#like I remember at the time thinking there was going to be some point as to why the wizarding world was at turn of the century tech
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"Is this always how they act?" Jonathan asks. He has to lean close and yell a little for Robin to hear him over the noise of the house party.
"Yup," she says.
She, Jonathan, and Argyle continue to stare at Eddie, sitting in an easy chair, Steve perched happily on his lap. Eddie has a whole bowl of bbq Lay's, and Steve will lean back for a chip, which Eddie feeds him with a smile.
"And they're definitely not dating?" Argyle asks when Steve leans back to whisper in Eddie's ear, mouth pressed close. It's deeply gratifying that they just got in from California and already they see it.
"Steve says no."
"You think he's lying?" Jonathan asks.
"I think he doesn't realize he likes Eddie yet."
Eddie tugs at Steve's hair, and Steve turns back, gives him a smile that's so intimate Robin can't stare directly at it. Instead, she turns to her friends, but Argyle is still watching Eddie and Steve. He's drumming his fingers against his chin, expression what Robin could only call mischievous.
"What are you planning?" Jonathan asks.
"Just helping some bros find true love."
Jonathan looks mildly concerned but before he can say anything, Nancy makes her appearance. And they're something, becoming something, and she cares about Eddie and Steve getting their shit together, but Nancy is smiling and she's so, so pretty. It's easy to get lost in the blue of her eyes and the sweep of her hair and forget about everything else.
---
A few hours later and they're all sitting around a coffee table in the basement, just the six of them. It's sort of funny, she thinks, how it always ends up being the six of them.
They're crossfaded already, but that hasn't stopped Eddie and Argyle from lighting another joint. Her thoughts have gone light and floaty, all that's holding her to earth the press Steve's leg and Nancy's hand against hers.
Argyle is sort of monologuing and she doesn't think any of them are paying much mind, but then he stops mid-sentence, grips Jonathan's shoulder tight enough that his knuckles go white. "Dudes. What if we played Truth or Dare?"
Nancy snorts. "Not on your life."
"I don't think I can move?" She says. She leans into Steve, sighing with contentment.
"I, for one, would love to see Buckley complete a dare," Eddie says.
She sticks her tongue out at him. "I've done plenty. Band kid, remember?"
"Ugh, curse the horny trumpeters." Eddie slumps on the coffee table in defeat.
"I'll have you know, they were very wholesome games."
Steve squints at her. "Wasn't there an orgy in someone's pool?"
She sniffs, looks away instead of answering, which makes everyone laugh.
"Speaking of sex," Argyle says. "No one catch your eye tonight, Harrington?"
"Wasn't really looking."
"That's new," Jonathan says.
Steve laughs. "I'm tired of hooking up."
He's told her that too, countless times. She thinks the real reason he hasn't dated in months is sitting right next to him, drumming his fingers on the coffee table.
"Maybe you've just lost your touch," Argyle says.
"I have not!" Steve clutches a hand over his heart. "If I wanted to, I could pull any girl upstairs."
"C'mon, my dude, no way you're that good."
"I was!" He looks to Robin, Nancy, Jonathan. "I was, back me up!"
"I don't know, Scoops wasn't your best work," she says.
"No, no, we said Scoops doesn't count! It was the hat. The outfit! I did fine after!"
"I happened to think the sailor costume was very cute," Eddie says.
"Thank you," Steve preens. He shifts away from her to lean into Eddie, who grins.
"I don't think we can trust Eddie's judgement here," Nancy says.
Steve points at her. "Yes, and I remember you being totally uninterested."
She squeaks in indignation, Robin smothering her own giggles behind her hand. "It was--it was hormones!"
"Yeah, very uninterested in me." Jonathan chimes in. There's a little second where no one reacts--the fact that Nancy was technically still with Steve when that happened ringing unspoken between them--before Nancy and Steve start to giggle.
"I've hooked up with everyone I've ever tried to," Argyle chimes in, nonchalant.
"No way," the whole group says.
"I've got the touch."
"C'mon, that literally can't be true just by like...stats," Steve says.
"Don't know what to tell you, my dude." Argyle's smile is smug. "I'm really good."
"You're just jealous," she tells him. She nudges his shoulder so he knows she's joking.
"No! Jealousy has nothing to do with it."
They erupt at that, calling out the obvious lie.
"I'm not upset!" Steve shouts over them. "I'm just saying, it didn't happen. Sorry, Argyle. You have bizzaro charm, but there's no way it has a 100% success rate."
"Sounds like jealousy to me, Stevie." Eddie cocks his head with a smirk.
"Harrington, you're so cute when you're competitive," Argyle says. "Anyway, it worked on--"
"Don't say Jonathan," Nancy, Steve, and Robin all say.
"Hey! Why not me?'
"Well, it's just--" Nancy waves her hand in the air. "You're. I mean. It's not hard."
Jonathan groans, hides his face in his hands as they laugh.
"I'll prove it to you," Argyle says to Steve. "100% success rate."
"What?"
"I'm going to seduce you."
"Oh, shit," she says.
She knows what's going to happen even before Steve puts his hands on his hips, awkwardly cause they're sitting, cocks an eyebrow, and says, "Okay."
Eddie grumbles something she can't make out, but Steve shakes his head, laughs. "Nah, it's just for fun, right?"
"Until it works." Argyle tosses his hair.
Steve rolls his eyes. "Gimme your best shot."
They rearrange around the table, Eddie and Argyle swapping places.
Everyone is quiet for a second, Steve reaches for his drink. "You got great hands, Harrington," Argyle says.
"I--oh, what?" Steve splutters. He goes a little pink, and Robin thinks it's the first time she's seen him this flustered by a compliment.
"Yeah." Argyle takes his hand, traces along his palm and knuckles. "Big. Strong. Like you could really take care of someone."
Eddie kicks the table, sending it rocking, scattering empty cups and chip bags. Steve is crimson, totally oblivious to Eddie's flailing.
"Thanks," he mumbles. He doesn't pull his hand away. Robin, everyone, is riveted.
"No one's ever told you that?"
"No. No one."
"That's too bad. It's probably all about your hair and your eyes and your body."
Steve smiles and it's one she recognizes, flirty and a little wicked. "You noticed my body?"
Argyle laughs. "Oh, c'mon, you know everyone notices that."
"Would you believe it if I told you I don't get enough compliments?"
"Not on your life."
Steve leans into him, giggles. "Well, worth a shot, right?"
"Always. You wanna know the first thing I noticed about you?"
"Ass, right?"
"It was how much you love your friends but you hide it behind a facade of disapproval. Made me think maybe you weren't used to the love you want to give being reciprocated."
They're all locked in on Argyle and Steve, but she notices Eddie flinch, move like he's about to stand, Nancy reaching out to stop him. She thinks, then, for the first time, that maybe this is mean to him. He doesn't know it's not real.
"Oh," Steve says. His voice breaks, a little, and her heart breaks for him. "I--oh."
"Your ass was the second thing I noticed," Argyle quips and the tension around the table breaks, Steve giggling.
With smooth confidence she never would have expected him to possess, Argyle cards his fingers through Steve's hair. "Just had to touch it for myself." His voice is soft.
"That all you want to touch?"
Argyle grins. "Not even a little bit."
She watches, stunned, as Steve leans in, face almost touching Argyle's. Eddie makes a noise, a pained cough, and Steve leaps to his feet.
"I can't kiss you!" He half-yells, stumbling.
"And why not?" Argyle asks. He's got a wild smile on his face.
"I'm in love with Eddie!" Steve's eyes are wide, panicked.
"I'm sorry," Steve says to him. "Eddie, I--"
But before he can get the words out, Eddie's climbing over the coffee table, sending drinks and snacks flying, the calls for him to get down ignored as he trips into Steve's arms.
"You love me?" Eddie asks.
"I'm sorry I couldn't say it before. I--got in my head about it and I--I hoped it didn't seem like I was leading you on because my words kept getting stuck, and--"
"Sweetheart." Eddie stops him. "I--" He breaks off, notices that the rest of them are raptly listening to the confession. "Do you want to go somewhere we can talk?"
They disappear upstairs, and she turns to Argyle in awe. "I can't believe that actually worked."
"What can I say, I'm a miracle worker. Are there more Doritos?"
---
Early in the morning, they're piled in Nancy's station wagon, Jonathan driving them home. She and Nancy are in the middle seat, Steve and Eddie in the back. Steve's curled against him, face pressed to his neck, hidden by a cloud of hair. She wants to ask what happened, how their conversation went, if they're official and how long Steve's known he's in love, but Nancy moves closer, head dropping to Robin's shoulder. Their fingers entwine and Robin closes her eyes, smiles.
"Tomorrow?" Nancy asks.
She nods. "Tomorrow."
#steddie#steve x eddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#spicy six#robin pov#light ronance#light jargyle#romcom#fluff#oblivious steve harrigton#pining eddie munson#banter#feelings confession#getting together#inspired by the friends episode the one where everybody finds out#they don't know that we know they know we know#robin buckley#nancy wheeler#argyle#jonathan byers
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nsfw themes, eighteen+
gymrat!vi who frequents the gym every day except for sundays. giving into his wishes to be present for their weekly dinner. any other day? she’s getting her pump in. an absolute given in her world. pink-hued strands stick to her scalp as she pushes for a new personal record on the bench, especially when vi’s bulking. whenever she’s training, she’s so zoned in, nothing can distract — well — it used to be nothing.
gymrat!vi who secretly enjoys nothing more than working out with jayce. accountability between two best friends turns into a friendly competition. nothing at stake except their egos. seeing who can outdo the other set after set. something to keep them both in line, fit, and violet enjoys the hit to jayce’s ego whenever she can push weight heavier than jayce.
gymrat!vi who isn’t oblivious to the attention thrown her way. with the heatwave of summertime, her muscles are on full display, defined biceps, toned thighs, and god her tattoos are basically a honey-trap. she would be a fucking liar if she acted disgusted by it, part of her likes it a little too much. but hey, everyone likes to be appreciated from time to time and vi is no exception. and she never really saw a problem with it until a one night stand who then not not so subtly stalked her every time she was in the gym, learning her schedule until she had no choice but to leave her favorite gym. silently, she made a vow to not fuck with girls she met at the gym.
….well, until you.
gymrat!vi who is a known regular. she knows all the girls at the front desk, flirts with many of them, but to her it’s as platonic as chatting up the barista who brews her dose of caffeine in the morning. it’s ingrained into her morning routine, simply just a part of who she is. so, when she sees you at the front desk she nearly has to do a double take. there’s not a hot chance in hell she’s seen you before — vi would have definitely remembered you.
gymrat!vi who becomes shy for the first time in her life, bringing her membership card up to the scanner and offering a small smile but when looks back you seem to take a second look, eyes locked into her powder-blue eyes. even if just for a moment, you’re veering into her thumping soul. vi can’t help but smile. she reminds herself, you’re just another pretty girl. you’re new, probably won’t even last long. yeah, that’s what vi’s going to let herself believe. it’s not like she’s thinking about your gorgeous lips when she bench presses, or thinking about your gorgeous eyes taking her breath away — or when vi’s powerlifting she’s so not thinking about lifting you on top of her.
“if you talk to her, she might actually know your name.”
“w-what, i-i’m not, sh—”
jayce raises his eyebrows at vi, shaking his head as his very questionable friend spots her as she moves the weight the fluidity, her movements only struggling to push through when she reaches the final set.
“she’s the gym owner’s daughter, he’s wanting her to take over the reins, old age and all.” jayce responds as violet places the bar on the rack, her set complete until she moves onto the next one. “your little theory of her not being around for long is kinda crushed. unless you want to find another gym….”
“that’s the whole point of me not talking to her, m’not finding a new gym again. that’s a promise. i can control myself.”
jayce just laughs. fucking laughs.
“what’s so funny, bro?” vi pouts.
“that you genuinely believe you’re gonna be able to stop yourself and that you think you have a type….and she fits the bill.”
“oh, fuck off.” vi grunts.
dropping the fifty pound dumbbells by the bench, lifting up her shirt to wipe some of the sweat off her face only to find you on the other side of the gym, staring directly at her abs like her glistening sweaty skin like it’s a golden ticket to heaven.
“well…fuck.”
gymrat!vi who notices your presence more and more in the coming weeks. this time not just behind the front counter. you’re with the personal trainers, helping new customers fill out paperwork, and this morning you go wherever vi goes, her eyes can’t seem to stop searching for your figure. especially with those tight leggings you always seem to wear, vi couldn’t stop looking at the fat of your ass if her life depended on it. she managed to squeak out more than a hi to you yesterday, but it’s as far as her pleasantries extend.
gymrat!vi who has her headphones placed on her head, her all black workout set; this time something more modest at her disposable. the black and cotton hoodie covers her head, flares of bright pink wisps shadow from the hood but her shorts reach mid thigh, the overworked muscles in her legs flexing as she lifts the weight. jayce isn’t with her today, which means she basically had to physically restrain herself from talking to you today. even if she can see you sneaking glances at her through her workout, eyeing her legs each time she’s on the leg press. greedy, hot, goddess — vi is so fucked.
when she walked the following day, you said her name, violet.
you know her name.
it’s just the database, it’s the only reason.
pull yourself together, idiot.
gymrat!viwho is at the end of her workout, taking her final rest before she does her last set, but here you go again, gawking as you pretend to be readjusting the weight on the racks but you finally stop looking at her, trying to put the last weight, the one-hundred pound bell but you just can’t. even then, vi is trying not to smile with how adorable you look as you struggle.
before making her way over to you, she slides the black pair of headphones on her tattooed neck, popping the hoodie, seeing if anyone else was going to help you — just her luck — there wasn’t a soul in her at midnight besides her….shocker.
“stupid, piece of shit, would you just—”
“need some help there, princess?” vi looks over at you from the workout beach she’s perched on, legs spread wide as her jaw juts out, eyes naturally gleaming with curiosity.
“i should be able to. i can do this, right? yeah? i definitely can do this.”
but it only sounds as if you’re trying to convince yourself. the weight of responsibility crushing your spirit by a singular dumbbell. you’re huffing and puffing. life and death here, and all because of a stupid, petty, weight.
vi stands up, her height towering over your hunched finger. “pick it up with your legs. next time, make it’ll easier.”
violet doesn’t really use her legs though. the beautifully strong woman kneels on the ground with you, her gloved hand picks the weight up with ease and places it back on the rack.
“obviously, i know that.”
violet hums before she offers a hand, helping you stand tall. “of course you do.”
the sensation bubbling on her fingertips from touching your skin almost seems downright electric — and now vi feels like running ten miles in the other direction for the sole purpose of settling her heartbeat for just a moment.
“anyways, yeah, sorry to disturb you.”
“not a problem, princess. never going to say no to a pretty girl in distress.”
the smile violet offers is adorable, the one she flashes the girls when she comes in for her late work out, from wherever she comes from. but the way she scratches the nape of her neck? that’s just for you.
gymrat!vi who can’t stop thinking of you, despite her best efforts. constantly, she wonders if you’re seeing someone, but the way you watch her, vi suspects your single as can be. it isn’t until one friday night, just as she’s trying to leave, one of the front girls, rich and pompous, is trying to coax her into meeting her and some friends at the bar tonight. when she’s about to say no for a finale time, growing more uncomfortable by the second, you’ve come up to where she is and, well fuck, violet’s even more embarrassed that one of your employees is hitting on her right in front of you.
“c’mon! jayce says you haven’t been out in ages. you deserve it, you’re always working out so much. if anyone deserves a treat, it’s you.”
cursing out the little shit in her mind, she rolls her eyes, trying to contain herself from having an aneurysm. “little shit, divulging all my secrets.”
sabrina laughs more than she should, tossing her purple hair over her shoulder. carefully, you hover, absentmindedly scrolling on your phone and violet wonders if you stay there for a reason.
if she’s the reason you’re eavesdropping.
“so….is that a yes?”
violet sighs, she hates this. “maybe another time.”
gymrat!vi who wonders what you thought of the entire time. quiet as a mouse, you hadn’t said a single word to her since you were there to witness the rejection of her employee they still couldn’t seem to just stop. this is what she wants. silence…..right? it’s what she keeps telling herself but now vi can’t stop trying to catch your attention, just an ounce of it is all she craves. today, you only spared her a glance before you talked to jayce. pathetically, she decides to do something to catch your attention, hip thrusts.
gymrat!vi who looks up as you watch her pelvis lift the weight placed on her abdomen, pushing sturdy hips through the set as you keep sparing glances gawking at her porcelain skin exposed. she can tell you’re at least trying to pay attention to whatever jayce is saying but you’re interest loses focus when she grunts with one final thrust, the bar rolling away from her legs.
“did you hear that?” vi rolls her eyes at the sound of his chipper voice.
“what?” violet slips her headphones off, trying to even her labored breaths. not just jayce, but the both of you stand above vi as she tries to catch her breath.
“i invited her to our brunch with mel on saturday.”
“oh, is that this saturday?”
oh, he really is playing fucking dirty.
“is there a problem, vi?”
little chicken shit is grinning, goddamn it. she takes another swing from her water bottle, hoping to god you’ll think it’s too forward, too weird, and you’ll just instantly decline.
“not a problem.” vi grits her teeth as she speaks, jaw clenching as she knows this is surely to be a hole there will be no digging out from.
or one she so desperately wants to fill.
rayray rants — UM IDK HOW I FEEL ABOUT THIS???? it's kinda different than what i normally post but i might turn it into a little hc series. anyways! hope you like and i have a very special vi post coming soon that i'm really excited about. but yeah! hopefully, i can continue this because vi working out is literally all i can think about. alright, um, see you next time ♡
#❝ ⋮ ⌗ ┆𝐫𝐚𝐲𝐫𝐚𝐲 𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭𝐬 ❞#IM KINDA SORRY ABOUT THE LAST LINE?????#but i’m also trying to make an effort not to take my writing so seriously#and this post is entirely devoted that so i hope you enjoy!#vi arcane#vi x reader#violet x reader#vi arcane x reader#vi x you#violet fanfiction#league of legends#arcane#arcane x reader#violet arcane x reader
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I think DnD lore is fascinating. The detail gone into building this universe should be celebrated, analyzed, and dissected. Pointing out inconsistencies and joking about - even becoming performatively "angry" at clumsy retcons or oversights in good humor - is the right of any devoted TTRPG player or fan.
However, I am really baffled by people who feel the need to point out or even reprehend creators who ignore or change part of the lore in their own stories to fit the narratives they they're trying to tell.
You know whats frustrating about trying to tell a story that takes place in a non-fictional world? That we have to adhere to the rules of how that world functions. Or at least we better do that or else a gaggle of sticklers will come barreling through all of the subtext, themes, and whatever point you the writer were trying to make, to instead point out that the *obscure and deeply debated* historical element you used was incorrect and took them out of the narrative, or ask why the character didn't simply "call the police".
The beautiful thing to me about DnD, on the other hand, is that it is deeply malleable. You can take things out or add things in or change them to your liking all in the name of serving the story that you want to tell and keeping it focused on what you deem important - instead of having to take random detours to explain how unimportant-event-that-slightly-facilitates-my-plot is possible. It was this magical rock. It was the Gods. It was fictional faction established in chapter two. It was this skeleton man I randomly met in a tomb.
I understand that this mindset might not appeal to people who want to read stories about strict and well-defined political and cultural conflict, or centuries-old Godly spats of biblical proportions based on ancient and well-established astral beef - if that kind of thing IS the main course for you, I get it. Go out there. Find it and eat it up.
