#like can everyone stop comparing them
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i think franco did a wonderful job today !! he absolutely killed it and he should be proud of himself . i'm genuinely really glad to see that he's being treated well by williams and is getting the support a driver needs and deserves in this sport .
i also think what should be remembered is that logan didn't get to drive the same car franco is driving right now . and on top of that , jv's "support" of logan this year has been incredible fake and killed logan's confidence . he quite honestly didn't have a proper support system within that team .
franco is driving the williams car with all the upgrades , the same one alex has . logan was forced to drive a car with parts from 2023 . both the front wing and rear wing were from 2023 . a car that was overweight by 15 kilos (33 lbs) . a car that was already bad and only was made worse by the fact that it didn't have the same upgrades as alex did . a car that was absolutely impossible to drive and constantly had problems -- remember how often logan's steering wheel was messed up ??
logan's possibilities of an amazing performance were overshadowed by a car that would get upgrades only to have them promptly taken away . they were overshadowed by the fact that no one -- not even the goddamn commentators , whose JOB is to do the research that we are doing -- could properly do their research on what kind of a tractor logan was driving . everyone was under the immediate impression that logan had the same car as alex when that was the furthest thing from the truth .
and now franco is driving a car that is , indeed , finally equal to alex's car . a car that finally has all the upgrades . of course it's amazing that he's matching alex's pace and i am genuinely so happy for him for that ! but it should also be remembered that he's driving a car that is leagues better from what logan had to drive .
the way that everyone is automatically turning around to talk bad about logan and say "look !! look !! this guy is doing better than logan ever could do !! see !! logan does suck !!" is unfair to logan and shows a lack of proper research . it's truly gobsmacking to see how everyone jumps on the logan hate train and yet they refuse to do any substantial research to understand that logan was driving in a car that no driver could possibly succeed in .
i truly do hope that people realize in the future , specifically the near future , that logan was not treated properly this year . that people realize how logan was constantly given a shit hand and told to make something out of it when that was impossible considering the state the car -- and the team , i mean look at how they messed up with alex today ??? -- was in .
like don't even get me started on how williams messed up with alex today . that was just embarrassing on the team's end . absolutely insane what these drivers have to deal with .
#f1#logan sargeant#formula 1#formula one#williams racing#logan sargeant rants#he deserves the world#venus defends logan 𖦹*ੈ‧ 𓇼 ₊˚𓆝#venus rants about f1 ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡#pissed off ab this#like can everyone STOP comparing them#their situations are not the same#and i will die on that hill#ready to fight everyone for logan tbh#ls2#franco colapinto
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Hear me out (or don't... it's fine I'm just venting and mean) yeah um I don't believe Chakotay was saved in Prod*gy s2.
#the 'time travel' makes no sense when you think on it. What happened to Prime Chakotay? He got killed they showed that.#At the end s1 Janeway finds an 'alternate chakotay in an alternate timeline' and that's the one they go and get#we saw the original get merc'd in the message. That ACTUALLY happened. Lmao.....#They didn't prevent THAT death because they didn't go to THAT Solum with the Infinity and stop it from happening#instead it was 'ALTERNATE#' implying other.#OG Chakotay wasn't taken over by the alternative one either nothing suggests that was the direction for him in s2#they didn't do anything like 'well you see chakotay because at the end of s2 when we converged timestreams you have merged with your other'#if they did want to recover the original from s1 then keep that clear instead of being convoluted dont use an alternate timeline wtf#instead the plot was focused on gywns stupid fucking paradox plot and her being fixed#chakotay was the one in a paradox too did that not matter nah dw about it he had to die for this outcome or someshit lmao why#In the extended message given to admiral janeway it shows him clearly getting left behind and surrounded. Sadly no one intervened.