#like i would probably have to move to part time or actually do a... ausbildung
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if all these fucking forms weren't so difficult to fill out I potentially wouldn't struggle actually doing them tbh
#cylas speaks#if they ask if any illness has affected my work of academic life do they mean mental illness as well?#and. like. what do i write for why i applied for this specific thing. what i expect to accompish. what my goals are.#I've had the last official meeting with that career coaching support whatever person like three weeks ago and already am doubting everything#again#still havent contacted that one place i was thinking of maybe working at even though it would be good#i could do like a test week#but it'd be a regular 5 day week with weekends off ahshsha#and every time i am at work i have 'well this isnt that bad though is it? maybe i could continue doing this?' moments#like i would probably have to move to part time or actually do a... ausbildung#but yeah#still the other thing would make sense as well#I'm just. scared. idk. new things and change scary yknow.#i should get out the contact info#technically already have i think bc i needed some stuff i had in the same folder for the form#maybe they have an email address#still dont know what to say/write in jt#dont know what to put in that one form either#like 'idk that lady from the coaching told me to do this and we talked about a lot but i already forgot half of it and can't explain the#other half yknow'#take the fact that it took me three weeks to get this one form done as evidence that i am not a functional human being
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