#like a ghost because i was like 'wtf was that everyone is dead what what what' and none of them had seen it yet

[jinjeriffic]

DC x DP prompt/ficlet

Throwing my hat in the ring with this idea that has been doing the zoomies in my brain for days. The Tim/Danny Accidental Ghost Marriage to Fake Dating to Friends to Lovers AU:

Pariah Dark was a piece of shit. Before his imprisonment, mortals would sometimes manage to bargain with the Ghost King for scraps of power. One of the "standard" deals was to send PD a "Bride" to play with and feed on (because I HC he feeds on fear and pain) and what better way than a little mortal battery that couldn't get away from him? The deal was sealed with a cursed amulet. Now in one instance, the contract was never fulfilled (maybe the petitioner died before he could complete his half) and the amulet was lost. After Pariah was imprisoned and couldn't make deals anymore the knowledge of the rituals needed was gradually forgotten since they didn't work anymore...

Eventually the amulet gets dug up by archeologists (maybe in Egypt or Mesopotamia?) and ends up in a traveling exhibit in Gotham. A Rogue robs the place (Riddler? Two-Face? doesn't really matter). When the Bats show up to foil the robbery, during the fight with the goons a drop of Red Robin's blood gets on the amulet, there's a blinding flash of green light and the amulet is suddenly glued to him.

While everyone is dazed by the ghostly magic flashbang, Fright Knight pops out of a portal, yoinks Red Robin across his saddle and jumps back through the portal before anyone can stop him. Cue the Bats trying to frantically figure out what in the multi-dimensional occult hell happened and where RR went?!

Meanwhile, Danny is disturbed to receive a ghostly missive in his college dorm to tell him that his Mail Order Bride has been delivered to his Ghost Zone Palace and is awaiting him so they can consummate their Unholy Matrimony.

----------------

Danny: Wtf I have to study I don't have time to get MARRIED

Fright Knight: I'm sorry my liege, but according to the laws of ghosts, gods and magic you already ARE

Danny: Wtf. How did this happen?

RR: I would like to know that too

Danny: Oh shit, you're a superhero. Frighty, you can't just kidnap people! Especially not SUPERHEROES!

RR: While that's good to hear, I would really like to know about this supposed marriage..?

FK: I am not aware of the exact details, I was merely summoned to retrieve the Bride of the Ghost King. There used to be standard magical contracts for this, which went into effect when the Bride bled on the King's Token...

RR: Shit

Danny: Hold on, PARIAH got married? Multiple times??

FK: ...but we can always consult the Royal Archivist, if we can dig him out from under the several thousand years worth of paperwork that piled up while there was no King actively ruling...

Danny: Oh ancients, am I gonna have to deal with that?? I have exams to prepare for, dude!

RR: ...the dead still have to do exams? And paperwork?? *horror*

-------------

Some time and explanations later...

Royal Archivist: It took some digging, but I believe I have found the contract in question. You are one Timothy Drake-Wayne, correct?

Tim: Fml

RA: Ahem. The contract was sealed with your mortal blood, as is standard procedure. Congratulations, you are officially King-Consort of the Infinite Realms! Until death do you part, and all that

Danny: Can I see that contract? ...This isn't in English

RA: Oh dear, looks like we will have to schedule your Royal Highness classes in reading cuneiform/hieroglyphics

Tim: Okay, does it say anywhere in that contract how to dissolve it? What's the procedure for a ghost divorce? Fright Knight mentioned the previous king being married multiple times

RA: Well usually, when Pariah tired of a consort he would simply devour their soul...

Danny: Ewwwww I am so not doing that

Tim: I concur. I can't imagine my soul would taste good anyway

Danny: That's what you took from that??

RA: ...but when you die and your soul passes into the Afterlife proper, the contract will be fulfilled. As long as you're not resurrected again.

Tim: Nuts, there goes that loophole

RA: Until then you are the Consort and duty-bound to fulfill his Royal Highness' every whim; ghostly, spiritual, carnal...

Danny: *sinks through the floor in embarrassment*

Tim: Can't he just... release me from the contract? Take the amulet off me or something?

RA: Not without obliterating your soul, no

Danny and Tim: Fuck

--------------

Some time later, while Danny is away consulting other ghosts on possible ways of dissolving the contract, they discover the nasty little clause that if Tim isn't in regular physical contact with Danny the amulet starts draining his life force. To prevent victims from escaping you see... Danny really really hates Pariah right now.

They eventually return to the mortal plane to explain to the Batfam what the hell is going on and that they're still trying to fix it. In the meantime, Danny can't miss any more classes (studying areospace engineering at MIT or sth) and Tim has to stick close to him because of the curse...

Alfred: Oh dear, looks like Master Timothy will have to go to college after all *unflappable British Smugness*

Bruce pulls a lot of strings to fast track Tim getting his high school diploma and let him attend classes with Danny (he's not officially enrolled yet, but Money, Dear Boy). They never know when Danny has to respond to a ghost emergency or Red Robin to a Bat emergency, so they stay pretty much joined at the hip in their civilian lives. Of course there's gonna be rumors. Why did the Wayne CEO suddenly drop everything to go to college? So they make up a story about Danny and Tim having been secret boyfriends for a while and Tim becoming so smitten that he moves with him to Boston...

Cue the fake dates, interviews with magazines, couple photoshoots to really sell the bit... and the two young men gradually becoming friends... and then "Feelings?? But what do I do?? He was forced into this?" etc.

[cursedzucchini]

You know what? Fuck it

DC x DP prompt #3

I think at least lmao.

Anyway! Jason starts making videos on YouTube for one reason or another (is really stressed, no one listens to his rants Abt books who cares). His content is mostly bad books he read or really really really long rants Abt pride and prejudice. Like 3 hours on one tiny detail he noticed on his 214th read through.

He's kinda popular, mostly bc his terrible books videos. He talks Abt the ones that made him the most mad, which coincidentally are mostly romance and supernatural. Like he's one of the well known figures in the supernatural romance critique group (whcih is pretty small, but well). (Also he doesn't show his face on camera, bc secret identity and stuff, it's just his voice over a video of something mundane, like the sky or a room in which is a fly or something)

And now this can go two ways, that i can think of (w dead on main in mind at least)

1) one day Jason finds a book which is supernatural romance and is actually good. It has a kidna cliche system for the supernatural stuff, but with a refreshing twist. The characters have depts and flaws, yet are still very likable. The plot is actually interesting and overall the story's theme is death, not belonging anywhere and overall stuff that is very close to Jason's heart. The story doesn't shy away from violence and it is suprisingly accurate.

(I'm.gonna reblog this w pretty long idea of what this book could be Abt, bc i don't wanna annoy ppl lol)

Anyway Jason kinda falls in love w it, and it becomes famous for being the first novel Jason rated positively or something.

Meanwhile Danny, who was told by jazz writing is good way to get his feeling out, and just wanted to make a quick buck, is really fucking confused how tf did his book become so popular and who tf is this nerd who rates books for a living.

(basically big fan Jason and suspicious/awkward Danny lmao)

2) there is a famous series on Jason profile. It's the worst fucking series he ever read and it's just fucking awful. All the characters are fucking terrible, always going on and on about one thing, the romance sucks in a way that isnt even funny. Jason would love to believe some wrote this as a joke, if it wasn't for the absolute cringefest this was, and it wasn't a whole ass series!! Like who writes 12 books for a joke?

Danny ducking Fenton that's who. Dude was so ducking annoyed at his rogues, he threatened them w writing a terrible romance novels abt them. The ghosts, knowing his terrible grade in literature backed off for a moment, before someone crossed the line. And write Danny did. It was the worst thing he had ever written, the love interest was perfect caricature yet still faithfully go the original. And Danny, because fuck them he lost sommuch sleep over that one prank, decided to publish it. (The book was pretty thin so it didn't take that much time writing it). Unfortunately it became immensely popular in the infinite realm. So the ghosts started crossing lines on purpose. Before Danny figured it out, he had already published his fifth book and was writing another three. After some bargaining, getting a book written Abt them as a piece of shit love interest became a reward.

And while yeah, he had to say his writing was terrible and the books sucked, some small part of him was kinda proud y'know? Like a mother of her twelve ugly as fuck toddlers.

So when he saw some nerd on the internet not only shit talk his book, but also get money of it?

Danny decided to haunt him (just like his books did him, now that everyone knew Abt them thanks to this guy)

(enemies (sorta it's not that serious tho) to lovers ala terrible writer Danny who hates his books and kinda famous YouTuber hasn't who also hates Danny's books)

--

Fuck this is way too long wtf. Anyway imma reblog this w 1) book idea. Might add whatever i think the twelve books could be Abt. Pls if u want to add anything to this pls do!!

[ohbo-ohno]

🗑️ Creep Johnny this, creep Johnny that. What I want is a creepy Simon. Like he just walks up to Johnny and is like "I think you buy a new couch" and soaps like wtf are you talking about? And when he's on leave he gets home and sure enough his couch has a broken spring.

Simon sends him the exact amount of money he needs to purchase the couch he was JUST looking at on his laptop- since when did simon get his personal address? Or his bank info????

Then Simon just starts. Saying the weirdest shit. Like "the freckles on your taint are cute." Like what??? Not even going to pretend to NOT be looking? And sometimes he'll comment about Johnny wearing less boxer briefs on missions (how does he know it's not like Johnny strips to his underwear and shows off to his l.t. so how does the man know?) Or how he doesn't like Johnny's shower curtains.

And then Simon sends him a selfie (mask on ofc) of himself half naked in Johnny's home bathroom while the man himself is still on base.

And then shit just gets downright strange. He'll come home from base, and find that half his clothes are stuffed into one side of his closet, the other half filled with shit too large for him to wear, smelling like his lieutenant. There's extra toothbrushes, trinkets lying around, food he doesn't usually like in his fridge.

And then the next day Simon walks in with his duffle bag filled with his stuff and acts like they've been living together forever??? His name is somehow also on their lease??

He tries to talk to his family about it but they're all like "Oh, Simon? That nice fellow who visited us while you were deployed? He mentioned being your boyfriend, he was such a nice fellow."

