#like i feel like i mentioned like three different things and didnt elaborate on any of them. just tying myself into knots over this

[ineedtofinishthh]

i feel like i forgot that makoto isnt really your Friend. like hes got his own grand plan and is using yuma a bit to reach it, and hes also probably spiteful toward yuma for things that happened in their past, that yuma cant even remember! like i definitely think theyre brothers or close enough that they used to live together, but makoto just doesnt mention it when they meet again, even though its obvious that hes been keeping an eye on him when he brings him to kanai tower after the agency explodes. maybe he knew about the deal yuma was going to make with shinigami, so he already accepted that yuma would be a different person. but he also expected there to be more emotions involved when yuma woke up like he had been waiting to see if yuma Really didnt remember Anything about him.

and Then all that with makotos 'present' knocking everyone out so they could be transported to the restricted area. i feel like makotos trying to teach yuma a lesson in a way that he cant hide from or just in the most painful way possible. i dont think that the remains we are finding are actually the other detectives' corpses, so it mustve been set up to Be Distressing so that the information that each person 'left behind' will be believed quicker (like the difference between being explained everything by the Mysterious Masked Guy and getting bits and pieces of the grander picture from what you think is the last investigations of your friends is HUGE i think). but i dont really know what any of it MEANS yet or if anything that im thinking is even on the right track right now. i dont even know what the Blank Week Mystery is yet!

[corvidares]

thoughts and feelings about fnaf: into the pit

(spoilers! talk of endings!)

so, while i enjoyed playing this game a lot, i am left feeling dissatisfied in a lot of ways, mostly in relation to what the hell just happened

on the side of things i LIKED:

the pixel style!!! good god this feels so perfect for fnaf. obviously we've always had the minigames in the retro style, and while fnaf has had a fine enough "look" for years, i really hope to see more stylization like this. the pixel art and animations are beautiful and full of character

there's a lot of visual detail, both in the sense of easter eggs (of course) and background clutter. fnaf games are always good at having gross settings, and this definitely does that. even the cloud of dust that pops up every time you jump in the ball pit is yucky, lmao

speaking of details, the sound design is also VERY good. it conveys a lot of what is not seen; the closer you get to a kid thats been captured by spring trap (pit trap? guys idk what to call him) the more you hear their cries and whimpers. of course, as always, sound is a part of the gameplay too, helping you know if spring trap is close and that you need to hide

the writing in terms of dialogue and such is good! i like that oswald is.. well, he's kinda dumb. rightfully so, for a kid! he does things that arent always logical, it takes him a hot minute to figure out that hes in the past, etc

its also genuinely distressing and sad to see him suffering, to see him try to tell his mom that something is deeply wrong, only to be brushed aside because (presumably) the possession magic is invisible to adults. to see his trauma get worse and worse as the days pass; nightmares, visions, straight up sleeping through his school day because he's been up all night! even his idle sprites are always sad and scared

the gameplay itself! the learning curve felt appropriate, i liked the strategy of using the noise makers, hiding, and the vents. fwiw i did play the "creepy" setting which is essentially easy mode. but i still died plenty, its not a complete cakewalk or anything.

the classic fnaf snark sense of humor is definitely here in this game, and i love it. the achievements? hilarious. the tips on the loading screens, jeff's entire character?? good stuff.

misc things i noticed:

for whatever reason, after night 1 i had a constant "bloody/strain" filter at the edges of my gameplay. not sure if this is like, random? game footage ive seen doesnt have it, and one even had a different filter. not sure what to make of it, it seems odd to just be a meaningless, randomized detail?

i got one glitch: after checking the cameras while the other kid is in security with me, oswald's sprite didnt reappear and i couldnt do anything. so i had to restart the game lol. not major, and i have no idea how common it is. otherwise everything was quite functional iirc

regarding the more critical side of things.. im mostly frustrated. now, i know fnaf, i know it never serves you answers on a platter. i know theres always an abundance of easter eggs and secrets (which i have tried to research, tho the game is still new). but upon finishing the game and seeing all the endings, i realized i didnt get answers about a lot of things i thought i would. for example;

where the hell is foxy??? the other core three are there and get added as enemies when you progress. his stage is present and some kids at the past party mention they miss seeing him. but he's not on ANY of the imagery throughout the pizzeria. in fact, we don't see him at all. if i didnt know who foxy was, i would only know his name. the only exception might be some empty masks in the backgrounds, but honestly i doubt it. this seems.. really strange to me. ill elaborate later

why did spring trap tie up oswald's dad? what was he going to do to him? did.. did anyone even die? oswald rescues everyone!

this is probably silly and i acknowledge that. but what was up with the giant spider jump scares..... i assumed itd be a new enemy or something but nah. THAT SPIDER WAS TOO BIG. WHY

what was oz's dad doing this whole time? was he trying to escape at some point? why is his shit all over the resturant?

onto just general critiques:

the gameplay did get a bit formulaic and sometimes fetch quests felt repetitive and/or like busy work. like why did i have to get five different sets of keys. bruh

the story has a lot of plotholes. and again, this is fnaf, these games have always looked like swiss goddamn cheese. but i can still be frustrated about it

for example, how is time passing in the past versus the present? IS it passing if we're not there? how do we affect the past? why does no one in the present acknowledge what happened here?? did spring trap get caught in this timeline? did anyone die? was oswald always a part of these events or did he change the timeline? this is presumably the first four/five murders, but a lot doesnt add up. is there a timeline where oz is one of the murdered kids? in the bad ending, he gets possessed, but not stuffed in a suit.

how does spring trap's possession even work? back then he was still alive and perfectly mortal... right? but then again, he supposedly strangles himself in the end, then leaps back to life to kill jeff? huh???

why is spring trap so animalistic? he doesnt seem human, and his eyes glow, which i dont think is something that suit can do (though i could definitely be remembering wrong)

speaking of which, i dont think the og four's eyes glow either, but they do in this game.

the "true good" ending does not make any fucking sense, first of all. second of all, considering the amount of work one would have to do to get it, it is extremely minimal. if i had done all that and only gotten a slight dialogue change as well as a "yay happy eating pizza at jeff's" scene i wouldve been PISSED.

also, speaking of not making sense, im sorry but oswald's lie to his dad about what happened is so obviously not true. why does he not question this at ALL? ESPECIALLY considering he has a fucking CHUNK OF HIS ARM BITTEN OFF. we see in jeff's ending that that shit bled a fucking lot! was his dad too concussed to call him on the obvious lie of "you fell and hit your head". and if he was, he would OBVIOUSLY NOTICE LATER THAT FIVE DAYS HAVE PASSED. AND THAT SOMEONE WAS WALKING AROUND PRETENDING TO BE HIM. WHAT (and dont say "oh he thinks he just lost his memory of those days" YOU DO NOT LOSE HUGE CHUNKS OF MEMORY UNLESS THERE IS MAJOR BRAIN DAMAGE OR TRAUMA. UH UH)

while talking to my gf, we came up with a couple theories.

one, she thinks its likely this game had more planned. and i agree - the missing presence of foxy is the biggest indicator, in my opinion, but theres other things too. for example, despite the fact that we're never able to enter the library or mill, both places have a map that can be pulled up when you press the map button outside those buildings.

the mill, especially, obviously has a ton of animatronic parts in the trash, and we all know that can be important... it seems to be too big a thing to be a simple easter egg, but what do i know.

another thing that feels way too big to be an easter egg is gabrielle; the girl who gives you a notebook with information about the animatronics (not foxy :( ) that provides hints for later. she mentions that her grandfather was a technician that worked with them back in the day. he never talks about it now though (the ONE acknowledgement we get in the present that bad shit went down!!!)

like.. is this henry? someone else? SURELY that is not a random guy. but it's a one and done interaction. i thought, when meeting her, that she would become a friend and ally, that we'd be able to learn more. the writing seemed to slant that way, but no. we're never able to talk to her again afaik

all this lends itself to the idea that the game was pushed. i can perfectly picture, like a year ago, someone telling the team "fnaf 10th anniversary is august 2024, get it out for then" and them having to cut stuff they had planned (but perhaps not developed, as afaik there are not missing assets showing foxy or the other things mentioned)

which is obviously a shame, and if thats the case i of course commend the team! this is a great game, especially if it was rushed. but this is becoming a pattern with fnaf games, and considering this is such a big successful franchise, that should not be the case.

anyway! overall, i truly did enjoy playing into the pit, and im very glad it was my first experience playing a fnaf game myself rather than watching a playthrough. and there are secrets that seem to be deliberately cliffhangers, in true fnaf game fashion. such as the photo that stuns spring trap, or the minigames.

[wizkiddx]

was thinking for toms most recent ig story it sounds like hes working out early everyday, what if u did a blurb where the reader does it with his and its like best friend --> something else ? sounded like a you type of story, id love if you gave it a go ❤️💕

oohkay so sorry this lit just came through this evening and I suddenly got v stupidly into it (if u put in a req before that I promise I am working on it I just got way to invested cos this is stupidly cute) xxxx

summary: what starts off as tom taking you under his wing and some sunrise workouts together might just develop into something more

“It shouldn’t be legal…. to be doing anything… this fucking early!” Spoken, well yelled, in between the fake strokes of the exercise bike and your pants. All you got in response was the two men laughing at you, no sign of sympathy at all, as your gritted your teeth - fighting against every body instinct to stop the movements. Your heart was pumping like the clappers; breathing shallow and rushed and your arms… your arms felt like they were about to fall off. Combine that with the lack of sleep from waking up before the sun did at 5 am - meant you felt like your were in literal hell.  

Why ever you’d agreed to do these workouts with Tom and Duffy escaped you. Being the new and rising actress, with a new supporting role in the next Spiderman, meant you’d spent a lot of time with Tom over the past few weeks. Not to inflate his ego either, but Tom had been a real life hero to you. See, you were the complete opposite of his experienced and seasoned professionalism - this was your first acting gig. And what a gig it was, the second biggest part in a Marvel movie. You never really believed you’d get the part and even when you did, were pretty sure it was some elaborate joke, where Ant and Dec were going to jump out from some corner and go ‘ha its a prank!’ or something. 

Yet somehow it was all still happening, you had been flown halfway across the world to spend three months alone on a film set. Well obviously not alone, but you knew no one - you were a complete outsider. That, really, was the reason you’d agreed to do these sessions with Tom. He’d offered half heartedly while between takes as you were moaning about how out of breath you got in that scene. At that point, you’d only known each other for a matter of weeks, he really hadn’t expected you to commit to 5 am each and every morning. What he wasn’t aware of though, was how ocmplerly stranded and lonely you felt here, hence why you jumped at his offer. 

And yes you loved to moan and complain when you were there, however you were also so incredibly thankful he ever offered. Duffy, Tom’s PT, was a right laugh too and he took great joy in torturing you - and was also entertained by the new and inventive ways you’d insult him after he ordered you about. 

“Come on Y/n, 200m more and then we are done, even your little arms can survive that.”

“Really … not the encouragement… I was looking for.” Still panting, face bright red and blotchy as you pressed your legs straight again.

“Tom? You wanna help Y/n out?” 

“Nah you know… kind of enjoying seeing her in pain.” The British voice laughed from somewhere behind you, making you roll your eyes.

“Why the hell… are you not… torturing him?” He sounded way to comfortable and relaxed to be working hard. 

“He’s got a stunt heavy day today so wanted to go easy this morning.”

Now that was a bloody joke. You were BOTH filming the SAME scene today, doing the SAME stunts. 

“Did I forget to mention Y/n is on set too?” The joy in Tom’s voice made you want to do horrible things to him. Even though you felt like you wanted to collapse on the floor, you’d happily do a set or two on a punch bag right now - if that punch bag was Tom’s face. 

Before you could hurl some fresh abuse at your costar, Duffy called time on the rowing machine, turning the display off and passing your water bottle over as you slouched on the slidey seat. 