But there is another section of people for whom those aspects are set-dressing, whose engagement depends more so on dynamics set between characters and their emotional development throughout the story - everything else is there to facilitate these interpersonal journeys and make it as concise and interesting as possible. Naturally, most people are going to be some mix of both archetypes, but I think they will always prioritize one over the other.
Regardless - remember, it's fantasy. You are arguing for (at times demanding, even) consistency in populations and creatures that have never existed. You GOTTA admit that that is a little silly.
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New Alt-Right Playbook! This one was co-written with, and narrated by, Abigail Thorn of PhilosophyTube. We talk about the feint wherein a person is somehow rhetorically stronger being wrong on two fronts instead of one.
If you think this is good work and would like to see good work compensated, you can back me and/or Abi on Patreon.
Transcript below the cut.
Say, for the sake of argument, you’re having a discussion with a coworker about healthcare. (Actually, let’s go ahead and drop the pretence: you’re having a discussion about trans healthcare.) He says puberty blockers should be banned because some study said they're dangerous. And you’re a thoughtful person, so you look it up.
Only when you do, you find the study doesn’t say what he said it does. Maybe it says something close, maybe it says the total opposite! But more than that, you realize - even if it said what he said it did, that still wouldn’t support his argument. “Dangerous” could mean a lot of things - a little? a lot? low risk, high risk? Maybe one study isn’t enough to go on. Hell, maybe it’s bogus for a whole host of other reasons! Maybe it’s written by people with an obvious agenda, or contradicted by a better study he’s ignoring. So you go back and tell your coworker, “Hey, the study doesn’t say that, and even if it did, y’know…” But he simply repeats “The study said they’re dangerous.” He’s not just wrong… he’s
DOUBLEWRONG
Institutions create policy documents all the time. Anti-bullying policies, climate policies, DEI policies - your job probably has a bunch of them. But a lot of the time these documents exist not to be read or followed, just pointed to. If someone is bullied, harassed, or discriminated against, managers might point to a policy that says, ‘We are committed to not doing that.’ And… that’s it. The more you insist, ‘Hey, these policies aren’t being followed, the problem still exists!’ the more you become the problem.
The document is a dummy argument, a substitute for the real one: ‘There’s a problem’ Vs ‘No there isn’t.’ This isn’t a conversation about what some document says or doesn’t say; it’s a conversation about power.
When your coworker cites a study that doesn’t support his argument, he’s using that document in a similar way. He’s not reading it; just pointing to it. ‘This piece of paper means you have to listen to me.’ The study could be about plankton, or Henry VIII, or squirrel poop for all the difference it makes. (Okay, maybe it matters a little: it has to at least look semi-legit at a glance.) He’s not using evidence to inform his position; he’s decided what his position is and he’s pantomiming evidence to support it.
It’s almost as if we’ve stumbled into The Sorcerer’s Apprentice! Little Mickey’s put on the hat and declared, “I know how this works! You stand up, all big and tall, and say ‘I have a study that says you have to do what I tell you!’ That’s how you always play it. Well, this time I’ve got a study, so you have to do as I say!”
And you can tell him, “That’s not how this works, Mickey: it’s a study, not an incantation. It has to actually say what you claim, and it has to be a good study.”
“Ohhh, look at you moving the goalposts! Look at you gatekeeping! Deciding which studies count and which ones don’t. Well I believe this one’s every bit as good as yours, and I believe it proves me right!”
And is that what he believes? Maybe. Maybe not. Remember: The Card Says Moops - you can’t prove he doesn’t believe that. And for the purposes of ‘You have to listen to me’ that’s all he needs. This is a battle of wills now, not information, each half of the doublewrong argument functioning as both motte and bailey. If you successfully expose that study as bogus he’ll move on to another, and you’ll only be undermining the scientific method in his view: if studies aren’t always to be trusted, if even quack science can get peer-reviewed, who’s to say your studies aren’t as bogus as his? And that’s if he doesn’t change evidence entirely - ‘Okay maybe I can’t prove puberty blockers are dangerous, but this study says trans kids have high regret rates; this one says they’re unhappy; this one says they’re brainwashed!’
He’s understood the rhetorical function of science, but not the substance. Or perhaps he’s understood the rhetorical function all too well, enough to know, for the purposes of argument, substance rarely matters.
From here, you can chart the course of the entire conversation stretching out before you: You might rush in, hold the document under his nose and say, ‘Look! It doesn’t say what you said it does! What’s the matter, can’t read?’ Which might be satisfying, but does make you look the pedantic asshole.
Or you can reject his so-called evidence as patently false, inadmissible, and leave yourself vulnerable to being obliterated the moment you make an honest mistake with a citation.
Or you can research every single shred of information he puts in front of you, so you can thoroughly debunk each and every one, which means he simply keeps putting bunk in front of you and drowns you with homework.
And he must see it, too, the conversation laid out in front of him. He hasn’t positioned himself to persuade you, but to ensure neither of you ever persuades the other. What is the purpose of this debate, then? This ritual? What is it you’re really arguing about?
Well, your coworker believes that the government (or a doctor doing what the government tells them) should force citizens from a minority to do something with their bodies they don’t want to do. But he won’t say that out loud because he knows that’s socially unacceptable. ‘I want the government to force people to do what I want with their bodies no matter how many of them die in the process,’ is an opinion that isn’t likely to make friends. So he substitutes the document for the thing he really believes. “It’s not me. It’s just science.” He is appealing to facts when, truthfully, this is a difference in values.
Doublewrong is a rhetorical technique to catch you out, to hide the real argument from you and leave you chasing the substitute. It also protects him.
People deploy these kinds of irrational, paradoxical moves to stop themselves thinking about topics that make them uncomfortable. If your coworker interrogated his values about the proper relationship between the government and minorities he might find he’s not the person he thought he was, or that his friends and colleagues expect him to be. (And you might too - let’s not pretend Leftists and Liberals have the moral high ground all the time - interrogating your fundamental values is an uncomfortable experience for most people.) He probably wants to think of himself as a good person, and yet he also believes (maybe not even consciously) that the government should own the bodies of at least some citizens. He knows he’d probably hate that if it happened to him, but he still wants it to happen to others. Doublewrong relieves him of the burden of forming a rational position. The document is his nice big safety blanket.
This plays on a human weakness that spans the entire political spectrum: we all wrap ourselves snug in faulty information from time to time. We share studies without reading because the abstract conforms to our assumptions; we treat a supposition that is likely as though it’s a proven fact. And this is, after a point, necessary: as informed as you are, you do have to stop researching somewhere. You do, at some point, have to go on assumptions, take someone’s word, trust that a pattern holds, because the video’s due before the end of the month if you want to charge your patrons and make rent!
…sorry.
But we do, sometimes, treat research as a ritual rather than a method. Because, often, we want to appeal to facts, papers, authorities, without having to do any of that pesky reasoning. But that is exactly what leaves us open to a doublewrong attack. The flaw with your coworker’s study is he’s using it to claim trans healthcare is dangerous, and he’s wrong. He has a comeback for every way you could try to convince him, but he’s still wrong. You can’t prove trans healthcare is safe by gesturing at studies, because the opposition won’t read them. And will write their own studies. You can’t prove it with peer review, because they’ll game peer review. You can’t call them liars because they’ll insist they’re sincere. There is no rule they can’t pervert, no system they can’t twist to their advantage. You can’t just appeal to things that signify “reason,” at some point one of you will have to do some actual reasoning to figure out who’s making sense, and, well, it’s not going to be them.
Remember: this is a conversation about values. Presuming you know what yours are, you may have to speak them aloud.
‘I think people should do what they like with their bodies without politicians interfering, and even if I thought puberty blockers were dangerous (which by the way they’re not because on the off-chance you actually care about evidence here’s all the good stuff) I think people have the right to make risky decisions about their healthcare too. If there was a drug with a 1% chance of healing your terminal cancer and a 99% chance of dangerous side effects I’d support your right to take it if you wanted.’ Now you’ve avoided the trap of arguing about what some document says. You’re focusing on the second, deeper part of the doublewrong instead of the first. You’ve also put him on the back foot: now he has to justify his values, which is exactly what he wanted to avoid!
Of course, he may just repeat himself: ‘The study says they’re dangerous!’ This is not a technique for winning arguments. It’s a technique for starting them.
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I was playing phantom hourglass earlier and I got to the part where I needed a salvage arm for my boat to advance the plot. Okay, no biggie, I was hoping I'd get one soon anyway. I go to the island and talk to the guy who makes them. He says I have to yell my enthusiasm and then he'll sell me the arm, but I'm sitting at the table with my family and don't want to just start yelling at the 3ds, so I just blow in the mic, thinking it'll probably count right? right.
The guy is like "ooh... that was an insane scream. I'll sell you the arm for 1000 rupees."
...which is a crime in and of itself, but I just spent 1000 rupees on a bigger bomb bag, and currently only had around 400.
So I leave. I don't really want to leave the island I'm on, so I wander around and kill monsters and cut grass etcetera. I kill and cut every monster and piece of grass on this island and I'm only up to around 600 rupees. I really don't want to sail around and try and find another spot to get money, so I'm thinking... and then I remember I have a shovel.
So I get out my shovel. I start digging.
Holes only sometimes give you rupees, and usually only 1. Occasionally 5.
I dig up that entire island.
There are holes as far as the eye can see. holes coating every patch of land there is. I make the island uninhabitable. if the cannon guy ever came out of his shop he would be screaming at me for turning his island into nothing but dirt. it is no longer bomb island. it is hole island. I dig so many holes the game gives up on my holes and starts getting rid of the oldest holes I've dug.
at this point five of my siblings are looking over my shoulders and staring in abject horror and fascination at my intense digging. my brother is begging me to just sail to a different island and make money some other way. my one sister is talking about how she did the same thing on animal crossing once. another one of my sisters is just cackling.
finally
finally
FINALLY
I get to 1000 rupees, to much rejoicing from the cheering section. It's probably been a good 20 minutes of digging holes at this point. I troop back to the guy who makes the salvage arms, and he wants me to yell again because apparently that part resets. Since most of my family is watching me now, I ask if anyone wants to yell this time, and my sister goes "ooh me!!" and so she yells enthusiastically into the mic.
the cannon guy goes "hey that was a nice solid yell. I'll sell you the arm for 200 rupees."
pure pandemonium ensues.
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Sure, you can go dig through the troves of his work, interviews, etc., and find some hints that look obvious in hindsight, but you could also do that for literally any creator and do some Da Vinci Code numerology nonsense to invent evidence against them, too.
I was watching this deep dive into James Charles' history once, and I ended up nope-ing out partway through specifically because of something like this.
The whole conceit of the video, rather than just being a recounting of his history on Youtube including the scandals that pretty much ruined his career; the youtuber decided to take the angle of essentially recontextualizing his history on Youtube with the hindsight of knowing about the horrible things he was doing behind the scenes.
This tactic led to the youtuber doing things like painting the collaborations he did early on in his career — a completely normal thing that most youtubers do, no matter what size their channels are — as proof that he was uniquely clout chasing. Like, referenced one of those collaborators complaining that Charles seemed more interested in the boost he would get than the collaborator, sure. But also explicitly called out doing collaborations at all as uniquely clout chasing. (Also this is more of an annoyance, but I DEEPLY dislike their use of the phrase "social climber", especially using it as an insult in the same vein as "golddigger". That is some classist fuckin bullshit, painting poorer people as uniquely sneaky and manipulative for taking advantage of networks and connections the same fuckin way that wealthy and rich people do, how dare they not Know Their Place.)
Like, what message are you sending here to people just starting out on Youtube? Just the act of reaching out to other youtubers — ESPECIALLY youtubers with larger channels than yours — is inherently manipulative? If you even THINK that doing a collaboration might boost your views and followers then you're just USING that other youtuber and you're probably a disgusting person deep down and it's only a matter of time before you do something awful.
But the thing that I found REALLY egregious, that seriously pissed me off, has since made me question everything this youtuber has said about any scandal, and made me nope out of the video was one particular collaboration they decided to include in the video.
With his brother.
Let me set the scene for you: There were two videos in this series. Charles was, I believe, in his early twenties at most, his brother was in his late teens. One video was of his brother doing his makeup, the other was him doing his brother's. His brother was visibly and vocally grumpy about it and Charles teased him about it. Charles kept calling him "sister" because that was his Thing, and his brother told him to stop. At one point his brother mentioned that he was only doing the video because their mother told him to.
Now, if you're like me, this just sounds like normal sibling behavior. If the McElroys had a beauty channel this would be the entirety of their content. They do more fucked up shit to each other over the course of a single podcast episode than Charles did over the course of two whole entire videos.
But this youtuber painted it as manipulative and controlling and abusive. They extrapolated, solely from the interactions in those two videos that was highly edited and added up to probably less than hour of footage, that Charles didn't give a shit about his brother, that his brother was a poor, trod upon soul whose feelings and personhood were being discarded for the sole sake of Charles gaining more views and followers. Because as far as I know — and I assume this youtuber would've included it in the video if it existed — the brother has never made a public statement about this. So even if he did feel like he was being abused and used by Charles, we have no actual idea.
But not only that, remember how I said the brother mentioned that he was doing the videos because their mother told him to?
This youtuber never brought up anything about their mother regarding her character or what kind of person she is in general. So based entirely on this single throwaway comment, this youtuber speculated that Charles' brother WAS BRIBED TO DO THE VIDEOS.That he was SECRETLY PAID A PORTION OF THE SPONSOR MONEY.
Now. Fucking FIRST of all, WHY is being paid to appear on a youtube channel a bad thing? People SHOULD be paid for their time! Your family should be paid for their time! What the fuck does it matter if it came from a sponsor???? Once the sponsor cut the check and it cleared? That money was Charles' to do with whatever the fuck he wanted, and giving some of it to his brother for taking what was probably multiple hours' worth of time out of his day is frankly one of the LEAST concerning things he could've done with it. Calling it a "bribe" is fucking WILD. The brother isn't fucking Clarence Thomas and Charles' youtube channel isn't the motherfucking Supreme Court, please get a fucking grip. Do you have this same reaction to parents paying their kids allowances to do chores?
Second of all, once again, WHAT ARE YOU EVEN BASING THIS ON? The youtuber presented NO information about the mother that would suggest she's inclined towards what they implied was some deep, shady manipulation. Nothing we know about Charles has anything to do with forcing people to appear on his channel, either by paying them or any other means. Even if you believe that he lied to people about being friends to convince them to collab; even if you believe that he discarded friends once he grew bigger than them and they didn't offer any potential growth; none of that points to the kind of monetary coersion they implied here.
All the information available was that at some point the mother told the younger brother to do a video with Charles, and the brother did it even though he didn't really want to. There is nothing abnormal about this. Anyone with siblings has been told by a parent to do something they didn't want to do solely for the benefit of their sibling.
This was nothing. This was wild, unfounded speculation. In a video that otherwise included MOSTLY things that WERE legitimately fucked up!
The accusations against him were legit! He admitted to them! The complaints about him becoming a regular collaborator with Known Bigots And All Around Disgusting People Jeffree Star and Shane Dawson at a time when it had been brought up publicly multiple times that they were bigots and disgusting people were legit! The accusations by people who knew him personally at the time about the viral story that led to his rise in fame being astroterfing bullshit were legit! He's done plenty of awful and questionable things that are well-documented and even admitted to, personally, by him! There's no need or reason to make things up because the Pattern Recognition Monkey in your brain says, "Well he's a bad person, and some bad people also do THIS thing, so there's A CHANCE he might have done it too!"
We have this tendency to believe that if someone did something REALLY bad, it means that EVERYTHING they did was bad, or done for bad reasons. Because no one who is good, or does good things, could EVER do something that bad. And that's just, frankly, not based in reality.
Some parents who abuse their kids do genuinely love them. Some people who are raging bigots genuinely care about the other people in their communities. Some people who abuse their spouses genuinely care about their work and coworkers.
And no one outside of themselves and maybe their therapists can confidently say for certain whether that's true for any individual person.
Does that good and genuine care for other people negate the bad and the disregard for the people they hurt? Absolutely not. But there's no point trying to piece together a puzzle when you don't have all the pieces, or even know if there's actually even a puzzle to begin with.
We did this once already in recent memory, This time around why not try letting folks mourn the loss of a literary figure and catalogue that was important to them in peace.
Because also? At the end of the day, it doesn't actually matter if someone's writing was "bad" or held secret hints to their private views. The stories and characters still made an impact on a lot of people. Publicly declaring how bad and worthless you found the person's art doesn't help their victims in any way. It just makes the people around you already struggling to deal with their deep attachment to it feel deeply uncomfortable and signals to them that they, too, might be discarded from your life just as swiftly if they ever do anything you deem bad enough.
I’m not naming names because I’m not trying to start anything but I’m seeing several mutuals claiming they always knew Gaiman was a bad egg and it was so obvious, as though they didn’t make me stand in line with them to get his signature and kept their signed copies of his books on a special shelf akin to a shrine.
And like, listen, you don’t need to pretend.
This isn’t the devil’s sacrament. You’re not tainted by association. You’re not morally bad for not immediately knowing when someone is being charming and persuasive to hide something they don’t want you to know.
Abusers don’t just groom their victims. They groom their witnesses too. You were never supposed to know something was wrong because it was intentionally hidden. It’s okay you didn’t know. You don’t need to act like you never liked him or his work. You don’t need to pretend. But you do need to stop being shitty to other people who also didn’t know because it reeks of victim blaming.
“Well I knew, so how come others didn’t?”
His victims were fans. Are you blaming them for not knowing?
Christ alive, I hope not.
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my pain, your gain
kang dae-ho x f!reader
your missing boyfriend reappears after ten days, suddenly becoming a millionaire
you went to work, a busy cafe, just like any other normal day
the 14:00-22:00 shifts are the ones you hate the most. the type of shift where you feel like there is no business, validating your reasoning as to why you shouldn't be here.
however, when you remember the amount of expenses you have to pay for. rent, groceries, cleaniness, hygiene, etc... you suddenly have a good work ethic.
before you left for your shift, you kissed your boyfriend dae-ho goodbye.
it was normal for you, except you did not notice the tense pulling on his eyebrow and his clenched jaw. you did not notice the debate shown on his face.
when you got home, around midnight due to public transport chaos, throwing your cafe apron by the washer for later.. you called out for dae ho.
the apartment was quiet.. too quiet. as if you lived alone.
"baby?"
"dae?"
"honey, are you home?"
when you checked your bedroom to see that he was gone, you assumed that he visited one of his sisters outside of the city while you worked. fine, at least he could have told you.
the sleep you had was normal, yet cold, due to the absence of dae-ho.
you woke up, feeling at ease until you reach over, your hand hitting the cold soft sheets instead of the body of your lover.
hours turn into a day, and you're broken.
you can’t stop replaying your last conversation with dae ho before you left for work, over and over, trying to find clues about why he left.
the tired body of yours can barely function at work, forgetting orders, zoning out, and apologizing when your boss points it out. your coworkers look worried, but you wave it off, saying you’re just stressed.
sleep is a distant memory. you lie awake at night, staring at the ceiling, imagining him walking back through the door like nothing happened.
each day goes by, and when you’re home, you sit on the couch or the floor, staring at the tv, not even watching what’s on.
your mind is stuck on dae-ho..where he is, if he’s okay, or if he really just left you behind.
some nights, you stand by the window, hoping to see him walking back into your life. you tell yourself it’s pointless, but you can’t help it.
you try calling his friends, even people you barely know, asking if anyone has seen him. no one has any answers, and a few of them suggest maybe he left you on purpose. it breaks something in you every time you hear it.
not your dae-ho, he would have told you if there was a problem in your relationship.
sometimes you sit in his favorite chair, holding onto one of his hoodies, and crying silently.
its day 10.. when you get home from your late shift two weeks later, it’s the same routine.
you drop onto the floor in your apron, zoning out in front of the glowing tv.
just an hour after your deadly routine, you hear the sound of your door clicking.
your heart stops, and for a moment, your eyes snap towards the door, you think you’re imagining it.
then you see him... your dae ho.
he looks older, more worn, like the world has weighed him down in the ten days he’s been gone.
your stomach twists when he steps closer, his eyes meeting yours, and you instinctively back away.
