#like i said i think we did kind of need a breather this week

[endless-ineffabilities]

the other side of the door (1/2)

Ewan Mitchell x bestfriend!reader

a/n: so there was this, and now you have this. bish bash bosh.

main masterlist

The one wherein your best friend breaks your heart.

The cast has gathered in Tom's apartment for the night, drinks and conversation flowing freely. Ewan brought you with him, as he always does. You've been his constant plus-one — to parties, premieres, and even group holidays.

You've been around them so much, that the cast members already consider you as their good friend.

When they first met you, they had mistakenly thought you were Ewan's girlfriend.

But no, he profusely fended off such allegations, clarifying that you were his "bestfriend, and other half." Doesn't he know that calling you his other half kind of makes it worse?

Because you want them to be right.

You've been in love with him for a while now.

And he doesn't feel the same. Talk about the sob story of your life.

Not too long ago, you and Ewan were a tangle of limbs on your couch, covered in layers of sweaters and duvets to keep warm. A film played on TV. It used to be one of your favourites, but not after that night.

One glass of wine led to another—a kiss on the forehead, a peck on the cheek, brushes of skin against skin.

And suddenly, you were kissing him.

And he was kissing you back with just as much fervour. Just as much love.

Or so you thought.

"Wait, love," he panted, pulling away, his forehead still pressed against yours. His every exhale fanned warmth over your face, and he was all you felt. All you saw, all you smelled. He was all around you.

"What?"

"We can't," he whispered, and you strained to hear him. "We can't do this."

Your chest tightened, and judging by his worried expression, he can see the distress clear on your face.

"Why not?" you asked meekly, your hands still clutching his chest.

He smiled sadly, brushing your hair away from your face. "We're best friends, my darling. I don't want to ruin this. What we have—it's good. Don't we keep saying that it's forever? I mean that."

"I know," you replied, shaking your head slightly, "but we've known each other for years, Ewan. Did you never think... about us? And how we could be... We could be good together."

"We are good together," he insisted. "Which is why we shouldn't change this. We're only going to mess it up."

"But I—"

"And," he cut you off, "I don't think I want to get into something like that right now. My career's just taking off, and I want to pour my entire self into it." He laughed dryly, as if infusing casual humour into the situation and trying to make it seem like it's not a big deal would make it all better. "Hell, I can't even think about dating anyone."

But I'm not just anyone, you wanted to say, but you kept it in. You know Ewan, and once he has his mind set, there is no changing it. Not without great effort and cause anyway.

You did your best to avoid him for an entire week after that, ignoring his calls and his extensive voicemails, but he eventually wore you down, showing up at your door with a bouquet of flowers and a massive tray of your favourite dessert.

A peace offering. You're his best friend and he can't bear to have a rift between the two of you, he said.

He was right.

You want—need—him around. No matter what. Your true feelings can take the back burner.

This is meant to be forever, after all.

The hour is late and you feel exhaustion setting in. You think of heading home, but you can't find Ewan anywhere, and you have been searching for the last ten minutes.

"Hey, girly!" Phia cheerily says as she stumbles upon you in the hallway. "You alright?"

"Yeah, just a bit tired. Have you seen Ewan?"

"Oh, I don't know," she immediately replies. "He's not in the living area, last I checked. Maybe he's in one of the rooms upstairs? Taking a breather?"

"Oh, could he be?" He normally doesn't leave you all alone during these things, so if he's nowhere in sight, he must really need a minute to himself.

Before you can protest, Phia loops her arm around yours. "I'll come with you, love. Let's go and have a look."

Phia chats your ear off and you are grateful for the distraction, but nothing could have prepared you for what comes next.

You hear hushed voices from inside one of the rooms. As you near the one farthest from the staircase, the voices become clearer. The door is open just a crack, but the guest room is tiny enough that even the softest sounds are amplified in it.

There's a man's voice. Ewan's, as distinguishable to you as your favourite melody. Followed by a lilting, high-pitched giggle.

"I'm serious, Lou," Ewan says, raising his voice a tad, "I think I've had enough to drink."

Louise, the twins' cousin, groans playfully. You hear some shuffling. A mattress creaking under weight. "You're such a lightweight, Ewan."

"Hey! I'm not a lightweight," Ewan counters, humour seeping in his tone.

"Oh yeah?" Her voice drops to a sultry drawl. "So you're sober enough to come here and kiss me then?"

Your stomach lurches. You've only had one drink, yet the room tilts, and the walls seem to spin around you. You catch Phia's eye—her expression mirrors your disbelief, wide-eyed and incredulous.

She is about to push the door open, when you catch her wrist and shake your head vehemently. You whisper urgently, "Phi, let's just go."

"What? But he—" She pauses when the first smacking noises resound from the room. Louise moans against Ewan as she kisses him.

As he kisses her.

So much for him claiming he didn't want to date anyone. Maybe he just didn't want to date you. Let alone want you the way he clearly wants her—the way he's having her behind that door.

"What about the girl you came with?" you hear her ask.

"What girl?" He breathes, actually sounding confused. You feel nothing more than an afterthought. Just some girl he can't even remember.

Certainly not his forever. You're not even his 'right now'.

"Fuckin' hell," Phia curses under her breath.

"Oh," Ewan says, as it finally dawns on him, "she's... she's just my friend."

"Phia, let's go please," you repeat, more insistent this time. She hears the desperation in your tone and takes your hand comfortingly, pulling you along downstairs.

Fabien stands near the foot of the staircase, absently nursing his drink while scrolling through his phone. His gaze shifts when he spots the two of you, eyebrows lifting in mild curiosity.

"Whoa there," he says, his eyes scanning your face with concern. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing—"

But Phia interjects roughly. "We're beating Ewan up later."

"Phia, come on," you mumble, growing embarrassed, "It's not a big deal. He can do whatever he wants."

"But he told me—"

"Wait," Fabien says, catching on, "Ewan's up there doing what with who?"

Before Phia can go on a passionate tirade, you exhale loudly, "Look, you guys. I just want to go home. I'll say bye to everyone and get out of here."

Fabien puts his drink down somewhere. "I'll go with you," he offers, without giving it much thought. "Since Ewan's occupied, and we hate him now apparently—"

Your brows raise, while Phia merely gives a thumbs up.

"—someone needs to see you home safe."

You smile gratefully. "You sure, Fabs? I don't want you to miss out on the rest of the party."

"Ah, don't worry about it," he smirks, casually throwing an arm around your shoulders as you head to the main room. "Knowing Tom, there'll be another one of these things next week."

Ewan stumbles down the stairs, his steps unsteady from the weight of too many drinks. But there's something else, a deeper unease twisting in his gut that he can't quite shake.

He needs you to make it all better, but where are you?

When he finds Phia pouring herself a glass of water in the kitchen, he asks for one too.

But she icily responds, "Pour yourself one."

"What?" He asks, but he doesn't dwell on it. "Do you know where—"

"She left," Phia shrugs, and Ewan wonders why she said that smugly, "not too long ago."

"What do you mean she left?" Ewan straightens, growing alert despite the haze of the alcohol.

"She was tired. Wanted to go home. She came upstairs to get you, but you seemed busy. So Fabien offered to accompany her, the sweetheart that he is."

The flood of information overwhelms him, but it's nothing compared to the hollow ache of your absence.

"I... I wasn't busy..."

"We heard you, Ewan," Phia says, disappointed. She watches the realisation dawn on his face for a full minute. The dread. The self-loathing. "I mean, it's none of my business. But maybe wipe that lipstick off your neck. It's bloody gross."

[haikyu-mp4]

A light in the dark

Fluffy workplace romance working at a funeral home with your crush Matsukawa, for my workplace romance event <3

requested by @haikyuuadict. word count; 706 – gn!reader

How did you end up as Mattsun’s regular work partner, you say? It’s because none of the other workers can stand your superior humour. Or everyone else found both of you annoying and decided to group you for every shift you had. From making inappropriate jokes in meetings to asking for second rounds of wine at church, you two were certified menaces to work with.

Jokes on them, you two love working together. To the extent that you developed an unspoken crush.

When the whole team was invited to a work party in October, hosted in the less morbid parts of the funeral home, you both looked at each other with wicked grins.

It’s October, surely this is a costume party.

So the two of you showed up with sheets over your heads and sunglasses on top to mark your faces, making spooky sounds with your arms raised when you entered.

The majority of your coworkers frowned in near disgust, shaking their heads and looking away. You couldn’t see that well, so you lifted your sheet discreetly and took a sharp breath at the sight.

“Matsukawa,” you whispered, slapping your hand on his arm. “No one else is wearing costumes.”

“What?” he whisper-yelled, copying your move of lifting the sheet, but a little less discreetly. Your eyes travelled down from his face to his formal shirt, unbuttoned at the top for a breather, probably thinking he would wear the costume all night.

“Couldn’t even throw on a tie?” you teased, ears red when his eyes travelled down your pretty blouse and suit pants in return.

“Well, not all ghosts got invited to fancy parties. Didn’t you literally wear that to work last week?” he teased back, and the two of you eventually just let the sheets rest on your shoulders like informal capes.

“Hey, our job requires formal attire. Didn’t know you took such great notice of my outfits, anyway.” You walked over to the buffet table, pulling Matsukawa along by the wrist.

The two of you ended up sitting across from each other on a table in an adjacent room, each with a paper plate filled with food and trying to stifle your laughter.

“You? I can’t imagine you were that terrifying on the court, Matsukawa,” you commented after he told you more about his volleyball career.

“I didn’t need to look scary. They all fell in love with me and refused to hit the ball past me.” Your laugh sounded more like a snort, a sound that made Mattsun smile. The kind of smile that suggested you were the brightest light source in the room.

“Understandable.”

“Hey, why do you still call me Matsukawa?” he questioned as your laughter died down.

“We’re coworkers,” you said, but it didn’t sound as confident as you wanted it to. “You call me by my last name, too.”

“What if we stopped doing that? It’s mostly just the two of us at work, I don’t think our other coworkers could dislike us any more than they already do.”

You pulled the sheet back over your head, trying not to laugh at the joke that brewed in your mind before you even got to say it. “They’re such boomers,” you said, putting a spooky voice effect around the word boo.

Mattsun wishes he had a plan for what he did next, but it surprised him just as much as it surprised you. He leaned forward, tilting his head and pressing his lips against yours over the ghost sheet.

Neither of you moved much, taking in the rough feeling of the cheap sheet before leaning away, only for you to throw the costume off to stare at him.

“Issei,” you whispered. And the smile you gave him next was one he swore could have woken the dead. You leaned forward with one hand between you on the table, the other taking hold of his shirt to pull him closer for another kiss.

This time you got to enjoy it, even letting your tongue have a taste of the poorly brewed coffee that lingered on his lips.

With such a depressing profession, he felt lucky you ended up in the same place, a light to hold his hand through the darkness.

masterlist

[speedycoffeedelight]

An Animalistic Disaster

CH-21 : Reactions to episode 3 and 4

Summary: Just as the title says.

Masterlist

A.N :T.W : Sexual abuse, emotional abuse, physical abuse (All the stuff Angel went through. Remember to take a breather while reading the chapter if you need it.)

You were able to convince your co-worker to work your shift quickly. It took some persuasion but you won in the end. Now you had at least a couple of days to yourself to relax and let go. Soon enough, Niffty came back with three plates of food and Cherri helped her carry them.

"I cooked spicy chicken yesterday. Tell me if it gets too for you to handle." Cherri said laughing as you were handed a plate each and a glass of water. The dish looked delectable. As soon as you were handed the plate, you began to wolf it down from hunger.

It was indeed quite spicy. It burnt on your tongue. Yet you couldn't stop eating. The flavours were literally bursting in your mouth like a bomb. You finished the plate in light speed and held out the empty plate towards Cherri.

"Seconds please!"

After the three of you were done eating, all of you again sat back in the same position as before. This time you leaned back on Angel a bit from how full you felt. As soon as everyone was in place again, you started episode 3.

.

.

.

.

' That looks perfect! ' Charlie exclaimed with happiness.

It looked like Pentious had successfully stayed a whole week with them already. Pentious soon came inside the hotel with a large cannon.

' I'm really looking forward to shooting the other residents. '

' What? Why? '

' Everyone is being too nice. Obviously it must be a lie. I can sense they are planning to kill me. But when? How? I must be.. prepared! '

Oh Pentious, sweetie, you can relate to not being used to kindness too. It almost always makes you second guess thinking they are just faking things for you or you don't deserve it. Or they have some ulterior motive.

' People are being nice because they want you to feel welcome '

As soon as Vaggie said that, it cut off to Husk and Angel giving Pentious the middle finger and Niffty smiling creepily at him. "You really want me to believe your words when they're like that?" Pentious commented pointing at the screen and looking at Charlie. "I'm sure they mean no harm...just watch." She said looking at the screen again.

' And you need to get rid of these...things. Oh, what did I just say? What did I just say? '

' What not my little egg Bois. They do my evil bidding for me. '

"Nooo, Vaggie let them stay. They're adorable!" You pleaded giving the human Vaggie puppy eyes and Pentious joined you. Vaggie rubbed between her eyes in frustration. "Fine...I would but you know I can't control what happens there."

"Oh...right..."

' Do you want to stay here and redeem yourself? '

' Yesss...? '

' Then no more eggs '

"Vaggie that's cruel. How could you." You dramatically sayed as she rolled her eyes. You leaned over and patted Pentious on his shoulder. " Don't worry, I'm on your side okay?" Pentious nodded with a sad smile.

Pentious in the show acted like the eggs couldn't bear to leave him as the eggs just followed Vaggie without a question. Then it cut off to a .... rotting deer? And Alastor eating the said rotten deer with a fork and a knife?

"Alastor Ew, what the fuck?" You looked over at Alastor. Charlie, Angel, Pentious and Cherri had the same reaction as you. Vaggie looked like it was nothing new and Niffty and Husk were already used to this. "Alastor if you wanted we could get you some fresh meat you know!" Charlie exclaimed. "You just had to ask!"