#I dont understand why they couldnt have just made s2 about his rescue alone IF they took their time it wouldnt be so difficult#to follow#above that the one they rescued was ruined by the 10 year gap so he wasn't 'saved' at all. God i hate s2 when you break it apart#I dunno the more i look at s2 Janeway and Chakotay the more upsetting it is. Janeway would NOT have settled for an imposter.#everyone going goo-goo gaa gaa over s2 but it's sloppy af imo and undermines a huge portion voyagers struggles#id really like them to flatly lay out their ideas because literally nothing ive heard explains the story or choices of s2 with conviction#instead it's oh clap for wesley or the new vulcan and other references yay#describe to me your timetravel clearly and i'll happily take a seat on it (there is still other crap stuff mind you)#this is the most repressed shit i my head i swear#im angry because s1 is so clearly mapped out to a brilliant degree and for whatever reason it's not in s2#i can see through it#insultingly people are eating it up and claiming it's better than ever nah dawg embarrassing#there are nice ideas inside s2 but they arent adequately rewarded#it doesnt compare to the timetravel in other trek because they kept it clear#i mean it could have been an interesting parallel to endgame but in the end janeway didnt even rescue him lmao they dropped her#why bother building up this mission only for her to give up and go 'i'll hand it over because im told to'. Janeway had fuck all this season#let alone settle for not fixing her own timeline and her own friends deadly circumstance dw just grab another one from the shelf i guess#the emotional fallout was absolutely missed because they didnt elaborate on anything. Plenty of show but no substance from the characters
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unnerving to see people younger than me living their lives and doing adult stuff successfully. stop that you're supposed to eat ice cream for dinner and be unemployed
#stop making me look bad by having a husband and a baby rn you're 22 fr 😭#tho i do have two friends who got married at 18 and 21 and actually i look good compared to them bc everyone they know was like stoppppp#they dated for ike 4 months before getting engaged lmao#but some people who got married young are actually doing okay and normal and that makes me look bad lol#not necessarily always abt marriage tho#people younger than me with an actual career or grown up job make me feel this way also#anyway#every day im living a life indistinguishable from when i was a teenager and many people my age are already parents with mortgages and such#😐😐😐#anyway i spent my grown up job money on some flowers and now i have no job bc i let my mean supervisor bully me into quitting#i also spent grown up job money on an oven (successfully) and a car (unsuccessfully)#i am rlly just out here.... telletubby with a credit card fr#job just give you money and you can spend it on whatever you want (but watch out)#anyway car was a piece of garbage that couldn't pass inspection 😔#was so proud of myself paying cash for my first car but there's a reason it was that cheap lmao
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in honor of the new spider-verse movie i did a quick study of one of my favorite shots from the original !! <33
#my art#spiderverse#spider-verse#into the spider-verse#miles morales#i know everyone in the world has studied this shot! now i have too!#id like to spend more time on it next time i stopped after about 30 minutes so i mostly just carved shapes in#i think id also like to ! get some more different painting brushes bc i couldnt get a lot of the shapes i wanted#but it was fun trying to study this without color picking or directly drawing over the composition and everything#so i was just eyeballing it . ive been trying to figure out color relativity by Feeling it out so i wanted to do it this way#comparing them has been interesting ! i can see where i compressed some spaces of the composition#anyway it HAS been almost a year since i posted art here HAHA but well i just post for fun so it doesnt matter#if i posted ocs id have more art here but i prefer not to so you just get stuff whenever i make fanart#i would LOVE to do studies from the new movie but i dont have access to high quality screenshots yet#i actually did this as an exercise with one of my friends from college hehe we exchanged spiderverse screenshots to study#i also added some chromatic abberation you know just for fun . i made a version with it over the full piece but i thought well#i preferred it like this#anyway ! bye !
