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#like im not hiding myself anymore. im saying whats on my mind. im taking action to get what i want
bangcakes · 4 months
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zoros-fourth-sword · 9 months
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LUFFY X FEM READER
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{MDNI 18+ only}
This chapter is a 18+ chapter so it contains
fingering, dirty talk, hair pulling, name calling, and more—
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SUB FEM READER x DOM LUFFY
BEWARE MY WRITING SUCKS
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"I can't freaking stand him sometimes I swear" I complain to Nami and Robin while we were tanning on the deck of the Sunny the little shit decided to piss me off by chasing me around the ship with a spider in his hand knowing damn well I’m scared of those creepy things
"That's luffy for ya he tends to get on people's nerves" Nami mumbled into her hands that were under her face as she lay on her stomach to tan her back
I hate him I hate Luffy so much ever since that skinny little shit walked into my life the man has done nothing but make me feel things that I have never felt before and I can’t help but hate him for that im not the type to let my emotions control my body or take over my brain for that matter but when I’m near luffy that’s a whole different story and it pissses me off it makes me feel weak and vulnerable
"And why do you exactly hate him" Robin asked interrupting my train of thought
"Can you blame me look at him" I sigh running my hands down my face referring to the boy that was across the Sunny running around with Chopper and Usopp
"Never mind this conversation 𝗬/𝗡 let's change the subject so you're not in a bitchy mood anymore" Nami mumbled into her hands
"Okay" I let out a dramatic sigh "but let me go change out of this bikini first I'm kinda hot the sun starting to get to me," I say to the girls getting up out of my chair to stretch
“I’ll be back” i say as I make my way towards my room
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I finally make it to my room quickly throwing myself on my bed letting out a loud groan from the cold contact of the blanket touching my sweaty skin
"Hot huh" I hear someone from the corner of my room their voice sounding raspy
I quickly fling myself upwards nearly falling off my bed 
Before I could even scream I heard a familiar yet annoying laugh come out of the person
"I really scared ya huh" Luffy chuckled stepping into the light so I could see him
"What the fuck are you doing in my room Luffy" I snap out nearly turning red from anger
"I don't think that's any of your concern," Luffy said giving me a big smile
Is this boy stupid what makes him think it’s okay to hide in a girls room
"IT IS WHEN ITS MY ROOM LUFFY" I scream standing on my feet and throwing the pillow that was on the bed next to me at him but of course his show-off self had to catch the dang thing leaving me unsatisfied with the fact that I didn't get to hit his stupid face
"Use your brain for once you idiot" I growl out turning my head away so i didn’t have to stare at him any longer
"𝗬/𝗡" Luffy said chuckling out my name
"It is kinda my business when I'm the captain of this ship," Luffy said stepping closer to me our feet almost touching
How dare he use his title against me I swear I’m going to smother him with a pillow while he’s sleeping tonight I can’t believe I have to deal with his shit
"It's My space My room it's a place you go for privacy you know" I growl out ready to just walk out of the room
"Like you care about privacy you talk shit about your captain in front of him" Luffy growled out getting irritated with me referring to mine and the girls conversation on the deck earlier
I instantly freeze up hearing that sentence leave his mouth
"Mhm you didn't think I could hear ya," Luffy said stepping closer to me way to close for my comfort
I gasped out in surprise not expecting Luffy's face to be so close to mine
"I hear everything that leaves that dirty mouth of yours"  Luffy growled out grabbing a fist full of my hair and jerking my head back so my neck was exposed
I squeal out in surprise at Luffy's action I quickly bring my hands to his chest desperately pushing him away
What the fuck is wrong with him
"Why do you hate me 𝗬/𝗡" Luffy mumbled in my ear his lips dangerously close to my exposed neck causing my heart to burst in my chest
"Fuck you Luffy" I growl out punching him in the chest even tho he didn't take damage
Why dose this dude have to be so strong
"That's no way to speak to your captain 𝗬/𝗡" Luffy chuckled out slightly tightening his grip on my hair
I whine out from the pain quickly grabbing Luffy's hand behind my head desperately trying to get him to loosen his grip
"I know why you hate me" Luffy mumbled into my neck his hot breath fanning my skin causing my legs to fell like jello
"You wanna ride my dick baby don't ya" Luffy chucked out once again
A gasp left my lips once I heard that sentence leave his mouth I was in shock I wasn't expecting Luffy of all people to talk like this
"What w- do you mean" I stutter out in shock trying to hide the fact that he was right
"Don't act like you don't know what I'm talking about  I hear you late at night pleasuring yourself while saying my name” Luffy chuckled out darkly
This can’t be real right I’m dreaming I have to be dreaming right now
"Do you want me to fuck that hatred out of you?" Luffy said grabbing my bare my waist with his free hand pulling me closer causing our chest to clash together
I gasp out struggling to breathe from the contact of his skin flushed against mine my brain slightly fogging over with lust letting the lewd thoughts take over
"You do want me to don't ya" Luffy chuckled as he began to leave soft wet kisses down my neck
"Luffy" I sigh out my brain losing control and my body taking over
I can’t do this with him his my captain for fuck sake
"Mhm keep saying my name baby" Luffy growled out pulling my hair tighter while his other hand squeezed my waist tighter
I feel like I'm going die he felt so good against me it felt like my body was going to melt away but my brain on the other was literally screaming at me not to let this happen
"Lu- Luffy we can't" I pant out trying to deny my feelings
"Yes we can baby I know you wanna," Luffy said slowly trailing his hand that was in my hair down my body and towards my ass before quickly grabbing a handful and pushing our hips together placing his thigh between my legs
"Fuck I wine out from the contact of his thigh pressed against my core
"See baby you want to," Luffy chuckled adding pressure to my core
Fuck it
"Yes I want to" I choke out finally giving up and accepting it even tho I know I’m going to hate myself for this later
"Good girl" Luffy laughed quickly picking me up and placing me on the bed so that he was above me between my legs
"I'm going to fuck you stupid," Luffy said in excitement with his signature smile plastered on his face
"Whatever you say" I huff out getting annoyed with his cocky attitude
"I don't really appreciate the attitude 𝗬/𝗡," Luffy said thrusting his hips against my own causing me to jerk upwards
I gently whine out rolling my eyes in the back of my head from how touch-deprived I am
"But one thing I do appreciate is how fucking sexy your tits look in this bikini" Luffy growled out thrusting his hips against mine causing my breast to jiggle from the movement
"God I'm going to fuck you so good," Luffy said as he began to trace wet kisses down my neck and between my breast getting lower as he went
"I can't wait to feel how nice and wet you are for me baby," Luffy said hocking his fingers in the waistband of my bathing suit bottoms quickly jerking them down my legs
"Luffy" I gasped out surprised by his action
"Shhh" Luffy said making me go quiet
"Look at you baby your pussy is so needy," Luffy said tracing his finger between my folds seeing how wet I already was for him
I wine out quickly grabbing Luffy's shoulders to have something to grip on
"You like that huh" Luffy chuckled out lowering himself between my legs
"Got something even better baby I'm going to eat you out like your my last meal and lucky for you I'm hungry," Luffy said before burying his face into my core
"Fuck Luffy" I sob out flinging my head back into the pillow
Did I die and go to heaven
His tongue was working wonders on my clit and It felt absolutely fucking amazing I was on cloud nine the way his rubbery tongue is thrusting in and out my hole was throwing me over the edge it felt like I was going to cum then and there
"Fuck Luffy your so good" I wine out taking a fist full of his black hair into my hand trapping him in his place
"Fuck baby you sound so pretty keep saying my name," Luffy said slightly pulling away to breathe
"You taste so damn yummy 𝗬/𝗡," Luffy said looking up at me with hooded eyes
He looked so fucking delicious and I hated to admit that but hes also doing a fantastic job so I really can’t complain
"Look at how wet you are" Luffy purred out slowly entering one of his long skinny fingers into my core
"Shit oh my gosh” I pant out from the feeling of his skin against my walls
"I could have you for every meal," Luffy said thrusting his finger inside me at a quick pace
This boy is literally going to be the death of me
"Me too Luffy oh my gosh I'll let you do anything" I moan out caught up in the heat of the moment
"Fuck baby if you keep talking like that I might have to make you choke on my dick" Luffy chuckled entering a second finger and speeding up his pace
"Luffy I can't breathe" I struggle between my moans from the overstimulation his causing my body
"That's the point 𝗬/𝗡 but I think you can take it get on your knees like a good girl"
I hope everyone enjoyed Im sorry if it's was bad but let me know if I should make a part 2
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but anyway have a nice day/night♥︎
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what-if-nct · 2 years
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hiiii is it ok if i ask for some advice? im sorry im gonna sound rambly but uhhh i'm 14 and starting high school next year (which i alrdy dont feel too good abt haha) and my (overbearing asian) parents are going to send me to this private lutheran hs instead of the public one i was supposed to go to bc its more upper class and smart (?). tbh i was genuinely surprised that i liked the school, academic-wise, and i rlly liked that i had the space in my schedule to take more fine arts classes (i dont have any in my hs) but like the first thing the principal said to me was that i "needed to learn to be a good christian". a whole hour each week is dedicated to jesus and i just know my atheist ass is going to be uncomfortable asf. first, one of my best friends has a thing for jesus (he says jesus is too hot to be straight 😭) and i cant tell if hes joking anymore, and second, i dont have a problem with people who are religious, but i do when they are flat out hateful and harrassing people from communities they "dont agree with", and i just know the people preaching at this school are the latter.
also rn i am the *only* poc in my entire school, and i noticed there were a lot more asian students and students of color, so hopefully there'll be less kids pulling at their eyes or calling me slurs :D
anyways i not a fan of the fact that "homosexual behavior on or off campus" warranted for expulsion, since i am a *very* queer and bisexual individual. at my current school, i dont really need to hide my gayness bc no one cares, and my teachers are accepting (my homeroom teachers a lesbian lol <33). i dont think i can handle having to hide such a big part of my identity at home *and* at school :( too add to that i really suck at making friends, so being somewhere without people i'm comfortable with, my anxiety gets really bad, and i just shut down completely.
my hs is p rundown (like most public highschools are) and the classes are average at best, so idk man, im torn :( i dont know if i should suck it up and go to lutheran school bc their good academics, or ✨be myself✨ and go to p shitty school :/
i dont know what to do (or if i can even do anything) abt it i just dont feel too good about this :( you've mentioned you went to a christian school, so do you have any advice? even if you dont, thank you so so much for listening to me rant for a moment there <33 i really treasure you and your blog, atp you feel like the big sister i've never had. i love youuuu <333
That is such a sticky situation. Cause maybe you can try to persuade your parents especially since they'll be paying for the private school on top of college tuition in the future, it can be a huge selling point. I know that's how I won in the decision of beauty school over college it's cheaper. And christian and catholic schools are heavily based in religion like it's a huge part of it so if you don't believe in it it can be absolutely mind numbing. I actually didn't go to Christian school, actually wasn't forced to go to church as a child, I was like 11 and for some reason told grandma Christianity is responsible for all the bad things that happened in the world. Which is wild that I even was able to come to that conclusion as a child she just brushed me off. But I did go to church summer camp to be with my friends which my friend and I got scolded for holding hands but she was just leading me through the crowd of people. So that's still unfortunately a huge part of christian beliefs
the thing that really caught me off guard is the homosexual activity off campus can lead to expulsion. On campus like sucks but is expected of a christian school sadly. But off campus in your day to day life is like your actions off campus shouldn't be judged by the school. Like I can't wrap my mind around that. I think since you have a whole summer maybe look for more schools you can attend I remember doing this in middle school because my home high school was an F school so you could choose any high school within a certain range. You'd be really surprised with how many schools are around you I'm assuming you're in the us but I'm sure everywhere has a ton of schools. And look for a school that holds some of what your parents want and also your own values and needs for your education. And maybe your parents seeing you take initiative might be an extra point.
If your parents are deadset on it. I think try to make the best out of it as much as you can usually there's a group of people in the same boat you're in where their parents forced them to be there. Trust me no matter where you go you will always be drawn to those like you every single time. But if you do get the choice of going to the original public school firstly screw every single racist little bitch who does that to you that is horrid I am so sorry you have to endure that. People suck. But you can also learn extra independently I always did that cause I was a bit ahead of my class. But I really think researching more schools in your area would help you find the perfect school for you. I personally was in love with Waldorf schools they're more creative led schools and freer, I wanted to go to one so badly. So figure out the exact kind of education you want like a magnet school, charter school it doesn't hurt to see how receptive your parents will be to it.
I really hope this helped at all and I hope it works out well for you. And Awwww it's so sweet you see me as a big sister, I gladly be your big sister, love you too🌸🌸🌸
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Shuffle your favorite playlist and post the first five songs that come up. Then copy/paste this ask to your favorite mutuals. 💌💜
Ahh thanks for the ask!! This one's from my easycore playlist and I hope y'all like it! I've also included my favorite lyrics for each song bc why not lol
and now it feels like we just can't stop anymore even if we tried
we're not changing the world, we're making it right
whatever you want in this only life, can we just be proud tonight
let me hope now, let me start again, take it away, forget my name
over again, this is how it goes, every story's made before it's told
sad enough to say that alone i could barely light a match, but together we can burn this place down
sorry about the mess but when we team up, team up, we always seem to bring this place to the ground
ive seen the best and worst of you, but we're sticking through
because without all of the ups and downs we've been through
you know that it's true that i could really be sick and tired of you
ive been asleep at the wheel for the past three years and it's too late to wake up
i never thought id live to see my best laid plans crumble right in front of me
is it my destiny to fail, ive been at this for years and to no avail
the universe has spoken and it won't rest til my spirit's broken
so here's to all the years ive wasted, i never thought i could become this jaded
sometimes the people we admire aren't always who they seem to be
they hide behind a facade of smoke and mirrors with broken smiles and yellow teeth
and only a monster would think to use a second chance as a weapon, there's no excuse
i fear my world is under water, and i. can't. breathe.
i fear my world is under water, my fears consuming me
drift away to a place thats not so harrowing
to the back plate of my mind, digging up what's left to find
with the bar set way too high for me, im bound to sink uncomfortably
im tongue tied inside with a little bit of lust mixed in to mold myself this solitude
i live in pretend like im never gonna need a friend again, ill keep myself intact
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emmies-archives · 3 years
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-Public | Hinata Shoyo- 
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fem!reader x sub-timeskip!hinata shoyo 
Warnings: Nsfw, degradation, public sex, masturbation, exhibitionism, voyeurism, punishment, dacryphilia, edging, getting caught, shower sex, implied threesome, 
Summary: Your supposed to pick Hinata up from practice, except he’s made you wait over an hour, and he’s ignored your texts.
WC: 1.7k
A/N: ig im just fuckin thirsty as hell today... also this is unedited bc im lazy, once again, pls ignore typos. 
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-Hinata Shoyo-
Light shone into the car with each person that drove by as they left the parking lot you had been sitting in for nearly an hour now. Practice had ended over an hour ago, yet Hinata hadn’t come out of the gym yet.
It was normal for him to run late, but this was getting out of hand. He hadn’t even sent a single text to let you know what was going on.
Reading the last one you sent asking when he was coming out, a sigh left your lips when you noticed. He’d left you on read.
A part of you wanted to leave him at the gym, for him to find his own way back to your shared apartment; but you couldn’t. As badly as he deserved it, you had other plans for him.
This wasn’t the first time Hinata had done this either, sometimes he’d get so caught up in whatever he was doing he’d forget to even check his phone, let alone look at the time. You wanted to cut him some slack, but you had warned him once before.
Glancing at the doors once more, you took a slow breath in. Waiting for him to come out for one more minute. When there was no sign of him still, you turned the car off, heading towards the gym.
Hunting down your boyfriend was the last thing that you wanted to do, you were exhausted already. Your entire day had been draining, and you only wanted to go home and relax. But there you were, pushing the doors open, only to find the gym empty.
“Hello?”
Your voice bounced off the walls, echoing back to you loudly. Looking around, there was nothing showing anyone was still there, except for Hinata’s bag sitting alone across the room.
Just as you were crossing the gym toward the bag he slipped through a door, eyes wide when he noticed you. It took you a second to process that he was in front of you now, you weren’t exactly sure what to say, but you weren’t happy, and he could tell.
“Shoyo.” You narrowed your eyes slightly, crossing your arms over your chest. The simple movement made him drop his eyes as if he were trying to hide from your intense glare.
“Hi, y/n.” His voice was quiet, much quieter than his normal self. Shifting his weight as he spoke, eyes fixed on his bag.
You didn’t say anything else for a moment, not sure if you should even talk. You couldn’t tell if you were more upset at the fact he knew what he did or not. It was one thing to simply forget to send a message, but him purposefully ignoring your texts pissed you off.
“Are you, um.. are you okay?” He asked, slowly looking you in the eyes, a small look of concern sitting on features.
“I think I should be asking you that, Sho.” Tilting your head slightly, you stared at him waiting for him to explain why he took so long.
“I’m okay. I was just about to come meet you.”
That answer made your blood hot, you could barely hold back what you wanted to say in response. Closing your eyes for a moment, you tried calming yourself, even if was only a little.
“Oh, so you did know I was here.” You spoke lowly, holding him in your stare once more. He stiffened when you started walking toward him, eyes wide as your gripped the collar of his shirt, pulling him to look up at you.
“Are you mad-“
“Don’t pretend to be innocent, Sho. I know you read my text I sent nearly an hour ago.” Your lips pulled back into a sneer when he dropped his eyes from yours once more. Letting go of his shirt you took a step back, reading the label on the door from where he came, it was the showers.
Stepping around him he didn’t take his eyes off the floor as you walked to the door and pulled it open.
“Remember what I said last time you did this?” You didn’t even have to say anything else as you stepped into the hallway, he followed behind you quietly. You knew he remembered, but he probably wouldn’t answer on his own.
Hinata usually got quiet when you were upset, not wanting to make anything worse. He really did try to be good; it was just sometimes he got a little distracted.
“I hope none of your teammates are here, Sho, or they’re going to hear you whining like a little bitch soon.” Your voice dripped with the anger you felt, but it was steady, scarily calm.
Once you were in the showers, you spun on your heels slowly. In an instant his back was pressed against the cold tile, a small shiver running down his back as your hot breath fanned over his lips.
He didn’t want to look at you, but for some reason he couldn’t tear his eyes from yours. Even as you swiftly pushed down his gym shorts, a venom-soaked saccharine smile pulling at your lips.
He wasn’t sure what to do, or where to put his hands. Was he allowed to touch you? He probably didn’t deserve it, but he wanted to. Especially as your fingers wrapped around his slowly hardening length.
If the look in your eyes wasn’t on the forefront of his thoughts, he would’ve felt the burn of his cheeks at your touch, and gaze.
“You’re already pretty hard, Sho. What were you thinking about that got you so worked up?” You asked sweetly, the tone of your voice harshly contrasting your actions as you gripped his jaw, pulling him closer to your face. “Answer me.”
“Um, I don’t know, you’re just so… I can’t explain it.”
You nearly laughed at his answer, it was almost pathetic how he couldn’t resist you when he disobeyed you. It was like he did it on purpose, just so he could have you like this.
“You don’t know.. well if that’s the case, why don’t you get yourself off, hm? A little slut like you doesn’t even deserve me to touch them. Not after you made me wait as long as I did.” You leaned closer to him, your hand tightening on his neck as you did. Letting your grip on his cock go, raising an eyebrow as you waited for him to listen to you.
Slowly, after shutting his eyes for a moment, he gripped himself. Stroking his cock loosely, the blush deepening on his cheeks as he did. He hated this, he knew he didn’t deserve it but he wanted it to be your hand, desperately wanted to feel your touch again. He listened though, saying anything back to you would only make it worse.
“Awe, look how cute you are. Is it embarrassing touching yourself in front of me?” He whined softly when you pushed closer to him, barely brushing against his length as he sped up his hand. Trying to mimic your expert movements, how you seemed to always make him melt as you touched him.
It was nothing like how you did it though, nothing close to the pleasure he felt when your pretty fingers were wrapped around his aching cock, pumping him just right. His eyes fluttered shut, not being able to look into yours anymore.
“No, no shutting your eyes. I want you to see me watch you pathetically touch yourself, I thought you could do it better, or am I the only one who can make you feel good like that, hm?” You pulled away from him when he opened his eyes again, watching as he changed his pace slowing down once more. Trying to find something that felt similar to what he was searching for.
Tears of frustration were starting to prick his eyes mixing with the embarrassment pooling in his chest. You weren’t surprised when they spilled over, slipping down his cheeks. The satisfied grin on your face only pushing his embarrassed crying further, needy whines slipping from his throat, but he kept stroking himself. Eyes screwing shut once more as he tried to stop the tears from coming.
You were about to say something else, maybe let him stop when you were interrupted. The loud creaking of the door opening sounded once more, followed by loud heavy footsteps.
Hinata’s eyes flew open, and he looked to you with wide eyes, you only smiled and moved closer to him, enough to shield him if needed.
“Hinata! You in here?” A loud voice called out, and you recognized it almost immediately. Not even giving him a chance to respond, Bokuto stepped around the corner. You moved away from Hinata again, giving Bokuto a clear view of him.
“Hey, Bo.” You smiled at the larger man as if there was nothing going on, his wide eyes flicked between you and Hinata several times, trying hard to not look at the redhead’s hand.
“Y/n, what are you doing in here?” Bokuto’s voice was quiet, nearly a whisper when he asked it.
“Teaching Hinata a lesson. You wouldn’t happen to know why he was here so late, would you?” You asked slowly, raising an eyebrow when Bokuto shook his head rapidly, you definitely didn’t believe him. Especially with the blush that spread across his cheeks. “Hm, well you’re free to stay if you want. I’m sure Hinata wouldn’t mind, would you baby?”
Hinata let out a shaky breath, like he had been holding it in since Bokuto arrived. Forcing himself to look at the tall man, barely meeting his eyes. Shaking his head, he didn’t quite trust his voice yet, not with the obvious tent growing in Bokuto’s shorts.
Seeing Hinata with his head tilted against the tile, tears spilling down his cheeks as he gripped his cock, it was something he thought he’d never see. Bokuto could hardly look at you now, there was an edge in the tone of your voice he’d never heard before, it scared him slightly.
Raking your eyes down Hinata’s form, you shook your head slightly, catching his attention once more.
“I didn’t tell you to stop, Shoyo. Show Bokuto just how much of a slut you are, and maybe I’ll think about touching you myself, okay?”
