#like nobody is forcing you to read or read a literal physical book

[tonkatsubowl]

hsr penacony men reacting to the reader being a yandere

▼ trigger warning. for alot of things.

aventurine would most definitely keep an eye on you. he previously stated that he lost everything in life and that he had nothing else to lose anymore, but now... with your love for him, he knew that he would never try to lose you. however, your behavior got worse as the two of you got into a relationship. you became obsessive, possessive and toxic at times. you threatened others when they got too close to him, and there were times where he literally had to hold you back. aventurine liked this side a bit, but when it got triggered, he had to do everything he can to prevent you from murdering everyone in sight. he'd soothe you with words to calm you down, and there would be times where he had to physically keep you down. kisses and hugs would do the trick, but sometimes it'd take more than that.

"again?" aventurine murmured as he approached the dark alleyway of the outskirts of penacony.

the stench of blood filled his nostrils as he approached you obliterating an innocent person, your eyes wide and an insane smile adoring your veil.

"(y/n)..." he placed a hand atop of your shoulder, seizing you of your actions. you look over, your blood-covered face softening when you see your lover.

"she's dead. there's no need to make a mess now." he soothes you, stroking your hair as he began to clean you up with a handkerchief.

"she was certainly being a mess earlier," you cooed, "i had to get rid of her. she was talking about wanting to sleep with you, and—"

he hushed you by pressing his lips against yours, before pulling away. he couldn't help his popularity in penacony, but his reputation was extremely dangerous. because of you.

"it's alright, dear. remind yourself that nobody other than you will be able to have me."

"... hehehe. i just love you so much, kakavasha."

dropping the murder weapon, you embraced him, tainting his expensive clothing with the victim's blood.

"... i love you too." his gaze softens, looking at the gruesome sight before him. now he has to clean this up...

dr ratio knew that this side of you was hidden, somewhere, waiting to be summoned. he knew the moment he met you for the first time, there was something about you that wasn't... right. and now time has flown by, and the both of you were engaged in a relationship. however, he didn't calculate that this side of you would be so dark.

luckily for you, dr ratio was an introvert and only spent his time reading books and whatnot. he spends his days indoors, doing whatever a mathematical, physiological and scientific genius would do, so you didn't have to worry about him going off.

however, just one moment he walks into a public library and all hell breaks loose. a woman admiring him from afar would be declared missing, and you would obviously be the reason why.

he sighed, seeing that the woman's body was laid to rest, and you were approaching him with the murder weapon in hand.

"veritas!" you exclaimed, bouncing towards him with glee, "i missed you!"

he eyes at the gruesome sight behind you, sighing to himself as you embraced him. you impressed him, seeing that he did not calculate this dangerous side of you. but you had to be controlled. he definitely learned that questioning you of your antics and beliefs would drive you crazy and go on both a rampant and a rampage.

"...i missed you, as well. but please do not make a mess, next time. i'd rather not see you coat yourself with blood again. if anyone sees you, then—"

"or what." you threatened, your eyes widening. "let them see. let the world see! the world needs to know that you're mine. you're mine. you're mine. you're mine! you're mi—" you went off again, and he had to quiet you by placing a hand atop of your head. "i am yours," he forced himself to reassure you, "but i would much rather you not get caught. do you understand that?"

as though your demeanor changed, you became a guilty dog that was caught ripping something apart (literally). your eyes pleaded, as you look down.

"okay..."

"good. now let's clean you up."

sunday knew this side of you. considering he was also a manipulative person, he truly didn't mind that you were doing this but at the same time, he had a reputation to keep. he didn't want you to dirty the streets of penacony due to a bit of jealousy or hatred towards other people who admired sunday.

but he was given word that you were killing one of the guard dogs of the family, who spoke ill about you. well deserved, he thought, until he had to clean up after you.

the doors opened, revealing you, multiple guards watching you with horror and disgust, and the victim that could not be even seen as a victim anymore but a pile of intestines and minced meat.

he sighed, pinching his nose, before approaching you. the guards around him shook with terror as they were confused how he of all people was not affected by your actions.

"(y/n)," he calls out to you, "must you be this dirty with your actions?"

"he was talking ill about you." you say, looking towards him as you got up, happily skipping towards him, "so i got rid of him."

well deserved, sunday once again thought, but now he has a mess to clean up.

he signaled the guards to clean up the minced meat pile, before wrapping an arm around your shoulder. "now i have to drag you into the bath to get you washed up."

"okay! will you join me? you have to. you need to. or else everyone here dies, and—"

"i will." sunday nods slowly, pressing his lips at corner of your lips. "do not fret."

and because of this, and all the previous other events you did, you were practically nicknamed the "dog of sunday". you were a dog to be corrected on a leash, always by sunday's side, and a threat to those who opposed the man.

loyal, and forever by his side, waiting to bite.

[evergone]

Theodore Nott General + Dating HCs

Theodore Nott x reader

Warnings: Smoking, alcohol, nudity, swearing.

Description: General and dating headcanons.

Smokes mostly when he’s anxious or angry (or any other negative emotion) rather than as a recreational activity.

Has tried to quit, but never sticks with it.

A big fighter — hates it when people talk shit about you or his friends and is almost always the one to start fights.

So protective of you it’s not even funny, and Blaise and Draco are always there to back him up when he fights for your honour or whatever.

Physical touch and quality time are his two biggest love languages because he didn’t get much of that when he was growing up. After that its gift giving, acts of service, and words of affirmation (he’s not a big talker).

Always has to be touching you in someway, be that linked pinkies or you sitting on his lap.

If you’re a legimens he always wants you to be reading his mind so you can see how pretty you are.

Argues with Hermione Granger’s annotations in the library books and forces you to take his side even when you think he’s wrong because “you’re [his] girlfriend and therefore you have to be on [his] side.”

Doesn’t personally wear glasses but loves to try on yours if you wear them — especially if you’re really blind.

Loves it when you read to him (he just loves the sound of your voice).

Prefers essays and non-fiction to fiction.

Is surprisingly good with kids. If you have siblings then they’re probably obsessed with him.

Not a big pet name user because he likes the sound of your name but when he’s drunk or feeling particularly soppy he’ll call you ‘lovey’ and occasionally ‘baby’ or ‘babe.’

Doesn’t mind being called pet names, but also prefers his name. He just adores being called ‘Teddy.’

He swears he doesn’t have a best friend, but everyone likes to assume they’re his best friend which can be a bit difficult when someone mentions this (“I’m literally his best friend, Blaise, what the fuck?” “He barely even likes you, Pansy!” “He doesn’t like either of you, I’m his best friend.” “Shut up, Draco, I’m his girlfriend and therefore his best friend.”)

In actuality, his best friend is probably Madam Pince.

So smart its not even funny. He’s coming in the top three ranks for every class he takes.

Also has no time for stupid people. If someone can’t keep up with his brain than he just won’t talk to them ever again.

Never wants to be a Death Eater and when Draco told him that he was, Theo didn’t talk to him for a week.

Has read almost every book in the library.

Sometimes reads muggle books as a sly form of rebellion against his father.

His favourite book is one you bought him for his birthday.

Doesn’t really like animals all that much but if you have one he’ll tolerate it (the kind of guy to say ‘no’ to getting a puppy and then gets it for you but ends up as the puppy’s biggest fan, like, buying a million different dog beds and including it in family photos).

Loves to take baths with you, especially if you let him wash you or you wash him.

You’d think his favourite place at school would be the library, but its actually his dorm. He loves it when you stay with him for the night — mostly because he likes to hold you, but partly because he likes when everyone gets to see you walking out of there in the morning.

Has a million photos of you up on the walls of his dorm and his bedroom at home.

His favourite pastime is taking you shopping.

Prefers to hang out at the shops with you, Pansy, Daphne and Millicent (and sometimes Astoria) than staying behind with the boys because he gets to pay for all your stuff.

Dresses better than anyone in the school and expects you to dress just as well.

Takes you to every event he’s invited to because he’s a little more popular than you.

Definitely doesn’t think or know he’s popular though. He thinks he’s such a little recluse that nobody really knows who he is, but everyone knows him and so many people think he’s incredibly cool. Draco and Blaise make a point not to let him know this so he doesn’t get a big head.

Doesn’t know how to cook so you try your best to teach him.

Loves everything you make for him.

His favourite type of music is vocal jazz.

The two of you didn’t have a secret relationship per se, but neither of you told anyone when you started going out and just let everyone figure it out using context clues (Daphne and Pansy were so offended that you didn’t tell them and will never forgive you for this).

If you weren’t already a part of his friend group, he wouldn’t put in any effort to introduce you to them because he’s not a sociable person himself, but Draco, Pansy, Blaise and Daphne would have all included you so quickly.

Hates taking you home with him because his father is such an arse, much prefers your home (especially if your half-blood or muggle born).

Is so intrigued by muggle things, would have loved muggle studies if his father let him take it as a class.

If your family are very aligned with your cultural heritage he does everything in his power to learn about it. He loves dressing in your traditional dress.

[edenfenixblogs]

hey i saw the post about your cousin's bar mitzvah, and well first of all congrats to her. but also uh one thing you mentioned made me curious- what *am* i supposed to do should i find a dead body on the side of the road, if it's no problem for me to ask? not to worry you or anything like that but i guess it'd be useful to know if i pass a car crash on a road trip again.

