#like idk if he's balanced poorly compared to the other two

[especiallyhaytham]

So I have the Mcfarlane Connor, Aveline, and Shay all hanging out on my bookshelf, and I don't know if my cat was climbing around or what. But this morning I come out to see that everyone else is fine, while Shay... has had an unfortunate time.

[nilboxes]

Updated with chapter 3 and 4

Really long personal ramblings regarding the writing of these two chapters below--

-

I basically did a lot of set up for these two chapters, hinting at a bunch of negative stuff the Buduga went through prior to Daidukul becoming khan. The idea about the necklace was something I came up with on the fly writing the backstory of Arkhai (Xaela Nil) and like, maybe trying to come up with some neat explanation of why Daidukul in game wears those.

I figure since it's been about sixty years since Arkhai died and became one of the Ruentides and he died when he was about late twenties, making it nearly a hundred years from that time to the Buduga tribe that Daidukul and the rest are in now.

I imagine the Buduga of Arkhai's time raided a lot, but also were more adept at taking care of whatever they raided for so their raids are less but more ferocious and more well planned, compared to Daidukul's time when I think they are less capable of taking care of their livestock because the khan before Daidukul was reckless and got the tribe their less than stellar reputation they have as canon.

I also had to infer a lot of Daidukul's personality and background since the writers in SE basically gave us nothing. Daidukul doesn't talk much except to spew facts at us (basically 0 personality) so I thought, idk, he looks like a happy-go-lucky kinda guy but that's just the surface. He probably liked Magnai from the get-go when they meet and I imagine he would not be exceptional to Magnai had he been just another Magnai Most Radiant Fanboy. Alongside some NPC talk I cannot currently locate, the Buduga tend to go for really prank-ish or really wild tactics, I imagine Daidukul has a bit of a jokester side of him. So, Daiduku—easy-going, level-headed, think first punch later kinda guy. A little bit of sarcastic humor. He is also not conceited about his abilities, so he can balance out Magnai, but I definitely think he can seriously throw down and likes to end the battle as fast as he could via limb breaking. I don't think he always necessarily fights fair either. I do strongly think he practices conjury, and is good at it, but he just prefers not to do it when there are others in the tribe who can do it a tad better. He likes to drink and can hold it well and gets himself bottles of foreign alcohol drinks if he comes by extra personal money.

From there I figure, he's a khan who leads with a gentler hand, but is not a pushover. He also values the input of others in his tribe, like elders and Hooshal, but isn't a pushover as to follow whatever he's told.

Funny bit about Hooshal I always thought he was such a debbie downer and wrote him like that lol but I got a little miffed this guy gets more personality than Daidukul's lines which was just "I like men" ya we get it SE.

Magnai is actually tough to write when he isn't putting on airs as I feel he is when he is shown in the game idk. I imagine him to have coped poorly with being put on a pedestal so young by the tribe's men from early childhood since the men heaped praises on him, while I think the women wrote him off because he's off to be one of the men.

So while Magnai doesn't lack for admiration and affirmation, I think he doesn't really get much real down to earth interactions, save maybe with Baatu but that man is to be married in this timeline and I hope to explore some more how sort of isolated Magnai feels to be so apart from everyone else because he is the oldest.

I brought Erdaa (his youngest older sister) in to kind of be able to explore how he'd be when someone who doesn't see him as a walking and breathing legend. I imagine to people he's comfortable with he's a bit of a grump, bratty, but ultimately has good intentions for those he cares about. The fact that he likes sweets is a headcanon of mine, idk, I think it's really funny if he was insecure about a really innocuous thing that doesn't fit in with the Oronir vision of their ideal man, which I think is some sort of ultimate warrior who eats his steak blue (not even rare lmao).

Now, getting the two main people in order, I had to go about writing the characters who support them, which comes to me more easily. I think of the ways in which supporting characters can do just that, support. Either they bring out something in the main characters, act as a foil or a parallel. I had a lot of fun writing and thinking about Erdaa, who I feel is hard on Magnai so he doesn't forget to pull his head out of his ass once in awhile. I bet she teased the hell out of Magnai after the gathering of the women and the 3 day fight with Sadu as told in the official short story and Magnai probably will think 3x before listening to his Oronir Brothers' wild suggestions lmao

For the next chapter, I think it'll be a focus on how well Daidukul and Magnai work together and possibly solidify a friendship. Nothing fast tracks that more than spilling a bunch of blood and stopping some Garleans I bet.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #383

“the big bully try to stick his finger in my chest  /  try to tell me, tell me he’s the best  /  i don’t really give a good goddamn ‘cuz i got my lunchbox & i’m armed real well”