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😁
#not to still be on this sorry guys. but i guess what is making me Sad sad is like#everyone else's birthday regardless of who they are or how active they are in the group/groupchat. it's always someone at 12midnight on the#dot giving birthday cheer/wishes/etc#like literally even if the person has never spoken a word in the chat or if they aren't really friends anymore#and i'm active and supportive and i give so much and i literally got nothing. i waited all day and i watched people have discussions about#widget apps and fuckin. cheese.#all the while every time a notification popped up i thought “oh maybe this is it”#so it was just repeated disappointment. yes i set myself up for it and i take responsibility for that#i'm just so tired of not feeling (or frankly being. based on all this. and the 3 consecutive years of it. like last year i only got birthda#wishes after i said in the group chat that i bought myself something for my birthday)#valued at all beyond what *i* can do for *them*. i'm not a priority and i never have been and thats fine but like. goddamn. okay#maybe this is just my quote unquote wakeup call to stop offering so much of myself and my time for hashtag nothing#and i feel so childish and stupid to even still be thinking about this like who cares i had a really fun day/weekend#but it just would be nice. is all.#and i'm upset with myself for comparing the few nice individual messages i got eventually with the group cheer onslaught everyone else gets#bc those are valuable too.#but like. the last message in our announcements channel where ppl say happy birthday is literally a whole string of happy birthdays for thi#girl who has been making our lives Worse via making bad choices and then getting defensive when we say that for like. coming up on five yea#shes my friend and i support her but like. thats the thing i guess. that i'm getting at. shes my friend and i support her and i see Nothing#to suggest anyone else feels that way i fucking guess! idk again i feel stupid & childish here and i definitely need to just get over mysel#and i only got individual messages after i once again mentioned that it had been my birthday. like fully the day was over.#whatever it is not like i even care. i'm over it now this is me being over it#at the end of the day. they just forgot. i understand#i too forget things
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i dunno who fucking said it, if it was david c. or will buxton but they tried my baby (logan), comparing franco to logan talking about how franco was better and saying logan crashed more and shit, but they both can eat my shit and leave my baby ALONE .
- 🏎
REAL REAL REAL REAL REAL literally i don't understand how anyone thinks they can fairly compare logan and franco when logan never got to drive the car with upgrades (and when he got upgrades they took them away !) while franco is driving a fully upgraded car like come on 😭 and in general it's insane to me how vehemently people have been comparing franco , not just to logan but to other drivers , too !! like it not only makes me upset for logan and the other drivers being compared to him because ?? wtf ?? but it also makes me sad for franco because he didn't sign up for this kind of treatment .
i truly will never understand how people can think they can fairly compare franco with others , especially with logan , and the insane hate that people have towards logan . i cannot comprehend it and i don't think i ever will . i overall do not understand the hate that a lot of drivers get . perhaps it's because i have a lot of empathy for people and can understand different sides of things ,, but i just don't understand how hateful the f1 community has been recently . and that especially goes to how people have treated logan .
and the commentators making such comments and coming after logan even though its been a whole month since he got dropped is also insane to me . it's as though they have nothing else to talk about and their commentary will fall flat if they don't take a jab at logan . like , please , just move on . let him rest . let him go on to different motorsports series and show how good of a driver he is . they need to stop constantly bringing him up in such a negative way . he was their scapegoat then and he still is now , and it's pathetic and sad and disgusting .
and it's crazy to me how it's their job to know what's going on (who has upgrades , who doesn't , who is driving what car , etc.) and yet they never have any clue what the fuck is going on and make stupid comments . like y'all fucking SUCK at ur jobs if all you can comment on is negative things about logan . literally they need to do some damn research and open their eyes like us fans have been doing for so long 😭
also !! on a happier note -- oh my gosh hi race car anon !! this is my first ever emoji anon message i've ever gotten so this is genuinely so exciting to me 😭💞
#f1#logan sargeant#formula 1#formula one#williams racing#logie bear#logan sargeant rants#he deserves the world#the commentators are idiots#like genuine idiots#idk how they still have jobs#like truly they've got nothing up there#we should become the commentators tbh#also i hate the comparisons#and alex is getting compared to franco now too and getting hate for it#it makes me so sad :(#like can everyone stop comparing them#just stop the comparisons overall#they're so unfair#and so unnecessary#and so hateful ????#venus defends logan 𖦹*ੈ‧ 𓇼 ₊˚𓆝#venus answers ᝰ.ᐟ ༘
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Hey, I don't normally make my own posts about this, but.
Do not argue with an anti on their own terms.