"Mmm, no. I prefer hunting my own meals myself." Alastor said with a grin. "It's far more entertaining ~"

" Why am I even surprised..." Angel facepalmmed. "Whatevah, continue the episode (Y/n). " And you did. Alastor's room was pretty interesting, with half of the room being a forest and other half normal. And apparently that dead rotten deer was his breakfast. How he could eat that disgusting smelly corpse was beyond you.

" Alastor....is this why your teeth are yellow? Cause you don't brush your teeth..? "

" Oh heavens no darling. I am quite hygienic, I assure you. They were like this since I fell in hell. "

" .....It better be or else I don't want your nasty ass breath near me."

That ticked off Alastor a little as his left eye twitched. "Nasty you say... I'll get as close to you as I want, wether you like it or not. I'm afraid you don't have a choice in that matter."

Why did your stomach did a flip at that? Control yourself (Y/n)!

Alastor agreed to Vaggie to take care of the egg Bois humanely after she told him to. Charlie was trying to ease the tension in the hotel as Pentious squeezed Niffty with his tail to kill her. Though Niffty seemed to be enjoying it. Charlie decided they would do trust exercises to build bond between the hotel members.

' Oh I will. But it's cash up front. And I know that one, can't afford me. '

' Gross. I'd never think of it spider. '

" That's right baby. It takes money to get this body movin! " Angel pointed at himself. " Though I might do it for free for you (Y/n)~ think of it as paying back for all you've done for me." Angel whispered in your ear seductively making shiver run through you. Vaggie pushed Angel's face away. "No, you are not doing those. (Y/n) are you okay? I can move this freak if you want to." She asked tenderly while putting a hand on your shoulder.

God why were they all so beautiful and so keen on making you blush. You felt like your face was red as a tomato now as you moved your head sheepishly. "N-no, you don't have to move him, ahaha..." You thought he was just messing with you. Since Angel is supposed to be gay after all so you wouldn't get your hopes up. Angel on the other hand smirked seeing the effect he had on you.

Charlie entrusted Vaggie to lead the trust exercise. They had to share something vulnerable about themselves with the group. She went full military mode with the explanation. Charlie went first with the exercise as she expressed how much she loved the members and fell on Vaggie's arm. You gave the Charlie beside you a headpat.

Angel went on the stage next.

' I love to suck - '

' I swear to fuck if you say dicks! '

' Popsicles you sicko. Getcho mind outta gutter. '

Husk grumbled beside you in frustration as Angel laughed at him. Cherri joined in too. The Angel in the show and then fell down on Husk's arms. Despite Vaggie saying everyone had to catch him, none but Husk did.

' But you know, dicks too. '

And Husk let him fall. Pentious was next. He expressed dramatically how he didn't want to live without his minions and he didn't want anyone to catch him.

' Damn it. '

But he got caught by everyone. Next was Niffty's turn as she quickly ran to the stage, scurrying with her little legs.

' Sometimes, I kill mother bugs in front of their children as a warning to others. '

Everyone, minus Alastor and Niffty was horrified. Suddenly, you didn't feel so safe anymore with her in front of you. When Niffty turned around to give you a smile it only made you gulp in fear as you gave a nervous smile back. You made a mental note to yourself to never mess with Niffty.

No one caught her after she jumped. It was understandable why.

' Yay! Pain! '

However it looked like she didn't mind it one bit. She kept going up the stage and jumping down from it. "...Heeeey Angel? Wanna switch places with me?" You whispered. However Angel turned your head straight around with his hands. "No thanks, I don't wanna go anywhere near her. You're all on your own toots, sorry. " ' Traitor....' you thought bitterly in your mind.

' I like your suit. '

' What are the antlers for? '

' Can I touch your staff thing? '

' Are those your ears or is it your hair? '

Alastor eyes twitched with annoyance as they kept questioning him. Finally, they were asking the real questions. "Alastor, mind answering those questions for us? I'm curious too. " You looked at him only to see his smile seemed strained and his eye brows furrowed. "I believe it is none of your business. Now use your hands to start the video again before I rip it off. " You've never started a video again so fast before.

A new Character showed up. It seemed like Alastor and this Zestial knew each other. And from how people scattered from him you guessed it he has to be one of the powerful demons. He talked like an ancient being too. He was an overlord apparently. As they both went up a lift, a little eggboi named Frank got stuck with them.

' Oh look, Frank is up there. '

' We have names? '

Hehe, you can already see that egg being a fun little addition to the meeting. There were other overlords too. It was some kind of overlord meeting. And there was Rosie! You couldn't wait to hear how she sounded like. Fandom has been going nuts over her since the trailer dropped.

' Alastor? '

' Yes I know. I've been absent sometime. I'm sure you've all been wondering. '

' Not really. But welcome back in any case. '

The way his face srunched up at surprise at her not caring made you want to laugh your heart out. He got mad because someone didn't care enough about him? Aww. Adorable.

' No, they have better shit to do then to listen to an old windbag who thinks she's tough shit. I'm here to represent. '

Velvette entered the meeting. Vox and Valentino apparently would stay absent. Then before they could resume, she threw an angel's head on the table. A collective gasp came from everyone in the room.

' Ohh, tasty '

Alastor why are you like this..

As Velevette was trying to tell them about their plan to fight back, Zestial interrupted her to know how foolish it was. To which Velevette responded with teasing and calling him old man. As Zestial was talking with her you noticed Alastor having a test of the head. Gross.

' Oh what's the matter fossil? Too senile to make a real power grab ? '

' You better show some respect!

Check your behaviour '

That song came outta nowhere. Sick guitar sounds too.

' Haha. You've got it twisted.

I'm not the one who needs a new attitude.

Maybe you missed it,

But I'm that #Bitch '

Okay, this was nice. You were jamming to the song. Her singing voice was nice.

' I'm the backbone of the V's '

You paused to check what was written. Damn, vox sent her a 'behave' text. Also the little ice cream of them seemed tasty.

' Oops, did I strike a nerve?

' Cause when I brought out the Angel's

head

Couldn't help but observe

That your wrinkled face was turning

red '

Hm, maybe Carmila does have something to do with the head? And velvette was trying to coax it out of her.

' That was a productive meeting '

Shut it Alastor. Well, it was indeed interesting to say the least. Carmila ended the meeting abruptly. Alastor noticed Carmila and Zestial going into a room together so he sent Frank after them.

"Alastor, nothing better happen to my egg Boi." Pentious whispered. To which he rolled his eyes. "Come on, it's just an egg. You can make more surely. "

Angel brought the gang to to bondage club later. You had to laugh at the absurdity.

' What makes you think anyone would be into this? '

' Y'know, I, I don't hate this. '

Old man Husk to go. That purring was also adorable.

' I'm ready to punish some bad boys. '

Niffty? Damn that girl was packing inside that dress. Good for her. Vaggie then took them to a freaking battle ground to build trust.

' Buckle up buttercups. Because today you boys become men. '

Intense. It was the only word you could use to describe her training. Vaggie chucked both Pentious and Angel out from the roof. Husk quickly dipped while Vaggie wasn't looking. Niffty was excited to be thrown but got stopped by Charlie.

' I'm supposed to never fail you..'

' You didn't fail me. Vaggie you're not..'

' If I can't help you what's the point of me? '

Poor Vaggie. She was looking down, avoiding both your and Charlie's gaze. They both took some time off to themselves. You slid both of your hands behind Charlie and Vaggie back and squished them together, making them smile a bit.

Zestial was trying to convince Carmila to share her secrets with him. So it was pretty much confirmed it was her.

' But if anyone knew

Then all of hell would rise to war. '

So that was her reason for hiding the news. She didn't want to risk her daughter's life. It's understandable.

' When I saw your face

You made me feel like stranger in a

brand new place '

Vaggie's singing too? That's cool. And her voice was really soothing as well.

' I'll spend my life being your partner. '

Charlie didn't know when she started crying. " Vaggie.." she sniffed. " I love youuuu" she pulled her in a hug again. " I love you too Hun. " She mumbled and kissed Charlie's forehead. Your heart, it felt like it was going to melt. You wanted a relationship like them, badly.

' What was the last thing? '

' She killed the angel ? '

' Interesting.. '

Alastor chuckled darkly beside you. He was definitely cooking something evil with that knowledge.

' At least you can take beating like a champ. You did okay new kid. '

All of the residents were getting a bit better with eachother. Laughing and joking. This episode ended nicely with Pentious going to sleep with his egg Bois all cozy and nicely. As soon as the episode was over, people started to talk with each other. However you didn't realise how little this happy time would last with the next episode..

After a few minutes of talking, you started episode four. Everyone was excited to watch the next episode. And it started with Angel tied up? You and the others were concerned for a moment before it turned out to be a....porn that Angel was showing to the hotel residents. Alastor and Pentious's face scrunched up at the noise of Angel's moans. And you...you didn't know how to feel to be honest.

' Fuck you, this is classy art. '

And it showed a wolf slapping Angel's ass and biting so big that you were sure he took a chunk out of his ass. And god the moaning. You were a blushing mess already.

' That's bullshit. You get drunk and bitch and moan all the time. Everyone likes to bitch to the bartender. I know everything about you and these motherfucker's at this point. '

Yeah, Husk gets to listen to a lot of tales doesn't he? No wonder he's one of the most knowledgeable and the most tired one of the group.

' That one, that one is an insecure buffon who's lonely ass watches you idiots

sleep. '

"Pentious does what?" Charlie asked looking at him shocked as Pentious looked terrified at the glare he was getting. He quickly waved his hands in front of him. "W-wait, this is just in the show. I haven't done anything like that yet! Please spare me miss Vaggie.."

' Princess is a bleeding heart who wants to solve everybody else's problem except her own. '

' What? No. I. What. Ohh. No. '

Yep she definitely does.

' This one judges everyone and everything because she hates herself. '

Aww, Vaggie...poor girl.

' And Niffty? Argh,you don't even wanna know what her deal is. '

If Husk says so, you'll believe him. Though you didn't need Husk to spell out how dangerous Niffty was.

' Kittens got claws,meoow~ '

' And you, don't get me started. I see right through you and all these bullshit and how fake you are. '

Somehow, that got him agitated. While talking with Husk suddenly a call came in Angel's phone. And from the looks of it, it must have been Valentino. God damn that guy.

' Okay, I could be so aggressively kind to Angel's boss that I convince him to let Angel spend more time at the hotel. '

Ah, fuck, fuck, FUCK. This was going to go horribly wrong. You could feel that in every inch of your body. Valentino and Charlie meeting is never going to go well.

"Oh nonono.. please. Please don't go there. " Angel mumbled above you while inching close to the Laptop. It almost looked like he wanted to go inside and stop Charlie if he could. On one hand, you wanted Charlie to find out about the shit Angel goes through so she could help him out. But in the other hand, you didn't want that thinking about in how many ways that could go wrong.

Angel facepalmmed. Almost looking defeated and tensed beside you as the show went on. The show cut off to Angel in middle of the shooting. Between that, Angel caught the sight of Charlie coming inside the studio. "Fuck!" Angel cursed above you. Charlie blushed as a female sinner took off their bra and flashed Charlie right in her face. Vaggie grumbled beside you in jealousy.

' What in the ever loving fuck are you doing here? '

' I am the princess of hell Angel and I go where I please. I'm here to get you some time off for the hotel. '

Charlie's intention was nice. But, god, you still had a bad feeling.

' I'm...coming! '

' Not off camera you're not. '

Fucking Val... Before Angel could get Charlie out Valentino took notice. Both real life Angel and cartoon Angel cursed.

' What can I do for such a... '

' Ahh, no thank you..'

Did...Did that motherfucker just lick Charlie's arm??? Oh hell fucking no! Vaggie screamed beside you. "That's fucking it! It was a fucking mistake to let you go alone! I swear to fucking god when I see that moth I'm going to rip him to pieces!" You felt the same. " I want to fucking rip his tongue out for doing that to Charlie.

Alastor clicked his tongue. "Such disgusting behaviour. I wouldn't have expected any better from those lot."

' Make us both richer then well, your papito- '

' Fuck, nooo. I.. I'm sorry..'

That fucking prick. How dare he suggest something like that to her.

' Not at all, princess... '

He was mad, he was really really mad. And the way he looked at Angel, he was probably going to take it out on him. You didn't know if your heart was prepared for it. "Charlie, you're fucking things up..a lot.." Husk commented, he already had an idea on what was going to happen having a shitty boss himself.

And then Charlie tripped and disconnected a wire making everything go on fire. Valentino glared at Angel and stood up. He put off all of the fire with a swish of his wings that you didn't know he had beforehand.

' Angel, can I see you in your dressing room for a moment? '

Suddenly Angel's hand came and paused it the video. His hand was shaky. He could already anticipate what was going to come. And he didn't know if he would be able to face others after that. After they see him like that.

"Angel, I'm really really sorry. I really just wanted to do something good for you and I -" Angel cut Charlie off with a finger as he turned to you. His face was darkened. "(Y/n), is there any way I can see this? Alone? Please?" You completely understood why he would want that as you nodded and brought out your phone and unlocked it.

" Y-you can watch it on my phone in the other room if you want. Is that okay? " You whispered, feeling scared for him. He grabbed your phone, refusing to look at you or anyone else in the room as he stood up and went to the other room. You called out to Cherri immediately. "Please go to him. I don't want him to stay alone...he might allow you to stay." Cherri nodded at you as she went to the other room.

You looked back at the others who looked anxious. You took a deep breath. "Whatever happens.... let's make sure to give Angel some time after this.." with that, you paused the episode, preparing yourself for the worst.

Angel hurriedly searched up the episode in the other room as he noticed Cherri come in. "Cherri! Go...watch with the others.." he said looking down. "No way bitch, I ain't letting my best friend be alone in a time like this." She said popping down beside him. "We're going to watch this shit together. "

.

.

.

.

' Val, I didn't know that- '

Before Angel could say anything Valentino slapped him across the face with the back of his hand making his eye swollen. You hissed at the impact.