Ever had a friend online for a long time without seeing a photo of them? Well yeah. Most of my friends are online, and while I've seen pictures of most at least once or twice, some I still haven't. The last time you threw up, what caused it? It was a side effect of a mood stabilizer I started. Any foods from other countries you would like to try but haven’t yet? I'm sure there's something, idk. Do you think the world would be more peaceful without any religion? Yes. Have you ever had a stalker? No. Does it hurt your feelings when people talk shit about things you love? It makes me self-conscious way more than anything. I start to obsess over whether or not the person things poorly or weirdly of me for liking what I like. I just feel judged for liking it, but that's my problem. Do you like it when people give you nicknames? I do, actually. It feels kinda affectionate to me. Do you often find yourself checking out people’s butts? Haha I'm not gonna say it's never happened, but it's not something I make a habit out of for sure. What fandoms are you in? MEERKAT MANOR IS BACK BAYBEEEE, Markiplier, Silent Hill, Shadow of the Colossus, World of Warcraft, Spyro, Wings of Fire, and lots more, honestly. I'm into a lot of stuff, and I don't love in moderation, haha. Are there any fandoms you used to be in, but left? Yeah, like Supernatural, Good Mythical Morning, or Warriors, but it wasn't out of "I don't like it anymore" or anything, I just drifted away. Anything the fans in your fandoms do that pisses you off? World of Warcraft if particular has one of the most toxic fucking fanbases. There are so many goddamn elitists and people who whine about "boohoo WoW is dying" and "omg this game has been trash since Wrath" and yada yada yada and it's annoying as hell. They always find some shit to complain about. Then Silent Hill... ugh. I think people just hop onto the "the series sux after 1-4" bandwagon to fit in with a certain crowd, but that's not the main thing that annoys me; rather, it's the fact the former main admin of the SH wiki made a fucking joke out of us there. He was clearly having personal issues and made a HUGE and utterly ridiculous deal of Silent Hill 4 having heavy symbolism to the main character being obsessed with the bullshit idea of him being circumcised, and it led to a maaaassive thread of us members trying to talk some damn sense into him as he abused his power. He was finally banned by the Wikia staff, but not in time for some gaming websites to publish "news" stories about it because it was just that ludicrous. Now, YEARS later, we still get trolls coming onto the site to try and revive the drama by inserting absolute rubbish into pages or making new ones. Nowadays I'm the main administrator there, and it's fucking embarrassing sometimes. I'm supposed to keep the wiki under control and respected, you know? Ugh, I'll stop. I could rant for a very long time about this. Do you prefer ruffly or regular potato chips? Ruffly. Do you write down your own recipes, or just commit them to memory? I don’t cook. What color do you want to dye your hair? My top three are pastel pink, lilac, and a light creamsicle orange. I REALLY want to dye it SOMETHING. :( How do you like your chicken? Of course breaded (like nuggets, tenders) is my favorite, but I also enjoy is broiled and seasoned well. There's other ways, but because I don't cook, I, uh... don't know how a lot are made lmao. Do you enjoy cheese fries? UUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHH YES. Do you eat refried beans? I absolutely hate beans, so no. What is a food you enjoy, but don’t have very often? A whole lot because a lot of it is from restaurants and we don't eat out all that much. As well, my diet is very narrow just because of how picky I am. Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn? Why? I mean, what are we comparing them for? I think Audrey is fucking gorgeous, though. Marilyn is also beautiful. Favorite fictional world? Uh, I dunno. Do you use lint rollers often? No. Do you carry pepper spray? No, but I want to. Has your power ever gone out for more than a day? I think so. Other than a dislike button, what’s something you wish Facebook had? Hm, I dunno. What time do your parents normally get home from work? Mom can't work right now, but I think Dad gets off around 5PM. Are you afraid to ask people out on dates? Yep. Do you think it’s better to look for love or let it find you? Both can work, but I definitely prefer to let it find me. I feel that *in general* that usually has better results. Have you ever found yourself worrying about commitment? No. I'm a very committed person romantically. Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already? No. Have you ever had a rash from poison ivy? I don't believe so, no. Do you have any chairs in your bedroom? No. Did you watch Elmo as a child? Some, yeah. Do you know anyone who doesn’t eat meat? I don't think so, off the top of my head. When you throw up, do you cry? No, but I'm a whiner and will also shake from fear because I have such a phobia of vomiting. Doing it totally turns me into a baby. Who was the last person to carry you? I couldn't tell you the last person to full-on carry me, but back when I tore a ligament in my foot, my mom kinda had me lifted when she would help me walk. Is it easy for you to accept loss? Absolutely not. I handle it very, very poorly. Have you done anything sneaky lately? No. Have you ever had a rolling back pack? Yes. Who knows you better than anyone else? My mom, probably. Would you ever want to go to Brazil? Sure, if the opportunity came up. Are there any medical conditions that run in your family? A lot, mostly heart problems. What band has the best guitar solos? Metallica imo. Who is the biggest jerk you've ever met? She was somehow my former best friend. Have you ever swerved off the road to avoid hitting an animal? I've never been in that situation, thankfully. What's a charity you would never donate to? I'm really not familiar enough with charities and their practices to know which ones are sketch or not. Have you ever grown your own herbs? No. Do you have any exes you'd consider dating again? Yes. What were some of your favorite classes you took in high school? Art and German. Mythology was fun, too. Do you know anyone with a profession in law? Yeah, I have a cousin that's a lawyer. Have you ever Googled yourself? Yeah, outta curiosity. What's the shortest amount of time you've had between relationships? Like, two days. Part of the reason I left Girt was because I liked Sara. As a child, what comfort foods did your parents make for you when you were sick with a cold or flu? Chicken noodle soup. What's a movie series where the sequel was better than the original? Ha, for some reason Inspector Gadget came to mind. I guess from mentioning my childhood. I was FUCKING OBSESSED with that movie as a kid. The first one's fine, but I love the second one. Does your car have heated seats? Mom's doesn't. What is the strangest pizza topping you've ever eaten? Nothing strange, really. Describe your hometown. What’s it like there? Small and dangerous. Lots of run-down areas. A gang nearly broke into our house once, if that helps you get the picture. What was the last video game you beat? I replayed Silent Hill 2 forever ago. What did you learn from your last failed relationship? It really just taught me that you need to take care of your own mental health before you can effectively handle another's properly and strike a healthy balance. What country does your favorite band hail from? Britain. What’s something on your to-do list that never actually gets done? Finish decorating my room. -_- Have you ever been really passionate about something but then lost interest? If so, what was it? Good Mythical Morning, I suppose. I used to be OB-SESSED. I still adore Rhett and Link as people, they are fucking wonderful human beings and excellent entertainers, I just drifted away from their content. I don't really know why. Do you sleep with the TV or the radio on? No. What’s the worst thing about being male/female (whichever you are)? Menstrual cycles, I'd say. It affects your mood so much, and as someone who's bipolar, it can be very confusing. I like to know why I'm feeling a certain way. What movie has the best special effects? /shrug How many work hours per week is too much for you? I wouldn't know, I've never really worked long enough to figure this out. Can you remember your first day of school? I think I have the faintest memory of it. I know I was very scared to leave my mom (I had absolutely awful separation anxiety from her) and I MIGHT have cried, but I don't really recall with certainty. Have you ever entered a modelling competition? Would you? No thanks. Did you keep any drawings/stories from when you were younger? Most, no, because the level of cringe is LITERALLY unbearable for me. Do you have a safe? Mom does somewhere. What’s the scariest thing to happen to you so far? The breakup. That night was just fucking terrifying. I was so certain my life was over, like the situation was so, so impossible in my head. What was your last dream about? (or your daydream if you don’t remember) My memory's faint, but I just remember I had a nightmare where a LOT of my bones were totally snapped in half. When was the last time you saw a relative? Excluding my immediate family, I last saw my now-departed grandmother and my uncle a while back at a hotel as they were passing through. Have you ever been in a TV audience? No. Are you in any way close to reaching a personal goal? Not really... Do you prefer crosswords or word searches? Word searches. Do you like making collages? Not really. Do you remember any inside jokes from childhood? No. What would you love to learn to do? Digital art, like drawing on a tablet. Do you prefer monkeys or lemurs? Lemurs. Do you watch movies based on the actors or the movie plot? The plot, 100%. Are you more shy in real life or on the internet? I am WAY more shy irl.