And Johnny just has to live with it. Because he suddenly got saddled with a giant buff boyfriend who he kinda had a crush on so is it really THAT bad?? In the grand scheme of things, Simon could have been A LOT worse, knowing that freak of nature.🗑️

ghost harassing and violating soap will ALWAYS be famous

there have GOT to be a million fics with this general plot and trashy i would LOVE to recommend them to you but unfortunately i am woefully naive to the ghoap fanfictions of ao3. someone send recs

i love ALL OF THIS & im going to add some of my own thoughts but i'm not like. changing your idea lol (btw i love when you said "then it gets strange" as if the first part wasnt strange lmao)

i looove the idea of everyone else on base being super uncomfortable around ghost but not helping johnny out at all with his very obvious obsession because they're just like "better you than me buddy". they're in a large meeting and ghost literally lifts johnny off of his own chair and sets him in his lap, tucks a hand up under his shirt and gropes his pec, and literally everyone is just like "doo doo doo... nothing happening over there..."

im also obsessed with the idea of ghost not even TRYING to act like he's not stalking soap. he's loud and proud about using johnny's toothbrush after him for just a TASTE of his boy. he's jacking off in soap's shampoo and will mention it in front of other people. ghost will look soap dead in the eyes and say "washed your laundry yet? don't. i want your boxers for tonight" and just WALK AWAY

alssososooooooooo ghost moving into soap's house without asking!??!?!? are you insane!?!??!?!!? just absolutely refuses to leave, doesn't understand why soap's so angry, refuses to acknowledge his discomfort. will kick johnny out of his own bed when he starts being too bad :/ starts changing things to his own preference, just scoffs and rolls his eyes when johnny complains

[evilminji]

(Ironically) Oh My God... ( o.o)

Do... okay, so there are many, MANY religions... JUST here on earth. Right?

Not all of them think there is "an afterlife". Some think there is a NEXT life. Potentially MANY lives. Some also believe in JOURNEYS you must take, to reach THE Afterlife. Or perhaps periods of judgment. Evaluations of WORTH. So forth and so on.

What I am saying is?

There? Are Ghosts who probably just straight up REJECT the premise that they are dead. Oh sure, YOU might be. Or BELIEVE you are. But they KNOW they aren't.

Because The Gods Said So.

Some, are also, AWARE they are Dead. But reject that? All this? This is it. No, no. This is the MIDDLE. They are supposed to GO somewhere. They haven't FOUND it. But when they DO. They will, as a community, make a map for those who follow and head on in! It'll be great!

There are FAITHS in the Zone.

Beliefs that were compatible enough, that they Did Not Die.

And they'd probably like to tell you about it.

Why WOULDN'T they? It was a VERY important part of their daily life, originally. And NOW? Is frankly a Highly Topical Subject, don't you think? The discussion of "is there a God?" Is KINDA important to have, when you're stand outside the gates to SOMEWHERE, and none of who can agree on WHAT is on the other side.

Is it better to stay here? Were we abandoned? Is this a punishment or a blessing? An accident? Freak occurrence? Are there Gods HERE? And if so, does that mean WE can become one? What does that MEAN, if we can?

All HIGHLY important topics to discuss.

But! It's made all the more pressing because? There's all these OTHERS! Who have never even HEARD of your gods teachings. And therefore? Don't know where they are.

They, innocent people, have been TRAPPED HERE, for centuries if not longer. May be condemned to be trapped FOREVER. Anyone with even a scrap of empathy would be HORRIFIED.

The problem is that THEY are horrified too. Think YOU are trapped. And of course, your first impulse is to tell them they are Wrong... but?

Are they?

What if NEITHER of you are Wrong? Elder Beings keep insisting this place is INFINITE. It is therefore ENTIRELY possible, this is a place to simply? Store the place before afterlifes. Like a busy road.

After all, your Gods certainly never mention these new people. And THEIR God (singular, correct? Right.) never mentioned YOUR people. Surely they WOULD have, if it was important!

And such concensus starts to build. Because everyone is trying to move on, pray, ascend, or otherwise do as their holy scriptures told them too. They are ALL rather lost and confused. And UNLIKE those Fight-y violent sorts? THESE fine religious folks are pleasant and sensible.

Even if no one can quite agree. Meh. SOMEONE is right here and I shall live assuming it's me until proven otherwise, respectfully and as the gods preached.

And it's quite literally like religious Fandoms, to make light of things a bit. There is bickering. And "stop that infernal CHANTING, I can't here my self pray!" *chanting grows louder in protest* "ARGH!". And trying to make new, confused ghosts welcome.

It's one of the ZONES within the Zone. Like slowly gravitating towards like, until the Zone itself started to just naturally shuffle them all together in clumps. Like with the academics.

Now why? Do I even bring this up?

Because! I think it would be HILARIOUS if everyone wanted to convert the Newly Crowned Ghost King to THEIR religion, under the belief that he could? As some sort of Holy Divine King, ask GOD(tm) : "Bruh. Wtf are we supposed to be doing? We are SO LOST. Can we have a hint?"

And yeah, half of them are like "just for fiiiive minutes! We can totally kick you out of the Temple afterwords if you don't like it! You totally WILL, obviously, because it's AWESOME. But, like, if you WANT too! Five minutes! Pleeeeeease???"

While the others are just shooting Informative Pamphlets out of alien potato cannons in FULL religious regalia. As Danny flees at full speed. Getting pelted.

Maybe some real weird Space Monk is just ( o-o) *is under Danny's Bed. Makes eye contact when he leans down to look for his shoes* "one of us? One of us?" "How did you even get passed the ghost sheilds?" "The Gods have many paths." "Not helpful! And terrifying! Get out from under my bed." *awkward scurry* 👉👈 "one of us?" "No. Back to the Zone, you know better." *sad mantis-otter Space Monk noises*

Just? As a writer, I am a bastard. And I think Danny should get harrased by Court Officials wanted him to Govern more. It's funny. He is a teenager and doesn't know shit. It's like watching an Esteemed Academic Conference being lead by someone's toddler. They don't know what's going on! But they Sure Are Giving Answers! :D

@hypewinter @ailithnight @mutable-manifestation @hdgnj @nerdpoe @the-witchhunter

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

dead boy detectives but i've never watched it (read: 0% plot 100% gay summary)

[HI MAGGOTS IT'S 11:16 PM ON 6TH MAY HERE AND I'M ONLY NINETEEN FOR A LITTLE WHILE LONGER AND I'M GONNA DO MY BEST TO SAVE THIS AMAZING SHOW BECAUSE SO MANY OF YOU LOVE IT. BECAUSE OF THE HORRORS™ IN MY BRAIN (aka depresso) I HAVEN'T WATCHED IT AS SOON AS IT CAME OUT, BUT THAT MEANS I CAN MAKE THIS POST]

BUT ANYWAY, THANKS @anthropomorphique FOR THE IDEA, HERE'S WHAT I'VE FIGURED OUT, ABOUT DEAD BOY DETECTIVES:

There is dead gay repressed Edwardian twink named Edwin.

He has that autism rizz.

A cat king god (a cat who is a god? a god who is sometimes a cat? a god of cats? a god of kings? a king of cats? the cat of a king? the king of cat gods? the god of cat kings? WHAT IS HE IDK BUT HE'S A GAY LIL SLUT) wants to do the ol' hanky panky with him.

A lot of people want to do the ol' hanky panky with him. He be pullin' bitches.

Except for the bitch he's in love with, his best friend and soul partner, Charles.

Charles is full of Charm and Whimsy and Making Friends.

He has trauma.

(The previous point was obvious to me after learning point 6 but then I realised maybe I should be clear)

There's a... some kind of creature named Niko and she reads a lot of explicit gay manga.

She tries to use it to help Edwin out of his repression I think. I don't know if it works. Edwardian bitches do be repressed like that.

She has... a deadly parasite? That's a lesbian relationship?

Are lesbians deadly parasites? I do not know. I am too much in awe of lesbians to ask them.

The Cat King gives Edwin white lilies. Like I said, Edwin got that 'tism rizzm.

Niko and Edwin are weird besties.

CAITLIN REILLY IS IN THIS IDK WHO SHE PLAYS BUT SHE IS SUCH A GOOD ACTRESS I'VE BEEN A FAN OF HER FOR YEARS FROM YOUTUBE CAITLIN REILLY IS IN THIS *SCREAMS*

THIS IS PART OF THE SANDMAN UNIVERSE!! So @neil-gaiman is not the show's creator, but it is his universe and a bunch of his characters and he wrote a few scenes I think?? IDK SANDMAN FANS COME HELP ME.

Edwin goes to hell and Charles saves him? I think?

Death is very lovely.

OH THEY SOLVE MYSTERIES OF GHOSTS SO THEY CAN BE DEAD I FORGOT TO MENTION THE PREMISE OF THE SHOW HELP I'M SORRY I WAS SO FOCUSED ON THE GAY

EDWIN AND CHARLES LOVE EACH OTHER VERY MUCH

AND THEY HAVE... THE REST OF FOREVER TO FIGURE IT OUT?

UM THERE'S A PLOT I SWEAR I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT IT IS I'VE JUST SEEN MAGGOTS SCREAMING ABOUT THE GAY

...GAY.

Okay so so so this show needs a second season but apparently Netflix's thinking of cancelling it because not enough people are streaming it (IT'S BARELY BEEN OUT A WEEK OR SOMETHING WTF??) so PLEASE GO WATCH IT EVERYONE WHO'S SEEN IT LOVES IT AND I CAN'T WAIT TO WATCH IT RAGH ANYWAY I LOVE YOU EITHER WAY HAVE THE LOVELIEST OF DAYS <3

[aachria]

So like..... I had a DREAM

so it was the marineford war, expect it was on my grandma's roof, my DEAD grandma's roof, (we kinda sold the house after she died, so like last time I saw that roof was back when I was 12) and ED was there, and for some reason they were my cousin's step sibling? Wtf? And not just any cousin, no, nah- it's the one that HATES one piece with a passion, (I remember fighting with him once about it and like got pushed and ended up breaking my leg, but no worries I gave him a black eye hehe~ [he insulted Louf's DREAM!!!!!!]) So yeah Ed was my ¿step-cousin?

