#like I feel like America has magic but he either

[yourpillowtalksucks]

Random headcanon but America can talk to animals, not only are they like drawn to him but he can also understand what they’re saying. He talks to them often lol.

[mosswiind]

RANKING THE VEILGUARD COMPANIONS AS SPICY PARTNERS

This is definitively correct and I will not be accepting feedback.

In seventh and last place, we have our sweet boy Lucanis.

He's so into you. Spite is at least the same amount of into you. Lucanis though, is wildly inexperienced. Dude blacked out seeing Rook of any gender without a top on. A single titty would put this man in the hospital.

As a person who has slept with a lot of people, enthusiasm does not always compensate for skill. Lucanis would be very sweet, and apologizing because this has literally never happened to him before.

In sixth, we have Bellara.

Bellara is wonderful! But, similar to Lucanis, she's pretty inexperienced, and not in a position to acquire more experience without Rook’s involvement. She did date Irelin, but Irelin also doesn't give "exciting spicy partner" vibes. I feel like she would be enthusiastic about figuring out what you both like! It would just take some time to get there. She would also be very open to using magical aids. Electrical magic? Hell yeah.

She's also absolutely a bottom and if that's a consideration for you, she would be very good at it.

In fifth, we have Harding.

Harding is one long conversation away from being down for some Actual Freak Shit. She's already down, she just doesn't know what to ask for.

HOWEVER. Harding has precisely zero game, so it may feel a little silly while y'all figure your stuff out.

It will be good, it will also be clumsy and sweet.

In fourth, Taash.

Taash is similar to Harding, but has more sexual experience. They are also a confirmed top. Those are rare! They are coded to feel like they're in their early twenties, and extremely athletic, so stamina would not at any point be an issue. I've seen some comments that their bluntness would be bad for dirty talk/having game - those people didn't have to take a minute to do some deep breathing after the Taamlok scene, and also do not have taste. Taash will break you in half in a good way. Taash is a capital T Top and honestly, I respect it.

In third, Davrin.

Davrin, in a different group, would be the top pick. He's cocky, confident, has game for days. He's not a snack, he's a meal, and he is very aware of that. In my experience, banging Extremely Hot Dudes can go one of two ways; it's either sex you will wake up thinking about ten years later, or it will be like, extremely mid. I have faith in his ability. He is also a top, but I feel like he would also be into another top so there's a Fight (America's Next Top Model theme plays).

Thrill of the chase, indeed.

In second, Emmrich.

I know Emmrich is a canonical sex god. I know a bunch of y'all are extremely horny for Dr. Hose Goat. He caught me on the back foot a couple of times.

I also understand that this is a community that is very into Hot Authority Figures Who Remind You To Drink Water. There's a top shortage. I know what you people are like. I get it.

In first, it's the internet's wife, Neve Gallus.

Neve reads people for a living. She's also hot, emotionally unavailable, and would rather make out than acknowledge she has Actual Human Feelings. She's so locked into everything going on around her that she knows what you want before you do.

She's also creative at problem solving - no good surface? No problem. Just...not her desk, probably. There's a lot of notes to get displaced, and she has a hard enough time with the wisps. She will not allow your dumb ass to be too horny for organization.

Also - frost magic for you sensory seekers, and the ability to slow down time. I feel like we're all on the same page about the possibilities.

Your brain will melt out of your ears. You will not be able to stand. For days, potentially.

She's also a switch, depending on the vibes presented.

Emotionally unavailable romantics will ruin your life.

[yuurei20]

Twisted Wonderland the Novel English Translation Review: Excellent

Did a quick read-through of the English-language novel (not a word-for-word comparison with the original novel yet), and: it is an excellent translation!

Some quick notes about the more language-sensitive parts:

・As in the English-language game, Grim is referred to as a weasel in the prologue. In the original game, the original manga and the EN manga, he is called a Tanuki.

・Much like the EN manga, the original game/manga’s use of the word “egg” has been changed to “fledgling.”

・The incantation for Riddle’s unique magic is: EN Novel: "Are you ready for your sentence? Sentence first! Verdict afterward."

EN Manga: “Are you ready for your sentence? The verdict comes afterwards. Any last words?”

・The conversation where Yuuya explains where he is from is very similar to the original novel:

"I'm from Nihon," Yuya told him. "Ni-kan?" "Umm. Ja-p-an." Yuya tried the English name of his country, but that apparently did not click for Crowley either.

・The references to Japanese schools beginning in spring and NRC being more closely related to schools in Europe and America have been retained.

・Curse words have been changed into things like “punk,” “dunce,” etc., with Ace repeating “dodo” fairly often.

・The line where Ace tells Yuuya to drop the honorific from his name was changed. Instead, Yuuya thanks Ace by saying “I really appreciated your help yesterday” and Ace responds, “This isn't some highfalutin rich-kid school. You don't need to be so polite."

・The line where Deuce tells Yuuya to drop the honorific from his name was changed to Deuce protesting against Yuuya thanking Ace first instead of thanking him first.

"How come you said Ace first?" Deuce protested. "I'm first."

・Cater consistently refers to Ace, Deuce, Yuuya and Grim as “Acey, Deucey, Yuey and Grimmy. At least once he refers to Riddle as “Riddley.” No nickname for Trey.