[antthonystark]

anyway things that were amazing about 2x11

VISUALLY what a lovely episode!!!! that awful green colour grading from 2a seems to be gone (or mostly gone) and yeah, the lighting is still dark, but i feel like they’ve finally struck the appropriate balance between season “looks like a commercial’ one and season “who the fuck even is in this scene?” 2a lol. like if you look at the rooftop scene from 2x05 compared to 2x11, it’s night and day. 

speaking of visual effects, did anyone else love love love the way the end part of the episode looked, when azazel was fuckin screaming into everyone’s ears or whatever? the pentagram and everything and then like the ash and i really liked the effect where azazel evaporated into bats or what fuckin ever

GOLDEN EYES JACE HOW COOL IS THIS plus basically that whole badass leap and sword thing whatever you wanna call it i just loved that whole thing it’s like this really really cool mythology coming to life and i really liked the aesthetic of it all with the glowing runes and eyes

azazel recognizing magnus was my favourite thing in the entire world tbh like ohhh man i really hope they go down this route when they’re exploring magnus’s backstory and the way alec in the background just kind of looks between them.....is there anything better than this 

starting from the top, i really love the institute courtyard set! i don’t think we’ve seen it before? but anyway it was really nice and it set a really cool atmosphere for both the demon summoning scene and the parabatai sparring scene and i really hope we see more of it 

and uhhh speaking of the parabatai sparring scene.... i mean.....is there anything better than this just tbh

like i said before i love the set and the atmosphere of it i thought it was super cool and it wasn’t even that poorly lit for being at night lol and the music was nice! i love the kind of electro techno what fuckin ever im too old for this stuff they play during the sparring scenes

and the fight choreography this season has been out!!!! of this!!! world!!!! personally i loved the sword/axe fighting they did but the hand to hand was just as fun and more cute and almost like play fighting between brothers and i just loved it 

the teasing!! the smiles!! just a really good lighthearted scene that didn’t feel extraneous either 

okay hate climon if you will but that scene was really pretty visually

the attempted hug between jace and simon had me in stitches dom and alberto are so perfect at their dynamic whether you ship it or not it’s fantastic 

im glad we’re seeing a more increased presence of the clave because it’s only appropriate and it rounds out the world better and is hopefully going to make certain things implied about the clave more explicit

plus......herondale reveal.......soon hopefully lol

ive seen that restaurant multiple times in person that azazel decimated and i think that’s a cool fun fact irrelevant to everyone but me 