And remember when you asked what tattoo do we think Ed would get, well since I didn't really have an answer my consciences came up with something, ED HAD A FULL SLEEVE DRAGON MAFIA LOOKING TATTO FOR SOME REASON AHHHHH-

And for some reason my cousin was wearing a maid's dress?

ANYWAYS there was an oven there too and Kizaru was cooking pizza while waiting for the execution to start.. And Ed didn't want to take it because and they said something along the lines of "No way! I don't eat pizza, I'm strictly anti-cannibal!"I don't really remember well.

And there was a time skip. [Like total blank I don't remember shit]

And then somehow we ended up in my current roof, wich have very very VERY low walls so like people were falling everywhere (and my cousin was no longer there wohoooooo!)

And like Santa clause came in riding chopper and said "English or Spanish" and then for some reason the fight became medieval style with horses and swords and shit and then ghosts?

Yk the SpongeBob ghost, yah dude appeared and gave his hat to Ed who was now wearing a knight armor, and then Ed gave everyone the middle finger and went "Domain expansion: skibidi toilet" and yeah we saved Ace!!!

And it ended with me jumping off the roof because yah- 👍🏼

Wonderful dream 10/10 would try again

I have no words and yet so very many questions

[beetle-blogging]

Don't judge me, but Rory is genuinely my favorite character in BJBJ.

Like, he's awful and obnoxious and I want to hit him with a mallet, but pretty much every single line of his is comedy gold in an "oof, WTF?" kind of way. His brand of evil his mundane, but that's what makes it work.

He's a better villain than Jeremy or Delores because it becomes clear to the audience pretty quickly (at least to me, from Lydia's "I'm sorry for making you feel bad") that he's been chipping away at Lydia's psyche for a long time, boiling-a-frog style. He's manipulative and emotionally abusive - in a way so cringey that, as I mentioned, it circles back around to being funny - rather than violent, but anyone familiar with abuse patterns knows that this type of guy is not necessarily above violence, he'll just wait to do violence until he thinks he'll get away with it. Which, with Charles being dead, Astrid being uncaring of her Mom's life choices, and Delia ordering venomous snakes, would have been quite soon.

He's motivated by money. He said "meet weak women and exploit them." Not to wash his socks and suck his dick, but to get at their money. I think it's incredibly likely that he had planned to get rid of Lydia via murder shortly after both her parents had died and she had inherited their combined wealth from her dad's real estate business and Delia's art. Cause it's not like Rory just had some maladaptive behavior patterns. He absolutely knew what he was doing. I doubt he'd have stuck with her till the end of their natural lives. It would have been easy, too, even for a guy who likely wouldn't have the balls to be direct about it. After all, everyone knows Lydia is that lady who sees ghosts. She's crazy, and morbid, and obsessed with the afterlive. She takes Benzos (that Rory controls her access of, so it'd be easy to pocket a few to give her an overdose later) to get through the day, and she just lost both her parents.

Cringey, overdramatic guy or not, Rory is far more scary than even Betelgeuse. At least Betelgeuse sticks to agreements and is frequently less bad than you expected.

Terrible person, fantastic villain 10/10.

[axelsagewrites]

Jon Snow*Blind Date

Pairing: Modern!Jon Snow x f!Reader

Platonic: Sam, Gilly, Cregan, Robb, Sansa, Theon, and Tormund

Summary: Jon's friends bully him into going on a blind date he's sure he will regret but by the end he is head over heels for her

TW: Swearing and inuendo but nothing major

Word count: 3459 (I got carried away lol)

Masterlist Here

“Dude, I said no,” Jon said rejecting Sam’s offer yet again.

Sam and Gilly sat across from the stubborn Snow as they ate lunch and Sam questioned why he even tried. “Why not though?” Sam asked.

“Because I don’t need you to set me up with someone. I can find my own dates,”

“Really?” Sam said staring at Jon in disbelief. Gilly let out a giggle as her boyfriend began to berate the boy, “Last week all you did was write poetry about how alone and sad and moody you were. You’ve went full emo,”

“First of all, that was for class,” Jon glared at Sam only receiving a smirk in return, “Secondly I thought that was private,”

“And if you had a girlfriend then you would know-nothings private,”

“He’s right you know,” Gilly pipped up. Jon liked Gilly. He liked Sam. He liked them together. But right now, he wanted to slap the pair's heads together and storm off. But Jon chose to rise above and be mature.

“Yeah, well fuck you both,” he grumbled as he began to almost stab the food on his tray with his fork. “I’m happy being single,”

“Since when were you happy?” Cregan asked as he sat to join them for lunch.

“Im trying to set Jon up with my mate but he’s being stubborn. As always,”

“Ooo which girl?” Cregan asked before quickly adding “Or guy or whatever it is you’re into. You are into people, aren’t you?”

The three laughed as Jon’s attack on his food increased, “People that aren’t assholes yeah. I don’t get why you’re so insistent on this,”

“Because one day Jon,” Sam folded his arms, leaning on the table, and began his tale, “I’m going to realise I haven’t heard from you in a while and decide hey I should check on him. So, me and Gilly are gonna come over to your sad little apartment and break in. And what will I find? You dead on the couch and Ghost circling your body like a vulture. And I don’t wanna Gilly to see that,”

“Ghost isn’t gonna fucking eat me when I die,” Jon snapped, “Do you really think im gonna die alone? Do you think I can’t get a date that badly?” Gilly, Sam, and Cregan all shared a look “Okay fuck all of you,”

“I just think it’d be good for you to get out the house,” Gilly pipped up and the other two nodded in agreement before she added, “Besides you’ll be less tense if you get laid,” making everyone’s jaws drop, “Im serious. I used to be even more stressed than you Jon and then I met Sam and ever since I’ve just been- “

“I don’t think we need to talk about that darling,” Sam cut her off.

“Seconded,” Cregan said, “but she’s right. You need to get laid,”

Jon sighed and Sam looked between his friends and questioned his life decisions, “While I’d prefer you didn’t just ‘use’ them for sex, I genuinely think you would like them,”

“We didn’t say to use them for sex,” Gilly said but Jon ignored her.

Jon sighed and pushed his tray away since his food was now closer to mush than anything else from his stabbings, “Fine. One date,” Jon said, and the group let out a cheer, “but I swear to god Sam they better not be crazy or something,”

“By something he means ugly,” Cregan said, and Jon slapped the back of his head. “Ow dude wtf?”

Sam grinned, “Don’t worry. I know your type. You’ll like them,”

Jon Snow’s mystery date was all the talk of their friend group. Robb had found out, Tormund found out, and Theon had found out. He even got a text from Sansa about it. all of them bombarded him with tips and tricks and lines to use. Sansa demanded he Facetime her to pick his outfit out.

As Jon was getting ready to leave his room was filled with all said annoying friends bar Sansa but she was texting him so much it felt like she was practically there. “And when you get to the restaurant- “Cregan started, and Jon let out an agonising groan.

“Shut up,” he whined, “I know what to do on a date,”

“We know mate but,” Tormund began, “you haven’t been the same since Ygritte. We just don’t want you giving up if it doesn’t go to plan,”

“I’m not gonna give up,” Jon said as he looked at himself in the mirror. The outfit Sansa bullied him into was a white button-up and weird checked trousers that were ‘trendy’ right now. Jon sighed as he began to unbutton it, “Besides Ygritte was a long time ago,”

She had been his first-ever girlfriend he got the week of university. It was good at first, but they were always fighting and bickering. They were constantly breaking up and getting back together. The whole ordeal lasted a year and messed Jon up. Especially since he didn’t realise, they weren’t getting back together until he found out she was seeing Orell.

“You’re not cancelling,” Sam warned Jon who in return through his shirt at him.

“Im just changing shirts calm down,” he said as he pulled out a black shirt and black jeans. “Do I at least get to know anything about this person before im trapped at a table for an hour with them?”

“They’re in my history of medicine and herbology class, from Kingslanding, same age as us, funny, and extremely sarcastic,” Sam listed.

“Is that it?”

“You’ll have to find the rest out yourself,”

“Do I at least get a name?” Jon asked as he began to tie his doc boot laces.

“(Y/N),”

“Oh, I like them!” Robb pipped up, “Yeah, they tutored me in Dornish lit last year. Only reason I didn’t flunk out,”

“Oh, yay maybe I can study tonight,” Jon deadpanned before turning to look in the mirror, “How do I look?”

“Perfect,” Sam said.

 “Very emo,” Cregan chimed in with a smirk causing Jon to roll his eyes.

“Hot bro,” Theon blew Jon a kiss and received a slap on the head from Cregan. “Can’t a bro appreciate another hot bro?”

Theon was ignored and Robb spoke up, “Sansa’s gonna kill you but you look good dude. Don’t worry. It’s just a date,”

“Im not worried,” Jon lied as he continued to try straightening out his already straight shirt.

Robb grabbed Jon's leather jacket and helped him shrug it on, “Of course not,” he said as he held Jon's shoulders, “You’ve got this,”

Jon was standing outside the restaurant with his gaggle of hens following him, “You’re not coming on this date with me you know?”

Sam rolled his eyes, “I was just gonna point them out then we were gonna head to the The Wall bar encase you need us,”

“I won’t need you,” Jon said causing Sam and Robb to share a look “Shut up,” Jon grumbled as he looked into the restaurant, “So who is it?”

Sam pointed them out and the nerves instantly flooded Jon's system. They had got there early and were already sitting down looking absolutely gorgeous. They weren’t even trying. They were just sitting there playing with a fork and staring out a window and yet Jon was already feeling his mouth go dry, “Dude they’re well out of my league,”

“I said the same thing about Gilly and look at us now. Now go get em tiger,”

“I hate you,” Jon said before walking up to the restaurant door, “Here I go,” Jon took a deep breath and forced himself into the building, throwing a quick glance back to where Robb and Sam were giving him a thumbs up like some kind of child.

“Table for one?” The hostess asked.