Ah! What a good ask!!!! I see you committing to the act of learning more about Judaism as an act of allyship, and I appreciate you! Thanks so much for taking an interest.

Obligatory disclaimer: I’m not a biblical scholar or a Talmudic expert. I’m just a Jew who likes being a Jew.

So my Torah portion was in Leviticus. For those who don’t know, Leviticus and Numbers are often considered the doldrums of Torah books. It’s not where a lot of the well-known exciting parts happen. Those books generally contain a lot of lists of rules and mitzvot.

But this is actually why I like the way Judaism reads the whole Torah in order. It forces us to confront the “boring” stuff. And in so doing, we have to think harder about why that stuff is included in our books.

So that’s why my assigned portion was interesting to me.

The actual text basically says “don’t touch dead bodies.” But I remember reading the Talmudic scholarship which was especially interesting because its focus was to elaborate on all the exceptions and then talked about the importance of doing good deeds without a reward and not punishing those who need to do things like touch dead bodies.

The point of the text isn’t to condemn people who are doing the “forbidden” thing without any cause. The text outlines a lot of rules (many of which are not relevant anymore) and, frankly excessive punishments for breaking the rules.

But Judaism doesn’t end at the literal text. Talmud (rabbinical interpretation) is equally important.

My take on the material was this:

There are some things that, on the whole, we shouldn’t do. We shouldn’t touch dead bodies. We shouldn’t come to synagogue when we are sick. We shouldn’t cheat on our spouses. Etc.

But sometimes, you do need to break the rules. And for some things, someone must always break the rules. There must be someone in any community whose job it is to touch dead bodies. Someone must bury the dead. At the very least.

For people in that position, it is so vitally important that we do not throw the literal text in their face. It is important that we do not condemn them or shun them or otherwise exclude them from our community. Judaism is about community. And you cannot have a community that is based upon excluding people who do essential jobs. Rather, thank them. Because they are doing a good thing with no inherent reward. Quite the opposite. Those people should be celebrated. They take on the hard work knowing it carries risk of exclusion and judgment, but they do it anyway. Because it’s right.

Back in the day, if you saw a dead body on the side of the road and no one seemed available to bury it? Bury it. Give that fallen soul dignity. Then pray about it. Physically and emotionally wash the sin* away. (*sin in Judaism is not the same as the Christian idea of sin. Sin is more akin to an “oops” or “missing the mark.”) And take pleasure in doing something good for humanity and knowing that nobody else had to take on that sin for you.

So, nowadays, if you see a dead body on the side of the road? Call the person whose job it is to deal with that. And thank them for doing this very emotionally difficult work. Welcome that person into your community. Be kind to them. It matters. Because there is no community at all without them and people like them.

And in general? The more broad lesson to this is to of course be kind to people who do unglamorous but necessary work. And to take on that unglamorous work ourselves when necessary. That’s how we keep our community functional and healthy. Do good deeds without expecting a reward. Do what’s right even when you expect a bad outcome. Do good and right things for their own sake, because that’s what we exist to do. Create goodness in the world. The reward is the better world we create.

Thanks for asking @clawdia-houyhnhnm

[ravewing]

thinking about flame again (as per usual).. genuinely i dont and never will understand wof fans who saw him be bitter and angry and cold and shut off from years of never having a home or real friends and feeling isolated and say "yeah, no, he's evil."

he lived his whole life in the talons, constantly moving and never having any place to tether himself to emotionally. imagine the impact that must have on a literal child. i know i like to headcanon that he and viper and ochre were friends but nothing in the books actually indicates that he found any emotional consolation in ANYONE with the exception being his mother, who probably never even really got to spend much time with him. i dont really remember what exactly the talons did though so idrk. he probably had to witness the horrors of war via the aftermath of battles that he likely saw when traveling, and even though he was shielded from being drafted into the skywing army that still doesnt lessen the emotional impact that that'd have on a fucking kid.

imagine you go through years of that, and finally, one day, some big, majestic, 'allknowing' nightwing shows up and tells you that you're a part of the fabled dragonet prophecy, and you finally have some hope that maybe it was worth the struggle, that you are actually worth something, just to find out that you were nothing but a replacement. and don't even get me started on when he and the other alternates were transferred to the nightwing volcano, where they went without food for DAYS and were forced to fly nonstop to some remote island and for probably the first time in his life, flame met other skywings- just to watch them burn alive in front of him. all while he is STILL A KID.

then the literal NEXT DAY he is forced to fight the other alternates, and winds up with an unimaginably (both physically and emotionally) painful scar that makes him feel like an unlovable, weak, ugly monster. all while he watches a dragon who's essentially his sister die right before his eyes in the lava.

this all makes him wall himself off from other dragons, because he's scared that they'll think he's as weak as he sees himself; it makes him angry and bitter at the world, it makes him hate himself and it eats him up inside. we get a really good insight on this in book 6 when moon reads his mind, where he thinks that he doesn't even deserve his mother's love because of how scarred he his, where he thinks that nobody takes him seriously, where he thinks that he has no friends nor allies.

and then people still have the sense to call him evil because of, not despite, the emotional barriers he has from the turmoil and trauma he's experienced.

[zlebooks]

NOT THAT INTO YOU! 𓍯 al haitham

meet the support group! forced companionship because their childhood homes are literally in front of each other. they’ve been at it for YEARS. masterlist

al haitham: linguistics major. stereotypical kuudere but he’s just plain cold. rigid ass. into literature; has a book collection in his dorm (read: condo unit his uncle paid for) which takes up like 75% of his space.

kaveh: architecture major. popular w the girls and boys. somehow a member of every org in campus??? NEW JEANS STAN. insufferable kpop stan, actually.

tighnari: botany major. plant dad. plants. he just loves plants. owns a stan twt account that nobody knows of and he gets into petty fights with swifties (explains his amazing clapbacks against kaveh)

cyno: physics major. doesn’t know why he’s in physics. owns a meme account EVERYONE knows of. insufferable meme account owner.

[deadlymagicbeans]

May I please request fluffy domestic headcanons for Sparda boys? Just quiet home life with their SO, they deserve it so much :'-)

**Hey Anon! it'd be my pleasure! these boys deserve a long nap and some cuddles as their lives are so chaotic haha. Thanks for requesting this! - Bean**

Devil May Cry: Dante, Vergil, Nero Domestic Headcanons with their S/O

*Gender neutral pronouns for S/O*

Dante:

Considering he's out for jobs a lot to pay the bills, when on his off days he's very laidback and not wanting to do anything at all. Most of the time he's begging his S/O to come lay with him when they're up and about, He's a cuddle monster and will not let his partner go once he has his grip on them.

Loves the quiet moments he gets. whether him and his S/O be cooking (aka forcing him to save money instead of spending it on pizza much to Dante's whining), laying in bed watching old reruns of corny romance movies with them or just spending the day away doing nothing at all, he cherishes them. He's a very busy man and has seen the horrors from literally hell and back, so for him to spend a day doing nothing and to be around the person he loves the most it gives him a glimpse of a life of normality he craves oh so much.

Wants to wake his S/O up with breakfast in bed, as you know it's what a normal domestic couple would do right? but every time this man sleeps in way past 1pm to the point he gets briefly upset if he finds out his S/O was up before him which spoils his plans. (he's catching up on like 20+ years of sleep, he's knocked out cold.)

Loves to take bubble baths, it's a luxury he didn't have until he had his shop (and when his water bill is paid), but only saves them for times when he can share them with his S/O and cause you know water ain't cheap?

Overall he loves the quiet home life him and his S/O have when life isn't constantly trying to throw deadly demonic curveballs at him but he wouldn't change it for the world.

Vergil:

Relaxing? Vergil? no chance, this man is always up and ready to pounce whenever the next threat or fool tries to challenge him. But with a S/O he will calm down just a tiny bit but still always on high guard.

When he's truly comfortable, he seeks to be alone. but the only exception he'll accept is with his S/O, Most of the time it's him sat reading a book with his S/O fast asleep hugging him.

He has a stash like Dante. but this time it's books, piles and piles of Books. You won't find him reading any romance novels anytime soon though as he finds them in his own words "Distasteful".

He isn't the best at a normal domestic life as he's pretty much never had one up until now. The concept of a "day off" is absurd to him, there must be no time off in the seek for greater power... but that can wait for a few hours while he stuck to the bed by his S/O's demanding cuddles (get this man to sleep, he needs it).

He would never say it out loud but he secretly loves to spend time with his S/O alone in those peaceful moments, gives him a small life outside his normal life (if you could call it normal). Heck even over time he might open up to his partner more and more with his physical touch and life. (only alone that is, if anyone else comes in *Cough* Dante *Cough*, Vergil immediately is back to his normal standoffish self)

Nero:

Nero is the only Sparda family member with the most normal balance of hunting and home life than the other two, so overall Nero spends the most amount of time in his off time with his S/O. but it still isn't that much.

Wouldn't confess it it publicly but he loves the closeness of domestic life, too others it may seem mundane but to Nero? it's the closest he'll ever get to a normal life and he'd be damn sure nobody will interrupt it.

Loves doing stuff for his S/O, like cooking (also i see Nero being the only one not to burn down a building by just turning a oven on), chores etc. his outward appearance may him him grumble but this man will want any chance to be around his S/O more.

