#like dawg i swear they make sense together i SWEAR
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sometimes your lifesource is that fictional character you have a crush on and that oc that vaguely is based off of you that you ship them with
#oc x canon#this is totally about that hetalia china x mexico ship i made up the other day#y'all dont get it they've hijacked my brain my gonna AUGHHH#hell i even have an actual SHIP NAME for them#its chixico#(dunno if that makes sense but i'm claiming it now ahaha)#like dawg i swear they make sense together i SWEAR#I'M NOT DELUSIONAL I PROMISE#YOUR HONOR THEY'RE IN LOVE I SWEAR ON MY GODDAMN GRAVE
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𝗦𝗛𝗘 𝗪𝗔𝗡𝗧𝗦 𝗔 𝗕𝗜𝗚 𝗗𝗢𝗚
pairing: the worst!logan howlett x younger generation!reader
warnings: Logan easing into the new world and generation, mention of Wade trying to get roommate!reader and Logan together, making a TikTok, sniffing, smut, etc.
note: “she don’t want no puppy! She wanna BIG dawg!”
———
Logan had thought living with Wade would be a bad idea. He belonged in his last universe with what he’s done. He brought himself down for years, mentally and physically, hoping the pain would stop. Thankfully, it finally had.
It’s been almost a year since Logan has lived with Wade and his younger roommate. The match seemed off when he first met her, but after the first hour, she knew why she and Wade were close friends.
The girl was in college, young, pretty, had a small job at the campus, and loved parties, and things that Wade did daily.
Logan had a small argument with y/n a couple of weeks ago after she gifted him an iPhone. She said he needed it to keep in touch with her and Wade. She also said he needed a bit of humor.
He had no idea what that meant until she made a TikTok for the man. The videos that came up on his page didn’t make sense to him, he he still laughed at them.
He had no idea what happened to himself, but sending memes to y/n every hour was a habit.
After sending y/n a TikTok video, he swiped and came across a sound that confused him.
The man in the video was lip-syncing a song as she showed his muscles. Logan gave a disgusting look at his phone, thinking the man looked ridiculous until he read the title.
“When she chose you because you’re height starts with a six and your weight starts with a two”
Logan sent the video to y/n, asking her what he meant by that. He didn’t know being a muscle-tall man was a trend.
“Logan, I’m in the room next to you, just come here!” Y/n shouted in her room, making him sigh loudly as he got off of the couch for the first time in what felt like days.
“I just wanted to know what he meant? Like is being big and tall a trend? Like, if that’s the case, then I’d be viral,” Logan used words that y/n and Wade ran him by.
“God, Logan — Do people your age question everything?” Y/n checked her phone and noticed what trend he sent her. She’s thought about this trend but with Logan in it. He fits it perfectly, but Wade would tease her if she’d ever brought it up.
“I’m just askin', Bub. Seemed stupid to me,” Logan shrugged his shoulders. “Because you haven’t tried it,” y/n defended her generation. “So, you’re into that stuff? God, y/n — Never knew you’d be one of those kids,”
“I do like it, and since you’re so boring, we’re gonna have you do it, so c’mere,” y/n stood up from her bed and placed her phone down on her desk after clicking the sound.
“Gotta take your shirt off for it,” y/n lied, but she knew he’d do it, even if he complained. “No fuckin’ way, bub,” Logan laughed as he turned around to go back to his sofa until she grabbed his arm softly.
“Please! You never do TikTok’s with me,” y/n fake cried, annoying him in an instant. “Ain’t takin’ my shirt off for no little girls online. I’d get, what’s it called? Canceled?” Logan said, making her laugh.
“Logan, you sound stupid as fuck. Take off the shirt — Unless you’re jealous they look better than you,” y/n shrugged her shoulders as she went back to her bed to sit down, acting like she didn’t care to get a reaction out of him.
“Bub, you know I look better than them, so stop the lyin,” Logan felt a bit upset at her words. Y/n ignored him for what felt like hours, so he sighed and gave up. “Swear to god, I’d Wade say some shit about this, I’ll kill him,”
Logan and y/n worked on the TikTok for an half hour, trying to get the right angle since he kept saying he didn’t look good enough.
Y/n never complained. Watching him walk through her door repeatedly, then editing the video in slow motion, made her stomach tingle.
At first, Logan felt uncomfortable. She could smell the young lady, but he didn’t want to say anything. He’d be a pervert if he did, so he kept quiet, thinking it would go away, but he knew her spot grew bigger.
“So, you think I’m a big dog?” Logan genuinely asked as y/n began to edit the TikTok video. “What makes you think that?” She asked; thinking she nailed her scared response, but Logan saw the quick stutter in her fingers as she typed on her phone.
“Just askin, bub,” Logan said before taking a small sniff. He was leaning on her doorway as she sat on her bed. He was so far., yet she smelt so close.
He cussed himself out in his head, upset that Wade had won this “you’ll like her eventually” argument. Logan swore she was too young, and even made her feel a bit bad.
He had thought y/n had moved on, maybe got over the thought of her having a chance with Wade’s new friend, but the smell she had, is making him go insane.
All she’s doing is making a TikTok. That’s it, but he can’t stop thinking about the spot she’s soaking in her panties. He felt nasty, but in a good way after a while. The lust was taking him over.
“You happy you’ve got your little video?” Logan asked as he kicked off of her dorm frame and walked towards her bed to sit next to her.
“Yes, finally,” she smiled at him before continuing her edit. Logan scanned the girl's body slowly, watching how spotty her breathing was, seeing goosebumps form on her arms, and watching her leg shake a bit.
“Is that so?” He asked as he placed his hand on her thigh. She’s always been a sweet bean to him, but he ignored it. He tried his best to prove Wade wrong, but she was hard to ignore, and Wade knew that. Wade knew y/n would bring something out in the grumpy old man.
“Mhm hm,” Y/n mumbled as she pushed the post on her phone. “Think it’ll get a lot of likes,” she looked to the side at Logan who was now closer than she thought.
“And why is that? I look good?” He asked her, eyes on her soft and pretty lips. “Uh, yeah — Think the viewers will like it,” she awkwardly smiled, feeling her heart raise.
“Think you liked it more than the viewers will,” Logan almost whispered. Y/n just noticed how his shirt was still off. Why was his shirt still off?
“Seen you repost that video, y/n. You’re not slick,” Logan spoke about the video he had sent her. “Think you were thinkin’ about me when you did it,” the man smirked.
“I- I was just reposting,” Y/n stuttered as his hand slowly cupped her chin. “Guess I’m not the big dog you’re lookin’ for them,” Logan faked sighing as he pulled his hand back.
Before he could turn around to get up, y/n grabbed his face and pulled him into a short but long kiss, hoping to get the best out of this one-time thing.
“Told you last you, you ain’t for me, baby,” Logan said, making y/n look down in embarrassment. “I know,” she said. “I lied — Was just goin’ through a little somethin,” Logan admitted before pulling her back into a kiss, this time rough.
Y/n gasped as he breathed into her mouth, sucking on her lips like he’d starved for days. “Lo,” y/n moaned low at the feeling of his pulling her into his rough kisses.
Logan decided to push Y/n down on her bed and lean over her, keeping their lips together. Y/n instantly wrapped her legs around the man, pulling him closer as he moved his hips, grinding on her to feel the pressure.
“Oh, fuck,” Logan groaned in between their kiss, feeling his cock leak already. “If I fuck you, Wade wins,” Logan pulled back from the girl, taking a look into her eyes. She thought the man would leave, get off of her and never speak to her again, until he assured her, he was staying.
“Fuck it — Can’t resist you anymore, baby,” Logan smashed his lips back onto the young lady's lips, kissing her roughly as he tugged on his jeans. All y/n had to do was pull up the gown she wore almost every day she was off of work when she was too lazy to dress up.
“Wait- We need a condom,” y/n leaned up, but Logan pushed her back down. “Oh, no we don’t. Your cunts leaking too much for me to not feel her,” Logan said. She was confused, not knowing how he knew she was wet until she thought to herself.
He’s a mutant. His only powers can’t be regeneration and speed.
“Fuck, I-“ y/n cut herself off, embarrassed at her pervy actions. He probably smells her all the time. “Caught red-handed,” Logan chuckled as he put his cock in hand.
“Always wet around the house. Teasin’ me and basically beggin’ for me every day. Wished I took you to my room when I first met you. Maybe by now, we’d have our little family,”
Logan pushed into the girl, giving her no time to think about what he had just said about a family.
She’s never thought of a family with Logan. It’s not he wasn’t father material, it’s the fact she’s only been thinking about him pleasing her, and pleasing her only.
“Fuck, that’s it,”
#logan howlett x fem!reader#logan howlett x you#logan howlett xmen#logan howlett x reader#logan howlet smut#logan howlett smut#logan howlett#dark!logan howlett#dom!logan howlett#james howlett x you#james howlett x reader#james howlett smut#james howlett#dark!james howlett#dom!james howlett#the worst logan x reader#wolverine x female reader#wolverin smut#wolverine x you#wolverine smut#wolverine xmen#wolverine x men#wolverine#dark!wolverine#dom!wolverine#hugh jackman x reader#hugh jackman x you#hugh jackman smut#hugh jackman#x men smut
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Jinhsi is glowing in the game..i for real thought it was a bug or something and then i open twitter and people be saying the same things..how can she looks so goddamn beautiful..Like she can go from all softie to a literal badass woman..i want her so bad.
Imagine we as her lover omg i can't. Jinhsi is a type of lover who caress your face in the morning and put our safety first GAHGH WANT HER SO BAD
☆ — DEMO TRACK: Jinhsi x Reader
☆ — TYPE: SFW
☆ — CONTENT WARNINGS: None :3
☆ — NOTES: I AM SO SORRY??? THIS WAS FROM FUCKING MAY OH MY GOD. I have another ask after that'll tie into this (more specifically, NSFW hcs for her 😊) saur yeah. Anyway GUYS LOOK A SFW DEMO....WOW I swear I'm multifaceted
☆ — PARTS: Part 1 (you are here), Part 2
She is like. Green flags all over idc idc I NEED HER man she's so sweet my baby 😩😩😩 I need her dawg just having this woman as your lover must be like. So nice as long as you accept that she's working with an extremely busy schedule
Even then though I DO think she'd make time for you. She's a very balanced girlie who's learnt how to balance between working and resting, preferrably with you :3
She makes a point to always ALWAYS wake up next to you. I'd say that she's an early riser as well so she probably just lays there on her side, brushing her hand on your face and your body as she waits for you to wake up. Could she just get up and carry on with work? Yes, and perhaps you've even offered that she could bc you KNOW being a magistrate means you're never NOT busy.. but she's always declined, saying that the first thing she wants to see in the morning isn't work but rather the joy on people's faces as a result of her hard work with keeping the peace.......and that is especially the case with seeing you alive and satisfied in her embrace 🥰🥰🥰🥰
The first thing you feel when you wake is a soft kiss on your bare shoulder, the contact warm and tender yet brief.. but then it comes back as quick as it went and you can't help but sigh in contentment as your eyes fluttered open.
The first thing you see is not Jinzhou's magistrate but rather a woman of pure elegance, her seemingly luminescent white hair flowing freely and expectedly unkept after a lovely night (and you could never tell if it was due to her connection with Jué or if it were a natural reflection of the light). Though to you, she was still nothing short of perfect, with the way the morning light had bathed her pale skin with such an ethereal glow.
"Good morning, dearest."
The first thing you hear is the sound of her soft voice, a groggy rasp to its undertone as a result of a good night's sleep with you.
"Mmm.. morning."
That was the only form of verbal exchange the two of you had for a while as you both laid on the bed without any intention of hastily diving back into the real world. You simply turned around to snuggle closer to your gentle lover, your limbs tangled together before you leaned in at the same time.
There it was, the first thing you taste and the first thing you smell being her, all five senses filled with nothing but her. And considering how busy her life is, you wouldn't have your mornings any other way.
You don't actually know how long you've spent there in silence, cradling each other and exchanging tender kisses without a need for words. You don't really care, and neither does your beloved girlfriend despite the responsibilities she has. But of course, you know better than to question her.
You could have stayed there until the end of time but alas, duty does call.. and so do your stomachs for a good meal.
The both of you sit up at the same time, as if attuned to each other, and give each other one more peck before parting.
"I can make something for breakfast," you offered, "though if you need to leave now, then that's fine too."
Jinhsi shook her head, "I have a counter-offer; let me do the cooking this time."
"You sure? You know you don't have to do that."
"Shh," she places a finger on your lips for a moment before dropping her hand, "I want to. You deserve to be treated every once in a while, so let me?"
"..You always convince me, even though it feels like you're wasting your time for me."
"I wouldn't, as you say, 'waste my time' in doing so if I didn't love you."
WIFE MATERIAL WIFE MATERIAL WIFE MATERIAL I LOVE YOU JINHSI
Throughout your day to day basis I feel like she likes to keep tabs on you to make sure you're okay. She isn't oppressive with it, doesn't have anyone directly guarding you and looming over you or stalking you at every direction, bc she knows you can handle yourself and function independently and she doesn't want you thinking she doesn't trust you!!! But she often asks people if they've seen you around and how you're faring. I think at some point, people end up doing it on their own bc they can tell (with much amusement, ESPECIALLY for Changli) how much she cares about you. Even Sanhua makes it a point to report to her if she sees you somewhere HAHAHA
Speaking of Sanhua, considering how you two are tied together then she's also technically your bodyguard by proxy 🫶 so expect to see her a lot. She'd have a soft spot for you as well, starting off bc you make Jinhsi happy but then over timr you'd probably bond anyway (and Jinhsi's cheery ab having her two precious people get along :3)
She also sends you gifts if she can't see you for the day or a certain period of time. A random courier delivers it to you personally with a knowing smile on their face and you're usually surprised with how it's either something you've wanted for a while now, something you thought about today as you passed by a certain store, or just something that she says in a note reminded her of you 🫠🫠🫠UGH I'M SO LONELY
Ofc being in a relationship with Jinzhou's magistrate also means suffering the downsides aka being basically the prime target for anything that may source as a way to get to Jinhsi with more.. hostile means. Doesn't necessarily happen much bc she takes safety SERIOUSLY but ofc it does happen. Not to mention in general as well, with all the tacet fields popping up left and right
She wants to be able to protect you 24/7 but she does know constant protection would suffocate anyone, with the way she's able to essentially assign the fiercest most intimidating people to basically surround you. But she does try, if not by having others to do so then by herself
Watching Jinhsi fight felt like nothing short of an ongoing art piece painted onto a canvas.
She was unfazed, unbothered and ever so graceful—her sword cuts through the Tacet Discords so cleanly as she executed each one without so much as breaking a sweat. Despite the chaotic conflict, however, it felt as if she were simply dancing through each Discord with their shrieks and screams as her very own orchestrated accompaniment.
..What a morbid thought, though your lover still seems to make it seem like a beautiful visage anyway.
The two of you had only wanted to venture beyond Jinzhou's city walls for a nice picnic, but of course the risk of encountering random dangers had caught up to you, hence the situation.
You knew you wouldn't have to wait for long though—and you say that with such jarring nonchalance because a situation like this is more than some random nuisance, except you have the Sentinel's blessed willingly protecting you—because Jinshi's making short work on the Discords like they're nothing. As expected, of course, though there was that valid twinge of fear mixing within your excitement and awe at her power and her fighting prowess.
A blink, and the final Discord falls to her sword, the metal of her blade echoing out a metallic, reasonating sound that announces the battle's finality. And with it, the Echoes of the last Discord she had felled is stood there, sparkling a glittering gold.
She looks back at you with a concentrated glare, the horns on her head and the aura surrounding her signifying the final fragments of her silent aggression, before she blinks out of her state and reverts back to the seemingly docile woman that you spend your days with.
The white-haired woman licked her lips before speaking, her gaze darting from you to the still Echo, "A see-through visage of you would make for a nice anniversary gift, no?"
You snorted, walking over to her now that the field's been cleared, "Are you implying that you'll kill me so that I end up like the Echo there?"
"Goodness, no! The Echo's presence simply sparked an idea within me." She laughs despite the fight she had just gone through, and the sound couldn't be more musical to your ears, "I simply want to immortalise your memory, perhaps with my presence as a cameo?"
"Even though you're arguably the more important public figure out of the two of us? Why not just have us together, on equal standing?"
"..Why, that possibility had slipped my mind. Perhaps I'm not thinking straight."
"Really?"
"Mhm."
"You must be winded, then... How about we find a spot to sit for our picnic, and then you can rest all you like? I did promise Sanhua that I'll have you back relaxed, unhurt and in one piece."
She raised an eyebrow mirthfully, "I still think she should have been more worried about you. I can take care of myself, as you've seen."
"Yeah, well-- ..wait, do you think she'd chew me out for having you fight for me?"
Jinhsi simply gives you a cheeky grin as she walks off, the playful expression a rare view on the Magistrate.. but extremely beautiful nonetheless. And you are left to chase after her, the both of you giggling as you stride through the now-peaceful plains.
And the whole thing has you thinking, that perhaps there is a more.. convenient way of immortalising your bond together, without a need for artificial Echoes or transparent tributes.
All you'd need is a ring.
And maybe better accompaniment instead of the screams of her enemies.
Idk how I ended up with a proposal teaser I'm ngl tk you what the fuck LMAOOO this is what happens when I don't plan anything. Contrary to popular belief I think marriage is a scam but this isn't about me 🫶
Dating Jinshi's obvs not gonna be sunshine and flowers with the risk and how busy she is bc she's leading an entire region, but surprisingly it's pretty close :3
#hazy demos!#THE BACKLOG IS INSANE#jinhsi x reader#wuwa jinhsi#wuthering waves x reader#wuthering waves imagines#wuwa x reader#wuwa imagines#wuwa women x reader#wuwa women imagines
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hey, don’t close your eyes
DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVE NOT SEEN SEASON 2
desc. when you are celebrating the pogues reuniting, rafe crashes the party with his gun
warnings. blood, angst, swearing
“WHOOO!”
JJ yelled as you shotgunned a beer inside the hot tub, having one hand up in the air from JJ holding it up in congratulations.
You threw the can away and yelled with your tongue out, everyone laughing amongst you. JJ hauled you up by your waist and held you there as you gripped onto his shoulders for more support. They all whooped and cheered.
The pogues were back baby.
In the next minute you were smoking a blunt Kie passed to you. Taking a hit as Pope rapped about school, “They say I come in the party and cause commotion, I’m smooth yeah, call me lotion.”
Everyone bursted into laughing fits as you clutched onto JJ’s arm and fell forwards giggling your ass off. He laughed alongside you and held you beside him as he bent his head down and kissed your shoulder blade. Him seeing you giddy and happy was always a gift to JJ.
You two had been dating for months now and they were the greatest months you could ask for. Even if you broke John B’s rule.
Time passed by before JJ and Pope were throwing punches at their shoulders sarcastically, each time they did you let out a small laugh.
“Go Pope!!” Kie cheered from beside you.
“Yeah JJ!” You grinned and held your arms up clapping.
JJ looked over to you and smiled with a wink, looking down and biting is lip before continuing his shenanigans. In seconds they were on the ground and wrestling. You whooped and hollered for JJ to win, but he lost to Pope.
“New technique!” John B laughed.
Pope nodded his head and grinned, standing he held his hand out for JJ to stand and waved goodbye as he headed off the beach. Shortly after, Kie stood and left to go and find him.
“Really?” Says Sarah as she subconsciously braids your hair.
“Oh yeah.”
“Way to be discreet!” Shouted JJ as they disappeared.
“I leave and this happens?” Asks John B as he looks between you and JJ accusingly. You smile and laugh as you look to JJ shrugging your shoulders and looking away jokingly.
“Are you blaming me?” JJ held his heart sarcastically.
“A little bit… oh, it’s beer time.” With that John B stood and left to get himself a drink.
Sarah and JJ continued to jokingly argue about pogue and pogue macking, disregarding you and JJ’s relationship. Soon after JJ stood and spoke with John B.
You looked down to your hands as Sarah hummed to herself before speaking, “Did you know me and John B got married?” You paused and turned to look up and her as she bit down her lip and grinned. “No fucking way.” Sarah nodded, “I mean not legally but…. yknow.” You smiled and sat back down, “That’s awesome Sarah, seriously.”
She laughed and said a thank you. The two deserved to be happy, they had both gone through so much together.
JJ and John B walk over again, the both of them wiping her eyes as if they had an emotional moment. You looked away and were about to make conversation before John B butt in, “Did you hear that?”
“What? Your chicken?” JJ thought out loud.
“I heard a car door.” He noted
JJ starts to cluck like a chicken and flap his arms as John B reaches over to cover his mouth with his hand to shut him up.
You sit up and look to the sound squeezing your eyes to look clearer, instantly you heard talking and stood. Shushing everyone you pointed to the tree as John B helped Sarah up. You started to climb right after her, JJ under you for support as you gained your footing.
“Go go go go” You ushered under your breath as you urged the boys to hurry, taking a seat on a branch quietly as you held onto the trunk. Shortly JJ emerged and took a seat on the branch in front of you.
Seconds later Rafe and Barry came, whispering words to each other as they crouched and held guns in their hands completely unaware that they were in the tree.
Your eyes welled up and you placed a hand over your mouth to stifle any sounds that crept up.
Barry stood and kicked the door open, holding his pistol up at gun point as he scanned the area for us. It was clear their objective was to kill us. Rafe stood by the bonfire, looking around. “Where the hell are you.” He yelled out.
Rafe paced around the fire mindlessly, picking his hands up and putting them on his neck.
JJ reached back and grabbed your knee, rubbing it to soothe your nerves in any way. Your gripped his hand tightly as your body shook.
Glass breaking made you jump as Barry stormed out of the house. “Anything?” Rafe asked, “No, there ain’t shit in there bro.” Barry answered angrily, “No? Nothing?” He yelled questionably, “No, nothing, Rafe.”
“They we’re obviously just here because of the smoke.” Noted Rafe. “Yeah, yeah, yeah great observation boy scout.” Barry taunted, “Well they’re not far yknow? They gotta be around here somewhere.”
It got quiet for a bit, tightening your hold on JJ’s hand before Rafe spoke again, “‘P4L’” He snorted and shook his head looking down, “Well shit.” He added “So your sister’s a pogue for life, huh, Rafe? Now who would’ve thought?” Barry taunted Rafe as he walked closer.
Rafe nodded his head rapidly as he squeezed his eyes shut and opened them again, “Shit!” Rafe yelled, “All right chill—“ Barry spoke.
You hear a gun shift off the safety and multiple gun shots ring through your ears as you feel a new hard pressure in your stomach. You could feel your heart beating in your ears, your breaths were uneven and short as time slowed.
“Chill! Chill chill chill your ass out, you’re gonna get us busted, dawg!” Barry’s shouts were hard to hear as all you could hear was your heart beating madly in your ears as time around you slowed.
“Let’s go Let’s go Let’s go…” Their voices faded as you blinked, looking down at your stomach. Your hand was clutching your body instinctively, slowly you forced your hand away and saw blood begin to bleed into your clothes.
You sucked in a deep breath as you swayed in your seat on the branch. “Y/n…… Y/n…… Hey! Hey, are you listening?” JJ’s voice would cut in as you looked up and found his eyes, instantly he caught on to your pale skin and ghostly eyes.