“Done good Y/n/n, I am actually super impressed with your progress” The stocky man patted you on the back genuinely, bringing a bit of smile to your otherwise grimacing face. He went over the chat to Tom about some boy shit that you couldn’t care less about, allowing you a couple minutes to get your breath back. As soon as you did and tried to dismount the machine of death, your ruined legs seemed to have other plans, shakily buckling so you ended up starfished on the floor, groaning at the dull ache that came with the sudden movement. 

And what show of concern did Duffy show you? A belly laugh that echoed round Toms indoor gym making you groan again, throwing your forearm over your eyes. It was in fact the curly haired brunette, who came and knelt by your side, wordlessly balling up the towel and placing it under your head as you shot your eyes open in shock. 

“You okay? Sorry… I might’ve taken our friendly competition a bit too far.”

“I just… just might have to gain the power of flight this afternoon cos my legs aren’t gonna bloody work.” Tom chuckled and shook his head at your dry humour. 

“Oh I’m sure we can talk to Jon and get that arranged… not like Marvel don’t spend years crafting the script and storyline for a newbie actor to change it all.”

“Might I remind you… they wouldn’t have to if your weren’t such a dickhead!” You exclaimed, sitting up and staring at him with an exasperated look than only made him burst out laughing again. 

“I’m sorry I’m sorry… I just cant take you seriously when you look like such a tomato!” His voice went an octave higher as he laughed at himself, the situation getting even worse for you when you heard Duffy join in too. 

The boy was bloody lucky you couldn’t lift your arms right now, otherwise they’s almost certainly be attempting to ruin his pretty boy face. 

/////////////////////////////

After a long day of shooting you and Tom were in one of the set buggies, being taken back to your trailers to change for the evening. There was a peaceful silence until Tom ruined it yet again.

“ Got any fancy plans for this evening then?”

“Well you know me, back to my lonely little old place and  frozen pizza - so living the movie star life.” 

“It’s a Friday! You not going out with your team or anything?” He sounded so bemused at your quiet plans, and mention of a ‘team’ had you cocking your head to the side. 

“‘My team?’ Tom until I get my movie star pay check I can barely afford my pizzas, never mind a whole persons wage.” You were still only three weeks into filming and although you spent an hour every other morning sweating your ass off with Tom - apart from that you’d tried not to impose yourself on him too much. You didnt want to look clingy and naturally Tom always had a mountain of people vying for his attention - you would go to the back of a long line. So honestly, you were still a bit of a mystery to him, right now you’d both only scratched the surface on each other. 

“Really? I know this is your first big job but I thought you’d have someone here?” 

“Nah… I mean I’ve kinda clung to the Marty on the camera crew but he’s going to see family tonight sooo.”

“Come back to mine. I’ve swapped Harry for his twin Sam, which is a bit of an upgrade cos Sam’s a chef. He just arrived last night. I bet he can one up any pizza you were planning on.”

“Honestly I don’t want to impose, sorry I didnt mean for this to be a pity party or-“ The buggy slowed to a stop and Tom instantly vaulted out of it, standing right infront of you and blocking you exist off the back sofa. Both of you were still in costume, Tom in latex and you in your corset-esque two piece, but then both wrapped in matching long line black jackets supplied by set. 

“No come on I’m serious… Sam’s dying to meet you and it’d be good to spend more time together. You know, cos of chemistry and all.” The last bit was a switch from his cool and smooth, normally easy going tone - into something a bit more… anxious? Just like that, before your brain even knew what it was doing, you agreed, smiling broadly and nodding. 

So barely an hour later, you were knocking on the doors to Tom’s mansion-ish rented Atlanta home which was much much more grand than what the studio had arranged for you. Even though you were here most mornings, this time it felt different. Yeh it was stupid, but you can’t help the way you feel and you were stressed. For no real reason… just, just because. 

Thankfully, it wasn’t awkward at all  and you especially instantly hit it off with his younger brother Sam. Everything just felt easy and simple which meant so much more considering you’d felt so isolated an alone halfway across the world for your home comforts. Being British too, simply chatting to the two young men about your hometown and growing up was just so familiar, it really helped you feel less homesick.  Naturally too,  you’d fallen into a casual and friendly ribbing of Tom with Sam, making the three of you spend to majority of the evening cracking up (or in Tom’s case pouting at the abuse). It was a nice change from the two on one attack you got from Tom and Duffy that morning. You’d all cooked dinner together… well no, you and Tom had stood idly watching Sam cook an amazing chicken curry dish - which he promised to give you the recipe too. Honestly Sam felt like your long lost best friend, especially when it came to your shared ability to berate Tom for anything and everything. 

About an hour ago Tom had stuck on the film, effectively shutting up you and Sam - thankfully for him since Sam was just about to get to some rather embarrassing stories of Tom as a kid. You and Tom were on the longer grey sofa; with Sam sat  the other side of the coffee table in an impressively soft armchair - looking as though it was swallowing the lanky boy. The calm, the silence and the comfort was only going to go one way for you though. After your workout this morning, plus all the running and jumping during the shoot,  after what had already been a pretty intense week, it was hardly surprising that you didn’t even notice yourself drifting off the sleep. 

Who did notice though? Perhaps your brown haired costar who’d been stealing glances across to you ever since the movie had been put on? Because as much as he hated to admit it to himself, this didnt seem to be panning out as a normal job. A normal job is something you put your all into, for a couple weeks, and then leave with good memories and a good pay check. Yes, he had only known your for a matter of weeks or so but it already seemed to be unfathomable to cut ties with you. How would he go without your kind mannered abuse everyday? You were just refreshing, new and mysterious. And Tom was more than intrigued, his interest was peaked. 

And it was stupid to feel like that…. Of course it was. You can’t fancy a colleague because things get complicated and awkward. Tom knew that. 

Then why was he now delicately draping a blanket over your frame and smiling smally when you hummed in your sleep, in what seemed to be a show of appreciation for the layer of warmth? 

Because you were his excited puppy of a costar who is giving everything she has for the job? Because he is worried and wants to look after you? Because he cares? 

No matter why, in that moment you were contented and as was Tom. Oh and Sam? 

Sam saw the tell tale signs in his brother. He saw the way Tom had been touching your arm or the small of your back just a little more than what would be considered normal while he’d been cooking. He’d seen the way Tom had been laughing purely because you had. His eldest brother never did anything rash, it was always a painfully slow process for everyone involved. But Sam thought this just might be the start of something. The start of a slow burn.

[azrielsribbon]

!!! A COURT OF SILVER FLAME SPOILERS !!!

Alternatively, Asli finished the book in like six hours and has many, many thoughts.

ON THE TOPIC OF NESTA, SOME CASSIAN AND NESSIAN AS A WHOLE.

holy shit. this is a lot.

She has grown so much, and I mean that by the little things.

I love that sjm didn’t make it so she was addicted to the wine and sex

Okay I understand Nesta was frustrating sometimes because she really was stubborn but some of the shit Cassian said was really out of line. Especially when he screamed that no one like fucking liked her.

Cassian was down so bad this entire book and I knew that the moment he said he hadn’t bed a female in two years. He was STARVINGGG

Her determination in getting down those stairs, I probably wouldve tested myself down a window or something.

I liked how she bonded with the House. It was a refreshing, different take on loneliness and finding a friend.

The House and how it looked after her. It was the biggest thing in her journey.

One theme I see in Nesta a lot is self sabotage, especially when it means the safety of others. She’s ready to throw herself in front of them.

Her banter with Cassian was really nice to read.

WHEN SHE MENTIONED HAVING A THREESOME TWICE I DIED

Cassian and his backstory was rip. It was really sad thinking about how little kid Cass really regretted some of the things that even he couldn’t control.

sjm did not disappoint with inner thoughts. Those were really refreshing.

She wasn’t vividly jealous or furious at Mor and Cassian’s friendship and I really liked that take.

Cassian’s silent jealously when Helion tries to flirt with Nesta and she dodged it LMAOOO

When Cassian kisses her in front of their family to help her get out of the map

Her silent bond with Az! That kept me going honestly. He was a sly bastard sometimes.

Sometimes I really questioned somethings, like those fast smut scenes but that’s just my preference.

Her marching down to Amren’s after she finds out they voted against her having the weapons she Made

Not to mention how she told Feyre about the baby and the labor risk out of anger, that really hurt both of them and me.

When she stayed silent during her punishment hike with Cassian. Each thought tore me apart.

When he warned her about falling and she was glad he didn’t see the expression on her face. How she didn’t mind if she fell down and how it would better.

When she cried after all those days of silence and finally told him how she felt underneath all that.

He softened up fast too and blamed himself for not realizing all this time why she hated the fire.

Can we talk about that dancing scene with Eris? And how Cassian was secretly exploding on the side as he remembered her mother wanted her to marry a Prince just like Eris.

WHEN ERIS ASKED RHYS WHAT HE WANTED IN EXCHANGE FOR NESTA TO BE HIS BRIDE AFTER LIKE A COUPLE DANCED LMAOO

The Solstice scene had my heart. The gift Az got Nesta and how she hugged him after he told her about it. How Cassian smiled at the sight.

HOW CASS GOT HER A LITTLE MUSIC BOX RECORDED WITH THE MUSIC FROM THE BALLROOM AND HOW HE ASKED THE MUSICIANS TO PERFORM IT FOR HIM AFTER EVERYONE LEFT SO HE COULD GET IT FOR HERRRR

They really kept shit away from each other till it exploded in an argument and that’s a reoccurring theme with this book couple.

WHAT MADE ME SO FRUSTRATED WAS HOW HE WANTED TO STAY IN HER BED AFTER SEX AND SHE WANTED TO CUDDLE BUT THEY DIDNT SAY ANYTHING AND ASSUMED THE OTHER DIDNT WANT IT

The topic of mates was RUSHED. Like I mean really rushed. First they argue, he says shackled and then the next time they get to speak (after the forced Blood Rite and labor scene) they accept it? I dont know, it didn’t sit with me.

I wish Nesta would elaborate on why she didn’t believe in Mates even more and Cassian would actually listen for once. Again, rushed.

The ending was fast paced in my opinion. We could’ve really had more to go off of, I needed more domestic Nessian.

ON THE TOPIC OF NESTA, GWYN, EMERIE

I am obsessed with Gwyn, Emerie and their friendship with Nesta.

I love how Gwyn and Nesta started, both gritting their teeth and still appreciating that aspect of each other.

How Nesta raced to help her with a book even when their first encounter wasn’t the friendliest.

Gwyn being persistent in paying back her small debt. I love her.

When Gwyn applied to defense lessons after Nesta defended them from the scholar priestess.

Emerie, my homegirl. I love her to death. The way she easily befriends Nesta, how Nesta stands up for her when her cousin comes to bother her.

I don’t know if it was just me, but Emerie and Mor might possibly be something. Either good friends or interested lovers.

THE WAY EMERIE BONDED OVER SMUTTY NOVELS WITH THE OTHER GIRLS AND LET THEM BORROW HER STUFFFFFF

Gwyn helping Nesta with her research on Valkyries. Muah.

Gwyn and Az, I feel like something might happen here and if it does, I do not want any Elriel drama getting dragged in, MY GIRL GWYN HAS BEEN THROUGH ENOUGH OKAY

Gwyn thinking she doesn’t deserve the purity jewel the other priestesses wear and her backstory honestly just broke me. She endured so much.

Emerie and everything she lost. Her mother, her brother, her wings and any dreams she had of flying. How she distracts herself with work and gardening to keep that off her mind.

The way the girls all developed inside jokes, jokingly hanged up on Cassian at training and always had Nesta’s back.

The way they were dedicated to each other even during the Rite when they couldve let one another behind and won.

