#like can you babysit if its your own kids. i never get it. name a mom who says that

[preciousbabyrat]

personally I dont get Dan and Phil as dad figures but I must admit Phil calling himself both our dad and our babysitter is the most dad thing I've ever seen

[i-cant-sing]

Okay okay, I have another idea-

Yandere dad Nanami x Nanami reader

I've made yall see the menace Fushiguro reader who we all love and adore, but let's talk about Nanami's daughter who is an absolute angel and polar opposite to Fushiguro reader.

Child reader is just the most well behaved kid, listens to her father always, and since Nanami is raising her, she's also going to be very good in her studies because papa Nanami is a very good teacher. I mean, reader is definitely on top of her class and has a whole wall dedicated to her awards and medals. She just has to show off her math skills when she plays cafe (because obv she's gonna be a baker who bakes fresh bread daily for Nanami to buy and make sandwiches) and uses Monopoly money.

And when I say reader is polite, that is the understatement of the history. She just cannot bear to offend anyone! She has to put "-san" with everyone's name and has to address them correctly. "Yuji-san! Megumi-San!" And "pervert-San!" Which is Gojo, because of course Nanami has told her to beware of him and only address him as "pervert-san".

"But my name's Gojo!" He tells you, but you're so distressed because dad told you to call the white haired man wearing a blindfold/glasses "pervert-san" and it'd be rude to address him as anything else!

And Nanami adores his kid so much. She's such a perfect child, never breaks rules (don't talk to strangers or Pervert san.) and is such a goody-goody. He is a present father, he makes time for you. The Jujutsu sorcerers can wait, the world can be saved by someone else, but he needs to attend your school play at all costs. And even when hes not around for the day, he has raised you to be a very responsible child- like you even go get the groceries on your own when dad is late! (Like that Japanese show in which they send kids to shop on their own)

But of course, there are times when he needs to be away for longer periods, so he needs to hire a babysitter. His top choices: Shoko(although hes a little hesitant since you have a morbid curiosity learning and Shoko would happily let you accompany her to the morgue), Yuta, Maki, Megumi + Yuji + Nobara.

Who is NEVER allowed to babysit you? Gojo.

Gojo babysits anyway. (He fr steals you from Megumi trio)

And Nanami just comes home to Gojo and reader eating takeout and he's just like "Y/n, how could you let Pervert san in your home and eat with him?" And reader's just on the brink of tears and is trying to defend herself "b-but you said to be polite to guests! And Pervert-san bought food for me. Wouldn't it be rude to not share it with him?" *reader's teary eyes* and then Gojo is like "you'd rather let your child starve? Can't you see how tiny she already is?!" *Gojo's teary eyes* and Nanami pops a vein "it's not cute when you do it!"And then kicks Gojo out of the house.

Even though reader can dress herself up appropriately, she still has to have her hair done by Nanami, no matter what age. At some point, reader probably realises that it's something Nanami needs more than she does. It's a tradition, you think, but it's actually a coping mechanism for Nanami to deal with the fact that you're "growing up" and don't ask him to watch cartoons with you or read you bedtime stories anymore🥺

And Sukuna??? He takes one look at you and he's already decided he's gonna be mean to you, but then the more time you spend with him and Yuji, the more he realises.... its just not worth being mean to the only person who is so sweet to him and actually greets and talks to him like he's an individual person and not just a parasite inside Yuji's skin. Like reader just goes "Sukuna-san! I'm painting Yuji-san's nails but he can't pick a color. Will you help?" And he's like "Alright, fuck it I'm taking this brat with me when I comit mass murder. She's safe."

I feel like Nanami will allow reader to have a fairly normal childhood, so he keeps his yandere tendencies at a bay. It's when you start growing up and as he says "the others try to taint you with momentary pleasures" that his yandereness begins to show. Honestly, it's just more of his protective tendencies coming to light than anything else. He thinks people don't have your best interests in and sometimes he's right, but how else will you learn if you don't experience it?

Also, if you do end up having cursed energy and the ability to see curses, I think that's when Nanami starts spiralling down. He does not want you to become a Jujutsu sorcerer, he wants you far far away from the Jujutsu world completely. He can't- he can't allow what happened to Haibrara happen to you. He can't allow your innocence and naivety to be tainted by the horrendous world of curses. He'd rather risk you hating him forever as he locks you away than allow you to put your life at risk for others.

You are his priority. Your safety is his priority. You'll understand in due time why he did what he did, so while his heart does break hearing you cry and beg to be let out of your room, he doesn't regret putting you in there one bit.

Nanami sighs as he continues prepping your dinner. Guess he'll have to add some crushed sleeping pills so that you don't get sick from crying your bodyweight out (or more like he can't bear to see you in such a pitiful state.)

God save the poor souls who do end up kidnapping you.

[wysteria-bloom]

honkai star rail x f!reader - random prompts

-

characters : caelus, welt, sampo, gepard, dan heng

warnings : none! :) sfw

a/n : im obsessed with this game and its characters!! Huohuo and sampo have my whole heart ❤️❤️ requests are 100% open for hsr, so feel free to suggest whatever ideas you have and i will write them! Be mindful that I am currently moving onto the second story chapter so i wont know stuff about jing yuan or blade!! I'm definitely doing one with the girl characters after this one-

Prompt : ̗̀➛Caelus touching [name]'s face and telling her that her face is really soft.

When talking with Caelus, you typically notice the far-off look he gets in his eyes. It’s as though his mind is in a distant land and yet his physical form is present here, with you.

It was an endearing trait of his, but also irritating. Especially when you’re trying to explain something extremely important to him.

He was definitely an odd one…

I mean, the first time you had met him he was head-first in a trash can searching for… something.

But… his strange quirks are what drew you to him. The times where he seemed emotionless were actually the times where he was the most gentle… and the times where he is the most aggressive he comes across as seemingly unhinged.

You were definitely down bad for this strange raccoon guy whom had a literal nuke within him.

Yeah, if your parents were still around they definitely wouldn’t be proud of your choices.

Sighing at the distant look in his eyes, you clicked your fingers in front of his face, frowning when he didn’t even blink,” Oi- Caelus!” You called out, frown deepening further when he didn’t respond,” Yahoo~? Astral Express to Caelus??”

He didn’t budge.

Biting your lip in frustration you went to pinch his cheeks but you were found frozen in shock when Caelus had, in fact, beaten you to it. His fingers were rough from how much he’s been swinging that destructive bat around but they had a comforting warmth surrounding them, and when mixed with the blush on your cheeks you felt as though your face could be considered a heat hazard at this point.

He pinched at your cheeks with a concentrated expression, fingers rubbing your skin gently like he was testing the feeling of it, deciding whether he liked it or not.

It was weird.

He was weird.

But fuck, was it adorable to you.

A hum slipped through his lips and he stopped pinching your cheeks, seemingly deciding on something as he just sort of cupped your face gently in his hands instead.

You blinked up at him in embarrassment and utter confusion,”… You gonna explain what’s going on in that strange head of yours orr…?”

A small smile curled onto his lips as his amber eyes swirled with affection and warmth,” Your skin is very soft… I like it.” He complimented bluntly, his thumbs caressing your cheeks to further emphasise his point.

You were silent for a long moment before furrowing your brows,” I-I… thank you??”

“No problem.”

Prompt : ̗̀➛Welt using [Name]'s lap as a pillow.

It had been a long day seemingly, and Welt felt as though he just wanted to collapse into a black hole.

Maybe even one of his own.

March was a lovely girl but her social personality was tiring… and she clashes too much with Dan Heng. It was like babysitting rowdy siblings.

When he had made it into the Astral Express with an exhausted cloud hanging over him, you noticed it almost immediately. You could pick it out from a crowd of people.

When he saw you his tired gaze seem to soften a little, an ounce of tenderness within them,”… We are never having kids.”

You let out a laugh as he made his way over to you, his head hanging ever so slightly,” Guessing the youngsters were a little too much for you?” You cooed out gently, watching his stiff movements with pity,” oh, dear… surely they weren’t that bad?”

“No, no… they were that bad.” He corrected as he sat down next to her huffing slightly,” I feel drained.”

“Hmm… thats the joy of children.” You teased lightly, gazing softly into his honey-coloured eyes as you pushed his glasses up to the bridge of his nose for him,” Do you want to sleep in my room for a while?”

“…” He watched her, studying your expression and feeling his admiration and love for you slowly consuming him.

Perhaps his exhaustive state was affecting his ability to think logically.

Or maybe that’s just what he wanted to beleive -

But when he found himself moving to lay his head in your lap, he felt as though nothing else in the world mattered to him except for how you make him feel.

You blinked in surprise for a moment at his actions, your hands frozen in the air before you slowly began to card your fingers through his hair. Smiling down at him in amusement you raised a brow,” Is my lap comfortable, love?”

“Well… I’m not uncomfortable.” He answered ambiguously, closing his weary eyes.

I chuckled lightly at that response, continuing to scratch at his scalp gently with my comforting fingers. He hummed in approval,” That’s nice…”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Mhm…”

I sighed a little,” You can’t fall asleep on my lap, Welt.”

“ I disagree… I think this is a perfectly optimal place for me to rest.”

“My legs will die.”

“… a small price to pay.”

Sighing once more, a weak smile curled onto your lips as you took his glasses off for him, setting them to the side,” Alright, alright… Sweet dreams, love.”

There was a small curve to his lips at these words as he began to drift off.

Prompt : ̗̀➛Sampo teaching [Name] how to kiss

“Oh~? Well if it isn’t one of my dearest friends! [name], what brings you to the underground, huh?” Sampo cooed out with his usual easy-going smile on his lips, the sight of you filling his heart with genuine joy.

You blink up at him blankly before humming,” I came to speak with you, actually.” You answered honestly, arms crossing over his chest.

His placed a hand where his heart would be, a fake-shocked look on his face,” Moi?? Why, what a wonderful surprise!” He leaned down a little so he was looking eye-to-eye with you,” My heart swoons at the fact you think about me, doll! How endearing of you~”

You click your tongue, eyes narrowing up at him,” Don’t get too cocky, moron. I came down to make a purchase, not to see you personally.”

He ignored the disappointment he felt as he deflated slightly,” Ehhh? A purchase?” He repeated, raising an eyebrow,” I’m afraid I don;t have many valuable relics in stock at the moment—“

“I want to buy… a-advice.”

“Ehhhhh??” He was even more confused,” I understand I’m a veteran in this business and everything, but you don’t need to buy advice from me, doll. I can just give it to ya.”

You frowned a little at his response and just decided to rip the bandage off, eyebrows furrowing in determination,” Sampo… I want advice on how to kiss somebody.” You stated bluntly and full of purpose.

His eyebrows raised at that answer…’ Who is she prepping to kiss, I wonder?… lucky guy/girl.’ His heart felt like it was breaking.

“Huh? Why do you need to learn a skill like that?” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively,” You planning on fooling around with someone, [name]? How scandalous—“

“No.” You interrupted instantly, bitting your lip to keep yourself from spilling information.

“What makes you think I would be good at kissing?”

“…. Do I really have to answe that?…”

“Yes, please.”

“No… you’d have to pay me if you want to hear that kind of praise from me.”

“Hmmm… I dunno…”

Her eyebrows furrowed,”… I will pay you handsomely if you teach me.”

He bursts into laughter as he pet her head affectionately before stopping himself,” There’s no need to pay me, doll, really!” Then he gave her a cocky smirk,” A chance to kiss you is payment enough~!”

You waved your hand dismissively,” Yeah, yeah, whatever you want… now teach me.” You seemed fairly eager.

Sampo is utterly amused at this, he shakes his head and gives an amused sigh. “Oh, this should be fun.” He says, his smirk turns into a smile. “Okay, come here. Let me show you.” He says and he pulls you close.

He puts his hand behind your head and he kisses you gently. Not too soft, and not too aggressive. You lean into the kiss almost immediately, shutting your eyes as you basked in the feeling of his lips against yours.

Sampo pulls away after a few moments and he’s blushing hard, his eyes locked on yours. “See? How’s that for a lesson?” He asks, his breath a little heavy but he smirks like he’s already planning something to do to you next. He was completely mesmerised by you.

“Hmm… I think I need another demonstration, I didn’t quite understand…” You mumbled, eyelashed fluttering up at him innocently.

Surprised and very eager at this response, he raised a brow and smirks. “You’re asking for more?” He asks. He shakes his head. “Okay then, have it your way..” he says and he pulls you in again. He kisses you a bit harder this time, his arm coming around you.

“Mphm!…” you were surprised by how much more aggressive this kiss was but you were able to adapt to it instantly, your arms coming up to wrap around his neck to pull him closer to you as you took complete control over the kiss.

Sampo is caught off guard by this, his eyes widening in surprise but he keeps kissing you, matching your intensity. One of his hands grabs your waist, the other hand running through your hair. He’s enjoying every second of this. “Mmm…” he says, between kisses.

Then, you pulled away, breathing heavily as you stared up at him with a hazy look in your eyes,” How was that?…”

Sampo’s chest is heaving, his heart is racing. He looks down at you, a big grin on his face. “I think that was perfect,” he says and his breath is shaky. “You’re a natural..” he adds with a smile, his eyes glowing,” In fact… I think you could teach me a few things… how about another try?”

“Sound good.”

Prompt : ̗̀➛[Name] catches a cold so Gepard makes sure all her needs are met like an overbearing mother.

A groan left your lips as you stared up at your ceiling hazily, your nose felt entirely blocked and your face was burning hot.

You were definitely sick. From what? You do not know.

But what you are aware of us how much of an overbearing boyfriend Gepard can be when you're sick like this.

You watched in amusement as he ran around your shared bedroom like a headless chicken, fixing the pillows beneath your head for about the hundredth time that day.