“Woah woah, hey, Y/n!” He grabbed your arm to stop you from falling backwards, “Let’s get down, cmon.” He eased you down as you never took your hand off from your stomach. He hopped down beside you and looked down to you.
“JJ..” Your voice croaked as your hand gripped as his shirt, your bloodied hands dirtying his clothes. “It hurts…” You muttered as you removed your hand from your side, the blood was much worse. It had expanded all around your shirt and blood was gushing from the it. Slowly you fall forwards as you felt your legs give out from under you.
JJ caught you and started to freak out himself, laying you on the ground as he shouted your name. John B and Sarah running over as they realized what was going on, quickly John B applied pressure to the wound as JJ gripped your face. “Stay with me!!” Yelled JJ as he began to cry. “Call an ambulance!” John B screamed to Sarah.
You’re sight was dizzy and beginning to darken. You found yourself looking at JJ, reaching your bloodied hand towards his face as you shakily wiped his tears as he continued to shout at you to stay awake.
“Please…. Fuck! Y/n stay with me!” He cried and gripped your cheeks tighter.
“I cant live anymore…. without you I have nothing!” JJ confessed through his never ending tears as John B remained silent, his own tears slipping from his eyes.
You managed a small smile and let tears fall down your cheeks. “I love you..” You coughed out blood as some remained on your lips, “P4L.” Whispering those words as your strength in your arm gave out and the hand on his cheek started to slip before he grabbed it and held it tightly, bringing it back to his cheek.
“No.. Y/n, look at me. Hey, don’t close your eyes, please.” He said quickly as your eyelids began to close. He shook your head in an attempt but they remained closed.
“…No… Fuck!” He sobbed out as he laid his head on your chest, his tears leaving stains.
The world around you stopped, your hearing stopped, your senses stopped, all there was left was nothing.
#jj obx#jj maybank#outer banks#jj x reader#obx s2#obx pogues#obx#jj mayback x reader#jj#jj angst#sad#i am crying#john b#john b routledge
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𝐬𝐞𝐰𝐞𝐫 𝐠𝐚𝐲𝐬
help ive fallen in love with the fanatics
this was originally gonna be an angst oneshot but now its fluffy and sweet and self-indulgent... forgive me angst anon, your angsty oneshot must wait.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
For once, the streets of Nexus City were quiet. Not the bad, menacing kind of quiet. The good kind. Papers rustled as a soft breeze pushed them across the street. Dandelions peeked out from between the cracks in the sidewalk. Hell, you could even spot pigeons trilling to each other as they tiptoed on the pavement! Nothing could ruin this day.
"Excuse me, floating one."
Ah. There it is.
You turned to face a very familiar gas mask, its green eyes sparkling with childish adoration. You sighed tiredly. These masked morons have been following you around for weeks, constantly saying things like "Might I request an audience with you, oh floating one?" It made you a bit... uncomfortable. But it wasn't too bad. Some were more demanding, and some days they came in pairs (often holding hands), but for the most part, they asked you, got sad when you said no, and left. It was ok.
The short man walked up closer to you, gently tapping the tip of his mask to your chest. "His buoyancy requests an audience with you, as soon as possible."
"His... who?" you took a step back and shook your head. "Nah, sorry dawg. I'm busy." Not wanting this interaction to break your day, you turned around and started walking away. You stopped after the sound of a manhole cover opening didn't happen. Looking over your shoulder, you spotted the little masked man nervously trailing behind. "Uh... bro? Not meaning to be rude but..." you paused, trying to choose your next words carefully. Jesus, he looks like he's gonna burst into tears! "Shouldn't... shouldn't you be somewhere else?"
He seemed to be caught off-guard, straightening his back instantly to appear more formal. "W-well, floating one, his buoyancy demanded that I not return without you." His gaze started to wander and he fidgeted with his fingers, his formal aura quickly melting away. "I apologize if this bothers you, floating one."
"Oh, my stars..." You placed your head in your hands, exasperated. "This was just gonna be a nice, quiet day where I didn't have to babysit any masked morons." You tiredly rubbed your face, only to gasp and flinch as you felt something cold touch your face.
The little man lept back, frightened. "Oh! I'm so sorry floating one! Please forgive me!"
You couldn't help but feel a twang of pity for the poor dude. He was practically shaking with fear, like a kitten in the rain. Goddamnit. I am gonna have to babysit today. You slowly walked over then crouched down to his level, meeting his terrified gaze. "Hey, buddy. It's fine! I really don't mind it." You gave a gentle smile for emphasis.
To your relief, he began to relax, his eyes returning to that adoring stare you'd come to know. "R-really?"
"Yes," you assured him. "I promise."
You could swear you sensed him light up under his mask.
Standing up, you offered out a hand for him to hold, which he took, looking honored.
"Hey. Do you wanna go to the bar? Maybe get a nice beer?"
He paused to think. "Um... we aren't... allowed to drink... any alcohol..." He muttered slowly, avoiding your gaze in an adorably embarrassed manner.
"Huh. Okay then." For a moment, the both of you walked in silence before an idea finally hit you. "Oh! I know!" you exclaimed, snapping your fingers. You regretted your outburst once you saw the man flinch. "Er- sorry," you apologized. "Are you allowed to eat meat? Gil's place is up the road, and they serve a wicked burger."
The short man lifted his head, seeming to consider your proposition. "Y-yes!" he decided after a bit. "I'd love to have a meal with you!"
You smiled at him and chuckled, amused at his childish way. "What's your name, by the way?"
He stopped dead in his tracks, letting your hand slip from his grasp. "U-um..." Once again, he seemed to shrink into himself, stuttering awkwardly and pressing his fingers together. "I don't think I have one..."
Oh, poor fella. He looked absolutely humiliated like he'd just offended a close friend. "Well, would you like a name?"
"Huh?" he looked up, surprised.
"Do you want a name? You can make one if you want!" you repeated, gentle as you could be. The little dude seems so shaken.
He cocked his head for a moment, thinking. "M-maybe..." He paused. "Hmmm... what about Rat?"
You looked at him with a bright smile. "Yeah, that's a wonderful name. Rat."
"T-thank you, floating one."
"You can call me (Y/N)."
#i love them#madcom#madcom x reader#madness combat#bro just imagine a gay couple climbs out of a sewer to ask you to join their cult. that must be such a surreal experience.#madness combat x reader#madness proj nexus#rat my beloved... he is just such a lad...
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Alpha Omega
Pairings: Colson x Reader
Warnings/Tags: alcohol, drunk, attempted rape (colson saves you before ANYTHING happens), potentially triggering dialogue about it the next morning, strangers to friends to lovers, smut, squirting 💦
A/N: Inspired by a weird dream I had and a real tweet I read, the person Jake in the fic was actually Jake Paul in my dream (ew). If you think the beginning backstory may trigger you and just want to read their friendship turn to lovers/smut, then scroll to the 2ND time skip marked with stars (***)
College mid-terms were finally over, which meant the same thing every year: the Alpha Omega annual fraternity party! It was the biggest party on campus every year, and even though it’s not really your scene, you decided to attend this year. Maybe it was the stress of mid-terms weighing extra heavy on your mind, but you needed an escape. But now, five full drinks and some shots later, you find yourself stumbling around the drink and keg area in the kitchen with a half-empty red solo cup, wondering how the hell you're supposed to find your way back to your dorm to sleep off what was obviously a very poor decision.
“Hey pretty thing,” you hear, suddenly feeling an arm slink around your waist.
“Do I know you?” you ask, disoriented and confused as your eyes try to focus on the face of the person touching you.
“The name’s Jake,” he shouts over the music, guiding you out of the kitchen and into the main party room. “You should come back to my room, you look like you need to lay down,” he says with ill-intent, but you’re too intoxicated to argue, letting him lead you up the stairs.
Even though most of your senses are impaired right now, you can’t mistake the distinct, pungent smell of weed wafting towards you as Jake escorts you down the hall once the two of you reach the top of the stairs.
“Yo, Jake!” a voice shouts from an open door, smoke billowing out as you pass.
“Hey Cols, what’s up?”
“Nothing much, man,” he says, blowing a smoke ring as he passes the blunt to his roommate Pete. “Wanna hit?”
“Maybe later, gotta get this pretty little thing back to room,” Jake answers.
“Aye, she alright? Colson questions, quickly rising to his feet.
“Yeah, pal she don’t look too good,” Pete coughs.
“Nah, man, that’s fucked up. She’s gooone!” Colson says getting a closer look at you. ‘You can’t talk her back to your room like this. That’s just wrong.”
“The fuck I can!” Jake retorts. “Look,” he says turning to you and lifting your slumped head. “You wanna go to my room with me don’t you, sexy?”
“N-nno” You slur, drunkenly shaking your head ‘Yes’
“See, she shook her ‘yes’,” Jake argues.
“Yeah, and her mouth said fuckin’ NO, Dawg!” Colson snaps back.
“Listen, I’m taking her to my room and there ain’t shit you can do about it!”
“The fuck there is!” Colson swings, his closed fist making contact with the side of Jake’s face, knocking him out cold.
***************************
The next thing you know you’re opening your eyes; an unfamiliar room and bed coming into view. You slowly sit up holding your throbbing head
“Hey, you’re awake,” says a soft voice to your right. Quickly, you turn your head in a panic to see a tall blonde sitting on the edge of the bed.
“W-who are you? Where.. Where am I?” you ask on the verge of tears.
“My name's Colson,” he reaches out for your hand. “I —”
“Don’t touch me!” You yell, scooting backwards pulling the covers up over you when you realize all you’re wearing is a thin, white, mens t-shirt. “Where are my clothes?”
“Aye, yo, it’s not like that. Relax, listen,” he stands with his hands up backing away from you. “I slept on the couch, I just wanted —”
“Where are my clothes!?” you demand.
“You threw up on them,” he answers.
“So lemme get this right … I threw up and you took off my clo —”
“NO! No! God no!” he says waving his arms. “My roommate Pete —”
“So your roommate Pete took off my clothes…?”
“NOOO! Please, just listen. I swear I was just trying to help you and keep you safe.” The desperation in his voice causes you to let down your guard a little. “I was saying, my roommate Pete. His girl. She stayed over last night and I asked her to help get you cleaned up and changed. I saw nothing I swear,” he puts his hands up again.
You sit there in silence, confused, trying to process everything he just said.
“You really don’t remember anything from last night? Do you?” He asks, stepping slowly back towards the bed.”
“No,” you shake your head, disappointed in yourself.
He cautiously begins to sit back down on the edge of the bed then pauses “Can I?”
You nod ‘yes’ and he takes a seat.
“Yo, you were in really rough shape last night. I’m assuming you had too much to drink?”
“Yeah,” you admit looking ashamed.
“Aye, we’ve all been there. I’m just glad you’re ok,” he smiles. “Me and my homie Pete were just up here smoking when we seen some dude we know trying to take you back to his room. I could tell you were wrecked. Fuck, you where barely conscious. I tried to tell him how wrong that was but he wouldn’t listen so I knocked him the fuck out. I didn’t know where your dorm was or if you came to the party with anyone and I wanted to make sure you had a safe place to sleep it off.”
“ Thank you. I’m sorry I jumped to conclusions,” you apologize.
“Nah I completely understand,” he accepts your apology. ‘That’s why I wanted to be here when you woke up, I figured you might be a little confused.”
“More than a little,” you let out a small laugh.
Colson cracks a smile, then heads to his dresser, pulling out a pair of his athletic shorts. “Here, tell you what,” he says, tossing the shorts on the bed. “ Imma head out there —” he points to the door. Let you get dressed and I’ll drive you back to your dorm. Cool?”
“Cool,” you answer with a thumbs up and a smile as he steps out the room, closing the door behind him.
*******************
“Seriously, thank you so much,” you say when he pulls up to your dorm.”What can I do for you? I feel like I can’t thank you enough.”
“Nothing. Any respectable man would have done the same thing,” he says.”I can only hope that one day if god forbid my daughter even finds herself in that position that someone would do the same for her.”
“Awww, you have a daughter?”
“Yeah,” he smiles like a proud father, lifting his backside from the drivers seat to pull out his wallet. “Her name’s Casie,” he says opening to her picture.
“She’s beautiful.”
“Thank you,” he says, then tucking his wallet back into his pocket. “She lives with her mom but I still see her all the time.”
“I’m glad. You seem like you’d be a great father.” you smile. “Thanks again,” you add, stepping out of the car.
“Hey, ummm, wait,” he calls out the car window as you walk towards your dorm.
“Yeah?” you turn back to face him.
“Ain’t you in that bitch Mrs. Pearson’s creative writing class with me?”
“Oh yeah,” you thought he looked familiar. “You usually sit up in the back row right?”
“If you mean ‘take a nap in the back row’, then yeah that’s me”, he laughs.
“Well see you bright and early tomorrow then I guess,” you smile.
“Yeah, see ya,” he smiles back before driving off.
**************************************
The two of you became quite close after that. Gradually moving your seats closer and closer to be near each other in class and pairing up for projects together. You even got to meet his daughter Casie briefly once before her mom picked her up from their weekend visit. You spent a lot of your free time together.It was amazing how you could do absolutely nothing when you were together yet there was no awkward silence or moments: much like right now where you're both hanging out in your dorm just laying on your bed scrolling aimlessly through your phones.
“Oh my god why are men so stupid?” You blurt out in laughter, showing him a tweet on your phone. “This dude really had the audacity to make a whole ass thread about how to eat pussy but he obviously has no clue what he’s talking about; girls don’t squirt out of their clits!’ No wonder girls never cum and have to fake it. Ya’ll mother fuckers don’t even know where the clit IS, and I’m pretty sure squirting is just something made up by the porn industry cuz that shit never happens in real life.”
“Aye, nah I hope you aint including me in that, cuz lemme tell you, ya boy knows where the clit is! My girls always cum,” he smirks.
“Yeah, okay,” you roll your eyes. “How do you know they’re not faking?”
“Cuz squirting ain’t made up, that shits VERY real! Maybe not every time but it has happened so I know they weren’t faking,” he smiles. “You mean to tell me a guy has never made you cum?
“Uhn uh” you shake your head no.
“And you’ve never squirt... even ..uhh..by yourself...or with whatever toys you chicks use?”
“I mean I’ve cum alone, but never squirt. No,” you admit blushing. You and Colson have never discussed anything sexual with each other before.
“That’s bananas, dawg!” he exclaims, slapping the bed.
The room grows quiet, the silence feeling awkward for the first time in your whole friendship.
“Aye, uh you trust me right?” Colson breaks the silence
“Yeah, of course, with my life!” you exclaim.”Why?”
“Trust me enough to uhmm...show you what I can do?”
“Are--are you saying you wanna — “
“I wanna make you cum,” he blurts out, cutting you off. “If- if you’ll let me that is.”
“I...Uhmm..I..”, you stumble while thinking it over.
“Sorry… uhhh let’s just forget this whole conversation, okay?” he says ashamed, thinking he made you uncomfortable.
“Why not,” you blurt out nonchalantly.
“Wait!, why not, like… like you … you wanna —”
You silently shake your head yes biting your lip.
“Oh shit! For real?” He says in surprise, getting up off the bed. “Uhh, c’mere,” he calls you over to the edge of the bed.
You do as you're told crawling over to the edge, sitting with your legs dangling off the bed. “You know, you don’t gotta go easy with me,” you smirk waiting for him to make his next move.
“Good, I wasn’t planning on it,” he says, immediately flipping you over and yanking your panties off from under your dress.
“Ugh you boys are all the same,” you groan looking back at him assuming he’s just gonna start fucking you from behind. “Haven’t any of you even heard of foreplay?”
“Don’t tell me no one’s ever eaten your pussy from the back before?” he questions, kneeling down behind you.
With both hands he grabs your ass making it jiggle for him before delving his tongue between your folds, his tongue exploring every crevice. You gasp at the sensation and feel his muffled laugh buzz against your core, intensifying your pleasure. Gripping your ass tighter, he alternates between plunging a firm, pointed tongue in and out of your wet slit and assaulting your clit with a series of rapid fire kitten licks. Your legs weaken with each lash of his tongue, your body slowly collapsing against the bed.
“Keep that ass up, girl,” he pauses briefly to say. You try with all your might but it’s no use; Colson has reduced your legs to a pile of jello. Roughly he tosses you onto your back, spreads your thighs open and gets back to work. Keeping his tongue focused on your clit, he slides two fingers deep inside of you, his lengthy digits perfectly pressing against your G spot. “I can feel this pussy tightening around my fingers, I know you're close, right?” He pauses to ask cockily.
All you can manage is to nod, ‘yes’, your bottom lip clenched tightly between your teeth as you look down locking eyes with colson; the fiery passion in them is a stark contrast to their ice blue hue.
Colson quickens the pace of his fingers, the sloshing of your wetness audible as he brings you closer to the edge. Then resting his free hand on your mound he gently pulls back the hood of your clit with his thumb exposing the most sensitive part sending your body into convulsions when he rapidly flicks his tongue against it.
“Colson, FUCK!!! ” you scream out in pleasure as the most intense orgasm of your life rips through you. “Oh my god... oh my god,” you chant in pleasure and shock as you realize you’re actually squirting. Colson doesn’t miss a beat continuing to work you through your high, relishing in the mess you're making all over his face and fingers. When you finally stop twitching he removes his fingers and sits up with a smug look. He pulls off his shirt, wipes his glistening face with it, then tosses it on the floor and hurriedly starts undoing his belt.
“You didn’t think I was just gonna stop at one, did you?” He says cockily pulling himself from his boxers. “Awhh, fuck yeah, sooo wet and tight,” he groans as he pushes in, then bringing his hand between your two bodies, and begins to rub your clit as he thrusts.
“Mhmmmhhmm,” you moan, the bundle of nerves still sensitive from your prior orgasm.
“Told ya I could make you feel good,” he teases, his breath ghosting over that one reactive spot on your neck just behind your ear, causing you to let out a little squeak. “You like that?” He laughs, nipping at the same spot while his hips roll in like the tide, crashing repeatedly against the shore of your pelvis. He nips and kisses along your jawline making his way to your mouth, harshly tugging your bottom lip with a groan. Your tongue reaches out, searching for him as he pulls back.
“Fucking tease,” you whimper.
“That desperate to taste yourself on me?” He chaffs.
To be honest you’re desperate for everything he’s giving you right now; you’re body has never felt such pleasure. So when he offers his mouth back to you, you happily welcome the tart taste of yourself still present on his ravenous tongue. Your mouths move in a hungry rhythm, following suit with your hips. Your breaths and moans echo each others, increasing in speed and volume as climax nears. He can tell you’re so so close and he knows just how to get you there. He grabs your legs pulling you flush against him and throws your legs over his shoulder, keeping your thighs pinned to his chest with both arms as continues to pound you.
“Mhmmm… Yeah, Yeah, Fuck me! Fuck me!” you whine needily clawing at the sheets as you enjoy his cock from a whole new angle, slamming into your g-spot at the perfect tempo. It’s just a few more thrusts until he has you completely undone, cumming for the second time today.
“Jesus Christ, Colson” you moan breathily as you ride it out.
‘Ughggg,” he grunts loudly, quickly pulling out, your legs falling to hips as he finishes on your stomach.
“Can’t believe you were out here talkin’ ‘bout men don’t know where the clit is and no man ever made you cum,” he says mockingly after he catches his breath. “Nah, girl, you just been fucking with some losers. Gotta get you a real man like me.”
“Well looks like I got myself one now,” you smirk. “ because we will definitely be doing that again!”
“Awhhh shiiiit,” he says loudly, his hand covering his smile. “ Got you addicted to this dick already, huh?” He teases.
“Shut up,Colson-,” you laugh, chucking a pillow at him “- and go get me something to clean off my stomach.”
#mkg#mkg smut#machine gun kelly#machine gun kelly smut#colson baker#colson baker smut#colson x reader#mgk x reader#machine gun kelly x reader#EST#XX#Pete Davidson#colson baker x reader#alpha omega#AU#mgk fanfic#machine gun Kelly fanfic#Colson baker reader
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I Love Matthew Fairchild aka Incoherent Thoughts about Chain of Iron (2021) by Cassandra Clare
I made one of these rant-rave reviews for SJM's book so check it out if you want, no pressure tho lmao.
Aight so I finished Chain of Iron last night and OMG I HAVE TO YELL like I loved it sooo much like yooo, I have a lot to say. I know the book is new so... beware for spoilers plebs.
Also context: I been reading the Shadowhunter books since I was 12 and I'm 19 now *insert dead emoji face* so yeah, I'm just so happy rn with where the Chronicles have come and the fact that they’re still ongoing *insert uwu face*. I remember when in like 2014-2015 or something when Cassandra Clare teased that Will and Tessa's kids' generation was gonna get a trilogy set in Edwardian London, loosely based on Great Expectations, and holy hell? I think that was perhaps one of the best days of my life considering how much I adore The Infernal Devices (that trilogy really changed the way I see YA literature... don't ask cus I won't shut up about it) (also yes I read TMI and loved it too but there's a “generation gap” between TMI and the other Shadowhunter books stylistically so don't ask me about that either cus I also won't shut up).
Anyway, shoo from here if you want a critical essay on Chain of Iron. I'm not providing that, this is just me raving here for the fun.
Listen... I want the bulk of this to just be two main things: The Matthew Situation, and then all the literary and judeo-christian meta aspects of it.
BUT I ALSO NEED TO TALK ABOUT EVERYTHING ELSE SO FRICK LET'S JUST START WITH THE OBVIOUS SHIT LIKE THE PLOT AND WHATEVER
Okay, the plot and writing and shit, let's get that out of the way:
The WHOLE Jack-the-Ripper-esque ambiance was just sooooo good man wow like I did not expect the book to take this cold turn but it worked so well. There was such a contrast between Jamie and Cordelia's warm little house and then the cold winter and the stabbings and shit and it felt like a nice little callback to the actual Ripper phenomenon that preceded them and a nod to the Whitechapel Fiend story from Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy.
Bitch OFC that whole thing with Wayland was a set-up like nawww that was too easy to spot and I get why Cordelia feels like shit about it.
Dawg Lucie was just the Among Us imposter here in that my girl was just venting and sneaking around with dead people and I was like nooooo girl run, don't deal with Fade this is a set-up THINK ABOUT JULES LUCIE THAT'S LIKE YO GREAT-GRANDSON *sobs* but yeah anyway my girl has death powers she gonna kill some bitches next book.
You see that confrontation between Lilith and Belial? MASTERPIECE DIALOGUE like this was the point within which I was just like "yo is this the book of Genesis or a YA Fantasy novel" like when Lilith said "I may have been cast out but I did not fall" like??????????????????? I YELLED she did not have to END Belial like that. What a bad bitch.
More on Lilith and Belial... "You, who brought nations into darkness? Shall I finally be able to tell the infernal realms you have gone mad, lost even the image of the Creator." HAHAHHAHAHA SHE SAID "YO BELIAL GO GET SOME THERAPY AND GET OFF MY ASS" LIKE??????
Ughhhh yasss Clare has improved writing diverse characters in this book compared to in The Dark Artifices in my opinion... I'm not gonna expand on it cus ain't nobody got time for that but like, I enjoyed how she wove Persian poetry and tales into the story and the way in which she writes Cordelia and Alistair. They're not caricatures of Persian people but rather multi-faceted beings who also happen to be Persian and I appreciate that. Also, Alistair and Thomas and Anna and Ariadne were just so fun and interesting to read as coupbles but also as individuals. She really higlighted diversity in a very natural manner. All I need is a hijabi character and I’ll die a happy woman lmao.
