#like holy goddamn shit you nailed it

[team-frightfur]

Ye-hey quick question tumblr! Quick Q! Just a short one! Why did I only get notified of this absolute masterpiece today??? 2 days after it was posted??? The fact that I didn't get to thank the post for this incredible gift eats away at me, Tumbles.

(If this post was privated or drafted or something I take this back.)

Anyway, that aside, everyone say the magical chant!: Dramaturgy is a Normal fic where absolutely nothing bad happens to anyone! Come closer.

(Also you don't need to tag anything and I'm curio about your headcanons! Don't restrain yourself on anyone else's account! Draw headcanons in every pic its always moral!)

Tags continued.

(He has and he isnt leaving anytime soon).

Also, I'm so glad that even though I broke up the 'They weren't monster cards' in text you still got the sense of their repetition. The boy is spiralling and they keep repeating and they won't go away. + The lil vomm drops make me weirdly delighted like yes! I'm glad the sickening disgust and horror vomm stuck with you! I'm sure Yuya reacting to Yuto's 'death' was very fun for you!

But for real, I'm so honoured and so grateful to have seen this pic and I wish I could send you 1 million hugs and thanks. This is gonna make my existence.

Ok last comment it just really tickles me that all the rendered art crimes in DMTG have been neutral or happy moments (like Yuya smiling, yoot in the afterlife park, or Yuzu being ready to fight) but both pieces of fic fanart I've seen come from the same Yuto breakdown chapter. There are two types of dramaturgy readers.

So there's a fic, right,

Fan art for Dramaturgy: Standard by @team-frightfur of Chapter 33

[wingsy-keeper-of-songs]

Me: *watching Most Dangerous Game: New York Flavored* This one is leagues better than Littlest Cancer Patient Liam Hemsworth.

Also me: Why is Victor's sister so goddamn stupid and why does that make me so mad??

[empresskylo]

things simon ‘ghost’ riley would say in bed

⊹ simon 'ghost' riley x afab!reader

[ warnings ] NSFW. MDNI.

cod masterlist

♡ that’s my good fuckin’ girl.

♡ you look s’pretty on your knees.

♡ shh, baby, i know you can take it.

♡ want me to fill you up, yeah?

♡ you’re so fuckin’ tight, princess.

♡ ah, ah, just lay back. i got you.

♡ this what you wanted? wanted my cock buried—fuck—deep inside you?

♡ hey, open your fuckin' eyes. look. at. me.

♡ fuck, baby, grab the headboard. shit—that's right, princess. hold on.

♡ i’m gonna fuck that sweet cunt of yours 'till you're beggin' me t'stop.

♡ been thinkin’ bout this all day, pet. fuckk—you are a goddamn dream.

♡ gonna fill you up good n’ proper.

♡ legs on my shoulders, pet.

♡ i want you to come. right now. i’m not gonna tell you again.

♡ on your fuckin’ knees, princess.

♡ i don't care if your legs are shaking. i'm not done.

♡ you belong to me. say it. tell me you're mine.

♡ is my pretty girl struggling to take my cock? hm? you can take it, baby.

♡ gonna milk me for every fuckin' drop, my greedy fuckin’ girl.

♡ fuckkk, these tits.

♡ you're gonna be the goddamn death o’me.

♡ open your mouth good n’ wide.

♡ is my sweet girl gonna come? gonna come on my cock, yeah?

♡ com’on baby, come on my tongue. i wanna taste ya.

♡ you’re gonna have t’beg for it.

♡ mmm, you can do better than that.

♡ want my fingers inside you? gotta use your words, princess.

♡ already fuckin’ soaked, pet. all f’me?

♡ buck your hips up into me. oh fuck—yeah, jus' like that.

♡ god, you taste so fuckin’ good, baby.

♡ you look so good taking my cock like this.

♡ you can take me deeper than that. i know you can.

♡ this what you wanted, hm? me bendin’ you over and havin’ my way with you?

♡ oh, my greedy girl. cant wait any longer, hm? gonna cry if i don't give it to ya?

♡ that’s right, princess. keep sucking on my—oh fuck—cock. keep goin’. fuck, you feel s’good.

♡ gonna spread those pretty thighs for me?

♡ fuck yeah, dig your nails into my back. harder. fuckkkin' hell.

♡ promise to be quiet?

♡ you like being fucked like this? like a fuckin' whore? hm? but only for me.

♡ swallow. now.

♡ com’ere, baby. come sit on my lap. wanna rub yourself against me?

♡ been waitin’ all day to bury my cock inside you.

♡ play with your clit f’me, princess. i wanna watch you come around your fingers.

♡ i want you t'look at me while i'm deep inside you. i want t'watch your eyes water while i fuck you senseless, yeah?

♡ you’re squeezin’ me so goddamn tight.

♡ this cunt is all fuckin' mine. you hear me, pet? all. mine.

♡ you look so pretty with tears all down your cheeks. that good, hm?

♡ fuckk, princess. bite harder. i can take it.

♡ ah, don't you dare hide from me, pet. open those fuckin' legs. com'on... that's a good girl.

♡ this pussy was fuckin' made f'me. fuckin' hell. you are so goddamn tight.

♡ com'on, princess. i wanna hear ya. don't go shy on me now.

♡ i want you t'come with me. hey, look at me. that's right, love. now—oh shit—come with me. fuckkk—come now.

♡ these sounds all for me, yeah? holy shittt—that's right. you're takin' my cock so well—jesus christ.

[jarofstyles]

❛ come in me. i need you to fill me up. ❜

JEJE

This is late 😭 I wrote this a few days ago and forgot to post it… but it’s from the dialogue prompts I reblogged a bit ago and I felt like writing something!! 😃 and it’s dirty of course

This is from Illicit universe if you want to imagine that, or could be a standalone ❤️ and it’s pure filth

Check out our Patreon

Warnings- unprotected sex, creampie, breeding, the usual filth

——

Y/N mewled as she felt his cock filling her up. thorough, deep, hot, her face felt hot as he pressed down on her tummy. “Holy fuck.” The whimper resonated through their bedroom, along with the wet slap of skin and the soft sound of her little gasps and his grunts.

Harry's eyes rolled back as he felt her clenching around his cock, the sound of her mewling and whimpering driving him wild. It always did. He gripped firmly, fucking into her with his deep thrusts. Feeling every inch of her was what he needed more than anything. "Fuck, baby… fuck, I needed you." Harry's eyes rolled back, his head thrown back in ecstasy as he felt his cock filling her tight, wet pussy over and over again. It had been too long without it. He liked his job, but being away from her for business trips was becoming increasingly hard. Keeping his hand pressed firm on her stomach, his eyes refocused as her tits bounced with each thrust.

His length felt thick inside of her, stretching her cunt to its limits. It had been weeks since he’d been inside of her and it was showing with how she felt when he pushed inside. With each thrust, he filled her up completely, making her feel full to the brim with his hot, throbbing prick. The goal was always to make her feel good, full, satiated.

“Did you miss it?” Y/N panted, peering up at him with a loaded gaze. “Did you miss my cunt while you were away, H?”

Harry groaned at the dirty talk, his cock twitching inside of her. “Shit, angel... So much. You’ve got no fuckin’ idea. I couldn't stop thinking about it." He shifted his hips, changing the angle and hitting a particularly sensitive spot that made her gasp and tighten around him even more.

“What did you think about?” she needed to know. their phone sex hadn’t been as frequent as she wanted, but he was making it up to her now. Giving her exactly what he knew she’d need.

Harry's breath hitched as he thought back to their phone calls. They were good, anything was with his love, but nothing could compare to the real thing. Flesh against flesh, the taste, the sounds… "I thought about fucking you in the shower, bending you over the sink and pounding you out until the water turned cold." He thrust harder, the headboard jostling a bit as he looked down at the pretty cunt he had missed so desperately. “Had the perfect bathroom and no pretty little slut t’fuck full. S’a goddamn shame…”

“Shit.” Y/N whined, wrapping her legs tighter around his waist. “I know you hate wasting cum, baby. M’sorry I wasn’t there for you to have when you got worked up. Next time you’ll just have t’take me with you.”

Harry grunted, making a note of that. No trips for that long without her again. He would have to ensure she was there next time. Pay for her his damn self if they cared about him taking a plus one. Clingy? Maybe. But she was his god damn soul mate and he needed her. "I fucking hate it when you're not there, Y/N. I end up jerking off in the shower, imagining it's your tight little cunt I'm fucking." His lips ghosted hers. “It all belongs inside of you.”

Y/N's back arched off the bed, her nails digging into Harry's back as he thrust into her harder and spoke dirty words to her. Hazy eyes glazed over with pleasure at his words. Her legs pulled him closer, trying to get deeper, deeper, deeper.

“Put it in me then.” She coaxed. “I missed it just as much. Hate feeling empty.” Her body loved every single bit of him, getting off on the mere grazes of his fingers but the desperation he showed had her dripping around him. Call her selfish but she wanted everything. “Cum in me. Need you t’fill me up. Give me what you’ve been holding back.” She mewled. “I want it.”

Harry's control snapped at her words, his body reacting to the request before his brain could connect. It wasn’t his normal, but the combination of how good she felt, how long it had been and her words had shot the target. He slammed into her one last time before stilling deep inside her. His hips jerked a few times as he unloaded his heavy balls deep into her spasming cunt. "Fuck, fuck, fuck! M’sorry baby, I couldn’t hold it.” He slurred, body shaking slightly, mouth slack. Her orgasm usually came first, but she had triggered it without giving him warning. “I jus’ fucking missed you so much…”

Harry's cum shot deep into her, filling her cunt to the brim with hot, thick ropes of his essence. It overflowed slightly from around their joined bodies, running down her ass and onto the bed. Filthy, messy, completely them. His cock twitched and throbbed inside of his girl, each pulse sending another spurt of cum deep into her, filling the primal need. He panted, kissing her between inhales as his cum continued to ooze out of her. “M’sorry baby. I’ll take care of you in a second.”

