#like im in a better place! im doing better!

[chaosartisan]

You all are so pro mental illness until they forget to take their medication.

You all are so pro mental illness until they start having delusions.

You all are so pro mental illness until they develop brain fog.

You all are so pro mental illness until they start forgetting important dates.

You all are so pro mental illness until they identify neuro divergent traits that you have.

You all are so pro mental illness until they start expressing their struggles.

You all are so pro mental illness until someone can't afford to go to therapy.

You all are so pro mental illness until someone can't afford their medication.

You all are so pro mental illness until it's something that comes attached with a physical health condition or deformity.

You all are so pro mental illness until it comes to advocating for better systems.

You all are so pro mental illness until your loved one becomes mentally ill.

You all are so pro mental illness until they need your help.

You all are so pro mental illness until it comes to doing anything other than saying "I'm pro mental illness."

yall are pro mental illness until they hallucinate

yall are pro mental illness until they dissociate

yall are pro mental illness until they self-isolate

yall are pro mental illness until they're paranoid

yall are pro mental illness until they split

yall are pro mental illness until it's too Scary for your comparatively neurotypical brain to handle

[millersfinest]

can u make some like generic dating ellie headcannons? (tlou universe preferably)

i love ur writing sm!!

dating ellie williams ◡̈

cw: usual fluff, mentioned love languages, mention of joel’s death (i wanted to be as canon as possible), a little nsfw but nothing too crazy.

note: here are some semi-ooc ellie hc’s!! i feel like im so bad at headcanons, but here you go. thank you for enjoying my work, i hope you like this too pookie!

ellie! is a total introvert to her core, so no matter how she found out about you taking interest in her… she’d probably need some time to think about it.

ellie! would have you freaking tf out over it too. but she means well, she’s just a really bad over-thinker—never wanting to say the wrong thing. but she’d come around and never stop apologizing to you.

ellie! would take a little while to open up to you, if you weren’t friends first. she’s been through a lot in her life, and she fears that her trauma could scare people away.

now, if you were already friends (specifically close friends), you probably would’ve already known her deepest darkest secrets and feelings by the time you started dating. every traumatic event and every fixation she’s had since she was a child.

ellie! thoroughly believes in physical touch and quality time as a love language.

for physical touch: it doesn’t always have to be sexual (she doesn’t complain either way), she just likes to touch you—knowing you’re right there next to her. you could be doing the dishes and she’d come up behind you, leaning her head on your shoulder, with her hands delicately placed on your hips. or standing by the bar at the tipsy bison, with her fingers dipped into any of the pockets of your jeans. keeping you close.

for quality time: she does love her moments alone, but they’re always better with you somewhere near by. sometimes, when she would spend hours painting or drawing in her art room, she’d ask if you could come sit in. so you’d bring your book, or whatever you were doing, and read silently in the same room as her. while a smooth record played in the background. but sometimes, she doesn’t even ask. you could be doing the most boring thing ever, and she’d float around you like a curious bumblebee.

ellie! love, love, loves being babied—even though she’d never admit it. she has a reputation to uphold, of course. during the spring, due to the patrols and supply runs, her allergies would wreck havoc on her. that’s where you come in to nurture her back to health. she’d have tissue stuck up her nose, with her head lying in your lap on the couch. you rubbing your hand over her hair, soothingly.

“if you kiss me right now, i think my sinuses will re-open.”

“ellie, you just sneezed two minutes ago.”

“baby, pleaseeeee! i need it!” and she’d give the craziest puppy dog eyes known to man. and, of course, you’d give in. giving her the sweetest smooch ever. it didn’t open her sinuses, but she knew that. just know… she’s gonna convince you to give her another to be sure.

another scenario would be coming home after a long day at work (idk i feel like doing patrols would be like her main thing). she probably had a rough day with the lingering infected, and came back with a few injuries. the moment she stepped through the door, she’d be calling for you. wrapped in your arms, smelling like the outdoors, you’d slowly undress her and then run a bath. she loved when you’d cater to her in that way—cleaning her cuts, washing her skin from dried blood and dirt. after all that, you’d cuddle in bed, pillow-talking until her eyes shut before yours.

“goodnight, els.” smooch.

ellie! was a little iffy when it came to holidays, but when it came to your birthday it was a special affair. jackson was a healthy and happy little bubble, but because the idea of loss wasn’t foreign to her—celebrating her loved ones was very important to her.

if you didn’t like grand gestures, she’d keep it lowkey. maybe throwing a little surprise for the two of you at home; cooking you dinner, having a movie night, and giving you little trinkets she found on the road. or painting something for you in secret, then giving it to you as a gift.

speaking of cooking…

ellie! has thing for making good food. a part of me feels like joel put her on when she was young, and after he died (yeah, i’m sorry) she made an effort to keep it up. playing guitar was much harder for her since she only had two fingers and a thumb on her left hand—so she decided to pick up something else to stay close to him.

so every chance she can get, she cooks for you or both of you. when you would go on patrols, you’d make sure to pick up cook books from before the outbreak since she found them so fascinating. and you loved being her little food guinea pig. spoiler: she was a fast learner so her cooking skills were pretty good.

ellie! 100% taught you to play the song (that we all know and love) that joel taught her on the guitar. and whenever you knew she needed to hear it, you’d play it for her. and, i swear on everything, there’d be tears in her eyes every time.

and for some freaky stuff… (i won’t get into crazy detail but i just wanna be thorough ;D)

ellie! just loves loving you… making love to you—doing everything that she can to almost prove that you’re everything to her (not that she needs to but she does it anyway).

meaning: at the very best, she’s a service!top. however, i can get behind her being a switch/verse (or maybe i’m bias lmao).

ellie! probably wouldn’t strap as often as the fanfics show. especially being in this apocalyptic world—where would you get them?? if they weren’t hella old… and, i feel like she’d think they were a little silly (but if you wanted to try it, she’d oblige because what you say goes).

ellie! loves to watch the expressions of your features contort into visuals of pleasure. it’s how she knew she was being good for you—doing everything that you asked but better!

your first time: of course she was super awkward. not really knowing where to put her hands at first. but once the heat began to rise, and your bodies began to press together, her entire energy changed! she’s her most confident when she’s in service to someone (in some way)—so she makes it her prerogative to make you feel good and comfortable. you weren’t really expecting that from her, though. it only took one airy moan coming from your lips for her to completely flip the script.

her hands were firmly delicate, and she made sure to be very vocal in your ears and over your body.

overall, ellie williams is a very attentive lover. in many ways than just one.

[girrl1nterrupted]

say it

going to a party with billie and her getting jealous when someone starts flirting with you

billies rlly mean in this but I LOVE JEALOUS ROUGH BILLIE FR

-------

it was tense. you sat, hands sweaty from the nerves as your girlfriend sped down the street. her face flush, jaw clenched, teeth grinding. to say she was angry was an understatement; she was fucking livid. billies hand gripped the wheel tightly, indentations visible from the sheer force of her fingers. in certain light, you couldve sworn you could see steam coming out of her ears.

"bils i-", "dont", she replied harshly. her eyes remained fixed on the road but you could still feel the enraged looks she was sending you. "you know it wasnt anything like that", you began. billies eyes darted to you, urging you to be quiet as her jaw clenched harder but, you continued. "she was just being friendly, really". "stop fucking talking", her voice low and strained. "god, whatever", you mumbled under your breath turning away. you immediately felt the daggers she shot into the back of your head. "what was that?", she replied, her voice dry and raspy. you knew better than to push her in this state.

after an exaggerated scoff coming from her, it was silent for what felt like forever, tension heavy and dangerous. you heard frustrated sighs and mutters of words as her speed continued to increase before she finally spoke to you. "you really shouldn't have fucking done that", she said tilting her head towards you. "do what?, talk to people?", you mocked slightly irritated with her. billie squinted her eyes as she stared at you, visibly getting angrier. "fuck it", she whispered as she pulled into an empty dirt car park on the side of the road.

billies door flew open as she paced to your side. "out, now", she demanded. "im not gonna ask again, get. out". there was something so hot about how dominant your girlfriend got when she was jealous. how hot she looked when she was all riled up. getting in the back, you noticed how tense her muscles were, how her veins ran along her arms. she sat, manspreading running her hand along her thigh before gripping your wrist. "get ontop". your mind was racing but you listened, climbing on top of her at an almost embarrassing speed.

"such a good girl when you want to be", she groaned as her hands clung to your hips. her breathing was ragged as she scanned over your body, taking in the sight of you. "god, I told you not to wear this", she tugged at the thin straps of your dress, eyes clouded with jealousy and all the ways she was imagining fucking you. "had that bitch thinking she could flirt with you". her hand snaked up your body, wrapping around your neck as she pulled you into a hard, telling kiss. the way she fought against your tongue, you knew she was trying to remind you whos you were.

slowly, you began moving back and forth on her lap, feeling the rough fabric of her jeans rub against your clit perfectly. she didnt stop you, her hands helped work your hips on top of her. "this how she wanted you?", she moaned down your ear as you felt her smile cockily against your neck. your arms wrapped around her shoulders as she kissed and sucked on your throat, hands rocking you faster on her lap. "fuck bils", you whispered. her hand flew to your neck, gripping slightly too tight. "fucking say it properly, what's my name?". her eyes glistened with anger. "fuck, billie", you whined feeling your stomach twist at how aggressive she was being with you. you fucking loved it.

billie reached for your hand, placing it over the zip of her jeans and smirked when she saw you realise. "is that-", "yeah, and youre gonna take all if it, right?", she slurred. you watched as she undid her belt, unzipping the fly and taking out her cock. she had this devilish smile plastered on her face. "suck it", she mumbled, lacing her fingers in your hair. "fuckk", she groaned as she watched your head go up and down. the sight of you below her, pleasing her like this drove her mad. "dont you look so much better when youre using your mouth like this sweet girl?". "hm?, instead of flirting with other people?", her tone high as she borderline teased you.

billie bucked her hips up, forcing her strap further down your throat, causing you to gag and look up at her. the tears in your eyes only excited her. she pulled you back up, kissing you immediately and reached for her side of the door. getting out, she pushed you back, making you stay in the car before she positioned herself outside the door, facing you. "lay down", she said spreading your spit along her cock. her hands came hard around your thighs, pulling you closer to her. she pushed your legs apart, showing her exactly what she wanted.