HER SISTERSSS I CRIED I WOULD DIE FOR THIS MF TRIOOOO

ON THE TOPIC OF THE INNER CIRCLE + THE ARCHERON PARENTS

Fey-ruh was pregoooo she and Rhys raw dogged it

I felt really really bad when no one fucking told her she would die because the baby had wings and she wasn’t fit to give birth like that. Like. What.

Can we talk about how they fucked when Feyre was in her Illyrian form and didn’t think the thing through?

Rhys, I can’t stand the guy. First he wants to make a bargain with his mate that they die together and then he wants to keep it from her that she can die when giving birth to their kid.

I think what pissed me off the most was when he was trying to help Cassian get Nesta out of a nightmare/power “episode” and had to experience what she did with the Cauldron and seeing Elain and Cassian hurt. He said he knew she was feeling something but seeing and feeling it yourself was different. Yeah, what else did you think smartass.

Rhys has a habit of keeping important shit secret, Amren is no better either. I think that’s what pissed me off the most. They sometimes kept the too important shit away.

As much as Nesta grew, so did Feyre. They both developed pretty good in my mind, I don’t hate her as much as I despise Rhys sometimes. All and all I love how she and Nesta ended up.

Amren....I get her point about Nesta using and abusing their friendship. At the same time, sometimes she was too harsh.

Elain, darling old cottage core aesthetic Elain. I found her to be a little insufferable sometimes. How she showed up unexpectedly at the Library to talk to Nesta and they got into an argument was funny to me since Nesta pulled out some stuff on her.

ELAIN THANKING NESTA AND SAYING FINALLY AFTER SHE TELLS HER TO “OH FUCK OFF” AT THE SOLSTICE PARTY WAS SO RANDOM

Elain and Lucien is some fucked up shit. I understand how she doesn’t want to acknowledge the fact that they’re mates and all that but you can atleast thank the guy when he gives you a gift on Solstice.

I feel bad for Lucien because as sweet as Elain might show to be, she’s really hurting him and could just reject him if she really doesn’t want him.

AZ AZ AZ I LOVE HIM AND HIS SLY MOMENTS

Az when he cockblocks is the best thing. Do it more often.

Az and Nesta’s bond is something I want to see more, as well as how she literally thought about a threesome with him and Cassian.

Morriiiiigan. Everyone mentions her beauty and how she’s like the sun walking and I admire that. She wasn’t as annoying as I thought she’d be on the topic of Nesta and Cassian being an item.

She also wasn’t in the book as much which made sense since she was in Vallahan. I did like how she accepted Nessian towards the end.

The long awaited Mrs Archeron. Some of my theories about her proved true! About how she groomed her daughters into marriage ideologies at the worst age. 12 and 11? What the fuck?

The way she called Elain a pretty thing with no ambition at 11, no wonder Nesta and Elain have no proper knowledge of survival like Feyre did. She was set on making sure Nesta married someone who would treat her well, Elain married someone rich since her beauty was beyond all three of them.

Literally Mrs Archeron was not okay LMAOOO why are you telling your daughters this when they haven’t even bled yet damn CHILL

I felt bad since she didn’t care for Feyre and only their father doted on Elain and Feyre. Nesta was kept all to her mother to feed off Mrs Archeron’s narcissism.

Not to mention she died a year later

I found it funny Elain mentioned how at 15, Nesta even had their dad fearing her. Like it’s your daughter, wdym you fear her

The backstory on how Nesta treated him and how she feels now looking back. It was saddening and I unfortunately know the regret of not doing somethings. It must eat her alive.

I enjoyed reading this book, even if I wasn’t content with the ending. I tabbed a LOT of things so you’ll probably catch me editing and adding more to this in the morning. Thank you for reading all the way down here! 🤍

[1littleshippergirl1]

A look inside his world

Summary: Oliver finds out a few things about Marcus

@raviliuz I hope you enjoy it!

--

1. His friends

Of course he had friends. Most people did. Even Slytherins. Still, Oliver hadn't fathomed that Marcus did, given his general demeanor. He always seemed like he didn't, or rather, that he didn't care if he did or not. But he did.

Adrian was the closest thing to a brother he had. He was a year younger, in Oliver's year and the complete opposite of Marcus. Quiet, studious, kinder than anyone else in his house; Oliver had heard other students refer to him as the Hufflepuff of Slytherin.

Marcus was protective of Adrian. Oliver learned that some of the Slytherins would try to bully Adrian for his different views and attitude, which they found revolting for a Slytherin. But Marcus, he'd use the fact that most students were afraid of him to his advantage. Honestly, that part puzzled Oliver. Marcus wasn't very big, height wise-he was around his size-and his muscles weren't remarkably; but Oliver despised bullying so if that made everyone else leave Adrian alone then so be it.

They did almost everything together: class, meals, quidditch, hung around the outside or common room together. Oliver saw a tenderness between them that Marcus usually reserved for him, few and far between at that. He wasn't really affectionate, being that, until Oliver came around, he didn't receive it and even now, he would grow visibly uncomfortable, wearing an awkward that was rather unsettling for Oliver to see. However, there were times when Marcus would lightly nudged Adrian or ruffle his hair in a quick manner, just barely messing it up.

It had also been thoroughly important to Marcus that Oliver and Adrian get to know each other. It wasn't so much that he asked Oliver, either. Rather, he told him that Adrian would be at the Three Broomsticks and he was to join him at seven, no later.

2. His personality

Many people thought they knew Marcus with just a few words: cheater, angry, troll.

But Marcus was more than that (and he didnt have any troll blood in him. Oliver asked and took his boyfriend's eye roll as a no); once they were alone, away from the prying eyes and ears and gossipy students who had nothing better to do, he would then let his guard down. It allowed Oliver to see a softer side.

Granted, he was no romeo. He didn't make it a habit of calling Oliver affectionate nicknames, he wasn't the sort to plan elaborate dates or do more than pull Oliver into his side, awkwardly patting his back when he was upset. Actually, he was still a git ninety-nine percent of the time, being one of the many, many reasons that they fought.

But still, the side was something that Oliver saw. He was less tense, the anger would subside slightly and he actually relaxed. Sometimes, rarely, he'd lay his head in Oliver's lap, nearly falling asleep from the fingers that would thread through his hair absentmindedly.

Beyond that, few things had changed once they got together. He was still wildly competitive, still bragged about his house's win if they achieved one and, funny enough, worked his team harder than Oliver worked his, feeling as though he needed to impress him. It was amusing to Oliver, who would try to suppress a snicker.

3. His family

Marcus didn't have the best family. Oliver pitied him, having come from a family that valued togetherness and love.

Marcus' parents were cold, so unlike his own. They threatened to disown their son if he made any other house than Slytherin, and practically put him in the hospital when they learned he had to come back for another year. They were regularly smacking him around, making snide remarks and on a few occasions, using the cruciatus curse on him.

Oliver had been horrified to find that information out from Adrian. His first instinct was to find Marcus and hold him tight as he could, making fierce declarations of his love. Of course, he couldn't. Marcus would know that Adrian had blabbed and he was the last person who wanted pity.

So, for the longest time, he didn't mention. Didn't mention that he knew of the secrets that Marcus had tried to hide, that explained his aversion to touching and disassociation with happiness and love. He never had it to begin with.

Oliver made it a point of hugging him a second longer, telling him he loved him an extra time or two, genuinely complimenting. Stuff like that. It was all he could do and Marcus never suspected a thing (although he would give him a strange look from time to time).

4. His views

Before they'd gotten together, by pushing from both Adrian and Percy, who were up to here with exasperation, Oliver thought he knew how Marcus thought, what he believed.

All Slytherins believed in blood purity and would follow You-Know-Who till their dying day. That's what Oliver thought that Marcus was about and never thought that, perhaps, it might be different.

Marcus, as it turned out, didn't think that way. He was more neutral. He didn't think muggleborns were any less powerful, somehow beneath him and had never uttered the word "mudblood" except for the sake of keeping up appearances. He also learned that both Marcus and Adrian disliked the Malfoy spawn greatly and were more than annoyed that he replaced Higgs as seeker, seeing as he wasn't even that good.

Other than Adrian and Oliver, himself, no one else could know. There was too big of a risk for that to happen, should his family or some other family that was supportive of You-Know-Who come to find out. He'd be killed, dumped somewhere carelessly without a second thought.

For now, until it became safer, until the day he had to let the world know where his true loyalties were, he had to keep them hidden.

5. His intelligence

Most people believed that Marcus was stupid, especially for having to repeat a year, something of which had not happened for who knows how long in Hogwarts history.

But Oliver knew better. His boyfriend wasn't stupid or lazy or whatever else the students rumored him to be. He just didn't get it, it didn't click so easily like it did for students like Percy or the Granger girl.

If only he wasn't so stubborn and would accept help. Percy had offered to tutor him in the various subjects that he was having difficulty in (which was all of them), but Marcus vehemently refused, looking like he wanted to throttle Percy. Luckily, Oliver stepped in, thanking Percy on behalf of Marcus before any of that could happen.

Oliver knew why, why he didn't accept help and avoided any talk about the subject by shutting it down instantly-he was embarrassed. Marcus tried not to let it show, acting as if he was indifferent to the whole thing, almost glad because now he had another year of quidditch and could graduate with Oliver and Adrian, but when it really came down to it, he was angry.

Angry at himself for letting this happen. Angry for how stupid he felt he was and angry at everyone else that whispered to their friends, snickering at him and his situation.

That whole year, while simultaneously strategizing about winning the quidditch cup, Oliver had been determined to assist Marcus in his school work. He was the only one, on occasion Adrian, too, that could coax Marcus into letting him check over what he'd written or practice a spell by making it into a competition.

And it worked well. Marcus just needed a little help. That year, he managed to get a total of seven N.E.W.T.S and had been very proud (in his own Marcus way) to mail the letter to Oliver after he received it.

--

Marcus Flint was not what Oliver expected him to be. The angry brute on the quidditch field was only a small part of him. He was loyal to those that earned his trust. He was cunning in his own right. He was smart in those areas he'd been able to master such as Defense.

And later on, a few years later, when he, Adrian, Oliver and Percy fought side by side during the battle, he showed his bravery, fighting against his own father.

[oh-for-fic-sake]

It All Worked Out In The End

When the parents are away the kids will play... or fight one of the two.

I am genuinely have a too much fun with these imagines.

Masterlist

Warninngs: Swearing ,Mentions of fighting ,Hinting at Drugging and Rape (nothing explicit)

Jaskier stood befor you in your rented room dunking the bloodied rag into a jug of cool water before wringing it out then lightly dabbing your eye brow and angry claw marks on your face. Ciri stood off to the side apprehensive watching the bard tend to the wound.

"Got her good tho didnt i?" He smirked at that trying so hard to be disappointed in you but he really couldnt. 

"Yes I even won a bit of coin, lets just hope the other two dont come back until this has gone down we can explain the black eye and cut but not the scratches."

"Yeah ... I still have all my teeth tho!" Cheerful in your victory utterly pleased with yourself Ciri shook her head at this then spoke up in disbelief.

"Where did that even come from?" You grinned wincing again as it hurt the bruises that were forming on your cheek and jaw.

"Well my sweet Cirilla a few years of pent up anger can do wonders for your right hook or in my case bitch slap" She snorted relaxing as she saw that you were to all intents and purposes unharmed. She wandered over to the bags on the chair by the bed.

"Wait Jask did you say coin? You put coin down?" Jaskier shrugged in response to your question dipping the rag in to the water again.

"Hey they started taking bets at the bar, I wasnt gonna join in but then looked at you , there was no way you werent gonna put her down ,your face looked a lot like Geralts growley face"  He swiped over your face one last time there was a pregnant pause.

"So you gonna split the coin?"

"Nope" He said popping the p dropping the now pink cloth with a wet slap on the table. Your younger sister from another mister walked back over to you with a small vial. Poppy milk or better known to you as morphine.