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tags: @bummie @beelziee @bunny-xoxo​ @ultimate-astridwriting
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smutsonian · 4 years
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the mobster’s little girl
pairing: mob!steve rogers x reader
summary: what happens when the big bad mobster gets blackmailed by your father to marry you? (kind of fluffy kind of not. kinda dark kinda not.)
warnings: smut, violence, death, obsessive behavior kind of, poorly written smut (for real i skipped some), innocent reader (kind of?), lil bit of angst, drowning, accidents in the kitchen, reader getting burned, not proofread, a lot of mistakes for sure (It’s a long fic and im too lazy to find the mistakes), loss of virginity skskks, oral deed (f & m), fingering skksks, kind of a handie, please let me know if i skipped some, please read at your own risk, rumlow is a warning periodt, this has crack vibes i swear idk what i was typing at some point, ddlg? (is this ddlg? jesus fuck idek anymore), dub-con but like not really?, the POV gets fucked up towards the end so goodluck with understanding this piece of sheeet
word count: 11k (what da actual fuck? this is loooong)
a/n: df am i being awkward while writing them warnings for? Holy shit that’s a long list of warnings
big thanks to @buckys-forgotten-plum​ for helping me edit <3 luv u mwah
this is a combined request of a mob!steve x innocent!reader + steve teaching reader to suck his ding-a-ding-dong
this has a sucky ending. i hate the fucking ending. 
also, i don’t got no clue on how to do spacing on tumblr so im terribly sorry for that.
masterlist
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Maybe it’s because they were terrified. Maybe it’s because they know what’s out there and what evil lurks in every corner of the city. Whatever the reason is, her parents hid her from the outside world. Never was she able to step another foot out of the gates of her home. No matter how huge the mansion her parents keep her in, it still feels small and lonely. Instead of the friends that she should’ve made in kindergarten, she became friends with her parents’ employees. Instead of the high school friends that she was supposed to have, she has the few cleaners in the house. She didn’t feel like they work for her because they’ve become her friends that keep her sane for being in one place for her whole life. Being able to go somewhere that’s not the garden, the gazebo, or even the lake that became her favorite place has always been in her mind but never her heart never really demanded to go out. She gets curious at times but it’s not enough to make her go against her parents’ number one rule.
 “Never let yourself be known and never talk to anyone outside this house. If possible, keep yourself away from the entrance gates.”
Being the obedient daughter you are, you followed that rule without question. You became the daughter that your parents wanted you to be. You learned everything from your tutor. The basics of economics but mostly proper etiquette. You didn’t know why you had to learn those but you did what your parents wanted you to do without question. You always do…
 That’s why when your parents told you that you were to marry, you agreed with a little bit of hesitance. “It’s for the best, princess.” Is the only thing that your father said while your mom looked at you with a small smile. You thought that it was going to be like the ones in the movies. You imagined a magical wedding but you didn’t even have one. You were told to sign some papers and just like that, you’re married to some man you don’t even know. A man that you didn’t see until a few days after the signing of papers.
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  Steve never felt so disrespected in his entire life. He’s so used to being the powerful man of the city, the country even, that never did he expect some feeble man to come barreling into his business. The Y/L/Ns… He knew of them but he knew little about them. The family is so secretive but are known to be powerful. Nobody knows how they do it but now he has been graced to learn how.
Blackmail… Along with bribery. How fucking pathetic.
He didn’t know how the man managed to acquire his plans for a rival gang but somehow, the fucker did. The rival gang that he was trying to take down for so long and managed to make a plan of action until this fucker messed everything up. The bastard wanted to marry his daughter off to him for a powerful alliance. Saying something about how both of their names would benefit from the marriage. The bastard also promised a fat amount of money that he’ll receive once he marries his daughter. The bastard knew that money has always been a problem for him by the smug look on his face. 
“It’s simple. You provide us security, we give you money. We seal the deal once you sign the papers to be my daughter’s husband.” The old fucker says with such pride in his voice. Steve gritted his teeth before making a move to toss the man out but the fucker clicks his tongue at him. “Ahh, we also wouldn’t want Rumlow to know about your plans on attacking his turf a fortnight from now, do we?” The old fuck stares at him as he waits for his answer.
 Having no other choice, Steve says yes with flared nostrils. He glares at the way the man smiles giddily while walking towards the door. Before the old man could leave, he turned back towards Steve with a serious look before pointing a finger at him. “One more thing… My daughter will be your wife but you are not to touch her. You live at the mansion with her but you ain’t allowed to touch her. Do get out of her way as much as you can. You get all the money you want by following my orders. That easy. Nice dealing with you.” The man was out the door in an instant as Steve glared at the closed door before picking up a wine glass from his desk and throwing it against the door.
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   “It’s a bit weird, mother.” Is your reply when your mother came to visit you in your room and asked you about how you’re feeling given your situation. She continues to brush your hair with her fingers as she hums in response.
 “It’s not like the ones in movies, that’s for sure.” You joke, earning a chuckle from your mother.
“My situation… It’s not really normal, correct?” You pull away from your mother’s hands and turn to look at her. She lets out a sigh before turning you back around and resuming to play with your hair. “No…” She says. “We might have been a bit strict with you but we only did it for your safety. The world out there… It’s not safe.” She continues. Once again, you pull away from your mother to fully give your attention to her. “But you and father are always out there. You put yourselves in danger on the daily so why can’t I?” You look at your mother who was looking at you with an unamused expression. You let out a sigh before sighing. “I know... I know. It sounds a bit silly to ask myself to be put in danger… But what about marrying me off to some stranger! You told me that father is bringing him here after he signed the papers. He’s to live here with all of us. Mother, we don’t even know him. Why would you let a stranger into our home?” You reason out, making exaggerated hand gestures to back yourself up. When your mother makes no effort to respond to you, you retort with a scoff and an eye roll. 
“You’re so hell-bent on keeping me inside this place, claiming that it’s to protect me that you failed to realize that you’re putting all of us in danger by letting an unknown man live with us. Seems kind of idiotic to me.” 
��*SLAP*
 You look at your mother with wide eyes as you hold your left cheek as it is stinging in pain. “I-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. That was disrespectful of me. I’m sorry.” You scrambled to get away from your mother, ignoring her calls as you left your room to run down the long hallway and down the flight of circular stairs. You went out of the mansion and started running down a pathway towards the lake. You were so upset and focused on getting to your destination that you didn’t see a strange man coming out of a black SUV just as you walked out of the mansion.
 You ran down the wooden dock, frowning at what you had said to your mother. You couldn’t believe how you acted just now. First, you disrespect your mother. Now, you hide yourself away like a child that got reproved for the first time. You clicked your tongue in annoyance, an action that you got from your father, as you paced around the wooden dock. “Of course, they were just trying to protect you, you stupid idiot.” You hit your forehead with your palms over and over before tilting your head backward to stare at the sky, not caring at how your eyes hurt at the blinding sun. 
 You closed your eyes after a few seconds, sighing out as you figured that you should probably go back. Your so-called husband was supposed to arrive today. You start to walk back when your foot slipped and suddenly, water enveloped your body. 
 You fell into the lake.
 You would think that being locked up in a big mansion would give you a lot of time to learn how to swim but with your luck, no one ever thought you how so now you couldn’t do anything but drown.
 Your arms flopped around you as you kicked your legs all over the place just to get some air down your lungs but you only found yourself sinking further down. You couldn’t even scream for help because you know that if you did, you would only be swallowing a whole lot of water. 
 Before you could lose your breath entirely, something grasped your flailing hand. You would’ve screamed if you weren’t pulled out of the water. Turned out, it was a hand. Not some kind of creature from the fantasy movies you’ve watched.
 You were sitting on the wooden dock, gasping for air when the sound of an annoyed huff caught your attention. You tilt your head up to see a man looking down at you with an annoyed expression. Your brain started clicking and then it hit you. He must be your husband.
 “You’re here early.” You whisper, looking down. You weren’t sure how to act around him. Around your husband. You would base it on the movies you’ve watched but so far, those movies were nothing like your life. You were sure that if you tried to act like one of the characters there, you would look like a complete buffoon. 
 “So glad to know that I’m married to a dumbass.” He cuts your thoughts off with a sneer. 
 “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to fall and drown like that.” You remember the lessons you had. About not engaging in someone else’s hostility. You looked down in embarrassment. You’ve never been called something vile like that so you must’ve made him really upset. He scoffs before shaking his head and leaving you on the wooden floor as he walks away.
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After that encounter with your so-called husband, you never really saw him again, even though the two of you were living in the same house. It was a few weeks after the drowning incident and you made sure to not tell anyone about it and you only hoped that Steve (you had to learn his name from your mother) didn’t tell anyone about it either. You and your mother are in good terms again and she’s currently in your room again, telling you how she and your father are to spend a few months in Prague to deal with a few business hiccups. You didn’t bother to ask if you could come with but you did bother to complain about them leaving. “You’re leaving me alone with a stranger under the same roof as me?” You exaggeratedly widened your eyes at your mother. “Oh, stop it. I’ve gotten to know Steve myself. I’m sure you’ll be safe with him. He seems like a nice guy. Although, I think your father gets a little bit on his nerves.” Your mother giggles to herself and you look at her with an amused grin. “You’re closer to my husband than I am with him.” You joked which earned a sympathetic look from your mother.
 “Talk to him. He’s your husband after all.” She caresses your face. You hold her wrist as you push your cheeks towards her hold. “I’m pretty sure he hates me, mother. I have a feeling that he’s scrupulously avoiding me.” 
 “How about you bake him something, hmm? You’re wonderful at baking!” Your mother grins at your excited reaction to the mention of baking.
 “I do love to bake…” You hummed in thought before giving your mother a faux pointed look. “Alright, I will bake but only because I love to bake. So if he doesn’t want to socialize with me, then so be it. I wouldn’t care.” You huff proudly as your mother looked at you with a grin and a hint of playfulness in her eyes.
 “What is it?” You ask her.
 “Why do I get the feeling that you want to impress Steve?” She chuckles at your stunned expression.
 “You have completely lost your mind, mother. Haven’t you got a plane to catch? Go on. Say hello to Prague for me!” You push her out of your room, her laughing at your antics before placing a kiss on your forehead and leaving you to yourself.
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  “Ooof!” You hissed as your finger touched the hot tray when you were pulling it out of the oven. You were making the third batch of cookies and somehow, you managed to burn your finger now. You quickly pulled the mittens off before putting the hot finger into your lips, as if sucking the pain away is possible. 
 You heard footsteps coming over and when you turned your head, you saw Steve looking at you with something you couldn’t comprehend. “H-hey.” You pulled your finger out of your mouth before hiding it behind your back like a kid. You tiptoed over the counter to reach the plate of cookies before walking over to him. “I made cookies. Would you… like to try some?” You moved the plate closer to his face but he only scowled at you before taking your right wrist and surveying your hand. He found the finger you were sucking on earlier and muttered something under his breath. You thought you heard him say ‘dumbass’ again like the last time.
 “Put cream on it.” He grumbled before leaving the kitchen. You glared at his back until he turned back around, making you wipe the glare out of your face before smiling bitterly at him. He walked towards you with a dark look until he was inches away from you. The position you two are currently in made you realize how tall he is. How he’s towering over you and how his biceps are poking out of his shirt. His crystal blue eyes are staring deep into your soul and you were almost hypnotized by it. You gulped in nervousness. You remember all the things you told your mother about this certain stranger that could possibly be a danger to you until he smirked and took the plate of cookies from the table before walking out once more, leaving you gaping at the door in confusion as your heart was beating faster than normal. From fear or something else, you do not know.
 ----
 Steve was deep in thought as he chewed on the cookies she made. It was really delicious and he hated that he liked it. He did his best to avoid the girl. He’s trying his best to avoid the girl. He did his best to hate the girl so things would be easier for him. He’s trying his best to hate the girl. He didn’t have time to babysit her. Her father is not someone he wanted to have ties with but he is. Steve didn’t want anything that has to do with that man and that includes her.
 But why is it so hard for him to keep her out of his mind?
 The first time he saw her, she had that cute little frown on her face but he found his heart skipping a beat at the sadness in her eyes. He knew he would regret following her but then he didn’t. He saw her as she fell down the dock and he didn’t know why he felt like his world stopped when he saw her gasping for air but it did. It took him his best efforts not to just dive into the lake to save her. Instead, he took her flailing hands and easily pulled her out of the waters. He wanted to keep her warm when he saw her shivering on the wooden floor but he suddenly remembered the deal. His worry was quickly converted into anger and annoyance so he managed to leave her alone, something heavy in his chest as he walked away from her.
 He hated the way she made him feel so he avoided her like a plague. Their home was big and avoiding her was really easy. It was stopping himself from going near her is the hard part. Her mother is the total opposite of her father. Her mother is a nice woman and living with the Y/L/Ns didn’t feel like a job other than her horrid father. Steve got to learn more about her through her mother. She talked about her so dearly. Steve felt his heart fall at the mention of her not leaving the mansion. It sounded like she was an animal caged in better surroundings. Steve realized why she acted so differently when he’s watching her. She seemed so… innocent. 
 Then he caught her baking cookies. It took him his best not to run towards her when he heard her hiss in pain. He watched as she tried to hide her injury from him. He didn’t know if he found it cute or annoying because she shouldn’t hide injuries from him. From anyone. If she was injured, she should get it to check as soon as possible. Then she offered him cookies. Steve swore that his heart leaped in adoration but he took the offered plate in front of him as a chance to check on her hand. He observed her fingers, internally flinching as he saw the burnt area on her index finger. “Such a clumsy little girl…” He muttered under his breath. Steve caught himself though. Why was he so worried about her? He quickly composed himself and dropped her hand. Before turning to leave. He heard her huff and he couldn’t help but to chuckle at that. He turned around to see her frowning at him only to have her eyes widened in surprise. She gave him a stubborn smile as he walked over to her, teasing her and testing her to see where her cuteness could go. Where her STUBBORNNESS could go. Did he really just say cute? 
 When he thought she had had enough, he smirked and took the plate of cookies before leaving.
 The plate of cookies that he’s currently munching on. 
 The more Steve thinks about it, the more he’s realizing that he couldn’t keep her out of his mind. It was impossible.
 The more he sees her, the more he wants to be with her. The more he sees her, the more he wants to protect her because it seems like she has a way of putting herself in danger.
 So innocent.
 So pure.
 He wanted her and he didn’t know if he could control himself anymore.
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  A week has passed and things with your husband seemed to have gotten better, if one is optimistically speaking. 
 He no longer avoided you so that’s better than before. He doesn’t acknowledge you much though. He only speaks to you to correct your every move. Called you out when you were walking barefoot around the mansion, mocked you when you walked around the docks, and even demanded you to leave the kitchens alone because according to him, you don’t know how to properly use it.
 He only ever opened his mouth to speak his mind of his distaste towards you and you were starting to miss the times when he completely avoided you.
 But you ignored the insults and kept your head high up. You aren’t going to sulk. Especially not when someone’s clearly made it his goal to make you feel just that.
 That’s why you’re currently making pasta. Ignoring his demand and continuing on having adventures in the kitchen. You just finished making the sauce so now you just have to cook the pasta. You took a pot that was way bigger than your head and proceeded to fill it with water from the sink.
 You struggled to carry it over to the stove, letting out a relieved sigh once you managed to set it down. The problem though, the bottom of the pot somehow got stuck on the burner plate. You clicked your tongue in annoyance before grunting and attempting to pull on the heavy pot. It remained stuck so you exerted more effort, succeeding but managing to tilt the pot towards yourself. You let out a yelp as the cold water inside the pot spills all over you. 
 “Y/N!”
 You felt his hands before you heard his voice.
 ——
 Steve heard clanking noises from the kitchen and he just had to roll his eyes at the thought of her prancing around the kitchen. Didn’t he tell her to leave the kitchen alone? He’s just trying to stray her from the harm she could put herself in. Not that he would ever admit that out loud.
 He walked into the kitchen, just in time to see water spill over her from the boiling pot. His blood went cold as he felt his heart stopping. “Y/N!” He rushed over her knelt body, covered in water. He cautiously touched her face, being careful not to hurt her possibly burnt skin. Why can’t she just listen to him? He told her not to work in the kitchen for a reason. 
 As he touched her seemingly cold cheeks, he watched as she looked up at him with an innocent confused look. “Steve?” Her voice was so meek yet it made his ear start to ring as his heart started to beat back to life. She must’ve seen his frantic expression because her eyes widened in realization before she’s shaking her head and pointing at the fallen pot. “I haven’t boiled the water yet! See? I’m fine. I didn’t burn myself.” She had the audacity to smile cheekily at him and he didn’t know if he should be leaping in joy with her or reprimanding her for being so careless.
 Steve clicked his tongue at her, something that he must’ve picked up from her, before leaving the kitchen with a huff. Something that he’s been doing a lot whenever he’s with her.
 ——
 After he left, you took a seat on one of the chairs, recalling what just happened a few moments ago. He thought you were stupid enough to pour boiling water all over yourself. Does he really think you’re that stupid? He looked so worried though. You smiled at the thought of him possibly caring about you. 
 You let out a short squeak when you felt something falling at the top of your head. A towel. Steve wrapped it around you until your head was the only part exposed. “Whatcha grinning on about, little girl?” His voice was stern but there was a teasing tone in it. You looked up at him as he watched you. You shook your head before furrowing your eyebrows when he bought the pot towards the sink, filling it with water.
 “What are you doing?” Your voice is small as you asked him.
 “Can’t trust you with this. You might boil yourself the next time you even try.” He clicked his tongue before effortlessly bringing the pot to the stove and lighting it up. After that he walked back towards you and sat at the chair beside you, turning himself to stare back at you.
 “I thought I made it clear when I told you not to work in the kitchens?” He mockingly tilted his head before raising one eyebrow at you. You stared back at him, not knowing what to say so you just tilted your head down like a chided kid. 
 “Uh uh uh…” You felt his long fingers under your chin as he tilted your head back to face him. “What’s the matter? Did you manage to burn your tongue as well? Hmm?” You didn’t know why but the way he was talking to you is making you feel something unfamiliar in your stomach.
 When you didn’t answer, he put the hand that was on your chin to the side of your mouth, his thumb brushing over your bottom lip. Your eyes fluttered when he managed to poke his thumb into your mouth and pressed it down your tongue gently.
 “Seems pretty alright for me…” He mumbles. You watched as his eyes widened in surprise when you sucked on his thumb absentmindedly. You realized what you were doing and stopped immediately. “No. No, don’t stop. Do it again.” He watched you with bright eyes as you hesitantly sucked on his thumb once more, feeling your body warming up at the current situation. 
 He slowly pulls his thumb out before rubbing it around your lips and leaning his face closer to yours. You could feel your heart panicking in fright or in excitement, you weren’t sure. You saw him close his eyes before he let out a sigh. He pulls away from you then ruffles the towel on your head. “Why don’t you go ahead and put dry clothes on? I think the pasta’s ready.” He grins before walking back toward the stove to start preparing the meal.
 You stumbled to your feet, mindlessly walking towards your room with a clouded mind.
 What was that all about?
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  All Steve could ever think about was her. Her beautiful lips. Her eyes that glisten with innocence. Her nose twitches whenever she’s focused on something. The way she fits in his hold. The way she reacts under his touch. 
 He couldn’t forget about the way she sucked on his thumb unknowingly and the way her eyes became hooded from his touch. It’s obvious that she had no idea what was happening and what she was feeling and that only fueled his hunger more.
 The thought of her being hurt made him furious. It made him protective. He wants to protect her at all costs because not even the ends of her hair should get hurt. No. Not on his watch.
 Steve couldn’t take her out of her mind even if he wanted to. That’s the problem. He doesn’t want her out of his mind anymore. He doesn’t want to avoid her anymore.
 Steve accepted it. 
 He knows that he wants her and he knows that she’ll be able to have him wrapped around her precious little finger if she wants to. 
 He realized how she has a tight hold over him without even knowing it and he’s accepted that fact. 
 He���s ready to do everything for the girl and she doesn’t even know it. He’s ready to give her everything he has and everything he is. 
 He’s ready to give himself completely to her. Of course, it is if she’ll have him.
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  After that encounter with Steve, you finally followed his instruction and stopped trying to make various meals in the kitchen. 
 You were craving cake so you asked one of the cooks to bake you a cake. That’s why there’s a whole cute pink cake in front of you at the kitchen counter. 
 You’re currently staring at it, thinking it’s too precious to destroy and eat but after a minute of your mouth watering, you give up and run your index finger on the sides until it is covered in icing.
 You licked your finger before sucking on it and humming at the sweet taste of the icing while your eyes are closed. When there is none left on your finger, you take your index and middle finger before sliding it on the sides of the cake to gather twice as much as the previous one.
 Your eyes are closed and lips parted slightly apart, ready to suck on your fingers one more time when a hand grips your wrist. Your eyes fly open to see Steve holding your hand while he’s looking down at your face with a boyish grin. Your eyes widened for the second time when his tongue darted out of his mouth and started licking the icing off your fingers.
 He was staring at you as he continued to lick the icing and you were starting to pull away when his lips parted wider to start sucking on your fingers. You’re frozen in shock as your eyes twitched at the sight of him sucking on your fingers. 
 You feel your heart drop when he starts groaning against your fingers. The unfamiliar feeling in your stomach made itself known again and you bit your bottom lip anxiously at the strange feelings you always get whenever Steve’s with you. 
 Your eyes follow Steve’s lips as he pulls your fingers out of his mouth with a silent pop. He looks at you with a smile before furrowing his brows. “Did you bake this?”
 “N-no! I had someone to bake it for me.” You’re quick to let him know that you didn’t make the cake. He smiled again and you just realize how giddy you feel when you’re able to make him smile like that. 
 “Really? So you finally listened to me?” He chuckles when he sees you nod shyly at him. “Aren’t you a good little girl.” He cooes before looking at the cake with a smirk. “This cake is really delicious…” He leans back to stand straight and you nodded at him in agreement. “I wonder…” 
 You let out a loud squeal when he suddenly puts his hands under your arms before pulling you up and sitting you down on the counter. You look at him with a stunned expression. “Wha—“ 
 “But I bet you taste better than this cake.” You couldn’t respond because he immediately connects his lips with yours, making your eyes pop out in shock as he continues to attack your mouth. You let out a small whimper when you feel his tongue pushing past your lips and roaming around the inside of your mouth, tickling the roof of your mouth.