Nero loves to cuddle or do anything that involves the chance too, sleeping? yes, watching a new series together? also a yes. but ever try to bring it up in front of anyone else and he'll deny any of that happened (Everyone knows he's lying).

Doesn't have a "stash" like the other two but loves video games, he has a small collection of games he personally enjoys but unlike the others Nero is willing to let his S/O play a game or two while he watches them. He thinks it's cute to watch them rage at a boss fight, just don't get him to do it because if he finds it hard then he might have to buy a new remote.

[bluecrocss]

Those Annabeth "fans" lol

I really wanna let this topic go, but if I have ONE MORE non-black pjo fan, come on to my page and explain to me how "they grew up seeing the book characters (they're literally only talking about Leah, btw) one way, and they just can't reconcile it with the show 🥺", I might commit serious bodily harm...

They act like only white kids read PJO. I was little black girl reading it in middle school and annabeth was my favorite character. Do you think I was like, "oh she's blonde and white, how can I ever relate to her??" I didn't really have that choice, cuz as a kid MOST of the books/shows/plays/movies I had growing up, most characters didn't look like me. The hunger games, harry potter (forgive me, I was a kid), nancy drew, every disney princess movie, you name it. I notice how only white people complain about "struggling to connect" with characters that don't look like them, cuz POC have always had to do it. When POC ask for representation, it is because we have historically been ACTIVELY excluded, not because we can't connect to the characters otherwise 🙄

When it was halloween, and I dressed up as my favorite princess (Belle) and my brother dressed as his favorite superhero (superman), we just wore the wig and the outfit. I didn't need to paint my skin white to see myself as Belle. Yet every year there's this new controversy of some white person painting their skin or doing some offensive cosplay when they dress up as a POC character, because they see the race of POC characters as INHERENTLY part of the costume.

Why does your perception of Annabeth and the pjo characters trump mine, because you're white and I'm not? I fully viewed Annabeth as a white girl when I read the books, and when I saw Leah was cast, that didn't change my view of the character because her race was never central to the character. The author has stated the same thing. If you can't view a non-white/non-blonde version of annabeth (I am not speaking about the writing of the show or Leah's performance because this discourse started as soon as she was cast) as annabeth, then the parts of annabeth that actually mattered, the parts that Rick has identified as the most important, the part that I and millions of other non-white, non-blonde girls connected to, never connected with you. Rare representation of Neurodivergence in a female character, being underestimated (which had nothing to do with her being blonde lmao), perseverance, emotional vulnerability, overcoming generational curses and broken family life, abandonment issues, I could go on...

If you managed to grow to the age of maturity and still struggle to connect with people and view people as equal beneath their physical/material presentation, that is a YOU problem... the rest of the world shouldn't have to hold your hand through this.

And once again... NOBODY FORCED YOU TO WATCH THE SHOW. You don't like the casting, DON'T WATCH. Stop, coming to my comments and explaining how you're the exception, and you're not being ignorant, how, in fact it's the author, the casting directors, and the majority of the fanbase, who just don't understand her character the way you do 🥺

Give me a break.

[imbecominggayer]

Writing Advice On Self-Harm (tw obvi)

Hi, even though this post is going to be about serious issues such as self-harm and suicidal ideation and all of that fun jazz, I am going to speaking about this topic with the same tone I always do. If that is considered offensive, just remember I am a person who has been sent to the crisis center and does self-harm :)

Remember, these are just my personal experiences. Everything is diverse and it's okay to mention that these experiences are not universal. HOWEVER, don't accuse me of lying about any of this shit!

TW: Talks About Self-Harm, Mental Illness, And Everything Related

Actual Introduction:

Despite the fact that whump and angst tend to include mention of suicidal thinking and self-harm, they rarely feel realistic in my own point of view. Obviously, there are various different motivations and actions for self-harm but I just want to see some of my own representation.

So here are some myths about self-harm and myths about mental illness in general since they tend to overlap.

A) Everyone Who Self-Harms And Thinks Of Suicide Is Mentally Ill

Yeah, this is pretty big misconception in the community so I just wanted to establish this.

Outside influences like unhealthy friend circles, stressful situations, and abuse which are linked yet not conclusive for mental illness can influence someone's desire to do self-harm.

While mental illness is a big motivator for self-harm, self-harm is just a coping mechanism. And not everyone who uses coping mechanisms are mentally ill

B) Self-Harm Can Only Happen Like [EXAMPLE]

There are various different ways of self-harming.

Personally, I tend to scratch my arms and specifically my left hand since my dominate hand is my right. It's also just an easy place to reach.

So I get a tinsy bit upset when the only "serious" type of self-harm is shown by cutting. Especially since I felt that the only way someone would ever take me seriously is by using a knife.

Remember, readers are going to be reading your shit so please try and diversify your self-harming from the physical and the mental since every single self-harm habit outside of "ritualistic cutting" tends to be judged as "less serious" or "not real".

Mental self-harm is real and self-destructive.

C) Self-Harm Is Dramatic

This may just be a me-thing but my self-harming mental struggle definitely isn't like how other people write it.

Genuinely, I treat self-harm like it's just another thing I do.

"Oh yeah, sometimes I write, do a bit of scratching, read a book, and watch youtube"

I self-harmed exclusively in public spaces since my self-harm is mostly conflated with my anxiety. And these people do not notice a thing. Genuinely. LIke, I have literally turned my entire hand red and bloody and nobody noticed.

It's just that nobody ever suspects it since people don't think of scratching casually in class when they think of self-harm.

When I was forced to go the crisis center since I expressed planning of suicide, I was making jokes the entire time.

When I shared a room with this amazing person(they/them) who had bipolar disorder. We just talked about our sexualities, job dreams, and watched The Amazing World Of Gumball.

I miss them.

GRAND CONCLUSION:

The point of this last section is to illustrate the fact that those with mental illness aren't removed from society in the way authors tend to write them.

In the minds of authors, once you express possible symptoms of a mental illness you become this melodramatic inhuman spectacle of misery.

I'm pretty normal. I have hobbies that have no deep psychological justification. I have a family that isn't just pure trauma in a trench coat. I have thoughts of normal sadness, happiness, peace, and anger.

I just also happen to self-harm sometimes.

Again, this section might be problematic and bad but it's just how I feel. And there is no such thing as a "problematic feeling". All there exists are problematic actions.

TO REITERATE, IF YOU DON'T AGREE WITH ME THAT IS FINE. I AM NOT THE GOD OF MENTAL STRUGGLE. I JUST WANTED TO THROW OUT MY OPINION.

sorry for offending anyone :(

[rishere222]

Highschool Romance with Haikyuu Boys

💫Fluff

💫Fem reader

💫This applies to their current timeline in the anime

💫Enjoy Reading~

Tsukishima

Academic Rivals

A tsundere

Doesn't really care about high school romance

He liked your academic skills

He's too shy to admit his feelings tho

Took him four months to get the courage to confess

His love language is buying you books and giving you candy

He also lets you borrow his headphones

Kageyama

She fell first but he fell harder

Lets admit it, this guy is dense af

You're very affectionate and that picked his interest

He runs to you to teach him before an exam

He doesn't know how to confess so his way of showing affection is giving you milk and letting you borrow his jacket

Invites you to watch their game

He never really confessed, the Karasuno team snitched on him so he was forced to tell you his feelings

Akaashi

Soulmates

You grew up together

You help him with his volleyball sometimes

Likes to bring you some hot choco esp if its winter

He casually told you he likes you

Obv you were flustered

Loves seeing you smile so he often pinches your cheeks

When you're asleep besides him, he stares at you lovingly

Atsumu

Enemies to Lovers

You hated his proud ass

He's cocky and borderline annoying

Either way he's kind and gentle to you

Loves to steal Osamu's food and offers them to you

He treats you lunch every single day

Confessed to you over the phone

Loves to carry your bag afterclass

He would ask you to watch his practice then buy you some snacks afterwards

Oikawa

Mr. Popular and Ms. Nobody

Well you are not literally a 'nobody'

You are smart, reserved, and a private person

Oikawa was amazed by the way you ignore his presence

Therefor he made it a mission to let you know everyday that he's 'there'

Summary is he wants your attention

After months he gave up, and you felt bad

Eventually you confessed

He didn't say anything at first, to make you nervous. Deep inside his heart was happy

Loves to take cute selfies with you with a hashtag "MyGF

Bokuto

Black Cat and Golden Retriever

We all know he's the GR

Loves you scream your name before his match starts

Asks you for volleyball advice even though you don't play

Loves to buy you bubble tea

His love language is physical touch

He enjoys giving you random gifts

He shows you off to his teammates and loves to tell everyone that you're his

[amjusttree]

I'd like to take a moment to ramble aimlessly about the potential horrors of assigning a specific image to a specific type of task or person, specifically in academia.

There's an expectation of sophistication, traditionally "high-brow" tastes in literature or film, and even certain speech patterns. In terms of physical appearance, a lot of these elements of "class" are just subtle implications towards wealth. (Blazers, dress-shoes, literal suits at times)

An interesting example of the predetermined image occurs routinely at my school: I am from Texas, my school is northern, I've had classmates express shock that I'm from the south because that's "not what they imagined". I've been asked repeatedly if I struggle to keep up with college level work because southern schools are "behind" academically.