"Gepard... The damn pillows are fine, leave 'em alone." You mumbled, your voice was hoarse and scratchy. You just didn't sound well at all.

Gepard pauses in the middle of fluffing up your pillows to peer down at you for a moment," do you have to be so cranky whenever you get sick?" He rolls his eyes goodnaturedly, but in spite of that, he was still fussing over you, pulling the throw blanket over you and turning the humidifier to full blast.

"I'm only cranky when you start acting like my mom. I've already got one, I don't need two." You watched as he opened the window to let fresh air into the room, and you would be lying if you said it didn't feel nice to have cool breeze hitting your face.

Your response makes his cheeks puff out in kick annoyance, letting out a dramatic sigh," so your mother is the only one who is allowed to care for you?" He settles himself into the comfy rocking chair next to your bed as he looked over you with a tender smile on his lips," I bet you're not even aware of how cute you look while you're sick." He observes.

You huffed, letting out your millionth sniffle that day," yeah, yeah... Only you would find me cute with snot running from my nose." You teased, still finding his compliments charming however.

He smirks and makes a clicking noise at you in response," I think your snotty nose and feverish flush brings out your eyes." There's that charm of his again before his smirk settled into a warm smile," how do you feel, anyway?" There was worry lacing his words.

He reminded you of a cute dog... His caring loyal attitude never ceases to make you fall in love with him even more.

Smiling up at him, you raise a brow," I feel like shit," you stated bluntly before your eyes softened," but you're making the experience more bearable."

Gepard chuckles and strokes through your hair, ruffled up in a way that was adorable to his eyes." I'm sorry you feel so awful." He murmurs," are you hungry?" He asks.

"no... I'm good for now," you looked down at the swathes of blankets covering you and opened them up, patting the spot next to you encouragingly," I think taking a nap with my wonderful boyfriend would instantly cure my fever." You grinned up at him innocently.

Gepard blushed, your expression and the invitation being far too inviting for him to resist," Of course..." He murmurs as he slowly, but carefully climbs up on the bed before nestling against you until he's under the covers.

His arms are wrapped around your body and he's pressed all the way up against you, like your very own heated pillow," is that all better for now?"

Instantly leaning into him warm and comforting touch, you nodded with a peaceful smile on your lips as you buried your face into his chest,” for sure…” you hummed out, already feeling yourself getting sleepy. Your arms wrap around his waist comfortably as you sigh in his smell of cinnamon,” Thank you… for taking care of me.”

Gepard holds back a groan of pleasure as you tuck yourself so close against him, your warm body just that much more appealing with your feverish flush. The moment your head rests against his chest, his arms instantly tighten around you, and he's holding himself perfectly still. He's not letting you go.

He kisses behind your ear, the tender gesture causing him to blush. "It's nothing," He hums, nuzzling into your neck. "It's my duty."

“I suppose it is,” you giggled out, leaning into the tender kisses he was giving you,” You’re like a knight in shining armour…” you hummed sleepily.

His fingers are gently stroking through your hair, the caress almost enough to lull you to sleep. The tender kisses he's pressing into your neck help, but not nearly as much as the loving expression on his face, one that's a picture of pure content. He nuzzles into you, as if to mark you as his, but mostly because he doesn't want anything separating the two of you.

"And you are my damsel," He whispers.

“Your princess,”you reiterated, blinking up at him tiredly.

"My princess." He echoes.

Gepard's arms are as warm and as comforting as they are tight around you. Your head is pressed right against his chest, his voice just an ear-hugging whisper in your ear.

"My precious and beloved princess." He purrs gently.

You slowly drifted off to sleep at his words, his warm and soft voice lulling you to sleep like the lullaby of a siren.

or maybe it was the fever that made you so sleepy.

Gepard holds you against him, nuzzling into your shoulder as he's content to watch over your peaceful sleep.

His fingers trace circles into your hair, and the warmth of his body, especially as the blankets he's pulling up to you trap the heat, are just perfect for helping you recover comfortably.

All this fuss over a simple cold. He'll make sure you're treated like royalty.

Prompt : ̗̀➛Dan Heng doesn't like talking on the phone, but [Name] always calls him instead of texting. [Name] admits that it's because she wants to hear Dan Heng's voice.

Den Heng let out a sigh the second his phone started ringing, he almost immediately knew who it was.

Nobody else called him. Not even March!

Why did you have to be different?

Dan Heng answered his phone with a sigh,"Yes, [name]? What is it?"

There was silence before your light voice graced his ears," Hey there~! Long time no talk, buddy." God, he could hear the shit eating grin in your voice.

That stupid grin.

That stupidly charming grin.

"... I hate you, you know that?" Dan Heng murmured and shook his head with frustration as he rubbed his eyes,"What is it you need now? Money? Food? What have you done this time? Are you in trouble again?" He hissed quietly.

"You don't hate me! Den Heng, where are your manners?" You gasped out, acting as though you were offended by his words when you were only growing more amused.

This is usually how your interactions went. You being irritating and him being irritable. Himeko and Welt can't count how many times you both have had your little spouts.

You were like a married couple, honestly. Disgustingly cute.

"And I don't need any of those things! I'm on the straight and narrow," But then you paused then there was a chuckle," For now."

A small smile spread on Dan Heng's face as he heard your laughter. Thank god he wasn't talking to you in person he'd look like an idiot.

"... you're certainly not on the straight and narrow if you're telling me 'for now'..." He leaned back in his chair and raised an eyebrow, "So what is it you need, then, if it's not money, food, or my help when you've definitely gotten yourself into trouble again?" He asked.

"Welllll..." you dragged your words out, almost as though you were delaying something. But then there was a click of your tongue and-," I just like hearing your voice. Is that so bad?"

You said this so casually. Like it wasn't meant to make Dan Heng have a heart attack.

Dan Heng hesitated and coughed awkwardly as he was taken aback by the sudden shift in what he thought to be a light exchange between him and you. He put his phone close to his ear, his eyes wide with surprise.

“... I-I don’t know what to say.” He said honestly but then he deadpanned,“I was about to tell you that you’re a brat to tease, but I had no idea this was going in this direction.”

"I'm not a brat, am I?" You chuckled out, there was a somberness to your tone," I dunno, you're just easy to talk to."

He heard your clothing shuffle, you must have shrugged.

"But I can tell I'm annoying you, so if you want I can just start messaging from now o-"

Dan Heng was quick to interrupt.

“No, no, it’s fine,” Dan Heng said quickly, waving his hand in front of him as if he could see you through the phone.

“You call me whenever you want to talk. It’s just— your timing—” He ran his hand through his hair again,“I thought this was going to be another prank call.”

He heard silence and then your breathy chuckle," You're so cute when you're flustered, Dan Heng." You hummed out teasingly.

Dan Heng’s face turned a bright shade of red and his cheeks warmed in a way only you had ever managed to achieve for him.

He couldn’t find the words to respond and sat there for a moment until he let out a quiet sigh.

“I wish you weren’t so… so… so…” He said, looking around his room as if to search for a synonym. He sighed again and gave up.

“I take it back... you're annoying.”

"Cute."

He heard the creaking of a chair," I'd like to take you out to dinner." You admitted rather bluntly, though there was a gentle tone to your voice.

"If you'd let me," you then added on as an after-thought.

Dan Heng’s face turned a deeper shade of red and his jaw dropped from sheer surprise.

“…W-what?” He asked you, and for someone who wasn’t known for stuttering, he was doing a whole lot of it.

Once or twice you'd joked to him about it, but in all honesty, there were so many times he wanted to ask you out but never did.

“I-… I would love to go to dinner with you." I said. But then realisation struck him and he cleared his throat," But..." He trailed off.

"Buuuut?...." You repeated, sounding a little nervous.

He frowned at himself for making you anxious,“There’s always ‘buts’ with me, it’s never just a clean cut ‘yes��.”

He looked up at the ceiling and let his head drop back down, growing more emotionally exhausted by the second, “In my defense, ‘you’ and ‘me dating’ are things that have never went together in the same sentence in my head.”

"Dan Heng! So mean." You whined out but you began laughing afterwards," You sure about that, though?" There was a teasing lilt to your voice," I see you and I together a lot.

“Well—” Dan Heng paused briefly and cleared his throat, his eyebrows furrowed cutely. Was he really about to confess this to you? Over the phone at that as well.

“…I have actually imagined a few times…”

He looked up at the ceiling again, his expression turning slightly red and he shut his eyes tightly, cringing at his own words.

“…it’s nothing I can say I ever thought would happen for real. But here we are…”

"Ah, I see..." you sounded almost touched,"... Well, how do you feel?" You asked, genuinely wanting him to express himself.

“How do I feel—?” The question caught Dan Heng off guard. As if he had a lot of thoughts going through his head at once.

“I-I feel—”

He was silent, trying to find the words. He couldn’t find the right words.

“I’ll be honest,” He said quietly, staring at nothing as he held his phone to his ear, “I feel a little scared.”

"Yeah?" She breathed out.

"Yeah," He repeated in the same tone,"...If you and I actually… you know… went on a date..." Dan Heng cleared his throat again, and again, trying to find the words," And you started to know more about me… who I truly am... will you still look at me the way you do now?"

He paused.

"Will you still like me? Or will you end up being disappointed?" He finally spoke in a whisper.

"I... I don't think I could ever be disappointed," you admitted genuinely, a gentle smile to your voice," I know you're closed off for your own reasons... but that makes me more drawn to you."

You sounded so enamoured. Affectionate. He's never heard you speak like this before.

"I want to shoulder your burdens alongside you," you stated simply," No matter what those burdens are. I need to make the weight holding you down lighter... that's my genuine feelings."

“…” In all his years of knowing you, he never thought he’d hear those words in your lifetimes.

The silence grew before Dan Heng spoke again, his voice still a soft whisper but now one of resolve and strength.

“...Okay then.” A small smile twitched onto his lips," Message me the details when you have it figured out."

"Nah, I'll just call you." You confirmed with a clear sound of giddiness within your voice.

Den Heng finally let a soft breathy laugh fall from his lips, his resolve evidently broken,"... I know you will."

[badger-tales]

Emma//S.H x Reader

a/n: I'm not sure if this is exactly what you were looking for in this fic but i really enjoyed this fic its so sweet imo. its kind of more focused on steve and y/n's older child.

word count: 3.4k

request: hello badger! it’s nice to meet you :) can i request steve harrington x reader where she has kids and the youngest one (2 or 3) loves him but the 5 year old doesn’t like him? and steve is so confused because kids love him, he’s great with kids!

Steve Harrington had always had a way with kids. From the time he found himself babysitting the gang in Hawkins, he’d discovered he had a natural charm that made children gravitate toward him. Whether it was his goofy smile, his willingness to get down on their level and play, or maybe just the fact that he didn’t treat them like, well, kids—Steve was someone they could trust. And he loved it. He wasn’t just the guy who made sure they didn’t burn the house down; he was the cool older brother, the protector. 

So, when he started dating you, a woman who had already been through so much raising two kids on her own, he thought he’d be in his element. You were unlike anyone Steve had ever met before. Fierce, independent, with a dry sense of humor that caught him off guard more than once, you didn’t take anyone’s nonsense—not even his. But there was a vulnerability to you that drew Steve in, a strength wrapped in layers of quiet exhaustion and love for your two little ones: Emma, 5, and Jack, 3.

Steve had fallen for you hard. What started as a few flirtatious glances and late-night conversations at the video store had quickly turned into something much deeper. You were wary at first, hesitant to let someone new into the life you had built with your kids. But Steve wasn’t just someone. He showed up. He stayed. And before long, you couldn’t imagine your world without him in it.

Meeting your kids, though—that was a different kind of pressure.

He knew that for this to work, it wasn’t just about winning you over. He had to win over Emma and Jack, too.

When he first met Jack, your youngest, Steve thought, this is going to be a breeze. The second Steve walked into the room, Jack’s eyes lit up like he was looking at his new favorite superhero. The boy had toddled over to Steve with a look of wonder, his little hands reaching up as if Steve were the tallest, most fascinating thing in the world. From that moment on, Jack had practically glued himself to Steve’s side, trailing behind him like a loyal puppy. 

Toddler giggles filled the room as Steve scooped him up, lifting him high into the air while making exaggerated airplane noises. “Whoooosh!” Steve would call out, earning a chorus of bright laughter from Jack as his tiny hands stretched toward the ceiling. 

"Steeb! Steeb!" Jack would call his name with pure joy, tugging at his pant leg every time he came over. The little boy’s affection was immediate and wholehearted.

But Emma, your 5-year-old, was another story.

From the moment Steve walked through the door that first day, Emma had crossed her arms over her chest, standing off to the side like a tiny bouncer guarding her turf. Her brown eyes narrowed in suspicion as she sized him up, and Steve could practically feel the frost radiating from her. She didn’t say much, but she didn’t need to. The look on her face said it all.

When Steve had tried to join in on one of her games, crouching down next to her as she worked on a puzzle, she’d glared at him and muttered, “I can do it myself,” her voice sharp and cold. And if Steve tried again, she’d storm off, her little feet stomping down the hallway as she disappeared into her room, leaving him to sit awkwardly in the living room with Jack still latched onto his side.

It wasn’t long before Steve realized that his usual charm wasn’t going to work on Emma. Kids like me, he thought, feeling more confused with every encounter. *I’m Steve!* The kids he’d taken care of in Hawkins adored him, and he’d never had trouble bonding with them. So why was it so hard with Emma?

It wasn’t just the cold shoulders or the way she refused to participate when he suggested playing a game together. It was the subtle, quiet rejection that gnawed at Steve the most. No matter what he did, Emma kept him at arm’s length. 