Don't get me wrong, I get it. You see the hypocrisy. You see the way they take aim at your favorite ships or characters or tropes while enjoying something similar. And you think "if I can point out to them just how hypocritical and idiotic they look right now, everyone will see our argument, they'll see that the anti is wrong and a hypocrite, and then maybe more people will stop harassing the people who like my thing. Maybe the anti will see the light and stop being a hypocrite."
But it will not work. It will not work.
There is an extremely high chance one of two things will occur:
They will double down on their argument, and ignore what you've said. (Ex. They might say "This relationship has an age gap. That's p3dophi1ia. That's dangerous." And you might say "well you ship something with the same age gap. Is it not p3dophi1ia and dangerous when you do it?" And they will just double down and say "This ship is dangerous. The shippers are grasping at straws to make their p3d0 ship normal.")
They will agree with you, but in the worst way possible. (Ex. Someone says "Ew your ship are basically siblings because they're childhood friends and grew up together. 1nc3st apologist." And you might respond "And yet we allow our most popular ship in this fandom to be popular? They grew up together as childhood friends and were inseparable. Why is that not inc3st?" because you think they'll gain a sense of perspective here. But then that person responds "People who ship that popular ship are freaks too then." Maybe they believed that before the convo or maybe they didn't, but the point now is that (while not your intention or fault by any means) some people have gone on to harass shippers of a ship that aren't doing anything wrong. What you think will bring clarity ends up raising tensions between shippers instead)
Do not meet them where they're at on their preconceived notions. You will not make them believe that they are wrong or hypocrites. Do not concede to their heavy assertions of abuse, p3dophi1ia, 1nc3st, etc levied against the thing you like for the sake of arguing that they are a hypocrite, or with intent to make them feel dumb for inadvertently labeling 80% of a fandom with said labels. They will not "see the light". The best thing you can do, if you have to say anything, is double down with "I'm not hurting anyone and it's fiction. I can do whatever I want" or "I don't give a shit what harmless things people like as long as it's tagged and I can filter out what I dislike" (especially if this is your stance). Then block and move on.
Antis, like trolls, thrive on engagement. They want you to argue so they can continue to point at you or lie about you or make you look bad.
It is in your best interest to pick your battles, and to try to sus out the difference between a friendly argument or standing up for yourself versus feeding the trolls. You won't make the right choice every time, all of us are human after all, but I promise you that ignoring and blocking bad faith actors, deleting their hate anons, etc, is not the coward's way out. Sometimes you don't need to fight. Sometimes keeping yourself from platforming bad faith actors and giving them nothing to go on will do the job (because there are more antis that are just small blogs with little power to do anything than you think, the kinds of people whose inflammatory posts will die if no one touches them).
Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
#fandom wank#I'm not perfect either. I also fall into those same reasoning traps from time to time#that's why this is meant to be a psa or friendly reminder#I know how easy it is to get frustrated#I know how easy it is to get stuck thinking about how people are being stupid or hypocritical and feeling like there must be some way you#can get through to them#I know how tempting it is to compare other relationships or other characters or other medias people like to your own as a defense in hopes#that it will make things better for everyone (and it's tempting too to believe that people who ship the popular thing or like the popular#character have no problems and never deal with antis)#But you can't fight fire with fire or your reasoning to make people who want conflict stop pushing for conflict#These days (frustrated as I am watching entire communities of people who have committed no crimes get bullied off platforms for thoughtcrim#or for not conforming to the tastes of a pearl clutchy majority who has confused fictional tastes with real crimes and activism#) I have come to the conclusion that the best way to improve things is to just...become someone who unabashedly enjoys things. For me‚ I#think that if a community grows enough publicly‚ people won't be able to do much about it than complain in the end.#It may be scary to attach your main blog or your name to your interests your peers may bully/harass you for. But even if it means making ne#accounts/blogs/emails/etc‚ it's okay to do whatever you need to enjoy something and find your community.