The level of META man like the references to Classics and art (I swear, she might have compared Matthew to angels out of Caravaggio AND Rosetti AND Boticelli paintings and I Am Living For It) and just all the quotes from holy books and shit omg I love it here like you really feel catapulted into the time period, she draws reference to external art and philosophy so well and I feel like she upped the notch on it in this book (didn’t know that was possible but it was the prose is BEAUTIFUL, archaic, but not pretentiously so). No, like the characters live in their OWN worlds of literature and art and history in the way we are living in THEIRS. They quote Wilde and Milton while we'll quote Clare. It's awesome.
This is an unusually structuralist take even from me but: I like the way the milieu social of the book, i.e., the high society Edwardian circles and their values, have a direct influence on the plot. James and Cordelia got married because society’s values essentially forced them to, not a demon. Cordelia abandons Jamie at the end of Iron because her shame as a woman in society and fear for her reputation made her, not a demon. Thomas and Alistair can't be together solely because of how Alistair tarnished the reputation of the Fairchilds and Lightwoods by using the horror of infidelity against them. Issues relating to marriage, gender roles, etc, stemming DIRECTLY from the time period rule the sequence of events to the same degree as the epic fantasy aspects (demons, Princes of Hell, the lore itself) do and I LOVE that dear God above.
OKAY THE GOOD SHIT LET US TALK ABOUT CHARACTERS AND SHIPS (N.B. but imma discuss Matthew and the Fairstairs situation separately below this portion):
Alistair's redemption arc: No, cus Alistair's redemption arc is honestly amazing. He really did change and it's not like his betterment as a person was linked to any one heroic deed but rather he simply decided he wanted to be better especially for his family and he decided to become a proper protective son, a caring brother, and an amiable friend. He fully owned up to his Malfoy tendencies and apologized without expecting forgiveness. He shows how he cares in the little ways and omg it's so sweet and tender. I really do want him to love himself now and be embraced by Matthew especially and the rest of the Thieves.
Dawg Lucie and Jesse are so funny to me like it's so hilarious how this girl fell in love with a whole ass ghost that no one else knows about like HHAHA. Are Lucie and Jesse my ult ship ever? Nah, but it's nothing to do with Clare, it's just that their relationship happened pretty quick and feels quite like something epicly romantic that Lucie herself would write. I just like slow burn and friends-to-lovers the most from Clare. To be honest part of me just wanted Lucie to not have a romantic arc all together but like, it's all good, I'm not complaining.
Okay Grace- like yooooooooooo I never hated her yunno. She has been abused and isolated all her life. It's not that she is a bad person, but rather that she does not know what being a person even entails. Can't even say she's a “doll” of a person cus she's never even been pampered like one by her family. I really started understanding her motivations since when they gave us her half-childhood with Jesse. I want better for her but cmon can she REALLY be saved???
GRACE X CHRISTOPHER *pretends to be shocked*... Okay, sometime in the middle of the Dark Artifices series some big brain put together a very thorough family tree of the families and like, it clearly showed that Grace and Christopher got married so like, lmfaooooo, I knew this was coming one way or another, but the journey to this ship is more important than the destination. Like in a way Christopher is such a cute baby lamb that it makes sense he'd end up being immune to her Grace-ness when he's just a cute little Einstein boiii. Like this is just so funny to me cus he's so oblivious to social conventions while she makes the milieu social her entire life so OFC it's gonna work. Like, this is such a worlds-colliding trope like just Give It To Me.
James and Grace - aw mannn Jamie just had me fricking wanting to hit a wall every two seconds cus like yooooooo every single time I think he and Cordelia are gonna stop being emotionally-constipated spouses, Jamie says some kinda shit like "omg me and Daisy are just friends uwu" like DO I NEED TO HIT YOU?????????? See I can't blame him for not slamming the door on Grace's face even tho he totes should- Jamie is so cerebral and kind that even if Grace wasn't using the enchantment on him, I think he would always be soft for her even if it isn't in a romantic way. There's just so much miscommunication cus like he said "Thank God" when she broke off the engagement with Charles and lowkey embraced her but it also wasn't his fault cus it wasn't even romantic BUT OFC IT LOOKED HORRIBLE TO CORDELIA like James literally never told the woman at least once that he loved her so OFC she thought she was back to square one with him dear God above what a mess. Not his fault, but she DID set down one rule for him: don’t cheat with Grace. And yeah even tho he hasn’t properly cheated, it must FEEL horrible to her cus she’s just been enduring the pain of their unrequeted love for so long :((
See imma just say it but if Cordelia thought that James didn't love Grace then she def would have confessed to him about her feelings right but like James, on the other hand, was delaying his own romantic confession cus he was BEING EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED and I can't even say the bracelet was solely to blame cus like my boi was just being so difficult omg I believe he should be lightly spanked by his three parents aka Will, Tessa and Jem *cries*.
Cordelia is such a MOM like she's so mature and stable and her self-preservation instinct? OFF THE CHARTS I love this woman like James definitely treated her well as a hubby but like I JUST WANTED HER TO HAVE CLOSURE ABOUT SOMETHING and boy oh boy she did get that closure she got it good but not from the person she expected in the LEAST *hehe* *pelican screeching*... like Lucie was being sus with the whole ghost business and James was being just, quite a case, dealing with Grace and Belial right and I don't blame them at all for their secrecy and shit but her FATHER DIED and her friends were hiding a lot from her so in a way she turned to Alistair for help but he could only do so much cus of his own pain (she couldn't even talk to her mom cus she's pregnant and she doesn't wanna stress her right) and then there was this emotional block between her and Jamie, Lucie was often absent and conspiring with the dead... the last person remaining was HIM (imma discuss this soon), but yeah my heart just went OUT to her cus she's tryna save herself and her family and she just doesn't know what to do. That's why I love the way her mom told her to stop holding herself back for others and live her own life. Like Cordelia grew on me so much cus in Gold she undoubtedly was a strange Elizabeth Bennet-wallflower hybrid and I... do not usually get attached to wallflowers but in Iron I feel like I finally understood that she was just tryna be unproblematic and self-preserving all along and nottt put her family and friends in a tough situation.... she reminds me of my mom personality-wise so yeah I’m totally rooting for her now that her *situation* in the past seems clearer.
Anna, Thomas and Matthew are such a SQUAD lmfaooooo like united in their gayness they'd be so unstoppable.
Will and Tessa are the most in-love of all the in-loves in this story and I respect that so much.
I lost a year to my life every time the romance between James and Cordelia got cockblocked. Like they were MARRIED and I thought they were gonna at least sleep next to each other at least once BUT NO James couldn't take a hint omg I'm actually gonna eat my fist and sob (but in retrospect, I think this serves a bigger purpose in terms of the narrative structure i.e. the interruption of all the spicy James and Cordelia action serves a bigger purpose which I think brings me to my next section, *exhale*)
Welcome to the Matthew Fairchild Enthusiast Club (this section is me talking out loud; it makes no sense):
bitch.
LISTEN TO ME LISTEN WELL I LOVE THIS BOY SO MUCH IMMA SCREAM I REALLY AM GONNA SCREAM MY FIST IS LITERALLY IN MY MOUTH *BACKFLIPS OFF THE ROOF WITH LANA DEL REY PLAYING*
Okay like where to BEGIN I think the Shadowhunter boy who I'm most attracted to is Julian while the one I love the most is Will but I think I see myself in Matthew the most. Like ever since that first story where the Thieves all met at the Academy then got expelled, I think that I just KNEW Matthew was destined to be epic. Plus the whole Wilde obsession? I’m no libertine myself but I just love his chaos and passion for life.
NO CUS HE'S SO WITTY AND SWEET AND EPIC AND YET SO SECRETIVE AND DEAR GOD ABOVE AHHHHH WILL HE SURPASS JULIAN FOR ME??? Ion even know but this is just sodjsgdwsdygyegydgef
Hear me out but I said after finishing Gold last March that I wanted this book to be Matthew's healing arc right so halfway into the book when I realized that we weren't getting all that good healing arcing I was confused just cus I thought it seemed natural to address all of his alcohol issues and sadness by now. LITTLE DID I KNOW CASSIE WAS SETTING UP A WHOLE OTHER ARC WITH HIM THAT I WOULD HAVE NEVER GUESSED WTH.
At first I thought Matthew didn't have feelings for anyone at all, and if he DID develop feelings unexpectedly, I fricking thought that maybe he's catching feelings for James, if anyone??? I mean, I did have some suspicions about Matthew from the get-go: like he's so secretive and as readers we think we know everything there is to know about him since we were all privy to the truth potion incident in his short story right BUT NO I GOT PLAYED AND I DESERVE IT SO BADDDDDD.
Listen I hadn't shipped him and Cordelia simply because I never thought it in the realm of possibility but it MAKES SENSE as a ship... think about it: he never says what he feels, he flirts with her like he does with EVERYONE, he is kind to her in the way he is with EVERYONE. Really, Matthew is shippable with everyone, doesn’t matter if they’re taken cus that’s just what his Matthewnes allows for ya feel. There is such a beautiful irony that CORDELIA herself did not see this coming. Even the little teasers and hints in Gold have only NOW started making sense to me likejhss. I just felt like the hints in book 1 did not indicate to me that Matthew really harbored real romantic feelings for Daisy. I thought he was upset that James and Cordelia were being fakes, not a developing CRUSH on the woman fgs.
Not to mention that you usually sense a ship building when the emotional connection or sexual tension between the characters is made clearer but to me their FRIENDSHIP grew right but it didn’t feel like Cordelia was thought that she liked him or he liked her so that means me and Cordelia are clowns *together* 😤
Okay I was lowkey having SUSPICIONS but I immediately shut them down right... like firstly when he took her to the White Horse in his car and she went OFF and OFF and off about how she felt free for the first time? I thought Cassie was just tryna develop Cordelia's self-liberation arc through Matthew there. Heck, I didn't even think ANYTHING of it when Matthew confession to Cordelia about the "truth potion" incident at all cus I was like they're FRIENDS??? BUT now it's adding up now...
See when they were at the inn place and he was telling her that she doesn't in the least seem like a 100 year-old married woman? I was like hmmmm he's so sweet but why did Cassie phrase it like that like??? When Cordelia later reiterated that she thought Matthew's flirting was “meaningless”?? I was like hmmm kinda SUS tho. And then when he and James had their fight over the way Jamie kissed Grace like again I thought he was just like? ion know? mad at James for it but I didn't think he was in LOVE with Cordelia??? So I immediately put aside my slight suspicions. The probability that he had a crush on James at that point seemed more likely to me.
BUT THEN it started hitting me that every time Matthew drank, even before he explained his issue with the truth potion, that Cordelia would note it, she would worry about him, she would think of her father which seemed so poetic to me, history repeating itself and all that but this time you can FIX it??? Yeah, but again I didn't think the L WORD would be involved man???
Now imma sound like a delulu shipper here but it just makes sense they would develop feelings logically- reason being that it definitely is possible based on the way Cassie set up the story, like there's a combination of little “friend things” that can turn this into a proper ship: Matthew rescues Cordelia in the ballroom when Grace captures James' attention in Gold. Cordelia sees her father in Matthew all the time but knows now she has a chance to be there for him in the way she couldn't have been there for Elias (classic “history repeats itself” trope, she doesn't want Matthew drinking in Paris like dhshghdfhdhch). Cordelia tastes freedom for the first time when driving with Matthew. Matthew caught James and Cordelia making out in the room and was pissed but not even HE properly knew why then??? Umm, when she thinks James is forreal cheating with Grace on her she subconsciously goes to Matthew??? I also found it funny just how every intimate marital moment between her and James got interrupted somehow. Like, it's as if the narrative is just a living force REFUSING to let James and Cordelia as a ship be consecrated. Heck, every time Matthew is scantily clothed Cordelia notes it. LITTLE CRUMBS I TELL YOU LITTLE CRUMBS.
I tell you when Cordelia showed up to Matthew's flat I thought they were gonna f*ck as friends but I got SOMETHING EVEN BETTER SOMEHOW
THEY ARE GOING TO PARIS LA BELLE EPOQUE PARIS THE PARIS OF DREAMS AND ART LIKE??? FRICKKKKK I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING AT ALLLL MAN? I deadass thought the story would be restrained to the UK but like it MAKES SENSE the trope subversion MAKES SENSE.
“In Paris, with you, I will not need to forget.” SHITTRGEGGGDG
BUT CORDELIA LOVES JAMES TOO LIKE I CAN'T DENY THAT... where are we GOING with this like Matthew wouldn't lie about his feelings and yet Cassie wouldn't give us Matthew and Cordelia crumbs to only end it in the next book immediately for her to just ditch him for James. I mean she was clearly holding back on fleshing out James and Cordelia as a ship for this but to WHAT END??? Daisy feels wild and free with Matthew and she feels warm at home warm with James. I can’t advocate for the sinking of ANY ship here.
Imma say what we're all thinking: Is she gonna give us a Will x Jem x Tessa type situation where Cordelia gets both of them cus I'm not strong enough for this but I also think it'd be really funny if James gets a surprise bi awakening in the next books and then we get POLY even tho this would never happen, it’s actually impossible, because of the whole parabatai thing.
Listen I ship Cordelia and Matthew much more than Cordelia and James, not that I dislike James in any way tho. It's just: Matthew is so unrestrained and she's so composed. They seem like an unlikely pair so it makes sense that they hit harder for me. James and Cordelia have such similar personalities but I ALSO don't ship James with Grace at all so like?? Poly would be... ideal... but it can’t happen especially cus they are fricking parabatai... a Will-Jem-Tessa situation seems more likely but mannnn ion know what to expect. I just want FAIRSTAIRS to have their moment in Paris. I mean James and Matthew clearly don't abhor each other for this.
Take everything I say with several grains of salt, take everything I say with the whole Dead Sea actually, cus I damn well know that Matthew is so flirty and whatnot that I’d have shipped him with anyone in their little circle but now that she set him up with Cordelia it all feels so right?? I have wanted this man in a good relationship since he walked onto the page in Nothing But Shadows so-
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I can't believe Cassia duped me like this omg, Matthew is gonna have his healing arc in Paris with Cordelia by his side like- THIS IS ALL I HAVE WANTED AND SO MUCH MORE. Question to yall btw: are you all as surpised at Fairstairs as me or did yall see it coming all along like smart people? Am I a lone clown? 🥺
BRUH okay criticisms of CC?:
Lmfao a part of me feels like I GOTTA say something bad about CC or the book but honestly I have no objective complaints about it as of now. Am I saying that it’s the PEAK of Young Adult literature and Urban Fantasy? I mean, I make no such claims tbh. I’m not here to be critical when I read as a hobby and when CC’s writing makes me happy regardless of how flawed some people see it.
Okay what next?
So like I’m excited for the adult high fantasy she’s releasing in the fall and whatever other works she might be releasing outside of Chain of Gold within the Chronicles.
As for TLH itself? Man I’m just VIBING like I suspect I will reread Chain of Iron soon and maybe one of the anthologies just because I am happy that this series actually happened after me waiting like 6 years for it when it was just a concept: a Dickensian retelling filled with poetry and culture and history and the conventions I so loved in TID at age 12. This is all I been wanting tbh. I’m just enjoying watching this series come to fruition for it to inspire and transform me in some way. I feel like in a way my coming-of-age aligns with that of these specific characters yet I ALSO feel like I raised Jamie since infancy. Wack.
MATTHEW AND CORDELIA IN FRANCE LA BELLE EPOQUE TO BE EXACT IMMA CRY I DID NOT SEE THIS COMING AND AHHHHHH. ALSO WILL AND JAMIE GOING TO CORNWALL TO GET LUCIE AND MAYBE BOND I LOVE WILL. HE WAS ONE OF MY DILF AWAKENINGS AT AGE 12 AND NOW HE’S HERE AGAIN IMMA CRY. I WANNA SEE MATTHEW GET HAPPY. AHHH.
Ending with a fun quote: “In the wise words of someone or other, there are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy, Maurice.” 😉
#the last hours#the shadowhuter chronicles#shadowhunters#will herondale#james herondale#cordelia carstairs#fairstairs#matthew fairchild#grace blackthorn#wessa#jessa#chain of iron spoilers#chain of gold#chain of iron#the infernal devices#ya books#books and literature#books#book lover#cassandra clare#cassie clare#tts fandom#book review#james x cordelia#chain of thorns#jordelia
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The Dragon and her Knight
a/n: before I start this. This will be my first time writing a short story that I thought of. So please help with feedback!as well! its very long! its been awhile since i wrote something like years so please bear with me! remember yall are loved!
Tenya x Female!reader
“We will be family day tomorrow remember tell all your family to come so we can all get to know each other.” Aizawa said
All the class groans
“Hey I'm just the messenger. Principle Nezu requested it for Class 1-A. So please bring your families. And I understand if some can’t make it. But please request they come. Okay class is over for today. Remember to call to see if they are coming and that it’s all day. Class dismiss”
Everyone started packing up when Shoji approached Y/N.
“Hey y/n you excited for tomorrow?”
“Honestly Sho I am. You will get to see my 3 older siblings and my parents again! They are always so busy with the agency we never see eachother.my father is even taking the day off.”
“That’s amazing! I would love to meet your parents again!”
You smile remembering how Shoji met your parents when you fell ill during Flu season and your family came and visited you while Shoji took care of you.
While walking towards the door someone bumped into you hard as you fell to the floor.
“Y/N?! Are you okay?” Shoji asked while helping you up
“Yeah Im fine sho now who the fuck bumped into me that hard ?”
“I must have not seen you there L/N. I figured because you're not up to my level?” Iida said.
“Guess who still hasn't learned how to fix that cursing problem you have L/N? Even as kids you used to curse like a sailor. You really have no manners do you?”
Smirking you said
“I may have a cursing problem Iida. But god knows I don’t have a stick up my ass now do I? And from what I hear you're just mad from your actions.”
“Now why would I be mad?”
“My family is all coming tomorrow and your precious rich daddy can’t take a day off of work now could he?” You say tauntingly
“For your information all my family is coming along tomorrow as well. Even my brother.”
“Ah the laid back Iida is coming too! Wow must be an accomplishment?! Here let me give you the pity award” You say sarcastically
Tenya growled and walked away while saying
“See your family tomorrow L/N. Tomorrow will be an interesting day.”
You rolled your eyes and walked to your dorm with Shoji.
“Tell me why again you and Tenya are always at each other’s throats about y’all’s family’s? “ Shoji says
“You see love. Me and Iida grew up together and were the best of friends. We did everything together from helping both of our older brothers with their suits to eating family dinners together. “ you say while arriving at your dorm and unlocking it
“Our older brothers were best of friends and so did my sister and brother got along with Iidas older brother. We were always neck in neck in school and Quirk power. Until one day my older brother Kyo (I’m just gonna name the siblings and if that’s your name I’m so sorry😭) was top of his class and was beating Iidas brother in both hero work and school wise. It was never more than a friendly rivalry between them but our families took it seriously. Iidas family found out that Kyo was excelling faster than Tensie. And surely enough my brother graduated top of his class and knowing how to control his quirk.”
Going into your dorm you set your backpack down and Shoji did the same. Starting to change into normal clothes while shoji did as well. It was so common for shoji left clothes because he always slept over.
While changing you continued
“So when graduation came along both of our families decided to have dinner with each other before having our own big parties separately. While eating dinner at Kyos and Tensies favorite restaurant our families started to compare our brother's work and every time they tried to one up each other until finally Iidas' family said “You know what? Our sons don’t need to hang out with your kind. We are better than you all and our Agency and money proves it. You don’t have enough money to raise 4 Children! Ha you guys are low lives we will never associate with again.” According to Kyo, Athena and Laxus
Tensie defended us and tried to apologize but it didn’t slide with my parents. We left and ever since we have been rivals. We were never the richest like them. We worked for our big agency. My father and Kyo run the Agency.
It has been a rivalry between us as well. That’s why I study for long hours and as well practice my Quirk with Kyo Athena and Laxus when they come around to visit or present. They all graduated top number one. I want to do that as well.
Iida is just a reminder from my past that tamiles like them exist. They are born into riches while we work for ours. I can never forgive his family for what they said to mine. You know how much I love them. My family is everything to me. We might have arguments and disagreements about my future and the agency but at the end of the day they are my headache to deal with and honestly I don’t mind.” You say smiling and looking at Shoji
“But you do remember that time you lost a dare and kissed Tenya that one night I thought for sure you were over this rivalry. I swear every time I bring it up-“
You cut him off by throwing a pillow at him
“STOPPPPPP WE DON'T TALK ABOUT IT! IT WAS A STUPID DARE IT MEANT NOTHING!!!”
He laughs and says
“SUREEEE you came back a squealing mess and so unsure of your feelings that night to my room.”
I sighed and looked at the grown
“You know I can’t love him. My family wouldn’t approve and you know they are my world.”
“But n/n you need to realize that it’s your future. And your love. You love him don’t you.”
Sadly nodding
“I do. But he hates me. He doesn’t see me as a potential lover. He sees me as a rival he needs to crush because his family says so. My family wanted me to have that mentality as well. But for the love of fuck we held hands growing up and he gave me flowers because he thought it would go pretty un my hair.”
You say while walking to a small box of memories and pulling up photos of Tenya and you as children and dried flowers you pressed.
“I’ll just love from afar Sho.”
He nods and pulls you into a warm hug.
“Remember bestie I’m here for you. Anytime anywhere and if I have to knock some sense into Iida when he’s mean to you. Even if I don’t like hitting my classmates I will do it for you.”
Hugging tighter you said
“Thank you really bestie thank you.”
“Now let’s get to studying. We need to review for next week's test. But we can listen to music and dance around as well.” You said smiling while pulling away from the hug
Shoji nods and grabs his work while you turn up the music.
——time skip to next day brought to you by my raging headache and wanting to eat as well my spelling errors———————-
“Hey y’all made it!” You said running towards your family
“Hell yeah we did we miss your stupid face!” Laxus said while hugging you
“Haha I miss your dumb face as well.”
You said while pulling away from the hug
“Hi mom hi dad “ you said smiling and hugging both
“Hi my love, how are you? Are you eating well? Not forcing yourself too much are you? And Shoji, where is he?” Mom said in a hurry
“Women, she will never understand you. Calm down, I'm sure they are fine. Right love?” Dad says
“Yes dad I am, don't worry mom I’m okay I’m healthy and breathing no I’m not giving myself too much and Shoji is just with his parents In his room before we meet up in class for the activities.” I say while looking over to see Athena and Kyo walking our way.
“Tell me again you sleep deprived child why are we here again? Family day was eject a thing back when we went to school” Kyo said while leaning into a hug
“Nice to see you too Kyo and I don’t know honestly. Guess to get closer. Dawg we've been through so much shit together as a class I think In principle eyes we need to like to know each other on a deep level I guess.” You say while pulling away
“Well beats me honestly it gives us time to relax with you and spend time with our small child we raised now come here and give your sister a hug.” Athena said while giving you a bone crushing hug
“Look at her now she was Bitching the whole way saying she was hungry and didn’t want to relive her U.A. memories. Now she’s hugging you.” Kyo said while wrapping his arm around Laxus.