' You really think you can have Lucifer's little bitch fight back for you? '

' Val please I'm sorry she- '

' You'd bring her here to protect you? To fuck with me? '

' Argh, fuck..! '

This whole thing was really really painful to watch. You could feel tears pricking at the corners of your eyes as you watched Angel being thrown around like a rag doll by that motherfucking no good son of a bitch. With every slap and hiss of Valentino, Charlie was whimpering beside you. Tears already falling from her eyes as she held your arm. Vaggie and Pentious was looking away from time to time, not being able to stomach it. This scene was much more brutal and disturbing then the music video.

Alastor also had a disturbed look on his face, his smile cracking slightly from the distasteful sight in front of him. Husk closed his eyes but the sound of Angel's whimpers still rang in his ears. How he wanted to drown himself in booze right now. Even Niffty wasn't enjoying this.

Everytime Val hit Angel in the show, it felt like he was getting hurt in real life. He whimpered and hugged himself close to him. Cherri could feel his pain. She patted his back slowly as to not set him off. She knew too much touch will only set him off more.

' You think she can get you out of work? '

' No, no, t-that's not what I'm trying to do...no..argh- '

Valentino had a firm grip on Angel's neck as he looked down at him menacingly and threw him to the floor. Angel was coughing and breathing heavily, trying to get air back in his lungs.

' You know she can't do anything. I own you. Or have you forgotten that ? '

" No "

Valentino made a smoke collar and dragged Angel up by it. He summoned the contract paper Angel had signed. It was signed in his real name, Anthony.

It wasn't a surprise to you. Angel's real name was revealed in a hunicast livestream before. So was Vaggie's. But to the other sinners sitting beside you, it was a big deal. Charlie was slamming on the floor, feeling helpless for not being able to do anything. Vaggie went to her side, trying to comfort her. Pentious was full on crying as well while hugging his knees to his chest. You squeezed Niffty close to you as waterworks were coming from your eyes.

Angel's situation was worser as he almost began to have trouble breathing. This..this was shown to everyone in the other room. What would they think of him now. He felt so open, so exposed. Even more then when he filmed porn. This was a side he kept to himself. He was an actor. He acted wherever he went. He acted that he was fine and everything was fine. He's got it under control. But now, that won't work anymore. They knew how things truly were. And it scared him. It scared him to know that they could use this information to hurt him even more then he already is.

He doesn't know if he's prepared for that.

' When I say come, you say.. '

' Yes Valentino '

' When I say you're fucking twenty guys before lunch you say.. '

' Yes Valentino '

' When I say you better get that fucking cunt out of my studio, you say.. '

' I-i '

' You. Say. '

' Look Val. She just gets involved in everything. I'll.. I'll tell her to leave. Just don't hurt her '

Charlie let out a chocked sob at that. "It's... it's all my fault....Vaggie.. Angel..he got hurt because of...me.. I'm a monster.." She looked at her hands. Vaggie shooked her before she went too far in her head and cupped her cheeks to make Charlie look at her.

" Honey listen, none of this is your fault okay. You tried to help him. You really did. Things just didn't go as planned okay?" Vaggie embraced and held her close. "But it is her fault in a sense." Husk commented sounding cold and distant. "She wandered into a territory she didn't know about. She lived in hell all her fucking life. She should know how fucked up things can get here. " Charlie let out a another sob. You could feel the tension between the crew rising. Now, you began to wonder if it was a good idea to let them react in the first place...

"Husk if you don't shut the fuck-" " Vaggie please stop." Charlie held out a hand in front of Vaggie's face to stop her from talking. " Husk is right....I didn't understand. I was ...I was fool! " She clenched her fists and shut her eyes. "Charlie -" before Vaggie could say anything you put your hand above hers, moving your head.

You know Vaggie wanted to comfort Charlie badly. You did too. But she shouldn't baby her. Charlie had to learn from her mistakes. Her intention might have been good but she should have learnt when to stay away and when to give someone privacy. There are no excuses for that pain Angel went through for that.

After everyone was a bit settled down, you paused the episode in complete silence. You guys did have a rule, you couldn't go away until the episode was finished. You prayed things will change a bit for the better by then.

' What makes you think you can treat him like that? '

Seeing Angel get thrown onto bed harshly, it was enough to make Charlie go mad. She went into her demon mode. You were excited thinking finally she was about to kick Val's ass but..

' Charlie! Just stop. '

Oh no...angel... please no... please let her get angry.

' You actually wanna help me? Get the fuck outta here. Right now. And let me finish my work. '

That voice crack in Angel's voice there. It was certain that he was trying really hard to not break down in front of her. How long was this supposed to hurt you.

' And action. '

There was a song right after this happened ? Really?

' I'm not above love to cash in

Another lover underneath those flashing lights

Another one of those ruthless nights

Yeah yeah yeah '

Angel wiped his tears as he focused on the song. Listening to the lyrics with his heart.

' What's the worst part of this hell?

I can only blame myself '

That line, it was brutal. It shook you to the very core.

' 'Cause I know you're poison

You're feeding me poison

Addicted to this feelin'

I can't help swallow

Up your poison

I made my choice and

Every night I'm living like there's no

tomorrow. '

These lyrics actually said a lot about him. About his situation. How he knows what he does is destroying him from the inside yet he can't stop it, he's addicted to it. It hurt to look how happy he acted during the song, knowing how fake those were.

' My stories gonna end with me dead

from your poison '

Oh god no. You prayed this wasn't a prediction of what will happen in the future.

' I got so good at being untrue

I got so good at telling you

What you wanna hear

I disassociate, disappear '

Every bit of these lyrics felt like belts hitting you over and over again. You wanted to run to that room and check over Angel, right fucking now. But you knew if you did that, others will come following behind as well and it will only make things hard for Angel. Last thing you wanted to do right now was to make a mistake like Charlie and make things worse.

' Poison, I'm drownin' in poison

I'm fillin up my glass

But it's always hollow

Full of poison, I'm sick of the poison

Wish I had something to live for 

tomorrow '

Charlie hugged you as soon as the last line was over. Both Husk and Alastor had their ears pulled down. Husk felt a strange attachment to him. No matter how much he tried he couldn't shake it off. It's not like he was thinking Angels situation was any better than what he saw.  He knew more them well how bad being under a overlord can be. He was under one after all. He wanted to make him a drink and let him vent to him. It was a weird new feeling.

He never actually wanted that for anyone before. It always annoyed him how people would go on and on after being drunk. He didn't ask to be trauma dumped always . He had his own shit to handle. But right now, he wanted to be there for Angel, show him he wasn't alone. It was stupid. But, it wasn't so bad...He decided, after this was over. He'll go have a talk with him .

' Fukin' Christ. You can drop the act already. It's never gonna work on me. So all your doin' is makin' an ass outta yourself with this fake bullshit. '

' Call me fake one more time motherfucker. I dare you. '

' Fake. '

' Fucking asshole - '

So those little pink dots of his were actually eyes. You never knew that. You were started to sniff a bit quietly now.

' You know how much I'm worth? Haha..you know how many people would kill to have Angel dust come onto them? '

"Angel, he objectifies himself. " Vaggie whispered. "He finds his value in his much he's worth.." her somber voice said quietly. You also understood that. That manic looks in his eyes as he said that, oof...

Later Charlie and Vaggie made Husk go after Angel to make sure he was alright. "C'mon ...why can you guys just leave me alone for a bit.." Angel whispered in the other room, feeling another sense of dread. Was there going to be any end of that today? Why did it feel like this show was targeting him specifically.

Husk noticed one of the guys who was with Angel slip something into his drink. Before that prick could hand it to Angel, Husk shoved him off and dragged Angel out of the bar.

' You just let people drug you all the time? '

' You think I asked for it? '

Oh no, another fresh wave of tears was approaching. Fuck it all..fuck this shit. Husk please do something, anything.

' It's not an act! It's who I need to be. And this? This is my escape. Where I can forget about it all. And how much I hate.. everything. A place where I can get high, and not care about how much it hurts. And maybe if I can ruin myself enough in the process. If I end up broken, I won't be his favourite toy anymore. And maybe he'll let me go..'

You were sure that touched everyone's heart right now. Including Alastor's. The urge to just go and comfort him increased tenfold. "Angel...." You softly whispered.

' I was an overlord once you know...yeah.  And uh,it was nice to have that power. But when you're dealin' in souls, while also being a gambler. The stakes are pretty high.'

Husk was a...what? What's with this sudden lore drop.

' So when you're down in your luck, you turn to anything to keep you afloat. Even making deals yourself. '

It showed a bit of Husk losing to Alastor. So he lost to Alastor in a bet and then sold his soul to stay safe. His grumpy attitude towards Alastor made so much more sense now. Husk grumbled, he didn't want this part of his side shown so abruptly.

' So things look bad

And your back's against the wall '

Is Husk going to sing now to cheer him up? Aww... finally.

' You've lost your way

Ya think your life is wrecked

Well, let me just say,

You're..... correct. '

' Wait what? '

All of you had the same reaction. What the fuck? Wasn't Husk supposed to be comforting him? It did look like it was going that way in the beginning.

' You're a loser, baby,

a loser, goddamn baby

You're a fucked up little whiny bitch

You're a loser just like me. '

"Husk what the fuck are you singing?" Vaggie tried to argue but Husk shushed her. "Shut up, I know what I'm doing."

' But lettin' walls down

It can sometimes set you straight.

We're all living in

The same shit sandwich. '

You knew it. Husk was trying to comfort him in his own way. The song was everything you asked for without knowing.

' We're both losers

Baby we're losers

It's okay to be a. '

' Coked up dick suckin' ho? '

' Baby that's fine by me. '

You didn't miss the way Angel lit up when Husk said he didn't mind the way he was. That he accepted him. And Angel actually felt the same way in the other room. He had a small smile on his face as he cradled the phone close to his chest and watched. At least, he knew he wasn't alone.

' I got no holes left to deflower. '

' I sold my soul to save my power. '

You paused to read the signs a bit. You wondered what 'no balls' signs meant for Husk. He was a cat right. Was he...

' You're a loser, baby '

' A loser, but just maybe if we '

' Eat shit together

things will end up differently. '

You hoped for better future for these two. After this song, you definitely shipped them together. You wanted them to be there for each other and have each others back. The way the danced together was rather adorable as well. Husk knew just the way to cheer Angel up.

Before they could end the song peacefully, it was ruined by the people Husk rescued Angel from. You never saw Husk fight before so it was new seeing this side of him. He had explosive dices? That was cool.

' I told you, I can handle myself Baby. '

With that, Angel brought out all six of his arms and began shooting. You had to admit, that was really attractive of him.

' Cause this guy? Ain't half bad. '

Angel felt his heart pierce beside the other room as he looked at the screen.

' I'm so sorry Angel. I promise I won't ever ever ever ever- '

' Charlie, it's fine. I get it. Thanks for caring about me. '

Angel awkwardly petted Charlie's head as she was squeezing him in a hug. He didn't know how to deal with this situation well, with someone who actually cared, but he tried. Charlie started to cry both in and out the show. Angel picked her up like a cat and gave her to Vaggie.

' Hey, how about that drink? '

' You read my mind. '

And with that, the episode was finally over. As soon as it was, Charlie and you stood up at the same time to look for Angel. Angel slumped down beside Cherri. " What a episode huh? " He sounded rather weak. "Yeah...." Cherri whispered, holding him close now. Before Angel could reply, there were knocks on the door.

" Angel? It's me, (Y/n)... Is it okay I come in?"

Cherri was about to say no for Angel's sake. But Angel stopped her. "I got it toots." He knew he looked shitty. He wiped his eyes and took a few large breaths. He's got this. So what if they saw what happens, as long he can play it cool, it'll be fine.

" Y-yeah, I'm fine. I'll be back in a sec!"

Fuck, he didn't mean for his voice to break in the middle. Hearing that, both you and Charlie felt more helpless. Vaggie and others also followed you two soon. Pentious looked awkward as she rubbed his hands together.

"I...uh, well, tell that spider fellow, uh, Anthony, that if he needs any new gadgets any time. I'll be happy to help! Good night!"

Saying that, he poofed and turned into a snake and slithered away somewhere. Vaggie patted Charlie's head and held her close. Husk stood next to you with a huff. You understood he must be anxious for Angel too just as much as you were.

Husk was leaning on the door. So when Angel finally opened the door, He fell down on his ass with a thud. You were a bit spooked at the suddeness. "..fucking..." As Husk was opening his eyes again, Angel's laughing face came into his view. For a second, he thought he actually saw an angel.... It felt like the whole room's light fell on his face. Suddenly he couldn't handle looking at him as he looked forward.

" Ya okay there kitty cat? "

Angel's voice rang out as he crouched down beside him. "Yeah....but are you...?" He asked awkwardly. "Ye-uff" he got tackled in a bone crushing hug from Charlie crying. You soon joined her and hugged him while also crying. Angel felt trapped, being caged in a hug by two crying woman at once. " A little...help... please..?" He looked at Cherri who was looking at it with a smile.

" Nah, you got it covered." She said while messing up his hair and heading to the kitchen. Angel pouted as he looked at Vaggie. But she also followed Cherri making him sigh. He looked down at the girls. "I'm....okay...you can let go now."

" Angel I promise you when we get back, I'm going to get you out ! Any way possible! I'll talk with my father and-"

"Toots calm down-"

"Angel I promise, if Valentino ever comes here I'm going to squish him like the bug he is!"

"(Y/n) It really isn't necessary.

.

..

...

....

Actually no, do it."

Angel's eyes fell to Husk as he finally stood up and gave him a small smile and a nod. Angel knew how much meant. His smile beamed as well.

Alastor and Niffty were having tea in the kitchen when Angel was finally released from your grasp after a good while later. As soon as Angel stepped into the kitchen, Niffty scurried off from the table and grabbed some cupcakes she baked and practically shoved it in front of his face.