#You're not a coward or bad for being afraid or a lurker. You have reasonable things to fear. But if you've been craving fostering a renewed#community over a ship or character‚ then this post is your sign to take that step and become an avid poster or to publicly engage with the#few people who are posting it. Community starts with us‚ the people. And I think it's better if we decided to like the harmless things we#like publicly and enjoy the life we have than to just wait and hope things will be better and less hostile one day#Things are bleak‚ but they are not hopeless. You are not alone. You don't have to make large steps or be a major player of even be a big#contributing fandom member. You don't have to be anything. But the idea that you have to be quiet and keep silent about your fandom#interests because the antis won is just simply not true. They just want you to feel that way‚ because then they can keep their mental high#of having bullied people into obscurity#Anyways sorry about this. I'll try to go back to regular fandom posting#i just be ramblin
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i genuinely don't think a story's worldbuilding and lore has ever drawn me in the way that check please did. it's been years and i still think about it every day. the characters and plot were always superb but i think what has stuck with me the most is the depth of the settings and how everything feels so lived in and tangible. everyone wants to make a fake world and town and university but no one else has EVER done it that well
#like the college setting especially is so delicious to me#there isn't a day that goes by that i don't think about the campus map and the building names and the haus and the stop and shops#ugh i need hardcore analysis injected into my damn veins#also this could be it's own post. but#the generations of players and how every fan has different people that really speak to them#like i'm not a huge kent/tater or dex/nursey fan and honestly am pretty ambivalent to jack/bitty#(don't take this the wrong way)#but i LOVE ransom and holster and shitty and lardo#and even some of the other characters like bully and tango though i admit the later years don't hit as hard for me as the first couple#i just love that everyone finds something to go batshit over#the attention to detail was just so so incredible and still for SURE holds up#no matter what aspect#i was never super directly involved in the fandom but when i think back on formative pieces of media for me as a person and as a writer#i don't think that there are many things that compare#if you've read my writing i don't think it's hard to see the correlation at all#also if you want to talk check please analysis (or can rec me others' analysis!!!) i'd be forever grateful#otherwise i'm just going to keep marinating forever#omgcp#check please#omg check please
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Is this anything
#mmmmmmm yeah this is a main blog post#nia you’ve made this joke like 50 times already can you stop it maybe?#okay we get it the pretty noblewoman starts losing it after finding out her husband cheats on her. move on#the answer is no :) I will keep hammering in this comparison until I am physically forced to stop#and by physically I mean the fact I’m probably playing with fire by posting Summiya with half her tit out for like the third time#oh well. it’s been okay so far so let’s hope it will continue being so#aaaaanyway#I was absolutely not thinking of Hatice when I came up with Summiya and drew this piece but the vibes are there and comparison checks out#and I am absolutely not complaining because this means I get to spread some turkish soap opera fungus to my beloved partner in crime#hi Kat :)#Hatice may not be my favourite character. far from it in fact. it’s hard being a Nigar stan in this world 😔#as well as a firm believer that the show lied and that Nigar lived the rest of her life out in Sulina with her Esmanur#but tbh denying deaths happening at the end of season 3 in a mediocre early 2010s show is kinda my modus operandi at this point#who’s surprised? no one. absolutely nobody#….I got off topic again#ANYWAY don��t come @ me for Hatice’s death date I got like 3 different results when I looked it up#and went with the one that appeared in more than one source#also I’m not a historian I’m simply a lover of harem dramas and beautiful princesses with disorders#and comparing them to my vast network of avatarverse OCs#I realise this post is completely incomprehensible to everyone but Kat and me. but when has that ever stopped me before?#target audience of one and I like it that way#anyway I should probs quit my deranged ramblings and go eat something#ask me who Hatice sultan is I dare you#the legend of korra#original character#Summiya#Kat and Nia and their multiverse of madness#magnificent century#muhteşem yüzyıl#hatice sultan
