#random picture I saw of Katniss with her bow drawn from the movies

[the-grays-of-ink]

Movie watching and Fakes

*Watches movie*

Me: Okay so the trivia says the actors trained with Olympic archers for this movie, I might be able to watch it without cringing.

*Five minuets passes*

Me: Oh my- okay so you trained with Olympic archers and THAT’S how you shoot? Dear Lord, how movie makers have become lazy. No, NO, that’s like four inches too low!

*Later* 

Ugh why is everybody impressed? That shot, based upon the alleged abilities of the character wouldn’t even be worth doing in TRAINING, it’s so easy. Even done correctly, which y’all DIDN’T DO, it would still be an easy shot for an amateur could complete the shot easily.

*Later, again*

Aww how cute, he’s teaching his daughter how to shoot- WHY ARE YOU PRAISING HER? THE FEET ARE WRONG, HER SHOT WAS WRONG, THE BOW SHOULD BE BIGGER FOR HER, Y’ALL ARE TOO CLOSE TO THE TARGET, THE ACTOR DIDN’T ACTUALLY EVEN SHOOT-

*AGAIN*

Mhmm. Yes, I’m supposed to believe *character* is an all knowing archery master. So then, wHY IN GODS NAME DO YOU SHOW THEM CASUALLY DRY-FIRING? EVEN THE SMALLEST CHILD KNOWS THAT’S BAD!

*Turns off movie in disgust*

Sometimes knowing how things actually work, especially in watching movies is a curse. This happens to me when people try to fake orchestral instrument playing, usually violin because it’s most common (I’m a violist, but violin fakes work the same) but cellos are easy to spot too. This happens with Karate too, I took classes for a while and loved it, but I can spot almost all of the movie BS. Even when it’s a good fake, being so exposed to these certain things has made even a good fake easy to spot. I understand that they can’t have all of their actors learn these things for one project, but it makes me so sad to see favored characters, figures that are so looked up to, blatantly misportraying these things that I love. I get it, it’s flashy and exciting, but people all to quickly believe these flashy fakes that are fed to us. The truth is, if you see almost anything in a movie that takes a long time to fully master, odds are, at least some portion of it was faked.

Now this isn’t always true, for LOTR, (which I haven’t watched) Orlando Bloom really did become a crack shot after training with Olympic archers for a very long time. For the sword fights in The Princess Bride, specifically the one that takes place between the man in black and Inigo Montoya on the cliff, Mandy Patkin and Cary Elwes actually did learn a lot of fencing, both theories and techniques, but because of the time crunch on the project, neither of them were masterful enough to fight freely, they could only perform the choreography.

For some of the worst fakes I’ve seen, I’d have to go with Hawkeye briefly teaching his daughter a little archery in Endgame. The bow was too small, I could tell that the draw weight was off for just the way she pulled it back, her feet were wrong and so was where the taught arrow when pulled rested at her cheek. They were too close to the target, even for beginner lessons (I was at ten yards when I was eight). When she “hit the target” (I think there was a continuity error in this scene too), she was praised without correction of the issues.

For another terrible representation, not so much as fake, is the ending of the Karate Kid. Yes, he looks ridiculous, that was my first thought too, but that “kick” is total BS. There is a kick called the crane kick, it is a simple 1/2 kick with a small jump. Basically, it’s exactly like the one in the movie, except you don’t stick your arms out, or your leg up, and you don’t need to make a noise. The real crane kick was hidden underneath the ridiculousness of that whole business, but for reference, the kick is like the one in the movie, but with dignity. And practical potential.

For good fakes, Hawkeye in the Marvel movies is pretty good, occasionally I’ll see a mistake, but for the most part it goes well. What was fake was the whole “shoot the control board with high tech arrow” bit (With the characters canonic draw weight, it was just mess up the stuff inside, you can’t stab a control board and have nothing happen.) A lot of his arrows are high tech and not explained, so I can keep my illusion of disbelief temporarily. 

A good portrayal (not so much fake) is the Disney Pixar movie Brave. The way that the animators drew her bow (so to speak) was largely accurate. Fun fact: When Merida shoots the middle of the target that had another arrow and splits the first arrow down the middle with her own, this is an actual thing! It’s called “Robin Hooding” it. I almost did it once, when I was eight but because my draw weight wasn’t high enough to split it, it just broke the back. (Note, neither of the arrows landed in the middle. It was pure chance but I’m still proud of it)

Dubbing in Sherlock: 👍

It’s pretty obvious in some bits but I’ve certainly seen worse.

Umbrella Academy (haven’t seen this one either but I have seen clips) has FANTASTIC faking. It was honestly the best fake I’ve seen, and the first good one I’ve seen as well. I won’t go into detail, but the actor was taught basics of violin and she had a stunt double that was the same height. They never showed the face of the character and the violin playing at the same time and the double actually played the pieces they needed.

In conclusion, most fine arts that are represented in movies are fake, but sometimes, they’re real and very, very occasionally, it’s cooler in real life. 

(Actually the real life version is always cooler cause you can actually do it, if you have time and money)