I LOVED THE SCENE between alec and izzy....like i did not like the yin fen plot but it seems like we’re wrapping that up thank god...and it was just so damn sweet!!!! alec is so sweet and nurturing and caring isn’t he :)))))

oh lord that sweet sad little smile that they exchanged when he said “they all think you have the flu” kill me now that was perfect 

matt and em have such a damn perfect dynamic and chemistry it kills me every single time and em was also fantastic in all of the withdrawal scenes

when she’s trying to put her makeup on is especially touching and i think it’s as good a character moment for izzy as we’ve gotten recently and i really liked it 

motherfuckin luke alpha garroway that was so badass and i loved every damn second of it (plus idk about you but that “detective garroway” was nice)

luke being 100% done with ollie was hilarious and i loved it 

his excuse about taking notes on his phone was great too i just loved that whole scene tbh

loved the moments between simon and maia!! i’m so glad they’re not trying to put any unnecessary drama between them and just having them move on and stay friendly with each other!! 

magnus’s outfit basically saved my life so there’s that 

i want his coat and someone in that costume department deserves literal emmys

plus whenever magnus just....knows everything....all the time...... i love it

love the boyfriends working together!! solving problems!! helping each other out like real people do and i also really liked the aesthetic of the scene with that garbage can fire lighting it up....probably not gonna be fun as a gifmaker but it looked cool as hell (esp with that coat)

GOODBYE!!! UNECCESSARY!!! INCEST!!! ANGST!!! hello to a sweet and healthy relationship being allowed to form w/o unnecessary incest angst :)))

i actually loved the scene between the two of them right after, when clary is a little bit upset and tells jace to “feel something” i feel like it’s really indicative of the different ways they look at the world and themselves and yes i enjoyed it 

cute bonding moment between luke and maia!!! im really glad that they’re acknowledging the problems while not ruining their relationship, because i love it a lot and it just really shows how much trust maia has in luke and vice versa

the scene........with.............jace and alec on the rooftop..........is there anything better than this......i just love how it was completely wordless and yet you understood the emotions perfectly and the little pat alec does on jace’s head fuck me up man

more scenes like this please where emotions aren’t thrown in our face through over-expressive dialogue and the actors are allowed to act because holy shit it was perfect

speaking of which, SUBTLETY!! with ollie being potentially ??? who knows with that pic she took of luke and maia, plus the tiny little hints (i mean we all know who he is but if we didn’t) about sebastian (also kudos to will tudor for a fantastic first episode!!) like the way he talks about jocelyn which is some pretty sick dramatic irony for us at this point, and the weird hand burn thing he was doing......i really liked it and i think will is gonna be amazing and i’m excited to see what’s next

like it’s not punching us in the face with information and i really appreciate that 

alec and izzy’s phone call!!! it’s so cute and im so glad they’re handling their conflicts in character because they just care and love each other so so so so so much and you can see that so clearly and i love it 

though im not a fan of the trope in this context, i cannot fucking wait to see harry shum fuckin jr killing the game next episode because he will and it will be phenomenal tbqh

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #382

“’cuz if i stand up, i’ll break my bones, and everybody loves to see a fall unfold”