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It makes me upset to see people calling AI stupid or just straight up saying "fuck AI" (even though it's in an art context) because it's like... I know and understand that the hate is directed at how it's being used currently and that people maybe just don't care like I do about this but it's upsetting because that's WORK. Not in a monetary sense at all but what everyone knows as AI didn't just sprout from the ground one day, it's decades of dedication and learning and development and collaboration to make a tool with the intention of making life better regardless of any one individual's intentions and it just makes me sad that there's so much panic around it, both from the whole "being replaced" thing that comes from waaay way back and also the very real concerns regarding generative AI. Like I can't just go up to someone and say "hey, isn't this cool?!" and expect them to understand I'm talking about AI as a tool and a product of passion and collaboration over time rather than a quick easy fix for when you want to see yourself as an anime character without having to learn to respect art first. I don't knowww it just makes me so so sad that something so beautiful is viewed in such a negative and strange light because the entire world refuses to slow down for a single second
#diary#it's also the fact that most people don't have any particular interest in cs#like nothing beyond ''we're in the future :o'' and it's not something you can force because that's how you get people being adverse#to anything ever#I feel like anything to do with technology is so sensationalized that people see it as ''something difficult'' and leave it at that#it has a lot to do with math in particular being regarded as a Superior show of intelligence even today and it has always been#sooo incredibly fucked up to me.#cause the amount of people at school that would treat me like an alien just cause I liked math / anything puzzle-y is INSANE#for example I have no fucking clue how most things work. like in general. so I really admire people who are good or invested in those thing#but I hate to think that any field or development is comparable to Magic or super estranged from myself or anything like that#because SOMEONE DID THAT. everything you know was worked for#and stopping to think about someone's work only to end up talking about it like it's magical or impossible#feels like a massive disrespect towards them. it's not impossible. someone worked hard to make it possible.#but I understand that stopping to consider these things is not something everyone can afford to do or even want to do#I'm a very slow person in general to the point I want to spend as long as possible looking at every part of anything I find interesting#but I just can't do that because there's other things I need to do. and it's the same for everyone else#tldr WHY ARE WE GOING SO FUCKING FAST !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#sorry about my ramble. you are my mutual and you love me <- indoctrination btw
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Some of those doctors make hating oat milk their entire personality. I hate them. Cannot pretend to find them funny or like i give a shit. Fucking pretentious assholes
#also my colleague (the girl i had my shift with) is the exact opposite of me in all aspects. asked me if I'd ever worked in customer service#because i couldn't care less about being fake friendly to assholes and don't care if they like the service or not#like bitch those people don't have any other choice but drink our fucking coffee it's not like I'm competing with anyone#or like they pay us in any way. i get paid for doing the dumb work i have to do not for stroking some dumb ass doctors' egos#they come out of their rooms once an hour to get coffee and we have the cups on the table and i wouldn't even Think of#HANDING them the cups and smiling sweetly at them and asking 'coffee? tea?? :))'#I'll just assume these grown adults will get their stupid coffee or tea when they want some. it's not like they don't know where it is#(and i AM friendly and smile when someone is coming in our direction but why the fuck do you need to get so disgustingly friendly with them#if someone held up a cup asking if i.want some coffee I'd leave immediately even if i came just for coffee. it's creepy)#anyway. she's nice. I'm not.#there's normal people who will get their coffee and maybe ask if the milk in the little jug is cow milk to which I'll happily reply 'yes#:)'. then there's the other people who see the oat milk and make it clear they are the most insufferable people on the planet#(and i pity their patients so much. not much to choose from i guess but if i had that as a doctor I'd happily just die)#like everyone who took oatmilk could do it without making a fuss about the cow milk on the table. the cow milk lovers could never#'the oat milk is in front of the actual milk. this is unacceptable. i hate such healthy bullshit' lol okay#'OAT milk?? I'll leave this to the horses! THANK GOD you have actual milk!'#my favorite was the one who really took personal offense with its sheer presence. as if it had killed half of his patients lmao#'we had 50 patients with xyz problem. ALL of them drink oat milk. they cannot see the connection. it's really unhealthy'#at this point i just said i didn't care and stopped paying attention and he started complaining to his doctor colleague about how#oat milk is advertised to be healthy and how it's actually the opposite and i just find that very funny compared to the first comment#from that one guy who doesn't like such healthy bullshit. you guys need to find a consensus on the oatmilk issue i think. no one takes you#seriously if you contradict yourself like this. also i couldn't care less about the healthiness of the milk alternative of my choice. bitch.#next week I'll end up killing someone. i hope they all die from their cow milk. (but not the ones who took cow milk and didn't say anything#about the oat milk. they can continue living as they didn't annoy me)#void screams#some of these doctors were actually quite nice (most of them even). one even brought an applicant to us telling her to get some coffee#(which we are not allowed to give to applicants. but i don't care. I'd rather they get something than some of the asshole jury members#who hate oat milk (which is not the issue. the issue is them making it everybody else's issue that they don't like oat milk))
