#like chiron KNOWS the weight of a promise on the styx and he STILL makes her swear anyway?????

[bikananjarrus]

absolutely INSANE that in SoM chiron makes annabeth swear on the styx to look after percy, and invokes the great prophecy when he asks her like???? chiron what the fuck.

you can't tell me annabeth didn't think of this promise constantly over the next three years. she's read the great prophecy. she, chiron, and everyone else is expecting the prophesized big three child to die. and still, she promises to stay with percy. even if she knows, ultimately, that she can't keep him safe. she promises to stay and to try.

think about how devastated she felt in botl when she thought she’d lost him after mt st. helens, even before the great prophecy came true (she thought she had more time with him). she didn't stay with him (because he told her to go) and she thought he'd died because of it. she promised to keep him safe and she couldn't.

by some miracle, he came back to her, only for her to probably spend the next year dreading his sixteenth birthday, thinking she was going to lose him again. she thinks he's destined by prophecy to die, and she's destined to break her sacred promise on the styx to protect him. anyway.. chewing glass about it.

[pjoseries]

“i bear it so they won’t have to” + curse of achilles percy

oh this one’s a doozy, thank u emma 😋

(TLO AU)

══════════════════

Percy doesn’t know how he didn’t notice it—the bloodlust. It starts out as a whisper, a simple low hum drifting across the nape of his neck. It crawls in his ear and settles inside his brain and every time he uncaps Riptide, a single persistent thought crosses his mind: Show no mercy.

And he doesn’t. Not when a hoard of monsters comes barrelling through their ranks. Not when he sees the other campers on their feet, but flagging, exhaustion bogging them down as monster after monster charges at them. Percy holds his own on the front lines, raising his voice to be heard, “Fall back!”

He repeats it again for good measure and the piercing, confused stares from them quickly fade as he gains the attention of every monster in his vicinity. A grin slides across his face and he gives Riptide a twirl. 

“How many of you do I have to kill before you get with the program,” Percy taunts. He lets one of them come close enough to sink their claws into his skin, but it just slides right off, ripping through his shirt instead. 

The monster gapes for a moment and attempts to slice through him again, but Percy just tsks and tilts his head. “Nice try, but no dice, man.”

He impales the monster in a quick movement, leaving him in a shower of dust. He grimaces and looks at the others. They march towards him, but Percy doesn’t even think. He blocks and jabs and slices his way through the dust and the dirt and he feels nothing. The curse really works. 

He doesn’t know how long it takes to slay the last monster. He just knows that at the end, he’s drenched in monster dust and sweat. Percy finally rolls his shoulders, taking in the damage. The borders are safe for now. He spots a few campers a ways away limping and handing each other ambrosia. Footsteps come towards him and he whirls and points Riptide at empty air. 

It takes him a moment, but even that’s too long, before he lowers his sword. It’s Annabeth, of course. He furrows his brows. He knows it’s her. She wipes the sweat off her forehead and tucks her cap into her back pocket. 

“Percy, what was that?” she asks, gray eyes glinting in the afternoon light. 

“I, uh,” he says, pocketing Riptide back into his jeans. “I’ll tell you later. We have to check on—”

Annabeth stomps towards him and grips his arm. Logically, he knows how tight of a grip it is, but it’s weird that it doesn’t even sting. “Did you… gods, you didn’t. That trip with Nico… Percy, that is stupidly dangerous.”

She knows. Of course, she figures it out. Percy’s just a fool for thinking he could have broken the news to her later. 

“I did what I had to do.” Percy grits his teeth and steps back.  

She tugs him closer. “You could’ve died.” 

Percy makes the mistake of looking into her eyes again, shiny with unshed tears and he falters. He can’t stand to see her cry. He musters up a wry smile and shrugs. “I’m here, though.”

He tells her nothing of what he saw as he made his way out of the River Styx, doesn’t say a single word about how the first time he ever felt like he would drown that her voice was the only thing he grabbed onto. All he does is loosen her grip with his free hand and gives it a small squeeze. 

“I’ll tell you more about it later, okay?” Her hand is warm and callused from training and it takes him a few seconds to remember he has something to say. “We need to go to the Big House.”

Annabeth just nods and he lingers for a moment before he lets go. As they make their way to Chiron, their hands brush and all thoughts of the fight vanish from his mind. 

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

It’s on the bridge when he gets an inkling that something is wrong, not with the curse or with the battle itself, but him. It’s similar to the last fight, Percy yelling at the Apollo campers to retreat, but the last of the monsters are dead. All that remain is Kronos himself and his demigod army. 

He slows himself down, aiming to knock them off their skeletal horses and send them running, not maim. Their swords bounce off his skin harmlessly and Percy vaguely notes that he’s ruining his already low supply of shirts. 

The voice is louder now, but still the same. Persistent as a tic: Show no mercy. 

Shut up, he wants to bite back, but he already looks insane just charging through a swarm of demigods and coming out completely unscathed. They make their way almost to the middle of the bridge when Percy freezes, like a lightning bolt just jolts through his body. Then: Annabeth screams. 

“Annabeth!” he yells and turns. A guy stands over her, his knife bloodied and dripping. Percy sees red and the voice persists louder again and he’s almost tempted to take its advice if it isn’t for Annabeth’s weak gasps. 

Percy would’ve died, if not for Annabeth and Annabeth’s dying because of him. Because he’s too damn focused on that stupid voice in his head that makes him want to tear the bridge apart and everyone in it. She doesn’t even know that’s his weak spot. 

He locks eyes with the demigod—Ethan, his mind supplies—and stalks towards him. In a beat, Percy slams his sword hilt into his face and feels a bitter sense of satisfaction as he grunts out in pain and moves away. A couple of other demigods try to come closer, but he swings Riptide as a warning. 

“Get back!” he growls. “No one touches her.”

Kronos merely hums. “Interesting.”

Percy just scowls and steps closer to Annabeth. Suddenly Achilles words come back to him: The heel is only my physical weakness, demigod. He was dumb enough to ignore Achilles’ warnings and now his weakness is staring him right in the face, her face turning ashy as her breaths weakening. Annabeth. His tie to the mortal world. He should’ve known. Maybe somewhere in the back of his mind, he always knew, but the war took precedence. Now look where it got him. 

She’s dying and he’s surrounded by enemies. 

“Bravely fought, Perseus Jackson,” Kronos says. “But it’s time to surrender, or she’ll die.”

Annabeth sits up and groans. “Don’t.”

Percy clenches his jaw and bites back the panic at the sight. Her shirt is soaked in blood and he has to get her to a healer. His mind swirls for an escape route and, in a second, he yells out, “Blackjack!”

The pegasus swoops and carries her out and away from any immediate danger. Percy’s glad he knows what to do because he doesn’t have any time to explain. Luke—Kronos’ face twists. 

