#like fork and knife with pizza

[hugh-lauries-bald-spot]

hannibal being forced to eat fast food will never not be funny to me show me that man having an existential crisis over a quarter pounder

[spaceman-spaetzle]

do you think austria stuffs his face with a sweet he likes if he thinks no one is looking

[its-tortle]

Do you fold your pizza?

only when it is a super floppy italian pizza that has no structural integrity otherwise

[meatsound]

while im talking about food every day im so sad because nigerian food looks like the most delicious food on the planet but i have really bad texture issues with touching food 😔

[seveneyesoup]

guess who finally made that grilled cheese after weeks of seeing the formula

[glitched-lives]

Posh fucker. Eat Skyrim for the XBox 360 with your hands like the rest of us.

[rustyelias]

Hallo, complete disaster of a crossover for your consideration

BSJSJSJJSJS SOBS this is splendid!! 10/10 complete disaster!

“Going through it” damn big mood Owen! big mood!

[bengallemon]

I call it the australian deep dish pizza prototype

I am going to change the world

[jalopeura]

nice things about my youth group this week: one of the uh. people in charge? was very impressed by my drawings. being 'the one thats good at drawing' is bringing back a lot of like. weird childhood/youth nostalgia

less nice things about my youth group this week: they all probably think im some kind of germphobe bc i 1) always wear a mask and 2) said i prefer to eat food that needs utensils, instead of stuff you might eat with your bare hands

[sigh-the-kraken]

I’ll raise you a pizza in two parts.

Part 1: The Crust

Part 2: Everything else

[image description:

1. a photo captioned “Part 1: The Crust” of a golden pizza crust in a round 9′ cake tin in an oven with the door open; the crust is in several pieces stacked on top of each other haphazardly.

2. a cropped photo captioned “Part 2: Everything else” of all the toppings for the pizza in a second round 9′ cake tin cooling on the stove top; pepperoni, black olives, mushrooms, corn, and garlic float in a lumpy, pale orange-red sauce made of carrots and red bell peppers. The skins of the bell peppers were not blended enough and are visible in the sauce. The cheese melted so thoroughly into the sauce that it was no longer visible. /end ID]

just made the worst pizza ever

[keekssy]

i know dipping cookies in milk is like a perfectly acceptable thing but i always feel like a heathen when my fingers touch the milk and then i just have soggy fingers

[devilmen-collector]

The Kings' Table Manners

Ft. Satan, Mammon, Leviathan, Beelzebub, Lucifer, Belphegor

C/W: suggestive on Lucifer's part

Satan

To Satan, eating etiquette is not that important. He is flexible and can adapt to both formal and informal meal settings. Whether he uses hands or utensils depends on the settings and situations. Though he prefers informal settings where he can talk freely with his subordinates and MC during eating.

Mammon

Mammon prefers formal meal settings because he can showcase more wealth there but that doesn't mean he's adverse to informal meals. Mammon prefers to use utensils because it is kinda a hassle for him to use hands while wearing golden claws and rings.

Leviathan

How Levi dines screams ELEGANT!!!

Leviathan follows etiquette down to smallest details (like which fork must be used for what dishes, etc.) He considers eating with hands uncivilized. When he first saw MC eats with hands, he looks at them like they were some monkey. If the dishes served were fried chicken, hamburger or pizza, he would still eat them with fork and knife (although it is very unlikely he will ever be served with fast food).

Beelzebub

Beel is a wandering king so he usually has informal meals where he eats with hands. Definitely licks his hands for the remaining crumbs (and MC's hands too if they are on a date together).

Definitely annoys Levi with his eating habits.

Lucifer

The king of pride prefers to use utensils because of his nails. His fingers are only used to finger MC, or scratch them. He will only use hands if it's absolutely necessary.

Lucifer says grace both before and after the meal. He does not expect everyone to join him but he expects silence and respect and no touching the dishes before he finishes thanking God.