We all laughed when we heard
“I see you still have a cursing problem L/N. You haven’t changed since U.A.” Tenie said
“Well you see Engine arms we love to keep it real with the family and no filter who do we need to please with our manners? Now you can just simply ignore our “vulgar language”now can you?” Kyo said tauntingly
There was a dead silent between them when Tensie said
“I’m just fucking with you Kyo. How you been, haven’t seen you in months brother.” Tensie said while hugging Kyo laughing.
“I’ve been good! traveling to America for hero work and Singapore. How are you?”
“Even since the accident I’ve been in my wheelchair but I’m still helloing the old man with work at the agency. Mister and Misses L/n hope you guys are well. “ Tensie said
My parents simply nodded there head with a straight face
“The Devil Dragon herself. How are controlling your powers going?” Tensie said to me
“I’ve gotten better. Athena has shown me ways to control them better and so has Laxus and Kyo at times.”
“Now that’s good! I say take better points from Athena. They don’t give her that name for nothing. Now do they?” Tensie says flirty to Athena like who simply rolled her eyes and said
“ in your dreams Iida” while smirking
“Ah so I’ll dream of it tonight.” Tensie said and laughed
Which left Athena a blushing mess
Before Tensie can talk again I hear
“Son, why did you wander off again?! We told you to meet us at the Classroom.” Mister Iida said while approaching us
“Yeah Tensie, we thought you got lost?” Tenya said as well
“I'm a fine father. I was just saying hello to Kyo and his family. And how could I get lost Tenya I came here to school. I can only go so far with my wheelchair.” Tensie said
Our family locked eyes and said
“Ah The L/N family I’m so surprised they let you children come to this school after your first son.” Mister Iida said
“Well I have you know Iida, my daughter and Son graduated top number one in their class as well. And our last daughter is not too far behind. I hear from Eraser that she’s number one in her class. And her Quirk is more lasting and controlling than anyone’s” my father said while stepping up
“You see Tenya isn’t too far behind and I’m positive he will beat your daughter. And her devil form.” Mister Iida said while giving me a side eye
I rolled my eyes and grabbed my dads hand
“Come on dad. Let’s go do the activities and see around.”
“Okay love let’s go.” He said not even saying nothing to the Iidas while I spoke up to Tenya
“Keep your father on a damn leash or i'll send him to a nursing home.” While bumping into him harshly
[time skip]
After a day of fun activities and hanging out with Shoji and his parents everyone decided to meet up in class to have the introduction part over with.
While everyone introduced their family my name came up.
“Y/n your turn “ Aizawa said
While dragging my parents and siblings up there I said
“Hey guys you know me Y/N I am the youngest of 4. There is my brother Kyo you may know as “The Fire Dragon” he is the oldest. Then there is Athena who y’all may know as “The Wind Dragon” who is second oldest. Then there is Laxus who you may know as “The Thunder dragon” and lastly me who happens to be “the devil dragon” us 4 beautiful babies came from our mother Lilac and our father Ivan. Together we all run Dragon Slayer Industry. Any questions?”
Someone spoke up and said
“Why does your name end with dragon?”
Kyo spoke up and said
“When we activate our Quirk our facial features slowly change into a dragon form. We saw that in the patterns of myself maturing into my Quirk along with everyone. You see, our cheek has scales at times when we use our quirk and Wings as well but only if we are fully using our powers. It differs for Y/N tho. Due to the fact her transformation is more lengthy and more levels towards her dragon form. She posses our strongest form of Dragon Slayer which is Devil power.”
I looked down and smiled when my dad speaks up
“She’s the youngest of our 4 children but we love her as much as we love our 3 eldest. They all happen to be our pride and Joy of Dragon Slayer industry.”
We all look up and dad and he gave us a soft smile
After everyone introduces their families and explains their quirks, Principle Nezu stands on Aizawas shoulder and speaks.
“All of the Families and students meet up in the common room of The dorm we are having karaoke night with the families!”
Me and Athena locked eyes and smiled
While Kyo and Laxus groaned and sat their heads on both mine and Athena's shoulders.
“Awwww what’s wrong Lawx? You don’t wanna perform?” I say while scratching his head
“No, because we don’t sing well, you and Thena always sing better than us.” He mumbled into my shoulder
“I mean that’s true but we know our old school songs don’t we Laxus?” Kyo said optimistically while wrapping his arms around Athena's neck
“You guys legit screamed Drivers License with me and Y/n when it came out. What makes y’all think y’all can’t sing?” Athena says while getting up and following the crowd to the common room.
“Did you really sign the driver's license with your sister Kyo?” Tensie said while his family behind him
“Hell yeah I did. It’s manly to scream with your sisters in the car about a breakup song. And I love them too much as well.” Kyo said proudly
“AWWWWWW you love us?!” Me and Athena gushed
“Shut up you guys” kyo says while pushing us
We both laughed and look at tensie
“What song are you planning to sing?” Athena asked
“Well hopefully a duet with my brother but if not if you want I can do a duet with you?” Tensie said
Athena blushed and mumbled
“Yeah sure.”
I smiled and quickly looked at Tenya who was just smiling at his brother and kept quite along with his parents.
“Are y’all planning to all sing together at least one song? “ Tensie ask us
“HELL YEAH WE ARE! “Laxus yelled happily
“We already have a song in mind. We relate to it too much so we might sing that one!”
We all nodded in agreement and arrived at the common room. It was big enough for the karaoke machine that was hooked to the t.v.
We all sat down Iidas family not far from us and Shoji's family right near us. Me and Shoji smiled and shared snacks while everyone performed.
So many performances went on From Sero and Ojiro performing
To me and my siblings
To Tensie and Tenya
Me and Shoji as well
And even Tensie and Athena
To even Bakugo surprisingly
Everything was coming to a end when Mina requested After her song finish
“I request Y/N and Iida do a song together to close it off!”
“WHAT?!” Tenya and I screamed
“Yes, that would be an amazing idea!!!” My sister stated
“We second that!” My brothers and Tensie said
All the class started agreeing and even there parents while I looked back at mine and Tenyas parents
“Love. It’s all up to you, we won't be mad at you if you do.” My mom stated
My father was about to say something when kyo covers his mouth
“Go sis. It’s okay. Right old man.” He said forcefully
I sighed and got up and said
“Well are we doing this or not engine legs?”
Tenya nodded and got up as well while we headed to the small stage and we looked at eachother and sighed.
“What song are we gonna do?” Tenya asked quietly
“Well I don’t know we can pick random-“ before I can finish the sentence Tensie and Athena walked up and said
“We already have a song in mind. Here this one” Tensie pointed to “Beauty and the Beast and before you say no one we won’t let you leave so do it good” Athena said smiling and walk off with Tensie
“Let’s get this over with Engine legs. I'm sleepy.” I say while pressing play
The music starts
I sing
Tale as old as time
True as it can be
Barely even friends
Then somebody bends
Unexpectedly
I look at Tenya and he smiled and turned to me
Just a little change
Small to say the least
Both a little scared
Neither one prepared
Both of us at the same while looking at each other
Beauty and the Beast
Ever just the same
Ever a surprise
Ever as before
And ever just as sure
As the sun will rise
Ever just the same
Tenya singed and looked into the crowd
And ever a surprise
Both while Turning to the crowd
Ever as before
While I sing sweetly
And ever just as sure
As the song goes on we became more emotional and more one with the song
Both looking into eachothers eyes and singed
Bitter-sweet and strange
Finding you can change
Learning you were wrong
We scooted closer together
While still singing Tenya puts his hand on my cheek which makes me melt Into his hands and forget anyone was watching. I felt that the world stopped while looking into his blue beautiful eyes.
Tale as old as time
Song as old as rhyme
Beauty and the Beast
Beauty and...
Beauty and the Beast
Singing the last note, Tenya pulled me into a kiss.
It wasn’t a dominant kiss, it was more of a passionate and tender kiss.
Happily kissing back we sadly pulled back for air and realized we were around people.
I turn to see my siblings clapping and jumping around and my mom's smiling face and my dad's soft stern look.
To Tensie clapping and hugging Athena and Iidas parents' shock.
Finally I pulled away from Tenyas grip when I felt being pulled off the stage by Tenya. Dragging me to an empty room.
“Wait Iida what are you doing? Dude let me go” I say while struggling to get out his grip when finally we stopped in an empty study room.
“I'm sorry I pulled you away. It was too much commotion for me to speak to you in private.” Tenya says while looking down
“Why did you kiss me?”
He stayed silent
“Tenya, why did you kiss me?” I say softly
He chuckles and says softly
“I haven’t heard you say my name in years. I forget how smoothly it came off your lips.”
Smiling sadly I grabbed his face and looked at him.
“Huh yeah it’s been awhile hasn’t it. But really why did you kiss me? I understand if it was in the moment and not meant-“
“Wait, you think I didn’t mean it?!” Tenya says with panic in his eyes
“Well with the rivalry and the mean comments and just brutal training against each other at times I would never think you would like me or even kiss me.”
“I understand where you're coming from but I need to assure you that I do care for you. Even after the stupid and inconsiderate comments my parents said years ago. I never stopped caring for you. This rivalry is so dumb. if I see Tensie falling in love with Athena. Why can't I do the same.” Tenya says
“Wait, you love me?”
“I always have. Since the day we met when Kyo and Tensie had a group project and you came over with Kyo to my house. I remember your beautiful c/e looking so afraid and didn’t want to leave Kyo’s lap because you only knew him. And while I tried to persuade you to come and play with me in the garden I remembered I overheard your mom say your favorite flower was f/f and lucky for us we had it in the garden. I begged my mother to cut the smallest flower there was.” He smiles and continues
“I grabbed the flower carefully and ran back to Tensei's room where you and Kyo were. I sat next to Kyo and I saw your eyes light up in the sight of the flower. I asked if I can put it in your hair and you nodded and I said-“
“It looks beautiful. If you come outside with me we can make a beautiful flower crown for a princess like you.” We say in sink
“You remembered” I say softly
“I always have.” Tenya said
“What do we do now? We both like each other and just want to be happy with each other. Without our parents at our throats.” I say
“Come.” Tenya says while holding my hand
We both ran to the common room and saw nobody and I looked to see that both of our family’s were in my dorm room. I tugged Tenya and pointed to my family. He quickly dragged me with him and while we approached our families we heard our fathers argue.
“If your daughter hadn't come to this school Tenya would be number one!”
“Oh please that is so not true and you know that. Your son wouldn’t be number one even if my own daughter wasn’t here. She got so many recommendations to come here like Endeavor's child!”
While they argued I see our mothers knock on my door
“Y/n sweetie please open the door. We know you're in there with Tenya.” My mom says
“Y/n its okay me and your mother are not mad. Tenya please convince Y/n to open the door.” Tenyas mom said
I see on the floor crouching down my brothers and sister along with Tensie who seemed to be calling our phones. And I remember I left my phone on my bed.
“Mom, I'm right here.” I say
I see my family look at me and Tenya holding hands.
“Oh thank god. We thought you locked yourself in your room.” Athena said while getting up and hugging me
“Oh no I just left my phone on my bed. I just talked to Tenya for a bit and we want to talk to y’all actually.” I say while looking at my family and his.
“And before we go into my room. Please stop the fucking arguing this rivalry is gettin old. Of who’s better or not. Both of you men are reaching an old age, stop arguing and act normal. I will not tolerate it in my room. If y’all do I will spray you with my spray bottle that has water. Got it?” I say while unlocking my door
They nod and all pile into my room.
My siblings sat on my bed with Tensie next to them.
My parents and Tenyas parents sat on the couch I had.
After everyone settled in Tenya spoke
“I understand that this rivalry has affected me and y/n in many ways you wouldn’t understand. From me and Tensie losing our best friends to hating the idea of them succeeding. Tensie matured and became friends again with the y/n family and hell even fell in love with Athena. I always respect you father because you always knew better for me but this is my time to choose and I choose to be friends and more with Y/n.”
“I understand dad that you don’t like me associating with the family who made fun of us because of our wealth and status. And god knows I'm still upset but it was never Tenyas nor Tensei's words. Even misses Idas words. And I know it gives you rage and anger seeing with the son of the man who made fun of us. But dad. Im old enough to choose who to associate with. I know mom is okay with it. But I want you to be okay with this as well. I'm not asking you to forgive them this instant. But please work with Tenya and Tensie they are trying to make amends.” I say with tears in my eyes
“Father. I love her.”
‘Dad I love him.”
We say together
Our father look at us and each other and sighed
“Darling I will try for you.” My dad says
“ I will as well.” Tenyas father said
I smiled and ran to hug my parents.
“Thank you really thank you” I say crying
My parents hugged me back and kissed my forehead
My sister pulled me from my parents grasp and threw me to my brothers who hugged me
“Look at this little devil dragon growing up it was just like yesterday you told us to shut the fuck up.” Laxus said
“If you dont let me breathe ill make sure you don’t have children you fucking dick” I say struggling to breath
When they let me go I see Tensie and Athena hold hands having there cute couple moment
I smiled and walk over to my record player and put the disc vinyl of Cage the elephant and
“Cigarettes Daydreams” played
I look to see my father dance with my mom
As well with Tenyas parents
With our siblings singing
Distracted in the moment i hear
“Can I have this dance” Tenya says
I smiled and slowly danced with him
“ We will make this work. I promise.” Tenya says
“We better. I know I didn’t kiss you as a dare for nothing.” I say while looking up at him
“I remember that kiss. You ran off to Shoji's room while I stood shocked and eventually went back to my dorm and overthink the kiss.”
We both laughed and that’s when I sing
“Soft speak”
“with a mean streak” Tenya singed
“Nearly brought me to my knees” we said softly as we danced to the rest of the song
Do do do do do do You can drive all night Looking for answers in the pouring rain You wanna find peace of mind Looking for the answer If we could find a reason, a reason to change Looking for the answer If you could find a reason, a reason to stay Standing in the pouring rain
#tenya iida x reader#tenya iida angst#mha tenya#iida x reader#iida x y/n#iida fluff#mha x reader#friends to enemies to lovers#shit writing#spelling errors#very long story
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hypmic: thoughts
as of 25/3/2020 (i have not updated this since then but my feelings are roughly still the same)
might as well get this out of the way since matenrou’s album is out. half to prepare for the 2nd drb, half to organize my thoughts from 1.5 years in the making
that said, i talk about everything that comes to mind so this is just gonna be a dump of random thoughts :>
no it’s really long
aight so
the main part of hypmic is the music, which is pretty good, all things considering. each division has their own style of music, and each character, their style of rapping. this makes for some really fun and sick combos during the rap battles
i’m really floored by the seiyuus, they’re really trying hard and doing a great job
it’s also really nice that they bring in different composers? and no two songs sound too much alike or similar? it’s just a lot of effort put into the music and i’m all for it
hoodstar is my fav all-stars song. it’s so funky and fun? i could listen to it forever
ngl survival of the illest is a close second. i was not expecting to like it so much
plot… exists. that’s really all i can say about it-
listen. i’ll give them A for effort. i appreciate what they’re trying to do, continuing a linear storyline through the drama tracks and revealing bits of backstory in the manga. TDD era was lit af and the whole chuuoku endgoal + all the character interactions and revelations is pretty interesting
it’s just… predictable? like, very predictable? so much that it gets boring and old really quick? at least throw us a curveball, kr
there’s also the issue about how canon stuff are in exclusive (limited) drama tracks that can be difficult to get but that’s just Marketing so whatever, let’s move on
maybe they’ll drop some extra lore in the arb game, we’ll see
oh right, alternate rap battle
pretty cool game i guess? i was really only interested to try out the rhythm game, which i did, and it kinda... sucks. or well, it’s not bad but it’s not a contender against games like cytus, lanota, voez, etc. the beatmap’s a bit off and weird? i’ll just SS each song before i quit ahaha
but if you’re interested in more hypmic boys.png & a more casual rhythm game then go for it
here’s a (kind of) hot take: there’s so much content released that it all feels. saturated
i do love and appreciate the new content! but it’s just... a lot
i mean, you got new albums, manga, hypmic radio, stage plays, the arb game, the anime that’s supposedly out this year- and all of this within the span of about a year? it kinda feels like they’re riding on the popularity to just. try everything
good for them though, more Marketing strategies
mad respect to anyone who managed to stay sane for the past 6 months
i mean it’s not necessary to keep up with everything but with how active the fandom is, it can feel pressuring. especially when everyone’s screaming or yelling about angst or whatever
on that note, hot take #2: the fandom is intense. but not so much in a bad bad? it really depends which circle you step into and most of the ones i’ve seen have people that are super kind and lovely!
but it’s mainly intense and loud, it’s a slight tinge of entitlement going around in some circles, most if not all are very vocal about crying and everyone’s just screaming
but hey, the amount (and quality) of fanart and translation content etc is amazing & i always give my appreciation and love to them
with that stuff out of the way, hmm i’ll just ramble about something
like divisions
buster bros!!! is cute. good bro vibes. it’s also really lovely to read about how jiro and saburo didn’t like ichiro in the beginning, and now they’re willing to do anything for him? good stuff. they also have really good songs and i have equal love for all of them, but ‘ore ga ichiro’ remains forever undefeated with ‘requiem’ right behind. saburo’s probably my fav bc i can’t say no to smartass lil shits :’D
i will give my everything to mad trigger crew. the angry yakuza sison, the megane cop in leather and the military dork who loves to cook can have my soul right now. they fit my ideal types so well :’D not a big fan of their songs except ‘dead pools’ but i love listening to them on the drama tracks
hard to describe into words how i feel about fling posse. i love them very much, their character tropes are up my alley (i have a soft spot for gremlins, liars and gamblers) and nothing can ever top stella. but it’s kinda difficult to root for them? kinda? they’re the mystery division, you know? tied together with secrets and hidden pasts. even when i first got into hypmic, i wondered how they even got together lol. they do have cute moments though! and i’m eagerly waiting for them to open up to each other.
...ramuda ;;;;;
matenrou was my first. i got into hypmic bc of division battle anthem and the group with a gray wolf as their insignia. despite everything, they’re so… chill. jakurai has such a calming voice, doppo and hifumi yelling in the background of songs is so iconic, and they just want to have a good time. being giddy over assassin jakurai is just a perk, i swear-
dotsuitare hompo has nice songs. osaka dreamin’ night was catchy and tragic transistor was buckets of fun. but as a group, i don’t really… feel anything for them. they give me vibes of a plot device to progress the story along (sasara for samatoki, rei for BB/chuuoku) and there’s not much for me to get attached to. maybe in time! roshio having stage fright is really endearing, and sasara has the prettiest fanart ngl
i love bad ass temple!! if i wasn’t already into hypmic, this is the division that would make me dive in. i love love funky sounds, i’m really into their solos, and their dynamic? the “tired exasperated uncle taking care of two brats” vibes? kukou’s fangs? jyushi’s extra-ness? hitoya’s weird outfit? their entire drama track?? amanda?? i just love them
these next ones probably doesn’t count lol but i’ll say it anyway: i love the dirty dawg. ‘TDD legend’ remains to be one of my my go-to comfort songs. the drama between the four is both funny and sad, though it makes sense why they split up. at least they have their own groups now
not really into mad comic dialogue but i think they’re neat! they have nice fanart too
everyone hates chuuoku for ruining lives and that’s valid but. i want to know more about them? they’re obviously the Big Bad but seeing things from their perspective would be really interesting. and i’m genuinely curious about how chuuoku works: the inner workings of the district, how they handle giving out permits, the standard of living beyond the wall & for the women who chose not to, the clone factory
putting aside the music and plot, hypmic has the weirdest merch?? in what other fandom can you get a hypmic-themed bathtub, toothbrush, underwear, face masks and hotel rooms?
✧:・゚*~ only in hypmic ~*:・゚✧
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Will the Bell Ring? Pt. 6
[Erik Killmonger x Black!OC]
Word Count: 6.7K
A/N: I am now inspired to write again because a tweet said that Disney+ had hella issues on the date it dropped and 10 million people still stuck around to watch it. I’m taking that same energy with me.
“Mara, I won’t ask you again.” Erik says sternly. Kimara looks around casually, glad that they are at least located in a public place...though he still doesn’t seem to care.
“MARA!” Erik barks.
“Don’t cause a scene! Damn, you have absolutely no common sense!” She hisses as an elderly white couple looks away and walks faster down the path. A breeze starts to pick up in the air, causing the treetops to dance in the distance.
“Really? All I got is common sense when I hear you tryna pull a fast one on me. And to bring someone I respect in on this, that’s fuckin low!”
Kimara adjusts her seating on the bench as the metal digs into you thigh meat. “Respect?? Oh please, you were just knocking him on some petty shit last week! And I didn’t mean to! Ok? I’m sorry!”
“For what? I need specifics, lay out the entire situation for all the other nosy white folks walkin round the park today. They wanna see someone act a fool, I’ll give it to them if you keep pussy footin around.” Erik leans back on the bench, spreading his chest wide with pride as he stares her down. She can’t stand him.
Kimara lets out a sigh, laying one hand on his inner thigh for extra focus. “I am sorry...for putting you through so much pain and agony. I know how much the relationship means to and I shouldn’t have put it in danger by getting myself involved without talking to you first. And even then, I should’ve known better. I couldn’t even enjoy it without thinking about you and what you would think. So...never again. I promise.”
Erik scratches his chin, bouncing his leg before dipping his head down to look at Kimara over his fake gold rimmed eyeglasses with matronly contempt. “Long as you learnt never to watch Euphoria without me, we good.”
Kimara squeezes his leg, letting out a huge sigh of relief. “Thank God. You really bout to cut me over Fez and Rue huh?”
Erik sits up, clapping his hands together. “They are the true OTP if I ever seen one. They ain’t even gotta be intimate or whatever, just the fact that someone been through her journey and is now doing everything to help clean her up while the forces of small white town bullshit enable her is...poetry dawg.” Erik leans back shaking his head in awe.
“Babe, you are sappier than a maple tree in the summertime.” Kimara shakes her head, the loveliness of their conversation filling her head like a delicious fog she didn’t want to ever see the end of, but Erik’s lunch break was almost up.
Erik kisses her softly, making Kimara wipe the transfer of her gloss off his lips.
“Uh uh! Don’t worry bout all that baby. If that shit makes your lips as good as I like, I could use some too.”
“You so stupid!” Kimara cackles as they both get off their bench and walk side by side: his hand on her hip, her arms locked around his waist with one ear to his chest.
“This was nice.” Erik says distantly, more to himself than to her.
Kimara cranes her face toward his. “Yeah?”
He nods. “Yeah, just to not think about any of the bullshit we’ve had to deal with, enjoy God’s creations out here in the gentrified park. I feel like a damn retiree with stock and bonds and 401K real fat.”
Kimara settles in step with him again. “But you have all those things…”
“But I ain’t retired! White America don’t want a nigga to retire. Swear everything would go belly up if Black folks could live off of the fruits meant for them. They’d burn the whole damn thing down before that would happen.”
Kimara rubs his back to settle him. “Peaceful thoughts, remember?”