Ever had a friend online for a long time without seeing a photo of them? Well yeah. Most of my friends are online, and while I've seen pictures of most at least once or twice, some I still haven't. The last time you threw up, what caused it? It was a side effect of a mood stabilizer I started. Any foods from other countries you would like to try but haven’t yet? I'm sure there's something, idk. Do you think the world would be more peaceful without any religion? Yes. Have you ever had a stalker? No. Does it hurt your feelings when people talk shit about things you love? It makes me self-conscious way more than anything. I start to obsess over whether or not the person things poorly or weirdly of me for liking what I like. I just feel judged for liking it, but that's my problem. Do you like it when people give you nicknames? I do, actually. It feels kinda affectionate to me. Do you often find yourself checking out people’s butts? Haha I'm not gonna say it's never happened, but it's not something I make a habit out of for sure. What fandoms are you in? MEERKAT MANOR IS BACK BAYBEEEE, Markiplier, Silent Hill, Shadow of the Colossus, World of Warcraft, Spyro, Wings of Fire, and lots more, honestly. I'm into a lot of stuff, and I don't love in moderation, haha. Are there any fandoms you used to be in, but left? Yeah, like Supernatural, Good Mythical Morning, or Warriors, but it wasn't out of "I don't like it anymore" or anything, I just drifted away. Anything the fans in your fandoms do that pisses you off? World of Warcraft if particular has one of the most toxic fucking fanbases. There are so many goddamn elitists and people who whine about "boohoo WoW is dying" and "omg this game has been trash since Wrath" and yada yada yada and it's annoying as hell. They always find some shit to complain about. Then Silent Hill... ugh. I think people just hop onto the "the series sux after 1-4" bandwagon to fit in with a certain crowd, but that's not the main thing that annoys me; rather, it's the fact the former main admin of the SH wiki made a fucking joke out of us there. He was clearly having personal issues and made a HUGE and utterly ridiculous deal of Silent Hill 4 having heavy symbolism to the main character being obsessed with the bullshit idea of him being circumcised, and it led to a maaaassive thread of us members trying to talk some damn sense into him as he abused his power. He was finally banned by the Wikia staff, but not in time for some gaming websites to publish "news" stories about it because it was just that ludicrous. Now, YEARS later, we still get trolls coming onto the site to try and revive the drama by inserting absolute rubbish into pages or making new ones. Nowadays I'm the main administrator there, and it's fucking embarrassing sometimes. I'm supposed to keep the wiki under control and respected, you know? Ugh, I'll stop. I could rant for a very long time about this. Do you prefer ruffly or regular potato chips? Ruffly. Do you write down your own recipes, or just commit them to memory? I don’t cook. What color do you want to dye your hair? My top three are pastel pink, lilac, and a light creamsicle orange. I REALLY want to dye it SOMETHING. :( How do you like your chicken? Of course breaded (like nuggets, tenders) is my favorite, but I also enjoy is broiled and seasoned well. There's other ways, but because I don't cook, I, uh... don't know how a lot are made lmao. Do you enjoy cheese fries? UUUUUUUGGGGGGHHHHH YES. Do you eat refried beans? I absolutely hate beans, so no. What is a food you enjoy, but don’t have very often? A whole lot because a lot of it is from restaurants and we don't eat out all that much. As well, my diet is very narrow just because of how picky I am. Marilyn Monroe or Audrey Hepburn? Why? I mean, what are we comparing them for? I think Audrey is fucking gorgeous, though. Marilyn is also beautiful. Favorite fictional world? Uh, I dunno. Do you use lint rollers often? No. Do you carry pepper spray? No, but I want to. Has your power ever gone out for more than a day? I think so. Other than a dislike button, what’s something you wish Facebook had? Hm, I dunno. What time do your parents normally get home from work? Mom can't work right now, but I think Dad gets off around 5PM. Are you afraid to ask people out on dates? Yep. Do you think it’s better to look for love or let it find you? Both can work, but I definitely prefer to let it find me. I feel that *in general* that usually has better results. Have you ever found yourself worrying about commitment? No. I'm a very committed person romantically. Would you get involved with someone if they had a child already? No. Have you ever had a rash from poison ivy? I don't believe so, no. Do you have any chairs in your bedroom? No. Did you watch Elmo as a child? Some, yeah. Do you know anyone who doesn’t eat meat? I don't think so, off the top of my head. When you throw up, do you cry? No, but I'm a whiner and will also shake from fear because I have such a phobia of vomiting. Doing it totally turns me into a baby. Who was the last person to carry you? I couldn't tell you the last person to full-on carry me, but back when I tore a ligament in my foot, my mom kinda had me lifted when she would help me walk. Is it easy for you to accept loss? Absolutely not. I handle it very, very poorly. Have you done anything sneaky lately? No. Have you ever had a rolling back pack? Yes. Who knows you better than anyone else? My mom, probably. Would you ever want to go to Brazil? Sure, if the opportunity came up. Are there any medical conditions that run in your family? A lot, mostly heart problems. What band has the best guitar solos? Metallica imo. Who is the biggest jerk you've ever met? She was somehow my former best friend. Have you ever swerved off the road to avoid hitting an animal? I've never been in that situation, thankfully. What's a charity you would never donate to? I'm really not familiar enough with charities and their practices to know which ones are sketch or not. Have you ever grown your own herbs? No. Do you have any exes you'd consider dating again? Yes. What were some of your favorite classes you took in high school? Art and German. Mythology was fun, too. Do you know anyone with a profession in law? Yeah, I have a cousin that's a lawyer. Have you ever Googled yourself? Yeah, outta curiosity. What's the shortest amount of time you've had between relationships? Like, two days. Part of the reason I left Girt was because I liked Sara. As a child, what comfort foods did your parents make for you when you were sick with a cold or flu? Chicken noodle soup. What's a movie series where the sequel was better than the original? Ha, for some reason Inspector Gadget came to mind. I guess from mentioning my childhood. I was FUCKING OBSESSED with that movie as a kid. The first one's fine, but I love the second one. Does your car have heated seats? Mom's doesn't. What is the strangest pizza topping you've ever eaten? Nothing strange, really. Describe your hometown. What’s it like there? Small and dangerous. Lots of run-down areas. A gang nearly broke into our house once, if that helps you get the picture. What was the last video game you beat? I replayed Silent Hill 2 forever ago. What did you learn from your last failed relationship? It really just taught me that you need to take care of your own mental health before you can effectively handle another's properly and strike a healthy balance. What country does your favorite band hail from? Britain. What’s something on your to-do list that never actually gets done? Finish decorating my room. -_- Have you ever been really passionate about something but then lost interest? If so, what was it? Good Mythical Morning, I suppose. I used to be OB-SESSED. I still adore Rhett and Link as people, they are fucking wonderful human beings and excellent entertainers, I just drifted away from their content. I don't really know why. Do you sleep with the TV or the radio on? No. What’s the worst thing about being male/female (whichever you are)? Menstrual cycles, I'd say. It affects your mood so much, and as someone who's bipolar, it can be very confusing. I like to know why I'm feeling a certain way. What movie has the best special effects? /shrug How many work hours per week is too much for you? I wouldn't know, I've never really worked long enough to figure this out. Can you remember your first day of school? I think I have the faintest memory of it. I know I was very scared to leave my mom (I had absolutely awful separation anxiety from her) and I MIGHT have cried, but I don't really recall with certainty. Have you ever entered a modelling competition? Would you? No thanks. Did you keep any drawings/stories from when you were younger? Most, no, because the level of cringe is LITERALLY unbearable for me. Do you have a safe? Mom does somewhere. What’s the scariest thing to happen to you so far? The breakup. That night was just fucking terrifying. I was so certain my life was over, like the situation was so, so impossible in my head. What was your last dream about? (or your daydream if you don’t remember) My memory's faint, but I just remember I had a nightmare where a LOT of my bones were totally snapped in half. When was the last time you saw a relative? Excluding my immediate family, I last saw my now-departed grandmother and my uncle a while back at a hotel as they were passing through. Have you ever been in a TV audience? No. Are you in any way close to reaching a personal goal? Not really... Do you prefer crosswords or word searches? Word searches. Do you like making collages? Not really. Do you remember any inside jokes from childhood? No. What would you love to learn to do? Digital art, like drawing on a tablet. Do you prefer monkeys or lemurs? Lemurs. Do you watch movies based on the actors or the movie plot? The plot, 100%. Are you more shy in real life or on the internet? I am WAY more shy irl.