Belphegor

Belphegor can and will fall asleep during mealtime with his face falling on to the meal itself. His nobles, usually Beleth or Gusion, or MC have to help him finish the food.

[articskele]

EEEEEEEEHEHEHEHEHE >:D

*points at August* NOW LEMME TELL YOU ABOUT THIS GUY

August Halcyon Cecropia is a rugged survivor of the elements. He built everything from the ground up, creating an isolated town in the mountains. He fought and defeated a dragon (which we'll get to later). And he's actually a really effective and well-loved ruler.

The town has a huge emphasis on fire and cooking and the hearth. They hold huge feasts and make bonfires. The place is super welcoming to travelers, and they make a darn good stew.

And August's design reflects this; warm colors, a big ol fluffy cloak resembling moth wings, a warm smile, he just looks huggable! He's a Facebook dad who makes corny jokes and drinks root beer! He would read books to worms as a kid! I picture him awkwardly holding a torch up to some homemade creme brulee trying to toast the top of it-

But behind all that, something's a little off. He's actually a manipulative bastard and a cult leader, and he's poisoned quite a few people- But he's subtle about it. Ya don't realize something's wrong until you're in too deep. And that's where Daffodil (aka cat mum) and Artic come in.

Daffodil was August's wife, Artic's mom, and secretly a werecat with plant powers. Realizing that this is not a healthy environment, and wanting Artic to have a better future, she runs away with her daughter.

Timeskip to Artic as an adult. She's all but forgotten her childhood in the mountains due to her brain suppressing her own bad memories- But then, she meets someone who seems familiar, but she can't quite put a finger on it. He says he's her father, that he's wanted nothing more than to see his daughter after all these years. He's so proud of how much she's grown, and he invites her and her best friend Kat to a little town in the mountains for dinner.

Artic eventually gets her memories back and realizes just how shitty August is (also he was trying to assassinate Kat this whole time), and shit really starts hitting the fan-

A majestic, bright, angelic looking dragon descents from the cloudy skies like a star; a force of calamity that August drove off a long time ago, as seen by the scar over one of its eyes. Except Artic figures out that the dragon is herbivorous; it isn't actually the threat everyone thinks it is.

August and Artic are largely opposites. Fire and ice, one conquers while the other understands. So Artic manages to calm the dragon instead of fighting it, and everyone's eyes turn to their leader with suspicion.

August relies on other people for power, and he was able to achieve his position by taking advantage of everyone's desperation in this unforgiving landscape. After all, people are easier to manipulate when they're physically tired out. Something something moths attracted to an open flame.

But if no one's there to believe or follow him? He's just a pathetic old man. So when his people turn against him and he's cast out into the wilderness, the first thing he does is try to tame the wolves. But to no avail.

This is a free post to talk about whatever you want about your OC! Infodump about them or share an interesting fact!

[inkedinshadows]

Azriel headcanons

Since I'm working on too many fics and not finishing even one, here's a list of random headcanons I have about our favorite shadowsinger. Seriously, they're very random.

I have so many more, but I didn't want this to be too long lol. Let me know if I should write more of them.

If it weren't for his scars that make it impossible for him (it'd probably be really uncomfortable), Azriel would wear rings. And I mean a lot of them, on both hands. Very slutty of him if you ask me. This is how I imagine it to look like:

And necklaces as well. Like silver little chains and similar.

Azriel is 100% a cat person. I don't think I need to say more, we can all agree on this, right?

The shadowsinger can sing, we all know that. But my current obsession is him playing the piano. He probably learned while healing his hands when he was a child because it helped with coordination. He's really good at it, but he doesn't play in front of people. Only for you. (I wrote a fic about this: Play It For Me)

He has a very neat handwriting. Again, he had to practice a lot after his hands were burned to use them properly again. I picture something like this:

He's the kind of "monster" that eats pizza with a knife and fork instead of just cutting slices and using his hands (I'm Italian, I'm allowed to say this). He would also always stick to the same pizza, never changing the topping too much (relatable). He'd probably keep it simple, with mozzarella, black olives, and maybe anchovies if he feels extra.