"fuck, youre so pretty", she groaned as she ran her finger along your pussy, feeling how soaked you were. "youre gonna learn who you belong to", she slurred before lining herself up with your throbbing pussy. "oh my god", you cried as you felt all of her inside you, filling you perfectly. she began thrusting into you hard, setting a foundation for how rough she was going to be. her fingers dug into your thighs as her pace increased, hitting every right spot. "shed never make you feel like this", she panted, her breathing hitching with every stroke.

you looked towards her, watching as she held her tshirt up with one hand, showing her defined stomach. each thrust revealing more and more of her toned muscles, her face red as she fucked into you. "too deep b-bils", your words broken as your reached for her, feeling as her hand grabbed yours, pinning it on your stomach. "take it, im gonna ruin you". her thrusts turned from deep and hard, to incredibly fast and determined.

as if she could feel it, grunts and low groans echoed out your girlfriend, feeling as you clenched around her cock. "who do you belong to?, say it", she whined, harmonising with your whimpers perfectly. she lowered herself slightly, letting the new angle pound against your g spot at an ungodly speed. "slow down im-", "who do you fucking belong to?", she cut you off, digging her nails deeper into you. "you, only you billie", you moaned as you felt the tension inside you begin to break.

"thats right, mine, mine, mine". she could feel how you tightening around her, telling her you were close. "be a good girl and cum on my cock". "MY cock", she repeated. your body began to shake, legs vibrating against her as you felt her words tingle down your body. "fuckk, bils", you whined as you came hard around her, your pussy pulsing on her cock. she slowed down, still keeping her strokes deep as she let your orgasm drip down her strap, watching as you came undone beneath her.

she pulled out, reaching for your body to pull you up towards her. as she kissed you, it was clear she was satisfied. "you did so good for me", she whispered between kisses. her arms wrapped around you, as you buried your head in her neck. one thing was obvious, you were completely hers.

[cofay]

Soft moments with Katsuki…

It’s an average day you knew being pregnant would be hard but not this hard…gosh this baby makes it look like you’re ready to pop already! But Katsuki always knew how to make everything feel better too bad he isn’t home..

To make up for the time you spent sleeping you made yourself a midnight snack and choose to watch a couple movies not to shabby..as you’re eating you hear the door handle shiver slowly and your husband enter with a huff.

You *were* about to get up but he made it too you with strong strides as he stood in front of you he just gets down in front of you and lays his head on your lap placing his hands onto the sides of your hips.

“Hey baby…” you say softly running your fingers through his thick blond hair, “..Bad day at work?” You ask. He hums nodding his head as a response, you sigh massaging his head as he just lays there in between your thighs.

Moments like these you’ve always comes to cherish it was rare for Katsuki to come home while you were up and it was even rarer for him to be vulnerable yeah he’s can be sweet at times but he would never want you to see him worn out or tired because he just doesn’t want you to see him ‘hurt’ in any way