He started small, trying to win her over with gifts. He brought over a toy car one day, thinking she’d be excited about it, only to have her wrinkle her nose in distaste. “I don’t like cars,” she said flatly, setting it aside like it was something beneath her.

Not one to give up easily, Steve tried again. The next visit, he brought her a coloring book, hoping that something artistic might spark her interest. But once again, Emma shrugged it off. “That’s for babies,” she muttered, pushing the book away without even looking at it.

You, ever the diplomat, explained that Emma was just a little protective. After all, it had been just the three of you for so long. Steve was new. He was different. And Emma, in her own quiet way, was struggling to adjust. But even though Steve understood that logically, it still stung. He wanted so badly to be a positive figure in her life. He wanted Emma to feel the same comfort and trust around him that Jack did. But no matter how hard he tried, it felt like he was hitting a wall.

Meanwhile, Jack was oblivious to his sister’s reluctance, still riding on Steve’s shoulders and laughing as they played their little games. Steve loved it—he loved how easy it was with Jack—but it made the distance with Emma feel even more frustrating. 

One evening, after another day of awkward silences and Emma’s glares, Steve collapsed onto the couch next to you with a dramatic sigh. He leaned his head back against the cushions, staring up at the ceiling as if it might offer him some answers. “What am I doing wrong?” he asked, his voice tinged with genuine confusion. “I’ve never met a kid who didn’t like me.” He turned his head to glance at you with mock desperation. “You’re sure you don’t talk about how lame I am when I’m not around?”

You laughed, nudging him gently with your shoulder. “You’re doing fine, Steve. It just takes time. Emma’s...she’s a little protective. She’s used to it being just us.”

It was then that Steve knew he wasn’t just dealing with the usual kid stuff. This was deeper. He wasn’t just the new guy trying to win Emma over; he was stepping into a part of her world that had been carefully built and fiercely protected. 

Things came to a head one weekend when Steve had the idea to take both kids to the park. He’d come over early, armed with snacks, toys, and a bright smile. He was determined to make the day fun, thinking maybe, just maybe, he could break through to Emma. But when it was time to leave, Emma stood in the doorway, arms crossed and feet planted stubbornly in place.

“I don’t wanna go,” she said, her voice quiet but firm. “You go without me.”

Steve crouched down to her level, his brow furrowing in confusion. “Hey, we’ll have fun, I promise! We can play on the swings or go down the slide together.”

But Emma just glared at him, her little lips pressed into a thin line. “I don’t want to go with you.”

It was a small sentence, but it cut through Steve like a knife. For the first time, he felt the weight of Emma’s resistance, not as an inconvenience, but as a sign of how much she was hurting.

carefully keeping his voice light, even as he could feel the tension building between them. He offered her his best reassuring smile, the kind that usually worked with kids. “I could push you on the merry-go-round?”

But Emma’s expression didn’t soften. Instead, she met his gaze with that familiar hard stare, her eyes filled with distrust and something deeper—something Steve couldn’t quite put his finger on. Her tiny arms stayed crossed tightly over her chest, as though she was physically guarding herself from him. Steve waited, hoping for any sign that she might relent, but instead, her voice came out low and cold.

“You’re not my dad,” she muttered, her small voice carrying the weight of her feelings, cutting through the air like a blade.

The words hit Steve harder than he expected. They cut right through his heart, sharp and unfiltered, leaving him standing there, speechless for a moment. He straightened up, trying to keep his expression neutral, but the sting of her words lingered, sharp and painful. He hadn’t expected her to be so blunt, and though he’d never once tried to replace her father, hearing her say it aloud made him realize how deep her fear and confusion ran.

For Steve, it was like all the pieces of the puzzle finally clicked into place. Emma wasn’t just being difficult or stubborn. She was scared—scared that Steve’s presence meant a shift in her world, that somehow, by being here, he was going to take away something she held precious. 

But before he could find the right words to respond, you stepped in, sensing the tension that had thickened the air. Gently, you placed a hand on Steve’s arm, your touch grounding him. You could see the hurt flash across his face, but you also knew how hard this was for Emma.

“How about I stay with Emma, and you take Jack to the park?” you suggested softly, your voice full of understanding. You gave Steve’s hand a reassuring squeeze, silently letting him know that this wasn’t his fault, that Emma just needed more time.

Steve nodded, swallowing down his disappointment, though it weighed heavily on his chest. He didn’t want to show it—not to Emma, not to you. He forced a smile as he bent down to scoop Jack up, the little boy already giggling and tugging at Steve’s shirt with excitement.

“Come on, buddy,” Steve said, his voice still warm but quieter now. Jack, oblivious to the tension that had just passed between his sister and Steve, wrapped his chubby arms around Steve’s neck, his laughter filling the air as Steve carried him out the door.

But even as Steve left with Jack’s happy babbling echoing around him, his mind was on Emma, wondering if he’d ever be able to break through that wall she had built between them.

It had been a few days since that moment at the door, but Emma’s words—You’re not my dad—still echoed in Steve’s head, replaying over and over whenever he had a quiet moment. It wasn’t just the words themselves that hurt—it was the realization of how hard this was for her. She wasn’t trying to push him away out of malice; she was just trying to protect something she felt was slipping away.

Steve didn’t want to overstep, but he also knew that if things were going to work between him and you, he couldn’t just tiptoe around Emma forever. He had to find a way to connect with her. 

One evening, after you’d tucked Jack into bed and the house had fallen into a gentle quiet, you asked Steve to keep an eye on Emma while you took care of some things. He found her curled up on the couch in the living room, her small frame tucked into a corner with her favorite stuffed animal clutched tightly in her arms. She was flipping through a picture book, though it was clear she wasn’t really paying attention to the pages.

Steve hesitated in the doorway for a moment, unsure of how to approach her. Normally, he would’ve cracked a joke, tried to get her to laugh or lighten the mood, but something told him this wasn’t the time for that. He could feel the wall she had put up, and he knew he had to tread carefully.

Quietly, he crossed the room and sat down on the floor next to her, close enough to be there, but not too close to make her feel crowded. For a moment, he just sat there in silence, letting her feel his presence before he spoke.

“Hey, Emma,” he said gently, keeping his voice soft. “Can we talk for a minute?”

Emma glanced up at him from over the edge of her book, her face as guarded as ever. Her eyes flickered with something—hesitation, maybe curiosity—but after a beat, she slowly put the book down on her lap.

“Okay,” she mumbled, her voice barely above a whisper.

Steve took a deep breath, steadying himself. He didn’t want to mess this up. “I know you’ve been kind of upset with me lately,” he began, keeping his tone calm and open. “And I just… I want to understand why. I’m not mad or anything—I just want to know how you’re feeling.”

For a moment, Emma didn’t say anything. She stared down at her hands, her fingers nervously fidgeting with the frayed ear of her stuffed animal. Steve could see the struggle on her face, the way she was wrestling with her emotions. After a long silence, she finally spoke, her voice barely above a whisper.

“You’re always here now,” she muttered, still not looking at him. “And I don’t like it.”

Steve felt his heart sink a little, but he kept his voice gentle. “Yeah, I get that,” he said, nodding slightly. “I know things have changed a lot since your mom and I started hanging out. It’s not just you and her anymore, huh?”

Emma’s face scrunched up in frustration, her emotions finally bubbling to the surface. “It used to just be us,” she said, her voice cracking slightly. “Now you’re always here, and you’re taking her away from me.”

And there it was—the truth that had been hiding in plain sight, finally coming into focus for Steve. Emma wasn’t upset with *him* specifically, not in the way he had thought. It wasn’t about the toys or the silly voices or even his presence in their home. Emma was scared. Scared of losing the special bond she had with you, the bond that had been built with just the two of you in her world for so long. Steve felt the weight of that realization settle over him like a warm but heavy blanket. He wasn’t a threat to Emma, not in the way she perceived, but she didn’t know that yet.

The understanding washed over him, softening every muscle that had been tense with confusion and frustration. He wasn’t the enemy here—he was just the unknown. A new chapter in a book that Emma hadn’t quite agreed to read yet.

“Oh, Emma,” Steve said gently, his voice full of empathy now, no longer carrying the edge of defensiveness or worry. He leaned forward just a little, not enough to invade her space, but enough to show her he was truly listening. “I’m not trying to take your mom away from you. I promise. I know how much you love her, and I would never—*never*—want to get in the way of that.”

Emma still sat curled up, her knees pulled close to her chest, but her eyes—those deep, watchful eyes—widened just a fraction, the guarded wall around her emotions cracking ever so slightly.

Steve continued, his voice steady and sincere. “I care about her a lot, Emma. And I care about you and Jack, too. But no one—and I mean *no one*—is ever going to change the fact that you and your mom have something really special. You’re always going to be her number one.”

Emma blinked up at him, her lips parting as though she was about to speak but wasn’t sure if she believed him yet. There was a flicker of something in her gaze—surprise, maybe even a hint of relief, as if she hadn’t expected Steve to understand at all. Like she had braced herself for another adult who wouldn’t listen, who wouldn’t *really* see her.

“Really?” she asked, her voice so small, it tugged at something deep inside Steve’s chest.

“Really,” Steve nodded firmly, his warm brown eyes locked on hers. He wasn’t just saying the words to soothe her—he *meant* them. “Your mom loves you more than anything in the world, Emma. And that’s never going to change, no matter what. I’m not trying to replace anyone. I’m not your dad, and I’m not trying to be. But I’d love to be your friend if you’ll let me.”

There was a long, drawn-out silence after that, as if the whole world had paused to let Emma think it over. Steve didn’t push her, didn’t rush the moment. He just sat there, his eyes soft with understanding, waiting for her to process what he had said.

Emma’s little brow furrowed, her thoughts clearly spinning behind her cautious gaze. Steve could practically *see* the wheels turning in her mind, the way her hands tightened around the worn ear of her stuffed animal, the way she tucked her chin against her knees, as though she was trying to make herself smaller, safer. But then, slowly—so slowly—she lifted her head and whispered a question that made Steve’s heart tighten.

“But… what if you go away?” Emma’s voice was so fragile, so filled with the fear of abandonment that Steve felt a lump rise in his throat. For someone so small, she carried such big fears. And he couldn’t blame her. Being raised by a single parent wasn’t easy, and the idea of someone coming into their lives, only to leave again, must have weighed heavily on her little shoulders. 

Steve’s heart clenched, but he kept his voice steady and kind. “I’m not planning on going anywhere,” he said softly, his tone reassuring but honest. “But I get why you’d worry about that. It’s okay to feel scared sometimes. I know it’s going to take time for us to get to know each other. And I’m not in a hurry. We can go slow. And if you ever want to talk or play or just hang out, I’m here. I’m not going anywhere unless you tell me to.”

Emma’s frown deepened, and for a moment, Steve wondered if he’d said the right thing. But then, as if she had finally begun to believe him, she slowly uncrossed her arms from around her knees. She looked up at him again, her eyes still wary, but there was a tiny spark of curiosity in them now—something hopeful.

“You really like my mom, huh?” she asked, her voice still cautious, but there was something new in her tone. A hint of vulnerability, maybe even a little bit of trust.

Steve smiled, his heart warming at the shift in her tone. He could feel the tension beginning to melt away, just a little. “Yeah, I really do. She’s pretty amazing.”

Emma seemed to consider this, her expression softening ever so slightly. She didn’t say anything for a moment, but Steve could tell she was thinking it over. Finally, she spoke again, this time more tentatively. “You like playing games, right?”

Steve’s eyes brightened, relief flooding through him at the change in direction. He smiled, letting out a soft laugh, grateful for the chance to meet her where she was comfortable. “Yeah, I love games. Why, do you have a favorite?”

Emma hesitated, biting her lip, before she mumbled quietly, “I like puzzles. But they’re kind of hard.”

Steve grinned, feeling the tension in the room ease just a little more. This—this small invitation—was what he had been waiting for. A way in. “Well, I’m pretty good with puzzles,” he said, trying not to sound too eager. “Maybe we could try one together sometime?”

Emma glanced at him from beneath her lashes, her lips twitching into the tiniest of smiles. It wasn’t a big smile, but it was there. “Maybe,” she said softly.

It wasn’t much. But to Steve, it felt like a victory. A first step. He knew this was going to take time—Emma didn’t need him to swoop in and win her over with grand gestures or flashy promises. She just needed him to be patient, to understand, to meet her where she was and let her come to him when she was ready.

As she picked up her stuffed animal again, her small hands smoothing over its familiar surface, Steve leaned back against the couch, feeling a wave of relief wash over him. He wasn’t going to rush this. He didn’t need to. For now, it was enough to know that he had made a little progress, that the walls Emma had so carefully built were starting to come down, brick by brick.

And from the way Emma glanced at him, her guarded curiosity beginning to shift into something warmer, Steve knew she was starting to warm up to him in her own way.

[roosterforme]

Always Ever Only You Part 7 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: When you and Bradley babysit Cat's son for the evening, you get a preview of what life could be like. You have to watch as your husband has the time of his life, and the ache inside you feels like it will never go away. Bradley starts to wonder why Jake is being singled out at work as he counts down the days to his deployment. 

Warnings: Fluff, smut, angst, swearing

Length: 5300 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader

This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order. Gorgeous banner by @mak-32

"We need to come back here," you said as Bradley opened the passenger door of the Bronco for you and buckled you in. "Promise me, Roo. I loved it here too much. Promise we can come back."

Le Chateau California with all its quirky colors and weirdness was so much fun that you didn't even want to leave at noon the next day to go home. But Bob had stayed with Tramp for the night, and you needed to get back in time to babysit Jeremiah for Cat.

"We can come back, Baby Girl." Bradley looked exhausted, and you definitely felt exhausted in your glasses and yoga pants. You and he had gone at it half the night after the dream come true that was the hot sauce vending machine. Your husband was top tier, always finding something silly you'd like and indulging you.