Since we're talking food, if you are out on a date or just eating at a restaurant or whatever and you order something you end up not liking, he's swapping your dishes and giving you his. If you do like it but you also like his a lot, then he asks you if you want to share and eat half of each.

He's not a cocktail guy. Here as well, he likes to keep it simple: whiskey, brandy, wine if he's eating, and beer if he's hanging out with Cassian. If he does drink a cocktail, his go-to choices are Black Russian, gin and tonic, Old Fashioned, Manhattan, and Negroni (which might be an Italian cocktail, I'm not sure).

Oh, and he loves coffee. Black, no sugar, no cream. Mostly espresso, but also full mugs of it, especially in the morning.

Azriel loves turtleneck sweaters. Leather jackets are another favorite. When he's out, he mostly wears black or dark jeans, but at home? Sweatpants. Those infamous grey sweatpants we all love. Again, very slutty. He bought them without thinking too much about it, but once he saw your reaction to him wearing them, they became his favorite piece of clothing out of everything he had ever owned.

On the topic of clothing, we know he mostly wears black, but we also know he loves Winter Solstice. He could be easily convinced to wear one of those ugly Christmas sweaters, especially if you bat your eyelashes at him. He can never say no when you give him doe eyes. He'll complain about it, but he secretly loves it, even more so if you're wearing a matching one. The first three are nice and simple and cute, the other two if you want to embarrass him a little (but he still wouldn't say no):

Same goes for Halloween. Couple costumes? He's down. Would he admit he likes it? Probably not. Would he refuse to do it until you're begging him to, just so he can see your cute pout? Absolutely. And of course, he lets you do his make-up.

He smokes. Not much, just 2/3 cigarettes throughout the day, but it can be more if he's stressed or nervous. (Just imagine the hand in the first picture with a cigarette, it's just the perfect position already. I don't smoke and I can't even stand the smell, but I would honestly let Azriel blow the smoke in my face fr)

Taglist: @mrsjna @navyblue-eternity @paintedbyshadows @highladyandromeda @starswholistenanddreamsanswered @azrielsmate3 @mollygetssherlockcoffee @mirandasidefics @tinystarfishgalaxy @cynthiesjmxazrielslover @anarchiii @readinggeeklmao @andreperez11 @azrielslittleslut @lilah-asteria @aaahhh0127 @lorosette @azrielsrealmate

[dilemmaontwolegs]

Summer in the 305 || LS2 {2}

Pairing: Logan Sergeant x fem!reader Summary: Logan comes home to Miami (305) for the summer break and you become attached at the hip. Warnings: 18+ only, made, smut, fluff WC: 1.7k F1 Masterlist || One || Two || Three

Logan must have managed to get some sleep on the flight because he was already up when you woke at noon. Sooty barely lifted his head from where he lay panting in his favourite spot in the sun, too tired from his morning run. After stopping to pet his head you walked into the kitchen and found your boyfriend shirtless, his hair still damp from the shower he had taken. You wrapped your arms around his waist and closed your eyes again as you rested your head against his back and started to doze off again.

“Go back to bed, sweetheart,” he said softly. He placed the knife down after finishing the lemon slices for the sweet tea he was brewing and reached over to the sink, almost pulling you off balance with the stretch to wash the acid off his hands.

“I’m good here. You can carry on, you won’t even notice me.”

He chuckled as your yawn warmed his back and he dried his hands. “You’re lucky I already went for a run then,” he teased as he grabbed your thighs and jumped, pulling you up onto his back. “There, better?”

You wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck before resting your cheek on his head. “Much.”

“I wonder if this is how the teenage mutant ninja turtles felt carrying their home on their back,” he mused as he crossed the kitchen to put the carafe of tea into the fridge.

“You would be the one that likes pizza. Wait, did you eat dinner for breakfast?”

“Maybe…” He was quiet for a moment, but the shelf it had sat on in the fridge had clearly been emptied and you pouted at missing out. “But I did save you a plate in the microwave.”