Arms wrapped around Harry, holding him close as she pulled his face against her neck. Soft strokes to his hair followed whispered soothing words as he caught his breath. In all honesty? She found it incredibly hot that he had lost control like that, pouring his heart and cum into her without hesitation. It was a compliment. “It’s okay, baby.” Comforting him was instinct. “I know you’ll take care of me. wanted your cum so bad anyway…” She kissed the side of his head, letting him catch his breath. “Think you have some more for me?”

Greedy, greedy. Always needy. It’s something he utterly loved about her.

Harry groaned against her neck before slowly pulling from her heated channel. White cum dribbled down her ass as he grinned sheepishly at her question. “Maybe.” He gave her a sly little smile, licking his lips as she pulled his mouth down for a kiss. “Let me clean you up with my tongue n’food and give you your own orgasm first. Need you t’be taken care of.”

[gh0stsp1d3r]

Day 5- mask kink with adrian chase ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

kinktober masterlist

Adrian’s hands roamed your body, his mouth clashing with yours. You let out a moan when he bit your lip, causing him to let out a chuckle against your mouth.

He began to take off the rest of his suit, peeling it off, while you took off your own clothes.

You had been harboring this secret ever since you found out he was vigilante, and you hated to admit it, but seeing him in the mask, taking out bad guys was the hottest thing you think you’ve ever seen in your life. You glanced over at the mask on the nightstand before turning your attention back to him.

He let out an audible groan at the sight of your naked body, and it never failed to have him hard in seconds.

“Goddamn. Swear, one day babe, you’re gonna kill me.”

You giggled at him, moving to kiss his lips again. His hands went to your cheeks, and he hovered on top of you, you leaning against the pillow.

He began to take off his boxers when you said his name, causing him to look at you with a quirked eyebrow.

“Yeah?”

“I uhm… I had this idea.”

“Okay. Like what kind of idea?”

“A sexy one.”

He looked even more intrigued now, waiting for this idea.

“You should… keep it on.”

“Huh?” He asked, swallowing the lump in his throat, if you were thinking what he was thinking you meant, he’d jump up and down. “Keep what on?”

“The mask.”

His lips quirked up at that, eyes widening behind his glasses. “Holy shit. I think that made me even harder than I was.”

You laughed at him again, watching him scramble off the bed and go towards the dresser, putting it over his head and looking at you.

“So?”

“You look hot.”

He smiled underneath his mask, making his way back onto the bed. You were glad that you could at least see his eyes behind his visor, giving you some sort of vision.

“Babe, I have to say, this is the hottest idea you’ve ever had.” He told you, taking off his boxers, you smiling up at him while his cock was lined up at your entrance.

“I’m-“ you paused to gasp, gripping his shoulders while he slowly pushed into your warm walls. “Glad you liked it”. You breathed out.

“Of course I do. We might actually have to do this more.” He murmured, letting out a low groan when he finally bottomed out, feeling your nails leave crescent shaped marks in his back, his helmet hitting your neck.

“I was scared you wouldn’t like it.” You admitted to him, him moving away so that he could look down at you again.

He snickered at that. “Babe, have you even met me? I’m up for anything at this point. Especially this.”

“Good. Because you look so goddamn good in your mask.” You pressed a kiss to where his nose would be, making him let out a breathy laugh.

[wxnheart]

𝐏𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐏𝐚𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐳𝐚, 𝐂𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐤𝐰𝐢𝐜𝐡 (𝐂𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦 𝐅𝐢𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 E𝐝𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧)

part one

Say my name I promise I'll love you if you do it So do it for me

Chaos doesn't always have to be bad, you know.

Take for instance the bed. After some good sex. The bed that'll be a fucking mess.

Pillows everywhere (you swear you have more pillows than you do blankets; thank the Pillow Princess for that), covers thrown haphazardly, and you'll be there, sweaty and sated, resting in a pile of muscled arms, legs, and chest.

You usually don't know who the hell you're laying on you're so fucked out but damn their chest feels good.

Heh. You thought your libido was high but König and Simon got you beat there, too. By miles. Holy fucking shit. You and König also joke that Simon's the slut of the three of you. The bastard doesn't deny it, either.

As much as Simon and König love you, best believe there's always a competition between the two men when it comes to you sexually.

You'll also find out that the winner of their sparring matches is also the one who gets to fuck you first.

Those hands of König's aren't just good with a knife. He can make you come with those fingers alone.

He's also the one who loves to go down on you (this isn't to say that Simon doesn't). Will feast on you forever if you let him. Will also encourage (read: command) you to fuck his mouth or ride his face.

Dirty talk — Simon is a fucking pro. While König's showing you what his mouth does, Ghost is practically growling in your ear and telling you everything they'll do to you. Everything.

They can and will subject you to some orgasm denial if you wanna fuck around and find out, too.

And oh baby, when you get down on your knees and return the favor... it takes everything in them not to bust right then and there.

König goes crazy when you suck the head of his dick. Simon has this one vein on the underside of his. That's his weak spot. Have fun.

König loves it when you run your nails down his back while he's fucking you. Loves to see those marks in the mirror.

You also found that one spot on Simon's shoulder that if you bite down on it, the fucker goes crazy.

He loves covering you in hickeys, too.

König is the gentle but firm kisser. Simon is the passionate, tongue-fuck, bite-your-lip-and-leave-a-mark kisser. So bite his lower lip and leave a mark, goddamnit.

One time they were away and you were so fucking horny, you called them up. They heard you, heard your pleas as you touched yourself, as you told them you missed their hands, their mouths, and their dicks. You told them that you needed them to come home and fill you up. You moaned so wantonly and practically screamed when you came. They were dead silent the entire time.

König was so damn flustered and hard and frozen like a goddamn statue. Ghost was fucking seething. He was so fucking pissed. He was so fucking aroused. Why the fuck would you do that, knowing he wants nothing more than to be home, fucking you into the mattress, fucking your face, or god knows what else. Refused to rub one out and most definitely saved that for when he got home.

Simon and König also got you back once by calling you and making you masturbate for them. And god, you can never forget the way they sounded, authoritative, their accents heavy and thick with desire as they fucking ordered you to touch yourself and moan for them. Yeah, that's it. Moan for them, baby. Cum for them...

Oh, yeah, back to competition. One time König was away and Simon was home and you spent the better part of the day teasing him. He told you in so many words to fuck around and find out. You found out alright. Goddamn, did you find out.

He made you ride him. He made you ride him and like fuck were you stopping anytime soon. König called, Simon made you answer the phone (on speaker no less) and made you say his name ("Say it, love. Tell him who's making you fucking scream."). Oh shit. Silence on the other end. Again. Oh fuck, you knew it was on when König got home.

...And when you're busy catching your breath, sweaty and sated, wrapped in muscled arms, after some good ass sex—"Ready for another round?" What? You look up and two pairs of eyes stare back, clouded with feral want, and oh fuck—

[hyukalyptus]

cw. bsf!yeonjun, kissing, unprotected sex, creampie, biting, nail scratching, sweat.

thinking about play fighting with bsf!yeonjun until he pins his hand on your hip and you just can't take it any more, eye searching each other for what the other is thinking until he crashes his lips on yours.

flipping you over so ur straddling him, lifting your shirt over ur head. hungry hands reaching for your tits before he sucks on ur nipple while you desperately tug at the hem of his shirt.

struggling to get ur shorts off as fast as possible, not even caring enough for a condom bc i need you inside me, please. his big hands holding ur pelvis in place while he fucks you like he's been desperate to for years.

it's all a blur really, ur not sure how you ended up like this, getting fucked so goddamn well by ur best friend, so well you wonder why you bothered fucking anyone else.

nails scratching down his back while he bites ur tits, relieving years of pent-up sexual frustration all at once. beads of sweat rolling down his forehead he's fucking u that fast. skin shiny and sticky with sweat.

and you just can't wait any longer. you need to come, to feel him come inside you too. nothing but fuck, ohmygod, please, don't stop, holy shit, yes, yeonjun... spilling from your mouth as he gives you one of the best orgasms you've ever had. feeling him fill you up not long afterward.

and when ur laying side by side, catching ur breath and you ask what the fuck was that? but don't act like you haven't wanted to fuck since we met.

[lovebugism]

i feel like stevie definitely has a breeding kink it’s just like a gut feeling i have you know

✶ ┄ WHAT YOU WANT !

summary: steve harrington wants you to make him a dad pairing: steve harrington / f!reader warnings: smut. literally just smut. not a hint of a plot. 18+ mdni a/n: here i am with another smutty steve headcanon, can u believe it? all of these asks are doing some irreversible damage to my psyche i think

( MASTERLIST )

anon, you're absolutely right

obv steve wants a family everyone knows that

so i feel like once he’s settled down with a pretty serious gf, he’s got baby fever to the extreme

he just wants to mark you from the inside out

which could also stem from his lil jealousy problem bc he wants everyone to know that you belong to him

he’s got you on your back with your legs thrown over his shoulders

one hand presses into your lower stomach as he fucks you like it might be the last time he’ll ever get to do it

he pounds into you with his head tilted back, mouth agape and eyes squeezed shut

“gonna fill you up. over and over and— holy shit— over again. get you all nice and round for me— fuck”

he doesn’t even realize what he’s saying

he’s just rambling bc you’re making him feel so goddamn good

“fuck, stevie...” you whine with a scrunched up face as you near your own peak

you’ve got one hand clutching the wrist of the one he's got resting against your belly

while your other trails down his torso

your nails leave red scratches on his skin as they weave through the hair at his chest and settle at his happy trail

your back bows when he thrusts into you as deep as he can possibly go

and the moan you let out then stems from your fucking soul or smth it’s so guttural

it’s borderline embarrassing but you’re not even focusing on that

you’re mainly concerned at how violently your legs have tensed and started to shake around his shoulders