(Fun fact: I had an accent growing up but was encouraged to speak without it, out of concern for being perceived as uneducated in academic settings. I no longer have an accent.)

The very messy point I'm trying to make is that aesthetics are simply aesthetics, nobody is anything 100 percent of the time, and we should not impose more expectations on ourselves when higher education is difficult enough to access as it is without the financial strain of reworking your wardrobe.

This is coming from someone who admittedly commits pretty hard to the aesthetics of it (I have classmates who will literally ask me if something is wrong when I'm seen in casual clothing.) and considers it a major aspect of my identity. I also literally have a Tumblr dedicated to it.

So, to close this off:

-My favorite professor comes to school in sweatpants

-My very serious English professor's favorite movie is the hangover (part three if you were wondering)

-One of the most intelligent people I know wrote one of his longest essays on the morality of SpongeBob characters.

-I literally study to the types of songs you hear at frat parties.

Pursue education in your pajamas, don't force yourself to study to classical music, read silly books from time to time, and don't take yourself too seriously, education is stressful and we deserve to loosen up.

Sincerely,

A girl who had a full blown identity crisis over dyeing her hair blue.

[short-black-diamond]

a maybe obey me request:

the reader is asexual and has gradually gotten along with all of the brothers except Asmo, due to a fear of how overtly affectionate/sexual the demon can be. it’s gotten to the point where the brothers devise a plan to make the reader spend some time with asmo and form a friendship; or if not an understanding that even though he’s a lot, asmo does care in his own way

Ohhhhhh I know that feeling too well my love. I hope that nobody's touching you without your consent, and if they do, call me, I'll kill them nice and slow. <3

I just can't live with the fact that some ppl ignore boundaries and so however they please like bitch can you maybe not touch me?

Your name is MC and you're a sheep in this fic

---

"Don't worry, I'm here."

The brothers felt bad for Asmo.

I mean, sure, Asmodeus was sometimes overly affectionate on purpose, but it seemed that whenever he wanted to hug MC or pat their shoulder or just touch them platonically in any way, the sheep just...looked at him with a frown and a raised hand, muttering a soft:

"Please don't do that."

And Asmodeus always pouts cutely as you walk away, and while you do, you let out a sigh of relief. You knew that Asmo couldn't really...ground his affections and desires because of his position, but he could at least tone it down with the verbal affections.

You nearly had a stroke whenever Asmodeus flirted with you, because it'd always sound sweet and you'd think he was being innocent just this once, before he ruins the mood and builds up your guard around him even stronger when he scooches closer to you with a smirk. Of course, you go away right away before he has a chance to do anything else.

...

"I feel bad for Asmo,", Levi mumbles as he fixates his orange eyes on the screen in his phone, thinking back to the time when Asmodeus tried hugging you after a compliment you gave him, but he instead crashed against the wall as you ran away.

"Me too.", Mammon mumbles as he counts a few coins he found on the way from the school to the house of Lementation. He thought back to that one time where you were forced to sit next to Asmo, who couldn't help but lean into your neck and smell at your fragrance, and you pushed him away with a disgusted face.

Of course, Asmodeus couldn't be mad at you, how would he? He already came to terms with the fact that there were some people in this world that didn't need all that body contact and pleasure, just a small high-five and fist-bump being enough for them to count as physical touch.

"Well, we certainly need a plan.", Satan speaks up as he holds up a book. "I've read that handholding is pretty popular amongst asexual people, because there are many ways to hold hands; interlacing the fingers with each other, rubbing the thumb on the other person's back of their hand, and holding pinkies.", he listed, and Leviathan blushed at the thought of holding hands with someone.

Lucifer nodded. "That's actually a good idea, but how would you like MC and Asmodeus to hold hands when MC quite literally despises Asmodeus' touch?", the eldest brother asked.

Satan raised his hands before he lowered it with a frown. "I-...don't know."

"What if they go to that scary place from the human world?", Beel asked through a stuffed mouth and Lucifer had marks in his temple as he asked Beel to swallow his food before he said something.

Beel ate up his sandwich, before he spoke about his idea. "Since October is slowly pulling up in the human world, they already have decorations for halloween...although it's like, two months too early... but still. I once went with my friends and it was rather scary..", the avatar of gluttony mumbled before he bit into the next closest burger.

Lucifer looked up in thought. "That might actually work...mammon, challenge Asmodeus and MC to go there, I'm sure Asmodeus would accept.", he ordered, and Mammon nodded.

No need to throw tantrums when he wanted MC and Asmo to get closer platonically right? Also he was glad that he didn't have to go to that spookhouse.

...

"A spookhouse? Sounds neat.", you shrugged as you looked at Mammon.

"Eh? Isn't that for younger kids?", Asmodeus asked before he looked at his nails.

"Beel and his friends went there too!", Mammon exclaimed, and for once, Asmodeus didn't hear a lie from Mammon's mouth.

"Is that a bet or something?", the avatar of lust asked, voice laced with suspisciousness towards his elder brother.

Mammon sighed in exasperation before whispering something into Asmodeus' ear. After a moment, the two composed themselves again and Asmodeus acdepted.

...

"AHH!", the blonde screamed in fear as another skeleton fell from the ceiling and nearly right on top of him. you just stood next to him, your hands in your pockets.

'Beel, why didn't you keep the spookhouse to yourself? And why is Asmodeus of all brothers here with me today?', you thought as you watched him close his eyes tightly as he hugged himself.

Now, you felt bad for Asmodeus as well. He really looked like he didn't enjoy it here, and for once, you let your guard down.

"Hey.", you spoke gently after you sat down next to him. He held his ears shut, his legs close to his chest and you didn't like the way his clothes got dirty from all the dust and dirt on the ground.

You slowly put your hand on his shoulder, and he flinched. But you pressed down, and Asmo finally opened his eyes as he had tears in his eyes.

"wanna leave?", you asked, and Asmo nodded. You stood up before reaching out your hand. Asmo looked at you with a face full of unsureness, and the question lingered in the air.

'are you really okay with that?', his eyes asked.

you opened your hand more in yes.

And he slowly brought up his hand, giving you the chance to pull back, but he got the message after your hand held his and helped him stand up.

"Let's get the heck outta here.", you said, and Asmo nodded as he wiped away his tears.

'Holding hands like this...is not so bad.', you and Asmo thought, and for once, his dirty mind was completely gone, instead having a calm and warm and comforting feeling in his stomach when he looked at your hand which was holding his tightly.

so tightly, as if to say: "Don't worry, I'm here."

And with holding his hand tightly, you and Asmodeus went home.

---

bruh I think I kinds messed it up? But I dunno, btw are you okay with handholding? Because i did and i played with the thought of maybe holding pinkies but then it wouldn't be as dramatic you know?

Anyways, I hope you liked it, and if not, tell me and I'll try to do better next time!

Read you in the next post!

[anendoandfriendo]

So like, the idea of a Plural Broken Arm Syndrome happening to us specifically, but also as a more widespread general phenomenon, committed by a plurmisic society, as plurality enters the mainstream, is a very big nightmare for us (not...not literally...although it might as well be literally sometimes, with how often we think about it), but we do not feel it is a baseless nightmare if that makes sense.

This is because we have seen examples of how it could happen already. One of the first things a (bigoted in many, many other ways) coworker asked was "don't you need help for that?" with the that being our plurality. We were lucky in that we had supportive managers at the time and that those managers stamped the plurmisia out fast but, yeah, that was very extreme luck. That luck only continues in a much milder form today, and only because our endogenicity has been so well-established.

We have also seen symptoms of this happening with other neurotypes. As in, we already have problems and traumas with so-called "therapists" — particularly BCBAs/ABA practitioners/autistic conversion practitioners and adjacents — giving us so-called "help" for things that didn't need help — like, you know, our autism.

And we can get into if autism in general needs "help" or not and what kind of "help" might be necessary, but for all intents and purposes, for us, our autism and our being Autistic did not, and does not, need "help" in any way, shape, or form.

Unless you count our one headmate that's so traumatized by ABA that she has thought about cutting her eyes out with something for the mere act of making eye contact with someone. Because the eye contact hurts in an emotional way and makes us physically uncomfortable. Ohohoh!! But just in headspace of course, because that way nobody needs to bother with us right? Because that's less danger to us, because it's not happening to the body. And nobody here could ever go through with something like so to this body, it's kind of the reason we have a job.

But that seems less like our autism needed help, and more like us needing help with some seriously fucked up PTSD or CPTSD, yeah? Hopefully that gives y'all an idea of what we're gonna be talking about here on and off.

Anyways: we have trauma with seclusion rooms and gaslighting us about our calm-ness level at worst. We think there was maybe once or twice it was actually deserved, and the second time was a last-resort effort on Silva's part to get us the fuck out of there and tell the body's parents that something was fucking wrong with these people. We could be reading a book under our desk and be thrown into a seclusion room — oh, sorry — we mean social isolation or "SI" room, assholes. Sassing back at a classmate who sassed us first probably deserves something, but especially not a seclusion room!! These are the same people who, after crying and screaming and throwing shoes at the door for hours, we would tell them we were calmer (after another...fifteen minutes? An hour? We don't know.) of just sitting there debating weather we should just give up or if we should kill the motherfuckers, that we were somehow "not calm" because we had "tear streaks down our face" as in. The tear streaks that have been there for half of the school day. The tear streaks that you caused because you locked us up over being bored because you were forcing us to listen to your boring fucking "class" about a thing we have known since we were three. Those tear streaks. THOSE tear streaks, huh??? These are the same people who would chide the so-called golden rule to us but then tell us "that's not how it works" when we chide back that, if that's the case, then maybe we deserve to have a bit of fun and put them into an "SI room" for three or four hours straight with no way out, no stimulation, and no padding. Like, jeezus christ, if y'all are gonna have a seclusion room can y'all at least not give people asshurt on top of hearthurt and mindfuckery???