・As there are no honorifics Yuuya refers to Riddle by his first name only, Ace refers to Trey by his first name only, and Deuce refers to Cater, Trey, Riddle and Malleus as “Diamond,” “Clover,” “Rosehearts” and “Draconia.”

・The incantation for Trey’s unique magic is: "White to red, red to white.”

・In the original novel Ace says “Thank you,” in English, while in the English translation he says “merci.”

・”Beastpeople” are called “beast people” instead of “beast men.”

・Yuuya reflecting on how Chenya does not use an honorific with Riddle was changed to, “Yuya had only ever heard Trey talk about him so casually.”

・The line about Cater using honorifics with everyone except Trey in serious situations was changed to, “He usually sounded so lighthearted when he called Trey's name…And Cater only said his name so seriously when it was truly important.”

・The EN game switched from “magical healers” to “medical mages,” and the novel went with ”magical healers.”

・Ace refers to Riddle without an honorific just once in the original novel. This is commented on in a line changed to, “You’re already bossing him around.”

・(There is a typo where Cater and Trey are talking about Riddle’s upcoming duel, and a line that Trey says is attributed to Deuce. Deuce is not in the scene.)

・(There is also a typo where Enchanted Mine (changed from ”Dwarf Mine”) is written as “Enchanted Mind.”)

・Ace’s original line of “the way a kid turns out doesn't determine the value of their parents” was written backwards in the EN game, but the EN manga and novel are both accurate to the original game/manga/novel.

・Cater’s line in the original game/manga/novel admonishing Trey for hiding his true feelings has been upheld in the novel as well as the EN manga, with only the EN game rewritten to Cater admonishing himself, instead. (This was possibly subject pronoun confusion.)

・Much like the EN game, Leona’s “Be prepared” was rewritten in the EN novel.

[aziraphales-library]

Hello, do you perhaps know of any fics set on the Titanic?

There are quite a number of Titanic fics, including several human AUs, but I've focused on through the ages fics here...

RMS Titanic by Bloodrose84 (T)

Aziraphale really felt like he was part of a major piece of history – he loved it when that happened. All history was wonderful, of course, but he did enjoy being able to say to himself "I was there," when people were still talking about a thing decades or centuries after it had happened. ******** Aziraphale and Crowley take a trip on the ill-fated maiden voyage of the Unsinkable Ship. Needless to say, it doesn't go as either one had planned.

Nearer to Thee by canolacrush (T)

On April 11, 1912, the RMS Carpathia sets sail from New York City, bound for Gibraltar and other Mediterranean ports. On board are 743 passengers, about 240 crew members, and one stowaway demon. On the night of April 14, 1912, the RMS Titanic, carrying approximately 1,317 passengers, 885 crew members, and one trouble magnet of an angel, hits an iceberg in the North Atlantic Ocean. Cue history’s most daring, famous, and perilous nautical rescue in maritime history.

The Titanic: Feelings and Folly by Ecchima (T)

The date is April 10th 1912. The Titanic is leaving Southampton with a hedonistic angel on board and is headed to Cherbourg where a demon - who is definitely not nice - is waiting to embark as well. What could go wrong? This is the story of the only voyage of the RMS Titanic. Of the people on board, of the needlessly luxurious amenities and the beautiful silliness that happened before it all went down.

Ocean of Secrets (illustrated) by magicbubblepipe (E)

When Crowley uncovers a plot to sink a so-called unsinkable ship, he decides to take credit for it and collect a commendation from the safety of his London flat. That is, until he spots a certain flaxen haired angel with a weakness for expensive creature comforts boarding the ship. He's forced to take action, lest his beloved be horribly discorporated. TL;DR Crowley and Aziraphale were on the Titanic.

Apsides by Theluminousfisheffect (T)

Aziraphale knows what fate awaits all those onboard the Titanic before it even leaves the port. Crowley has no idea and Aziraphale would very much like to keep it that way.

Sinking Into the Sea by pocketknifeknight (T)

In 1912, Aziraphale's worries include his bookshop, his printing friend's sick wife, and how he's going to make his way to the first class dining room on the Titanic for an unforgettable meal. When his friend, a book printer, asks Aziraphale to go collect master plates from a publisher in America, he also offers Aziraphale his ticket aboard the Titanic. Aziraphale can't resist. The Head Office has nothing to say, so Aziraphale decides he's earned himself a vacation. Unfortunately, a demon, not the one he wants to see, is aboard causing trouble on orders from Hell. Possibly, a demon, the one he is desperate (but unwilling to admit he wants) to see, is also aboard, trying to find a way to save Aziraphale without anyone being the wiser.

What A Dangerous Night (to fall in love) by ahyperactivehero (T)

Both Crowley and Aziraphale are assigned a mission on board the luxury cruise ship, RMS Titanic. It goes about as well as expected. XXX "What're you gonna do?" a man from the group shouted. "Shoot us?!" The group seemed to intensify after that. There was something in the air now and it was a hell of a lot more dangerous than anything Crowley could have ever hoped to create. It was a group of scared humans. He stepped forward, moving so that he was completely in front of Aziraphale and put his hands on the bars. It would take a second, just a quick second to magic- Fire seemed to shoot through his side. Screams rang out around him as he let go of the bars and fell backwards.