But hurt or not, happy, sad, hell even angry, you knew you would always love Katsuki until the day you both die

~~~~~

A/n: IM SOO SORRY I haven’t been writing because of sports and I was super sick, and too much has been going on but I do have some drafts that I will post soon!! So stay tuned

[plush-hugger]

im gonna use this as a trivia (??) kind of thing and just answer all of them at once because why not

do you like resting your head in a boys lap, or on his shoulder?: SHOULDER i love hugs

Sweaters or hoodies?: arent those the same thing....

Netflix or clubbing on a Friday night?: a secret third option : going to the mall and buying each other stuff

Denim or leather jackets?: BOTH but i really like leather its prettier

What’s your favorite thing about boys?: eues.... eyes are so prety....aaaaa

How do you like your tea?: absolutely fucking DROWNED in creamer/milk and then like 10000 pounds of sugar

How do you like your coffee?: same as tea also i cannot for the life of me drink hot coffee its only acceptable if im cold otherwise its iced coffee all the time

Favorite fall color?: orange ^_^

Can you drive?: not yet

Do you have a crush?: my BOYFRIEND

What’s your favorite sport?: uhhhhh.h does eating count

Are you a pastel, neon, or neutral color mlm?: none of those i like muted colors and dark neutrals

Do you wear makeup?: sometimes? i dont know much abt makeup honestly all i do is mascara and a little bit of eyeshadow but i like it when my boyfriend does my makeup because he makes me look pretty :)

Do you like boys taller or shorter than you?: originally i preferred a guy as tall as me (im like really fucking short so i didnt really like taller people because like i dont like feeling small) but my boyfriend is like 9 inches taller than me and honestly i dont care because he doesnt make fun of me for my height ^_^

Do you prefer hand kisses, or nose kisses?: BOTH AND ALSO FOREHEAD KISSES THEURE SO FREAKING CUTE

What’s your favorite cologne smell?: idk.... that one blue fancy cologne i used to wear and my boyfriend snatched it from me and keeps the bottle so he can buy another bottle for me because he used the rest of it..... i have no idea what the name of it is but it smells really nice

Ideal date?: i could go on i dont care what it is as long as its with him but ideally we'd go hang out in the field by his apartment with some snacks and then go back home and watch movies and then make bracelets together and whatnot

What’s more romantic: cabin getaway, or tropical vacation?: uhhh no to both of those i dont like any sort of getaways i dont like unfamiliar places

What’s your favorite mlm movie?: i mean. its not a movie and its not explicitly stated that theyre gay but. nbc hannibal.......

Do you believe in love at first sight?: YES ABSOLUTELY

Have you ever been in love?: YES AND I STILL AM AND I WILL BE FOREVER

Do you like sitting in a boys lap, or do you prefer when a boy sits in yours?: neither because for one i feel like im crushing him if i sit in his lap and also at the same time im bony as hell so i dont wanna be uncomfortable if he sits in my lap so we just cuddle laying down

Metal or cloth bracelets?: uhhh..,. cloth but i make mine out of beads :3

What’s one of your favorite memories of being in love?: EVERYTHING HELLO but when we first met it was so cute :(

Do you tilt your head to the left or right when you kiss?: i dont pay attention enough to know

Would you like to take his last name when you marry?: FUCK no my last name will NOT be dawkins thats embarrassing :sob: we both mutually agreed that he'd take my last name he was like "yeah i dont blame you its ugly as hell"

Do you want kids?: cat children........and if he comes around to the idea maybe we could adopt an actual kid someday

Do you interlock fingers when you hold hands?: yes ABSOLUTELY

What’s a compliment you’d love to receive from a boy?: he always tells me random shit that absolutely kills me like he said my nose was the perfect shape one time like hello??? sir that is so random but also thank you?????? and he compliments my eyes a lot and bhsghfd.gs

What’s better, waking up to him in the morning, or falling asleep next to him at night?: falling asleep w him because i know his lazy ass will not wake up until like 1 pm if its morning

Any turn offs?: i am NOT answering that

What makes you blush?: i do not know how to answer this like. hello normal human things?

Coffee shop or dog park date?: field...

Big spoon or little spoon?: I WANNA BE BIG SPOON SO BAD BUT IM ALWAYS LITTLE SPOON BECAUSE IM SHORTER AUGH

What first catches your eye?: his eyes bbecause hes so prety

Would you enjoy it if he bought you flowers?: not a whole boquet because what the fuck would i do with that but if it was one flower id be like aw :( thank you :(:(

Do you think matching couple outfits are cute or cheesy?: honestly i fw those one time we matched pjs and it was some orange shirt and garfield pants i got him for christmas 4 him and then i wore some blue or white shirt and then blue star pants that he let me keep :3 we were matching pete the cat and garfield

Have you ever asked a boy out?: i mean technically he asked me out but i guess yeah

Which is cuter, him being confident, or shy?: CONFIDENT I LOVE WHEN HES CONFIDENT IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY TO SEE HIM COMFORTABLE

What’s one of your fave love songs?: a LOT but like out of our 50000 songs i might be a little biased but i like the one i wrote for him :3

mlm asks!

I never see these so I decided to make one lol~

Do you like resting your head in a boys lap, or on his shoulder?

Sweaters or hoodies?

Netflix or clubbing on a Friday night?

Denim or leather jackets?

What’s your favorite thing about boys?

How do you like your tea?

How do you like your coffee?

Favorite fall color?

Can you drive?

Do you have a crush?

What’s your favorite sport?

Are you a pastel, neon, or neutral color mlm?

Do you wear makeup?

Do you like boys taller or shorter than you?

Do you prefer hand kisses, or nose kisses?

What’s your favorite cologne smell?

Ideal date?

What’s more romantic: cabin getaway, or tropical vacation?

What’s your favorite mlm movie?

Do you believe in love at first sight?

Have you ever been in love?

Do you like sitting in a boys lap, or do you prefer when a boy sits in yours?

Metal or cloth bracelets?

What’s one of your favorite memories of being in love?

Do you tilt your head to the left or right when you kiss?

Would you like to take his last name when you marry?

Do you want kids?

Do you interlock fingers when you hold hands?

What’s a compliment you’d love to receive from a boy?

What’s better, waking up to him in the morning, or falling asleep next to him at night?

Any turn offs?

What makes you blush?

Coffee shop or dog park date?

Big spoon or little spoon?

What first catches your eye?

Would you enjoy it if he bought you flowers?

Do you think matching couple outfits are cute or cheesy?

Have you ever asked a boy out?

Which is cuter, him being confident, or shy?

What’s one of your fave love songs?

[lawofangie]

some things i've manifested

these are some basic stories, but i have some "crazy" ones i might share if you guys want lol

note: before manifesting i used to have a pretty "normal" life. i was conventionally attractive, middle classs, etc. i didn't really "need" anything but a social life and better grades. regardless of that, i just manifested whatever i wanted and didn't limit myself. i also added a few little stories behind them.

appearance change:

changed my hair texture to curly

grew from 5'2 to 5'6

clear, even skin and skin tone (tbh i already had a really good skincare routine, my skin was super clear bc of that BUT my face used to be like 10 shades darker than the rest of my body and i had CRAZY backne and strawberry legs)

losing 30 pounds (i used to be 72kg, now i'm 58kg)

changed my shoe size (i used to be size 9 now i'm size 7)

changed my hand size (for reference, my hands used to be a little longer than my phone, i had a "pro max" sized phone.)

social life:

having good friends in my state (im from up north and was completely lonely in the state i live in now)

popularity (i used to be pretty irrelevant but now everybody likes me and wants to be around me)

getting my sp's (i manifested them from scratch and took inspired action to meet them)

having people crush on me more overtly/ getting approached more (this is kind of a weird one, before my appearance change i was pretty attractive like maybe a 7/10, but i got tired of people just ogling me and not approaching me. i only had the unattractive and overconfident guys approaching me, all the attractive ones just stared lol)

just being likable lol (people used to feel threatened by me or feel like i was standoffish for some reason. idrk tbh but it was VERY annoying. i literally used to get accused of "acting like i own the place" for being quiet and just existing 💀. i didn't really care what they thought, but i hated when they complained about it and tried to make it my problem.)

school:

higher gpa (i used to have a 3.0 but i manifested a 3.8, which is a weighted 4.0)

high grades (i used to fail many tests/exams and have a mix of a, b, and c's. now they're all a's)

dream college acceptance

teachers liking me (they actually used to hate my guts it was so annoying 😭)

school crushes liking me back (tbh they probably thought i was already attractive but they never spoke to me or seemed like they wanted to get to know me)

leaving early (my school day ends at like 12 now)

lifestyle:

living closer to the city

having my dream routine (i have my dream skincare products, haircare products, diet, and health routines.)

having a high self concept (tbh i technically always did, i knew what i wanted and deserved. i just felt more like i was being injusticed. so i got rid of the "unwilling victim" mentality. i also used to ruminate on irrelevant things, like mistakes i made, what people thought of me, etc.)

very high confidence (in my looks, abilities, judgement, etc.)

money for my parents and myself

having a busy, productive life (i used to hate school because my grades weren't contributing to anything i wanted to do in life, so i wanted a productive life outside of that.)

always getting my way

getting all sorts of things for free

and more!

i'd say this all took me around 2-3 months, not because manifesting takes time, but because i assumed a lot of things would take time. i also had periods of doubt in myself and tried to handle things in the 3d on my own for some time.. which obviously didn't work. still, all i did was assume and accept these things as true and they happened overnight, in a day, or within that week. the longest anything's taken me is like 7 days, and that was because i kept wavering in my mind. manifestation is truly instant.

but anyways, i hope this is motivational and helpful. i do have some pretty "ridiculous" stories like some revenge stories, "crazy" stories regarding sp's, some not very appropriate stories, really good things happening to me, and others.

thanks for reading! i hope this helps. 🩶

[thetarotbaddie111]

your future partner's personality (pick-a-card reading - detailed)

I II III

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(how to pick a card? observe the given image and choose the one which you feel the most drawn to. select the image based on the number provided below and scroll down to read about the pile you have chosen. remember, this is a general reading, so take what resonates!)

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۶ৎ pile I۶ৎ

what are their positive traits?

the first positive trait im getting here is that your future partner likes to plan things before carrying out an action. they are someone who thinks logically and they like to keep things in order. they are also very hard working and they like to take the difficult route instead of the easy way because they believe that there are a lot of lessons they can learn if they take the tough path. they are very good with decision making and also very calculated. they like to plan, organise and contemplate before taking an action and honestly this is a good quality because they avoid doing anything impulsively. they have a free spirit and i see that they like to travel or at least go out and roam around. they are very pure and they prefer doing things their own way, and majority of the time it works out for them.

what are their negative traits?

they are controlling and demanding. they like it when people obey them. they come off as someone who is very goal-oriented and hence they can be a workaholic or majority of the time they are focused on work instead of their personal life. they also might seem pretty happy but they are actually struggling with something. they seem to be putting on a very happy facade and an “i’ve got this attitude” but how they are actually feeling is a complete opposite of that. they seem like someone who is very focused on work (literally, ‘work’ here is such a strong word here because that's all they think about). their thoughts are filled with expanding their work or business and maybe this is why they are not very happy - maybe things are not going according to their plan. but here's the thing- they actually seem to be doing pretty well when it comes to their work. as in the outcome of their hard work is positive, but they’re dissatisfied with it. they are dissatisfied with themselves. it seems like they have very high expectations implied on themselves.

what would people say about them?

your future partner seems like someone who has a variety of options when it comes to work and this is because they have worked hard for it. like people know they have worked hard to be in the place they are now. they seem like they come from a fairly decent background but they do not take advantage of this privilege and they’ve actually worked on themselves and brought themselves on top of the ladder because of their dedication and hardwork. people will also say that your future partner hates, and by hates - i mean HATES procrastinating and they avoid sitting and slagging off in one place. they like to take action and move forward. they might have also ‘changed’. there has been some sort of transformation in their life and people will say that your future partner has changed for the better. but there also seems to be some sort of evident sadness that people can easily pick up on when it comes to your person. your person seems like they’re dissatisfied with their work (as mentioned before) and they put on a happy facade, but people notice that they are not happy. but they’re trying to work on this. people will also see them as someone who is very wealthy.