These people are from what we term as HFS. This is from when we were eight to twelve years old, bodily speaking. We do not type out the full name, as that might give out too much personal information (just as a general internet safety precaution). We would gladly spit fire into their faces and force them to pay us back in money what they cannot in blood from the veins of every person who has worked there since 2007. Kill them all, we don't care — but that would go against everything we stand for ideologically. We are left with literally nothing to show for this ordeal.

At best, what we had to deal with was like...people giving us toddler-level homework???? on facial expressions and gaslighting us about how to feel about them testing our motor coordination at seventeen years old at best. One idiot who had the gall to try to block the exit door from us, a seventeen year old, as we barely squeezed past her dumb ass. Somehow the body's parents did not notice this. We told them we wanted to be "normal" in an attempt to appeal to the abusive step-mother and somehow landed ourselves into this spot.

This is what we would normally just term "ABA therapy/facility" as it is what most people imagine when they hear the words ABA therapy, even if we consider our other, much worse and much more traumatizing ordeal, even if it was never officially called such, to also be ABA therapy. This is when we were seventeen years old, bodily speaking. We were just about to enter university but we really just needed to milk out/mooch off of the stepcunt for a little bit longer, yeah? So that meant pretending we "want to be normal" or whatever. It wasn't nearly as traumatizing as the former experiences.

We worry, then, people might try to gaslight us (much in the same way HFS and the ABA Facility would gaslight us) into thinking we are traumagenic, because once again, those of the anti-endogenic and sysmed categories, we often find, have narrow minds and tiny hearts, if only that because they want to pretend they are right about everything. Science matters, but so do matters of the heart, the soul, and the stories we tell about ourselves.

How do we know we're endogenic?

Because of Raymond.

And how do we know about Raymond?

Because of Christina Kelliana. The stories Raymond shares and they line themselves up so very kindly, gently, and neatly for us. It's not clean the way something constructed might be, but in the way childhood nostalgia tries to make sense of itself, as itself, as it looks back unto itself.

It's not as if we don't remember the one teacher acting as a human straitjacket...but that was over Autistic meltdowns and it actually made sense to do that during the time period, since that was like...from 2000 or 2001 maybe, going all of the way up to 2007. We don't think people were often trained to handle those things back then, and like, if the fact HFS is still standing and has never made a public apology shows us anything, it's that even if it's illegal now and wasn't back when we were at HFS, we still should not trust them to be obeying the so-called law just because they have closed their doors.

And it's not like we don't remember the spicy barbecue sauce and how upset we were about that, and how Christina switched with someone else over that...not that we would have had the words back then, but one does not simply go from barbecue sauce being spicy to it not tasting like very much at all!

But, we also remember playing HORSE, a basketball game, with Christina and Kelly. There were always four people, and Ricky was always to the side instead of playing. You would literally try to shoot basketballs into the hoops and try to spell HORSE: H-O-R-S-E. That was it, that was the game.

We never did find Ricky in the yearbooks. Or Christina or Kelly. Which never made much sense, until Christina Kelliana popped up, as a sysmiddle, about halfway through our shift at McDonald's:

At first, this led us to believe we were potentially wrong about our endogenicity, but luckily for us, Raymond had been more actively around for some months by then, as opposed to his sitting by idly in curiosity as he had been doing at our university. It helped us clarify the situation. We trust them if only because they also managed to remember several things about an old house in [REDACTED], Illinois, a place that we only lived at until we were two, bodily speaking. He talked at length about the beta fish on the kitchen island countertop, and how they were sad to never have been in a three-story house ever since, and talked at length about the colors of the house, and the neighbor we called Danielle.

It's an interesting person, and has also talked about his memories at length to other systems and -adjacents, if there was any doubt left in our minds about our system origins. Have you ever had another entity in your brain that has a very particular pattern foe everything they do, see, think, feel? Of course you do. If you're reading this far, you're most likely a system or -adjacent anyways.

There's simply too much there that Raymond knows that the rest of us do not, in a very particular way that wouldn't be easily described to a singlet, but might be understood by a system. It's almost like a lock and key, or a DNA test with the fingerprint to match. The way these memories felt to Raymond match, to near perfection, what is portrayed to us. The overlap between where his memories fade and The Haileys' begin is almost uncanny.

We very much remember, and for those of us who do not, we very much have heard about it, to this day: Hailey (Academic) attempting to find some information for the body's mother. It was the password to something important, but we suppose the topic of calendar dates were brought into the equation. She simply turned to Raymond for the information, to which he ended up responding something about monster truck shows. "Hey Hailey, do you know about the monster truck show? Yeah, you do remember the show, I think everyone knows it by now but I think it was then we ended up switching places and I faded into the nether [dormancy]."

He has stated at least once he did "not expect things to go in this direction, and would not have left this system if I had known Hailey(s) would be so fucked up," in what we are guessing is in regards to the above events over HFS and the ABA Facility. He claims one of The Haileys is a semi-parogenic, but since there are so many of them now it gets a bit harder ro verify this one. Christina and Kelliana had been in the nether for very, very long by then and had probably fused by this point. Ricky had faded, literally, and was nowhere to be found at the time either.

So, why are we even trauma-dumping about this, then?

Well, it was probably a quarter way through this but by this point we aren't so much trauma-dumping as we are...explaining. Our opinions, on systems and syscourse, as follows:

Yes, endogenics can have CDDs like DID and OSDD. It's just rarer for that to happen than in a traumagenic system.

We're people and not parts. We think this should be the default, usually, at least when interacting in a singlet-dominant society. We think this way more for the benefits this would offer and how it would make it harder for singlets to be ableist, and not because we think the parts narrative is inherently "bad" or "worse" like some people might assume from us.

Exomemories are real memories. They are not the same as bodily memories though and there needs to be a way to draw certain and specific lines in terms of how we treat them if this is regarding sensitive topics.

That being said...that line on what an exomemory is versus a bodily memory can get very blurry and sketchy extremely fast, and it's not always because of something that is hidden as a cover-up to something bad.

Systems can form for literally any reason. So, too, for side systems and Subsystems.

Final fusion isn't always like death. But it can be, and it is, and it's a very scary thing for us.

People are consistently asking for a "reason" to "believe in" endogenic systems. You do not, and should not, "need" any sort of reasons to believe us. You do not "need" a "reason" to stop being a bigot, to stop gaslighting us, and to stop abusing us out of circles that we might need just because we do not fit the normal definition of what a system is or what the socially traditional idea of dysfunctional means.

When people run around recreating the binary of "endogenic = nondisordered" and "traumagenic = disordered" then they are paving the roadway to Plural Broken Arm Syndrome. You are literally creating the conditions in which it is impossible for us, Rusanya, to thrive. While we point ourselves and our feelings out here as the defining factor, it's only because this post is about how sysmedicalism and binarism are literally killing us. Do you know how hard it is to breathe when someone's hand is pushing your face under the ocean????

You ask us to listen to you, and that in turn you will listen to us. And then you plug your ears in defiance anyhow when we we tell you isn't what you want to be told! You ask for nuance? The nuance is right there, all of the way up, starting at the top of this post hun. It ain't our faults here that we have more nuance to our multitudes than you, it would seem.

[thedawningofthehour]

for the dvd commentary thing - im not sure if it fits under 500 words or if u can even remember what u were thinking since u wrote it like last year , but the scene in arc 1 chapter 8 where draxum n donnie talk abt sun tzu n mythology n names ?

That is...yes, that's quite a bit longer, about 1300, but lucky for you I'm very narcissist and love talking about my shit. (and nobody else sent one in)

“You’ve read Sun Tzu.” Draxum is just looking at him, with a quirked eyebrow and a small smile on his face. For some reason, Donnie’s face flushes. “Well, yeah.” He looks down. “I’ve always loved reading, and it’s not that long. What, did you know him or something?” “He was a bit before my time.” Okay, he’s actually smiling now. It’s creepy. “But his work is quite illuminating.” “I’m surprised you’ve read it. He was a human, after all. A warring human. Aren’t you against that?” “Only fools believe they have nothing to learn from their opponents.” “So you’ll apply that to a two-thousand-year-old book, but not to modern humans?” Donnie tugs on his cuffs. “You know you missed, like, the entire point Sun Tzu was trying to make, right? His entire philosophy was that using violence is rarely the best way to get what you want and conflicts are better solved diplomatically.” “And he also said that when you do draw your bow, to draw your strongest arrow.” “Yes, but only if-” “Do you not think there have been attempts to address our conflict with the humans diplomatically?” Draxum says shortly. “You think you’ve seen the extent of this war. This has gone on much longer than you. Longer than me, even.”