“move your hand” he tells you, suddenly stern

it’s not a request

you hadn’t even recognized your feeble attempt to stop him from drilling into you

but he just wants you to lay there all pretty for him

and let him give you everything he has to give you like a good girl

all you can do is whine because he’s fucked you so stupid

“not gonna tell you again, sweetheart”

even with your hand pressing against him, he rolls his hips slowly against yours

you’re so full and he’s already so deep, you can almost feel him in your throat

the pleasure he so effortlessly gives you is borderline overwhelming but you listen to him anyway

and he doesn’t waste any time before giving you long, deep strokes into your fluttering cunt

“there you go, baby. just like that. just like that. always so good for me… s’gonna make me come in this pussy”

you whine beneath him and tears burn as they well in your eyes

you need him to come in you more than you need to breathe

but you’re already so sensitive that it’s made you terrified of any more pleasure

you just wanna be a good girl for the man fucking you for all your worth

“that what you want, honey? wanna have my kids?”

you’re nodding before you even realize it with your kiss-bitten bottom lip caught between your teeth

“yeah, i know you do, baby. that’s why you’re such a slut for my dick, isn’t it?”

you keen at that

his words have you creaming around his cock while your mouth hangs in a silent moan

and he keeps on fucking you through it, turning you out like it’s nothing

you need him to fill you up

you want so badly for him to fuck you until you’re leaking around him

and steve gives you exactly what you want without you have to say a goddamn thing

his hips stutter as he whines

“fuck, honey. i’m about to come in this pussy… gonna have you— shit, baby— gonna have you all barefoot and pregnant for me— fuck, fuck, fuck—”

he comes in you barely a second later

his warmth blossoms in you like a flower and your walls flutter around him, suckling him in with greed

and he whines while you milk him for all he’s worth

have any blurb requests? send 'em here if you want!

[loserboysandlithium]

There’s a First for Everything: Eddie Munson one shot

18+ Minors DNI

Summary: this is a series of one shots written in Eddie’s POV about his sexual experiences. ;) this one is the first time he got head. I hope you enjoy. 🖤 Chapter list found here .

Part one:

******

It started as a normal deal. She came by the house and I gave her the usual.

I couldn’t stop my eyes from roaming across her body. Her fishnets clinging to her thighs, her little skirt riding up as she sat down on my bed, shuffling through her purse.

“Twenty?” she asks, looking up at me with eyes that felt like they could pierce right fucking through me.

“Uh- you know what, this one’s on the house. I’m getting a new batch soon anyways so..” I trail off, glancing down at my black combat boots.

“Oh yeah? That’s really sweet, Eddie.” she purrs, her warm voice like fucking velvet.

“It’s nothing.. really.” I mumble and then I see the toes of her converse meet my boots. I glance up to see her face only inches from mine.

“Maybe I could thank you for it. Some other way.” she whispers, her lashes fluttering just a bit.

“What do you- oh fuck..” I let out a needy whimper as her hand meets my cock over my jeans.

“This okay, baby?” she steps closer, pressing her body against mine as she starts to trace the outline of my dick. I’m already rock hard. There’s no hiding how fucking excited I am.

“Y-Yes.” I stutter.

“Mmm.. you’re so big, Eddie.” she breathes out as her thumb reaches the head of my cock under the denim.

“Please. Can you.. touch me please? Do you do under the clothes stuff or..?” I blurt out, my cheeks blushing even brighter.

“You are adorable, Eddie Munson. I wanna suck your dick, baby.” she coos, and my eyes widen as she drops to her knees in front of me. Fucking hell.

“Fuck yes. P-Please.” I whine and she chuckles as she looks up at me with her doe eyes.

“Gonna make you feel so good.” She hums as she unbuttons my jeans, pulling them down slowly, finally releasing me from the prison of my own fucking pants. I can’t help but let out a soft whimper as my dick springs free, slapping hard against my stomach.

I watch her carefully, the anticipation making my cock twitch. She licks her pretty lips before taking me in her hand, stroking slowly.

"Oh fuck.." I moan, her soft hands moving up and down my dick. Her eye dart up to meet mine, a smirk adorning her beautiful face as she kisses the head of my cock before snaking her tongue around it.

“Goddamn..” I breathe out, my whole body tensing up under her touch. She works her way to the underside of my cock licking the full length, making my head fall back.

“Y/n… holy shit.” I groan, bringing my hands to her hair. I thread my fingers into her soft locks, not adding any pressure, letting her have full control.

She swirls her tongue all around, wetting every fucking inch of me.

Her hand begins to stroke me as her lips wrap around my tip and she begins to bob her pretty lips up and down.

Seriously, don’t fucking cum, Eddie.

She sucks back to the tip, pulling off with a little pop, knocking another pathetic moan from me. "Make me choke, Eddie." she pouts, looking up at me through her eyelashes.

I grip her hair and lightly start to push her head down, the action making her moan immediately.

"This- this is amazing." I pant breathlessly as her cheeks suck in creating even more stimulation on my cock.

I hold her hair even tighter and cautiously start to buck my hips, fucking her throat. Another moan vibrates across my dick as I look down at her, spit seeping from the sides of her mouth, her eyes watering.

She grips my ass tightly, pulling me deeper into her throat as I continue thrusting into her mouth, all the nervousness leaving my mind, the pleasure overwhelming every part of me.

“I’m- I’m gonna cum, y/n. I’m gonna fucking cum..” I grunt as she gags beautifully around my thick cock.

She continues to hollow her cheeks as I fuck deep into her throat, her nails digging into the skin of my ass.

My eyes roll into my head as I feel the familiar sensation. “Oh fuck. F-fuck baby.” I stutter just as my cum shoots into her mouth. My jaw falls slack as I pump her full of my release. She swallows around my dick making me whimper again.

She takes every last drop of my cum, moaning as she swallows it causing my entire body to shudder. She stands up from her place on the floor, wiping her lips free of drool and my excess cum before bringing her thumb to her lip sucking it clean.

“I think you almost killed me.” I chuckle and she rolls her eyes at me with a little smirk.

“You should see what else I can do.”

tag list: @hideoutside @hellfirenacht @battymunson @bl00d-puppy @gri959 @joannamuns9n @girlfuckthatwhore @harrycanyonmoonn @mrsjellymunson @little-wormwood @melifluorei-d @mrsmarch64 @avavolturi @munsonsblunt @yujyujj @eddie-munsonsbitch @oliskitten @jessicakennedy957 @costellation-hunter @ali-r3n @leelei1980 @lil-quinnie @asimpforthe80s @phoenyxrayne

[ajearthlinggg]

exposing you based on your fav will wood/wwatt song (my longest post)

A lot of these have nothing to do with the song. They're basically headcannons lmao. My Blake Jennings is showing

No instrumental chnt except Rhumba sorry

i started this in June enjoy

EIAL

6up 5oh copout: its low hanging fruit to say you hate cops, and I'm taking it. You hate cops.

Skeleton Appreciation whatever the fuck: Covid RUINED you

Front Street: you like Heathers

Aikido!: how's that obsessiveness and inability to let go going?

White Knuckle Jerk: you also like nu metal for the same reason. (Its incredibly horny)

Cover This Song: same as Aikido but only with your exes omg do not text them they are assholes

Thermodynamic Lawyer: PLEASE take time to calm down when you get overstimulated I promise if you don't do anything abt it you will have such a terrible mental breakdown

Red Moon: YOU LISTEN TO MALE MANIPULATOR MUSIC STOP TRYING TO HIDE IT YOU CANT BE IN THE RADIOHEAD CLOSET FOREVER

Lysergide daydream: I honestly do not like this song at all so you get a pass (don't kill me)

The First Step: you're usually quiet but you know how to SCREAM.

Jimmy Mushroom: you're usually quiet but- I'm just kidding. You're always quiet

Chemical Overreaction: you're usually quiet but if- I'm just kidding. You are never quiet

Everything is a lot/dte: insomnia. I dont know why,but insomnia

Self-ish

self/ish: closet theatre kid

2012: fast talker to a not comprehendible level

Cotard Solution: turn off the v-sauce it is 2 am

Mr. Capgras: turn off the 🌽 it is 2 am

The Song With Five Names: you have incredible taste. You can't describe that taste, but hey, its incredible

Hand me my shovel: you were the only talented kid in your elementary music class

Dr. Sunshine is Dead: you love the smell of cigarettes

TNA

Suburbia overture: BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD BPD

222: your English teacher loves you (you're so goddamn gay)

Laplace's Angel: your English teacher hates you. How do I know? Because you can't pronounce anything (its la-plass-es not la-place-is)

i/me/myself: you have to beat off the fake fan allegations with a stick everyday

Wbtta: hey queen. How are those hyperfixations going

Outliars and hyppocrates: you spell the title wrong every. damn. time.

bbw: same as 2012 but holy shit triple it.

Marsha, thankk you: dyslexia and ADHD

Love, me normally: I get it. I'm not even gonna expose you. You already have it bad enough

Momento Mori: you are just SO quirky! (knives whisper things to you when you hold them)

Icimi

Tomcat Disposables: you'd shove photos of your pets in your friends faces even if they were dangling off a bridge

Becoming the last names: you either have wonderful parents in a happy relationship or your parents have been divorced for years and you will never relate to this song

Cicada Days: stop using self deprecating humor around the wrong people PLEASE

Euthanasia: this song is a masterpiece I have nothing to say about you.

Falling Up: WONDERFUL TASTE. AMAZING CHOICE. NO RECOLLECTION OF YOUR CHILDHOOD.

That's enough: you love Alex g you just don't know it yet

Um its kind of a lot: you either already love Scott pilgrim or it will happen. Its a canon event

Half decade hangover: omg twinn!! I have an addictive personality, too!

