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firstofficerwiggles · 4 years ago

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Chapter 4: A Rather Indecent Proposal

Links to other chapters: Chpt. 1, Chpt. 2, Chpt. 3 Chpt. 5

Pairing: The Mandalorian x female reader

Rating: T

Warnings: Jealous!Din, a little bit of canonical violence

Word Count: ~9900 (I know it’s long, but it felt better as one chapter instead of split into two.)

Author’s note: Happy Mando Monday! I hope you enjoy this new chapter! First though, I need to apologize if the man you love or you yourself are called Eugene, but please don’t hate me for thinking it’s an unsexy name. Also, apologies to skinny men everywhere, you might not be my type, but I’m sure someone is into you.

“Do you think you could come with me for a business meeting? I could use your language skills.” Mando surprises you with his request. So far, he’s always conducted any business on his own, and except for a few weeks ago when you asked him about his bounty, he hasn’t shared any details of his work with you. But as always, you’re eager to help him if you can.

“Of course, I can. What do you need?” You’re actually kind of excited at the chance to accompany him.

“The client comes from the Unknown Regions and I hear he prefers to use Sy Bisti when possible,” Mando explains, “He’s also known to be very particular, so anything that can impress him would be helpful.”

“Absolutely, I can be your interpreter,” you agree, “When is this meeting?”

“As soon as we get to Canto Bight in a couple of hours.” He tells you. Oh, you look down at your lounging-on-the-ship comfy clothes; you’ll need to get yourself pulled together for a business meeting.

“I better go get changed into something more presentable then. Can you watch the little guy?” You ask him.

“Why? You look fine.” Mando is such a guy sometimes. You just give him an incredulous look with a small raise of your eyebrow as if to say really? “I mean, sure, I’ll watch the kid if you want to change.”

“Thanks. But, yes, I definitely need to change before we meet your client,” you reply and head down to the hull; you’re almost out of earshot when you hear him mutter to the child, “Don’t get it, she always looks fine to me.” It makes you smile to yourself that he thinks that, yet there’s a part of you that’s eager for him to see you dressed a little nicer for once.

For about the millionth time you tell yourself that you shouldn’t have a crush on Mando, but that voice is getting drowned out more and more by another one that keeps telling you to enjoy it. After your trip to Crucival, you know that he finds you attractive at least. And Maker knows you’re even more attracted to him now that you know him even better. Plus seeing him almost naked was hard to ignore! So what if he considers you just a friend, as long as you don’t let things get out of hand, or say something stupid to him, you might as well have fun with your silly little fantasies.

You rummage through your clothing and pull out a nice black dress. It’s stylish but without being too fussy and you think, it will be perfect for a meeting with a client. Besides, if you’re going to Canto Bight, you know most of the women there will be dressed to the nines so you want to make sure you’re helping Mando give off a good impression. You take the time to style your hair and put on some make-up too. You give yourself a once-over in the small mirror in the fresher and, even in the harsh industrial light, you have to say that you look pretty nice. You knew that being a nanny to a toddler was never going to be a glamorous job, but the chance to clean up like this is fun every once in a while.

“We’re landing soon, you need to come sit down!” You hear Mando calling to you, so you quickly make your way back up to the cockpit.

“Thanks,” you say as you get back to your seat, but before you sit down, you turn to Mando with a little flourish and say, “See, much more presentable for your client now.”

Din stares at you in the elegant dress; you’re literally taking his breath away and he can’t even speak for a few seconds. Finally all he can think to say is, “You look good.” And he immediately chides himself for not being able to come up with a better compliment. Thankfully, you seem pleased with his pathetic words and just give him a happy smile before buckling yourself in. He’s still staring at you, taking in the pretty hairstyle you’ve created and looking at whatever it is that you’ve done to make your lips seem redder and fuller. It isn’t until a sensor on the control panel starts beeping loudly that Din snaps back to reality and focuses on landing the Crest.

“Wait, what about the child, do we bring him with us?” In your excitement, you’ve forgotten your primary job, as you’re getting ready to head out into the hustle and bustle of this flashy city. You look at the little one’s big eyes and like his father, he also seems to be fascinated with your done-up appearance.

“Sure, I have a satchel he can ride along in. And he’s plenty old enough to get into the casino; the age to get in is 18.” Mando chuckles as he maneuvers his 50-year-old toddler into a small brown shoulder bag. Mando’s cape partially obscures the little one making him less noticeable. You suppose he’ll be all right, it’s only a meeting in the restaurant of a casino; it’s not as if you’re taking the little one to the gaming tables. Although if you’re honest, you wouldn’t be surprised if Mando said that was perfectly ok too, so long as he’s safe. You give his tiny hand a squeeze and he coos back at you seemingly eager for your little adventure.

You follow Mando off the ship and through the throngs of men in sharply tailored evening jackets and women beautifully attired in chic gowns. Everyone looks very cosmopolitan especially against the stunning background of the decadent casino. You have to admit that you were expecting something a little more garish based on the descriptions you’ve heard of Canto Bight, but this particular establishment is quite nice with marble floors, crystal chandeliers, and unique modern art pieces strategically placed throughout the large lobby. With Mando in his beautiful beskar armor and you in your fashionable dress, you make a dashing pair as you pass by the colorful lights of the gaming machines.

Din leads you to a restaurant entrance and tells the maître d’ that he is here to meet a Mr. Omseki. The man seems slightly taken aback by the presence of a Mandalorian but when his gaze lands on you, his face softens and in a crisp accent he says, “Right this way, Madam” and then he barely glances at Din, as he says, “Sir”. It’s not surprising that the man would rather keep his eyes on you with your eyes shining in delight as you take in the scene around you. Din’s never cared much for Canto Bight and its rather pompous atmosphere, but he’s finding some charm in this place as he watches your reaction to it all. Not to mention, Din knows he would have received a much frostier welcome here without you by his side and he’s very glad you came with him. As you reach the client’s table, this feeling is renewed, as Mr. Omseki is all smiles as you greet him in the unusual language. Despite not understanding the words, Din can tell by the man’s animated speech, that he is positively delighted at the prospect of meeting with a beautiful woman and not just a Mandalorian bounty hunter. The man also seems happy to see the child and he gives him the flower from his lapel to play with as a small gift. Din listens as you interpret the client’s words and you all begin to exchange some welcoming small talk. Greef Karga had been the one to pass on this client to Din as a lucrative off-the-books bounty, but the man he described was temperamental and moody. Mr. Omseki is anything but moody tonight and if Din didn’t know better, he’d swear the man was flirting with you. He doesn’t love that idea, but if it helps this meeting go smoothly, it will be worth it.

Mr. Omseki is a charmer and he is thrilled to be speaking to you; he’s told you several times how pleasant it is to talk business in an ‘appropriate’ language and how overjoyed he is to speak to you. You suppose it must have been a while since he’s had the opportunity to speak Sy Bisti and perhaps that’s why he’s enjoying himself so much now. You’ve felt a little abashed at times, as you’ve interpreted his rather flowery praise of you to Mando although at least some of it has also extended to him. However, this client seems more interested in just chatting with you than he is in talking business with Mando. You try to steer the conversation back to Mando’s work, but each time you do, Mr. Omseki manages to ask you another question about yourself. Mando must sense your worry that you aren’t doing a good enough job and he drops his hand down to cover yours where it is sitting on the table. He gives you a reassuring squeeze and you continue making polite conversation with the client. You figure this must be part of his business negotiations.

Din leaves his hand covering yours in a clear message to the client that you belong with him. It’s a subtle gesture, but one that Mr. Omseki is shrewd enough to understand as shortly afterwards he shifts the conversation to the bounty that he wants Din to capture. He listens carefully as you interpret the details and he begins to formulate a plan for the hunt. Din almost has all the pertinent information, when a sudden commotion interrupts the conversation. He immediately pulls his blaster and shields you behind him. A man in a disheveled suit is pushing past the maître d’ and several waiters as he stumbles towards your table. Din realizes disappointedly that this man looks exactly like the quarry that was just described by Mr. Omseki.

“Mr. O-Omseki, I have it, I have all your m-money and the in-interest,” the man stutters out as he begins pulling out bags of credits from his coat.

“Well, well, Mr. Sanditore, looks like this is your lucky day,” Mr. Omseki drawls out, “I was just about to send this Mandalorian off to kill you.”

“Th- thank you Mr. Omseki, thank you, I promise you won’t have any trouble from me again.” The disheveled man is practically shaking with gratitude.

“Well, I am sorry Mr. Mandalorian, it was delightful to meet you and your most lovely interpreter, but I am afraid I no longer have need of your services.” Mr. Omseki says to Din. Then he turns to you and speaks in Sy Bisti in a soft voice. Din obviously can’t know what he’s saying but the mild look of surprise on your face is enough to raise his concern. Whatever it is though, you handle it gracefully and end the conversation with a pleasant tone before shifting back to Basic to say good-bye. As you exit the table, you reach for Din’s arm, threading your hand around his elbow. He is surprised by your touch but says nothing as you walk towards the large bar near the center of the restaurant.

“What did he say to you?” Din wants to know.

“He asked me if we were romantically involved, because if we weren’t he wanted to know if I was free for the rest of the evening.” You reply looking a little embarrassed.

“What did you tell him?” He really wants to hear this answer.

“I lied and said that we were. It seemed like the best solution.” You’re slightly looking away from him as you say this as if you’re worried about making eye contact.

“Good.” Din’s pleased you lied, and it’s petty, but he likes the idea of that rich man thinking that Din has something that he wants and can’t have.

“I’m sorry about the job though,” you’re saying to him now, “I know you must be disappointed.”

“It’s alright,” Din sighs a little though, “these things happen.” He sees you look around the bar area with a wistful look and realizes that you’re not ready to leave. “Besides, now we have time to stay and have a drink, just the two of us, well, us and our little sleeping bundle here.” The baby has curled up and is napping in his little satchel.

“Really?” You look so pleased that it makes Din smile to himself. You settle into one of the stools at the bar and Din motions to the bartender to order your drinks. He orders one for himself too, asking for a straw in his.

“Wait, so you do use straws?” You ask with a small laugh.

“Sure, it’s the easiest way to drink in public.” He shrugs matter-of-factly, but that just seems to make you giggle more. “What’s so funny?”

“I don’t know,” you say between giggles, “but there’s something so cute about you using a straw.”

“Cute?” He says, sounding slightly insulted.

“Oh stop, I mean it in a good way,” you say and light push his shoulder in a playful fashion, “It’s probably just because I’ve never seen you use a straw before.”

“So when you see me do something new, it’s cute to you?” Din is playing up his affront to the word cute because he’s enjoying teasing you.

“No, not everything new.” You roll your eyes at him. “It’s just when you do something ordinary, I guess, because I tend to think of you as extraordinary.” You let your lashes flutter a little as you say that last word, flirting with him.

“Extraordinary, huh?” He cocks his helmet to the side as he looks at you, “I like that better than cute.”

“Whatever, you’re still cute too.” You give him a wink and then turn to the bartender who has your drinks. Both glasses have a straw and you make quite a show of using yours, so much so that Din can’t help but let out a laugh. You’re both enjoying the moment so much that neither of you notice a thin, lanky man approach you.

“Ex-excuse me?” The man is trying to get your attention. Mando shifts back into alert mode almost instantly as he says, “Yes?”

The man is about as tall as Mando with very fair hair and pale skin. He looks to be in his mid-thirties and seems a little out of place here in a casino. Although, like the other men here, he’s wearing an expensive suit, but everything about him looks slightly uncomfortable and it’s as if he doesn’t quite know what to do with his body, like the way he holds his shoulders and moves his hands looks anxious.

“I’d like to hire you for an evening,” the man says, but weirdly he looks at you instead of Mando, but you figure that’s because he’s probably too intimidated to look directly at the Mandalorian.

“What sort of work do you need?” Mando asks in an even tone.

“Oh?” The man turns and looks at Mando directly, “I- I didn’t mean you. I want to hire her for an evening.”

Mando’s reaction to this statement is so swift you almost miss it. He instantly pulls his fist back and punches the man square in the face, knocking him to the floor. Mando looks down at him and grits out in an angry voice, “She’s not for sale.”

Well, this is a first. You thought you looked pretty nice tonight, but apparently, you look like a prostitute.

“Wait, wait, I’m s-sorry, I didn’t mean it like that.” The man cowers on the ground but tries to explain himself, “I didn’t mean to insult her, or you.”

“So what did you mean?” Your curiosity has gotten the best of you.

“I just need a beautiful woman to pretend to be my girlfriend for an evening, that’s all.” He says.

“Exactly how is that different?” Mando is still towering over the man in a very threatening manner.

“Just to attend a party with me, and help me look good,” the man says quickly, “I promise nothing s-sex related at all.” He holds his hands up in a defensive posture. He looks back to you with pleading eyes, “I can pay you really well, and all you need to do is go to a party and wear a pretty dress.”

You admit you’re intrigued by the idea and you know that with Mando losing out on this latest bounty, any extra funds would be helpful. You put your hand on Mando’s bicep in what you hope is a calming motion as you say, “It can’t hurt to hear him out, Mando.”

“Are you serious?” Mando asks you in a low voice.

You shrug, “If we don’t like what he has to say, you can punch him again.” The man on the floor lets out a little whimper at that, but Mando gives you a small nod and backs away from the man.

Tentatively, the man picks himself up off the floor and extends a hand out to you, “I’m Eugene DeWitt, I own a company that creates high-end gaming machines and I develop algorithms for those machines.”

You shake his hand briefly, and give him your first name. “So, Mr. DeWitt, why do you need a pretend girlfriend to go to a party?”

“Please, call me Eugene. It’s the annual celebration for the casino owners and it’s my best chance to network with them. I’ve been to the party the last three years, but I haven’t been able to barely get a word with any of the important owners.” He explains.

“What makes you think I’d be able to change that?” You’re not sure what effect your presence would have on his ability to do business.

“I need to find a way to catch their interest and impress them, and I think a woman like you would be the best way to do that.” He tells you.

“I’m flattered, but I think you might be overestimating my appeal,” you reply, “besides, why don’t you just ask out a woman you want to date?”

“I’ve tried,” Eugene admits, “but honestly, even if they’d said yes, I know they wouldn’t have the same effect as you; you’re drop dead gorgeous.”

“He’s right,” Mando says softly, almost under his breath. Your head snaps to the side to look at him after that comment. You don’t have any time to process it however because Eugene is still speaking.

“I’ll pay you 20,000 credits just to go to the party with me and pretend to be my girlfriend.” He offers.

What?!? Is he serious? Suddenly this job has real potential. But you’re still skeptical that he wants you to just attend the party, it feels like that amount of money would come with additional stipulations.

“Let me get this straight, you want me to just go to the party with you and pretend to be your girlfriend, but you’re not expecting sex or any other sexual favors?” You state this outright because you need everything to be clear.

“Yes,” he confirms, “I would need you to be affectionate towards me, but only in an appropriate way in public.”

“Define what you mean by affectionate.” You want to make sure you know precisely what he wants.

“Hold my hand or arm, let me put my arm around you, dance with me, maybe let me give you a small kiss?” He suggests.

“No kissing.” Mando interjects all of a sudden.

“O-Ok, no kissing,” Eugene agrees, “But would you be alright with the rest of that?”

“Yes, I can do that.” His terms seem reasonable and honestly, that much money to just attend a party? You’ve had way worse jobs.

“I’m going too,” Mando states and from his tone of voice this is not up for debate, “I’ll be your bodyguard for the evening.”

“That’s a good idea,” Eugene is intrigued by the prospect; “A Mandalorian bodyguard would also be impressive.”

“Good, then you can pay us 40,000 credits for the evening,” you counter-offer. You know it’s ballsy to ask, but truthfully Mando’s skills are worth a lot and he should be paid as well.

“That was uh more than I was hoping to spend,” Eugene says.

“Maybe so, but now you’re getting both of us to help you impress these future clients,” you smile flirtatiously and look him right in the eye holding his gaze.

“I can do 35,000,” Eugene offers.

“Alright, 35,000 and you buy me a new dress and shoes for this party.” That last part is really only because you don’t own any other dresses that would be suitable for his event, but also part of you wants to see if you can get him to give in to you.

“Can the dress be red?” Eugene asks.

“Sure, I’ll get a red dress, if that’s what you’d like,” You’re totally fine with that.

“We have a deal.” He says.

“One more thing,” Mando speaks up again, “Pay her half the credits now.”

“How do I know you won’t just take my money and leave?” Eugene asks.

“You have my word as a Mandalorian.” His tone is serious and just intimidating enough that Eugene capitulates. He takes out a holopad and asks for your information and just like that, 17,500 credits are in your account. It’s more money than you’ve ever had.

You finalize all the arrangements for tomorrow, with Eugene offering to have his mother watch the child for the evening. Mando is a bit reluctant at first to have someone else watch the kid but he realizes it will be hard to pull off looking like a bodyguard with a baby in tow. Likewise, you can hardly play the role of trophy girlfriend if you have the little guy. You wait until Eugene takes his leave of you for the night before you turn to Mando to exclaim over this crazy turn of events.

“Oh my, Mando, can you believe it? 17,500 credits for each of us, just for one night of going to a party?” You can’t help the excitement in your voice.

“Hmm, yes, it’s a lot,” he says, with a lot less enthusiasm, “but it’s all your money.”

“What?” He catches you by surprise, “No, Mando, I’m going to split it with you.”

“He only wanted to hire you,” he states firmly.

“Yes, but I was never going to do this without you. I was going to suggest you come too but you beat me to it.” You explain to him.

“Were you really?” He sounds a little skeptical, but there’s a small note of hope in his voice too.

“Absolutely. I’m not so naïve that I would agree to go to a party with a total stranger without you there to protect me.” It feels so natural to you now that of course he would be there to watch over you. “Besides, I know that you being there will keep Eugene from getting too handsy.”

Mando makes a little snorting sound, “Yeah, I could do without the affectionate part.”

“Don’t worry, I can do just enough to make it look believable without letting it get out of hand.” You link your arm through his and lean a little onto his shoulder, “C’mon, Mando, be a little happy about the money with me.”

He reaches up and pats your hand where it holds onto him. “Alright, since it means that much to you, I’m happy.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next day you are in a swanky boutique recommended by Eugene where you are on a mission to find a red evening gown for tonight. You tried to tell Mando that his presence was not necessary for this, but he insisted on coming along with the child in tow. It’s been an adventure already because as you were looking over possible dress choices with the saleswoman, the mischievous toddler managed to climb out of his satchel and onto a table in the lingerie section. When you caught him, he was playing in a pile of lace thongs with one pair dangling off his ear. Even more amusing was Mando who was trying to extract the kiddo from his panty pile while trying hard not to touch any of the thongs. Thankfully, the saleswoman thought it was all utterly charming and laughed right along with you. Now Mando and the little guy are sitting together looking only slightly out of place on an elegant velvet sofa while they wait for you to try on dresses.

It’s been so long since you’ve shopped for anything this fancy, you were feeling a little intimidated at first. Yet the more you viewed the beautiful gowns, the more excited you became at the prospect of wearing one for the evening. The selection in this shop is lovely and since you know Eugene is paying, for once you’re not worried about the price. You slip on the first dress and can’t help but smile at your stylish reflection. This first one is a slinky satin gown that hugs your curves. You step out into the main area of the dressing rooms where Mando is waiting and where there is also a large three-sided mirror.

“Oh that looks very nice on you,” the saleswoman says.

You turn to look at yourself in the multiple angles offered from the mirror, “I’m not sure, what do you think, Mando?”

“It’s fine,” he says flatly. Well, with that lack of enthusiasm, you know this dress is out.

The next dress is more of a ball gown style and it’s kind of a lot with a beaded bodice and a full tulle skirt. Still you figure you should see it in the better mirror for the full effect.