Jon cleared his throat, not even sure what name the reservation was under, “I’m meeting someone here. For a date,” he began to stutter and cursed himself mentally, “I think they’re- “

“Jon?” she asked, and he nodded as a blush began to flush his cheeks, “They were sat a few minutes ago. Come with me,” she said and led Jon to his table who was desperately trying to walk normally and not fall into a deep hole and die. “Your dates here,” the hostess grinned as Jon sat down across from his mystery date who even the hostess knew before him. “Here are your menus. Have fun you two,” she said before leaving.

“Hi- “

“I’m- “

“Sorry you go- “

“You go first- “

The pair let out an awkward laugh before she quickly jumped in, “Hey,” she said with a smile stuck to her lips that were perfect just like her smile.

Jon found his face flushing yet again, “Hey. A friend of yours im guessing?” he asked nodding to the hostess who kept glancing at them.

“Yeah,” she laughed despite him not making a joke, “That’s Baela. Sorry if she keeps spying on us. She traded a shift just to watch me crash and burn,” Jon laughed and smiled as a blush filled her face instead of his for once, “Not that I think im gonna crash and burn im sorry let me start again. I’m (Y/N),” she said as she stuck her hand out to shake his and Jon saw her cringe at her own actions.

But he just grinned and shook her hand in return, “I’m Jon,” she took her hand back and his hand had never felt colder.

“Sorry about the handshake,”

“No, it’s good. Handshakes are good,” Jon reassured her, glad that it was not only him sweating buckets over this date. “I’ve never had a date shake my hand before,”

“I’ve never had a blind date before,”

“Me neither. Sam practically bullied me into this. He wouldn’t even tell me your name,”

“Me too,” she grinned. “Well, he let me know your name, but he forbade me to look up your social media,”

“You wouldn’t find much im afraid,”

“Not an Instagram guy?” she asked, and Jon shook his head, “Hmm I suppose I can forgive you,”

“Oh, so kind of you,” Jon said, and she laughed, “I guess we should probably look at the menu. That waiter looks like he’s ready to pounce,”

(Y/N) smiled, opening her menu, but it dropped once she looked up to the waiter, “Oh fuck,”

“What?” Jon asked, dropping his menu and looking to see what she had been staring at. It had been their waiter who had skulked off as soon as she had looked up. “Do you know him?”

“I’m sure it’ll be fine,” she said as she tried to shake it off, but Jon kept looking at her causing her to sigh, “That’s my ex. Baela swore he was off tonight or I would’ve said somewhere else,”

“Is it okay? Do we need to leave?” Jon asked, fully ready to walk half the earth for this girl he had only had half a conversation with.

She sighed and took a second to think “Nah it’ll be fine. Yeah, no it’ll be fine. He broke up with me anyway plus it was like a year ago so like yeah, its fine. Plus, they do a really good cheesecake I wanna get for dessert so its fine,” Jon couldn’t help but find her rambling adorable, but his silence caused her to look at him, “As long as you’re okay with it?”

“As long as the cheesecake as is good as you say,” he joked.

She laughed and picked up her menu, “Oh I promise its more than just good,”

After the pair had looked at the menu their chat was interrupted “(Y/N),” their waiter greeted not even glancing at Jon.

“Ramsay,” she said giving a tight-lipped smile, “How are you?”

“I'm fine. What can I get yous?” he asked and Jon's face contorted at how he didn’t even pretend to be courteous. (Y/N) also appeared shocked as she began to stutter her order and he wrote it down. “What about you?” he asked not even looking at Jon. Jon was so baffled that he didn’t even respond causing Ramsey to ask again “Well?”

“I’ll have the gourmet burger and a coke,”

“You’ll have the Pepsi,” Ramsey said as he turned and walked away from the table.

Jon and (Y/N) looked at each other with a look of half horror half confusion, “Was he always such an asshole?”

“I mean yeah but I assumed he’d at least pretend at work. Im so sorry,”

“Don’t apologise for him,” Jon assured her “Why did you even date him?”

She laughed but her face was anything but happy, “Can we save toxic ex stories for date two?”

“I understand. I mean like. I get it,” Jon said, and relief flooded her face, “We’ve all got some shitty stories I guess?”

“Yeah, but let’s focus on the good ones for now. Baela will kill me if I scare you off before dessert,”

“Good thing I don’t scare easily,”

From there the conversation flowed so easily that even Ramsey's bluntness couldn’t ruin the night. They had so much in common and Sam was right. She was funny and kept up with his quick tongue.

“You’re an idiot if your serious think Aegon the conquering was- “

“Dessert?” Ramsey interrupted their debate as he began to take their plates away.

The pair shared a look before (Y/N) spoke up, “Could we get the cheesecake and- “but she was cut off by his scoff, “What?”

“Do you really need the cheesecake?”

Jon felt a hot rage go up his spine as he glared daggers into Ramsey. (Y/N) went instantly red and was stumbling to even get a word out so Jon spoke up. “Give us one of each dessert,”

“You want four desserts?” Ramsey finally actually looked at Jon whose gaze could cut metal right now.

“Yup. Problem?”

“Whatevs. Coming right up,” Ramsey said as he sauntered off to the kitchen.

“Don’t listen to a word that guy says. He’s an asshole. I don’t understand why you ever dated him. And you said the dessert was good so we’re trying each one no arguments,”

(Y/N) smiled and Jon almost forgot the anger at the sight of it, “He was nice once. I think. Im honestly not so sure now,” she laughed but her voice was fragile.

Jon grabbed her hand without even thinking, “You deserve someone way better than him. You’re so,” Jon shook his head trying to think of the right word, “I don’t think I’ve ever met someone so perfect,”

“You barely even know me,”

Jon sighed as he debated if he should go against everything his friends had told him and lay himself out on the table, “I had my own Ramsey. And well, there’s a lot to that story but long story short she just. She was just not good for me. Now I don’t even know why we ever dated but she messed with my head, and I haven’t gone on a date since until now. And I can honestly say I’ve had more fun tonight than I did in the whole year I knew her,”

He expected her to run, to excuse herself to the bathroom and climb out a window, but she squeezed his hand instead, “I get that. I really do. I was thinking the same thing about Ramsey this whole time. How could I date someone as pig headed as him- “she said causing Jon to chuckle, “when I could’ve been with someone like you,”

“Maybe blind dates aren’t so bad after all,” Jon said, and she smiled. They stayed looking into each other’s eyes till Ramsey ruined it yet again by ungraciously dumping four plates and 2 spoons on the table.

 They didn’t let it ruin the mood and spent another hour sitting and chatting as Jon experienced the best cheesecake of his life. They must’ve been too happy for Ramsey's liking who decided to dump the bill on their table without even asking but made sure to add, “Remember it's rude not to leave a tip,”

“Its official. I have better taste than you,” Jon joked as he pulled out his wallet.

“Hey, I need to stalk this Ygritte girl before you get to judge,”

“Fine fine,” Jon said as he began to take cash out, “It was 38.50 but I only have $20s and I don’t wanna leave him $1.50,”

“Here I have change,” (Y/N) said as she pulled out $18.50 in cash, “You can pay me back by getting me a drink at The Wall on our next date,”

“Oh, can I? your so kind,” Jon said though internally he was bouncing off the walls at the idea of another date with this perfect specimen.

“I know,” she said as she scrunched her nose up and Jon thought he may die from her cuteness, “Do you have a pen though? I wanna leave him a ‘tip’,”

Jon passed her a pen and tried to watch what she was writing but she hid it and closed the bill holder with a grin, “We should go. Now,”

The pair rushed to the host stand for (Y/N) to say a quick goodbye to Baela. As she was telling Baela she’d text her they heard a “Hey!” from across the restaurant and the pair turned to see Ramsey pushing through tables to get to them.

“Go, go, go,” (Y/N) laughed as she grabbed Jon's arm and hauled him out of the restaurant, and ran across the road, narrowly dodging a car.

Ramsey flipped them off, unable to leave the restaurant but as soon as he walked back in the pair broke out into a laughing fit, “What did you write?”

(Y/N) laughed harder, “I told him how to find the clit,” she said, and Jon laughed even harder.

“Oh, my gods I love that,” He was almost crying at this point, “This is the best thing Sam has ever forced me to do,”

“Im glad,” she laughed as she looked up at Jon, “It’s getting late. My roommate said if I didn’t get back by 11, she was calling the cops,”

“Well, I don’t need to get arrested again,”

“Again?” she asked, and Jon laughed, “Am I dating a gang leader or something?”

“I’ll tell you as I walk you to your dorm?” Jon offered.

(Y/N) grinned and nodded as the pair began to walk back to campus, “At least you’re a gentleman gang man,”

Jon was disappointed as they reached the door to her dorm knowing he would have to wait to see her again, “So if you don’t do insta do you at least have a phone number?” (Y/N) asked as she leaned back against her front door.

“Gimme your phone I’ll put it in,” he said, and she complied.

“This better not be a fake number Jon Snow,” she teased as he handed the cell back to her.

Despite his anxiety at the beginning Jon felt his confidence grow with every joke and come back. He didn’t even think as he stepped closer, leaving only an inch between them, “Don’t worry its very real. I promise,”

“Good,” she grinned as she brought her hands to rest on his shoulders, “I had fun tonight,”

“Me too,” Jon said as he leaned in closer, placing his hand on her waist. “I really wanna kiss you right now,” he confessed as his lips ghosted hers.

She leaned in ever so slightly so that her lips brushed against his as she said, “Then do it,”

His lips fell onto hers and her arms pulled him in closer, so they were pressed against each other as their lips moulded together perfectly. Jon wanted it to last forever but as he grazed his teeth against her bottom lip she pulled back slightly, “If we don’t stop, I won’t be going into my room alone,”

“You’re lucky im a gentleman,” Jon said as he forced himself to pull back, letting her turn to unlock her door, “Another time?”

“I’m free tomorrow?” she offered.

Jon laughed but nodded, “Tomorrows great. Text me,”

“As soon as im through this door.” She said, “Goodnight Jon,”

“Goodnight,” he said as he stepped away and let her return to her dorm.

Jon was barely out the dorm's front door when he checked to see if she had indeed texted him. She had. A text from an unknown number saying, ‘Guess who?’. Jon laughed to himself as he texts her back before looking at the bombardment of texts his friends had sent him. But they could wait. He wasn’t gonna let Sam find out he was right ruining his night. Turns out blind dates aren’t always a bad idea.