"Yennefer left us some poppy milk for emergencies, you should take some now before you really start feeling it.How are we going to keep this from them?" Waving a hand motioning to your damaged face as Jaskier prepaird the medicine. If you were honest you didnt think that far ahead at the time you just needed to ko that Bitch -which you did thank you very much- but you knew what Ciri was getting at Geralt and Yennefer were a couple of mother hens... allbeit slightly more intimidating... and dangerous... and volatile. 

"Not sure we can" You replied nodding greatfully at Jaskier who offered cup of water that held a dose of the pain killer. Knocking it back before pulling faces at the bitter taste.

"Oh god! Ugh no" you shook your head befor quickly eating a cube of cheese from the small platter in front of you. The singer shrugged ignoring your outbust looking between the both of you.

"All i do know is that your going to be in trouble when they do find out" He said in a sing song voice you slumped back in the chair grunting.

"Oh yer how'd you figure its just me in shit Jask" Sputtering he glared at you

"Maybe because your the one who decided to turn savage and attack a whore! You even bit her bit" You tapped a pointing finger on the table

"Ok fisrt things first she hit me first got a strict rule never throw the fisrt punch but allways throw the last and second yeah fair enough i bit her but she was fighting dirty. And you could have pulled me off her, you also placed a bet on me which was encouraging it.If im going down your coming with me." He gaped at you in disbelief.

"What about her she didn't intervene either?" 

"She also didn't bet on me."

"I don't think Geralt himself could have dragged y/n off her" Ciri quipped from the side lines you nodded at her continuing.

"Not only that im pretty sure they left you in charge bard so really when you think about it its all your fault" He pailed as you and Ciri high fived.

"I need to lie down" Wobbling to the bed flopping on it face first.You and Ciri shared a look after a few beats of silence befor being asked the enevitable question 

"So how did it start anyway?" 

"Thats what id like to know" Came from the bed as Jaskier sat up.

"Not really sure she was just running her mouth i geuss" You lied patting her head befor freighning tirednes making your way to the other bed deciding that she never has to know the real reason to you cat fighting with a whore. A few days later after the scratches and swelling had faded the others returned they hastily made their way up to the room. Geralt started speaking as he stormed through the door.

"Can some one explain to me why iv just had to pay for a whores loss of earnings And medical costs?" You balked

"Loss of earnings I knocked out her teeth surely shes making double on blowies" Jaskier snorted into his mug

"What the fuck happened?" Geralt growled out not finding your comment amusing in the slightest as he saw the clawed bruised cheek, blackened eye and cut on your brow he quickly gave Ciri and Jaskier the once over fearing youd all been attacked, relife flooded him when he saw they were ok . Yennefer gasped striding past the seething witcher stopping in front of you placing a soothing hand on you uninjured cheek.

"Who did this?" She whispered you beamed at her nuzzling into her palm.

"Dont worry I dealt with it. Besides I got off lightly you should see my opponent" Ciri nodded in agreement befor breifly explaining.

"Y/n had a fight with a whore, beat her into the ground actually then knocked her out with a single back hander. Was quite immpressive to watch"

"Made a satisfying sound to" Jaskier added Geralt looked between the three of you.

"So Y/n had a cat fight with a whore?" You all nodded

"And did enough damage to not only knock out teeth but keep her out of work for a few days?" The three of you shared a look and nodded the hunter sighed a deep breath crossing him arms.

"Do i want to know what started it?" 

"Probably not" was you offered choosing once again to keep the fact it was for Ciri's sake to yourself, trying to trick you in to selling yourself for a night was one thing but planning to drug and sell Ciri was a completely different ball game. She was family.No one was getting away with that not on your watch its lucky you caught on to the hushed conversation. You dont want to think about what could have happend if you hadnt been paying attention. Geralt threw his hand up looking towards Yennefer when it was clear none of you were going to elaborate any more then that. Aproaching he droped his swords and bag taking Yenns place tilting your face to inspect your wounds.

"Well they didnt do much damage or manage to fracture anything ,even your nose which is good." He leaned in kissing your forhead chasetly. As yenn preceeded to pull you over to where her bag was on the bed with a healing balm in hand stippling it over the cut on your face.

"Fighting a whore honestly, can't leave you alone for a few days with out you getting into trouble. I hope you know your in trouble missy" She muttered as she flitted threw her bag then began fussing over your split knuckles applying a different ointment.

"And the money we had to give her for this whole incident is comming out of your allowance starting today" Geralt grunted from the table Jaskier and Ciri watched in peels of laughter as you tried squirming away from the sorceress pleading with the unimpressed white haired male you continued protesting at Geralt's decision until he pinned you with a stern look that shut you up. Yeah he wasnt a happy camper.

"And your grounded from singing bard" Jaskier stopped laughing 

"What?"

"you were told to take care of them and it doesnt take an idiot to guess why this is considerably heavier you dont make this much from singing alone" he growled out lifting up jaskiers bulging coin pouch .All in all the couple took it better than any of you thought they would, you were relieved they didnt push the issue as if they knew what had kicked it off they probaly would have burnt that whore house to the ground, whores and all... Jaskier did share his winnings tho so it all worked out in the end,Jaskier made a weeks worth of coin in a night, you saved Ciri ,let out some pent up aggression and Geralt didnt have kill anyone.

[smolslothloaf]

Yo as the only Micheal Crew fan (prolly), can I just say I’m so fucking salty that he died how he did?

Homeboy’s been hinted at since the fourth episode in this entire goddamn series, he’s been repeatedly connected to the Leitner books (which I guess are less important now that we’ve met Jurgen Leitner and we’ve got Gerard but uggggghhhh), he’s got a cool lightning scar and backstory and everything!

And once we get to meet him? He’s so intriguing-he ‘s polite even as he forces Jon to just fall through the air, he has a great voice (both literally and writing wise), and once he explains his backstory it doesn’t dissapoint. You get the image of this scared child whose been searching for protection and meaning his whole life. This creature’s been following him ever since he’s gotten his lightning scar, you kinda get that it’s the personification of his past even if he connects it all back to the Vast. To an extent, he kinda describes his relationship with his scar and his journey in self discovery all as both finding meaning and acceptance in the Vast. The moment he figures out what’s been calling to him is also the moment he accepts his past and his trauma. It all makes sense and comes together.

What I also find particularly interesting the way he laments about never being able to remember the most important events of his life, as I feel it’s something we all can relate to. Traumatic or not, negative or positive, many of us have trouble recalling the most life-changing events of our lives. We feel frustrated over this, we beat ourselves up for it, it’s just apart of life. In Mike’s statement this is such a small detail but it’s one that resonates with me deeply.

They set up Micheal Crew in such an engaging light and make him feel so real. I will admit that I’m not sure how much more they could do with him as this episode tied up pretty much all loose ends in his story. That being said, I would’ve absolutely LOVED to see more of him! He has an intruging personality, a cool backstory, he could’ve been a neat reaccuring character or something.

But no! Daisy Fucking Tonner just needsa bust down the fucking door and be like “YO THIS BITCH HUMAN?” And Jon’s like “uhhh ig not” and Daisy’s like “WELL THAT MEANS HES GONNA CATCH THESE HANDS.” AND JUST FUCKING SHOOTS HIM???

FUCK THAT NOISE.

YOU BUILD UP A CHARACTER OVER THE COURSE OF THREE SEASONS, WE MEET HIM AND HE GIVES US HIS LIFE STORY, THERES STILL SOME ROOM FOR HIM TO GIVE US ANSWERS OR SOME SHIT, THEN YOU HAVE THE A U D A C I T Y TO JUST YEET DAISY IN AND HAVE HER SHOOT HIM OUTSIDE?

O K A Y

LIKE,,, IG THEY NEEDED TO SET UP DAISY’S STORY AND GET MICHEAL OUT OF THE STORY OR SOME SHIT BUT. NOT LIKE THIS PLEASE?? IM FULLY WILLING TO ACCEPT THAT IM JUST UNREASONABLY SALTY ABOUT THIS BUT SERIOUSLY?? SHE JUST. SHOWS UP. SHOOTS HIM. THREATENS JON. BITCHES FOR AWHILE AND WE’RE SUPPOSED TO BE OKAY WITH IT?

MICHEALS NOT EVEN BROUGHT UP AFTER THAT HE KINDA JUST GOT SHOVED TO THE SIDE FOR IMPORTANT PEOPLE PLOT(tm). HE GETS. PUSHED. TO. THE. SIDE. IN. HIS OWN. FUCKING, EPISODE. WASNT JON GONNA QUESTION HIM MORE? WASNT THAT WHY JON WAS THERE? I MEAN I GUESS HE COULDNT CUZ MICHEAL COULDDA DEFO KILLED HIM, BUT HE DIDNT EVEN DROP ANY BREAD CRUMBS FOR JON’S INVESTIGATION. JON LITERALLY GOT JACK SHIT FROM THAT INTERACTION ASIDES FOR MORE FUEL FOR HIS STATEMENT KINK. AS FAR AS THE PLOT’S CONCERNED, JON DIDN’T NEED THE CONTENTS OF MIKE’S STATMENT. THE KNOWELDGE WAS GOOD BUT HE GOT NO FURTHER ON HIS INVESTIGATION OF THE STRANGER. HE WAS DIRECTED TO MIKES DOOR FOR THE PLOT BUT THE PLOT AINT THERE, THE PLOTS AT DAISYS HOUSE

TO REVIEW:

THEY

DEADASS

JUST

THREW MICHEAL CREW IN THERE

HAD HIM EXPLAIN HIS BACKSTORY

THEN KILLED HIM OFF

AFTER HYPING HIM UP

FOR

THREE

FUCKING

SEASONS

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???

ARE YOU ACTUALLY FUCKING KIDDING ME???

YA KNOW THATS PROLLY THE ONE BIG BONE IVE GOTTA PICK WITH THIS SHOW. THEY BUILD UP INTERESTING CHARACTERS OVER THE COURSE OF FULL SEASONS, THEN THEY’RE ONLY GIVEN THEIR TIME TO SHINE FOR ONE EPISODE BEFORE BEING ADRUPTLY KILLED OFF AND NEVER MENTIONED AGAIN. I HEARD IT GETS BETTER BUT ITS A PRETTY BIG PROBLEM FOR THE FIRST TWO SEASONS.

JANE PRENTISS COULDDA BEEN COOL! AND SHE WAS COOL! BUT SHE ONLY ACTUALLY DID SHIT FOR ONE EPISODE THEN WAS KILLED WITH LITTLE RESISTANCE. SHE DIDNT EVEN MAKE A COMEBACK OR ANYTHING, THEY REALLY JUST WENT “THAT BITCH DEAD AND DID JACK SHIT” AFTER HYPING HER UP THE WHOLE SEASON. LIKD OKAY SURE GO OFF. THEYRE BUILDING UP BREEKON AND HOPE A BIT MORE NOW, CANT WAIT FOR THEM TO BE KILLED OFF AS SOON AS WE MEET THEM.

LIKE I GET IT I GET IT. MICHEALS STORY WAS COMPLETE. NOT EVERY CHARACTER NEEDS TO BE PLOT RELEVANT. NOT EVERY CHARACTER THATS BUILT UP NEEDS AN ELABORATE PLOT. NOT EVERY CHARACTER NEEDS A SATISFYING SEND OFF.

BUT IM STILL FUCKING MAD ABOUT IT CUZ I FEEL NOTHING. I LOVED HIS STATEMENT AND IT WOULD’VE JUST BEEN FINE IF MICHEAL WAS JUST LEFT ALONE AFTER THAT OR SOMETHING. OR HELL HE EVEN COULD’VE BEEN KILLED IN A DIFFERENT WAY I JUST HATE HOW DAISY CAME IN THERE OUT OF BUTTFUCK NO WHERE, SHOT A GUY SHE BARELY KNEW CUZ “he spoopy” AND ITS JUST NEVER BROUGHT UP. MIKE DIDNT EVEN NEED TO BE THERE. JON WENT THERE FOR ANSWERS, MIKE GAVE HIM NOTHING CUZ INSTEAD OF HAVING AN INTERESTING LITTLE CONVERSATION, DAISY NEEDED HER CHARACTER ARC. IM REPEATING MYSELF AT THIS POINT BUT IM JUST SO FUCKING ANGY ABOUT THIS.