“Oh no, I look like a red powder puff!” You say in dismay.

“I like it better,” Mando says, and then under his breath you just barely hear him say, “You’re more covered up.”

“I can’t wear this and be taken seriously.” It’s on to dress number three.

As you adjust the straps for the third dress, you find your face heating up at your reflection. This dress screams trophy girlfriend as it is super sexy. The deep sweetheart neckline shows off a lot of cleavage and there are thigh-high slits on both sides of the skirt.

You’re barely out of the dressing room when you hear, “Absolutely not.”

You can see Mando’s visor trained on you and it feels like that black T is boring a hole into your body.

“I don’t know, I think I look really good in this one.” Wow, when you turn around you can see that this dress is practically backless.

“You look fabulous! Very hot!” the saleswoman coos at you.

“Go change.” Mando’s voice sounds deeper somehow and he’s using his this-is-not-a-request voice. A little naughty part of you wants to argue back with his demand, but you did tell him that you didn’t want Eugene to get too liberal with his definition of affection, so you figure Mando’s probably right.

When you head back to the dressing room, you’re down to just one more dress and as you slip it over your head, you know that this is the one. It’s made of a soft, floaty chiffon with a bodice that accentuates your bust and your waistline. The skirt flows down your hips and legs gracefully and while there’s a slit in this dress too, it’s more hidden and only offers a glimpse of leg as you move. When you step out of the dressing room this time all you hear is a soft murmur of approval from the saleswoman.

You smile at your reflection as you twirl a little in the mirror and imagine how nice you will look with your hair styled and with your evening makeup.

“This has to be the one,” the saleswoman is saying to you now, “Doesn’t she look enchanting?” and she turns to Mando for his approval.

Mando nods his helmet slightly, but remains quiet. You didn’t really expect him to say much, but you were hoping for a bit more than that. At least he isn’t disapproving of this gown though.

“I have the perfect shoes to go with this dress. I’ll be right back!” The saleswoman tells you.

Din waits until she is out of earshot and then says softly, “You look beautiful.” He watches as your face lights up with his compliment and you thank him, reaching out to grasp his arm briefly as you do. That seems to be a thing you do now when you’re particularly pleased with something he’s done. You turn back to the mirror to inspect the dress more and he lets his gaze roam over you.

The truth is Din thought you looked beautiful in all of the dresses, even in the silly puffy one. He didn’t want to encourage you too much with the first dress because although you looked great it in, the style was fairly revealing and he disliked the idea of Eugene seeing you in it. But then, that third dress, Maker, he almost had a heart attack when he saw you in that. It was so sexy he wanted to rip it off you right there in the middle of the store. There was no way in hell any other man was going to see you in that. This dress you’re wearing now is more sophisticated and gives off more of a sensual elegance than outright sexiness. He still hates the idea of Eugene seeing you in it and what’s more thinking that you chose the dress special for him. This whole job is stupid, but he can’t deny the money is too good to pass up. Still he doesn’t trust Eugene to have such pure intentions as he claims and he knows he won’t let the man have a single moment alone with you if he can help it.

You’ve finished choosing the shoes and now you’re heading back into the dressing room to put on your regular clothes. Din breathes a sigh of relief at seeing your normal self again and he feels himself relax a bit. He follows the saleswoman to the register station and watches as she carefully places the gown in a garment bag. You’re about to give the woman Eugene’s account information, when Din hands over his own credit chip to pay for the dress and shoes.

“Mando, what are you doing? Eugene is going to cover the cost of this.” You voice conveys your confusion at his actions.

“I’m not letting another man buy you a dress,” Din mutters.

“Why not? It’s only to wear for this party tonight.” You’re looking at him completely perplexed.

“Because I want to buy it for you,” he says more firmly this time. Din sees a flash of something in your eyes that he likes; it’s a mixture of respect and awe, and perhaps a touch of desire too if he’s not being too hopeful.

“Well, if you’re certain,” you reply softly still looking at him in that new way.

“I am.” Din takes the garment bag from the saleswoman and motions for her to charge everything to his chip. “You’re sure you didn’t want the big puffy dress, though?” And even though you can’t see the smirk on his face, he’s fairly confident you can hear it in his tone.

“Thank you, Mando, but I think this is the best choice.” You let out a light laugh and give him that beaming smile again that he loves to see. You follow him out of the store and then grasp his arm again as you say, “I really do love that dress, thank you for buying it for me.”

“You’re welcome,” Din tells you, wishing that it would just be the two of you going out tonight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“You’re sure you want to do this? We could still turn around and leave.” This is the second time Mando has asked you that. The first was when you came out of the fresher after finishing your make-up and he saw your completed look for the evening. He didn’t compliment you again, but the long pause he took to look at you and the way he tilted his helmet to the side made your insides flutter nonetheless. Now you’re standing outside Eugene’s door and it seems he’s still having second thoughts.

“It will be fine, Mando. Just remember that this money means you can take a break from hunting and spend some extra time on finding the Jedi for the little guy here.” He sighs in response and knocks on the door.

You shift the toddler in your arms and you look down at him. He’s been having fun playing with the soft material of your dress and he’s got a big handful of your skirt in his little claws right now. The only worry you have is about leaving him with a stranger tonight. Eugene’s mother will probably be fine, but you’ve grown so attached to the child you’re feeling more anxious about being away from him that you anticipated.

“You’ll be a good boy tonight, won’t you, buddy?” You say to the child as you carefully extricate your dress from his little hand. “Mando and I will miss you but we won’t be too late.”

The door opens to reveal Eugene in a tuxedo with a red flower on his lapel and next to him, a cheerful looking older woman.

“Good evening, you look spectacular,” Eugene greets you enthusiastically.

“Thank you, you look dashing yourself,” you respond with a slight flirtiness to your tone. You figure you might as well get used to your role now.

“Oooh! Is this the sweet little baby I get to watch tonight?” The woman seems kind and the child coos at her with interest.

“Yes, thank you for doing this,” you respond pleasantly. You give the little guy a hug and a kiss on his forehead before handling him over to her.

“What a little charmer! You don’t have to worry about a thing, my dear. I’ll take good care of your baby and you take good care of mine.” She says with a wink towards Eugene.

“Th- thank you, mother.” Eugene sounds embarrassed and you try your best not to snicker. “We should get going.” He extends his arm to you and you lightly thread your hand around his elbow.

This whole time Mando hasn’t made a sound and is standing so still you’d almost think he was a suit of armor on display. But when you take Eugene’s arm, Mando lets out a little grunt that sounds like disapproval. You turn to look at him and mouth, “It will be OK” and give him as encouraging a smile as you can. The nod of his helmet to you is slight, but you know he understood.

Eugene leads you out onto the city walkway with Mando following close behind. The party is being held in the largest casino and it’s a short walk from Eugene’s home. Once again, the streets are filled with fashionable people ready for a night on the town. You feel the soft swish of your skirt against your legs and smile again at how nice it feels to be dressed up like this. You make small talk with Eugene, getting comfortable with him so you can make this look like a real date. You resist the urge to turn back and look at Mando though because you know if you do, your feigned interest in Eugene will falter.

By the time you reach your destination, you’ve managed to perfect a nice light laugh at Eugene’s jokes and you feel comfortable enough to lean into him in an affectionate way. As you enter the opulent ballroom of the casino, you paste a brilliant smile onto your face as if you’re simply delighted to be there. Eugene has told you he wants you to help draw the attention of various men in attendance so you figure you’ll sort of openly flirt with the room and see who notices. You catch the eye of a well-dressed older gentleman, and your technique works wonderfully as he comes right over.

“Good evening, I’m Mr. Belvers, the owner of this casino; it’s so very nice to have you here, my dear.” He greets you with a small bow and flourish of his hand.

“Why, thank you!” You respond warmly, “It was so nice of my boyfriend to bring me here tonight. You must know him, Mr. Eugene DeWitt of Advanced Gaming Enterprises?” You introduce Eugene with a smile.

“Oh yes, of course, Mr. DeWitt, how nice to see you again.” With the introductions made, Eugene launches into conversation with Mr. Belvers. You listen as best you can to the business talk and smile and nod like the perfect trophy girlfriend. It’s boring, but really easy when you realize that not much more is expected of you. Finally, with a promise to dance with Mr. Belvers later, the conversation ends and you breathe a small sigh of relief that if anything at least you got Eugene a few minutes with the owner of this place.

“That was incredible!” Eugene is saying excitedly, “I’ve never even met the man before but he acted like we were old friends. You are fantastic!” He gives your hand a squeeze and pulls you a little closer to him. He steers you deeper into the ballroom, eager to make another contact. You turn your head to look at Mando and give him a smile and a subtle nod, which he returns.

The pattern continues throughout the party, you spy an older man, make eyes at him, and reel him in for Eugene. When you’re between conversations, Mando has taken to checking in with you to make sure everything is going well. All in all, it’s about what you expected and you have to admit that Eugene was right; apparently, these men are all easily swayed by the look of a pretty face. You’re please to see that Mando’s presence is having a good effect too. These bigshots are very impressed that Eugene has a Mandalorian for his private security. Several of them have even asked Mando if he’s available for future security jobs too. Who knows, maybe Mando will come away with some business contacts of his own at the end of tonight.

As the evening continues, Eugene seems to be growing more confident, and you’ve noticed he’s taken to placing his arm around your waist. It doesn’t bother you, but occasionally his hand does seem to be a touch low. He also leaned in just a moment ago and let his lips brush your cheek. It wasn’t really much, but still you’re surprised he dared to try it.

“I said no kissing.” Mando’s voice is hard and direct, causing Eugene to flinch and instantly put more space between the two of you. “Keep your hands above her waist too.” Your heartbeat stutters at Mando’s protectiveness and you look at him with a grateful smile. When you’re sure no one else is looking, you give him the flirtatious look you’ve been using all evening and then top it off with a wink. You notice that he clenches his fists as you do this and then gives you a deeper nod in response.

I hate this, I hate this, I hate this. Din’s mantra for tonight is not a pleasant one. He’d much rather be hunting down a bounty right now than having to watch you flirt and simper to every man in the room. He’d rather be slogging through a swamp or crossing a frozen tundra to catch a quarry than have to watch yet another man ogling you or touching you. And then, there’s Eugene; Din would like to punch him in the face again. The man keeps getting bolder as the night progresses. Din’s caught him staring at your breasts and your ass several times, and he’s clearly getting too handsy. The only thing making this night remotely bearable is the way you keep looking over to him with such sweet glances, as if you’re sharing a secret with him. Although the way you looked at him just now made him want to sweep you up in his arms and haul you out of here as fast as he could. If you do that again, he doesn’t know if he can be responsible for his actions.

Din groans to himself, and prepares for this night to get worse because Eugene is leading you out onto the dance floor. There’s no way for him to follow close to you while you’re dancing and he’s willing to bet that Eugene takes advantage of that opportunity. In an attempt to stay in Eugene’s eye line as much as possible, Din stalks around the dance floor following your swaying movements. He can’t help but watch the graceful way you move as you dance, noticing the soft arch of your back and the delicate glide of your feet across the floor. As he sees Eugene’s arms pull you in closer, Din feels a deep burning anger in his stomach and once again thinks about breaking Eugene’s nose with his fist. This is the worst job ever.

Dancing with Eugene isn’t so bad you decide. It’s a nice break from all the forced flirting and extremely dull conversations you’ve had to put up with all evening. And despite the fact that you’d much rather be dancing with someone else, it’s still a pleasant activity. Moreover, after Mando’s warning, Eugene is back to being a gentleman and keeping his hands in polite territory. He does seem to be enjoying the dancing himself, quite a lot by the expression on his face, although every once in a while his confidence seems to fade for a moment.

“May I ask you a personal question?” Eugene looks at you quizzically.

“Alright,” you agree, curious.

“Are you and the Mandalorian involved? Romantically, I mean?” He looks nervous as he asks this.

“Do you think I would have agreed to this date if we were?” You deflect his question somewhat because you find that you don’t really want to admit that there’s nothing between you and Mando. Especially because it feels like you’ve been growing closer. You think about when he insisted on buying you the dress earlier today, and how special that felt, definitely not something a friend would do. Even tonight, there is this energy between you and Mando that you can’t deny, nevermind that you’re technically on a date with Eugene.

“He seems extremely protective of you.” Eugene replies.

You shrug lightly, “He is.”

“You know, if you wanted something else, a different life, I could make that happen for you,” Eugene looks at your earnestly, “After tonight, I’m going to be an even wealthier man. I would treat you like a princess.”

“Eugene,” you sigh, “I appreciate the offer, but-”

“Don’t answer yet,” he insists, “Think about it. Please.” He pulls you in closer to him so that you’re dancing cheek to cheek. You know he means it to be romantic but you feel nothing. There’s nothing to think about.

When the music ends, you feel relieved that you can put some space between the two of you. You’re turning to look for Mando when unexpectedly you hear a loud crash followed by blaster fire. As if he materialized out of nowhere, Mando is at your side pulling you to the floor and covering you with his body.

“I’ve got you,” Mando says, holding you close with one arm as the other holds his blaster. Your heart is racing and you hear the commotion of many people shouting, rushing feet, and general mayhem. You pull yourself tighter under Mando, squeeze your eyes shut, and try to keep as still as you can. Suddenly, Mando lifts off you slightly and fires three shots in rapid succession.

“It’s alright,” He tells you, “I took care of them. Everything is alright.”

“You’re sure?” Your voice comes out shaky and high-pitched.

“Hey, look at me, come on, look at me” Mando’s voice is soft and comforting, and you tip your head up and open your eyes to look at his visor. “You’re safe, no one will hurt you.”

“Thank you, Mando,” you breathe, feeling relief flood your body. Even though you can’t see his eyes, you know he’s looking back at you and it’s soothing.

“You have to let go of me now, cyar’ika, so I can help you up off this floor.” His voice is still soft and you can hear a lightness to it now. You hadn’t realized but you have a death grip on the material of his thick protective shirt on the side of his body. Chuckling weakly at yourself, you release him and he climbs off you before reaching down to pull you back to your feet.

“That was incredible shooting, Mando!” Eugene can’t hide how impressed and excited he.

“I’ll say it was!” the casino owner from before, Mr. Belvers, is coming over to offer his praise to Mando too. He gives Mando’s hand a hearty shake and then raises his voice to address the party, “Folks! Everything looks to be all safe now, thanks to this heroic Mandalorian!”

The partygoers erupt in applause and for the next several minutes, people are coming up to thank Mando personally. You’re glad to see Mando get appreciation he deserves for saving everyone, but from his body language, you think he seems a bit embarrassed by all the attention.

“Who were they?” You turn and ask Mr. Belvers.

“Some thugs who have been plaguing the casinos for weeks now. I think they came here tonight trying to rob people of their valuables. By the way, there is a reward for their capture and I’ll see to it that those credits are yours, sir.” He says this last part directly to Mando.

Din thanks the man and gives him a small card with his guild information, explaining how best to pay him. Now that the danger in the room has cleared, quite literally by casino workers who’ve come to take away the bodies of the dead men, people are starting to go back to the party. These people are so wealthy and spoiled that these violent men and the Mandalorian who dispatched them are already just an amusing anecdote to be shared over cocktails. He is so ready to leave this place. Din looks over to you and sees that while you’re calmer now, you are still visibly shaken from the intrusion of the would-be robbers. He wonders sheepishly if maybe he scared you a little too by yanking you to the ground so quickly, but it was pure instinct to protect you. Nitwit Eugene is rambling on about what an exciting evening it’s been to whoever will listen, completely oblivious to your discomfort. Din decides Eugene’s gotten more than his money’s worth and he’s taking you home right now.

“It’s time for us to leave.” Din’s voice is stern as he steps closer to you and Eugene, not caring that he’s interrupting the man.

“So soon, the party is still going-” Eugene tries to protest, but when he sees Din’s rigid posture, he trails off.

“I am rather tired, Eugene,” you say, and then lower your voice “Besides, it will be better to leave them wanting more.” Din watches as you bat your eyelashes at the man and give him a soft smile, and then like magic, Eugene is agreeing to leave. Din does have to admire your skill at using your feminine wiles to get men to do your bidding. He also knows that if you ever choose to try that with him, he’ll be putty in your hands. He smiles at the thought, but it’s short-lived as soon as he sees Eugene slide his arm around your waist again as he steers you towards the exit. Din tromps after the two of you, at least this stupid job is almost over.

You’re close to Eugene’s place and you’re feeling quite glad that this fake date is almost over. You just want to get the child and hurry back to the Crest so Mando can fly you away from here. Eugene is wittering on telling you how great you were and what a wonderful pair you make, but you’re only barely listening to him. Blessedly when you get to Eugene’s door, Mando is all business.

“It’s time to make the final transfer of credits,” Mando tells Eugene.

“Of course,” Eugene replies, taking out his holopad and completing the necessary functions. “Thank you again, you were both very impressive.”

Eugene opens the door and you and Mando wait for a few minutes until he returns with the little one who is sound asleep. He hands the child to Mando and then turns to you, “I’d like a moment alone to speak to you before we say goodnight.”

“Eugene, I think I did everything you wanted tonight, but our fake date is over.” You say pointedly.

“Please, it will only take a moment.” He looks at Mando, “Please.”

“Fine,” you say and give Mando a small nod. He doesn’t exactly give you any privacy, but Mando does take a few steps away and turns his body slightly so he’s no longer facing you head on.

Eugene takes your hand in his and says in a soft voice, “Please, tell me that you’ve thought about my offer?”

“There’s nothing for me to think about; I belong with them,” you tell him as you pull your hand from his grasp and gesture towards Mando and the child.

“But there’s so much more I can do for you, I can give you more than he can. I can give you a safe home, beautiful clothes and jewelry, you’ll never want for anything.” Eugene must think you’re completely shallow and nothing but a gold digger. “And, I would worship you.” He’s really piling it on thick now.

“Eugene, you don’t even know me, and if you did, you would know that I’m not interested in that life,” you state firmly, “I think it’s time to say goodbye. I wish you all the best with your business.” You turn to go but Eugene reaches out for your arm. Fortunately Mando is already back at your side and he brushes Eugene’s arm away roughly as he says,

“She said no.” Din turns to escort you away, placing his arm around your waist, mimicking Eugene’s earlier touch. It means he’s holding you much closer to his body than he has before when he usually just places a palm on the small of your back. He feels you relax into his touch and for the first time this evening, he feels a sense of rightness. Still though, Eugene’s words I can give you more than he can are ringing in his ears and his self-doubt makes him sigh.

He waits until you are far enough away so that Eugene cannot hear him and in a small voice, Din forces himself to ask you, “You’re certain you don’t want to stay? He did make you a good offer.”

“What? No, I absolutely don’t want to stay with Eugene.” Your answer is swift and a bit shocked.

“I would understand if you did.” Din says, his voice still soft and trying to hide his emotion.

“Mando, do you want me to stay?” You stop and turn to face him so you can look directly at his visor, your face openly displaying your displeasure at his words.

“No,” he says strongly, “I don’t. Not at all. But it would be wrong of me to hold you back if you wanted to leave.”

You slip your hand into his and look at him with soft eyes as you say, “Mando, I don’t want to leave you, or the child. I’m happy with you both, happier than I’ve been in a long time. Eugene is wrong; he doesn’t know what you can give me.”

Din’s heart pounds at your words, as he says, “I’m glad,” he pauses just for a second before he tells you, “I don’t want you to leave us.” He gives your hand a small squeeze and turns to continue walking.

“Besides, there’s no way I could stay with a man I’m not attracted to in the slightest.” Your voice has a lighter tone to it and it breaks a bit of the tension.

“He wasn’t that ugly,” Din shrugs and you laugh in response.

“No, it wasn’t really about his looks, just the overall way he carried himself. I prefer a man with more confidence.” You say.

“Confidence is attractive.” Din agrees with you.