 You start chuckling against his lips and he stops, looking at you in confusion. “You’re tickling me…” You point at the top of your mouth and Steve’s frown turned into a grin. His hand found their ways on the top of your knees and then he’s pushing them apart. “I know a place where I can tickle you... I’m sure you’ll like it.” He pulls you closer to him so you slide against the counter. He carefully pushes your shoulders until your back is laying on the cold kitchen counter. You feel him hiking your skirt up and pulling your underwear down before he sets your feet back on the counter, knees bent, and far apart. 
 You could feel him breathing against your skin and you could feel your body running hot while the hairs on your body stand in attention. You feel something wet run against your skin and you yelp as you sit on your elbows, looking at Steve alarmingly. His face was just in front of your core and tongue is just retreating your skin. 
 “Wh-what are you doing, Steve?” You bite your lip as you watch him stand up until he’s face to face with you. “I’m trying to make you feel good, baby. Do you trust me?” He presses his lips against yours and pulls away, waiting for your answer.
 “I don’t know…” You admit, stomach dropping at the sadness that flashes over his face.
 “Then let me show you that you can trust me. Can you let me do that?” He looks at you and smiles when you nod at him. He presses his lips on you once more, pushing you against the kiss until your back is back on the counter. He pulls away, pecking you one last time before going back to press kisses in between your legs.
 He licks up your skin, hands pressing down on your hips when you begin squirming around. You feel his mouth sucking on the bud before flicking his tongue over it. He doesn’t stop until you’re whining under him, unsure if you want him to stop or to do something else.
 “What do you want, little girl?” He breathes against your core, making your legs shiver at the sensation. 
 “I don’t know…” You whine, eyes staring at him as he stands over your body. He raises his right hand, fingers fluttering in display as he gives you a questioning look. “You want me to use this on you?” You could only nod in desperation because the feeling of emptiness when he pulled away from you is becoming too much.
 “Good girl.” You hear him whisper before going back in between your legs. You feel his fingers playing with your bud instead of his tongue and it feels overwhelming when he uses his tongue to press it against your entrance. 
 “Mmmhm” You close your eyes in delight as he continues to play with you. The familiar feeling in your abdomen makes itself known once again and this time, it’s stronger. You need more.
 “P-please…” You mutter under your breath, pulling on Steve’s hair to catch his attention. He looks at you with a proud smile before asking. “What is it? You need more? Want me to put my finger inside you, is that it?” 
 ——
 Steve smiles when she nods her head eagerly. So innocent, can’t even tell him what she wants. What she needs.
 He rubs on her clit a few more times to wet his fingers before lining a finger against her slit. He looks back at her as he starts pushing the finger in, slowing down when her hand grips her arm. 
 Steve groans at the tightness of her walls against his finger and starts to slowly pump it as he watches her face contort into a pleasured frown. When he feels her loosening up, he adds another finger that earns a low moan from her. Steve stiffens for a second when he feels his pants getting tighter in the crotch area. His cock is begging him for attention but he pays no mind, focusing on the angel in front of him.
 He spreads his fingers apart inside of her as he leans down to start flicking his tongue against her clit, smirking against it when her thighs shiver against his head. He feels her breaths starting to become uneven and he knows that she’s just about to cum so he doubles his effort, sucking her clit harshly and curling his fingers inside of her.
 Her back arches off the counter and Steve hooks an arm under her to pull her up and press her against his chest. She shakes against his hold as he helps her get through her high. She slumps against his hold, head falling down the side of his neck. 
 Steve tilts his head to look at her face, eyes hooded and forehead sweating. She looks so adorable like this. “That cake gave us such a rush, huh?” He chuckles before hooking her legs around his torso and hugging her body close to his. He feels her dozing off as he carries her to her bedroom. 
 He lays you down on the bed and tucks you under your blanket before studying your face. So peaceful. So relaxed. A smile forms on your face and Steve finds himself smiling as well.
 “Goodnight, my sweet little girl.” He presses a kiss on your forehead before walking out of your room. 
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  It’s currently four in the afternoon and Steve is currently sitting on a couch in the massive living room, thinking about the night he has planned for him and his little girl. 
 After that time in the kitchen, things have been great with them. It’s been a few months and he became someone he didn’t know he could be and it was all for her. He wants nothing but the best for his girl. He gives her the ‘special treatment’ or ‘reward’ whenever she asks for it. She’ll do something nice for him to receive his special kisses but Steve knew that he’ll give her anything without her working for it. He just likes the attention he gets from her when she gets a little needy.
 Steve feels his crotch stirring under his pants at the thought of eating his little girl out. He always eats her out and makes her putty with his fingers but his cock remains abandoned. 
 He didn’t think she was ready. He didn’t want to scare his girl. He’ll wait as long as he needs until his little girl’s ready for him. For the time being, he’ll make sure to keep his little girl happy and satisfied.
 Steve’s thoughts were cut off when his little girl walked in front of him with a weird look on her face, a phone held against her right ear. He sits up in attention, his body becoming alert at the way her face scrunches up in fear as she looks at him.
 “What’s wrong, little girl?” His voice is a whisper but his tone is hard. 
 She looks at him with a frown before handing him the phone. He looks at it and listens to her as she speaks.
 “Father called… Which is weird because he never calls when they’re on a trip. Let alone a business trip. He told me that the trip would be a few months and I didn’t think they would be in some kind of situation after being gone for almost seven months… They’re usually gone longer than that. But then that guy—” She points at the phone in Steve’s hand before continuing her explanation.
 “—That guy took the phone away from my father when he’s explaining something to me about telling something to you, Steve. His name is Rumlow and he’s got a very foul mouth—” He watches as her nose scrunches up, probably at the memory of the man’s words on the phone but Steve didn’t care about that. He’s worried about Rumlow talking to you. Through your father’s phone at that!
 Steve presses the phone against his ear before asking who’s on the other line.
 “Ahh, Rogers… Where’s the little brat? I thought she’s enjoying the things I’m promising her. Told her about how my cock will make her cunt cry—” Steve feels his blood boiling at the way Rumlow is talking about his little girl.
 “What are you on about, Rumlow? What are you doing with that phone?” Steve cuts Rumlow off, voice so harsh that he sees her flinching at his tone. He smiles at her before ushering her back to her room.
 “You see… Your girl is supposed to be mine. I saw her first but imagine the surprise I got when I ask her dear daddy for her hand and he tells me that she’s married to a Steve fucking Rogers.” Steve hears Rumlow’s bitter laugh before hearing her little girl’s father groan in pain, no doubt that he took a blow from Rumlow.
 “I just want a simple deal here, Rogers. I’ll text the address and I expect to have the girl and a bag filled with… I don’t know, ten million dollars? If you’re too broke then just bring the girl. I’m sure she’ll make the lack of ten million with her pretty little cunt.” Rumlows cackle was heard along with the cries of your parents. He must’ve held them as hostages. 
 “Do that and her parents stay safe. Be here at 9 pm sharp or it’s bye-bye for her lovely parents. Tik-Tok, Rogers. Tik-Tok…” Steve almost crushes the phone into pieces in his hand when Rumlow hangs up on him. Rumlow holds your parents as hostages and dares to speak about you like that. He’ll fucking kill him.
 The phone buzzes and he sees the address Rumlow sent him. They were no longer in Prague. They’re back here...
 Steve makes a move to call his best man, Bucky, when he hears sounds coming from her room. He quickly runs over, throwing her door open to see her shoving a bunch dollar bills into a huge bag while a phone is pressed against her neck and her shoulder. 
 Steve’s heart falls at the sight of tears falling down her face. She must’ve heard everything with the connecting phone lines. He sighs before walking over to his girl and steadying her by holding her shoulders in a firm grip. “Everything will be alright. I’ll call someone to fix the problem. They’ll clear the building, catch the bad guy, and then your parents will be home in no time!” Steve gives her a smile but it doesn’t work. Her face is still wet with tears as she shakes her head in disagreement.
 “No! The b-bad guy will harm my parents if he sees your men without me! I don’t w-want anything bad happening to my family, Steve. I-I don’t want that!” He pulls her against his chest as he sobs and shakes against his hold. Steve runs a comforting hand on her back before sighing in defeat. 
 “Fine. We’ll save your parents but I have to call my friends for backup. And you have to stay as far away from the fighting. I’ll have my best guy, James, be with you the whole time. You can trust him, he’s my best friend. You need to stick with him because he’ll keep you safe, got it?” He gives her a firm yet gentle look, jaw clenching when she nodded eagerly at him before continuing to fill the bag with cash. 
 He makes his calls and in no time, they’re driving towards the address Rumlow sent him.
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  Steve parks the car a few miles away from the building where her parents are being held as hostages. He looks at his little girl who’s currently wearing sweatpants and his hoodie which looks pretty big on her. He smiles at the sight before letting out a shaky breath. 
 “You gotta stay here, okay? I promise that I’ll get your parents out safely. You don’t have to worry about them because I’ll protect them for you, okay? You trust me, little girl?” He watches her as she reluctantly nods her head. He sighs at that before handing her a pistol gun. “You know how to use one?” He asks, surprised to see his little girl nod. She must’ve seen his surprised look because she looks down before explaining, “I had basic shooting lessons.”  He smiles at his little girl before nodding. 
 He gets out of the car before walking around and opening the door for his girl and helping her out. He sees James walking over to them and he nods at his friend in acknowledgment before looking back at his girl. “This is Bucky. He’ll keep you safe. Stick with him, alright?” He watches her girl as she observes his friend with her adorable curious eyes.  
 “The others are already surrounding the building. Backup is also ready. Just say something and they’ll attack. Good luck out there.” He smiles at Bucky’s words before kissing his girl’s forehead.
 “Please stay safe, Steve.” His girl mutters and he feels his heart skip a beat at that moment. “I will. Anything for you, little girl.” He turns to leave, hearing his girl one last time before disappearing. 
 “That’s a nice-looking vest, Mr. Bucky.”
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  Everything was going well for Steve. Rumlow’s men are really weak and easy to take down and when Rumlow realized that, he ran. He ran away like the coward he is. He ran out of the building and that was that. At least, that’s what Steve thought. 
 He was able to see her parents and he quickly untied them, her mother thanking him endlessly while her father only grumbled his thanks once. 
 He was guiding the couple out of the building, surprised to see his little girl standing a few miles away from them with Bucky. He sees her eyes brighten in relief that made all his worries disappear. 
 He was walking with her parents when he heard the cocking of a gun beside his head. 
 “Not so fast.” A raspy voice speaks beside him.
 Rumlow…
 Before Steve could even move, a bang was heard. Followed by another bang that has his ears ringing in pain. He closes his eyes to ease the aching in his head or his body. Was he shot? 
 His eyes fly open when he remembers that his girl is also out in the open and his eyes quickly darts over towards her.
 To his surprise, his girl is holding the gun he gave her earlier in his direction. 
 Steve quickly scans the couple near him for injuries when he hears someone groaning below him. He finds Rumlow laying on his back, legs bleeding while his arms are spread out. 
 He looks back at his girl, a sense of pride filling his system. His girl just did that. 
 He watches as his girl runs towards him with her arms wide open, ready to envelop him in a hug. 
 Steve grins before he hears Rumlow muttering and everything seems to be moving in slow motion. 
 “If I can’t have her… Then nobody can!” Rumlow spits before a loud bang go out.
 Steve’s eyes grow wide when he sees the bullet piercing through his hoodie and into his girl’s chest. 
 His heart stops when he sees her falling down into Bucky’s arms and onto the cold ground. 
 Her mother’s cries filled Steve’s ringing ears as well as her father’s curses as he tried to console his wife.
 Steve quickly kicks the gun from Rumlow’s hand before kicking the bastard’s face repeatedly until he’s unconscious. He releases all his anger on the bastard who shot his little girl by bending down and throwing punches down the unconscious man. He keeps punching until he sees Bucky carrying his girl towards them. 
 He pulls back from a bleeding Rumlow before running towards Bucky and taking his girl from his best friend. He brushes some stray hair away from her forehead before observing her face. 
 “Call the fucking ambulance!” He barks at nobody but Bucky follows his order, quickly fumbling with his phone and calling their mob doctor. 
 Steve was about to rip his hoodie off his girl when her eyes suddenly flew open, gasping for air. 
 Steve’s heart stops for a second, he doesn’t know if it’s from shock or relief but he’s grateful to see his little girl alive and breathing. He feels her wrap her arms around his neck, burying her face on the side of his neck as she catches her breath. He wraps his arm around her shaking body, gripping her tight and pulling her body against his like he’s afraid that she’ll slip away from his grasp.
 “Mother. Father. I’m so glad you’re okay!” He hears his girl talking to her parents who are currently behind him. He should let her go to reunite with her parents but he doesn’t. He keeps her against his body. 
 “Are you okay, dear?” Her mother asks and he feels his girl nodding against his neck. His girl finally pulls away from him before tugging on the hoodie she’s wearing and pulling it up to reveal a bulletproof vest. 
 Bucky’s laughter fills the air and everyone turns to look at him. “You little genius!” He exclaims before pointing at his little girl. “She kept bothering me about my vest and didn’t stop until I gave her one! Ah... You got yourself a keeper and a smartass, Steve!” He continues to laugh, her parents soon follow Bucky until everyone is laughing as well. 
 Everyone’s laughter is cut off by Rumlow waking up before gasping for air just like you were a few moments ago. 
 He pulls his girl against his chest, blocking her view from Bucky who gets his gun out before pointing it towards Rumlow’s head. 
 Steve covers his girl’s ears before another bang goes out. The last one for the night.
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  “I’m really fine, Steve. Dr. Banner said I was fine! No scars and all, see?” You pull your hoodie up to assure him. You watch him stare at your skin, probably looking for scars before he forces your hoodie down with a frown as he bites his lip. 
 “You can’t just pull your shirt up like that. People might see.” His hushed and commanding voice makes you gulp and nod apologetically. 
 You look around as he walks the both of you towards the lake. “But there’s nobody around, Steve.” You whisper, looking down at the dirt as you walk with him. 
 You feel his warm fingers under your chin before your head is tilted up so you’re looking directly up at him. “You really are a smartass, huh?” He smirks, feeling your body warm up against his hold before throwing his arm around your shoulders to continue walking.
 Steve holds you close as the both of you walk down the dock under the darkness of the night. He stops just at the end of the dock before turning to face you. 
 You admire his face, looking so enchanting under the light of the moonlight. “You remember the first time we met?” He asks, grinning at your embarrassed reaction which is you chewing your bottom lip. He caresses your face before running his thumb across your lips, stopping your teeth’s attacks on your lips.
 “How you’re taught to shoot a gun but not how to swim will always be a mystery.” He chuckles, smiling down at you and you watch him as he does just that. He’s just so pretty to look at.
 “You really scared me tonight, little girl…” His sad tone made your eyebrows shoot up in worry. “I-I didn’t mean to, Steve! I’m so sorry.” You frown at yourself but he brushes his fingers on the wrinkles you made between your eyebrows which makes you relax just a bit.
 “I was supposed to be the one protecting you. Not the other way around.” He lets out a sigh before looking at the water. “But thank you. Thank you for doing that. And for trusting me. I know you were a little hesitant with trusting me but you still did. So thank you for that. It means a lot.” Steve looks back at you and smiles. You feel your heart fluttering at his smile but it also breaks at his words. You wanted to tell him that he’s wrong but you are cut off by a bunch of lights.
 You gasp at the lights that start to flicker all around you. You do a slow full 360, looking at the trees that are covered with fairy lights, the side of the docks are covered with lights as well, and the darkness is soon replaced by a whole bunch of lights. Your heart starts to jump when you hear slow music playing in the background and it feels like every time you do a full 360 turn, something new presents itself. 
 Everything seems so magical, so pretty and so… Something straight out of the fairytale movies that you watch. 
 You turn to face Steve again only to find him gone. You frown before looking down to see him down on one knee, a red velvet box in his hand which he holds towards you.
 You feel yourself grinning with so much joy running through your system and you can’t help but to let out a squeal when the velvet box opens to reveal a very pretty diamond ring. 
 “Little girl… Will you make me the happiest man alive by marrying me?” He asks, uncharacteristically shy which makes you giggle. You start giggling more which makes Steve lick his lips as his eyes flash his nervousness. 
 “Steve, you’re so dumb.” You mumble through giggles. 
 “Huh?” Steve slowly stands up, looking at you with sad eyes.
 “We’re already married! We both signed the papers!” You point out the obvious, stopping your giggle fit before kissing him on the lips.
 “Don’t be sad, Steve… I accept your proposal… Even though we’re already married.” You giggle once more before letting him put the ring on you.
 He guides you until the both of you are sitting on the edge of the dock, feet dangling down the water.
 “I just wanted you to have a normal yet magical experience even just for a moment,” Steve whispers after a few minutes of silence.
 “That’s kind of useless.” You automatically say.
 “What? Why?” Steve feels his heart fall at your words. Is he doing this whole thing wrong?
 “I already feel like that whenever I’m with you.” You state, looking at him like it’s the most obvious thing in the world.
 Steve feels his heart beat an extra mile but he also feels relieved that he’s indeed doing it right. 
 You grin at the sight of Steve blushing in front of you. You never thought that the man who was so hard on you the first time you met was going to be a blushing mess in front of you right now.
 “Hey, Steve?” Your voice cuts the thin air and he looks at you with a raised eyebrow. “Yeah?”
 “You know how I saved your life earlier…” Steve smiles at your bashful expression that he finds so adorable.
 “Mhmm…” He nonchalantly hums.
 “Well… I was thinking…” You bite your lip in nervousness and embarrassment at the question you’re about to ask him.
 “What is it, little girl?” His voice is matched with a chuckle as he gives you a grin.
 “Can I have a reward for that?” You blurt out.
 Steve feels his cock stir in his pants at her words. He bites his lip before standing up and helping her up as well.
 “I’ll give you everything you want, little girl. It doesn’t have to be a reward. You ask for it, you get it, is that clear?” He gives you a questioning look before smiling when you nod eagerly at him.
 “Now, what is it that you want as a reward?” 
 ————-
He trails kisses from your forehead to your nose, nose to your cheeks, cheeks to your neck. He purposely skips your lips with a grin and starts feasting on your neck. He licks and sucks on a spot he knows too well, earning an adorable squeak from you when he teasingly bites on the skin. “S-Steve!” You gasp, hands going straight to his head, fingers sliding through his soft hair. He continues nipping on your neck until your head tilts back and a quiet moan escapes your lips.
 He pulls away to look at you and then smirks.
 “You want me to give you those special kisses for your rewards?” He cocks a brow before smiling when you nod your head eagerly at him. “Y-yes please.” 
 Steve wastes no time to pleasure you. His little girl.
 He dives for your glistening core and groans in pleasure at your taste. He uses his tongue to stimulate you through your clit, enjoying the way your body shakes under his hold.
 Steve listens to your moans and whimpers like a song and uses it as motivation to keep you a writhing mess under him. “Please, S-Stevie…” He hears you cry under him, reaching your hands towards his hands and pulling it closer to his face as he tongues your clit. 
 Steve chuckles at your needy behavior but complies, not missing the nickname leaving your lips. Anything for his little girl.
 Steve easily enters a finger into your wet core, groaning at your warmness and wetness before adding another finger. He sees your face contorting into a mix of pleasure and pain. Steve leans down to kiss your clit and flicks his tongue faster to distract you from the pain.
 “A-aah” He watches your eyes rolling back when he begins to spread his fingers inside you. Another finger enters and you’re crumbling against his fingers, walls closing around his fingers as you cum undone under him. He pulls away from you before reaching for your face and kissing you hungrily. He smiles against the kiss when he feels you return the kiss with the same hunger.
 He feels you pulling away and he lets you, frowning a little when he sees you looking at him timidly. His hand carefully reaches for your face, knuckles gliding down for cheeks smoothly. “What is it, little girl?” 
 He watches you bite your lip before looking at him with half-lidded eyes. “I w-want to give you special kisses too…” Steve freezes as he feels his cock getting harder than before. He feels your hands reaching for his member, giving him a look before gulping. “C-can you teach me? I want to make you feel good too…” 
 Steve doesn’t know which is beating harder; his cock or his heart, maybe both… Probably both. You do that to him. Only you. His little girl. 
 Steve finds himself gulping as well. “You don’t have to, litt—” 
 “I want to!” You’re quick to cut him off. Almost eager, he notices. He lets out a nervous laugh before nodding. “Okay, okay… I’ll teach you.” He doesn’t miss the way your eyes light up from his approval. He smiles at you before guiding your hands that’s currently holding his hard member.
 “Just do this gently…” He guides your hands up and down his shaft, head going crazy at the sight of your hands not being able to cover his huge cock. He bites his lip, willing himself to hold on and not cum on your hands so early.
 “C-can I kiss it now?” He looks down at you, sitting on the mattress as your innocent eyes look up at him while he stands on the ground. “Go ahead, little girl. Try it.” He encourages you, smiling when you press a quick kiss on his tip. His jaw clenches when you press another kiss, longer this time. 
 Steve’s eyes flutter when he feels your tongue dancing around his tip. You begin to lick along the shaft and then under, making Steve groan wantonly. 
 Steve lets out a frustrated huff when you quickly pull away from him. “I-I’m sorry. I was just doing what you did to me. I-I didn’t mean to hurt you!” Your eyes are teary and Steve realized that his moans made you think that you hurt him.
 He sighs before leaning down to your face, giving you an assuring smile before kissing your nose. “You didn’t do anything wrong, little girl. You’re doing everything right. In fact, you’re doing so great that my friend down there couldn’t help but to go wild under your touch.” He points at his member before grinning at your widened eyes.
 “I’m going to guide you. There’s no reason to be afraid. If you want to stop, just tap me and we will stop. We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, okay?” He waits for your response and lets out a breath of relief when you nod.
 He stands back up, putting your hands on his behind and guiding your face just in front of his cock. “Open wide, little girl.” He sings and grins when you do as told. He holds the back of your head but never pushes you, leaving you to go at your own pace.
 You push yourself forward, taking him halfway before pulling back and pushing yourself back to him. His moans of pleasure push you to do more so you do. You swirl your tongue on his tip as you bob your head, smiling at the loud moan that leaves his lips. 
 “You little tease…” He breathes out, his grip on your head getting tighter but not enough to hurt you. He feels the vibration of your laughter on his cock and he lets out another cry of pleasure.