Icebergs and Angels (Spicer Relationship Version) by The_Bentley (M)

It's 1912 and Aziraphale, not wanting to be lonely during his mission aboard Titanic, invites Crowley along for a cruise. But he boards the ship before knowing exactly what his mission is. When he learns Heaven wants to teach humanity a lesson for the claim even God couldn't sink it, it could damage his relationship with Crowley, who has his own views on Heaven's need to punish innocents. Can he repair things with Crowley and can they work together to save as many lives as possible? Please note: There are two versions of this, one rated Mature (for sexy times) and one rated Teen (friendship/ace-aro relationship, depending on how you choose to interpret it). The only difference is the level of relationship that adds some extra material in the M version. Otherwise, they're identical. This is the relationship version. My friend, whom I wrote this for, doesn't ship these two, but I do, which is why there are two versions. If you're looking for the one that could be either a friendship or ace-aro relationship, go here

A Diamond Sky Above Titanic by SeaBlueEyes (E)

The year is 1912, and one angel and one demon's lives are about to change forever as they embark on the fateful maiden voyage of the R.M.S. Titanic - and a relationship utterly forbidden by both Heaven and Hell. Rating and warnings for Chapter 13, the rest being far more mild. Some slight amendments to the 2011 FanFiction version, nothing major. Once again, I apologise to the fandom for reading a comedy and writing a tragedy.

- Mod D

[wandamaximoffsbadgirl]

Let's Talk About That

Usually I keep it casual (2)

Psychiatrist!Avenger!fem!reader x Wanda Maximoff

Summary: The compound has been built, and training has begun. With the two of you living together now stolen moments are bound to happen.

Word count: 2.7K

Warnings: legal age gap r is 19 and w is 25, talks of depression, bit of angst, bit of fluff, talk of vo*it (once towards the end)

A/N: The moment between R and W is taken from the moment in WandaVision where they go through Wanda's memories so R is taking the place of Vision and says his lines in that moment.

June 21st 2015

The new Compound was finally built and all of the Avengers moved there to live and to train. You got a new office looking similar to your old one and before you could start moving your things in it was time to start training the new recruits.

Captain America and Black Widow prepare to train the new roster of Avengers, consisting of Falcon, Wanda, War Machine, and Vision.

You stand just off to the side of Cap and Tasha. "You ready to finally show off your powers?" Cap asks you as you smirk, cracking your neck to either side. 

"Oh Cap, you know I was born ready.” you tell him as your eyes glow purple. 

"Alright, line up!" You call out. The new recruits line up. "I have a simple task for you four, move me from this spot." You tell them and you hear Sam chuckle. 

"You deal with our emotions, how hard could it be to move you?" He asks. 

"Thank you for volunteering to be my first victim Sam!" You smile. "Please front and center. The other watch as Sam tries to move you in any way, but can't. Even using his wings he can't. Then Rhodey tries and still nothing, Vision attempts and you don't budge. You look at Wanda. "Well?" You ask, quirking an eyebrow up at her. She has this soft look in her eyes almost like a baby deer.

"I don't want to hurt you." Wanda says her being the only magic user besides you currently on the team. 

"Oh sweetie. You could never hurt me. Go on, hit me with your best shot." You tell her, her eyes and hands glow red as she unleashes attacks on you as you swipe your hand up, a purple force field looking much like Wanda's own magic comes to protect you. They all look at you in shock. 

"Oh did we forget to mention something?" You hear Natasha's condescending tone ring out behind you making you chuckle, catching the attention of the newest members. 

"I think we did Tasha." You say pulling the collar of your shirt down, showing off the glowing purple stone in your chest, looking similar to the mind stone in Vision's head. "I have the power stone in my chest. Really I'm the best of both worlds. Brains and brawns. The stone gives me psychic energy manipulation, force field generation, disintegration of objects I touch, energy absorption, magic empowerment, and of course superhuman strength and durability.

The new Avengers stood in awe as you revealed the Power Stone embedded in your chest, their expressions a mix of shock and admiration. You could feel the weight of their gaze on you, but you stood tall, unyielding, a smirk playing on your lips.

"Wow," Sam exclaimed, breaking the silence. "That's... impressive."

You chuckled, feeling a surge of pride at their reaction. "Thank you, Sam. But let's not get too distracted. We have work to do."

With that, you motioned for them to regroup, eager to put their newfound knowledge to the test. "Alright, let's try this again," you announced, positioning yourself in the center of the training area. "This time, I want you to work together to try and move me."

The recruits exchanged glances before nodding in determination. Sam and Rhodey took to the skies, while Vision and Wanda focused their powers, creating a coordinated assault.

As they unleashed their combined efforts, you could feel the energy swirling around you, pushing against the force field generated by the Power Stone. But despite their best efforts, you remained rooted to the spot, a testament to the strength of the stone's power.

"Keep going!" You encouraged them, a grin spreading across your face as you felt the thrill of the challenge. "You're doing great!"

For several minutes, they continued their assault, each attack more powerful than the last. But no matter how hard they tried, they couldn't overcome the barrier protecting you.

Finally, with a triumphant shout, they ceased their assault, panting and exhausted but exhilarated by the challenge. "I... I can't believe it," Sam gasped, shaking his head in disbelief.

"Believe it," you replied, your voice tinged with pride. "With teamwork and determination, there's nothing we can't overcome. You guys are new to being a team. I'm sure you'll be able to take me on properly soon."