what are their fears and worries?

they like to keep a neutral stance and peace with people and they fear that this neutral ground will be broken. they do not like arguing with people. they avoid getting involved in any sort of conflict with people. they also fear that the world which they have built for themselves will be broken down because they have put in a lot of hard work and effort to be standing where they are right now. they also fear that they might not be in touch with their intuition. they seem like someone who is very intuitive and when they feel like they are not in touch with their intuition, they feel anxious. as mentioned in the start, they are someone who thinks a lot before taking an action and sometimes they fear that they might make an impulsive decision. they fear that if they make an impulsive decision, the bridge that they have built for themselves might shatter and crumble down. they also seem like they’re holding a ‘secret’, im not sure what it is but then they are scared that it might be revealed and it might ruin their image.

what is their inner conflict?

they feel like they are taking too much rest and they feel like they are losing themselves if they take out time for themselves (this is not healthy at all). they will always be thinking about work and they feel like if they take a day off for themselves - they might be missing out and falling behind.

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۶ৎ pile II۶ৎ

what are their positive traits?

they’re very curious in nature and they have a lot of creativity. they also treat people equally. they believe that everyone has the right to express themselves and they like it when people are open about their feelings to them or when people are open about things that bother them. they are someone who likes to focus on the future rather than being in the present, so they like to build things that will help them settle down in the future. they are also someone who likes to discover things. they like to try out new things and they have a very ‘sunshine’ energy - almost like a golden retriever energy. they might also like to travel a lot.

what are their negative traits?

they lack patience. they want things to come at hand. they want things to easily come to them without putting in much effort. they also seem like someone who might be ‘sneaky’ or someone who actually kind of tricks people into getting things done. they seem like they gaslight people into getting things done and they also think highly of themselves. even though they believe that everyone needs to be treated equally, this ‘theory’ of theirs does not apply when it regards them. they like to think highly of themselves and might be a little delusional.

what would people say about them?

people see them as someone who might be struggling financially. they seem like they talk over others - internally. what i mean by ‘internally’ here is that they do not like what other people tell them to do but will hear them out. for example, if someone tells them they need to sign a paper for something, they will do it (or sometimes they will not) - but they will bad mouth that person in their mind - because they do not like it when someone tells them what to do. they also seem like someone who is very argumentative and stubborn. they tend to get into frequent fights with people. majority of the time they seem to win but the parties that are affected seem to be at a greater loss here. they might feel bad towards the person but at the end of the day they are happy they won. people also find them very good-looking and they take this to their advantage. they let their looks do the talk, basically.

what are their fears and worries?

your future partner is very scared of change. they are comfortable in the ‘clothing’ or the position they are in right now. they fear that they might not live the life they desire. they are scared that the future will not be easy for them. they are scared of loss or losing things - it can be materialistic things or relationships (romantic or platonic). they are scared of abandonment and rejection as well.

i feel like the energy in pile two is all over the place. i had a difficult time understanding and conveying some messages. i was confused and tried to read the cards over and over again and even had to go back to the cards and look up their meanings. so after some time of trying to figure things out, i could come down to one conclusion.

your person believe that everyone needs to be treated equally and everyone needs to express themselves openly without any judgement. but at the same time when it comes to them, this theory is not valid. like when they are talking, they want to sound superior than others or they want to sound better than others and they might also dismiss other peoples feelings and opinions but then they preach that everyone should be treated equally and everyone should be treated nicely. however, they do not like it when someone tries to overpower them or look better than them because they want to look the ‘best’. (very insecure energy - please keep an eye out for this)

what is their inner conflict?

they are in a constant battle with themselves because they feel like they are not building the life they desire and they are iffy about the fact that they might not be able to make enough money or profit in the future that will help them lead a nice, easy life. their inner conflicts state that they have a fear of not being successful or financially independent in the future.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

۶ৎ pile III۶ৎ

what are their positive traits?

your future partner seems like a very lucky person. it actually looks like the universe is in their favour. their karma is good and they have a lot of opportunities. the universe is rewarding them for their good karma. they might be someone who is going through a spiritual awakening and they are trying to be in touch with their inner-self and this has helped them find their true self. wealth is not an issue for them - they seem pretty well off. i wouldn't be surprised if they are very giving. as in, they like to donate to charities or they like to take care of underprivileged children. they also think about long term goals. they like to have a very stable life and future, and they also seem like someone who would like to start a family of their own. they are also very protective and have good strength (maybe they work out regularly). they are good at handling situations and if there is some sort of conflict, they are the type of person who knows what to say and when to say things so that it can calm everyone down. they are someone who stands their ground and knows that they are right. some people like to believe that they are right even though sometimes they will be wrong, but your future partner knows that they are right because they are an intelligent individual. they are someone who has graduated from one of the best universities because the intelligence which they possess is actually very impressive (or maybe it could be shaped by experience).

what are their negative traits?

your future partner might be impulsive. they are also very conflicting - as in like they don't like it or they feel threatened if someone challenges their abilities or their intelligence. they sometimes are blind to the opportunities in front of them. sometimes they do not fully believe that they deserve an opportunity because they constantly devalue themselves. as mentioned before in terms of their spiritual growth, they are spending too much time in this aspect. like the universe has given them the answer they want but they’re still spending time - trying to find their ‘inner-self’, which is actually wasting a lot of time for them. they feel like time is not doing justice to them.

what would people say about them?

people will perceive your future partner as someone who is secretive. people see them as loving, nurturing and someone who likes kids. people also view them as family oriented. probably your person would like to start a family of their own. people view them as someone who does not question their own capabilities. they might be someone who makes impulsive decisions and they might be a little fast moving - basically likes to get things done quickly. but their impulsive decisions does not seem like it would hurt them in a negative way. people view them as someone who is actually pretty innocent and pure and someone who also possesses a lot of intelligence.

what are their fears and worries?

they feel like the intelligence which they have will not persist for long because of AI (artificial intelligence - i don't know why im picking on that). as i said before, they have educated and built themselves to be in the position they are in right now but because of AI, they feel like their hard work is going to be a waste in the coming future.

what is their inner conflict?

they might be keeping their possessions or their knowledge very close to themselves (secretive) because they are scared of losing it. they are basically paranoid of what the future might hold for them.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

hi loves!! i hope this reading finds you in good health and i hope you are doing well. take care of yourself and i will see you in my next reading. thank you for being here<3

(note: tarot cards provide guidance and possible insights into what could happen based on current energies, thoughts, and actions. the cards can highlight potential paths or outcomes, but they do not predict the future in a fixed way. this is a general reading so take what resonates!)

[olderthannetfic]

Im neither a proshipper nor an anti at this current stage in life, but at one point i was an anti i guess? And I hate it say it, but looking back, I understand why. I don't think I actually gave a fuck about Harmful Fanfic or whatever, it was just a substitute for therapy that i couldn't get at the time (because "literally neurodivergent and a minor" or whatever, but like...actually literally neurodivergent and a minor LOL).

As weird as it sounds like, no one cared about my ACTUAL PAIN, and that made me feel EVEN MORE PAIN, so i took it out on ppl who shipped "abuse", or whatever.

It's so stupid now, as an adult who is mentally better than I was then, but as ridiculous as it was, seeing someone ship an "abusive" ship or a "queer erasing ship" (like a canonically gay character with someone of the other binary gender)...it felt eerily similar to the actual abuse I was facing and the stress that everyone was putting on me to find a boyfriend or ask why my (closeted lesbian) self didn't like any boys.

But it was so much easier to keyboard warrior about how people who ship Bad things are Bad people, than it was to fix any problems in my actual life because...well, the actual problems in my life COULDN'T be fixed. That isn't a learned helplessness thing, there was genuinely nothing I could've done. So pissing off Shippers was, like, a vessel for that, and it *felt* like I was getting to lash out at the same people who were ACTUALLY hurting me, even though that obviously is not the case. Funny thing is, it wasn't actual fandom discourse that made me switch sides, it was getting to learn more about youth liberation movements and stuff, because it was then that I recognized the actual structures that were making me hurt.

I think one silver lining is it's made me more compassionate an adult. While I don't have any defense for the antis who do actual horrendous stuff like doxxing or sending death/rape threats, etc, I do have a lot of defense for the ones who were like me and would just make posts talking about how Wrong it is to ship certain things. I know that not all antis are in the same place that I was once was, and some are just genuinely immature brats, but it's like. . . I get it, you know?

The cycle of abuse/bullying is weird and it's not often a 1:1 "I had an abusive parent so now i'll be an abusive parent", sometimes it's the chronically online stuff like I did. It's also why I'm careful-careful to not engage and to just block or, even try to have a mature discussion if I can, and if the person I'm talking to is just "a little bit annoying" rather than "actual bully doing/sending illegal stuff". A lot of them just want to be heard, I think, and it really makes me sad that this is the way they choose to be heard...but also i get it, because i was that.

--

Yup. We often discuss anti tendencies in this framework.

People want control over their environment when they have none. They want the world to make sense and for there to be simple rules they can follow to Never Mess Up. This is a very common reaction to trauma and also typical of brains that like order and neat boxes and a world full of justice and logic.

The trouble is that a critical mass of "I'm just pointing this out" type posts does tend to make all the other teens with an issue around moral scrupulosity implode. (And let's be real, plenty of the antis themselves are secretly into dark content and are trying to pray the gay kink away.)

I have some sympathy, but I'm still going to tell people they're sealioning when they are and tell them they're flat out wrong about how fantasies work, not sugar coat it because they're probably a delicate teen. There's no need to be excessively mean or treat people as irredeemable, but I also don't like how we talk endlessly about compassion for teen antis and not for teens targeted by antis. It's similar to how there are all those complaints like "Hey, I work hard to manage my mental illness, but all the support seems to go to people who are letting their issues rampage..."

[weirdgenetic-fuckup]

Idk if you do requests, but if you do,

You should write a Slash x Reader smut

Where reader is virgin, and Slash has a corruption kink

Im just gonna leave it at that. 🙏🏼

A/n: trying to get through all my slash requests bc APPARENTLY that’s all I’m good for 🙄 /j I love Slash ☺️