Percy meets the scythe with Riptide. 

Then their battle begins. And for once, Percy lets the voice in his mind take over. 

Show no mercy.

Percy smiles. He won’t. 

━━━━━━━━━▼━━━━━━━━━

The voice stays with him, long after the war ends. Despite how many hours he’s clocking in that affects his sleeping schedule, or the lack of one, he notices that he’s itching for a fight. 

It makes no sense. He wants to rest, but the voice tells him he has the curse for a reason. What use is he to his friends, to his family if he lets them go off on dangerous quests to get injured or worse? A couple of extra more hours of sleep is a petty consequence when it means saving everyone the trouble of getting hurt. 

So despite Annabeth’s warnings, he volunteers to guard the fleece, or to head training, or to do any of the more dangerous missions. There’s an undisputed agreement amongst the campers that they’ll let Percy do whatever he wants which is kind of weird but it works in his favor, so he’ll take it. Well, unless their names are Annabeth and Grover, that is.

But after this one quest—if he can even call it that, maybe just a favor for his father—Percy lands back on the shore, sitting with his knees tucked to his chest. His hands tremble as they flex over his own legs. The water rushes to his ankles, an attempt to calm him down but he just flinches. It just makes things worse. 

Percy’s no better than the monsters he fights. 

He wonders if monsters never exploded into dust, if they bleed like he does. He wonders how much blood he’s spilled, how much it stains his hands, his heart, his soul.

“Percy?” Annabeth says quietly. She pads over to him, settling down right next to him. The water drenches her shoes, but she just places a warm hand on his. “Percy, hey. Are you… okay?”

Her tone is awkward, but there’s an earnestness to it that makes him soften slightly. So he lifts his shoulder in response and stares out into the water. 

“You don’t have to do this, you know.”

Percy clears his throat. “Do what?”

“Go on all these quests. Try to save everyone. The war’s over, Percy. You can just enjoy camp like everyone else, too. You don’t have to do everything. You’re not Atlas.”

“Annabeth, this curse… I have a responsibility. Why let everyone else get hurt if I can do it? They’re just kids.” Percy unfolds his legs and lets Annabeth’s weight ground him. It’s like the voice gets muffled when she’s near. “And besides, I bear it so they won’t have to.”

Annabeth’s fingers find his cheek and he crumbles under her touch. He turns and Annabeth has this expression on her face that he can’t parse out. He closes his eyes and lets her smooth out the wrinkle between his brows, lets her trace a swooping pattern on his cheek. “You’re sixteen, Percy, not sixty-five. You have to let yourself take a break, Percy. The others need to know how to survive out there without you. You’re not always gonna be there to protect them. You’re gonna run yourself to the ground and I’d like to see my boyfriend awake once in a while.”

“Guess my eyes have to be open for that.” Percy smiles into her fingertips and blinks exaggeratedly at her. She giggles and it sends warmth all the way down to his belly. She stands up and brushes off the sand from pants before she holds out her hand. 

Golden light shines behind her, circling her like a halo. He’s suddenly reminded of his dip in the Styx, the way dream-Annabeth held in her laughter as she grabbed his hand and pulled him up. Real-Annabeth wiggles her fingers and he lets her haul him up. 

“Promise you’ll take it easy?” she asks. 

And his answer is an easy one. He kisses the side of her head. “Promise.”

Then they walk back to camp, their hands swinging between them. 

[flightfoot]

Delos Days Ch. 7-END

Thanks to @grace--the-fangirl for betaing!

Day 6

Apollo’s POV

I’m falling, falling, panicking - Why am I falling? Why can’t I fly? - and land roughly on some garbage, knocking the wind out of me. My ribs feel bruised, maybe even broken. I feel ashamed and raw, but I don’t know why. It’s weird, like I should know what’s going on, why I feel like this, but I don’t. But it seems so familiar…

YOUR FAULT. YOUR PUNISHMENT.

The words boom through my mind. I know this voice. That scary man, that mean man, the one who used to hurt me, who hurt Meg! That was his voice! I want to scream. I want to flee. I want that voice to go away to somewhere else, somewhere it can’t hurt me or the people I care about.

But I don’t do any of those things.

Instead, as YOUR FAULT tears through my head again, I hear myself say “No! No it wasn’t!”

Huh?

Why is my body doing things I haven’t told it to do?

This all seems very familiar…

The world jolts, and I’m on the ground, being kicked and beaten by some guys. Why?! What did I do to deserve this, to deserve being kicked and being hit with garbage, to deserve hearing the cracking sound as my ribs (DEFINITELY broken at this point) give in?!  I black out, only to be forced into consciousness again as I throw up.

You’ve done so many things to deserve this. Don’t you remember all the people that have been endangered, suffered, that died because of you?

A whisper echoes from the back of my mind. It sounds like me.

I don’t know what it’s talking about - what I’m talking about? - but a heavy weight falls into my stomach anyway. It sounds like the truth. I deserve this.

*flash*

I’m standing up now, heavily injured, but alive. My tormentors are nowhere to be seen. Instead a young girl stands in front of me, the rhinestones on her glasses glittering in the light.

Meg!

My protector!

Maybe I deserve their punishment. But I know she’d disagree.

The thought fills me with hope.

More flashes. This time more rapid, only fleeting glimpses.

A raven-haired teenager with sea-green eyes (the name “Percy” springs to mind) opening the door, looking annoyed.

Meg walking out in her oh-so-loved, oh-so-important green dress.

A peach baby biting the heads off some nasty spirits.

Meg trying to drag me through some woods, my young protector struggling so hard to help.

A longer scene emerges.

A young man with golden hair and blue eyes looms above me.

Will.

His name is Will.

He’s my son.

I frown. What was that? Who is Will to me? I know I had it!

I’m Will’s father.

I can’t figure it out. It’s there, but muffled.

I try one last time to recall. He’s important to me! Will’s my son child family.

Yes. That last time I could recall it! I know I’m missing some things, but he is my family. I’m certain of that!

I suppose that’ll have to be enough for now.

Two more enter. They appear slightly younger. One with dark skin and woven cornrows, the other a young girl with ginger hair dyed with a touch of green.

Immediately I felt like I should know them, my son and daughter, my children, but the only word that stuck was “family”.

They are my family.

Tears well up in my eyes.

They’re here because they care for me. Because they love me. Because they think I’m worth it, despite all evidence to the contrary.

I can’t let them down.

More flashes, more scenes.

My children family sitting with me at a table, reassuring me that they’ll help me, protect me. Before I can break down sobbing, the scene changes again. I wish it didn’t. No, please, I want to be with them some more! I think. But it’s no use.  The scene is gone, and my memory of it fades as a new present takes its place.