Erik’s chest expands and caves. “Aight. But real life is literally around the corner, so as much as I would like to have you in my office, I got shit to take care of.” Erik takes her chin and lifts her face up to his. “My Mara, My Mara…”
“...I’ll never be farther.” Kimara says with only slight embarrassment beause their little saying is so damn cute. Erik used to do cute rhymes with her name around the quad whenever she got down on herself or he thought he had her on the ropes to giving in to him. Rarely worked, but constantly appreciated. “I gotta go get some extra stuff for our dinner party later this week, so hopefully I won’t be too long at the studio. We got a new artist laying down a demo that should be pretty fire.”
Erik puts a fist to his mouth excitedly. “Oh worm? Finally my lady finna be the new M-M-M-Maybach Music!”
Kimara rolls her eyes. “I’ll be more than that! I got about two songs on there I’m getting writing credit for. I may wind up on the radio and you don’t even know it. But you’ll know them checks!”
Erik couldn’t smile harder if he had hooks in his mouth. “Your passion got you going off! Nothing wrong with it either, you deserve it. It’s been a long time coming.”
“It has. So, go on so I can make this deal happen.”
They locked fingers until distance forced them to break their grip. Erik waves off Kimara as she saunters up the path to the main road. His chest swelled with pride over his lady, she’s always been one of a kind. Her happiness is his happiness, without question. As he walked away, across the exquisitely decorated post modern/art deco lobby, to the elevator to the 33rd floor to his office, a cloud of dread weighed back on him that only got better with the help of Alaina. If she wasn’t his partner on this revamp project with Boeing, he’d be shitting himself on a regular.
Erik walks by a conference room, stopping short of turning the corner of the glass walls. He opens the door and peeks inside to see his friend hunched over a laptop, jumping slightly in her seat as he came across the room towards her.
“Damn, Erik! Why do your big ass feet step so lightly? Almost gave me a heart attack!” She breathed out a ragged sigh of relief.
Erik pulls out a chair to sit down, chuckling at her expense. “My bad, I just had to come in when I seen you slaving away in here. Figured you could use a distraction.”
Alaina smooths her hair back in her bun, her nude colored mouth in a tight, closed smile.
“I WISH you were a distraction for me, but unfortunately this involves the both of us. While you were on break, Asshole and Son recommend we draft a final proposal for the FAA to approve.”
Erik sat shocked. “What? Fuck, I mean that’s fucking crazy but kind of exciting too, right?”
She wags her finger. “Don’t forget we are only the field niggas round here. It sounds like an honor but in the end I am sure little Leave it to Beaver will be taking all the credit his daddy can send his way in order to keep the big wigs in good graces within the family.”
Erik taps his fingers on the deep wooden table, thinking. Would they really double cross him that far? Bringing him in on a project to mentor the bosses son only to pull the rug up under him and make him look like player two?
“That’s so damn white, sounds right.” Erik sighs in somewhat disbelief.
Alaina shrugs. “Told you. And until I hear it from him otherwise, that’s what I’m going to assume.” Alaina sighs and stretches her shoulders before going back in on the keyboard.
Erik furrows his brow. “If that’s it, then why are you still working on it? Don’t you wanna pack up and move on? You were brought here special for this, your time is wasted the most.”
Alaina’s eyes cast a ‘nigga please’ gaze on Erik. “Mr. Future Baby Fava, I think our time has been equally wasted. But guess what isn’t cut for my time here? My pay: which is double what I make at my primary while I’m here so…” She slowly leans over to grab Erik’s wrist. “...until I hear the fat white man sing, we’re gonna work on this project for as long as we can to milk that cow til it lays a golden goose egg and rolls the tortoise to the finish line!”
Erik scoffs. Alaina’s antics are half the reason Erik can’t quite distance himself from her. She has a liveliness that he’s kind of missed lately. “Man, you a trip and a fifth. But I like your style. Might as well get it done then.”
“Oh fuck that, I’m done for the day.” Alaina crisply closes her laptop, packin it under her arm and grabbing her case with the other.
“Whatchu mean? I thought you said-”
“I worked through my lunch, like a boss ass bitch does. You gotta work yours off, so Imma leave you to it. Call me if you bleeding out your ears from stress: no less than that.”
Erik rolls his eyes as he gets up and watches her walk away. The woman is working his last good nerve on purpose, but he likes it. The job isn’t as boring or predictable with her around. Now he just has to show her who the superstar has been all this time. If he works hard at this, it won’t be for these fat cats, it’s gonna be a bonafide competition and he ain’t scared to fight a girl.
—
At the studio, Kimara finishes up a session with a local up and coming artist named Delilah. Sweet girl, comes across very introverted until a mic is in front of her. Kimara appreciated her vibes and talent, baby girl is on trend so long as she stays cute she is bound to be noticed. Kimara ends their session a little early, wishing her well when it was time to wrap.
Kimara felt like the studio was her second home most of the time but today she had to get to her real home REAL quick to get dinner prepared. Tonight is the double dinner date with T’Challa and his boo of the moment. She kept trying to get ahold of Erik for help with ingredients but he kept leaving her on read.
Rick, the studio owner caught Kimara before she was able to get out the door.
“Hey Rick I know I cut things early, but I don’t have a lot of time unfortunately. I have dinner to take care of tonight with some friends that is so damn important, you wouldn’t believe.”
Rick smiles a large proud papa smile. “Oh I won’t keep you, but this news might. Remember Peter Gafflin? Legendary alternative rock/country artist extraordinaire who really love you last time y’all were in the booth together.”
Kimara couldn’t forget that man from their last session. She hadn’t been exalted for her talent that highly since Petey Pablo came in that one time and promised her name would be on a Freek A Leek remix.
“Yeah, what about him?” She asks.
Rick could not help his smile to save his life. “He called me up earlier today, saying he is planning to go on the road soon.”
“Yeah, yeah. That happens often when you drop a new album.” Kimara says impatiently.
“Right. So he was thinking that you would hopefully be available to join him for some shows on his North American leg of the tour.”
Kimara stood there like the Men In Black just wiped her memory. “Are-are you serious? When? How? What would I do??”
“He wants you to SING for him like you did that day, background vocals and he thought a duet portion would be nice too. You know the song ‘Boys Aren’t Born on Tuesdays?’”
Kimara clutches her chest. “Oh my God, that song is so rich. And he wants ME to sing it with him?”
“Uh huh!’ Rick slaps her arm in congratulations, but Kimara could barely feel anymore.
“In front of thousands. Across America...oh my God!”
Rick and Kimara hug excitedly, so much so that Rick has to wipe his eyes a little. “So is that a yes?”
Kimara stopped cheering to finally think a little. “I mean, I don’t know. If this was any other time I would say yes, but...I have some obligation here. I’m deep into trying to start a family and settle a little.”
Rick makes a face of pity. “I understand, I know. And I hope you do get that. Just…”
“Just…” Kimara parrots.
“...it’s Peter Gafflin.”
“It is Peter Gafflin.” Kimara says disheartened. She had been waiting for years to get something off the ground with a top tier artist, but the universe had a funny way of timing.
“Did I mention how much pay is?” Rick muses.
--
Kimara fans herself with a newspaper as she watches the rolls baking in the oven. She is so thankful to have gotten dessert from the bakery, because she was over it with cooking. She checks her phone for the time: ten minutes til 7. Her notifications show nothing from Erik yet, though she texted him twice today reminding his to not forget them hosting T’Challa and his girl. Twice, Erik texted that he’s got her, but that was five hours ago, now who knows what the hell he is up to. It would be perfect to bring up her good news with him in front of T’Challa and his date, while he smiles up at her with a hand inconspicuous and possessively on her behind...
But the light and fluffy feelings for the evening were quickly dwindling. Before she could send a last threatening text to convince him to bring his ass, the doorbell sounds at the last sentence. Kimara curses out loud, grabbing her oven mitt to take out the rolls that are a perfect golden brown. She dabs her brow with a spare dinner napkin before clopping her way to the door.
Opening it with a flourish, Kimara opens her arms in excitement.
“You made it!” She says with a cheery song.
T’Challa looks at her fondly, his mouth slowly curling into a smile. Kimara warms up to seeing her friend at her doorway.
“I was going to say it has been too long, but time moves backward for you. You look beautiful.”
Kimara places a hand on her hip for emphasis, trying to withhold her joy in his compliment in the worst way. “Oh please, it hasn’t been that long. You cleaned up good too.”
Kimara always enjoyed the way T’Challa dresses like royalty without even meaning too, choosing pieces that elongate his lean body, squaring his wide shoulders to create a proud presence.
T’Challa places a hand to his date’s lower back. “Iman has been looking forward to this night all week.”
A smiling Iman holds out a bottle of Proseco. “T has told me so much about you and your husband. You all seem to be a pretty tight family.”
Kimara takes the chilled bottle and leads them inside. “Oh yes. We have all known each other for so long, I can’t imagine not having known them.”
Placing the bottle on the table, Kimara claps her hands anxiously. “So I have prepared us a nice little salad and a pork...uh...pasta ” Kimara’s mind goes blank trying to remember what it’s called, she had only Googled the recipe that day. Tapping her foot, fidgeting, Kimara gives up. “Hell, some type of pork and spaghetti with peppers and shit. It’s got cheese too, it’s good. LEGGO!”
T’Challa and Iman chuckle as they head to the dining room. “Well whatever it is it smells great! I know your man must be fat and happy living with you.” Iman gushes, pulling out her chair to sit at the table.
Kimara shakes her head humbly as the unwraps the foil on the proseco. “Lucky for me, he is pretty active at the same time so it sticks in the right places. If only he could actually BE in the right places when we schedule things that way. Oh shit, lemme find a cork opener.”
Kimara rushes into the kitchen slamming drawer after drawer looking for the elusive corkscrew. She slams the bottle down a little too hard in frustration and hears the vibration of her phone on the counter next to her.
“Do you need assistance, Kimara?” T’Challa’s steady, gentle voice says behind her. She turns to see his concerned face looking down at her, hands firmly planted behind him respectfully.
Kimara waves her hand in frustration. “Aht aht! It’s fine, don’t leave Iman alone in there!”
“She is fine. Are you?” He asks quietly while opening a cabinet above the sink.
Kimara opens her phone to look at her notification. “Been better. Rather not talk while I’m supposed to be entertaining you guys.”
“But-”
Kimara puts her phone down hard. “RAGU! It was a pork ragu! With basil fettuccine, ugh! DUH!” Kimara turns to see T’Challa holding the corkscrew in his hand.
T’Challa continues, ignoring her topic change. “You should let me know if he isn’t being good to you.”
Kimara takes the corkscrew in one hand, bottle in the other trying to maintain her blood from boiling. “No I don’t. I would discuss that with my husband.”
“And he is where?” T’Challa asks calmly as Kimara walks past him and back to the table.
“God, what a help your beau is, we can finally have a much needed sip sip, eh?” Kimara exclaims a little too happily, sitting at the table as she drills the corkscrew in.
T’Challa opens the glass serving dish to examine dinner. “This smells very good, I will fix a plate for you, Iman.”
“No! I should serve you, Mr. King! Move your hand from that spoon.” Iman gets up, swinging her hips happily from side to side, digging the serving spoon into the delicious mix of sauce, noodles, and meat.
T’Challa gives a shy smile. “I appreciate it greatly, thank you.”
Kimara jerks the corkscrew out of the bottle too hard, knocking the handle against the table, causing T’Challa and Iman to look at her with shock.
“Pop goes the weasel, right?” Kimara giggles as she pours a third of the bottle into her glass, half an inch from the brim. She takes ahold of her glass, taking a few hearty gulps.
“So! Tell me how are things with you all, still in the honeymoon phase?”
Iman finishes off her plate, settling in to eat. “Well, I wouldn’t say that. Me and T are still kinda getting to know each other still, so I think honeymoon phase is a little too soon to call,” she says as she nervously scratches the back of her head as T’Challa just keeps on eating.
Kimara starts to feel warm, keeping mental note that the fucking must’ve halted between them. “Well there’s no need to rush at all. Relationships are so much damn work, it must be nice to cuddle up to a stranger every so often.”
Iman offers some wine to T’Challa who declines. “Have things been going well at the studio? Recording?”
“Oh yeah, more than recording actually. Sure, I just wish that I had the gumption to pull the trigger on doing some of my own shit. I got a lot of praise from artist and even the owner of the studio; I’ve known him a long time. But when it all comes down to it I just wonder what’s the point. That’s all gonna change soon though, no worries about me!”
Iman pouts with sympathy. “What do you mean?! You are a damn good looking lady and to have talent enough that people brag about, you gotta do something with it while you’re young and able!”
“I know I’m young and able. Well, I’m trying to start a family while I’m still young and able too.” Kimara mumbles, slumping in her chair.
“Oh! You are? Congratulations! From what little I remember from the night I met T, he seemed like a handsome guy with a good head on him. If he hadn’t brought us home, we may not be seeing each other now.” Iman’s hand disappear under the table to presumably T’Challa’s thigh, who looks over at her with kind eyes. “And that reminds me of your story. So T here got you and your husband together. What are the details on that?”
Kimara is two sips from the bottom of her glass. “Ohhh, that’s not dinner conversation unfortunately.”
Iman makes eyes at her. “Oooh, that scandalous huh? We all adults here, but I understand. Me and T weren’t very biblical our first night meeting so, hey.”
T’Challa wags a finger. “It’s not that, don’t be crass.”
Iman tuts at him. “I’m just being friendly, what’s the issue.”
“It’s a personal story. It should wait until Erik is here at least.” T’Challa offers.
Kimara puts her glass down, plate still empty or any dinner. “I don’t wanna bring that nigga up here anymore tonight, aight?”
Iman freezes mid bite as T’Challa sits up in his chair. “Kimara, please-”
“Uh uh! I’m in my house, I say what I want, I won’t be talked down to. Iman?”
Iman is still frozen.
T’Challa speaks up. “I’m just saying-”
“I’m talking! Iman? My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for months now, fucking like rabbits and I have yet to get pregnant. It’s gotten so I think he;s getting tired of fucking with me and now he is out ‘working late’. Now, he loves me because we have been through a lot to get to the point of being a married couple and he has had to prove himself loyal to me after...a lot of bullshit. But I ain’t got it in me to discuss play the Newlywed Game with you cuz hell if I know what my husband is up to anymore.”
T’Challa gets up from his chair abruptly, scraping the chair across the floor, stomping towards the kitchen.
Kimara starts to laugh out loud. “Oh shit, I think he’s pissed! Ohh, let me see what this is about…”
Iman sits up anxiously. “Do you need help?”
“No, no! I got him, he’s very reserved with his frustrations, so I can deal.” Kimara stomps into the kitchen. “Now what is up with you??”
T’Challa takes a towel off of a rack, folding it twice. “Did you need to unload on her like that?”
Kimara leans on the counter. “Sure, woman to woman. She seems to appreciate it.”
T’Challa opens the oven door, a plume of smoke billows out.
“Fuck! Oh noooo, my rolls!” Kimara exclaims, running to a window to open and fan out the smoke.
T’Challa puts the baking sheet to the sink. “I was trying to tell you I smell smoke.” He tossed the towel down making the sheet clang.
Kimara fans her face, coughing. “Oh, shit. I just forgot.”
“Mhm. You forgot your head this evening that’s certain.”
“What do you mean by that, T??” Kimara asks mockingly.
T’Challa glares at her. “If things weren’t going good, we could’ve rescheduled.”
“It’s funny you think I plan for my life to fall apart, cuz that is how it works right?”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“No, no one means to hurt my feelings or make me feel like shit until it happens. You want me to be the perfect host. Erik wants me to be a good wife and mother when I can’t even get a bun in the ov-” Kimara stops short of the sentence. T’Challa hangs onto silence waiting for her to finish.
“T’Challa, what if this is all a sign? I burnt the rolls in the oven...because I can’t keep a bun in the oven? Like pregnancy? I can’t bake anything!!” Kimara wails as she covers her mouth crying. T’Challa goes over to her but stops short as Iman enters the kitchen.
“Hey, if everything is under control, I might head out.”
T’Challa looks back at Kimara then Iman. “Well, let me call you a ride.”
“Already did. Kimara, dinner really was good, I’m sorry to leave so soon.”
Kimara has her back turned, wiping her face before facing her. “Thank you for coming. You’re as nice as I heard.”
“I will walk you out then.” T’Challa offers as they leave Kimara in the kitchen. Her phone begins to ring, as she picks it up to find Erik’s name glowing on the screen. All she can do is silence it, she was in no mood to talk, otherwise she might have to make a Lemonade album about it.
Kimara goes back to her dining room table, sitting down to the bottle of wine. T’Challa comes back in, closing the front door behind him.
“Eh, eh. Put that down. Eat something instead.”
Kimara groans as she swallows one more gulp from the bottle before getting it snatched from her hand.
“I’m not feeling your vibes T’Challa, honest.”
“Vibes? Do you hear yourself talking?”
“Yeah I do. That’s all I ever hear is my damn self.”
“You are not supposed to be drinking while planning a family, aren’t you?” T’Challa asks softly, sitting next to her.
Kimara sighs deeply. “I’ve done everything right. All I’m supposed to do is carry, I can’t even get there. God, I would kill for even a miscarriage, just to know that I didn’t completely fuck up my reproductive system!”
“STOP IT!” T’Challa’s voice booms between them, reverberating off the walls. Kimara sits upright, looking away from T’Challa’s face. His energy calms as he leans a little further towards her.
“You do not deserve to beat yourself up like this. Do you realize how far you’ve come in life from when I first met you to now? There is no one as smart or witty or brilliant as you that I can also put faith in as a friend.”
Kimara fidgets with her fingers. “Good thing Iman isn’t here to hear that.”
T’Challa sits back, taking a swallow of wine from the bottle himself. “I won’t edit my statement, but she is a nice girl.”
“I still like Nakia better.” Kimara says matter of factly.
T’Challa bristles at the name, looking into the distance. “Yes, I guess she is my kryptonite, however too flighty.”
They sit in silence for a beat.
“What about that night? What did it mean?” Kimara asks.
T’Challa’s brow furrows. “Which do you…”
“A few weeks ago? My car?” Kimara rubs her face roughly. “Ughh, I hope it’s not the wine talking but I swear there was a moment that felt like...a thing. Am I wrong?”
T’Challa does something he does not always do: he begins to stutter. It’s slow, without the skip, but a stutter nonetheless.
“I...Well...hmm,” He says before his mouth motions wordlessly.
“...T?” Kimara asks teasingly. “It’s ok!”
He looks her in her eyes intensely, like she just cursed him out. “Huh?”
Kimara shrugs. “We didn’t do anything so it’s ok. Don’t sweat. That’s why I’m glad we are friends cuz I know nothing bad happens when you’re around. No craziness, drama, you just bring me back down to earth with a good talk. It was just a moment. Gotta remember that.” Kimara pats his knee and gets up.
“Wait, so were you thinking of me in a way that night?”
Kimara sees a light flash across the curtains of her window. “Well, look at this. Daddy’s home.” Kimara comes back to the table to pick up plates. “T’Challa go ahead and have a good night. You don’t wanna be here when I’m throwing dishes into the sink until Erik comes in and has the nerve to ask what the fuck is wrong with me. When the whole nigga nerve of it all is that he would have the gall to think I’m wrong to begin with!”
T’Challa waves his hands heading for the door. “I am already gone.”
--
The early morning sun is extra bright as erik drives himself and Kimara to see their regular fertility specialist Dr. Tracy.
“I’m glad she was able to see us today.” Erik says.
“Are you?” Kimara asks while scrolling through her phone.
Erik scratches himself. “Ion know, I just…”
“What?”
“I mean...if we do this it’s like cool, we finna get a baby off top-”
Kimara tuts at him. “No! She said that it still isn’t guaranteed. We are good candidates but not to expect success right away.”
Erik lets out a groan. “Right, right. Can’t no shit come easy for me.”
Kimara looks at his profile as he drives, catching Erik looking out the corner of his eye. “What you lookin at me like that for?”
Kimara crosses her arms. “I’m just trying to figure out what to title your sob story in all of this. ‘I do what I want and when it don’t go like I plan I pout?’ Or ‘Fuck everything and everyone, I’m going through it but don’t ask me what’s wrong?’”
“Damn Mara! The fuck you gotta go there for? The minute I try and share something with you, you bite my fucking head off!”
“Watch yourself cursing at me! I ain’t in the mood for it, and I ain’t letting it fly like that today, ok? I don’t need this much excitement before an appointment.”
“Then don’t go nuts on me like you some damn comedian, roasting my ass. I’m here ain’t I?”
“Do you not wanna be?!” Kimara shrieks.
Erik goes silent, turning on the click of his turn signal. The tension in the car is sky high and although Erik doesn’t mind a fight, he knew not to act a fool in front of these doctors in this side of town.
Kimara leads inside to check in with the receptionist. As they sit in the lobby, Erik is glued to his phone the entire waiting period, fingers texting furiously.
“Why ain’t you holding my hand?” Kimara asks. “You always hold it while we wait.”
Erik looks over quickly and leans back offering out his hand. “My bad.” While the other continues to work double time on his screen.
“Who is...Alan?”
Erik jerks his phone back. “It’s not Alan.”
Kimara drops his hand. “Than who is it?”
“Work.” He says curtly, flipping to his Instagram instead.
“Is something wrong with the project you’re working on? Is Alan the one helping you?”
“Yes and no.” Erik says.
“Wait. It is wrong and Alan isn’t helping?”
“It’s not Alan!” Erik bellows before coughing to cover his outburst.
“Kimara?” Dr. Tracy says brightly with a smile, waving them back. Kimara smiles tightly back.
In her office, Dr. Tracy goes over the procedures and preparations for IVF, with all of the medical jargon, followed by some generous simplified explanation. It all sounded complicated and expensive but Kimara was grateful to hear about everything that could make her miracle possible.
“And Erik, you can be an awesome support by making sure to watch your alcohol intake, exercise, eat healthy, and avoid any environmental pollutants.”
“I was bout to watch that Chernobyl show; is that off the table now?” Erik asks.
“Erik, you ain’t got time for shit else, quit playing.” Kimara says with a little bark in her voice.
Erik laughs in a menacing tone. “Ok.”
Dr. Tracy looks between them nervously. “...we also provide counseling to couples during the process, as it can be difficult.”
“I wouldn’t mind it, but he wouldn’t be able to make it.” Kimara says.
“Oh you speak for me now?”
Kimara shrugs. “If you ain’t there, how else can things go forward?”
Erik sputters in disbelief. “I won’t be getting like this in front of the damn doctor. Thanks, doc. I got the prescription and shit, let’s go.” Erik keeps talking under his breath as he leaves the office. Kimara gets up to leave
“Is everything ok between you two?” Dr. Tracy asks.
Kimara hesitates before saying it’s fine, nothing more than a couples spat. Erik may have been right about needing to change doctors. At least a new one wouldn’t know when things were wrong. This would just look like a normal interaction to fresh eyes.
Back at their house, Erik is reading the instructions for her shots.
“Says this supposed to help in producing eggs for you. Still gonna take a while though.”
Kimara sits silent watching her shows.
“Remember to mark down when you got your period last. Supposed to start doing these on your next cycle.”
Silence.
Erik folds the instructions up, standing from the dining room table. He comes up behind the couch, leaning next to Kimara’s ear.
“Nassau is this weekend, you know?” SIlence. “You picked us a real good spot to make our own magic down there. I think we need it.”
“WE need a lot more than a trip to an island. Erik, you still ain’t said sorry for a damn thing you said to me today.”
Erik scooches to one side of Kimara to face her. “What should I apologize for?”
