#like i know it’s the shitty weather
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train delays are CRAZY why was i directed to three different platforms 20 mins after my original train should’ve arrived 💀💀
#like i know it’s the shitty weather#wet snowy windy like it’s a recipe for late trains but still pls why did they swap the platforms around so last minute 😭😭#stelle yaps#everyone touch wood that my ticket works pls or im screwed
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In an interesting coincidence you first mentioned living in Florida the day it was revealed to me I may have to move their and now everytime you mention florida more news about this comes to light . Have you cursed me?
This is not the place for me to go into my insane ramblings but
I’m warning you.
If you can avoid it. Don’t. Don’t. Do it.
Don’t curse yourself.
If at all possible. Don’t. The state is actively running itself into the ground.
#I understand things are sometimes out of your control#but if you aren’t making 100k+ or already rich#you will suffer. immensely.#a shitty bug infested musty ass one bedroom apartment is 2k to rent#the wages here are in the dirt#the traffic. the drivers.#THE WEATHER..#I can only speak for central and south fl#north fl is the south.. idk what goes on up there.#the more north you go the more south it gets#also if you are anything but mega straight or cis HOLY SHIT. DONT DO IT.#like it’s actually dangerous.#don’t.#ask me how I know.. ha. hahaha. get me outta here.#non voice post#ask#asks
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...😭
#i've never had a job in my own field that i've liked as much as i've liked my current one#the semester is ending soon and today i heard my contract will not be renewed bc the person i'm substituting will return to work after all#i've been feeling so tired and a bit poorly after the nokia arena show and i probably should have called in sick today#as i was absolutely useless today#and then after my only class today my students came to me with a gift?? 😭#a pink enamel moomin mug and some chocolate and a paper on which they had written nice things about me + a drawing of a dachshund 😭#and i burst to tears right there in front of them because i was so touched (and also because i'm just really really tired and emotional)#i'm so tired about having to apply for new jobs and having to start all over again#i'm so tired of having to do shitty short-notice substitutions again#i feel like i deserve better than that but on the other hand i fee like life's giving me exactly what i deserve and maybe this is it#i'm dreading the summer because idk if i'll have a job to go to in the autumn#and even if i did find something it won't be like the job i have now#also. it's may day eve and the weather's lovely#and i'm hiding in my apartment with the curtains closed so i won't see all the people going out and having fun with their friends#for me may day eve has never been like that. i've always felt so very excluded from those celebrations#on top of that i got yelled at by a bus driver and i'm the worst friend that ever existed#i'm trying to quit on whining about my sad little life but it gets so lonely#please know i'm not writing this for attention or pity. i know y'all have problems of your own and i'm just being a dramatic crybaby
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The stupid crossover dream I had (with the younger and older Astrids) reminded me just how much I looooooove that Httyd's character color scheme doesn't have pink in it...ever. Astrid is just NEVER reduced to pink. Neither is Ruffnut. Nor Valka.
Httyd doesn't do the standard Marvel red = brazen, reckless character x blue = calm, level-headed character design either.
Httyd mostly contrasts green with light blue, dirty yellow, browns and everything in between. Red with black. Black with green. Brown with white. Turquoise with orange. So many naturally occuring colors being used to their maximum efficiency.
Sometimes I think all it takes to make a female character relatable is to give her a non-pink color scheme. Astrid is so normal. Being a badass warrior doesn't prevent her from choosing to wear a skirt - and yet it's never pink! The same goes even for other characters. Like, Hiccup is just a dude! He wears objectively "boring" clothes - as the main character AND the Chief's son!
It's fun because on a scale of who has the most impressive outfit, you'd never pick Stoick yet here we are. The man wears chainmail and a knee-long robe with striped pantaloons. Fashion icon.
Yeah Idk I just wanted to get this out there.
You know what's pink in Httyd? You know what's actually pink?????
THE SKY.