I’m frustrated and miserable. Useless at skills I was once the god of. I make a rash vow, a foolish vow; no wait please don’t do this don’t promise this   i f   o n l y   I   h a d n ’ t   p r o m i s e d -

“I swear upon the River Styx - until I am a god again, I will not use a bow or a musical instrument!”

The world appeared to freeze. I knew I just did something terrible, something foolish, something that would cause death to the people I care about, though I didn’t know who those people were.

I rocket ahead. Chiron stands in front of me, looking grim.

“I fear one more team is still missing… your children, Kayla and Austin.”

My stomach twists into knots. They are gone because of me. I know they are. Because they tried to protect me.

I have to find them. To get them back. They have to live. They HAVE to. I will save them, no matter what. I owe them that at least.

More images, more pain, more evidence of my failures.

Meg being carried off by a myrmekes, because she had distracted the myrmekes from me. Stumbling towards the ant who has her, only to fall and vomit, unable to move. Gone because I had been stupid enough to swear on the Styx. Gone because of me. Another person dead because of me.

No.

She’s not dead.

I know she’s not!

This time I willingly push forwards through time. I know that can’t be the end for her, I know it!

I’m running back through the tunnels, bow and quiver slung over my shoulders. And I sing.

Memories crash back through me. Daphne slowly turning to wood, Hyacinthus’s eyes glazing over as he falls onto the ground, dead.

I had forgotten them again.

The pain of their deaths, of my failures, of my inability to even properly honor them by REMEMBERING them, crashes over me, crashes through me.

I sing out my pain, I beg for forgiveness. The myrmekes stand down, overcome by my grief.

But at least I won’t lose another precious person here.

Meg is ahead of me, constrained, but alive. This time, I wasn’t too late. This time, I did not fail.

My relief does not last long.

Meg is now beside me as we face off against a man, an evil man. I know, somewhere in the back of my mind, that this man has caused her untold pain, has hurt her in ways that will take a long time to heal, if they ever do.

Something tickles in the back of my mind.

A realization. One that feels familiar, but I was sure I hadn’t had before now.

This man - he was like that evil man, that awful man, that one who promised pain.

A man that should have protected Meg, like that evil, awful man should have protected me, because both of them are our fathers.

This time I didn’t push to remember. I didn’t want to remember him. He didn’t deserve it.

More jolting.

Trees burn around me. Several young demigods (and one geyser spirit), including Kayla and Austin, are tied up, unconscious and helpless as the flames inch closer. I CANNOT let them die. I WILL NOT. I pick them up, one by one, and drag them away. But it’s not enough. I only bought them minutes. They’ll burn too. I can’t save them. I can’t save myself. I need help. But who could help me? I’m alone. By myself, without my powers, I’m useless. I can’t save my precious people as a god, why would I think I stood a chance as a mortal?

I call for help, not expecting any.

My call is answered.

Dryads appear out of the trees, the beautiful nymphs marching resolutely towards the fire, faces placid, their fates decided. They quench the fire, but at a cost. The fire sears their skin, turning it black and hard (like how Daphne’s had turned to bark, like how her skin had turned dark and unyielding) until they crumbled away.

More dead because of me.

But somehow I always survived.

It doesn’t seem fair, that so many die so I can live.

I don’t deserve it.

I turn towards the hostages. My grief and guilt would have to wait. The demigods are depending on me. I have to try to help.

Small surge forwards, only by a few minutes.

Meg and I are in a grove of whispering trees. She’s backing away, saying that she needs to go back to the evil man, the Beast. She calls him something else, says that he’s not the Beast, tries to convince herself that he’s not as bad as he appears.

My heart breaks. The Beast has twisted her so far, has his claws in so deep, that he’s gotten Meg to do some of the work FOR him, to convince HERSELF that he can be reasoned with, if only she goes back to him. That it’s her fault for angering the Beast, that anything bad he was going to do, was because of her.

Absolving himself of any responsibility for his actions.

Something starts tingling in the back of my head again, a sense of familiarity. I ignore it. It He doesn’t deserve my attention or remembrance.

Meg runs away, back to her abuser. I wish I could help her, keep her away from her abuser. But I can’t catch her. She disappears, leaving an ache in my heart.

I will find her again. I will free her from her stepfather’s clutches. She protected me. It’s time I protect her.

I skip forward, in flashes again, instead of the small jolts I’d been experiencing.

*flash*

Myself crying over my son, relieved that he’s okay.

*flash*

Singing to the ants again, but this time trying to befriend them, instead of merely calm them.

*flash*

A giant golden statue of myself, buck-naked, running around squashing things (This one takes me aback for a moment).

*flash*

The battle’s over. The Demeter cabin is destroyed. The camp’s in disarray, many demigods sick or injured. But no one’s dead.

The campers are all alive and the injured and sick will make full recoveries.

If I leave, hopefully they’ll stay that way.

But I don’t want to. My family… Will, Kayla, and Austin… I want to stay with them. I want to be with them. I want to be there for them.

But I can’t endanger them anymore.

My feet don’t move. Even now, I’m still selfish and fearful. I can’t make myself leave, make myself go out on my own. I can’t do this by myself. I need friends. I just… I don’t want to be alone. Even though that’s safest for everyone around me. I can’t be alone. Please, don’t leave me alone.

Another flash forward, this one longer than all the previous ones.

I’m with a beautiful young woman, yet instead of feeling flirtatious, my stomach knots up. I’m responsible for something bad happening to her, an injustice she didn’t deserve. And I didn’t care until now. Why didn’t I care?

I can’t remember what I did. But knowing that in some way I had harmed her… I didn’t deserve her help. Yet she was helping me anyway. I am amazed that she wants to be around me.

We’re facing off against a young man holding a sword. He was a handsome young man, though his features were marred by many, many large scars across his face.

He’s trying to kill me. I’m about to die.

So why do I feel hopeful? Like I’m anticipating something.

Then a small girl drops in front of me. Meg!

She’shereshe’shereshe’sOKAYandshewantstohelpme

She holds him off, yelling at me to go, that she’ll hold him off. I can’t leave her. She’ll die. Yet I don’t have a choice. Try as I might, my legs walk me away from her, towards some griffins. My stomach turns. Something bad happens to these griffins. But now is not the time. My young protector is in danger. I WILL NOT allow her to die.

I hop onto one of the griffins, my female companion getting on board the other one. We fly them towards Meg and the swordsman. Thankfully, Meg’s order only applies to me, not what (or rather who) I’m riding. I hoist her up onto my griffin as we fly by. She turns to me and exclaims “You were supposed to go!” before wrapping her arms around me, sobbing into my shirt.

At least I’ve been able to do something right. I saved her. She didn’t die.