" Here! For you! "

" Uh, thanks Niff... "

" Why don't you join us Angel? Or should I say Anthony now?" Alastor said while sipping his tea. Oh right, his real name was revealed now. " Honestly, I don't mind either of em. Call me what you want, it ain't gonna change who I am. The sexiest motherfucker to ever exist. "

Alastor rolled his eyes at that but soon enough, they engaged in small talk. It was a rare sight to see them both talk so peacefully. But today's episode knocked the wind out of all of the crew. After everyone was fed, everyone proposed to give the single bed to Angel. "What? There's already too many of us. Where's Husk gonna sleep?"

"Eh, don't worry about it. I can turn into a cat and sleep in the corner."

"But-"

No amount of argument was able to sway you guys. All of you made sure he was fully fed till he couldn't anymore. Asked him if he was comfortable and pampered him however you could. He was peacefully tucked into the bed. Angel didn't have to lift a finger.

By 2 am. You all were fast asleep. Everyone slept in the same spot as last night and Husk slept in the corner of your pillow as a cat. It seemed like everything ended well, even after all the commotion.

.

.

.

.

The blue coloured animal was getting impatient and hungry in the pond. Oh so much hungry. There wasn't any fish or anything of the sort it could eat. It tried to go into the land, however it wasn't successful. While it was still able to breathe above water, it didn't necessarily have the limbs it needed to walk on land.

It was determined to catch the first prey it gets. Or it'll have to die starving in this strange world.

A.n: I'm shaking as I post this, lol. Please do remember that I tried my best to be as considerate as possible while writing this chapter. Of course you might think 'oh this character would react more differently ' and it may be true. But what I wrote is what I think they would react like. If you think they'd react differently then you're more then welcome to write about it yourself (⁠•⁠ ⁠▽⁠ ⁠•⁠;⁠)

Also another thing, For people who would like to visualise how Adrian looks, I imagine him to be a combination of Hinata from haikyuu and Childe from genshin impact.

I've been rereading the first few chapters of this book and god there are so many errors. I'll fix them soon but the main things will remain unchanged.

Hope I did a decent enough job in this chapter (⁠^⁠～⁠^⁠;⁠)⁠ゞ

Also Eid Mubarak to all my fellow Muslims out there!!

Tag list: @legostars @glowinthedarkbones1150 @darifes @aria-tempest @rainbowcake1212 @luxylucylou

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

Slave Of Duty: Final Part

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~2.2k

Summary: You're pulled away for a case in the middle of Haley's funeral. Spencer is still mad at you that you didn't let him see you while in prison, but how can you explain to him that whenever you look into a mirror, you hate the person you see? You're far from being okay and Spencer is the kind of comfort you're desperately looking for.

Season Five Masterlist

Warnings: canon violence, canon language, canon talk of death, methods of kill

Author’s Note: I do not own anything from Criminal Minds. All credit goes to their respective owners. If there are any warnings that exceed the normal death/kills from the show, I will list them.

x

After gathering everything you can in Erika's house, your team heads back to the station where you immediately get a strong cup of coffee. No sleep plus that horrifying vision is draining you quicker than you'd like. Emly is watching you like a hawk after what you said to her but you try to ignore the holes she is burning in the back of your head. Derek has the detective and his men looking into the whereabouts of the first three victims and Grant to see where the unsub might have met them.

"There has to be something in the victimology," Derek sighs.

Emily continues to look at you before turning to Derek. "If Grant hadn't come home when he did, Erika would probably still be alive. So, how did the unsub miss him?"

"It says he was out of town last week visiting family in Indianapolis."

"Still, the violence of those kills indicates he knew both victims because the longer the victims are with the killer, the more desperate the attack. The unsub stabbed Erika seventeen times in the face and Grant thirty-four times to the face and genitals."

"It makes sense," Spencer says. "The more he perfects his routine, the more invested he becomes."

"Detective Kaminski, have your men had any luck canvassing the victims' last known whereabouts?" Derek asks.

"None. I'm thinking of pulling them off for the night."

"That's a mistake."

"Why is that? The victims are dead. If he sticks to the pattern, we've got another week before he strikes again."

"He's never gotten this far before. He's desperate to play out his fantasy. A man like this isn't gonna stick to any timetable. He's gonna try to finish this tonight. JJ, we need you on the news to narrow victimology. Let people know that he's out there right now."

"I'm on it," she nods and leaves.

"We still don't know where he's finding his victims," Emily points out.

"We do know that Erika lived in Green Hills. Including the other two areas for the first two victims, we have three points. We have our geographical comfort zone. It's a good bet the unsub lives somewhere In this area, and Erika is our key to figuring out where they met."

JJ comes back into the room with someone on speakerphone.

"Garcia's got something."

"I'm a real genius because this is what I do. I took the travel logs from the GPS systems and overlaid their routes against the geographical profile to reveal what the paper trail could not. While Erika is the only victim who didn't visit a private club, a concert, or go to a fancy restaurant in the days leading up to her death, she did spend a couple of hours at Cheekwood Botanical Gardens on Tuesday."

"Did either of the other victims go to the park?" Spencer asks.

"No."

"I don't know if it's relevant, then."

"It is when her navigation system reads in a straight line. To work, back home, to work, back home. I don't think she ever left her house. She even had her groceries delivered."

"What was she doing on a Tuesday?"

"Let's find out," JJ says.

You need a break from working so you decide to stay back in the station and take a breather. Derek can see you're not doing too well so he allowed you to do that given you work on the geographical profile, which you can do.

You profiled that the unsub recently experienced a loss, possibly from a loved one. What if love wasn't the only loss? You assumed that because the unsub can easily navigate the victim's upscale lifestyle is because he like shared the same financial resources as his victims. What if he learned this behavior as a child and not as an adult? Like he grew up in the rich life instead of doing it as an adult? Maybe he has a rich wife instead?

If he didn't have his own financial independence but was still trying to keep up his social status, he'd be hemorrhaging funds. You've been going about this the wrong way. You've looked at maids, gardeners, pool cleaners, and anyone else who might have had access to the house.

You didn't even bother to look at spouses.

Penelope needs to check employment records at each of the venues the victims visited in the week prior to their death, like for men who are spending beyond their means. This man would have racked up a lot of debt so she needs to look at cars he might have spent money on, clothes, or something that doesn't fit this current income level.

While she did that, Spencer and JJ went to the park to canvas the area. Any normal park attracts a variety of patrons like older couples, walkers, and tour groups. They even host weddings and concerts if the price is right.

Last Tuesday, there was a corporate fundraiser between four and seven at night, which is when Erika was there. The only thing is that someone who wears heels all the time would have a hard time going to something like this, especially if there is a small walk just to get to the heart of the park.

Well, it would be hard if the park didn't have valet parking for high-end clients. Most of the private events hire valets to drive the cars down to the base of the park so clients won't have to hike up and down the hill to get to it.

Whoever took Erika's car tapped into her GPS system since dealerships program the home address into it before the customer leaves the lot. The unsub would not only have the means to get to her house but the keys to get inside.

"Hey, is everything okay with you and Y/N?" JJ asks Spencer once they're done a the park.

Spencer lowers his head and tries not to think about the situation too much.

"I'd rather not talk about it."

"Spence, don't you think you're being a little unfair?"

"What's unfair is her seeing everyone else but me. Can't I get a little space to think?"

Spencer and JJ are silent the entire ride back to the police station. JJ texted you what she and Spencer found out so you're working with Penelope over video chat about it.

"Culpepper Valet Company handled the fund-raiser on Tuesday, and the same company had contracts with the hotel lounge that Bethany frequented and the country club Melissa was a member at."

"That's our connection."

"JJ, get Rossi and Prentiss to talk to the owner," Derek says.

"Right away," she nods and leaves.

"Alright, baby girl, talk to me. I need employee records and a list of venues that Culpepper contracted out to this weekend."

"Sugar, check your email. It hit your inbox sixty seconds ago."

"Thanks, Penelope." He looks at his phone. "It looks like Culpepper was contracted out to three venues this weekend. Two are today. We might be able to catch this guy in action."

"Unless he's with another victim," you say.

Rossi and Emily went to talk to the owner of Culpepper Valet Company so they could see who was working at Cheekwood Park on Tuesday. According to the owner, six men were contracted to that event that day. Based on the profile of the unsub, the owner singled out Joe Belser who broke up with his girlfriend a few weeks ago. They were engaged because he was head over heels in love with her, but she was sleeping with his best man.

Now that you know who the unsub is, you, Spencer, and JJ leave to go to the Vonner Street Lounge where Joe picked up a shift. Emily, Rossi, and Derek are going to go to Joe's apartment with the SWAT team just in case he is there.

"Garcia, did you find anything else on Belser?" JJ asks.

"Okay, he attended Southern Charleston Preparatory Academy on scholarship, his parents died in a boating accident six years ago, and he lost his inheritance in the stock market. Since then, he has been racking up debt faster than he can pay it off. He was engaged to society magazine editor Rose Smith until six weeks ago when it was called off. The chapel was already paid for."

"So, he spent his entire savings trying to live in the world of his fiancee. She was his lifeline only to have her leave him and wind up penniless."

"Garcia, I don't suppose Belser's car has a Lo-Jack system on it, does it?"

"No such luck, Boy Wonder. I need potential victim names."

"We'll get back to you."

There has to be a meaning of the rose petals Joe is leaving behind. When Derek and Emily got to his apartment, they found boxes of universal garage door openers. That's how he's getting into these women's houses. Some people who use valet are smart enough to use a valet key and not their actual car eyes, but no one thinks to take out their car garage door openers.

You, Spencer, and JJ meet with Landon right before talking with a manager at the VIP lounge Joe took a shift for. JJ quickly explained the situation to him but Joe was nowhere to be found. Knowing he might have found another victim, she decides to ask about the people who used the valet service tonight.

"She is a beautiful brunette in her late thirties or early forties. She would have been driving a high-class SUV or Sedan. She only buys high-end."

"VIP?"

"Definitely."

"Let me check the register logs." The manager takes out the paper logs. "This is a list of all of our customers who made charges in our VIP section tonight. They have their own attendant."

"There are fifteen names on here, six of them are women."

You take out your phone and call Penelope who answers immediately.

"Pen, I have six women who used credit cards at the Vonner Street Lounge in the past three hours. Jennifer Ketelson, Kiegan Murphy, Heather Aldridge, Meg Natraj, Ann Herron, and Katie Gotshall."

"Okay, I'm cross-referencing the geographical profile with financial records. Got three names that look good, and one of them is a brunette. Ann Harron. She lives at 431 Pyle Street."

"We got him," you say to your team.

Derek, Rossi, and Emily meet you at Ann's house which is dark. However, you know he's inside. You can feel the panic come from her. You follow Derek and Emily inside with your gun raised, catching Joe in the act of murder. He hasn't killed Ann yet but is in the process of doing so.

"FBI! Get down on the ground!"

Derek and Emily yank Joe away from Ann who Rossi checks on. She is crying and begging for her life but Rossi is taking good care of her. You're standing in the doorway with tears in your eyes. God, you hate crying. You hate it so much, You wish you could never cry again. You've shed so many tears for people who don't deserve it.

Emily pushes Joe to the ground so she can handcuff him.

"Fantasy's over, Joe. Is that what you did to them? You hit them to shut them up? You force them to play along with your sick delusion?"

"I love them," he says desperately.

"You're finally gonna meet your soulmate, Joe. In prison. Only you're not gonna be able to push him around the way you did those women. When he comes for you In the middle of the night, when you're least expecting it, do me a favor. Play along."

She yanks Joe up and has Landon take him away. The paramedics come to check out Ann who you know is going to be alright... physically.

"How is she?" Derek asks.

"She's strong. She'll make it, but you don't survive something like that without scars."

You can feel eyes on you.

"Scars remind us where we've been. They don't have to dictate where we're going."

You can't help but touch your face where your bruise once was. God, this is so suffocating. You want it to stop. You want to pain to go away. Why can't it just go away? A single tear escapes your face that no one but Spencer notices.

Now that you don't have a case to keep you distracted, you're not sure if you can fall asleep. Spencer is still mad at you and sleeping in a bed with someone who is pissed at you is worse than sleeping alone. Spencer has been in bed for twenty minutes waiting for you to come to it when he gets up in search of you.

He finds you in the living room sitting on the small bench by the window.

"Come to bed. We can talk in the morning." Spencer walks closer to you only to realize that you're silently sobbing. "Are you okay?"

"I'm sorry, Spencer," you sob. "I'm sorry I didn't want you to see me. I'm sorry I turned you away. I just didn't want you looking at me with pity. You have such a beautiful mind that won't allow you to forget. I didn't want to see myself like that through your eyes. I wanted to keep some normalcy here. I'm so sorry."

Spencer knows he's being an ass and that stops now. He sits next to you on the bench and pulls you into him.

"I forgive you."

"I'm so scared to go to sleep in fear I'll wake up back in that cell."

"They can't try you again on those murders. You're free, Y/N."

You lift your head and look at Spencer with blurry vision. "No, Spencer, I'm not."

"What lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies within us." - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary​​​​​​ where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[sparring-spirals]

I got to say I really liked the episode (despite only having watched exu calamity of the exu series) and I think maybe Matt needed a breather after so many fast paced, lore filled episodes.

however, I am kinda bummed that the fcg processing has been put on hold for (at least) two weeks now and that means that, despite them being great actors that truly merge with their characters at the table, their reactions will be much less raw and there’s a chance some of them will forget tidbits of information, emotions they felt when it happened because they (as role players) will have had time to process it out of the game and it might create a dissonance in the game. tbf I kind of felt the difference even between the end of ep 91 and the beginning of 92 but it made sense because technically they were still running and couldn’t afford to process. idk. I have hope that we’ll still see that raw emotion, but I fear it won’t be as impactful as it could’ve been, especially if they’ll have to put the “reporting for duty” hat on immediately when they get to the camp

I think being a little bummed about the sort of unexpected hiatus on the Bell's Hells/Post F.C.G processing is super understandable! As someone who also really did enjoy the Crownskeepers return (hello im still yelling about Opal internally), I'm kind of in the same camp of being kind of thrown/disappointed about not getting to really dig into/sit with the Bell's Hells post-F.C.G loss. Like, LOVED the Crownkeepers, fascinating second half, kind of meh on the specific timing.