Warnings: smut, fingering (f receiving), corruption kink (I hope, I tried 🥹), if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!

No one thought he could do it, no one had ever imagined that Slash could date someone long enough to get married without sex, yet here he was.

You met between breaks in tour, it was late and he was high and starving. You were working at a pizza place down the road and helped him get back home after he lost his shoe and keys, although he was most heart broken over the loss of his pizza but that didn’t happen until after he ate it.

He was stupid and his state of mind was evidently altered, however, it only meant it was harder for him to hide how pretty he thought you were.

He came back to your place of work later that week, sober this time, and you actually got to talking which led to dating and moving in.

It happened quickly, only a few months between dating and engagement, which no one was surprised by given Slash and his lifestyle. Your family and friends were a bit shocked that you of all people ended up with him, but after seeing the way the guitarist no one could deny it.

Sure, no one questioned it when Slash announced his engagement soon after announcing his new relationship, but there was a reason.

“What the fuck does that mean?” He asked. You were in his bed, curled up against him while he played with your hair. His other hand had been slowly making its way lower and lower and you thought it was the time to tell him the truth.

“It means I’m waiting until marriage.” You explained. He paused for a moment, and he did try to convince you otherwise a few times, although he always stopped if he felt it was pushing you too far or if he thought you might say yes; you made up your mind years ago and he didn’t need that on his conscience, he loved you too much.

On top of that, he loved the idea of being your first, of being the one to take away your innocence. He wanted to marry you and have you forever, you were his and he was yours.

Which led to now, Slash planting kisses up your neck as you sat back against him. “Just relax, sweetheart, and let me know what feels good, alright?” His soft voice flowed into your ears.

You nodded and he got right to work, nipping at your sensitive skin while rubbing your sides, one hand moving down lower between your legs until he was rubbing your clit and slow circles. Your breath caught in your throat, a shiver running up your spine.

You just had to relax and melt into him turning your head to meet his lips, he didn’t pull away as you kissed him and his fingers moved faster.

His other hand moved down, pushing two fingers into you and making you gasp and moan into the kiss. He didn’t want to rush you so he just kept them there, focusing on your clit with the other hand but he could already feel your walls fluttering around his fingers.

“That’s it, that’s a good girl, just relax.” He said, not changing the pace of his fingers. “Just be a good girl and cum on my fingers for me.” Of course you listened, you couldn’t not cum with the praise that he muttered, filling your thoughts of him and his love for you.

He kissed your cheek as you came down from the high. “Feels good, doesn’t it?”

You nodded, eyes feeling heavy as you looked up at him. “This-this is how you feel when I…” You didn’t need to finish, he knew what you were talking about.

He chuckled and shrugged. “Kind of, feels better for you, guarantee it.” He mused.

“Do I not do a good job?” You asked, slight worry in your voice.

Slash was quick to shake his head. “No, nothing like that, no, just, like…” He sighed as he tried to think of a way to word it. “Biology..?” He said, unable to contain his laughter as he said it. “I swear I read somewhere it was better for women than it was for men.” You laughed at his explanation and moved off of his lap, laying down and nuzzling into your pillow.

Slash gave you time to recuperate, the last thing he wanted was to overstimulate you, he’d do that another time but for now he settled for flopping on top of you. “Jesus, you sound like those pig dog toys.”

“Did you just compare me to a pig and a dog toy in a single breath?” You demanded, voice coming out strained as you were being crushed under him. He really wasn’t that heavy and he wasn’t putting all his weight on you but it wasn’t easy breathing either. “And you still expect sex?”

Slash snorted at that, tucking his face into the crook of your neck. “I’m not expecting shit, I-I’m helping you sleep..?” You were married the night before and spent time travelling and sleeping on the way to your honeymoon, having woken up not long ago and feeling the need to consummate the marriage just as you’d always imagined. To a point, anyway.

He was stupid but it worked and you pushed back into him, moaning as you felt his hard cock against you. He slipped into you, drawing moans out of the both of you. He waited for you to adjust to him, his fingers had helped but it wasn’t the same. No, this was much, much better.

He began moving his hips, his thrusts quickly picking up speed until the room filled with the sound of skin on skin and your loud moans mixed with Slash’s low grunts and groans. “Fuck, listen to yourself, a virgin and already so fucking loud and needy for cock. My cock, sweetheart.”

“Yes! Yours, only yours!” You said, pulling your knees up. You were trying to get on your hands and knees, doggy style, but he put a hand on your back and kept your face mostly shoved into the pillow. Not that you mind, it just put him at that perfect angle where he repeatedly hit that spot that had you seeing stars.

“Oh, that’s a good girl, keep- fuck, keep saying that.” He said, giving your ass a quick smack. He was so pent up, he wasn’t trying to be rough with you but he couldn’t keep himself totally in control, not after all this time.

“Ngh! Fuck, fuck, fuck! Feels so good!” You whined, feeling that same knot from earlier building in your gut. Slash’s thrusts were quickly losing their rhythm as you squeezed him, sucking him in and bringing him closer to the edge as well.

He made sure you came, letting you rolled onto your stomach after he pulled out, hand going to his throbbing member so he could jerk himself off, hot strings of cum spurting onto your stomach before he flopped over beside you and pulled you to his side.

He gathered some of his cum on his fingers and brought them to your mouth, letting you lick them clean. “How’re you feeling, sweetheart?” He asked breathlessly.

“Tired.” You responded after a moment, nuzzling into him.

He chuckled and nodded. “Sleep then, we’ve got the whole month and then the rest of our lives.”

[sevs-corner]

Tf 141: Mafia AU!

Chapter 2: Jobless? More like Job-bless

A/N: Link to prev ch + mini epilogue of the chap (where it goes to another character’s pov aside from the reader :DD) :

Preface:

After the mess of a morning, you instantly got roped into the orderly chaos of the bakery. Under a contract (a list of chores really) you are now tied to the place Nonna and Nonno calls home.

Although, you soon come to learn that it is the home of other certain individuals as well.

With a groan, you wonder how many things are left on the chore list posted on the to-do board, pinned with all sorts of menus, post-it notes, old recipes, and photos of people you don’t really care to know or recognize; although, you were curious of who that one handsome man was.

Which you kept at the back of your mind to ask Nonna during your break later.

For now, you had to focus up and sort this damn mountain of trash.

You even got scolded by the trash guy for having mixed the recyclables and non-recyclables! You pouted, mumbling that it wasn’t your fault but the old couple who ran this place— yet all he did was wave you off, saying that he’d make an exception and come by tomorrow, ‘as long as the trash is sorted.’

To be honest, you’d rather sort him to the non-recyclables pile.

Rancid- the whole lot of it was! You couldn’t believe it got stocked up until the second floor of the building… but you kinda have to wonder if they threw it from below with an underhand throw or dropped from the room you were currently in.

The latter seems more plausible.

Until you saw Nonna, spin and accurately place another bag on top- winking at your gaping form, knees bent with your elbows resting on it exhaustion.

“Is that nasty sickness gone?” She asks, arms folded on her chest as she leans by the doorway.

“I think I got another type of nasty sickness,” you raised your arms and showed the dirty yellow rubber gloves and apron covered in grime.

She laughs and nods, “well better get to finishin’! Else, you wouldn’t make it to the lunchtime rush.”

“Is that part of the list too?” You asked, stunned, you were very sure that was on there until Nonna waved you in. Pointing at the pin board by the doorway.

You slightly let yourself, making sure none of the guck got in the place you just cleaned. Bending and craning your neck upward, you gasp at how the checklist just became double its size from before, a stapler at both ends of the first one connecting to the next.

You quickly turn your head, tone accusatory- “you added onto it!”

“There’s a lot to do,” she shrugs, “didn’t quite give you the full list.”

She points to the first saying how that was Nonno’s list while the next was made by her. You pouted, finding it unfair- knowing how it wouldn’t be completed in a day, actually more than a week no less!

“How am I supposed to help you guys tomorrow if I can’t find my place today?”

She hums, tapping her chin before snapping her fingers and roughly pinching your puffed out cheeks.

“You stay upstairs with us, of course!”

“WHAT?”

You reflexively scream reacted, falling to your dramatically as your hands catch your upper body before it fell into the door way face first.

“Not a bad deal, right dearie?”

“Rightly so, dear wifey!”

You could hear the old couple tease you (with the old man coming in to see what the racket was that disturbed him from his cooking routine, only to see his wife amusing herself once more with the new kid she “adopted” (nonna’s words not his)) making you feel even more depressed, wondering what made you think it was a good idea in the first place to sign up to this deal.

You wanted info- and they needed a helper. The end.

You should have read the Terms and Conditions really. (The non existent one aka, reading between the lines and the vibe of the couple.)

Alas, you accepted your fate, resigning to it really as you stood up, looking at the list before retuning to the trash area, where the old couples kisses and giggles were still echoing by the back door way. A reality slapping reminder of what you needed to get back to immediately.

Kneeling by the pile you left, you spot a cat- a strangely pristine white one with bright blue eyes. It looked a bit fancy to be wandering around this part so you checked its neck for a collar yet there was none.

Humming to yourself, you called to it softly as you removed your stickily sweat gloves.

The cat, as if heeding your call, comes closers to your whispers of encouragement and ultimately sits before you meowing and nudging its head towards you.

“Aww!” You gleamed, immediately petting it with your finger tips, but melt even more as it long and fluffy tail wrapped around your fingers- as if urging you to continue your pampering.

“You’re such a cutie! Aren’t ‘cha?” You continue cooing at it, and with how immediately comfortably attached the cat was with you- you decided to try and carry it by opening your arms.

The cat crawls pause, sensing your pets has stopped and stares at you.

You stare it back.

Like a lightbulb popping up, the cat meows and stand up, crawling closer and…

“Now who the hell is there?”

You and the cat screech, both jumping in the air.

Although the difference between the two of you was one landed on their ass while the other ran away.

Unceremoniously once again.

You heaved, looking at the man intimidatingly making himself known by the entrance of the alleyway to the back door of the bakery, smoke in hand while the other was on his side- a holster you assume as you see something gleam below the morning light.

You noticed that he wore a suit quite similar to the men you met last night. Although this time, it was dark navy blue in color with a heavy coat on top, and brown shoes that seemed quite shinier that the jewels he wore on his fingers.

As you picked apart his outfit, he came in closer, noticing how you shivered at his presence (you weren’t it was just cold and he surprised the beejeebus out of you.)

So he stopped a bit aways away, five feet apart to be safe of the unexpected accusation that might come along by strangers at the street side.

“Got any business with this place?”

“Huh?” You look up at him, finally looking at his- less irritated, more confused than anything- face. His slicked back blonde hair made his eye brow raise and forehead creases even more noticeable as he tossed to you his questionable stare.

“Oh, uh yeah- I do.”

He nods, “right.”

You deadpanned, with you not believing him and him not believing your words— you decided to start the conversation again by standing and introducing yourself.

“I’m Graves,” he does the same, and stuff his hands in his pocket, offering a nod and grin.

“Like…” you paused, “the tombstone?”

He deadpans this time and sighs, shaking his head.

“You... you can put it that way,” he waves his hand, “but what’s your business here anyway, shortstack?”

You grumble to yourself about his nickname but placed in the back burner for later, where you would also burn him- but that’s a plan in the making.

“Why do you need to know?” You reply, a bit apprehensive of his prying. It’s not like he lived here- as far as you know.

…Maybe he was going to hustle you for messing with his favorite smoking spot?!

“Oh!” You turn to him, making his mouth clamp shut. “This might have been your smoking spot right? My bad.”

You bowed your head in a slight bow when apologizing, “its just that the owners of the bakery told me to clean up here,” you pointed to the pile of dump on the trashcan, “but as you can see, its taking me some time.”

He laughs, finally connecting the dots in his head and figuring who you were.

“Those old hags giving you trouble?”

Suddenly his arm was on your shoulder, slinging you forward and into his space which made you slightly flinch away, half uncomfortable and the other half making you hope wouldn't dirty his- clearly expensive- suit then blame it on you and pay for cleaning or worse... replace it.