As the others caught their breath, you couldn't help but feel a surge of excitement for the future. With this new team of Avengers and the power of the Stone at your disposal, there was no telling what this new team could accomplish together. And as you looked around at your teammates, you knew that no matter what challenges lay ahead, you would face them head-on, united as one.

===========================================================

The Next Day June 22nd 2015

It's late evening after you had roused yourself to get a snack you notice Wanda's door cracked slightly as you forgo getting a snack and decide to knock on her door. "Open." She says similar to you when the two of you first met. You open the door fully and smile at her, but she doesn't have a smile to give you back. 

She has Malcom in the Middle playing as she is sat on her bed, a grey tank top, mostly covered by a black sweater hanging off her shoulder and tight black leggings. She's sitting with her legs crossed, a pillow in her lap that's she's leaning on. "If now isn't a good time I can..." you trail off. She pats the bed next to her, still no smile, but you can read her well enough that she wants company, she just doesn't always know how to ask for it. 

She looks away, pulling her sleeves over her hands and even though they're covered she still keeps tugging at them with anxiety. You sit next to her mimicking her posture as you grab one of her pillows from behind us and crossing your legs. She finally attempts a smile at you for half a second once you've settled. Then turns her attention back to the TV where Hal gets hurt and you chuckle. 

"I only watched Malcom in the Middle when it was on TV, but I tended to find Full House, Fresh Prince, and The Nanny playing when I'd go looking for late night TV." You tell her. 

"You like sitcoms?" She asks and you look at her with a warm smile. 

"Yeah I do. Never got the chance to tell you though." A smile creeps onto her lips without her knowledge. You unconsciously lick your lips as you stare at hers. She always somehow managed to look perfect and maybe it's the repressed emo girl that you used to be, but her in all black, and her black nail polish she just so happened to be your type. 

"Y/N?" You're pulled back to reality by her voice.

"Hmm?" You ask. 

"I asked what's your favorite sitcom?" She repeats and you think a moment, you end up letting yourself fall back against her bed, staring at her ceiling.

"That's honestly hard for me to answer. I'm not good with picking favorites." You look over at her. "I always feel bad when I pick a favorite anything as if the others aren't good enough or something." You confess to Wanda. 

"What about like top 3 or top 5?"

"Hmmm…” You think for a few moments, going through the list of sitcoms you've grown up with, contemplating about each for no more than a moment. “Full House, That 70s Show, Seinfeld, Friends, Golden Girls, and The Office is probably my newest obsession." She smiles before letting a laugh pass her lips. You smile, biting your bottom lip as you do so because she's just so, "Beautiful." I end up saying out loud. She stops and you can see her face redden. You scramble up off her bed. "Shit sorry if that made you uncomfortable. I'm sorry I'll leave!" You ramble and as you turn to run you feel her grip on your wrist. You look back at her, eyes glowing. 

"If we're being honest with each other Doctor I'd like to let you know I think you're quiet beautiful yourself." She admits to you and something about her calling you doctor sends your brain into a frenzy and you can tell she's hearing every thought going through your head and you can't find yourself to even be mad about it right now as you step back to her, grabbing her face and kissing her.

The moment your lips met, it was as if time stood still. All the worries, the doubts, the fears melted away, leaving only the warmth of her touch and the sweet taste of her lips against yours. In that fleeting moment, there was nothing else in the world but the two of you, lost in the intensity of the connection we shared.

As the kiss deepened, you felt a surge of emotions coursing through you, a mixture of desire, longing, and something deeper, something you couldn't quite put into words. It was as if your souls were reaching out to each other, seeking solace and understanding in the midst of chaos.

When you finally pulled away, breathless and flushed, you found yourself gazing into Wanda's eyes, searching for any sign of regret or hesitation. But all you saw was warmth and affection, mirrored in her gaze.

"I'm sorry," you murmured, your voice barely above a whisper. "I shouldn't have—"

But before you could finish your sentence, Wanda silenced you with a gentle touch of her finger against your lips. "Don't apologize," she said softly, her eyes sparkling with emotion. "That was... unexpected, but not unwelcome."

You felt a rush of relief flood through you at her words, a weight lifted from your shoulders. For the first time in a long time, you allowed yourself to believe that maybe, just maybe, there was hope for something more between the two of you.

As we sat there in silence, the glow of the TV casting flickering shadows across the room, you realized that this was just the beginning of your journey together. There would be challenges ahead, obstacles to overcome, but as long as you faced them together, you knew the two of you could conquer anything.

With a smile, you reached out and took Wanda's hand in yours, intertwining your fingers as if to seal the unspoken promise between the two of you. As the two of you sat there, bathed in the soft light of the TV, you knew that no matter what the future held, you would face it together, side by side, as partners, as friends, and perhaps, if we were lucky, as something more.

Wanda pulls you onto her lap after moving the pillow away. She pulls you into a tight hug and whispers, "I've been so tired recently. It's just...it's like this wave washing over me again and again. It knocks me down and when I try to stand up it just comes for me again and I can't-" you hear her voice cracking, her emotion shifting along with her aura as you rub her back. "It's just going to drown me." She confesses.

"No...no it's not..." you tell her.

"Yeah..." She lets out a dry chuckle and you pull back, letting your hands find her cheeks again. You stare into those deep green eyes full of sorrow and hope there comes a point where you can see them full of joy. You’ve only gotten small glimpses of happiness from Wanda and all you wanted was for those glimpses to last longer until there was no sorrow left. 