“you’re alive?”
you watch as he flinches, his hand pausing mid-reach.
“i can explain,”
he says, his voice desperate, and you motion for him to go on.
dae ho pulls a thick wad of cash from his jogger pocket, placing it in your hands. you feel the weight of it, flipping through the stack with trembling fingers.
“how much is this? where did you get it?” your voice cracks, and your chest tightens as he hesitates.
“it’s 25 million won,” he says, and you gasp, the money slipping from your hands onto the floor.
“where did you get this kind of money? is this… blood money?”
he pauses, his expression guilty but honest.
“kind of,” he admits.
"I earned it though from playing games.. I did not hurt anyone I swear!"
“games? what do you mean?”
deep down, you know dae ho never lies. why would he start now?
he promises to explain everything, but he says, “not tonight. i’ll tell you everything, i swear. but tomorrow, when the sun comes up, i’ll pay off my debt. i’ll pay off yours. we’ll leave this place, and i’ll give you the life you deserve..."
he takes you to the atm up the street. when the screen shows 15,199,998,733 won, your knees almost give out.
he holds onto your arm, steadying you as your heart pounds.
“it’s real,” he says softly. “and it’s ours.”
"me along with four other people won the game. their names are gi hun, hyun ju, myung-gi, and jun-hee. I'll introduce you to them next week. gi hun says if we ever need anything then we can call him at anytime.
you trust him because you always have, that does not stop the unease that settles in your stomach.
you ask him again about the games.
again, “not tonight.”
as you both walk back to the apartment, the weight of the money in your life is overwhelming. you hold onto him tightly, glad he’s back, but the mystery of what he went through lingers.
even as you fall asleep beside him that night, you can’t stop thinking about the games he mentioned. they’ll haunt you, just like the ten days he was gone.
I hope you liked :)
#kang dae ho#squid game#squid game s2#squid game season 2#squid game spoilers#squid game x reader#squid game x you#squid game fic#meadowfics#multifandom account#kang ha neul#female reader
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Doctor's In - Part 10
Summary: As you grow closer to Natasha and struggle with your family past, Wanda begins to doubt your relationship.
A/N: Aaah, I think this is very long. I threw in some fluff as an apology. But remember, not everything is black and white. Also, don't hate me, I just like where this is going.
------
Natasha: You missed the inferior venacava
Y/N: Come on, it’s elementary school. Not like the teacher’s gonna notice.
Natasha: Fine, but you’re getting a B- from me.
Y/N: Professor Romanoff, you’re too strict.
As the kids enter the dining room, you put your phone down.
“Where’s Mom?” you ask them, and they turn to look at each other.
“She was arguing with uncle Pietro”
“I’m sure it’s fine” you say, placing the food in front of them. “Let’s eat and practise your presentation for Biology”
“Ok” Billy agrees.
For a little while, everything seems normal until Wanda walks in, looking ready to kill someone.
“It’s absolutely useless speaking to him” she says, walking past you and into the kitchen. You follow her, leaning against the wall.
“What’s wrong?”
“He wants to go back to snowboarding. Risking his life for what? Some likes on instagram and sponsorships? You almost died trying to save him and here I am busting my ass cleaning after him. And he wants to die”
“Why don’t I talk to him? You try to calm down and eat something. The kids were worried about you”
“I’m not hungry” she shakes her head, but accepts your hug, leaning her head against your shoulder.
“Just try, for me?”
“Ok” she nods, kissing your cheek. You smile, and take your dinner out in the backyard, where Pietro is throwing a ball for Sparky.
“My answer’s still no” he says when you drag a chair and sit next to him.
“I didn’t say anything” you shrug your shoulders, offering Sparky a piece of your chicken. “What are you talking about?”
“I’m not quitting sports”
“Ok, that’s fine.”
“It’s gonna be fine. What happened that day was a freak accident. Lighting doesn’t strike twice”
“I mean, I guess. Except it absolutely can happen again. Listen, if this is your life calling and everything, I get it. Just try to understand your sister. What would you feel like if the roles were reversed? If she got seriously hurt”
“What would you do if you couldn’t perform surgery again?”
“I’d go insane” you admit. “I’m not telling you to quit. I’m just telling you to understand Wanda’s point of view. Plus, you still need to start physical therapy.”
You sit in silence for a while, eating and looking at the sky.
“I’m hungry” Pietro admits, and you laugh.
“Come on, let’s get you some food”
As Wanda prepares his dinner, you take the kids upstairs. They ask you a couple of questions about the model of the heart you helped them build with clay until they’re both yawning.
“Sleep now, boys” you close the door, watching with a smile as they’re already snoring.
Wanda is still cleaning the kitchen when you join her, and she smiles at you.
“Thank you. He’s being less stubborn now. Wants to start therapy next week”
“My pleasure. I’ll finish cleaning, go to bed” you say, kissing her temple. She squeezes your arm in thanks, but turns around as she remembers.
“Could you take out the trash?”
“Huh? Yes. I’ll do it, no worries” you answer absentmindedly, looking at your phone.
You spend a lot of time on your phone lately, Wanda thinks.
After cleaning up, you sit and practise for your own test tomorrow. Natasha told you they’ll begin to implement her mother’s technique at the hospital and you want to scrub in.
For that, you need a bunch of grapes and a sowing kit. Everytime you finish a set of stitches, you send a picture to Nat and wait for her feedback.
Nat: That one’s perfect.
You smile at that, proud of your work. You’re so busy texting back that you don’t hear Wanda come in.
“Did you take out the trash?”
“Oh, crap. Let me do that right now” you put your phone down and remove your gloves.
“Who are you talking to?”
“What?”
“I’ve been waiting for an hour for you to come to bed, and it seems like you’d rather be texting. Is it her?” Wanda says, clearly upset.
“Wanda, come on. I was practising to scrub in this week. It would be a pretty big deal if they pick me to be in the surgery”
“Please, it’s so obvious that woman will let you in just because she has a thing for you” Wanda scoffs.
“Oh, so you’re saying I can’t get in because of my skills?”
“That’s not even… you know what? Don’t come to bed”
“What?�� you turn to look at her, frowning.
“You can sleep on the couch” she says, leaving the kitchen without looking back at you.
Un-fucking-believable.
Fine, whatever. You’ll sleep on the fucking couch.
You clean up your mess and finally take out the trash, going to your car for a cigarrette and a lighter.
As you sit in the porch, another text comes from Natasha.
You decide it’s faster to call her.
“Isn’t it past your bedtime?” she jokes.
“Nah, I was kicked out of the bedroom”
“What did you do?” Natasha asks, clearly amused.
“Why do you assume it was me who did something?” you want to sound offended, but after a beat of silence, you admit the truth. Or part of it. “I forgot to take out the trash”
“That’s not so bad”
“I guess not. But whatever, I’ll manage for tonight. Got a doble shift ahead of me tomorrow”
“Sorry, if I was there I’d be more than happy to take you in” she says in a low voice and you don’t know exactly what to say to that.
“When do you get here, by the way?”
“My flight lands at seven thirty”
“Want me to pick you up? We can have breakfast and then go to the hospital” you offer, feeling better at the prospect of having plans to catch up with Natasha.
“I wouldn’t want to trouble you”
“Not at all, I’m happy to play the part of private driver”
“Will you hold a sign with my name like they do in the movies?”
“I’ll try” you laugh, looking behind you. “Alright, I’ll go get some sleep. Night, Nat”
“Night, Y/N”
Pulling out a blanket and a cushion, you lay down, sighing and trying to get comfortable. A few minutes later, you can hear Wanda going out of her study, and you stay still, hoping she won’t come looking for you.
Truth is, you don’t want to talk to her right now either.
Not after she kicked you out of the room for something so insignificant.
So, you close your eyes and try to let go of the hurt.
Tomorrow will be better.
—
Next morning, you get up at break of dawn to get changed and pack your bag for the next 48 hours. Honestly? You’re happy to be at the hospital for two days.
“Want some breakfast before you leave?” Wanda offers when you walk in to get changed, and by the looks of it, she didn’t get much sleep last night.
“I’m fine” is all you say, looking for your scrubs and your phone charger.
“Y/N” she calls as you’re about to leave. You turn to look at her reluctantly, eager to just walk out of the room. “Have a nice day”
“You too” you say, without any emotion, going down the stairs and straight to your car.
The ride to the airport lets you clear your head, and you feel a lot more relaxed when you go down to wait for Natasha.
It’s not long before you spot her, walking out and looking flawless.
“My apologies in advance” is all she says as you approach her, and you look confused.
“What do you mean?”
“Natalia, wait for me! You’re always in such a hurry” a blonde woman, younger and shorter than Natasha comes right behind her, carrying three very big suitcases. “Are you our Uber?”
“Yelena!” Natasha scolds, switching to Russian. “I’m sorry, my sister has no manners”
“Hey, no worries, it’s not the first time I’ve had siblings fighting in a foreign language” you smile, introducing yourself to Yelena.
“Nice to meet you. Thank you for picking us up”
“Are you staying for the whole month?” you comment, struggling with Yelena’s bags.
“Yes, my mother arranged for me to spend some time learning at Stark’s Hospital. I want to be a Trauma surgeon and Natasha said they have the best one she’s ever met”
“Did she say that now?” you laugh, as Natasha blushes and gets inside the car.
“Why? Do you know them?” Yelena sits on the back seat, unlocking her phone to find the address of her new place.
“Yeah, they’re ok I guess” you joke, making Natasha roll her eyes.
“It’s Y/N, you dumbass” Natasha clarifies, which makes Yelena groan and curse in Russian.
“Hey! That means bitch” you recognise it.
“How do you know it?” Yelena asks.
“My girlfriend and her brother are always saying it to each other. Living together has regressed them to their teenage years” you lament, trying not to think about them.
Yelena is restless in the backseat, asking you to change the music until you give up and hand over your phone so she can play whatever she likes.
“Have any siblings?” Natasha says, massaging her temples.
“Two half siblings but I don’t really speak to them”
“Lucky”
“Natalia, that is so rude” Yelena mutters, singing along to American Pie. “I’m hungry, can we get food before going to the apartment?”
“We’re having breakfast and then going to the hospital. That’s what grown ups do, they work even if they had to fly in the middle of the night”
“Fiiiine”
As you park, Yelena jumps out, because she wants to sit on the second floor with a view to the promenade. You wait for Natasha, and walk inside with her to the restaurant.
“So, I take it I have a new student?”
“I’m so sorry. Fury was supposed to ask you first but she’s just so damn impulsive. Please don’t feel like you have to help her in any way”
“It’s fine. I’m guessing your mother’s behind it? I don’t want you to get in any trouble. And Kate could use some friendly competition”
“I really appreciate it” Natasha smiles, and you both sit while Yelena looks out the balcony, taking pictures of the sunrise.
Yelena asks you questions about your background and work experience. You think it’s just curiosity as she’s starting her residency soon, but Natasha can tell Yelena is doing a job interview in her own sneaky way. She’s always so outgoing and charming that people have a hard time believing she can be a little shit.
“Have you ever been to Boston?” the younger woman asks and you shrug your shoulders.
“No, never been”
“You’d love it, it’s so pretty, and our hospital has one of the best Trauma centers in the country. Of course, the issue is finding the right person to run it, right Natasha?”
“I guess”
“Oh, I didn’t know you had an opening” you comment for the sake of conversation.
“Well, yes, actually. Didn’t Natasha tell you? We’re actively looking for someone” Yelena says as if it’s such a big coincidence. “You wouldn’t happen to be interested in it?”
“Sorry to say, my girlfriend would not want to move to Boston. But if I know of someone I’ll send them your way. Who was your former head of department?”
“Rumlow. You know him?” Natasha says, wishing she didn’t. He was a pretentious ass.
“Yeah, he’s an asshole. We studied together and only one of us got to go to work at John Hopkins. Spoiler alert, it wasn’t him” you brag, making Natasha smile.
“Tell me more about your girlfriend” Yelena asks, which makes Natasha flinch.
“Don’t”
“I’m just being polite” she lies, and you have a feeling it is better to change the subject. So, you ask for the check, paying for the three of you and then driving to the hospital.
“I have to get ready for the next session. Behave” Natasha says, and then turns to you. “If she’s being bad, you have my authorization to kick her ass”
“Duly noted” you wink at Nat, walking towards the ER, where Kate is already waiting with some charts for your rounds. “Morning, Doctor Bishop. This is Doctor Romanoff…”
“Belova. I go by Belova” Yelena corrects you and you nod.
“Oh, that will make it less confusing. She’s gonna be working with us for a bit. If you could teach her some of the basics of our ER I’d appreciate it”
“Oh… ok” Kate looks between you two, and then walks behind you. “Sorry, am I getting kicked out as your resident? Did I do something wrong?”
“Not at all. Yelena is here to learn, as are you. There’s enough to do for everyone, right?”
You keep an eye on their interactions, noticing how Kate is a lot more uptight in the way she keeps the ER than Yelena. The blonde moves around the hospital like she’s been there her entire life and it doesn’t come off as pretentious, but as second nature. Her mother probably always dragged her daughters along while she worked.
But, by the time there’s an ambulance coming along, you see her go into professional mode, talking to the paramedics.
“Male, forties. Fell off a ladder, was conscious but had a seizure and BP dropped” Drax says, and you move the patient to a gurney.
“Bishop? Belova?” you question them as the patient has another seizure.
“I’d administer lorazepam and rule out skull fraction and hemorrhage” Yelena says, and you nod.
“Very well. He’s your patient now” you nod. “Once you get the results, page me and Neuro”
Kate looks a little hurt at that, and you sigh, watching as Yelena stabilizes the man and coordinates with Barnes.
“She’s just here for a little while. And you need to be on your toes. ER is all about speed, Kate. Don’t sweat it”
“Yes, Doctor Y/L/N”
You pat her shoulder, going to check Natasha’s class. It’s already started and you know the exercises as she gave you an overview before anyone else. So you lean on the door, watching as everyone practises the sutures.
“Care to join us?” Natasha says and you shrug your shoulders.
“I’m on duty. Looks like your sister got her first surgery”
“So soon? Who did she piss off to get it?”
“Just my resident. That’s ok, though, I’m sure next surgery will be Kate’s” you look at Darcy, giving her an excited thumbs up when she shows you her sutures.
“Speaking of which, Fury has told me he wants Bishop and your friend Lewis in the first surgery” Natasha says and you nod, trying to hide your disappointment. “I’m really sorry, I wanted it to be you, but he’s doing us a favor with Yelena and we have to give something in return”
“I get it. There’s always a next one, right? Plus, I’m happy for Darcy, she’s an excellent surgeon and I’m sure she’ll do great” you smile at your friend. In that moment, your pager goes off and you sigh. “Gotta get back to it. See you around, Nat”
“Wait” she leaves the skills lab, following you into the hallway. Her hand rests on your wrist and you turn around.
“What’s wrong?” you say when you catch the frown on her face.
“I’m sorry, for giving you extra work with Yelena. I didn’t think… I was just saying you’re a great surgeon. If I had known my mother would do this I…”
“Nat, come on” you squeeze her hand, stepping closer. “It’s no bother at all. I’m happy to teach her whatever I can until your mother finds someone else back in Boston”
“You’re too kind. I might owe you a nice dinner after all of this” she smiles, noticing you haven’t let go of her hand.
“I’ll hold you to that” without thinking, your hand travels to her elbow and you give her a light squeeze. “I really have to go now” you say when you’re paged again. “Good luck with the surgery tomorrow”
“Thanks”
You smile back at her as you leave for the ER, finding Kate in the middle of chaos, with an accident involving three people.
“See? You got yourself at least two surgeries” you smile at her, overseeing the work. Kamala is already there, helping Kate with everything she needs.
“Heard there’s someone new” she whispers to the brunette as they stabilize a patient.
“Yeah, she’s the youngest Romanoff. I’m now competing with medical royalty for the best cases” Kate huffs, but shuts up when she catches you staring.
“She could be the Princess of Genovia and I’d still make her work for it, Bishop”
“What’s Genovia?” Kamala asks, confused.
“You’re so young” you sigh, feeling like the crypt keeper all of a sudden. “Take them to imaging and page me when you speak to Carol. I have to check on Yelena”
When you scrub in, you find that Yelena has made her way next to Tony, pushing Peter to the back of the room. It seems like she has a real talent for getting what she wants without most people noticing.
“Doctor Y/L/N, nice of you to join us. I thought you’d be with the rest of sycophants at Romanoff’s masterclass” Tony greets you bitterly.
“Doctor Stark” you try to tell him that another Romanoff is holding the suction tube, but he keeps ranting.
“Honestly, I can’t wait for this stupid training to be over. We have to pretend that we’re impressed by this, really? Stark Hospital is one of the top teaching hospitals in the continent. I’ve had applications from Yemen to study with me. I think it’s time we show the Romanoffs what it looks like to be at the forefront of innovation”
“Tony, I really don’t think we should…”
“Ugh, I get it. Natasha is your type. Redhead, green eyes, you have a crush. But honestly, I’ve known her for so long and I can tell you, she can be real phony”
“Honestly, Tony, just shut your mouth” you plead, mortified at everything Yelena just heard.
The blonde looks at you, but she seems amused.
“I agree with Doctor Stark” she says. “Natasha can be annoying. But then again, she’s my sister”
You could hear a pin drop after those words. Tony looks at you and you shrug your shoulders. It’s not like you didn’t try to warn him.
“More suction, please” is all he says, and Yelena leans forward.
“Is that ok, Doctor Stark?”
“Yeah. Peachy”
—
48 hours and six surgeries later, you feel completely beaten and ready to pass out.
The worst part is that you don’t even know if you’re gonna get some decent sleep when you get back home. Wanda texted you a couple of times, and you tried really hard to act normal, but all you want is an apology for the way she acted.
Unfortunately for those who knew you, you had a tendency to hold a grudge beyond reason.
So, you’re once again stalling, smoking outside the hospital when Natasha pulls over.
“Hey” she smiles and you wave. “Didn’t know you smoked”
“Only after a hard shift. Want one?”
“I quit last year” she shakes her head, sitting next to you.
“Congratulations. I quit every year” you joke. “Heard the first procedure went great”
“Yeah, there was a great deal of enthusiasm. Made me less reluctant to be here. And I promise you’ll be on the next surgery”
“It’s ok, I’m happy to wait for my turn. Good things come to those who wait”
“Speaking of which, what are you waiting for to go home?”
“I don’t know” you shrug your shoulders. “I just wanted a moment to chill before going back to reality, ya know?”
“If for some reason you end up on the couch again, I have a spare bed in the apartment” she offers and you laugh.