So that took influence from a podcast I enjoy:

The whole thing is a fake talk show radio program from a fictional city with sort a sort of surreal-absurdist vibe going on. (one episode depicts a political debate that devolves into an argument over whether the crawdad people would vote for them and one candidate's treatment of the alligator king, for example) Also not the only reference to this podcast in this fic; this is where Tubby Dan's Barbecue and its various trials Bella mentions are from. He actually has a commercial later on in this episode.

I also have not been able to find the exact quote he uses. This guy might just be trolling me. But I figured, Donnie's fifteen, even if it is a fake quote that's the kind of mistake a fifteen-year-old would make.

“I’m just saying-” “No, you will listen to me on this occasion. Look around you, boy. Think of where we are, think of who we are.” “We’re a turtle and a goat-man in your lab. I can’t really look at much else.” The slap takes him by surprise. It doesn’t particularly hurt, but he feels quite confident by now in how far he can push Draxum before he uses physical force, and he hadn’t reached that point. “The Hidden City is under New York City,” Draxum says quietly. “You have more experience with the world above than I do, so let me ask. Does it feel like New York City?” Donnie shakes his head, his cheek still stinging. “Why do you think that is?” “I assumed it was because the Hidden City is a lot older? New York is only about three hundred years old, and almost everything up there was built in the last century,”

(noooo a typo)

(I literally just went back and edited a nearly year-old chapter right now, it's all fixed dw)

But for real, New York is an infant of a city. I know the Hidden City is under New York because the turtles live in New York, they've always lived in New York-but I wanted it to make sense why.

So my idea was that the Hidden City isn't so much under New York, but that New York was built on top of the Hidden City. They weren't even hidden at first-they just fucking lived there, cohabitating with the indigenous Lenape people, (or at the very least they left each other alone) and adapted when Europeans started their colonizing bullshit, gradually moving underground as more humans showed up and clashed with the Yokai, not understanding what they were. (The Lenape and the original colonizers didn't really know either, but there was an understanding of bro just don't ask questions that was gradually lost as more and more people settled there) Part of the reason it became 'gestures to all of New York' is because of the presence of the Yokai and all their nonsense. So basically-the chicken came before the egg, and the Hidden City is that chicken. Or one of them. You can decide whether they did the fucking or laid the egg.

“You are…correct in that observation, yes. The Hidden City is much older.” Draxum glances off to the side. “But think of what is here. Think of where it came from.” “Well, yes, the culture here is heavily East Asian. Even the name Yokai originated in Japan.” “Think about that. Why are so many Yokai from that area? New York is on the other side of this continent. It is not a simple journey.” “I assumed there was some portal.” “There was, but by design. Why did they come here?” “I’ve met Yokai that are definitely European.” “Very few. Think about why that is.” Donnie glances up. “Fewer Yokai in other parts of the world.” “We were actually more widespread in some areas. Why do you think you do not see our brothers and sisters from the Horn of Africa? The Maghreb? From the islands of the great Pacific? They existed, my boy. Ask me why they are not here.” Donnie is silent. Draxum looks over him, his eyes narrowed and cold. “The Hidden City is the last of its kind. There are no other communities like this elsewhere in the world, not anymore. So I will ask you again, boy. Why are there so many Yokai here from Asia? And why are the Yokai of the rest of the world not here?” Donnie remains silent. “Answer me, boy.” “I understand.” “I want you to say it.” “Humans killed them.” Donnie focuses on the ceiling. 

Another one of those 'try to make the lore of the fucking ninja turtles show realistic' decisions. I know the reason they're called Yokai and why there's so much East Asian influence is because they are Ninja and this is a show about Ninjas and the writers wanted to harp on that, but it doesn't really make sense from a lore perspective.

I mean, think of where New York is. Pre flying, pre Panama Canal, the Far East and New York couldn't have really been more far apart. To get from Japan to New York by ship, you had to sail across the Pacific, down the west coast of both north and south America, around Cape Horn, back up the east coast all the way from Argentina to the fucking northeastern tip of the United States. Or land in Washington and cross the entire continent on foot. (I know they have portals but that's not the point, okay?) Like, unless there was a really big, heavy traffic natural portal from the Hidden City to Japan it just doesn't make sense for that to be the primarily culture. Especially considering the Crying Titan, canonical father of all Yokai, is under New York. If there was going to be a higher concentration of Yokai in any peoples, it would be the native people of North America. Because that's where the goddamn empyrean is flowing.

But we see pretty much no obvious First Nations influence. We get some East Asian and some European, all under a heavily Americanized umbrella. I mean, yes, they did this because this is a show marketed to American children and that's what's recognizable to them, but still. I needed it to make sense.

And it gave me the perfect frame to hang a blood-soaked backdrop.

“So you do understand.” Donnie presses his lips together. “I don’t think all humans deserve to die for it.” “I don’t think so either.” He must look surprised, because Draxum looks down at him, amused. “What? Deserve is a rather heavy word. I’m not speaking of deserving. I’m speaking of survival. Humans and Yokai cannot coexist. One of us will destroy the other. I do not intend to allow my people to languish in the dark while the humans choke us out.”

This is really the cornerstone of Draxum's beliefs. Yes, he's acting out of hatred and anger, but I didn't want that to be his whole thing. That's not as compelling, and Draxum's intelligent enough to need a concrete reason. And I mean...from his perspective, relations with humans have always gone sour eventually. And his people end up paying the price for that in blood.

“What makes you so sure?” “It has been foretold.” “What, like a prophecy?” “Exactly. There is a prophecy that predicts-” “You haven’t read much Greek literature, have you?” Donnie shifts in his binds. “Oedipus? Cronos? Or are those guys too old for you too? Let’s see, we have the Mahabharata. Macbeth. Sun, Moon, and Talia. Have you read Harry Potter?” “What-” Draxum closes his eyes. “Child, what in the world are you talking about?” “Those are all stories of self-fulfilling prophecies. In every one of those stories, the actions taken to avoid the prophecy cause it to come to fruition. Cronos eats his kids because he was told one of them would overthrow him, but that just makes his kid angry enough to do it. Talia is foretold to be killed by a splinter of flax, so her father bans flax from the house. The first time she sees someone spinning flax, she doesn’t know what it is and pricks her finger due to her curiosity and inexperience.” “...Why would a splinter of flax kill her?” “I always assumed there was some context lost in the translation, because that part never really made sense. Anyway, the point is that trying to prevent the prophecy just made things worse. It likely never would have come true, if people had simply done nothing.”

I'd like to call back to Draxum's speech to the Shredder in the finale. He does his big dramatic betrayal because he realizes that the prophecy foretelling the destruction of the Yokai was not the humans, but Shredder himself.

But he conveniently leaves out his own role in that. Draxum brought the Shredder back. Even before factoring in the orb he gave Big Mama, pulling Karai from her hell dimension, even without the work he did recovering the cursed metal-like, even if the Foot got every piece of armor the could get their hands on without him, they still wouldn't have finished it because Splinter had the last piece. And there's no way Splinter would have allowed it to be taken. Even Draxum couldn't defeat him in combat. The only reason Splinter gave it up was to save his sons-the sons that were shown kicking the Foot's ass all episode. If it was just them, they couldn't have captured the turtles. No Draxum, no Shredder.

Which makes the entirety of Rise a self-fulfilling prophecy in itself. In trying to destroy what he thought was the greatest threat to his people, Draxum created the very thing that could end them.

“No, it would have been a regular prophecy, like Cassandra predicting the fall of Troy.” “So you do know your Greek literature!” Donnie almost smiles at that. “Potentially. But far more likely that the prophecy simply doesn’t come to pass, like the thousands of other prophecies that are forgotten. We only hear about the ones that come true, after all. And from a simply mathematical standpoint, some of them must come true.” “I understand what you’re trying to do, and I understand your point. But you are a child playing at war.”

Yeah, he doesn't have a good answer here. So he just dismisses Donnie's point. Reminds me of my own dad!

“Well, maybe you need a child’s point of view,” Donnie huffs, rolling his eyes. “Have you ever thought maybe you’re too far into this to see what you’re doing?” He expects Draxum to call him names again, but he’s quiet for an uncharacteristic amount of time. Donnie turns his head, seeing Draxum leaning against his desk, a very far-away look in his eyes. “I know I was,” he finally says, so softly Donnie almost doesn’t hear him. “But I realized my mistake. I pulled out of it before it was too late.” He turns back to Donnie. “That’s why you’re here.”

A callback to Cass telling Draxum that the armor would kill him. Because really, Draxum's plan was stupid. He barely knew anything about this armor, the Foot, why they were so willing to give him this power. Yet he didn't ask questions. He didn't do any research. He trusted the Foot-humans, who had no love for his people and no reason to help him. Yet he plunged in. He was so enamored with the dark armor's power, so obsessed and blinded by bloodlust that he didn't stop to think about any of this. Not until Cass basically slapped him across the face and told him to snap out of.

And then he realized. He'd almost died-and died horribly, feeding a leashless monster. That was how lost he was in his bid for power. He had a whole-ass personal crisis before deciding to take up kidnapping as a hobby.