[antthonystark]

can you talk about your fave alec moments from 2a?

Oh man. There’s so much, there’s basically too much – I didn’t actually think therewas that much, but wow there’s actually so much because literally every Alecscene is my favourite scene as I am a simple girl with easy standards. But I’ll try to, like, not talk for six thousand years. Let’ssee how it goes lmao.

#1 Best Top Alec Scene of All TimeEver: Alec v. Aldertree, 2x09

Oh man. Oh man. This was…this was such a gift…Ican’t even describe how I feel about it adequately. Like our boy is a saltineat the best of times, but that aspect is sort of is tempered by his forcedrespect for authority (which is a whole nother conversation which I’ve talkedabout a few times) – so against an authority figure, in the past, Alec has beensort of passive-aggressive (for lack of a better word); like in 1x09, he staresdown Lydia and hands the folder to his mom against her command, and in 2x01 hestill takes Lydia’s dismissal instead of contesting it. So I like this sceneespecially because you see him coming out of that, but it’s not OOC oranything, firstly because shedding his adherence to authority has been a partof his arc since 1x12 (and was reinforced in 2x08 with his conflicts with hismother), and also – and more significantly imo – it’s because of his family.Isabelle specifically. 

So that “I’ll do anything for my sister,” authoritative,salty as fuck Alec just taking his Institute back that thisscene brought out is my favourite ever Alec and I hope he’s here to stay.(Actually, I hope we see him struggle a bit more with his identity as aShadowhunter, his duty to the Clave and his parents and following orders andthe like, since that was a key part of his character in S1 and it would be socool to see him actually deal with that, but that’s a whole nother thing aswell). And leader!Alec has always been my favourite Alec, and there’s nothingmore I want to see than Alec being the head of the institute like he deservesto be (seeing a struggle for power between Alec/the Lightwoods/Aldertree wouldbe SO NICE too, and I’m actually really interested to see how power is going toshift hands in 2B in the Institute. Maybe seeing Alec have to navigate themessy quagmire of Shadowhunter/Clave politics which puts him at odds with theothers who don’t get how complicated it is because the consequences of any insubordinationare going to fall on his shoulders as the leader sorta like how it was in S1. And I’m also kind of interested to see how Alec navigates the whole “preserving the Lightwood honour” thing from last year - how much he values that now compared to the huge lengths he went to for the Lightwood name in the first season. That would be so cool).

Andhonestly, that smirk and that salty little pat on Aldertree’s shoulder ended mylife. It ended my life.

I just put the rest in chronological order but i just had to mention this one first lol so here we goooo

EPISODE 2x01 (and that punching bagscene in 1x02):

I’m justnaming this whole episode okay sorry (I’m probably gonna do this with mostepisodes lbr). There was just so muchgood Alec in this episode it’s hard to unpack it but let me try.

I’dprobably say my favourite moment overall is the very first one, with the wholegang in the institute. This is weird and most people would probably go for theAlec/Maryse confrontation or the Magnus/Alec scene later on, but there’s justsomething so Alec about this scenethat I love. Like, Matt did such a good job in this scene imo because you couldliterally feel the stress and panic radiating off of Alec and it just cut medeep because man oh man those parabatai feels always get me. More than that, though,you can see the fear and frustration because of the realization that the way hehas dealt with his feelings his whole life is starting to fail – in the wake ofJace’s absence, suddenly he isn’t able to bottle up his feelings and put themin a place out of his own access, so he doesn’t have to deal with them –suddenly, it’s too much to just shove out of sight and push down withoutexamining (as he tries to articulate it for the first time when he says “withJace missing, it’s like the ground has shifted and I can’t keep my balance—”). Andthroughout the first couple of episodes, you see him having to deal with thisand becoming more volatile as these feelings that he never learned how tohandle burst out of him without him being able to exert that control that he’sbeen having to do his whole life.

Relateddirectly to that, one of my other favourite scenes is from 2x02 when he’spunching the punching bag, and I love thisdetail because you saw him trying to do the same thing in a few instances inthe first season, using his physical body (and inducing physical pain, but moreon that in just a moment) as a way of trying to exorcise his feelings without dealing with them in a significant emotionalway. And that little moment when he rests his head against the punching bag –that’s when he realizes that it’s not working, that this is all too much, thathe can’t punch this away. (Leading into his decision to endanger his own lifeto get Jace back which man oh man I loved that scene too but guy we’re gonna behere all day if I keep doing this.)

I really supermega love the scene on the balcony with Magnus as well, but to try and makethis not a million years long I’m trying to focus in-depth on Alec-only scenesrather than relationship-related scenes. But know that this one is definitelyone of my faves as well. (My favourite Alec quote probably ever is “Thanks, I’vebeen working on [my apology skills]” BECAUSE WHAT THE FUCK THAT’S ADORABLE ANDI LOVE IT. And that smile.)