"No it won't, I won't let it. Not now. Not ever. Do you hear me Wanda?" You're searching her tear filled eyes to see if on any level she believes you because you could only hope that your words offered some solace to her feelings. All you wanted to do was take some of it away, even just a little so she wasn’t drowning anymore.

"How do you know?" Her voice is cracking and soft, it breaks you to hear her like this.

"Well it can't all be sorrow, can it?" She's searching your Y/E/C eyes now, your thoughts even. "Tell me. What is grief if not love persevering?" You ask, a small tilt to your head. Her dam finally breaks as she cries and you shush her, helping her through it. "I've got you Wanda. Always. I'll hold you above the waves. I'd let myself drown before I let it take you." You tell her softly. “I can help take some of it away, would you like that?” You ask her, her tear filled eyes looking up at you and nods ever so slightly, but still asks,

“Will it hurt?” Her voice cracks as you rub her cheeks with your thumbs, wiping the tears away.

“No darling it won’t it’ll make you feel lighter. I don’t do it often. Bad emotions are disgusting. I have to take them out of you and eat them which I’m sure sounds weird and I guess in a way it is, but for you I’ll do it.” She nods once again, clinging to you as you move your hand to her back, rubbing a gentle circle. You can feel the physical manifestation of the emotions pulling them apart from one another, only taking out the pain and grief, not all just enough. 

A black oobleck is pulled out threatening to slip through your fingers as Wanda pulls back to look. You use both your hands to keep it contained as you bring it to your mouth. You open your mouth as wide as you can, tongue sticking out as you let the gooey orb fall into your mouth and swallow. Your face contorts and a shiver goes through your body like when you take medicine you can’t stand. It tastes like vomit in the worst way possible and the main reason you tended not to do this. 

You feel Wanda cup your cheeks and murmur, “You’re okay.” and “Thank you.” As much as you hated it, you knew you’d do it as much as she needed. You lean in, placing your forehead against her own, nuzzling your faces together as you feel your cheeks dampen from her tears. 

“No more tears darling.” You whisper, feeling her smile against you. 

The two of you eventually make it up her bed, laying against her pillows, small soft kisses are peppered in between things. There are no more tears from Wanda through the night as the show continues playing as she falls asleep on your chest. 

As Wanda rested against you, her breathing steady and her grip on you relaxed, you couldn't help but feel a sense of peace wash over you. Despite the turmoil and uncertainty that surrounded you two, in this moment, all that mattered was the warmth of her body pressed against yours, the rhythm of her breaths lulling you into a state of calm.

You gently brushed a strand of hair away from her face, marveling at the serenity that seemed to radiate from her even in sleep. She had been through so much, faced unimaginable challenges and losses, yet here she was, still fighting, still clinging to hope.

And in that moment, you made a silent vow to yourself, to always be there for her, to be her anchor in the storm, to hold her above the waves no matter how fierce they may rage. Because Wanda was more than just a teammate or a friend—she was someone you cared deeply for, someone you would do anything to protect.

As the soft glow of the TV bathed the room in a gentle light, you closed your eyes and allowed yourself to drift off to sleep, knowing that no matter what tomorrow may bring, the two of you would face it together, united in our strength and our love. And as you held Wanda in your arms, you knew that as long as the two of you had each other, you could weather any storm that came your way.

[lurkingshan]

Thoughts on the Blue Canvas Ending

I didn't like it, y'all. I am disappointed that this show undercut its own stakes and themes right at the end for the sake of a tacked on happy ending that did not flow from anything that happened before. That happy epilogue is not remotely believable, so it left me feeling empty.

But let's go back a step. My first complaint began before that, when they decided to go with a double noble idiocy ending to the main story. Now, Qi Lu has been planning to leave without telling Qin Xiao for awhile, and I thought that actually made sense because the story was so clear on the different stakes for each of them. For Qin Xiao, passing this exam was the key to his future, and Qi Lu was going to be fine either way. It was right for Qi Lu to leave and make sure his dad didn't destroy Qin Xiao's life. A rare case of this kind of decision for your loved one's own good that didn't actually feel wrong.

But this is not the case for Qin Xiao's choices in this final episode. Putting himself at risk to protect Qi Lu was stupid, but believable. I understood why he couldn't simply stay put and wait to hear that Teachier Liu rescued Qi Lu, and we've all been waiting for the gang to finally hurt him in a way that messed up his plans. But his decision to leave town and lie about it and go off wandering the streets with no resources in order to protect Qi Lu's future really pissed me off. This show has said over and over again that their lives have different stakes and Qin Xiao needs to look out for himself, only to throw that out the window to follow this dumb trope. And I don't like that Teacher Liu knew the truth--Qi Lu is not going abroad by choice with his mom, he's being forced to go by his father--and didn't speak up once it was clear what Qin Xiao was thinking. It felt wrong and it undercut the story's themes so carelessly.

All that said, it didn't matter anyway, because the show glossed over the consequences of all of that with a six year time skip and post credits exposition dump about how Qin Xiao got into college anyway, contra every single thing this show spent 10 episodes telling us. This renders the stakes of the entire story meaningless, as apparently this exam that we spent weeks preparing for didn't actually matter, and was not in fact a matter of life or death importance for Qin Xiao. Sure, he ended the main story with no money, no family, and no hope, but don't worry because the magical time skip fairy fixed it!