You listened to his Motown playlist as he drove back toward San Diego, looking out the window at the ocean. When you reached across the seat, his hand was there, his fingers warm and ready. "I love you, Roo," you whispered, leaning against the window and dozing off.

When Bradley wrapped his arms around you and carried you inside, you were only semi awake. You registered that he put you in bed and kissed your forehead, and then you napped for another hour or so. You woke up still drowsy but feeling delicious, wondering if you had time to take a bath before Jeremiah got dropped off.

When you went into your bathroom because your bladder was about to burst, tears filled your eyes as soon as you sat down on the toilet. Blood. Your period had started. You knew it was going to. You had the cramps and the moodiness leading up to the weekend to prove it, but until you saw it for yourself, that same delusional feeling of hope had been residing in the back of your mind.

You cried on the toilet for a few minutes. You swore you were going to be done with the tears soon, and grab a tampon and move on with your day. But you were still crying hot, hateful tears when Bradley walked in looking for you.

He must have known what was wrong right away, because he came to kneel in front of you without uttering a word. Then he held both of your hands in his while you ugly cried on his shoulder.

"It's me and you," he whispered. "We're a team, and I love you. We got time."

But you could hear the undertone of sadness in his deep voice. You took a deep breath and said, "I fucking hate the way this feels. It hurts so much."

"I know," he promised. And once again, you felt like you were letting both of you down. "And I hate that you're in tears right now. Do you want me to get your phone and call Cat? Tell her we can't watch her kid?"

You shook your head. You didn't want to cancel now. Cat and Cam could go on their stupid date. They'd probably fall in love and have a million more kids that you'd keep agreeing to watch for them when they went out on more dates. "No, it's fine."

But when Cat arrived a few hours later looking like a smokeshow while you were still in your yoga pants and glasses, you felt even more ridiculous. You opened your front door for them, freezing in place at the sight of the sweet child in her arms. He turned to look at you with a little grin that told you he was probably a bit of a trouble maker. He had the same dark eyes as Cat, and when you greeted him by name, he giggled.

"He likes you," Cat said, stepping inside, and then Bradley was walking out of the kitchen. His face absolutely lit up when he saw Jeremiah, and you had to swallow against more tears. Pleading with yourself would only get you so far when your husband reached out to take Jeremiah into his arms, only to be greeted by little hands reaching up to his mustache.

"Hey, little guy," Bradley laughed, letting Jeremiah touch his face and hair. "We're about to have so much fun. You wanna hear a story about a Super Hornet?"

"Wow," Cat said, handing you a bag while she watched Bradley walk into the living room with Jeremiah in his arms. "The two of you should have kids. Your husband looks like a dad already."

The words felt like a physical punch to your gut, so much so that you staggered back a step. You knew she didn't mean to hurt you, but she had, and now the tears were right there as you desperately tried to blink them away. "Your ex husband wasn't like that?" you asked softly.

Cat looked at you with soft eyes now, and her lips parted a few seconds before she spoke. "He never met Jeremiah," she whispered. You wanted to know more, your curiosity getting the better of you in spite of yourself. But then Cat asked, "Are you okay?"

You nodded vigorously. "Yep, just perfect. You should go before you're late." You peeked into the bag to find some toys and a few snacks while you listened to her directions. But you could hear Bradley laughing while Jeremiah giggled, and you were distracted.

When you opened the door for Cat to leave, your eyes settled on an older SUV parked behind your car. It was so familiar looking with the scratch on the hood and the bent antenna. As she climbed in, you were sure you'd seen it on base before, but you knew she didn't own a car. Maybe it belonged to her uncle? You watched her pull away, certain you had parked next to that SUV at work on Friday.

"Hey, Roo," you called out, walking into the living room. "Do you know anyone at work who drives an older, green Chevy SUV?"

But he wasn't listening. He was laying on his stomach while Jeremiah lined up blocks on his back and giggled. "Look how cute this is," he crooned. "I get to be Godzilla and destroy the city after he builds it." Bradley did indeed growl and crawl around the room with Tramp, knocking the blocks onto the floor while Jeremiah clapped.

Then they did it all over again. It was the cutest thing you had ever seen. A few minutes later, you crashed the party with a sippy cup and a pouch of applesauce, and Jeremiah sat in your lap. He looked up at you as you helped him squeeze the pouch. Tramp kept trying to lick his hands, hoping for a little treat himself.

"He's so sweet," Bradley said softly.

"Yeah," you agreed, enjoying the feel of his warm little body settled back against you while he ate. When he smiled with his few teeth, you smiled back. And when he got applesauce on your area rug, it didn't really matter, because Bradley got a paper towel right away. Even changing his diaper wasn't bad. And then Bradley changed it later, and he did a great job of it. You got Jeremiah into his tiny pajamas with soccer balls all over them, and he just looked so adorable.

When it started to get late, you pulled some books out of the bag, and Jeremiah walked over to where Bradley was sitting on the couch. "You might as well settle in, little guy," Bradley told him. "Her voice is so sweet, she's going to put you right to sleep."

The child curled up against Bradley's chest and looked at you as you started to read a book about rhyming animals. He made it halfway through a second book about eating healthy foods when his eyes started to close. "I tried to warn you," Bradley whispered, wrapping one big arm around Jeremiah's small body as you closed the book. "Her voice is lethal when she uses it like that." He looked at you for a beat and added, "It's lethal when she whines my name, too. But that's a different kind of lethal."

"Don't say that in front of the baby!" you scolded, crawling across the floor to them.

"He can't understand. And look, he's already asleep anyway." You sat at Bradley's feet with your chin on his knee and watched Jeremiah's little body move as he inhaled and exhaled. He was so perfect, you let your heart ache. If you had actually gotten pregnant last June when you went into a panic over your late period, you'd be eight months along right now.

When Bradley ran his fingers along your cheek, you realized you were crying. "It'll happen, Sweetheart."

He looked so content with Jeremiah on him, and he'd clearly had so much fun tonight. He should be a dad. He wanted it, and he'd be excellent at it. Cat was right.

"What if it doesn't?" you asked as he wiped your tears. "I can see how much you want this, Bradley. Looking at you around kids makes me ache."

Then he carefully slid to the floor next to you, holding Jeremiah tight while he slept on. He kissed you softly and wrapped his other hand around you. "I wasn't lying when I told you that I never thought about this stuff before I met you. You are everything I need. Anything else, like a kid, would just be a bonus. But I still think it'll happen."

You nodded as you cried. "I want it to."

"So do I, Baby Girl. You make me feel like I can have everything. Just... give it some more time, okay? We'll get there."

When Cat knocked softly on your front door, you and Jeremiah were both asleep on Bradley. You let Bradley kiss your cheek where you could still feel the tracks of your tears. As you walked over to get the door, you tried to wipe at your face.

"Well? How was your date?" you asked her, but she just sighed as she stepped inside.

"How is it possible that I have zero chemistry with a guy that sweet and cute?"

You immediately perked up. Maybe Jake wasn't completely out of the running. You'd overheard them flirting, and it sounded a little spicy. There was definitely some chemistry there. "Are you going out with Cam again?" you asked cautiously.

"Probably not," she told you with a little frown. "He said he's not a big fan of kids. So I'm not going to ask him out again, and I highly doubt he'll ask me. Which is fine. I don't want to make anything weird at work by trying to force something that just isn't there. You know, since his lab is down the hall from ours."

"Right," you agreed with a nod as Bradley carried a still sleeping Jeremiah over. "Don't want things to get awkward."

You watched Bradley slip his shoes on and whisper, "Want me to just put him in his car seat?"

"Sure," she replied with a smile. "If you don't mind." Once he was out of earshot, Cat turned to you. "Looks like Bradley had a fun time?"

You nodded, swallowing, afraid your voice was going to shake. "We both did. Jeremiah was so sweet."

She smiled and nodded. "I can't thank you enough."

You kind of wanted to tell her that you and Bradley would be more than willing to watch her son again if she decided to change her mind about going out with Jake. But you didn't, because she was already turning to leave.

When Bradley walked inside, he wrapped you up in his arms. "Do your cramps hurt?"

"A little," you replied against his chest.

"Get ready for bed," he whispered. "I'll get your heating pad ready."

"Will you come to bed, too?"

"As soon as I let Tramp out, I'll be in."

You fell asleep with a hopeful heart even though you had your period as you curled up on Bradley's chest.

-----------------------

First thing on Monday morning, Jake was on your tail as you walked inside from the parking garage. "I heard Cam took Cat out this weekend," he told you in an accusatory voice. "Did you set them up? Is that why you didn't call me back last night?"

"No, Jake," you sighed. "I didn't set them up. Why would I do that?"

"Because you've known Cam longer than me and you love him more?"

You snorted as you made your way to the elevators. You knew he needed to be in the locker room right now, but he wasn't leaving. "Jake, I went to the movies with Bradley last night. I didn't call you back, because it was late when we got home. And from what I heard, Cat and Cam won't be going out again. Neither of them had a great time, okay?"

"Oh," he said, a bit of a smile making its way to his lips. "Sounds great. See you later."

He walked away and just left you standing there muttering, "What the fuck?" as you pushed the elevator button. Cat was already in the lab when you got there. "How are you always here so early?" you asked her, checking the time.

She rolled her eyes and shrugged. "Have to ride in with Bernie, and he doesn't tolerate being late," she said with a yawn. But then her eyes went wide like she suddenly realized what she had said.

You were absolutely right when you thought that green SUV was familiar. "So your uncle works on base?" you asked with a smirk. "He's in the navy?"

Cat grimaced at you. "Would it absolutely kill you to keep that to yourself?"

"I'll do it for a small fee," you replied.

"Name your price."

"Next time you go on a date, you let us watch Jeremiah again."

She laughed. "I'm not going on another date anytime soon," she swore. "But sure, you can watch Jeremiah in about seventeen years when I date again."

After that you got to work, but when you went downstairs for lunch, you found Bradley at a table with two trays and some of the green hot sauce you loved. "Are you even real?" you asked as you sat down across from him. You were bloated, and you still needed to lose some weight so your uniform fit better, but you were also starving. You inhaled the burrito bowl after you doused it in hot sauce.

"Look," Bradley said, nudging your leg with his foot. When you turned, you saw Cat and Jake both holding trays of food. Neither of them seemed to be making a move to actually sit and eat; they were too busy gazing longingly into each other's eyes as they chatted.

"She should just go out with him," you said with an eye roll. "Like he's good enough to flirt with but not to get dinner with?"

Bradley grunted while he ate. "He's really into her. Apparently he's not sleeping around anymore."

You looked at your husband as he chewed. His cheeks were tinged with a little pink, and he wasn't meeting your eyes. "Sounds like you, Roo."

"You know," he started, shaking his head, "I kind of wish I had changed for myself. But it wasn't until I met you that I knew it was time."

You basked in his words. "Do you even understand how flattering that is?"

He just looked at you, his gaze dipping down to your lips. But then Jake was setting his tray on the table next to you.

"Could you two stop eye fucking each other while I eat?"

You turned to him and glared. "Could you be less of a dick?"

"Absolutely not," he said, taking a bite of his sandwich. "I asked Cat out again."

Your jaw dropped open. "What did she say?"

"No, of course," he replied, completely unfazed. "I knew she would. But I've changed my tactics. I'll just keep asking until she says yes."

"What if she never says yes?" Bradley asked, lacing his fingers with yours across the table.

"She will," Jake replied, watching Cat as she walked out of the cafeteria. You wanted to bonk their heads together. You also kind of wanted to tell him about Jeremiah and give him a heads up.

But instead you told them both, "Guess who will be working in the tower later this week?"

"Seriously?" Bradley asked with a smile as he leaned across to kiss you.

"Yep. Cat, too."

And now Jake looked pleased as well.

---------------------------

Bradley rushed back to base on Thursday morning after his appointment. It took less time than he anticipated, and now he just needed to wait for some results to come in.

"You're up next along with Hangman," Maverick told him as he zipped up his flight suit.

Bradley knew you and Cat were sitting in the tower today, testing out some new software interface signal response thing that made very little sense to him. Honestly, he was just happy you'd be on the receiving end of his communications again today. You'd been there since Tuesday, and Bradley loved it when you moaned softly in his ear after work and said, "I love listening to your voice when you're flying. I always have. So sexy, Roo."

"Fuck," he grunted, ready to get in the air once again. But Hondo had Jake cornered on the tarmac, and he didn't look too happy. He couldn't hear them, but Hondo had his finger pointing at Jake's face. To Jake's credit, he just stood there and took whatever Hondo was dishing out, but Bradley was sure this would mean some push ups were coming their way.

"What did you do to piss him off?" Bradley asked when Jake joined him, and they walked to their aircrafts together.

"Honestly? I'm not even sure," Jake replied, running his hand through his hair before putting his helmet on. "Ol' Hondo and I are usually square."

"That's what I thought. Don't antagonize him. I wanna look cool in front of my wife."

Jake snorted. "Joke's on you, Rooster. Angel, for some bizarre reason, always thinks you look cool."

He watched Jake take off, and then he started to taxi as well. When they were both in the air, they actually worked really well together. Bradley wasn't sure if it was because he knew you were listening in or not, but he communicated great with Jake, and some of the maneuvers they pulled off against Maverick were pretty impressive.

But as soon as they were back on the ground and climbing down their ladders, Bradley heard Hondo laying into Jake again.

"You wanna fly like shit? You're going to do push ups for me all afternoon. Two hundred. Start counting them off, Hangman."

Bradley watched Jake quickly remove his helmet, and for a second it looked like he was going to question Hondo. Bradley knew that was a terrible idea, and yet he didn't understand what they had done to earn the punishment.