 Feeling confident with yourself, you push yourself forward until his tip hits the back of your throat, making you gag.
 He helps you as you pull away from him, looking down at you with his flushed face. He studies your face, eyes shadowed with lust, making his heart do somersaults. He wipes the tears on your face before saying, “Breathe through your nose, okay?” He watches you nod and chuckles when you go back for his cock, taking him deep at a slow pace and staying there for a second before pulling slightly away. “That’s my good girl…” He moans as you continue to take him, teasing his tip with your tongue when he suddenly pulls you away from him.
 “Did I—” He cuts you off with a kiss, groaning against your lips and pushing you until you’re lying on your back with him on top of you. “You did great. I just want my cum somewhere else…” He catches your lips when you bite on them, his tongue pushing its way into your mouth.
 He pulls away, guiding your body until he’s kneeling between your thighs, one hand on his cock while the other is on your thigh. “Is this okay?” He asks when he places the tip of his cock on your slit.
 You gingerly nod, whimpering when he slides his cock on your sensitive clit. “P-please…” You have no idea what you’re begging for but he seems to know what he’s doing. 
 “Do you trust me, little girl?” Steve asks, looking at your face with hopeful eyes.
 “Yes, Stevie. I trust you.” Steve’s heart warms up at how fast you answered his question. He nods before sliding a few more teasing thrusts into your folds and clit before slowly sliding his tip into your slit. He stops to look at your face that’s contorted into a frown. He leans down your face to kiss your frown away and kisses your lips as well, hoping to distract you from the pain. 
 Steve pushes his cock deeper when he feels you relax under him. He pushes slowly and stops when he’s fully in, groaning when your walls hug his member tightly. “Fuck!” He hisses before looking at you. “You okay?” He asks, smiling when you nod at him, eyes closed. He kisses your lips before pulling halfway and thrusting into you once more, earning a little whimper from you.
 “How are you feeling, baby?” You try to ignore the nickname, opening your eyes and looking straight at his eyes. “G-good. Please move, Stevie.” You press your palms against his chest. He pulls halfway out before shoving himself inside you again, repeating this action until you’re moaning loudly under him and clutching his biceps for support.
 Steve feels your walls fluttering around him, alarming him that you’re close. He knows he’s close as well so he helps you reach your peak by rubbing your clit with his fingers, groaning at how your walls tighten around him.
 Steve listens to your cries of pleasure as your walls clamp down on his cock as you cum, making him cum as well and milking him. Your body shakes under him and both of you breathe heavily as you try to catch your breath. He falls to your side, his arms enveloping around you to pull you against his chest into a warm and strong embrace.  
 “It’s official. We just consummated our marriage... I’m all yours just as much as you’re all mine.” He stares at your face, watching your eyes as you fight yourself from falling asleep.
 “I fucking love you, little girl.” He lazily says, brushing your face with his fingers. You stare at him sleepily, listening to the beat of his heart.
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  “The fuck is he doing?” Your father grumbles as he watches Steve prance around the kitchen.
 “He’s making our daughter breakfast. I think our daughter broke him.” Your mother snickers at the way your father looks at Steve in disbelief. 
 “You tellin’ me that he touched Y/N?!” Your father fumes, getting ready to walk up to the man in the kitchen before your mother stops him.
 “Oh, hunny. Would you stop that? They’re married. And Y/N is an adult. They both are. They can do anything they want. And I can see that Steve really loves our daughter. The way he acted after Y/N got shot. Not to mention the part where he literally saved our asses. Your ass.” Your mother berates your father who just huffs in response before leaving. Your mother chuckles before following her husband, ready to give him a piece of her mind.
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  “You made cookies without me?” Steve’s heart flutters as you pout at him. “I want to make cookies too…” You mumble under your breath. You just woke up from your sleep when Steve entered the room with a plate full of cookies.
 “I didn’t want you getting into any accidents, little girl.” Steve chuckles when you take one cookie before grumpily munching on it. He watches as your eyes light up before covering it up with a frown. “Will you stop calling me little girl?”
 “Never.” He simply says. You huff and Steve couldn’t help but to chuckle at your cuteness.
 “Your cookies aren't even that good. I make better cookies.” You mumble before taking another cookie from the plate and munching on it. Steve raises an eyebrow at you before shaking his head. “I know you do, little girl. I know you do.” He smiles at you before making a move to sit beside you. 
 “No! Wait! Stay there.” You point a finger at him before fumbling around the sheets as if looking for something. 
 “You okay?” Steve asks, eyes shooting open when you jump out of the bed to stand in front of him, only the sheets covering your body. You realize this and quickly pull on the hoodie from last night before looking back at Steve with a grin.
 “Hi,” You start, earning a confused look from Steve. “Hello?” He chuckles when you look at him with so much excitement that you’re literally bouncing on your toes.
 “I want to give you something.” 
 “What is it?” Steve watches your fist as you hold it against his face before opening it, revealing a gold ring that looks to be vintage or a hundred years old.
 “Where’d that come from, little girl?” Steve whispers.
 “Can I put it on you? Will you marry me too?” You ignore his question, too excited to listen to anything. Steve laughs before nodding, watching you with adoration as you giddily put the ring on him. 
 “There! So pretty! You’re so pretty, Stevie!” You continue to admire the ring on his finger when he takes your chin with said hand, making you look up at him. 
 “Thank you, little girl.” He leans down to press a kiss on your lips before pulling away with a smile.
 “My father gave it to me.” You blurt out, making Steve’s eye widen just a bit. 
 “Your father?” He asks, not sure about what’s happening.
 “Yes. He came here earlier. Told me that you deserve the ring and that you should never make him regret anything?” Steve listens to you, you obviously don’t know what your father did but it’s enough for Steve to understand.
 “Oh… And Stevie?” He looks at you, smiling and asking you if you need something.
 “I love you too.” You grin at him.
 Steve stares at you for a moment before feeling tears sliding down his cheeks.
 He makes a quick move towards you, pulling you in a tight embrace and pampering your face with kisses.
 “I love you, little girl. Thank you for saying it back.” He mumbles against your hair before pressing a kiss on your lips once more.
 “Stop calling me little girl!” You grumble against him.
 He only chuckles at you before shaking his head. “No. You’ll always be my little girl.”
 ----
a/n: omfg if you finished all that, congratulations you just wasted a whole lot of ur time but thanks for wasting it on me 3;-)
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missallsundayyy · 3 years
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Could you write a story where Law takes Robin's first time and she's first all hesitant and shy about it? But he really can't control himself. Just read all your stories in your masterlist and my gosh it's beautiful
I TRIED MY VERY BEST TO WRITE THIS AND THANK YOU FOR READING MY STORIES I APPRECIATE IT ALOT 🥺❤️ PORN WITHOUT PLOT BCOS IM GOING STRAIGHT FOR IT. Thank you for requesting this fic i’ll try to cater to every request because I KNOWWW THE FEELING LIKE I GOT YOU! I even have a perfect picture to match the plot of the story xx
RESEARCH
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“You’re a damn tease woman..” he scowled while attacking her neck giving wet open kisses all the way down to her collarbone. “I can’t hold myself back if you’re going to wear provocative outfits” he said, palming her left breast roughly.
“Mhmm la-law...please..” she whispered. He chuckled ceasing his actions, “You know how hard It was to convince your crew to let me borrow their beloved archeologist….to help me decipher my research…” he stopped to look at the now bare and naked beauty below him, her face away from him Her nipples were perky and erected and not to mention the size of her breast...it was enormous almost covered her whole entire face which was now looking at anything but him. She was shy and he most definitely didn’t expect this from the confident and collected Nico Robin. It was a whole nother persona right in front of him and he was enjoying every second of it. The woman below him could easily use her devil fruit powers and snap every bone he has and stop him but no...every touch he placed on her body made her caved into him. Her body sensitivity was heightened for him, his touch, his kisses and his presence. “ fuckk look at you, you’re so beautiful underneath me, bare like this and on my sheets.” he grunt, his boner was evident and growing harder and larger by the second.
“Baka! Don’t say embarrassing things like that” she squeaked out turning to face the pirate captain. He laughed “Your crew gave me only 2 days with you and at this rate i think i’ll use it to fuck you senseless here in my room since you prefer to be in here more. Maybe I'll take you in my operating room tool so that I could always remember you when we’re apart.” he said confidently.
Needless to say the historian’s face was beet in colour, she was embarrassed by his bold words and never did she expected Trafalgar Law to have such a foul mouth.
“La--law-kun, i--” Robin stuttered, finding it hard to put her words together. He has her right where he wants her and she is starting to get hesitant like could she even handle him. Maybe it was a bad idea to tease him too much. He had always known her ways of flirting with him but she guessed when she broke into his room in a white spaghetti strapped top that literally does nothing to hide her enormous breast with a pair of jean shorts to sneak around his room and see his personal collection of books he owned was apparently the last straw for him.
“Look at you, the pirate goddess with 130million berries, a strong willed woman with an extraordinary beam of confidence and elegance...looking so reticent and self conscious right below me.” Law said with a smirk lifting one finger to bring her chin up, facing her to him. “Don’t be shy with me Nico-ya, you’re the only woman that has successfully made me so riveted. Your beauty has captivated me since the day I first saw you and can you imagine how keen I was to know you when I found out how smart, wise and pacific you are.”
Robin was touched by his confession and before she could reply he continued “I like you Nico-ya. I like you so much and I’ll make you feel so good and I will only put you and your pleasure first.” His fingers were already ghosting her entrance that was already slick and wet, she was so horny for him and was solely turned on with just his voice and also mostly with how Law presents himself. He was in short, Robin’s type.
“So wet…..all for me” he slipped one digit in and she threw her head back with a whine.
“M...more please, go faster!” she moaned softly bringing her palms to cover her mouth. He smiled and added three of his fingers in all the way and lunged all digits in a quick and hot pace, he was fingering her and she wasn’t mentally prepared for such swift and agile pace because when she asked him to be fast she didn’t THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FAST. She missed the part where she was a complete total virgin but of course she wasn't entirely innocent either. She was still a woman with sexual needs but sexual intercourse was never relevant to her since she was dead focused with her life goal. She never did thought that pleasure would feel this fucking good or maybe because its him that's bestowing it. Law had awakened her needs and reminded her that aside everything else she needed this and she deserved intimacy and she deserved to be touched and pleasured.
Her vision was clouded with a layer of tears, her mind was hazy and she was on cloud 9 and he was only doing the bare minimum. He brought his hands and gripped her neck, bringing her back to reality.
“Feel good my love? Look at me c'mon..” when she locked eyes with the doctor she felt her insides throb more and not just from the invasion of his fingers. She could feel her juices gushing out and dripping on his hands from the way his knuckles or hand would ever so bump the side of her thighs. “Hhh-hai! Feels so...mhmmmm full” her eyes couldn’t take the intense pleasure anymore she had to break their gaze and her eyes fluttered and closed momentarily and he took the opportunity and dived face first into her wet hole and gave her a viscous long hard lick.
Robin’s eyes flew wide open with her both hands instinctively grabbing his shoulders and hair pulling it roughly.
“Ohhh!” she moaned out and he was eating her out vigorously, she was a lost cause the moment his mouth made contact with her pussy. He made her a moaning hot mess, her fingers raked his scalp, pulling and tugging his hair softly while pressing his face deeper into her cunt, ushering him to go intensely because she feels her high coming...and then…. He heard him groaned out and she moaned loudly. A burst of energy surged throughout her body, it was exhilarating, almost current like, she felt her orgasm ripping through. Was it cum? No...she didn’t think it was so what the hell was that feeling.
“Fuuuckk.” she heard him swore and she felt him stopping his assault on her. Her eyes fluttered open and her vision returned to her slowly and it slowly processed his face that was covered in strings of milky white liquid, he was taken aback by the sudden orgasm and didn’t expect her to even squirt from his tongue and fingers. Shit. Her body sprung up and her panic mode was on, she was beyond embarrassed and mortified she didn’t even know she was capable of squirting and she was now telling him how sorry she was, basically having a word vomit which was very out of character for Robin to be anything but calm and collected. But out of all the apologies and her trying to explain herself, he only caught and focused on one thing she had accidentally let slip out.
“First time..?? You m-mean? You’ve never done this Nico-ya?” Law’s lust was now uncontrollable, knowing that he was going to be Robin’s first and he would have the honour and pleasure of deflowering the beauty and the best part, this was all in his bedroom and he would always have the memory of his first time with her even when they were apart.
Robin shied away from his question and shunned her face away...this only confirmed Law’s question. Such a fierce woman and now was timid and innocent looking, all just for him. His feral and dominant side took over him and he grabbed Robin’s hands and pinned her completely down. Hands on both sides interlocked with each other in a death grip, he was literally panting from lust and he was turned on beyond words not to mention his cock was PAINFULLY hard and if he didn’t bury himself in her he would burst anytime soon.
“You’re so fucking cute.” he groaned at her facial expression. “I’ll make you feel good my love” he ended all talking there and plunged himself all the way in and because of how fucking wet her pussy was from the foreplay before it didn’t hurt her at all, strange because it was anything BUT pain. Robin had read in books how painful it was for women but all she felt was extreme and overwhelming amounts of pleasure. “Oh my god!” she screamed when he sheathed himself roughly into her and went in a god like pace.
“Fuck fuck fuck fuck so tight!” he groaned and dipped his head down and took her mouth in his and they kissed, it was sloppy and borderline nasty and the sounds emitting from their kiss alone screamed HORNY. Robin was enjoying every second of this, she had never had sex and her first time was with the man that she was slowly falling for and someone she found so hot and attractive. All hesitance and shyness was thrown out the damn window when he took her roughly like this and she was a moaning mess, and her moans was music to his ears, it was so inviting and sultry he could literally fuck her the whole night. His cock reached all the right places and it was perfect for her pretty cunt, going in and out at a monstrous pace yet managing to stimulate her walls so well and hitting all the right nerves. He could hear the gushing and sloshing sound from their connection and how his precum was mixing with her own juices was now sopping out from her hole, fuck what an erotic sight.
“Ah...ahhhh law..please, oh my g--law ha... it feels so hot---” her hands fought his gripped and flew free and she gripped his shoulder for support and her hips rocked harder and towards his thrusts. Her mouth opened wide, head thrown back in bliss and Law buried his face on the crook of her neck and he fucked her hard for god knows how long because they were both so clouded with lust and both chasing their own high. “I’m goin--fuck...im going to fill you up like this if you keep clenching around my cock like that Nico-ya!”
“In me pp-pplease spill it in me, don’t pull out...ha ha ah ah! I-i’m go..going to cuum!” her legs shook and she vibrated in frenzy when her second high overcame her soul once again. She came with a loud cry and ropes and ropes of milky white cum gushed out from her sloppy hole making spurt sounds in addition to Law’s cock abusing her hole all the sound waves was heightened to him, his view of her large breast bouncing from their rocking, her hands holding and hugging onto him for dear life, her face contort to absolute pleasure, mouth wide open, moaning hotly and panting for air. She was so lewd right now and he knew there was no other woman that could take him like this and there was no woman he would rather pleasure than Nico Robin.
“F..fuck take it take it take it!” he grunted in her chest and came hard, shooting his load into her, painting her walls white and staining her innocence right there and then. “Ahh! I--its too full Law!!” she screamed loudly and both of them were sure that his crew could hear everything they were doing right now but he couldn’t care less. They both continued and rode through their highs and orgasm until they were satiated.
That night, they spent the whole night making love but mostly hard raw fucking, he explored every part of her and touched her in so many aspects and way possible. She lost count of how many times she cummed and how many cosmic orgasms she felt. He pleasured her like no other and he had branded sex with him into her very soul.
The bedsheet was now a MESS, it was stained with cum, sweat and saliva and it was fucking sinful to even get his ship’s cleaner to clean this mess for him. Law had fully exhausted himself and the goddess underneath him was close to passing out from all the fucking they did but he wouldnt let her drift asleep without cleaning her up properly.
“I’ve run a warm bath for us Nico-ya, let me clean you up properly and then i’ll rub you to sleep okay?” Law said lovingly while scooping her up bridal style, he was gentle with her knowing she was going to be sore everywhere, she was extremely brilliant for him and put up with his pleasurable abuse so of course she was receiving royalty like aftercare.
~BONUS~
“Neh Robin! Are you okay? You seem to be limping ever since you came back from your stay” Chopper asked worriedly.
“Fufufu don’t worry, it was just a little accident on the Polar Tang but Law-kun had already taken care of it” Robin assured her nakama. Chopper smiled “Well! If Law said it's fine then you should be okay soon Robin!” With that the little reindeer walked away finding Usopp who was fishing for their dinner.
Nami who was listening to their conversation wasn't buying her story one bit “So you and the captain of the Heart Pirates are boning each other huh Robin?” The orange- haired navigator hugged her best friend from behind, “We let you go for two days and you finally decide to make your move on him” Nami teased.
Robin giggled “I think he suits me well don’t you think so Nami?”
“Well you know what this means...girls night!!” Nami exclaimed, dragging Robin for an afternoon sun tan.
211 notes · View notes
hehebread · 3 years
Text
[BKDK] Izuku keeps mentioning a Kacchan to reporters and they think that's his gf
this was a request on twt that i had way too much fun writing. warning for suggestive language!
--
“And is there…. a special person….or a group of people you would like to thank on air today? Anyone who inspired you? Anyone you would attribute your success to? An image of victory per say?”
Izuku’s eyes glimmer as the bright lights of the studio reflect on his irises. “Oh!” He jumps in his seat, his perfectly- coiffed curls bouncing as he nods frantically to the show’s host. “Yes! Yes!” Leaning forward with his hands on his leg, the camera zooms in on his face where the blush is painting his cheeks. “I wouldn’t be the hero I am today if it wasn’t for Kacchan!”
And it’s as if an earthquake alert dropped on the talk show. The host grows this devious grin on his face as he turns to the camera team and says, “Well, well, well, behind every great man is a woman after all.”
Izuku isn’t quite sure why the host is bringing his mother into this since the interview is reaching its end and he has already discussed her influence in detail very early on, but he doesn’t get a chance to ponder.
The host, Yamaguchi-san, leans into Izuku’s space with renowned interest and an interesting glint in his eyes. Izuku feels himself sweating in his oversized maroon-striped suit.
“So, Midoriya-san, Hero Deku, Rising Symbol of Equity and Hope, can you tell us more about … Kacchan?” His voice goes higher at the last syllable, almost sing songs, and Izuku is not sure if he should be worried or not, but he won’t pass an opportunity to gush about Kacchan!
“Ah, Kacchan is very … confident, hardworking, strong, and smart. Kacchan is a hero who knows how to lead a team and perform under pressure, an inspiration to both myself and our entire graduating class, and a”—Izuku can feel the heat rise in his face as he tries to hide in his colour— “a shining star who was closer to me than All Might!”
The host makes a loud ‘AWWW’ noise at the same time as the small audience in the studio. “My, my! Sounds like Kacchan is very important to Hero Deku! Don’t be shy! Tell us more! Is there a physical description to go with your precious person?”
“Ahm!” Izuku fiddles with his fingers as he avoids the gazes on him. There a long beat of silence before he manages to say, “Muscles….Blonde…..Sharp eyes….” With a vague gesture to his middle section, he mumbles, barely audible, “Big, ugh…..” Heart.
“OOOOOOOOOH!” The host goes wild and so does the audience. “So are we talking Hiromi Oshima type big or maybe Rio Natsume, or aaaah Aki Hoshino even ….?”
Izuku feels his ears ring in humiliation as he tries to process what they’re talking about. Something Kacchan has in common with all these beautiful women is his big successful career so Izuku nods. “Yes!” Then, a thought occurs and he rises in his chair. “Even bigger!”
After all, Kacchan’s net worth is higher than these ladies.
“BIGGER?”
“The biggest!”
“Oh my god!” The host is losing his mind now! “And is it … natural? Or did Kacchan get a little help from professionals?”
“No, no, no! Kacchan was a natural ever since we were in school together!” Izuku’s eyes shine with a fire to defend his childhood best friend, no longer trying to hide in his big suit. “No one helped Kacchan get this big!”
“That’s … amazing!” The host shakes his head in both awe and disbelief. “Now we want to see Kacchan in action! When the hero works around the city, defeating villains, does the size get in the way?”
Does Kacchan’s fame get in the way of his work? “Sometimes,” Izuku muses, “But Kacchan never lets the restless and perky nuisances stop him, y’know. With a little shake from his hands, and a few colourful words of wisdoms, nothing gets in the way!” Izuku laughs as he remembers Kacchan’s way of dismissing fans and reporters alike.
“Wow!”
“Of course, there are times where Kacchan’s big firm moulds become springy and hard to control, but I have yet to see an instance where that has been a major issue. ”
Kacchan is still having some adjustment problems with his new hero costume, particularly his grenade mould, but that’s as far as distractions go.
“Does Kacchan not use support?”
“Uhm, only when it’s a dire situation! Sometimes I’m even allowed to provide assistance!”
“You must be very lucky…”
“I am! It feels … exciting and … very special! Kacchan doesn’t trust just anyone, y’know! I can never quite get used to the trust we built together. We are one unit working together.”
“Do you use your hands…. Or something else?”
“Oh, hands! Yes! But anything works really! Whatever Kacchan is comfortable with and needs at the time. Black Whip, combo moves, an iron grip...”
The host furrow his brows and seems to be considering Izuku’s answer before he opens his mouth again. “Uhm, never mind.” He then turns to the camera, smile back on. “Our time is almost running out! Thank you, hero Deku for your time! We look forward to seeing you again in the big screen!”
--
The next day, Izuku wakes up to the headline: Hero Deku And His Mysterious Busty New Girlfriend: The Beautiful and Spunky Kacchan!
He’s doomed
--
He sees Kacchan early the next day.
Having spent the morning talking to tabloids and the host show agents about the misunderstanding and whether or not it was possible to take down the episode at least, Izuku slumps his head on his desk in defeat.
Oh, this is very bad.
He starts thumping his forehead on the wood in sync with the bleeps noises in the phone, already planning his funeral in his head.
Okay, so it seems the suspense around this girlfriend is raking up his popularity, but god, at what cost.
“Nerd, we need to talk.”
Izuku’s soul near flies to the roof at the sound of the door to his office slamming close. Fuckfuckfuck.
Kacchan stands before him with his hand on his hip, teeth snarled and looking ready to tear his flesh open. Oh, this is going to be fun!
After flashing a haughty glare at the glass door to scare away the nosy friends hanging about, Kacchan continues, “About the interview.”