Yeah, you didn't want to think about that.

So, you shook your but deeply sigh anyways, "it's all good."

You didn't know why but you wanted to reassure the stranger. In hope of getting him off your case? Maybe so- but it was more likely that his suit quite stank from the smell of cigs and alcohol, but with the mix of his- high end- cologne- it was just a smell that spelled disaster for your senses.

"Really now?" Unconvinced he was again but at this point, why did you continue to care?

So you huffed, sliding out of his grasp- surprisingly easily- and went by the back door, arms crossed just like a certain someone had done moments ago.

"Really," you rolled your eyes, "but its up to you to believe it or not."

Graves' eyes sparkled, smirk widening as he sniffs out a challenge- a challenge to his authority.

He scoffs out an amused chuckle as he sees you stomp back into the bakery in a huff, clearly cutting short your interaction with him and the conversation.

A conversation he quite wanted to continue.

So he follows, interest now piqued, wondering if you were a new face in town or simply a fleeting face he'd forget in a momentary notice. Whatever it was, he wanted to know.

His gut feeling says he has to--

it hasn't proven him wrong after all.

Entering the warm bakery as compared the cold breeze the outside gave made you shiver, hoping your body would better quickly adapt to the temperature change.

Quickly hanging your apron, you called out to the two that you came back for the lunch rush, all the while washing your hands in the kitchen's sink.

Whistling a tune, you think back to the words of Nonna earlier, having said that you would have to stay here until you get the end of your bargain. At least, that was what you think she meant until the list is done and dealt with.

Your actions slow as you think of an alternative-- you could text your co-worker and ask them right now, but that was embarrassing to think of doing. They gave simple instructions of how to get at the place, yet you somehow got lost and stumbled upon so much more people than you think you would have before coming into this reputable city.

To be honest to yourself for a moment, you didn't want to admit it to them not because of embarrassment- but because of how you felt ashamed of yourself. You didn't like having yourself in this position, squandering away for any penny you can make, scraping by with each paycheck, and most of all, for being so stupid that you can't even repay the kindness your co-worker has shown you. It felt like a waste, that you weren't using it right now-- staying at their place and slowly making it up to them by paying back every single money they spent to pay for rent, utilities, and food that they provided.

So you resolved yourself, slapping your face with the washed hands to wake yourself up from the quite long (short) introspection of your situation right now.

You did owe Nonna and Nonno for staying here, but for the boss of Soup? No... Suds-? Anyways, you had to repay that guy's boss as well for the lodging last night.

Maybe you can rearrange the agreement with the couple to provide- at least- the minimum of minimum wages so you wouldn't be just free labor for their amusement.

Despite thinking that they really might need some help, looking around at the state of place.

"Seems like you washed your hands extra clean."

You hear a sip behind you, jumping once more as you naturally glared at the person that spooked you.

"Could you like," you waved your hands around trying to find words, "not spook me every time you appear-- are you the boogeyman incarnate or something?"

This man in front of you, as formal as he looks, just breaks into cackles.

Downright fits of laughter that continuously bubble out of him.

Wheezing and all that-- but you wait, staring at him strangely and for him to catch his breath.

After a couple minutes pass and he doesn't, even leaning against the doorway as he covers his face (which was bright red) in attempt to limit his giggles, you sigh and untangle your arms. Pushing yourself off the sink and moving him aside so you could start the lunch shift.

"Wa-wait!"

You hear the man wheeze out and in frustration, you grumble out a- "what?"

"I- I was only ask-asking about you earlier bec-because--"

"because he's la famiglia, cara!"

You turn to the sudden pop of Nonna at your side, looking at her in question, "what do you mean-?"

"He-!" She quickly slaps his back to cough out his remaining laughter, "is one of my sons!"

"Son?" you ask, head tilting as you think back to that photo on the board. You turn to the board, checking if you were right-- and it was as if fate checked mate you as your eyes locked onto the boy at the far right side of the one completed family picture (you assumed) which had a lot of members.

'Blonde and blue eyes...'

The man, who has just been a disaster a couple of minutes ago, had now regain his composure and grinned at you as if it didn't look like he was losing his balls earlier.

"That's why I was concerned shortcake," he wraps his arm around Nonna (who just snuggles into him), "'cause I'm her son."

'Oof. '

Well, now that you know that they were all their (adopted) children in that picture, you find yourself more at ease in Graves' presence as Nonna chats to him about what happened ever since you showed up, with him humming and commenting from time to time.

As they sat at the side, you continued to do your job, managing the register and the back of the house- sending orders in and plates out.

You did it so much that by the time another table came, you were in auto pilot, customer service mode.

"Hello and welcome! What can I get for y'all started with--"

"Well, aren't you worse for wear."

Hearing that out of place comment made you snap out of your stupor, finally taking in the faces before you.

"The guys from last night!" You gasp, "and Suds' boss!" you glanced at the man with a beard and you could see him smile and nod, reaffirming who he was.

"Yes, that's me-"

Yet he gets cut by the rounding laughter of the table, making you confused, muttered a small, "what?"

"Suds--" The kind man from the other night manages out before falling into another fit of wheezing.

"His name ain't Suds, darlin'," the guy with a rough, scratchy voice talks and you now see that he was wearing a skull mask on the upper part of his face, then a black clothe covering his lower half.

"It's not?"

The man in question groans out, "its Soap you nest-head!"

You clicked your tongue, "Now I'm less inclined to call you that, Suds."

Now even Price chuckles at this exchange, making 'Grickky' looking at him in shock.

"Did you sleep well?"

Price redirects the conversation and you turn to him with a smile and nod, "thank to you sir."

You politely bowed your head and told him how you were gonna pay him back for it, but he just shakes his head- telling that you "shouldn't worry your pretty lil' head over a lil' cash."

"But its not a little amount!" You protested and they looked at you in shock. Thinking that you would just accept it and be done with it.

"I know better than anyone how both kindness and money is precious, so I'll work to pay you back sir."

The determination flaming in your eyes makes them quite stunned at the moment before Price just chuckles, "do as you wish." He says in contentment of the moment, and he was quite satisfied from how you reacted- bubbling and smiling as if you weren't laying sick mere hours ago when they last saw you.

"Cara!"

You hear Nonna call for you and you pause, asking for the four to wait a moment while you walk to see what Nonna needed until you see her approaching in excitement.

"Nonna-?"

"Oh my gosh!" She squeals into your arms, "I can't believe you're meeting all my boys today!"

"Your...boys?"

You stare at her for a moment before redirecting it to the sheepish four who sat there.

Welp... now your proclamations sounds a little awkward...

There was no way she would let her own son pay for lodging at his parent's place.

Even though you've only known Nonna for a couple hours, you were quite sure. A conclusion which made you throw your head back in embarrassment once again.

"just how many sons do you have?!"

A/N: Long chapter for the 2nd one because I got inspired! And also for the warm reception and the attention my silly lil AU for Tf 141 is getting hehe so thank yall <33 Cheers to more chapters to come !!

[azlovesem]

I just bounce from this place to that i cant focus on shit. I cant be tsken snyehere but some useless loop i hate. Just like do many of us are stuck in. Ill just lut an end to it with a bullet. Mybtroops will not let her livenon thos earth Taylor. They ho after her snd her entire fucon family becausevthey durround her but they cannot protect her. Its just like that. I wantvto see her or we both gotta die. You do t live God you dont resprct me properly or know one fuckn thing about me. Ill tell you kne thing. Im gonna kill your fuckn friend you hot i bolved in this. Nah im certsin she likes me better positive of it. What if the Princess the real one tells you smarten up you americsn fuckn idiot. Not feeling like the big winner these days. I would have helped you guys for real. My people dont like you fo they stayed home. Forget abour powerless tv witches or bitches what have you. I helped her you know and dhe me not sny if you have sny power like she does. Fuck your tour moron that Lady you font even fuckn know but i fo is a thousand times more powerful then youll ever ne smericsn with dny amount if money. People in the eorld actually respect her and her eord. Nit just a bunch of punk ass bitch pop tarts. Who are illterate and stupud to match their ignorance. Bunch of weirdo fags. From merica. Fuckn twats. I best your fuckn asses bad you sint dhit youre nothing in a fight. You hot demolished in that rlection thats how smart you sll are. List by a fuxkn landslide thats what you know about anything on my earth. Nobidy will stop me ftom walking right up to her. I didnt contact her do she comes to me. I go to her its over on this earth gor her. Stop hiding shit from her. I sint goin on daxebook fucknthat goof nonce site. She comes to me mericans. Or ill fuck you right up before xmas so bad. If you didnt notice Taylor everyone innearth isvtruing to trll you you hot fucked up by the kid. Surrendering is your best option because hes the only one protecting you now. With me here no one fucks with snyone long before i start yhrowing bolts down. Im the best. There is no better.

Someday you'll turn your radio on I hope it takes you back to that place

[faithshouseofchaos]

Pampering— werewolf!Kimi raikkonen x fem!reader

Word count — 514

Fluff

@tallrock35 @kr7-i-know-what-im-doing @kimiracing07 @isurvived3-11andimproud @moss-on-tmblr @octavikravecell218 @badassturtle13

Y/N lay curled up on the couch, her face contorted in pain as another wave of cramps hit. She pressed her hands to her abdomen, trying to breathe through it, but the ache was merciless. Suddenly, she felt a gentle hand on her shoulder and looked up to see Kimi, his brows drawn together with concern.

“Hey,” he murmured, crouching beside her. “Rough day?”

She tried to nod, but the pain stole her breath. “Feels like my insides are being twisted,” she whispered, forcing a weak smile.

Kimi’s jaw tightened, and he ran his thumb gently across her cheek. “Hang on,” he said softly, slipping one arm beneath her knees and the other around her shoulders. Before she could protest, he lifted her, carrying her toward the bedroom with a determined look.

“Kimi, you don’t have to—”

“I know I don’t,” he interrupted gently, “but I want to.” He laid her down, carefully pulling the covers over her, and then brushed his fingers over her forehead. “I’ll be right back.”

A moment later, he returned with a hot water bottle, her favorite mug filled with chamomile tea, and a small plate of her favorite snacks. Setting the mug and snacks on the nightstand, he gently placed the hot water bottle on her stomach. “Better?” he asked, his eyes searching hers.

She nodded, smiling a little as the warmth seeped into her skin. “Yeah. Thank you, Kimi. I… I didn’t mean for you to go to all this trouble.”

Kimi gave her a soft smile, brushing a stray hair away from her face. “It’s no trouble. You deserve to be taken care of.” He slipped under the covers beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and pulling her close. “Now, just relax.”

She sighed, sinking into him, feeling the solid warmth of his chest against her cheek. His fingers began to trace slow, soothing circles on her back. As he pressed his palm over her abdomen, she felt a comforting warmth radiate from his touch, as if he were drawing the pain out of her with a power only he had.

The cramps slowly began to fade, and she let out a small sigh of relief. “Thank you… I don’t know how you’re doing it, but it’s working,” she murmured, looking up at him.

He smiled, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Werewolf perks,” he said, voice soft. “I can take a bit of your pain away.”

She wrapped her arms around him, resting her head against his shoulder. “You’re amazing, you know that?”

He chuckled, the sound low and comforting. “You deserve it all and more,” he whispered, rubbing her back in gentle circles. “Now, just let yourself rest. I’m right here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

As her eyelids grew heavy, she whispered, “I love you, Kimi.”

He tightened his hold on her, tucking her safely against his chest. “I love you, too,” he murmured, his breath warm against her hair. He held her close as she drifted off, keeping the pain at bay, watching over her with quiet, unwavering devotion.

[capitalisticveins]

Seeing as how you're doing headcanons again i'd like to request hcs of Gavin,Milo,Sam,Vincent,and Guy( btw here's a thought for ya Guy as Hermes dangerous has stuck in my head for the past couple hours send help) also your previous hc were also great!(you could say they were ruthless ha ha ha im sorry that was bad lol)

~ Deviant anon （⊃◕ω◕(´ω｀*⊂)

idk if you can tell but I really like Guy

also I wrote headcanons for some character recently so characters like Gavin, Sam, and Milo have them a lil short than Vincent and Guy since it takes a while to think about possible in-character hcs for them. Sorry :(