Bradley took his helmet off as well and dropped down next to Jake, getting himself in the perfect stance.

"What are you doing, Rooster?" Hondo asked hardhly.

Bradley looked up at him, brow creased in confusion. "Two hundred push ups, sir." Jake was already ten deep by this point.

"I wasn't talking to you when I assigned them, Lieutenant Commander. Get your ass inside."

Bradley looked from Hondo to Jake one more time before he got to his feet and made his way into the rec room, completely unsure about what had just happened. He dropped down on the couch next to Nat who was sound asleep and waited for Jake to finish his punishment.

When he eventually came storming inside, Jake tossed his helmet onto a chair and ran the back of his hand across his sweaty brow.

"What the hell happened?" Bradley asked, getting to his feet.

"Fuck. I have no idea!

"It's always a team effort," Bradley replied, completely baffled. "Your two hundred push ups are my two hundred push ups. But we didn't even fuck up in the air."

Jake wrenched the zipper down on his flight suit. "He made me do three hundred. And it's a million degrees in the sun today.

"Three hundred? What the fuck?"

"If you figure out why Hondo suddenly hates me, please let me know." Jake threw his hands in the air before he downed a bottle of water.

-----------------------

You ran down the tower stairs anxious to get to Bradley. You were a little worked up from listening to him flying. It had been so long since you'd been treated to that. You briefly thought about bootlegging an illegal recording of him in the air so you could listen to it when he was deployed in a few weeks when you were needy.

"Baby Girl."

You spun when you heard his raspy voice, and then you were in his arms. He pulled you behind the bottom of the stairwell. It wasn't the most private place, but you had your fingers in his hair immediately, and he was rutting up against you as he dirty kissed you.

"Bradley," you moaned when his lips found your neck. "We can't do this here. And I still have my period." But his fingers were on your buttons anyway, and then one hand was dipping inside your bra.

He stroked your nipple into a tight peak, and you felt yourself clench. "You gonna be a good girl and let me fuck you as soon as we get home?"

His mouth moved to the swell of your breast as you whispered, "Yes. Whatever you want."

"My favorite words," he murmured, and you had to forcefully remove his hands from your body. Your breasts were a little sore from your period, but his rough hand somehow made you want more.

"I'll meet you at home?" he asked. "After I hit the locker room?"

"Yes," you agreed. "I still need to carry my equipment back to my office, but I'll see you at home."

Bradley grunted and left you there with your shirt unbuttoned. You quickly fixed yourself up and then started the trek back to the main building. When you passed the aviators' lounge and saw through the small window that it was empty except for Jake, you started to reach for the door handle. But then you froze. When Jake turned a little bit, you saw that he was with Cat, her small form had been eclipsed by his larger one.

"Oh, shit," you whispered. Because Cat was running her fingers through Jake's hair, and then he leaned down to kiss her. And there was no way this was a first kiss or even a second or third. While it was more sweet than sexual, they looked pretty familiar with each other. The way Jake's hand trailed down her arm before settling high on her waist was telling. As was the way Cat smiled against his lips.

You ducked out of the way, afraid of being caught by them. You didn't know what was going on this week. It was like the Twilight Zone or something. Jake kept getting in trouble. And Cat insisted she wouldn't go out with him when clearly she was really, really into him. And you wanted answers that you didn't feel like you were allowed to have. And you were keeping too many secrets.

When you pulled your little car into the driveway, Bradley was already home. You walked inside, intending to tell him about Cat and Jake, but as soon as you set down your bag, your husband was eyeing you up and down.

"You want to finish what we started in the stairwell, don't you, Roo?" you asked, looking up at him with an innocent expression.

He groaned, rubbing himself through his gym shorts. "I've been rock hard for the past hour, Sweetheart."

"You poor thing," you crooned, reaching for him and stroking his cheek softly like he was something to be pitied. "Do you need some help? Anything I could do for you?"

His lips crashed against yours as you slipped your hand down the front of his shorts. He wasn't even wearing any boxer briefs, and he groaned when you palmed his balls. "Fuck, Baby Girl."

"Mmm," you hummed against his lips as you wrapped your hand around his thick cock the best that you could and started to stroke him slowly. "Why don't you tell me what you want?" you whispered against his mustache. "I'll give you a little reward for taking me to that hot sauce vending machine."

Bradley bucked into your hand, and you giggled. But his cheeks were flushed pink, and his eyes looked a little but guarded. You tilted your head, questioning his gaze, and he finally asked, "Will you go put your glasses on?"

"Sure?" you asked, stroking him one last time before you withdrew your hand from his shorts.

Bradley watched you lick his precum from your hands, and he swallowed hard and added, "Any chance you'd give me a blowjob and let me cum on your glasses?"

You were kind of shocked. The two of you had been together for a while, and you would absolutely do that for him. If he wanted it, he could have asked for it before now. God, it sounded fucking hot!

"Only if you take some pictures when you're finished," you told him, wanting to know how that would look.

He swiped his tongue between your lips before smacking you lightly on your butt and pushing you toward the bathroom. "Hurry, Baby Girl."

You quickly removed your contacts and pushed your glasses into place, and when you returned to your bedroom, Bradley was standing there naked, stroking himself slowly. His tip was red and swollen, and he was groaning as he looked at you.

"Oh, you really need me," you acknowledged, dropping to your knees in front of him. "I'll take care of you."

As you parted your lips and let your tongue peek out to swirl around his tip, he gasped. Bradley reached out to adjust your glasses on your face as his cock jumped in anticipation.

"Couldn't stop thinking about you on the drive home," he grunted as you opened wider to take him deeper. "Needed you."

You moaned your approval around him as Bradley thrust and hit the back of your throat. When he placed one hand softly at the back of your head, you let him get a little rough, pushing you where he wanted you.

Gagging over and over again, your eyes started to water. "You look so pretty," he growled. "You're my little slut with your mouth full of my cock."

Oh, he was on a roll at the moment, because you were gagging and nearly crying, but you were also clenching your thighs together, unbelievably turned on by his words. You sucked on him hard, withdrawing him inch by slow inch as his head tipped back.

"Fuuuuck," he groaned. "So good."

You were drooling down the front of your uniform shirt as you took his tip between your lips again. He was so silky smooth against your tongue. It was like a treat that you didn't want to release. You took him a bit deeper, still circling the tip of him with your tongue while you hummed in satisfaction.

"Baby Girl," he snarled. "My wife is so fucking hot."

And then you let him fuck your face hard, gasping for air when you could. You were reaching for him, trying to pull him closer, but suddenly he had your chin in one hand while he stroked himself with the other.

"Roo?" you asked as he jerked your chin a little bit.

"I'm gonna paint you up," he panted, and the first ribbon of his cum hit your glasses making you squeal in delight.

"Keep going," you encouraged. "I want more."

His groan filled your ears, letting you know how much he was enjoying himself. Your glasses were completely coated now, and you couldn't see him very well. He came on your forehead, and it dripped along your nose. He came in your mouth, and you swallowed him down.

"Here," he gasped, running his spent cock along your lips so you'd part them for him. You sucked gently on his softening length while he told you he was taking some pictures. You let him rest on your tongue. "So pretty. Gonna get off to these when I'm deployed."

Soon his fingers were dipping into the mess, and you cleaned them off for him as he knelt down on the floor with you. "That was fun," you told him when you were mostly cleaned up and he was removing your glasses.

"Thank you," he rasped, kissing your cheek softly. "I figured it didn't matter if I came in your pussy today since you're not fertile right now."

His words hit you, making you frown as he stood up and pulled you to your feet. So fucking you and giving you a creampie was only imperative if you were ovulating and trying for a baby? You tried not to think about his words as you walked back into the bathroom and washed your face and glasses. He probably hadn't meant to send that prickly feeling of annoyance along your skin. But he looked sated and happy now while you were...not.

"How do you feel about pizza for dinner?" he asked, scrolling through the photos he had taken. "Jesus, look at you. In your uniform, too," he muttered.

You looked at the photos with him. He wasn't wrong. You looked hot covered in his cum like that. It was a rank kink fantasy. "I like that one the best," you told him, pointing to one where you had his cock cushioned on your tongue. "And pizza sounds fine."

--------------------

Bradley was starting to feel anxious about his deployment. It wasn't helping that he had to keep watching Jake get roasted by Hondo day after day. But to his surprise, Jake really held it together, showing only the highest level of respect.

"Yes, sir," Jake told Hondo, promptly unzipping the top of his flight suit and starting the five mile run which he had been assigned as a punishment.

When Bradley asked if he should join Jake, Hondo once again told him to get his ass inside. Still baffled, Bradley made his way back home for the evening. He beat you there, and it was a good thing, too. His results had arrived in the mail. He tossed all the other mail aside and ripped into the envelope, but as soon as he scanned through it, he heard your car in the driveway.

"Thank goodness that piece of shit is so loud," he groaned about your car, quickly shuffling all of the mail into a neat stack and pushing it to the side. He'd sort it out later. But when you came in, he was writing up a harmless list of things he needed from Amazon on the whiteboard that hung on the refrigerator. A ten foot phone charger, earplugs in case he didn't get to bunk with Bob, a silicone ring, and some protein bars.

"Hi, Roo," you called from the living room. You had apparently picked up your dress whites from the dry cleaner in preparation of your promotion banquet. He, and everyone else, had already taken to calling you Lieutenant Commander. And he loved calling you Bradshaw as well. Your promotion ceremony would just be a formality, just as his had been. But he couldn't wait to pin your new insignia on your uniform for the first time.

He kissed you and held you close, before he whispered, "Don't forget, it's Hard Deck night," just to annoy you.

"Oh, my god!" you groaned dramatically as you laughed and pushed him away. "You're as annoying as Jake."

"Fucking ouch," he shouted after you as you went into the bedroom. Your laughter filled him up. "Hey, you need anything from Amazon?" he called out.

"No, I'm good," you replied, and he tried to do a better job of hiding the mail. But then you added, "I'd be better if you were in here... helping me get undressed," and he dropped everything.

------------------------

Hey, Uncle Bernie. Hey Roo, hiding the mail. Thanks to @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 8

@hotch-meeeeeuppppp

@swthxrry

@chassy21

@yaboid19

@solacestyles

@avoirlecoupdefoudre

@daisyhollyxox

@throwinsauce

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@avada-kedavra-bitch-187

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@marantha

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@xoxabs88xox

[rogueddie]

Eddie had thought that, like always, getting back from tour would be a fun affair. Ever since his and Steves little Robin started school, just three years ago, it had become a celebration. Steve and Robin always made sure he understood how they would always miss him so much that it hurt.

Still, he hadn't expected to find Robin sobbing. The distressed, lost look Steve gives him only makes it sting more.

"Baby, hey," Eddie says, voice hushed, practically joining her in Steves lap with how close he sits next to him. "Birdy?"

"She won't talk to me," Steve explains. "Its... she was so happy this morning."

Eddie turns his attention back to her. "Did something happen at school?"

She pulls back, suddenly. Eddie barely has time to notice that Steve's shoulder is left soaked with how much she'd been crying- she grabs Eddie's forearm tight, eyes wide.

"Are you and mama gonna get divorced?"

"I sure fucking hope not," Eddie says without thinking.

"Eddie!"

"What?"

"You sleep in different rooms," she sniffles, drawing their attention back to her. "And you always go away, dad, like... like, all the time."

"I go away for work. You know how much I hate leaving. I checked that pretty little calendar you made me, every single day. You two mean the world to me, sweetheart."

"You have separated bedrooms. Kyle said that only divorced parents do that!"

"Kyle," Steve says the name like it's a curse. "I swear, I'm going to cause mayhem if Carol doesn't get that brat to behave himself."

"Steve-"

"What? This is the fourth time he's said something that's upset our girl!"

"He's a dumb kid." Eddie pulls Robin off Steve's lap, into his arms. He sticks out his tongue when Steve tries to complain. "Do you wanna know why me and mama have separate rooms?"

Robin nods, looking more confused than distressed. She slaps his shoulder when he tries to walk ahead, making him wait for Steve to get up so she can hold his hand whilst Eddie carries her to Steve's room.

"Ok, birdy. How would you describe mamas room?"

She hesitated, looking around. "Pretty?"

"Exactly. So pretty, all these pastels and whites. Very bright and happy, right?" He waits for her to nod, before walking them across the hall and into his room. "Would you say my room is pretty?"

"No!" Her face scrunches up. "It's all dark and scary!"

"You wouldn't want to be in here too much, would you?"

"No! I only come in here if you and mama are. It's not nice or pretty."

"Mama wouldn't like being in here too long either, would he?"

She looks to Steve, understanding slowly dawning on her face. "Mama doesn't like your room either, he told me."

"Robin!"

Eddie laughs, loudly, bouncing her so she laughs. "I know, baby. But, you know, I don't like mamas room either. It's all so bright and I like this; dark and scary."

"We take turns," Steve adds. "We get our own space, but we never sleep alone. Not if we can help it."

She's quiet as she thinks about it. "Ok. I don't think I understand it yet but... that makes sense. I need to think about it."

"Is that my cue to put you down?"

"Yeah! We can party later, this is more important."

As soon as he puts her down, she darts off into her room.

Steve snorts at how hard she slams the door. "She's just like Robs."

"Maybe we should've named her after El."

"Maybe. She'd be a better role model."

"I'm telling Robin you said that."

"Go on, she'll agree with me. Why do you think she refuses to babysit anymore?"

"Ah, can't handle a taste of her own medicine."

Steve hums, finally stepping closer, arms curling around Eddie's waist. "I missed you."

"Missed you more, big boy."