You untangled yourself from him and slid down his back onto your feet as your stomach rumbled loudly. He caught your hand as you aimed for the microwave and he tilted his head, tapping his cheek until you gave him the kiss he was after. With a grin he turned his head at the last moment to catch it on his lips and you laughed at the sly move before indulging in another, deeper kiss.

“What’s the plan for today, babe?” you asked while the meal reheated.

He leaned back against the cupboards and crossed his ankles. “Did you have anything in mind?”

You dragged your eyes slowly up and down his body before sending him a suggestive wink. “Maybe…”

He bit his bottom lip as it started to curl up and said, “I’ll have to check my calendar, but I think I can fit something in.”

“But not right now,” you stated as the microwave dinged and you hit the button to open it, the mouthwatering scent and steam wafting out. “Carbone’s trumps everything.”

Logan reached past you with a tea towel before you could burn yourself and placed it on the marble island before kissing the top of your head. “Can’t argue with that, sweetheart.”

Logan watched patiently as you speared the food with your fork, following it to your parted lips before he reached out and thumbed a dash of sauce that lingered at the corner. “You are torturing me,” he groaned as you took your time with the meal, humming exaggerated sounds with each mouthful.

“Oh? Did you want some?” you asked innocently.

He pushed off from the kitchen side and spun the barstool around to face him as he stepped into the gap between your legs, forcing them wider as your head tipped back to meet his eyes. “I want something sweet, sugar.”

You could feel his want pressing against you as you pulled his face down to yours, meeting him halfway with a desperate kiss. If you hadn’t been so tired from the late pick up last night this wouldn’t be the first time reconnecting after his two and a half weeks away. All those nights spent without him came roaring back and you moaned as his kiss drifted down your neck and he sucked the delicate spot above your collarbone.

“Lo, take me back to bed.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Logan’s feet remembered the path through the house intimately, not needing to look where he was going when his vision could be completely consumed by you instead. He loved to just watch you, watch your reactions to the world around you, he could spend hours watching you sleep while he battled jet lag and whatever worries plagued his sleep. Watching you calmed him in a way nothing else ever would - it had been that way from the moment he saw you. 

“I love you,” he said quietly after laying you on the messy unmade bed, taking a moment to just remember how you looked right there. He inhaled deeply in awe as he saw the love reflected in your eyes and then he noticed your lips already swollen from his kiss and the air left his lungs. “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, Lo.”

His palms brushed the shirt up your thighs and you lifted your hips up so he could free you of the panties you wore before taking your shirt and casting it away as well. You wanted nothing more than to hook your leg around him and pull him closer but patience was one of Logan’s many virtues and he loved to worship your body before all else. Where Logan was all hard, toned muscles and strength, you were soft and supple, moulding to his hands as they roamed your body.

Your back arched to his touch and a soft moan graced his ears when he kissed his way across your stomach and up to your breasts. Your eyes fluttered shut as his warm tongue flicked your already peaked nipple before his lips sealed around it and sucked.

“Logan,” you whined, the sound high and needy as you reached for him, palming the erection that strained in his boxers. “I want to taste you too.”

He smiled at the sound and chuckled as he swiped a thumb over your lips. “Later, sweetheart. The second these touch me I’d be gone,” he admitted unabashedly.

You giggled at the honesty and let him take his time, this time at least. You had three weeks of having him home and you were going to drown yourself in him, but right now you would be patient - as difficult as the task was when his lips were set to ignite your blood on fire.

The room filled with the sound of your moans as you looked down your body and met his eyes, as pure and blue as Biscayne Bay. You could feel every and nothing all at once. Light danced around your eyes even when you closed them and still his fingers and tongue worked to keep the waves of pleasure rolling through you.

“P-please, oh, Logan,” you cried as your legs trembled around his head and he gave one last lick that sent a jolt through you.

“Hmm, taste so sweet, sugar,” he hummed as he licked his lips and kicked his boxers off. His dick spring free and slapped his navel before he wrapped his fist around it and took his place between your legs, a thick bead of precum already welling at the tip.