“Thank you, Nat” you watch as Yelena finally goes out to meet her sister. “Have a good night, you two”
“Bye, Y/N. Thank you for a great first shift!” Yelena says, excited. She was working as much as you did and for some reason she’s not looking disheveled or exhausted.
To be fair, you’ve been doing this for more years than her.
By the time you get home, all of the lights are out except the one on the porch. Thinking it might be better to stay downstairs, you drop your bag and plop down on the couch, like you used to do when you were living alone and came back completely spent from grueling shifts.
After a few minutes you hear someone walking down the stairs.
“Y/N?” Wanda calls and you sigh.
“Hey”
“I thought I heard you come in”
“Yeah, sorry” you sit up, rubbing your eyes. “It’s pretty late and I didn’t want to wake you up. Go back to sleep”
“Did you eat something?” Wanda ignores your suggestion to go back upstairs, sitting on the edge of the couch.
“Nah, I’m exhausted. Maybe tomorrow. Sleep is all I want now” you sink your face in the cushion, hoping that’s the end of the conversation.
“Come to bed” Wanda asks softly, her hand pushing a strand of hair out of your face.
“You sure?”
“Yes. I can’t sleep without you” she admits in a low voice and you smile.
“Ok, then. Let’s go to bed” you stand up, allowing Wanda to lead you to your room, smiling when she settles next to you.
You’re practically asleep by the time your head hits the pillow, and Wanda admires your sleeping form, wishing she could know what’s going on with you.
“I love you” she whispers against your forehead as she places a small kiss there.
She wonders if that’s enough to get through this rough patch.
—
Hunger is what wakes you up. If your stomach wasn’t protesting the lack of food, you’d stay in bed for the next eight hours.
“Hey, you’re up” Wanda greets you when you walk in the kitchen.
“I’m starving” you say, going through the fridge and hoping Pietro didn’t eat everything again.
“Want me to make you something?”
“That’s ok. I’ll get some cereal” you reject her offer, though you are dying for some of her pancakes.
There’s a beat of silence as you start eating, and then Wanda interrupts it.
“Did you get to scrub in on that big surgery?”
“Nope. Guess Natasha doesn’t like me that much, huh?” you try to joke, but it comes off as bitter.
“So, we’re doing this” Wanda sighs, standing in front of you. You keep eating, looking down at your plate.
“Doing what, exactly?”
“Arguing over her”
“I’m not arguing. There’s nothing to argue about. I’m just mad and hurt because you made me sleep on the couch before a 48 hour shift over forgetting to take out the trash” you say, crossing your arms. Now you’re not even hungry.
“It’s not about the trash. It’s about how you’re constantly on your phone, or spend more hours in the hospital and how you walk out of a freaking room with her” Wanda says, raising her voice.
“Wanda, she knows I’m with you. We barely talk about personal shit. Hell, I don’t even know if she likes women!”
“She likes you, and that’s enough for me to hate her and this whole situation”
“I have never, ever, given you a reason to doubt me or my committment to this family. I can’t control if she likes me, but what I can control is my own actions. And Wanda, I would never cheat on you. It’s not who I am” you insist. “This is the last time I will defend myself over this subject. You need to figure out if you can get over it or not, because it’s getting exhausting”
She looks at you, and you stand up, washing your dishes. As you’re about to leave the kitchen, Wanda calls for you. You’re surprised to feel her clinging to you, her hands around your shoulders.
“I’m sorry” she says against your neck. “You know how he lied to me. I guess I’m afraid it will happen again. But you’re right, you’re not him. I’m sorry, please, Y/N”
Her voice quivers as she keeps pleading and all of your defenses drop instantly. You turn around, hugging Wanda tight against your body.
“I’m here. I want to be here. I love you and the boys and this is the life I want. Don’t forget that”
“I know. I love you”
You give her a sad smile when you break apart, watching as tears roll down her cheeks.
“Maybe we could… let’s go out tonight. Have a date for ourselves. I’ll ask Laura to take the kids for the night or find a babysitter. I just want to be with you” she asks, leaning her forehead against yours.
“I’m down to whatever it is you want to do” you promise, kissing her nose. “So, we’re good?”
“Yes, detka. We’re good”
And for a moment, you truly believe this will be the end of it.
—
“Where are you going?” Billy follows you, while Tommy stays glued to his mother.
“Ask your Mom, bubs” you say, looking over at Wanda.
“We’re going to the ballet. Would you like to join us?”
“No” they both say, running out of the room.
“Are we really going to the ballet?” you say, trying to not sound disappointed. It’s not like you don’t want some time alone with Wanda, but you’re still pretty tired and if you sit in a theater for two hours you might end up asleep.
“Of course not. But I’m not telling you just yet” Wanda kisses your cheek, taking your hand so you both go down the stairs.
“Have fun tonight” Pietro waves goodbye, Morgan and the children busy with a videogame.
“Kids, come say bye to us” Wanda asks and the twins run to your arms.
“Love you. And you” you say, blowing a raspberry on Billy’s cheeks and then tickling Tommy.
“Love you too” they reply, giggling.
“Love you three” Wanda smiles, kissing them before taking your hand.
“So, when are you telling me… you’re kidding” you say when Wanda hands you a piece of fabric to cover your eyes. You scoff, but tie it, and lean in the seat of the car. “How did you know that my perfect date is to be kidnapped by a beautiful woman?”
“Well, you did tell me you like to be tied up” she jokes and you squirm in your seat. “Maybe some other time we’ll try that”
“Tease”
You try to picture the road Wanda is taking but after ten minutes you give up, leaning back and humming along to the beat of the music playing in the stereo. Thankfully it’s your Beatles playlist, as your father always made you listen to them.
“If I fell in love with you, would you promise to be true, and help me understand, cos I’ve been in love before, and found that love was more than just holding hands” you sing, making Wanda laugh. Of course you know all the lyrics by heart.
“You have a really nice voice. You should sing more”
“Pass, baby. Can I take my blindfold now?”
“Always so impatient” Wanda teases you. “Fine, we’re here either way”
Cheering, you pull the blindfold down, blinking a couple of times to adjust your eyes. Looking out the window, you can see the lights of the amusement park that is close to the peninsula.
“Oh my God! I’ve been wanting to come here for so long”
Ever since you moved to the city, you had planned to visit with Darcy but work always got in the way. You knew Wanda had come with the kids in the past and you always talked about visiting again.
“Come on, let’s go” Wanda takes your hand, and you eagerly follow her to the entrance. You walk around, pointing at all the things you want to try. Without realising, Wanda is leading you to the ride you absolutely do not want to get on.
“Nu-uh” you step back when she turns you to the Haunted House.
“Oh, come on! Please? I can never go because of the kids, and I love haunted houses. Plus it’s in a cart so we’re not gonna be chased by anything”
“People pay money to get chased?” you shout, jumping away when a group of teenagers are wheeled between the doors of the ride, screaming. “Babe, come on. I’ll do anything to skip this one”
“Please? It will be fun. Ok, not fun for you” she clarifies when you make a face.
“Give me one good reason” you challenge her. Of course, Wanda decides to pull you into a kiss, and it’s so good it takes your breath away.
“I knew being this gay would get me in trouble” you mumble while she celebrates her victory.
As you wait in line, you try to get a look at what’s inside and watch people who leave the ride, talking and laughing. They don’t seem traumatized or crying. That’s good, right?
“Ok, no, I want out” you plead the minute you sit down, and the woman operating the ride gives you a curious stare. That makes you settle, and you sink in your small seat, where your legs can barely fit.
The cart is sent through the tracks and you’re engulfed by darkness, still trying to figure out if the first thing will jump from the left or the right.
“Hell, no” you scream, feeling something in your head.
“It’s just rags, detka” Wanda eases your nerves, looking excited for the next scare.
Now that you’re also worried about whatever touches your head, you miss the dummy that pops out on your right, flailing while something that looks like sausages spills out of its chest.
“Gross AND anatomically incorrect” you shout at it.
“You’re so crazy” Wanda laughs next to you, until something else jumps from a coffin and scares her.
“Please let it be over, oh, God why are there red lights”
You are wheeled into a room full of weird looking creatures, and a spray of fake blood almost stains your clothes.
“Should have worn scrubs” you mutter.
There are a couple of typical jumpscares, like the plastic bat that falls from the ceiling, or the cackling witch that almost touches you with its decaying hand.
“Let’s never do that again” you say as soon as the cart stops, jumping out and looking all disheveled.
“Mmm, let’s try the one where you walk next time we come” she says instead and laughs when you look like you’re going to pass out.
“You’re being mean”
“I’m sorry, let’s do something you want now”
Roller coasters and other mechanical rides have never been your jam, so you walk towards the carnival games. You try your luck at the ring toss, balloon darts and the fishing game.
“Ok, last one” you say, pulling Wanda to the milk botttle toss. You’re determined to win something for her, though she insists she doesn’t need anything.
“Ok, that was very impressive” she says when you throw the ball and it knocks down the bottle at the top. The second ball barely touches the rest of the bottles and you sigh, changing your stance. Before throwing, you look at Wanda and place your cheek next to her face.
“Good luck kiss?”
Your girlfriend blushes, but kisses you and walks back as you get ready to throw.
“Babe, I did it!” you shout, lifting Wanda in the air.
“Very nice, detka” she laughs as you put her down, turning to check all the stuffed animals that she can pick from. “Oh, I want the capybara”
“You heard the lady” you say to the man in charge of the stand and he hands it to Wanda.
As you get some food, she pulls it against her chest.
“I love it”
“I love you” you smile, kissing the back of her hand.
There’s a lot to pick from, but you settle on hot dogs and fries, talking about the book and Pietro’s physical therapy.
“What about your surgery?”
“What surgery?” you say as you finish your own food.
“Do you know when you’ll scrub in?”
“Oh, no idea. I know they’re having another one tomorrow, but the Chief’s the one making the calls right now, so” you shrug your shoulders. “Alright, I’m done. Want to go on the ferris wheel before we head home?”
“Sure”
Wanda was a bit hesitant because of the height, but once you reach the top of the ride and enjoy the view, she decides it was totally worth it.
“I loved our date night, thank you” you say, noticing how she’s getting cold and offering your own jacket. “Here, baby”
“Thank you. I’m glad you liked it, even if I made you go into the Haunted House”
“Darcy must never hear how much I screamed” you warn her, enjoying how she scoots closer, leaning her head against your shoulder.
The view is breathtaking and you enjoy it in silence, until Wanda speaks again.
“Our first birthday here, mom and dad took us to one of these amusement parks. We had been in the US for some months and I think it was the first time I thought we could have a normal life”
“That sounds nice. I’m glad you had them to create good memories”
“Yeah, I wish my dad was around to see the kids grow” she sighs. “And if my mother wasn’t so stubborn…”
“Uh… your mom’s alive?” you blurt out, and smack your mouth shut, mortified. “Ok, that came out wrong. It’s just, you never mention her!” you stutter, while Wanda laughs.
“We had… a disagreement. After everything settled in Sokovia, they moved back to this small farm. It was the life they had always wanted. But my dad got cancer and he made mom promise she wouldn’t tell us. I was starting my job at the publishing house and he didn’t want to… I don’t know, worry us?”
“I’m sorry, Wanda”
“So, yeah, by the time we knew it was too advanced and we didn’t get to say goodbye. I’ve had… some resentment towards her ever since. I think we deserved to know” she looks away and you let her take time to calm down.
“I get it, it happens all the time. Sometimes patients want something that goes against their family’s wishes. It’s a fine line, between wanting the best for your loved one and giving them the freedom to choose”
“Yeah. I know Pietro speaks to her because he’s a mama’s boy. But she hates flying and I don’t feel like I’m strong enough to go back to Sokovia… there’s a lot of painful memories”
“Maybe one day we can all go. Or find a middle ground. Whatever you want”
“My mom would love you” Wanda says and you laugh.
“Well duh, all the Maximoffs love me”
“Especially me” she says, kissing you softly. You smile against her lips and break apart just as the ride ends.
You agree to drive back home, while Wanda plays music from your car console.
“You have a playlist titled W?”
“Yeah, those are songs that remind me of you”
The first song she plays is Kiss Me by Sixpence None the Richer.
“A classic, and so romantic”
“I need to see the entire playlist” she asks and you hand over your phone.
“The password’s the day of our first date” you say. Wanda melts at that, and she’s scrolling down to check out all the songs -her absolute favorite is This will be (An Everlasting Love) by Nat King Cole- when a text comes through.
Nat: Got you a spot at tomorrow’s surgery :)
Nat: So I think now you owe me dinner
Wanda reads the text a couple of times, and her curiosity gets the best of her. To you it looks like she’s scrolling through the playlist, but she’s actually going through your conversation with Natasha.
It’s definitely more flirty on her side, but you’re not acting cold towards her. Wanda knows how friendly you can be, but it seems like on some level, you’re tethering between nice and flirty.
She doesn’t get very far, feeling like she crossed a major boundary. Your words echo back. You’re done discussing the matter and it’s all in her head.
Right?
“Everything ok? I know you don’t like Paramore but The Only Exception makes me think of us” you say, unaware of what is happening.
“Yeah, no. I think I ate too much” Wanda lies and you squeeze her leg, parking outside of the house. She lets you open the door for her and as you pay Morgan, Wanda goes upstairs to change into her pajamas.
It’s all in your head.
But when you go up, and are lookig at your phone with a smile, she has to bite her tongue and pretend like everything’s fine.
“Oop, let me answer this” you say as you get a call.
“Don’t be long” she asks, her voice small.
“Yes, my love” you wink at her. Going downstairs, you look behind you to make sure she’s not listening. “Hello? Yes. About that ring. I’m buying it”
—
Life is great.
Fantastic.
You bought an engagement ring and you’re proposing to Wanda.
As you enter the conference room for the staff meeting, you whistle, making Stark look at you.
“Someone got lucky”
“Yes, I got lucky by meeting the most amazing woman in the world” you smile, sitting down next to Darcy.
“Ugh, I hate cheerful Y/N, it makes me want to unfriend you” she jokes, but you just roll your eyes.
Chief Fury goes over the most important things for every department, and then reminds you the next surgery with the Romanoff technique is happening today, with you as assistant to Natasha.
“Oh, that’s why you’re so peppy” Stark rolls his eyes.
“Tony, don’t be such a drag. Live, love, laugh” you pat his back as the meeting ends and you run after Darcy.
“Hey” Natasha meets you in the hall and you stop for a second. “Ready for today?”
“Yes! I just need to ask Darcy some questions” you lie. “Meet you in the OR”
You finally catch up to your friend and she eyes you suspiciously.
“Did Wanda get you pregnant?”
“That would be a dream. Our kids would be beautiful. Come here” you pull her by the sleeve of her lab coat. “Wanna ask me what did I do this weekend?”
“No”
“Darcy” you stomp your foot on the ground and she sighs.
“Fine, Y/N, what did you do over the weekend? But without the dirty details” she adds, raising her hand.
“I went shopping. Sort of. I actually made a call about something I wanted to buy”
“New toaster?”
“Engagement ring” you say, and finally, Darcy reacts accordingly.
“Oh, my God! At last! Show me!”
“Ok, so only a picture because it’s getting adjusted to Wanda’s ring size but here”
Darcy admires the yellow gold ring, white diamonds surrounding a big ruby in the middle.
“Holy crap, it’s beautiful. How are you proposing?”
“Ugh, that’s the hard part. I want it to be memorable but not over the top, you know?” you take back your phone, smiling.
“So, a flashmob is out of the question?”
“Very much so. If Wanda sees me dancing she won’t want to marry me” you joke, making Darcy laugh.
“I’m happy for you”
“Thanks, pal. And you’re gonna be my maid of honor, whether you want to or not”
“I can live with that. Congratulations to you and Wanda” she adds a little louder, because Natasha is walking towards you, and your friend still doesn’t like the way the redhead looks at you.
“Congratulations are in order?” the woman says, eyeing you curiously.
“No, she’s just joking about uh, getting a new toaster” you lie, trying to keep your proposal a secret.
“Alright then. Let’s save some lives”
“Sounds good” you smile, walking down the hall with Natasha.
—
For the first time in a long time, Wanda wishes there was more chaos at home. The silence doesn’t help with those spiraling thoughts about you and that doctor.
You’re performing an exciting surgery next to her, saving lives and doing something you’ve always dreamed of doing.
How can she ever compete with that?
Will she have to watch as you keep pulling back, until you come to your senses and leave her?
You had so much fun on your date and Wanda thought things would get better. If she hadn’t seen those messages, maybe things would be different. What would you even think if you knew she read your private conversations?
Her mind’s a mess, so much so that she doesn’t even notice someone’s at the door of your former house, knocking and looking through the windows.
The girl looks fairly young, 18 at most, so she figures it might be a college student looking for accommodation. But she’s insisting on knocking even when it’s clear no one’s around, so Wanda decides it’s better to check if she can help.
“Hello there” Wanda approaches the girl, smiling.
“Hi. I… I’m looking for my sister”
“Oh, you might have the wrong address. This house is empty. What’s your sister’s name?”
“Y/N Y/L/N”
“You’re Y/N sister” Wanda repeats, amazed. She’s never even seen a picture of the girl. All she knows are your half siblings names. “Jenny”
“Yes. Do you know her? Can I borrow your phone? I really need to talk to her” the girl says, and Wanda pays closer attention to her demeanor. She has a backpack, running shoes and a piece of paper with the address. No phone, or anything else.
It honestly looks like she ran away from home.
“Ok, sweetheart, come over and we’ll try calling her. She’s in surgery right now, but I’m sure she’ll manage to come over if she knows you need her”
“Thank you. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to be such a bother, Miss…”
“Wanda. My name’s Wanda”
—
Things are going great. You look at your work and then at Natasha across the operating table.
“Almost as good as mine” she says and you roll your eyes.
“It’s pretty darn good, Romanoff”
“Fine. I’ll make sure to write those words down in my report”
Fury is observing from the corner, approving of your work as well.
“Nice job, Y/L/N. Now, I’ve heard your residents are drowning with all the patients in the ER”
“Ah, this work never ever ends, does it?” you sigh, going out of the OR as the rest of the teams cleans up. Natasha is behind you and washes her hands next to you.
“That was amazing, Nat, honestly. Thank you”
“Don’t thank me. You earned it. No one practised more hours than you did”
“I had a great teacher” you smile at her. “What’s next? Monitoring over the next 24 hours?”
“I can handle that, I know you got work to do at the ER”
“No worries, I’ll stop by later and check how everything's going” you pat her shoulder, smiling as you leave the scrub room. You hear Natasha call your name and you turn, thinking there’s something you forgot. “What’s up?”
“I… nothing. Good job out there”
You nod, and leave as you get paged a couple of times. Yeah, Fury wasn’t exaggerating, the ER is total chaos. There’s a school group fighting over a baseball match gone wrong -two concussions, a broken nose- and to top it all of, Yelena and Kate are arguing over who gets what cases.
“Ok, that’s enough. Belova, CT scans. Bishop, you’re monitoring the post op of my patient with Doctor Romanoff”
Typically, that wouldn’t be the most exciting work to do, but it’s a new procedure and Bishop’s more than happy to obey.
“Can I get the broken nose too?“ Yelena asks, dancing when you nod.
One of the guys with a concussion has a seizure, which prompts one of the teachers to scream. You have to kick everyone out, trusting Yelena will be able to stabilize him.
You lose track of time, going in and out of the ER and asking for consults with Ortho, Peeds and Plastics. It’s only after a few hours that you think about checking your phone.