[lemonandlime22]

Twisted wonderland character react to mother Mc that came to wonderland with a baby If it is ok you don’t have to if you don’t want to

Parent!Yuu coming to Twisted Wonderland with their child

Warning(s): teen parent reader, cussing, not edited

A/N: You didn't specify what characters so its just ganna be general hc. Keeping it gn cause I dont write fem readers rn.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Grim opens you coffin and finds you holding a crying baby then slowly closes it

both you and ya kid have your own robes and Grim tries to convince you to him him your baby's.

Crowley passes out thinking that the black carriage just picked up two kids and your parents were going to sue him all to hell

then you tell him that its your child and he's all better

cause you can't sue him :).

Grim always refers to himself when around the baby as uncle Grim

he will cry if the bbys first words aren't his name.

The ghost will babysit for you a lot, their its unofficial godparents

they also like to put the baby back to sleep when they cry I the middle of the night.

Train gives you some pointers on random parenting things, he also is happy to last minute babysit for you when you have pop quizzes or anything like that

same with most of the other teachers,

Vargas will do little baby exercises with them while you run laps or wtf you have to do that day

Crowley would offer to help, but please be my the responsible choice and never leave him alone with your child.

You two are always welcome to unbirthday parties, Trey will make baby food for them or baby friendly foods he also will be happy to teach you how to properly brush their teeth

Deuce and Ace love playing and entertaining them, Cater take so many pics of them

Riddle tries his best to get along with the baby but it's very awkward, which is also rly cute.

Take them to Leona and he'll throw yall out, he already has one brat to deal with he doesn't want another.

Ruggie will give you some easy food recopies for you to make that the baby can have

Jack will babysit in the early mornings on occasion by taking them out for a run with him in one of those chest/back strap things.

Do not on any occasion let Floyd hold your baby, he will throw them up into outer space!

Jade will try to give them some mushrooms so just to be safe keep your distance with him too

Azul will have war type flashbacks from seeing you chubby baby.

Kalim is spoiling the shit out of your child, he's also happy to babysit he's got more experience then most with how many little siblings he has

Jamil doesn't mind being around the mushy thing if it's not annoying.

Epel LOVES them! their just the right amount of chaos he needs to stay sane, plus they might remind him of some of the kids in his family or home town

Rook is another happy babysitter, likes to put his hat on them even though its way to big for them

keep the tf away from Vil, on his request

especially if they have ever or have come close to fucking up his makeup or hair or anything like that.

Ortho enjoys playing with them, he thinks their so interesting, also would love to hang out with them but Idia refuses to allow kids

especially babies

anywhere near his room.

Be carful, Lilia might try to adopt them, maybe both of you and he'll be a grandpa

he hasn't decided yet

he also might try and teach them to call him grandpa and Silver uncle

also for some reason, prob the animals that are always around him, your kid loves Silver

Sebek contently makes your baby cry cause of how loud he is, he also yells/scolds at them if they ever cry while Lilia or Malleus hold them

Malleus is basically their unofficial dad, he adores them and spending time with them, even giving them gifts

not just toys tho like things they need

this man even reads parenting books!

fuck after a while he might even start a collage fund for them.

Anyway-

Good luck raising your kid here!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[redstringraven]

for the tmnt 40th anniversary: 23 and 32!

\TwT/ !!! thank you much!

TMNT's 40th anniversary ask game!

23.) what is one of your favorite TMNT fics?

ough, i'm admittedly very, very bad at reading fanfic for a few reasons: 1) since i'm also a creator, i often have to decide if i want to use what free time i have creating or engaging with art made by others, and i often opt for the former; 2) i'm an extremely slow reader partially due to how i learned to read, because of this i'm usually pickier about where i put my reading time (if i schedule myself any); 3) i refuse to read fic if i'm not on my desktop with my firefox extension that lets me use the floaty comment box, because it brings me joy to leave lengthy, thorough comments. i love leaving the types of comments i'd like to receive, and my brain gets very cranky when i can't. all this to say, i haven't read a lot of tmnt fanfic since circling back to one of my childhood fandoms. ene i'm trying to be better about it because i very much believe in supporting community, i just... haven't quite gotten around to a rhythm that works for me yet, i guess. not for a lack of wanting, tho. however! i love In The Shelter of Each Other, by @hamstermastersamster; as well as Anger and Management, by @halogalopaghost; and I'll Be Ok!, by @joyfuladorable. just to name some! i also remember a fic from my childhood where raph was babysitting... someone's kid (might've been april's?) and he taught them that if something was an "ouch" that meant it could hurt you and you shouldn't touch it. so, the oven was an "ouch". i don't remember the title because i was, like, fourteen, but i remember that specific detail and loved it very much. shout out to that author. i've also got a few fics i'm reading/trying to keep up with that are still in progress, but i've barely scratched the surface on them because... again. i am slow. lD;; but i am also trying. bless those who're patient with me. i'm so, so sorry.

32.) what was the first thing you've made for TMNT?

i might have stuff from my high school years lying around here somewhere, but you'll have to pay me to post it. i wish i could say i was kidding, but college shot my relationship with my art in the foot. <xD i have a folder of stuff before 2018 that's referred to as "the otherworld" for a reason. we do not venture into that fog... silent hill... but! i'll share some of the first sketches i did in my circle-back. please tolerate the shit phone-photo quality; my phone is obsolete to the point several of my apps will literally no longer open due to incompatibility with the OS. i'll also share the first round of sketches i actually published, so you can see the private sketchbook testings verses me being like "i need to make myself put something out there, here it is".

here's the link to the above published post! really is wild how after i started drawing them more regularly, my own style quickly dug its little fangs in and never looked back. xD;;

[celeluwhenfics]

Since we’re talking horse girl histories and you’ve already let slip the FASCINATING detail that you were once a horse-mounted sheep herder, would you also like to share more about your time as a horse girl? Inquiring minds would love to know whatever you feel like putting out there! ♥️

This is a long overdue reply! Thanks for the ask, and for your patience... Here we go, story time! Be ready for a long rant and too many horse pictures.

Basically, from age 8, I've been that girl completely obsessed with horses. After consistently nagging my parents, I got to get weekly riding lessons and sometimes a summer camp week. (Lucky kid, I know!)

One of my first lessons, wasn't this boy GORGEOUS?! His name was Monty. Not from Monty Python, but from Monty Roberts.

I got to the point where I could volunteer at the stable without being too much of a nuisance, and I participated in two very small jumping competitions. However at age 12 or 13 I decided to stop, being busy with a ridiculously demanding school. This is also when I started being much more serious about piano. (Which is another story entirely!)

Capturing the essence of being an 11yo horse girl in the year 2000. The tshirt says "Harry Pony"

Fast forward to when I was 22, I somehow got a little money of my own, and for some reason, my very first thought was, HORSES. So I got back into it, fell a couple times pretty hard, and became just as obsessed as I had ever been, if not more.

In parallel to doing my MA, I mucked for lessons, assisted a friend trainer, read lots, had a half-pension for a couple months, and sometimes assisted in "babysitting" entire barns for a couple days when the owners were on holiday. I did some jumping, but I was most interested in dressage. I never got to a super good level as a rider, but I really got a good variety of experiences.

I adored this guy I had in half-pension in 2013... He sent me flying through that fence a couple times, but he was the best. Sapporo ❤️

Then I was incredibly lucky that my MA advisor was a horse girl too, and she invited the whole class to retreat seminars on a farm which had about 80 Icelandic horses. My heart exploded for these little guys. I would visit that place (aka paradise) as often as I could. This blessed farm and the lovely family that owns it is the inspiration for the Aldburg paradise in which the pHORSEuasion flashbacks will happen...

I learned Icelandic, and I organized that the summer after I finished my MA (like literally 48 hours after defending), I flew to Iceland to soak in its unique horse culture.

First, I volunteered at the annual horse competition, Landsmót Hestamanna, and saw some of the THE most impressively gorgeous horses the country had to offer, in a surreal scenery, and under a sun that Would. Not. Set.

Then I went on a 1-month intensive language course in Reykjavík, slept little, did too much grammar, broke up with an annoying boyfriend, and tried speaking with locals. But after that the real thing started.

I moved to a sheep breeding farm in the North East (aka edge of the world, super isolated, big nearby metropolis is a 300 people village), that had been looking for an au-pair to help with farm work, guesthouse work, babysitting, and horse riding. I stayed there for only two months, but oh boyy. I don't even know where to start with sharing this experience.

But it will be for another post!

Btw my DMs are always open if anyone has horsey questions or would like some horsetopic-specific beta-ing when writing about Rohan, if you need help with some research of if you want to make sure that a riding scene is realistic! I'm not a horse professional but as you can guess I've been through some stuff... 😅

[immeasurablesaladagere]

Hello salad 🫶 Can I please get some little Taub or Park headcanons please? My underrated kings 🙏

I'll do both!

Taub

Is a middle regressor with an age range of 12 to around 16.

In his ✨💀emo phase💀✨ almost all the time when he's regressed. If he has a say in what he's wearing than it's all black with band T-shirts, skull accessories, too many bracelets, and beanies. He might even get into dark eye makeup if he's feeling fancy that day.

His teenager brain really hates being bald. Almost never without a hat.

Actually becomes really good at using liquid eyeliner when he's regressed, and that skill doesn't transfer to when he's big somehow.

Very "stereotypical 80's movie teen". Kind of has an apathetic "ugh, whatever" attitude about most things and doesn't like being told what to do, lots of demand avoidance.

He is willing to help caregivers out with babysitting though. He pretends he doesn't care but he does and everyone knows it.

"Taub, turn the music on your iPod down, you'll hurt your ears!" - Wilson, yelling

"Yeah whatever, Mom!" - Taub, yelling back (he turns it down secretly)

Stops liking coffee and switches to sugary energy drinks for his caffeine intake instead. He also consumes much more caffeine while regressed if no one stops him.

Most of his emotional woes are being chronically unhappy with his life choices and having a simultaneous quarter and mid-life crisis at the same time.

Touchy about his appearance, as all self-conscious teens.

Likes playing Mario and Legend of Zelda games.

Doesn't have stuffed animals, but he does have a lot of game/band keychains.

Owns a few fidgets like a fidget cube and a Rubik's cube, and has a little collection of magnets to mess with.

Journals (He insists it is not a diary)

-

Park

Little age anywhere from 2-8. She's usually all the way on one end or the other, but occasionally goes in-between.

Didn't know what the heck was going on with her when she first regressed starting in med-school because of the stress, and of course, being a med-student, she jumped to the worst possible conclusion and thought she had a brain tumour or something.

She just nervously sat on that information until her psych class discussed age regression, and then just went "Oh."

Regresses almost entirely involuntarily and due to stress or fear (she also regressed that one time she was on acid, only House really picked up on it). It doesn't happen very often, usually when she's sleep deprived and otherwise upset.

Has a box of the bare-minimum in the way of little gear. A pacifier that's light blue, a colouring book with some crayons, a white bear with a pink bow around its neck, and a little whiteboard list of self-care things so she remembers to actually do them.

Refers to her caregivers very respectfully, using Mr. and Mrs. for everything, or in the case of her coworkers, Doctor [name]. She will not stop calling them that even though they've said she doesn't have to.

Asks people bluntly if they can shut up so she can read her picture books.

The kind of kid where if you sit them down at those restaurants with the paper on the tables for colouring she'll do her best to make a masterpiece and impress the workers.

Will ask you why you look so ugly. She's not being mean, she genuinely wants to know. Absolutely no filter.

Rambles about her current interests and will just keep going if you don't stop her.

Her favourite caregiver is Cuddy, she likes to give her the pictures she draws.

Watches nature documentaries about the ocean and unironically watches the Telletubbies. She loves how creepy they look.

[do-u-ever-just]

WEEKLY WIP

Single dad Sasuke and his babysitter, Naruto. Sasuke has realised his feelings for Naruto are getting a little beyond professional, so he tries going on a first date to quell his suddenly active hormones. Obviously, it doesn't work.

This came out of me in a rush! I've decided to put all my time into finishing Drum Sticks and Rose Quartz first, but this is a fun little project you can expect more of!

Tags: SasuNaru, Age Gap, Single Father Sasuke, ft. the return of Sasaki!

Sasuke busies himself in the hallway mirror.  Fixing his hair.  Tugging his shirt straight.  Adjusting the black and silver rings on his fingers.  

“Woa, you look smart,” Naruto comments.  He’s picked Sasaki up and is windmilling him around the kitchen.  Sasaki giggles in utter delight.  “Another date night, huh?”

Sasuke bites his lip.  “Yeah, another date night.”

Naruto pauses.  “And you sound so excited about it.”  Sasaki is already pounding Naruto’s shoulders with his fists, demanding he keep spinning.  Naruto does.

Sasuke only shrugs.  “Would you think I’m cringe if I said I feel too old for first dates?”

Naruto laughs.  He stumbles, and grips the back of a chair to steady himself.  “Hey, I’m like nine years younger than you, and I feel the same way.”

“So, that makes me ancient?”

Naruto nods.  “Yeah, guess it does.  So you should be grateful you’ve found anyone in your old age.”

“Har har.”

Sasuke hopes he hid how hard his chest twinged at the reminder of their age gap.  Not that Naruto is underrage, god no.  He’s twenty-three, spry, and started babysitting for some extra cash while he attempted to finish his personal trainer course.  Sasuke found his name through a friend of a friend.  Truly, some gym-frat-looking-bro showing up on his doorstep was the last thing Sasuke had wanted of someone who would be put in charge of his son, but he had been desperate and unable to say no.

Naruto proved himself sent by angels.

He was clean, neat, polite (the bare minimum).  But he never drank alcohol in front of Sasaki, or even when Sasaki had been put to bed.  He would do his homework at the kitchen table until Sasuke got home.  He wasn’t a great cook, his meals mostly consisted of rice, chicken and broccoli, but he was always kind enough to make Sasuke a serving for his lunch the next day.  