I'm holding my reservations about whether they're going to have to keep running/moving once we return to their portion of the story, since hey, until it happens (or doesn't!), we don't know, so I don't feel like getting too in my head about it until then.

That said! I do think that in general the cast puts characterization and staying true to the emotions of the character/story as a very high priority within the campaign. I think you're right that it won't be the exact same as if they had done a big emotional blowup/goodbye/processing scene in the same ep where they lost F.C.G, or immediately after. I don't think that means it has to be less impactful, just that- yeah, they'll have had more time to actually think/process it.

But they're also all professional voice actors who have, IMO, thus far shown how much they think about the inner lives of their characters and enjoy really digging deep into the emotional/interpersonal aspects of roleplay.

My assumption (my hope?) is that with additional time to think about + process a devastating/deeply emotional loss for their character(s), they'd choose to lean into that more, and not less. It wont be the same as the immediate raw reactions, thats true! But i dont think that means it has to be less impactful, even if they (as people) have had more time to process, and will be choosing how their characters, fresh off the loss, react. I dont think thats a guarantee it will be less impactful/emotional (maybe the additional thinking would actually enhance the reactions being true/insightful to the characters vs gut reactions from cast), but it will be different.

But if the cast chooses to lean into the heartbreak/emotions, and the circumstances of the BH in the upcoming ep enable it, I'm sure they can still kick my ass (emotionally), timeskip or not.

In general, I'm cautiously optimistic about what could happen next! Even if I don't love the timing thus far. I think there's still plenty of ways for me to get what I'm hoping for wrt F.C.G/BH. :] There are plenty of ways for me to get let down too, probably, but until it happens, or doesn't, I'm opting to not get too doomery about it. We'll see.

I uh. Hope that helps? A bit? Being bummed about specific things you were hoping for being off the table is totally reasonable. just hoping to lend an alternate way of viewing it, if desired.

(i wrote the sentence: "don't be lamenting your chickens before they hatch" and then went "what the fuck" out loud. i spent 4 hours at work today just doing systems diagramming and my brain is fried. clearly. keeping this here for my own entertainment.)

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

So it seems like your requests are open? Cool! I have an idea for COTL! Lamb! Reader is Narinder's chosen vessel rather than the Lamb, and they're EXHAUSTED after everything that's happened. So when Narinder summons them, they say "what if I say "no?"" Narinder just goes, "what?" And they respond "listen, I just died, watched my entire race die, and have been running for my entire life. Can I at least have a break before I get thrown into this?" I just thought it would be funny XD

"Come closer. Fear not, for though you are already dead....I still have need of you."

Standing silently in the white void, you gazed up at the giant feline bishop--a god chained as you, a sacrificial lamb, were now. His arms were stripped to the bone, iron clasps keeping him shackled to the ground and preventing him from freely moving them around too much.

Yet despite him being imprisoned like some caged beast...he seemed no-less revering, and you couldn't help but admire him..

Even if he is the reason you were sent to your death.

Lambs all over the Old Faith were murdered in cold blood, their children snatched and butchered and their villages sieged by the fanatics of the five ruling Bishops. You had been on the run for weeks, without knowing why exactly they targeted your kind specifically.

What did such peaceful wool-covered creatures ever do to deserve this sort of horrible fate?

Only after they have captured you did you realize you were the last living lamb...and that the Bishops put all the others to the blade for one reason:

A prophecy.

A prophecy that spoke of their banished brother--the "One Who Waits"--being freed from his chains by a lamb who'd serve as his vessel and destroy the ways of the Old Faith from the inside out.

For that, the Bishops left none alive in hopes of stopping the prophecy from ever taking place, wanting to ensure the "heretic" stayed in captivity forever.

However after your execution, their plan seemed to have gone awry...considering you, a lamb, stood before the very person they desperately didn't want you to see.

"Those foolish Bishops thought they could keep you from me in death, but instead they sent you straight to me!" Narinder boasted. "I will give you life again, but at a price."

You nervously gulped. "And..what would that be?"

"All I ask is for you to start a cult in my name. Do we have a deal?"

".....what if..I said no?"

"....what?" He narrowed his eyes in confusion, surprised that you didn't readily agree to his offer like other vessels before you. They all jumped at the chance to come back to life..but not you. He began to feel a little insulted.

"Do you take me for a liar, little lamb?" He sneered. "Have you no desire for vengeance against the ones who senselessly destroyed everything you knew and loved? Believe it or not, I can give you that power-"

"I-I absolutely believe you, my lord." You quickly backtracked, kneeling down in respect. "I want that more than anything. It's just...so much has happened all at once. My village burning down, my capture, my death...I haven't known peace until I was sent here. I think..t-taking a small breather first would help me feel better prepared to start a cult in your great name..."

You felt like you rambled a bit too long for his liking, seeing as his stoic expression didn't once waver. Even the smaller cat guardians flanking him hadn't moved an inch, although the one in a white cloak did open his eyes, flashes of concern in them.

Yet Narinder's silence was most discomforting, as you feared that you've angered him and he was going to revoke the offer.

Bowing your head even lower, you squeezed your eyes shut, trembling. "Forgive me, I-I spoke out of turn. I..don't think I'm the right fit to be your vessel-"

However you stopped all movements as you no longer felt the weight of the chains holding you down. And you realized they had disappeared, allowing you to move your arms freely.

Although your neck still ached tremendously...at least the clasp wasn't crushing it anymore.

"No. You are the one I need...for it cannot be anybody else." His voice purred, causing you to look back up at him. This time his gaze seemed softer. "I seldom know what has transpired in the realm of the living..seeing only mere glimpses of certain events. But you've given me better understanding of your tragic circumstances. So I will allow you a brief moment of tranquility to prepare you for your task ahead."

You lightly gasped, smiling as you jumped up into a standing position, hands clasped together in relief. "Oh, thank you so much-!"

"Do not assume I shall always be this charitable." His voice went right back to being condescending. "Take gratitude that I permitted this...and do not ask me for anymore favors henceforth. When you lead a cult, you may not always get "breathers"."

"..I-I understand." You rubbed your neck bashfully. "I appreciate this a lot."

"So I reckon we have a deal? When you're ready, I will guide you on what must be done, and you shall take the Red Crown atop my head to fulfill your mission."

"Very well. I shall gladly serve you and repay the debt I owe."

Narinder blinked, silent for a few long moments, before he grinned wickedly, sharp teeth spreading from ear-to-ear. All three of his eyes seemed to glow brighter.

"Excellent. You understand what must be done and already show such strong devotion to me...you'll be my finest vessel yet."

[avianyuh]

I'll Call You: Jaehyun (Part 3)

Summary: idolreader x jaehyun.

You and Jaehyun have had a secretive on and off again relationship for a few years. After a nasty fight and assumed break-up, you anticipate he'll be back at your door within a few weeks. When word gets back to you that he's been seeing Winter from aespa, you're angry, confused, but mostly hurt. Is Jaehyun done with you or is there more to the story?

Recap: After finding out Jaehyun had moved on, he tries to contact you, acting like he had nothing to hide. More importantly, he acted like he had nothing to explain. Will you hear him out? Or is it time for you to treat him the way he has always treated you?

Part(s):

- 1

-2

-3

The next morning was a bad one. I opened my eyes and was greeted by a sleeping Yura to my left. She had stayed with me the whole night. There were a lot of tears, but as the night went on, I decided that I would feel better if I just fessed up and told her everything about Jaehyun and I.

I started from the beginning about how we met, which was backstage at a music show. I had been walking down a hallway, preoccupied, looking at the walls of the accomplished artists that decorated the walls as I myself was nervously anticipating my group's performance. I had told my group I needed to take a breather so I wanted to take a walk. Jaehyun had been coming the other way and was staring at his phone. We ended up crashing into each other. Luckily he didn't drop his phone and no one was hurt. He immediately helped me up and started apologizing profusely. I was embarrassed but I reassured him that it was an honest mistake. But then we started talking and he said he had heard of my group and even started to sing one of our songs, which actually took my mind off of the performance for a minute. I didn't think I would have a chance to talk to him again after we said our goodbyes, but by the end of the show, a number was slipped into my bag when I went to collect my things. It didn't have a name on it but I had my suspicions it was him.

It was true because when I sent a simple 'Hello' text to the number, I was met with a 'Are you sure you're okay after that fall?'.

And that's where the relationship started.

We had texted for weeks, which developed into long phone calls, the meeting in person. I couldn't deny the fact that he was insanely attractive. He was charming, charismatic and kind. All of that was proven just in the first day of meeting him. I didn't understand what he could have possibly seen in me?

Our first kiss was after he had dropped me off at my dorm. It was really cliche. Up until that point, there had been no talks of a relationship and we had just viewed each other as close friends. But when we stood in front of my door, he held my chin in his hand and leaned in. Before I knew it I was leaning against the door and wrapped my arms around him. When he pulled away he whispered, "I don't think we can be friends anymore", with a smug smile on his face. I nodded, staring into his eyes.

We hadn't started any relationship talks that night. It wasn't until a week later that I saw him again. Though I'd like to preface that we had been texting the whole week.

But when he came over to my dorm and sat on my bed, next to my side, I could tell that something had changed.

He didn't seem as attentive as the night of the kiss. When I had greeted him at the door all he did was give me a brief hug before walking in and heading straight for my room.

And that was when he said it. That he wasn't ready for a relationship, but he didn't want to be friends.

And for a moment I thought that he would say we shouldn't see each other anymore. Which would have crushed me.

But when I over at him in confusion, he started to elaborate.

"I think that we should just see each other. No one else. But you know, I'll call you when I have time and you'll do the same. But we not dating or anything. No expectations, no time commitments." , he finished explaining and seemed pretty content with the idea.

I on the other hand felt like crawling in a ditch and burying myself. He didn't want to date me. He wanted to sleep with me, mess with my emotions, make me fall for him, but I couldn't call him my boyfriend.

Part of me thought that it would be a bad idea. But the other part of me didn't want to lose him, and could see that not committing could be an easier thing to hide from the public. Which would be wiser for both of our careers. The sad part was...I felt like it was all or nothing. If I didn't agree with this, he would probably leave.

So, I caved. I said I'd be willing to try and that's what we did for three years. But just like I predicted, I fell for him. I felt like a fool now knowing that he had replaced me. That he had moved on so fast. That he had been a lot more outgoing with information in this new relationship than he had even been with me. I think that's what hurt the most.

When I had finished telling Yura, she told me that everything was for the best. That I would heal. But that I shouldn't even think about taking him back if that ever became a possibility. I knew she was right, so I nodded in agreement.

But when I woke up the next morning after my mock therapy session, I was greeted by a text.

10 minutes ago: 'Can we talk?'

I didn't even have to look at the name to know who it was from.

So I picked up my phone and angrily tapped on my keyboard, I wanted him out of my life.

'There's nothing to talk about."

I was surprised by the text I received back.

'I just want to see you and apologize. I was a massive dick.'

True, I thought, but a little too late. He waited almost a month to contact you, for a shitty apology of all things? Had he texted me back within the first few days of the fight, sure, I would've heard him out. But to wait this long and learn he's been seeing someone else for half of that time...fuck no.

So, I decided to take the more blunt approach.

'Oh? I see that your new girlfriend has made you a better person, I don't want to talk to you. Leave me ALONE.'

He took a few minutes to respond, but all he did was make me angrier.

'What are you talking about? I don't have a girlfriend, the only person I'm seeing is you.'

All I sent back was 'Bullshit'. I couldn't believe he would play dumb. What's the point of an apology if you're not going to be honest...My train of thought was cut off when I heard my phone vibrate again. I looked down and read his last message: 'I really need to talk to you'

And to that I blocked him. I'm done. I don't think he can ever make it up to me. Three years of mind games, and he still can't be honest with me.

I felt the tears welling up again. I let out a sniffle, which woke Yura up. She sat up and pulled me into a hug. She didn't even ask why I was crying, but I think she already knew the reason.

I told her what happened, but as she was reading through the text messages, we heard the buzzer go off.

We could hear one of the girls go over to the intercom and look at the camera. Then we heard her make her way down the hallway before she stopped at my door.

"Jaehyun's here", she said. "Should I tell him to go?"

Yura spoke up immediately, "Yes, she doesn't want to hear what he has to say.", but when I thought about it. The fact that he came over in the first place, at least I could get some closure, face to face.

"No", I said as I stood up, "I want to talk to him.", Yura looked at me, disappointment evident on her face. "Yura, I need to get closure. Three years of on and off. I just want an explanation."