[lemon-natalia]

Harrow the Ninth Reaction - Chapter 50

thirty minutes before the Emperor’s murder and i still have no idea who’s gonna do it or why

Commander Wake. the commander who is Gideon's mother. who is Awake, the Sleeper. Who is in Cytherea’s dead body. Cytherea being the one Gideon had a crush on. WHO IS BEING POSSESSED BY GIDEON’S DEAD MOTHER. WHO IS THE BOE LEADER, COMMANDER WAKE. i’m fucking speechless what is this

also she’s calling the Emperor ‘Gaius’, do they fucking know each other??

omfg her full name includes ‘Snap me back to reality oops there goes Gravity’ wtf. weirdly i feel like thats such a Gideon (Nav) name to have, except she’s taking it so seriously 

‘did the ten billion give you that too.’ ‘how many babies died in the bomb Gaius’ oh this guy really did cause the apocalypse somehow didn’t he, fuuuck

scratch the others, this is the most tense tea party there’s been so far

‘it’s all come out’ what in the world’s most dramatic intervention is this

COMMANDER WAKE ME UP INSIDE 

both Mercymorn and Augustine were conspiring with the BoE?? i didn’t see that coming, especially not Mercymorn

the eggs from the first message weren’t a metaphor????? they were literal goddamn eggs wtf

she was gonna kill said baby in order to enter the Locked Tomb, and nicknamed it the ‘Bomb’. um wow. why is everyone’s immediate plan in these books to jump straight to the baby murder. 

GIDEON (1.0) JUST KILLED HER?? again? can you even say you killed a ghost. what. what. i thought they were a thing what is going on. Gideon just saw her mother for the very first time in her life, talking about how she was planning to murder Gid as a baby, possessing the body of someone she had a crush on who also tried to kill her, get murdered. oh she’s gonna need so much counselling after this. 

speaking of, how the fuck did the relationship between Gideon 1.0 and Wake start, that feels very complicated 

and he thought the baby was his. key word being thought. not was. then who the fuck is the baby daddy. this whole shebang would make for a very entertaining episode of Dr Phil. or whatever tv shows it is that do dna tests, i don’t watch a lot of reality tv

i really didn’t think a conception story could get more fucked up than Harrow’s, but Gideon’s giving her a very strong run for her money

‘Hi, not fucking dead. I’m Dad’ YOU JUST FOUND OUT YOU HAVE A SECRET BABY WHY WOULD YOU SAY THIS. its been about a minute and he’s already cracking dad jokes. is making bad puns genetic in the Locked Tomb world or something, because that would say a lot about Gideon quite frankly 

i cannot believe the fact that these guys were in a threesome has been plot relevant two times over now

also Gideon is the fucking. daughter of the GOD of this world i guess. well there’s an explanation for why she’s so resistant to not dying then. if he wasn’t super dead, i think Silas’s reaction to this info would be so fucking funny

also. given Ianthe presumably doesn’t know about any of the details of Gideon’s birth, childhood, etc. she’s gotta be even more confused than Gideon right now

also also remember when i had that dream about the Locked Tomb? my subconscious is a prophet, apparently:

[myjollyfroggyfriend]

Stuff I loved about Dead Friend Forever (yes I'm late to the party don't mind me):

\!/ SPOILERS (obviously)

• they COMMITTED

Like they really went full gorey thriller aesthetic&plot, mad respect on that front + they also conveyed the trauma of high-school bullying terribly well (it was triggering to watch but done in a good way you know?)

• the plotwists were really well done and surprising, while still making sense

Phee being Non's ex bf all along?? Tan actually being New?? I ate that up

But also Non being dead since the beginning, making it a meta textual ghost story, like he's actually haunting everyone through the narrative? Chef's kiss.

• phenomenal acting from everyone

But Barcode especially like, the boy can ACT act (actually got chills during his mental breakdown scenes)

Do I have a crush on Ta now? Probably.

• good characterization and good writing

I really enjoyed all characters, they all were fully fleshed, even the secondary ones. You get to understand why Por is that way, why Tee did what he did (!!His backstory omg), even White has a purpose (smart twink we stan).

• I really liked all the couples

Really went from aw to ew to wtf to omg ok to HELP regarding TeeWhite, I liked their meet cute

I really really like PheeNon, give me 15 of these right now BeOnCloud please

I LOVED PheeJin, their story/relationship was really interesting and nuanced

• the ending aka COMEUPPANCE

Not to rephrase what everybody else has already said before but how every character meets their end is the exact reflection of what they did to Non... immaculate??

Like the bystander stabbing his own eyes (he didn't do anything, he just watched), the one who framed (for a camera!!) Non and used him to save his ass was used to kill his friend, the one who didn't do anything at all and got killed because he was INNOCENT, the first one to pick on Non to put himself forward died first and then everyone forgot about him (he literally wasn't important to the narrative & the group anymore), the one who filmed Non stabbing the same hand that held the camera over and over again, the one who literally did the worst ends up doing the worst and killing his lover. And the two who loved Non the most and betrayed him the most/abandoned him are stuck in a nightmare they can't escape.

LIKE

[life-is-unreal]

Watching from afar {Twisted Wonderland x Reader}

(Also published on Wattpad and Quotev, maybe ao3?) (the plot is similar but not the same) (updates=???) (shit grammar)

Prologue 0.1 - Mirror, Mirror On The Wall

"I swear to god, if there's another essay due today." You hissed, tapping away on your computer.

"I can't believe he set three essays without even telling us in class. Like bitch- WHAT THE FUCK THERE'S TWO MORE?"

You threw a slipper across the room, resisting the urge to chuck the computer, "It's expensive, it's expensive... I can't afford shit right now." You muttered, your hand clawing on your scalp.

"Brrrrrrringgggggggg. Briiiiiiiiiiiiing."

The sound of your phone ringing sounded heavenly compared to your ten hour grind on finishing all your essays due tomorrow. 

"Hellllo?"

"Hey Y/N! You wanna go to the amusement park that just opened up near school? By the way, 'no' isn't acceptable. I'm at your house so head down bitch."

"Annnnd she hung up."

You sighed. At least you had a reason to tell your parents on why you failed, you could blame everything on your dearest friend Marie.

"Heeyyyyy Marie." You slipped into the uber, shoving your best friend away as she tried to tackle you into a hug.

"Girlie, you look like those ghosts. Of course, you look as beautiful as ever but still." Marie flicked your forehead.

"Girl. I legit had to do three fucking essays in a day and there's two that I haven't done yet."

"...Wait. I have the same classes as you rightttt?"

You snorted, your half dead expression going away as the smile vanished on Marie's face. What's that saying? Smiles don't disappear, they just move to someone else's face.

"WE HAVE FIVE FUCKING ESSAYS DUE TOMORROW? SCUSE MOI?"

You clamped your hand over her mouth, pushing her down, "Bitch, we're in a fucking uber."

"Keugh, keugh. I mean, I can cancel the ride and send you guys back?" The uber driver said awkwardly.

"Sorry man, it's fine. My parent's have like, no hope on my studies so I'll be fine." Marie muttered, her soul sucked away from her body.

"Um. We're here now?" The uber driver, keeping his eyes straight ahead tapped the window.

"Uh, yeah haha. Uh, Y/N get your ass off. Let's go." Marie laughed awkwardly, pinching you hardly.

"Bitch what the fuck." You whisper-yelled in her ear.

"Shush, this shit awkward as fuck, now pretend you have a stomach ache." Marie elbowed your stomach hardly.

"ASFTEGHWGEU WTF?" You screeched, almost flinging her hand off you when you clutched your stomach in pain.

"Sorry girly pop, take one for the team y'know. SORRY MATE, MY FRIEND HERE SEEMS TO HAVE SOME STOMACHE PROBLEMS! GOTTA DASH!" Marie took hold of your hoodie and almost yeeted you towards the direction of the entrance.

"Bitch you owe me a popsicle." You snarled when the two of you had gotten inside.

"Heeeeey, I bought your ticket! It was hella expensive you know!" She whined, using her puppy eyes.

"I- eugh. Let's go then." The thing about Marie was that although she could be a hella insensitive and bitchy person, she was probably one of the top five best looking people in the school and other than being a bit two-faced she was a person with great personality, that is when she isn't bitchy and overly clingy. 

You and Marie's friendship began when she moved in to your neighborhood and the moment they moved in, it was made very clear that Marie's family was absolutely loaded. The first time you met was in high school. You had moved in a few months prior so the two of you began chatting as the two of you were the only 'new faces'.

Marie's problems shined through quite quickly when the two became more and more popular. You had gotten popular through brains and pretty looks whilst Marie had gotten popular because of her down right stunning looks.

Halfway through the first school year together, Marie had became friends with everyone under the 'popular' tag. You being her one and only "bestie" had hear all her remarks on other people.

"OMG Y/N, you know Sarah? The blondie? Like she's literally sooo toxic to her friends and everyone. Like bitch called me 'bestie' like noooo. Her? To be delulu enough to think that she's my bestie? Fuck no! Why would I want some ugly, stuck up, two faced bitch being my bestie. Girly pop, stick with me more. I don't want people like her bothering me."

"Hey bestiiiieeee. Did you see what happened in the cafeteria today? That new boy. That nerd. No? Eughhhhh, why don't you know any of the latest gossip??? Anyways, he got his ass whooped by one of the upperclassmen because he was talking to ThEiR GiRl. Like how cringgge is that shit?"

You had compared Marie to Regina from Mean Girls before but you decided that it didn't fit Marie that well. Marie was just as popular, just as two faced. But there was one thing for sure, she wasn't a total bitch. 

"Y/N! You wanna hang out today??? Pleeeeeaseee, you know that you're my only bestieeee. Come onnn. Let's go shopping, and yeaaaah I know you're broke and all that but that's why you need a rich bestie right? There you have the all so wonderful and fantastic me!"

"Y/N! Guess what! You know those bitchy girls from Year 12? I called some of my ahem, friends. Don't worry, they won't pick on you any more! Ain't I just succcch a wonderful person. By the way! It's your birthday this week right? I'm bought you that limited edition bag from that store you were eyeing. Uhhh, don't mind the price. You don't need to know about that. Ehe!"