Six missed calls from Wanda. Your heart drops as you call her back.
“Baby, are you ok?”
“Yes. Relax” she says, noticing how tense you sound.
“Come on, are you hurt? Are the kids ok? Six missed calls is something” you begin to ramble.
“Your sister’s here” Wanda cuts you off, figuring there’s no easy way to say it.
“Jenny? Did my mother…?”
“No, it’s just your sister” Wanda looks back, lowering her voice. “I think she ran away from home”
“Oh, shit” you pinch the bridge of your nose. “That’s just fucking fantastic. My mother’s gonna make a scene”
“I don’t think…”
“Jenny came to find me. Who do you think she’ll blame?”
Wanda stays silent for a moment. Of course it’s not your fault, but knowing what she knows about your mother, it’s pretty obvious that she’ll find a way to make you responsible.
“Can I speak to her, please?”
“Jenny, Y/N wants to speak to you” Wanda says, passing the phone to your sister.
“I’m so sorry” it’s the first thing she says, which keeps your mouth shut. “She canceled our trip, said I wasn’t going away to college that far from home. Y/N, she’s been so awful all the time. I just want to be away from her like you”
“Jenny…” you sigh. You honestly didn’t know. All this time, you thought the problem was you. You, who came to live with her new family and be an intruder into their life. The unwanted child that she was forced to take in.
“Look, does your dad know at least? I’m sure they’re worried about you”
“I left my phone back at home and took a bus”
“Ok, ask Wanda to text me your dad’s number so they’ll know where you are. I’ll see if I can get them to wait until tomorrow to pick you up, and we’ll talk when I’m home”
“Ok. I really am sorry” she says.
“I know, kid. I need to speak to Wanda again”
While she hands over the phone, you take a second to breathe, trying to ease your nerves.
“Wands, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to involve you in all of this. I’ll find a way to leave work and take her to a hotel or something…”
“Detka” Wanda interrupts you. “Stay. Do what you have to do. I can take care of things here. We’re a team. We do this together”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes. We’ll see you for dinner, ok?”
“Thank you”
“Anything for you” she says with a gentle tone, hanging up.
—
It feels like it’s been a week instead of a couple of hours. The ER was packed, Natasha’s patient had some complications and now you had to prepare to face your mother.
“Hey” Wanda walks out the second she hears your car. Your face says it all, so she skips the part where she asks how you’re doing.
“They’re picking her up tomorrow at noon” is all you say, allowing Wanda to hug you, and placing your head against her shoulder. You breathe deeply, trying to ease your nerves.
“She’s playing with the twins now. Come on” Wanda takes your hand to lead you back inside, but you stay rooted in your spot.
“I haven’t seen her in ten years… I don’t even know what to say to her”
“Maybe she needs someone who listens and understands what she’s going through. Come on, you’ve got this, detka” she insists, careesing your cheek.
“Wanda, I can’t thank you enough. I don’t know what I would have done without you”
Those words, coupled with the look of complete adoration you’re giving her, is enough to soothe her soul and make Wanda forget all those fears about not being enough for you.
Jenny’s sitting at the kitchen counter, speaking to Tommy and Billy.
“They’re very curious about your sister”
“Yeah, well, so am I”
Hearing the door close, your sister turns around, and you stare at each other for a moment. It makes your heart ache, to see her all grown up. Last time you saw Jenny she was seven.
Setting boundaries with your mother came at the cost of watching your siblings grow.
“Hey, kids” you say. Tommy and Billy run to greet you, and you kiss their heads. “My minions”
“Hi” Jenny says, standing up and looking at you. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get you in trouble”
“Let’s walk Sparky” you propose, grabbing his leash. The dog knows exactly what that means, and he starts jumping around. “We’ll be back in a bit”
“Ok, sweetheart” Wanda smiles.
“They seem nice” Jenny comments when you walk down the street.
“Yeah, they are. I’m very lucky to have them”
“I didn’t know…”
“I know, I’m sorry. I try to keep these things to myself. Your mother would find a way to ruin it”
“Of course” she says, fidgeting with her hands.
“I spoke to your dad. They agreed to fly tomorrow and pick you up at the hospital. He wasn’t mad, just worried”
“He’s not the one I have a problem with” she huffs. “Dad’s not even happy with her, but he thinks we’ll be traumatized if they get a divorce”
Sparky wants to chase after a cat and you let his barking fill the silence for a while.
“So what’s the plan here? You want to be away from her?”
“I just… can’t breathe anymore. She’s cruel and manipulative and controling. Sometimes I feel like the only way to make it stop is by never speaking to her again”
“Yeah, that sounds familiar. In my case it was easier, she was very eager for me to leave and never come back” you point out, starting to head back home. “I don’t think that will be the case with you”
“Well, maybe I should simply stop talking to her at all” Jenny says.
“Listen, ask your dad for support. Maybe there’s a way to find a middle ground. Because it’s not an easy thing, kid. You’re alone for a lot of the time. I can try and help, but with work and everything else… leaving home and cutting her off will mean a lot of changes. That’s all I’m saying”
“I know” she nods, her voice lower than before.
“Come on, I’m starving” you open the door, letting Sparky run towards the kitchen.
Dinner is spent talking about your sister, and she’s happy to chat with the kids. There’s an awkward pause when they ask about how you were growing up.
“Guys, Jenny was just a baby, she doesn’t remember a lot. What I can tell you is she cried every time she watched Finding Nemo”
“I did not!” she snaps and you hold a laugh. “I only cried because you played it all the time and I was sick of it”
“Yeah, yeah”
“Pietro cried when we watched Snowhite” Wanda intervenes and now, you do let out the loudest lauh.
“Hey, I’m just here minding my business, why are you attacking me?” he says, though he gives Wanda a playful smile.
It’s nice to see Jenny so comfortable, and definitely more relaxed than before. But you know that’s the way Wanda can get to people. She has the talent of making you feel like you belong without trying.
As you look at your girlfriend from across the table, laughing and chatting with your sister, you remember the ring you’re getting in a couple of days. And honestly, it doesn’t matter how you propose, you just hope Wanda wants to be with you forever.
Jenny helps with the dishes, and you recognise that eagerness to be useful in the way you used to clean every surface of your mother’s house, to at least be considered less of a burden. So, you offer to split the work.
“It’s fine, kiddo” you reassure her when she protests.
“I’m almost 18” she challenges you and you let out a laugh.
“Oh, yeah, to be 18 and think I know everything. I’m your big sister. You’re always gonna be a baby to me”
You both work in silence, until Jenny speaks again.
“I remember some stuff. Not a lot, but enough to know how unfair she was to you. But you were never unkind to me. Or Zach”
“It wasn’t your fault. Whatever shit that woman had going on with me was between us two” Jenny snorts at that. “Oh, fuck, pretend you didn’t hear me curse”
“You just did again!”
“No, fuck my life, I already owe like 30 bucks to the swear jar” you hiss, making Jenny laugh again. You throw some water her way, and you engage in a soap war.
“Nu-uh, no mess in my kitchen. I like to keep it clean” Wanda interrupts, scolding you.
“Oh, babe, come on. It’s not like we’ve never had se…”
“Y/N!” she slaps your shoulder. “Do not give this young woman the wrong impression about me. Jenny, we have a full house, but I made the couch as comfortable as possible”
“That’s ok, it’s way better than a bus seat” your sister smiles. “Goodnight and thank you for everything”
“Night, kid” you say, letting out a sigh when she leaves the kitchen. You turn to Wanda, pulling her by the waist and holding her impossibly close. “Thank you for everything. You kept calm and were kind to her. I don’t deserve you”
“You make it sound like I’m perfect”
“You are” you say with complete devotion, kissing her cheek. “I’m not ready for tomorrow, Wanda”
“We’ll do it together” she kisses your shoulder, but you shake your head.
“I don’t want that horrible woman anywhere near you. I’ll come back to pick up Jenny and hand her over to the parents at the hospital”
“Come back? Are you going to the hospital now?” she says.
“I’ll be restless and overthinking… I think only work can get me through this night” you sigh.
“Ok, if that’s what you need to do” Wanda agrees, but you catch the hurt in her eyes. “I’ll go back to working on some sketches, then”
She’s about to leave the kitchen when you change your mind.
“Can I watch you work? I think that would help me”
“Yes, of course” Wanda smiles, reaching for your hand. You pause before the door, kissing her softly.
“Love you”
Jenny is fast asleep when you walk past her.
You settle in Wanda’s study, getting cozy in the small sofa while she takes a seat and works on her drafting table.
Her soft movements lull you, and before you can tell, you’re fast asleep.
Wanda watches as you rest, hoping you can finally have a peaceful night.
—
The drive to the hospital is quiet.
Wanda said goodbye to Jenny with a hug, and a reminder that she’s always welcomed in your home.
But now it’s only the two of you in the car, and you don’t really know how to comfort her.
“If I were to go to college close to Westview… could I visit? I know you’re busy with work and your family, I’m just thinking…”
“Jenny, of course you can. You heard Wanda”
“I’m scared” she admits when you park, and you stay inside the car for a minute longer.
“Look, she’ll probably blame me. So, let her. Don’t argue or defend me” you advise. “She can’t hurt me, not anymore”
Jenny nods, and follows you as you leave the parking lot. Darcy is waiting for you in the lobby.
“Hi, Jenny” she greets. Darcy’s the only one of your friends who knows your family. It was during the only time they visited on campus and Darcy made sure your mother knew she didn’t like her.
“Hey” the girl greets, shyly.
“I have to make my rounds, but Darcy will spend some time with you in the cafeteria and then you can wait in the break room”
Fortunately, the night shift wasn’t so chaotic and Natasha’s patient seems to be stable.
Seems like Natasha went home right after you, so she might be back anytime now. Either way, you keep working until your phone rings.
“Hey, we’re here” Jenny’s father says as you pick up the phone.
“Ok, wait outside. We don’t want her making a scene”
“Yeah” he hesitates and you know he’s just as worried. You’re about to hang up, but think twice.
“Ed, take care of them. They’re good kids”
Jenny isn’t thrilled when you come looking for her. As she walks besides you, you pull her into a hug.
“You’re a strong kid. It’s gonna be fine” you say, and she holds on to you tighter.
When you walk out of the hospital, your eyes meet your mother’s. How you wish you could say she doesn’t scare you anymore, but a part of you will always be a kid at the mercy of her twisted ways.
Jenny looks at you one last time before she walks up to her parents. If things were different, you’d never let her go back to such a horrible environment.
You prefer to look down until they’re gone.
Which is why you never see the blow coming.
Your mother slaps you across the face and your cheek and the skin around your eye burns.
“You poisoned her against me”
Even if you feel humiliated, you laugh, rubbing your face.
“Have you tried not being a fucking monster to your kids, for once?”
She aims again, but the slap doesn’t land. That’s when you look up, and watch as Natasha holds her wrist, glaring at the woman.
“I would think twice before doing this” Natasha threatens, and you figure her hold most be doing some harm, as your mother retreats her hand.
“You’re dead to me. Don’t ever try to contact me again” she hisses your way and you want to cry with relief. That’s the best thing she’s ever told you.
“I’m sorry” Jenny shouts, getting dragged away by her mother, Ed looking pissed at his wife.
To be fair, seems like her husband hates her guts too. Not that it’s difficult to do so.
“Are you ok?” Natasha turns to you, her hand on your cheek.
“I forgot about the big ass rings she’s always wearing” you try to joke, but you’re skin is still burning and it’s hard to open your left eye.
“Come on” Natasha takes your hand, leading you through the hospital halls until she finds an empty room. Quickly checking for any medical supplies she might need, Natasha comes back to sit next to you.
“Wanna talk about it?”
“I’m ok. Besides the slap”
“Yeah, it’s gonna leave a mark for a couple of days” Natasha mutters, checking that the skin is only a bit reddened.
“Nice. It will match the one I have on the back of my head from when she threw a glass at me” you try to joke, but Natasha stays silent.
“Can you open your eye?”
“I think so” you make an effort, blinking a couple of times. Natasha holds your chin, inspecting your pupil.
“It’s fine” she says, nodding. “We should probably put something cold so the swelling goes down, though”
“Ok” you nod. Natasha’s about to stand up when she catches the tears threatening to spill over.
“I’m here” she reassures you, holding your face with her hands.
“I failed her. I should have known… I should have stayed to protect her. But I left, because it was easier…”
“It’s not your responsibility. You were a kid too” she says, catching a tear that rolls down your cheek. “You’re kind and sweet, and a wonderful person. You didn’t let that woman poison you. That’s what matters”
Her words hit you like a wave, so you close your eyes and breath. You’re about to thank Natasha when you see it.
It’s a very brief moment, but you catch it.
Natasha staring at your lips.
Her hands are still on your cheeks, looking conflicted on what to do next. Pull apart and pretend it never happened? Lean forward and kiss you?
Natasha knows you caught her.
And you haven’t pulled back.
Pull back, pull back.
Whatever you were about to say is interrupted by your pager.
911.
Of course.
“I…”
“Yeah” Natasha nods, finally dropping her hands and standing up, her back to you. You grab the doorknob, but don’t turn it in your hands, heart still racing.
“Natasha” you say and she turns around, looking hopeful.
“Doctor Y/L/N, there you are” Kate walks in, but her eyes widen as she sees Natasha across the room. “I’m sorry, there’s an emergency. An accident in the bridge, multiple people hurt. We’re called onsite”
“Get everything ready and page Yelena” you ask. Kate nods, leaving the door open.
“I have to…” you say, looking back at Natasha.
“Be careful” is all the redhead says, smiling at you.
“Thank you. For what you did back there” you remember, smiling one last time as you leave the room.
It’s all a blur as you get ready to leave, packing bags with medical supplies. Your mind is elsewhere, especifically in that room with Natasha.
Would something have happened if it weren’t for Kate’s interruption?
“Hey” Yelena calls for you, and you snap out of those thoughts.
“Come on, you two. Lewis is running the ER; be in constant contact to alert about upcoming patients” Kate and Yelena follow you to the ambulance waiting, and you sit across from the blonde. “Alright, Belova. Let’s see what you’ve got”
--
There’s a reason not everyone can do this job.
Your team steps out of the ambulance and walks into pure chaos. At least ten cars have crashed against each other, while a bus impacted the railway.
“Driver of the bus lost consciousness. Crashed into the rail and other cars” Clint says as soon as you come into view. “We’re prioritizing the people on the bus, we don’t know how much damage there is on the rail and it can be dangerous”
“Kate, you can handle this, right?” you say, and the brunette nods, excited at the prospect of working solo. “Belova, you’re with me”
Yelena is overwhelmed, looking around at the people who are in shock or bleeding.
“Come on, we’re here to help, not stare”
“Yes, I’m sorry”
Clint’s team is helping everyone out of the bus and you walk up to the driver’s side. A car is blocking the door and he’s still unconscious.
“What do we do?” you ask Yelena.
“Check if he’s breathing”
“He is. And?”
“Check his pulse. Then we…”
“Immobilize neck and spine, place him on the back board and carry him out” you say. “You gotta go faster, Belova”
An EMT joins you, helping with the maneuvers until you’re out of the bus.
“Flail chest and hypoxia. I’m starting BVM” Yelena says, pulling out the equipment. She makes sure everything is in place before the ambulance leaves for Stark Hospital.
You keep working on more people, and the less critical injuries are redirected to Westview Medical Center. When you’re almost done, Kate asks for your help and you leave Yelena checking the vitals of an elderly man.
The blonde is exhausted, leaning against the railway and watching you work with Kate. The brunette has a lot more confidence in her movements and decisions, and Yelena tries to think that some day she’ll manage to be at that level of skill. As she looks down to the bridge, she notices a motorcycle. Leaning forward, she catches sight of a leg, noticing there’s a person trapped. She’s about to turn and ask for help, but you’re doing CPR while Kate struggles to stabilize a woman. The jump isn’t that bad, so she decides to go over the railing and land on the pile cap.
“Hello? Sir?” She shakes the man and searches for a pulse, but it’s obvious by his injuries that he’s dead. The question is how to go back to the bridge now. She tries to climb back using some of the loose parts of the rail, but she stumbles, making part of the structure fall close to her head.
“What’s that noise?” you ask, looking around. “Where’s Yelena?”
As you run around, searching for her, you hear a metallic crash and the splash of water.
“Yelena?!” you scream, looking everywhere for her. You spot her windbreaker stuck in the pier of the bridge.
“Do you think she fell in the water?”
“I don’t think, I know” you say, your heart dropping as you spot her getting carried away by the current, still unconscious. “Tell Clint to hurry up, because I really don’t wanna die today”
“Wait!”
But you’re already diving, and the cold water leaves you out of breath. It feels like your lungs are on fire when you gasp for air, and you have to use all your strength to not get dragged away from Yelena. Her bag is helping to keep her on the surface, though she’s not awake and you have no idea how long she’s been in the water.
It takes you a few minutes swimming against the current to reach her, and by the time you do, you’re exhausted.
“Come on, Yel” you say, keeping her head above the water. You’re not gonna be able to keep this up for much longer, and the bridge is looking further away every time you turn around.
If you survive this, you’re gonna propose to Wanda the next time you see her.
But as a wave hits you and you struggle to keep yourself and Yelena afloat, you think that’s a pretty massive if.
--
Natasha’s not a team player, that’s for sure. But the ER is a mess, and she knows it’s all hands on deck. So, she scrubs in, working with Darcy and Barnes to help everyone that comes in.
“We got the last one coming,” Darcy announces, picking up the phone. “Shit. Romanoff”
“What?” Natasha asks, although she’s afraid she knows the answer.
“Your sister, something happened… Y/N dived to rescue her, they both got dragged by the current” Darcy says, holding the phone against her ear. “Ambulance is five minutes away”
Natasha feels like throwing up. Those are the longest five minutes of her life, and Fury joins her as they wait for them to arrive.
“Female, twenties. Unconscious, hypothermic. Intubated and started oxygenation” Drax says as soon as the ambulance stops. Kate jumps out, running next to the gurney and holding on to Yelena.
“Kate, where’s…” Darcy says, and you jump out of the passenger seat, holding a blanket. You’re freezing, but alive.
“Here. I’m fine. She didn’t spend that much time underwater, I got to her soon”
“We need to stabilize her and raise temperature. You, stay here and let someone check you” Darcy says when she sees you getting ready to help.
Natasha is in the room with her sister, while Fury, Barnes and Darcy work. Taking a deep breath, you walk to the locker room to find dry clothes, and hopefully get a little warmer.
You honestly thought you’d both die out there, until Clint arrived in a boat that he stole from heaven knows where. Still, it was a close call.
Hopefully, Yelena will be alright.
Once you change into some dry scrubs, you notice there’s a gash in your arm. Sighing, you walk to a supply closet, looking for something to clean up the wound. Someone walks in and you turn around when the door slams behind them. Natasha looks at you, chest heaving.
“Is Yelena…?” you fear the worst.
But she doesn’t let you finish.
Natasha’s lips crash against yours, holding you by the neck and inviting you to explore her mouth. All you feel is the warmth of her body against yours, the passion she’s pouring into the kiss intoxicating and clouding your mind. Your hand goes around her waist to pull her closer…
Wanda.
The thought makes you open your eyes, and you pull back, out of breath. Natasha’s still holding on to you, and you almost get lost on her green eyes when someone else walks in.
Carol looks between you two, and Natasha turns around, hiding her face.