2x04: The fight with Izzy and thesubsequent cuddle pile

(The ending of 2x03 is another favouritemoment but everything I think about it I just cry and I have nothing good tosay so I’m skipping on to 2x04).

Okay sothe fight with Izzy is deadass one of my favourite Lightwood scenes EVER, and I’vetalked about it so much before so I’ll try and keep this brief but oh my god it’sjust perfect to me in every way. Mostly I can’t stop thinking about how he justcannot even so much as bruise Isabelle when she would literallyrip his heart out if given the chance (I mean, the demon possessing her but youfeel me right). Like, he can’t hit her with a non-lethal shot and instead oftrying to force her off of him he’s just trying to reason with her (Izzy please ugh my heart) and try to gether to overcome the demon and it kills my soul. This is my true favourite Alec,the gentle big brother Alec, and that’s why I love this scene so much. Add thatto the whole “you’re the favourite child” rumination which I love because itjust shows how poorly both the Lightwood kids have been treated by theirparents so that there’s really no favourite child at all, but I talked aboutthat a lot once too lol.

Butspeaking of gentle big brother Alec oh my lord the scene right after Izzy getsunpossessed and the way he holds her and applies the iratze on her (and laterthe way he scoops her up) oh my god I die every time (I don’t think I canestimate to you how many times I’ve watched this scene tbh lol). And when Jacecomes in that little soft hug that passes through all three of them is myfavourite thing in the entire world honestly I can’t believe we were blessedwith a Lightwood group hug in my lifetime. It’s just my favourite thing aboutthem, how they were made to be weapons from childhood and how they’ve had tofend for each other, and how they’re soldiers raised in this militaristic andoppressive society that forces them to be cold and hard and yet they are sosoft and sweet and loving and kind to one another……idk if I’m articulating thiswell at all but I’m just I love itbye.

2x05: Rooftop scene with Jace/fireescape with Magnus

If I hadto pick a solid second favourite, it would probably be these two scenes, when Ithink about it. Ever since season 1, I was very interested in Alec’srelationship regarding the physical and the emotional, because of that wholepile of stuff I wrote under the 2x01 heading right up there (but more examplese.g.  punching Jace when he insinuatesAlec’s feelings for him, and the punching bag scenes in 1x06, 1x08, 1x09). Butthis is another facet to that, which is trying to avoid dealing with the emotionalpain/trauma  that he never ever taughthimself how to handle properly by trying to translate it into self-inflictedphysical pain and injury just to tryand make it go away, and it breaks my heart. I know this is a sensitive issue,so I don’t want to talk about “loving” it or anything like that, but Iappreciate it because it’s very in line with Alec as a character, not only inhis struggles with self-worth that were very apparent throughout the firstseason, but because of the way he was raised informing the way he navigates his emotions(i.e. with a lot of difficulty, and as it becomes apparent, a certain amount ofanguish), as he was both brought up in the emotionally repressive militaristic society of the shadowhunters, and struggled with being gay in an openly homophobic society, which makes it even worse for him compared to the other shadowhunter characters we see. 

Just theimage of Alec’s blood-soaked hand reaching for arrow after arrow that keep further wounding his hand was a very strong one, and it’s the reason whythis scene has stayed with me as a strong Alec moment. And his whole conversationwith Jace added to it just makes it even stronger to me, because it hammershome the guilt and the self-loathing that Alec is feeling not only for Jocelyn,but for apparently failing Jace, and you can feel his shame at hisself-perceived shortcomings coming to light and it’s heartbreaking and just sogood. (I’m not gonna keep saying “yay Matthew” but yay Matthew because he’s sogood he’s so good).

Also sincewe’re talking about 2x05, I loved the little moment with Madzie (that smile curedmy depression im p sure)

2x06: Yeah, the…the whole thing.

Yeah, sothis episode was amazing. Great Alec, great Magnus, great malec, everything sogood.

One of thethings I liked about this as a Matt stan more than anything is just the waythat Alec was allowed to have a little bit of comedy, since he’s usually such aserious character, and Matt just nailed the subtle comedy in lines like “youcan round down, if you want” and the ICONIC “17! 1700? …17000?” moment which wasjust so spectacularly done. And the best acting moment of S2A when Matt “drinksvodka straight out of the bottle” Daddario does the most perfect impression of a non-drinker drinking alcohol (as a nondrinker this was especially special to me lmao).

But morethe actual Alec moments, I think the way his insecurities were portrayed is whatI really loved in this episode? I don’t usually relate to Alec in ways that are less superficial than not drinking alcohol, but in this single specific way only (only this) I find him relatable to the sole extent that asa 20y/o with basically no relationship experience for certain reasons (yeah sadlife whatever leave me alone). But even apart from that and just focusing on Alec, one of my favourite lines was when hesaid “I didn’t want you to think that there was something wrong with me” and “…becauseI knew I could never have what I wanted” or whatever it was) because that’sjust heartbreaking and basically I just love it, I don’t have anything good or profoundto articulate here, I just love this because I’m so happy Alec can finally have what he wanted for so long, after so many sad lonely years of thinking he could never be this happy and i love him and this whole episode okay bye

On ahappier note, I also really loved the pool-playing scene between Magnus and Alec.I love how they showed his competitive spirit and that playful flirty side toboth of them,  it was really cute and Iwant a lot more of it in the future. Like, you don’t see a lot of Alec being competitiveoutside of this moment, and I feel like some of it was dulled a little bit bythe fact that he would always measure himself up against Jace and perceivehimself as coming up short, but I like when you can see his smugness andcompetitiveness come out in certain moments like this one, esp in the way that you can see Magnus making him happier and more open which yes. (And I also likeAlec talking about archery and i want more of that too).