“Embarrassing me? Not telling me about what’s going on with you and also not asking how things are with me? Being secretive and mean to me?” Kimara’s eyes begin to well up. “You ain’t talked to me without walking off mad in so long, I don’t wanna get used to it Erik! You didn’t used to do that!” Erik hooks one leg followed by the other over the back of the couch to sit next to Kimara, holding her hands tight.
“It makes me think about before you left for that damn military out the blue. You snapped on me back then too. You tryna go somewhere else again?”
“Hell no! That life is behind me, I got nothing but you and work to get through now.”
“So I’m a damn task?” Kimara mopes.
“No! Look: I don’t mean to say anything to make you think you boring because you’re not. You’re the most exciting thing in my life, and I love having you with me. Every time I’m reminded you’re my wife, I’m thinking how we should be on our damn tenth wedding anniversary instead of third. But I’m done and thankfully you’re not.”
“Then why are you doing me like this?”
“I-I don’t wanna force shit on you more than you can handle. I got things happening at my job right now that could make you think the worst, but I promise it’s not. And you don’t need that pressure right now.”
“Neither do you!”
“I can handle it. You focus on your dreams at the studio, and getting ready to host the biggest headed baby your womb will ever know.”
Kimara snorts thinking about this, looking down instinctively. Erik takes one side of her face in his hand.
“I wanna be more open but I don’t wanna cost you anything too. So until shit blows over, just know I got this. Be patient with me, and I promise to be more patient too.”
Kimara pulls Erik to her for a longing kiss, rubbing his face for comfort. She could feel he cares, but there was still so much gnawing in her mind, she just wasn’t ready to discuss. But there was one thing.
“One more thing though, before I call it forgiven and get to packing for the trip.”
“You still ain’t packed?”
“I’m asking the questions! Who is Alan?”
Erk sighs, dipping his head down before looking her in the face to answer. “Alaina.
“He’s a what?”
“Huh? No, Alaina. The name was Alaina not Alan.”
Kimara’s face draws up inquisitively. “And...she is?”
“My partner for the project I’m working on. They recruited her from another region and-”
“That’s who you spent the night with instead of dinner with T’Challa and me and his girl?” Kimara asks.
“I came home! Don’t make it sound like that, it was a late night. Ole dude I work for keeps piling shit on me and deadlines-”
Kimara waves her hands in front of him. “It’s fine.”
“Huh?”
“It’s ok!” Kimara smiles. “Seriously, I trust you. You said works been beating your ass, and I know you wouldn’t be looking all sour if you were getting some ass on the side, so I think I can trust you aren’t cheating.”
Erik stared at her speechless before nodding and agreeing.
“Plus, we tryna have a baby and I know you wouldn’t mix shit up with her when all that seed is mine, like that would be wasteful.”
Erik growls in his chest, leaning over her, nose to nose. “Say that again.”
Kimara holds back her smile, rubbing his chest. “Your seeeed is miiiine. Don’t waste it.” Kimara bites his lip at the end of ‘it’, catching him of guard, but not enough to lay her out legs spread quicker than she could blink.
“Wait wait, Erik. I can’t!” Kimara says, half giggling.
“Whatchu mean?? You playing with a dog and get afraid when you get the bark? Quit playing and get them draws off.” Erik pulls at her bottoms.
“No! Wait! I mean it, I’m cramping and shit. I don’t want nothing near my pussy right now.”
Erik moans out loud in frustration, plopping backwards on the couch, erection pushing at his sweatpants.
Kimara lowkey loved making him wait, period or not. It’s nice to see he still wants her, and no one else has his attention to fix his rather big problem throbbing in his pants.
“Erik? You never told me what you think about the tour.”
Erik exhales loudly. “Good idea, that’s finna kill my hard on real quick.”
“Erik!”
He sits up, pushing down on himself. “Mara, I want you to get your hustle goin, I know you been singin since way way way back.”
“Hold up, it ain’t been that long, makin me feel old.”
Erik bops her with his shoulder. “You know you been my Suga Mama.”
“Two months older Erik. Dassit!”
Erik looks at the floor, rubbing her knee. “I just don’t understand why you think it’s best to leave now. What Imma do without you for two months?”
“Whatever you been doin get home late at night.” Kimara says flatly.
“The project is almost finished, do I don’t know where that attitude came from.”
Kimara sits silent, not up for a fight, especially in her hormonal state.
Erik stares at her, testing her. He knows she wants to say more, she always does. “I got two more weeks on this, and it’s done. My workload is gonna be lighter, more boring, and I promise my time will be yours, but now you wanna leave, so.”
“But you understand why right? It doesn’t sound like you do. I don’t wanna leave you alone or stop trying, but...this is my dream!”
“Having a family is too right? That’s why all our time and money been revolving around everything related to that for almost a whole damn year. It’s fucking flaky.” Erik shoots back.
“Erik, you got to do what you wanted, right? This ain’t new with you! When you want something, you go for it, fuck anybody that gives a shit, it’s yours. I’m tired of being in the shadow of your shit, cleaning things up so you can have your peace. This is mine.”
“The fuck is you talkin about?? Is your PMS going retrograde or some shit?” Erik speaks over her in an agitated tone. Nothing Kimara said made sense anymore to him.
Kimara gets up, waving him off. “Eat my ass Erik, I said what I fucking had to say and I mean that shit.”
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16
I've been feelin’ like I'm crazy 'Cause I'm goin’ through your phone, look for somethin' wrong I can't find nothin' I must be trippin' tryna listen to my intuition Sayin' you're guilty So baby, just tell me
Gut Feeling x Ella Mai ft. H.E.R.
“Mm.” I hummed as I got comfortable in Mackai’s bed. The ride home was filled with nothing but laughs and jokes. The drinks he’d tossed back earlier had him feeling like a whole comedian. He made jokes about my head, and I had to humble him real quick, letting him know his was twice the size of mine. The nerve.
His California King sized bed was such an upgrade from my full size in my room at Z and I’s apartment. My bed was everything, but the amount of space Kai had on his made me jealous. You could actually roll over a few times and not fall off the bed. It made it no better that his mom helped him decorate, the sheets were to die for. I had to remember to ask her what thread count they were.
“You enjoying yourself?” He chuckled. I opened one of my eyes to look over at him smirking from the en suite. “Definitely.” I laughed. I had kicked my sneakers and jean jacket off, but I was still clothed in the bralette and jeans I had picked out earlier.
I shut my eyes again and heard him shuffling across the room. It was quiet for a second and I heard him rustling through his draws. Something hit my arm, and I opened both of my eyes to see one of his shirts. I smiled.
“Babe, can you take these jeans off me please?” I whined. The pet name slipped off my lips so much easier these days. Kai was mine... just not officially. But, I was okay with that. For now.
“Come here.” He mumbled. He got to the side of the bed I was on, and pulled me to him, using only my legs. I couldn’t stop laughing. “Why you put these shits on if you can’t take them off?” He asked. “I can take them off, I just wanted you to do it.” I let him know.
He arched his brow as I lifted myself up so he could pull them down. Once they were off me, I smirked at him peaking at my lace panties. I played dumb as I watched him fold my jeans and set them aside. I sat up and pulled my bralette off. I sat bare chested, smirking at him. He licked his lips and returned the smirk. “You ain’t gonna put the shirt on?” He asked. I shook my head ‘no.’
Sexual frustration isn’t something people should go through! This shit could really have you out of your mind. I swear if I knew this is what... withdrawal felt like, I would have stayed a virgin, I swear. Of course as a virgin, I got horny. But knowing what I was missing, made it even worse.
Having Kai around was no better either. I wanted to jump his bones every time he licked his lips. Shit was so ironic, I was the one saying I didn’t just wanna be fucked by him, but here I was- silently hoping he would just touch me. Nothing went pass the intense kissing and occasional feel up. But that alone would set my ass on fire.
“See something you like?” I teased. Instead of answering my question, he leaned down and kissed me. “Put the shirt on.” He mumbled on my lips after he pulled away. I looked him in his eyes, seeing he was serious. The scowl etched on my face made him chuckle.
I climbed back to the top of the bed and pulled the shirt on. I laid back, arms crossed, and pout on my face. He pulled his shirt off and disappeared into his bathroom. When I heard the shower start, I groaned and rolled over onto his side of the bed.
It sounded crazy, but the fact that he was respecting my wishes of us not rushing sex, just made me want to have sex with him even more. Like..? I swear this is why men think women are complicated.
I couldn’t believe this was where we were. Two whole months into dating Kai and not once had he tried anything. I mean, I didn’t want to rush either, but this couldn’t be real life. I had needs, and as a man, I knew he did to. And if he wasn’t having sex with me... he had to be getting it somewhere else. Right?
I sighed. I was too in my head about this. I was literally in here, talking to myself. Was this what lack of sex did to people? I needed to chill. I shook the thoughts out of my head. I grabbed the remote from the bedside table and turned the TV on. I switched to Netflix and found something to watched.
I settled on the “She’s Gotta Have It” series. I was already in love with Mars. Halfway into the episode, his phone buzzed from the night stand. I looked at the time on the alarm clock, 1:04 am, and then back to the screen. It’s not your business, Nae. Instead of thinking too hard about it, I immersed myself in the series... until Kai decided to step out of the bathroom with just a towel wrapped around his bottom half. The water still visible on his tattooed arms, chest, and abs.
He payed me no mind as he sauntered around the room. He dried himself off and dropped the towel. He pulled on a pair boxers and then some shorts. See? This was the shit that made me wanna fight him. “Can you take me home?” I asked in a firm voice. “You wanna go home?” He repeated like he didn’t just hear me clearly. “Yeah.” “Why?” “Because.” He kissed his teeth.
“What’s the problem Naomi?” He swore he was so slick. “Kai, stop playing with me. I know what you’re doing.” “What am I doing?” He played dumb. I stared at him, watching the smile slowly take over his face. “... Okay.” I reached for my jeans and he started cracking up.
“Aight, aight. Chill.” He laughed, pulling the jeans from my hands. I rolled my eyes at him while he got comfortable in the bed. He somewhat sat up against the headboard, and I couldn’t help myself but to cuddle up into him. He smelled so good, I couldn’t help but sigh. I laid my head against his torso, making sure to rub over his naked abs.
“This what you in here watching?” He asked pulling me out of my trance. I glanced up at the television and noticed Nola and Mars having sex. Well shit, one of us deserves to have fun tonight. “He ain’t even stroking her shit right. You gotta make sure them thighs pushed all the way back. Touching the mattress type shit.” He grumbled before putting his interest back into his phone.
My eyes closed at the thought. Having Mackai in between my leg...having him push them back into the mattress, while looking deep into my eyes. My body grew hot at the the fantasy. I unconsciously squeezed my thighs together and let out a breath.
Once I opened my eyes, I could tell Kai was no longer interested in the show. He didn’t even bother to pretend he was either. He kept his head in his phone, but it didn’t bother me. I knew he had to be handling business. I looked up at him, seeing how focused he was. He was so fine, I thought as I admired his features.
I looked down at the Supreme boxers he wore underneath the basketball shorts. I could see his print through the shorts, and I bit my lip. I accidentally, on purpose slid my hands over his shorts slowly. “Sorry.” I apologized quietly. I didn’t even bother to look up at him. I did it again, before I found myself gripping him through his shorts. Jesus.
“Damn Kai.” I examined how big he was in my hand. He wasn’t even hard. Oh my God. “Nae, what the fuck?” He was cracking up. “What’s wrong with you?” He asked swatting my hand away from him. “So that’s what it is? That why these hoes can’t leave you alone?” He found my questions amusing, still cackling.
I had seen Kai’s dick print time and time again. And of course, I was impressed. But it was different to a have that thing in my hand! The boy was blessed. The arguments and fights these girls would have over him back in the days all made sense now! It was as clear as day.
“I’m shook.” I professed, sitting up and against the headboard. He was still laughing. “You a trip yo.” He shook his head. “Kaiiiii, I can’t believe you’ve been holding out on me!” I sighed. He continued to laugh. “I’m glad this is funny to you.” Another chuckle.
I rolled my eyes. After his laughter died out, we sat in silence. Why was I not getting dicked down right now? Felt up? Something! I was literally yearning for this man’s touch. Is this what they meant by being careful of what you wish for? Because I was slowly, and surely regretting it.
“You still fucking other girls Kai?” I asked. I was honestly afraid of the answer he was about to give. Not because I knew it would hurt my feelings, but because I knew I’d end up beating his ass in this room. The silence made me look over at him.
Still immersed in his phone, I smacked my lips. “Hello? You don’t hear me talking to you?” He kissed his teeth. “Nah. Now go on with that bullshit.” He muttered. “How is it bullshit Kai? I just asked a simple question. Yes or no?” I was starting to get mad. Why couldn’t he just answer a simple question?
More silence.
“Yes or no Kai?” “Nae, didn’t I just tell yo ass to go on with that bullshit?” “Kai, you really about to piss me off. Just answer the damn question!” I raised my voice. “You better calm yo little ass down.” He mumbled, not looking away from his phone. It sounded like more of a warning, if anything, but I wasn’t about to back down.
“Or what Kai? Or what? You lied to me!” He chuckled bitterly, and shook his head. “Crazy ass girl dawg.” He muttered to himself. “Crazy? Imma show you crazy!” I stood up in the bed. I snatched the phone out his hand. “Which one of these bitches is texting you this late? You don’t even have the decency to hide the shit!” I yelled.
I looked down at the iPhone screen to see a webpage for sports cars. I exited the safari to his messages, scanning my way from the top to the bottom. There were messages from unsaved numbers, but once I went to the thread they either were from months ago, the number had been blocked, or both.
I took my seat back in the bed. Social media was next.. Dozens on dozens of heart eye emojis flooded his comments and DMs. None of the recent ones were met with answers. I shut my eyes and sighed. Crazy ass girl, what are you doing? That’s all I could ask myself.
“Here.” He said passing me another iPhone. When I didn’t take it from him, he dropped it on the bed. “111363 is the password for both of em. Go crazy.” He stated. He exited his room, and I just stood there, looking stupid. I groaned and sat on my knees. I locked the first phone before putting them both on the side table.
I pushed myself off the bed and made my way around the spacious three bedroom condo. Juju wasn’t here, she had been MIA all week. Claiming to have been busy, but I wasn’t gonna stress her. If she was busy she was busy. I found him in the living room, slumped on the couch, scrolling through the channels.
“You ready to go?” He asked keeping his eyes on the screen. “To go?” I was confused. “Yeah, I’m taking you home.” Without giving me time to process, he shut the TV off and got up from the coach. I followed behind him as he headed back to his bedroom. “Mackai.” I called as he ignored me and disappeared into his closet.
Once he emerced, he had pulled on a hoodie, socks, and slides. He then started to gather my things; my phone, sandals, bralette, and jeans.
“Kai, you really kicking me out right now?” I was really at a loss for words right now. He didn’t respond. The look on his face read boredom. I snatched my jeans and slipped them on before grabbing my phone and shoes. I headed for the front door with him on my tail. I swung the door open and waited until he hit the locks of his Jaguar.
I opened the passenger door and made it my business to slam that shit. Fuck him and this dumbass sports car. I heard him chuckle darkly before he slipped into his seat. He pulled out of his driveway and we rode in silence toward my apartment. I stayed my ass quiet, because honestly, I was too drained to argue. I knew I was wrong for accusing him, but kicking me out?
When we pulled into my complex, he didn’t even bother parking in the closet spot. Instead, he pulled up to the front of my building and put the car in park. “I don’t know what kind of niggas you was dealing with before me, and I don’t care what kind of nigga you thought I was before we got together. I told you, if we was gonna do this, I was gonna be all in. I cut all the bullshit I was doing before you said you’d give me a chance. I put time and effort into this.”
He continued, looking straight ahead. “And you still questioning my intentions. I haven’t done anything wrong, and I never plan to. But, if you feel like in the back of your mind, I would treat you in any way, shape or form anything less than you deserve, we should just dead this right now. I don’t wanna waste your time and I damn sure ain’t tryna waste mine.”
“Kai, it’s-” “Nah, Naomi.” My first name? Not “Nae” or “baby?” He was pissed. “I don’t got time for this shit. I told you what it was, and you know how I am about my word. These past few months I’ve done my best to show you I was serious, and you here accusing me of some bullshit.” He finally chuckled. “I’m cool on this shit.”
“Mackai, I didn’t mean to- Look. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have accused you-” “To be honest with you Naomi, I really don’t give a fuck about nothing you have to say to me right now.” He spat so calmly and coldly.
I was stuck.
I honestly didn’t know what to say.. what to do. I had never seen Kai this mad in my life. I sat there looking at him with the stupid pout on my face. I could feel the tears stinging the back of my eyes, but I refused to cry in this car. I pulled my seat belt off and exited the car silently, making sure not to slam the door again. I walked up the steps, I was surprised when I didn’t hear him speed off. It wasn’t until I was inside and shutting the door behind me, I heard the Jaguar speed off.
I kicked my shoes off at the door, and dragged myself to my room. I noticed Z’s TV was on, but honestly, I didn’t wanna be a bother. I waltzed into my room and shut the door. I shed my jeans and Kai’s shirt from my body and went to turn my shower on. I let the water warm up while I picked some clothes out to sleep in. Ironically, I settled on a pair of Kai’s boxers and a Ralph Lauren shirt he had left here.
I connected my phone to my Beats Pill and let my Hurt Hoe playlist blast all through my room. The sounds of Monica and Mary J. Blige rang through my room as I showered. I was probably being dramatic, but right now I didn’t care. I let all the hot water pelt my body and take away all my stress. I sighed as I began thinking about tonight.
There was no doubt in my mind that I was wrong. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.
I cursed at myself silently for potentially ruining everything we started to build. This self-sabotaging shit was for the birds. I just hoped that Mackai would hear me out and give me an opportunity to plead my case and give me a second chance.
After washing, I exited the shower and got dressed before laying down. I laid there staring at the ceiling as Jazmine Sullivan’s voice sounded through my room. I turned the music down and got more comfortable under my covers. It wasn’t before long that I felt my eyes get heavier and heavier.
I wasn’t sure about how long I had been asleep, but I jolted out of my sleep because I heard my phone ringing. I shot up and looked over at the alarm clock to see 3:58 am. I felt around my night stand for my phone and was surprised to see Mackai’s name on my screen.
I clicked accept, and before I could even greet him, his deep voice boomed from the other end. “Come open the door.” Again, he didn’t let me get a word in before he hung up. I rolled my eyes at his antics, but still obeyed his orders.
I scurried to the front door and swung it open for him. He was dressed differently from earlier. He donned a black hoodie instead of the grey one he pulled on earlier, all black jeans, and the black Timberland boots I loved to see him in. The scent of the Dior cologne I bought him radiated from his frame and I could see the slugs in his mouth.
Great.
He stepped in without invitation and I shut the door. He made me lead the way to my room. I was surprised when I felt him get dangerously close behind me and wrap me in a bear hug from behind. His scent engulfed me all at once and I could only shut my eyes as we waddled toward my room together.
Once we were inside, he hoisted me up quickly and I couldn’t help the screech that came from my lips. He shushed me and threw me on the bed. “I still got some sweats over here?” He asked as he kicked his boots off. I leaned over and pulled the bottom drawer open to fish them out for him.
A sting to my ass came right after and I had to hold back the scream that wanted to escape me. I knew Z was home and it was late as hell. “That hurt!” I exclaimed as I threw the shorts at him. “My bad.” He chuckled sexily. I watched as he emptied his pockets and rid himself of the jeans, hoodie, and watch before slipping on the sweatpants.
He got in the bed and made it his mission to pull me in close, and I swear my heart melted. “We gon talk about everything in the morning. Go back to sleep.” He said before planting a kiss on my shoulder. I didn’t even respond. I shut my eyes and let sleep consume me for the second time tonight.
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Chapter 18
Jaylen
If this lady asked one more question about my mom, I was bound to snap. I didn’t like talking about my mom to people, because it was too emotional for me. I don’t like talking about my emotions period. It’s bad enough that I’m already doing that shit now. She was trying to bring out a side in my that I was trying to keep locked away.
If I had drugs, I’d be fine. But dealing with all this shit while being sober was just too much. I couldn’t handle it. She was trying to make me face the problems that I had been avoiding for years.
“Look, I ain’t come here to talk about my mama all the fucking time.” I spat as she looked up from her notepad.
“Mr. Waters, I’m just trying to he-“
“Help me what? Cry?!” I yelled, frightening her a bit. Just as I fucking predicted, not even a second later, there were now tears running down my fucking face. I was trying so hard to prevent this shit, dawg.
“I can’t do this man..” more tears ran down my face as I started to gather my shit. She immediately rushed to my side, coaching me to take deep breaths like she did during every session.
Shit, she deserved a fucking raise dealing with my ass.
“Mr. Waters, I know it’s a touchy topic. In the end, you will see why I’m asking.” She assured me, rubbing my back as I wiped my tears with my shirt.
“Shit is fucking hard, man. That’s why I took drugs the way I did, because every single time I closed my eyes, all I pictured was the hurt and pain on her face when she was out looking for me. I was so fucking selfish. Ain’t care about shit but myself. I never got to tell her how sorry I was, that I loved her, nothing. And it’s like no matter how hard I try to forget, I can’t. I can’t because whenever I’m around Robyn, she reminds me of her so fucking much. Especially all the times I made her cry..”
“Would that be why you feel as though you need Robyn? She reminds you of your mother so much that you don’t want to disappoint her like you did with your mother?”
Hearing her say that stung. Shit literally gave me heart burn, but I knew it was true and that’s what hurt the most.
“Y-Yea..” I struggled to get out after a few seconds.
“What was her name?”
“Jamie.”
“What was she like?”
“She was everything and more. Swear I didn’t deserve her. She always put other people’s happiness before hers, because that’s how caring she was. She was so fuckin’ sweet, best mom anyone could ask for.” My eyes started to water again. I began to just give up on fighting the tears away before letting them fall.
“How’d she die?”
“Car accident.. I was her only child and she was crazy over me. I wasn’t answering my phone, so I guess she was speeding trying to find me.” I looked down at my shoes. My chest was getting tighter and tighter.
“What were your last words to her?” She questioned, as I sighed. I couldn’t say what I had said to her. I was too ashamed to say it.
Without thinking twice, I grabbed my belongings and left before she could ask me anything else. Of course, she was calling after me but I didn’t care. Shit, they’d probably kick me out for just leaving because that’s how strict they were but fuck it.
I wasn’t ready to have this conversation yet. I would have to smoke hella blunts before I ever decided to talk about this shit again.
“How’d it g-“ Kayla stopped her sentence once she noticed how red and swollen my eyes were from crying. Her fat ass was stuffing her face with a honey bun. She just told me she was on a diet before we came.
“Ion feel like talking Kayla, just take me home please.” I stated, leading the way towards the elevator. She didn’t argue, instead she just gave me my space and stayed silent the whole car ride to my condo.
I know I had killed her mood, but shit I was in a bad one myself.
**
As I walked through Odell’s shit, I seen Winter’s gay ass sitting on the couch talking shit on the phone about someone. I ignored her presence, making my way up to Robyn’s room.
I walked in quietly, so that she wouldn’t notice me. She stood in front of her body length mirror, spinning around in a pretty looking Cinderella dress as she talked to herself. “Girl, you are beautiful.” She smiled to herself, putting her hair up in a bun.