“Wanda’s here”
Your heart drops. Without looking back to Natasha, you leave the room, following Carol.
“Darcy called me. I was so worried” your girlfriend launches into your arms, her face against your chest. You try to control your shaking hands, arms going around her shoulders. “I’m so relieved that you’re ok”
In that moment, you turn your bodies around and your eyes meet Natasha’s.
You feel guilt, shame.
And something else.
A flutter in your chest at the memory of her lips on yours.
No, you’re definitely not ok.
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Linger| Spencer Reid
Summary: after Spencer calls it quits on your relationship, your friends decide to take you out to help you get over him, but the night doesn’t go as planned for them.
Content: Smut and the smallest amount of angst. 18+ fem!reader. mentions of drinking. Mentions of a breakup. Jealous Spencer. Hard dom Spencer. Sensory separation(handcuffs and blindfolds). Cum control. Pet names (princess, good girl, sir etc.) overstimulation. Spanking. Fingering. Reader is slightly bratty. (I think thats all but I could be wrong)
Masterlist|requests are open| navigation
Spencer had decided he no longer wanted to date you around four months ago, and it broke your heart. He didn’t give a good reason, he just said “it’s for the best.” The best for who exactly, because you had been wallowing in yourself pity for months now, making sure you never watched the news because you knew there was a possibility you would see his face. You hated him, but you still loved him.
“Come on, Spencer Reid is history now. He was lucky to have you. Please, please come out with us.” Your friend Ayla was practically begging you. She and your other friend Elle had been the friends you phoned when this first happened, they were the ones who had come over with wine, they had been the ones who would sleep next to you just to make sure you got some rest.
“Ayla, look at me, I am no state to go out looking like this.” You tried to act like you didn’t mind how you looked right now, but Ayla knew you better she could hear the pain in your voice. “We have plenty of time to get ready. Look remember how much fun you use to have before him, we can have that again. So, pretty please with a cherry on top.”
With a deep heavy sigh, you finally relented. You knew she was right, it was time to get out there again, to have fun again. “Fine, fine. I’ll come out with you guys, but if end up drunk crying over that man, please hit me or something.” You heard Ayla giggle, which made you start giggling too, and it felt good to feel a little happy again.
*
When Ayla and Elle arrived at your door, they both gasped in delight at the sight of you. "Wow, look at you! You look absolutely stunning," Elle exclaimed, her eyes wide with admiration.
“You know if I was a guy, I would totally be hitting on you right now.” Ayla chirped in, causing all of you to burst into laughter. “And tonight is all about us, about forgetting unnecessary drama and forgetting about men who treat us like shit.”
As you all stepped out into the cool night air, the city was alive with lights and laughter. The sound of music spilled out onto the streets, drawing you in like a magnet. Ayla linked her arm with yours, a mischievous glint in her eye.
"Tonight, we dance like nobody's watching," she declared, leading the way to the bustling club down the street. Elle danced ahead, her infectious energy lighting up the sidewalk. For the first time in months, you felt a spark of excitement ignite within you.
The pulsing beat of the music reverberated through your body as you stepped onto the crowded dance floor. Surrounded by strangers lost in their own rhythms, you let yourself be swept away by the music.
“Hey, I think that guy over there is checking you out.” Elle whispered in your ear, with her finger pointing to a tall, dark-haired man across the dance floor. You followed her gaze and felt a blush creep up your cheeks as you saw him smiling in your direction.
Ayla grinned mischievously and nudged you playfully. "Go talk to him! What have you got to lose?" she urged, her eyes twinkling with excitement.
Heart pounding, you took a deep breath and gathered your courage. With a final encouraging smile from your friends, you made your way through the crowd towards him. As you got closer, you could see his warm brown eyes twinkling with amusement.
"Hi there," you said, trying to keep your voice steady above the music. "I'm sorry to bother you, but my friends seem to think you've been checking me out."
The man chuckled, a charming smile lighting up his face. "Guilty as charged," he admitted, extending a hand towards you. "I'm Alex. Can I buy you a drink?"
“Hey Alex, I would love that.” Alex kept a hold of your hand a led you towards the bar. Alex was hot, charming and totally into you. You felt seen and admired, this is what you needed. But while talking to Alex, you felt eyes burning into you, you tried to ignore them, you thought it could just be the alcohol and nerves making you feel like that.
But you couldn’t ignore the feeling, so your eyes scanned around the club, you saw Elle flirting with someone, and Ayla dancing with someone. But no one was looking at. Alex noticed the change in your behaviour. “You, okay?” he placed his arm around you. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just thought someone was staring at us.” You whispered in his ear, which caused Alex to turn around and do the same thing you just did.
If Alex saw someone staring, he didn’t say anything, he just pulled you into a kiss. It was sweet, almost a loving kiss, but it was refreshing. But before you could kiss him again, you saw a hand tap Alex’s shoulder. As your eyes moved to see who it could be, you saw the face of the man you were trying to get over.
You felt Alex pull away from you as he turned to face Spencer, they were both roughly the same height, but Alex definitely had a bigger figure than Spencer. “Do we have a problem?” Alex asked, his voice calm but with an underlying tension. Spencer's expression was unreadable as he looked between you and Alex, his jaw clenched.
“Spencer, what are you doing here?” you chocked out. But Spencer didn’t reply, instead he seemed to be sizing Alex up. “Spencer what are you doing here? You break my heart, and now what? You want to make sure I never find love again, is that what you’re doing. Because if that’s what you are doing, what the hell is wrong with you?”
Alex looked back at you, “you know him?” He seemed confused, which he had every right to be. “Yeah, I do. He’s my ex, I didn’t know he’d be here. I’m sorry.” Your eyes pleaded with Alex to stay, you didn’t want to speak or look at Spencer anymore. But instead of staying, Alex just walked away, you could feel your eyes welling up.
“What the hell Spencer. Why would you do that?” you were angry, furious even. But Spencer didn’t seem to care.
His eyes bore into yours, cold and distant. "I just wanted to see if you had moved on," Spencer replied curtly, his voice devoid of any warmth. Anger simmered within you at his callous words and the audacity of his actions. How dare he show up here, disrupting your attempt to move forward?
"You have no right, Spencer. You walked away, remember?" Your voice trembled, why was he doing this to you.
Spencer's expression softened slightly, a flicker of regret crossing his features. "I know I messed up, okay? But I can't just stand by and watch you move on with someone else." His voice was strained, as if the words were being pulled from him against his will.
You shook your head in disbelief, incredulous at his selfishness. "That's not your decision to make, Spencer. You lost that right when you walked out on me without a word." The hurt and anger boiled within you, threatening to spill over.
“So, you thought I would be able to watch someone kiss you the way I use, huh? My tongue still remembers how you taste, and I couldn’t let someone else know that.” Spencer admitted.
"Your regret doesn't give you the right to disrupt my life, Spencer. I deserve to move on and find happiness, with or without you in the picture." Your voice rang out clear and strong, a declaration of independence from his toxic hold over you.
Spencer's eyes darkened as he realized his attempts to sway you were failing. "I still love you," he whispered, desperation lacing his words.
“You still love me? Prove it, Spencer. Show me how much you missed me.” You stared into his eyes. Spencer pulled you into him, his mouth was pressed against your ear, “it’s hot when you talk back.”
You knew you should push away from him, but you would be lying if this isn’t something you had thought about for months. While Spencer had hurt you, you still loved him, and you knew you always would. Spencer took control of the situation and kissed you. This was different to Alex’s, it was deep, possessive and somehow full of jealousy.
Spencer showed no signs of slowing the kissing down, he had gotten you back, but he knew that would never be an issue. Spencer would always be in control of you and your heart. He knew you would do absolutely anything he wanted; you were always going to Spencer’s, and he knew that.
“Spencer, please can we take this elsewhere because I don’t want to have sex with you in front of a group of strangers.” You whispered. Spencer's eyes gleamed with triumph as he led you away from the prying eyes on the dance floor, his grip possessive yet familiar.
“You know I’ve missed you begging, you were always such a good girl for me.” Spencer led you out of the club, he knew the way back to your house from here.
Once you were back at your apartment, Spencer continued to kiss you, his lips moved to the sweet spot on your neck, causing you to let out a soft moan. Spencer knew your body well. His hands were roaming your body, he had been dreaming about doing this to you again ever since the breakup. He loved the way your body melted for him, or how easily you would submit to him when he had a bad day at work.
He especially remembers how you use to great him in just your underwear, and you would allow him to take all his frustration out on you. He would love hearing you beg for him to let you cum, and he knew that tonight, he would finally have the chance to hear those words again. As he continued to explore your body, he whispered into your ear, "I'm going to make you forget about Alex, you're mine."
“I don’t think you’ll be able to make me forget about him, he was a pretty good kisser. I mean he was probably better than you.” You snipped back him, you were joking, but you wanted Spencer to be jealous again, it made him hot.
Spencer's eyes flashed with anger at your comment, but it was quickly replaced by a smirk as he realized you were attempting to provoke him. "Is that so?" he said, his voice low and threatening. "Well, we'll just have to see about that."
He pulled you closer, his body pressing against yours as he continued to explore your neck and shoulders with kisses. His touch was both gentle and assertive, reminding you of the power dynamics between the two of you.
You wanted to fight back this time; you couldn’t just let Spencer think he was always going to be the dominant one. "Oh really?" you challenged, your voice filled with bravado. Your heart was racing, adrenaline coursing through your veins as you felt the familiar thrill of competition between the two of you. “Spencer it’s okay not to be the best kisser in the world. I mean I’m sure Alex was better than you at most things. You know I bet I wouldn’t have been able to challenge him.”
Spencer grew tense at your words, his eyes flashing with anger, “do I look like I’m messing around? Do I look like I won’t punish you?”
You giggled at him, you knew what he was doing, but you weren’t going to let him win that easily. “You do look like you’re messing around Spencer.”
Spencer paused what he was going and stood up from the sofa. “Stand up, now.” Spencer snapped at you, but you didn’t. You just lay there staring at him. “I said, stand up now.” He spat out.
“Or what Spencer? What are you going to do?”
Spencer's eyes darkened as he took in your challenge, a dangerous glint present in his gaze. Without a word, he swiftly moved towards you, his strong hands gripping your wrists as he pulled you up from the sofa. The sudden forcefulness of his actions took you aback.
Spencer's voice was low and commanding as he spoke, "You think I won't follow through, sweetheart? You're testing my patience." His grip on your wrists tightened slightly, a silent warning of his dominance.
Your breath caught in your throat as Spencer's intensity washed over you, a combination of fear and anticipation swirling within you. "I'm not playing around, darling," Spencer's words were a promise and a threat all at once
He let go off your wrists and sat down. “Now undress and come lay over my lap.” Spencer ordered, and you knew better than to challenge him now.
“Yes, sir.” You spoke back in a gentle tone. You carefully undressed, your movements slow and deliberate. Once you were positioned over Spencer's lap, he wasted no time in spanking you. The initial sting of his hand on your bottom brought a mix of pain and embarrassment, but also a strange sense of exhilaration.
As he continued to spank you, his hand becoming more forceful with each strike, your body responded with arousal. Despite the discomfort, you couldn't deny the heat that was building between your legs.
He knew exactly how many strikes it took to bring you to the edge, and he relished in the power he held over your body. Your moans grew louder, your hips bucking against his hand with each strike as you pleaded with him for release.
Finally, Spencer stopped his spanking, his hand landing on your now-red bottom one final time, leaving a small sting behind. "You're going to pay for testing me, darling. You're going to beg for forgiveness.” Spencer picked you up, placing you over his shoulder.
He took you into your bedroom and placed you on the bed, but he wasn’t joining you just yet. He walked over to the bedside table and pulled open the draws to find all the toys and handcuffs exactly where they use to be.
He grabbed a silk blindfold and placed it over your eyes, the darkness suddenly enveloping you. "You're going to learn your place," he said, his voice low and menacing. "And I'm going to make sure you never forget it."
As he spoke, his hands were already at work, spreading your legs apart and exploring your most intimate parts. You could feel his fingers entering you, preparing you for what was to come. The sensation was both exhilarating and slightly frightening, as he continued to command and control your body in a way that both scared and aroused you.
Spencer's voice was dominant and unyielding as he spoke, "Do you understand, darling? This is punishment for testing me."
You moaned out a “yes, sir.”
Spencer's fingers moved within you, teasing and exploring. He was asserting his dominance, reminding you of what he could do to you - and what you craved from him.
"Good," he said, his voice low and full of promise. “Oh, and princess, you’re not allowed to cum until I give you permission, okay?”
You nodded, unable to form words. You felt Spencer leave you, before you felt the cold metal of handcuffs been placed around your wrists.
In the darkness, you could hear your own breaths becoming shallow, anticipation building. Your heart raced at the thought of what Spencer had planned for you. Your body trembled with a mix of fear and excitement, as you waited for his next move.
Spencer's footsteps stopped just beside you, and then you felt his weight on the bed as he positioned himself between your legs. The coolness gave way to a warmth that spread through your body, heating up every nerve ending until your entire being seemed to shudder.
Suddenly, he entered you. His slow, deliberate movements felt like a punishment, but they also felt incredible. You clenched around him, unable to help yourself, and moaned softly as pleasure washed over you.
"Patience, darling," Spencer whispered into your ear. "You're not allowed to cum yet."
You whimpered, the anticipation building within you. You felt like you were going to burst at the seams. The feelings coursing through your body were unbearable. You tried to resist, but it was no use. Your hips began to buck against Spencer's movements, trying to find relief in the most forbidden way.
"Spencer, please," you begged, your voice ever so slightly unsteady. "I can't take it anymore."
Spencer's breath hitched in his throat at your words, his body tightening around you. He knew that he had control over your pleasure, and he was going to use it to his advantage.
"You're going to have to wait, my dear," Spencer murmured, his voice low and full of promise. "I'm not done with you yet." His movements became more intense, a mixture of dominance and care evident in his touch.
Your moans grew louder, your body arching against him as he continued to tease and taunt you. Each thrust brought you closer and closer to the edge, but still he refused to let you cum.
Finally, when you were sure you could take no more, he pulled out of you suddenly, leaving you panting and gasping for air. You whimpered in protest, but he ignored your pleas.
Instead, he reached for a vibrator from the bedside table and turned it on. The vibrations hummed through the air.
"I'm not done with you yet," he growled, his voice low and dangerous. "You're going to learn your place."
He pressed the vibrator against your straining clit, sending an electric current of pleasure through you. Your hips bucked against the vibrator, desperate for relief. You felt like you were on the edge of something incredible, but still he denied you.
"Please," you begged again, your voice hoarse with desire. "Please let me cum."
Spencer laughed cruelly, his hand never stopping its ministrations. "Not yet, my dear. Not until I say so."
Your body trembled with need, and you moaned in frustration as he continued to tease you.
"Spencer, please!" You cried out, your voice shaking with both desperation and arousal. "I need you to let me cum!"
Spencer chuckled darkly, the sound making your heart race. His hand never stopped its movements, torturing you further with each pass of the vibrator against your sensitive clit.
"Not yet," he murmured, his voice low and sinister. "You're not allowed to cum until I say so."
The thought that you had no control over your own pleasure made your body tremble even more. Your hips bucked against him, desperate for relief. You couldn't help but moan out in frustration as he continued to deny you.
Finally, when you thought you couldn't take it anymore, Spencer stopped his ministrations abruptly. You whimpered in protest, but he ignored you.
He reached down and positioned the vibrator at your entrance, pushing it gently inside you. The feeling of fullness was overwhelming, but still, you could not find release. His fingers teased your clit, sending a wave of pleasure through you.
You felt like you were on the edge of something incredible, but still he denied you. You begged him to let you cum, promising to be a good girl from now on. But Spencer just laughed, his hand never stopping its ministrations.
"Spencer, please! I promise I'll be good!" you cried out, your voice hoarse with desperation. "Please let me cum!"
“Say it again, beg for it.” He commanded.
“Please Spencer, please let me cum.” You paused, you knew this wouldn’t be good enough for him, “please, I’ll be your good girl forever. Please.” You were begging, and not that he could see, but your eyes were starting to water.
Spencer's hand slowed, the vibrations fading away. He let out a low growl of desire as you begged, your desperation evident in every shaky breath and quivering moan. Your words had the desired effect.
"There's a good girl," he whispered, his voice thick with lust. "Now say it one more time, and I'll let you cum."
"Please Spencer, please let me cum," you begged, your voice wavering. "I'll be your good girl forever."
Spencer finally let you cum, his fingers and vibrator working in perfect harmony to send you over the edge. The sensations coursing through your body were unbearable, the relief and release that you had been craving for so long finally came crashing down on you like a wave.
He turned the vibrator off and took off your blindfold. “We are far from done, but I am going to go get you some water, so we can continue. Okay?” You nodded, still catching your breath from the intensity of the experience.
~join my taglist~
~taglist~
@iluvreid @nomajdetective @evvy96 @oliviah-25 @emalynvtgtgfhvgg @krokietino @xohoneybun @purplepistachi0 @pleasantwitchgarden @bitchassbecky691 @gemofthenight @beth-gallagher22 @keiva1000 @firstunmannedflyingdeskset @matthew-gray-gubler-lover @r-3dlips @keiva1000 @peppersapro @just-a-harmless-patato @spenxerslut @skulliecadaver-blog @lover-of-books-and-tea @khxna @jem08 @ladylincoln @khxna @karenfrancoespinosa-blog @niktwazny303 @sleepysongbirdsings @spicyspirit @etanordoesbullsh1t @ofagathachristies @18lkpeters @bellasprettywords
#spencer reid smut#dr spencer reid#criminal minds#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x y/n#spencer reid#spencer reid x fem!reader#spencer reid x you#spencer reid fluff#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds smut#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid angst#spencer reid fanfiction#spencer reid criminal minds#doctor spencer reid#spence reid
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Okay here‘s the full story: a thing my super religious school would do was host church services every wednesday, they even had their own little chapel in the school.
Anyway every time i was in that room i felt lightheaded and left early multiple times bc of it.
About 5 years into being at that school we hit some milestone i can’t remember and we held an exceptionally important service. We were advised not to leave if possible. 14/15 yo me of course thought that meant stay even if you die.
Because the service was so important it was also much longer than usual, it might’ve been 3 hours, although i‘m not sure it just felt incredibly long.
The same shortness of breath almost instantly hit me when entering the room, but this time i really had to thug it out. About halfway through they went around once again burning some pf the sacrificial incense, i think it was the second time at that point.
Shortly after I felt very lightheaded (I also hadn’t eaten or drank beforehand bc i wanted to make sure i wouldn’t have to go to the bathroom) and it kept getting worse. I couldn’t concentrate on anything being said around me, but the organ was hammering through my skull. It felt like i was right next to it, but it was across the room.
Everything got muffled, i felt dizzy and i couldn’t place where my body parts were in this three dimensional space.
And suddenly the muffling got louder and through it a voice emerged. It was incredibly low and sent vibrations from one ear to the other. I don’t fully remember what it said to me, but it was something to the effect of „don’t let this be your ending. You owe the world“.
I must’ve picked myself back up after the service because i found myself skipping class in the medical room (unoccupied). I stayed there a while and felt normal again after a bit. I think i went to maths class after lol.