*flash*

It’s chaos around me. Ostriches running around, myself riding an elephant, Sis’s Hunters fighting. And then there’s the Emperor.

He looks exquisite in his fine purple robes, though he could’ve been naked and he would’ve been just as handsome (as I can attest).

My focus is not on him however (mostly); it’s on the young man he’s holding. Lit. His name is Lit. The man who tried to kill me and my friends earlier. Yet I can’t stand to see him die now. Not at Commodus’s hands.

He’s like me. He’s like Meg. Hurt, controlled by the people who should support him, seeing him only as a tool, not caring whether he lives or dies, only mourning the loss of some of their power. And making bad decisions, ones that hurt others. Though this is a similarity that only I and Lit share.

I could write him off. No one would blame me if I did. But I can’t. I just can’t. I have to try to help him, to find him a family. I can’t leave him like this, bleeding out, ready to be killed by someone who’s supposed to be on his side.

He deserves a chance.

*flash*

Meg’s dying in my arms.

She came here to help me. She’s dying because she refused to allow the snakes to kill me. I cannot let her die. Please, let this one live.

I tried everything I could think of - reassuring her, singing to her, telling her sternly that she must live - but none of it worked. I only had one recourse. I must share the poison with her.

If she dies, at least she won’t die alone.

*flash*

A bespectacled young man is standing in front of me. My heart attempts to fight its way into my stomach while my stomach tries to relocate up my throat.

Jason.

This is Jason.

My little brother.

Remember.

But

I

can’t.

I zone back in. My body is moving again, doing and saying things I am not in control of.

I heard Jason speak.

“I tried to talk some sense into Zeus. I told him he was wrong to punish you. He didn’t listen.”

I couldn’t comprehend the sentence fully. I knew this, though: Jason had put himself out there to try and protect me, even though he didn’t know me. Even though he’d had no reason to do so. I had done nothing for him. Yet he risked his life for me. He gave his life for me.

He turns to me, puts his hands on both my shoulders.

“Promise me one thing. Whatever happens, when you get back to Olympus, when you’re a god again, remember. Remember what it’s like to be human.”

I broke my promise.

I forgot.

I forgot.

I have to remember. Please, please, PLEASE, let me remember this. I can’t… I can’t let him down again. Let him down more than I already have. Let him down like I let Daphne and Hyacinthus down.

*flash*

Jason’s fighting against an Emperor - Caligula. Arrows are embedded in all of his limbs, but he still keeps fighting.

No.

NO.

NONONONONONONONONONONO

Not again… please… don’t make me watch this again…

Jason turns to me, looks me straight in the eye.

“GO! Remember!”

He’d used his last words to drive that promise into my soul, to ensure that I would never forget.

But I still forgot.

Caligula drives his spear through Jason’s back. He falls, blood soaking through his clothes.

He’s dead.

I couldn’t save him.

My brother is dead.

*flash*

My essence is being torn apart, converted. Dissolved. I will disappear.

Will anyone miss me?

I try to hold onto something, anything. My memories. But they are treacherous. My twin sister! What’s her name? What’s her name?! Please, leave me this. Please.

The woman next to me tells me to hold on, that help will arrive. But how can I resist? Even my most precious memories are slipping away now.

But I have to. For the sake of the dead. Of those who died to allow me to get this far.

I speak senseless words, words that I don’t understand. Yet they seem to help. As I speak, tiles rise up in front of me, blocking the heat just a little.

It’s not fast enough.

But it doesn’t have to be.

A young white furry creature with big ears (Crest! He has a name!) strums on a ukulele.

MY ukulele.

The one I gave him.

The one I promised to teach him how to play.

He’s beaten up, his fingers are broken, but still he plays.

He wants to be a musician.That’s his dream.

He could have left us. I only asked him to save Meg and to show us the entrance to the Labyrinth, nothing more.

Yet he CHOSE to stand guard.

He CHOSE to try to fight off Medea and his minions, despite how outmatched he was.

He refused to relinquish my ukulele, his ukulele, no matter what.

And now he is throwing away his chance of survival, his chance of attaining his dream, in order to save me, a person he’s only known for a day.

I watch on, helpless, as Crest continues to play.

I force out more words, dampening the heat slightly. Crest is buying me this time. I have to use it.

Medea stabs Crest in the chest. Still he plays defiantly.

She stabs him again. But he will not stop.

A third strum of the ukulele, a third stab from Medea.

Somehow he’s still alive, still clutching that ukulele.

*flash*

I’m on the ground, kneeling next to Crest. His fur is matted with blood. His chest is a mess of blood and viscera. But still he clutches that ukulele.

He locks eyes with me (just like Jason did before he died). “Music. God.”

He wanted to be a god of music. Like I was.

I talk to him, try to give him reassurances, convince myself that this cannot be happening, that Crest would be okay.“Yes, my young friend. You are a music god! I- I will teach you every chord. We will have a concert with the Nine Muses. When- when I get back to Olympus…”

Crest slowly relaxes, collapsing into dust. The ukulele remains, the only remnant of the brave young pandos.

I’d forgotten Crest. He had no one else to remember him. I was the only one who really talked with him. I was the one he looked up to. I had taken him on as my student. He had died to save me from a fate worse than death.

I had repaid him by forgetting he ever existed.

0-//O\-0

I woke up sobbing for the second day in a row.

Will. Kayla. Austin. Jason. Crest.  Hyacinthus. Daphne.

I’m sure there’s more that I’ve forgotten, more friends that I made, more lives lost. But these are all that I can remember right now.

My memories… I HAD to remember this time. My memory was growing fuzzy, but more slowly this time. I COULD NOT allow myself to forget. Not again.

I pull myself up using the bars of my crib, trying to stand, trying to walk.

I trip over an object.

My ukulele. The one that Artemis had retrieved for me.

I had always felt great sorrow and guilt looking at it, but I couldn’t bear to part with it.

Now I knew why.

…

That’s it!

Artemis, Leto, and Meg came rushing into the room. I burbled and pointed at the ukulele, trying to get them to understand my idea. They mostly just seemed confused, unfortunately.

At last I screwed up my face and concentrated. I pointed to the ukulele and said “Kest!”

Mother and Sis still looked confused, but light dawned in Meg’s eyes.

“Crest?” she asked. I nodded vigorously.

“You remember him? What else do you remember?”

I concentrate, trying to form the words, get the names out there. “Will. Kayla. Aw-tin. Da-nee. Hya… Hya-si… Hya-si…” I tripped up on “Hyacinthus”. Meg came to my rescue.

“Hyacinthus?”

I nodded, and then forced out the last name. I promised to remember…

“Jay-son.”

Meg’s face fell as she heard the name. She knew what remembering him meant. The guilt was written on my face.