(I feel like this is a good time to say don't take these too seriously)

You liked this: ...what?

The main character: you can't relate to the song, you hate yourself

Sdrr: IF I SEE ONE MORE PERSON TAKING THIS SONG SUPER SERIOUSLY IM GONNA LOSE MY SHIT YDHZJABXV

Bfb: ur just a silly lil guy

Willard!: you're a therian. There is no human explanation to this.

white noise: you love pink floyd you just don't know it yet

Atkf: HOW TF DID I FORGET THIS ONE anyways you get bad habits (nail biting, staying up too late. Etc)

CHNT

Yes to err: you are still waiting for chnt season 2 BC you want to see what happens with Adam

Your body, my temple: I have a strong feeling you have a tummy ache right now

Venetian Blind Man: you love nobody sexually you just don't know it yet (this is a very ace choice idk why)

Rhumba of Death: you LOVE Halloween

When Somebody Needs You: Tyler the Creator is probably your favorite rapper

Live

Trww

Self/ish: You can't sleep if your room has the SLIGHTEST amount of light in it

10-4 6-up: unlike the original, you don't just hate cops, you hate anybody who can tell you what to do (your teachers are probably just trying to do their job. please)

Cotards Solution: you can't sleep without background noise

Dr Sunshine Lives!: You never get sick physically (mentally on the other hand...)

Where do you get off: omg the horniest of the horny. Gerard Way on stage levels of horny. Nine Inch Nails levels of horny. (Or you really like Umbrella Academy idk why)

Aikido: you can't relate to it. You hate everybody

Take a break grab some water this is getting long

Thermodynamic Lawyer: you have gotten kicked out of restaurants because of how loud you are

Front Street: WE GET IT. IT'S BETTER THAN THE ORIGINAL.

Wasting away again: I am so sorry holy shit

Hand me my (x), I'm (y): you suck at algebra

The First Step: you wish you could do the AUGHHHHHHHH

2012: severe social anxiety

Mr capgras: literally the opposite of 2012 (live)

Chemical Overreaction: you know so many random fun facts

Fibrodysplasia: I'm not even gonna talk about your mental issues because I will be banned from this app (which is pretty much impossible)

Icid

Cicada Days: you also get a pass fuck I'm so sorry

The main character okay you ACTUALLY can relate to it

Icimi: OMG I LOVE YOU

atkf: you cry every day even if you aren't sad

Becoming the last names: please don't become a Disney adult

Vampire ref: LISTEN TO MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE I KNOW YOU'VE BEEN PUTTING IT OFF AND IK YOU LOVE HOT VAMPIRE MUSIC

Half decade hangover: oh my god talk to somebody it'll be okay I'm so sorry

Tsw5n: you love the way he says "what the fuck"

Euthanasia: once again, ANOTHER PASS. IM SO SORRY I HOPE YOU'RE OKAY

Jimmy Mushrooms: You. Me. Marriage. Now.

Laplaces Angel: you listen to LitWTC

i/me/myself: you were trying to separate yourself from the normal i/me/myself fans

The first step: idk why but you REALLY like lemonade

skeleton appreciation day: you can NOT play any instrument

tomcat disposables: you love concept albums

White noise: unlike cotards, you need to sleep in SILENCE

Love me normally: arctic monkeys. that's all I have to say. idk what about them but, yeah

misanthrapologist: GAY QUEER LGBT HOMOSEXUAL FRUITY ZESTY ROMANTICALLY ATTRACTED TO PEOPLE OF THE SAME GENDER

Falling up: wonderful taste once again please don't become a Disney adult

thats enough let's get you home: you say "YIPPIE!!" a lot

And if I did: god made you shy because he knew if you weren't you would be unstoppable

[trashmouth-richie]

Eddie x fem!reader. [vol I]

Summary: just a bit of Eddie’s shenanigans 😈

TW: no minors, angst, mentions of hard times.

W.C: 4.7k

A/N: hope you are all enjoy this! Thank you for all the love received on the first chapter 🥰

You spent the rest of the night questioning why you ever placed the ad in the paper to begin with. Certainly you could just go to sleep and you’d wake up to all of Eddie’s belongings gone because this was a nightmare.. right? Of course. You’d wake up any minute now and things would go back to the way they used to be.

////

//

-

Oh how you had hoped.

Eddie wearing your robe was just the tip of the iceberg of the stupid shit he would endure for the next 12 hours. After eating 7 slices of pizza, he wiped his greasy hands down the front of it. Settling for that instead of the arms of the couch after you had scolded him. He talked during the entire episode of The Nanny.

“Holy shit, she’s hot, I mean her voice is kinda nasally but woooowwweeeee.. you think she’s into metalheads? I bet she is. I bet she’d love to be wrapped all up in me, it'd be a secret though for her.” He talked with his mouth full, bits of cheese and pizza sauce flying from his lips and landing on his naked chest. His feet were propped up on the coffee table, toes wiggling like he was a child watching cartoons. “Got any chips? I’m hungry.”

He left a mess wherever he went. The chips he begged you for were still sitting open on the couch. Crumbs decorated the upholstery like confetti at a New Year’s Eve party. His pizza plate on the coffee table, holding an impressive amount of beer cans. Instead of hanging your robe back up on its proper hook in the bathroom, he left it on the floor in between the living room and the hallway. You had gone to bed after he insisted on belching “Love Bites” with three beers tucked between his legs. It was at this moment you thought of begging Steve and Robin to move in with you instead.

“For the last time, I refuse to try to out burp you, I will not be duct taping beers to my hands, and for the love of god if you get salsa on the carpet I will skin you alive.”

“It puts the lotion on its skin….”

You stomp to bed, slamming your bedroom door and throwing the covers over your head. You can hear Eddie slurring through your bedroom walls.

“C’mon Tooooty, I thought we were having a slumber party. You didn’t even paint my nails yet!” His small hiccuping giggles turn into a roar of laughter lasting entirely too long.

-

The next morning you wake up to your alarm, it’s peaceful, content. Today is a new day and you have a busy schedule working at the salon. Saturdays are easily the most hectic at Josie’s. It seems it’s the only day off for most people to come in and get their hair done. You dress in a simple black tank top tucked into a black mini skirt, a form fitting denim vest over top, and black chunky slide sandals. Spritzing yourself with your Exclamation perfume you just have to brush your teeth and grab a little breakfast.

Upon opening your bedroom door you are hit with a stench so ungodly, it makes the hair stand up on your arms. Did a fucking tornado crash through your home? How hard were you sleeping? You felt like Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz only in reverse, while she was mystified by the sights around her you were full of rage, disgust, and sheer anger.

Eddie.

For fucks sake it is almost as if he needed a goddamn babysitter.

Beer cans litter the floor. A silver ball made of duct tape was sitting on the couch, the small tv was still on. All your VHS’s were scattered along the floor by the entertainment center. A plate of what looked like hardened shredded cheese was balancing on the edge of the coffee table. Rolling papers, and two joints were piled on top of it, along with various baggies of god knows what. Chips were ground into the carpet, their sharp edges making the carpet glitter with nacho cheese and tortilla shrapnel. And sitting opened and probably now dry, was the blue nail polish you had gotten with Robin. The whole place reeked of the dirty rotten scent of spilled stale beer soaking cotton fabric, the remnants of weed wafting from the furniture baking into the fibers from the sun streaming through the windows in lazy strips of golden yellow.

Homicide is probably what? 10 years? You could manage that.

You make your way into the culprits room, swearing under your breath and feeling the sweat start on the back of your neck. Pushing through the heap of clothes and worn boots, you find the prince of trash laying on his back, soft snores escaping his slack mouth. There aren’t even sheets on his mattress, just mountains of his belongings.

A beer is taped crudely to his left hand, your brand new bottle of jergens lays next to him along with a playboy— flipped open to a brunette with obvious fake tits and her lips placed into an orgasm. He apparently threw some boxers on during his midnight raccoon shenanigans.

This is comparable to bringing home a dog from the humane society, you aren’t sure how they’ll act but once you go to sleep— all hell breaks lose.

“Eddie,” you yell, loud enough that your own ears are ringing. He doesn’t move a muscle, just a loud snore erupting from him. You kick at his legs, push his body around but nothing. If it weren’t for the snoring you probably should have called a coroner.

One last slap against his bare chest and he finally groans, “gimme five more minutes baby and I promise I’ll rock your world.” Jesus Christ.

Fuck it, just go to work, you can deal with him when you get home. Breath in and out. Nope— the fuse that was lit in your brain from Eddie’s mess inches its way slowly towards the dynamite, licking up the wick. Also like a dog from the shelter, they need to be trained, told when they are doing something wrong, and immediately corrected.

Filling a cup with cold water you waltz back into his room a smile plastered to your lips.

The splash of water against Eddie’s face is music to your ears as he gasps for breath. Spluttering and sitting up, spilling the beer taped to his hand, he looks like a cat that was thrown in the tub, long curls soaking wet, his bangs parted and thrown back from the force of the water hitting him.

“Damn sweetheart, I said give me five minutes and I’d give you all ten inches of my co—” the plastic cup bounces off of Eddie’s head. “Okay, ow. Goddamn what was that for?!”

“What was that for?! Look around Eddie!” You motion around the house as he stands up holding his head and pressing the palm of his right hand into his eye, dragging it down his face to wipe the remnants of cold water away, “this place is disgusting!”

You begin to list off everything wrong, as you walk around the house, Eddie following begrudgingly behind you, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. You point out the chips in the carpet, the hardened cheese plate, the vhs mess. Each and everything you show him your voice gets higher and higher and louder and louder. The rage bubbling up in your body as you huff around. A large hand and the odd sensation of a rubbery plastic mass spin you around, holding onto your shoulders.

Eddie’s face is so close to yours, you can see the sun reflecting off the usual darkened browns of his eyes, bringing a goldmine to the muddy surface.