“Yeah, it is. I like a man who can walk into a room and earn everyone’s respect just by the way he holds himself. That’s incredibly attractive.” You give him a slight side-glance as you say this. “But if we’re being shallow, then I also wasn’t physically attracted to Eugene either.”

“Why not?” Din’s curiosity is peaked.

“He was much too skinny.” You wrinkle your nose a bit as you say this.

“You like chubby men?” Din chuckles, and while he’s not chubby, he thinks of his own stomach which isn’t quite as flat as it used to be when he was younger.

“I like bigger men,” you clarify, “Men who are broader, more muscular. Although chubby is cute too. When I cuddle with a guy, I want something to cuddle in to.”

“Is that so?” It’s not lost on Din that what you’ve just described is essentially him and he can’t deny how much he likes hearing that. Plus, now he’s imagining what it would be like to cuddle with you. He doesn’t have time to dwell on that thought however, because you’re giggling at something.

“Well and then there was the worst part, his name,” you say rather playfully.

“What was wrong with his name?” Din’s never thought about a name being part of someone’s attractiveness.

“Honestly, I don’t think I could seriously moan out Eugene in a moment of passion.” You’re consumed by giggles at the idea.

Din is stunned by what you’ve just said and all he can think about is what your voice might sound like if you were to moan out his name, his real name. Fortunately, he doesn’t seem to need to respond to you as you’re still wracked with laughter.

“Oh no!” You stop laughing and gasp, “I didn’t think.”

“What?” He has no idea what could be bothering you.

“Your name isn’t Eugene, is it?” Your eyes are wide as you look at him.

Din lets out a loud laugh at how comically horrified you look at the prospect. He’s still chuckling as he tells you, “Hell no.”

“Thank the Maker,” you mutter under your breath, making Din laugh again.

You’ve made your way back to the Razor Crest now and it isn’t until you have to let go of him so that he can open the ramp, that you realize you’ve been holding Mando’s hand this entire time. It felt so natural and easy to walk holding his hand, and you hope he felt the same way. You watch as he tucks the child into his pram for the night. You should probably go get yourself ready for bed, but you want to keep talking to Mando.

“May I ask you a question?” You say as he turns back towards you.

“Of course.” He nods to you.

“Why were you so adamant about no kissing tonight? I mean not that I wanted to kiss Eugene,” you make a face at the idea, “But, it seemed to really bother you?”

“Oh” Is all that he says and then he looks away slightly. You wait patiently but for a while it seems as though that might be the only answer you get, until he finally says, “I didn’t want to see him kiss you. I don’t want to see any man kiss you.”

The air between you feels suddenly charged, and you look into his visor where you think his eyes are, and you can’t help yourself from asking, “Why not?”

“Because I can’t kiss you.” Mando admits.

“Do- do you want to kiss me?” You can’t believe you’re daring to ask him that but you need to know.

“It doesn’t matter what I want,” he says and you can hear frustration in his tone, “I shouldn’t and I can’t.”

“I would like to kiss you, but only if it’s something you want too,” you admit to him softly.

“I do want to kiss you,” Mando sighs and he moves towards you slightly but then holds himself in check.

“So Mandalorians don’t kiss? I just want to understand, I don’t want to pressure you to do anything you don’t want to do or that goes against your beliefs,” you explain, wanting him to understand that you respect his creed. You can’t deny how much you want to feel closer to him and show him how you feel, but the last thing you want is to make him uncomfortable or do something he’ll regret.

“They do, there are… loopholes, but I- I’ve never-, I want to, but-” Mando shifts his feet and looks down.

“It’s ok, I understand.” You’re quiet for a moment and you think perhaps you should just drop this. But then you can’t stop yourself from asking, “What about the Keldabe Kiss? Didn’t you say there was something softer?” Your face heats up as you remember that moment well; you’ve thought about it often.

“You remembered that?” Mando says in a low voice.

“It was pretty unforgettable, Mando,” you reply with a smile.

“There is a softer version. I could show you. If you’d let me.” His voice sounds hopeful.

“I’d like that.”

He steps closer to you then and seems to stare at your face for a long moment until you decide to close the distance between you two. You’re so close you can hear him breathing. He reaches up and places his large hands on either side of your face, holding you still, as he slowly brings his helmet down to touch your forehead. When he finally makes contact, you hear him let out a shaky breath. You bring your hands to his waist and pull him in a little closer to you as you maintain contact with him. While this isn’t what you pictured when you thought of kissing him, you can’t deny how intimate and special it feels. Just from the deliberate way that Mando is holding you, tells you how important this is for him. You stay like that holding each other and feeling suspended in time.

“I know this isn’t the same as real kissing,” Mando says, “but I like holding you like this. I’ve thought about doing this a lot.” His voice is so soft you almost feel like you imagined his confession.

“I like it too,” you tell him. You’re about to tell him how much you’ve thought about being held by him as well, when suddenly the child’s cries fill the air. Just like that, the moment between you and Mando is gone and you hurry over to pick up the little one and soothe him.

“I guess I should go get us on our way. Besides, he always sleeps better when we’re in hyperspace.” Din takes a step towards the ladder, but then pauses before coming over to you and dropping his helmet down onto your forehead again for just a few seconds. It’s a small gesture, but his heart soars at being able to do it. He gives the child a comforting pat on the back before turning away and heading to the cockpit, his head full of thoughts of you.

P.S. Don’t think that you missed hearing him call you cyar’ika, you’ll be sure to ask him about it later ;)

--------‐------------------------------------Thank you for reading! Here's the link to Chapter 5 Please let me know if you’d like to be tagged in later chapters.

Tag list: @im-the-nerdiest-of-them-a11 @theravenreads @nicotinebirds @boomtownboy @nova646 @wandering-storm-lost-shadow @becks-things @sleepwithacommunist @mackycat11 @som3thingcr3ative @punkdalek @pinkninja200 @s-unflowxr @ladyjenny19 @peppywitch @haley7242

#the mandalorian #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian fanfic #din djarin x reader #din djarin fanfic #the mandalorian x female reader #din djarin x female reader #the mandalorian fanfiction #din djarin fanfiction

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heresathreebee · 4 years ago

Text

A Real Date

[Ava Starr x Female!Reader]

Summary: You and Ava trying a dinner date that goes very wrong (just kidding it's actually fine).

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Word count: 1.8k words

Warning(s): 13+ | no-snap au, post-Ant Man and the Wasp, swearing, internalized homophobia(?), I think I’m working through something here this might be a little personal (sorry in advance), past relationship angst, presumed past of dating multiple genders but there is no definitive sexuality established for reader in the present, this was going to be something else but the story took over and I had to roll with it.

Author's note: no-snap au, post-Ant Man and the Wasp. I’m sorry I do not edit anymore, it only serves to stand in my way. This is part 3 of Ava Starr series beginning with Strawberry Soda. Art by Artmilla on DeviantArt (correct me if I’m wrong please)

It's important to note that not everything you see in media is the hegemonic truth. Take sapphic dating rituals for example: in media it’s a constant joke about how fast people move in together and own pets and plants like they were soulmates and always meant to be together. Which is nice to see– it’s not meant to be a cruel joke– but it does paint a picture of perfection. It doesn’t explicitly state whether your future wife is your first or fiftieth girlfriend but it sure as shit might lead you to believe every girl might be your last.

Real people don’t work that way. Real people have different interests, different lives, different traumas, different styles and needs. Every relationship is new and it has to be done deliberately and with care for what you and your partner want. So when you think about your relationship with Ava you can’t help but feel a little guilty.

Ava seems to like to take things slow. Your relationship prioritizes quality time over physical touch which you're fine with, but you can’t help it if you compare the details to other people you’ve dated. You’ve known each other for three months and in every other relationship by this time, you and your previous partners had hit a ton of milestones that you and Ava had just… not. So when you bring up the prospect of a ‘real date’ to Ava one night while cooking pasta in your kitchen, Ava chuckles.

“And what exactly constitutes as a ‘real date?’”

The television is playing some daytime television game show and the volume’s on low. You pass her the salt and take a swig from your beer with a shrug. Already you feel silly for bringing it up.

“Dinner. A movie. Sometimes both, I guess,” you say, flustered.

Ava raises an eyebrow at the softening bowtie noodles in the pot. “We’re having dinner right now…? Name one time we haven’t come back to your place to watch a movie.”

“The time the power went out and we played jenga by candlelight. But I– I mean like a date outside of the house.”

“We go to out to parks, the antique mall, lunch, the arcade–”

“Well, yeah I guess you’re right I just don’t know I still feel like–”

“Again, how is any of it different from a ‘real date?’”

“I don’t know! Just… just forget it.” you’re trying not to be bitter about it but you don’t even know what you mean so how could you explain it?

Ava calls your name softly and you already feel hot shame lick up your neck when you see her face. “I didn’t mean it like that, I– I just don’t think I understand what you mean and I want to! Honestly…”

You sigh and lean closer to her, careful not to touch but you want her to know you’re not mad. “No, I’m sorry. I just… I’ve been stuck on it for a week but I can’t seem to figure out why. Everything you’re saying I agree with but there’s still this nagging voice in my head telling me it’s not fair or I’m doing it wrong but I don’t know what it even is and I–”

You collapse onto the kitchen floor breathless. What the fuck were you even saying? Why was this bothering you so much? What ‘s different about this relationship than any other relationship you’ve already had? Your eyes are darting back and forth and your head is a million miles away. You keep talking as if saying it out loud will make your impulsive and intrusive thoughts and motivations clearer to you.

“It’s out of order. No, it’s not but it’s… with Jordan and Becky and Hal, I went on three dates before it felt normal. We did the traditional getting to know you stuff. Damien and Palavi were straight physical– not traditional at all but that still felt good enough somehow. And– and it’s not that I don’t believe what we have isn’t real, I just–

“Fuck, I don’t know! It feels a little like my relationship with Kat.” You can’t believe it but then the words were out there. You had never told anybody about Kat– Ava was still learning about the rest of them– but the instant those words left your mouth you regretted them. Ava was not Kat.

For instance, Ava slipped down to sit beside you on the floor– Kat would never lower herself to meet your eye. Ava looked at you and she saw you– Kat chose to ignore your feelings whenever it became more convenient to do so. Kat made you feel special and yet not special enough– OK maybe they shared a little bit of that. A tiny, micro piece of that.

“What was Kat like?” She said the words softly and without an ounce of jealousy.

You gather your mind with a deep breath. “Dating Kat was like being strapped to a rocket. It was like being a part of something bigger and stronger than me. Being with her made me feel inconsequential and sometimes I liked that, but then… then I realized I was just a dirty little secret. Kat liked me because I was convenient to her, not because she actually cared about me.

“When we talked or hung out, it had to be on her terms. No public, no friends or family, no social media. No one was allowed to know. She passed it off as just wanting me for herself but after she dumped me for something better I realized she never saw me as her equal. And it just… I was already in a dark place and that place just kind of got a whole lot darker after that. I felt especially not special.”

You lean back and rest your head on the cabinet under the sink. “I know that’s not you. Maybe I’m just tired of feeling like I have to hide a part of myself. I did a lot of stupid things in the public eye with Palavi, maybe part of that was because I was proud of who I am and I wanted everyone to know it?”

“I think I care too much about what other people think of me,” you said closing your eyes.

You didn’t expect to feel Ava lean her head against your shoulder but you don’t pull away. God, you could never pull away even as you worry she may be causing herself harm just to comfort you and your rambling. Her hair tickles a bit and smells like strawberries and lavender.

Ava lifted her head after a moment. “Let’s go on a real date then.”

Why the fuck were you so nervous? This was your idea! You had trouble picking a restaurant and picking a day and picking your clothes out and picking where to sit. So many choices with so much meaning or none at all. You just need this to be perfect because you hoped maybe this is what you need to stop that nagging in your head.

You made the call to meet each other there. You made the suggestion that it had to be somewhere nice– as in get dressed up nice. And darling, sweet, patient Ava let you have the control you so desperately needed. She offered suggestions here and there, and it helped you narrow everything down to a science. You feel a little self conscious sitting by yourself in your get up but you knew she'd be there on time.

It's just a matter of whether or not you could sit still for five more minutes.

You hold the cloth napkin in your palms to try and soak up the sweat. Forcing yourself to sit unnaturally still and you haven't touched your wine because you just know you'll get it everywhere somehow. Your eyes trace over the table to stop yourself from meeting the eyes of other patrons. Do nothing, wait it out.

Ava is stunning and you don't know she's there until the wait staff places the dinner menus in front of you. So much for pulling out her chair like you wanted to– but she's here and you break out into a big smile.

"You look amazing," you tell her.

Ava smiles and takes a sip of the rosé you ordered. The dim lighting in the room seems to soften the contours of her face but never the sharpness of her bright eyes. Something blossoms inside you and you feel it– that thing that's been bothering you like a knot in your stomach turns into a seed and its flowering now. This is your girlfriend. Not your friend who is a girl– your significant other. She's important to you and she has decided that she feels the same way about you.

You feel your body unwind, reaching across the table like you might touch her hand then stop an inch from her empty plate. She watches you curiously but without fear. After a beat, it's Ava who finishes the contact. She slips her hand into yours and you are delighted to discover she's not a corporeal being you've convinced yourself is real. Her skin is a little dry around the palm and she has calluses you never knew were there and she's real and this is happening.

You resist the urge to squeeze her fingers. Let her lead. Trust her to move away if she experiences any pain. She looks away from you with a flustered face you've never seen her wear and takes another draft of her wine.

"This is nice," she says softly.

You eat off each others' plates and you laugh together, and if anyone's watching you wouldn't know because for once you couldn't give a rat's ass what anyone thinks. You're with your person, for now or forever doesn't matter because she's letting you hold her hand and talk about a play you want to take her to on Saturday. Your heart flutters in your chest the whole way home and it’s not until you’re standing at your front door does her hand finally slip from yours. The feeling lingers though and your face hurts from smiling.

“This everything you wanted,” she asked.

“Yes,” you reply, “yes it was. Thank you for indulging me, it’s exactly what I needed.”

“I enjoyed it too.” She steps closer, seemingly reluctant to leave just yet. “We’re still going to see Rocky Horror Picture Show, right?”

“Absolutely,” you beam, “trust me, you’re gonna love it, it’s wild.” You blow her a kiss to send her on her way and spend the next hour giggling to yourself until you finally pass out from exhaustion.

#three bees writing #ava starr #ava starr x female reader #just girls being girlfriends #I'll make a masterlist for this soon I just want like two more fics

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yukippe · 4 years ago

Text

wonder what she thinks of me

for @yuekiweek day 3: reunions | word count: 2.3k | read on ao3

“you need to buy your books suki!!” sokka lectures through the phone. last year suki didn’t buy the books for any of her classes and she was fine. she isn’t actually planning on buying books this year either, except now sokka’s roped her into coming to his book club and she can’t lie and say she doesn’t like to watch sokka rant about something dumb while enjoying the baked goods that sokka will have convinced his gran gran and his parents to make for them.

unfortunatley, this means suki has to brave the bookstore during some fancy author signing to try to buy the book sokka’s demanded everyone read for next week. he’s still talking through the phone, though suki’s mostly tuned him out. she’s normally much better at listening to sokka’s rants, but the bookstore is packed with awkward high school students and suki would rather not, at the moment. she slips around a table of overpriced waterbottles and planners and weaves past a random grandpiano over to one of the computers with the bookstore directory. “sokka,” suki asks as she almost trips over a four year old holding a picture book. “why did you have to send me to this bookstore at this time?”

there’s a huff on the other end of the line and suki sighs deeply, “suki, please you should be thankful! they’re running a special discount if you buy a tote bag to go with the book this weekend!!” well. okay, maybe suki collects tote bags and sokka is probably being a good friend. but suki hasn’t been to this store before, having not bothered with buying her textbooks last year and getting anything for fun as an ebook. but sokka believes in the experience of a physical copy or whatever, so tote bags and author signings it is.

suki puts her phone between her shoulder and ear as she sets her fingers onto the keyboard of the computer directory, “hey, what’s the name of the book again?”

“have you listened to anything i’ve ever said to you?” sokka asks her. suki can picture him in their apartment at his desk, doing something fancy with math as he coaches her through a bookstore, pinching the bridge of his nose out of frustration. suki doesn’t actually need him to tell her the name of the book, she just likes to rile him up sometimes. she types in the title. suki thanks him for his help, asks him if hes found his glasses yet (the same glasses she hid before she left) and hangs up with a smirk.

adaptation by malinda lo. there, young adult section. it’s supposedly sci fi thriller and sokka, though he lacks taste in most things, has always had solid book taste. suki looks around for the sign to section she needs and spots it, tucked behind a tech display and next to the little cafe. suki walks over, eager to grab her book and get out of the shop. she walks through the shelves searching for the author’s with the last name l. malinda lo. there, suki reaches out to pluck the book of the shelf, when the back of her hand brushes against someone else.

suki steps back, book in hand, to look at the girl next to her. she has brown hair in a pretty updo and really cute heart shaped beaded earrings. she looks familiar, but suki isn’t sure where she recognizes her from.

“hi,” the other girl says, her voice sounds like a princess. all bells and whistling wind.

“uh,” suki coughs, smiling crookedly and titling her head. “hi!”

the other girl giggles at her, but her smile is warm and suki finds herself settling. “i’m yue - so adaptation? what made you interested in it?”

“oh, my friend is hosting a book club and this is this months pick,” suki tells her. maybe she should have done a little more research on the book before she’d shown up. she hadn’t really pictured a bookstore as the spot to meet a cute girl.

“oh!” yue says, surprised. “i have the same one assigned for my book club. do you want to grab something to drink and let me tell you about it?”

“sure,” suki says, her smile growing even wider. “that sounds great”

yue winks at her as she grabs the same book of the shelf, “perfect, there’s this bubble tea place a block a way i want to show you.” yue turns on her heel, her hair falling onto her back as yue bounces in her steps. suki checks to make sure her flannel is neat and her docs are tied before hurrying after yue.

the two of them wait in line one behind the other at the register and yue flips through the display before the register of pins and pens and bookmarks. a rainbow lion turtle eraser set catches suki’s eye and she lifts it up to her face to look at it closer. it’s the type of thing aang would like, so suki puts it on top of her book when she gets to the register. after she picks out the simplest canvas tote bad (most of them have obnoxious book puns katara would make fun of her for months about) and pays, suki finds yue waiting by the door peeling a sticker off of a sticker sheet suki remembers seeing on the display.

“so,’ yue asks. “where do you want your sticker?”

suki blinks, “what?”

yue waves the - oh it’s a hello kitty sticker with fairy wings. suki blinks at it, “um. cute?” she gets a smile for her efforts and then yue leans in and grabs her wrist, turning suki’s hand around and carefully placing the sticker onto the back of suki’s right hand.

“so,” yue says, after failing once more to steal a drink of suki’s boba. her mouth is screwed up in a light pout, but it feels teasing. “do you go to ba sing se u?”

only a little while later, they are wandering to nowhere in particular, still holding hands. yue keeps trying to steal a sip of suki’s drink even though when suki ordered yue had made a face at the idea of coffee boba. yue’s own drink is sweet like her. strawberry, reportedly to match yue’s nails which are done up in a neat mimic of the fruit.

suki nods, squeezing yue’s hand and lifting her drink over her head, too high up for yue to reach, though that doesn’t stop yue from playfully batting at it. neither of them caring about what passerby might think as they wobble on the sidewalk smiling at each other full of silliness. “yeah, i’m majoring in gender and women's studies with a minor in literature and art.”

yue lights up, the way she’s done every time suki’s shared a fact with her. suki’s face feels flushed, yue makes her feel like she’s on her first date ever. “oh wow!” yue says. “i’m majoring in four nations politics with a minor in theology and spiritual studies but i would love to see what your classes must be like. i think i could be a student forever, you know?”

and then yue doesn’t let go of suki’s wrist. instead, she links their fingers together and suki watches their hands held together hang between them. she looks up and smiles at yue, stupidly happy for a moment. and really, suki doesn’t even know for sure if yue is into girls even if yue does seem to be flagging. for now, suki just lets yue tug her down the street as her phone buzzes in her new tote bag with texts from sokka she’ll ignore for now.