“It wasn’t your fault, Apollo. You tried. He CHOSE to help, KNOWING that he would die. You did everything you possibly could.”

It didn’t make me feel better. He was still dead because of me. I HAD to fulfill his wish, his wish to… what?

Remember

I jolted. I needed to do this NOW, before I forgot more, before my memory faded again.

I quickly crawled out of the tent, into the outdoors, and more importantly, over to the dirt.

Mom, sis, and Meg followed, perplexed.

“Where are you going, brother?” Artemis asked.

I clawed at the dirt with my useless little baby hands. “Hya! Hya!” I cried.

Artemis looked at me sadly. “Hyacinthus is dead, Apollo. Even I can’t bring him back from the Underworld.”

‘That’s not what I mean!’ I wanted to shout. But I couldn’t.

I crawled over to Meg, using her dress to pull myself to a standing position. I pawed at the pouches on Meg’s belt, trying to open them.

Meg opens a pouch, taking out a packet of seeds. “You want this?”

I grab the seeds, not opening it, but shaking it up and down over the hole I had dug. “Hya!” I cried again.

This time, she got it.

“You want to plant Hyacinths?” she asked.

Success!

I nodded vigorously… and then fall over. Need to work on my balance.

Mom summoned a flowerpot. I carefully poked a hole in the soil, and Meg handed me a seed. I dropped it in and covered it up.

Now normally, this might not be enough to get a hyacinth flower to sprout and grow. Normally there weren’t several gods on hand who really, REALLY want that hyacinth to grow.

It grew rapidly, reaching full bloom in a matter of minutes.

I hugged the pot to my chest, crying a little. I won’t forget. I could never forget what this flower means.

There are more people I have to remember though, more I can’t afford to forget.

I tore myself away from the pot.

“Da-nee!” I shouted.

This time, they got it immediately.

Meg summoned a laurel tree seed. Artemis handed me one of her arrows.

I poked a hole in the ground, dropped it in, and covered it up, just like I did with the Hyacinth seed. Within minutes, a fully grown laurel tree had grown outside of the tent.

I sat back and stared at the two plants for a moment. My two loves. They had stopped fading from my mind. Even when my mind reverts back, I was certain that I’d still remember them.

I still felt antsy, though. I’d enjoyed being here, but I felt like I was missing people now.

Like there was somewhere else I wanted to go, some people I wanted to see.

Faces flashed before my eyes.

A young man with blond hair and blue eyes, looking down at me, concerned.

Another young man with dark hair in cornrows, playing the saxophone.

A young woman with ginger hair tinged with green, giving me advice on shooting arrows.

Family

“Ca’p Haf-bud,” I say. They look over to me.

“Ca’p Haf-bud, Ca’p Haf-bud!” I exclaim more urgently.

More of my family was there. I wanted to see them! I wanted to see them so badly!

“You want to go to Camp Half-Blood?” Artemis asks. I nod.

Meg cartwheeled around a bit. “I’d like that. I was getting bored. Plus they’ve got some good food.”

“Ok, let’s go,” Mother said.

Artemis broke down camp, and summoned her chariot. “You’ve never ridden in my chariot, have you, little brother?”

I hadn’t. I tried to look unimpressed and aloof.

Then one of the deer nuzzled me.

SO. CUTE. SO SOFT. And such pretty golden fur!

I immediately forgot that I was trying to be cool and patted their heads, squealing. The deer huffed, and the other three deer joined in, deciding to lick me. I laughed and squealed, it was so fun!

Then I glanced over and saw Artemis with a video camera. I tried to look aloof, but it was too late.

She smirked at me. I tried to be angry, but then one of the reindeer nuzzled me again and I couldn’t.

We entered Artemis’s chariot. I watched as Delos became smaller and smaller, clutching my ukulele (Crest’s ukulele) to my chest, hyacinth in a pot at my feet. The laurel tree grew smaller and smaller as we flew away.

“We’ll plant a new one,” Meg promised. “To remember her by.”

I nodded, tearing up as we flew towards more of my family and friends.

[dumbledearme]

chapter forty-nine—eternal mess

read Child of Land and Sea here

Act V — Walking On Water

Part XII — To be a true hero, kid, is a dying art. Like painting a masterpiece, it's a work of heart.

Hermes kissed his son's forehead and murmured a blessing in ancient Greek. Then the Three Fates themselves took the bodies of Luke and Ethan away.

Andy asked Zeus to light up the top of the Empire State Building with blue colors and the god nodded. He didn't seem to care if it was a weird request or not; he just did it.

The Stoll brothers were fine. Mrs O'Leary had dug Chiron out successfully. Katie Gardner reported that she'd seen Rachel run out of the Empire State Building at the end of the battle. Nico di Angelo came into Olympus to a hero's welcome and so did his father. Clarisse marched in and the god of war proclaimed her the best warrior he'd ever seen. Hera seemed pretty upset Anthony had saved Olympus and murmured something about not being able to destroy him now. Dionysus thanked Andy for keeping his son alive.

The army of Poseidon, the ones who had defeated Typhon, marched into the throne room. Tyson saw Andy and smashed her in a Cyclops hug. Poseidon walked in and even forgave her for sitting on his throne. And for the first time in her life, her father embraced her. He was warm like a regular human and smelled like sea breeze. Andy felt like this huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders. She hadn't realized how much she was needing a hug. "Dad-" she cried softly.

"Shh," Poseidon said. "No hero is above fear, Andy. And you have risen above every hero. Not even Hercules-"

"POSEIDON!" a voice roared. Zeus had taken his throne. "Are you too proud to join us in council, my brother?"

"I would be honored, Lord Zeus." He strode over to his throne and the Council convened.

Zeus started this long speech about the bravery of the gods that seemed to last forever. While he spoke, Andy went to join Anthony who was still sitting in the same place where he had held Luke's body. He hadn't moved a muscle, not even when the Fates took Luke from his hands. Andy knelt beside him, took his hand and kissed it, but he didn't even seem to register her presence.

"As for my brothers," Zeus said, "we are very thankful... erm, thankful for the aid of Hades."

The lord of the dead nodded. He had a smug look on his face as he patted Nico on the shoulders.

"And of course," Zeus continued, "we must... thank Poseidon."

"I'm sorry," Poseidon said. "What was that?"

"There is no way I will be saying it again," Zeus grumbled. "Which leaves us the matter of thanking our young demigod heroes, who defended Olympus so well – even though there are a few dents in my throne." He called Thalia forward and promised his help in filling the Hunters's ranks.

Artemis spoke up. "You have done well, my lieutenant. You have made me proud, and all those Hunters who perished in my service will never be forgotten. They will achieve Elysium, I'm sure," she said glaring pointedly at Hades.