“Tooty— it’s far too early for this shit,” he speaks slowly, the Cheshire Cat like grin on his stupid face spreads across his lips revealing his straight white teeth, “you need to relax a little bit.” He notices the weight of the beer can and tips it back into his mouth, chugging the rest of it and smacking his lips when he’s done. Adding a deafening belch upwards to the ceiling.

You curl your lip in disgust and shove his arm off of you. “What? Hair of the dog baby, gotta keep drinking to avoid a hangover.”

Crossing your arms and taking a step back from him, you take a deep breath, “I don’t know how you lived in the trailer park, and frankly— I don’t give a fuck—but, you will not, make a mess of my house. Either, clean this shit up before I get home from work, or I’ll personally move your crap out to the lawn. Got it?”

His smile fades, and his eyebrows pull together, eyes squinted. The hum of the ceiling fan is the only noise in the house. “Are you threatening me at 7:30 in the morning?” he asks, checking his watch, towering over you. No doubt he is trying to freak you out.

It takes everything in you to not slap him upside the head.

You stand your ground, not letting his carved jaw and mean eyed demeanor get the best of you.

“Damn right I am. I’ll have your shit lying on the lawn like a horrendous Halloween yard sale. Just because the whole town thinks you're some psycho, bastard doesn’t mean I do— you don’t scare me, Munson,” his surname falling from your lips like agent orange, thick and heavy painting the air around you both. Your head held high, eyes glaring back into his. His bravado falters and he also crosses his arms, matching your energy.

“Maybe you should pull the stick out of your ass before it splinters, babe.” Eddie chides back, lips spreading manically across his face.

Neither of you will let the other win, and if you didn’t have to go to work, you would stand here all day arguing with him. You poke a manicured nail into his chest. “You owe me a new bottle of lotion.” With that you push past him and make your way into the bathroom to finish getting ready.

“It was either that or the mayonnaise, sweetheart!”

-

You had always found comfort working at Josie’s. She had taken you on immediately after finishing Cosmetology school at Empire Beauty School in Indianapolis, giving you full time hours and helping you buy your supplies. Nancy had dropped down to part time, working for both the Hawkins Post and cutting hair on the side. Josie was like an older sister to you, and you loved her dearly.

After doing matching perm sets on a mother and daughter, a trim on your regular client, Audrey, and catching up with the latest gossip from Molly about her date that ended with them making out in his car—it was time for your lunch break.

The leftover half of a tuna salad sandwich stared you down from its cellophane wrapper, begging you to ingest the soggy yet stale bread. A stomach ache waiting to happen. Tossing it into the trash, you settle for Marlboro menthols and a Diet Coke. The sun is high in the sky, begging you to enjoy it.

You shed your vest as you sit on the back patio, leaning your head against the neon pink and white striped plastic pool chair lounger, stretching your legs out and kicking off your sandals. You accept the sun’s rays into your skin. Sunglasses poised on your face and a cigarette tucked between your mauve painted lips, you pretend you’re in a movie.

But you’re not— you’re in the middle of Butthole, Indiana. The only exciting thing that happened here was the possibility of hearing the latest town gossip about someone’s cousin, friend, or ex getting knocked up by the high school football star.

You longed for a day off where you and Robin could enjoy the once luxurious but not desolate woods of Lover’s Lake. Nothing but the peaceful breeze to fill your mind and the light rustle of the leaves.

Nancy pulled the blue matching chair up next to you, curling her legs beneath her as you silently pull your lighter from your pocket and hand it to her. A small cloud of smoke dances around your face as she lights her cigarette inhaling deeply.

“Ready for the honeymoon?” You ask her as she inches her way down the seat, a slight squeak to the rubbery plastic as she settles her body in.

Nancy and Jonathan had gotten married two months ago. The wedding was pristine and beautiful in typical Nancy fashion. Her glorious curls in a French twist, soft tendrils framing her youthful face. A pearl colored lace gown billowing behind her and sleeves puffed around her shoulders with dainty lace decorating down her delicate wrists. She looked incredible.

You cried standing beside Holly and El in your peach colored satin gowns, wiping your eyes when they read their nuptials, vowing to be together during sickness and in health. Will, Argyle, and Mike stood beside Jonathan trying like hell to stand upright as the bachelor party spilled into the midnight hours, Mike, paler than usual and Will, drenched with sweat under the beaming lights of the church. Argyle was the only one smiling through the entire ceremony, moving his head to the rhythm of the organ.

Karen had wept and gathered you into a tight hug for helping style the bridal party’s hair that morning, and for being such a wonderful roommate to Nancy. Ted checked his watch every half hour, and kept an eye on the punch which seemingly looked to get darker and darker throughout the night.

Joyce and Hopper held each other close and danced slow to every song played. Their undying love for one another evident on their faces.

A very drunk Murray Bauman hollered obscenities behind the bar, obviously taking advantage of the open bar night as he mixed drinks for the Wheeler and Byer wedding guests, heavy on the liquor. It wasn’t until grandma Wheeler grabbed the mic and started singing Frank Sinatra that someone caught on to Murray’s antics.

You had danced and laughed along with your high school classmates all night, spilling champagne and beer onto the community center floor, the bottom of

Nancy’s dress turned an ugly smoke gray. It was a perfect summer wedding, one that all of Hawkins would be talking about for years to come.

Nancy stretched her back and twisted her neck to look at you, blue eyes peering over round colored lenses, “Yes, I can’t wait to dip my toes in the ocean,” she says beaming, “we’ve been going to the pool pretty often these last few weeks trying to tan Jonathan a little bit so he doesn’t burn like a piece of bread in Cancun.”

A giggle bubbles on her lips as you laugh along with her. “Any luck on finding a roommate?”

You had been dreading this conversation. Originally you had hoped that Erica Sinclair or even Max would maybe want to be your roommate. Sadly they were both either starting college or finishing up their degree this year—Lucas turned down a full ride basketball scholarship to be with Max. Even the boys had places to go. Dustin and Suzy were finishing their summer internships and moving in together—he had plans on proposing after summer’s end. Will lived in Indianapolis, he became a teacher’s aid after finishing his Bachelor’s in Fine Arts, hoping to one day become a professor. Mike and El lived in Hopper’s cabin, tucked deep in the woods. Celebrating being together for almost 10 years. It was quite literally just you— single, and desperate for a roommate.

“Yeah— I uhh— they moved in last night actually,” you said through a wall of smoke nonchalantly. Lighting another cigarette to power through this conversation.

Nancy is picking at her cuticles and flipping through Cosmo as she asks who answered the ad.

A nervous laugh surpasses your lips, “Eddie,” you say in almost a question.

Nancy stops moving entirely. The ash from her cigarette threatening it’s length. She shakes her head and corrects herself, “Sorry, I think I had a stroke… did you say Eddie? As in Eddie Munson?”

You throw your arm over your eyes and slip further into the chair, hoping it would swallow you whole. A groan escapes your lips followed by your confirmation.

“There was no one else! Everyone is off at school, or getting engaged— he was the only one to show up and look at the house! Plus he forked out more cash than I had originally been asking for so obviously he can afford the rent.”

“Probably drug money,” Nancy coughed.

“Honestly I don’t care if he robbed a bank, the money is there and right now—” the threat of what your life could become stings like a wasp in your brain, red ink showing final notice, light switches not working due to the electricity being shut off, before Eddie moved in— you were well on your way to that lifestyle. “that is what matters.”

Nancy huffs in disagreement, taking a breath to settle her nerves. “I don’t know him personally— but just be careful. Wait, wasn’t he friends with—”

“Yup.” You quip, tight lipped and short, “Robin and Steve know him too.”

“That's what I had thought, well at least he’s not like, a total stranger then.”

Nancy listens intently to the horrors of the past 24 hours at the house she once lived in. Twisting her wedding ring around her small fingers, she had never been more thankful to be married.

-

The work day ended later than you had hoped, a last minute client showed up begging for a “quick perm” — as if there were such a thing. You waved goodbye as you reminded her of the strict no washing policy when it came to maintaining her curls in place. You sweep the floor in a rush and place your combs and scissors in the blue barbicide. Putting away the perm rods and wiping down the surfaces. Switching over the laundry so at least the towels would be dry by the time you opened on Monday morning.

You were tired and your back felt a little stiff. You shut off the radio, still humming Material Girl, to yourself as you turned off the lights and locked the door.

The drive home was short, your small Ford escort a blur through the streets of Hawkins. You could hear your bed calling you, maybe you’d make yourself a grilled cheese and do some laundry so you wouldn’t have to do it tomorrow. But when you pulled into your driveway you realized you wouldn’t be relaxing at all tonight.

The garage door was pulled open, a makeshift banner with red and black spray painted letters on it spelled out “Corroded Coffin”, a better glance at it and you could see it was the same pattern as your spare bed sheets that you kept in the linen closet. The garbage cans were moved out of the way and tossed into the front yard. Cords from amps and a microphone were plugged into every outlet your small garage could offer. A drum set was in the back beside the shelf that held old paint cans full of lead. The floppy blond haired idiot slammed a Busch Light as he twirled a drumstick in his hand. Two members of the band were head banging along to the guitar solo that Eddie was plucking away at. His fingers moved fluidly over the fretboard. Years of practice evident in the dexterity of his hands. The muscles in his arms tight and flexed, veins protruding around them. There were beer cans scattered all around them. Another dirty thirty, no doubt. Fries were spilling out of empty fast food bags and greasy burger wrappers were littering the ground. The push mower was laying on its side, in the middle of the driveway. The rake snapped in half.

The slam of your car door goes unheard.