“hm, not really, i think one degree is enough for me. but academics are cute,” suki says, watching as yue swings their hands back and forth as they walk. they’re both absolutely terrible at walking together, suki’s noticed. they can’t seem to walk in a straight line and suki’s almost fallen off the sidewalk twice already. it’s nice. suki’s finding that yue makes her comfortable everywhere.

“oh?” yue asks, her eyes twinkling. “does that mean you think i’m cute, suki?”

“hmmm,” suki teases out, a trace of laughter in her voice as yue finally manages to dart forward to steal her drink, finally realizing her success would be increased if she let go of suki’s hand. suki doesn’t even mind that much, wow. “well,” suki settles, after a moment of false consideration. “yeah, i think you’re pretty cute.”

yue winks at her, the same way she did in the bookstore, and takes a sip of suki’s bubble tea. then she makes a completely disgusted expression shoving suki’s drink back at her. “suki! that’s so gross, tui and la, how do you drink that?”

suki can’t help the laugh that spills out of her as yue sticks her tongue out and crosses her eyes, making a fuss that shouldn’t be as sweet as it is. well, suki’s always been a sucker for clowns. suki reaches out and links their hands back together and they both sip at their drink as they seem to stop together at the bus.

they make shy eye contact as a bus comes up to the stop. “so,” yue says. “i’ve got to go, i’m meeting up with a friend. but this was really fun, right?”

suki smiles, “yeah, it was really fun.”

“that’s great! i really liked talking with you!” yue informs her. then, yue leans forward and kisses suki’s cheek before turning around, and her earrings sparkle in the sunlight as she jumps onto the bus right before the bus doors close and it pulls away with the rest of the flow of traffic. suki blinks and watches it go, still feeling the soft touch of yue’s lips on her cheek.

when suki pulls her phone out of her bag to video call sokka he immediately points out the lipstick mark on her cheek and she resolves not to give him any details, no matter how much he pesters her

two weeks later, after bemoaning to ty lee about how she was dumb and completley forgot to ask the cute girl she met at the book store for her number, she sees yue again. at sokka’s book club.

the members of the secret book club hadn’t been a surprise for the most part, consisting of sokka (obviously), aang (one of sokka’s only friends who wasn’t a gay girl), azula, mai, ty lee and suki (the gay girls sokka was friends with). sokka’s parents, hakoda, kya and bato, had baked with sokka all last night and prepared a whole table full of snacks that sokka had made her haul over to their apartment. suki thinks it’s a ridiculous amount of food for their handful of friends, and then she and sokka ate a good section of it before their friends even show up.

mai, sokka and azula are arguing over the finer points of the book already even though the meeting has yet to officially start. sokka and azula, to be fair, have actual opinions that they are fiercly defending from their spots on the floor as mai causes problems on purpose on the couch she and ty lee stole as soon as they stepped through the front door.

there was only one person that had yet to arrive, and apparently only aang had met her before. azula had raised an eyebrow at the pronoun and asked sokka if he’d made friends with another gay girl. the answer had been yes, and suki who was looking for another chance at talking to a cute gay girl after flopping earlier in the month and failing at getting yue’s number or social media or anything, was looking forward to meeting the newest cute gay girl sokka was friends with.

sokka had impeccable taste in cute gay girls (besides azula). so really, maybe suki shouldn’t have been so surprised to answer the door when the bell rang to find yue holding a tray of pastries.

yue stands out in the hallway with its broken light, looking as pretty as the moon in the sky. her face breaks into a smile at the sight of suki, and suki’s sure her expression matches. “suki?!” yue asks. “wow, small world huh?”

suki nods back, her cheeks starting to hurt with how big she was beaming. “so,” suki says. “do you think i could make up for last week and get your number?”

laughter comes from behind suki, and suki knows her friends are probably making fun of them right now, but she’s too interested in yue’s answer to pay any attention.

yue rolls her eyes, but she doesn’t stop smiling, “of course suki, now do you want to help me bring these in so i can program it into your phone? no excuses not to call me this time.”

“don’t worry,” suki says as she takes the sweets from yue. “i’ll be sure to blow your phone up more than sokka when he’s trying to prove a point.”

she’s rewarded with another kiss to her cheek (and teasing from her friends at another lipstick stain) and yue’s number in her phone saved as yue🌙💖😘.

yue, through suki’s phone, texts something to herself and suki leans over yue’s shoulder to see what it is.

omg yue you’re so hot please go out with me <3

suki bumps yue’s shoulder as best as she can with her hands full and raises an eyebrow. “so, yue?” suki asks. “will you go out with me?”

yue giggles, her lipgloss sparkles and suki wonders what it tastes like, “of course, suki.”

a few seconds later, suki has her question answered and can confidently report that yue’s lipgloss tastes like mango.

suki passes the tray off to sokka, who was helpfully waiting right behind her with the tried familiar expression of accidentally setting up his exes. then, suki tugs yue into the loveseat, kicking out aang who had been sprawled across it.

book club is much more fun than suki was expecting, though almost all things are improved, suki finds, when she’s hanging out with her friends and eating sweets and practically sitting in the girl she likes lap while yue braids her hair and teases sokka with her. yue winks at her as aang and ty lee stop azula and sokka from getting into a fistfight with mai and sticks another hello kitty sticker onto her cheek. suki leans over and kisses the same spot on yue. fair is fair after all.

#atla #yueki #yue #suki #yuekiweek #r.txt #rey's writering #i love how i post before im finished bc im impatient and then i edit for days/j ;_; /

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shemakesmusic-uk · 4 years ago

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Simpson is a Richmond-based singer and rapper who you may also know as Babe Simpson, one-fourth of the Tumblr-born rap collective Barf Troop. They dazed the internet back in the early 2010s with their uncensored, forward-thinking rhymes and aesthetics, and even got the attention of Drake. Though the collective has gone silent in recent years, Simpson has since cultivated her own steady following around her soft, and ruminative tunes. Her latest is 'Cherry Ice Cream Sundae,' a song about "treating ourselves with as much tenderness as we treat everyone else," she says, and is backed by a lush landscape of jazzy guitars and drums — a sound that could be considered a close sibling to the rap lullabies of Noname. Simpson's now sharing the song's peculiar video, which features a charming but eerie cast of marionette puppets. Over email, Simpson explains that she wrote the song after experiencing "a feeling that I’ve always been trying to put into words but I don’t think I was mature enough to be able to sing. I reached my breaking point where I was like, f*ck it, whatever happens, happens, and I’m gonna look on the bright side everywhere I can. I’m going to 'smile because I can.' I actually changed the original opening lyrics from 'The world is in the shitter' to 'Life is kind to who’s kind to it back.' The world has always been in the shitter, but that hasn’t made it any less special or sweet. I think that’s made me much more of a realist. I recorded it tipsy, upside down, hanging off my bed as a freestyle, and it felt so natural saying and listening to it back made me feel so proud." [via NYLON]

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Earlier this week, Lana Del Rey revealed the artwork and tracklist for her new album Chemtrails Over The Country Club. Back in October, Del Rey shared the album’s lead single 'Let Me Love You Like A Woman.' It was the first song she shared from the album after postponing its planned September release. Now, she’s sharing the album’s second single and title track. She’s also announced that Chemtrails Over The Country Club will be out March 19. In a lengthy interview with BBC Radio 1 — during which she talked about the Trump insurrection and her album cover controversy — she mentioned that Jack Antonoff produced much of the album, minus 'Yosemite,' which was produced with Rick Nowels. Watch a music video for the album’s title track, directed by BRTHR, above. In a different kind of statement, prior to the release of the 'Chemtrails Over The Country Club' music video, Del Rey explained why she is wearing a cast in it: "When you see my second video for this album, don’t think that the fact I’m wearing a cast is symbolic for anything other than thinking I was still a pro figure skater. I wiped out on my beautiful skates before the video even began after a long day of figure eights and jumps in the twilight of the dezert. Anyways my fracture isn’t that bad kind of goes with my new bucket hat. Thanks to my beautiful family for my gifts." [via Stereogum]

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Joining forces for the new uplifting track, G Flip and mxmtoon are sharing new empowerment anthem ‘Queen’, produced by Rostam Batmanglij. "'Queen' was written about the strong women around me, the queens that raised me and the queens I’ve met through my years,” G Flip explains. “My idea of a queen is not necessarily linked to gender; queens come in all forms and walks of life. To me a queen embodies power and strength; they embrace all they are fiercely yet gracefully. The song was written one sunny day in LA, I was chillin on Rostam’s lovely white couch and he turned around to me and said ‘how about we write a song about Queens’ and I replied with ‘F@!K yeah!’. I’m also super stoked to have mxmtoon on the track with me, she is an absolute queen. I first was introduced to her when I was trying to find ukulele chords to a Khalid song and found her cover on YouTube years ago. She makes awesome music and her voice has such a cruisy timbre to it so I was thrilled to have her jump on 'Queen' with me. She is also an avid croc lover and part of the LGBTQIA+ community, so obviously it just made sense!” mxmtoon adds, “So happy to be a part of ‘Queen’ with G! she and Rostam were such a joy to work with and so so much fun to collaborate with on creative as well. I’m so glad that it’s still possible to make art and music with someone even when they’re on the other side of the world, and I’m lucky that I got the opportunity to feature on G’s song. ‘Queen’ is a power anthem for any person, and I’m so excited for people to love it as much as we do!” [via DIY]

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With her hotly-anticipated new album Magic Mirror out now, Pearl Charles gave us our latest teaser of what to expect earlier this week, sharing new glitzy bop ‘Only For Tonight’. “‘Only for Tonight’ tells the story of a currently bygone era of wild nights out on the town - the highs and lows of one night stands and the crashes of the morning after,” she explains. “The music video, directed by Bobbi Rich, leans into those excesses, paying a sparkly homage to the late-night musical television shows of the 70’s, from Soul Train to The Midnight Special, as well as the gauzy, Vaseline’d lens of ABBA’s music videos. With an added sprinkling of VHS special effects, you’re likely to feel like you’re watching a home-taped recording of a lost episode of Top of the Pops.” [via DIY]

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Alt-pop trailblazer dodie has shared her new single 'Hate Myself' in full. Everything the songwriter touches seems to turn into melodic gold, with her debut album Build A Problem landing this Spring. Out on March 5, it's led by new single 'Hate Myself', which made its bow as Annie Mac's Hottest Record In The World. It's an apt title, with this instantly-viral moment offering an "inner monologue" that touches on some of dodie's inner-most feelings. The song depicts "someone who seems to find themselves in relationships of any kind with people who deal with their feelings internally - unfortunately resulting in assuming the issue is with them." dodie co-directed the video alongside Sammy Paul, shooting at the Cornish seaside village Polperro. The pair "excitedly landed on the silly idea of the training leading up to becoming a post-lady, and thoroughly enjoyed planning the many bizarre exercises she would have to perfect. Our excellent Art Director, Louis Grant, worked on bringing her home and training station to life. Though jogging on cliff tops in the rain, carrying a large sack and slipping in the mud was certainly cold and exhausting, I think I preferred it to slowly feeling sicker, licking stamps on a swaying boat by the Excel." [via Clash]

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Berlin-based indie five-piece People Club are back with new single and video 'Francine', following on from their last release 'Lay Down Your Weapons', which focused on police brutality. The new single 'Francine' tackles the topics of addiction and lovelessness. In the words of the band: "The song speaks from the voice of a lamenting partner whose lover (Francine) is helplessly addicted to drugs. Francine lost interest in her relationship with the narrator a long time ago. It's a song about commitment and how love can fade away leaving only wickedness behind." Regarding the visuals, the band said "The 'Francine' video is a play on the old idiom of 'being your own worst enemy'. A phrase which quite beautifully captures the inner critic which we know so well, especially during the course of the pandemic - we've had to learn to each give ourselves a break. The video was shot in the depth of the harsh Berlin winter, in the depth of the pandemic." Director Felix Spitta added "I love the band and I love the different personalities. It is always heaps of fun working on creative output together. Riding through Berlin only with bikes and all the film equipment in the freezing cold almost felt like a masochistic idea from Saxon. It's inspiring to be surrounded by so many creative minds.”

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Pale Waves are back with 'Easy', the third single to be shared from their highly-anticipated second album Who Am I?. Lead vocalist Heather Baron-Gracie describes the new track as "a song about how love can change your whole entire perspective on life itself. It’s saying ‘being in love with you is so easy, you finally make sense in my life because nothing did before'." The new single is accompanied by a James Slater-directed video that shows Baron-Gracie performing at a Tim Burton/medieval-style wedding in an abandoned church. Baron-Gracie adds, "I wore a wedding dress throughout and we shot the video in an old abandoned church. I’m really inspired by the gothic medieval aesthetic and at the time I was thinking of the video I was watching a lot of Tim Burton films whose creativity really inspires me." Pale Waves' second album will follow their 2018 debut LP My Mind Makes Noises. Baron-Gracie says of their upcoming album, "For me, music and art is for people not to feel so alone and isolated. I want to be that person my fans look up to and find comfort in." [via the Line Of Best Fit]

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The official video for Zoe Wees’ new single, 'Girls Like Us,' is online now. Like the song, the clip sends a message of togetherness and solidarity to girls around the world who are feeling the pressures of society. Zoe Wees says, “It’s not always good to think about how you look to the rest of the world. It’s much more important to think about how you feel inside. It is not easy to call yourself beautiful but being confident helps you to accept and love yourself.” The 18-year-old Hamburg, Germany-based artist adds, “We’re walking through a world with blinded eyes. At the end of the day, we all go to bed without make-up with the ugliest clothes and wake up with the messiest hair on earth.”

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Julien Baker has shared a new taste of her forthcoming album Little Oblivions by way of a new single ‘Hardline’. Julien says, “A few years ago I started collecting travel ephemera again with a loose idea of making a piece of art with it. I had been touring pretty consistently since 2015 and had been traveling so much that items like plane tickets and hotel keycards didn't have much novelty anymore. So I saved all my travel stuff and made a little collage of a house and a van out of it. I wanted to incorporate it into the record and when we were brainstorming ideas for videos we came across Joe Baughman and really liked his work so we reached out with the idea of making a stop-motion video that had similar aesthetic qualities as the house I built did. I don't know why I have the impulse to write songs or make tiny sculptures out of plane tickets. But here it is anyway: a bunch of things I've collected and carried with me that I've re-organized into a new shape.” The video for ‘Hardline’ was directed by Joe Baughman, who notes: “Man, even after having spent 600 hours immersed in ‘Hardline’ and having listened to it thousands of times, I am still moved by it. It was a fun and ambitious challenge creating something that could accompany such a compelling song. The style of the set design, inspired by a sculpture that Julien created, was especially fun to work in. I loved sifting through magazines, maps, and newspapers from the 60s and 70s and finding the right colors, shapes, and quotes to cover almost every surface in the video.”

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Teenage Joans are staying true to their world and unveiling 'Something About Being Sixteen', a new single that's sure to cement their 2021 as victorious. It's the perfect successor to 'Three Leaf Clover' and a track that makes it two-for-two for Teenage Joans, further capturing the excitement and energy within Cahli and Tahlia as they trade catchy riffs and thriving choruses with the combo of light-heartedness and intimateness that seems to define Teenage Joans' work, and how they're able to look in at themselves (and out at the world around them) through a lens that keeps it fun and digestable. "'Something About Being Sixteen' is undoubtedly Teenage Joans' great take on the classic coming of age rock tune, generally closing our live sets with audiences singing along every time without fail," the duo say on the single. [via Pilerats]

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Kate Hollowell took a risk going by the moniker Number One Popstar when she released her debut single 'Psycho.' However, Hollowell didn’t mind if that choice set her up for failure or not. She goes with the flow. Luckily, that mentality has advanced her even farther. Now, Number One Popstar releases her second single, 'I Hate Running.' New Year’s resolutions are, most of the times, created for the wrong reasons. It’s also no surprise that majority of people’s goals center around exercising and weight loss. 'I Hate Running', however, challenges that mindset, satirizing the toxic nature of exercise industry and diet culture. Hollowell said herself, “The song explores facing the hard, emotional work instead of the physical. I really don’t enjoy running, and I wanted to troll the exercise industry and write an anti-motivational song.” In terms of sound, 'I Hate Running' shares similar vibes to her first single with its classic 80s pop of saturated synths. But, this time, there’s a hint of disco with the zealous psychedelic guitar and electric drums and keys. The interludes consist of a symbolic, robotic, and almost sinister snippet from a workout instructor. It all complements well with Hollowell’s escapist lyrics. Even though the lyrics say otherwise, the track’s sound might just spark that motivation to workout or dance, doing mindful movement that makes us feel good. Exercise should never feel like a punishment, and Number One Popstar is here to remind us. She makes us want to stick it to the exercise industry, proving to it that we will only work out for the right reasons. [via Earmilk]

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Alt-pop riser Chloe Rodgers has shared her new video 'The Algea' in full. The Nottingham based talent sparkled in 2020 in spite of the pervasive gloom, releasing two startling singles. Her third release could be her best yet, with 'The Algea' hitting streaming services just before Christmas. The video captures those mid-winter chills, while providing a platform for Chloe to express herself. Constructed alongside creative director Kate Lomas, it was shot at Newstead Abbey in Nottingham. Chloe comments... "I wanted to use a music box in the video to represent being objectified and getting stuck in the same cycles, as that’s largely what the song is about. I wrote the song when I was 18, but didn’t add the verse at the end about claiming my power back until a couple of years later when I felt a bit stronger. We tried to reflect this in the video too with the Chloe in white sort of protecting the other Chloe of the past." Kate Lomas adds: "This was such a joy to watch come together, the video concept is based around the idea that Chloe is the character in a music box, she’s the performer that’s spinning round on an endless cycle for other people’s entertainment. The video tells the tale of Chloe definitely breaking this cycle and no longer playing this role." [via Clash]

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Jaguar Jonze has announced her ANTIHERO EP will be released on April 16 via Nettwerk Records. With the EP announcement, Deena shares the official music video for her latest single, 'ASTRONAUT,' the follow-up to two previously released videos for 'DEADALIVE' and 'MURDER'. Each of the five music videos for the forthcoming ANTIHERO EP will come together through bold-palette videos that transform into an antihero character “in a cyberpunk, anime, futuristic, graphic, almost sci-fi world,” says Deena. Deena adds, “as ‘ASTRONAUT’ delves into my anxiety, I wanted the film to reflect that in a simple way that helped portray how my anxiety can sometimes manifest - a contradiction between feeling lost in vast spaces and trapped in claustrophobic spaces. I had a specific idea in mind, which meant that I had to undergo stunt training with professionals and learn how to maneuver in a wire harness. Most of the video had to be shot in a single take because of the stunts' nature in safety preparation, time consumption, and impact on the body. I'm still recovering from the bruises, but it was all worth it, and the team was amazing in pulling it all together. I'm proud of this one as it is 3 minutes of my rawest vulnerability, visually interpreted. I'm also finally ready to share it.” 'ASTRONAUT' is the sound of Deena liberating herself from a lifelong battle with anxiety. “It is a human trait. It’s how we survive in the wild,” she says. “We’re all wired as humans to be quite anxious. As females more so, because we’re more susceptible to danger.”