Take this as one of my memories, I might be mixing up multiple events lmao but basically this is why i thought i heard god and got delusional
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onlyangel4 1k event - P7. DR3. SMAU.
trope: fluff comfort
pairing: daniel ricciardo x long term girlfriend
faceclaim: josephine skriver
1k event
y/ninsta posted a story
written: how is this an airport?
danielricciardo posted a story tagging y/ninsta
written: back with my girl
y/ninsta posted a story tagging danielricciardo
y/ninsta posted a story
written: ready for you singapore (even if night races are way past my bedtime)
danielricciardofan
liked by user1, user2, user3 and 21,102 others
danielricciardofan: all the content from this weekend makes me think that all the rumours about daniel leaving f1 are true
y/n ran into his arms sobbing post race, if this is true i am genuinely heartbroken but i know our daniel will be onto bigger and better things
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user1: the video of y/n crying in the garage is going to be ingrained into my memory forever
user2: i am truly devastated if this is the truth
user3: this is so heartbreaking
y/ninsta posted a story
written: so so proud
f1
liked by user4, user5, user6 and 2,001,102 others
f1: BREAKING: daniel ricciardo to leave RB
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user4: he deserved a better goodbye
user5: danny ric leaving f1 by getting the fastest lap point from lando just sums up the kind of guy he is
user6: i'm going to miss him so much
y/ninsta
liked by alexandrasaintmleus, kellypiquet, danielricciardo and 1,202,283 others
tagged: danielricciardo
y/ninsta: my future
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alexandrasaintmleux: so so happy for you my love
y/ninsta: miss you al
kellypiquet: already picking my outfit for the wedding of the century
danielricciardo: can't wait to force you to be in my life forever
y/ninsta: i was going to be in your life forever ring or no ring
maxverstappen: i still remember convincing daniel to grow balls and ask you out, my my does time fly
y/ninsta: still convinced we would still be pining after each other if you didn't give him a pep talk
user7: mum and dad go offline for months and then come back with this news, that is nuts
user8: this is my royal wedding
user9: i'm actually crying, finally some good dr3 news
danielricciardo posted a story tagging y/ninsta
written: this is what y/n was wearing the night i proposed, can you blame me for dropping to my knees
alexandrasaintmleux posted a story tagging y/ninsta
written: of course y/n had to have the most aesthetic hen do ever
kellypiquet posted a story tagging y/ninsta
written: girls night to celebrate my girl
y/ninsta posted a story tagging kellypiquet, alexandrasaintmleux, flavybarla and francisca.gomes
written: ofc i had a pj party hen do, wouldn't have it any other way
y/ninsta
liked by danielricciardo, landonorris, alexandrasaintmleux and 3,872,485 others
tagged: danielricciardo. vogue.
y/ninsta: two months ago i got to marry the love of my life at my dream wedding ceremony, a massive thank you to vogue for capturing my perfect day
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danielricciardo: how dare you not include the picture of me doing a shoey
y/ninsta: i'm afraid that didn't fit the aesthetic my love
landonorris: the best night ever
y/ninsta: i'm surprised you can remember it you were singing taylor swift karaoke with my husband at 4am
alexandrasaintmleux: the prettiest bride
y/ninsta: only because you did my make up pretty girl
kellypiquet: crying looking at these photos
y/ninsta: stop kel you'll make me cry
user10: i'm so happy they found joy in such a difficult time after he got dropped
user11: the royal wedding happened and we had no idea
user12: i'm so so happy for you both
user13: your dress is stunning oh my god
danielricciardo posted a story tagging y/ninsta
written: wifey
∘•···············•∘ʚ ♡ ɞ∘•················•∘
@bibissparkles
@milkysoop
@hadids-world
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#f1#f1 x reader#f1 fanfic#f1 smau#formula 1 smau#f1 fandom#formula one smau#formula 1#formula one#dr3 smau#dr3#dr3 x reader#dr3 social media au#daniel ricciardo#daniel ricciardo x reader#daniel ricciardo fanfic#daniel ricciardo fluff#daniel ricciardo smau#daniel ricciardo social media au#f1 social media au
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honey, on your knees (when you look at me)
pairing: agatha harkness x fem reader
summary: even though your job mostly consists of taking rich, arrogant lawyer's coffee orders, you're still grateful for the opportunity to work at such a prestigious firm. especially considering that your boss, agatha, is the hottest woman you've ever seen.
contents: g!p agatha, dirty talk, degradation, oral (agatha receiving), talk of breeding
An angel must've blessed you for you to receive this internship, you think when you glance over to a table where a few lawyers have gathered to look over some documents together.
Amidst them, Agatha Harkness stands in all her glory, wearing a dark blue tailored pantsuit and looking gorgeous as ever, discussing points in whatever papers they were reviewing.
It's been two glorious weeks at the law firm, and despite your days mostly consisted of going on coffee runs, you wouldn't trade it for anything. The past few weeks here have been absolute heaven, thanks to your boss, Agatha Harkness.
An infamously ruthless lawyer, winning case after case and building a hugely successful career for herself—also, the hottest woman you've ever seen in your entire life. Every chance you get, you look at her in awe, admiring veiny hands and piercing blue eyes.
And sometimes, she stares back.
Right then, her voice cuts through the noise in the office: "Your level of incompetence is fucking baffling."
You eye her again, Though she's never particularly kind or open-hearted, today the tension around her seems much thicker. Interrupting stuttered apologies by some employee, Agatha lets out a scoff and leaves for her office: "Someone deal with this, if I have to be subjected to your ineptitude any longer I'll have lawsuit on my hands."
You smirk to yourself. She does seem very stressed by all this...you look around the office. No one's paying attention to you.
Doesn't look like anyone needs coffee right now.
While the group is still frantically going over the papers, you should probably care more about the actual work being done here, you make your way to her office practically unnoticed. That's one of the benefits of being an intern—no one pays attention to you. You're invisible, a ghost.
To most, at least. More than once, you've caught Agatha staring at you, giving you a smirk or winking at you—so this couldn't hurt, right? You'll just ask her if she needs anything. Nothing scandalous about it.
Obviously, her office is the biggest of the building. Once you've reached it, you take a deep breath and knock. After there's no answer, you knock once more: "Miss Harkness? May I come in?"
A sharp groan follows and she yells something you hope is "Come on in!", but very likely isn't.
Her gaze immediately softens at the sight of you, though, and she expectantly waves a hand: "How can I help you? y/n, is it?"
"Yes," you reply, surprised and proud at the same time that she remembered your name. The door falls shut behind you.
"I was just wondering if there's anything you need. You seem a bit stressed..."
"I'm not stressed, I just work with idiot apes."
You give her a soft laugh, then shrug your shoulders: "So, coffee? Or...anything?"
She raises her brow at that, even giving you an amused smirk: "Or anything?"
You avert your gaze, looking down at the floor and smiling timidly: "Just...I don't know."
"I'm afraid I don't know, either. Are you sure you don't want to explain it to me?"
The atmosphere in the room changes almost instantly.
Agatha leans back in her chair, and you hear your heart pounding: "Or would you like me to tell you what I think you're talking about?"
You nod immediately. She laughs, slowly getting up from her chair. The sight you're presented with is like right out of a fucking dream—she's hard.
"Fuck," you mutter under your breath when she stalks towards you, leaning back against her desk in front of you.
One hand grips the edge of her desk, while her other one slowly makes its way down, grabbing her crotch through her pants. You let out a shaky breath.
"I think," she says, unzipping her pants, "you want to get on your knees and suck my cock. Stress relief, right?"
It's almost embarrassing how fast you fall to your knees in front of her. She laughs again, holding out her hand for you to take. You do, and she slowly leads it to her crotch.
Carefully, you touch her hard cock over the fabric of her pants, mouth watering at the feeling of her twitch in your hand.
A low groan from above you makes you look up—that fucking smirk is going to be the death of you. Is this really happening?
"May I?"
You don't specify what you're asking permission for, but both of you know and Agatha quickly nods, pressing herself further into the desk and gripping its edges when you unzip her pants, only pulling them down to her thighs and sliding down her panties, cock springing free. Oh. She's big.
Curious, you run your fingers along her length before carefully grabbing it and giving her a few light pumps, each making her let out a little groan—with the way she's pushing herself further into the desk and gripping its edges, you figure she needs this really bad.
And though you want nothing more than to help her with her frustration, it's intimidating. She is big, really big, and it's your first time doing anything like this.
You stroke her cock again a few more times, mouth mere inches from it, when Agatha moves her right hand into your hair and tugs lightly, muttering in a low, hushed voice: "Suddenly so shy..."
You don't look up, completely transfixed by her cock, and give her a small, hesitant smile: "You're big."
She hums noncommittally, fingers curling in your hair while her free hand moves down, perfectly manicured fingers barely fitting around her own cock and taking over for you, stroking herself: "You've wanted this for ages, haven't you?"
"Since I started here," you admit, looking up at her through your eyelashes.
At that, she smirks.
"Come on. Be a good girl for me and open up, honey."
For a second, you're hit with a wave of insecurity—you'd never done something like this, and you absolutely could not afford doing a bad job at pleasing Agatha—but the sultry tone of her voice, her darkened eyes, they make the worries wash away on a whim, replacing them with a desire to please her, through whatever means necessary.
You scoot closer to her and make a mental note to thank her about the soft carpet in her office later, opening your mouth and sticking your tongue out to start by giving her a few kitten licks.
But before you can realize what's happening, she puts her other hand on the back of your head and pushes hard, pushes you onto herself fast until her cock hits the back of your throat—you barely even register what just happened and gag immediately, put your hands on her thighs and push to try and get yourself off of her, but she's relentless, holding your head with her hands and releasing a low growl.
Tears begin to run down your face automatically, God, the stretch fucking hurts, you feel like you can't breathe—what the fuck is she doing? Again, you try to push yourself away, but Agatha remains firm: "Shh, shh, calm down...let me take the lead, okay?"
You look up at her, eyebrows knitted together, as you struggle to understand while letting out muffled sobs and trying to breathe through your nose.
Agatha lets out a dark chuckle, bringing her thumbs to her face to wipe your tears away. Her previous kind demeanor has disappeared into thin air.
"Bold little cockslut, coming into my office practically begging me to fuck her...teasing me all week. You've had this coming."
Just then, she thrusts her hips forwards—again, you choke and gag, fuck, the tears don't stop, while Agatha doesn't seem concerned in the slightest, muttering things incomprehensible to you and continuing to fuck your throat.
"Walking around like a little whore, shoving your tits in my face, giving me blowjob eyes every time I fucking look your way—wanted to bend you over my desk and fuck your cunt the first time I saw you, fill you up, make you take it," she accentuates the last words with particularly rough thrusts.
You let out a pained sob, her fingernails pressing into your skin.
"I know you're getting off on it. I bet you love this," she purrs, before letting out another moan, "How many times have you fucked yourself to the thought of this?"
A whine escapes you, and you wouldn't have answered her question even if you were able to, simply because the answer was too humiliating.
You accept your fate when breathing through your nose gets easier, and you put your hands on the back of her thighs. She smiles cruelly through her panting: "Bet you'd like that, if I filled you up and bred you. Crying like you don't know what you've been doing."
As embarrassing as it is, her words go straight to your core and you groan against her, vibrations causing her to, as well.
Somewhere in the back of your mind, you think about how neither of you had locked the door. She fucks the worries out of you with another hard thrust, a burning sensation in your throat you can't be bothered to lament right now.
"Fuck," she pants, "I might have to keep you. My personal little fucktoy."
Your eyes roll back in your head at the thought. This is humiliating, but you're unbelievably turned on despite it...okay, maybe because of it.
Agatha's thrusts are getting shallower and faster, and her groans louder, she must be so close—fuck it, you think, and for a moment, you consider shoving a hand down your skirt and getting yourself off, but decide against it. You must be fucking dripping, the pain of her assault on your throat doing something to you that you can't even describe.
Another loud moan escapes her, sweat glistening on her skin (you don't dare to imagine what you must look like right now), and you're prepared to take her cum—when instead, she all of a sudden pulls you off of her with one hand, spitting into her other one and then putting it around her cock again.
You can't stop yourself from coughing, nearly doubling over, until she fists her hand in your hair and pulls you up, still stroking her length: "Keep your mouth open, tongue out."
Tears are still running down your face, but you do as she says without hesitation, sticking your tongue out while she jerks herself off, biting her lower lip to keep quiet.
When Agatha cums with a surprisingly high-pitched whimper, she does it all over your face, tongue and neck. You don't move until she slumps back against her desk and lets go of your hair, panting heavily with her head thrown back.
After maybe a minute of her breathing being the only sound in the room, she lets out a weak laugh and pulls her underwear and pants back up: "Fuck. I really needed that. Thank you, honey."
You swallow, her cum a whole new flavor you can already feel yourself getting addicted to, and exhale shakily: "Holy fuck."
Your brain feels fuzzy. Maybe it's lack of oxygen or maybe it's the sensation of your fantasies starring a hot, powerful, middle-aged woman coming true, but one thing is certain: you're not sure how you're supposed to be able to sleep with anyone else ever again.
"Enjoyed that, huh?," she teases, before adding: "You can get off your knees now."
"I...genuinely don't think I can move."
There's a glint of something in her eyes. You can't quite place what it is. She's still smiling when she returns to the other side of her desk and gets something from one of her drawers. It's a box of wet wipes. You snort: "Need those a lot?"
"Not often. And rarely ever with interns," she gets out a wet wipe and hands it to you. You accept it gratefully.
"I'm not the first one?"
She laughs a little: "Not the first. But definitely the prettiest...get on the couch."
You raise an eyebrow at her request.
She smirks again: "Baby, don't pretend you're not soaked...come on. Don't forget, I'm an amazing, generous boss."
#theo writes#agatha all along#agatha harkness#agatha harkness x reader#kathryn hahn#kathryn hahn x reader
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dancing through our house with the ghost of you ; c. hyunju
part one | request guide | masterlist
summary: how easy is for a person to disappear from the face of the earth?
cw: angst ; comfort ; cho hyunju x fem!reader ; no use of y/n
wc: 1.9k
a/n: CALIOPE'S ON FIRE, i made this one while listening to baile inolvidable by bad bunny and honestly i need to do another os about that song, so let's say it's inspired by ghost of you by 5sos HOPE Y'ALL ENJOY IT :D
small taglist : @etta-huracan hope u like it <33
The night surrounding you was quiet, the whistle of the cold air was making you company alongside the small mumbles of a melody that had been stuck in your head for quite some time now. Your nose felt so cold against the skin of your hand when you gently scrubbed it, now sitting on a bench in the park you opened the new soju bottle and lifted it up a little over your face.
“Got this with my first paycheck,” you said to the night sky with a tired smile. “Cheers, Hyun! This is for us.” a big chug of the liquor was poured on your mouth followed by a grunt by the sudden strong flavour.
You have lost track of the time your friend has been gone, at some point between the second week and first month your feelings just… Numbed themselves. You stopped bursting in tears when the memory of her haunted you, her clothes had all ran out of her scent, the detective had closed the case after a while of not getting new clues on the woman’s whereabouts, it felt like life was punching you over and over to the point of leaving you completely on the floor bleeding yourself out with nostalgia, anger and impotence to the whole situation. By that time you didn’t even make the effort to get back on your feet, you were just tired of everything and everyone that you’d decided to stop caring, act like you were getting yourself together and pretend to move on to trick your own heart that everything was okay.
You had gotten an underpaid job with crazy hours, but it was clear you were doing it to keep your mind off those thoughts. To keep you occupied from going back to your meaningless search for Hyunju, from spending money you clearly didn’t have on the same answers you knew you’d get: she vanished.
“I saw Onion today,” you talked again now referring to a stray cat Hyunju and you took care of everytime you see him, giving him the name ‘onion’ after you had found him with an onion peel on his head. “He’s just as cute as you remembered him… He even bumped his head against my leg.”
A sour laugh came out of your mouth before taking another chug of soju, cleaning the excess with Hyunju’s hoodie. You tried to not let any tear leave your eyes. A sniff sounded on your nose, taking a deep breath in you tried to compose yourself. ‘For you’ you whispered and poured a little bit of Soju on the green grass, taking the last sip in one sit you stood up to walk back home.
You couldn’t even walk home with peace of mind, you passed through all the special places Hyunju and you had visited together, every corner, every alley carried at least one memory within.
“Alright… Would you still like me if I was.. A garbage bug?” you asked, sitting on the pavement with a bag of chips in your hand.
Hyunju laughed at your occurrence, how could you think more of those questions in just seconds? “Of course I would still like you if you were a garbage bug.”
“A fly?” you asked, taking a chip in your mouth, Hyunju turned to look at you for a second. Sweet eyes analyzed your face with such love.
“I may need to think about it, I don’t like flies.” her nose shrugged a little and when you made a surprised grimace she bursted out laughing.
“I knew it, you hate me.” you said, faking a cry.
In your chest a feeling of heaviness installed making it hard to breathe calmly as you were doing. You felt a knot forming on your throat, it hurt so bad, everything hurt that you had to stay still for a moment to let the pain pass.
“Hey, are you okay?” the woman’s voice called for you, you turned to look at her with a small smile on your lips.
“I’m fine, Hyun. I just feel like I’m running out of air.” you answered while relying on a wall with your hand on your forehead.
“Okay, come here.” she took your hand and made you walk a couple of steps to the alley, carefully she took off your coat to feel the cold air on your skin. “Let’s breathe together, okay?”
However you could you nodded and tried to follow her lead, she took your hand and placed it over her chest, making you feel her heartbeat and breath. Small ‘there you go’ ‘you’re doing great’ came after every breath out.
“Better?” she asked you when you closed your eyes after a couple of exercises.
You nodded, looking at her directly now with watery eyes. “Thank you, truly.”
She smiled tenderly. “Any time, you know it.”
You stumbled on your own feet, falling to your knees and trying to catch your breath. It was almost past midnight so the street was all alone, you tried to recover yourself by thinking about how Hyunju showed you. You could almost hear her words praising you for doing the breathing exercises.
Life truly wasn’t fair with you. You sat on the street for a moment to let the tremble on your body die out, how were you supposed to continue with your life when everywhere you go you were reminded of Hyunju?
The next day you continued with your routine as usual, going to the convenience store early in the morning to change shifts with your co-worker. In the way you felt eyes following you, turning back and looking around you couldn’t see any soul near, thinking it was just another effect of the hangover you continued to walk.
Your shift went by surprisingly smoothly, by your clock out hour you took a couple of things home to make a little quick dinner, staying up all night was a bad idea when you had to work the next day so your plan was to simply eat and go to bed directly. When you opened the door of your apartment, the orange cat you saw last night came out to greet you with a couple of meows.
“Hey, Onion.” you greeted back smiling. “I guess I left the window open, huh?”
The orange cat rubbed himself on your legs before running back into the apartment. You took off your shoes and coat to go into the apartment.
A quiet hum caught your attention while you were walking over to the kitchen to prepare your cup of noodles, frowning you hurry a bit and the view made you drop the bag where you had your dinner and a new bottle of soju causing a sudden thunder that scared the woman on the kitchen, she turned to face you with her eyes a bit widened.
Her hands were holding a bowl of rice and the spoon to serve it, not a single word came out of either of you.
“The house looks like a mess.” she whispered, even with your gaze blurry due to the tears you could see her hands shake a little.
You giggle ironically. “That’s all you have to say?” your voice was pending in a thread, but even then you could confront her. “No ‘sorry for disappearing’? The house is a mess.”
“Honey,” she called you, Hyunju felt like you could hear her heart beating against her chest. “I know I went away–.”