FUCK DAISY, ALL COPS ARE BASTARDS

I am fully aware that I’ll wake up tomorrow and deem all of this as invalid and unreadable, I just needed to get this all off my chest. In all honesty the main reason I’m upset is because the Vast is my personal favorite entity and Micheal’s statement is a good summation of why

People affected by the Vast are just that-people. Well, all statement givers are people, but the Vast’s statments I find are much more grounded and down to Earth. They aren’t as out there or over the top like the Corruption or the Stranger. They’re just little ‘tweaks’ in someone’s perspective that shakes their core. It takes mundane occurances and pushes them to their extreme. All the Vast did in “High Pressure” was make someone feel as though they were sinking forever and forced them underwater. It’s some you could probably picture happening to yourself more clearly then say, being attacked by War Ghosts. (NOT bashing on War Ghosts btw, they’re just a different brand of spooky.) The type of fear that the Vast victims have is also kinda different to me. I’m not sure how well I can explain it but best I can describe it is that it feels like geunine trauma that someone with that phobia would experience? I still don’t think that’s quite right but take “A Long Way Down” for instance, where the statement giver’s brother suffers from Acrophobia. That’s a real boy with Acrophobia! I feel who he is as an actual person as I follow his life, I know his worst nightmare, and once you see what happens to him, you completely feel both from him and his brother. Or in “Freefall” where you see a mother mourn for her son’s trauma and death. She saw something he loved suddenly turn him so, so afraid then saw the very thing he feared swallow him up.

It’s just any average person greiving their loved one’s trauma or being pushed to a limit you can see yourself being pushed to. It’s all very grounded in reality and makes it all feel that more real. And I feel like Micheal Crew’s statement just summed that up so well. He’s such a perfect face for what I love about the Vast. He’s just a person at his core, who was scared and needed guidance.

It’s just that the way it ended and how adruptly he was killed left a sour taste in my mouth.

[doyouknowhowtowaltz]

⭐⭐

Thank you so much, I have been actually dying with how much I want to talk about Of Swords Ravens and Alliances.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/24397234

This is long so, more under cut

Firstly, this was not originally part of my drawn out political saga that I am slowly expanding on. The first part of this with Enoch and the Beast chilling in the barn and talking out in the field was written before the political saga became a thing I realized I was doing.

It was initially a story where Enoch and the Beast had a cup of tea and chatted, I didnt like the Beast’s characterization so it never got published. It sort of sat in my drafts for a while and then I wrote the scene with the Beast tricking the raven woman to the song God Hunter by the aviators. That story did not have any opening or any closing it was just that scene, it wasn't even the fight.

While I was working on that story to make it longer I wrote the scene where Enoch gets injured in the first place. 

Now, to take a small detour, I don't write WIPs in separate documents, I write them in one document and separate half finished scenes with -- and stories with extra space between the start and the end. This is because if I focused on one story at a time I’d never finish anything, so I’ll work for a few days on something then scroll through my document find something else to work on. 

These two stories were at the time on top of one another and where I normally separate works there had been a change of page so when I was reading over it I read it as one story. 

(The part where Enoch and the Beast were drinking tea was eventually cut for time and also because I still didn't like the Beast’s characterization)

For a long time it sort of lingered and I picked it back up last September along with another longer story that isn't written yet. They had ended up at the bottom of the WIP document and I moved them closer to the top so I would see them more and work on them more. 

At that point I had sort of established my political world building saga and had realized it was a thing I was now Doing. 

I started using this story to flesh out a couple of ideas and fill plot holes. 

For example, Tzar Spring was made entirely for this story to fill a plot hole. 

In one of my previous stories there's the line ““You are not old enough to remember the death of another one of us.” Lady Midnight says simply.” when Lady Midnight is talking to Lady Spring. 

That line has bothered me for a long time, so I created Tzar Spring as her predecessor, her father. 

Lady Spring is basically a giant spider, so I felt her father should also be insect like, at that point I listened to GHOST’s Honey I’m Home which includes a Praying Mantis in the video, thus Tzar Spring became a praying mantis. 

Even after that he sort of floated in limbo for a little while without having a fully fleshed out character. 

In my notes I have this, I don't actually remember any of this except looking at videos of praying mantises eating (Its horrifying)

“Tzar spring is a Devil’s flower mantis. 

I had a lot of back and forth about this, I considered a couple of different mantises for this, like the violin mantis, glass mantis and the jeweled flower mantis. 

Eventually I came down to a couple main contenders, and they were the ghost mantis, the devil’s flower mantis and the orchid mantis. Though the ghost mantis is the most intimidating of the bunch and fits in the most with what I wanted, it’s camouflage is dead leaves, and I didnt feel it fit well with spring. That left me with the orchid mantis and the devil’s flower mantis, both of which mimic flowers, I chose the devil’s flower mantis in the end because I wanted him to retain some of his gravitas while still being imbued with spring colors without them completly consuming his character.”

So this is sort of what he looks like 

Also he’s like, taller than the Beast.

By the way, I have since better fleshed him out as a character, and he’s going to have a whole story about his death and some of his political machinations.

Both he and Lady Spring, (And Heiress Spring, but she’s never going to become a big fixture in the story) can see prophesy, unfortunately for Tzar Spring he only has one set of eyes which means he’s half blind most of the time overcome by prophesy.

Lets see, what else can I cover about this story.

Ah! The Sword.

So this isn't something made explicitly clear in that story, but there are two stories in the works that are going to explain what the Sword is. 

The Sword is an Artifact, and Adelaide’s Scissors and Whisper’s Bell are also both Artifacts. This is probably never going to be explicitly stated in my stories but the Artifacts are ancient magical items that are cared for by witches. 

There are three sets of three different artifacts. 

The Blades, which include the Sword, the Scissors, and the Dagger

The Adornments, which include the Comb, the Mirror, and the Ribbon

The Tools, which include the Bell, the Needles, and the Cook Pot

All of the objects are with their respective witches except the Sword, which Enoch broke, and the Needles, which is a story I am going to further elaborate on in an AU not connected to the political saga, but in the political saga the Beast has the Needles and cares for them. 

Most of them will never feature in a story though the Dagger might be mentioned.

 Something else I want to touch on is the ravens, because the patrons used to use them to send messages. Only Madame Summer and Enoch actually use their flock to send messages, and not all ravens turn into people. Most of the patrons use the winds to send messages now.

The Unknown is sort of stuck in an impasse, because neither Enoch nor the Beast will attack their fellow patrons and disturb the peace and none of their fellow patrons could best them if it did fall into all out war (Except Lady Midnight, but she’s forfeited the end results, who ever wins may have her domain so long as she is allowed to remain in it and she wont fight) 

Thank you so much Anon, I have been dying to talk about this story for ages.

[1mfa0]

Oh fuck pt 2

Oh fuck pt 1

Fandom : IT

Characters (as of right now) : Riche, Eddie and Bev (+mention of the other losers)

Word count : 1959

Warnings (as of right now) : Excessive swearing, kissing, implied sex, alcohol, minors smoking

Summary of pt 2 : Eddie try’s to make things normal again but he is frfr struggling

Disclaimer : I have never really written anything before but I had a lot of fun with this so I hope you like it!

—-

Tomorrow is the first day of senior year. Richie and Eddie had originally planned to have a sleepover tonight and then go to school in the morning together but they have almost completely stopped talking. Richie has thought about calling Eddie about a million times but he doesn't even know what he would say. Debating back and forth with himself for hours. And then all of the sudden with perfect timing, his phone began to ring.

It was eddie.

“Holy fuck,” he said to himself under his breath.

He lunged for his phone at the end of his bed. Trying to keep his cool staring at it waiting for at least three rings as a desperate attempt to not seem desperate.

He answers.

“Hey Eddie..” His voice cracked.

“Hey Richie, we still on for tonight I rented some movies”

Richie is so thrown off by the calmness in Eddie's voice, why was he actually like nothing happened. Richie didn't have time to think about it but he also didn't care.

“Oh yeah totally. Um uh, my place at 7?”

“Cool see you then.” Eddie hung up.

Richie dropped his phone and proceeded to drop himself down on his bed. Lying on his back, he could not believe what just happened.

---

At 7:00 there was a knock on the door. Richie darted down stairs swinging it open. It was Eddie of course being as punctual as ever. He was wearing gray sweatpants and a fitted maroon crewneck. He looked so much more casual than usual, but he did tend to relax a bit more when it was just them.

“You gonna let me in rich?” he smiled, Richie had been just staring at him for a little too long.

“Oh haha of course Eds.” Richie said, forcing a laugh.

“So how have you been, did you pick out all your classes?” Eddie said he as he was taking off his shoes and setting down the movies he brought on the counter.

“I've been alright, I'm talking public speaking and art, easy As for senior year ya know. And then like all other normal classes.”

“Of course you are” He laughed, god richie missed making him laugh. “I'll take out my schedule later and we can compare to see if we have any classes together.”

“Yeah sure” Richie couldn't help but smile at him.

Once the ball started rolling, it was like nothing had happened. They just talked and laughed for hours. After they ate dinner and the rest of the house was asleep, Richie and Eddie settled down on the couch and started watching a movie. Though the noticeable space between them was normal for teenage boys it was not normal for these too. Normally they would think nothing of just cuddling together with Eddie's legs stretched out over richies, and even though they seemed to be in a good place now, the tension was still pretty high when it came to physical touch. And in an effort to try and break that tension Richie yawned while stretching his arm while putting it around eddie. As he felt Eddie began to shift he was worried he was going to pull away but he slid closer to Richie resting his head on his shoulder. Richie's heart was beating so fast he was worried Eddie could hear it. Neither of them moved until the second movie ended.

Eddie sat up, looking at richie, inches away from his face. “Hey I’m sleepy, I think I wanna go to bed”

“ah eds, as sleepy and adorable as ever.” Richie said pinching Eddie's cheek.

“Oh fuck off rich.” Eddie said, trying to hide his smile. Though he was unsuccessful making richie grin like a kid opening his Christmas presents. His eyes dropped to Eddie's lips, he swallowed hard and sat up fast when he realised what he was doing.

“Um uh we can go to bed.”

“No I don’t want to,” Eddie said leaning into Richie wrapping his arms around him and laying his head on his chest, “I just wanna stay right here.”

Richie didn't know what to say, so he just got comfortable putting his arms around Eddie and they both fell asleep.

---

Luckily Eddie already had an alarm set on his phone so they woke up with enough time to get ready.

“Hey Eds, Whatcha want for breakfast?” Richie yelled to Eddie as he peered his head threw the door of his room, Eddie was in the shower.

“Richie? get out!!” Eddie squealed from the shower, “BUT Also eggos would be nice..”

“Coming right up,” Richie said.

Richie was honestly more surprised by the events of last night then what had happened a couple weeks back. But he didnt care, he didn’t want to even think about it, he just wanted to appreciate every second he had with eddie. Once Eddie was out of the shower he got dressed and hopped downstairs to join richie at the table.

“Finally done princess?” Richie said with a smirk.

“Oh shove off, just because you literally take a 2 mintue shower doesn't mean I took a long one.”

After breakfast they got their stuff together and headed out to Richies car, well his dad's car but Richie had practically just taken it as his own by now. The drive felt so long, they hadn't been in that car together since that night and you could cut the tension with a knife.