Of course! Yes! His final hour is approaching. “Haahahaha, what about it?” Izuku feels his undershirt cling to his torso, sweat collecting on his face. He directs a shaky hand to a nearby chair. “Feel free to take a seat, Kacchan! You want me to get you anything? Water, tissues, uhm, a knife, a body sized bag, or uhhh, a shovel? I think I have some spare sheets of paper if you’d like to give me a chance to—“
“So…” Kacchan starts.
“PLEASE TELL MY MUM I LOVE HER!”
“…this Kacchan, huh?” Having completely ignored every single word Izuku just said, Kacchan crosses his arms and scowls. “Is she strong? How come I never heard about her before? Since when did you start dating this gravure idol and pro hero, huh?”
“Wha—?”
“So, you just go around giving everyone pretty nicknames now?” Kacchan snorts and his expression darkens before he slams his hands on Izuku’s desk. He looks at Izuku from under his chin, and Izuku swear he can see flames behind his eyes. He growls, “What’s her actual name?”
An alarm bell rings in Izuku’s ears and he stutters, “Ka— Ka— Kat— Katsuko! Bakugan Katsuko…….”
Kacchan’s expression doesn’t change and Izuku feels his heart leap to his throat. God, Kacchan is gonna call his bluff at any minute now. He’s going to reject him then he’s going to break his heart and his bones.
“What’s she like?”
Kacchan shifts forward slightly and Izuku is just know noticing the ample cleavage in clear view. Right there. In front of Izuku’s face. “Uhm. Ah, she’s very, ugh, im- pec— impeccable!! And strong! Muscl— mature!! Breasty too – I mean, pretty! PRETTY!” Izuku bites his tongue then swallows thickly. “Beautiful, actually!” Lifting his gaze to meet Kacchan, he whispers, “Gorgeous. Just the most amazing person in my life.”
Kacchan is staring intently with his sharp red eyes, and Izuku feels his chest swell with confidence he never had before. “Kacchan is my inspiration, and I just … love … Kacchan so much. I wish I had the courage to tell him— um, her that.”
“Are you two serious?” Kacchan asks, impassive but there is silent rage hiding behind his words.
Something flashes quickly through Kacchan’s eyes before he narrows them. It takes Izuku a second to recognise that it’s /hurt/ and then he realise what he has just done.
“No, no, no!” Izuku backtracks immediately. “I don’t even know her that well! In fact, she kinda smells and definitely has sweating problem.” Izuku needs to do damage control and come clean NOW. “You know what? I will call her and break up with her right now. Ha ha ha.”
What the hell is he saying? Who is he going to call?
Kacchan stands up while Izuku fumbles with his phone. “Don’t be a dick,” he says, before he heads to the door.
Izuku jumps from his chair and is ready to chase after him when Kacchan stops him. “How big?”
“Huh?”
“You said Bakugan was big.”
Ah, yes, he did. Tragically.
“Um, y’know just…” Izuku motions with his hands like he’s moulding two doughballs, palms up and fingers wiggling because he’s lost control of his life once he accepted his funeral date, but that’s not even happening anymore so what is he doing really.
He then makes am hourglass shape in the air and belatedly realises that he’s just outlining Kacchan’s shape in front of him. Izuku retreats his hands and puts them behind his back in shame.
Kacchan is looking at him funny. Like he’s trying to figure something out.
“Does she shoot aerial bomb or something? Is that a combat-style quirk?”
Izuku blinks.
Kacchan just sneers and turns around.
“Whatever. I’m doing a photoshoot this afternoon. The Sekushī clothing line is dropping a new summer set and they asked me to model.”
“Se- Sekushi?? You mean, like—” Izuku feels his face go impossibly red. “You’re saying that, you’re going to wear, like…..” his voice goes down to a whisper when he says “…..a b-b-b-b-b-bikini?”
“Swimwear,” Kacchan turns to say over his shoulder, “Among other things.”
The sexy smirk he sends Izuku’s way is doing very, very weird things to Izuku’s body and imagination, things too inappropriate to describe in a work setting.
Kacchan leaves but not without offering the most dangerous challenge to Izuku’s mental wellbeing. “Feel free to drop in.”
Oh, he absolutely will.
“Bring Bakugon.”
Oh, he absolutely will not.
Actually….
Maybe, he will.
Kacchan is going to ruin Izuku
99 notes · View notes
danniburgh · 3 years
Text
Rushingly Bittersweet (Javier Peña x f!reader) part 21
Pairing: Javier Peña x ofc//f!reader with name.
Summary: After the fall of Escobar everything starts happening way too fast for Javier; his raise, his new office, his new team, the Cali cartel’s operation, the sudden arrival of a new agent that was transferred to his team for no apparent reason, the way he was falling in love with her almost unintentionally.
And he couldn’t seem to stop any of that.
Word count: +4.9k
Chapter warnings: uhm, this chapter is Javier’s perspective ehehe, so, beware fo feelings
A/N: This chapter is set in season three, episode ten. // again, i am really fucking sorry, but we are ALMOST DONE OMG, also i wanna say thanks to my official cheerleaders @queenofthefaceless and @maharani-radha-writes​ that helped me a lot and @alliterative-albatross​ that made me feel sure of some of the ideas i had for this chapter, i love you lots, guys. While proof reading this chapter for the first time i understood why it was the hardest to write, it was because i had just to strip myself naked and understand more of Javier Peña as i had built him... i just... im not quite pleased with the second half of this, but i know its needed.
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gif: @javier-pena (thank you so much for making this when i needed it the most, ily)
The air weighed on his chest; he felt his lungs struggling to find air; as he drove home, he felt his heart pounding hard and fast, as if it wanted to rip out of his chest and run and hide and die.
As if his heart wanted the same he did.
Javier couldn’t sleep that night. He didn’t even try to close his eyes after climbing into bed.
Every time he closed his eyes, he saw you.
Jesus Christ.
His mind was reeling, he couldn’t stop replaying every single thing you told him in his mind.
“My name is not Florencia Martín”
“A precarious situation”
“Another Los Pepes scenario”
“You do care, you care a lot”
He wanted to crawl into a deep hole and bury himself to stop his body from feeling.
Javier cringed deeply when he remembered he had told you he had fallen in love with you without even thinking about it.
That certainly wasn’t the way you were supposed to find out.
He guessed, while tossing around on his bed, on the same sheets that still smelled like you, that he had it coming. He probably deserved it. But that didn’t make him feel any better, it stung.
It burned.
Javier had stripped himself naked for you, more than just his body, he had let you see him; he had let you touch him; he had let you read him; he had let you know him.
He had let himself feel and… he had let himself think he deserved something good.
He felt like such an idiot, stupid and embarrassed because there you had been… Standing in front of him, in a place he thought it would become something close to his fortress, breaking him. And he let you.
God. He had known you for less than six months, and yet he let you have power over him. All that power to make him whatever you wanted. He had handed you a sledgehammer and his heart and soul on a porcelain platter for you to shatter.
And he just took it.
Javier huffed at his own thoughts while his eyes were glued to the ceiling.
He was an idiot, wasn’t he? Having let himself feel all those things he had been so beware of for a woman he never really knew.
What else was fake about you?
He felt that sting, known and oh so foreign clench in his throat and he fought it. He fought it hard. Why was he feeling like that?
“A precarious situation”
“You do care, you care a lot”
He sat up and brought his knees to his chest, clenching his jaw so tight his face started trembling.
He had to unclench it so he could open his mouth and gasp for air because his lungs were tightening in his chest and he knew he just had to let go. He shook his head to nothing and fought it again. He would not break. He couldn’t.
But then he remembered he was all alone. Just him and his mind and... he stopped fighting for the first time in years and allowed his feelings to pour down from his eyes.
Javier clenched his jaw again as he felt the thick, years old tears pouring and pouring, clouding his sight, flooding his face.
“Fuck,” he muttered to nothing, resting his face on his hand and his arm on his knee, his chest struggling with the silent sobs he was drowning in.
Javier cried for around an hour.
He allowed himself to cry, to cry for you, because if he had allowed himself to fall in love with you and he had allowed you to wield power over him, he deserved a chance to fall apart as well.
He had earned it.
His tears of grief and pain became tears of anger and pain.
He was so angry; at himself, because, thinking again about everything you had told him, you had said something right; he had dragged you into having whatever the hell you two had. He had kissed you and practically turned your wrist into starting something with him only, and just only because he felt lonely. Because he felt like maybe, for the first time in decades, he could have something good. Because he felt like maybe it was time for him to love and be loved again when, in reality, he didn’t deserve to be loved by anyone.
He had let himself believe you could be something else, less complicated. But how wrong he was… Him? Loved? As if. Him? In Colombia? Laughable.
That country… It became more than clear how much he had lost by going down there.
He huffed again in between tears at how it took a massive hit to the heart for him to realize how much he had lost in the years he had been there.
He was so angry; at the system. The fucking system that forced you and him into taking assignments you didn’t deserve to take. There wasn’t another moment he hated more right then, than the moment he had said yes to returning to Colombia. His dad was right, he didn’t like what he found. And it truly changed him before he could change it. How he wanted to have listened to him, how he wanted to not be the stubborn ass he was and just… said no.
And you? You had taken an assignment that promised unreachable things, one that forced you into turning into a liar, one that didn’t let you be yourself.
Fuck, was he really trying to find justifications for what you did even though you had broken him in pieces?
He was so angry; at you. For lying to him and from dropping the facade, for taking off the mask that he had rushed to love, for thinking he deserved the truth instead of you leaving once everything was over. He thought it would have hurt less if you had just… disappeared.
He wouldn’t be crying at three in the morning on his bed if you had just vanished into thin air.
Javier remembered seeing the hope in your eyes when you were telling him the truth, who you really were, he saw it and he wanted to tell you he forgave you. But neither of you deserved something that good.
He was sure it all was some kind of karma. A penance for all his sins, a way too high price he had to pay for all the shit he had done.
He realized then, while sitting on his bed in the middle of the night, the same one he had shared with you for nights that felt burned into his memory, that you and him weren’t so different.
That you two had more in common than he had first thought. That you, as he had said to you before, when you were still wrapped around his arms on that same bed, were a person who was willing to do anything for a greater cause. That you as well were capable of doing anything if you thought it did good, that you also were capable of sacrifice, of losing everything as long as you were doing what you thought was the right thing.
And you had told him, as you cried your eyes out in front of him, facing him and facing and taking all the repercussions of your actions, that you really thought it was the right thing to do.
The realization was truly bittersweet. He didn’t like that even when you had broken his heart and stepped on the pieces as you walked out, he still understood why you did it.
After that despaired, miserable night, he decided he was done bringing you to the front of his mind, so he shoved all the memories of you and tried to repress them in the back of his head along with countless others he didn’t rather to address.
The next day he stepped into the office with less than half an hour of sleep he had seemed to catch while condemning himself in the solitude of his room and avoided looking at your still cluttered desk. Full of you.
He ignored Stoddard when he asked him where you were as he stepped out of the office to head to Cali an hour later and while the elevator brought him down to the lobby he tried to drown the way the mention of your fake name made him feel.
That morning you walked directly to the CIA office, every step you gave into the embassy hurt in your body, mind and soul as if each one had a dagger embedded deeply and an invisible hand was twisting each dagger deeper. You felt the weight of the world on your shoulders. You entered, unannounced, into Stechner’s office, not even trying to hide the enormous amount of pain you were going through. You were tired of hiding things.
“Ah, my favorite DEA agent,” Stechner said when he saw you walk in “well, not anymore, I guess.” he smirked and you felt his gaze linger on your body, shamelessly.
“Let’s just get this over with.” you muttered, crossing your arms on your chest.
“Oh, this is more than over, alright?” the man leaned back on his chair and reached a manila folder that rested on top of others on his desk and raised it so you could see it “resignation, what a word,” he said, putting the folder back on the desk, opening the folder and taking the sole sheet of paper on his hand “really? after you failed almost epically?” Stechner smiled humorlessly and took your resignation letter in both hands and… ripped it in half.
You drowned a gasp.
“You have a flight to Washington today at noon.” he let out softly, feigning a comprehensive tone.
“Of course I do.” you mumbled, dropping your arms to the sides, feeling your eyes flood with tears as you saw him tossing the parts of your resignation letter in the trash can.
You blinked the tears away and quietly took a deep breath, halfway achieving a fake sense of stability you had fed yourself since the night before.
What were you thinking, after everything you did they would have let you get off easy? Of course not you silly girl.
“Oh, honey, you need a hug?” Stechner asked with a teasing gaze and a fake tone of worry “I bet breaking up with Peña really did something on you, you look like a mess”
You tightened your jaw and rolled your hands into fists, Stechner noticed, and his mocking face dropped.
“Anything else?” you asked him, voice hardened, with your eyes staring right into his, admonishing him, warning him. He knew what you were capable of, you knew he did.
He shook his head twice, and you lifted your chin up.
“I really wish you the best, sweetie.” he mumbled, dropping his gaze to his desk and trying to ignore the way your face turned into a scowl at the endearment.
“No, you don’t, you fucker,” you all but growled wanting nothing more than to erase that seemingly permanent smirk off his face that grew after he raised his head to look at you “you’re happy that I’m getting out of here like this,” you chuckled bitterly “you wanted this to happen, I hope you’re satisfied.” you let out all the venom you had been keeping inside you for that man in the last sentence you spat to him.
“You’re right, but I won’t say it,” he tutted and shook his head slowly “you really cost us a lot, sweetheart,” he mumbled and you were sure you were about to spit foam from the rage inside you “I hope you know that.”
You sighed and smiled bitterly at the man. Ever so fucking disgusting. For the first time in your life, you wanted something bad to happen to someone. And you didn’t regret it.
“I won’t ever forget it.” you spat at him in a soft voice that made him glare at you with a serious face.
You turned around and walked out of his office, leaving the door open, feeling his stare on your back.
Feeling, then more than ever, the insides of your mind finishing crashing down. Finally broken. Fully broken.
You walked towards the elevator and pushed the lobby button, hoping to dissolve in the way, hoping the elevator floor would just break and the void swallowed you and your body crashed against the concrete floor of the second basement.
But instead, the doors opened on the DEA floor and Stoddard stepped inside, shooting you a concerned smile as the doors closed.
“Hi, Florencia,” he looked at you and you tried to give him a smile, knowing you failed “you okay?” he asked, you blinked a few times before looking at him. He pushed his glasses up.
“Yeah!” you let out in a squeal “just peachy.” you drifted your eyes away and sighed again.
“I… thought you were in Cali.” Stoddard let out after a few seconds, you turned to see him with your brow furrowed.
“Cali?”
“Well… yeah,” he shrugged “the boss and the guys went back to Cali this morning.”
You let out a sigh, of both relief and worry.
“Oh,” you said under your breath “no, I…” you shook your head and tried to smile at him again and failed, this time he noticed “I needed to take care of something else.”
“I see,” he mumbled, the elevator doors opened and you stepped out “you sure you’re okay?” he asked, looking at you, you nodded several times.
“Yeah, Stod,” you assured him, trying to make him believe it, not quite sure if you believed yourself “I’m fine.”
Stoddard nodded at you as the elevator doors closed and you waved him once goodbye. Knowing it would be the last time. You walked out of the embassy in complete and utter shame, and some part inside you screamed that you deserved it.
Javier rescued another witness that day, because he still wanted to do something right even though he didn’t feel right himself.
But then, after sending Guillermo Pallomari to Miami, he had to return to his office. That place he had thought was his fortress, and then it was turned into… a dungeon.
He didn’t ignore your cluttered desk this time; he was alone in the office, there was no one that could say anything of him if he just… looked around.
A steel cup filled with different colored pens and only red markers, a pile of unsigned DEA reports, in one of the drawers a block of sticky notes running low, the same ones you made notes on and stuck on files when you reviewed them and that Javier hated to see because they were just so fucking bright, your red coffee cup you used when you didn’t have time to grab some at his house because he just kept kissing you until you both were late, which didn't happen at your place because Javier always woke up before you and started the coffee machine, a gun holster you hated to use because it just never clutched the way you wanted to your jeans and a small, brown journal he had never seen before and that he took because there wasn’t anyone that could say anything of him if he just… looked around.
He hesitated for a moment to open the journal, unsure of himself or of what he would find. The first page had your initials, your real initials written on the far left corner and just a list of names he didn’t recognize, next a few scribbles and a phone number. Javier skimmed through the pages and around the middle he found his name. Written in your pretty handwriting, with a few numbers underneath that looked dangerously close to file codes.
He snapped the journal closed and left it where he found it. He shouldn’t have looked.
In his office he found all the documents you had risked so much to gather and all the intel you just handed to him, pretty much as he had handed you his heart.
Javier let out a sigh and grabbed the folders, sitting behind the desk and opening the first one.
He re-read every single piece of information until his eyes stung from the exhaustion, or the cigarette smoke, or maybe more unshed tears he was once again fighting so hard to keep inside him.
Tears of sadness, it was a given. But also anger, and frustration and pain, and, as a bucket of freezing cold water, years of regrets fell on him.
Javier had tried, had tried hard to bury all that shit in some far, deep corner of his mind, as he had tried to bury you and all his memories of the last four? five? months. He really did. But at that moment, sheltered inside an office that didn’t feel like his anymore, past midnight, alone and so damn vulnerable, it all rose to the surface and he found himself drowning inside a sea of his own mistakes and past sins.
It was unbearable to stay there. So he grabbed the files that felt like burning in his hands and took off.
And so, Javier went back to an empty apartment that even though had been his for a long time, felt emptier than it had ever felt without you and reminded him only of you.
Why had he allowed his house to become a fucking shrine to the time you had spent there?
Everytime he looked at everything, from the fucking lamp at the corner of the end table to the damn waterbottle you left the last morning you were there on his kitchen counter, an image of you invaded his mind. Like a suffocating wildfire, spreading with the simplest blow of the wind. Covering him, trapping him, burning him and turning him into ashes.
That night he drank almost all the alcohol he had left in his house and even then, with his body full of booze, his intoxicated mind all the time returned to you. To your face, to your eyes and that color that was so common yet somehow looked so unique, to your voice and how you called his name either on a whisper or on a scold, to your smile and how apparently you had one only for him, to your hands and how you used them one night to touch him and the next morning to grip a gun, to how you drove him crazy from the very beginning. Fuck, he loved you. And he hated you all the same.
You gave him your resignation letter, you had left a job you claimed you loved so much that you had taken on something that did you so much wrong. You quit because of what they made you do, and probably, just probably, he had to do the same. Because of what they did to him.
Was it worth it? Everything he did… Was it worth something? Anything?
He thought again of everything he had done in the past decade and felt sick at what his brain was showing him. It really wasn’t.
The idea of doing something good, doing something that could give him a little peace invaded his mind and he spent half the night thinking of something he could do to finally, finally feel like he was helping.
The next morning he found himself sitting in the conference room with Crosby hovering around him. He huffed at himself, sitting there as if there was nothing wrong going around, with the ambassador looking at him with his ever so present judgemental smirk, as if he wasn't just pieces of a man that put himself together with the weakest glue when he got dressed that morning with less than two hours of sleep after being trapped inside his house that smelled like you with nothing but alcohol and time to think. His pop was right, they did something to him in that country. He just didn’t know what.
“Y’know how many times I’ve gotten a call from the Department of Justice and State the same morning?” Crosby rhetored, Javier looked at him, already tired of the lecture he was about to get “count ‘em on one finger, guess we have you to thank for that.”
Javier dropped his eyes to the oak table in front of him and absentmindedly tried to draw a pattern with the tip of his finger while half listening to Crosby telling him about his meeting with the Colombian president to demand that the gentlemen of Cali stayed in jail. He looked back at his boss and after half a second of pondering he told him he had a draft indictment of the president’s ties with the cartel, omitting the part of the story where he had drafted it half drunk the night before. And of course Crosby laughed at it.
Javier huffed again at himself when Crosby suggested he kept the draft to himself and he felt his blood starting to boil. He sighed and fought the urge to stand up and leave. What was he thinking? That a man like Crosby would back up a man like him? Just like that? What a naïve thought.
“The DOJ’s not gonna topple a government, Agent Peña,” the ambassador told him, obviating the statement, Javier felt his chest turn “you can’t tell me you’re surprised by that.”
“Some part of me was holding out hope, I guess.” he muttered to Crosby, who walked around the table and stood next to him, Javier didn’t even bother to hide his face from him, god how tired he was of hiding.
“Well, you should tell that part to grow the fuck up,” Crosby spat and Javier drowned a bitter chuckle “no, I mean it, Agent Peña, you should be happy,” the ambassador said and Javier frowned at the man “you played the system like a goddamn fiddle, you won.”
Javier opened his mouth to rebut the statement but Crosby just walked behind his chair and left the room, leaving him with the word in his mouth.
He felt his stomach toss in disgust, at his boss, at his job, at himself. Fuck that.
“Yes, sir.” he mumbled under his breath.
Did he really win something? The job that helped him escape from everything, the one at some point of his life felt like a dream, had become a nightmare. The woman he grew to love, after years and years of not feeling that, barely got out of there alive and the name he had whispered in extasis wasn’t even hers. Everything he had once believed in was melting away like wax on a candle and being washed away by a sea of regret, desolation and anger.
Did he really win something when he had lost everything? He had even lost himself in the process of what he and everyone around him had called a once in a lifetime opportunity to end a War that was so familiar to him it almost sat at the table on Thanksgiving with him and his dad.
And when he got out of the conference room, with the weight of the world on his shoulders, the idea of following your steps and quit became a lot more attractive to him.
So he went back to his empty home filled with your memories, resigned that he wouldn’t sleep much that night either, and stood in the middle of the living room, not knowing why he felt like a visitor in his own house, chain smoking, thinking about everything just because he wanted to stop thinking about you.
Javier walked to his window and dwindled himself to watch the cars down the street pass, the city was so unaware of everything. The country was so unaware of how it was being torn apart by the same people that were elected to take care of it. And he was so fucking angry, at everything and everyone, at himself. And so tired. Exhausted.
The phone rang behind him and he didn’t even flinch at the sound, even when practically no one called his house phone. He just let the machine get it.
