughter has become shy due to bullying so she's too scared to talk to Natasha please? I LOVE your work, child reader x Avengers is like my life lol