“You are.” I spoke, as she froze before quickly turning around to face me. She was about to tell me to leave until she noticed how messed up I was.
“Jaylen, what happened?” She asked, worried as she started to strip out of her dress. I sat down on the bed, waiting for her to put some clothes back on.
Once she threw on a t shirt, she sat down on the bed, as I laid down in between her legs. She rested her head on top of mines as she waited for me to speak. “I just needed you.” I spoke, interlocking my fingers with hers before squeezing them.
Fuck, I missed her.
“I’m here, always. I know it seems like Ive been acting like I don’t care, but I love you Jaylen and you can always talk to me whenever you feel the need to. What’s been on your mind?” She said assured me, kissing my cheek.
I started to regret the fact that I even fucking decided to kiss my ex. All that shit could’ve easily been prevented, and Robyn and I would still be together right now.
“I’m tired of fucking going to therapy, you know I don’t like that sappy shit. Been crying the whole fucking session.”
“It’s okay to cry. You have so many emotions built up inside of you that it’s ridiculous. What happened?”
I was about to speak until her phone lit up, and the screen read that nigga’s name.
“Why you fucking with that nigga, Rob? You’on love me?”
“Jay, were literally just friends and there’s no doubt that I do.” She sighed.
“I love you.. like it really don’t make no sense how much I do. I know I keep apologizing, but that’s how sorry I am.”
“You’re forgiven Jaylen. I told you that.”
I got up from the position that I was in, turning around to face her. Staring into each other’s eyes, I immediately crashed my lips into hers as we started to make out for a few seconds. My hands founds it’s way up her shirt, caressing her bare titties. Taking one in my mouth, I licked and sucked on her right nipple like my life depended on it. The moans that left her mouth was only motivating me.
Making my way back up to her neck, I started to leave marks every where to let niggas know that she was mines. The way her mouth hung open was making my dick hella hard.
I couldn’t wait to see the beautiful love faces she was about to make once I was deep inside of her. I wanted her and I needed her.
As I started to tug at the waistband of her panties, she quickly stopped me.
“I’m on my period..”
Clenching my jaw, I sighed before getting my jacket so that I could leave. Without saying shit, I left, slamming the door afterwards.
Once I got into my crib, I walked to my room, only to see Kayla in my bed asleep. I’m guessing she had fell asleep here waiting for me.
“Kay.” I shook her, because she was taking up most of the damn space. She wouldn’t get up for shit.
Snatching the blanket off of her small body, her short dress had came up, exposing her ass that was swallowing the black thong that she wore. My dick jumped instantly.
Hovering over her, I started to kiss on her neck, all the way down to her lower back. She started moving, so I know she felt it.
“What are you doi-“
“Fuck up.” She did as I said, turning over to start watching me strip out of my clothes. That’s why I fucked wit Kayla, she was down for whatever.
Kayla
I woke up, noticing that it was now pitch black outside. It was 11AM when I got here. Cursing to myself lowly, I reached to grab my phone off of the nightstand, but failed due to something holding me back.
I looked down only to see Jaylen’s big ass head on my stomach and his arms wrapped around my waist tightly. Raising up the covers, we both wore no clothes.
“Jaylen, let go.” I sighed as he held tighter. I knew it was a bad idea for me to stay, but I was honestly too tired to drive. I should’ve just took my ass home.
“Nah, you good.”
“Jaylen.” I groaned, as he sucked his teeth before letting go. I pushed him off of me, quickly grabbing my phone, gasping at all of the missed calls I had from Kai.
Putting my dress back on, I gathered all my things so that I could call him ASAP. Dialing his number, he answered just after one ring. I knew he was furious. “Fuck you been at Kayla?” He spat. I couldn’t tell him.
“Kai, I’m sorry I’ll explain everything when I get home.” He hung before anything else could be said, leaving me here looking dumb.
“What you going home for? He already mad.”
“Nigga I have a fucking daughter.” I rolled my eyes, looking for my thong that he had threw earlier. Once I found it, I put on my slides.
“Oh shit, that’s right. Aye, I’m sorry. I got carried away.”
“It’s a little too late to be apologizing.”
“You could’ve declined. You wanted it as bad as I did, baby.” I rolled my eyes, ignoring his psychotic ass, grabbing my keys so that I could get out of here. He wasn’t making this any easier.
Once I got in my car, I looked for my perfume so that I wouldn’t smell too much like Jaylen. I pulled out my mirror and gasped loudly at the various amounts of hickies that were plastered across my neck.
Yea, I was gonna be dead by the end of the night.
Robyn
“What’s wrong with you? Been quiet the whole plane and car ride back.” Eric asked as he sat my luggage down in front of my bed. I tried to hide my attitude, but I couldn’t because that’s how much Jaylen’s stupid ass had an affect on me.
I quickly got rid of my attitude, so that I wouldn’t have to explain anything to him. “Nothing, just tired.”
“Why you lying? I heard ya convo with Dej, I was just waiting on you to tell me wassup.”
“I didn’t want you to get mad.”
“Why would I do that? Even Stevie Wonder can see that you still love that nigga, that’s why ion be trying to rush into shit witchu’, cause I know yo bound to take him back.”
“I love him Eric.. a lot. I just don’t wanna make the wrong decision. To be honest, at this rate.. I don’t think we should even be cordial.”
“Why you say that?”
“Basically, he came over when we were at my brother’s place, and one thing led to another. I tell him I’m on my period, he leaves without saying a word. Meanwhile, we’re leaving the crib and I see my ex’s BM come out of his crib with hella hickies on her neck.” I explained, replaying the whole thing over in my head.
When Jaylen left me, he made me feel like a dirty ass hoe.
“Oh yea, dude gotta go. That’s fucked up.”
“What should I do?”
“Shit Robyn, you all the way out here in Memphis. You got a meeting next week about getting your store, and all these awards shows coming up. I can’t tell you how to live yo life, but do the math.” He kissed me on my forehead before leaving.
I sat here, letting his words sink in. He was right. Jaylen clearly didn’t give a fuck about me so why should I be worrying about him? I got other shit to worry about.
After today, I was never going back to New York.
**
As I was sleep, I felt kisses go from my stomach down to my inner thighs. I opened my eyes a little and noticed that Jaylen was in between my legs. Some where he stayed 24/7.
"Jaylen, let me sl-" my sentence was cut short due to the sound of me gasping once his tongue came in contact with my clit.
As he started to French kiss it, he added two fingers at the same time sending me over the edge. My soul was about to leave my damn body. "You like that?" He questioned, as he began to curl his fingers triggering my orgasm that was bound to come.
I nodded my head, looking him dead in the eyes as he smirked. "Use ya words." He smacked my thigh with his free hand.
"Yes!" I moaned out as he started pumping his fingers in and out in a faster pace.
"Jay, I'm bout to cum!" I yelled out in pleasure. He took his fingers out, pushing his face as far as it could go, sucking on my lips as if it were his last meal. I bit my lip, pulling on his black curls that were starting to grow back.
"Cum for me." He spoke huskily, making me leak like a faucet instantly. He licked, slurped, and sucked every drop until he couldn't anymore.
As I woke up from my dream, I sighed and realized being away from Jay was going to be harder than I thought.
“You’re hella nasty.” Deja scrunched up her face.
“What?”
“Bitch, you were loud as hell moaning his name in your sleep. What were you dreaming about?” She laughed, making me cover my face since I was embarrassed.
Yea, I needed to get to work so that I could take my mind off of this bullshit ASAP.
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GLOOMVERSE RP (FANFIC??)
(Hey look a picture that’s totally not just to get people’s attention haha wow)
OKAY SO- A BUNCH of people have asked Neon (@neon--nightmare) and I to make this roleplay public for reading! So we finally decided to do it!
THIS IS THE ROLEPLAY FOR THE FIRST TIME WALLIS GLOOM AND FRESH MET FACE TO FACE IN THE GV DISCORD RP. And not.... Face to mouth? Uh. First time they met and interacted in separate bodies. Yep.
CONTEXT:
- Wallis and Fresh have been at this for months, so there's a LOT OF TENSION AND FEAR. Wallis has been possessed twice before, and in that time, got a look into Fresh's own headspace- He's a stubborn asshole, so he pressed at things, and Fresh let slip that he had lost someone very close to him.
-Fresh wants Wallis GONE because he won't give up and keeps challenging his fragile worldview. Wallis is stuck between wanting to be free of the parasite's near constant harassment, and wanting to HELP because he can tell how much Fresh is truly suffering. He feels as though a compromise would be getting him to leave, BY helping.
-Wallis and Purple are actually back together in this rp! It took like 4 months of near constant rp, but we got there! At the point in time that this RP took place, Wallis was staying at Purple's house recovering from the second possession. He’s... Pretty badly injured.
-Cake had also stolen his hat about a week or so prior, so he was totally defenseless! Geez, please help him...
ADDITIONAL NOTES:
-None of this is CANON!! This is just a RP between fans!! Fresh and Wallis belong to CQ, we just love them. A lot. Though we try to be as IC as possible, nothing that happened here is actually official canon!!
- This rp treats the events of the ‘loveball/time party’ (a rping event from a year or so ago that can be found in parts on @bestfresh90smess) as canon to Fresh's character! This is for the sake of development, and to help give context to some of the emotional problems he's currently having that have carried on from there! ‘Pacifrisk’ was Fresh's only true friend that he met at the Loveball and slowly grew to care about, but right when he was coming to terms with that (and wanting to protect them even when it had no benefit to him, something he couldn't comprehend) they were killed despite his protests.
-There's a lot more drama and context surrounding this, so some things may not make sense!! We've tried to make it as concise as possible, though!
-THIS RP HAPPENED IN THE GLOOMVERSE ROLEPLAY DISCORD!! It's applicant based only, but if you'd like to send in a form you can do so at @gloomversediscord !! OCs are welcome, too!!
So, yep! Please enjoy, and be nice!! :D
[ROLEPLAY UNDER READ-MORE]
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh crept into the dimly-lit room, closing the door softly behind him. He could barely believe he had gotten in so easily - Purple hadn't been around and the front door didn't even seem to have been locked properly. It seemed almost too easy after all his planning, but hey, he wasn't complaining! Wallis had been practically asking for it anyway, with his 'tough guy' act and with all the problems he'd been causing escalating recently. And now here he was, with Wallis asleep and injured right in front of him!
The parasite leaned over his defenseless body, his grin widening until it looked almost painful. The YOLO letters on his glasses glowed faintly in the dark, as he gave the propellor beanie a flick and nudged Wallis roughly. "Rise 'n shine, Brahllis!! Wouldn't wanna all up sleep in an miss ya best brah, wouldja~?"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis groans quietly, screwing up his face in response to the rude wake up call and pulling the blanket a little tighter around his shoulders. What the fuck, why was Purple trying to wake him up NOW?? He wasn't even hungry, and his pain was just a dull ache, surely the pain meds hadn't worn off yet.... Though, it was a bit weird- His groggy sleep-drunk mind slowly chugged along and processed the situation... Purple usually woke him up gently, and that voice... He replays it in his mind, until the garbled words finally made sense.
Wallis' eyes snap open, entire body immediately going rigid as his breathing stuttered to a complete halt for a second. His mind spun, chest aching just a little more- Oh no, no no no... He didn't look up. He didn't WANT to look up, and acknowledge the truth. This couldn't be happening.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
The parasite smiled down at his terrified enemy over his shades, the cracked soul in his eye barely visible. "Glad ta see me again, homeslice~?" Fresh said in a dissonantly chipper tone, roughly grabbing Wallis's shoulders to prop him up and slip an arm tightly around his shoulders. "Cake slice wasn't lyin, brah, ya really letchaself go since da last time we all up had a friendly-like chat face ta face~!! Or would dat be thought-ta-thought or some junk?? Me ta ya?? Ah well, it ain't important anywho!!" The parasite gave Wallis' shoulder a quick squeeze, flicking a curl of hair on his forehead.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis' breath hitches as he's pulled up, unable to stop himself from hunching over and shuddering as that arm is slipped around him in an almost FRIENDLY manner- He knew better though, and the contact just felt like gasoline to the fire that was starting to flare up in his chest again. He instinctively leans away slightly, completely aware of how vulnerable he was like this. No hat, no wand, in a weakened state and already basically under control thanks to Fresh's grip on him. Was this the first time he'd ever seen the parasite in another form other than his own...? Either way, it was far too soon.
"I... I-" He chokes on his own words when Fresh squeezes his shoulder, flinching away from the hand that came towards his face. He doesn't even notice his own hand come up to lightly touch at his throat, curling into a loose fist there protectively. If he was possessed again... He seriously doubted his ability to escape in this condition. By this point, he was quite visibly shaking, eyes wide and staring down at his own lap, refusing to look at his tormentor still.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh chuckled at Wallis' obvious discomfort, a harsh sound that contrasted sharply with his fake-cheerful manner. His hand moved over to the bandages on Wallis' head and began undoing them none too gently, keeping a firm grip on the magician's shoulders all the while. "Aw, Brahllis, what's da dealio wit' dese~? Seems wicked inconvenient if ya cant see, yeah~?" There wasn't much of a point to this, and Fresh knew that - he just wanted to revel in Wallis' fear and pain a bit longer.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis grits his teeth together, completely frozen at the invasive action- He'd grown so used to the bandage being there, and around the eye was still sore... The eye itself was still almost completely a dark grey colour, and his vision itself was blotchy and dark. The bandage at least gave him an excuse to why he couldn't see. Fresh obviously had no concept of personal space- If he did, then he was doing a damn good job of making Wallis feel vulnerable, defenseless and alone- Wait, how did he get in?? Where was..?
Wallis suddenly tries to jerk away, finally looking up at Fresh with a mixture of horror and anger- The former seemed to overwhelm the latter, though. "Wh-Where's- What the funk did you do with Purple?!! Where's Purple!??"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh tightened his grip even more, digging his fingers into Wallis's arm before giving him a casual flick on the cheek. "Lingo, homeslice!!! Ya really gotta keep a better handle on yaself, yanno~? All up spreadin ya uncool vibes all over dis convo, dawg, dat ain't cool~" The parasite grin slipped a bit before recovering himself and tilting his head at the question. "Ya really gotta learn ta take a chill pill, broski!! Ah hahaha, ya sound maaaad <3"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis gasps, trying to shrink himself down as much as he could to get away from any and all contact Fresh was giving him. Right, of course he'd be able to censor... A chill goes down his spine, and he automatically closes his eyes as the bandage falls completely from his head at the movement- Looks like there was also a pretty nasty looking gash under there just above his eye. It had been healing nicely, but still looked pretty painful to the touch.
"Where. Is. He," He repeats, clenching his fists and trying to inch away from Fresh a bit. "Did you hurt him!?? I swear to GOD I'll KILL YOU if..."
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh raised an eyebrow at that, jostling Wallis a bit as he readjusted his grip. He ruffled Wallis' hair with his free hand, digging his fingers into his arm even harder at the same time. "Ahaha, ya really let yaself go, didntcha~? Guess I get what was up wit' dat bandage junk now, yo!!" Fresh let his gaze wander casually around the room, lingering on the door for an extra moment just in case. "Aha, watchin ya work yaself up like dat is totes HI-LA-RI-OUS!! Ya gonna KILL me, Brahllis~? Ya want me dead, huh~? Well, dawg, dats da prob I all up stopped by ta deal wit'!!"
The parasite suddenly whipped his head back around to face Wallis, his grinning face very close to the other's. "Ya been up an causin LOADS o totes unfresh probs lately, haven't ya~?"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis can't help his quiet noise of discomfort, sounding oddly like a low whine, shuddering as Fresh ruffled his hair. Only a few people were allowed to do that- The parasite absolutely not being one of them. He was finding it difficult to breathe, chest tight and thoughts disjointed and panicky- This entire meeting couldn't be at all good, he was at a loss for words, actions even moreso.
Though, Fresh seemed insistent that murder wasn't his strategy- Not his usual one, anyway- And surely he would have heard if Purple was in danger... Wallis both hoped and dreaded that Purple may still be in the house.
He flinches back as much as he could when Fresh turns to grin at him, eyes widening and skin becoming paler as the realisation dawned on him. Fresh wasn't here to possess him, or to harass him- He was keeping true to his word.
Fresh was here to KILL him.
Acting on pure impulse, Wallis lets out a cry, suddenly reaching out to shove at Fresh's chest in an attempt to push the other away from him, ignoring the pain that shot through his injured hand, breathing hard and fast.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Caught off-guard by the sudden escape attempt, Fresh loosened his grip on Wallis's shoulders and was pushed backwards a bit, his shades falling askew to reveal the host's eyes. The look of terror in the functional right eye was obvious - almost like they were trying to plead with Wallis for help. The parasite gave a quiet hiss, dropping his facade for a moment to glare at Wallis with a look of pure hatred. His grin returned almost as fast, however - contrasting even more sharply with the pain in the host's eyes.
Fresh swung his legs over the side of the bed, carefully folding up his shades and slipping them into his fanny pack. "Aha, is dis da part where ya all up try ta kill me or whatev ya said ya were gonna do, broham~? Trust me, brotato chip, I'd LOVE ya see ya try~ <3" You could practically hear the heart at the end of the sentence.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis stares straight back at that one eye, finding himself unable to look away. That poor host... He wanted to help, he so badly wanted to help- He was meant to be the INVINCIBLE Wallis Gloom, the most powerful man in the country...
And here he was, reduced to a terrified mess in a small house in Prisma. He was meant to be able to HELP, to fix everything- but he couldn't. There was no way he could help the host, especially not right now. He actually wished Fresh had kept the shades on... Then at least he could pretend the other wasn't using an innocent person for his own gain.
His gaze quickly drifts toward the door. There was no way he was going to just lay there and let Fresh hurt- Or kill- him. Slowly, he began trying to slip his legs out of the blankets, readying himself to make a run for it. "I-I'm not.... Not going to kill you..."
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh widened his eyes slightly, staying perfectly still and watching him struggle. You could cut the tension in the air with a knife - especially because the parasite was eyeing him in the way a predator watches its weakened prey. "Whaddaya think ya gonna try ta do, Wally~? Ya ain't lookin so hot, ya dig? But I toldja, homie, it'd gimme a good laugh ta all up watch ya try!!"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis keeps his gaze trained on the parasite, hunched over slightly in a defensive position, clearly in no mood to just give in. He was reminded of the way a cat toys with a mouse before catching it- Cruel, all part of their little game... He spares a fleeting glance toward the doorway, before suddenly attempting to scramble off the bed and toward the doorway, clumsy thanks to his unfit state and more recent injuries. It was worth a try- If he was going to go down, then he was going to go down fighting.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Quick as a flash, Fresh lunged out to grab Wallis's arm, giving it a painful twist. "Ya ain't gettin away dat easy, Brahllis!!" he taunted, staring the other dead in the face with an expression of obvious enjoyment. Fresh watched for a moment more before releasing his arm and giving him a rough shove to the floor, staring down at the injured magician. "Ya still think ya all dat an a bag o chips, Wally?? Been waitin fo' dis fo' a LONG time, yo, ya ain't gonna mess it up dis time!!"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis cries out in pain at the sharp movement, being forced backward in order to not put too much pressure on his arm, taking in a few shaky gulps of air before being pushed to the ground. He lays there for a moment, head spinning from the sudden movements and pain, before once again trying to push himself up- Stubborn man. Maybe running wouldn't work...
He turns to glare at Fresh over his shoulder, feeling his heart sink as he looks up into that one terrified eye again. "You f-funking RADHOLE- What the heck are you gonna do, then!??"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh crouched down so he was roughly at Wallis's level, his hair flopping over his shoulder. "Dats da tricky part, brah!! All up way easier befo' cuz i could just make somethin sharp-like ta get it ova wit' easy as pie - but i don't think i can make some junk like dat here!! Ya got any suggestions, brotien shake?? Ain't - ain't got much experience tryin ta off peeps befo', heh." It was slight, but the parasite's voice caught on the last word and he seemed to lose some of his feigned enthusiasm.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis pauses, horror flickering more vibrantly on his face for a moment at those words. Was Fresh really asking Wallis to.... Choose his own death?!!
That was fucking sick.... He inches away again, hunching his shoulders up to protect his neck some more. Though, the question may be one of genuine uncertainty... It sounded like he'd nearly killed someone before, and at the very least, was still hesitant. Maybe he was just being wishful, but... Wait, that was it.
"Would they really want you to do this?" he mutters, eyes darkening, untrimmed fringe falling in front of them slightly. "Would they be proud of you for funking MURDERING someone??"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh froze, his expression flickering from genuine shock to fear, anger, and finally a blank mask that betrayed nothing. "What. Did you just say." He twitched for a second, his host fighting back, then appeared to regain his composure. "Care ta run dat by me again, broski?"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis juts his head up higher, emboldened by the uncertain reaction. Best case scenario, Fresh decides to leave him alone- Second best, it distracts the parasite long enough for Wallis to make an escape... Worst case, he didn't want to think about. He huffs, pushing himself up more. "How would they feel, if they knew you were torturing someone who tried to HELP you?!"
NEON--NIGHTMARE: Fresh shuddered, an unnatural, jerky movement. An odd, muted whirlwind of memories and feelings he had tried to suppress was whirling around inside his head as he stared down at Wallis, his expression completely blank and emotionless. "Ya don't know whatcha talkin bout, so ya better shut ya yap if ya know what's good fo' ya." He couldn't do this, not here not NOW this was all wrong wrong WRONG-
ZEPHYRINX:
Yes, yes yes- He could do it, he could make Fresh lose control and then he could fucking escape!! With renewed confidence he manages to get his knees beneath him again, panting a little harder. "They'd be funking DISAPPOINTED in you, Fresh!! They're probably watching right now, ashamed, because you're hurting an INNOCENT MAN-"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh got to his feet in one fluid moment and kicked him, HARD. He didn't let up either, punctuating the kicks with a repeated sentence hissed through gritted teeth - "Shut up. Dis is ova an done an ya ain't allowed ya ain't got no RIGHT shut UP-"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis absolutely wasn't expecting that, unable to react in time as the kick sends him rolling with a pained yelp, any progress he'd made in standing up lost. He manages to try and curl up into a ball to protect his head- Fuck, there was no going back now. "I-IT'S NOT- YOU KNOW IT'S NOT- THEY'RE NEVER GONNA STOP JUDGING YOU-- FUNK- YOU CAN JUST STOP--"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh's voice rose to a yelling pitch as he continued his assault in a futile attempt to get Wallis to STOP. "Shut up SHUT UP STOP TALKIN-" The usually emotionless parasite sounded almost desperate, in a way.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis suddenly tries to grab at Fresh's foot in a desperate attempt to stop him, or at least ease the harsh attack. He was already bruised and sore around his sides thanks to Cake's assault a few days prior- This was just adding ten times more pain. "PURPLE-" He chokes out, voice weak and half cut off thanks to another kick... At least Fresh seemed to be losing composure.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Caught off-guard once again, Fresh stumbled, grabbing into the bed in time to regain his balance. He was panting heavily, watching Wallis with a look in his eye of nothing less than absolute hatred. Oh, he was mad - not just mad, FURIOUS. How was it that even in a weakened, near-helpless state with the parasite holding almost every possible advantage over him, Wallis still managed to turn the odds back in his favor?? The magician should have just given in by now. Just thrown in the towel and accepted his death, or even tried to beg for his life - but instead he had managed to get Fresh to lose his composure again, and the parasite didn't even really understand why.