He shrugged. "Probably." Artemis glared at him some more. "Oh, all right," he grumbled.

Thalia beamed with pride. "Thank you." She bowed to the Olympians and limped back.

"Tyson, son of Poseidon," Zeus called. "Doesn't miss many meals, does he? Well, Tyson, for your bravery in the war, and for leading the Cyclopes, you are appointed a general in the armies of Olympus. You shall henceforth lead your brethren into war whenever required by the gods. And you shall have a new... um... what kind of weapon would you like? A sword? An axe?"

"A stick!" Tyson said.

"Very well," Zeus looked disappointed. "The best stick that may be found."

All the Cyclopes cheered.

"Grover Underwood of the satyrs," Dionysus called. "Oh, stop chewing your shirt. Honestly, I'm not going to blast you. For your bravery and sacrificed, and blah blah blah, and since we have an unfortunate vacancy, the gods have seen fit to name you a member of the Council of Cloven Elders."

Grover collapsed on the spot.

"Oh, wonderful," Dionysus sighed. "Well, when he wakes up, tell him that he will no longer be an outcast, and that all satyrs, naiads, and other spirits of nature will henceforth treat him as a lord of the Wild, with all rights, privileges, and honors. Now drag him off before he starts groveling."

Athena called Anthony and he took a long time to move. He stood before the gods, but he seemed to be a miles away. Athena approached him, touched his chin and made him look at her. "You have exceeded all expectations," she told him. "You have used your wits, your strength, and your courage to defend this city, and our seat of power. As it was once said, 'It takes a great deal of courage to stand up to your enemies, but even more to stand up to your friends.'"

Anthony winced like that was the last thing he wanted to hear.

Athena didn't let go of him. "Now, it has come to our attention that Olympus is... well, trashed. The Titan lord did much damage that will have to be repaired. We could rebuild it by magic, of course, and make it just as it was. But the gods feel that the city could be improved. We will take this as an opportunity. And you, my son, will design these improvements."

That got his attention alright. Anthony blinked and stared at his mother, stunned. "Me?"

Athena smiled. "You are an architect, are you not? You have studied the techniques of Daedalus himself. Who better to redesign Olympus and make it a monument that will last for another eon?"

"I... I can design whatever I want?"

"As your heart desires," the goddess said. "Make us a city for the ages."

"As long as you have no statues of Andy Jackson," Dionysus commented, "or I might never return here."

"Make plenty of statues of me instead," Apollo suggested.

"And me," Aphrodite agreed.

"Hey, and me!" Ares added.

"All right," Athena snapped. "He gets the point. Statues. Behold Anthony Chase," she said, "official architect of Olympus."

If Anthony had been miles away before, now he was a whole world away. Andy could see his mind working furiously as he walked back to the stones steps to sit down.

"Andy Jackson!" Poseidon called startling her.

She went to stand before them.

"There she is," Zeus said, "Olympus most disliked demigod."

Ares and Dionysus chuckled.

Andy felt herself blushing. "Okay," she said knowing they wouldn't be kind to her. "Bring it on. Give me all of your hate. But I saved your divine asses and I won't bow to you."

"We can certainly make you bow," Ares threatened.

"A great heroine must be rewarded," Poseidon ignored them. "Is there anyone here who would deny that my daughter is deserving?"

Zeus sighed. "The Council agrees that this unfortunate little brat will have one gift from the gods."

Andy stared at him. "Any thing I want?"

Zeus nodded grimly. "I know what you will ask. The greatest gift of all. Yes, if you want it, it shall be yours. The gods have not bestowed this gift on a mortal hero in many centuries but... Andromeda Jackson – if you wish it – you shall be made a goddess. Immortal. Undying. You shall serve as your father's lieutenant for all time."

Andy blinked. "A... goddess?" the word sounded completely alien in her mouth.

Zeus rolled his eyes. "A dimwitted goddess, apparently. But yes. With the consensus of the entire Council, I can make you immortal. Then I will have to put up with you forever."

"That means I can smash her to a pulp as often as I want, and she'll just keep coming back for more," Ares mused. "I like this idea."

"I approve as well," Athena said, though she was watching Anthony.

The entire idea was so ridiculous Andy started to laugh. Her laughter echoed on the stone walls and the Olympians watched her frowning. She held her stomach and laughed some more, until she heard someone say, "I think she lost it."

Andy looked up at them again. "I can't believe you just offered me this," she gasped. The Council was silent. "A goddess. Ha ha! Have you met me?" she asked them. "I'm like... I'm a... I'm a mess! You want to make me an eternal mess? No!"

"No?" Zeus said. "You are... turning down our generous gift?"

"No, thank you?" Andy smiled. "I'm sorry. I'm honored and everything, I just... don't think that was your brightest idea."

The throne room shook. "What did you say to me?"

"Don't get me wrong," she rushed. "I meant with all respect in the world. It's just... I want to... I want to live. And I want to die. When... you know, time comes." She gave Hades a weary look. The gods glared at her. It was the second time Andy refused immortality. She cleared her throat nervously. "But... um... if your offer still stands, there is something I do want."

Zeus took a deep breath. "If it's within our power."

"It is," she said. "But I need your word. Swear on the River Styx."

"What?" Dionysus cried. "You don't trust us?"

"Someone once told me, you should always get a solemn oath."

Hades smiled. "Guilty."

"Very well," Zeus growled. "In the name of the Council, we swear by the River Styx to grant your reasonable request as long as it is within our power." The other gods muttered assent. Thunder boomed. The deal was made.

"Well, then, here is what I want. From now on, you will recognize the children of the gods," she said. "All the children... of all the gods."

The Olympians shifted uncomfortably.

"Don't you see? All this war... all this death... brother fighting brother... and what for? Demigods who felt abandoned by their parents. They felt angry, resentful, and unloved, and they were not wrong."

Zeus's nostrils flared. "You dare accuse-"

"You dare deny it?" she cut him. "Will you look down on me and say that it is fair to put your children in the world and not once show them that you care? I say no more undetermined children. Claim them. Claim us. Don't leave us out on our own at the mercy of monsters. Protect us. Give us shelter. Bring us to camp so we can be trained right, so we can survive."

"Wait a sec-" said Apollo, but Andy ignored him.

"And the minor gods," she added. "Nemesis, Hecate, Morpheus, Janus, Hebe... they all deserve a general amnesty and a place at Camp Half-Blood. Their children shouldn't be ignored. You couldn't fight this war without us, which tells me that we matter. Calypso and the other peaceful Titan-kind should be pardoned. They did nothing wrong and it's not fair what has happened to them. And Hades-"

"Are you calling me a minor god?" Hades bellowed.