Donnie raises an eyebrow. “Kidnapping me was the less extreme option.” “Correct.” “I mean, yes, kidnapping one turtle isn’t as bad as unleashing a literal demon, but like…you couldn’t have found some middle ground?” “You’re my strongest arrow,” he replies simply. And it feels like someone’s dumped ice water over him. “Don’t be angry. I tried to compromise with you. I would have let you keep your name and your family, but you’re the one who refused to meet me in the middle.” Donnie just looks off to the side. “Think about it.” Draxum approaches his table, reaching out and grasping Donnie’s shackled hand, fingers curling around him like a claw. “You’re going to help me protect Yokai and mutants alike. We will do great work together, and when I lead my people into the sun with you by my side, your name will go down in history.” He does a little smile at that, like it’s a pleasant thought. “You just have to tell me what you want that name to be.”

I was kind of hoping someone would catch onto this. At this point, Draxum is still considering Donnie (or rather, his fantasy son who doesn't have a name yet) to be an accessory to his power. Like yeah, he wants him to be revered and rewarded after the fighting is done, but when the history books are written he'd be a chapter in Draxum's book. The next time he mentions the whole 'lead our people into the sun' thing, he says they'll do it 'side-by-side' because he now considers Galois an equal, and as time goes on he will eventually see himself as the person meant to help Galois on his path and set him up as the true savior of the Yokai.

[checkoutmybookshelf]

How Are We STILL the Bad Guys!?

Ok, we are doing a quick and dirty intro here, because I have FEELINGS about this book and we NEED to talk about it. So hi, hello, we do books here and sometimes there is yelling about them. So let's talk Iron Flame.

THERE ARE SPOILERS BELOW THE BREAK. I SPOIL THE END IN LIKE THE FIRST THREE SENTENCES. BE WARNED.

My sister and I read this book together. She finished first, and messaged me to ask if I'd finished because there was a big twist coming. Let me just show you how that went:

XADEN GODDAMN RIORSON MAKES ANAKIN FUCKING SKYWALKER LOOK MATURE, HINGED, AND BALANCED. I DID NOT EVEN THINK THAT WAS POSSIBLE, BUT XADEN GOING VENIN ABSOFREAKINGLOUTLY GOT THERE.

So yeah, Xaden went full venin because apparently he felt Vi's intention to die to get the Basgiath wards back up, and all I have at this moment is "INTENTIONS CHANGE." This is the most twisted combination of Anakin Skywalker going Sith to protect Padme and Romeo Montague overreacting to thinking Juliet is dead I have ever seen. Literally Xaden, intentions can change in a snap, and intention does not give you the situation on the ground. Literally, this is the WORST POSSIBLE CONCLUSION TO JUMP TO when Mira, Brennan, and Vi's squad is there. Literally none of them are going to let Vi kill herself, not even to bring those wards up. Literally this is the worst snap decision from the heart I have ever seen and I spent a solid fifteen minutes YELLING about it to my partner. Nobody should make Anakin Skywalker look like less of a drama llama by comparison. That's too much drama, put some of that back.

I also 10000% stand by my assertion that Mama Sorrengail desperately needs therapy, because while I can get behind mama bears sacrificing themselves to keep their children alive...Mama Sorrengail was going about it in some absolutely hideous ways and frankly? She still forced Vi into a graduate or die military college, and literally no amount of "she'd have been killed by the scribes anyway and this way she'd learn to defend herself" logic makes that better. Also...she REALLY did poor Sloane dirty, and that poor girl is going to need some MASSIVE support and saving because she kinda did not informed consent to murdering Mama Sorrengail to raise the wards. I literally feel worse for Sloane than Mama Sorrengail because Sloane has to live with being forced to kill a woman with her signet and those emotions are going to be COMPLICATED.

Ok, having yelled about Xaden and Mama Sorrengail, I also want to briefly yell about Dain. While it is extremely adult and mature of Dain and Vi to have some conversations and start to emotionally move past Dain's hideous breach of consent in the last book (Seriously dude, you have MEMORY READING powers, consent is more important for you than the average dude and you FUCKED that right up...), I AM NOT HERE FOR A DAIN AETOS REDEMPTION ARC.

I'm sorry, I'm just not.

I recognize that it's the mature, adult thing, and that Dain fucked up and is actively trying to change and improve, but this is a book. I want to just...uncomplicatedly hate the entitled douchebag with sketchy consent protocols. It kind of feels like we only put Dain on a redemption arc to try to put the pseudo love triangle on life support, especially since Xaden has gone full Venin. I know this is only book 2 of 5, so I'm reserving judgement on this for the moment, but I'm still not here for a Dain Aetos redemption arc.

I also was...less than enamored of how Vi's EDS was handled in this book. It was present, but it felt like it had even fewer hard limits and required even fewer accommodations than it did in the last book. On some level that's fine, because she's physically stronger and those muscles will help support her joints and connective tissue, but the book LOST me when Tairn spent a not-insignificant amount of time going "a running landing will break every bone in your body" and then Vi successfully does one *in midair onto another dragon during a battle*. And yes, it was to save a squadmate's life, and yes, adrenaline is a hell of a drug, but...that's literally the opposite of a believeable setup and payoff. Or it got mixed up with the setup and payoff for how fliers choose their griffins, but either way, that's just straight-up sloppy, inconsistent writing on a couple of fronts.

Similarly, I am now OFFICIALLY wondering what this author has against doctors, because between Vi refusing to see any mender (unless she was literally dying) in Fourth Wing and Nolon turning her over to Varrish and being literally complicit in her torture in this book, I'm seriously over here wondering what the hell happened. Like, I have had my share of GODAWFUL doctors and medical trauma, and even I'm like...what the hell happened there? I'm not here to defend asshole doctors, but I would like to just make it very, very clear that seeking medical help when you need it is a very good thing, and judging people for seeking medical care is not a great thing to do.

And yeah, sure, it's technically weakly justified in-universe because Basgiath is about "weeding out weak cadets," but I submit that a cadet who takes longer to heal who doesn't take advantage of healing and mending is an objectively worse choice for strength than fighting through an injury, expecially in a non-combat situation where you're LEARNING and TRAINING. This is possibly my pet peeve; your mileage may vary on this one, but come on. Either Vi's health and EDS is a challenge that requires accommodation or it isn't, and I was getting real "it's a problem when the plot needs it to be" vibes from this, especially in the "learn how to resist torture" class. Putting Vi in the chair felt like the easy choice and I honestly would have loved to see a little more thought in the squad dynamics and a little more poking at those. Especially since Vi made it clear as HELL later in the book that she might have actually broken had one of her squadmates been in the chair. Girl can take a lot, but her thing is "better me than them," which could have been explored a little more.

...It occurs to me that reading this far it might seem like I didn't enjoy this book, which is absolutely not the case. I adored the Sorrengail sibling dynamics and interactions, and I loved everything with trying to integrate the riots and drifts. Also, Rhi as a squad leader was just an OUTSTANDING choice, and if our girl doesn't make wingleader next book I will be furious. Rhi is a phenomenal people person and leader, and she's also a DELIGHT as a character. Ridoc and Sawyer too, even if we get less time with him.

As per usual, all the dragons are wonderful, and I was very much a fan of teenage Andarna making Tairn even grumpier than usual. I wish we got a little bit more Sgaeyl, but it makes sense that we get less of her since we're not in Xaden's head. I also appreciated the hint that we might see some changing dynamics around the riders when Vi speaks directly to Sawyer's dragon to get the dragon to help her help Sawyer. I suspect we shall see a loosening of the dragon etiquette to focus on cadet and rider survivor, since Navarre is a WEE BIT FUCKED if there are more venin than we think there are.

I also want to just...call out how well I thought Varrish was done. If y'all have read chapter 8 of my Polin Fic, Lady Whistledown Returns, you know I'm a fan of a good torture scene. Varrish was UNSETTLING and EVIL and absolutely unhinged, and I thought that the ramp up to him spending five days trying and failing to break Vi was beautifully executed, and the actual interrogation session was earned when we finally got there.

I'm also a sucker for a heroic rescue, and between Xaden and Dain, we ABSOLUTELY got that, so A+ no notes on the leadup to bailing to Aretia.

So overall, I thoroughly enjoyed Iron Flame, and uh...I may have made a tactical error in getting it read within days of the release, because now we've got at least a year to wait for book three. Possibly more, we just don't know yet. But this book is a delightful read, and I am excited for book 3 when it is eventually announced and released!

[msommers]

1, 3, 4, 14, 18 for riya, meredith and ellana!

thank youuuu xoxo we ignore how long this took between forgetfulness and having no braincells xoxoxo // questions about creating your ocs

1) What was the first element of your OC that you remember considering (name, appearance, backstory, etc.)?

RIYA — because we knew the campaign at large would span the 15-year long third blight, the first thing i landed on was the base concept of a character who could grow into the type who would willingly brave that ultimate sacrifice to end the blight when it came down to it. obviously with no guarantee of Give Me That Death It's All I Want or even reaching that point, i was just interested in exploring what type of clown i could force into this inevitable character development. 

MEREDITH — god. it's been so long. it was probably her appearance because i went into origins as a baby da fan and didn't know what to expect. which is kinda funny now because her appearance is the biggest change she’s ever had thru all these years. 

ELLANA — on my second playthrough when i knew at least a little bit of what the fuck i was doing in the setting, i believe the first consideration for her was whether i wanted to double down on my interest in the elven culture in thedas that'd i'd developed during my first run of the game or if i wanted to try focused on other aspects (fairly obvious nowadays that i went with the former). 