On top of that, this idealistic future that we suddenly find ourselves in doesn't bother to account for Qi Lu's dad. I have no idea why Qi Lu would suddenly be granted the freedom to study film in America and then come back to this town to make films and hang out with his boyfriend. Is his dad dead in a ditch somewhere, because how else would this be possible?? When we saw this sequence earlier in the show, the entire point was that it was a fantasy of an ideal life they knew they couldn't have under their circumstances. To then tack that footage on to the end of the show and try to sell it as the real ending is just insulting.

With Chinese productions you always have to assume some level of interference and story weirdness as a result of managing the censors. My best guess is they they had to go with the separation ending and decided to tack on this epilogue as a way to give the show's fans some measure of happiness. But there were better ways to get to the separation that would have felt more thematically coherent, and the epilogue undercut the story so badly that I wish they hadn't done it.

[writing-intheundercroft]

Bite The Hand

AO3 Link

Pairing: Auror!Sebastian x F!MC

Word Count: 7,717

Rating: E (Smut, MDNI - M!Masturbation, M!Receiving Oral Sex)

Summary: Sebastian Sallow bites the hand that feeds him. Or, the years spent between your break up and the events of The Night Shift.

A/N: Auror!Seb took a vacation in my mind, and I never meant to let him relax this long. So, here's an excruciating prologue I've been writing over the past few months for him. If you have not yet, I highly recommend reading The Night Shift before this, which was one of my first one shots!

Sebastian sits on the old stone fence lining the exterior of Feldcroft; he swirls the beer bottle in his hand before lifting it to his lips, taking a thick swig.  His eyes are red, and he’s far too drunk, but it doesn’t matter–the pictures have been taken, and no one at the party is missing him too much.  Perhaps Anne, but she’s far too busy entertaining everyone in her white dress to separate herself from her new husband’s arm.  Ominis looks positively dashing, proudly swaying with Anne in his arms.  Sebastian has known since they were twelve they’d probably end up married someday, and he’s happy to see them together.  

After delivering a proud speech to honor his sister and twirling her on the dance floor, he indulges a bit too much in the bar Garreth Weasley has put together for the event, downing bottle after bottle of the ginger’s experimental enhanced ale. Choosing to peruse the gift table over dancing in the hamlet square, Sebastian begins appraising the parcels.  He’s shaking each box, trying to guess what gifts might be inside, when his eyes land on a neatly wrapped box.  There’s a lovely velvet bow affixed to the top, and the note seems to call his name.  He tears the tag away, eyes roving over the familiar handwriting. Gripping the beer bottle in his free hand, he stumbles through the field to find some privacy. 

Sebastian holds the gift tag, the rough pad of his finger swiping over the swirly cursive. It’s stupid, he thinks, to have thought you would have come.  Anne had warned him that she was sending you an invitation despite the distance you’d put between yourself and the friend group.  Sebastian had felt sick over it for weeks–either you’d arrive at Anne and Ominis’s wedding alone and he’d have to own up to his mistakes, or worse, you’d arrive, happy with a man on your arm.  

Happy and content, the two things Sebastian is pretending to be.

Sebastian loosens his white cravat, letting it fall into the mud below him.  He is happy, he thinks.  Sebastian Sallow knows he’s an absolute fucking catch. The department of magical law enforcement’s most eligible bachelor, people have said. He has several badges, praising his heroics as an auror.  He hasn’t unintentionally left the bar alone in months, something he’s bragged about with the lads.  Girlfriends are nothing but trouble, and he’s quite vocal about how glad he is that he wasn’t trapped into marriage at a young age.  That comment usually garnered him some laughs at the bar–it was less successful at a wedding, let alone the wedding of his best friend and twin sister, who were getting married at the youthful age of twenty one. 

Sebastian pulls the tag up to his eyes, squinting at it once more.  He’s searching it for any underlying clues, a note he’s missed. 

So sorry I couldn’t be there. Sending my love.

He scowls.  Sorry my arse, he repeats in his head. That's surely a lie–you’d never been sorry a day in your relationship, let alone at the end of it.  He probably shouldn’t be as bitter about your breakup after three years, but happy events like this only reinforce the overwhelming emptiness he feels when it comes to relationships.

Perhaps one should never date their best friend, he thinks.  The love lost from your break up has tainted most of his happy memories, and his stomach only ever churns when he thinks of you.

He has no idea if you’re even still in London, or if you decided to try out a stint in America or Spain, like you always dreamt of doing when you were teenagers. Sometimes he thinks he sees you on the streets of Diagon Alley.  A wisp of your hair, someone with the same nose.  He hears your laugh sometimes in the pub, but it’s not you. It’s never really you, but the thought, the hope, it stokes a fire. A fire that tells him he would fall to his knees if he ever saw you again, kiss your feet, apologize for having yelled, for thinking that a man would ever walk away from the person he loved because he felt threatened. It was the only time he’d ever lost faith in your relationship, wavering when a pretty girl batted her eyelashes at him in the bar.  After your fight, he’d gone to Ominis’s apartment for the evening to get some space, but found your shared flat empty in the morning.

He never lets the fire grow too big.  He’s spent the last three years dampening it with cheap booze, recklessness at work, and girls that never last more than a few weeks at a time.