Marie was clingy for sure and she gets angry easily contrary to how she acts in front of the popular people. She never gets angry because of you but you could see when she starts to get annoyed. She always gets annoyed when you hang too close to other people which is probably one of her toxic traits but you were pretty much fine with that as you found that she was fine with most people as long as they don't start calling you "Bestie".

There was also, one thing that Marie entrusted to you, and only you. Her deepest, darkest secret.

"Hey! Y/N! You listening to me?" Marie frowned, flicking your forehead. "You're zoning out again!"

"My baddddd. What you saying again?" You rubbed your fore head. Yeah, Marie's strength was also quite good.

"You wanna go to that mirror thingamajiggy room?"

"The what? Never mind. Let's go." You blinked wearily. 

"Did you actually grind for ten hours for those essays? It's not- Eugh. You being your top student. Your the fav student, they won't fail you as long you give a good enough reason you know?" Marie ruffled your hair. 

Hmmmm. Marie grew a few centimeters again. You sighed, you and your unmoving height.

You let the taller girl drag you through the crowd until you've reached the Hall of Mirrors, or as Marie calls it, the "mirror thingamajiggy room".

"Y/N girly pop. Stay here for a second. I think I saw those ice cream trucks nearby, I'll get some scoops, don't wander off like you always do. I'm not finding you for two hours again like what happened last year." Marie tapped your forehead. "You listening? I- Why do I even bother?" She rubbed her temples. "Stay put!" she called out, jogging towards the ice cream truck as she was hidden by the flowing visitors.

"What did she say?" You muttered. You removed your blue tooth headphones.

"Whatever, she probably went to the toilet or something." You raised your eyes, glancing at the entrance. For some reason, there was a smaller tent that had no queues next to the gigantic crowd going to the Hall of Mirrors.

You glanced weirdly at the bustling crowd. "They all blind or smth?"

Looking down at the weight that was leaning on your leg you rolled your eyes, "Marie really left her bag for me to carry." You slung her tote on your shoulder before trudging towards the little tent that was pretty much hidden in the shadows.

"Cold nights be like." You grumbled in annoyance, "What the hell did she put in her bag for it to be this heavy man? Gold?"

Ah, my lovely Lord,

"Sound effects? Seriously man?" You raised your brows as you entered the tent.

The noble and beautiful flower of evil,

You are the most beautiful, number one in this world.

"Whyyyyy. Thank you." You yawned sleepily. "Why am I here again?"

"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most..."

"For thee, guided by the Mirror of Darkness," You read off from the plaque in front of the mirror in the center.

Follow thy heart and take the hand of the one reflected in the mirror.

"Yoooo, these effects are kinda cool." You leaned forward, seeing black mist forming in the mirror.

Flames that turn even stars into ashes,

Ice that imprison even time,

Great tree that swallow even the sky,

"How poetic. I would applaud if this was in English class."

Don't be afraid of the power of darkness,

Come now, show your power.

Mine, theirs, and yours,

Your brows furrowed slightly as you felt yourself walking towards the largest mirror.

"Am I so sleepy that my brain and my body ain't working together. I've done that before I mean..." You wondered out loud.

There's only little time left for us.

Do not let go of that hand, at all costs.

Your sleepy eyes widened when your hand, completely out of control, started to reach for the hand that was appearing in the mirror.

"Marie? Are you doing this shit?" You screamed, at this volume, people outside would surely hear you and start rushing in right?

"Marie?" Your voice faltered.

"I- should've waited for Marie..." You whispered, your consciousness fading away as the hand in the mirror grasped yours...

"Marie...find...me"

To be continued...

[garak-pussy-indulgence]

Hi. Tumnlr user Garak Pussy Indulgence here.

now that I have your attention please please please listen to me abt my Primary Interest that is far too niche for my liking:

Deep Love: A Ghostly Rock Opera is best described as a concert with a story. Though it has a plot, and 4 characters, the experience is far closer to a live rock concert than musical theater. It follows a ghost known as Old Bones, who becomes jealous when his living wife Constance tries to move on and find love again with another man named Friedrich. Shit goes downhill very quickly because of this, especially when Friedrich's jealous ex Florence gets involved in all the nonsense. By nonsense I mean literally everyone ends up dead. 💀

What started as a bitter vent project by two college students about how much love sucks, has now become a nation-touring, noggin-gripping, beloved experience by many. The appeal is that everyone is so so cool and hot, and it offers 4 blorbos to take your pick from! As well as the full rock band, onstage the whole time behind the characters. You can also love them too if you like. I sure do.

There's no spoken dialogue, the whole show is told through song. That sounded stupid when I first heard it. It is not. It's actually the best thing I've ever seen.

Just like Rocky Horror Picture Show, simply listening to the music doesn't compare to actually seeing it live. Fans dress as their favorite characters, do little rituals at certain points in the show, (there's a thing with Peeps I'm trying to make work), and especially at smaller shows, the interaction between characters and audience is HIGH. You might get a gentle hand kiss if you're annoying enough.

^if you wish this was you, I can help.

Personally I've been following this show since I was 13, and you'd be surprised how many aspects of my personality and daily life can be traced directly back to Deep Love. Because it's such a fundamental part of me, I'd love ppl to understand wtf I'm talking about. But literally nobody has heard of it. I'm here throwing fanart out into the void. Maybe you could be the one to take this journey with me.

Also they're releasing an official album on streaming, possibly this October. If you can't wait, there ARE older live recordings available!

I can help you. Let me help you. I'm so so fucking serious. Ask me about this. Thanks.

[mylifeisjustafeverdream]

A Retelling of My Mind Whilst Reading Shadow Kissed-

Omg it's the Sixth Sense up in this bitch

Bitch when are you ever "just tired" when weird shit starts happening to you, I swear to fuck.

Rose is so me because I too would rather die than spend an extended amount of time with my best friends boyfriend.

Eddie Castile the man that you are.

From the bottom of my heart I hope Jesse gets his shit rocked.

Omg Rose girl do something, ANYTHING. YOU'RE EMBARRASSING US.

Least Favorite Trope: Entire plot would be resolved if this dumbass just like communicated the issues she is having OMFG.

If Rose Hathaway has no haters all her teachers must be dead because wtf is their issue???

Homegirl is unstable at best.

I feel like at this point she should probably go to where Mason the Friendly Ghost is pointing.

Girly-pop that's not a migraine....

I do not fucking trust that bitch Tatianna

*Viktor explains master plan* "Cool motive still murder"

*Law and Order sounds*

HE JUST SAID THAT SHIT IN OPEN COURT IT'S ON THE RECORD

How much of an asshole do you have to be that it's more believable that you're lying than a crime having actually happened lol

Lissa is so clueless it's kinda funny.

You know what I hope Rose fucks Adrienne and gets pregnant just to spite Tatianna.

She wants her nails done omg she's just a girl 🥺

*starts looking at my tarot book to see if this is accurate*

I love when Dimitri starts lore dropping to Rose

Well.... I think they know about the ghosts now.

That doctor is the only rational adult at the school cause literally why tf didn't she talk to a counselor.

Her therapist just clocked her so hard.

Well that's an unfortunate fact about Shadow Kissed Anna

Dimitri took part in that attack exercise specifically so she would hop on it lmao

Can't even celebrate for a moment before Lissa is off doing something dumb I swear to god

Lissa try not to get tortured challenge go

*New power unlocked*

YES ROSE BEAT HIS ASS GIRL......oh shit.....GIRL YOU GOT HIM IT'S GOOD.

She's like a feral cat.... Dimitri should use a spray bottle.

Oh my GOD IT'S HAPPENING EVERYONE REMAIN FUCKING CALM

Girl you gotta give me more details than that PLEASE

"My body ached" that'll happen when your first time is with a 6'7 Russian built like a tank

CAN WE NOT HAVE ONE GOD DAMN MOMENT OF PEACE

Girl I'm gonna throw up he's all alone out there.

CHRISTIAN OZERA THE MAN THAT YOU ARE

HE DIDN'T DIE THANK FUCK

Mason upstaging Dimitri even from the afterlife that's my man right there.

SECRET TUNNELS, SECRET TUNNELS THROUGH THE MOUNTAINS

The uncanny ability that 17 year old female herions have to radicalize societies is amazing

Do y'all think Dimitri came up with that life plan while he was fighting the strigoi?

"You're scared of my mother" um yea girl she's fs going to catch an attempted murder charge once she finds out.

*Clenched my jaw so tight during the cave fight it started to hurt*

Oh my God girl stop internal monologuing about how everything is going to work out THAT ALWAYS GOES POORLY

Oh God it's that blonde bitch from earlier this is going to be so much worse than him being dead.

Rose: *literally tries to throw herself back into a vicious attack just to save Dimitri's body*

Everyone Else: She just respected him as a teacher so much there's no other possible explanation.

Lissa clocking what was happening with Rose and Dimitri just now is like when someone steals the answer on Wheel of Fortune after the other contestant mispronounced the phrase

*Knows it's definitely going to happen* "Dimitri is a strigoi"*gasps*

I'm shocked they didn't grab like a single Guardian teacher to try and talk down Rose like why tf did they think Kirova would have any affect.

I know it's not malicious on Lissa's part but I'm glad Rose is finally speaking about how one sided this relationship is.

"Off to kill the man I love" oh this next book is going to fuck me up.

[polyhexian]

Collected thoughts on the Grimwalker Ghost Zone:

Poor Caleb's experience as a dead person is just. Not normal.

Most dead people are gonna keep an eye on their friends, their kids, their grandkids, and MAYBE their great-grandkids. And then there's no direct ties left to worry so much about the living anymore and you can get on with your afterlife.

And then we have Caleb.

So it's like. The average dead person keeps an eye on the living for 100 years after their death, at most. Caleb Wittebane, who's been cloned 200 times in the last four centuries and feels personally responsible for his still-living brother trying to enact a genocide--

In undefined characters-watching-from-the-afterlife scenarios I usually default the watching happening via TV unless stated otherwise. But it's TOH so I'm imagining Caleb slouched on the couch in front of a big crystal ball. He's not alone of course, Evelyn is there, she checks on him often like, uh. hey sweetie. you doing okay?