---

Pulling into the school parking lot they could see the rest of the losers club waiting for them in their usual spot. No one thought anything of seeing Eddie and Richie arriving at school together but when Bev saw them approaching her eyes lit up. Eddie noticing this stopped Richie before he got out of the car.

“Um uh- Rich..”

“Yeah?” He said looking puzzled at the shift in tone.

“Don’t freak out ok, but..” not knowing how to word what he was about to say next he just spit it out. “I TOLD BEVERLY. I-I told her everything.” he said, giving Richie a look so he wouldn't have to Elaborate.

Richie started laughing hysterically “oh eddie, I told bev too.”

Leaning back with a sigh of relief. “Oh wow, she's really got us wrapped around her fingers doesn't she.”

“We aren't the only ones” Richie whispered to Eddie pointing to Ben intently listening to whatever nonsense Beverly was spewing now.

They laughed and then sat in silence for a moment, looking at each other. While leaning forward ever so slightly, Richie again felt his gaze falling to Eddie's lips but this time Eddie was the one that swallowed hard in realization. Causing Richie to pull away only to feel Eddie's hand on his leg. He leaned into richie and whispered in his ear.

“Meet me at my locker between 4th and 5th period,”

Quickly jumping out of the car Eddie ran over to where the other losers were, not waiting for Richie to catch up.

“Hey guys!” Eddie yelled excitedly as he approached.

As they all exchange their different hellos. Beverly shot Eddie a look.

“Where's Richie?” she said with a smirk.

“Just being a slow poke that's all, but why don't you go check on him bev” Eddie said pointing “parked right over there”

Standing up and already walking in that direction she said “Maybe I will,” she shot a wink at eddie.

As Beverly made her way over to Richie she could see him sitting on the ground next to the side of his car smoking.

While slamming her hand down on the hood of the she said “Sup rich, fixin to get caught?”

“Huh uh i-” Looking up and seeing beverly he calmed down.”Awh fuck you bev,”

Sitting down next to him and pulling out her pack “So you and eddie. Is that like-”

“No. no it's not like- well i mean, it's…” he trailed off.

“Common rich you can talk to me, you know that.”

Richie started giving her a quick recap of yesterday, how Eddie had called him and came over. How they cuddled and slept on the couch together.

“And then before he left the car to go over to you guys he told me to meet him at his locker after 4th period..”

“Omg he did? What are you gonna do!”

“I don't know. Meet him after 4th period?”

“Why do you think he wants to meet up?” She asked with a smirk and raised an eyebrow.

“Get your head out of the gutter Beverly I swear, that's not why he wants to meet up..” looking at his feet then looking back at her. “Uh um that's not why he wants to meet up right?”

She shrugged “you won’t know until you go now will you?”

“yeah ..”

---

Richie had been staring at the clock all fourth period just waiting for it to ring. He was nervous, yes, but he was more curious than anything else.

*RINGGGGGGGGGG*

“Fuck” he said to himself.

He shot up out of his seat and walked quickly out of the class and down the hall. He could see Eddie already waiting at his locker. He shut it closed as he saw Richie approaching.

“Hey rich!”

“H-hey eds, whats up, did you need to talk or something..”

“I don’t know, I just thought we could hangout. I have a free period right now and you have lunch right?”

“Oh yeah of course.” richie said as he wondered why he felt slightly disappointed.

They walked through the halls together toward the cafeteria when richie blurted out.

“Wanna go off campus, now that we are seniors we can go off campus for lunch”

“Oh yeah, that's right we can. Sure, totally we can go to the diner across the street.”

As they made their way to the car there was this weird energy between them, it wasn't awkward but something was definitely off. The drive to the diner was yet another silent drive filled with loud radio music. Richie pulled up into a parking spot, it was still pretty early in the morning so there were only two other cars there.

“Rich..” Eddie said under his breath, they were both just sitting in the car not knowing what to do next.

“Yeah eds”

“Richie, I'm so sorry.” He looked up at richie. His eyes filled with tears.

“Oh Eddie, no, stop what's wrong” he said, grabbing Eddie's hand.

“I just- I thought I could make things normal again, and I thought if we just spent more time together I could put it past us and just move on richie.. But I can't. I can't stop thinking about you and that night and I don't know what to do. This is all my fault.”

“Eddie looks at me,” Richie said cupping Eddie's face in his hands.

“This is not just your fault eds,”

“Shut up you know it is, I came on too you remember.”

“Yeah I guess technically, but I gave you my jacket, right”

“Richie don’t be stupid, that was not the first time I wore your cloths”

“Yeah ok Eds but it was different. I mean like-”

“OK RICH BUT IT WASN'T THE FIRST TIME I THOUGHT ABOUT COMING ON TOO YOU”

Eddie's face was bright red. He wasn't crying anymore. He looked angry, but not at Richie, at himself. Richie was speechless, he could feel himself just staring at Eddie but he didn't see him.

“Richie say something, anything... please,”

The moments that past felt like hours but within seconds Richie had leaned into Eddie putting his lips on his. Pulling away ever so slightly so the noses are still touching and looking him deep in the eyes.

“Oh Eds you are so much braver than I will ever be.”

to be continued

—-

notes : AAA i honestly don’t know what I’m doing but I’m having fun so imma keep going. I Lowkey highkey don’t know how to write stuff like this but I hope you liked it! I feel like the point still comes across lol.

[michaelreaderreblog]

My Truemate pt18

AN; I know its been a very long time since I’ve posted anything. Well here it is, finally. I hope you all enjoy. All I did was edit and Im pretty happy how this part turned out. So hopefully tomorrow my wifi will be hooked up and posts will come regularly. Enjoy my loves

*******************************************************************************

To catch up you can go here >> My Truemate Series <<

Word Count: 2,491

When the both of you get to the diner and seated in a booth by the window is when the waitress comes to your table with a wide smile on her face.

“Hi, Im Dorothy and I will be your waitress for the afternoon” she says looking at you and extends her hand out to you.

You take her hand in a friendly gesture while nodding.

“Y/n this is Dorothy Baum, she has been a friend of Castiel since they were pups and still are” Michael introduces the both of you.

As she takes both of your order is when she still couldnt wipe the smile from her face.

She walks to the kitchen to put in the food order along to bring out your drinks.

“Um why is she so happy?” you ask looking away from her as she disappears into the kitchen.

“Beats me, usually she is so not like this. Actually I dont know how to describe her sometimes” he answers you and chuckles at the end of his comment.

“Ok then. Why have you brought me out for lunch? Isnt Anna going to be angry or something?” you ask not really wanting to know the answer.

“Well it seems as though she has met her true mate a couple of months ago and we mutually ended our relationship a few weeks ago” he answers never taking his eyes away from you.

You sit there stunned at the news and couldnt believe she actually let go of him but understood it all because true mates are involved.

“But if you didnt meet yours, than she met hers would she still be with you?” you ask from the distractions of your utter happiness but curious to know what he has to say.

“Well she mentioned if mine never came along then she would hold off her being truly happy with her true mate and still be with me. She didnt want me to be lonely if she still met hers because of the love she has for me” he answers in disbelief still.

You couldnt believe how much she would sacrifice for her true happiness if you never came along.

You were thankful you are around though and just thankful for Anna being incredibly selfless.

“Wow” is all that you could say.

When Dorothy comes back with drinks, she still has the smile on her face and winks over to Michael to give him a thumbs up.

The both of you talk about many things from books, music, tv shows, movies and basic interests.

“I know this is all sudden but um would you like to have dinner with me and my family at their house sometime this week?” he asks randomly.

“Uh yeah, I wouldnt call that sudden. It would be more like good timing” you simply answer back and having the relief of his family approving of the both of you.

“Good my parents would like to meet me and Castiel's mates so I guess he is going to ask Dean about that as well. Of course you can bring along Sam and Sarah considering they are mated already” Michael says with a smile on his face.

When Dorothy makes her back to your table with food in hands is when her attention is brought to the front door.

A Beta woman walks in and passes by your table.

“Oh good more Omega whores” the blonde woman says.

“Suzy that was uncalled for” Dorothy says

Michael was about to retort something back but you take your hand out for him to stay seated and he does.

“No, its ok. Since she is the only whore here. I can smell what? Two or three different Alpha's on you” you say while she turns around in her seat to look at you and tries to attack you but Dorothy has blocked her off.

“That is enough. OUT!!” Dorothy yells back to her while Suzy glares at her and walks to front door to exit the building.

“This wont be the last time you will see me. Next time you will be gone” she mutters walking out the door and as soon as she said that is when you got the feeling at the pit of your stomach was unsettling.

“Who the hell was that?” you ask looking between Michael and Dorothy.

“Suzy Roman, the sister of Dick Roman” Dorothy answers and as soon as she says Roman is when you went numb.

“Im sorry that had to happen, I know you handled yourself there but still shouldnt have to endure that” she says looking to you

“Does she have a thing for you why she had to be that way?” you ask bitterly to Michael and he raises his head to you.

“Yes but she is a Beta. I never wanted to date her or be near her all together. It was always her to force herself on me. Even while I was with Anna, she still did the same thing but never worked because she is a Roman. Those people are not respectful, they treat Omegas like toys and their belief system is traditional. Which they are traditionalists but that never went well with me” he answers you in the most sincere way without feeling angry talking about the Romans.

“I remember the one Christmas party Benny threw one year and Suzy came by as soon as she heard Michael was going to be there. Thats when she flirted with him in front of Anna. She tried taking him into one of the empty rooms but Anna had enough. Anna punched Suzy square in the face for her to leave him alone. I dont know how long she has tried to get with you. All she wanted was to get her hands on your business because of the shipments you get daily” Dorothy says and immediately the both of you look at her to what she said about him getting shipments every day.

“So what your saying is, if he had broken up with Anna in the first place. In the slightest way he was actually interested in her, she would get her hands on his business because of the shipments he gets everyday? Like why would she be interested in that?” you ask her to fully understand why she would be interested in his hardware business.

“Well its because the trucks that deliver the supplies he needs for his store. Especially since she joined her brothers business out of state, they only come back to make things not so obvious on what they are up to” she answers you quietly to make sure no other customer in the diner heard what she is elaborating on the Romans business deals.

“What are you incinuating?” Michael asks looking away from his food.

“After he made a business deal with a guy named Gordon Walker a few days ago. After my shift I went home to do research about this Walker guy because the way they were talking made me feel uneasy” she says as she cringes at the names and thoughts.

“Ok what turned up while researching?” Michael asks in curiosity.

“As it turns out this Walker guy is bad news, I mean he owns brotherls in Georgia and he owns one in Illinois” Dorothy answers Michael and you begin to feel really uneasy.

“Michael can you drive me home, Im beginning to feel sick” you ask him while feeling sick to your stomach

Michael’s anger is building the more he learns about Roman and the business he got himself into. He needed to do something to protect you and his brother. Thankfully he will have help. From his new brothers.

“Yes I can take you home. Dorothy print out those papers you found and give them to me. I want to show my father and if he is conspiring with the Romans than we have something” Michael says while trying to pay for the meal but Dorothy waves him off and nods in agreement for the information she has found while doing some research.

When Michael drives away from the diner is when he noticed how your scent has changed from mutual to fear, worry and anger. He reaches across the seat to place his hand on your knee to give a gentle squeeze.

“Hey I am not going to let them take you away from me or our family. We are going to protect you in any way that we can alright?” he asks looking away from the road for a brief moment to you and again back on the road again.

You sit there silent as you nod in agreement, you just wanted to go home to your brother you just hope that he was still home.

“Even if the whole thing involves Castiel I am going to protect him with everything I have” he adds while driving in the direction of your house.

He turned on the radio and Renegade by Styx comes on and soon your emotions are beginning to fade because of the music.

Michael has parked in the drive way and turned off the truck, he looks over to you and he can still sense you fear everything is soon about to change.