The unhinged quirk of your jaw starts to ache as you clench your teeth, stomping towards the garage band. The guitar solo ends just as you get to the garage. They’re all hollering and cheering as Eddie whips his head back, long sweaty strands of his curls whipping around as he tries to catch his breath. Holding the beer at arms length, he pours it into his mouth, light amber colored lager flowing down his chin and the expanse of his neck.

“Fuckin’ told you Jeff,” Eddie says, throwing the beer to the ground at the other guitarists feet, “don’t matter if its been five or fifteen years— I can still play that Master of Puppets solo.” A smug smile spreads across his mouth as he pulls a joint from his back pocket, and lights it between lips.

Jeff swings his guitar off his neck and places it on one of the amps, “yeah, yeah whatever man— you gonna share that or just keep gloating?”

You are standing on the driveway, hands on your hips, weight balancing on one leg, the other straight out, foot tapping in annoyance, waiting for the band of rejects to notice your throat clearing.

“Tooty!” They all yell in unison.

Your expression doesn’t fade. Jaw unhinged, lips pressed together tightly. The icy cold of your stare burrowing into Eddie’s beer and sweat soaked skin, a hazy film around him as he exhales the joint.

“Aww, sweetheart, what’s the matter?” He says with fake concern, a smirk curled on his lips, “you mad you missed the jam sesh?” Eddie croons, the tip of the joint goes red as he inhales again and passes it to Jeff, “don’t worry we do this every other night I’m sure you’ll catch the next one.”

The garage fills with echoing drunk laughs and the asshole on the drums hits a ba dum tss. Causing Eddie to choke on his exhale and start a coughing fit. He’s doubled over laughing as he forces the smoke from his lungs.

“Not here you’re not.”

He looks from you to the guys, all four dumbstruck by your words.

“Please tell me, Tooty, why I, a paying resident of this house,” he says, gesturing wildly around him, taking long legged steps towards you, head dipping and turning to catch your gaze, “am not ‘allowed’ to practice with my band, in a garage that we share?”

He’s lowering his head down to you, the ends of his sweaty curls licking your cheeks as he closes the gap between you, rubbing a hand across his chin, that same smirk on his face as always.

“Hmm?”

You let out an exhausted sigh. After a long day at work the only thing you had wanted to do was relax— not deal with Eddie’s antics.

“I’m not going to entertain your little half-witted dreams from middle school on being the next Kirk Hammett— find somewhere else to play rockstar, and get this shit out of here.”

You shove past him and the band as you stomp through the door leading into the kitchen, hanging up your keys. A quick look around made your head spin.

The house looked worse now than it did when you left for work. Dishes piled along each surface on the counters and into the sink, the microwave was open with what looked like the remnants of a spaghetti-o explosion, a beer can pyramid was starting in the living room. A burnt aluminum pan of jiffy pop sat on the stove, charred on the bottom. The trash bag suitcases Eddie had packed his belongings with, were now thrown in between his room and the hallway.

You were fed up with this bullshit, it had been 24 hours and he was already on your last nerve. Dragging both hands down your face in sheer fatigue, you grab a roll of trash bags from under the sink. Walking heavy footed back to the door, making as much noise as possible, you fling open the door, four pairs of wide eyes stare you down as you shake open the garbage bag.

“Here, let me help you because apparently you don’t have any common fucking sense.” You stomp over to Eddie and rip another bag free from the roll and toss it to him.

In the best condescending tone you can muster you explain, “This, is a garbage bag. Oooh, ahhh. Cool right? See? When you are done with something and it’s empty,” you educate the gaggle of degenerates, “you pick it up, and throw it away! Wow.” You demonstrate for them, picking up an empty can of beer and placing it in the bag.

“See how easy that is? Now,” you say turning towards Eddie your eyes lost of any endearment, “Do you think you big boys could handle that? Or do you need written instructions?”

A scoff is heard from behind you, as it’s now your turn to smirk, stomping back up the steps and into the kitchen, slamming the door hard behind you.

-

Huffing and puffing, you know that the house will never get clean if you don’t do it yourself. You change into a faded Hawkins High shirt and a pair of old worn cotton shorts with paint smears on the hips from when you and Nancy tackled painting the living room last summer, as you set to work on the kitchen. Pulling on a pair of rubber yellow gloves, you make work on cleaning the mess Eddie had made. The soft hum of your kitchen radio plays as Pearl Jam invades the background. You first fill the sink with the hottest water the faucet allowed, dousing the dishes with dish soap. You’re carrying around the garbage can, picking up empty beer cans, cigarette butts, and the charcoal mess of black popcorn on the the stove.

You don’t hear him enter the kitchen, your mind far away to another time, when Nancy lived with you and the only problem she caused was paying rent a week early. He advances towards you and stops in front of you, nostrils flaring as he takes a deep breath.

“What’s your fuckin’ problem? You can be a bitch to me all you want, but the guys don’t deserve that.”

You set the garbage can down by your feet, a rubber glove shoved into his chest, “If you think I give a fuck about what they deserve, you are sadly mistaken! I deserve to not have my house completely trashed every time I turn my back!”

“I didn’t know I was living in a fucking convent, Sister Tooty.” Eddie argues, proud of his comeback he leans against the counter, arms folded across his chest, “that why you never get laid?”

You roll your eyes, “fucking yourself with a beer can taped to your hand isn’t exactly getting laid, Munson. But keep it up, you won’t be living here for long if you keep acting like a fucking pig!”

“Again, with your empty threats, sweetheart. Isn’t it tiring being so mad all the time— careful, looks Iike you’re already getting wrinkles.” A throaty laugh escapes his mouth and he sweeps his thumb between your eyebrows, trying to joke around and diffuse the tension growing between you both.

You swat your hands at him and pull away, a look of disgust and frustration planted on your face.

“Jesus,” he says irritated, “Harrington told me that your family moved away— didn’t know it was because you’re such a stone-cold bitch.”

Without even thinking, you shove him hard in the chest. He goes crashing backwards, the rest of the cluttered items on the counter cascade to the floor with loud thuds. Your cheeks are heated, and your eyes glisten with tears, but you won’t give him the satisfaction of seeing them fall. You look at your socked feet and back up to him. Your lip quivering, head held high.

His expression is stunned, not angry like you thought he would be. A look of worry washes over his face as he realizes he crossed the line. Anger ran its course as he recognizes that he hurt you.

“Ah fuck,” he breathes, putting his head down and shaking his long mane. He looks back up to your face, still steady, not daring to let those traitorous tears fall.

“Tooty, I’m— I’m sorry.”

You pluck off your rubber gloves and toss them to the counter, making a dash to the bathroom and locking the door. Eddie doesn’t hear your crying, drowned out from the shower head as he starts to clean up his mess.

vol iii

—

A/N: thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed! If your name is crossed out on the Taglist it means your settings are more than likely set to private and you’re not allowed to be tagged!

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[heathermason6060]

Daryl Dixon x f!Reader: Together Apart Ch.3

Warnings/Mentions: Merle being Merle, History of abuse, neglect, strong language, mentions of character death, alcohol and drug abuse, ptsd, shared trauma, reader is cold, angst, fluff, eventual smut, slowburn, angst

Summary: You reminisce on the old days spent with Merle and Daryl.

Notes: This is mostly flashbacks to life growing up with Daryl and Merle, the good ole days :D Merle says some homophobic and probably racist stuff, cause he's Merle

“Dude, just go apologize, holy shit. You're worse than the teenage girls I went to school with.”

“Mind your own goddamn business. S’between me and Merle.” 

“He's got a point. You're acting shifty as hell. What happened to leaving? Huh? We've got Merle back, nothing's changed, these people still see us as redneck trash, can we just go already?”

“Said mind your business.”

Hindsight is a bitch.

You were five years old when you met Daryl and Merle for the first time. Unless your memory served you wrong, it was the fourth of July, and the trailer park was getting together to set off a bunch of illegal fireworks. You were sitting with your family as your neighbors got everything ready, a few of them grilling hotdogs and hamburgers. Your father had brought your mother a burger, which she split with you.

Your father was the only black sheep in your lives at that point in time. Anyone could tell just by looking at him that he didn't belong there, in a dingy trailer covered in blotches of mildew and rust. He was always clean shaven, no tattoos, perfect white teeth. He never smoked, never did drugs, never even drank. Even his name stood out among the Tammys, the Justins, Tuckers, Mandys, the Brandons and the Krystals. He was a Sebastian. He always wore clean clothes, and it was a stark contrast to your mother, who was the whole reason he was there in the first place. 

She was nothing like him. She had a beautiful face, sure, but that was about the only thing beautiful about her. Most of her teeth were yellow from cigarettes and drugs, some of them missing, and the molars in the back had eventually all turned black. She was never seen without a cigarette in her fingers, her nails a different bright color everyday. Her clothes always stank of cigarettes and BO, but despite all of that, she wasn’t all that much of a terrible human. Not until later on.

Your mother loved your father, and he loved her. She loved you too, even if she was mean most of the time, she never hit or screamed at you until he left. After that she took a dark turn, becoming a woman you grew to despise. She blamed you for him leaving, but  you knew the truth, she was the reason. She’d relapsed one too many times and he had enough, he left and he took you with him, but CPS ultimately dragged you kicking and screaming from your grandmother's house back to the prison that was your trailer.

That fourth of July was one of the last good memories you had with your parents. Your mother had been clean for seven months, and she looked stunning that night in her pink sundress and purple nail polish. She brought you a freeze pop and you ate it like it was a gourmet dessert, sitting beside her on the grass as you watched your neighbors set up the fireworks. 

When you finished eating you went to play with the group of kids, they would end up becoming your last resemblance of a friend group, a pair of girls your age and a handful of boys. One of the older boys made a rude comment about the DIxon brothers, and you decided to introduce yourself. 

Merle was about sixteen then, maybe seventeen, but he treated you and Daryl like you were the same age, something you deeply admired about him. You threw rocks at beer bottles behind their trailer, and you smoked your first cigarette there, hacking your lungs out, much to their amusement. Merle bragged and showed off his father's gun and crossbow collection, and soon after that their mother shooed you all out of the house like stray cats. 