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Rising star Mulay shares the smoking visuals for her new single, ‘Antracyte’. It’s the culminating release in a three-part video series from the Berlin-based alternative R&B singer-songwriter/producer/artist, ahead of her highly anticipated EP, which comes out at the end of the month via Groenland Records. Mulay explains about the single, “'ANTRACYTE' is the intro and title track to my debut EP. It’s the soundtrack to the birth of a villain and captures the moment of complete honesty to yourself about the awareness of doing wrong by the ones you love while feeling the inability to turn around. It’s about the desire to taste forbidden fruits, to cross and explore what lies beyond the line and the self-empowering feeling of playing by your own rules defeating the fear of consequences and the power of moral concepts. 'ANTRACYTE' tells a story of contradicting emotions, a story of love, lust, pain and a longing for more. It’s about facing your own darkness and sins, about self-revelation, emancipation and about paying its price, resigning to your fate.”

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Only a band like shallow pools could make a blast of 'ice water' sound refreshing and necessary in the dead of New England winter. But the Massachusetts indie-pop group is usually pushing against the current of what we’d normally expect, and now the quartet hits us with a dose of cold reality through their new single and video. 'ice water' is a vivid new single that confronts the mental health struggles brought on by quarantine and isolation, and even the shallow pools aesthetic has reflected this by shifting from bright glowing neons to a more subdued color palette of beiges and browns. Call it a sign of the times, and call 'ice water' the sound of now; upbeat and jovial on the surface, a comet of pop smarts and hooks, but with the darker shine that resides in our lives when we’re positioned away from the screens and digital scenes. As Glynnis Brennan sings “Every day’s the same and / There’s no breaking out / Like I’m stuck here / Going through the motions now” well, we feel that. shallow pools describe “ice water” as “a departure from the music we’ve made in the past, but it’s the perfect bridge between our old and new sound.” That is certainly the case, and 'ice water' continues to showcase the group as one of New England’s sharpest, following a string of 2020 singles that included pop standouts like 'Haunted' and 'Afterlight'. “We wrote the song with our friend and producer, Chris Curran, and learned a lot about the type of music we want to be making in the process,” the band adds. “The song is about the impact that the state of the world has had on our mental health, specifically in the last year. We’re excited to share it and hope that anyone who has had similar experiences will find some comfort in knowing that there are others who can relate.” [via Vanyaland]

#videos of the week #simpson #lana del rey #g flip #mxmtoon #pearl charles #dodie #people club #pale waves #zoe wees #julien baker #teenage joans #number one popstar #chloe rodgers #mulay #jaguar jonze #shallow pools

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beyond-the-mirror · 5 years ago

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DMC x Pokemon AU - Which pokemon they would choose

So an idea appeared out of nowhere in my head: If Pokemon somehow existed in the DMC universe and pokemon training and battles were officially a thing too, which pokemon would the crew choose as their companions?

For these headcanons, I will give each character two kinds of pokemon: the first one will be a pokemon they would totally choose as a friend and partner for adventure as well as competitive battles, and the other will be one they would keep at their side mostly as a cute or silly companion, whether it’s a baby pokemon or a fully evolved one, it’s one they are really fond of and always look after.

So let’s get started! More bellow the cut because it’s a really long post.

Dante

Ideal partner: Houndoom

He considers Houndoom’s general appearance as cool and badass, of course he would love having a literal hellhound in his team.

If you think about it, they share lots of similarities: The same color palette, the devil motif, the fact that Dante has horns too when in DT or SDT form… it’s as if this pokemon was made with him in mind.

Dante found him when he was a little puppy Houndour. The poor thing was all alone in an alley near his shop and seeing him crying out made his heart ache.

So he brought the little one back home and nursed him. Now he’s a powerful Houndoom who loves nothing more than to fight alongside his trainer. There’s nothing that can stop those too when together.

Silly companion: Alcremie

Obviously.

One reason only: Infinite strawberry sundaes.

That’s it.

Would totally have an entire team made of Alcremies. He wouldn’t even battle or anything. He just wants to enjoy his lifetime supply of strawberry sundaes.

Vergil

Ideal partner: Aegislash

Vergil is a man of the sword, so it’s clear he would choose an Aegislash as his partner.

The first time he spotted this particular Honedge, he knew. He could see the great power dormant in them, so it was a matter of awakening said potential.

He trained them vigorously, making them evolve into a Doublade, and finally, into an Aegislash. To this day, not a single pokemon has managed to defeat them, the only exception being Dante and his Houndoom.

That won’t stop them though. They are both too prideful in their quest for strength and power.

Silly companion: Snom

Yeaaah, this is a weird one. Snom is such a cute baby, maybe this adorableness can melt Vergil’s heart?

It was Dante who gifted his twin a Snom. To quote him: “You’re too grumpy. Maybe this cute little guy can help you ease some of that grumpiness away.”

Wherever he goes, the little baby follows behind. Vergil will never admit this out loud but he does smile at the peaceful sensation his silly friend gives him.

Also imagine him trying to pronounce their name in that nasal voice of his. SHnom.

Ideal partner: Corviknight, Umbreon and Dusknoir

It was a tie between these pokemon since they represent V’s three demon familiars: Griffon, Shadow and Nightmare respectively.

Corviknight may have a playful personality, but during battles he’s dead serious. He’s down right merciless and enjoys tearing apart his foes.

Umbreon is as calm as a housecat, but beware! She is a fierce one and won’t think twice to attack those who step out of line. Even more ruthless than Corviknight.

Dusknoir is as mysterious as the man himself, but V still trusts them and lets them do pretty much their own thing. Despite V never giving them orders, it almost looks as if Dusknoir can understand his thoughts telepathically. No one is sure how the hell he does it though. Quite a mystery indeed.

Silly companion: Mr Rime

Both wear a coat. Both carry a cane. Both love to tap dance. See what I’m getting at?

The first time V spotted a Mr Rime and witnessed their comical moves, he couldn’t help but laugh in endearment.

You will often find them enjoying a nice cup of tea together. They may speak different languages, but somehow they understand each other so perfectly.

When feeling in a dance mood, he and Mr Rime will dance together in perfect harmony and sync. Singin’ in the Rain is their favorite musical btw.

Nero

Ideal partner: Toxtricity

It only made sense to grant our punk boy Nero a punk pokemon like Toxtricity.

Both share an explosive and energetic personality, as well as an identical inclination towards rock and metal music. They especially love taunting their foes by doing an air guitar together.

The way these two fight is absolutely brutal. Do not anger them, you cannot defeat them.

However, despite their looks like they could kill you, they are actually sweet cinnamon rolls in front of the right ones. Pet them, they are good bois after all.

Silly companion: Mankey

Two grumpy bois grumpying around. Don’t talk to them, they are angy.

Kyrie often teases them with how identical they are. They literally share the exact same expression when angry.

Nero says it’s not funny. It is.

Little Mankey only calms down when given pets and cuddles. “Just like you Nero!” she teases again.

Trish

Ideal partner: Luxray

Step aside everyone. Two bewitching and electrifying devils are coming through.

Trish was new to the world when one day she encountered a Shinx, except their fur was yellow? Wasn’t the fur supposed to be blue??

She took them to Dante and Lady for an explanation. Their eyes widened in complete awe. “Trish… it’s a shiny. You found a shiny!” “…Oh.”

Now the two are an inseparable and lethal duo. Many have made the mistake of challenging them, only to end up battered and humiliated.

Silly companion: Yamper

Just look at this good boi.

A cute pupper? AND with electrical powers?! Trish is so in!

You bet she spoils her Yamper rotten. She particularly adores baby-talking her lovely companion to no end.

“Have you seen my puppy? He’s not lost or anything, I just wanted to show you how awesome he is” Yep. She did this at one point or another.

Lady

Ideal partner: Inteleon

A couple of ‘Walking Arsenals’ indeed. Ready to take on any challenge they may encounter.

Lady remembers how she met her partner when they were a tiny and shy Sobble. Now that they’ve become such a strong pokemon, Lady feels so proud of their growth.

Extremely resourceful, even in dire situations. Will use all the tools at their disposition to finish their job.

Their sniper skills are unparalleled so you’d better watch out. In a battle of wits, there’s no beating this duo.

Silly companion: Eevee

Lady is such an Eevee fan, her childhood dream was to befriend one and have numerous adventures together.

So when she finally got one many years later, she actually started crying happy tears. (It was a gift from Dante. He figured she deserved a companion after what happened in the Temen-ni-gru incident.)

She spends her free time playing with her adorable Eevee, there’s even a whole collection of toys for their playtime together.

If you happen to have an Evolution Stone with you, DO. NOT. COME. ANY. CLOSER. Lady adores her Eevee just how it is. You have been warned.

Kyrie

Ideal partner: Gardevoir

I personally consider Kyrie as a woman with a righteous heart and a strong sense of justice just like her brother Credo, so it’s no surprise her pokemon partner is actually a Gardevoir.

Mess with them and hoo boy. So you have chosen death.

She and Gardevoir are actually among the strongest teams in the region. In fact, to this day, Nero and his Toxtricity haven’t been able to defeat these two in a pokemon battle.

Do not underestimate these girls. They can and will drag you through the mud if you dare hurt them or their loved ones.

Silly companion: Wooloo

Kyrie melted at the sight of Wooloo. So soft, and adorable, and puffy!

She loves knitting, so they would be perfect to provide her with lots of top quality wool.

Once during Christmas, she donated handmade sweaters to the children at the local orphanage. Wooloo and her were so happy to help the little ones, they made it a tradition for them to do every year.

The sweaters and scarfs she knits with the help of her friend are actually very fashionable and pretty. Everyone in the crew loves showing theirs off any chance they get.

Nico

Ideal partner: Arcanine

A fire pokemon with majestic fur, excellent speed and an extremely keen sense of smell. Nico knew Arcanine would be a perfect partner to have.

She can count on their powerful fire to melt the metals she needs to forge her weapons. Her works of art have been made possible thanks to them and she could not feel more thankful.

Using their olfactory sense, Arcanine can track and retrieve any demon parts or carcasses which can later be used to create Devil Arms.

Although they are not that interested in competitive battles, they’re still a very strong duo that should not be taken so lightly.

Silly companion: Rotom

So one day a wild Rotom sneaked into Nico’s van, causing a ruckus everywhere. Despite the disaster, Nico was incredibly fascinated since Rotom sightings are extremely rare.

She befriended the poltergeist pokemon almost right away. She even built a device for them to inhabit (just like Ash’s Rotomdex in the anime).

Now they’re Nico’s very own pokemon assitant! Thanks to her device Rotom can communicate, take pictures and save files and notes, which is perfect for her work.

Also they’re really nice to have a chat with! Just beware the unflattering pics they may take during battles.

Lucia

Ideal partner: Absol

It’s easy to see the similarities between Lucia and her Absol.

With Absol being erroneously blamed for natural disasters and Lucia being an artificial demon her creator labelled as ‘defective’, you could say they both share similar backstories. They felt outcasted by everyone else.

These two are incredibly agile fighters, using graceful and precise moves that prove to be lethal to their foes.

Personality wise they both appear to be stoic and aloof, but they’re actually very kind. They do tend to worry a lot about their friends though.

Silly companion: Espurr

Espurrs are known to constantly try to control and contain their enormous psychic power with all their might. Lucia understands her cute little companion all too well.

Being with each other has helped them both a lot, their shared company feels therapeutic for them.

Also Lucia enjoys cuddling Espurr. They feel so soft like a plushie!

Often have staring contests with each other. They always end with a tie though.

#devil may cry #dmc headcanons #dmc x pokemon au #pokemon

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writings-of-a-hufflepuff · 5 years ago

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Mixing Traditions

Fandom: Harry Potter

Pairing: Charlie Weasley x Reader (No pronouns are used, reader isn’t described)

Warnings: N/A

Writer: @imaginesofeveryfandom aka @hufflepuffing-all-day-long

Summary/Request: Carving Pumpkins with Charlie.

Notes: Gif is my own, using my art of Charlie Weasley which you can find on my art blog @artisticwarnug here. If you use please make sure you credit me and my art blog properly, that the ownership is clear as it is my own art and I would hate for it to be unclear that I made it <3 x

You absolutely loved Halloween for a variety of reasons. Being muggleborn you had grown up going tricking treating with your parents, carving pumpkins (badly), watching scary or simply funny movies, eating sweet treats like candy apples, and watching and helping your parents decorate the house. Halloween had been a big thing in your house, in fact considering the rest of your neighbours weren’t particularly interested in Halloween, your house always looked manic in comparison.

Your parents loved Halloween. They made ‘monsters’ out of old costumes, and lights and placed them around the outside of your house. They made it so spooky that some kids didn’t want to trick or treat, but most loved it. So did you. When you finally went to Hogwarts Halloween was just as magic, sure trick or treating wasn’t a thing, nor were scary movies, or traditional pumpkin carving, but Hogwarts was always decorated so delightfully.

Now as an adult with your own house, and your first Halloween in it, all you wanted to do was carve some pumpkins and enjoy the spooky festive spirit. With Charlie of course.

“No, you have to do it the muggle way! Charlie!” You whine. He’s getting ready with his wand to carve his pumpkin with magic and its so terribly frustrating when you wanted to do it the muggle way. “Please...” You put an extra quiver in your lip, knowing that Charlie would immediately put his wand down...which he did.

“I’m sorry, love...we just always do it that way.”

“It’s okay. I can show you.” You know it must be odd, to a pureblood, to not use magic for something like pumpkin carving. Especially when magic makes so many things so much easier and so much simpler.

You hand him a sharpie, and instruct him as the two of you draw out the lines for your pumpkin faces. Yours begins to look like a silly face, two big eyes and sharp but smiling teeth. Charlie’s is predictably an attempt a dragon...or that’s what he said it was...it looked a little bit like a splodge of paint. But, you wouldn’t tell him that.

“What now?”

“Knife.” You hold up a variety of knives, in a variety of different shapes and sizes

“Knife?” You place a knife in his hand and show him on your own pumpkin as you cut the top off of your pumpkin allowing you to reach inside. He’s rather adept with a knife considering pure blood wizards rarely have use for them, often bewitching them rather than actually using them.

“And scoop.” You hand him a spoon and show him how to loosen the insides of the pumpkin. It was probably your least favourite part of pumpkin carving, simply because it took forever and stringy bits of pumpkin got everywhere.

You laugh under your breath as you reach up to pull a bit of pumpkin from his red hair that had sprayed up as he cleaned out his pumpkin messily. “Messy pup.”

He grins at you before diving back into his pumpkin and you’re glad that he’s so invested...you were a little worried he wouldn’t enjoy carving pumpkins. It was a muggle thing after all.

“So our pumpkins are empty, our lines are drawn, now’s the tricky part. Carving. You don’t want to use too big a knife because you might cut too big a piece.” You let Charlie pick up the best carving knife first and watch him as he carefully cuts out his ‘dragon’. There’s something so relaxing about watching Charlie concentrate on something, take his time. It reminds you of school a little bit. The two of you used to just sit quietly together working on essays and projects, you didn’t need to be loud all of the time and things haven’t changed as you grew. Your relationship is great because you can be boisterous and loud, but you can also be calm and quiet too. Its not preformative. You’re loud when you feel like it and quiet when you want to be.

Truth be told, Charlie’s dragon wasn’t quite as bad as you thought it would be. It was somewhat identifiable and it had a little bit of awkward charm.

Your own pumpkin turned out neat and surprisingly clear. Despite your many years of pumpkin carving experience you weren’t always good at it. But that was half the fun, if the pumpkin was a little weird that was just charm right?

The two of you used magic to light the pumpkin, flames that wouldn’t go out and that were relatively safe compared to the muggle candle method, before placing them outside of your front door to welcome any visitors.

The two of you snuggled up under a blanket on the sofa, after pulling bits of pumpkin out of your hair and cleaning the kitchen. Pumpkin got everywhere.

“Thank you for humouring me...I know magic is easier, but...its not quite the same.”

“I enjoyed it.” He presses a kiss to the crown of your head, pulling you closer, “I like sharing these things with you...I like that you share this side of you.”

“Why wouldn’t I? I love you. I trust you. Muggle traditions are part of who I am and I want to share it with you...so we can have our own mixed traditions.” You liked that you could share these things with him, that you could trust him to try muggle things and mingle them in to your own life together.

“I’m definitely up for pumpkins every year, love.” You smile up at him, pressing a kiss to his check before settling back down. You let out a content sigh and snuggle closer.

#reader insert #readerinsert #charlie weasley x reader #charlie weasleyxreader #charlie weasley/reader #charlie weasley / reader #harry potter #harry potter reader insert #I...I actually found the time to write something? What?#Madness

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kimjongdaely · 5 years ago

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The Art of Sin [Chapter 4] [M]

Gang!AU, Racer!AU, Tattoo Artist!AU

Pairing: Chen x Reader

Warnings: Language, violence, sexual situations, vandalism

Summary: He’s an artist. He does it all for the ‘art.’ Tattooing. Racing. Sex. All because he thinks they’re beautiful. There’s no one here that doesn’t know his name, because it’s everywhere. On every graffiti-filled wall, every tattooed skin, every cheer of the crowd. His name is there somewhere, because it’s all his—this world. And when he lays his eyes on you—well, he’s never seen anything more beautiful. And he’s going to make you his masterpiece.

Chapter 1│Chapter 2│Chapter 3 [M]│Chapter 4 [M]│Chapter 5 [M]│ Chapter 6│Chapter 7│Chapter 8 [M]

You blink, groaning at the light that streams in through the curtains. You roll over, snuggling deeper into the sheets, refusing to get up just yet.

You hear a soft chuckle, warm lips that brush your forehead. “Awake yet, princess?”

Your eyes snap open, for a moment being unable to recognize the voice. There’s a gentle smile on Chen’s face, a little amused as he watches the confusion, then realization flash in your eyes.

“I’m awake.” You mumble, feeling suddenly embarrassed, painfully aware of your nudity—and, well, his. There’s no reason to be embarrassed though, you remind yourself.

“I’m going to go shower.” He says, getting up and stretching. You avert your eyes, feeling your cheeks heat. You’re only able to hum a reply before he heads into the bathroom, the sound of water running seconds later.

You push yourself up, locating your discarded clothes and putting them back on. You try your hardest to comb through your messy hair, waiting for Chen to come out so you can use the bathroom next. You pause, staring at yourself in the mirror over the bedside table, seeing your disheveled appearance and the dark hickeys that litter your neck. Looking down the neck of your shirt, you find that your chest and stomach are equally covered in hickeys.

Oh god, this is so embarrassing. You hug yourself, shivering as you remember what happened. You don’t even know what happened. You were never the type to do one-night stands, never the type to sleep with a guy you literally just met.

And yet here you are. You’re not sure if the churning feeling in your stomach is regret. It’s hard to pinpoint what you’re feeling at the moment.

The shower stops. You feel your heart pound as you listen to soft shuffling through the bathroom door, and moments later Chen comes out with a towel wrapped loosely around his waist, steam rolling out.

You quickly look away again, a conditioned reflex. He chuckles, ruffling the water out of his hair. “What’s wrong? You saw me last night, didn’t you?”

You feel so fucking warm right now, and you kind of want to jump out the window. “Y-Yeah...sorry, I don’t usually do this so I’m a little...shy? I guess?”

He laughs again, pushing the wet hair out of his face and holy shit how does someone look so good— “You sure weren’t shy when you were begging me to fu—”

“Okay! Yes!” You shoot up, yelling to cover his words, embarrassed and annoyed of his teasing. “You were quite the jerk yesterday, by the way.”

He saunters over, pulling your chin towards him, letting you see his shit-eating grin. “Sorry, you were so cute that it made me want to bully you.”

His warm breath fans over your cheek, and he smells amazing. Like vanilla and warm fires, a comforting scent that makes your body relax and tense at the same time.

You shiver at the warmth radiating off him, and you want to get closer, want him to hold you but you’re definitely not going to be that girl. Even if you did sleep with him.