“Hi, Javi, uhm…” he stiffened in place when he heard your voice and turned his head to eye the cradle “I know you probably don’t wanna listen to me right now but…” you sounded small, your voice sounded thin, Javier turned around and walked towards the phone “uhm, I wanted to apologize again and…” he felt like he couldn’t think, his mind was filled with your voice as if it were a fog that clouded his vision, he wanted to pick the phone up, he wanted to ask you where you were and tell you to come home to him, but his brain wasn’t letting him “I–I’m in Washington and I tho–thought…” his eyes closed on themselves when he heard you sigh and choke down a sob “forget it, uhm, I just… fuck…”
Javier looked at the phone, the sound of static still there, he pondered if he should just swallow his anger and his newfound pride and just pick up.
“I think someone will contact you about this and I just wanted to let you know I–I didn’t tell them anything about... us…” he heard you chuckle softly and he just stood there, rolling his hands into fists, waiting for you to say something else, “I’m sorry, Javi, uhm… I really think I did the right thing by telling you, I’m just sorry it had to be like this…” you sniffed on the phone and Javier sighed, “I guess I also wanted, uhm, to hear your voice… shit.” he closed his eyes and grabbed the phone.
“Hello?” he said and gripped the receiver when the sound of the cut line replied to him.
Javier threw the receiver on the floor and sat on the couch, cursing at himself for his weakness and his hesitation altogether.
He rested his head on his hands while thinking on the few things you had said, if you were in Washington talking to the directives that meant they didn’t let you resign, that meant they were firing you. And you called him to let him know his involvement was minimal, because still after everything you were trying to divert the backlash from him.
God how he was tired.
That’s when he decided, he was going to do it. Not only for what you had made him feel, but because he just needed to leave back all the baggage he had been carrying with him for almost a decade. He needed to let go. He knew it, he needed to free himself of something that turned him entirely into a different person that wasn't even close to what he had been before, because no one else would do it for him.
And he had nothing else to lose. Absolutely nothing.
Once that thought occupied his mind, he finally could lay down on the couch and sleep.
The next morning Javier just re-dressed and called his journalist contact, he had decided, in his pre-sleep haze, that he was just gonna tell the truth. To everyone.
Just as you did with him, he was going to use all the information you had given to him to redeem yourself of your own baggage to get rid of some of his.
Even when he didn’t want to think of you, you were still helping him.
And the truth went out as he told it, and he let himself out of the whole situation by following your steps.
Until the ambassador called him into his office later that day and that time… Javier felt like he could tell the man absolutely anything.
He had nothing else to lose.
When he walked into the office Crosby was watching the news about his little interview. Javier walked and sat in across from him, feeling something that looked like freedom. But his mind was still reeling with guilt and loss.
“You didn’t really call the country that we’re guests in a narco democracy.” Crosby asked without asking, Javier looked at the man and shook his head once.
“Are you sayin’ that it isn’t?” he replied, looking at the ambassador tightening his jaw.
“The state department’s livid.”
Javier nodded a few times.
“Good, they’re responsible,” he let out and shrugged slightly “we all are.”
“Samper is not going anywhere.” Crosby let him know, quite exasperated. Javier dropped his eyes to the man’s desk.
“Well, at least people know the truth.” he said, including himself in the sentence. No more lies.
Javier saw Crosby shake his head and study the four walls that surrounded them, and he caught himself wanting to read him like you would be able to.
“I want you gone, Peña,” the ambassador told him, Javier guessed so “so do the colombians.”
“I understand, sir.” Javier replied and Crosby said nothing else. He looked at the ambassador for a few seconds and saw also a shell of a man. He guesses that it wasn’t so much the job that took a person’s humanity, but the context in which they do it.
He stood up and walked towards the door.
“You know…” Crosby called, Javier turned around “any aspirations you had for your career just got dragged behind the barn and shot.”
Javier licked his lower lip and allowed himself to look intently at the ambassador, the man looked at him with something he thought was pity.
“I resigned from the DEA this morning.”
Crosby stood up straighter when he heard it, Javier said it almost solemnly, and saying it out loud not only made it more real, but it really made him feel light as a feather for the first time since he was a teenager when he walked out of the ambassador’s office for the last time in his life.
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ptersparkers · 4 years
Text
put your head on my shoulder
summary: jake virtanen’s got his eye on a certain friend of his. 
notes: uh, hey! this isn’t meant to be long but i had an idea and needed to get it out of my system. this is an x reader insert but i wanted to try writing from a different perspective and challenge myself. enjoy!! 
warnings: mentions of alcohol and general dumbassery from brock <3
masterlist n stuff + add yourself to my taglist 
(as a reminder, im NOT writing for outer banks anymore so please don’t add yourself to a specific list. you’re gonna be disappointed lol.) 
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***
The girl who had Jake’s attention at the beginning of the night was slowly losing her patience when she noticed his eyes wander instead of focusing on her.
Jessica, in her prim little black dress that was short enough for her liking, came to the house party with the intention to have her dress taken off by none other than Jake Virtanen after one of her friends had mentioned how easy it was for her to do it. The girl wrapped her lips around the beer bottle seductively every time she went to take a sip, watching as his Adam’s apple moved with every syllable as he spoke.
She knew the host of the party and knew he was friends with some of the Canucks players, and knew it would be easy to get lost in the crowd of other Vancouver locals and visitors who were there to celebrate a successful week of wins. Jessica was sure to arrive fashionably late with her best friend by her side and paid no attention to the gazes of other men down her body, her own mission to find Jake more prevalent than lustful stares from drunk men.
Jake entertained the girl when she spotted one of their mutual friends, who was standing next to him, and made her presence known when she said hello over the loud music. Their mutual friend adopted her into the conversation and she put herself right next to the player, tucking herself by his side in an attempt to distance herself from the other partygoers beside her. She didn’t think Jake minded after seeing him give her a close-mouthed smile and licked her lips.
If Jessica could remember correctly, her friend had hooked up with Jake a few months back and, to her knowledge, was still single. She tried to remember how her friend had managed to seduce him with a few drinks in both of their systems and little conversation. Jessica was itching to leave the party with Jake’s hand in hers (or find the nearest unoccupied bedroom because she wasn’t picky) but the pleasant conversation between Jake and their mutual friend seemed to keep him preoccupied, leaving Jessica no room to interject.
After a while, their mutual friend excused themselves to say hello to another individual at the party and the group that had gathered to talk began to disperse or left to grab another drink. Jessica considered the best way to seduce Jake without being completely upfront and forward.
But when her eyes looked at his face, she could see his mind was elsewhere.
They continued the conversation from before but she steered the discussion to get to know him; where he was from, what he did in his free time, and how he knew the host of the party, all of which she knew but wanted to hear anyway. Jake spoke to Jessica nonchalantly and seemed to reciprocate the kindness Jessica was showing him. To her, it seemed as if he was genuinely interested in her advances because he didn’t shrug off her hand that she put on his bicep nor flinched when she swatted his chest whenever he made her laugh.
Jake’s eyes began to wander a few minutes into their conversation and she was wondering if he was looking for someone in particular. His tattoos were on full display and all Jessica could think about was his arms wrapped tightly around her, encouraging her to continue the mission she set herself on. She licked her lips more, tried to fix her posture to make herself look more appealing in the moment, and made intense eye contact with the hopes that he’d pick up what she was putting down.
However, her efforts would be unrewarded when he excused himself from their conversation, leaving Jessica standing alone. One of her friends had pulled her into their circle but she watched from her place as Jake traveled to the front of the house and could make out his white shirt until he stopped near the front door. She couldn’t see much past the bodies in front of her but saw a pair of arms—that looked to be from a woman—wrap themselves around his torso for a brief moment before letting him go.
Jessica wondered who the girl was and did her best to listen to her friends speaking but watched from the corner of her eye as Jake arrived with you, a girl she had never met before.
Jake walked behind you as you approached where Jessica was standing and waved hello to the people in the group Jessica was standing with. She looked at Jake and saw that his gaze wasn’t on her anymore but on you as you introduced yourself to those you didn’t know, including Jessica herself.
“God, it’s loud in here, huh?” you said, laughing at your own comment.
“Maybe a little too loud,” one of Jessica’s friends chimed in. “I can feel my ears ringing.” 
“I’m Y/N,” you said, giving Jessica a friendly wave.
“Jessica,” she replied with a nod and reciprocated your smile, though not as genuine. “How do you know the host?” 
“Work friend! He invites me to these things and I’m not one to go out every weekend but Jake convinced me to go.” Jessica watched as Jake looked down to your smaller figure and grinned.
“Hey, everyone needs a good Friday night,” he said.
“Amen to that!” Jessica’s best friend exclaimed before finishing her drink. 
“How do you know Jake?” someone asked. Jessica was relieved that she didn’t ask the question because she felt like she would’ve been invasive if she did.
“We met through Brock and Elias,” Jake explained. “She used to work at this coffee place they go to and I guess they stayed in touch after she left. The rest is history.”
Jessica witnessed Jake put his arm around her shoulder, letting his hand fall and watched as you leaned into his side. She watched as his grin stayed painted on his lips and sighed.
Eventually, the conversation took a turn and the small group that gathered for a while had dispersed throughout the gargantuan house. Jessica followed her friend to the spacious balcony and was pleased when Jake made the executive decision to do the same. But her hopes lessened when she saw Jake lead you to a less crowded part of the balcony.
Jessica watched as he used his right hand to squish your cheeks, laughing at your contorted expression and your pouted lips. She watched as he put his arms on your waist and moved your body to the beat of the song as you spoke. She watched as you took his hands and began examining them as if you’d never seen his body before and witnessed as Jake grinned at the sight of you comparing the size of your hands to his.
She could hear you two speak in the hum of the night despite the volume of the music inside and the chatter of people on the balcony.
“Your hands are so soft,” you commented, toying with his fingers and clasping them with yours. Jake laughed and used this to his advantage, pulling your body flush against his. “You’re so soft.”
“I’m not soft,” Jake mumbled in the crook of your neck, hiding his face from view as you feel his breaths on your neck.
Your hand was still wrapped in his and Jake made no effort to let go. He maneuvered so that your body was in front of his with your back flush against his chest and when he heard you laugh, Jake’s cheeks deepened into a rose blush. His hands clasped around the front of your body and moved the two of you as if a slow along was echoing through the balcony and he watched as you bit your lip. He let his cheek rest against the top of your head, a content smile resting on his lips.
“Are they together?” Jessica asked Brock, who came outside with the girl she came with. The blond looked at her before glancing at where you two stood, grinning knowingly.
“Not yet,” he said.
“Yet?”
Brock looked at Jessica, who he knew in passing and saw only at public events and parties, and shrugged.
“I don’t really know how to explain it,” he explained. “They’ve been friends for a while but he’s very gentle with her.”
“So they’re dating, then?” she asked.
“Like I said, not yet.” Brock smiled politely and left her standing on the ledge in favor of speaking with another friend.
Jessica watched as Jake spun you around to face him once more and used his hands to cup your face, his thumbs stroking your cheeks as your eyes fluttered close in pure delight. He murmured what Jessica could make out as “I want to kiss you” and watched as Jake waited for your consent before keeping his hands steady and pressing his lips to yours.
Jessica couldn’t watch anymore without feeling invasive so she left the balcony to find another drink.
“You. Are. So. Cute,” Jake said in between kisses while squishing your cheeks between his palms. He laughed as he watched your eyes widened in surprise at his actions before removing his hands to slip by your waist once more, pulling you closer to him.
“We aren’t just friends, are we?” you asked him as you put your hands on his chest, toying with the chain around his neck.
“You’ve always been my girl,” he confessed. “I haven’t thought about being with another girl for a few months now but I think I’ve felt this way ever since you chewed Brock out for standing on a swivel chair.”
You laughed at the memory and tugged on his chain mindlessly and Jake watched as your fingers wrapped themselves around the gold material and dug his fingers into your hips. You squealed and Jake laughed at your reaction.
“Come home with me,” you mumbled before widening your eyes. “I mean, not like that. I just want to go home and watch a movie.”
“Mm,” he replied, dipping his head to pepper kisses along your jawline. “That sounds nice. Stop to buy snacks on the way home?”
“You are the perfect person.”
Jake laughed and pulled away, holding your hand in his as he made his rounds. The both of you said goodbye to mutual friends and both Brock and Elias gave you two thumbs up.
His hand was on your thigh on the drive home and he kissed the back of your hand when your eyes were fluttering shut.
“Don’t sleep on me yet, pretty girl,” he said gently, squeezing your thigh. “You can sleep when we get home.”
True to his word, Jake let you sleep, wrapped up in a blanket with your head on his chest.
+++
taglist: 
@thedemonsimpofcamphalfblood​ @kerwritesthings @oc3an-vib3s @kaitieskidmore1​ @becihadshawn @storiesbymads​. 
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britishassistant · 4 years
Text
The Villainous Paranoiac Just Wants An Uneventful Holiday (Part 1)
This is not how you wanted to spend your break.
The school was supposed to be empty. Everyone except the Octavinelle trio was supposed to be gone.
Not to say you don’t enjoy your friends’ company but. No magic-using people means no magic-spewing overblots.
You were looking forward to just bringing the fairies their firewood and working on your winter homework while taking the first opportunity in a good long while to unwind with Grim and the ghosts. No investigations to worry about, no weird dreams to get worked up over, no overblots to frantically try and survive.
You wanted a break.
This? Marching 10km into the desert with the rest of Scarabia dorm for the third day in a row due to their leader’s looming psychotic breakdown? This is not a break.
Although...
There’s definetely something rotten in Scarabia dorm, you think to yourself as you watch Viper-senpai hand out skeins of water. Kalim-senpai had no problem using his unique magic yesterday, and yet today he acted like Grim had mortally insulted him when he asked for a repeat performance.
If the outburst had been after two or three other instances of Kalim-senpai using Oasis Maker and receiving what he felt were insufficient thanks for it, then his current attitude would make a little more sense. But taking umbrage after using it just once? And being universally praised by everyone else the rest of the day for it?
It doesn’t add up.
Even deranged behavior has some sort of internal logic to it, as Rosehearts-senpai and the Rules of the Queen of Hearts have taught you. Even with how nonsensical all 810 rules are, it’s rare to find a scenario where one rule actually conflicts with another— all of them usually work smoothly in tandem with the goal of having an orderly unbirthday party in mind.
Even if they do violate most forms of dignity and common sense.
Kalim-senpai’s behavior though? It’s erratic without rhyme or reason, bouncing from nice to mean and back again seemingly as he enters and exits a room. He insists you and Grim stay and participate in this asinine “training”, despite the fact that you both belong to a different dorm, and are technically rivals to Scarabia in Magift and exams.
If you didn’t know better, you’d say it’s almost like he’s trying to imitate Rosehearts-senpai before his overblot—and doing poorly at it.
And with how much Viper-senpai has been invoking parallels between the current situation and what happened back then...
The smartphone Crowley gave you is a cold, heavy weight in your pocket. Its charge ran out yesterday, which is unsurprising given how many times you dialed and redialed the dumb bird headmaster’s number only to be met with his voicemail. You can probably recite that stupid message by heart now. You’ve heard nothing from Ace and Deuce either.
One thing is clear; no one’s going to help you out of this mess but you.
“Kalim-senpai?” You brace yourself as you step towards him. “Can I ask you something?”
“What could you possibly question me about?” He barks, glaring down at you haughtily.
“Well, I was just wondering, what’s the point of all this?” You fight to keep your nerve as his posture stiffens. “I don’t mean any disrespect, none at all, but you do want everyone to do better in Magift and exams, don’t you? I was hoping you could explain to me how the parades and defensive magic training are supposed to do that. I apologize for my ignorance, I’m nowhere near as smart as you, but could you please tell me why we don’t just practice Magift and brush up on the class material inst—”
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Your head’s ringing.
You think you hear faint yelling, though it sounds like it’s coming from somewhere far away.
Your cheek aches.
Numbness blooming into a sharp stinging throb that feels like it’s growing with every second that passes, burning hotter than the sun above you.
You cautiously poke your tongue against your teeth, but none feel loose, thank the Seven.
Damn, the desperate, near-hysterical thought flits through your head. Even a pampered rich boy like him has strength behind his hits, huh?
The rest of you is just trying to process what the Hell just happened.
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“How. Dare. You?!”
Asim-sama looms over you, red eyes burning with fury.
It’s a fight to keep yourself from curling into a terrified ball under his gaze, tucking into yourself as though seeing less of you would abate the anger, the shouting, the hurt, like you used to when you were a child.
“You dare to question my methods, my leadership of this dorm?! You? A sniveling street rat leeching off my hospitality?! Do you know who I am?!” He rages. “I am Kalim al-Asim! I am the Head of this dorm! I don’t have to explain ANYTHING, justify ANYTHING to the likes of you!!”
You knew, you knew you were pushing your luck when you first asked, but you thought it would just be yelling, like it was before. You can handle yelling, nothing Asim-sama can say could ever be worse than what you’ve already heard.
You didn’t think he’d hit you.
You didn’t think he’d hit you.
You didn’t think—
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“DON'T YOU TOUCH MY MINION, FGNAH!”
Your arm whips out almost on instinct.
You jolt forward slightly as Grim collides with it, hissing and spitting like he really was an irate cat, the flames in his ears flaring brightly enough that some detached part of you is worried about getting burned.
The other Scarabia students are reaching for their magic pens.
“Lemme at ‘im! Lemme at ‘im!!” Your friend howls, fighting to get past you. “Forget butt on fire, I’ll BURN IT TO A CRISP FOR HURTING MY MINION!! I'LL STEAL EVERYTHING YOU HAVE AND SELL IT FOR LUXURY TUNA!! THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR CROSSING THE GREAT GRIM—”
“No, Grim.”
Your friend halts in his flailing to stare uncomprehendingly at you. “But Yuu—!”
“It was my fault.” You say, trying to keep as much emotion out of your voice as possible. Tears and trembling only show weakness, only make them worse. “Asim-sama was just correcting me. He was right to do so. I shouldn’t have questioned him. I overstepped my bounds.”
Asim-sama sniffs. “At least you know your place. Be glad I don’t punish you anymore than this.”
“What?! He slapped you for asking a question, you can’t possibly believe—” You gather Grim into your arms and hug him close. You quietly thank the Great Seven you at least have him, trying to hide the quiver in your limbs by burying your face in his fur.
But that’s exactly why you can’t let him do this. It’s just the two of you, you can’t win against an entire dorm of wizards like you did against the ghosts. Maybe if Ace and Deuce and Jack were here...but it’s just you. You need to protect your friend in the only way you can. “We can’t win this. Please, Grim.”
You feel him grumble, then a paw carefully pushes at your forehead. “Hrm...I’ll show mercy for now, so geroff already. It’s too hot for you to keep hugging me like this, I’m cooking here fgnah.”
Despite saying so, he settles onto your shoulder, tail smacking your arm as it flicks irritably.
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“If you’ll excuse me, Asim-sama.” You duck your head slightly. “I will remove myself from your sight and head back early as penance for my behavior. Once again, my deepest apologies for insulting you.”
Asim-sama gives you a curt, dismissive nod.
You turn and make your way through the crowd of Scarabia students, snatches of muttered conversations floating to your ears.
“How could he—?”
“Just for a question?”
“Isn’t that going too far...?”
“Unforgivable...”
“Prefect.” Viper-senpai takes you by the shoulder, turning you to face him. “Are you alright?”
“I’m fine.” You reply monotonously, eyes on the sand below you. “Just...just need to be by myself for a bit.”
His lips purse and you can feel him study your face. He presses a full water skein into your hands. “Take this. Even if it’s not as cold as I’d like, it should help with the swelling some. Plus you need to stay hydrated out there.”
“Thank you, Viper-senpai.” You nod, keeping your eyes down.
“And Prefect?” He squeezes your shoulder, voice lowering only a fraction. “I am truly sorry about this. All of this. It will not happen again, you have my word.”
It would’ve been a nice apology, had you not caught a glimpse of a smirk on his face.
You nod, making sure not to outwardly react to that or to the way the whispers of the other Scarabia students turn from the condemnation of their dorm head to the exaltation of the vice dorm head. You begin following the tracks in the sand back to the main dorm.
The sun beats down on your back as you take a swig from the skein and pass it to Grim to drink from. He’s still grumbling about how you should’ve let him recreate his rampage at the entrance ceremony.
For your part, the distance and good company have let you pull yourself out of that headspace enough that you can try and look back objectively on what happened.
Your mind keeps circling back around to one question: why did Asim-senpai hit you?
Based on your interactions before this, Asim-senpai doesn’t seem to be the type to resort to physical violence as a first response, or even a last one. Which means something in your question likely backed him into a corner enough that the normally pacifistic dorm head felt lashing out physically was the only way to get you to stop.
...Like the fact that he couldn’t answer it?
Even when screaming abuse at you, his ultimate response was that he wouldn’t explain himself to you. Is that because he didn’t want to? Or because he couldn’t? Does Asim-senpai himself not know the reasons behind his own actions? But how can someone act without knowing or meaning to, without being under the influence somehow?
Under the influence.
People acted without knowing or meaning to thanks to being under the influence of Buchie-senpai’s Unique Magic during the Magift incident. But he went home, you saw him leave, so what...?
You pull out your notebook, flipping through the pages with sweaty hands until you get to your records of the testimonies from the incident. You scan through the testimonies from Scarabia students, hoping to find something, anything—
Oh.
Oh.
“Motherfucker.” You hiss, staring at the page in dismay. You are an idiot. You are the biggest idiot, you make Deuce look like a genuis, how could you forget about this?? It was only the key testimony that helped pinpoint Buchie-senpai and Savannahclaw as the culprits behind the injuries. And it explains so much— why you kept agreeing to stay here despite wanting to go back to Ramshackle so desperately, almost like your mouth was speaking without your consent.
“Minion?” Grim asks, pushing the water skein back onto you. “What’s wrong?”
You snap your notebook shut and slide it back into your pocket, taking another fortifying swig from the skein. “Grim? Think we can get back soon enough to work on the escape route in our room before the others arrive back for lunch?”
“If we pick up the pace a bit, yeah.” He hops back onto your shoulder. “But what’s the rush? We have all night tonight to work on it.”
“Let’s just say the sooner we can get out of here, the better.” You mutter, cogs and gears turning in your head as a tentative plan begins to form.
This is not how you wanted to spend your winter break.
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strawberrywritings · 4 years
Text
By your side
A/N: Heeelloooo I feel like I haven’t written in forever, so I’m just gonna drop this here. This idea came into my head while watching a youtube video. Please make sure to get a regular check up and stay safe! This is not a specific character, I left it blank so you can choose your fav😘🥰 Enjoy! 🍓
Warnings: mentions of sex, angst, not proofread (if you find anything else, please tell me!)