3) How did you choose their name?

RIYA — i went back into dms with the dm and turns out i chose the name because of the cute nicknames you could get out of it. so pretty much nailed it first try because riya is iconic tbh

MEREDITH — she's one of my oldest characters which means i didn't do Any research before picking her name, meredith was chosen purely because i've been in love with the name since i first read the vampire diaries books when i was a tween. its meaning being “great ruler” was pure destiny, i'll never get over that discovery. 

ELLANA — default name pretty 🥰🥰 and no i still haven't landed on an extended version of her name, don't talk to me about it i have problems making decisions (someone send help).

4) In developing their backstory, what elements of the world they live in played the most influential parts?

RIYA — without a doubt the fact that mages in nevarra were given an absurd amount of freedoms compared to countless places, i loved that. i believe soon after that i stumbled upon the vague history tidbit that a duchess had donated her “palatial estate” to become the new college of magi because she had a mage daughter, and that became a solid base for the new pc right quick. riya was shaped so fast between that initial concept and these two discoveries it wasn't even funny. somewhere in there i found the grand tourney business, dunno when. 

MEREDITH — okay so take literally every element of the human noble origin story and its plot through the game and there. you got it. the entire laundry list that had me fucking obsessed with mere since the jump because everything there ticks my boxes. the politics, the family ties and history, the kingdom pride, the sense of duty that's matched in intensity only by the inescapable desire to enact justice (bordering on violent vengeance lmao) for your family and people with your own two goddamn hands because nobody else is going to get it for you. also you have a cute dog right off the bat, that rules. 

ELLANA — her creation is so. muddled to me because she was the first character i ever played a da game with, so most of the influential elements likely just popped up in inquisition at some point or other and nothing stands out there. my best guess would be that the vallaslin and god domains played a good part tho, because there being a goddess of motherhood and justice has been huge for her.

14) If you had to narrow it down to 2 things that you MUST keep in mind while working with your OC, what would those things be?

RIYA — it physically pains me sometimes, but the first is that i have to remember just how privileged this woman was and try to reflect that in what she says and how she reacts to things (i took psychic damage when she blatantly was judging every bit of that little village). second would be that i have to remind myself how much pain and trauma is gathering up in this mage, unhealed and unacknowledged, because sometimes i can forget while caught up in all that’s going on just how fucking bad it really is. i’ll go quiet here and there during a scene not because i can’t think of what riya would say, but because i realized something would’ve triggered her to spiral into the negative feelings and all she’d be capable of is a “hm” or clear i want to get the fuck out of here one-liner lmao

MEREDITH — number one is that she’s putting noble responsibilities above all else always, sometimes to the detriment of other priorities and even relationships. second is that “canon” doesn’t matter at all and i can have fun with her story however i want, who gives a fuck. follow the fun and all that. i have to keep this in mind for her out of everyone because she has some Strong negative opinions on certain characters which have some,,,aggressive fans and that held me back for a good while lol

ELLANA — first is that she approaches things with gentleness and empathy 99% of the time, even if it’s not advisable and she has people pushing against it. second is naturally Legacy, because that fuck haunts her past, present and future. she's constantly musing on it for both herself and others, and its influence on her can't be noted enough. i have a vivid memory of pausing the hakkon dlc to repeatedly bash a pillow against my face to let out the emotions i was dealing with because the plot was trying to end my fucking life with ameridan and ellana.

18) What is the most recent thing you’ve discovered about your OC?

RIYA — the first thing i can think of was a few months back with the callout that correctly identified riya’s lowkey desperation to get warden-commander satine’s approval as her having mommy issues. blatantly obvious fact, yeah, but it had gone without being commented on and it took me tf out for a few minutes after hearing it. as you can imagine she’s thriving after each positive response from sending updates sent the warden-commander’s way.

MEREDITH — ooooh, a few things because of that long ass warden sheet i’ve been slowly chipping away at in the docs. i believe the most recent is that i never gave this poor woman some hobbies outside of a minor interest in map sketches, so i’ve been on-off thinking about that for a little while. who knows what i’ll land on, i’m lazy. embroidery was a contender because it's the Classic for noble ladies and also i think she deserves arts & crafts fun, just look at her life she needs it

ELLANA — nothing really, she's been consistent for a long while 🤷‍♀️ closest thing is that i did very briefly revisit the ancient idea that i think she deserves one or a few kids to fulfill her “mama bear” energy to a more literal degree but that's mostly a goof. 95% a goof. maybe 90%. if she ends up w kids at the end of this week i can’t be held accountable-

[theajaheira]

Hi! I'm new here (here being your blog, calendiles fandom, and also just...Buffyverse fandom in general? I haven't been here that long haha) and I finally got around to checking out your work on AO3 and uuuhhh you've written SO MUCH!!! So first of all, THAT'S AMAZING, GOOD JOB!! But second of all, I have no idea where to start reading... Can I maybe get like a rec from you of your top 5 faves? (Not fan faves, but YOUR faves, fics/series you're most proud of, etc.) Please and thank you :)

oh, wow, this is so sweet <333 hello! i have seen your fic in the buffyverse tag and lurked more than once there. expect some reviews at SOME point when my brain will allow me, because you are adding some excellent sapphic/nonbinary representation to the buffyverse in a very lovely way. i deeply appreciate your energy.

as for my top five faves -- i appreciate your specification that they have to be MY top five faves, because i really was about to just point to the braveryverse as smth that i think you personally might like. (not a single straight person, found family, etcetc). but my personal top five is a lil different than the stuff that's the most popular w/ fandom at large. (not by too much though.)

all of these range from "a little lengthy" to "novel-length" but i think they are worth it! and they are also all complete! (except for the first one on the list, which has a sequel in the works, but everything PUBLISHED is complete!)

1. never mind the years of wasted time

so this is my long-standing baby that i am blogging about all the time! it's so important to me! i cannot overemphasize how much this 'verse means to me. it's an improbable little everybody lives/nobody dies au set about three years after canon, and in my heart it does kind of stand as a spiritual follow-up to canon, in that the emotional place that giles starts the story is very much a continuation of the emotional place that he ends canon in. there are so many details within the main fic (what you make) that i cannot pack into a single summary (giles and jenny's eight-year-old son, who she left sunnydale to raise! giles and buffy trying to figure out how to reckon with the concept of giles being a parent to a kid that isn't her! jenny's adoring extended family! a subplot that is literally just all about how giles's parents met and fell in love! giles and jenny's individual baggage from their complicated parents and how that informed the decisions they made with each other and with/for the kids they were in charge of!) also it is impossible to read the fic and come away NOT loving art or alice or nora. nora is literally my url now because i tricked myself into loving her so hard by writing her all the time.

anyway yes! top of my list, this is the thing i am the most proudest of, it is literally novel-length and i have been considering learning book-binding just because i want the physical experience of making it into something that i can hold.

2. as day follows night

this is also long but um, less long? this is The Faith Fic. i don't really know how to talk about it without spoiling it (or if i've already talked about it and spoiled it, or if the tags will spoil it...) but suffice it to say that this fic is about faith right after killing the deputy mayor, and her decision to ally herself with an all-powerful witch. or more like "attach herself." like to the witch's skirts. and hang on while the witch drags her around trying to get her to let go. (this girl has some attachment issues). it's got fuffy it's got fairy tales it's got the force of platonic love being the most powerful force in the world <3 and i think it is the first long fic i ever wrote where i had an outline and a plot that made sense and consistent tone throughout!

3. the tale of princess imogen

FAIRYTALE CALENDILES WHAT MORE CAN I EVEN SAY??? also some background fuffy and tillow bc obviously! anyway this whole fic is about jenny the witch pining helplessly for giles the acting monarch and losing her mind a little when princess buffy lets it slip that he's in love with some dark-haired lady who's constantly hanging around the castle all the time. and then subsequently coming up with a Magic Plan to ruin his chances of ever being able to win this dark-haired lady over, because what if she's bad for the kingdom? what if she's just trying to grab at power? THIS IS FOR POLITICAL REASONS SHE IS VERY NORMAL.

4. illumination

this one is about giles and jenny both realizing that they share the experience of being closeted bisexual individuals in a het-passing relationship & subsequently figuring out how to process this. (so obviously chapter three is pegging. but it's THEMATICALLY IMPORTANT pegging. and if explicit stuff isn't your cup of tea, the first two chapters are totally sfw!)

5. private life

i am actually really proud of this one! this is set in season four and it's about xander walking in on giles kissing a man and having to reckon with a lot of complicated internalized biphobia. i love xander so much. of course he has to make this list. (and this is DEFINITELY the shortest fic on this list lmao.)

also honorable mentions to north star and it's the principle of the thing, which are the fics that i write when i'm not feeling like writing a Big Complicated Interlock-y project, so if you wanna read something of mine that will (uh, someday) be updated and is still in progress, that would be where to go right now until the what you make sequel shows up! north star is essentially a (mostly) scooby genfic that's set in season six where willow resurrects jenny to prove herself to giles, and it deals with the fallout of that. it's the principle of the thing is a super trope-y fic about giles and jenny getting green card married in the middle of season one because that's what you do when your workplace enemy might have to leave :) you propose marriage so he can't :) it's normal :) she's normal :) she's fine :) do not look her in the eye