He smirks, cocking his head teasingly at you before pulling away. He grabs his shirt from the floor, pulling it on. “By the way, where do you wanna go?”

“Go?” You repeat, confused. You try not to look at him as he wears his pants.

“For our date.” He answers, finally fully dressed. “You said you would go on one with me last night.”

You blink, puzzled. You have no recollection of such conversation whatsoever.

“Well, I’m not letting you back out now.” There are so many secrets hidden in his smile. Your mind blanks, unable to comprehend the situation you’re in.

“I don’t mind going on a date.” You start slowly, “But why me?”

He scoffs. “Are you really asking me that after last night?”

“My question still stands.”

He pushes the hair out of his eyes again, since they keep falling back down. He huffs, “It’s because I think you’re beautiful.”

You raise a brow at him. “Why thank you. But you’re pretty shallow, aren’t you?”

“I am.” He answers without any hesitation whatsoever. “I am very shallow, actually. So?”

You blink at him, letting his words seep in. You can’t help but burst out laughing at his bluntness. Well, at least he’s very honest. “Alright. Meet me at the aquarium at nine. You have my number, right?”

He cocks his head oddly at you. “Why? Can’t we just go together now?”

“No way. I’m going home first.” You tell him.

He still looks confused. “Why bother?”

You poke the gap between his brows like you would to a child, wagging her finger. “It’s a date, right? I can’t be going in these dirty clothes.”

“Dirty.” He laughs, earning a good smack on the head.

The aquarium is bustling with people. Not surprising, since it’s Saturday. You feel refreshed after a nice hot shower. You’re glad you chose the aquarium off the top of your head, because you’re sure you’d melt under the sun if you chose something outdoors.

Chen is ten minutes early, which is a surprise. You expected him to be late or something (he just seemed like the type of douchebag), but no. He looks good, hair swiped up and changed into a loose, flowery shirt that you’re pretty sure only he can pull off, and black leather pants. He looks like he actually made an effort, and that makes you smile.

“Hey,” he greets, a grin on his face as he sweeps your look. “You look nice.”

You flush, “Thanks.”

It feels weird to be on a date with him like this. Everything about this is weird, since you’ve completely switched up the steps. Shouldn’t people normally go on at least a few dates first before they sleep together?

You peak at him from under your lashes, watching him smile charmingly at the worker behind the counter of the ticket booth. You hardly know him at all, to be honest. Just his first name and occupation.

He gets the tickets, and you head towards the entrance of the aquarium, letting the cool air hit your face. Waiting in line was absolute torture in this crazy heat.

You love the coolness of the aquarium—not just in the sense of their great air-conditioning. You love the shades of blues you see everywhere, the calm atmosphere as you stare at the sea creatures swimming about. Everything here seems like it might stop time, and you can spend days just sitting here staring at the tanks.

If only there weren’t so many darn people today.

“They always start with shallow water before they go into the ocean, right?” Chen asks, glancing at the long line of people hogging the sides of the fish tanks. “I wanna see the sharks.”

You roll your eyes, smiling. “Of course you do.” Somehow you knew he would say that before he did. Like you know him better than you really do.

“Then let’s breeze through this section.” He says, grinning like a child would on a field day. Which, you suppose, is an accurate depiction of what’s happening. He grabs your hand, lacing your fingers. “Wouldn’t want to get separated.”

It feels odd holding his hand like this, but not unpleasant. Though you’ve slept with him, this is the first time you felt anything that remotely resembles being a couple.

You shake that thought away. You’re on your first date. He might not even want to pursue anything after this. You shouldn’t get your hopes up or dream up silly things.

You grab some snacks as a quick lunch before you go further.

Like he said, you scanned the tanks near the beginning—they didn’t seem all that interesting and you sure as hell didn’t have the patience to wait for all the people to get their fill before moving on.

You head through the tunnel, seeing the sharks and other colorful fish swimming up ahead, a scuba-diver waving at the guests as he feeds them. As you near the Open Ocean exhibit, the lights get dimmer to resemble the real habitat, and somehow it seems less people loiter around here.

You and Chen sit down in front of the giant tank, just watching the fishes. This is calm and quiet and you sometimes wish you could bring a book and just sit here until they close.

But that would be a boring date, so you offer to leave.

“It’s okay.” He answers, staring at the fish. “I wanna stay in the air-condition for a little longer.”

His answer surprises you a little, but it makes you happy. Like he feels the same way.

How wonderful would that be?

After dinner, Chen sends you home like a gentleman. The whole day has been surprisingly chill; uneventful, even. It’s just a date like any other, and though you had a lot of fun and really enjoyed his sarcasm and wit (as well as countless fish jokes), you can’t help the strange nagging feeling in the pit of your stomach.

You were also pretty skeptical about letting him send you home. Sure, you slept with him and went on a date with him, but you’re not sure you trust him with your address.

He didn’t exactly push for it either. He was so casual about it, his tone telling you he didn’t really care either way.

Regardless of any hesitation, you let him send you home anyway. You might regret it if he turns out to be a serial killer, but somehow you doubt that.

“Today was fun.” Chen says at your doorway, flashing you a charming smile. “Let’s do it again sometime.”

“Yeah.” You answer, smiling back but it’s a little forced, and apparently he can tell as he blinks at you. He doesn’t comment though, ignoring it completely.

“Good night.” He bids, giving you a small wave before he turns, heading back out.

You don’t know why you did it, or what came over you but you grab his arm, pulling him back. He looks surprised, his brow raised as he stares at you. You gulp, feeling a shiver roll down your spine, hearing alarms blare in your mind but you ignore all of them. “Are you lying to me?”

You’re not even sure what you were trying to do from blurting that out; such a random thing to say, especially after a great first date.

He blinks at you again, his eyes shining with shock and mirth at the same time. He tilts his head at you. “...No?”

Okay, you definitely phrased it weird. You steel yourself, letting go of his hand since he doesn’t seem to be leaving anymore. You look him in the eyes, trying to decipher them, though you find nothing. “Last night you were...different.” You swallow thickly, weighing the words and grabbing for the right ones. “When I was getting my tattoo, during our date, you seemed so...proper. So charming and that...freaks me out, if you know what I mean?”

He gives out a little laugh. “Uh, no? Isn’t that good?”

“It should be.” You answer. “And I would’ve bought it if last night never happened. If we went straight to the date instead of the sex.” You shake your head, your tone slightly accusing but at the same time deathly certain. “You’re faking it, aren’t you? All that prince charming act. Who are you? Why are you hiding yourself from me?”

He stares at you for a second, really staring you down, as if seeing you in a new light, as if he’s trying to decide if you’re friend or foe. It makes you uncomfortable, makes you shift and avert your eyes.

Then he chuckles, a dark chuckle that brings shivers down your spine, that makes goosebumps erupt over your skin. He corners you against the doorframe, making it so that you can’t go in or out. He leans in, a smirk on his lips. “What if I am faking it? So what? Princess, you don’t want to know who I really am. You should just accept what you’re shown. Believe the lies. No one gets hurt that way.”

You shake your head, terrified and curious at the same time, whispering, “But I want to know.”

He chuckles again, breath fanning your cheek before he moves to lean into your ear, his lips grazing the shell and you shake, become putty in his presence. “Trust me. You’re better off not knowing.”

“I’m not scared.” Your voice is tiny though, an evident contradiction. Of course you’re scared. You really are; all the possibilities swimming in your mind but somehow...none of that matters. You want to know. Need to know, almost as if your heart and mind are desperately begging for the truth.

He pauses, contemplating before he breathes out, pulling away. “Alright.” His voice is low, his eyes dark. He smirks as he holds out his hand for you. “Don’t regret it.”

He takes you back to EXO Customs, but holy shit.

This is nothing like you’ve seen before. There are lights flashing, people absolutely everywhere. It’s crazy loud, music booming along with people’s cheers. Through gabs between the people, you see beautiful race cars lined up, people making bets and drinking alcohol.

“W-What’s going on?” You ask, a little terrified of the wild atmosphere, sticking a little closer to Chen.

“A race.” He answers. “We often get challenges and get into races. Happens most weekends. It can get pretty intense.”

“And you...?” You ask, staring at him.

“I race, yeah.” He shrugs. “Sometimes, not always. Only when they need a spot filled or when things seem fun for me.” He points at a glossy black BMW, red streaks of flames painted on, seemingly glowing under the flashing lights. “I painted that beauty. Not too bad, eh?”

“Wait.” You feel dizzy, the lights and colors flashing through your vision. You feel like you’re suffocating, being in this crowd. “You race? You spray paint cars? This race, is it—”

“It’s illegal.” He answers. “We do illegal racing. Drug dealing. Part dealing. Whatever.”

You feel a little sick, unable to believe what you’re witnessing. Illegal stuff. You’ve never touched anything illegal before—always heard rumors and gossip and always rolled your eyes at them. You were never one to go down such a path, to mingle with such people and yet here you are.

“What’s wrong, princess?” He leans down, whispering hotly in your ear so you can hear him above the booming music. “Regretting already?”

You swallow, wanting to admit that, yes, you do regret knowing. He was right. God, he was right about staying away. Believing the lies. You could’ve stayed ‘good.’

But it’s too late. Deep down you know that.

He laughs, voice mixing in with the crowd and he tugs you away, leading you to the garage. “This way.”

He pulls you in, and it’s dark. There’s a pungent smell of gasoline, metal and sweat. Lights reflect off the walls, but it surprisingly drowns out most of the sound, though you can still feel the thumping in the ground, can still hear them in the distance.

“Now you know.” He opens his arms, spinning slowly in a circle as if to show you all of him in its entirety. The illegal racer. Member of a goddamn gang. You should’ve known better. “So,” he breathes out. “Who am I?”

“I don’t know.” You answer honestly. “I think I still need to figure that one out.”

Amused, he laughs. “I’m really liking you.” He corners you against the nose of a car, an abrupt motion that has you fall back, half sitting on the hood. The coolness of the metal makes you flinch.

“Chen?” You’re a little scared when you call his name, but he merely smiles at you.

“Hey, now you know who I am.” He says. “I don’t have to hold back anymore, right?” His lips find their place on your neck, adding more hickeys to your collection of them. You wonder if he’ll ever let them fade entirely before he adds more.

You moan, and he helps you sit more properly on the hood of the poor car. His scorching hands trail up your legs, and you’re already feeling weak.

“They probably can’t hear you,” he murmurs against your skin, already slick with sweat, “but just in case, can you keep quiet, princess?”

You nod your head, lifting your hips so he can pull down your shorts along with your underwear. You grab his shoulders to steel yourself, holding in a gasp when he slips a finger into you.

“Already wet?” He asks, tutting. “My, you’re even more eager than me.”

He fingers you slowly, and you wonder if he’ll do the same as last time, denying you your orgasm. Still, you obediently keep quiet, digging your nails into his shoulders as you try your hardest not to give in so quickly, not to let your hips move on their own.

He chuckles, seeing the effort you’re putting in. He puts in another finger, curling them and aiming straight for your sweet spot. You see black spots at the ecstasy, heaving as you desperately try to keep in your scream. Your eyes roll back as he hits that spot continuously, gaining in speed. Just from finding it once, it seems he’s already able to recognize where your sweet spot is.

He drags his thumb over your clit, rubbing it profusely, abusing it and you throw your head back, rolling your hips into his hand so desperately as you feel the knot begin to build.

“Chen, please.” You rasp, already unable to control yourself as you move more hurriedly. “Faster. I-I’m going to cum.”

“Cum.” He growls, fingering you even faster, adding a third finger and you almost scream, if he didn’t cover your mouth with his other hand. “Cum for me, princess.”

The sounds and colors explode as you hit your high, body arching, head thrashing as you have no other outlet. His fingers pull out, dripping wet and you flush, so embarrassed of what you’ve done in a public place. He licks his fingers clean, laughing quietly. “Damn, that was hot.”

“Shut up!” You hiss, pulling your pants back on and hopping off—hating the wet, sticking feeling—immensely horrified that you let him do such a thing. “What if someone came in? What if—”

“Chen, you in there?” A deep voice comes, and you cover your mouth to stop the absolutely appalled gasp, glaring at Chen who merely shrugs.

“Yeah,” he answers as a tall form enters. The lights come on, and you blink at the sudden brightness. “Did you finish brooding?”

You recognize the man, his icy white hair. You’ve seen him working on cars when you came for a tattoo. He scowls, a dark expression as he glares at Chen. “Shut up, asshole.” He sees you then, his expression changing immediately into surprise. “Hey, you finally got laid?”

“Yeah,” Chen grins, a cheeky grin filled with mischief as he grabs your hand, pulling you quickly out the garage. He calls back, “Sorry, Yeol!”

What a crude way of saying it. You wonder if you’re just that to him. But you don’t have the time to get angry as you wonder why he apologized before you remember what you had done. On what you assume to be one of Yeol’s cars.

Oh.

Shit.

“CHEN YOU FUCKING DISGUSTING SON OF A BITCH! I’M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!”

Chen merely laughs, and you can’t help but follow.

Previous Chapter [M]│Next Chapter [M]

The Art of Sin Mini Masterlist

EXO Customs Collab Masterlist

A/N: I did most of this in one sitting. I’m patting myself on the back. I hope you guys are enjoying this fic so far, because I really am! And I’m excited for what’s to come~

Tags: @ninibears-erigom @baekwell--tart @fairyyeols @suhoerections @kpop---scenarios @skjdln @yeoldontknow @kyungseokie @loser-dot-com @writingstuffandmore @enchanting-exo @vivianhuynh77 @dear-fake-diary @weirdsofagirls @wongxiexie @lovebuginlove @noonaofjungkook @thesoondongiefiles @joolsreadsfics @bluepsycopanda @sebootyforlife

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scooperkin · 6 years ago

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I've seen someone draw the puppet with muscles (I have the picture on my phone)

Sorry I got a bit carried away with my insight on this and the fnaf characters, style and designs in the form of horror media so it’s long and under readmore

Forgive me for any writing errors, this was written on impulse and I probably won’t look into fleshing it out:

I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with art or portrayals of the Puppet with more human-based anatomy features but it’s tiring to see this non-stereotypical gendered entity/child’s toy that isn’t supposed to be presented as anything near human both for the in-universe creative of the children’s imaginations, but also as a horror character that is importantly keep vague because a as a horror character, the unknown of what it could be and it’s odd undefined behavior coupled with this vague humanoid but, UNhuman frame makes it scary to in-universe adults, as well as real fans.

So seeing it so commonly characterized as a shapely-human just ruins the original intent and just takes away my interest in whatever story or fanart is being presented to me. And while this is a personal opinion and really doesn’t matter in what content people should do as if it disinterests me I’ll move on but those who enjoy it will still enjoy it. And there also fan content I’ll still occasionally remain interested that present not just the Puppet but other fnaf characters in campier and, stylistic content; any more serious, spooky, horror or more faithful fan media that has both the Puppet and other FNAF characters portrayed more comfortably artistic light, such as the Puppet having a “motherly” body shape (most likely thanks to Living Tombstone’s FNAF 2 song), as well as Toy Chica’s already feminine body pushed further with more defined features about her body (*ahem* boobies). And notice again how a lot of this is more aimed at the more “feminine” of the cast.

Circus Baby, along with Ballora, are the only animatronics that ends up being drawn straight up as organic entities even when in the presence of their fellow Funtimes, still depicted as their more horrific, robot designs. It’s fine if they’re drawn as regular furries and Baby and Ballora as human women (or little girl), its a chosen style someone chose, and again this isn’t wrong just because I don’t find it interesting enough, it’s not my cup of tea and I move on. But, several times I’ve come to accounter, more organically designed characters often are reduced to basic human features in their design. The Puppet gets curvy, Ballora and Baby get real hair that fluffies and moves organically, Baby herself often made into a tiny cute friendly young girl. The (fixed) Mangle, and Funtime Foxy getting more curves and floof. And don’t even get me started on people who sexualize these characters to the point they’re just human bodies with cartoon heads to just be more comfortable with consuming not safe for work content of them, proving as well these character’s designs, in the long run, don’t matter in this nsfw work, but that’s a different subject on a different type of content for a different day. (And notice how all these characters are feminine? While Scrap Baby can be portrayed as a cute girl in fan content but Molten Freddy is still what he is in the game in his fan content.)

Circus Baby is highlighted by the fact she is a massive robot towering over even the tallest of men, a single eye of her’s can fit two if not four pairs of human eyes in it’s size. Her fingers, thicker than most children’s arms. Is TERRIFYING. And she’s supposed to be. She’s a horror game character. Her scale towers over adults, their parents, the protectors of their children. Her movements are jerky and uncanny, her stare to an older audience member or child can give them the creeps. But ultimately her design–safe, safe for children to run up to, and safe for a child to trust. While her existence and design as a whole in-universe and above the surface is so supposed to be a large child, an older sister, still young enough to play with you but old enough to trust to be alone with. But behind the stage, back underground, that’s not who she really is. I’ve never seen Circus Baby as a giant child as she is seen to the outside world, no because underground, in the darkness she’s kept, we’re shown the real her, the true her. She isn’t some dumb playful child, she is a discerning actor. And her “real” mental age can be debated and discussed among fans, but it’s clear she isn’t an arrogant child. And more specifically for me, I see her depicted as an actress. An actress who’s been conformed to take on this child role both on and off stage. She purposely has a voice higher, she purposely choices her innocent-word structuring. She’s acting, she’s Pretending for the sake of her own safety against this Location she’s in. When even being off character for a moment such as taking a rest off your stage gives you a painful shock. It’s not too unusual as several stars and actors, usually young and more impressionable ones are told to act a certain way even with off-screen. A good example of this is several child stars on the work of Disney Channel original series. They tell their actresses to dress a certain way, to speak in a higher voice, don’t be serious, always smile. Because it earns the trust and love from children viewers better than just, Bella Thorne or Miley Cyrus being her honest self off set to their younger fans. Too risky, keep your voice pitched up. And even though you’re 19 please, please don’t act like it, act younger, the kids won’t ever relate to you if you sound too old, if you act to old. So while Baby and the other Funtimes’ situation is a very exaggerated version of this (no don’t worry no disney stars are getting shocked when they don’t act hard enough) to the point that it’s a horror genre story about it makes sense why this is unsettling as a player and in the Funtimes’ shoes.

So while Baby does everything to keep pretending, this is something Ballora can’t do. Ballora can’t pretend, she refuses. She refuses to pretend when under the surface away from the crowds and people, where she’s alone and can be herself. But she doesn’t get that, she gets shocked and ends up being scooped to “fix” her. Too much free will. Foxy isn’t explored as much but I feel goes through the same trouble as Ballora. And the only one who is seemingly left unpunished is Funtime Freddy, not even getting his own room, just stored somewhere until it’s time for a show. It’s implied he’s either the least sentient out of the cast or the one who acts closest to his original programmed personality. But either reason leaves him unpunished, not locked away for safety and disobedience. He’s unpunished but left alone in a single storage room. But whoops maybe having him follow his programming better than the others wasn’t the best idea. As he gets confused to when he’s on or off stage, when he should be sleeping, forgetting this hug is too tight for a child, or that said child is actually an employee that happened to go into the Breaker Room and is in fact not a birthday boy.

So Baby is unsettling both by design, in context, as well as her history, being created by the infamous William Afton making her again, do things she didn’t want to. So when I see her turned down into cutesy little teen girl or small child, and portrayed as such, I can’t help but again lose interest. And once again this is more of a personal preference, that isn’t how I understood Baby to be, or that she needed to be fixed from a large scary robot to cutesy bab. But it’s how others want it and I step away.

And I know this sounds like I’m going everywhere with this, and barely has to do with your ask, but I fear my post may have been mistaken as I feel this ask is talking about a way people shouldn’t draw or portray the Puppet when I wasn’t trying to say and I’m sorry if it came across that way.