“Hey, look at me. I mean it when I say I am not going to let anyone take you away from me. We are going to fight tooth and nail to protect you in any way that we can” Michael says as he reaches over to place his hand under your chin to get a better look at him.

He gets out of the truck to walk around and open the door for you to head inside the house.

He looks around the yard to make sure nothing is out of the ordinary. He wanted to make sure no one is around to try and do anything to you if your brother wasnt home.

You unlock the door to open it

“Do you wanna come in?” you turn around to look at him as you ask before walking into the house.

“Yes I would like to come in” he simply answers with a smile upon his face and very surprised you asked him to stay.

“Dean, Im home” you yell for your older brother as the both of you walk into the house but there is no reply.

“I guess he went out with your brother for the afternoon. Do you mind if you stayed until he got back?” you ask without even thinking about asking the question but its out there in the open now and you werent going to take that back.

“Of course I can stay” he replies with a soft expression spread across his face and enters further into the house.

You lead him to the kitchen to make him more comfortable and thinking to make something to distract yourself from the information you and Michael found out.

He scents the air is changing and knew that you were feeling uncomfortable and he wished that none of this was happening but all he could do is try to settle your nerves.

He gets up from the chair to walk towards the radio thats on the counter. He turns it on to select the station that always works for him when he needs a distraction from everything else.

A song comes through the radio called Dont Give Up On Me by Solomon Burke.

He pulls you away from the cupboards and pulls you closer to him and he sways the both of you to the music as the lyrics come on.

“When I cant control something thats out of my element then I turn to music. To this station because some of the music just soothes everything away and I let the music carry me away” Michael says as he looks deep into your eyes, sways the both of you to the music playing in the back ground.

“Well thats one way to settle things. I would normally play the guitar. Until I stopped playing and finally picked it up again today. Well before you called anyways” You tell him with a slight smile an your face. He looks to you with complete adoration.

“I play the guitar as well and same thing. I just picked it up a few days ago and even wrote a song” he tells you while never looking away from you.

“I would love to hear the song, in fact would you play it for me now? I have the guitar in the living room” you ask in hopes he would play for you.

Neither of you notice that the song has ended as the both of you still dance to what ever song has come on the radio.

“Yeah I think I can play the song for you” he says with a smile on his face.

You pull away from him and lead him into the living room. You get the guitar from the corner of the living room hand it to him as he seats himself on the arm chair.

You sit close by on the couch, he tunes the guitar and when he knows its the way it should sound is when he started strumming.

You notice someone pulling into the garage and see its Dean and Castiel.

“Its called All My Only Dreams” Michael says before singing into the song

You fall in love with his singing as he moves into the chorus of the song.

Dean and Castiel walk further into the house and see its Michael who is singing.

Castiel has a bright smile on his face as he seats himself beside you, Dean sits on the other couch across from the both of you.

Michael is about to stop but notices his brother and his mate are loving the music from him and continues to play.

“My brother has never touched the guitar in so long. How did you manage to get him to play?” Cas asks as he leans in to whisper into your ear.

“I asked and he agreed” you simply answer with a fond smile.

When Michael finished is when Dean couldnt believe how talented Michael is for playing the guitar and having such an amazing singing voice.

“That was amazing” Dean says as he comes back into the living room and hands Michael a beer.

“Thanks, I was in the middle of playing when Anna came to my office and thats when we had the talk and mutually decided to end our relationship” he answers very honestly.

“I wrote the song for you y/n” he adds while he places the guitar away in the corner behind him.

Castiel has a bright smile on his face while Dean has the same.

You can feel that Dean is feeling rather content at what is in front of him and you can honestly tell that he is ready to let go of you.

[whataboutthepress-blog]

lit literature ~

A quote that I’ve taken interest in states that books are one of the best companions, better than people maybe. 

“Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counselors, and the most patient of teachers.”

-Charles William Eliot (former Harvard president)

Basically you can find the best book ever and it literally becomes apart of you! It is in fact a beautiful union. Imagine finding your soul in print on paper shredded from trees bond together tighter than your lips go when you read about your favorite character doing a bad deed. My list ain’t that deep; that’s not what this is. 

But what I am here for is the Summer Reading List 2 Kay Seumteen that i did promise. 

What is Summer Reading List 2 Kay Seumteen ?  

Summer Reading List 2 Kay Seumteen is a few books i read this summer of 2017 in my spare time. In between work and building other things in my life, i was able to knock out about 5 books, including a book of 4 short stories. This is nothing flashy. Probably books you've read already. But still...enjoy! There may be one that catches your eye. 

Circa June of this year, i was without a laptop and needed access to the internet. So like a regular citizen of a big city, i went to my local library and signed up for a library card. It started to be for computer purposes only, but im an avid reader (fan of recommended and passed on books) so it wasn’t very long before i made my way from the unreliable computer to the welcoming bookshelf. My love for literature runs deep! With that being said, I’m so happy to share my very first reading list, formally titled ‘Summer Reading List 2 Kay Seumteen’ . 

I began my summer reading “Faithful” by Alice Hoffman. Faithful was one of three books I checked out at my first visit (the first visit to the library that was strictly for finding book companions). During that book-blind-date experience, i also checked out a mystery fiction book that I can’t recall and some other less interesting book i misjudged due to my lack of judging books by their cover. 

Faithful not only made my summer list, but also made my ‘all time fave’ list. (Yall will never see that list because i doubt I’d ever write it.) This book spoke to me so clearly. I picked it up that day at Kendall Neighborhood library less of any expectations. It turned out to be one of the most relative pieces of literature in my life thus far. Faithful is about a young girl getting into a bad accident with her best friend in their final year of high school. The accident ends up leaving the young lady’s friend in a coma for a very long time. There are many other vital details, but i was able to relate mostly to the depression the main character endured. No, i havent never been in a life changing wreck, but i deal with issues daily that add to my depression. This book gave me hope. It lit a fire in my soul and i now feel i have an everlasting flame. Alice Hoffman spoke to me, personally, through this novel. I would recommend Faithful to anyone that is somebody. To anyone who ever wondered how deep depression goes. To anyone who’s ever felt alone in a dark world and to anyone who’s ever needed lifting. READ DIS. 

Book number two on SRL2KS is an absolute classic, and you may have already read it! The timeless “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings” by the late and great Ms Maya Angelou. This was a first time read for me and actually a venture from my newfound library relationship. A good friend of mine received this Non Fiction paperback book from his niece, and I began reading it before he could even pick it up. Once i began to read and learned Angelou spent many years of her childhood being raised in Stamps, Arkansas, there was no quittin’ this book. 

I purposely chose this version of the cover because this is the exact one that i had in my possession. This is the story of young Angelou’s childhood alongside her brother. Raised by their grandmother (on the daddy side, you know how that go) and their uncle, Maya and her brother go through much in this detailed story of stories. Focusing on the trials and tribulations of young Maya, i would recommend this book for my young ladies. This is a must read for women all over the world honestly. Reading the hurtful and happy can grant one a new view on life and a few decent quotes to live by too.

Next on the great SRL2KS, i explored more African American authors! I found, what i would consider, a short story by a young adult/youth literature writer named Ms Jacqueline Woodson. The novel titled “Another Brooklyn” is a specially written story about a young, black Muslim girls childhood. This is not a religious story nor is it a kids book. It speaks on a young girl growing up around other girls and making a close knit bond. The girls grow together and the story continues to follow the young black girl and her little brother after they begin to reside with their father in Brooklyn, New York.

Woodson speaks and describes the bond of the girls so well to me, in a way i dream of expressing my thoughts. I took note of how she talked about them loving and lifting each other just to remember to share this novel with my daughter one day. I wont ruin the end, but everything wasn’t peaches and cream. With that, I still  recommend this novel to young women everywhere (not only women of color). It’s short, so it won’t take up much of your time, but it’s still nice to knock out a book by an AA author at any given time for me. 

Completely and fully inspired by “I Know Why the Caged Bird Sing”, my next book is another Maya Angelou non fiction. “Mom and Me and Mom” is Maya expanding on her relationship with her mother, an exceptional woman mentioned in my first read by Maya many times. I too had a close relationship with my mother, so it was easy for me to pick this book up with an open heart. "Mom and Me and Mom” expands on a series of short, less detailed stories mentioned in IKWCBS. I was able to get to know Maya’s mother more and get an in depth point of view of their relationship. I can never think about this book and not think of my own mom lol.

This isn’t a must read IMO if you’ve read IKWCBS, but i still recommend this one for the lovers, like myself. If you love that warmer than fresh baked cookies feel or you absolutely admire your mom (again, meee), you’d enjoy a heartwarming story about an adventurous young woman and her ambitious mother. I loved this book!

In the summer of Seumteen, i aspired to learn. I took an interest into sign language which led to me looking into sign lit (sign language books lol) ! In the mist of it all, i did of course continue my reading *Stevie J nod*

My last and final book on my marvelous Summer Reading List 2 Kay Seumteen is by one of my all time favorite authors, Stephen King. My favorite book in the whole world was written by King under a different name. (I completely refuse to elaborate on my favorite book for future blog reasons) “Full Dark, No Stars” is just another opportunity for me to fall in love with King’s writing more. After reading this book of four short stories, I vowed to take advantage of all the Stephen King books at Ring Library, the local joint. Ring is a small facility, so it will take me no time to read the 8-10 Stephen King books they shelter. Also, things change when it comes to what the library has on shelf. 

In “Full Dark, No Stars”, King starts with a story about a man and his son in the 1920s having to make a tough decision that ends up creating a string of events you’d least expect. This story was one of my favorite of the four because it was rated Stephen King, or gruesome and skin crawling, and also humors under all the unfortunate events. The second story is a tale of a woman who is attacked while she is stranded roadside after not following her gut. In the drawn out story, the young lady seeks revenge, but the inside sleeve of this book will never prepare you for how deep the revenge goes. The third is pretty short and the biggest reach! A tale of a man who has been dealt a somewhat sad deal of cards. The father and husband is given the opportunity of a life time: to relieve his life of misery. Of course there is a condition or to this...other than the obvious cash money, the character’s genie also requests that this man allows his burdens to be placed on the one person he hates the most. The story pretty much left me speechless, in a questionable way. Lastly was my favorite of the four. An interesting story of a woman discovering the past and somewhat current life of her husband. The story has a twist that i didnt exect or regret. It really makes you wonder if you really know people too! I confidently recommend this book to readers with an imagination thats willing to get twisted. Stephen King never fails at making me grin after i turn the last page of his novels. This read was so good, i’m inspired to do a King binge and best believe a blog will follow :)

In review, take a peek at

Faithful by Alice Hoffman I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou Another Brooklyn by Jacqueline Woodson Mom and Me and Mom by Maya Angelou Full Dark, No Stars by Stephen King

Enjoy, my fellow readers. And look out.