"No," she smiled. "But your children will not be left out. They should have a cabin too. Nico has proven that. No unclaimed demigods will be crammed into the Hermes cabin anymore, wondering who their parents are. They'll have their own cabins, for all the gods. We all matter and we are all welcome at camp. Because we're family."

Ares opened his mouth to speak, but Andy didn't let him.

"You need to stop trying to get rid of powerful demigods. We're going to train them and accept them instead." Finally, she stopped and glanced around the room expecting them to argue. But no one seemed to have the words.

Zeus snorted. "Oh, are you done?"

"Andy," Poseidon started carefully, "you ask too much. You presume too much."

"I presume nothing. I've watched my friends die," she reminded them. "The light left their eyes. And you know, all they wanted was to be loved, to be respected. By you. How is that much?"

That's when Aphrodite gave her a standing ovation. She walked up to Andy. "Ah, Andy Jackson," she said with a bright smile and tears in her eyes. "Such a beautiful surprise. You're so much better than the other Andromeda. All this love you have... I thought it was just for the boy, but you have enough for them all, don't you? The last time I saw someone love this deeply... Helen," she said dreamily. "But Helen was different from you. She was selfish. She'd let world burn as long as she had Paris, because her love was exclusive to him. But you kept the city safe, your family, your friends, and us."

"Okay, I think you're going to far kissing her ass-" Ares started to say.

"No," Aphrodite stopped him. "I've seen loss too. My daughter..." her voice faltered. "But even in the darkest hours, something brings me hope. The rest of you might not understand it. But Andy..." she focused her eyes on Andy. "Andy sees it too. The loudest love is that which is said in silence. Whatever it is you desire, Andy Jackson, shall be yours." Aphrodite reach out her hand.

Andy felt a chill when she touched the goddess. "You flatter me," she said thankfully. "I'm only human."

"Doesn't that just make you outstanding?" Aphrodite whispered.

"She is correct," Athena said, suddenly, surprising everyone. "We have been unwise to ignore our children. It proved a strategic weakness in this war and almost caused our destruction. Andy Jackson, I had my doubts about you, but perhaps" – she glanced at Anthony – "perhaps I was mistaken. I vote that we accept the girl's plan."

"I don't like you," Zeus felt the need to tell Andy. "Not one bit. You are presumptuous. You are rude. You don't know your place and you raise your voice to those more powerful than you." He let out a painful sigh. "But I suppose..."

"All in favor?" Hermes said and all the gods raised their hands.

Andy smiled at them. "You won't regret it. We will make you proud."

"Honor guard!" Poseidon called. The Cyclopes came forward and made two lines from the thrones to the door – an aisle for her to walk through. "All hail, Andromeda Jackson," her father said, "savior of Olympus."

Hermes met her at the door. "Turning down immortality," he said looking at her curiously. "You mortals... Always full of surprises. You know, it was decided Typhon was a freak series of storms and nothing else."

"How bad is the city?"

Hermes shrugged. "Not too bad. The mortals are shaken, of course. But it's New York. I'll help them get back to normal."

Andy nodded. "I owe you an apology," she said looking at her own feet.

"And why is that?" he asked bitterly.

"I thought you were a bad father," she admitted still avoiding his eyes. "I blamed you. Like he did. I thought you knew about his future, but didn't care enough to change it."

"I did know."

"But you knew more than that." Andy raised her eyes and faced the god. "You knew everything. You understood what needed to happen. You trusted he would make the right choice when the time came... and he did. I'm just sorry that you never got to tell him... how much faith you had in him."

"No one can temper with fate," Hermes said miserably. "Not even a god. If I had warned him what was to come, or tried to influence his choices, I would've made things even worse. Staying silent, staying away from him... that was the hardest thing I've ever done."

"I know," Andy said. "But he found his path. He saved us all."

Hermes sighed. "I shouldn't have blamed the boy," he said. "Anthony... when Luke visited him... I knew he was the only one who could get to him, who could reach out and find him in there." He shook his head. "Kronos isn't dead, you know? You can't kill a Titan."

"Then-"

"I don't know," Hermes grumbled. "None of us do. Blown to dust. Scattered to the wind. With luck, he's spread so thin that he'll never be able to form a consciousness again, much less a body. But do not mistake him for dead, Andy. He is not. My son's the one who died. Believing I didn't care about him."

Andy grabbed the god's hand. He stared at her surprised by the physical contact. "Weren't you listening to me in there?" she said. "I told you. Us, your children, we just want a little of your attention. Exactly because we love you. If we didn't, it wouldn't hurt so much when you don't answer. And Luke hurt the most. I think it's pretty obvious that he loved the most too."

A tear streamed down his face and he squeezed her hand.

"You have other children," Andy told him. "I expect you won't make the same mistake."

Hermes's shoulders sagged. "We'll try, Andy. We'll all try to keep our promise. And maybe for a while things will be better. But we gods have never been good at keeping oaths. You were born because of a broken promise, weren't you? Eventually we'll become forgetful. We always do."

"You can change."

Hermes laughed. "After three thousand years, you think the gods can change their nature?"

"If there is one thing I've learned from this war, is that Hope won't leave us unless we tell it to. There is always time for changing. Luke did. And you can too."

Hermes seemed surprised. "You think he really loved me? After all that happened?"

"I'm sure of it."

Hermes nodded. "I'll give you a list of my children. Will you see that they get to camp?"

"I promised," Andy said. "And I don't forget my promises."

"Andy Jackson," Hermes shook his head. "You might just teach us a thing or two."

The goddess of wisdom was also waiting to talk to Andy. It was proving a hard task to leave Olympus without calling attention. Athena's gray eyes blazed when she faced Andy. "You will stay a mortal," she said accusingly like it was a horrible thing.

"Yes."

"You gave us pretty good reasons," she sneered, "but I'm no fool, Andy Jackson. Aphrodite isn't the only one who can see right through you."

Andy hesitated. "I don't-"

"My son." Athena stepped forward and Andy had to fight the urge to run away.

"I love him." She held the goddess's stare with difficulty. She had never said it like that, so raw, so true.

Athena made a face. "I once warned you, Andy Jackson, that to save a friend you would destroy the world. I was mistaken. Like Aphrodite said, you saved both your friends and the world."

"Anthony did. And Luke. And Clarisse, and Silena, and Thalia, and Grover. I didn't do anything alone. A lot of people gave their lives so the gods could remain."

"True," Athena said. "I acknowledge it. That is why my warning will be brief: think very carefully about how you proceed from here. I have given you the benefit of the doubt. Don't mess up."

"I won't."

Athena shook her head. "I might let you have him," she said, "but I will never understand what he sees in you."

"Finally," Andy smiled at the goddess. "Finally something we have in common."

[canarhys]

Honestly, after his life and death, Leo would absolutely be traumatized.