As it stands a muscular portrayal of the Puppet is harmless, and a rarity in re-contributing fan media when compared to the more favored “curvy” puppet design trend. And of course these portrayals are no big deals in the end, and it’s just a preference but, I see more and more young artists following these trends because they seem more normalized. And no it’s not the original artists, of the young artist’s lack of understanding but, the fact that a lot of the fnaf fandom doesn’t treat fnaf like the horror media it is. Which is fine on it’s own, but when it’s brought up, I can’t help but look at a large side of fans like I’m looking at a Happy Tree Friends AMV with a song like this. Yeah Happy Tree Friends is a disturbing creation on it’s own but it’s not because it’s done in seriousness and the fact it’s cutesy IS what makes it disturbing, not any relevance it has to a subject or stories its trying to tell. So paired with a song as intestine and serious in tone as this one just seems…. silly. The editor wanted it to be horrific and scary but with the content at hand… it’s nearly impossible to do and takes a lot of figuring out to make work and only a few horror media can pull it off. And once again maybe this is just a me problem and how I intake content, for me FNAF is a horror story, a tragedy, it keeps you up at night not because the fiction itself is scary, but the contents implied and the contents hinted. Freddy Krueger was a sadistic child murderer in life because it was the evilest and scariest human conduct he could think of. And it’s why it’s so disturbing in FNAF that this ominous purple figure for the first few games was clouded in mystery and terrifying because while Krueger he killed innocent children, the purple figure was scarier over the fact he worked with these children, and he might still have worked with said children and he was Never caught and we didn’t even know his name back then. But we, the player saw him. Then we’re given just his vague actions of not only killing innocent children for no rhyme or reason (and any reasons at the time being just as horrifying )he then“Stuffed the victims in the animatronics” makes you think about how utterly disturbing that is. How did he even manage to do that, how did they not find him, that’s so horrible? And if the Puppet did that, why? The Puppet is vaguely sympathetic or is it? Because why would it do something so disturbing and as horrible as stuffing children into metal suits to the point their blood and organs leaked out, even in the name of “saving” them. It’s still horrible! It’s still tragic!

So when I see attempts at acknowledging in the horror in FNAF I want to give reminders that despite everything, Baby was HORRIFYINGLY big, looked had a cuteness that leaves people with the uncanny feeling of a porcelain doll’s stare. (as well as Ballora’s horrific treats being based off that).

That the Puppet despite everything it’s not a human, and has never been shown to bend in the same way a human can, and when it does move its arms and legs are still stretched out in space as it jumps in to kill you.

And to keep aspects like this when creating fan horror content or original horror content. The simplest of choices are usually the best ones, the feeling of being unable to move while your vague unknown attacker's inch closer and closer, to walk blindly in the dark with dangerous creatures. And in the end of this scary tragedy, or wanting things to be happy again, trying to solve the mystery, trying to make the horrible less horrible, only death awaited. For all of us.

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wonder-fx · 7 years ago

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Top 5 books you read this year

eek i haven’t read many books this year (a total of 11 and most of them were boring art history books for my studies) BUT i will do my best

1) the book of night women by marlon james: i actually picked this book up because of you! i read a few of your posts and i was inspired to check it out when i saw it displayed in my local library. a devastating book but it was so good. to be honest, i don’t think i’ve ever read something set in the caribbean or by a jamaican author. after reading this book, i want to read more! actually, this book partially inspired me to take another caribbean architecture/landscape studies course this past semester. so thank you! this book brought on a lot of good stuff in my life and it wouldn’t have been on my radar without your posts!

2) human acts by han kang: another devastating book that made me cry a lot and i brought it with me on vacation, what a silly decision on my part. i don’t tend to like books that change narrators often but this worked. i also read the vegetarian this year and i have so many thoughts on that book. it was so gruesome but i related (too much) to it. however, human acts has a lot of interesting themes too, the duality of humans as brutal and kind creatures especially struck me when i read this over the summer. i enjoyed our few conversations about han kang :)

3) the bear and the nightingale by katherine arden: my friend does not read contemporary fiction, especially fantasy, so when she recommended this to me, i had high expectations. it didn’t meet all of those expectations, it had a very rushed ending, however, i really enjoyed myself. i haven’t read a fantasy book in a long time. ive been mostly reading magical realism but it obviously isn’t the same. and it’s set in russia and incorporates russian fairy tales and mythology!! that was refreshing to me. i have the second book on hold :)

4) depositions: scenes from the late medieval church and the modern museum by amy powell: this is a book i had to read for class and i don’t recommend it to people who aren’t interested in medieval art, modern art or museum studies. when i first read it, i didn’t enjoy it to much but the lecture in class really blew my mind. like, this lady is calling for a complete overhaul of the western museum tradition and calling western art dead and i am here for this!!!!!!

5) the woman in the dunes by kobo abe: i would not call this a favorite or even great but i consider it a top book of the year. i’ve been infatuated with japanese literature for a long time and this book kind of snapped me out of it in a good way. what are considered classics might not be good. (to go by the words of freckle, sometimes…things that are considered a classic….. are worse). who are the people calling this a classic? it made me think of why i was reading certain books. i was reading kobo abe because i was told to by other people who read japanese literature. however, although this book is well written, this book is also terrifying and SO misogynistic i felt sick reading it on the train. never again will i read something because it’s a ~classic~

now that i am free from the toxic, soul-sucking institution that is academia, i have time for fun reading again *cries* at the moment, i’m reading little fires everywhere by celeste ng. i’m half way done but not confident enough to include it in top 5 just yet. it’s pretty good so far!!

send my my top 5 anything~

#asks #anaustenheroine

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jyushimatsu-falls-in-love · 7 years ago

Text

s2ep12: ooh, i wanna be like yo-o-ou~

I wanna walk like you, talk like you, too~ You'll see it's true, someone like me can learn to be like someone like you~! - “I Wanna Be Like You” from Disney’s The Jungle Book, which kinda suits this week’s main skit :P

[SPOILERS UNDER THE CUT!]

Not gonna lie, when the previews for this week’s ep. were released I grew very concerned. Mostly it’s because of the little boy in the preview, Eitaro - I, and a lot of other people, was thinking that he kinda-sorta-really looked like a certain homerun girl. And then theories were going around, especially one that she was the little boy’s mom... So I got myself a little really worried haha ^^;

But as it turns out, I had no reason to worry at all orz And I actually really enjoyed this episode, especially little Eitaro’s skit! But we’ll talk about him and his family later.

Let’s start first with the first skit, which is yet another entry in the Totoko-and-Nyaa-(with-Chibita) series. It actually comes in right before the OP! So in this one, Totoko and Nyaa are at Chibita’s stall once again. Totoko is rather troubled, and she makes a big deal out of it, irritating Nyaa. But after some brief contradictory behavior on Totoko’s, we find out what’s bugging her: She wants to... quit being an idol?! Nyaa is shocked - and is actually willing to listen to Totoko’s reasons and maybe help her out! This sudden friendliness and willingness to work out their issues scares Chibita. And I don’t blame him, lol :P To be continued!

(Also, Chibita grew his single strand of hair back! I guess Totoko’s “you’re cuter bald!” flattery from last week didn’t stick much lol. But it’s nice to see his hair again.)

After that comes “The Eitaro Family”, a really cute and silly skit for the most part. We open with Jyushi playing with a little boy with Eitaro in the playground. Eitaro is the most adorable thing, a happy and energetic grade school boy who thinks every silly thing Jyushi does - from burrowing into the ground to extreme biking to dressing as a bird - is awesome! He wants to be just like Jyushimatsu, and Jyushi can’t help but feel flattered and play along. Call him Master (and you’ll get a candy if you do)!

While Jyushi and Eitaro are hanging out, Ichi and Totty spy on them. Apparently Eitaro really, really looks up to Jyushimatsu, and hangs out with him a lot to the point of waiting outside the Matsus’ house every day just to hang out and play. Ichi and Totty think the kid’s looking up to Jyushi for all the wrong reasons; and, well, considering that it’s Jyushi, it might not be too far-fetched to worry about that. (Though to be fair, any child looking up to a Matsuno is probably looking up to them for the wrong reasons too :P)

Jyushi and Eitaro’s friendship is the cutest thing, like oh my goodness ;w; Jyushi clearly enjoys Eitaro looking up to him, and he really tries to make himself look good in the eyes of his little friend. To the point that he’ll even lie about what a NEET is (”It’s a baseball position!”) and what a cherry boy is (”I really like cherries!”) just so that Eitaro would still keep thinking he’s cool haha :P So I guess even Jyushi gets self-conscious! But not entirely, I suppose - he still shamelessly shares the Final Fart Rush technique to his little disciple. And yeah, it’s just as stinky as it sounds :’P But Eitaro finds it super cool!! (And surprisingly enough, while it was still gross, the fart joke didn’t really bother me as previous toilet humor jokes in the last few episodes did. Not quite sure why...)

A week passes, and suddenly Jyushi finds himself in Eitaro’s house, sitting face to face with his mother - who isn’t Homura btw, but is instead an older-looking woman with short hair and a low and really familiar-sounding voice. (No seriously, I feel like I’ve heard Eitaro’s Mom’s VA somewhere else before! But where...?) Eitaro’s been imitating Jyushi lately, and his mom is understandably concerned about who her son’s hanging out with, so she asks Jyushi some questions. Throughout the whole thing Jyushi is very, very self-conscious and embarrassed about some of the questions; and little Eitaro, earnest and excited about his “master” as he is, isn’t really helping Jyushi much lol (“EI-TA-RO-KUN!”)

It’s interesting seeing Jyushi in a place where he's embarrassed of what he’d normally be like, and is instead trying to make himself look presentable. One would think that he wouldn’t care about these sort of things, but he does... I think that really adds to his character and makes him a lot more multi-faceted. It’s interesting. (And so every single Matsu - except maybe for Oso??? - cares about what other people think of him...)

It then culminates to Jyushi ending up having to demonstrate his Final Fart Rush technique for Eitaro’s Mom. We don’t see the gag itself, but we do see the aftermath - Jyushi’s face got beat up pretty badly, to which Eitaro’s Mom apologizes for. She isn’t really mad at Jyushi though, and instead she wants to ask him a favor.

That favor, as it turns out when Jyushi talks to Ichi and Totty about it, is that Eitaro’s Mom wants Jyushi to spend more time with her son and be his friend. Since Eitaro’s dad’s job makes the family move around a lot, the poor kid never really gets to make any friends; so prior to meeting Jyushi, he was a sad and lonely child. What is it with Jyushi befriending sad brown-haired people and helping them cheer up? This is the second time it’s happened, though the context is worlds different from the previous instance :P Anyway, that being said, Ichi and Totty think - and Jyushi agrees - that what Eitaro really needs is to make friends his age in school, not just depend on Jyushi for friendship all the time.

This is an Otoutomatsu skit!! This is an Otoutomatsu skit and I’m super happy that it is :’D While Ichi and Totty aren’t exactly supportive-supportive, they’re there for their brother when he needs to talk to them and they give pretty decent advice. I love love love the Otoutomatsu combo and I’m very happy to see the three of them (and just the three of them, sorry niichans :P) interacting.

So with that, Jyushi resolves to teach Eitaro even more of his gags and antics. (Including others’ gags and antics... Jyushi, the SHEEH is Iyami’s, not yours, even your own brothers point that out :’P) Surprisingly enough, Eitaro’s Mom goes along with it, and she’s very supportive of her son and his teacher. She even made Eitaro his own yellow Jyushi parka!! Ichi and Totty, on the other hand, are decidedly more tsukkomi about it :P Still, all four adults are there outside the school building when Eitaro shows off his newly-learned gags and antics to his classmates...

...and it turns out to work!! Eitaro has made friends with everyone in his class by the end of the day, and it’s all thanks to Master Jyushi teaching him the ways. Eitaro’s Mom is proud of her son, and Jyushi especially is proud of his little disciple! It’s the cutest, sweetest thing ever!!

...until Eitaro reveals that his newfound gag talents also landed him a girlfriend. Cue Jyushi expelling him from his tutelage and flinging the boy and his mini-Kanojochan into the sky :P ...And instead of getting mad, Eitaro’s Mom finds that awesome and begs Jyushi to be her master too. Jyushi refuses. It won’t stop her from waiting outside the Matsus’ house in a Jyushi parka though. Poor Ichi and Totty :P

So this skit wasn’t what I expected at all, and I’m happy! Aside from the fact that JyushiHomu wasn’t sunk (:P), we got Jyushi having an adorable friendship with an equally adorable little boy, more of his self-conscious side, 110matsu, Otoutomatsu, and a lot lot more!! This skit is very worth it and you should definitely watch it ;v;

After that, we have “Give Them Back”. It’s a Dekapan and Dayon skit. Dekapan’s bored one day, so Dayon has the perfect solution - he rips off Dekapan’s pants. He then has Dekapan chase after him and his pants all over the lab, which makes the old man quite happy again... at first. But then Dayon takes the pants with him and runs everywhere else, forcing Dekapan to run after him completely naked. And the skit is just that, really - Dekapan giving Dayon chase all while yelling at him to give his pants back.

To be honest, there really isn’t much to say about this one, because the premise pretty much stays the same all throughout. But that doesn’t mean I didn’t enjoy it! Some notable moments in the skit come to mind:

While running, Dayon and Dekapan come across the other characters, and the two prove to be quite the nuisances :P There’s Totoko and Hatabou, where Totoko becomes scared for her life after seeing the “pervert” Dekapan be completely naked; there’s Oso and Ichi, who lost at pachinko and ended up being spun around by Dekapan and Dayon’s chase; there’s Jyushi and Eitaro, with the latter begging Jyushi to be his master again before they too get spun around by the chase; there’s Kara and Choro at the fishing hole, who end up getting tangled in their fishing lines as a result of Dekapan and Dayon running around them; there’s an Iyami cameo in the escalators of a shopping mall. Tbh the cameos make one of the most memorable parts of this skit

At one point, Dekapan gets tired of the chase and cross at Dayon for all his shenanigans. Dayon tries to get Dekapan to chase him again, waving the old man’s pants in front of him - but Dekapan dramatically gives Dayon the cold shoulder, swatting the pants away and walking away into the sunset. This part was played so seriously and dramatically that it made me laugh. Eeyup.

Near the end of the skit there’s suddenly an art shift into a pixel RPG style. And then an acid trip style. Of all skits to go into art shift, why this one

And it ends with Dayon still running with the pants, and Dekapan yelling at him to give them back, he’s not ever gonna forgive him for this, etc. Dekayon is becoming intense, guys :P

Then finally, we have the last Totoko & Nyaa skit. It looks like Totoko has bared her whole problems to Nyaa, who seems to be listening and sympathizing, so at first it seems to be going well...

...but then Nyaa goes and throws boiling hot konjac on Totoko’s face :P Totoko retaliates by throwing hot daikon slices onto Nyaa’s eyes. Another fight ensues, complete with wrestling tackles and suplexes, and it ends up destroying Chibita’s stall all together. The skit ends with Totoko and Nyaa name-calling and beating each other up, all while Chibita stares ahead... And his regrown stand of hair flies away with the wind, proving it to be fake all along. Ososan’s sense of continuity never fails to amuse me :P

So this week’s ep is a fun one! It’s not the best of the episodes we’ve got so far, but I enjoyed almost every minute of it. “The Eitaro Family” is the crowning jewel of this episode. Hooray for Jyushimatsu and his adorable friendship with Eitaro!! While I think he and his mom would just be oneshot characters, it’d be nice to see them again later down the line. (Also now I want Eitaro to show up in JyushiHomu fanworks ;v; Let Homura and Eitaro interact; I bet she’d love the little guy ♥) (Also I think Dekapan and Dayon might need some couples counselling lol Dayon’s becoming increasingly shadier in this season and I dunno what’s up with that) All in all, thank you for this episode, base-stealing home run!

There’s been some discussion earlier in the stream on whether or not we’ll be having an episode next week. Christmas day falls on a Monday, but I don’t really think it’s considered a day-off day in Japan. According to my research, Christmas Eve is more celebrated there than Christmas day. That being said, there was a tweet made by the official Ososan Twitter account about Christmas some time ago... People are saying it’s about a delay or something. I dunno, we’ll have to see I guess.

Whether or not we’re getting a new episode next week though, we are getting a new episode! And it’s about New Years! “We still celebrate the end of the year,” Totty says in the voiceover. Is that showing on the last day of the year? Well, it turns out New Year’s Day 2018 also falls on a Monday... Will this be what welcomes us into the New Year? Will this be the last episode of the first cour, or the first episode of the second cour? :0 Hmm. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.

#Spoilers #Matsu spoilers #Matsu S2 spoilers #Season 2 #Random thoughts with Nature #Nature talks about S2 #This week's ep was cute please watch it

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rpedia · 8 years ago

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[Ask RPedia] Post-Long Time RP Shutdown Advice?

Anonymous asked: Hey, do you have any advice for people who have been in roleplays for 1 year+ that have just closed down? Feeling kind of lost & in a funk now I've lost contact with people I was close to & enjoyed writing with. Not sure if this is the right place to come and ask but figured it was worth a shot

Oh no! Another lost lamb. I see this happening a lot, and boy experiencing it was no happiness either. It’s like finishing a good book and having the world slowly fade in. Everything’s different, and empty, it’s horrible. Unfortunately, no matter how long your RP friends have lasted, sooner or later it starts falling apart. It’s always good to have interests and accounts in other places in case of loss like this, because you’re gonna have to build from scratch one way or another, paralleling it with growth takes away some of the ‘waiting’. Let’s talk about some likely ways to handle this though from the beginning!

You can go to somewhere new. Explore! There’s a whole wide web of sites that want to encourage you to roleplay, from forums to chatrooms. I keep a list here that anyone can reply to and add places to check out, and that I add to whenever I move sites. I haven’t for some time actually, because each new fandom I move to, and each new group has been found and expanded on that very large very open site. (Thanks F-list!). When you join a new site, you can usually find someone, somewhere, willing to chat with you. They may not be the kind of partner you want right that second because they aren’t what you’re used to, but talk to them anyways. Work your way to RP for the sake RP with a new person, and you can find people you didn’t realize you’d be so close to, because you simply were busy with people you already were close to! Offer enough chances, and something will pan out.

Try speed dating. Like the sound of quick semi-meaningless RPs to check for Chemistry? Omegle, Cherubplay, MSPARP, even Chatroulette in an emergency. Just set your standards to how you like, make sure you suggest “roleplay” and your fandom name of choice on Chatroulette and Omegle, and then play out random little abstract tidbits about your characters meeting. You can find really interesting people like this, who might be willing to toss a Tumblr handle or Skype handle your way where you can find each other again and start roleplaying in a bigger way. Many of the users on these sites either don’t have a solid constant flow of RP elsewhere (which means they may be open to a tighter bond with someone) or they’re shopping for neat people to share with others. You can build patter, and teach yourself to be more social through these cold start prompts. It’ll force you to drop some habits you’ve gotten used to with other people, and open your mind to new people.

Try going out and doing other things, or finding new fandoms. Oh look, personal growth! You’re free, instead of lost. You’ve got no roots and therefore can meander into anything you find interesting. Something maybe your past partners were tentatively interested in, or not interested at all so you set it aside. Watch a new series, get addicted, get fresh ideas and try new OCs. Do something you’ve never done before, and you’ll find people who were connected to those things the whole time. When you finally get into those things, you’’ meet people you’ve never met. The RP world is basically a giant net, and everyone is connected via interests, threads, and other people. If you put yourself out there on a thread or in a chatroom and just talk about something new, you’ll be visible to new people, and if you share interests and chemistry with these new people... Well the obvious happens. You’ll end up chatting, possibly making friends, and since you both like RP if you stick to RP sites, you might actually get into another group. Just because your group is dead, doesn’t mean there aren’t living ones looking to suck in someone of interest who used to be busy! Don’t be afraid to approach people just to talk, or to work out a plot.