[fluffi]

so should i reply in tiny font or just regular font?

hybe should do better in spreading out the comebacks of the groups under them :/ they're already at a huge advantage, might as well use it strategically. AHA streaming mvs is so convenient for a multi. the filler vids i could use in between could be mvs from the other groups that i stan. also you know what, i still haven't watched a single final performance bc im waiting for a friend to watch with me :D

i have a chinese movie recommendation in case you want something to cry over. i still love its ost and it's been months since i watched it. i'm not sure if you watched it already but more than blue. i've never cried over a movie as much as i cried for that one. the angst *chef's kiss*. i'd do anything to wipe my memory of it and watch it again for the first time.

also sungchan is mc-ing in inkigayo every sunday! and honestly, what the hell is nct hollywood :D but a part of me thinks it's just going to be a bunch of asians living in america like johnny that'll be a part of it. just a hunch tho. imagine having all 4 units coming back in a year with like 1 unit per quarter of the year. i'm not sure if sm even has the money to do this, especially when they filed bankruptcy recently.

and i've seen a lot of twitter memes saying taro's ghosted stans T_T alexa play ghosting by txt T_T sm come on give him smth to do, you're wasting talent.

the mall didn't burn down entirely (like from the outside it looked fine). the ventilation system caught fire so it was more internal—ceilings and all that. covered things with soot(?) and ashes so the entire mall was closed for nearly 2 years. and hey, i've experienced a school fire too back when i was younger. i, too, thought it was nothing but a fire drill until i saw the charred remains of the buildings behind our school : D thankfully, no one died.

the new nct track is for a samsung commercial AHAHA it's funny because nearly everyone uses apple TT_TT and the mv screams neo culture tech tho (well as it should lmao). yes, i was talking about that part in hot sauce but yes, it grew on me too.

ateez really know how to do a performance. they put the standard so high for me when it came to performing. their facial expressions and overall stage presence just impresses me. it's been a while since i've seen idols draw me to them by those standards.

ah, the long stan list! good luck in getting through it and i hope you do have fun as you go :] (also you can check out aurora by ateez and whiplash by tbz. the songs popped up in my head as i was typing this reply, you might like them)

ohhhh, what was the pd48 scandal? i don't watch survival shows so i don't know any of the stuff going on. would you care to elaborate? about their disbandment :(( i hope you're okay now tho! are the other girls still debuting in new groups? anyone eyeing an acting career instead of being an idol?

YES, A PATTERN IN THE BIASES (if you count an analysis of two ppl as a pattern, that is.) because it's the same pattern i have for my biaswreckers :D jake & seungmin, not only do they have the same animal to represent them, they have the same 'golden retriever' type of personality that just makes you go all soft. ygwim ;n; i wish i could elaborate but both boys just devastate me in the same level and my friends pointed out that they were quite similar in some aspects.

jaemin used to send really long bbl messages :< like if there was anything he loved most it was nctzens and it was obv in his messages. speaking of dream, album repackage news today! idk what to feel bc my hot sauce albums haven't even arrived yet :D + i'm dead br0ke.

how do you even manage to read 30k TT__TT i cant handle long fics bc of my attention span :D also, yes, i found the user now, i'll check if i'll like their works soon. <33

YES YOU SHOULDVE BEEN THERE T_T what a day that was. i think seungmin is still sweet and active in bbl. not a single cent goes to waste with him. also i think i'll post the drabble some time this month.

and oml seungmin vs jake :o let's see how that goes O.O XDD

clickity-clackity AHAH do you have a mechanical keyboard? :c i wanted one too but i haven't got around to saving up for one. but yes indeed, typing asmr v relaxing \m/

sunny hyuck day, fullsun sunday, fullsunday T_T feels were very strong that day. i kept seeing edits on my twt tl and i would just s o b : D i've only stanned nct for a year but i've seen him grow so much i just wanted to crie i love him sm :') yk my mom didn't cook spaghetti for my birthday, but she cooked for hyuck's? : D

and i checked ur recs blog and indeed, full of nct T_T

also have i mentioned that your desktop thing amuses me so much HAHAH i got confused for a sec if i had twt opened or tumblr. plus, i've been wanting to mention that i noticed that our mobile themes are opposites. black and red, white and blue. it's cute XDD <3

help, people have been telling me that our asks are long but i highkey love it. i added a ‘keep reading’ for the mobile users though, sorry in advance hh.

honestly, both works. tiny font saves space but regular font does more justice for my poor eyes haha. its your call!

hybe comebacks :( yeah enhypen got lucky because they came back right before cb season so they got three wins (yay)! on the bright side, txt just got their first win and bts has six wins, so it all works out i guess. omg yes, the streaming thing is perfect. i stan like 20 groups so i have a never-ending cycle of filler mvs and its always so helpful. ooh for the final performances - you wont regret watching any of them! literally wild, kingdom's budget and talent are wild.

ooh, I don't watch any cdramas lmao. i want to but i can barely finish kdramas. if its a movie ill watch it! ive never heard of more than blue but ill check it out <3 where can i watch it?

yes yes i have just realized that sungchan is yujin's co-mc! i watched their special stage (which is literally adorable) and was today years old when i realized that the dude is sungchan pls. nct hollywood was so unexpected and i still have mixed feelings about it now. LMAO JUST ASIANS LIVING IN AMERICA...help. that would be interesting (?) but the concept reminds me of those horrendous awesomeness tv shows. lets hope sm pulls this off well and proves me wrong. lmao all 4 units coming back would probably happen, but i hope none of them get overworked :( i constantly feel like mork lee has four clones :'( also...sm filed bankcruptcy??? dang, what happened?

ugh omg yeah shotaros talent is seriously being wasted in the basement right now. as for fires, scary T-T i wasnt that fazed by them until the australia wildfires happened, and i learned about the consequences of fire and got really scared. its good that the entire mall didnt burn down though! although its weird that no one is opening it :( schools really need to tell us the difference between drills though, it might be dangerous for those rebellious kids.

yeah i just realized that the nct track is an endorsement which partly explains why i cant listen to it. the mv's visuals are stunning!! the set and people are so gorgeous aa i cant

oh yeah im not an atiny but i have acknowledged since 2020 that they have one of the best, if not the best stage presence and expressions on stage for 4th gen. i think their only worthy competitor would be stray kids actually. theyre truly one of a kind and all of them are cute especially that yeosang guy. i will definitely check out your song recommendations though!

oof the pd48 scandal is extremely complicated. to condense it in a few statements: all of the girls' rankings have been rigged since the very beginning and it was rumored that they already had their end group before the show even started. it was like this for pf48 and pdx101 (group x1) which was why x1 disbanded within a month of debuting, and izone were on hiatus for like 4 months. im not the best at explaining stuff like this haha, but i think you get it. you can check out yt or search up 'pd48 scandal', a ton of articles and videos. as for new groups, nothing has been made clear yet. theyve only made instagram handles for now and appeared on variety shows haha. as for acting career, hyewon was supposed to do acting but was forced to join pd48 so maybe she'll continue acting afterwards? nothing is confirmed yet!

lmao two similarities, its okay it counts. ah, true, i can see their similarities now that youve mentioned it, as well as how jeno is kind of like that. however, i am currently attached to jaemin so we'll see what happens from there hehe. i swerve easily.

jaemin on bubble grr, that would be a whole experience. from the bare minimum of vidoes ive seen for him wbk jaemin is so whipped for czennies. ah yes repackage! i saw the post on instagram and went to the comments to see everything screaming ‘iM bROke!’ and it was lowkey hilarious lmao. kpop is really trying to suck our money T-T.

ope the longest fic ive read is like...40k words i think? and it was by jeonginks. ill read anything eiko produces lmao, theres always so much substance in her work. ooh, tell me what you think of luvdsc’s stuff, i just finished binging their entire masterlist lmao.

seungmin vs jake yeah, i havent been catching up on skz enha content because im still obsessing over the dreamies but when that saga is over then im going to focus on my ults lmao (which might include dream soon, hehe).

yes yes i have a mechanical bluetooth keyboard that i use to connect to my computer! it literally sounds amazing lmao, its only 10am here but i feel like im going to doze off from the clickity clackitys already. i cant wait for you to get one! tell me when you do, we can match hehe.

hyuck is an aodrable brat please. hes like the best comedian of nct at this point, so hilarious and filled with variety i love him. he rose up my bias list pretty fast too. LMAO YOUR MOM IS SO COOL I LOVE HER ALREADY. if only my mom would cook for my ults’ borndays.

yes my rec blog is a mess right now, ill organize it soon haha.

omg thank you and yes my website theme is one-of-a-kind. even i get confused when i open it or edit it, and i constantly get comments about it. also i just realized our opposing theme colors and i love it! its adorable.

[nobodys-cat]

I'm Bi

This elaboration is primarily for my own sake. You may ignore.

Eighth grade, a friend of mine (no longer friends) cane out to me as bisexual. That was the first real experience I'd had with anyone in my life not being straight. As a bit of time passed, I saw her confused and thinking about different labels. Bi, lesbian, demi. Introducing me to new labels, though she didn't realize she was doing that too. Around the same time, I got more into the LGBT+ community online. Just like, reading about it on Instagram and such. Different struggles and terms and people loving themselves in their identity.

At some point, I looked at my Instagram feel, and had the thought "I don't think even an invested straight ally would have this much LGBT stuff on their feed." I wrestled with that for a while, as I felt that I was an ally, and that I only cared about that stuff for other peoples' sake. To this day, I find that mostly true, still. I can brush homophobia off when it's towards me, but it kills me to see it towards someone else.

But, in ninth grade, I also found myself to be interested in a female teacher. And I struggled with that, as I couldn't identify why it was that I liked her. Especially seeing as it was a teacher. I tried throughout that time to see if I was interested in any other females like that. Pretty much only one, and once again, it was an adult.

Also in ninth (and tenth) grade, I became exposed to more LGBT people and their labels. Pan, ace, bi. With each label, I found myself looking too see if that matched me. However, I felt that if I decided to go with one of those, I'd be sort of copying them. In my mind, pan matched the best, as I thought that I felt the same about pretty much any gender. But I realized that it also might've been asexuality. Aro crossed my mind, but I wanted a romantic relationship so badly that I barely even touched it.

In tenth grade, I found myself very interested in a girl two years older than me for months. The issue was, i still couldn't identify what it was that I felt. Did I really want to be her friend? To impress her as my mentor (she was in the second level of my two-level class, I was in the first)? Was I interested in her romantically? I don't think what I feel is sexual, is it? Was I just craving attention? (Note: throughout tenth grade, I was also going through a bad mental state and loneliness). When my best friend finally got out of me that I had a crush on this girl, I asked if that's what it really was, if I really had a crush. She said that because it had lasted months, that yeah, it probably was. But, along with that, I panicked when she found out, and we never really spoke more about it.

That summer, after having done yet more research into different sexualities, I found one that seemed to fit. I was reading Ash Hardell's book: The ABC's of LGBT+. I read a term called quoiromantic (quoisexual) which was essentially the inability to differentiate between romantic/platonic/sexual attraction. I read that, and I shook and cried when I discovered that I wasn't alone in that.

I also heard about a term (which I forget atm) that pretty much meant that one experienced platonic attraction and relationships, but could also be okay with being in a romantic relationship with those people. That one also could've fit me for a while, as I didn't really know the difference between dating and friendship.

Fast-forward to 11th grade. I identified as quoisexual at this point. But I met this girl who changed that, and for the first time I experienced a genuine romantic and sexual attraction. I've had about three actual crushes in my life. A boy in middle school, a girl in tenth grade, and this girl. This is the only one I consider to be actual determined romantic attraction. And, this is the one I'm dating now. Experiencing this led to further questioning, which I was really getting sick of after the past seceral years. The only reason I wasn't out was because I didnt have a label to come out as.

I really thought I was gay for a while. Which, when I came out to some parts of my family, that's what I came out as. However, about a week after coming out to those people (a month or so ago), something hit me. It wasn't neccessarily a lack of attraction (though, I do still believe I experience limited amounts of sexual attraction), but it was guilt and shame. I've realized recently that I have a lot of shame surrounding sex and attraction that I didn't ever realize I had until it came up in conversations. Plus, in my head, I had myself subconciously convinced that if I wasn't 100% gay, it wouldn't be good enough for my girlfriend. I was so scared of that (cue me holding back tears now). And, I felt guilty for allowing myself to look at anyone else like that. I didn't even w a n t to (still don't) But, for just a minute or so, I let that all down. I thought about it. And I decided that I could be attracted to guys. But primarily women. So, I settled on bisexual. Finally.

And I told my girlfriend, and she's proud of me. I had nothing to worry about there. I didn't really tell anyone else in my life because it seemed unimportant to mention. I like to not have people making a big deal over me for things like this. But I decided that this story was worth writing, and putting out there, and getting off my chest, as it's been building up for so very long. This was for my sake, but if you're still reading, thank you for taking the time to look at it ♡