/ Masterlist
He sighed, sitting down on the couch of the clubhouse, opening a beer bottle and bringing it to his lips. His friend was sitting opposite from him, rolling a blunt. “Aren’t you going home?”, he licked the edges to close it, lighting it with a match right after. “No”. “This is the third time this week you’ve been doing overtime. You got a girl home, man, why are you staying here?”. There was a pause, which made the man’s eyes look up to find your boyfriend with his brows furrowed, his stare fixated on the now empty bottle in his hands. “I think she wants to break up with me”.
The confusion was clear on the faces of the men inside the room. They all knew you had eyes only for your Mayan, so the statement from your boyfriend came as a surprise. “Did she tell you that?”, another guy asked. “No, but-”. “Then stop!”. “But why does she avoid me? She has been working more, using every excuse to get out of the house, we haven’t had sex in a month. She didn’t say it out loud, but her actions say otherwise”. Now, the men were all silent. They didn’t know all the details of your private life, and they didn’t know what could be going on inside your head.
“Have you told her how you feel?”, one voice spoke up, making your boyfriend scoff. “She should be the one telling me what the fuck’s going on”. “I know, but communication is key, even in these situations. Go home and talk it out. If she wants to break up, it’s better not to drag this on and end it now, not lead someone on about a relationship”.
/
At home, you were cleaning the house from top to bottom. You hated house chores, but you’d do anything to keep your mind busy from thinking. You were so concentrated in cleaning the windows that you zoned out, not hearing the door open and close, signaling he was home. You were made aware of his presence by putting a hand on your shoulder, making you slightly jump.
“Oh, hi”. “Hey. What are you doing?”. “I’ve cleaned the whole house today. It reminded me why we split the chores”, you chuckled, and he smiled. “Why don’t we sit down for a bit? I’ve been thinking about something”, he quipped, and you mentally gave yourself a pat on the shoulder: you face was emotionless, but you were scared as fuck.
Once in the living room, you sat next to each other on the sofa, and you were trying to keep your cool. None of you spoke, waiting for the other to do it first. Then, you took a deep breath and faced the situation. “I tried to hide it, I’m sorry. If you want to leave me, I get it, I don’t blame you. But I promise I wanted-“, you were rambling, but he stopped you, a scowl on his face. “What the fuck are you talking about?”. “What do you mean what am I talking about. You saw it. that’s why we’re talking. You’re breaking up with me”. “Wait. Wait… - he put a hand forward, bringing it to his temple right after, to massage the skin – I thought you were breaking up with me!”. Now it was your turn to be confused, and a bit offended. You loved him, how could he think that you would break up with him?
“No. No, I’m not. Why would I?”, you asked, raising your tone just a little. “I don’t know, you tell me! I am not the one that’s been avoiding you, you know? We haven’t been intimate in almost a month. What else am I supposed to think?”, he raised his shoulders, his hands fumbling in the air as he talked. Your throat was tightening up and your eyes were getting a bit watery, your hands clenched in your lap. “You saw the papers from my latest gynecologist checkup, right?”, you asked, your voice breaking at admitting the thing that you had been keeping form him. “The gynecologist-? What the fuck?”, in his full confusion, he saw how your eyes widened and your lips parted. The room fell silent, both of you staring at each other until he sighed, his back colliding with the back of the couch as he brought his hand to his face.
“You have been avoiding me – he stared – you have been working more, going out more, and it looks like you don’t wanna be with me anymore. The sex… I hate to be that person, but it must mean something if you don’t wanna have sex with me. What’s going on? What does a gynecologist have to do with it?”. He knew you couldn’t be pregnant. You had talked about kids and decided that both of you were not ready yet, so that couldn’t be the reason why you were turning away from him. You got up without saying a word and went into the bedroom, Him hot on your heels, saying “You’re not walking away from this conversation”. Then, you reached into the drawer of the desk, taking out a few sheets of paper and handing them out to them.
He read the report, sitting down at the end of the bed and passing a hand over his face. “I’ve had problems for a few months, I didn’t want to have sex and I forced myself to do it, thinking it was going to be just a phase and I’d get back to enjoying it… I thought there was something wrong with me. I tried to blame it on the stress, on work, on not feeling well, on not being in the mood.”, you gulped, trying to make the lump in your throat go away. “Turns out, my contraception made me get the vagina of a woman in menopause: no lubrication, no libido, nothing. I got scared that you wouldn’t want to be with me anymore. I’m sorry”, you whispered the last part and then you broke down in tears. He immediately hugged you, kissing your head and letting you cry, releasing all the tension that had been around you for weeks.
“Sweetheart, I don’t care about this. Fuck, when you told me you went to the gyno I thought there was something more serious going on”, he detached his body from your and gently held your face in his hands, kissing the tip of your nose. “I love you with all my heart and this thing doesn’t change what I feel for you. We can use lubricants, I can spend more time on foreplay, or we can do it when you feel like it, set the mood... I’m sorry you had to go thought this alone, I would have understood, baby”. Every few words, he dropped a kiss on your face, first your forehead, then your nose, then your cheeks, your lips.
Your crying had turned into sniffles as you nodded your head, “I should have told you, I’m sorry”. “Don’t be sorry, baby. – he stroked your cheeks with his thumbs, his eyes locking with yours – I love you. I love you so fucking much. I thought I had lost you”, he sighed and dropped his forehead against yours, his eyes closing as his hands made their way over your body, latching his arms around your waist and pulling you against him. “Never”, you smiled at him and pressed your lips on his. “Now come on – he pulled you up from the bed, a grin on his face – let’s cook dinner and then I can take care of you. A nice massage and cuddles to make your night better, whatcha say?”, you chuckled while nodding your head, he really knew how to make you feel better.
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writing-gifts · 4 years
Text
here’s the 6th part of the incubus!doppio AU!
im gonna start posting this on ao3 too (with some editing in the earlier chapters so you can check that out if you wanna)
list of parts
@wasabi-mommy @mistabrainr0t @the-average-mastermind
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“OW! What the hell--why’d you bite me so hard for!?”
You try to move your leg but Mutton blocks your way. Letting out a sigh, you stand in place and look down at the cat.
“What? What is the problem?”
He moves behind you and presses his head against the back of your calf hard enough to affect your balance. When you move your leg forward to stop yourself from falling, Mutton walks towards the door.
“Do you want me to let you out? But you just got here.”
The cat looks at you for a moment before placing his front paws on the door and stretching upward towards the knob.
Shaking your head, you walk over to the door. “I’m gonna get that cat door for you one day, I swear.”
Once it’s open, Mutton quickly circles your legs and pushes his head against them like before.
“Okay, okay I’m going!”
You walk out and the feline takes a few steps towards the forest ahead before turning to look back. His multicolored eyes stay locked on yours and you purse your lips when you realize what he wants.
“I guess I'm following you….”
After locking and closing the door, you walk after the cat as he continues into the forest. You wonder what exactly he’s so desperate to show you. Was this even normal behavior for cats? You weren't sure but you did know that Mutton was a little more on the intelligent side. Sometimes you even felt like he could even understand you.
So you go along with it, following a distance behind through what seems like endless trees and brush and fanning random insects out of your face. Fortunately, the weather was cool enough that you weren't sweating too.
However, the longer you walk, the more you fear that you might be lost. Trying to find your way back on your own would definitely make it worse though.
Just when you think you need to take a break, a body of water appears in the distance through the opening of the trees. When you and Mutton finally exit the packed foliage, you see that you’ve been led to a lake sitting in a giant clearing in the forest.
You stare a bit amazed at the size and notice a cabin near it a distance away. Mutton doesn't stop long to let you marvel at the scene though and continues towards the lake. You catch up to him and the both of you walk alongside the water.
“So do you know the person in the cabin?” You assume that’s where you're headed.
You didn’t expect a response, but Mutton merps to acknowledge you. You hum and your gaze quickly finds itself back on the lake. It was vast, going on so far you could barely see where it ended. The sky and trees reflect on its surface clearly and the water’s so still you almost feel like you can jump into the clouds if you want to.
Once the two of you are closer, you see that the brick and wood cabin was partially sitting on the grassy land behind it and partially on the water. You had also underestimated the size. Perhaps more than one person lived here?
Mutton leads you around the side of the house and stops to sit next to the front door. He looks up at you expectedly so you reach out to knock.
Several seconds pass before you hear the door being unlocked and when it opens, a handsome man with a neat, dark bob is revealed.
Unsure of what to do, you give a quick greeting and go quiet afterward. You didn't plan what to say when the door was answered, you just knew Mutton wanted you to knock.
Said cat walks into view, rubbing against the man’s leg as he walks into the house.
At that moment, realization seems to cross the man's face and he smiles at you.
“You must be the neighbor,” he says.
“Neighbor?”
“The person who lives in the house outside the forest. I saw someone moved in but never came around to introduce myself.”
"Oh, I had no idea anyone lived out here."
"That’s pretty much the reason why I’m out here.” The man moves to make room so you can walk inside. “Would you like to come in?"
You're a little hesitant since you just met but Mutton had no issue with it apparently. And the cat had actively been prepared to attack Diavolo for you on multiple occasions.
The moment you pass the threshold, you’re instantly awed. When you thought of cabins, simple and small came to mind. This one was neatly organized but it didn't give the homely vibe you’d expect.
The monochromatic room was spacious and decorated with nice looking furniture and curtains. The living area consisted of a fireplace surrounded by comfortable looking couches, and the stone wall above it held shelves that were crammed full of old looking books, various expensive looking decor and bottles. And to the right, closer to the back of the room sat a sizable dining set.
However what mostly grabs your eye is the fish tanks that were embedded in the walls throughout the room. At first you wonder why he had so many, but when you look closer you realize that they were not, in fact, separate tanks but a giant aquarium partially hidden within the walls.
Was the whole house like this? What type of cabin was this?
While you wonder where all the fish are, something twinkles in the corner of your eye. You turn to see what it is, but there’s nothing there.
So I'm imagining things now...
“--drink?”
You turn your attention to the man. "Sorry what was that?"
“I asked if you wanted anything to drink?”
You cross your arms and shake your head. “No I’m good…so do you know why Mutton led me here?”
The cat currently sits on the top of the back of one of the white couches.
“I actually needed to discuss something important with you, but I should introduce myself first. I'm Bruno Bucciarati--you can refer to me as either--and I'm a witch.”
You’re immediately skeptical. It wasn't unheard of, obviously, but you couldn't just believe whatever anyone told you. Bruno doesn’t look bothered by your dubiousness though.
“You're smart enough to not trust blindly. That’s good.” The man puts a finger to his chin. “You have a leaf on your shoulder.”
Before you can reach up to brush it off the man plucks it off you. Then just as quickly as he picked it off, the small green leaf begins to glow and transforms into a full flower.
You stare shocked trying to find any way to explain what you just saw. It was no trick of the eye either as the leaf’s form changed right before you into a completely different thing.
The man--no witch holds out the white rose and you gently take it.
“I--wow I just keep running into supernatural beings or something.”
"This forest does seem to attract them," he says.
Interesting…
You roll the flower stem between your fingers. “I’m ____ by the way.Uh, I don't know if you call him Mutton too--" You tilt your head in the direction of the feline. “--but is he your familiar or something?”
“No, he’s just a cat that likes to wander the forest. However, my familiar's over there though if you’re interested."
You get closer to the tank the witch pointed out to observe and even though you weren't exactly showing it, you were actually really excited and interested by the fact that you just met a witch.
At first you don't see anything in the huge tank other than greenery and a rocky cave ornament in the corner. But then something pops its head out of the opening. An eel that also managed to match the color scheme of the room. It was mostly white and covered in black patterns with yellow sprinkled in. It comes out of its hiding spot and swims back and forth as if it were stretching out it’s long body. Then it turns to you when it realizes that you're intently watching through the glass.
Your smile at it’s somewhat funny face and tilt your head a bit. The eel responds by tilting its own head, as if curious by your action.
"Holy crap. This is actually pretty cool! Do they talk?" you ask.
“Not really.” Bruno's smile falters. “But surprisingly Mutton does.”
“Huh?” You snicker a bit thinking the witch is joking but see that there’s no sign that he is on his face.
You look over at the cat and he stares back unblinking before glancing at Bruno.
"....I thought we weren't going to tell them."
Your heart almost jumps into your throat. “W-What?”
Bruno hums. “I thought about it and decided there's no point keeping it secret any longer. The incubus already knows. So it would only be a matter of time before he said something."
You're still reeling from Mutton talking that you almost missed what Bruno said.
“Hold on...Wait. Incubus? Are you talking about Doppio?” you ask the witch.
“Yes.”
You squint confused. “He knew and he didn't say anything? How long ago did he find out?"
"About a week," Mutton says.
"It might have benefited him in some way but I'm not sure why he didn't say anything," Bruno adds.
You exhale, somehow already on the verge of irritation with...everyone. Doppio was usually open with you, but apparently he thought this was a good thing not to mention.
You stare at Mutton who looks at you like he usually did, as if this weren’t an issue. But that was far from the case for you. It wasn't explicitly said but you were sure he told Bruno things about you, and it left you disturbed.
“...Well is there anything else I should know about Mutton?”
"Well his name's not actually Mutton," Bruno says.
"It's Leone Abbacchio, but you can call me Abbacchio."
You grimace from the human sounding voice coming from the cat you had been cuddling practically since...since you moved here!
“Okay Abbacchio, I don't really want you snooping around my house anymore--
“That can be arranged,” Bruno interrupts. “Once we ‘exorcise’ that demon constantly visiting you.”
Your already furrowed brow deepens. Doppio wasn't possessing anything though. You weren't even sure he was capable of that.
“No, I don't want that!”
"Listen, it might seem like Doppio is harmless, but things can become dangerous if he grows too serious of an attachment to you. And if it makes you feel better, we won’t need to hurt him if he leaves quietly."
You weren't exactly sure what the witch meant by "dangerous" but his serious tone managed to spark some anxiety within you.
"I mean it would be natural for Doppio to get upset if I suddenly wanted him gone."
"He's not just talking about being upset." Abbacchio says, annoyance in his tone. "Doppio could literally keep you against your will if he wanted and there would be no way for Bruno to reverse it."
"All demons are naturally envious creatures and the way things are going between you two, it’s only a matter of time. And this doesn't even take into account the other demon." Bruno says.
Diavolo aside, you couldn't bring yourself to see Doppio in that light.
"But--"
The front door slams open and the temperature in the room seems to drop.
Doppio stomps in, his face flushed. Once he sees you he seems to relax slightly but his expression is still irate.
“I finally found you!” he exclaims.
Bruno raises a brow and turns to Abbacchio.
The cat's ears fold back in frustration. "I was sure I lost him."
The incubus walks up to you, stopping too close and grabbing your shoulders harshly. “Are you okay?”
“Doppio you're gripping me too tightly.” You push off his hands and wrap your arms around yourself to shield your body from the sudden chill that seemed to appear. “I’m fine….But they're talking about you being able to keep me? What does that exactly mean?”
You wanted to hear an explanation from the incubus himself. You trusted him not to lie to your face if you asked him straight on.
However, Doppio reacts strangely, as if he's afraid. He makes some space between the two of you and struggles to look at you. You try to catch his gaze again but he refuses to keep eye contact.
"It's…" He strains his fingers. "Well, you see, incubi and succubi can form a….c-connection with a weaker being if they’re close enough. Then they could technically stay together forever."
Abbacchio grunts, "Way to sugar coat it--"
“I wouldn’t do that to you though ____! I didn't even consider it! U-Unless you wanted to it would never happen and I know that you like your space…”
The incubus is the most stressed you've seen him.
Even though you were still upset you didn't like seeing him like this, so in an attempt to ease him, you try to smile. Unfortunately, it comes off pretty strained.
You take a moment to mull over what he said though and come to a conclusion pretty quickly. "Even though that was kind of vague...I think I understand. And honestly, I can't see you forcing me into that."
You'd never seen a cat roll their eyes until now.
"Typical human. They're a lost cause Bruno. Let's leave them to do what they want," Abbacchio says before stretching and laying down.
The witch looks disapprovingly at the cat. "You know I can't do that. Perhaps they actually were charmed. I could--"
"Sir," you say to get his attention. "I appreciate your concern, but I trust Doppio and I'd prefer if you didn't get in between the two of us."
Having to tell your almost neighbor you just met to buzz off even in a polite way wasn't what you were expecting to do today.
Bruno doesn’t look upset though. He's quiet, studying you with an unreadable expression but then he nods.
"I'm having Leone check up on you. If anything seems off I'm getting involved."
Your brows furrow slightly. Didn't you just explicitly say you didn't want Abbacchio snooping around your home anymore?
You want to argue more but the witch didn't leave room in his statement to negotiate. And even though you hate to admit it, keeping the supernatural out of your home wasn't exactly your strong suit. It pissed you off but you couldnt do anything about it. So you give a curt nod and immediately walk to the exit with Doppio following closely behind.
Once outside, you follow the incubus through the forest. There's a long, awkward stretch of silence between you two though.
Doppio tries to sneakily glance at you, which you of course you notice but you choose to ignore it. However, after the 50th one he finally decides to say something.
"____?"
You sigh, "What?"
He slows to a stop to turn and look at you properly but, again, he has trouble keeping eye contact.
"Are you mad?"
Maybe at first but now it had changed to more of a disappointed feeling.
"Not necessarily but you knew about Mutt--Abbacchio and didn't say anything to me. So I'm not exactly happy right now."
"I didn't but--"
You shake your head. "No Doppio. I'm too tired right now to understand whatever weird logic you formed in your head."
His mouth closes and the hurt on his face instantly makes you regret your choice of words. Maybe you shouldn't have said it like that but you really didn't feel like listening to excuses right now.
You look away from Doppio. "Let's just go, please."
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angleicblossom · 3 years
Text
Levi Ackerman One shot <3
im so so so sorry its this long i got totally carried away 
More soft Levi x sad oc because I feel the need to project my own feelings into a situation that will never really happen 😊.
Another day of training finished at around 7pm, I slowly made my way into the mess hall to have a meal before heading to bed, not like I was very hungry anyways.
These last few weeks, maybe months, I hadn't been feeling myself, not like I was a very outgoing person to begin with, but I at least tried to socialise with the others but now it feels like a chore so now I don’t even bother, I just wake up go through with my day, eat if I can and then sleep and recently it's been making me frustrated with myself causing me to snap more than I usually do during training and I think people are starting to notice.
As one of the first I was able to grab a plate with food on it quickly and slide into the end of one of the benches in the bottom corner. I picked around at the meat, vegetables and potatoes moving it around a little, not really having an appetite. A few people slid into bench alongside me and in front of me, it was Hange, Erwin, Eren and Captain Levi, they made small talk around me, I didn’t pay much attention to them and then I decided to get rid of my untouched food.
“Oi, where do you think you are going Kasey?” Levi voices called out and stopped me in my tracks and look back at him but avoiding his eye contact that he was sternly holding with me “I'm... uh not feeling the best” is all I could muster up as an excuse “well maybe if you ate a little you would feel better, you can't sleep on an empty stomach, right Hange” Commander Erwin commented and Hange nodded along spooning meat into her mouth, I sigh internally but put on a smile and nod whilst making my way back to the corner to wait them out but Levi grabs my wrist causing me to pull and resist a little on instinct but he ignores it “Eren move down so Kasey can sit next to me” Levi ordered and Eren tilts his head but moves anyways “can’t have a solider skipping meals” he says bluntly and nods his head towards the plate and so I sit down next to Levi, a little too close to the point of our thighs touching but he doesn’t seem fazed by it and continues eating his half eaten food along with the others, I can still wait them out.
I poke around it some more and eat small bites of the vegetables for another 10 minutes and by then it was only me and Levi left at the table, he lets out a loud sigh next to me and pushes his plate away from him and takes a sip of his tea “are you really not going to eat that” he turned his face to me and look at me then the plate with furrowed eyebrows and I just shrugged “ Captain, I don’t feel too-” “yeah yeah you don’t feel good, of course” he rolled his eyes and didn’t even let me finish making a bit of guilt fill me, he was only looking out for me “anyway your dismissed I hope to see you eat more” I nodded and never moved quicker to get out of the mess hall with Levi’s stare burning me in the back.
I made it to my room which I thankfully didn’t share with anyone, I unbuttoned the top two buttons of my shirt and undid all my straps and took them off to try feel a bit more relaxed, I took a long shower I think I was in there for about 25 minutes maybe more and I changed into a tank top and some shorts due to the summer heat that was creeping up on us. I brushed out my damp hair so there were no knots after doing this it was around 9pm and I was now laying on my bed staring at the ceiling when I suddenly heard a knock at my door making me snap my head towards the door and then it began to open.
“Who is it” I say, trying to see the person entre “Its Levi” He answers as he continues to push the door open with his foot because his hands were holding two cups of tea? I rush up to help him and open the door then close it behind him “is everything okay, Captain?” he just looks me up and down, nods and carefully sets one of the cups of tea on my nightstand next to my bed and then takes a seat on a spare chair at the end of my single bed. I felt a little awkward seeing him like this, he had a black long sleeved fitting top on, and some black sweatpants and he came here in his socks too, I looked around the room not keeping my focus on him “the tea is for you” he nods towards it and takes a sip of his own “I added some tea herbs that go well with the black tea that helps to calm you” He continued on and it was sort of...cute hearing him talk about something other than killing titans or anything titan related really, I smiled lightly and took the tea in my hand and took a sip, testing it out I had never had black tea never mind herbs.
I can feel Levi watching me intently as I remove the cup from my lips carefully “do you like it” I thought about it for a few moments, it was a little bitter with a tint of citrus to it as well “I like it, Ive never tasted something like this” I shift my eyes to him and take another drink before sitting it down and Levi keeps his in his lap, holding it in his unusual way. I was still confused on why he was here, and I wasn’t sure if he was going to tell me, I looked at him again and he was looking down into his teacup and swirling the tea around “I think I was a little harsh on you or maybe too blunt” he says out randomly and I'm shocked by him expressing this to me “oh no Captain please-” he cut me off again “just call me Levi there’s no need for the formalities, I've been watching you here and there during training and noticed how you aren’t doing as well as you used to do” so someone did notice, but Levi was the last person I would expect to notice a random cadet feeling blue about her life, I didn’t know how to answer him so I just looked down at my bare legs in front of me and he lets out a small sigh and piches his nose “Look.. I’m.... worried about you Kasey” after he said this, I feel the heat rise to my cheeks and try to hide it with my hair and grab the teacup and drink some more of the tea to distract myself, he coughs a little and shuffles around “I don’t want you to get injured or injure yourself if you aren’t looking after yourself here”.