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dear google what is the most professional way to request time off for intrusive ideations of not wanting to work anymore
#really dont want to EXIST anymore but yknow apparently that has more consequences#i keep being told that the way i feel isnt permanent and boy howdy do people just mean its possible for it to feel worse !#which is impressive.#i have worked to try and prove myself at this company hand over fist and it doesn't. matter. im still stuck.#and it doesn't! matter! no one cares#no one cares that i have burnt myself out trying to show them im worth their time.#and i cant just leave because i have bills and there's no comparable jobs#i thought it would be somewhere that would see me and my value and it has been the opposite of my experience multiple times over.#i feel kicked and spit on and everyone thinks i should be good with a “thank you though!” like are you kidding me?#you gave a 10k promotion to the other person which could change my life but you want me to be content with being a close second?#im doing twice the projects they're doing but im a close second ????? wgauqgwuavwhwvajwvwjwbjagwuahs#i just. i want to scream and i want to break things and i want to stop thinking about it when im off work and i cant!! i cant!!!#i have to wake up every morning and keep going and pretending like i can handle this#AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
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it's so fucked up that my happiness literally depends on me and i'm the only one who can make it better but also i won't do anything
#like yeah there are external factors like pandemic or a fucking war but somehow everyone around me figures shit out and i just don't#people my age who i went to school with have jobs and plans for the future and apartments and partners and fucking families with kids#and i know i shouldn't compare myself to them because everyone is different blah blah blah but also i can't help it#why can't i just will my brain to be normal and do something so that i can be something other than what i am now#which is just a lonely pathetic whining shell of a person or smth idk#whining for the sake of whining#and this whining never fucking stops because for some reason i seem unable to just keep it inside my head#i should invest in a diary or smth#personal
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i think people don't know how to differentiate between hard access issues and soft access issues, or don't want to. a lot of access issues aren't clearly one or the other but having no ramps is a hard access issue for obligate wheelchair users. you've gotta stop comparing every accessibility issue to ramps.
because when you compare a soft access issue (an issue which makes accessing somewhere or something painful, difficult, insulting, frustrating, etc) with a hard access issue (an issue which makes accessing somewhere or something impossible) then you inadvertently imply that the persons who experience those hard access issues don't also experience soft access issues.
like say you have a disabled student in a wheelchair. education is famously inaccessible, so everyone says "not providing this is like not providing a ramp." but it's not, firstly because they don't even provide ramps much of the time. like they straight up aren't doing that and you're acting like it's this horrible impossibility that we should understand is super bad so you can compare your own thing to it. which is just incorrect when they're not doing it.
but let's say there's a ramp. so there's a ramp but it's a 5 minute detour to get to so the wheelchair user is always late. the desks are too high to see past, the lecture hall has automated doors but no dedicated wheelchair space so they have to sit off side. can they see properly? does someone catch them up with the missed introduction? where will they take notes?
and the accessible route can be even longer than a 5 minute detour. the route might be round back, next to all the trash/rubbish. that's not dignified but it's also not sanitary either, which is dangerous to disabled people. is it round back where everyone smokes? i sure hope that wheelchair user has no respiratory issues. are they getting penalised for being late all the time? will that affect their attendance? what if they're an international student on a visa and need high attendance to stay in the country? there's a million soft access issues that are present even if the bare minimum of basic access (can i get inside) is met. but yeah there's a ramp. so whatever i guess
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