2x07. omamori

I know2x07 was a big giant mess, but I have to give it the omamori scene. I’ve talkedabout it so much because I love it so much, so I’m deadass just going tocopy-paste something I “wrote” before on it (my grammar in this post is weirdly good and mixed up because i had to write it on MS Word and that autocorrects and capitalizes but the following is more indicative of my actual thought processes lol):

the “yesyou” especially killed me like………he’s so sweet, so obliviously sweet?? likethis is alec’s first relationship ever, and it just strikes me as so lovelythat on their second date ever, he’s like “here have this present” like!! forso long he’s never let himself do any of this, indulge in not only love andattraction and desire, but also all of the small relationshippy things - soliterally the first opportunity he gets, he gives magnus a little present:)))))) it makes me almost sad because there’s so much love in this boy and forso long it had nowhere to go and it choked him from the inside out and now hefinally gets to show it and embrace it and give it to somebody special,somebody who will appreciate and return it in kind

and hedoesn’t register or understand magnus’s surprise? he’s like “yes you duh” likeit’s just par for the course, like “this is what you’re supposed to do, isn’tit?” it’s just so fucking………..alec that it hurts

and thatthe omamori represents protection???? oh god i love it so much b/c alec is thisyoung and relatively un-special shadowhunter (in that he doesn’t have any extraspecial angel powers or whatever) and then there’s magnus who’s immortal andamazingly, endlessly powerful, but alec’s instinct is still towards protection.how sweet is this boy

So yeahthat’s that.

2x08 – Runer ceremony & the endscene with Maryse

Okay LASTONE I promise. 2x08 was again chock full of some NICE Alec scenes, and Iespecially love when Alec has scenes with his parents because as a viewer it’ssuch an interesting dynamic that I really want the show to explore a lot.

Anyway, Ilove love love the Rune Ceremony scenefor a lot of reasons, but speaking about Alec particularly I!!! love!!!!proud!!! big!!! brother!!! Alec!!!!!!! and seeing him smile at Max like that made my entire life ho my god.  And there was something very affecting aboutthe fact that since Robert couldn’t be there, it was Alec who had to accompanyMax up to the Silent Brother. idk exactly but I just really love that moment,because I guess it’s this visual representation of the emotional neglect fromthe Lightwood parents, and the way that the children had to start looking outfor each other at such a young age, and the almost parental protectiveness thatAlec has had to develop over his siblings (and his siblings over him as well) becauseof the lack of emotional support from their parents? I love this song tbh and bigbrother Alec is my favourite Alec (and the visual contrast in height betweenJack and Matt in this scene especially is just SO GOOD for this aesthetic too).You can see this dynamic in terms of some other interactions with Alec and Maxthroughout the episode (which, by the way, I loved.) And this whole idea isjust underscored by the fact that Max is so young and is already being sworn into be a soldier, basically, so it really hits home how young Shadowhunters arewhen they’re indoctrinated into this life.

And I lovethe Alec/Jace/Maryse scene at the end because the Lightwoods are such a good family, in that they’re so fuckedup and there’s so much bad shit that goes on, there’s resentment, there’sthinly-veiled homophobia, there’s emotional abuse, there are lies and secrets –but the realness of it is that they’rea family. They’re a complicated, ugly family (when it comes to parent-childdynamics), but there’s love there, even after everything. And there’s the possibility of apology and maybe, maybe, of eventual healing (as testified to by Maryse and Jace’sconversation earlier).

I know theLightwood parents are awful and often emotionally abusive, but Alec’s hug andsupport to Maryse showed so much more about Alec’s character – how heimmediately forgets all the shit he’s been put through when his mother needed ashoulder to cry on. It’s not beautiful and it’s still indicative of a fucked-upfamily dynamic, but Alec and his protective, gentle, and comforting instinctkills my soul – and I love the sort of irony, I guess you could call it, thatit’s this woman that made Alec repress those instincts in an attempt to makehim a perfect soldier, but they were too strong and too much of a part of himfor his kindness and gentleness to completely be stamped out by his upbringing,and now that’s what Maryse needs fromhim in this moment. idk where I’m going with this but you feel me right?

And I’mreally excited to see Alec’s relationship with his father unfold and get moredevelopment. Because Robert was kind to Izzy and wasn’t as openly awful aboutMalec as Maryse was, people got the idea that he was “better” to Alec thanMaryse, but if you look at season one, Robert did his fair share of mistreatingAlec (not to mention that thinly-veiled dig at Magnus being a “lothario”). SoTodd & Darren teased that Alec/Robert scene and my god they better deliveron this and deliver properly becauseit’s all I want.

2x10: REAL QUICK so I really really likedthe “I love you” malec scene from 2x10 but I wrong a long-ass answer on that back then, so I’m not gonna get into it nowI literally have no more words to say about it lmao

AND YUPTHERE IT IS. These are my favourite Alec scenes. I think I did okay, all thingsconsidered.