Hang out on Public Chats/Forums. Be yourself, in front of other people! Related to all of my points a little, if you’ve been in a private chat, or a private Skype, a closed tumblr, or a private forum you haven’t had much time to get out and be seen. You’re basically a stranger to the internet. Someone who hid themselves in the ancient caves to practice their art, unseen for centuries before bursting onto the scene. If you become seen, people will check you out. People who may not approach you at first until they get a nice sense of you. If you’re nice to whoever comes to you, no matter their RP quality, you’ll have people who may be really good, but really shy, find you safe. If they find you safe, they’ll approach you, and you can bond with them. If you play long enough in public, you’ll get regulars, and friends. When you have friends and regulars, they may play with each other in public using you as a jumping off point for why they are interacting. You’ll help them greet people they would never meet on their own. As that gets bigger, this Katamari of Roleplay will build and build until you have your own little niche/clique/community within the larger landscape. All this, just by being visible, and good natured/interesting in public, regularly.

Roleplaying wasn’t hard to get into the first time you did it, I have a feeling. Sure it was big and new and a little intimidating, but you didn’t know what to expect. You wanted to learn, interact. You didn’t have any solid ideas of what was going to happen, or memories of people who were fantastic players you were really close to. Your friends mean something, and they always will. But you’re allowed to have more friends. You’re allowed to open up, socially, and try everything as if it’s brand new again.

Let yourself be hesitant, but don’t be afraid to jump in! Jump into everything! Everywhere! Explore your new characters through writing fanfics or short stories. Work on profiles. Design worlds. Design life. Come up with concepts. Play with yourself, by writing by yourself. Maybe in public. Let yourself do crack-play, or bullshit you wouldn’t do because you have a higher standard now. If it’s fun, it’s fantastic! It doesn’t matter what other people think. You’ll find somewhere, as long as you openly invite interaction in your posts. No hanging out in corners sipping tea, no yawning, no sitting by yourself hoping someone will get curious.

Name drop, in narration not vocally for your character unless they know the names. Interact with other posts. Someone do something silly? Laugh about it. React to the people around you. Invite them to react back. Allow them to see you want to play with them. As long as you actively seek out other people, and actions instead of trying to lead everything yourself you’ll end up getting the ball rolling on new RP friendships.

Interest can be anything from playing a character that is unique, to playing a character doing something other people haven’t seen a thousand times which has something that they will notice. Be it sound, visual stimuli, smells, emotions, or even sense of touch. Don’t be obnoxious and grab strangers or attack people out of no where. For the love of god, poking will annoy a lot of people. But maybe, sit down and set up a board game. Roll some dice loudly. Start laughing at something on your cellphone, and look around for someone to share it with. People will jump on open interactions like that. Especially if you make a note you’re looking for someone to do so. Glancing around for help, literally calling out, ‘Hey anyone wanna join me?’ shit like that.

Pretend you’re in public in the real world, in New York. They pretty much ignore things that are wacky and abnormal unless they explicitly involve them in the action. Not by touching, so much because that’s kind of creepy and assault in some cases, but by vocalizing and calling out. “Hey! You!” yelled at the big guy in the corner will get their attention. Emotion and shit, tone of voice. Are you curious, snappish, excited, angry? It brings elements to RP to draw new people in.

And of course, skim their profiles if they have any. OOC sections and ‘likes and dislikes’ and other important ‘Please don’t do this’ things should be known if you are approaching someone new. It takes 15 seconds, and could save you from calling out someone, and demanding a fight, from someone who doesn’t like fight RP. Or who doesn’t want to play anything you find interesting. Everyone’s different, and honestly, it takes a few extra seconds to make things so much easier on everyone else.

I also suggest the tag #RPediaRP for everyone trying to find partners! Look, the tag’s empty right now. But if you use the tag on here, on Omegle, on Twitter, anywhere you can use a tag system? People looking at it because I just advertised it to over 6.5k people, might see you. Say hi! Mention that you’re looking for asks, or replies. Say you’d like to chat about stories. Give a summary of you and your character. See who shows up to the party. #RPediaRP is 100% user generated, not me, but it’ll let people find each other. I get a lot of fucking asks about advertising and finding each other. Using that tag to post open starts, and stuff like that will get that community participation in a smaller area. Ya’ll are good RPers right? GET OUT THERE. GET SEEN!

Advertising a tag to help ya’ll find other RPedia readers who want RP aside, that’s great advice and I’ll repeat it 30 thousand times. Get seen. Make friends. Interact. You got this, it’s all a matter of self advertisement and trying.

Emotionally, I would like to touch upon recovery. You have just experienced a major loss. An RP network is a support network. It’s friendships, and building a world that feels real and unique. Even though it’s fictional, it still has the same value as face-to-face relationships in terms of support, interaction, social ties, and emotion. You still feel love for them, kinship, understanding. You’ve learned their tics, and how they interact with one another. You’ve gotten close to these people, and having those ties severed feels like shit.

Reach out to them, some of them may be feeling the same way and you can continue on your journey with people who already understand you. People who care about you, and don’t want to lose contact. Maybe some of your friends are more healthy by going on their way? But sharing your life with someone you’re used to, and who will remember things can make the loss less sharp. Just don’t hyperfocus on them and force them to be your entire social network, they’ll get tired, resentment will brew. Remember to keep reaching outwards, and never focus all your attention on just one person. It’s unhealthy and ends up making everyone kinda upset in the end.

You still matter, even though you’ve lost things. You’re a person, and roleplaying means something to you. It’s an interest or hobby that can help you grow as a person and really see the world, and meet people. You’ll do things you can never hope to do in real life. So, in a way, roleplay can heal what roleplay has harmed. Don’t abuse it, and make yourself the center of every sad story, but you can hint as losing friends, or missing people and get a little bit of coddling. Here and there, a light dusting of sad spice. It can be cathartic if you’re not heavy handed.

Give yourself time to heal. Rest up, you’ve been through something. It might take you 5 minutes to be fresh as a daisy, or months or years to get over that loss. Everyone’s different. You might go through all the stages of grief, or you might go ‘well.... time to move on’ and find something to distract you entirely. It’s okay, no matter what you choose to do, or well, not choose, but have to experience because your brain is a mean little thing that pushes various chemicals whether you ask it to or not.

You’re going to be fine, experiencing pain and loneliness is normal. It’s normal to feel both loss and grief, and love and sentimental warmth. Look back on it as something amazing, something you loved, and look for new challenges. New purpose, relief, and happiness is in your future. You are not lost for good, you’re just... in-between roleplay partners. You’ll get new ones, the urge to write and tell stories never leaves you entirely.

Good luck, and happiness on your path to finding this shit. Gooey and lovey-dovey as I sound, and as hard as this feels for some of you? You’ll be okay. Everything will be okay.

#roleplaying #roleplay help #finding partners #roleplay partners #RPC #RPH #Ask RPedia #RPedia #RPediaRP #Looking for partners?#Use RPediaRP as your first tag

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itsashleymcdonald19blog-blog · 8 years ago

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6/25/17 x2 (Time change is a mess)

Well this morning was supposed to start off much earlier than it did.. Funny story, last night, when I set an alarm for 5:30 am it was set for weekdays and considering today was not a weekend it didn’t go off. Instead, the alarm that was supposed to warn me 5 minutes before leaving was the alarm that woke me up. Nia and I were so panicked and so rushed and lets just say it is a miracle that we did as much packing as we did last night. Essentially all we had to do was change, and put a few things away. We rushed so fast and got ready with literally 4 minutes to spare before having to be down stairs to catch the bus. Wow, we really could have missed our coach, which would have made us miss our flight, and well I do not even want to think about that. We made it though! Thank god!

We headed to the airport and got to experience true Sydney traffic. People drive crazy here, especially in a big bus. We made it to the airport, got our luggage off the coach and headed into the terminal to check in. Check in was smooth so they we headed to customs. Customs operated the same way that it did in Melbourne. You took your passport, had to put it into this scanner essentially, then it directs you when to move through the gate, and then you have to do whatever you look like in your passport in order to be cleared through to the next checkpoint. Honestly, it is really cool, and helps Border Patrol to have less work. It is extremely effective and it was very impressive. I wonder how long it will take the states to hop on this bandwagon.

Then we went through security, nice and smooth, and then made our way to the gate. We grabbed some breakfast, and just waited until it was time to board the plane. I was and still am dreading this flight. I am genuinely worried about my ears, and i just wish I could be in a place of comfort right now. Even though this flight is 2 hours shorter than when we came here we are now flying in the day so we have to at least try to stay awake for 7 hours of it. You can only sit for so long and watch so many movies, and have no wifi. After this, I will not want to fly for a long while.

I am currently sitting on the plane and I cannot help but to reflect on this entire trip. There have been highs and lows (literally) but overall I do not think I could have asked for a better experience abroad. I have travelled almost 20,000 miles, been to 7 different cities, and conquered a good portion of the continent.

Throughout my time here in Australia I have done some amazing things. I will list a few here:

I have eaten some of the weirdest food I have ever eaten in my life. Seriously everything in Australia is different.

I have drank some of the best coffee at some of the most hole in the wall cafes.

I immersed myself in cafe culture.

I had class at the Melbourne State Victoria Library.

I have gone to many museums (too many museums).

I have found some great rooftop bars.

I wandered in the alley ways of Melbourne to find hidden treasures. (Some of my favorites were Hoiser, Hardware, and Degraves).

I went up to the Eurekya Sky deck which is the tallest building in Melbourne.

We all bonded with Asian Beer Cafe (ABC- also the place that shall not be named)

I rode the Melbourne Star Observatory over the nighttime skyline.

I leaned a lot about the Aboriginal culture through our guides and classes.

I saw wild koalas, wallabies and kangaroos.

I saw thousands of penguins migrate from sea to land at Peter Island.

I shopped at the Queen Victoria Market which is the largest Open Air Market in the Western Hemisphere.

I visited the Shrine of Remembrance and the Melbourne Botanical Gardens

I went and saw a footie game in Melbourne's largest and most famous stadium.

I travelled to St. Kilda beach and Luna Park.

I went to Federation Square many times.

I travelled to Port Douglas where we went to one of the most beautiful beaches, ate some great fish and chips, and had some great gelato.

I was able to feed and pet kangaroos and wallabies, and I got to hold a koala!

I snorkeled on the Great Barrier reef with one of the most legendary people who snorkel on the reef and call it home.

I went to Karaoke night at Iron Bar

I stayed in an ecolodge where I really had to face my fear with bugs. Shout out to all the insects and bugs in our cabin.

I swam in a spring fed creek (and fell).

I watched a movie in the outback under the stars.

I went caving and spelunking.

I explored Aboriginal art in caves and saw some amazing views of the outback.

I watched the sunset at Balancing Rock.

I tent camped in the freakin' outback. (I will never be camping again).

I had to use a freakin' dunny… never will I ever again.

I made friends with a wallaby dog named Menzy.

I was able to see rescued wallabies and their babies on site in my backyard.

I drove in little yellow busses to the Daintree Rainforest.

I went night spotting 2 too many times.

I went jungle surfing in the Daintree Rainforest.

I ate the most unique gelato you can find in the world at Daintree Ice Cream Co.

I did the Mijin swing in Cairns (TWICE).

I made friends with some travel company and ended up getting free drinks and food all nigh at Gilligan's. Along with meeting some girls from Ohio and all over the world.

I watched a ladies night pole dancing competition that really turned into a strip club. (YIKES)

I was able to take a harbor cruise in Sydney to experience Vivid Sydney.

I was able to meet up with Lys to celebrate my birthday in Sydney (2 times)!

I went shopping in the Queen Victoria Building and the shopping district in Sydney.

I was able to go to many clubs and spend many late nights with these amazing people I now call my friends.

I traveled to Bondi and Coogee beach.

I was able to attend the Sydney Film Festival and see the premier of Okja (which everyone should see)

I toured the Sydney Opera House and saw a show called Hot Brown Honey!! (The best show I have ever seen)

I went to St. Mary’s Cathedral.

I visited the Hyde Barracks and Hyde Park.

I climbed the Pylons on the Sydney Harbor Bridge

I went whale watching

I tried Kangaroo.

These are just some of the highlights, I know thats a long list, but that is because there isn’t enough words or time to explain everything I have done this trip or what I have learned.

I have learned a lot about myself throughout this trip. One big thing, as silly as it seems, is how much we take for granted cell service and wifi everywhere. Throughout this trip I did not purchase a phone plan so the only time I could use my phone was when there was wifi. I was unable to use maps to navigate through the city, I was unable to talk to friends and family, and I realized how much I use my phone for things. It was refreshing in a way to “unplug” sort of speak but I also now realize the next time I go to another country at least data will be necessary for navigation.

I also learned that I am not as great with directions as I had originally believed. Typically on family vacations I am the navigator and I have a very good idea of my whereabouts, however, this was not the case here in Australia. I spent most of my time turned around, and dependent on Kayla’s maps. When I finally got it down, it was basically time to leave.

I also realized that I am moderately high maintenance. Prior to this trip, I felt that I was relatively low maintenance but this trip has changed my perspective to moderate. I hate bugs, I hate night spotting, I hate when bugs are in my space, I hate seeing the biggest spiders I have in my life, I am not a camper, I hate dunnies and I really enjoy having comfortable accommodations where I do not share them with bugs. I also realized that I am more picky than I thought. For the meals that were provided, for the most part, I ate them, but others I said “not a chance in hell."

This trip slo has reaffirmed that I love American food. As I have mentioned in previous posts, everything in Australia is different. From bacon, to ham, to “burgers”, to their spices and sauces, even their bagels. It was always interesting ordering something at a restaurant and being completely confused on what it was. For example, one of the weirdest things we realized is that in Australia they called everything a burger versus a sandwich. In the states, a burger implies a beef patty, here a burger doesn’t mean patty unless it specifies there’s a patty. Also, there food is all pretty bland, and they rely heavily on sauces, like aioli. I love aioli so this was okay with me. Long story short, I miss American food, I miss ordering and knowing exactly what I am going to get, and I am excited to not have to constantly google what the food is.

Throughout this trip, I realized I have an extreme gelato obsession (problem). I love gelato and we ate it far too much on this trip. I have no regrets, but jesus I will miss gelato .

This trip has also been extremely eye opening to the fact that in America we really are ignorant to other countries and what is happening in their worlds. In Australia, on their news they have a specific segment dedicated to around the world, the biggest highlight being America. In America, we are so sheltered and unconcerned with the rest of the world and I think that this says a lot about us.

I have learned so much about Australia that I could probably talk for days about their national identity, injustices, Aborigines, their colonization, convict culture, and their so called multiculturalism. Throughout one of my classes we examined if Australia is actually multicultural or not and I am confident to say that I do not believe they are to the extent that they preach that they are. We experienced a lot of racism, discriminatory, and ignorant behaviors and comments while in Australia as well as many cultures are incredibly underrepresented in society.

Prior to these classes, I had no idea that Australia was colonized by convicts, I had no idea about the Aboriginal people, stolen generations, hygienic dorms, or any of the injustices they faced, nor did I really have any knowledge about cinametography, or anything about Australia really. This trip has made me much more knowledge about Australia and has showed me how much more there is to learn about the world and every other country in it.

This trip has also made me more confident in traveling by myself. This was the first time I have ever flown without my parents and I did very well. I was initially very anxious about it but at this point we have flown so much it is a breeze. However, that doesn’t mean that I am consistently going to want to do.

This trip has also introduced me to some amazing people. The girl gang: Nia, Kayla, and Morgan have been the girls since day one and we just have gotten significantly closer. We all got along very well, and we balance each other out well too. Cody was also a part of our group, it was always Cody and the girls and I also enjoyed his company. Coming on this trip I was worried because I really didn’t know anyone besides Cici, but surely enough I made some friendships for a lifetime. We are already planning our first reunion once school starts. I met many other people and made many other friends that I am so happy have come in to my life. It will be awesome to see more familiar faces on each campus.

Now, I have talked about all the good, and clearly it out weighs the bad, but it wouldn’t be fair for me to not even talk about the lows. One thing that really bothered me was that to pretty much every event we were late. For someone who is extremely time oriented, this frustrated me. I also felt like a lot of our accommodations could have been nicer in the middle of our trip (not Sydney or Melbourne). I do not do well with bugs in my bed, or in my shower, or pretty much in my space at all. When I am in nature, I am in their space, but when they are in mine, it is a no go. Also, there was not enough time scheduled in between our activities. A lot of the time we had an hour to eat, go to the other side of the city and find our destination. We also were left constantly to fend for ourselves and find things on our own with no help and most people with no cellular or data. We also had way too much work. I believed, along with everyone else, that the reason we had bootcamp was so that the work would be minimal when we were actually abroad. Nope, that wasn’t the case,and to top it all off we have some brutal final projects to complete once we get back. I do have to keep telling myself that it is 6 honors credits but still, it is freakin’ annoying. I wish we had spent at least one more day in Cairns because I loved that city and there was so much to do and see. Lastly, we went to way too many museums. Some were very enjoyable and informative, but all the art museums weren’t necessary, and a lot ended up repeating the same stuff eventually. B esides, these things, I really have nothing to complain about, My biggest frustration was with all of the school work but I am STUDYING abroad so I guess you just have to deal with it.

Everything that was a low, wasn’t truly a low because it was all part of the experience. This trip has pushed my personal limits, it has exposed me to many things I would never do in my normal life, and it has given me a new found appreciation for basic things like plumbing, wifi, air conditioning,and clean beds and accommodations. As you can see, nothing outweighs the highs of this trip. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Sidenote:

This flight is miserable, we still have 9 hours left and then I have to catch my connecting flight to San Diego. Then my second vacation starts. I am already exhausted, and I am going to be jet lagged so this will be interesting. I am so excited to be reunited with my family, my boyfriend, Zoey, and just normal life again.

Surprisingly, the food was actually pretty good on the way home, much better than on the way here. I am struggling with trying to time my sleep. It is currently 2:15 pm on the 25th and we still have 9 hours of the plane ride left. I will probably attempt to take some medicine soon that will help me pass out so I can try to get a good 5 or 6 hours of rest. The hard part will be staying up for the entire day. Not to mention, trying to wrap my mind around the fact that I will be reliving the 25th again!

I arrived in Lax at 6:30am after a very long flight. A miserable flight. We went through customs very quickly and it was very similar to Sydney and Melbourne which was cool to see. Baggage claim took forever, granted there were over 800 passengers told distribute luggage to but my patience was wearing thing.

The icing on the cake was when I found out my 10:00 am flight had been delayed until 1:15 pm. I was livid. I physically could not sit int eh airport for that long, nor was it worth it to take a 50 minute flight like that. We ended up getting completely refunded for my flight, canceled it, and then I got an Uber to San Diego.

My driver was very nice and I was in SD before 10:00 am. It was so good to see my parents and the Murphy's and the Mattingly’s! We headed to breakfast and just caught up on everything. I missed them so much!

now it is time for the second vacation to start, the real struggle will be staying awake. Jet lag is about to be REAL. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I don’t think there are words to describe how much I have learned and how life changing this experience abroad has been. I think traveling abroad is dangerous because now all I can think of is “Where to next?”

I am so lucky to have been given this opportunity. I want to thank everybody who pushed me to go abroad, and helped me make it possible. Specifically my parents, who worked so hard and sacrificed so much to be able to help me make my dream a reality. I would like to thank Devin, my friends and family (that includes you Mattingly's and Murphy’s) that either supported me or donated to my funds for this trip, and lastly Barrett Staff, specifically Susan and Miranda who pushed me to go on this adventure. This trip literally wouldn’t have been possible without all of you and I am forever grateful.

Thank you for the memories Australia! Cheers!

#barrettaustralia #barrettglobalcitizen #transformyourclassroom

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