#this also reminds me of Kevin Costner's Robin Hood#you know; it's cold in England and the weather is shitty???#so people end up actually wearing scarfs; gloves; and multiple layers of wool on top of each other???#like there's no special bare-armed hero aesthetic it's just effing cold and they roll with it!!! love those outfits so much!!!#LotR operates like this too I believe#anyway#httyd#wherethekiteflies#analysis#httyd analysis
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californians and texans need to team up against midwesterners actually bc they think theyre special. i keep getting midwest meme pages recommended to me and they'll be like 'the weather here is so wild 🤭 and don't get me started on the way people drive 🫠' we need to humble them..
#dont both our states have skiing and deserts#and notably shitty drivers fwiw#anyway. i saw a post being like 'its so hot up here in the midwest ☹️' while actively on my shift where the weather app said feels like 112#and it filled me with rage. i Know its the exact same way where yall live i have agents in the field (the 2 known californian mutuals)#also csn i let you in on a texas secret. the people that say 'fuck californians we dont want you here 🙄😤 stop moving here'#theyre from fucking richardson or some shit bro nobody wants to be there anyway#i cant even go to bat for tex mex most things north of houston and/or east of odessa are mid at best#tbf i havent eaten cali mex or. any california food in 6 years so idk. but yall have a shot here#we do have better barbecue tho. and megan thee stallion. and simone biles#and aren devilfruitdyke ❓️
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-Visiting Gale
It's been one week.
One week since Sam wore her father's ghostface costume.
One week since Tara had to see two other friends dying at their hands.
One week since Gale almost die.
Tara knows that the relationship between Gale and Sam is complicated, but she also knows how much her sister looks up to her.
It's almost like she's the mother figure that sam has never had.
And if Tara has to be honest, she also sees Gale that way.
Sam has been miserable ever since Gale ended up at the hospital. Unless it's to go to work, She barely goes out of her room, barely talks to anyone and barely eats.
Of course, Tara won't let her sister's self-destructive mechanism win.
Sam is stubborn, but Tara is on another level of stubbornness.
"Okay you need to stop, get out of the bed"
"No, leave me alone" sam said, covering herself with the covers.
'25, but she acts like a child', tara thinks.
Tara, being the sweet little sister she is, pushed sam out of her bed, and that ended up with Sam falling on her back on the floor.
"TARA! Did you forget i'm still injured?" Yes, actually. Tara was so focused on pursuing her mission to get Sam out of bed that she did forget her sister got stabbed.
Well, it's too late now.
"Not my fault. I tried to ask you nicely but you didn't listen" Tara said with a smug smile on her face. She then added "Go take a shower and get dressed, we're going somewhere"
Sam, of course, did not listen to her and decided that the bed was a much better option than what Tara proposed.
Why did Tara even think that it was going to be easy to convince her?
"SAM! will you just get the fuck out of this bed?" Now Tara was gettin impatient.
"i'm older than you, and i can do whatever i want"
Oh.
Okay. Sam wants to play the big sister card? Let's play it then.
Sam thought she won. Tara finally stopped trying.
But Sam should know better than that.
Tara Carpenter doesn't give up easily.
It's been 30 minutes since Tara left her room without saying anything. Has she gone too far? Has Tara really gotten offended by her words?
Sam was about to get out of bed and check on Tara, when she heard HER voice.
"Get out of this bed c'mon"
No. She did not call her.
"I know you heard me."
Oh no, she did.
Kirby Reed was standing at Sam's door with that little shit smirking next to her.
"You said you wouldn't follow my orders because i'm not old enough, so i called someone that is old enough to help me out" Tara said in a proud and devilish tone.
Yeah, Tara was right. Her plan worked. Sam took a shower and got dressed, and with kirby's help, she was even able to convince her to eat something.
But now there's the actual real hard part.
"So where are we going?" Sam asked curiously.
Tara and Kirby kept glancing at each other without saying a word.
"Hello? Are you two still here? Where are we going?" But after not getting an answer again, Sam lost her *already* non-existent patience. "If you don't tell me, i'm going back to my room, and it won't be that easy to get me out of -"
"We're going to see Gale" Tara decided to admit.
"Absolutely not" Sam ran into her room again and slammed the door.
Mh. That went better than she expected.
"I'm going to talk to her" Kirby said, already heading to Sam's room, but Tara stopped her.
She had to be the one dealing with it. It's her sister.