Caleb: Evie, meet Virtue! HE ONLY LASTED 11 MONTHS

Evelyn: …you know you COULD stop paying attention to--

Caleb: NO I CAN'T

Evelyn: *sigh* No, you can't.

And of course all the Grimwalkers are there, cuz, like. Where else are they gonna go? They barely had lives, wtf are they gonna do with their afterlives? Might as well wait for Belos to croak, they'll figure out what to do next AFTER they've gotten some closure.

So they're all just in this house together. It's the afterlife, stuff just gets provided, and the afterlife saw fit to provide them with a big stupid house. There's plenty of space and the crystal ball somehow gets repaired every time it suffers an anger-induced shattering and the liquor cabinet is always well-stocked.

Caleb's watching the living with the same energy as someone who's been watching a show since its premiere, but then the writing started going downhill and the plot jumped the shark and now they can't STOP watching because they intend to see this through to the bitter and disappointing end. When he first died he was so upset he refused to even THINK about Philip for a decade and just paid attention to his wife and kid. At some point he checked on Philip out of morbid curiosity, which led to morbid realization, which led to him thinking he should check on Philip more. And then there's clones and this Collector kid and Philip is obviously planning SOMETHING and then Evelyn dies of old age but Philip apparently has no intentions of dying anytime soon and then Caleb's KID is dead and Philip is still alive and Caleb's GRANDKIDS are dead but Philip isn't and there's been 20 Grimwalkers so far and Philip shows no signs of stopping either living OR making and killing Grimwalkers and OH MY GOD WHAT IS HAPPENING??

When Evelyn dies she's so ready for her reunion with Caleb. "I'm so glad I can finally rest in peace with my beloved--Caleb what are you doing?"

He's standing in front of a conspiracy board like "Philip's spent the last few decades cloning me and killing the clones and I don't like where it's going."

Evelyn: What. WHAT? Philip's ALIVE? I haven't seen him since he killed you, how the fuck has nothing eaten him??

Caleb: Btw meet Caleb 2, Hunter, Hunter 2, Hunter 3, and Nameless Vivisection Experiment (he's working on a name).

Assorted Grimwalkers: *awkward wave?*

Evelyn: CALEB WHAT?

Caleb's just like, Evie, you have no idea how glad I am you fell off Philip's radar, we're lucky all he did was steal my corpse. I'm being completely serious, unfortunately.

And then the Grimwalkers start coming and they don't stop coming, and they're just stuck in this together because what ELSE are they gonna do? Caleb staring at the crystal ball like "This is Hell. The Puritans were right. Hell exists, and this is it." Evelyn's like "Hell isn't a place, dear. It's just a situation. Our neighbors are resting in so much peace, they'd probably think they're in your Heaven if they knew what that was!"

Everyone isn't watching at all times, cuz that'd be ridiculous. It's kinda like when you're having a party for a sports game, not everyone's paying attention to the TV. You'll have people hanging out chatting and eating and chilling and then there are the people who are intensely paying attention to the game.

Caleb's the one intensely paying attention. Everyone else kinda pops up like "so is he dead yet? is he close to being dead yet? no? bummer. who's this? nice to meet you Virtue. 11 months? yikes"

And it's not like it's just them! It's the afterlife, everyone else who's ever died is perfectly capable of dropping by for a visit. Not that many people do, because the Grimwalker Ghost Zone has a bit of a…reputation. Like. Those people are NOT having a normal afterlife. Let's just. Leave them be.

Sometimes the Witteclaw kid comes to visit. Hi Mom! Hi various tragic brother/uncles (brouncles?) who are literally and figuratively younger than me! Oh, hey new guy, welcome! 11 months? Yikes. Hope you're settling in alright! Mom, what state should I expect Dad to be in when I go say hi? Last time he was manically planning which part of his brother he was going to punch first upon arrival. Ah, depressive episode? Got it, I'll be gentle.

Evelyn's family come to visit like yeesh you and Caleb are still paying attention to the living? It's been like. 400 years. No one stays this invested this long.

Caleb, gesturing at the CB: MY BROTHER IS STILL ALIVE AND IS LITERALLY BEATING A CLONE OF ME AT THIS VERY MOMENT

Relatives: Okay but have you considered, like. getting over it.

They're not even wrong. Continuing to watch the living for this long is, like, the same energy as keeping tabs on your high school friends that you haven't spoken to in 30 years. This isn't healthy. You need better hobbies. Okay it's KIND OF understandable since Caleb's brother and clones are involved, but like. You realize this is entirely optional, right?

Evelyn: Caleb, honey, please, you PROMISED we could have dinner with my parents tonight.

Caleb: ENOCH JUST KILLED A BIRD WITH HER BARE HANDS

Evelyn: We've all killed birds with our bare hands, darling. Come put your shoes on.

When Tell pops up he turns out to be just as invested as Caleb is, on account of the wife and kid situation. So Caleb actually has consistent company for 15 years while they both basically live through the same hell.

Tell walks into the kitchen for a beer and finds Caleb face-down on the floor and Tell's like "what's up man" and Caleb's like "Virtue died" and Tell is like "isn't he like eleven months" and Caleb just nods and Tell's like "cool I'm gonna go meet him" and just leaves Caleb on the floor. Caleb's like "wait didn't you hate him" and Tell's like "yeah but I mean. he doesn't know that."

At some point someone tells Virtue "Y'know Tell literally hated you" (Miles? my money's on Miles) and it starts a whole sibling fight that Evelyn has to break up.

"MILES SAID TELL HATED ME!"

"I didn't hate you I just hated the idea of you! It wasn't personal!"

"Yeah he was always really smug when another Grimwalker would rot in the ground."

"MILES DON'T TELL HIM THAT!"

Caitlyn and Dust die and Dust is like "what is WRONG with your daughter?" and Tell is like "ouch, but fair" and Virtue's like "she probably gets her penchant for not caring about Grimwalkers FROM HER DAD" and Tell is like "HEY." At this rate Caleb's gonna be the first dead person to have an aneurysm.

Evelyn's just glad to have Caitlyn around. Sure, she's dealing with the shock of her death after over a decade of dissociating, but Evelyn's just like FINALLY, someone who isn't a Grimwalker, and she's family to boot!

Caitlyn: Wait, family? I guess you look like a Clawthorne but I've never heard of you. How are we related?

Evelyn: Haha well I'm your many-great-grandma who Belos had very personal beef with 400 years ago and I may or may not be the reason why he decided to enact his sick game of house with you. I would say I'm sorry but literally none of this is my fault.

Caitlyn: Oh my god.

Evelyn: Haha yeah watching you and Enoch over the last 12 years has been extremely horrifying on a deeply personal level. What's your favorite alcohol? I promise we have it.

When Enoch dies Tell's like "well it was nice hanging out Caleb, thanks for all the screaming sessions, I'm gonna go get some quality time with my dead family now, peace" and Caleb's just like haha cool. fine. GLAD YOU CAN FINALLY REST IN PEACE, TELL. how many of my bones are left? there's no way this can continue after they're all used up, right? They're down to a ribcage and he's counting down the ribs.

Jasper dies and gets greeted by Tell who's like "howdy, normally our ortet would greet you but he's a little busy dealing with emotions right now"--*muffled screaming down the hall*--"so it was decided I'd be the best one to explain things since we've got some things in common." Jasper's kinda dazed like "uh…I didn't really think anyone was gonna greet me" and Tell's like "HAHA YEAH none of us ever do."

Jasper becomes just as invested as Caleb is and Tell used to be, because Hunter. So Caleb has a new bingewatching buddy! Yay?

Belos: *about to punish Hunter*

Caleb: *dragging Jasper away* Y'know what, you don't need to see this, let's go outside and get some air or something--

Evelyn: WHAT'S THAT, CALEB? YOU THINK IT'S GOOD TO TAKE A BREAK FROM WATCHING THINGS THAT UNNECESSARILY TRAUMATIZE YOU??

At some point Manny Noceda shows up, all cheerful and polite on the doorstep like "Hi! I heard there might be some people here who're watching someone who's involved in my daughter's life? She kinda stumbled into your world, see, and I was thinking--"

Evelyn's just blocking the doorway staring at him like "Listen. Before I let you in here. I NEED to make sure you understand the centuries of bullshit you're about to step into."

"Haha yeah I get it, family drama sure is--"

"SIR NO YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THIS."

Manny thinks he understands what he's getting into. Manny does NOT understand what he's getting into. Manny takes it in stride and enjoys these people's company anyway. Evelyn is happy to have another person around who she can count on to not be a constant mess. Manny/Evelyn BFFs 4afterlyfe.

Of course Manny also now has a VERY in-depth understanding of the 4-century clusterfuck Luz has gotten tangled up in and that is. Kinda anxiety-inducing. But like, he's pretty sure she's got this! That's his daughter! She's genre savvy, she'll be alright! Even if this situation is…way more horrifying than he realized at first.

His own dead relatives call him up like "Hey Manny! How's the watch party going? Luz still in that weird fantasy world she discovered? She having fun living out her own personal adventure story?"

Manny thinks about that time last week when Caleb and several Grimwalkers got drunk and tried to make a definitive list of the Top 5 Worst Things Belos Has Done and half of the entries were 3-way ties and there were WAY too many Honorary Mentions, and he just forces a grin and goes "Yep! Luz is doing great! She's having a blast! My new friends are super cool!"

"Oh, that's great! Could we meet th--"

"NO."

Manny tries to find things to do with his weird new friends but like. He's a 21st century sci-fi nerd. He has no idea how to relate to 400-year-old witches. But he thinks, well, I lived in New England, and Caleb lived in New England. So he's like "hey do you guys wanna do Thanksgiving together?"

Thanksgiving wasn't an official holiday until the 1800s, but Caleb knows what a feast of thanksgiving is, it's even a Puritan-approved party (ie the Pilgrims) that they'd do when they wanted to show God their gratitude! So he's just like, Manny. WTF. This is NOT the time.

Manny: Well, I mean, we're halfway through October so now's the time to start planning--

Caleb, gesturing to Belos gooping on various woodland critters: YOU THINK THIS IS WORTHY OF GIVING THANKS FOR???