Lots of Headcanons #3

Gavin

Believe it or not, Gavin’s social media accounts are usually blank. Save for Instagram. He just has them to comment under the group’s posts.

Despite never reading a book, Freelancer has told him he’d do best in the writing industry.

He does not know how to hold a baby. If you give him a baby for any reason he’d hold it with both of his hands under its shoulders.

The worst he’s been scared was when he played a horror VR game, but he didn’t scream or anything he really just jolted and went “shit” and moved on. Freelancer was not amused.

He likes being the big spoon when he and FL cuddle because he gets to breathe in their scent, hold them, and remind himself that this is real, and not just a dream he’ll wake up from.

Milo

You can’t beat him in cup pong. Digitally or physically. You just can’t.

The only reason David is considered a better cook than Milo is because Milo uses a lot of seasoning and the pack is full of babies who can’t handle oregano or sazón.

Whenever the pack goes somewhere tropical he has to wear a shirt or Sweetheart will constantly attempt to latch onto his torso.

Milo and cats have always gone together like peanut butter and jelly. He had a cat toy when he was a toddler, his first cell phone had a stray cat as his wallpaper, he’d feed the stray cats around his home, etc. So when he learned that he and the people around him could turn into “dogs” (wolves but still) he was DEVASTATED. Got over it after a day tho.

He likes juice boxes.

Avid Apple Juice “tastes like piss” hater, although he also says mint ice cream tastes like toothpaste so take that as you will.

Sam

Sam fucking hates cowboys.

Sam had braces from the ages of 19-21 and the only upside he had to being a vampire when he first turned was that he didn’t need his retainer anymore.

Sam always reads manga wrong and no matter how many times anyone explains it he’ll read it from left to right and never understands what’s going on.

The closest Sam has gotten to riding a horse is when he flopped on top of Darlin’s back while they were shifted and they walked around his house like that…he’s never been on a horse.

Sam has a lot of existential crisises, compared to like Vincent or Porter.

If something's flying and he can't figure out if it's a plane, helicopter, animal, or any identifiable flying object, he just believes it's an Alien UFO and moves on.

Darlin' gave him a wheat head for Christmas once. He was not amused.

Vincent

Wanted to be a youtuber for a brief period in time in 2010.

Had a weird obsession with those traced anime characters dancing tiktoks in 2020, a little after meeting Lovely.

He canonically has multiple cars he likes showing off to Lovely, but he also nearly never uses them and it’s Lovely who showboats them and takes them on joyrides.

He didn’t believe William at first when he was first told he’s a vampire now and was the only one who survived The Surge incident, until they both saw his funeral take place and see his grave, which took place a long time after the accident because his parents refused to believe he was dead.

He had 3 tomodachis at once and they all constantly died because he forgot feeding them was a thing.

He commonly "regrets" asking William to make him unable to lie to Lovely because they like to ask him embarrassing questions on purpose and he can’t help but answer them, even though he could just stay quiet.

His favorite memory as a kid was roller skating with his parents on his 7th birthday. Even though he fell on his face, sprained his ankle, and had a loose tooth fall out. Still his favorite day.

Guy

GUY IS SO HERMES CODED UR RIGHT

Turned a fanfic he wrote as his college essay and got in just because of it.

Was very afraid of Honey when they first met, they kept staring at him like he was the scum of the Earth. They just wanted to talk to him about the Animal Crossing pin on his backpack.

Whenever his friends order from Max’s, and he turns out to be their delivery guy, they make fun of him so much (playfully) and give him a 10 dollar tip

He borrowed his friend’s motorcycle to impress Honey

Cried over Gnomeo and Juliet

Dressed up as the Thomas Jefferson Miku Binder drawing in 2023.

He almost gave himself a buzzcut once when he was drunk, he had to be held down because everyone knew he’d regret it so hard later, not matter how funny it’d be.

[howlingmod]

hello hello! I've never requested stuff before so i hope I'm doing this right lol, I'm wondering if i can request something tender and fluffy for follower sword x reader?

i just wanna hold that man in my arms bro, and your writing is just so peak

summary - follower sword x reader hcs. ur both phighters, uninetionally a little aut4aut coded woops

misc - thank you so much ! im glad you enjoy my writing .. smiles .. apologies if this is a little lackluster or inaccurate, this beast is weird. also yay first request !

-To say dating Sword can be a little unconventional is an understatement. More than once have people shot you a look once you told them who your partner is. Regardless, you wouldn't have it any other way and neither would Sword.

-Usually, people are confused as to how you guys got together in the first place. He's not exactly a social butterfly and he definitely comes off as threatening to most people, but there's no dramatic story to be found here, unfortunately. You just met him during a phight like most other people.

The match had been close, both teams were neck and neck for the point by now. It was a mad dash to get on the point or die trying, leaving more than a few people to try and make a run for it before falling to the other team the moment they were within a few feet. Every route lead to the same choking point, funneling everybody into a sea of flying bullets and swinging blades. Eventually, you noticed the crowd begin to thin as several people traded or finally picked someone on the other side off. If there was ever an opening, this was it. Stealing away from the corner you'd hidden in, you ran for the point, just barely dodging stray attacks before your feet touched the objective. The timer resumed in your teams favor, much to the other teams frantic irritation. A few of your teammates had bullied onto the objective just after you, helping fend off the incoming vigor of the enemy team in a last bid for the win, but it still wasn't enough. One got picked off, then another, and then another after that, then it was just you again. They'd gotten picks of their own and one had traded, but it still left you outnumbered. Given the exhaustion curling up your spine to lay heavy in your head and the dread of an inevitable loss hanging off your hands, you weren't winning this. Someone on the other team pushed towards you. You were slow on the uptake, pulling your gear just a few seconds too late through the fog of weariness. Practically in slow motion, you watched them reel back to swing, made to block it yourself, and a pale blade stick itself in the ground just between you two. With hands already raised, quickly identifing the blade's source, you instead made to cover your eyes before the flashing light could blind you. Where the once constant growl of battle had become ringing in your ears, there was silence. Peeking out behind your arms, there was nobody. It wouldn't last long, you knew that, but you finally felt as though you had a moment to breathe. Just a few seconds left. You could make out careful footsteps behind you, leaving you to whip your head around to the source. Instead of Shuriken or Scythe popping out to break the peace, you saw Sword. You hadn't seen too much of him that match, seemingly being focused on different areas (bitterly, you thought of asking him why he hadn't been helping you with the objective, but a better part of you decided against it.), but you were thanking the Heights he was on your team now. "Thanks for the help, you're a life saver," You hummed, smiling at him. He didn't return the gesture, hell, you aren't even sure he looked at you, given the lack of pupils. Faintly, you picked up some little grunt he made, a show of acknowledgement. That was enough for you. You turned back forwards, vaguely noting how he stopped next to you. Maybe he was tired too? You're sure he was focusing on trying to beat the other team into the ground for the match, so you wouldn't be surprised. The timer reached its peak, signalling your team's win. Neither of you made a sound, even as you picked up on your other teammates celebrating off in the distance. The air stayed peaceful, weight lifting off of you as you stood side-by-side. Nothing more needed to be said.

-Afterwards, you did your best to return the favor, though he rarely needed it. You would provide support in the ways you could, pointing a healer in his direction when he was in rough shape and picking off extra opponents if he was outnumbered. Where you'd expected to just help him out once or twice and consider the IOU paid off, he would return the aid right back. Without thinking about it, you two started to hover around eachother.

-He wasn't sure why he did it, just that, at some point, he began to think of you more than he needed to. It was good to know where your teammates were and what their status was, but he certainly didn't need to be worrying this much over an individual. Nevertheless, he would still check in on you, sending long glances your direction whenever you were nearby as a quick assesment of your condition.

-Even before matches you two would find eachother, sitting quietly as you two prepared for the upcoming phight. Sometimes, you would ramble to him as he listened wordlessly, only humming every now and then to let you know he was still paying attention (a habit he'd picked when his silence had lead you to trail off in the past).

-The first time you'd ever mentioned hanging out with him outside of a phight, he'd declined, if only out of unfamiliarity. He wasn't used to getting such direct, personal invites to be apart of other people's lives like that. It stuck in his head for a few days, the question of why you'd thought to pick him speficially rattling around in the back of his head.

-Eventually, he would be the one to invite you out. It wasn't anything special and, in all honesty, it was probably just to walk around. Nothing all that entertaining, but he didn't care about the activity as much as he did having more time to hear you talk.

-Likewise, the confession (after a long time of him sorting out his feelings, he still didn't totally understand how he felt once you two got together but he knew you were greatly important to him), was pretty mundane. You're probably the one to do it since he's not super familiar with the concept, at least not beyond a surface level understanding of what it looks like for other people. To you two, it's an intimate moment: you trust him enough to open yourself up to rejection and he cares about you enough to make clear he's interested in you as well. To others, it's a very blunt, robotic moment on his part contrasting to your obvious sentiment. Oh well.

-Anyhow, as for how you to interact once you get together, it's more of the same. A lot of the time, you two are just existing with one another. It would come off as uncaring if it weren't for him seeking you out just to be in your company, even if you're not interacting in any way. He just likes having you there, you make him feel whole in a strange way, something about your presence makes him feel like some wrong has been righted.

-He's a little nosy about your hobbies. If you're reading a book he wants you to tell him about it, if you're making something he wants to know how you're doing it, so on, so forth. He doesn't know why, he just likes to know everything he can about you. If we allow the more sentimental wording to fall, you're like a specimen he needs to learn about and put under a microscope, lovingly.

-His love language, other than time, is gifting things to you, actually. Most times it's odd trinkets he comes across that remind him of you, but its the thought that counts. He takes the utmost care for them to not get ruined before he can gift them to you and you can just barely notice him stand a little straighter when you happily take them. If you have a spot for all the things he's given you, he admires it with pride every time, blame it on bird instincts.

-He often just calls you by your name, he just doesn't think any nickname compares to your actual name. That's the title of the person he loves, what else could compare?

-It takes him a while to warm up to physical affection, so give him some time with that. Once he's settled into a relationship with you, he's a lot more open to any touch you give. He most enjoys whenever you lean on him, he enjoys being someone you can count on for support and comfort. On his part, he's a sucker for you holding his face in your hands, something about it just feels so tender. The way your hands cradle his head just feels so soothing.

-The first time he says 'I love you,' is a whisper, but don't let that fool you into thinking their meaning is any smaller. It's a total declaration of his heart to you, how could he not mean it when you're the light of his life?

[atrwriting]

epilogue – a jackson j. maybank story

hi everyone

****major obx season four spoilers ahead****do not even thinkkkk of pushing past this line if you have not seen the latest season

ok now that only season four viewers are here -- holy smokes. i will never recover. wtf. literally wtf. i had to write this because i needed closure. im hurting all over and i dont even know what to say. here is how i deal with the death of this very sweet boy who deserved so much fucking better

summary: jj meets his mother in the afterlife.

warnings: mentions of death, depression, loss of hope, anxiety, the afterlife

here's epilogue:

He didn’t realize it was supposed to feel like this. 

This… whatever this is. 

Fucking shit, he thought. He didn’t even know where he was.

The last thing he remembers is Kie.

There was an ache in his chest. 

A real ache. One he hasn’t felt since he was a kid. The type of ache that he felt when his – old? first? fake? – dad would kick him around. Busted lip and cheek, whatever he felt like should be on the menu that day. He realized then that he wished he would’ve been with Luke rather than Groff in his last few moments, because at least he could walk off whatever Luke had in store for him that day.