"Sam? I just want to talk, i promise that if you really don't want to, we don't have to go" Tara tried to be as convincing as possible.
A few minutes pass before a distraught Sam opens the door and falls into Tara's arms, sobbing.
Oh... something must be really wrong with her, Tara knows her sister. She doesn't act like this. The only time she saw Sam being an emotional wreck was when Gale was attac- Wait.
Tara was starting to connect the dots.
"You don't- you don't think that Gale getting hurt is your fault do you?"
"Yes, i do, because- because IT IS my fault. Why would she even want to see me? I'm the one who put her in a hospital bed." Sam cried even harder, feeling completely unable to calm down.
Tara didn't say anything.
Her original plan was to NOT force Sam into going to see Gale.
But Tara knows that Sam will never believe her words unless she sees it with her own eyes.
And that's why she drags Sam out of her room and into Kirby's car.
The car ride to the hospital was hell for both Tara and Kirby, Sam hasn't stopped complaining for one second. She's acting like an actual child throwing tantrums.
Oh, Tara is so going to tease her for it when she feels better.
They finally arrive at the hospital.
Tara ends up literally having to push Sam into Gale's room. She knew that it would've been hard but not THIS hard.
There's a moment of silence between them. No one dares to speak. They're just all staring at each other.
The peaceful silence is broken when Tara and Kirby start laughing unstoppably at Sam's inaudible "Hi Gale." Of course, they were aware that Sam was going to kick their asses the moment they stepped one foot out of this room.
But at least it was worth it.
"What happened to you? Did i break the big bad Samantha Carpenter?" Gale said, surprising everyone.
Tara, for the first time in days, saw Sam genuinely smiling.
It's been another week from the day Sam finally visited Gale at the hospital, and they've been inseparable ever since.
You might think it's a positive thing.
But no.
For Tara, it isn't.
Everyday. Every single day. Sam refuses to leave Gale's hospital room when visiting hours end.
And Tara, every single day, has to forcefully drag Sam out of the room.
It's not always bad. Sometimes, Sam is more collaborative than other days, but today is not one of them.
"Sam, please, for the love of god, we need to go, or they'll call the cops... again."
"No. Who even decides visiting hours? I can visit Gale whenever i want."
"Yeah, that's not how it works"
"And i couldn't care-"
"I am demanding you to get the hell out of my room and listen to your sister." Gale interrupts the sister's daily fight.
"But-" Sam saw the look Gale gave her and decided it was better to shut her mouth and stop giving Tara a hard time. "Okay, but promise me you will call me if you need anything"
"Yes Sam. Now go"
"And remember to stay hydrated"
"Yes"
"And get some sleep"
"I will, if you finally let me rest"
"And text me when you wake up"
"I will get up from this bed and kick you out myself if you don't disappear in the next 5 seconds."
Alright, it's time for sam to actually leave the room this time.
Mh Tara is being too quiet, Sam thought.
Weird- oh.
Maybe she should really try to make this easier for her.
Tara was asleep on a chair outside of Gale's room.
#this is actually just a silly funny thing#i made this because i was rambling about needing more of sam tara and gale and i came up with this idea#this is actually shitty#i tried to be funny but idk if it worked or not lmao#i just love the idea of sam being a big baby sometimes and tara having to act like the big sister in those moments#sam only following orders from her mother (gale) and her older sister (kirby) is such a funny concept to me#tara now knows how it feels to deal with a sister that doesn't listen to anything she says#sam and tara are gale's adopted daughters#tara carpenter#sam carpenter#gale weathers#kirby reed#fic tag
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I found out about ADHD induced anger the other day through a shitpost on Reddit and I'm frustrated that I didn't know about it until now lol Not even the behavioral specialist I saw mentioned it!!! Sometimes I'll get mad over the dumbest shit and sit there simmering over it for hours and then once I finally pull myself out of it I'm just like "well that was fucking stupid" lmfao
I've been calling it "baby brain mode" because I figured out that I get into those moods the easiest when I'm hungry, sleepy, or when I'm bored but absolutely nothing sounds fun/engaging. Usually I'm pretty good at recognizing when I'm going into baby brain mode and can distract myself out of it or go get a snack or whatever but sometimes I don't and then I end up frowning at a wall for like an hour lol
Tbh I'm mostly bringing this up in case other people with ADHD also didn't know about it. Here's an article (with sources) that explains it more: healthline.com/health/adhd/adhd-and-anger
Content warning on the article for mentions of suicide and drug abuse.