I quickly changed and splashed my face with cold water to help with my puffy face, caused by all of the crying, and I headed towards the front door.

~~~

{A/N: One more part to go! Might be from Y/N's perspective again. I have really enjoyed writing this little story so I'll probably start preparations for a new one, so if you have anyone in mind please let me know.}

[ask-zaukodar]

This is a little bit of a vent piece about Helldivers 2 and the people I most regularly play with, if y'all want to move on then you can. If you want to read then click on.

Helldivers 2 has been a rollercoaster ride of a game for me with lots of ups and downs. I have a group I play with that are largely competent and fun to be around, even though we don't agree on certain topics. I won't go into those here because it's not relevant, except to say that sometimes some asshole-ness arises.

This past week has been very hard for me, and I imagine it was hard for virtually everyone else that still has some kind of soul. I've been feeling particularly isolated as I am in the dual positions of trying to be there for friends while also having nobody to be there for me. Come Saturday night I realize I want to not feel alone, and I see my friends playing and decide to pop in to join them. I join in, we combine arms, we have a great time, we even do an eradicate mission against the Automotons where we all brought nothing but "saturate the area in explosives and fire" stratagems. It was entertaining!

Then we got back to "regular" missions and everyone is choosing their loadouts. By my own admission my favorite squad booster is the UAV Recon, because my play style leans into "find a clear route to go to the objective without bumping into everything" so it tends to be my default option unless I immediately recognize there's no use for it (ie, eradicate missions).

Now, we're on a snow planet, which means our sprinting is going to be less effective, which means that technically UAV Recon isn't the most useful option here. It didn't click at first because of how tired I was and generally going auto-pilot on my loadout. I wouldn't have faulted someone for pointing that out and asking I switch if they were being kind and specific about it.

Here comes the actual vent: the one friend, who is most vocal and tends to become the most asshole-ish, "asked" me to not take UAV Recon with a semi-forceful tone and justified his demand because:

it was a selfish pick

that with the other radar boosting options I already have (recon armor and radar upgrade) I should already have "plenty" of radar coverage

stamina is just "better" than other options

in so many words except the ones he meant that I was playing the game wrong by choosing it

The irony of him in particular making this impassioned speech (that was supposed to be a simple request) was that he himself has his own squad booster preference: Experimental Infusion. Since the day that booster came out he has never chosen another one no matter what else the squad chooses or stands in need of, so his already unmoving argument was underscored by his own habits.

I had to physically step back and go into Thinking Mode™, which is just saying I needed to take a breather before I said something I'd regret, because being tired and frustrated I was doing everything I could to not take it personally. I eventually worked up the ability to ask if he could take Muscle Enhancement if I took Stamina Enhancement. To his credit, he did, but not before saying "I don't like not taking the stims" which made me roll my eyes a little. But he compromised, so I compromised, and I left it at that for the mission. He did switch back to Experimental Infusion the next mission, but I was tired enough to just not push it and not wanting to get quasi-yelled at again.

This shouldn't be that big of a deal, but it's not sat right with me since it happened. I don't enjoy being shoehorned into taking things I don't want because everyone expects me to take it after they take what they want. I don't like playing games trying to find the most min-maxed meta options because I like having the room to take something I like or can be comfortable with. I like winning, but I also like having fun. And it's just felt like nobody else is expected to do differently except me.

At the end of the day if this is a one-off then I just needed to vent to get it out of my system and not let myself stew in it. But if this happens again or becomes part of a trend then God help me, because it's going to quickly become an issue. Not an issue of "how should I play the game differently" but "should I be playing with this guy at all" or even "should I stop playing this game altogether." And in a time when I feel isolated and alone I absolutely don't want to have to cross that bridge.

[cru5h-cascades]

(folks who followed me for Serafina series crap y'all might want to read this!)

Bridge to Terabithia.

So I had to read this book for 6th grade and I vividly remember what's up with this book (probaly because I frequently watch the movie but also because the unit we had for the book was interesting, especially towards the end of the unit!). I have LOTS of thoughts about this book, especially for the last parts of it, and the movie adaption from 2007.

Yup. This is another semi book rant.

First off, the positives. I liked this book as a kid. Not because I related to it, but because of the events of the book and how the kids in my grade reacted to Leslie's death. Personally, I kind of saw it coming. If I recall correctly, I think I might've figured it out by reading the back of my copy of the book somehow (it was the 40th anniversay edition copy, like the one pictured above). The day after I read the part where Leslie died, I blabbed this to some of my fellow classmates because I was so suprised I was right (I suprisingly have a good track record when it comes to predicting stuff in books I have to read in class!) and then soon enough My entire 6th grade class found out about the death of this fictional girl we were reading about. It was just interesting to see the story unfold! Like at one moment it's pretty nice, you know kids just usin' their imagination and finding creative ways to survive school as social outcasts but then BAM one of them dies and the other kid just kind of loses himself I guess.

With the book's sequence of events comes my gripes with the book. Case in point: how Jess goes on living after Leslie's death. Here's some stuff that Jess does after Leslie dies.

Blaming his teacher who took him to a field trip outside of school hours (more on that in a bit because I got stuff about to say about that) for Leslie's death because she never asked if Jess wanted to bring Leslie DESPITE THE FACT Jess did think about bringing Leslie with them but never said anything.

Punching a kid because he was mocking him about his friend dying.

Dump the art supplied Leslie gave him into the river she drowned in (without any concern for the local wildlife and marine life, might I add)

All of this presumably over a short amount of time and once he makes the bridge he's all a-okay??? BRO IF YOU'RE ACTING LIKE THIS CLEARLY YOU'RE NOT OKAY. I vividly remember this from 6th grade but we had what my 6th grade teacher called a socratic semenar about if the way Jess is coping with this loss is okay or not.

Unanimously, we all agreed that kid needs help. Ain't no way a bridge can solve your problems, lil' man.

Now, it isn't specified how long it's been from Leslie's death to the end of the book. But nowhere is it specified that Jess got some time off school to process all of this or anything like that and the movie doesn't do anything to clarify that, which leads me to assume that all of this happens over the course of a week or so. Give the kid a breather. My. God.

The 2007 movie isn't any better, either.

Same story beats. The bridge fixes everything for Jess again. My. God.

I haven't re-read the book recently, but for some reason I think Jess' dad is a bit more of a dick in the flick? I dunno. Hell, maybe some of this post is me confusing some stuff from the movie for stuff that came from the book. But damn. The oppertunity to fix the book's weaker points was right there but nah.

If there's another adaptation of Bridge to Terabithia in the future, I hope that it shows Jess really recovering from Leslie's death. Make it clear how long it is between Leslie's death and the end of the story. Let Jess get help. Something. Just handle the effects of how the death of a friend might affect a child better. Actually show the healing process and don't resolve everything by having Jess build the bridge. Build up to that point. Jess' previous negative coping mechanisims can stay but at least show some positive ones afterwards. Show him growing as a person.

So that's my lil rant about Bridge to Terabithia and how it handles mental health. These are just my opinions, so take it easy on me. If I ever make that post about the Spiderwick Chronicles I promise it's not gonna be a rant 'cause I loved those books (at least the og ones, anyways) and I don't have a lot of negative stuff to say about them (again, at least the og books).

[stark-at-heart]

Untitled, a Love Story

Part Three

O Captain! My Captain! our fearful trip is done;

The ship has weather'd every rack, the prize we sought is won;

The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,

While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring:

      But O heart! heart! heart!

            O the bleeding drops of red,

Where on the deck my Captain lies,

                        Fallen cold and dead.

O Captain! My Captain! rise up and hear the bells;

Rise up—for you the flag is flung—for you the bugle trills;

For you bouquets and ribbon'd wreaths—for you the shores a-crowding;

For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;

      Here captain! dear father!

            This arm beneath your head;

It is some dream that on the deck,

                        You've fallen cold and dead.

My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still;

My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will;

The ship is anchor'd safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;

From fearful trip, the victor ship, comes in with object won;

      Exult, O shores, and ring, O bells!

            But I, with mournful tread,

                  Walk the deck my captain lies,

Fallen cold and dead.

- O Captain! My Captain! By Walt Whitman

February, 1990

It was the end of Tony’s reading week. She had spent the entire time entombed in the workshop, working furiously on her nanotech project. She had indeed had a breakthrough, one that she was pretty certain was going to lead to all kinds of new possibilities that she was now just itching to play with—but, even geniuses needed to take a break sometimes, and after a coffee-fueled week in the basement living on a total of about four hours of sleep every two days, Tony Stark was ready to take a breather.

Of course, she was taking that breather at 3am on a Saturday, drinking yet more coffee because that was what brought her joy in life, but to each their own. She sat in the kitchen, at the little family table that was there ostensibly for Jarvis, Ana, and other ‘servants’ but which Tony preferred entirely over the much larger one in the dining hall. Eventually Tony figured she would relocate to her room and play Galaga on her Atari until the sun came up before inevitably conking out for three more hours, but those plans got derailed when buff, blonde, and baffled wandered into the kitchen making a bee line for the water glasses and looking about as sleep deprived as Tony actually was.

“Hey,” Tony said, although she didn’t know why she’d bothered. He hadn’t noticed her, and if that trend continued she could have easily slipped out without having to make small talk at three in the morning. But something had compelled her to speak. Maybe it was how out of place ‘tired’ looked on an actual super human. Maybe it was just how far away his gaze was even as he filled up his water glass. Or maybe it was the fact that he went for the water automatically, mechanically, like he’d done this dozens upon dozens of times before, despite having only been in this house—and this time period—for a couple of weeks. Hell, Tony didn’t know. But she knew as soon as the super soldier turned that haunted, sunken gaze to her that she couldn’t leave him alone until that eased up, at least.

“Oh,” he said, the tired gaze taking on some degree of startled. “I didn’t think anyone would be here.”

“Well, you know,” Tony said, “someone exposed me to water and fed me after midnight, so here I am, causing trouble. Drinking all the coffee.” At the Captain’s blank look she recalled that there was no way in hell he knew what a Gremlin was and her usual brand of humor was rendered nearly useless, which was a crime. “Never mind, Capsicle. You couldn’t sleep?”

The Captain still stood at the sink. His water glass was full, and he hadn’t drunk any of it. He shrugged at her and this somehow looked helpless. Tony wasn’t sure how that was possible, given that he was, again, a literal superhuman, but it did.

“I don’t need much sleep, anymore,” he said. “Besides—I slept for forty-five years. I think I’m good on sleep, for now.”

Now, Tony was the queen of avoiding subjects and questions. She was a master evader. She had won awards in the art of misdirecting and distracting until whatever godawful paparazzi or so called journalist forgot entirely what they had been asking her about. So she knew a brush off when she heard one. He definitely couldn’t sleep.

Well he did just come back from a war. And also death, Tony thought to herself. It wasn’t her problem. It wasn’t her problem! This was one hundred percent her father’s mess. If he was going to go around resurrecting his old war buddies, then he should be the one to have to figure out how to help them live with all the shit they were faced with as consequence.

But, here was the thing. It was three in the morning on a Saturday. Her father was probably passed out drunk somewhere. At the very least, he was not in the kitchen with the clearly distraught, newly resurrected super soldier, which meant that he was in no position to help.

It really wasn’t Tony’s problem, but…

“IHOP,” she said, standing up abruptly. The super soldier blinked at her slowly.

“I… what?”

“IHOP. It’s an acronym. International House of Pancakes. What the hell about it is supposedly international, I have no fucking idea so don’t ask me. What I do know, however, is that IHOP is open even at three in the morning. They have terrible coffee and middling pancakes and we should absolutely go get some of both,” Tony declared.

“We… should?” the Captain asked, clearly not quite catching up to the program.

“Yep,” was all she said. “Follow me, your carriage awaits.”

She half expected him to stay where he was as she walked out of the kitchen, but in two strides he was just a half step behind her, peering at her curiously. Tony pretended not to notice as she led him out to the garage.

“What do you think, the Ferrari? I like the Ferrari,” Tony said absently, looking out at the six cars in the garage. She glanced at the Captain, but he looked vaguely stunned and Tony wondered if he hadn’t been in the garage at all in the three weeks since he’d been there. That seemed a shame to her, because even in her vague recollections of her father’s many stories about Captain America, it came across that he was a fan of motorcycles. They didn’t have any bikes at the moment, but that could be arranged; and in the mean time, a man who appreciated a good bike was likely also a man who would appreciate the assortment of luxury and classic cars her father kept.

Not your problem, Tony. Mentally shaking herself, she went for the driver’s seat of the red Ferrari. It was so flashy it was nearly gaudy, and she hopped right in and stared at the Captain with a raised eyebrow until he joined her.

“Hold onto your hat,” Tony said. “Or your cowl. Whatever.” And she tore out of that garage with all the enthusiasm a Ferrari warranted. 

The nearest IHOP on Long Island was not an exciting enough locale to take a Ferrari, really, but Tony pulled into the parking lot and flung open her door like she was royalty. She waited for the Captain to very carefully leave the car and very gently shut the door. She slammed her side and marched into the place, commandeering a booth for the two of them as the Captain followed her, clearly no less baffled. When the waitress came over Tony just took out two hundred dollar bills and handed them to her.

“One of all the pancakes that seem vaguely dessert-y, an entire pot of coffee with two mugs, and anything else he wants,” Tony told her. She looked at the overwhelmed Captain. “It’s a breakfast place. What do you like for breakfast? Eggs? Sausage? Bacon? Your metabolism has to be insane.”

“Um,” the Captain said, and Tony just looked back at the waiter.

“One of all those, too. Extra eggs. Like, enough eggs to feed this man. Whatever you think would work. He looks like a body builder right? So just base it off that,” Tony instructed. The waitress, who was probably Tony’s age, seemed just as dumbfounded as the Captain, but she took the bills and nodded, then scurried back towards the kitchen. She was prompt with the coffee, which Tony appreciated as she proceeded to guzzle her first entire mug before the Captain had even thought to pour his out. She poured a mug for him and then her second. She shoved it towards him.