The first orgasm was still fluttering with aftershocks when he guided his cock to your entrance. You never felt anything more perfect than the moment where a little push was all that was needed, where the resistance broke and he thrust home where he belonged - filling you so completely that your bodies become one.

You couldn’t think, you could barely breathe. You could only feel him. He surrounded not just your body but your entire being, his natural scent that no body wash could beat, the taste of his skin you gently grazed with your teeth, the vision of losing himself in the moment, the sounds of his uneven breaths in your ear.

“Shit,” he groaned as his head collapsed to your shoulder and you felt his cock pulsing in your cunt. “Sorry, sweetheart.”

You giggled as you picked his head up to see his eyes set in an extremely relaxed face. “It has been a while, Lo,” you assured him with a smile. “I still love you.”

“And you felt so good.” He kissed your lips and made no move to leave as he started to slowly roll his hips. “Still feel so good.”

His release mixed with yours and escaped your body as he fought against the sensitivity he was feeling, basking in the slick warmth your body offered until he started to grow hard again. “This is how good you make me feel, sugar.”

You followed his line of sight to where your bodies joined and watched his long smooth strokes into you, feeling every inch as it disappeared. Your breath hitched as he retreated, leaving you empty as you saw his cock coated and shiny with come after each thrust. “Fuck,” you moaned as your head fell back to the pillow and your core tightened, the vision still playing in your mind as his thumb found your clit. He wasn’t going to come again until you did.

It was mid-afternoon by the time you re-emerged from the bedroom and Sooty seemed to have recovered from his run as he bounced around the living room excitedly. Logan grabbed the ball he dropped at his feet and opened the large glass doors into the backyard, tossing it out onto the grass for Soot to fetch. It was almost instantly dropped back at his feet, the dark tail wagging up a storm.

“You look like you need another run, boy. What do you say? Should we take mommy to the beach?”

You took the two glasses of sweet tea you had poured and gave one to Logan as Sooty barked his answer. “That sounds like a yes to me. Why don’t you see what the boys are up to? They were as desperate for you to come home as I was, Callum especially.”

Logan grinned at the news of his close knit friends and he had promised them a good catch up over the break. Pulling out his phone he fired off a quick message to the group chat and was quickly bombarded with replies and a plan was made. Pocketing the device, he pulled you into his arms and watched the palm trees and ocean move with the breeze.

“Good to be home?” you asked softly as he fell quiet with reflection.

“Better than good. There’s not a word to describe it. It’s exactly what I need right now.”

logansargeant

Liked by yourusername, williamsracing, clementnovalak and 37,273 others logansargeant: Home is where the heart is. Time to rest, recharge and re-emerge stronger. ↳ yourusername: whoever took those stunning photos has serious talent (it also helps that it is impossible to get a bad photo of you) ahem… username1: in y/n we trust, out there doing god’s work for the Williams girlies. view all comments

Click here for part three.

Taglist {1}: @moonvr @copper-boom @yunnie-f1 @ophcelia @lightsoutletsgo @alwaysclassyeagle @neiich @omgsuperstarg @starwarssavy23 @fdl305 @faeb1tch42069 @sweetestrose569 @pleasantducktimetravel @dr3lover @writerscurse @christianpulisic10 @alexisquinnlee-bc @purplephantomwolf @belennasif @ryiamarie @mickslover @tyna-19 @destourtereaux @sunf1ower16 @octaviareina @laneyspaulding19 @booknerd2004-blog @mimimarvelingmarvel @chonkybonky @jpg3 @bangtanxberm @ohthemisssery @eviethetheatrefreak @kimi240302 @andydrysdalerogers @formula1mount @storyteller-le @dakotali @daddyslittlevillain @elijahslover

[apt502-if]

I feel like Rainn eats pizza with a fork and knife...

LOL :P Now that you mention that I feel like Rainn wouldn't like pizza or "greasy" "messy" food