Most importantly, Sasaki loved him.

Naruto would show him all the cheats on the video games he was playing, but kept it to a good ninety minutes at night, and never any time before bed.  He would teach Sasaki new words, read to him if he was having trouble sleeping, and had taught him how to play soccer in the courtyard just outside the townhouse.  

He walked him in the park, rugging him up on colder days, and bringing spare water on the hot ones.  

And he never accepted tips.

All Sasuke could do in return is pass his name on when others enquired about anyone good to babysit their own kids, which Sasuke was loathe to do.  He knew Naruto needed all the work he could get, but Sasuke felt a strange sense of possession over him, which was unowed and definitely unwarranted.

And Sasuke, a normal, human male with two perfectly working eyes, could never stop noticing how attractive Naruto was.  And how that was only enhanced everytime Naruto rushed to Sasaki with a tissue whenever he sneezed.  Or when Sasuke came home and the vacuuming had been done.  Or when Naruto cut his rate in half when Sasuke had mentioned he was hard for money.

Or the one time he had come home to Naruto, shirtless, feet hooked under the couch and doing sit ups in his living room.

Sasuke had almost passed out with the rush of heat that went straight to his groin, and an unfortunate realisation had come over him.  He wasn’t just physically attracted to Naruto anymore.  Which, in of itself, was its own problem.

Hence, the first date.

[thelediz]

Sonic Underground episode 22: Three Hedgehogs and a Baby

AKA: The required baby episode.

I’m watching Sonic Underground in search of inspiration to finish a fic I’ve been writing forever. It’s a sad state of affairs. See the recap of the first three episodes here, if you're interested!

The plot (for want of a better word): The Sonic Underground have found an abandoned baby in the streets! While Sonic and Sonia look for its parents, Manic bonds with the baby, wanting to give it the happy childhood he never had. Will Manic be able to give up his new-found family member when the time comes, or is there more to this lost child than anyone expects?

-side-eyeing my own synopsis-

Don’t act like this series has that much depth, LeDiz.

So from the very get-go, we are told that the baby for this episode is a robot intended to infiltrate the Underground.

Specifically Sanctuary. Wow. They mentioned it again. Friends, I am shook at this level of continuity.

Also, just a side-note here. Robotnik likes the sound of babies crying. Now, I know this is just oh-look-he’s-so-evil, but a fact of human biology here is that babies’ cries are specifically on a scale that humans are hard-wired to respond to. It makes us alert and reactive, whether we like kids or not. I’m not sure what this says about Robotnik that he enjoys it.

Just in case you haven’t seen Cyrus’ episode, they do explain that Sanctuary is where the ‘Freedom Fighters’ (that’s what they’re called today, not Resistance) raise their children to become adult Freedom Fighters. They make it sound like a boot camp. Yes I make something of this.

So, in today’s Robotocisation Is Horrifying reminder, the reason the triplets are on a mission today is to find plans to build a mico-robotocisor which is ‘no bigger than a pencil’. Put aside your questions of how robotocisation works for a second and freak out with me about how terrifying that would be to the general populace. You wouldn’t even know the cops could be carrying a device that would irreversibly take away your sentience, a punishment you can get for simply being on the wrong street at the wrong time.

CAN YOU HONESTLY IMAGINE.

No wonder the populace just fall in line.

The series, however, does not talk about the general populace because that’s scary. It’s just spies that would do this to Freedom Fighters. Which is probably exactly what Robotnik would tell the aristocrats. Sonia should be on his PR team.

Anyway. Anyway. The point is, SWATbots force them to finish up, and down an alley where Dingo-in-morphed-form and the robot baby are waiting. After some joking around from Manic, Sonia insists they take the baby.

Sonic, for Reasons, knows how to take care of a baby. Manic does not. Given that one of these boys had a somewhat normal single-child childhood (until his parents were arrested and his house was burned down and he was forced into a war and and) and the other one was part of a guild that apparently had a habit of stealing babies off the street… this is odd to me. But we move on. It’s just because Sonic isn’t the focus of this episode so he’s on Responsible Big Brother Duty to contrast Manic having to learn and grow.

To further push this, Sonia and Sonic basically say ‘not it’ to babysitting, while Manic is left behind. I was going to question this choice from a responsibility standpoint, until I actually thought about the consequences of Manic being the one to ask around for parents. You know, the guy whose contacts made a habit of stealing babies off the street. So you know what, I’m gonna give Sonia this one, I am.

This baby!robot is incredibly lifelike. Parenting classes in Mobius must be super effective.

I will admit, Manic and the baby bonding with the drum kit is very sweet.

However, his decision to name the kid and going through ‘Bertram’ and ‘Chauncy’ before hitting on ‘Hip’ is a strange road. Naming practises in Mobius are weird.

There’s some actual world building here that you’re supposed to notice, which is always nice to see. The triplets discuss what they’ll do with the baby, and Manic says they’ll take it to Sanctuary, only for Sonia to say they’re too busy and will instead leave it with an Underground Shelter. We assume this is like the seedy bar Sonic was in for Cyrus’s episode. Manic points out they get raided all the time. It’s just all… mm. This episode is feeding me, friends.

And once again, Sonic warns Manic off from doing stuff on his own. Because Manic is the squishy wizard that shouldn’t be alone. Manic would so easily have had an arc of resentment in the series, it would have been SO EASY.

The song: Being a Kid is Cool. 60s pop with nostalgia. It’s adorable and The Wiggles would probably have approved.

And then Manic ignores Sonic’s warning to head toward Sanctuary anyway. Robotnik orders the SWATbots to follow.

Sonic and Sonia, however, see the SWATbots leaving. They’re too mission-focussed to follow, but they note it, reassuring us that they’ll catch up as soon as they finish realising that the micro-robotocisor was always a fake idea. Which. Look. It’s reassuring that Robotnik isn’t actually capable of building something like that, but the fact they genuinely thought he WAS says a lot about how scared everyone is of the Egg-boy.

But anyway, we have plot to continue on with.

Robotnik has trapped Sonic and Sonia in ‘electro-shackles’ on their ankles and therefore caught them. But he does not do the smart thing and immediately get Sonic in a robotocisor.

I guess since he’s got 2 of 3 and Manic’s easy pickings he figures he’ll wait for the full set?

It’s very very stupid. Because he doesn’t even take the medallions away. Their magic doesn’t work on the shackles, but Sonic (who is not an idiot this episode, in contrast to last) instead uses them to blast the room instead and take out the power. Which… obviously?

It leads on to a hoverboard race, with Sleet’s SWATbot armada chasing down Sonic and Sonia, who are chasing down Manic. Dingo makes his move, the baby is dropped, Manic freaks out, Sonic and Sonia are busy fighting SWATbots, Dingo falls off too and Sleet has to save him because they are partners underneath it all – there’s a lot going on in the space of about twenty seconds.

And that's it. The episode ends on another bittersweet moment, with Manic entertaining some Sanctuary kids, and the siblings checking in on him.

Like with a lot of these episodes, I don’t feel like anyone learned anything. There was no story progression, no character evolution, but you can kind of see what they were going for, and again, you can kind of see how they could have achieved it with just some slightly different narrative choices. Something about Manic not having sympathy for Sanctuary kids, but learning it through this, or… something.

I don’t know. It’s weird. But… full of moments. And I think that’s part of why I enjoy the Trashfire. Overall, it’s terrible, but there are moments.

Let’s see if we can find some more tomorrow…

[semper-legens]

181. Shadow Wave, by Robert Muchamore

Owned: No, library Page count: 343 My summary: James' final mission is set to be a normal CHERUB mission - babysit the kids of some bigwig for a bit. Mundane, but at seventeen James isn't the prime CHERUB agent anymore. But when his old roommate Kyle comes in with a lot of information about his client's past, James and Kyle start hatching a new plan of their own. Protesting is far easier when you know your target's every move… My rating: 3/5 My commentary:

The final CHERUB book! Or, at least, the final book that I'm going to be covering here, as this is the last of James Adams' CHERUB career. He's seventeen now, so close to ageing out of the CHERUB programme, and needs to start thinking about his future and his career. This is the book that wraps it all up, and once again the narrative makes some weird decisions with regards to its focus and exactly what it puts emphasis on. But anyway. I've not got much today for preamble, so let's get into it!

Again, we have this very strange decision where the book isn't actually about the kids we've been following this whole time. About a quarter of the book is taken up with some flashbacks including Kyle helping out with basic training when he meets Aizat, a local Malaysian kid whose village is being destroyed and bought out by an oligarch named Tan Abdullah. That's the man whose kids are being protected by CHERUB in the present day. And a large part of those flashbacks involves a reporter who Kyle has contacted investigating Abdullah's exploitation in the area, once again following a character we've never met before rather than our main character in the final book of the series. I'd have thought that this book would pick up on the Brigands thread from the last book - something that doesn't rely on exposition, so we can use the time to explore our established characters a bit better. But no, the Brigands mission is wrapped up in a pretty anticlimactic way in the early parts of this book, and the main mission that this book focuses on is the babysitting mission with Abdullah's kids that James turns down. It's just a weird choice.

Anyway, James turns down the mission, but decides to help Kyle protest Abdullah on the sly. It's not a CHERUB operation or a sting operation in general, so the outcome we're working towards seems a bit fuzzy, which makes the way that the book wraps up seems odd. After being protested all day, and after reporters were digging into his career, Abdullah decides to flee with his family and ends up shooting himself. It just seems all too neat a conclusion, for a mission like this. Adullah takes himself out of the picture, so everything is fine. We don't get much on what happens to Aizat or his community or other communities like it, but that's not really what this book was going to be about? I'm also side-eyeing the character decisions made. James has never shown much of a conscience before, so him taking a stand is admirable, even if it does ring a bit hollow in the fact that he's soon to be leaving CHERUB, and cancelling on the mission has no real negative impact on him. Lauren's reasons for staying on the mission, meanwhile, are sound - she's earlier in her career than James, and if she turns down something easy like this she won't get juicier missions. But then all of that is undercut with another character saying she just wants to go shopping with the rich kids, which strikes me as a strange beat largely because Lauren is the one with the conscience - she's the principled veggie after the animal rights mission, after all. Odd characterisation.

So, what do I make of CHERUB as a whole? It's been largely a disappointing return for me, sadly. The series has some strange ideas of morality, and overall paints things as being a bit too black and white for my liking with casting antagonists as out-and-out villains or protagonists as uncomplicatedly good despite the ethics of each situation being far more complex. James as a character really suffers from what I can only assume was an effort to make him more appealing to the typical teenage boy, meaning that he's wildly homophobic and misogynistic in a way that isn't challenged by the narrative in a satisfactory manner. The choice to have most of the non-mission story be taken up with relationship drama is largely uninteresting, mostly because that kind of teen-soap-opera nonsense is at odds with the spy thriller genre of the books. While CHERUB as an organisation could be an interesting idea for a narrative, the fact that its ethics aren't satisfactorily examined in the story lead it to feel more like copaganda than anything else. That's not to say there's nothing to enjoy here - I did enjoy the books, and I carried on with the series to completion - but overall I don't remember it as well as I did, and that makes me a little sad, not gonna lie.

Next, time for some Doctor Who, and adventures with the Ninth Doctor.

[someonewhos-world]

TWIN HEADCANONS

Slow ass tumblr isn't gonna stop me

>Jett and Jack are Puerto Rican and Italian

>Jett babysits for a family that lives a floor under their apartment and Jack tags along bc he loves to tire out the kids while Jett takes care of the baby.

>Three cats,one dog, two boys and one very overworked mom? Giant nap pile in the living room.

>Jack works nightshifts which works bc hes a night owl but also really bad bc he has school the very next day but also good bc less people yk

>Jett sticks to the babysitting, it feeds into his napping habits because by the time the parents show up, it's just this scary looking teenager on their couch, baby against his side with its head supported on his elbow and two kids watching old cartoons like looney tunes or Tom and Jerry.

>They did eventually move back to New York after a few years, they loved Canada but New York will always be their home.

>BROOKLYN BABIES they live by old Fulton by the waters.

>Internshipping with Chris?? Yk how he forgot to feed the interns that one episode? Yeah, Jett was running on a caffeine high and Jack was foaming at the mouth like an animal with rabies bc he had too much candy.

>those crashes were the worst bc they looked dead and it took a while to recover

>Genderswapped tho???

>Jess' cats are the dumbest motherfuckers known to man. They somehow end up in Canada at Jody's place for food.

>Jace's cat is the only normal one. Mostly. If it isnt the middle of the night.

>Back to normal, them cats are crazy but they also have a dog. His name is Wally :3

>The boys love their pets, although Jack wont stop feeding the pigeons outside so ig they have birds too.

>Jack came out those sewers dressed like a ninja turtle and Jett pulled up with a hotdog.

>The twins didnt use the steel wool rope Cheis had. They're new Yorkers. New Yorkers find ways to graffiti on trains that are in the air and on buildings they probably dont live in.

>wait

>sorry I remembered how a lady climbed onto the statue of Liberty in protest. Bc the twins scamper up the statue like squirrels.

>Jett definitely has blackmail on people. Because he talked to Sierra.

>Jack is still afraid of Sierra. Very afraid. Jett is mostly indifferent now but. He can feel the glare sometimes on his back when he talks to Cody.

>genderswapped twins are the same. No matter the gender, the twins fear Sierra and her strength. Never her height, they think shes cool for being tall but they fear her strength and mindset. She's unpredictable and they grew up with unpredictable. They dont like her.

>when Jett naps, Jack sits with him and the cats join. Wally joins too but he wakes Jett up by accidentally smothering him bc hes a very big dog.