“It’ll warm you up,” she told him, because his alternating lost and baffled expressions were really getting to her. Fortunately, this seemed to be just the right thing to say. He took the mug and took a sip. He frowned. “What?”

“Pretty sure I’ve had better coffee on the front lines,” he drawled. She stared at him. He stared back.

“Oh my god did you actually crack a joke?” she asked. “You must be exhausted. Jesus. So, how long have you gone without sleep, O Captain, my Captain?” He raised a single eyebrow at her and sipped his coffee.

“You know,” he said slowly, “the Captain’s dead, right?”

“What?” Tony felt a sudden stab of icy panic, because she was not ready to deal with some full on super soldier identity crisis or something here in the IHOP at three-thirty in the morning, she was absolutely not equipped—

“The poem. O Captain! My Captain! The Captain is dead,” the Captain said, and suddenly Tony’s world righted itself and she had no need to spiral into a panic anymore, which was fortunate because that would have really thrown a wrench in her morning.

“You know Walt Whitman?” Tony asked as the waitress returned, bringing maybe half of their order and putting it all over the table in a haphazard sort of fashion that Tony appreciated. She grabbed the nearest stack of pancakes—New York Cheesecake pancakes, she was pretty sure after a bite. She’d been referencing Dead Poets Society, which had been a hit last summer, but of course she knew the poem, too. She was just surprised he did. The Captain gave her a look that clearly said he was judging her hard. “What?”

“Of course I know Walt Whitman,” he said.

“Huh. I just figured, I dunno, you were like dirt poor and living in Brooklyn in the twenties and thirties—sounded like a recipe for ‘dropped out in the eighth grade’ to me, never mind all the uh, ailments?”

Ok, yeah the Captain was definitely judging her hard. But he was also reaching for the blueberry pancakes, so he probably wasn’t pissed off, at least.

“My mother was a nurse. Education was important. I graduated high school. Even went to Auburndale for a year after, but I couldn’t afford tuition for the full program,” he explained. He sounded a little wistful, almost. Or maybe Tony was reading too much into it. “Still, I learned enough to get jobs drawing illustrations, posters, all that. I got a job with Timely right before the war—they did all the Captain America comics after I enlisted. That was a little surreal, I won’t lie.”

“I would think your entire life from the point you enlisted was surreal,” Tony said. “I mean, like, if Dad’s stories are real then… they turned you into a superhuman and then you went to fight like, crazy super-evil super-nazis who had way advanced weapons powered by some ancient Norse energy source? And now you’ve been like, raised from the dead so there’s that.”

“Yeah,” the Captain said, then got all quiet again, staring at the sausages before him. Aw fuck. She’d fucked it up again. She was good at that.

“So—art school. You want to go back?” Tony asked. The Captain blinked, a few times, as though this was a brand new consideration for him. Hell, maybe it was. What did Tony know.

“I—have no idea,” he said. “I don’t… I figure, the military will probably want me… doing military things.”

“Do you want to do military things?” Tony asked, even though it was none of her business and definitely not her problem. Her whole brain was screaming at her to just finish up the damn pancakes, pack like twenty doggy bags, take them back to the manor and leave the dinosaur to his own devices. But there was the tiniest, most stubborn part of her, that would not listen to the reasonable rest of her brain. “Because when you were in it, I mean, you were fighting Nazis. Maybe it wasn’t at the time but that seems like, the most black and white good guys versus bad guys fight ever. But the military now is like, shady as fuck. You should probably know that before you sign your life away—again.” The Captain stared at her for a long moment, and for a second Tony wondered if he was all there or if he was off having flashbacks or something but finally he said,

“Stark Industries is mainly a weapons contractor with the US military. And you—weren’t you just working on a contract yourself? ‘Nanotech’, you said?” Tony stabbed her pancakes and shrugged.

“I’m a Stark, we operate in the morally gray. Military funding gets shit done. Profits made from those projects help with other ones. Nanotech has about a quadrillion other applications that aren’t military. Besides, I’m just a division of R&D for SI. SI gets the contracts, I figure out some solution. I don’t pick the contracts,” Tony said. If some of the projects she’d worked on made her feel vaguely uncomfortable, well, what the hell did it really matter. Her duty was to SI, at the end of the day. She quashed her feelings on the subject all the time. Feelings were a weakness when it came to business. The Captain frowned at her, deeply, looking both contemplative and disapproving, but Tony figured that was going to be par for the course for a lot of their interactions and elected to ignore it. He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it. He shook his head once, and asked,

“You think… they’ll just let me go?”

“Fuck, Capsicle, you died in service. Pretty sure whatever contract you had with the military is like, way expired,” Tony said with an arched eyebrow. She drained her second mug of coffee. “And like. Yeah the military is shady but they’re not about to enslave you. And Dad would throw an entire army of lawyers at them if they tried to just like, redact you as a human.”

The Captain was quiet for a long moment. Tony finished off her New York cheesecake pancakes and moved over to the ones that were clearly chocolate chip.

“Steve,” he said softly.

“Huh?”

“Steve. My name is Steve, not Captain or Capsicle or any of that,” he said. “You can use my name.”

It wasn’t like the typical friendly, ‘Call me Steve’ that someone might pull out after being called Mr. So and So one too many times. It wasn’t an invitation, Tony knew that. It was a plea. And Tony, well, she was selfish, sure, a smartass, always, and bitchy, of course. But never cruel. And she got the impression in that moment that it would be cruel, for some reason, not to use his name.

“All right,” she said lightly, “Steve. Fair enough, I did ban you from calling me ma’am. What about your full name? Steven? Anybody call you that ever? Oh that’s a face, all right, ixnay on the Steven-ay. Well, I should probably warn you then also that my full name is off limits.”

“What is your full name? Antonia?” Steve guessed. Tony grimaced.

“Do you think my mother has no taste? God, no. Antonella. And if you ever use it I’ll—”

“Kick me in the balls?” Steve asked, and there was the tiniest, most hesitant of smiles on his face, and for a second that stole Tony’s breath away, that little smile all focused on her.

Oh, fuck. 

“Remove them wholesale,” Tony corrected him. “Punishment has to match the crime, see.” The Cap—Steve chuckled.

“Noted,” he said.

Not your problem. Not your problem. Not your problem, Tony chanted to herself over and over again as their conversation continued to be pleasant and about nothing in particular. Not only was he not her problem, really, he was someone she ought to actively avoid. Nothing good ever came of interacting with her dad’s projects, or her dad’s past. But there were moments, when he smiled, that Tony knew she would abandon all reason to make him smile again.

And whether or not she was ready to admit it to herself, many years later at least Tony could acknowledge that it was during that pancake breakfast that she was well and truly fucked.

[snowdust64]

Ouma Great War Chronicles - Episode 8: It Would Be a Lie to Say I Don’t Feel Bitter

Narrator:  One week has passed since Nagao, Kaida, and Genzuki failed to capture the culprit who was setting up the Treasure Chests of Lunacy. At the Bureau Cafeteria, in the middle of their conversation, Kaida made an offhand comment.

scene:  Bureau Cafeteria

Kaida:  Now that you mention it, it does look like no more incidents of mad transformations have happened since then.

Nagao:  Yeah. But… No way we can call it case closed with this.

Kaida:  That’s the thing. We couldn’t catch the culprit setting up the Treasure Chests of Lunacy, so even now, he’s on the loose, and we haven’t come up with any fundamental solution either.

Genzuki:  The investigation needs to make progress before the incidents start happening again… Hah. I wasn’t expecting a straightforward resolution, but it looks like we’ll be wrapped up in this case for a long time.

Nagao:  Well, as much as it makes our heads hurt, that’s not gonna change. Let’s just each do what we can. Right now anyway, that’ll be eating as much as we can eat. Can’t get anything done on an empty stomach, isn’t that the saying?

Kaida:  You’re just using it self-servingly though. If you eat so much, maybe when you’re battling with demons, you won’t be able to move around properly, you know?

Nagao:  It’s fine. If I eat, just having eaten will let me move. That’s how I’m built!

Genzuki:  Haha… The same amount as Kei-kun would be impossible for me, but I’ll try to eat a lot too. One way or another, what we eat will turn into energy.

Kaida:  Genzuki, you too? … Well, you are right.

Nagao:  Alright. Then, how about the three of us compete to see who can eat the most!

Genzuki+Kaida:  Not gonna.

scene change:  Nagao’s Workroom

 Nagao:  Hah… I went around to check locations where it seemed like more Cases of Demon Madness might happen, but that ended fruitlessly. (Has the culprit completely stopped his activities, or is he being deliberately cautious now that he knows we’re sniffing around on the case? I can’t pick out even a trace of suspicious information. Haru and Toujirou are continuing their own investigations too, but they’re in the same situation as me…) What can we even do? But that said, if we fare badly against demons’ attacks again, it’ll be more troubling. (Moreover… That man who is setting up the Treasure Chests of Lunacy… To think there was someone of that skill within the Ouma Empire. I thought if it was the three of us, we could have lasted a little longer in a fight no matter what kind of adversary we faced. And yet, in reality, we were helpless. It would be a lie to say I don’t feel bitter over something like that!) (We’ll definitely re-challenge. To that end, first, I have to give even more time to training!)

scene change:  Bureau Research Deparment

Kaida:  Uhhhm… To counter the effects that the Treasure Chest of Lunacy has on demons, I need to incorporate something with the opposite effect, but… Plan A and Plan B are both impossible. For Plan C, if the material could be obtained…? Nah. Just the act of finding such a useful material would be praiseworthy in itself… Which means Plan C is also impossible. I need to think of some other alternative, but… nothing is coming to mind anymore. Ah, geez! Throwing my hands up! I admit defeat!

Hinata:  Ahaha… Kaida-senpai, please calm down. I’ve brought some tea! Since you’re been thinking this through this whole time, take a breather.

Kaida:  Ah… thanks, Hinata. Itadakimasu – Ah, so warm…

Hinata:  Heheh, looks like you’ve calmed down a bit, thank goodness. But, I can see the development of that tool you mentioned is running into difficulties. Umm, what name did you call it again?

Kaida:  It’s the Soul-Resting Flute. *

Hinata:  That’s right that’s right! Heheh, it’s a cool name isn’t it. Plus, being able to pacify demons, what an amazing tool!

Kaida:  Mn. If we can accomplish this much, then even if the Cases of Demon Madness start happening again, dealing with them should become easier. But it’s not a simple task to carry this out… Somehow, I’m doubting more and more that I have talent after all. My confidence is disappearing.

Hinata:  No way! Kaida-senpai having no talent, that’s unthinkable! Whatever anyone may say, you’re a genius and also a hard worker, a truly amazing person!

Kaida:  Ah, ahaha… Thank you. (Expectations to this degree do hold some pressure… but I’d like to answer those expectations. For the empire’s sake as well, I must not run away from developing this. However… It’s also a fact that I’ve hit a ceiling with ideas.) Hmm, what to do about this… (What if, with only our current understanding about it, it’s not even possible to create the Soul-Resting Flute…? In that case ─ )

scene change:  Genzuki’s Workroom

Nikaido:  Hah, you’re still doing those sorts of things. How about you start by looking up the meaning of the word ‘efficiency’ in a dictionary?

Genzuki:  … Nikaido-kun…

==========

Translation notes

*  鎮魂 (chinkon) can refer to calming souls of the living or to serenading souls of the dead, as in a requiem. “Soul-Resting” accommodates either meaning and so that’s what I chose.

[pxepoety]

Title: Where are my friends?

November '21

The first time I self harmed without realizing it, I came one of my best friends that I met earlier that school year. She couldn't handle me that way because it was so out of my character to her, and said that maybe I should just take a day off from socializing or else I will be overwhelming to others (mainly her, possibly a tip for myself, who knows). A breather is what she said works for her, and that I should try it. Great, but I knew I needed a friend, some sanction, not a breather. How can I tell someone who feels they can't share and handle my pain, that that's what I needed? Am I scaring them away? Lacking social intelligence and social cues about when, where, and how to be a person?

August '22

Fast forward a year, and an expensive traumatic experience happened to me. Lost and scared and alone, I came to another friend who at the time I believe I fell in love with; in love with an idea of her, but she actually studied abroad for the majority of my infatuation. Or maybe that love was real because of the way she saw and treated me last year before her abroad-- she treated me as a real person.

Rushed by emotions, I impulsively trauma-dumped to her via text. I tried and tried to talk to her in person about it many times, but she was unavailable, so a text was my last resort before anything bad could've happened to me. I cried in between the lines of the texts,

please! Reach for me! I'm calling for help! I'm in pain and I need someone!"

But she couldn't read that. Instead, she cried at how overwhelming I am. Fuck. I did it again. I knew trauma dumping the story I gave her out of nowhere was inappropriate and unattractive, and I'm sorry. I broke my character because I wanted a friend to see me as the real me: lost, in pain, and lonely. She told me she believes she's not the right person I should be telling this kind of stuff to. Ouch, because I thought of only you when I was going through my troubles. She told me that maybe I needed friends, like quality friends. Maybe, like you? I thought.

I screamed inside my head, behind my tears that were falling in front of her. We sat in silence for a couple minutes for the rest of the conversation before I took her back to campus with a "start over?" Handshake. Great.

Reflection: January '23

I feel sorry that I've distanced myself from the first friend a bit to this day, but that's what she asked for, right? We don't hang out as often around school, only regressed to waves around campus and once a week lunches at the dining hall to catch up. Our school schedules are different this year so we logistically can't see each other as often as last year anyways, but is that really a proper excuse? Because of what she told me back in November, I don't think I can face her as close of a person as I could back then anymore. She told me she can't handle people like the real me, so I'm doing her a favor I tell myself.

I feel sorry for my friend who learned too much about me. Our relationship was heading somewhere totally different; a road that for now I can only dream of. Instead, I had to relearn a lesson. Maybe self sabotaging a second time is what it takes to truly learn something about yourself.

I learned that I don't have friends. I learned that I miss you. I learned that I miss myself, and who I was before all of this. I miss you *** & ******.

[wild-aloof-rebel]

how are we feeling about this michael short ep after a quadruple dose of david west read? as much as i loved the plotlines, i feel like any and/or all of the three deserved some more complexity with interpersonal relationships, especially at this point in the season

this is one of those episodes that i feel like i have a hard time judging until i see where the rest of the season goes. it certainly wasn’t my favorite episode of the season so far, but that’s fine–not all of them can be.

in some ways it was nice to have a sort of breather after the heavier emotions of last week’s episode. but at the same time, yeah, at the end of the episode i was kind of left wanting something a little more substantial. but i think some of that certainly comes from not knowing if or how some of the pieces here fit into the larger arc. i think the alexis stuff is the most obvious in how it fits into her finding her place post-ted (and thanks to the conversation with johnny, that plotline definitely was the one with the most weight and thus emotional payoff at the end of it). but i had a harder time figuring out if the stuff with david and patrick and even the stuff with moira really is going to affect where they’re headed in the rest of the season or not. it’s one of those things where we’re going to just have to wait and see. i can think of ways that both plotlines are potentially important to things to come, but whether or not that’s ultimately gonna be true, who knows?