Groff, he scoffed in his head. 

The ache of missing Kie and his friends was beginning to mingle with his anger for Groff, his real dad.

It curdled in his chest – mixing with bile, blood, regret, guilt, shame, and anything else in his chest that would never get the chance to leave nor heal. It was grotesque and poisonous – spreading like sickness throughout his body – the only that reminded him that he was sentient.

Right, the present – where the fuck is he?

He whipped his head from side to side, like a scared animal in the forest. He had his legs spread shoulder width apart, defensive stance, and he had his elbows bent in front of him – he wouldn’t be bested twice, no – not after Groff, not after he already lost everything. 

This was different than when he was destroying the storefronts of that one street – he thought he had nothing to lose then, but he was wrong. So fucking wrong. He had never been so wrong before, and his friends had never been so right.

It was then that JJ Maybank realized that if he had just listened to Kie or any of his friends a little bit more… Maybe… Just maybe…

There was no “maybe.” Groff’s blade was the killing blow, but his recklessness had been the beginning of his own end. 

The end of his relationship.

The end of his friendships.

The end of any possibility of saving his business or home. 

The end of being a Godfather. 

The end of his own happiness. 

The end of any fucking chance he had in a world that never stopped to remind him that he was fucked from the beginning. 

All of that – and for what? For fucking what?

He died the exact way everyone said he would – because of his own stupidity.

That’s all folks, he thought. That’s the show. Most predictable fucking ending on this planet.

He felt the hot brew of emotion well from his chest rise into his throat, burning his esophagus like acid. It choked him. It beat his pain into his skin, blood, bones, organs, and psyche until it was the only thing he felt and knew. 

He didn’t have any fight left in him. He usually flipped off any fucker that would dare demand authority – but he was done. He had lost everything besides the pain that plagued him in life – and he thought that was the worst punishment of all. 

“…Jackson?” 

He looked up then. 

He realized he was surrounded by – well, he didn’t know. He just knew it was bright. Really fucking bright. He could hear wind somewhere – maybe flowing through trees, maybe making small boats sway in the waves, or maybe in the grass in the marshes. He really didn’t know – he couldn’t place anything. The sounds were familiar – he knew those sounds. His eyes were adjusting, blurred by tearsandpainandregretandshame and everything and anything in between. He knew those sounds – but not that voice.

However… he felt like he should.

“Mom?” he gushed, voice breaking. “L-Larissa?” 

“Hi, sweetheart,” a voice whispered. 

Her voice so sweet, like a flower petal. Soothing like getting out of a sticky situation that Pope yelled at him about prior. Warm like a beach day. It felt like everything he had been searching for and everything he couldn’t find all at once.

He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know how to feel. He didn’t know –

Tears. That’s what he could do. That was all he could do. 

“No, sweetheart –” warm hands were beginning to cup his cheeks, soft thumbs pushing away tears like they didn’t belong on his face. His cheeks were stinging hot with every emotion that welled within his chest, but the hands were a type of warmth that made him realize he was actually cold. So cold. Cold, lonely, and full of grief. 

He realized then what all of those asshole adults were talking about all of his life.

His anger was a mask. Something he hid behind, something he used as an excuse to be reckless and a nuisance. What he really felt… what his real identity was… was grief.

JJ Mayback was full of grief. 

He crumbled then – falling forward and wrapping his limbs around the woman – his mother – before him. 

“I’m sorry,” was all he could say, tears flowing down his cheeks and onto her sweet-smelling silk shirt. “I’m so fucking sorry –"

“Shhh, sweetheart,” she cooed. “Everything is okay now. I’m here.”

Sobs racked throughout his chest, attacking the inside of his throat. His voice grew hoarse, unable to keep up with every emotion that exploded out of him. He had pushed it down for so long. So, so long. He didn’t even know It existed, much less that he could feel it for himself. He thought when people described this feeling they were lying or being fucking dramatic. They had to be lying. How could they be telling the truth about this? How could they live with this How could they fucking get through this without fucking killing someone or themselves?! Only kooks had the luxury of crying about their feelings or missing people who weren’t there anymore or expecting assholes to change when they had always proved they would never change. It hit him all at once. Over, and over, and over, and overandoverandoverandover. It hit him worse than anything Luke could’ve thrown at him, or any knife that Groff could’ve plunged into his stomach. Every tear… every fuckingtear…

He wanted to say either of his dads, fucking any of them – they didn’t deserve his tears. That’s what he would tell anyone that asked, and that’s what he would tell someone if this was happening to them.

But right now? Right fucking now? When he had lost everything? For real, no way of getting it back? No final card up his sleeve? No Pope to save him, or Kie to talk some sense to him? 

Right now… all he could do was sob. Fucking sob. 

“It hurts,” JJ cried. “It fucking hurts so bad.”

“I know, baby,” the woman wept. “I know. I’m so, so sorry…”

“I fucking hate him,” he spat into her shoulder. “I fucking hate them both…”

“I know…” she continued to weep, obviously overtaken with her son’s hurt. 

He didn’t know what to do with this. By all accounts, he was a fuck up. Parents, teachers, and, frankly, no adults liked him. If he wasn’t consumed by grief, he would’ve pushed her away – as this feeling was foreign to him. However, even if he wanted to, he couldn’t – her grip around him was too tight and her embrace felt too warm.

“I can’t give you what you lost…” she spoke, wiping his tears as she pulled away to face him. “They will be here one day – your friends, and that sweet girl that I would love to meet – but hopefully not for a long time. I hope you can agree with me on that, sweetheart. Until then – there are so many people that want to meet you.” 

He laughed then – almost akin to a scoff. “Bunch of people I don’t know? Bunch of people that would probably look down on me?”

“No, son –” she insisted. “Don’t speak like that ever. Not about yourself – not about the thing I am most proud of for creating. Do you understand?”

For whatever reason – he nodded then, but he unable to meet her eyes. He didn’t believe her – but how could he? Who had ever wanted to meet him? He would’ve scoffed at her, told her to fuck off like the rest of the people in his life – but he didn’t have the energy. Plus, something was different about her. Her face. Her voice. The look in her eyes when she was actually insulted when he had spoke down about himself. He couldn’t help but stare at her then, wondering why she felt differently about him compared to the rest of the people in his life who were supposed to protect him, love him, care for him – but didn’t. Would she be different? Could he trust her? 

He stare at the rest of her face then. Soft, fair skin. Blue eyes. Blonde hair. Skin that never had time to wrinkle. Hair that never had time to gray. Bones that never had time to get old. However, the one thing she couldn’t shake, and bothered JJ immediately… was the look in her eye. Pain. Hurt. Grief. Shame. Guilt. All mingling into one. All twisting and turning like the snakes in the garden that hurt them both. JJ knew that look. It was the same look he saw in the mirror, and the same feeling he felt in his chest.

He knew what type of person she was then. 

Her life was taken from her… just like his was taken from him. 

“I understand,” he spoke, voice breaking. 

“I know you do,” she spoke, and the allusion was not lost on him. It didn’t have to be specified – JJ was not quick in life, as he could rely on Pope for that, but in death and purgatory or heaven or hell or wherever the fuck they were – he guessed he was. “Take us for a boat ride, son – and we’ll go home.” 

He would never go home – at least not to the one that actually felt like home, the one he yearned for. He didn’t even know what his mother meant – much less wherever the fuck it was. 

“I know you have doubts – and that it’s hard for you to trust –” she began, voice breaking as she fit her fingers in between his. “–but I’ve been hurt, too – by the same people that hurt you. Can you trust me? Just once?”

After all he had been through – he didn’t know how he had the strength to even lift his gaze to reach hers. Her eyes were glassy and red, almost raw. He didn’t like the look of it. He found himself wanting to wipe it way with a towel – anything to get it to go away. The same raw look in his eyes was the same raw ache in his chest, and he knew that she had felt the same way. They were mother and son, bound by the same curses and people that trapped them in death. The hurt those people inflicted – it opened and hurt – festering like an infected wound – demanding to be felt, and demanding to spread, demanding to infect everything in its fucking path and leave no survivors. There was no fight left in him, nor his mother. He didn’t have the energy to keep up his walls. His defenses. The things that kept him alive for so long in a world that wanted to crush him. He needed safety. He needed salvation. He needed a place to rest his head because for once in his fucking life he could admit that he wasn’t strong enough to even turn his nose up at the thing that only wanted to kick him down and keep him there. He needed… he needed… he needed –

“Just this once,” he spoke, squeezing her fingers back.

She led the way, and JJ Maybank embarked on his last ever adventure: getting to know the woman that had waited his whole life to meet and love him. 

And he couldn’t wait to tell his friends when he saw them next. 

---

love you guys lmk what you think xoxox

[impactrueno]

I saw your twt about holding back on telling stories with serious and deep tones and it reminded me of an issue I had a while back. Im a south park fan and I loved reading deep analysis of the characters. and south park being south park, people dont take it seriously and think its just funny so it doesnt deserve deep analysis like other forms of media. I always came across comments saying "its not that deep" or "doing all of that for south park" and I used to hate that so much because why are you commenting that under the authors post? In media there is like a "spectrum" of how deep you are in it as a fan, and it doesn't make you less of a fan if you like to binge watch the show when you feel like it because its funny. Someone who makes fan fiction and psychoanalyses the characters doesnt make them a better fan than you. I hate "it's not deep" because it is that deep to me, I enjoy it, but it dismisses critical thinking and discourages deep discussions about our interests. I want to learn more about the turning point for eric cartman and the friendship dynamics between the main 4. I want to read psychoanalysis of the characters and understand why they do the things they do. I loved reading fan fics with an author that understood how the characters work and put them in situations while making it believable. Whether the content was deep and serious or lighthearted and silly. I don't see those as cringe at all. What I see as cringe is trying to downplay someones time and effort. you dont care for it. cool, just dont make it our problem.

I believe in recent years, this cringe and its not that deep mentality is linked to media literacy/reading comprehension issues. On top of the fact, that fandoms right now has been "normalized", so alot of mean and rude kids and adults are in this space not having a mature and respectful conversation and discussions, as well as zero fandom etiquette. (I understand the past wasnt this magical respectful place but this behaviour has increased compared to past years).

Please don't worry about making deep content, its super fun and there will be fans of what you write/draw that will definitely be into it.

GOSH anon you are absolutely right. cringe culture has done some serious damage to people's creativity and freedom of expression. doing things in earnest is now cringe to so many people (specifically that 18-21 age where they think they're better than everyone else and everything is cringe to them, image is everything) and they actually give you shit for it?? it's crazy. the most harmless thing in the world. whenever my hey arnold comics would leave my target audience on instagram i would get the meanest comments for no fucking reason, because i was taking hey arnold "seriously" (nevermind that hey arnold is probably the nicktoon with the most emotional depth and moments besides ginger but i digress) but hey at least i'm not the one losing my marbles over some random cartoon comic on the internet.

i think rudeness in general has been too normalized not just in fandom, but in social media in general. it's sad. the only thing you can do about it is be kind as much as you can to counterbalance it. i'd like to think that rubs off on people just like how being rude rubbed off on them.

i said that thing about holding back because i'm admittedly too hard on myself sometimes. no one is calling me cringe or making fun of me for what i do, thankfully, people have been super cool and supportive. and it means a lot to me because i'm very earnest about everything i create, even when i try to hold back. i literally cannot help being myself. it's all i know how to do. i'm just glad i was able to grow a platform where i'm free to be openly passionate about the things i like, talk about them and why i like them, the little things that i find fascinating, the emotions they make me feel, all of that shit is awesome and i wish more people did that.