#textpost#Ngl I thought I just operated on a higher level of assholery than most people because I get grumpy over dumb stuff a lot#But knowing it's because my brain's got 90 different crossed wires will make it easier to deal with it#Another thing to add to the list of stuff I wish I knew like 15-20 years ago lol!!#Ahhh better late than never I guess#Putting music on and exercising regularly helps a lot so those airpods my dad got me will be really nice bc they fit in my pocket#But I haven't been exercising much lately because of how busy I've been... Which (on top of the shitty weather) probably explains-#-why I've been cranky over completely random things lately. UGH!!!!!!!!
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Vague work email: Don't come into the building until we send an additional notification
Me: 🤔 Is this flooding or a bomb threat?
#Given my work place's history it is truly a toss up which it is#I mean flooding is more likely given the weather and our shitty roof leaking repeatedly over the years and our current roof construction#But also we've had two safety threats in the last 5 years that evacuated the building so like 🤷🏻♀️ Who knows!#Thankfully I'm working from home so it's not my problem 😊
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What if they didn't put ads every 3 posts. Three posts between ads, literally. Not even counting the ad for Tumblr Live.
Also what if tumblr didn't know what city Im in. I do not want my location tracked or stored anywhere unless I give explicit ongoing permission, like with my GPS app that I allow to track me only when the app is open, and then it deletes the data (allegedly) when I stop giving permission.
#ugh i do SO much to try to keep my location private. i use an android with all the tracking things Off (except for my weather app#which is a highly specific app that does NOTHING except provide weather; and i have the location turned Off so it doesnt even know where i#live). my tumblr email is not connected to any real life stuff because i made it when i was very closeted and made a new email and password#for it and never linked them to anything else. i have bare minimum apps. i use firefox and duckduckgo.#for shits sake i use a small barely-known map app because any Map App that has had large success under capitalism is inevitably going to#start selling private info or working with a cheap security system designed to allow quiet data leaks.#i guess i use gmail and gphotos but my phone doesnt HAVE a native Photo App. i have to use one i download and im too damn skittish to try#i guess i did get netflix recently....sigh.... i figured they WERENT tracking me because they email me EVERY TIME I USE NETFLIX to alert me#that OHHHH A NEW DEVICE IS USING NETFLIX AAAAA WHAT IF ITS AGAINST NETFLIX POLICY OH NOOOO. so i figured they didnt have a way to ID me.#UGH. CAN I PLEASE EXIST WITHOUT BEING MONITORED FOR FIVE SECONDS. can i please access Social Media which is a shitty substitute for actual#human connection but its the best i have--without someone noting my location and then trying to sell me things??? can i please watch film???#i cant go to a theater because my region does NOT believe in covid and not even medical staff attending Very Ill Patients wear masks anymore#stupid fucking homophobic transphobic anti-vax society has made it too dangerous for me to access most Not-Online forms of enrichment. and i#cant even use the Internet (a magnificent ASTONISHING human creation) without being tracked and advertised to.#ugh..#humanity is just so cool and brave and kind and amazing and yet we have taxes and advertisment IDs and traffic and medicine shortages.#its not like the ads even work. even when it shows me stuff i DO want. i cant fucking afford things. i already have spent too much money on#things that i dont need like Good Food and Entertainment and Juice. ugh....okay i do need food and liquids....Good food even. my body cant#survive on College Foods like it could in the past. And i might literally die if i dont buy juice...#and i guess its really really really heartwarming to have good entertainment to take breaks from all the stress.... its not like i havent l#..... like im so frugal. thank god my partners encourage me to buy myself things. i have been so much healthier since giving in and buying#Non-Water drinks instead of just Chronically Drinking Less Than A Bottle Of Water A Day. my partners are so good and sweet 😓 i shouldnt be#upset with myself for letting them convince me to take care of myself. that isnt fair to them or me so i will stop doing that now.#my faith in humanity is mostly just knowing that my partners exist. theyre so sweet. if people like them exist--then i have faith in humanty#no pressure lol. they are both so good and perfect regardless of how much energy they have to spare for Being Good. they are just inherently#very dear and good to me and for me. but just because i have faith in humanity doesnt mean im gonna stop complaining the whole time!!!!!! i#will whine about the bad stuff forever!!!! and BITE IT if i ever get the chance. but i will complain until the bothersome things go away.#if i complain my whole life with no results then...! so be it. i will whine and it will be art somehow.#sorenhoots