it’s interesting too because i think that we as an audience are putting a different kind of pressure and level of expectation on this season than there has been for past seasons, where we want every single scene to “count”–which makes sense because we have a limited amount of time left with the show and don’t want them to waste a minute of it on things that don’t seem to matter. but the previous seasons aren’t built exactly that way either. some episodes of each season have lots of important things that happen–open mic for instance obviously serves as a milestone for david and patrick’s relationship AND we get motel becoming the rosebud motel. and some episodes, none of the plots are terribly important to the overall arcs of the show. take roadkill, which is positioned similarly in s5 and also written by michael short. none of those three plots come back around in any way later on–ted and alexis breaking the sink doesn’t ultimately matter. there’s no further consequence to moira and johnny’s part of the story. wendy and antonio are never mentioned again. etc. but even though the plots don’t come back, they do still help to build toward where the characters end up at the end of the season. we get alexis and ted’s relationship growth, and david’s pride in the life and work he’s built with patrick (and our first bits of foreshadowing of the engagement), and moira’s continued dissatisfaction with life in sc. so even though the plots are almost entirely irrelevant to the overall season arcs, the characterization in them is not. 

those are the two extremes of episodes–lots of big important plot moments and pretty much none–but most fall somewhere in between. in the hike, the actual plot of david and patrick’s engagement certainly matters, but the stuff with johnny going to the hospital is more about the character growth we see in their reactions (especially stevie’s) than it ultimately is about johnny’s actual health.

but this season, we have a tendency (and i absolutely include myself in this) to look at the episodes and ask how does this connect, where are they going with this, why is this important, etc. and while those are fair questions, when we’re focusing them solely on the actual episode plots, we’re expecting the show to be something it just hasn’t been in the past. i DO think that there is more interconnectedness and important substance in the episode plots this year, just by nature of it being a last season, but i don’t think it’s fair for us to expect that every scene be significant in some way when that’s just not the show that we have been watching all along. and i’m absolutely guilty of that sometimes–it’s literally what i said above about not knowing if the plots in this episode are really going to matter to the overall season–but i think it’s important for us to remember that sometimes an episode, or even just parts of an episode, can just be there because they’re funny. not everything has to have some larger meaning or connection to the big picture, as much as we might want it to. and maybe this one is just one of that kind of episode, and that’s okay.

[russellsppttemplates]

Exhausted and overwhelmed new parents, Mick and Reader get help from their support system Oma Corina and Tante Gina.

Tw: mentions childbirth (small moments), postpartum

They really weren't joking when they talked about a fourth trimester after you gave birth, all of the different processes your body was going through to meet your's and little Aurora's needs causing all kinds of changes and ultimately, you had been adjusting to it as best as you could, Mick helping out as much as he could, "Schatz, do you want me to take her? You've been walking around all morning, you need to rest too", your husband said as you stopped in front of him, passing Aurora into his arms as you noticed the time on the clock on the mantle piece to see that lunchtime was approaching. Kissing both of their cheeks, you headed to the kitchen to put one of the food trays you had made while you were nesting, already preparing for days like this where you couldn't think of a meal idea and cook it for you and Mick, taking the time to put the dishes and cutlery in the cupboard and drawer, looking over to the towells you assumed Mick had used to dry the plates and went to toss them in the laundry basket, thankful that it was on the ground floor and that you didn't need the extra effort to climb up the stairs.

After feeding Aurora, you and Mick sat together on the sofa while you ate, the food on the plates as you enjoyed some down time when his phone rang with a text from his sister asking if herself and Corinna could come for a visit that afternoon, "Are you okay with that? I can tell them to come on another day", he said, his hand coming to rub your arm up and down as you nodded, "I need to tidy this, but yeah, sure, they're more than welcome to come", you smiled soflty, the need to see other people and have more stimuli than what you've been having the past few weeks.

Despite wanting to tidy, you and Mick fell asleep, only waking up when you heard the doorbell, checking over Aurora who was cutely snuggled in her father's chest still, him waking up too as you got up to answer the door, "Hi dear, we tried calling the phone but you didn't answer!", Corinna said as she came forward for a hug, then hugging your sister in law before ushering them inside and into the living room, "Here's the little princess", Gina beamed, "come on brother, let tante Gina have some snuggles", she said as Mick kissed his daughter's head one last time before his sister took her in her arms, "I was supposed to tidy those after we ate, if you'll excuse me", you said as you grabbed the plates and headed to the kitchen. You were washing the plates when the pain around your abdomen and back started building up again, closing the tap and taking a breather while you tried to stretch your muscles a bit, hearing some footsteps approach the room, "do you need help Y/N?", your mother in law saying as she grabbed the sponge from you hands washing the rest of the things, "thank you for that", you said honestly. Lately it had been a lot, making sure the house was clean and good, that Aurora was as happy and content as a baby could be, both you and Mick really stretching the rope trying to manage it all, "We're still trying to get a grasp on everything", you mumbled as you felt your eyes close for a bit before opening them back up, "dear, you and Mick are overworking yourselves. It's not bad to ask for help sometimes, especially when we are more than happy to come over for the day", she offered, "I just don't want to be a disappointment", you said, tears brimming in your eyes as she came to you with open arms ready to take you in her embrace, "Oh Y/N, you're doing so well. I'm going to tell you how I did it. My kitchen did not look like yours, it looked like a mess. And I wasn't less of a parent or of a wife because of it", she reasoned as you nodded, knowing how much she meant to her children and how her value to them had nothing to do with folded kitchen towels and dried cutlery, "you gave birth to a beautiful babygirl, your body needs to rest still from all you're still doing for her now that she is outside", she said, "And Mick too. My goodness, he has been unstoppable, I don't know how he does it. He's there up with me everytime she needs a feed or a change during the night, he is there urging me on when it hurts or when I can't seem to do it. He also needs a rest too", you mused, feeling that if they were happy to help, you were happy to accept it, Corinna smiling at you.

So when Aurora wakes up, you change and feed her before she goes back to sleep on her Oma Corinna's chest, you and Mick then heading upstairs so you could have a shower without it having to be an alone quick task, your husband taking his time on helping you wash your body and show his gratefulness to you and how you made him a papa, the nonsexual touches and caresses, accompanied by the sweetest kisses, starting to make you feel a lot more comfortable on your own body again as the warm water softened the pain. After drying your bodies and putting on some soft pyjamas, Mick offered to lull you into a nap, "I've been getting pretty good at doing it with Rora, and we could both do with a nap, hm?", he said as he layed you both on the bed, your body finally relaxed enough to succumb to sleep.

You wake up from the nap to smell some delicious food, heading downstairs to see the table set up, Aurora gurgling with Corinna while Gina set the pots on the table, "I made some soup and the chicken is nearly done", she smiled sweetly before your mother in law offered you your daughter back, her little body resting against your chest as you took a sniff of her scent, feeling Mick hug you from behind as his hand rested on top of yours on Aurora's back, mouthing a thank you to his mother and sister as they managed to make everything feel a little less overwhelming.

(Thank you for submitting an ask 🤍)

[sarahrogersevans]

Can It Last? - Chris Evans X reader Fan Fiction

warnings: angst, mentions of anxiety and flashbacks, (let me know if I missed anything)

Summary: You and Chris were one of those couples where you were off and on a lot but always got back together and you both believed it could work but there were challenges along the way and you both loved each other so much.. can it last?

Chris and I were having another one of our fights about our conflicting schedules and usually we can work through these kind of fights pretty quick but this time.. it seems really different. Chris said “Y/N you know I have to travel a lot for my job and if I could be home more I would you know that!..”

I said “Chris I know .. it’s just I really really miss you.. I feel like you don’t wanna be around much.. it really upsets me Chris..” I curled up my knees towards my chest and hugged my legs towards me more and I started crying because I was scared to lose him and that we might break up again I was getting drained of getting my heart broken but I loved Chris so much and I know he loves me very much it’s just he’s just seemed so distant more than normal.

Chris looked at the state I was in and looked at me with a sad look and said “oh bubba.. hey I’m sorry..” He tried to put his hand on my knee but I flinched not knowing wether I felt ok with him touching me right now plus he knew I went through a lot in the past before we dated and that sometimes when people yell it triggers my anxiety and I start reliving stuff.. though he would never ever hurt me and knew I could get triggered easily sometimes but he would never get upset about it and I knew dating a celebrity like Chris wouldn’t be easy but to me it was worth the fight but I just didn’t wanna be the only one fighting for the relationship a lot..

later in the week we broke up for the third time for a week and while Chris and I weren’t talking I got a new apartment a few towns over from where I was and I got a new job and after about a month and three weeks I get a visitor at my apartment door.. Chris showed up. When I saw him standing at my door with flowers and him looking anxious I walked over and I said “Chris?.. what are you doing here?..” Chris turned around and took a sigh of relief and smiled at me and walked over to hug me which came as a surprise to me so I just stood there while he hugged me and said “baby thank god you scared the living shit out of me.. why did you move out of our place??”

I said “Chris.. we broke up remember?”

He said “I said I think we need a breather plus I had that long movie tour and that we would talk when I got back but when I got back you were..” Chris looked down and tried not to cry and continued saying “and you were gone bubba.. I worried something happened to you” I could see he was really upset and I said “I’m sorry Chris I guess I .. I thought when you took your suitcase and left I don’t know.. but I’m sorry I worried you.” Chris said “would it be ok if I came over and hugged you sweetheart?” I nodded and he took a few steps closer and wrapped his arms around me gently and held me close and said “I can’t lose you Y/N I really can’t I love you so much I’m sorry for everything I promise I will treat you right from here on in.” I looked at him to see if he was being genuine and I could see he really did wanna make it work. I cried happy tears and Chris saw my tears carefully wiped them away with his thumbs and cupped my cheeks in his hands and looked at me and said “Baby you’re it for me I swear to you I love you so much.. can I please kiss you? I miss kissing you.” I laughed while crying and nodded yes and he smiled and leaned in to kiss me and I melted into the kiss and didn’t wanna fight it anymore.

After the kiss he leaned his forehead against mine and said “let’s go home sweetheart, please?” I smiled and said “I’d love nothing more.” I moved back in with Chris and for the next few months were wonderful he treated me so much better and we spent so much time together and talked about everything. I felt very loved and cared for and Chris always made me feel so safe, there’s no one else I’d wanna be with than with Chris.

@fluffycutecevans

Hope you all enjoy this story xx 🤗 I got the idea for this one after watching a movie trailer I thought it would be an interesting fan fic.

[legaciezzz]

You Put My Comatose Girlfriend On Display?

Lizzie & Male Reader (x Hope?)

Genre: Crack

Request: Straight forward really. Hope and reader are in a secret relationship and when lizzie is designed as hope he finds her in private and kisses her and lizzir finds out about their relationship

You and Hope got together soon after her and Landon broke up. You two had always been close friends, so one night when she needed to talk about how guilty she felt for breaking up with him, you were there to comfort her. One thing led to another, you kissed and accidentally confessed your feelings for each other, but out of respect for Landon you decided to keep things a secret.  

Lizzie needed a breather from everything that was going  and had found an empty classroom. She didn’t know Hope did it all the time, being her was kind of exhausting.

You, seeing your girlfriend, quietly slipped into the room to check in on her as she was focusing on her breathing.

“Hey, how are you holding up?” you asked, coming up behind her and kissing her on the cheek.

Lizzie jumped and spun around to see you. “Y/N! What the hell was that?!”

You looked at her, confused by her reaction. After all, you were just trying to comfort her. “Sorry. There’s no one else around, I thought it was okay.”

She stared at you with wide eyes, realising that she was out of character. 

“You alright?”

“...Yes,” she said, putting on a wide nervous smile. “Of course I’m fine. Everything is totally fine.”

You held your gaze, not believing a word, until she finally caved in.

“Okay, fine. It’s Lizzie,” she admitted.

“What about Lizzie?”

“No you doofus, it’s me: Lizzie.” she said but she could still see the expression on your face. She sighed and took the ring off and took off the disguise.

Out of all the things you’ve seen from your time at the school, this was definitely the weirdest. You stood there with your mouth opened but couldn’t think of anything to say.

“So I’m kinda in witness protection right now. You know, since my sister has entered her whole goth phase and tried to kill me, plus do you honestly think I’d let you guys be in charge of planning my funeral? Just look at how you’ve chosen to dress yourself. Like seriously, when I say over my dead body, I don’t even mean that. Like--”

“Wait,” you said, cutting her off as you still tried to process the information. “If you’re disguising yourself as Hope, Then where’s the real Hope?”

“In a magically induced coma. Long story.”

“Coma?!” you exclaimed despite her casual tone. “I have to see her.”

“That’s gonna be a bit of a problem, she’s acting as my body double at the moment… she’s in the casket.”

“In the casket? What the fuck? You put my comatose girlfriend on display?!”

“I mean when you put it like that-- Girlfriend?” she said, cutting herself off as she got  distracted by your words. “You and Hope Dating??”

“I-- erm, we uh--” you caught stammering as you tried to come up with an explanation.

“Since when?” she pressed you. “Y/N, Spill it!”

“Er-- No, I see what you’re doing here. You can’t brush off Hope being in a coma just like that!”

“It’s not even that bad, it’s more of  a deep sleep-- And if anyone is deflecting it’s you!” Lizzie jabbed your chest with her finger. “Now when did you guys get together?”

“A week after she broke up with Landon.”

“A week?! Are you serious?”

“I know it’s bad, that’s why we wanted to keep it a secret.”

“You know how shady it’s gonna look like when the squad finds out.”

“Please don’t tell anyone,” you pleaded, putting your hands together. “Hope will kill me.”

Then you heard a couple students in the halls.

“Have you seen Hope? Dr. Saltzman is looking for her.”

“Nope.”

Then you and Lizzie looked at each other.

“Fine.” she said, putting the ring back on. ”But you owe me.”

You  both went to walk out the room and you gave her one final glance and cringed. “I can’t believe I almost kissed you.”

Tags: @prglitch