“You disappeared overnight, Hyunju.” you interrupted her, your tears flowing without any permission. “I thought something bad had happened to you, I thought you were…” a hiccup cut off your comment. “That’s not fair, Hyunju.”
The woman left everything on the counter and was quick to walk your way to hug you. Just when you were in her arms and could feel her warmth surrounding you alongside that sweet scent you had forgotten about and it was just then and there that your brain completely understood that she was back. It wasn’t an illusion or a dream, Cho Hyunju was alive and back with you.
You allowed yourself to break while she held you, she didn’t mind your ugly cry or that you made the two sit on the kitchen floor when your legs gave up on you, she was just happy she was back from that hell of island safe, back to you in your little home you two had built together. Hyunju let you cry all the time you wanted, she knew you needed it so she let you while with one hand left circular caresses on your back and her voice every now and then let you know she was there, she was fine, she wouldn’t leave you again.
After a couple of minutes and leaving her shirt stained with your tears, you took your distance to look at her face, her eyes seemed a little bit worried when they met yours.
“Listen, I can explain–.” she tried to begin again, now being interrupted by your lips claiming her own.
At first her eyes widened at the sudden action, but not even a second later she gave in to the action, cupping your face on her own hands trying to deepen the gesture. She adored the way your lips had this mix of sweet flavor and a bit of salt thanks to the tears you had shed, your hands looked to lay on her thighs to be closer.
Maybe you would never know, but Hyunju had dreamt of this exact moment every night in the island, wishing to be with you and tell you how much she loved you, how much you mean to her, how even if you were to curse her, ask her to leave and never come back, she would still love the heck out of you. She had dreamt of the flavor of your lips, wondering if they would be soft despite you plucking bits of it when they were dry, she wondered who would mark the rhythm surprising herself when you took the lead and guide her, smiling to herself by the way your lips tasted hers like they have met each other before. Like they were made for each other.
When the lack of air made the two of you take your distance, her eyes inspected your face like the million times she had done before, brown colored eyes filled with love and desire that you missed to see, both hearts silently thanking the gods to finally be back with each other. Foreign thumbs caressed your face softly while also undoing the traces of dry tears that were staining your cheeks, she smiled softly.
“I’m just glad we are on the same page.” she spoke in a low tone only for you to hear. “I have so much I need to tell you, but I just want you to know right now that I love you. So much.”
Your own hand looked to rest on her arm and a sincere smile began to paint your face after so long. “I love you so much more, Hyunju…”
A small giggle vibrated on the woman’s chest, more than thrilled to hear those words come out of your mouth, feeling like she was floating. She would worry about the games and island later, that moment she took it to appreciate you, to look at you for every day she couldn’t do so. To love you like she always imagined she would do. Maybe a life threatening situation was what you two needed to finally confess your feelings for each other… Right?
#cho hyunju#cho hyun ju#squid game#cho hyun ju x reader#cho hyunju x reader#cho hyunju x you#player 120#player 120 x reader#hyun ju squid game#squid game x reader#fanfic#one shot
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“So,” Kon asked Tim the next day, “get anything on that star chart?”
“Not yet,” Tim said without looking up from his computer. “It was surprisingly thorough, so hopefully we'll get a hit soon. I'm worried he's from the other side of the galaxy or something, far enough away we don't have any local star charts.”
“That would make it hard,” Kon agreed with a sigh. “If that's the case, knowing a popular spec-fic show wouldn't help either.”
Tim shook his head. “Every bit of info you can get does help, just some more than others. But what I want to know is: what's this?” Tim looked up at Kon, pointing at where Danny had started writing.
“I think he was about to start labeling things, then suddenly gave up.”
Tim hummed as he squinted at the screen. “Well try to get his planet's name at least.”
“I think I can sneak that into a casual convo.” Kon knew exactly how he was going to sneak that in! It would be perfect!
☆☆☆
He watched another sunset with Danny, enjoying the wash of colors and the birds singing their goodnight before settling for the evening. He couldn't remember the last time he'd stop to watch a sunset before meeting Danny. It was nice to slow down and enjoy the scenery sometimes.
Once it was fully dark they laid out to stargaze again, Kon pointed out a few constellations and told Danny the stories behind them. “... and then of course that star there is Rao,” he said after talking about the constellation it was in.
“Rao?” Danny asked curiously, looking up at the star.
“Yup, it's the star my other home planet belonged to before it, you know… blew up.”
Danny turned his misty head to look at Kon incredulously. “Your other home planet?”
“Yeah, I was born here but,” Kon tried not to cringe, what he was about to say would feel really weird, “one of my parents is from there, from Krypton.”
“Oh, that's cool.” Danny smiled at Kon before turning his gaze back up. Kon expected him to be full of questions about Krypton blowing up, but it seemed Danny wasn't about to.
“I've never been to Krypton, it blew up before I was born.”
“That really sucks.”
Kon shrugged, he can't miss what he never knew. “What about your home planet? What's it called?”
Danny looked over and smirked. “Dirt.”
Kon sputtered, “Dirt?!”
Danny laughed and shifted to his side, half propped up to look over at Kon. “Read it in a sci-fi magazine once, since most people will name their home planet long before figuring planets out, usually it's just an old name for dirt.”
“What?” Kon was confused.
“What planet are we on now?”
“Earth.”
Danny laughed, “Exactly!”
“What? How does that,” Kon stopped. Earth was an old fashioned or poetic way of saying soil. Or as Danny put it: dirt. “Does Krypton mean dirt in Kryptonian?”
“I dunno, dude. You tell me.”
Kon huffed and let out a laugh. “Dirt!”
“Dirt,” Danny agreed as he lay back down.
☆☆☆
“Planet name's a bust, he said it just means dirt.”
“Most planet names do,” Tim said with a tired sigh.
“Is Krypton just dirt in old Kryptonian or something?”
“The most common element the mantle’s made of, actually. It'd be like if we renamed Earth to Iron. And then all that iron exploded and turned into radioactive ironite while hurtling through space.”
“I don't know how to feel about that. Hey! Wait, how do you know all that?”
Tim just gave Kon a Look™. “See if you can get a planetary system map.”
“You think that'll help?”
“I think it'll either confirm or deny a theory.”
☆☆☆
“Sunsets are nice and all, but I miss sunrises,” Danny commented as they watched yet another sunset.
Kon perked, “I can help with that. Probably.”
“Huh?”
Kon stepped closer, “If I can hold you I can take you to the sunrise.” Danny was only half there most of the time, Kon hadn't even attempted touching him aside from handing over the tablet.
Danny shrugged and stepped closer, allowing himself to be picked up. It was an odd sensation, like holding mist without the wet feeling but just as cold. A little more solid than mist, Danny still barely weighed anything though, truly not there in body at all.
“Okay, hold on tight.”
Danny did indeed hold on tight as Kon took off, heading directly for the sun. It was almost like watching time go backwards as Kon zoomed to the otherside of the planet, going from sunset to noon to early morning until they passed the sunrise altogether. In the gloom of early morning, when the eastern sky was only just starting to lighten, Kon looked around until he found a good spot.
Clear skies, out in the country, just the two of them and a fence to sit on as they watched the sky turn pink.
Danny ended up basking in the morning light once the sun was fully up. He looked peaceful, eyes closed and face turned heavenward.
Kon may have just made a problem for himself. How does he bring up planets if they aren't stargazing? Or worse, what if Danny starts showing up here instead of the farm?
Fuck it.
“Will you draw your planetary system for me?”
“Huh?”
“I'm just really curious, I think it'd be pretty cool to learn more about an alien planet and-”
Danny laughed, “No, it's okay, I get it. That was just outta left field is all. I wanna know about Rao's planetary system too.”
“Yeah, I think we can arrange that.” Kon pulled out his tablet, opened up the art program again, and told Danny to have at it. He started with a big yellow dot off to one side.
“Oh, a yellow star?”
“Yeah, it looks white from the ground but it's yellow. This won't be to scale, by the way.”
“Of course,” Kon agreed. Cosmic distances could be wild.
Danny went about putting smaller dots in a row away from his star, each one a different color. First was a dark red-brown, then yellow-orange, soft blue, bright red, a bunch of little brown dots, a big yellow-ish dot with a small red dot on the lower right… another big yellow-ish dot with white rings around it…
Kon frowned as a very familiar planetary system took shape. Two more big blue dots, then a final little white dot. That was quite the coincidence. Then Danny switched to a thin green tool and started writing in the same looping script he had before.
That didn’t say “The Sun” did it?
Kon frowned harder as no, despite how loopy and curly the letters were those looked like English letters spelling out the names of the planets in the system they were in right now.
Danny glanced up at Kon and smirked as he wrote “Dirt” under the little blue dot.
“What? But… but that’s where we are now.”
“Yeah, it’s kinda obvious you didn’t really put me on an alien planet. Not sure why you didn’t fix the sky, I gave you that star chart and everything. But it’s kinda fun listening to you make shit up though, so I don’t mind.”
“What? Danny? What are you talking about? Fix the sky?”
“It’s okay, Nocturn, I figured it out when you changed it to a sunrise. I thought this was just an NPC you put here to keep me company, I appreciate you spending so much time with me though.”
“Danny, who’s Nocturn?”
Danny glanced up at Kon with one of his soft smiles. No, not soft, indulgent. “Sure, okay, guess we’re still playing. Nocturn’s the ancient of dreams.” Danny looked back down, finishing giving names to all the planets.
Kon thought it was strange that the asteroid belt was called that but for some reason the Kuiper belt was labeled as just Pluto.
No, focus. What did it mean that Danny was from Earth but the stars were wrong? The stars wouldn’t have changed that much in even 100 years, so he can’t be from the distant past or anything. Hell, Orion was mapped out in antiquity. So Danny had to be from another Earth. An alternate timeline.
Fuuuuuuuck, this is what Tim needed confirmation of, isn’t it? Other planets they could handle, but other universes? They were definitely going to need to get help for this.
Danny handed the tablet over when he was done labeling everything. Kon saved it and sent it off to Tim, then pulled up planetary charts for Krypton, Tamaran, Rann, Thanagar, Ungara, and any other systems he could find. He handed the tablet over to Danny, who immediately began eagerly looking over them.
☆☆☆
“Kon.”
“I know, Tim. I figured it out.”
“I hate to bring in others too, but interdimensional travel isn’t exactly something we can do ourselves.”
Kon sighed, he was really hoping this would be one mission they didn’t have to involve others in. It was supposed to be a way for the Just Us team to get back together, it’d been a while since they could all hang out. “I know, but it doesn’t stop me from being disappointed.”
“Right, I guess the first thing we need is to contact JL about this so we can find a way to hunt down his home dimension.”
“Probably a JLD thing, since he’s astral projecting and all.”
Tim nodded, “Probably.”
DP x DC Prompt/Plotbunny #6
After days? weeks? months? years? in this mercy-forsaken lab, Danny finds himself slipping; his core straining under the weight of what he's been subjected to. In a last ditch effort to save his fracturing soul, his brain simply stops processing the pain and allows his mind to escape into a waking dream.
Danny knows it's a dream. If he thinks about it; he can still hear, see, feel the scientists at work. He doesn't think about it; instead embraces whatever false world his mind decides to concoct for him.
.
Several states away, a young boy opens his eyes to the inside of a strange pod in an abandoned lab. Though he cannot see it yet, a strange metal tag dangles from his ear, stamped on one side with the word 'CADMUS' and on the other with 'R-13'.
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There's a lot going around about the Neil Gaiman allegations, but one thing I keep coming back to is how we think about abusers in general.
@transcyberism wrote this on another post (quoting and not reblogging because I think that would hijack the original post): "Abusers look and act like normal-ass people."
I keep thinking about this because, unfortunately, abusers are normal-ass people. They're not like some alien species, they're people, with lives that, often, look a lot like yours. This doesn't mean that the things they do aren't devastatingly hurtful, or violent, and have outrageously harmful consequences. Of course they do. But the point here is that, most of the time, abusers aren't like an unknowable force for evil. They're people, and they're often motivated by the same things you are.
What I'm trying to get at here is that we are all capable of hurting each other beyond repair. I don't believe there is some innate capacity for evil and damage that abusers have and we don't, I believe the ability to cause damage resides in all of us. This doesn't mean that everybody is an abuser and everybody has caused such damage. I'm not pointing at you, the person reading this, and accusing you of being an abuser. That's not what I'm saying. But I'm saying that we all could be. Not that we have, or we're going to. But we could. Abusers are normal-ass people, and so are we. And normal-ass people hurt each other all the time, intentionally or not.
In Avatar the Last Airbender, when Toph says "it's like these people are born bad," Aang replies "no, that's not it at all. Everyone is capable of great good or great evil." I think he's hit the nail on the head. I don't believe people are born bad, and I don't believe people are born good. We are all capable of unimaginable suffering. Abusers are normal-ass people.
The reason this is important, I think, is when we consider what Lila Shapiro, the author of the Vulture article, writes about Gaiman's history with Scientology. Apparently, he was subjected to horrible things at the hands of the church and his parents when he was a child. As other people have pointed out, this is not meant to absolve him or forgive him, or even explain his actions. We're not in his head, we don't know. It's more to put his actions into context. Neil Gaiman is a normal-ass person who had horrible things done to him by other normal-ass people and did horrible things to other normal-ass people. Abuse victims abuse victims. Again, this is not meant to explain/absolve him, but to put his actions in context.
I also think we have to remember that Neil Gaiman is very likely a normal-ass person as we try and make sense of what to do next. Yes, he should face some kind of punishment; yes, his victims deserve justice; yes, we probably shouldn't make any more of his stuff into hit TV shows, and we should probably think twice about buying his books. But we can't just, like, kill him, or write him off as a one-note evil character who is completely different from us. He's not the Other Mother. He didn't do these horrible things because he's fundamentally different from us, he did these things because he is, unfortunately, a normal-ass person, just like we are.
#Neil Gaiman#neil gaimen allegations#this isn't like a call to action btw#i'm not trying to defend him#i just want to redefine how we think about this#and i'm not saying we have to support him or keep buying his books or like show up for him or whatever#think about him however you want#do whatever you want#but i think it's important to remember that he is a normal-ass person#who like other normal-ass people#is capable of horrible things
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A Dance 'Round The Memory Tree
Read an "mc remembers Sylus" fic (I will link it once I find it), and then this came out. I'll add each guys version to this post later, because those are also in my head.
Tags: Established relationship (think, all the way after nightly rendezvous) Sylus x you, Sylus x reader, genderless mc, reader is mc.
"No!" You yelled, hand reaching out into the darkness of your room as you awoke violently. There's tears on your face and your throat hurts, yet the physical pain is like nothing compared to what you feel.
You can still smell the blood, smell the smoke and feel the hilt of your sword in your hands. His voice is still clear in your head.
You get out of bed like a bat out of hell, uncaring of what time it might be. A plethora of imagines play in your head. The datura flower field, Sylus in chains, him carrying you as you flew in the night sky, the treasures you plundered, your last days together.
You must press on.
Only you and this flower can touch me there.
I like your eyes.
Your footsteps are noisy.
You need to see him– you have to, if it's the last thing you'll do. You barely remember to put on some shoes in your haste to pick up your keys and get out of the room, not caring for changing your pijamas.
You're driven by desperation, taking your bike to the n109 zone, barely paying attention to the speed limits as you make your way over. You're relieved, angry, happy, sad and terrified. A whirlwind of emotions that go too fast for you to keep track of. You feel like you're going crazy.
Your dragon is here, he found you and he stayed even when you weren't the same. He stayed even though you were scared, even though you pushed him away, waiting patiently for you.
Your dragon
You want to laugh, gratefulness and pride swelling in your chest.
You burst into the base like hell broke loose, as if you're leading the army of demons that will wreak havoc. The sight is oddly reminiscent of the sorceress you were once. You find him in his office with the twins, and the whirlwind of emotions comes right back at the sound of his voice.
"What a surprise, kitten."
You want to hit him, angry at him for making you kill him, so you do. You slap his shoulder before pulling him up from his chair, burying your face in his neck as you cling to him, finally breaking down in his arms. You missed him. You missed him so fucking much and now he was finally here, in your arms.
He's quick to signal the twins to leave you alone, concerned looks exchanged before the door clicked shut behind them. His arms surround you and you can't help but shudder at the warmth, clinging to him even harder as you cried.
"Sweetie?"
"Why?" The words come out of you mouth before you can stop them "Why did you leave? Why did you make me kill you? Why?!" You don't know if he understands you, you can barely understand your own words as you babble between sobs and wails.
You let him pull you towards the couch and you make yourself comfortable on his lap, not leaving any room for discussion. You barely register the way he softly shushes you, his hand making soothing motions on your back, or the way he holds you just as hard as you cling to him. You don't know how much time passes before the tears stop, you only know that you feel numb and exhausted. You sniffle your nose, and use the inner side of the neck of your shirt to clean it.
"Have some water, sweetie," you stare blankly at the cup in his hands before meeting Sylus's concerned eyes, and you can't help the tears that cloud your eyesight. His eyes, his beautiful blood red eyes.
"Why did you have to die?" Is all you can muster to say as you raise a hand to his cheek, holding his face like it'll break in your hands if you weren't gentle. "What was the point of all of that if you couldn't be by my side? I just wanted you, only needed my dragon and nothing more." The tears are falling again, and you close your eyes as you cry, this time softer and quieter. The cup is left forgotten as he pulls you back in.
"It was either me or you, beloved, and I couldn't let it be you." Sylus's answer comes after a while in silence, his voice a broken whisper. You can feel the weight he carried in it. That does very little to soothe you. Instead, you wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him so this time it's him who hides, like you're trying to protect him. His arms wrap around your waist in response, the hold possessive and gentle, and he sighs into your neck. You run a hand through his hair, a sad smile on your lips.
You always wanted to do that.
You keep holding each other in silence, and you get to calm down before all of those memories resurface, and everything finally makes sense.
His insistence on resonating with you, the visions and the voices that came with him using his eye on you, the hurt you'd caught on his face when Philip had said that you were disgusted by him.
How everything felt so right even when you felt like you couldn't trust him, the familiarity. You finally understood.
"You tried so hard, didn't you?" you whispered. "At the beginning," you add when he pulls away to look at you, with a huff of laughter even though laughing is the last thing you want to do. "I couldn’t make sense of why you were trying so hard to resonate with me... you just wanted me to remember."
You let him dry your face and after that, you drink some water. You get to cuddle on the couch, with him on top of you, and the storm of emotions settles as you talk for hours, finally getting the answers to your questions. You're playing with his hair in the way he likes, and you find yourself thinking about how if he still were a dragon, his chest would probably rumble above yours. His weight and warmth make you feel sleepy.
"I don't appreciate you starving me for three days, mister." You poke his ribs before yawning and settling deeper into the couch. "You still have to make up for that." You whine softly when he gets up, frowning softly before he picks you up.
"We can discuss that later, sweetie, rest for now." There's a soft smile on his lips, and you can't help but smile back, even if a little lopsided as sleep catches up to you.
"You'll stay with me while I sleep, right?" You ask when he lays you in bed, making space for him under the covers and quickly settling your head on his chest once he joined.
"Of course, sweetheart."
That's the last thing you hear before falling under, with his erratic heartbeat on your ear and his warmth on your body.
Your Sylus.
#love and deep space#love and deepspace#l&ds#lads#sylus#sylus l&ds#l&ds sylus#lnds sylus#sylus love and deepspace#love and deepspace sylus#lads sylus#sylus lads#sylus x reader#sylus x mc
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