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#been sitting in my car for 30 min after clocking out then just making up errands to have an excuse to do smth#so i dont have to go home &be alone until i have smth to do again (go to work the next morning) :(((((#hate how u can go a whole day w out seeing someone &think ok maybe i can get a good nights sleep but then they show up#10 min before u leave for the day &then ur night is ruined bc u have trouble falling asleep#then have stress dreams when u do finally fall asleep#😞😞#ik its bc i havent confronted anything but i dont see myself ever doing it or rather initiating the confrontation bc idt it's my place#like what right do i have to disrupt what someone else has going to bring myself some ease#idk this probably doesnt make any sense i just need to vent bc i have cried in my car everyday after work for a month 😭#im ok ive just landed myself in a particularly shitty situation but only for me#everyone else is fine 🫠#&im a chronic overthinker so i have all these thoughts just swirling around &festering#im driving myself insane &then whenever im around.....the other ppl in this situation.....theres never a chance to let any of it out#im gonna explode at some point i know it &i dont want that to happen bc i dont want to be mean :(( but i also dont want to grow to resent#anyone bc this shit hasnt been properly dealt with :(((((#ugh .#changing of the weather isnt helping i feel like im 16 again in my dark bedroom driving myself insane 😭😭
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DnD players will brag openly about making life as hard as possible for the DM and then wonder why they can't get a playgroup and never ever connect the dots
#Cassidy.txt#if you are antagonistic to the DM right out of the gate the one who is picking sides and making it us vs them is YOU#you shouldn't be antagonistic anyways you literally asked them to do it for you#being a first time DM was genuinely one of the worst social experiences of my life#basically everyone there was brand new but instead of the nice coaching everyone else got they just openly mocked what I did#I did voices for them; they made fun of the voices#I talk a bit about the weather; they smirk and demand to know what the continent's seasons are like#and if they use months like we do#and if the seasons are the same#literally enjoying the chance to force me to do creative work for them#making fun of my characters. whining about any possible consequence even when they walked right into them.#whining when I tried to discuss behavior.#I gave up on making original content bc it was just being made fun of constantly#and when I switched to making fun pop culture references one of my players complained that that 'shouldn't be allowed'#literally complaining whenever I tried to have fun during the fucking game we were supposed to be having fun with together#miserable shitty experience with a bunch of jerks#and they are all SHOCKED that I no longer like DnD#cause to them DMs aren't playing the game with them
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me talking shit in the notes on my posts about nmj popping like a pop rock when he qi deviates: 🤡🤡🤡
my brain: lol that's hilarious. yo btw it's been a while since you last had brain zaps hasn't it
me: yeah I guess. wait NO--
#too late ⚡️#i'm sorry da-ge forgive me da-ge#also if you don't know what brain zaps are they are actually harmless but also SUPER uncomfortable and irritating#and I seem particularly prone to them for 🤷♀️ mystery reasons#the weather outside looks like a shitty mess tho so I imagine that contributes
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Poppin' in to say that this blog is not abandoned again, it's just that the heat wave is hitting me hard rn and when it cools down at night i'm too exhausted to even sketch a silly thing.
I'm still trying to at least finish the last doodles i made, just to post something :/.
#i HATE hot weather#vinny talks#the water pressure is shitty as per usual so i have to go outside to charge the buckets#at least i'm losing the weight i put on in my grandma's house i think so that's a positive#this is just venting i know but let a man whine like a child a little i'll shut up soon#even my PHONE is overheating yk the last time it was like this i had a heat stroke (is that what you call a golpe de calor?)#and i'm not looking forwards to vomiting and feeling like shit for 3 days straight again tbh and i wasn't evem exposed to the sun like wtf
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👫 (Matt?)