You wished you could say the three of you became thick as thieves after that, but truthfully you didn't have many memories with them. To echo the point, you weren’t really friends. Just people with similar situations that lived near each other.

You took a deep drag of Daryl's cigarette and pulled away from him, holding it in your lungs. 

He didn’t say anything, and neither did you. You sat in silence, your legs hanging off the bridge you sat upon, sharing one of your last cigarettes. 

You turned a spent shell casing over in your fingers as Daryl flicked the butt into the river below. It was Merle's bullet casing, you knew that, the three of you had been on that bridge a few days prior when he let off a few shots into a small group of walkers. It was small, from the little .22 pistol that he’d borrowed from you. He’d never given it back, and it pained you to assume it was most likely still in his waistband, stuck to his rotting corpse until some other survivor came along and took it. 

“C’mon. Let's get back.” Daryl grunted as he hopped off the ledge and slung his crossbow over his shoulder. This was the only thing he said to you for the rest of the day, and for a while after that. 

Once you had said that your odds of survival were higher when there were more people around. World views change fast, apparently, because when the prison group took in the Woodbury citizens, you felt more at risk than when it had been a group of ten. 

Though you always despised the word ‘outcast’, it was the only word good enough to describe your place in the prison. 

It was easier when Merle had been there. It was only a few days but it was nice, you found yourself making an effort to hang out with him more, something he secretly appreciated. There wasn't anyone in his life anymore that enjoyed spending time with him, aside from Daryl. But some days it felt like not even his baby brother wanted to be around him. 

“You know how to fish?” You had asked him one evening as the two of you walked back from a supply run mostly empty handed. 

“Do you know who you're talkin' to sweetheart? Course I know how to fish.” 

You sat on the riverbank as he dumped his fourth trout into your bucket of water. You had caught one small catfish, and that seemed to do wonders for his pride, it gave him another thing to brag about doing better than anyone else in camp. 

“Little asskickers gonna have her first taste of good ole American fish tonight.” Merle laughed proudly, wiping his hands on his pants. 

“I don't think babies can eat fish. I don't think they can eat anything but formula.” You commented and stood from your spot, pulling in your makeshift fishing line. 

“A lil’ fish can't hurt.”

“No, seriously. I don't think she can have any.”

“Psh.” He muttered and picked up the bucket. “Useless fuckers. Can't eat, can't speak, can't walk, hell.”

Before the outbreak, you'd spent the most time with the eldest Dixon brother. Only to buy or trade drugs, occasionally getting high together, but it was still time spent in each other's presence. He very much enjoyed doing speed and teaching you things, normally how to shoot different types of guns, or just sitting in some random person's house listening to his rants about racism, homophobia, whatever he felt passionate about that day. 

“It just ain't natural, and I said, you couldn't pay me a cold million to touch one of you shitlickers. Yessir.” He was laughing then, amused in his retelling of some high school escapade that you weren't really paying attention to. Merle could be tasteless at times, and it was of no interest to you, you were enjoying your expensive high and there was no way in hell you were going to ruin it by getting into an argument with someone like him. 

You must've dozed off, because the long, drawn-out yell of your name had your heavy head lolling back up to see Merle a foot away from you. A grin split onto his face and he slapped your shoulder. “C'mon. Got a hot date, wouldn't look too good bringin’ your ass around. Get up. C'mon now!” 

Maybe you should've stuck around, cause he ended up getting a nasty case of gonorrhea from her. About a week later you found out from the man himself, standing in front of the coolers in your local gas station. They didn't sell gas anymore, too expensive, but they didn't lose any customers. 

“Should'a known a bitch that ugly would be crawlin’ with it.” He cursed, hiking up a six pack of beer on his shoulder as he followed you to checkout, his little shadow following behind.

“Told ya. Just didn't listen.” Daryl muttered, swiping a pack of cigarettes to slip into his back pocket. 

“Yeah, well, that's cause you don't know jack shit about women. The hell would I listen to you for?” 

“Even I could've told you that.” You spoke around the SlimJims between your lips as you handed the cashier a crumpled up ten dollar bill. She said nothing about you obviously being underaged and buying a cheap bottle of wine, everyone in town knew about your mother. “That's what you get for being a dick to that poor kid.”

“You talkin' about that-” The noisy chime of the bells above the front door covered his derogatory choice of words. 

“Those men, yeah. Don't know why it's so hard for you to leave people alone.”

“Cause it's America sweetheart, ain't no place for that kind of degeneracy here.” 

You bit back your quip concerning the women he surrounded himself with and looked to Daryl, who was too busy flipping through an obscene magazine to notice.

You weren't the model student after your father left. Most days were spent by yourself in the surrounding woods, fucking around until the buses prepared to leave. On the rare occasion that you had company, it was usually the senior you bought drugs from. He was weird, overly gentle with a very soft voice, something about him extremely off putting. 

Maybe things would've been different if you had been friends with Daryl back in school. He had only gone for a little while, using any and every excuse to get out of that house, even if it did include going from one prison to another. You weren't sure when he dropped out (technically he didn't drop out, he just stopped showing up), but it was right around the time Merle was out of prison. 

They left their father then, moving from couch to couch, and eventually ended up staying with another dealer you were vaguely familiar with. 

“Holy shit, look at you!” Merle whistled playfully after realizing it was you that had just come through the door. 

“The fuck? Merle?” You could barely recognize him. He looked so different from the last time you saw him, hardened by the months in prison. Daryl looked different too, he'd started growing some facial hair and looked a bit larger as well. It had been about a year or two since your last encounter, so it was to be expected. They stood up from the couch they sat on to greet you, Merle offering you a hit from his glass pipe, which you declined. 

“Nah, you know I never liked that shit.”

Merle snickered and held his lighter flame under the glass orb. “Right, right. Forgot you were too classy for crystal. Only the,” he tapped the side of his nostril, “for you.”

You caught up in the dealer's living room, some guy named Jesse, and enjoyed your purchases. You were happy then, for a few reasons. Jesse's shit was a lot better than what you were used to, so you found yourself a new reliable source, but also because you got to see Daryl again. You got to see him laughing, joking, no black eyes or busted lips. You got time with them as they were, before the world changed. 

You found yourself missing that time, watching as Daryl flung dirt over his shoulder into the grass behind him. It was the present, and you were sitting beside the hole he dug, too hungry to help. You'd forgotten to eat breakfast that morning and it was too early for lunch to be ready, whatever it was Carol or Beth had fixed up for the prison members. 

“What do you think Jesse's up to?” 

Daryl squinted against the sun to focus on you, momentarily pausing his digging. “Who?”

“That dealer you guys used to stay with. Beanie guy.” 

“Oh, yeah. Shit.” He grunted and stretched his back, happy for a break from grave digging. “Hell, I don't know. Probably dead.”

“You think? He seemed pretty tough to me.”

Daryl laughed abruptly at that. “Guy was a prick, but he wasn't no ‘tough guy’. Would go straight to usin’ guns instead of fightin’ like a real man.” 

You would never discover the fate of Jesse, but the decision to bring Daryl's mind back to wander in the past did wonders for bringing the two of you closer once again. 

To everyone's surprise, including you, Daryl dealt with his brother's death far better than you had. You'd expected he'd want to leave after that, go live alone and shut out everyone else. He didn't though, he cried a few times, sure, he got distant and chose to only keep you as company, but while you were still angry and grieving, he was laughing and forming bonds with the new group members. 

You weren't too sure why Merle's death had devastated you that much, the two of you weren't exactly best friends. Maybe it was due to the fact that he was one of the only two things keeping you connected to your past life, even though it was awful, it was better than the constant looming threat of being eaten by dead people. As shitty as your mundane life was, it would have gotten better, one day you would've been stronger than your mother and you would've stood up for yourself, put an end to the physical abuse, and if you were lucky you could've been able to leave and find your father and brother. 

Now Daryl truly was the only bit that remained, not counting material possessions. 

The same went for Daryl as well. The difference between you and him though was that the loss of his brother turned into a good thing. He was no longer a shadow of another human, no longer basing his ideals and opinions on said human. While you dealt with the pain by using Daryl as a crutch, he used it to find out who the unbiased Daryl was, abandoning the ‘Merle Dixon’s kid brother' persona. 