The dude died and he said it was the worst experience he felt in his life. Like hell he’d get over it easily:

he was so used to heat, but for once in his life, he actually felt like his insides were churning from the inside out

this led him using his fire powers less than he already did

he even begins to be afraid of fire, the one thing he’s immune to

also he gets easily scared by loud noises

he nearly becomes deaf because of the experience, and when his friends talk to him they had to repeat what they said several times

but after his hearing heals, he still remembers the loud bomb of the explosion and was forever scarred

he cant even handle balloons popping without screaming

everyone makes sure not to scare him with loud sounds

he just works on quiet projects since he cant handle loud noises anymore

he also has a great fear of explosions

whenever it’s chariot racing time he sits alone with festus in bunker nine because he cant handle the bombs and crashes

one time there was an explosion in the forges and he had to be calmed down by everyone

or in the alternative: he becomes deaf

he cant hear the sweet banging in the forges or the voices of his best friends

all he hears is just SILENCE and it’s horrible

his friends use sign language until he learns how to read lips

he works to make his own ear aid

he also lost his own left arm in the explosion

although he easily made his own prosthetic

however he worries that maybe he’s cheating when he makes or repairs new machines because of his new arm

everyone doesn’t let him think that way and says its because of his brilliant mind that he created so many beauties

he cant handle things staying still for too long

he goes to sleep late and wakes up so early since he hates having dreams or just plain darkness

he’s not as loud or joyous as he was before

he’s still afraid

at first he’s quiet and paranoid, still shivering from death’s cold touch

he becomes afraid of death

he hardly went on quests or even participated in normal camp activities

he doesn’t like hearing rumors or actual news about someone dying

after the war and especially after his death, he suffered more immensely from PTSD, BPD, dependent personality disorder, bipolar disorder, and even PPD

he touches his scars at night that reminded him of his abusive foster homes, life on the streets, and the whole quest thing

i forgot to mention, but he also has a few burn marks for some weird reason - probably a punishment for cheating death

every time he looks at them he just curls up into his bed and cries

also as a headcanon, as punishment for cheating death due to Asclepius resurrecting him, he gets sent to tartarus

after that shit, he hardly smiled

he hates going out into the mortal world but he also hates staying copped up in camp half-blood

hes at that point where he just wants to drown and disappear

especially when during his death he thought he heard his mama call out to him

it broke him

he wakes up every night, whimpering and calling out to his mom and saying sorry

hes still not over her death and still thinks he killed her

I feel like ya’ll are sad by now, but fear not:

finally he’s so fucking done with everything, with the war and monsters and the voices inside his head

he could still hear gaea in his head and it makes him scream

so he decides to run away

he packs his shit and everything and leaves - or, tries to

turns out nico’s there nearby thalia’s tree and stops him

leo tries to get past him but nico knows what he’s doing and tries to help him but leo is just pushing and screaming at him to leave him alone

nico’s only saying comforting words and holding to his hand with no force but leo even goes as far to try to punch him

after what seemed like hours leo finally calmed down and slowly sat in front of the pine tree and nico sits next to him while the latino boy cries

leo finally spills

he starts talking/signing about everything he’s been feeling and experiencing ever since he came back from the dead

about how much he wants his mom back and he hates his dad to leave him on the streets and the stupid gods for making life so fucking difficult

he’s at a crossroads where he wants to die but he’s afraid of death and it just makes him feel so alone and insecure and he just cries until his throat is raspy and his eyes are incredibly puffy and red

nico’s crying too

suddenly, he’s shocked when nico talks/signs about how his life was messed up too

he’s still horrified at bianca’s death and blames percy so much and he’s still not over his crush on him

like he hates him but he idolizes him, and its tearing him apart

he just wants a normal love life but instead he got unrequited love and it slowly tore him apart to where he became even more cold and quiet

and then he talks about how his life on the streets were too, how he hates how his father kept secrets from him, how bianca left him more than once times, how his trek in tartarus left him with scars and intense nightmares

he’s afraid of death too

and he knows how leo feels, to be trapped and sorrowed by our own lives and dreams

but he stopped running away

he tells leo that his friends are here for him, even though it must not seem like it

hes felt what leo’s felt and refuses to let him deal with it alone

he knows leo’s still paranoid about being left out as the seventh wheel and says that without the seventh wheel the car wouldn’t be what it was today

he dealt with his pain alone and it ended with him feeling like an outcast, so he cant leave leo to take it on himself by running away like he did

and he makes a promise on the river styx that he’ll help him

leo’s just quiet and aghast

then silent tears come down his face, relieved that he isn’t alone in this world

that he doesn’t have to be only one to carry his burden

he asks nico if hes alright with helping someone as miserable as him, and nico nods, saying he didn’t make a styx promise for nothing

and even if leo still has horrible nightmares or anxieties or if he even goes insane, he’ll stay with him

and leo for once feels at ease

he lays his head on nico’s shoulder and for once hes at peace

nico doesn’t mind

after that, leo slowly recovers

hes not okay but hes getting better

he finally got a hearing aid and almost cried of joy when he could hear everything / he starts to talk a bit louder and isn’t as scared as he was with loud sounds

his nightmares and visions and voices are still there but he talks about them with nico and his best friends

he still has several disorders and is far from getting over them but luckily he has people behind his back

he gives prosthetics and other useful items to disabled kids in camp

he hangs out with his friends a lot more and actually laughs for the first time in a few months

he joins the rest of the seven + nico and reyna to talk about happier times before and after the quest

he sometimes talks with chiron about his problems since the old man is loving and kind and deserves more respect

he even finds new friends that he never thought would happen (thalia, drew, will, the stolls, clarisse, etc)

him and nico never actually talked before the little half-blood hill thing, but afterwards they started to get to know each other better

they talked about their problems and interests and everything that happened in their lives

leo never felt this kind of feeling of freedom and hope and love with anyone

eventually after several years they got together and honestly they couldn’t be happier

finally, leo and his mom

his wonderwall let him have a small, limited talk with her and leo was incredibly anxious

so nico summons her and its the most heartbreaking event ever

leo tries to hug her and esperanza tries too but they realize theyre in different worlds whoops

so they just express their deep love and missing each other, and leo talks about everything thats happened and even talks about how he blamed himself for her death

esperanza doesn’t let him think that

she tells him he was the best gift to her in her whole existence, and she wants him to always remember her - but not kill himself for her

she wants him to be happy, and she wants him to always remember her existence

and leo feels so much weight lifted from his chest

leo might have illusions and dreams and visions and voices and disorders that still horrify him

but he also has an amazing soulmate, great friends that are with him forever, a loving mother, and a bunch of demigods who share his pain and will be with him till the end

his life isn’t perfect

but its still beautiful

You all can add more!