Send a 👫 and I’ll write four headcanons I have about our muse’s relationship
Initially, Matt and Kirk's first meeting did NOT go well. A chance visit to Gotham quickly alerted Matt that not all was well within the crime-ridden city; something very large and dangerous was lurking out there, something only he could hear. A timely intervention on Daredevil's part saved an unlucky wanderer out late at night from getting drained of every last drop of blood but bringing down the beast would be a whole other mission for the vigilante of Hell's Kitchen. Fortunately, future meetings would be on much friendlier terms. Kirk would be able to relate to Matt and vice versa what with both men having disabilities since they were children, in a world where able-bodied people tend to look down upon or pity those less 'capable'. Kirk WOULD admire Matt's prowess to get about without actually requiring assistance but Matt is a good lawyer and an even better superhero! Kirk was raised on less strict grounds but does believe in God. He would respect Matt's beliefs in Catholicism along with how difficult it can be at times, neither judging nor condemning the man's actions and words. It's hard enough being tough on yourself and Kirk would approach Matt kindly, particularly in times when he senses Matt is not doing well or has been punishing himself. Matt knows when Kirk has been taking his serum and when Man-Bat is most likely to make an appearance. Out of everybody he knows, Matt stands the best chance of convincing Kirk to kick the habit for good or at least hold Man-Bat back, preventing his wild instincts from taking control.
#defectivexfragmented#memes ;; four headcanons#Sorry this took a little while to do!#Had my hands full the last couple of days but this was fun to write!#I think these two have the potential to become friends#Matt has so many issues but Kirk is like#He is so unwilling to abandon somebody#He'll be there through thick and thin and weather out the storm#Like he's got a lot of his own shitty issues and know how rough it can be when people leave you because of it#Kirk having issues when it comes to being deaf and Matt helping him get over them#It's okay to be disabled and doesn't always need 'fixing'
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thank god it's clock out time i was about to fucking lose it
#pretty sure I'm using the right number because you refuse to keep track of them#if you make me hunt down another number over a charge that is less than ten dollars i will scream#and then there's the grantee who makes double my salary and complains about everything#yes i know you live in a rural area guess what. so do I. yeah i know we asked you to talk about trans kids and i don't want to hear about#how 'people out here just don't support that.' I know that's the truth but we're still asking for data because it's the right thing to do.#I know what people in the country behave like i fucking live here and i don't want to be reminded of how shitty it is!#meanwhile all of this was distracting me from reading about adolescent substance overdose deaths so now I have to finish reading tomorrow#FUCK.#it's fine. I'm fine.#these are all normal regular job problems that i would have at any job. my job is on the whole very good and not soulsucking#and I'm stressing too hard about the weather and family obligations and moving so i just didn't need ANY of this#I did get more of a rhythm today though so that's a start#okay bye nap time i've tired myself out like a toddler having a tantrum#this aussie guy i know calls tantrums wookiees and I always wondered if it was an aussie thing or a him thing
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Uggggghhhhh
#It's been raining for like three days#I'm exhausted - probably because weather + work? + period#I got soaked walking home tonight#and totally biffed a social interaction with someone asking for help getting a meal and now I feel guilty#and the cat is being a pest because my roommate's out of town and I've been in the office the oast three days so she's been home alone#and has Feelings about that#and I just... ugh#everything's hard#but not as hard as it probably is for the woman I didn't buy a meal fornon ky way home!#even though it really was within my means to do#so that's extremely shitty!#🙃#fucking hell#oh! AND my dad keeps texting me things for which my main two options for reply seem to be either ''Okay'' or simply ignoring#so I've been ignoring them#which feels both more and less rude than simply saying okay#but I simply cannot!#what do you want me to say when you tell me you went to the bank & need to find a mechanic for your car & gave your ex-wife/my mom some $#and she says she's doing well (I know - I talk to her)#and you still think you're gonna run for presidentbut you literally have dementia#I should go back to therapy at some point#this post might self-destruct later
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