With glassy eyes, Sebastian looks out to the empty fields. It wasn’t like he was actually planning on proposing–the two of you were just eighteen, after all.  But sitting in the front row, watching his best friend swear unyielding love to his twin sister, Sebastian found himself overcome with emotion.  Sure, you’d been too young then, but he’d always pictured you standing next to the vicar, wearing a pretty white dress.

He tries to think of that memory, but your face is coming up blank.  Perhaps he’s too drunk, or perhaps it’s been too long.

“Fuck!” Sebastian roars, throwing the beer bottle.  

He can hear it crash in the distance as his head falls into his hands. 

Sebastian hops off the fence, wobbling on his feet.  The music gets softer and softer as he puts distance between himself and the party; he’s in no mood, and he’s bound to ruin the wedding if he stays any longer.  Without another thought, he pulls his wand out of his pocket, apparating back home.

Sebastian doesn’t hear from Ominis or Anne for a few weeks; he assumes the happy couple are enjoying their honeymoon in Lisbon.  Ominis’s pretty little owl arrives at his window one day, a scrap of parchment requesting his presence at their home.

Sebastian excitedly replies, promising to be over on his next day off.  He wonders if they’ve gotten their wedding portraits back yet, or if they got any duplicate wedding gifts that might suit his bachelor pad.  He’s been needing a new frying pan, might as well steal their old one.

Sebastian cheerfully takes a handful of floo powder, clearly enunciating Anne and Ominis’s address as he drops the dust in the fireplace.  Green flames burst around him, and he opens his eyes to see Ominis’s mahogany paneled study.  The blonde is sitting at his desk, arms crossed over his chest.

“Sebastian,” Ominis has a cold look on his face.

“Morning, Om.” Sebastian grins. “Hell of a party. Wedding of the year, I’d wager.” He walks out of the fireplace, brushing soot off of his waistcoat. “How was the honeymoon?”

“It was lovely,” Ominis says nonchalantly. “Anne quite enjoyed the sun.”  he walks over to his best friend, carefully rolling up his sleeves.  Sebastian furrows his eyebrows as Ominis stows his wand in his pocket, moving his wedding ring from his left to his right.

Without another thought, Ominis pulls back, sucker punching him.

“What the fuck,” Sebastian spits, eyes watering as he rubs his jaw.

Ominis smoothly puts his wedding ring back on, crossing his arms. “That’s for ruining our wedding, you selfish dimwit.  Anne was beside herself for days because of you.”

Sebastian hears the door open; Anne, looking quite sunkissed and freckled, slips into the room. 

“Your husband just punched me!” Sebastian complains.

His twin sister shrugs, sitting on top of Ominis’s desk. “You deserved it.” she scoffs. “You invited not one, but two women to be your guest at our wedding, and then fucked off into a field to get drunk and left without saying goodbye.  Nearly thought the two would rip each other’s hair out on the dance floor when they realized your mistake.”

“I did not,” Sebastian retorts, crossing his arms.

“Anastasia and Alexandra,” Ominis sighs. “I think you owe both of them an apology, if they ever speak to you again.”

Sebastian’s face heats up as he puts the pieces together.  Well, now it made sense why Alexandra, the waitress at the Leaky Cauldron, had spilled his beer onto him and stalked off.  Even more so that Anastasia, one of the timekeepers for the auror office, had burst into tears when she saw him at work. She’d put in her two weeks notice, spitting on his shoes as she passed by with a box of her personal effects in hand.

“I think we’re going to laugh about this eventually,” Sebastian suggests. 

Ominis’s face twists with displeasure. “They tore Anne’s veil.”

“Okay, it’ll take a few years.” Sebastian sputters in response, nervously eyeing his twin sister.

Anne stands up, her hands balled up into fists at her side. “It wasn’t just my veil, Sebastian.” she seethes. “It was Mum’s veil–”

Sebastian’s eyes widen. “No,” he squeaks, utterly horrified.

Anne’s eyes were watering. “Mum’s veil,” she croaks. “Dug it out of storage, had it restored just for the wedding, and those women you invited destroyed it, fighting over you.  Meanwhile, you were out getting sloshed Merlin knows where, abandoning my wedding.”

Sebastian stares shamefully at his shoes while Anne paces back and forth, her heels clicking on the hardwood floor.  His shoulders bowled over, the brunette looks up at the couple.  He hates the way they pity him, but he hates it even more when they’re mad at him.  Not roll-their-eyes mad, but truly, deeply upset.

“You need to get yourself together, Sebastian.” Ominis barks. “I’ve absolutely had it with you and this obscene behavior.  The drinking, the whoring –”

“Alright, I wouldn’t call it whoring.” Sebastian furrows his eyebrows. “That’s a bit of a stretch–”

“New women, every week.” Ominis sounds even angrier than before. “All because you’re a bloody coward, running away from your feelings.  Gods, I used to wonder why she left, and now it all makes sense–"

Sebastian doesn’t even realize that he’s holding Ominis by the tie, pushing him against the dark wooden walls.  Anne is screeching at him, hitting him at the shoulders, while Ominis raises a perfectly arched eyebrow.

“Struck a nerve, have I?” he asks coolly.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Sebastian growls. “Don’t even go there.  Don’t say her name.”

“Everyone can see it, Sebastian.” Ominis shrugs. “It’s pathetic, that’s what it is.  Either make your peace with how you left things off with her and move on, or speak to her like a real man.”