By the time Luz becomes relevant, EVERYONE has started watching religiously. This is like. The final minutes of the big sports game. The series finale of their lives. But after Belos is dead (and summarily punched by everyone) most of the Grimwalkers stop paying any attention to the CB at all. Like. There's nothing else tying them to the living now. Whew. Cool. Vengeance is had! No need to pay attention to the living world ever again!

Except Jasper, of course, who figures he's just gonna watch Hunter by himself.

And then Caleb collapses next to him on the couch with snacks like "sup" and Jasper's like "oh, you uh, you wanna keep watching with me?" and Caleb's like "I suffered through four centuries of this, what's one more? and after watching every season of my brother's bullshit Grimwalker Trauma And Murder Show, I deserve to watch one of you live a decent life in the infinitely happier sequel series"

Manny's like "Yeah I'll stick around too, it looks like Luz is gonna be spending a LOT of time in your world and I'm really gonna need people to explain things to me. Anyway, I know this is a little late, but things have calmed down now and we have time since it's still just the START of November, so…Thanksgiving?"

And Caleb looks at Hunter, alive and free on the CB, and then glances out the window where Enoch is kicking the shit out of Belos in the backyard, and says, "Alright, yes, a celebration is in order. This is indeed worthy of thanksgiving."

"Oh, awesome! Uh…important question, what kind of cranberry sauce do you like?"

"What the fuck is cranberry sauce?"

JFJEJAJJFJRJWIFF ABSOLUTELY LOSING IT OVER ALL OF THIS

I feel like miles is back there too if only because he and Enoch are nasty little rude children and friends because of it.

Also don't forget flapjack AND hawk hunter are there. Flapjack sitting on Caleb's head and pulling his hair until he passes him a piece of popcorn or a peanut. All of them going completely apeshit for hunters first kiss. Camila appreciation club. Jasper and Manny both delighted by the fact Camila being mother to their child makes them like. Fathers in law? Mutuals? Proxy???? Something. there's a kinship there and it's funny. Hunter carves waffles and flapjack gets so excited he flies into the TV and knocks himself out

[kab00m]

i am a firm believer that ghost always under reacts about Very Serious Things and freaks everybody else out because of it

soap, trying to chat to ghost after they wrap up a mission: —crazy right? and after that he—hey are u even listening to me? wtf

ghost, whose eyes have not been on soap once since he started talking: i’m listening. i’m just also hallucinating my dead family in that corner over there at the same time. i can multitask

soap, Extremely Concerned: ?????????

ghost, now swaying: yea one of them jabbed me with a hallucinogenic. don’t worry, i slit his throat

soap:

ghost: don’t look at me like that, i can handle it. it was only one syringe

soap:

———————

like imagine 141 post-mission, all sitting quietly in their exfil vehicle and then ghost suddenly sighs extremely loudly

ghost: ugh

price: what, simon??

ghost, peeved: my rib just punctured my lung

everyone:

ghost: :/

price, going into cardiac arrest, so tired of simon’s shit:

[manwiththemagic]

spn s1 ep3 "Dead in the water"

more rewatch notes/commentary I have while watching!! :9

Ew Wisconsin okay...

“guys don't like buff girls.” WHO ASKED?? dumbahh person of the week. I don't even REMEMBER this episode and honestly, I blame you pal. I. Blame. You.

“be careful.” Okay so she's going to die then.

I wish I lived on a lake :(((

HELP THE SLOWMO... uhhh rip girl?? Ig..

Why does Dean look actually insane. He has like 100 newspapers, and his scribbling out faces and circling others 😭😭 i'd call the cops tbh..

Episode three, and second chick we see hitting on dean. It's just bc of his long eyelashes I bet.

LMAO “can I... get you anything else? 😏” “just the check please ☺️” LOVE YOU SAM.

The way dean immediately gives up trying to convince Sam about hookups bc lil bro is still distraught about jess. Like yeah... no way is a hookup gonna seem "fun" to a grieving man

The side eye Sam gives dean when he's telling him about how the people had a funeral for a missing person.

“a funeral?” “yeah for closure or whatever” “closure? What closure. People don't just disappear Dean, others just stop looking for them.” WOAH NELLY... I get it. Bro wants to find dad, dad to find monster, monster to be KKKKKKKKKILLED‼️

vaild.

Okay so Sam is tweaking because he wants to find John, and Dean is— NO WAY HE JUST SAID THAT. “im sick of the attitude.” DAD DEAN CHAT!! also no way he pulled the "I've been with him everyday for the past two years while you were off at school—" BRO.

Great more depressed. old. MEN.

does the loch ness monster exist?

Oh shoot broke dam!! More like... Dam I'm BROKE!!

Dean being good with kids part 1!! Also this is why I have a hard time believing he's so bad with Jack like... LOOK ST THIS.

Dean and his 3 woman in three episodes.

“must be hard with your sense of direction.. trying to find your way to a decent pickup line.” HEYOOOOO!! she ate that.

“‘i love kids’?? You don't even like kids.” “yes I do!” “name 3 kids that you even know.” LMAO NOT SAM GATEKEEPING KIDS LIKE ITS AN INDIE BAND!!! also yes he likes kids, he literally raised you Sam wtfdym?

Wait so late monsters do exist?? THE LOCH NESS IS CANON?? just not here..? Damn I thought since bigfoot was fake that would be too.

I'm pretty sure it's some ghost chick.

Yikes more dead...

“no wonder that kid was so freaked out, watching one of your parents die isn't something you just get over..” DEAN :((( I always forget he watched Mary die, cause like Sam too, he just doesn't remember it.

Dean is so good with kids :(((

STOP THEY'RE SO CUTE.

“when I was your age I saw something... anyways..” FUCK.

DWAHHH LUCAS TAKING THE PICTURE DEAN DREW ☹️

AWH HE GAVE DEAN A PICTURE!! they made a connection.

Oh shoot.. that man is so dead. “im gonna make some dinner”

OH SHIT ITS IN THE PIPES

your dead kid. D E A D. IDC tho you ain't Lucas

Ew don't dig in the dirty water. HOLY SHIT HE DROWBING. HE DROWBNIN

Damn.. and in dirty water. I could never.

Bill Carlton is cooked. Literally everyone he knows is dead now.. like damn. Wtf did he DO.

“my children are gone..its worse than dying..” MORE SAD OLD MEN OMFG.

Lucas drawing is important!!

Why don't these people ever be like “yea.. serial killer man..” LIKE A BELIEVABLE BUT STILL CRAZY LIE. "Why the FBI here?" "Serial killer." ITS THAT EASY.

Dean getting help from a kid AHHHHHHHH!!

“your... scared..? I understand.. you see when I was your age, I saw something real bad happen to my mom, and I was scared too.. I didn't feel like talking, just like you. But see my mom.. I know she wanted me to be brave. I think about that every day.” FUCK. JUST TEAR AT MY HEART STRINGS THEN DEAN. “and I do my best to be brave.. and maybe your dad wants you to be brave too.”

LUCAS YOU THE GOAT!!!

so now they are looking for the house Lucas drew and Dean like "man where tf is it?" And Sam's like "uh.. maybe let's look for the church?"

“ohhh collage boy thinks he's so smart!!” Dean the goat of this episode

Sam twitching because he doesn't know if or how he should bring up deans speech. Honestly now that I think about it Sam digs into deans personal stuff alot, mostly because Dean is jaded and hides stuff but IDK it's interesting.

“oh God we're not gonna have to hug or anything are we?” like you wouldn't enjoy that..

The churchhhhh

OMG THE BIKE. IT WAS BIG IN A DIFF DRAWING AND HERE IT IS AGAIN. omg wait it is important.

He's missing.. the kid with the bike.

HOLY COW. all the parents talking about how losing a kid is worse than death, and hey I know what canonically happens in death and uhh, idk if your right about that. Hell? eck.. ghost life?? yikes.. heaven? good but.. mehh...

Rip lil kid. Rip

HE KNEW BILLY. holy cow. Dead kid knew billy. Billy Carlton knows something is going on?? WAIT WHATS HAPOENING.

So wait is the dead kid the ghost..?

HOLY COW THAT BOAT FLEWWWW!!

Lucas having another vision??.. OH SHIT YEA THE GHOST GIES AFTER HIS MOM OR SMTH RIGHT??

THIRD TIME GETTING CAUGHT LMAOOO. “and your not really wildlife service..” HELP.

this cop made sus. Why you so mad these guys are investigating a murder?? They weird but like..

LUCAS KNOWSSSS..

This is kinda like a call forward or uhh foreshadowing to Sam's visions, which is kinda dope

LADY DON'T TAKE THAT BATH. NOT JUST CAUSE I DONT WANNA SEE YOU NAKED..

deans going back to town even after being threaten because lil kid was scared. GOAT. the goat I tell you.

“who are you and what have you done with my brother??” it's really not out of character for him Sam😭

DON'T TAKE THAT BATH LADY. YOUR DEAD. DOOMED.

oh whatever. I give up. EW MURKY WATER. CAN'T YOU FEEL IT LADY.

poor lucas.. lil bro bouta become an orphan.

LMAO DEAN THREW LUCAS OUTTA THE WAY. and Sam actually saved her 🤷

So wtf is after them. I DON'T REMEMBER.

Oh shoot puppy dog eyes Sam is back. “tell me what happened. Everything. 🥺”

More Lucas visions..

THEY FOUND THE BODY. or no? THE BIKE.

THE SHERIFF DID WHAT NOW.

No dead ghost Peter LEAVE LUCAS ALONEE!!

oh shit he did kill someone.

OH SHIT.

YOU WERE A BULLY?? EE. I HATE YOU. YOU KULLED HOM?? WTF.

dude no your daughter should stay away from you you freak.

LUCAS IS DROWNING.

Mermaid Dean 🧜

Sacrifice yourself for Lucas? Valid sheriff. Valid.

WOOO ITS OVERRRR!! MYSTERY SSSSOLVED!!

AW LUCAS IS TALKING AGAINNN!!

Dean teaching random kid his morals and tastes in music LMAO.

dean pulls yet NAOTHER woman. Are you fr?

One of my least favorite episodes tbh..