>Jack never naps, hes running on sugar and a will to live.

>Jett runs on one iced vanilla frappuccino.

>Jack can be very mean, when push comes to shove. Hes gonna shove and hes gonna shove hard. He will defend people and wont hesitate to get nasty

>Jett has a soft side, he's open to those who need a shoulder to vent to. He'd have his headphones on but when he tilts his head towards you, you know hes listening.

>they dont know how weather works. Not all the time.

That's all I have for today!! I'll reblog this and add more when I come up with more!! You're also open to make headcanons of your own about the twins or ask about them!!

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

054 of 2023

Do you have a reason to smile right now?

Yeah, I just came back from the sea. It was very windy, but awesome.

Do you start the shower water before or after you get in?

Before. We need our boiler to warm it up for, like, two minutes before it gets hot.

True or false: Your not sitting on a chair to use the computer right now.

True, I’m not.

Do you regret any of your past relationships?

I feel they’ve taught me something, but I only regret wasted months.

How many times have you been to a museum?

I can’t count, but I’ve only been to one in the city I live in.

How has this past week been for you?

Awesome. I travelled a bit around the province and beyond.

Is anything going to happen next month that makes you happy?

Hopefully. We’ll see.

Are you going to be getting any new pets soon?

Probably not. We already have two.

Do you like the rain?

Nah I hate rain. Belgium is rainy by nature and I just can’t get used to it.

Do you like it when stores have sales?

Who doesn’t? Always nice to save some money.

Would you rather be a Panda or Grizzly bear?

Panda, they look cool.

Do you have any of your Easter candy left over?

What? Easter was almost a year ago. I don’t have special candy for that occasion, too. We never buy it.

Is there someone on your mind that shouldn’t be?

Yeah, M. I can’t help it.

Does your ex make you mad?

No, we’re great friends.

Will you talk to someone on the phone tonight?

Why would I?

Do you like BBQ sauce?

I do, but as far as I know, every company has its own recipe.

Do the stairs in your house have carpet?

No, they don’t.

What were you doing at 9 AM this morning?

Stressing out about that door banging situation.

Can you do a twirl like a ballerina?

LMAO.

Would you rather eat 12 hot dogs or 6 hamburgers?

Either, but not in that amount omg. I barely eat.

What color is the door to your basement?

We don’t have any basement. Cellars in Belgian houses are a rarity.

Was your favorite class science because of the experiments?

Not only. By the way, we don’t have science classes in my country. We habve separete biology, chemistry, physics and all.

Do you like citrus pop or any drinks?

Yeah, Schweppes Citrus Mix is pretty cool.

Last time you wore the opposite sex’s clothing?

Never. I’m not a crossdresser.

What’s the last board game you played?

I don’t remember, must have been years ago.

What laundry detergent do you use?

Formil.

Do you trust people too easily?

No. I don’t trust people at all, unless I know them well.

Are you currently fighting with someone?

Not that I know of.

Do you hang out with your siblings friends?

No, we live too far from each other.

Last time you had butterflies in your stomach?

I don’t think I ever did. Maybe something close to it, last year with M.

Have you ever kept anything wild as a pet?

No, unless my cats count as wild XD

Do you set good examples for little kids?

Pffft. Not in the eyes of conservative people.

Does your favorite song mention a famous person’s name in it?

I don’t think so.

Are you counting down the days to anything?

Visiting my parents again, but we don’t know yet when it will happen.

Does your house have a pool?

LMAO XD it’s a tiny house built probably two centuries ago or something.

If you broke your computer, would you be able to fix it by yourself?

Easily. My secondary school diploma is computer technician.

On a scale 1-10, how much does the opposite sex confuse you?

11. Women are so complicated, and I don’t mean it in a wrong way.

When you party, do you get wild?

I used to get drunk a lot, but not anymore.

If you found a wallet full of money, what would you do?

Give it back to the owner. I always try to be fair.

Do you do cheers often?

What is that even?

Do you enjoy fishing?

No, I don’t.

Was your first job babysitting?

Thankfully not.

Did you wear a hoodie today?

I always wear a hoodie, unless it’s hot outside.

Are you embarrassed to talk about stuff with your dad?

No. I’d rather talk to him than to my mum. He’s a man like me, after all.

Taylor Swift or Carrie Underwood?

No.

[missmeinyourbones]

jjk characters x icks!

the ick saga continues but this time its applied to the jjk characters :3 you can read my aot icks here and here :) in conclusion, they are all so so SO embarrassing, your honor 

yuuji

fully says saturdays are for the boys. like genuinely uses it as an excuse. ur like babe i found this really cute ramen place i wanna try, lets go on saturday for lunch :D and hes like im sorry baby but saturdays are for the boys, i have plans w megumi and toge😕 he definitely has a tapestry that says it hanging in his dorm room, when you guys move in together after college he half jokingly suggests hanging it up in the living room, you make him burn it

is an ipad baby. always on his damn ipad. he cant focus on anything without simultaneously playing a game on it. ur watching a tv show together and he is watching it, but hes also playing candy crush. you are in the bathroom getting ready for bed and hes already in bed playing subway surfers. he also never cleans the screen so its so greasy and has crumbs in the crack of the buttons / case 

hes a sneaker head LMFAO he is so annoying about his shoes. has like 100 pairs of sneakers. ones he only wears to work out, ones he wears on special occasions, ones in certain colors, ones from certain athletes. he REFUSES to let you even breathe near them. places them so delicately on the doormat of your apartment and then gets mad when you just kick off ur own shoes and they almost hit his. “BABE DONT CREASE THOSE IVE ONLY WORN THEM 5 TIMES” 

megumi

REFUSES to order at starbucks because he hates the way their sizes are named. you guys go to starbucks together and ur like can u get me a venti iced coffee??? and hes like ok is that a medium or a large. and when you tell him to just say venti he gets irrationally annoyed. “its so stupid that i cant just say large? why would i say venti? grande literally means big in spanish and its equivalent to a small?” idk baby i didnt make the menu <3

he never waits for hot foods to cool down. he just immediately takes a bite and then does that icky thing where his mouth is open and he’s breathing so fucking loud so it cools down in his mouth LMFAO BYE he looks so stupid. and you would think he’d be like a normal person and wait for it to cool down a little before he takes his second bite but hes an idiot!!! and does it again!!!! and repeats until the food is either gone or at room temp!!!!!

makes fun of what you watch but low key watches it with you and likes it??? but hes too stubborn to ever admit it so he has to pretend to make fun of it as you watch it so he can continue to see what happens LMFAO. ur watching a cheesy show like teen wolf and hes like “this show is so stupid and not realistic.” hes all “teenagers don’t even look like that, those are 30 year olds” and “this is so cringey why would they make that a plotline” so ur like OKAYYYYY then leave🙄 and he just pouts but continues to watch it because he needs to know how the season finale plays out 

nobara

this bitch laughs at the most inconvenient times and everyone around her is like😐 shes ordering ur guys food through a drive through and literally cannot get the order out bc shes laughing so hard for no reason???? the person taking the order is not amused thru the box and u get so embarrassed that you have to take over lmfao. she also does this when presenting something in class. shes just laughing and giggling and looking at her friends in the audience. BE SERIOUS BABES PLS

cannot apologize. says “i’m sorry you misunderstood what i meant” or “im sorry that you feel that way” whenever you are mad or upset with her. FOR THE LIFE OF HER cannot put herself in your shoes for the sake of an argument. will go to the grave thinking that she was 100% correct and that you were overreacting or took it too personally 

she says that she is “really good w kids!!!�� but in reality gets violently bullied by them LMFAO you guys are babysitting your cousins or something and shes hyping herself up, talking about how great she is with them, how smooth the night is gonna go, and you get there and they just completely humble her. say her haircut is ugly and her clothes are weird and that she smells. she pouts for the rest of the night and ur like baby theyre 6 and shes like “thats how you know its true, they dont have a filter they just speak the truth :///” 

gojo

refuses to ask for help in any capacity. so fucking stubborn about it. imagine him following instructions he found on google for how to fix ur washing machine and getting mad LMFAO like he kicks it and throws the screws around while sighing loudly. ur finally like satoru please lets just call someone, like a professional, whose literal job it is to do stuff like this. hes hurt that you would even suggest that lol

claps when planes land i literally hate him so much LMFAO he thinks hes doing it ironically but it does not come across that way AT ALL. hes whooping and hollering from the window seat as the plane slowly descends and ur hiding ur face in embarrassment next to him. as you guys gets off the plan he personally shakes the pilots hand and is like “thank you so much for your service, for safely landing us, for letting us live another day” and you have to pull him by his ear to get him to stfu 

looks at himself in every reflection he passes. EW i hate him. he physically cant help himself from looking in every single reflective surface he sees. he passes the mirror in your hallway??? checks his hair. walking by a display window in the mall??? smiles at his reflection. he has no shame. its so humiliating to see him from afar checking himself out

getou

tries so fucking hard to be funny in class that it comes off as such a force. this man wants to be the class clown so bad hes shaking in his seat waiting for the right opportunity to say something. hes gotten a few chuckles a handful of times, but most of the time no one laughs and the prof is like ...anyways 

thinks driving his car fast is a flex.... bye LMFAO like purposefully revs his engine thinking its gonna make the girls panties drop. goes 80 in a 45 because he thinks it makes him look cool and dangerous???? living for the bad boy aesthetic but he just looks like a dick lol 

falls asleep right after sex. yes im saying it. he doesnt do it in a mean way, its not like he doesnt care enough to check in on you or talk to you. he is just an exhausted man LMFAO. you roll over to crack a joke or something and hes already out like a light. put his ass to sleep now he calling me nyquil type beat 

nanami

thinks a “natural makeup look” is a full face with no colored lipstick LMFAO like he does not know what makeup looks like. so when he sees a picture of kendall jenner with a full face of natural makeup hes like “i love when women wear no makeup, shes so beautiful bare faced” like she doesnt have full coverage foundation and fake lashes on??? you guys are out getting lunch or something and you have ur usual makeup on but a little lighter (maybe no eyeliner or lipstick) and hes like you look so pretty naturally today :) ENOUGH

going to the gym is his only personality trait. hes the guy that carries around a gallon of water for no reason???? like not a special water bottle, but a genuine plastic poland springs gallon straight outta the supermarket??? just so everyone knows that he works out?? only eats grilled chicken, white rice, and broccoli every single night for dinner. his friends go out to eat and get pizza and hes like “...you know thats bad for you, right?” shut up meathead. 

he has a wallet phone case LOLLLLL like the velcro or magnetic kind thats leather and holds your phone and your money/cards. major dad/grandfather energy. it also has a touchscreen pen attached to it so he “doesnt get his screen dirty.” gets mad when you don’t use the pen. ur in public and hes like can you check my phone to see if gojo texted me and you go to slide it open and hes like “...with the pen”

inumaki

LONG ASS NAILS THAT HE DOES NOT CUT OFTEN ENOUGH. theyre not even dirty or grimey they are just long???? sometimes he bites them off and then they are all jagged and uneven and he accidentally scrapes you when he’s rubbing your back or scratching ur head :/ refuses to let you actually file them or cut them with clippers because its “too high maintenance” or “why would you when i could just do it with my teeth?” barbaric

also puts his cold ass feet on ur shins when ur going to bed. i can feel myself gagging while writing this. ur in bed and its all warm and snuggly and just as ur about to drift off to sleep he puts his COLD ASS DOGS ON UR CALVES???? like fully pressed up against ur legs. he’s happy bc ur warming him up but you feel like you have two nasty ice cubes tangled between ur legs now 

still plays among us and makes imposter jokes :/ *crowd boos* but he doesnt even do it in a funny ironic way he does it in a hes deadly serious way. like finds a picture of a dog looking guilty and sends it to you being like “when the imposter is sus XD” he is so embarrassing goodnight 

maki

the type to try waaaaayyyyyy too hard in gym class. like yells at you in dodgeball if you are not breaking a sweat or giving it ur all (maki baby i’m just trying to pass the class) her face is red and she’s sweating bullets and when you are on her team and get out she's genuinely livid. as if winning a gym class dodgeball game means anything????? 

she is so stingy when it comes to certain things. like the heat in your apartment. shes a dad w the thermostat. you are freezing and the thermostat says 60 and ur like babe its winter lets turn the heat on and shes like “no, we dont need to pay for the heat, put a sweater on” or you guys go out to eat and she’s letting you get whatever you want but then when it comes to her shes like “just water and the free bread is fine” BABY WHAT??? 

doesnt wash her face. her skin is really nice and you are jealous. but DOESNT WASH HER FACE??? you guys are getting ready for bed and you have all of your skincare out and shes like wtf is all of this and you explain the differences between toner and moisturizer and all that fun stuff and then she hits you with “huh, i just use water” WDYM U JUST USE WATER  

yuuta

never knows which way a door opens LMFAOOOOO PLEASE like its either push or pull. he has a 50% chance each time, but he somehow always gets it wrong. imagine him walking into a store and he goes to pull the door and stumbles back a little bit because its a push to open BYE

makes pic collages of you guys and posts them on ig :/ like do you remember in middle school when it was cool to make a flipagram for ur friends birthday? yeah🙂 he does that put for like every simple activity you guys do. hes like heres a flipagram of me and y/n when we went to the aquarium the other day <3 and its just awkward pics of you two w bad lighting lol. or he loves a good pic collage like the ones where you just make a grid of photos? he is an 11 year old little girl in 5th grade who just got an ipod touch 

yells stupid shit when he jumps into the pool LMFAOOOO like the most corny things. hes doing a cannonball and he genuinely says “GERONIMO!!!!” LIKE WTF IS WRONG W HIM???? also says “look out down below” or “incoming” then bellyflops right next to you when you were just trying to relax on a raft :/