@ophelialaufey @carlgrimesgfofficial @theskinniestjackson-denny @dilfish-daydreams @my1fx

[erenfox]

RANKING SBG SHIPS BECAUSE LOKI GAVE US ALL FREE WILL 🗣🗣🗣🔥🔥🔥

Aidlyn/Ashden: good lord the chemistry. the 'he fell first but she fell harder' trope. the lil gestures by aiden. him annoying tf out of her but also becoming very caring when she's hurt. I'M SO CALM RN GUYS. and the fact that them ending up together is inevitable lmfao XD 9/10

Benlor: FUCKKK IM SERIOUSLY NOT OK THESE TWO ARE JUST SO PURE AND SWEET TO EACH OTHER. ESPECIALLY TAYLOR TOWARDS HIM, cuz he kinda suppresses his feelings and is a sad boi :( dw ben taylor's gonna make you feel happy again fosho lmao 😭 the lil blushing ben always does around taylor! her supporting his ideas even tho they flop! her helping him calm down from barron through music! her always cheering him up whenever he's gloomy! her being the first to thank him for opening up! THEY'RE LITERALLY THE DEFINITION OF SHE FELL FIRST BUT HE FELL HARDER! GOD IM SO NORMAL ABOUT THEM 😭😭😭 10/10

Tylenol/Tylo: i never thought of the prospect of them together, but post tumblr i must say its interesting. not just them being the single ones in the team, but i like the way tyler defended logan against barron, and his general protective aura around logan. but then again tyler was kinda rude to logan in the start. but then again it gives nerd x jock vibes which to me r pretty cool 5/10

Tyden: LMAO the continuous saga of them pissing tf out of each other. it would be fuckin hilarious if they somehow end up together. but apart from the general hilarious bickering, there's not too much to it 5/10

Tayden: goddamn their friendship is so precious!! her painting his nails? her carrying him on his shoulders in dat one artwork?PURE BESTIE VIBES they just match each other's freak lmfao. 8/10

Logden: meh there are not any significant moments between these two. would definitely be cute, but i can't see it happening lol 2/10

Loglor/Taygan: no but why can i actually see this happening lol. the way theyre both so gentle around each other! then the way she was the first to help him when he got slashed by the phantom? and also the way she stood up for him when tyler was being rude? Cute! 6/10

Benlyn: ooh the two quiet people of the gang! they could work out really well bcoz they definitely understand each other's struggles with muteness and phantom hearing respectively. plus that panel of ben braiding ashlyn's hair was so cute lmao :> 7/10

Loglyn: AAA they have sm potential!!! before the events of yk the whole ✨sAvAnNaH✨ mess, i feel like they wouldve been each other's only existing acquaintance they may call friends (ik it's not canon but it's very plausible lol) 6/10

Benlo/Logben: theyd definitely be good together, it's just that my sbg memory is failing to recall any significant moments b/w them ;-; if y'all remember pls do tell 4/10

Tyben: what is with the hernandez siblings always ending up being bens biggest supporters lmao XD it's a cute dynamic honestly 5/10

Taylyn: now this is one freakin adorable ship TvT. the way taylor always had a slight pang of concern for a friendless lonely ashlyn when they were kids? and the way they quite frankly became besties after enduring all the phantom world shit? very sweet lmao 7/10

Tylyn/Ashler: i have been usurped into the tylyn propaganda by @tragedry honestly I DO NOT COMPLAIN. like holy fuck they're so enemies to lovers! them "loathing" each other, fighting for leadership, but then immediately becoming possibly the biggest protectors of each other in times of danger??? extremely wholesome lmao i love them smmm 9/10

SO THE TOP SHIPS ARE:

3. TAYDEN (the crack ship) 😈🔥🥉

2. tie b/w TYLYN and AIDLYN (the wholesome ships) 😌👌🥈

1. BENLOR (THE PUREST SWEETEST MOST ADORABLE GOOFS EVERR I-) 🥺❤🥇

[etherealxwitch]

thoughts about deep-throating steve?

omg yes yes yes! (this isn’t proofread, so apologies for mistakes!)

warnings: oral (m receiving), slight sub!steve, pet names

—————

steve had always wanted you to deepthroat him, even ached for it, but he never pushed your limits. he was always sweet, only doing what you were comfortable with. no girls ever really could fit all of his cock in their mouths, not when he was as huge as he was.

tonight, you took him by surprise, though. you got on your knees in front of him and ran slow hands up and down his jean-clad thighs. the higher you went with your touches, the more his cock jumped in his pants.

“baby, what are you doing?” he looked down at you, and even though he was taken aback by the eagerness of your hands, he couldn’t deny how hot it was seeing you like this.

“me?” you popped the button of his jeans and slowly slid down the zipper far enough for you to reach your hand in. you ran your fingers along his half-hard cock and smirked to yourself when he let out a low groan. “i’m gonna do what you always wanted me to do.”

“wait, you don’t have t- oh fuuuuck.” steve threw his head back the second your warm hand reached below his boxers and wrap around his cock. “a-are you sure?”

you looked him in the eyes, biting your lip as you nodded. “i’m very sure.”

by the time you had pulled his jeans and boxers down, his cock was rock hard and slapped against his happy trail, smearing precum.

you didn’t want to waste anymore time. you grabbed the base of his cock and peppered kisses up and down it before letting your tongue lick at the leaking tip. steve’s hands immediately flew to your hair, digging his fingers to the roots to get a good grip.

“such pretty lips,” he looked down at you, his eyes already hooded from having your lips on him.

your lips wrapped around the tip of his cock, hollowing your cheeks as you sucked on it and swirled your tongue around it.

steve wanted to push his cock deeper in your mouth, you could tell by the buck of his hips.

“go ahead,” you pull away long enough to talk. “you can let go, baby.”

“i don’t want to hurt you.” he cupped your cheek.

you kissed his palm, letting your tongue stick out to lick his salty skin. “you won’t, i promise.”

before he knew it, your lips were wrapped back around his cock, looking up at him with full permission.

steve took your words and ran with him. his hands held your hands still as he bucked his hips up. the tip of his cock brushed the back of your throat, causing you to gag and your eyes to water.

“shit- again?” he looked down at you with pleading eyes, “please?”

you nodded as much as you could with his cock in tour mouth, morning around him as he throbbed against your tongue.

again, his hips thrusted, pushing his cock further into your throat. each time you gagged around steve’s cock, he groaned and tightened the hold on your head.

drool was dripping down your chin, makeup smeared across your face. steve looked down at you were hearts in his eyes, he’s never seen such a beautiful sight.

“that’s it, holy fuck.” steve’s eyes fluttered shut as you swallowed around him, your throat bobbing. “feels so goddamn good.”

you raked your nails down his hairy thighs, leaving red marks in their wake as you slowly bobbed your head up and down.

steve’s stomach muscles tightened as you took the rest of his cock in your mouth. your nose was now buried in the curly patch of hair at the base of his cock and his balls were wetly pressed against your chin.

“gonna cum in that pretty mouth,” he pulled your head back by your hair and took over, thrusting his cock in and out of your mouth. “be a good girl and take it all.”

[blacktabbygames]

Hi! I just finished Scarlet Hollow. First of all: holy shit!!! That was amazing and genuinely surprising, such excellent creative horror! Such a great sense of place, too, really rooted in the South without ever being patronizing about it. I can’t wait for chapter 5!

Second: Was one of you guys a former Big Law junior attorney? Because I was, and so of course I picked Book Smart, and then you absolutely fucking nailed the description of it. Even to the “free” (billed directly to the client) black car rides home if you stay late. Honestly, it kinda gave me flashbacks.

Anyway, great writing, a great game, just makes me want Autumn to come faster.

Ahahaha, one of us is a law school drop-out. I left in part because biglaw felt like one of the only options to pay off the exorbitant loans you need to take out to go to law school in the US and it sounded goddamn ~miserable~

[og-akiree]

Yandere Sir Pentious | General Headcanons

Since no one else is doing it, I will >:(

Ps. I take requests ;)

● He may not be the smartest or strongest, but he's got the spirit alright.

● In this scenario, you met him first at the Hotel. Maybe you were a sinner looking for redemption? Maybe you were Charlie's friend or in a leash? Or maybe you just were there for the free housing? Either way, this man fell in love with you on first sight, believe it or not.

● He walks in all sad and pitiful `redemption redemption' and you don't buy his lie and goddamn it he doesn't know why but the glare you are giving him gives him the chills. And not in a bad way mind you.

● Like you're just standing there glaring at him, and he just locks up when he sees your eyes on him. `Who is this?` `What's their name?` `WHY ARE THEY SO GODDAMN SEXY?!`

● Eventually (literally on the first day lmao) when Angel Dust discovers the "hidden" camera and you walk in, dropkick him and stand on his back with one leg to keep him down he almost moans right then and there. Like wtf why are you so good-looking while beating the shit outta him???

● You ain't even gotta be stronger than him. When you lay your hands on him (or literally any part of you), he just locks up and lets you throw him around.

● The Egg Boyz are gonna call you 'mom' 'mama' 'momma' or any possible alternate regardless of your gender (or lack of).

● Like the Egg Boyz just are too dumb to comprehend anything. In their eyes, the boss loves likes you, you care for the Egg Boyz (whether out of your own volition or not doesn't matter), and you keep their boss in line. To them, you're a mother because a mother's role is to care and keep the daddy in line, right? (Why Egg Boyz, why).

● Anyways, as a yandere, Sir Pentious is more capable of showing his feelings for you than in the show. Instead of saying, "Because I'm buying drinks for everyone," he goes "because you are my first ever friend" or something like that.

● Though he certainly isn't the strongest demon out there, he ain't the weakest either. If some random demon happens to be messing with you, they just might find themselves in a bit of a pickle when Sir Pentious pays them a visit <33

● "You better bow down trash. You're in the presence of a RULER." (He's talking about you, btw) he worships the ground you walk on. You can't do any wrong in his eyes (even though you are in Hell for a reason)

● You could literally blow up an orphanage, and he would go "Yeah well the orphanage was in their way."

● In the final battle, you had gotten hurt, and he couldn't stand it. In his eyes, someone so powerful and mighty (even though you may actually be weaker than him) couldn't be defeated by something as simple as a hit from the first man ever, right? Right?!

● There are two ways we can go from here.

● One is that Sir Pentious sacrifices himself for you. He sees how hurt you are and filled with rage and the thirst of revenge he gets a confidence boost and kisses you deeply, declaring his undying love for you in front of EVERYBODY.

• Then he powers up the machine, dies an embarrassing death and yada yada. Now in Heaven, he will literally fight tooth and nail to either get back down to you or to bring you up there with him.

● If it so happens that he can't remember anything, then he would feel deep longing for something or someone that he can't quite place. What is this painful feeling in his chest? Why does he feel like he is missing someone important?

● Alternatively, if it so happens that YOU end up dying in the final battle, then Holy Hell.

● Seeing your lifeless body fills him with pure heartbreak that he didn't know he was even capable of feeling.

● He would kill himself then and there. He doesn't care who he will leave behind as long as he gets to die, too, while holding your hand or hugging your body close to his. He can't live without you, even in Hell. To him, the only way to be loyal to you now that you are dead is to be dead with you.

● Even in death, you can't escape your diehard fan <3