Continuing to persevere even when it seemed like all was lost... it almost reminded Fresh of - NO. He wasn't going to let himself go back down that path after it was all done and over with - or SHOULD have been, anyway. Why, why, WHY couldn't he escape this?? Why couldn't he understand... any of this?? Everything had been turned around, and Fresh just wanted it all to be done with already.
He continued to stare daggers at Wallis, but his posture had sagged and he seemed to have lost some of his will to fight.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis groans, struggling to push himself back, dazed and in pain from the beating his sides had just taken. He stares up at the other, eyes half lidded and vision blurry, one arm wrapped around his stomach, the other propping him up as much as it could. He maintains eye contact, watching, waiting... He could call out for help again, or he could try to slowly stand and walk to the door.... He could continue pressing, or remain silent until Fresh made the first move. So many options, and he had no idea which was the right one, or if there wven WAS a right one. Gnawing at the inside of his lip, he tried his best to catch his breath again, each intake of air just causing more pain-- Fuck, what else was the parasite capable of doing?!!
"...Just. Just leave me alone..." Wallis mutters in an attempt at false calmness, a hint of fear still evident in his voice. Maybe he could resolve things peacefully...
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh had begun staring at Wallis as if he was seeing someone else in his place, but he tore his gaze away once Wallis finished his plea. The unexpected burst of anger and terror that had been so strong earlier had vanished, leaving him... empty. Good. He knew how to deal with this, although a strong sense of exhaustion was had him in its hold as well. This had been going on for FAR too long, especially when he thought he had put it all behind him for a FRESH start - and in front of him was the source of all his problems, beaten and weak, pleading with him to just leave.
It would be EASY to... remove him from the picture right now, even if he didn't have much experience - so why was it that he couldn't bring himself to move?? This was his CHANCE to bring everything back to normal, putting an end to all the awful memories and feelings that had been following him everywhere once and for all - but the parasite didn't move. Fresh didn't reply but he slumped over a bit more, still watching Wallis with his host's pain evident in his 'normal' eye. Why did everything have to be so difficult?? He couldn't even begin to understand why.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis leans back against the bookshelf slightly, another wave of dizziness hitting him, blinking back the blurriness. He didn't trust this- Didn't trust it at ALL- he couldn't let his guard down and risk Fresh suddenly attacking him again. He was so close now, so close to finally maybe getting Fresh off his trail... Even just the thought made him want to try. It would be better to end it once and for all, than run away... Not that he really could run now. He slowly breathes out, frame shaking as he stared back at his tormentor. "I... I don't... Want this... Please..."
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh was silent for a moment longer before erupting into joyless laughter, his shoulders shaking from the force of his outburst. He leaned over to rest his head in his arms, muffled giggles still emanating from his covered mouth. After a minute or so of this, the parasite raised his head and turned to look at the other, still chuckling. "Ah hahahaha, an' ya think I do??? Rule numba one, yo, whatcha want DON'T MEAN NOTHIN if it all up gets in da way o' otha peeps wit' more power den ya. Ya think I ain't all up sick o' dis neither?? I just want things ta go back ta da way dey SHOULD be, broski!! All up back ta things dat make sense, back ta da way things all up WERE befo' everythin' went wrong!! Thought I put all dis behind me, fo' da sake o' mah own life - an' den YA showed up, always findin ways ta get in da way an' make everythin worse! How'dya do it, yo?? An' now - everythin's fallin' apart an' everythin's wrong, an' - Ah hahahaha-" The parasite just smiled at his enemy, his empty laughter cutting off -
"I don't wanna die. I ain't READY yet. An' ya like mah third strike, homie - if I don't all up prove mah worth an' just letcha go - den its game ova, an' i just up an' get replaced. Course I'm gonna fail in da end - eitha a peep I all up angered kills me off, or I all up funk somethin else up an' kick da bucket - but I ain't ready ta die yet. Not like dis. So I can't - I can't give up, ya get me?? I gotta - I don't - I just want dis ta STOP."
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis flinches back at the sudden laughter, brows knitting together in confusion. He reaches back to grab a hold of one of the lower bookcase shelves, using it to slowly try and hoist himself up, dreading the way the pain from his ribs shot through him and took his breath away. He shakily wipes some of the hair from in front of his eyes, sweating a bit from exertion and lingering effects of the arsenic. He listens in silence, Fresh's words occasionally sounding distant before returning to clarity. He understood, though. He knew what the parasite was getting at.
It was... Unfair. Even now Wallis could feel a twinge of guilt and sympathy, knowing that the other knew nothing else BUT a lack of emotion. He was hurting, whether he knew it or not- Mourning over someone he wasn't meant to mourn. Life wasn't fucking fair, sometimes... And Wallis had always been there to help. Seaweed, Assistant, Purple... He freezes when the laughter stops, the unnatural smile sending chills down his spine.
Fresh was far more dangerous than any of his family.
"It... It doesn't work like that Fresh, it doesn't HAVE to be like that," He croaks out, swallowing to try and ease his parched throat. "What you want may not mean anything to someone more powerful- But it matters to others! And nobody is better than anyone else, we're all- We're all equal. I don't mean to make your life hard, I really fucking don't, I'm just... Trying to survive. Yeah, maybe I overreacted when we first met, I'll admit that. It's hard to drop an act when you've lived it for years. And I'm- I'm sorry, okay??! And anyway, you aren't happy how you are- You NEED to make a change!!" He pauses to take a few deep breaths, managing to stand hunched over, leaning heavily against the bookcase with shaking legs. "That's no way to live, and- Fuck, just let me help you, I can try to help if you'll just give me a chance!!"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh gave a derisive snort at the first part, but froze immediately once Wallis stood up. "...Back off, yo. Ya wanna get all up tough an' cocky now, brah?? Ya - Ya want me ta change ta be like YA cuz I ain't happy??? I've NEVER been happy, yo, dat don't mean nothin!! Ya still up an' foolin' yaself dat I NEED help - da only thing dat would HELP is ya bein GONE FO' GOOD. An' den everythin' can - can go back ta da way it SHOULD be, befo' everythin went WRONG an' befo' da kid..." His voice trailed off and his smile slipped again for a moment, before he forced the grin back on his face and strode over to Wallis.
The parasite looked him dead in the eyes, the soul in his left eye noticeably more cracked than when he had first walked in. "What kinda change d'ya suggest, Brahllis~? All up changin' from bein' alive ta bein' DEAD??"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis presses himself back against the bookcase, legs nearly slipping from under him in his haste, unable to look away from the damaged soul in the poor host's eye. His own facial features softened for a moment, as he processed what Fresh had just implied-
"...They were a kid?" He murmurs, shock and horror lacing his tone. He'd never considered... Never REALISED that the person Fresh had lost may have been young. May have been very young... Kids weren't meant to die. "Fresh.... The world isn't that bad, I'm sorry you had to go through such awful things, but- You're only young. You haven't seen much, and you've still got time to... To change yourself, I know you can change, you just need to try looking your fear head on...." His gaze shifts between the cracked soul of eye and the horrified pupil of the other, wondering just how much pain the host was in right now. Fresh looked like he was struggling... He wished he could speak out and apologise to the host, but it wasn't the right time. Not now. He couldn't save them yet...
Without thinking, he automatically shifts forward slightly, reaching out to put his hand on Fresh's arm for 'comfort' like he would with anyone else. "I can help..."
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh actually growled, forcefully grabbing the hand Wallis had put on his arm and shoving it aside. "Just GIVE IT UP ALREADY, AIGHT??" he hissed, anger like he hadn't felt for a LONG time gripping him. "Stop talkin' like dem!! Stop it stop it ya ain't FUNNY dis ain't funny no more CUT IT OUT-" The parasite's whole body shuddered, overwhelmed by the unexpected burst of fury churning inside him.
"Ya keep doin dis but ya AIN'T dem an' why wouldja I toldja I was on ta ya ya ain't breakin' me here I ain't lettin' ya make me lose control WHAT ARE YA TRYIN TA DO TA ME-" Fresh let the words spill out in a big jumbled mess before his voice gave out and he just stood there, breathing heavily. He looked... broken, desperate, looking down at the other. "...Kill 'em wit' kindness, right, Wally??"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis flinches back and holds his arm to his chest, shrinking back against the bookcase slightly. How the fuck hadn't Purple heard everything that was happening?!! He glances toward the door again, blinking to try and clear some of the darkness in his damaged eye, before quickly returning his gaze to Fresh. He winces at the parasite's tone, closing his eyes and hunching his shoulders up when those words rose in volume, awaiting some kind of attack- Wallis hesitantly opened them again, meeting Fresh's gaze.
"...I'm not... Trying to be them. I'm not, I promise- I don't know why you think kindness is exclusive to them- Why you think that nobody apart from one person in the entire world would want to help you... But it's not true. There are people that can understand, and help-- I'm just... Just trying to help," His voice wavers. "...Just because you hurt me doesn't mean I can't show you mercy."
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh's eyes widened and he took a jerky step back, looking as if he had seen a ghost. "Ya - ya say ya wanna -" He stumbled backwards and sat down hard on the bed, not taking his eyes off the injured magician once. "...Why??"
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis doesn't move, though, the door looked pretty tempting... But he was finally getting through, and Fresh's stare seemed to keep him locked in place. He sees at a loss for words for a few moments, shaking his head slightly and hugging himself with one arm, the other used to steady himself against the bookcase. "l...I don't know," He mutters, quiet. "I guess it was just how I was raised... To give people a chance. To see everyone equally. To.... Help. I grew up with people who were treated like shit their whole lives just because they were different- Nobody deserves that."
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh didn't react immediately to that, before he started chucking hoarsely. "Ah hahaha... ha... Dis... hurts. Why does it hurt??" He put his head in his hands, rubbed his eyes, and looked back up at Wallis. "I... don't get it. Dunno if I even CAN, ahaha - Ya sound so much like 'em, and I - CAN'T think bout 'em no more else everythin all up starts crumblin' again - I ain't allowed. I ain't allowed I ain't ready ta die ain't dyin here can't THINK-" The parasite's voice broke, and he stared at Wallis in silence with hollow eyes and an empty grin.
ZEPHYRINX:
"...I can't die either," He mutters back, leaning more heavily against the furniture behind him. He was feeling so lightheaded, body screaming at him to lay down and rest. "I have.... I have family.... I have a brother... My mom... My best friends, and my boyfriend.... You... You can't just take me away from them," He stares back, trying to ignore how unnerving that look was. "...You can't."
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
The parasite shakily got to his feet and walked back over to the other in mechanical, unnatural movements, his heelies audibly dragging across the floor. "...What does dat matter, yo? Peeps all up get ova it, ahaha, don't dey?? Is dat s'pposed ta... heh. Ya can all up get replaced an' nobody'll miss ya or tell da difference, yanno?" Fresh ground to a halt a few paces away from Wallis, still looking at him with an empty gaze.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis' breath hitches as Fresh takes his sweet time approaching him, once again sparing a glance at the door, his chance at freedom. The damn parasite was so unpredictable... At least now he was actually acting like he was MEANT to. Empty, mechanical, without the bombastic flair that he usually acted out. This... This was what was underneath all of that, right? This was what wanted him dead... The lingo combined with that dull look was jarring, and probably more than a habit if anything... It just didn't match up.
Wallis swallows hard, blinking back at Fresh. "...Is that how you feel?" He asks, slow and deliberate. "Like nobody would care if you disappeared?"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
"Yo, I can't FEEL nothin-" Fresh said in a mechanical, flat monotone, before pausing after realizing that wasn't exactly true anymore. "All I've all up eva felt is all up fear an' anger, heh. Da rest o' dat junk - I just play out by watchin ya peeps, ya get me? An' from what I seen - dunno why ya peeps're so proud o' havin' 'em. Think ya'd all be jumpin at da chance ta be rid o' 'em, an' some o' ya do, but da othas-" He shuddered again, still staring the other dead in the face with an empty expression. He still hadn't answered the question at hand, instead letting the silence stretch across the space between them for a minute more.
"Look, brah, ya ain't gonna be rid o' me dat easy. Even if ya break me like ya want, da peeps on da higher-up'll just make anotha, better me, one dat's - dat's better at da job an' listens ta orders. Could be comin' any day now, fo' all I know - I seen 'em, heh. Know dey runnin' round already, even if dey haven't all up stopped by fo' a reminder in a while - so yo, I don't think I'll all up end up disappearin' ta be replaced - I KNOW it, ya get me? All I can do is try ta stay alive long as possible, but odds are I don't got much time-" The parasite went quiet once more, looking as if he was struggling to speak.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis falls silent, studying, thinking. Fresh never said no.
He resists the urge to cough, another wave of dizziness hitting him harder than before causing him to hunch over just slightly, hissing under his breath. He didn't understand exactly what Fresh meant- Honestly, nothing about the parasite seemed to ever make sense- But his words definitely weren't comforting.
"L-Look, I'm not gonna pretend that I know what you're talking about- I don't, I have no idea, and I don't know... How to help... But I can fucking try, okay?! How do you know if you don't at least try!? You can't keep running from your emotions, it'll only hurt more in the long run--" He reaches out again to try and touch the other's arm. "You need to just... Let yourself FEEL and stop jumping to conclusions, Fresh-!!"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh took a stumbling step away from Wallis, looking like a cornered animal. "No no no stop YA TRYIN TA GET ME KILLED SHUT UP-" the parasite hissed in a voice thick with panic, so different from his empty monotone just a moment ago. Yet again, Wallis had ruined EVERYTHING for him, and now he felt like the walls were closing in on him. He might have tried to attack again if he could bring himself to go any nearer, but at that moment all he knew was that he couldn't bear to keep hearing THIS, couldn't keep listening to the words so similar to what THEY had said back when they were still alive, couldn't handle the thought that it might be the TRUTH - he couldn't die couldn't take any more strikes couldn't mess up again they wouldn't be happy with this and it would be EASY to just off his enemy now but he couldn't do it why couldn't he move everything was falling apart - Fresh shook his head hard to try and clear away the awful racing thoughts, his eyes flicking back to the door.
The parasite opened his mouth again, but nothing came out - so he just stood there, tremors racking his stolen body. It would be a miracle if he lasted a week after this.
ZEPHYRINX:
"Fresh, for fuck's sake," Wallis takes a tiny shuffling step towards him, swaying slightly. "I'm not trying to get you killed, I WOULDN'T try to get anyone killed, I'm not- I'm not a fucking psychopath like CAKE made me out to be!! She's not okay, Fresh!! She needs HELP," Wallis sucks in a deep breath to steady himself. "She doesn't even fucking KNOW ME--"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh took another step back, reaching towards his fanny pack with an unsteady hand. "Ya can't fool me, yo, dats how ya ALL are!! Dat's how dis all is - dog-eat-dog's da sayin, ain't it?? Ya gotta all up manipulate peeps an' use 'em fo' ya own benefit ta SURVIVE - tell 'em what dey wanna hear or all up exploitin' weaknesses an' bailin afta ya done wit' em!! Dat's how e - almost everybody is, ah haha, an' ya ain't no exception. Da exceptions all up DIE cuz dey too trustin' - can't take da heat an' dey BURN. Dat's how ALL dese places are, aight?? An' dats whatcha doin- all up usin mah... mistakes against me." Fresh's voice caught on the word mistake, and he shuddered before forcing an artificial grin back on his face.
"Friendship - ah hahaha, don't make me laugh!! Peeps like ya an' Cake Slice all up keep sayin how ya can putcha trust in peeps an' dey do da same fo' ya - dats da real JOKE, ahaha!! Cake Slice was SO EASY ta get ta, ya know dat?? Just tell 'em what dey wanna hear, an' dey come runnin'-" The parasite started chuckling hoarsely again, even though everything about his manner just seemed... unnatural and forced, as if he was desperately trying to keep up his facade of having control.
ZEPHYRINX:
"It's not, but I don't know how to convince you otherwise," Wallis mutters. "And it's hard to trust, I fucking know it is, because I struggle with it too- You're not... ALONE in this, but you can't keep running away from it all, because it WILL catch up eventually!! We BOTH know that!! And I understand the fear of being replaced- Do you have any fucking idea how easy it would be for another star to replace me!?! To come along with weirder magic, or a nicer face, and just throw me under the fucking bus?!! I need to be PERFECT or my career will DIE- Or someone BETTER THAN ME will TAKE MY PLACE!!"
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
The parasite definitely wasn't expecting that and didn't quite know how to respond, watching the other warily. "It - course dis'll catch up ta me in da long run, heh - made too many peeps totes mad ta escape 'em foreva!! But dat don't got nothin ta do wit dis now, ya dig?? Dat don't... An' dere ain't no peeps ta gotta hide from here dat can off me 'sides Redical, an' she ain't all up lookin all da time no more, yeah?? I dunno whatcha point is, ahaha~" He looked like he was making a noticeable attempt to pull himself together, putting up a broken approximation of his usual act.
ZEPHYRINX:
"Fresh, please," Wallis whispers, sinking down a bit more with a hitch in his breathing. "....Leave me alone. Leave my family alone, leave my friends alone... Y-You. You'd fucking... KNOW what it's like to lose someone you love. You wouldn't want someone else to go through that... Would you!?? The pain, the agony, the.... You understand, right?? Just.... Just leave," He almost pleads, still trying to keep a strong tone to his voice... It was now or never. He sucks in a deeper breath, suddenly trying to push forward and past Fresh, aiming for neither the door nor the bed.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh just... allowed Wallis to push past, all the will to fight leaving him as he sank back down to the floor and rubbed his eyes with his palms. He knew what they would want was to fight back and get the job done, show none of this affected him, show it was all in the past like he said. Everything would go back to the way it SHOULD be if he could just follow orders and do what he was SUPPOSED to, what he KNEW they would want him to do... but the parasite couldn't muster the energy to move, caught up in all the memories of past events he wished he could forget. This... wasn't supposed to happen. Not again.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis... Wasn't expecting the ease with which he could push past, pausing mid-stride and standing almost back to back with the parasite... Before glancing back, that familiar swell of pity filling his chest, causing him to fall to his knees too, grateful for the rest. He watches Fresh through one eye, head throbbing from the exposed cut and an oncoming migraine,not really sure what to do or say... He just reaches out from behind, to put his hand on Fresh's shoulder in what he hoped was a comforting manner.
Seaweed always said he was too kind for his own good.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh didn't react at all to the supportive motion at first, or even seem to notice - but he relaxed slightly after a moment, an almost subconscious response to the touch. The parasite seemed... drained, as if he couldn't move if he tried. Logically, Fresh knew he needed to pull himself together and fast. The less weaknesses he showed in front of his enemy, the better - and he could barely deal with the faint resistance his host was still putting up. It seemed almost cruel - whenever he thought he was past all this... garbage, it would always come back and hit him when he least expected it. Fresh made an indistinct sound in his throat, curling in on himself a bit more. He needed to get ahold of himself before it was too late.
ZEPHYRINX:
Finding little to no resistance, he squeezes slightly, shuffling a bit closer and slumping forward just a touch as another wave of dizziness smacked into him from behind... he really did not feel well. "...Sorry."
He wanted this to be over. Yes, he was doing this half selfishly- But seeing the other in pain really was making Wallis want to help... It was just in his nature and upbringing to give chances to the less fortunate, and Fresh seemed pretty damn unfortunate. His entire existence was just... sad. But he wanted it over with fast- He was so tired...
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Upon hearing the other's weak voice, Fresh snapped back to reality and the situation he was in, jolting and looking around wildly. He was... Wallis was right next to him, treating him like a friend??? This wasn't RIGHT, what was the magician playing at?? Was he really just sitting there and letting Wallis take advantage of him like that?? What... What was he doing?? This didn't make sense this was WRONG - they weren't going to be happy with him if he didn't find a way to fix this RIGHT NOW. The parasite spun around and lashed out at Wallis in the span of a second, hitting him hard on the head.
ZEPHYRINX:
Wallis only realised a split second too late what the parasite was doing, only able to wince and try to jerk back in the tiny time frame he was given. He was unsuccessful, letting out a small noise of shocked pain as the attack connected, sending him reeling- He slumps backwards, head also knocking into the ground with a painful thud, vision swimming for a second as he struggled to stay conscious. There wasn't much he could to to fight it, though, especially when he was already so injured... It didn't take long at all for him to black out.
NEON--NIGHTMARE:
Fresh slowly got to his feet and looked down at his unconscious opponent, lost in thought. They... They would want him to kill Wallis now, wouldn't they?? Prove once and for all that he was above this and wouldn't get dragged back down, while simultaneously making sure the stubborn magician would never cause any problems again. That was what they would want, but... watching Wallis lay on the ground, most likely out cold - the parasite found he couldn't bring himself to do the deed. He really wasn't a killer, despite how he tended to act to the contrary - it made for good intimidation, after all. Besides, Wallis was probably done with anyways, right?? He would give up after this, realizing he would only get himself hurt, and Fresh could find another plan without dealing with his interference! ...Right?? That was the logical thing to do, after all.
Saving your own skin instead of doing... whatever Wallis had been doing. Of course, Wallis wasn't a threat to him anymore. No need to off him if it wasn't absolutely necessary. Even with all the complications, this was a SUCCESS! He showed he won over his STUPID memories in order to get the job done, and he could just say he had been trying to get close to Wallis so he could strike!!
Never mind that if they truly had been watching - which they probably were - they would have seen all the opportunities he had let by beforehand before finally putting an end to it. Fresh took another step away from the mostly unmoving body, turning his gaze to the ceiling. "Yo, uh..." the parasite croaked out before stopping to clear his threat and try again.
"Yo, ya were all up watchin dis, yeah?? Uh, heh - Did I all up prove mahself now, brahs?? Didn't let none o dat emotional garbage junk hold me back in da end, yanno? All up got dis in da BAG like always!! Just wanted ta... mess wit' Wally a bit, ya know?? Let 'im think he got ta me an' all dat befo' takin' 'im out - dats all, dawgs, ain't no biggie!! See, yo?? I ain't - I ain't strayin, yo!! All up stayin on da straight an' narrow as always, no need ta all up send anotha - anotha reminder or nothin, I all up got dis mahself!! Ya... Ya hearin dis, brahs?? I totes GOT dis an' I ain't lettin nothin hold me down no more!! Da Fresh is BACK AGAIN, yo, an' I ain't..." His voice trailed off again, and he rested his head in his palms for a moment before sparing another nervous glance at the ceiling.
"...Ya listenin', right? Ya know ya don't gotta... Ya probs ain't happy, I get dat. Dats - all up aight, yo!! Cuz I can all up PROVE I got dis when I take ova dis place, ya dig?? Wally ain't gonna cause no more probs - I promise ya dat, ah haha!!" Fresh managed to choke out a faint laugh before remembering where he was once more. The parasite began pulling his shades back out to slip them back on, only sparing a quick glance at his defeated foe before spinning around and striding out of the house (making an effort to be more quiet than he usually was, no point in making it this far and getting caught now).
The parasite gently closed the still-unlocked door behind him before spinning around and walking off into the night, his blanket fanning out behind him.
#gloomverse#fresh#lucidia#roleplay#writing#wallis gloom#neon--nightmare#....i'm very shy abt my roleplaying but this is in Demand(tm) so#please be nice!!
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