He gets up and makes his way to sit next me on the bed and moves my hair from my face to behind my ear and I move my face away from his hand quickly after this and furrow my eyebrows “Kasey...” “sorry I'm just not used to being touched” he was quick to answer “don't apologise” I just nodded “are you.. Enjoying yourself being a cadet, Kasey?” this question makes me look up at him and he continues “is it that you don’t want to be here anymore? Are you regretting your decision picking the scouts?” he questioned, sounding a bit sad and I bite my lip, it's not that I don’t enjoy it I just don’t know how to, I fiddle with my fingers not knowing how to answer him “don't stay silent, I want to help you”  
I look at him with tears starting to swell up in my eyes, but I don’t let them fall out of my eyes “it’s...it’s not that, Levi I, I can’t feel anything good, I never feel happiness or relief or anything after I finish my training, I... I can't even talk to anyone because I don’t know how or what to say and it feels so exhausting even trying to interact with others, all I would do is let them down, there’s just nothing for me here... or anywhere, sometimes I wish to disappear, so I don’t have to live like this, I want to be able to feel all the good emotions but it's like... they just don’t exist inside me anymore and I don’t know how to get them back and I feel so alone here like no one understands this and I can't explain how I feel it's not like I should be this sad right? but I can tell you... I don’t regret joining the scouts” I put my face into hands and let tears out and I try to stifle my cries “H-how can I help you Kasey” he leans into me, I wipe my eyes and sit up straight and look into his eyes, why is he here.  
Without thinking I put my head into his lap and fling my legs up onto my pillow so I'm lying on my side staring at the door, I lay my hands on his knees and he tenses up a little “just... stay here with me, Levi?” I ask more than say and I feel him stretch over me to set him teacup next to mine and sit upright again and he starts to run his hands from the top of my scalp to the bottom of my almost dry hair “okay... I will” I sigh with a bit of comfort knowing I won't be alone, for tonight at least, “Levi... why did you come?” his hands pause for a moment then returns to their actions “Honestly, I'm not sure, I just had a feeling I had to come see you, but I must admit Kasey... I've always been a bit more than... interested in you and I didn’t want to leave a bad impression since we’ve only spoken a few times” I went wide eyed for a moment, more than interested? What did that mean? I didn’t give him an answer only feeling a bit of surprise hearing this from the Captain, I sit up and look at his lips then his eyes “what do you think of me, Kasey?” I didn’t know how to answer or what I wanted to say to him.
I lean in and close my eyes and Levi’s hand snakes up to cup my cheek and our lips touch and I furrow my eyebrows and lean in more, putting one of my hands on his lap and another on his chest. Levi begins to take the lead of the kiss a little more, tilting his head and with his other hand he pushed my hair away from my shoulder, I try lean in even more and Levi pulls away “you were almost pushing me over” he let out a small breathless laugh and rubbed his hair, I blush at how in the moment I got, and I mumble a sorry to him and catch my breath whilst looking at my lap, I look back up at Levi and he’s already looking at me, “what was that for?” I nibbled on my lip again and looked away to the side “I didn’t know what to say” Levi grinned a little “I’m glad we’re feeling the same way... sort of... don’t worry, I might not be able to bring your emotions back per say but... I can try show you that no one wants you to disappear and that you are never alone” he ducked down to look into my eyes that I was avoiding “okay?” He reached for my hand and lay his on top of mine and I blushed again “okay” I whispered back with a smile.
“it’s pretty late, aren't you tired?” I shrug and fumble with my fingers “a little, are you?” “a little” he replied back “that single bed looks a little cramped for the both of us, would you like to come back to my room?.... you don’t have to” “that would be nice” I answered without a second thought on that, sharing a double bed with Levi? Yes please.  
We both head out down the very quiet, cold and dimly lit corridors, turning right once and left once a few moments after the right turn before reaching Levi’s office, I've been in his office many times delivering notes and other things that Hange wanted to give him but always sent me, he opens the door and lets me walk in first then comes in after then closes and locks the door “this way” he says and takes me to another door that is where his bedroom must be. When I entre there is a big double bed with white silk sheets and a wooden headboard in the middle of the room “come on” he says quietly and opens the sheets for me to hop into the left side, I quickly snuggle into the sheets and bring them up to my nose, the smell of Levi surrounding me, he goes around and takes off his top, I couldn’t help but watch his back muscles move as he done the action I blush a little and look up at him once he turned around and gets into the bed with me and I suddenly feel a lot warmer than I already was “are you okay with this?” he whispered “yes” I whisper back and giggle a little at our hushed tone “good” he moves towards me and pulls me into him, and I let him, totally indulged in his warmth and scent, he rests his head on my head  with his arms wrapped around me  “get some sleep” “you too” I say and put my scrunched up hands on his chest and place a small kiss in the middle of his chest and drift to sleep
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riofann · 4 years
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Rio Random 3
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TW: Alcoholism
Part 1    Part 2 
You don’t hear from him for the next month or so. He doesn’t pay you any visits, no calls or texts. Nothing radio silence on his end. You contemplated calling him but what would that do? Nothing! Nothing he could say or do would make you feel any better at the moment. Plus you couldn’t just go back to him with open arms even though you wanted to. There were many levels of betrayal here and a simple I’m sorry wouldn't fix things, it couldn’t.
You were woken up from your sleep on the couch, typical for you these days. You were too afraid to sleep in your bedroom afraid that anything could happen and you being in the back of the house away from the door and windows didn’t make you feel safe. You hear the knock again before sitting up. Slowly you walk down the steps, when you look through the peephole you see Mick getting ready to break in before you open the door. 
"Hey" you say using the door for support
Rio steps into your house before speaking, irritation laced in his tone “What were you doing we were knocking for a long time"
“I was asleep, you could just break in like normal.” Mick steps in after Rio “Hi Mick” 
With a head nod Mick says “Sup”
You close the door and lean your head on it. You were still sozzled. Another thing you picked up after the great revelation. You would drink yourself to sleep every night. 
“You aiight?” Rio asks leaning to the side to look at you “Hmm!” You perk up. For a second you had forgotten he was there, you walk past him, Coconut your dog runs over to Mick who in turn gives her all the pets she wants as they retreat down to the bottom half of your home. You quickly rush over to where you were sleeping and grab the tumbler and drink the remaining liquor before rushing to wash it. Rio doesn't say anything but watches you. 
“Want something to drink?”  You turn to face him, doing your best to not look as drunk as you felt before he can answer you, grab a glass and make the infamous Bourbon on the rocks. “HEY MICK!” “YO!”  you hear him rush up the steps
“If you want food or drinks help yourself,” 
“Cool cool” he retreats back downstairs to watch the game. “Come on Coconut!” You smile
It was cute seeing him with Coconut, a Samoyed, who looked like a teddy bear had come to life with Mick of all people. 
“I was gonna say tequila”
Tequila is your favorite liquor 
You roll your eyes “Please you know you love bourbon it's your girlfriend's favorite drink”
Without speaking he stares at you making you nervous, thinking that he knew you were drunk. You quickly make conversation "to what do i owe this visit?”
“Came to check on you see how you doing, you haven't texted or called”
“You haven't done the same either” you counter
“I am a busy man”
“I have a target on my back”
He looks at you before speaking “We both do”
“Fair enough, we can both do better let's just leave it at that”
He nods in agreement “Just came to check on you”
You look at the clock on the oven “At 1:00AM”
“No better time than the present” he says flashing his infamous smile 
You nod, “I guess” your anxiety was starting to get the best of you again. You were able to pretend so long as he wasn’t around but now it was becoming more difficult by the second. 
“You aiight?” he says as he notices you taking lots of deep breaths “Yea i just need to lay down”
You walk towards the bedroom without even looking back at him, you assume that he planned to spend the night. You hear him walking behind you and you become more panicked. You rush into the bathroom before he reaches the bedroom. 
“Thought you said you were sleeping” he comments noticing your bed was made up 
“Yea on the couch!” you answer from the bathroom
He takes a seat on his side and starts to undress himself getting comfortable in nothing but boxer briefs
You sit on the toilet and do your best to calm down. You reach for the flask in the vanity drawer and  take a few gulps before you put it back in its hiding spot, a few more breathing techniques and you feel calm enough to walk out. He watches you as you walkover to your side of the king sized bed. He always hated it. It was entirely too big for two people let alone one person. 
You avoid all eye contact. If you thought you looked drunk he would definitely pick up on that. 
When you lay your head on the pillow the room feels like it's spinning before the feeling slowly subsides and you feel yourself falling asleep.
“Y/N”
“Hmm?” you hum
“I came to talk to you” normally you would be alert and waiting for him to talk but this time you’re avoiding any type of conversation 
You sigh “Your timing is impeccable!” 
He chuckles he missed you. He missed having to deal with a grumpy you, who didn’t get enough sleep, missed how you were so picky over ice cream, missed how you smelled, how your skin felt under his finger tips, missed your sarcastic mouth that always irritated him
You sit up and move closer to him grabbing a pillow to put on your knees so you could lay your head on it. “Okay i'm listening”
He says nothing but looks at you, 
“My name is Christopher”
For a second you want to thwack him with the pillow. Is this why he came over to tell you his name?! 
When you look up at him there’s a look of vulnerability behind his eyes. You get the sense that he was being truthful
“Okay what do you want me to call you then? Christopher or Rio?” He smiles lazily, he was expecting you to roll your eyes and fuss at him “whatever you want mama” he reaches over and rubs your leg
“I like Rio, maybe i’ll call you Christopher when i'm mad at you”
He chuckles “fair enough,” he clears his throat. “My name is Christopher, people know me as Rio. I am a divorcee to a lady named Rhea and we have a son together named Marcus.” 
You smile at him “nice to meet you Christopher”
“I’m single by the way so you know”
“Why are you doing all of this?”
“I don’t know how things like this go, I’ve never “dated” girls it was always we vibe together cool we together. I’m trying something different, you don't like it?”  You shrug “No its just odd......”
“I meant it when i said i cared about you, Beth and I are a thing of the past only business”
“What did you do break up with her yesterday?”
“More like a month ago” 
“How did she take it?”
“How most women do? Cry got mad at me typical shit”
You nodded “okayyy”
“Im serious Y/N I want to be with you,” 
You didn’t respond but laid down next to him, when you woke up in the morning he was gone. You sigh in relief. You didn’t want to discuss him wanting to be with you in greater detail. As far as you were concerned words meant nothing when it came to him. He always spoke with his actions. Nothing changed besides him revealing his name to you. He was back to being the mysterious person in your life. I guess since he told you the truth there was no need to pretend anymore. No late night calls asking how you were no more frequent pop ups. 
The next time he does show up, he’s nothing but irritated. Standing outside your door for almost 10 minutes knocking, just to break in. When he finally locates you on the couch there's a bottle of tequila beside you, cap half screwed on even Coconut’s excited yipping doesn’t wake you up. 
“Do me a favor find every liquor bottle you can in here and get rid of it” 
Mick nods in agreement before he returns to petting Coconut
You wake up the next morning in bed wondering how you got there the last thing you remember watching was Scandal before blacking out. You hear commotion near your kitchen area, you get scared but hear Rio’s deep voice and relax a bit. You get up and ready to go to work before walking out of the room. 
Without thinking about him you look in the cabinet that housed all the liquor
“It’s not there”
He scared you, you had forgotten he was there, you take a few deep breaths before turning around to face him 
“Where is it?”
“Don’t worry about it”
“Rio” 
“Why you drinkin’?” 
“Why not? As far as we are concerned there’s still drugs in my house right?”
He ran his hand down his chin “I told you I’m taking care of it”
“What does that even mean? You don’t text or call nothing just show up out of nowhere whenever you feel like it. What is the definition of taking care of it, if drugs are still being funneled into my house. You don’t  want me drink? When I can smell her perfume around the house after I come home from work? You don’t want me to drink? When I can see a trail of dirt going down or up the steps? At any given moment I could be ambushed by the feds or your enemies.... But you’re taking care of it?! Right? You tell me if you were me and someone kept telling you I’m taking care of it would you believe them?” He remained silent for what felt like an eternity “It's complicated”
“Then uncomplicate it!”
“So what you gon drink yourself to death?”
“YES!.....I mean NO!..... But you can’t possibly think that i am going to deal with all of this by myself without you there and a sober mind”
“Need to grow tough skin, if you wanna stick around” 
“I didn’t ask for this! All I wanted was a boyfriend not someone who is supposedly plotting my demise and telling me don’t worry about it” 
Offended he speaks before he can stop himself “And I ain’t ask to be with no drunk either”
You paused for a while and walked away. Rushing into your bathroom your hands shaking from being extremely pissed and needing that drink in the morning to take the edge off. You quickly locate the flasks in your room thankful he had yet to find those.Once the liquid poison settled in your stomach. You quickly gather the remaining flasks and stuff them in your purse before rushing out the door. You could feel his eyes on you as you left the house. 
When you return home your heart sinks to see his G Wagon sitting in the driveway. Carefully you put the flasks in your purse. You were hoping he didn't make someone follow you because your flasks were now full to the brim with alcohol. 
You open the door and Coconut runs towards you barking and hopping on you. “Hi girl, how are you? Were you good today?” You bend down and pet her, tears coming to your eyes as you realize just how much you had been neglecting her lately, “I promise i’ll make it up to you” you whisper as you continue to pet her. When you stand up you see Rio standing in your line of vision. You walk up the steps to see Mick sitting on the couch watching sports. You wave at him and take the corner towards your room. You had a short window to hide the flasks before Rio would come in. 
When you step into the kitchen you don’t see Mick on the couch instead its Rio sitting by the kitchen counter. You move slowly as you feel the alcohol racing through your veins. You pour water in your tumbler and pull out the bowl of fruit salad that you had made early in the week. 
“Not gon eat?”
It hadn’t even occurred to you that Rio actually cooked until you set eyes on the stove which had multiple pots with simmering food
“Not hungry”
“Late today” he comments 
“Yea” 
“Where were you?”  
You look at him wondering if he was just baiting you or he actually had no idea where you were
“Hello” he brings your attention back to him “Where did you go after work?” “I thought you knew” hinting to him possibly trailing you 
“What you talking bout?”
You knew this question was coming so you pulled out the pamphlet of AA which ironically was signed by the organizer. You place it in front of him. “We can’t have your reputation destroyed can we?” you spew out venom, almost like you were looking for another argument. Which you weren’t you just wanted him to hurt as much as you were. 
He  ran a hand down his face and looked up at you, however you weren't standing in the same spot you were walking back to the room. He wanted to apologize. He didn't mean what he said, well he did but he didn't mean for it to come out as harsh as it did. 
The next day was Saturday and he knew your routine to go to brunch with either your Aunt Brenda  and/or your best friend Mia. He was going to propose taking you out maybe to lighten the mood, get you out of the house so you don’t obsess over things that he was actively trying to fix. Soon after he sits down to drink his water he hears you up and an hour later the clicking of your heels on the wooden floor. 
“Going to brunch” is all you say before you begin to walk down the steps
“Think you can cancel?”
You stop and turn and look at him “Why?”
He shrugs “I wanted to take you out for brunch”
“Okay you can just join us” you offer
“Nah i just wanted it to be me and you” he is now standing in front of you and moves the hair out of your face
You nod in agreement and look down to begin texting.Aunt Brenda and  Mia could keep themselves busy anyway
“Ready?” He asked with a smile on his face  
“Yea!” you answer you walk past him and down the steps
The car ride is silent until you arrive downtown and park a street over. You let him lead the way which brings you to one of your favorite brunch spots a chic french restaurant. He remembered you talking about it and how much you wanted to come back but you and the girls were busy exploring other places. 
When you arrive you get seated, you look down at the menu before looking up at him. You kinda knew what you wanted, you had made your mind up the last time you were there what you would get next. When the waiter arrives he greets in french and you respond
“Bonjour comment-allez vous? (good morning, how are you?)” “Qu’est-ce que vous voulez boire? (what would you like to drink?)”
“De l'eau s'il vous plait (water please)” you turn to Rio. “Rio what would you like to drink?” He smirks before answering “Water”
The waiter then proceeds to tell you about the house specials for today before leaving to get your drinks
“I didn't know you spoke french”
“Yea, Krystal knew that, I guess your girlfriend forgot to mention that”
He had to admit he was lazy in his research about you, trusting Beth would tell him all about you. 
The waiter quickly returned with the water. You two were not ready so you ask for more time. 
He sighed before taking a sip of his water, You had reverted your attention back to the menu. He was really trying hard at this boyfriend thing. Majority of his ex girls were attached in some form or another to his business so it was easier to sit and talk about plans and things that needed to be fixed, than actually have a conversation. However Beth ‘Krystal’ was the last one, he was faced with the realization that someway or another that being part of the business never really made the relationship stronger in fact it made the bulk of it which he realized was not good for anyone involved.
“What are you gonna get?” he asked breaking the silence, he also hated how you could just be silent, he would rather you make small talk like Beth, whether it be joyous or filled with hate
“Im debating” 
“Between”
“Pancakes with omelette or the french toast” you looked up at him 
“Hmm” he held his infamous smile on his face the one that always made you weak to your knees
“You” 
“Eggs Benedict”
You smile at him “good” 
Before your food comes you two try at the small talk thing, out of nowhere you hear her voice
“Hi you two!”
You both look up at her it seemed like she came out of nowhere
You feel nauseous, the smell of her perfume now made you sick. “Hi how are you?”
“Having a little brunch?”
“Yea”
“Mind if i sit”
You look at Rio and before he can answer you say “Sure!” 
He gives you a look both you and Beth can read
“Here I’ll move over”  you offer as you move to the middle seat
The waiter rushes over and gets her order before any conversation takes place
“You didn't tell me our girl could speak french” “I didn’t? Must have skipped my mind”
“How are the kids Krys?” you ask
“They are good.” She says curtly before turning her attention to Rio “So uh the cookies you wanted me to bake are ready”
“I told you i didn't need them anymore” 
“But i took time off to do so can’t you just come by and pick them up?”
“I’ll send Mick” 
You sit back and observe her behavior. She had done herself up slightly more than usual, her cleavage was showing and she was accentuating it every chance she got. They continue to talk in code and it was  becoming irritating to you because you were sitting there eating your food while they could be discussing the situation in your home without you knowing. At this point you had to assume the worst. 
“Maybe you two need a bathroom break,” you interject both of their head whipped around to look at you, both looked bewildered
“Why would you say that?” Rio asked 
You shrug “it seems like there's a lot you two want to talk about clearly not in front of me” 
Rio smirked before answering
Quickly, Beth answered “Actually we could” “Nah we good, Krystal was just leaving.” He flashes her warning look before she quickly excuses herself. 
He can tell that your mood has turned sour and chucks the date as a fail. When you return to your home he speaks before you exit the car “I didn’t know” “I know Christopher,  gotta grow tough skin right?” He sighs before following you inside.
As always tell me what you think. 
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Everytime I try to stop believing..my brain literally can’t not believe. All the hell and back videos I watched as a child, the rapture signs, I don’t want to exist anymore and I’m scared for myself...any advice?
This will be hard to answer but I will try. I’m glad you reached out to someone because these are totally normal thoughts to have when going through a faith transition and they can make you feel so alone, and no one should have to feel that way. I will start by telling you how to recognize what’s going on, and then I’ll give you some ideas on how to logic your way through these thoughts.
First, recognize that this may be a trauma response. This fear is a real sign of religious trauma recognized by real therapists. Fear of hell and questioning your nonbelief is typically instilled into a member of a religious organization—particularly cults—with a specific intent. Think about all of the things your church has told you over the years about God and hell. Maybe there was an ulterior motive to get you to stay. Maybe they knew how it would make you feel. If you can recognize where these thoughts came from, maybe you can start deconstructing them.
Deconstructing your thoughts:
Consider doing research. There are ways to make these thoughts feel less real and scary, and one of them is reading arguments against them. There are good books about the philosophical arguments against god, and there might also be information about your cult that they may have been hiding. If you’re Mormon, I recommend reading the CESletter, watching older Jimmy Snow videos on YouTube (he’s got some good arguments against god as well as exmormon information), and watching exmo lex on YouTube. You could also read The God Argument or other books by atheists, those really helped me when considering whether I believed in god.
As far as actual logic, there are a few things that helped me decide whether I believed in god.
First, think about why religion exists. Before science, people needed ways to explain things like lightning storms and lethal diseases. It made perfect sense that they’d need to assign these phenomena to a deity’s actions. They couldn’t understand it otherwise because there were no scientific communities or grand theories about the universe. It was then passed down, sticking around even into the age of the scientific method, though we technically don’t need these beliefs anymore. If you understand where things come from, it’s easier to dismiss your fears. Maybe the idea of god is simply a coping method for things we don’t understand, whether he’s real or not. Maybe we created him because that’s how us humans are.
Second, decide whether the god you subscribed to even deserves your worship. If you picture the perfect, most loving deity, is he like the Christian god? Does a loving god send people to hell? Does a loving god tell them that they are bad just for who they love or because they had sex before marriage even though marriage is a human concept bound by the imaginary lines of what’s essentially just a legal contract? Maybe there is god, but I don’t think the real god would actually send the people he loves to scream in the fires of hell. And if he does, maybe believing in a terrible being like him isn’t worth it after all.
Third, watch melodysheeps “timelapse into the future” video on YouTube. It’s long for a YouTube video, but in the grand scheme of things 30 minutes isn’t that much time. It talks about what will actually happen in the future according to science as we know it, and im telling you, we DONT MATTER. How is a universe with so much matter, and so little of its lifespan able to support life going to have a god that only cares about us humans? If there is a god, I think he’d be more worried about making supernovas and Hawking radiation happen than sending you to hell. Science is the one thing that makes me absolutely certain there isn’t a god. There’s an explanation for almost EVERYTHING but there’s no explanation for god. Especially the Christian god.
These fears will go away with time. You are valid and your struggles are real. Don’t rush yourself, and focus on healing above everything. If your mind says something is too much, it’s too much, and you’re allowed to take a break. Lastly, I recommend therapy. Not every therapist will know all about religious trauma but they may have coping skills for you. You will know what’s right. Good luck with your faith journey and keep trying.
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