Sebastian lets go, hands fumbling for his wand.  As soon as his fingers wrap around the cool, checkered marble handle, it flies out of his hand, clattering across the room.

“That’s enough from the two of you,” Anne snaps, shoving her wand back into her pocket. “You’re acting like children.”

“He started it,” Sebastian snarls.  He looks over at his best friend–Merlin, Ominis is his best friend, and he doesn’t even recognize him.  The blonde man has never been this angry at him before, not even when he killed–

Right, Sebastian swallows thickly. Best not to think about the past like that.

“Grow up, Sebastian.” Ominis digs his finger into Sebastian’s chest; he’s so angry, his jaw is quaking. “I don’t want to see you, speak to you, hear from you until you’ve grown the fuck up.” he threatens.  Ominis backs off, tugging his waistcoat down. “Anne, I’m going to take a walk around the block to cool down.”

Ominis grips his wand tightly, stalking out of the study.  The door slams heavily behind him, leaving the Sallow twins alone together. 

“Now look at what you’ve done,” Anne sighs, crossing her arms as she sits against the window.

“I’m sorry, Annie.” Sebastian chews on his lower lip. “I didn’t mean to–”

“No,” Anne scowls. “You never mean to.  You’ve somehow skated through twenty one years of life with nothing ever being your fault.”

“That’s not true,” Sebastian interjects.

“There are consequences to your actions, Sebastian.” Anne huffs. “You need to know that.”

“I do,” Sebastian pleads with her. “And I’m sorry–I’m sorry I left your wedding, I’m sorry I invited the two of them, I really didn’t even remember–”

“You’re not you , Sebastian.” Anne strains. “You haven’t been you in what feels like a very long time.”

“Not you too,” Sebastian groans. “Anne, you can’t possibly think this has to do with her.”

Anne’s eyes are teary now. “Ominis is right. You’re a shell, Sebastian. You’re going through the motions you think you should, but it’s not you. The real you wouldn’t forget about two women and just callously throw them aside. You wouldn’t leave my wedding without saying goodbye.”

Sebastian avoids eye contact with his sister, eyes glued to the floor boards. “I’m sorry,” he says sheepishly. “I was just too drunk.”

“You never used to drink this much,” Anne scolds. “Spending nearly every night down at the pub, all the whispers about you flirting with all sorts of women.  You’re a different person.”

“I’ve grown up, Anne.” Sebastian suggests. “A man can’t sow his oats without getting criticized now?”

“You were about to get married–”

Sebastian shuts his eyes, waving her off. “That’s silly , Anne.  I wasn’t serious about it.  We were eighteen, we’d just graduated Hogwarts.  It would’ve been stupid to get married.”

“But you wanted to,” Anne retorts. “You talked about it all the time.”

“Can we stop talking about stupid ideas I had when I was eighteen?” Sebastian growls. His cheeks are aflame, freckles burning at the continued mention of you.  Days ago, you were merely a memory, a chapter Sebastian had turned past in life.  After seeing your handwriting scrawled on a little card, thinking of you for just a fleeting moment, your memory was now infecting every waking minute of his life.  He tugs at his tie, throat growing thick at Ominis and Anne’s pokes into his personal life.

Anne gives him a pitying look. “She’s still around, you know.”

“Why would that matter to me?” Sebastian chokes out.

“Just talk to her—“

“She left!” Sebastian roars, smacking a stack of files off Ominis’s desk.  Anne looks unphased as the papers float to the ground. “I leave her for one night, and I come home the next morning to my flat, empty, couch gone. No note, no warning. We had one fight and she left me!”

“You said you wanted to cheat on her, Seb.” Anne reminds him.

“But I didn’t!” Sebastian huffs, red in the face.  The floodgates are open, words spilling from his mouth. “I wanted her to be mad, to be jealous!  I wanted her to miss me!” 

Involuntary tears prick at the corners of his eyes, threatening to fall down his cheeks. He can’t bring himself to admit the truth–that selfishly, he’d wanted to hurt you, to push you to your limits to see how you’d react. How he never could’ve imagined you’d actually leave. That his heart had cracked into pieces after finding the flat cleared out, and the shards had turned to dust when he realized weeks later that you weren’t coming home.

“Do you still want her to miss you?” Anne asks.

Yes, Sebastian thinks. His heart would probably explode out of his body if he were to ever find out you missed him.

“No,” he spits out. “I’m over her.”

Anne gives him a distrustful look, and Sebastian has to turn away in shame.

“I think you’ll find life to be a lot easier to digest when you stop lying to yourself,” Anne shrugs, folding her hands in her lap. “I don’t want to watch you waste your life away like this, Seb.  You miss her, and that’s okay.  You loved her.  Don’t sit here and pretend that you’re happy.”

“I’m happy,” Sebastian grunts. “I have a great life, Anne.  I’m the best junior auror on the force, I have plenty of friends.  I can go wherever I want, do whatever I want, and I don’t need to answer to anyone.  What makes you think I’m not happy?”

Anne’s face twists again, this time with a sad, pitiful look. “We’re twins, Sebastian.  I know you. I’ve known you forever.  I know things can never be as it was, but Ominis is right.  You have to make peace with the past, or talk to her.”

“It’s not about her,” Sebastian snarls again, crossing his arms.

“You got shitfaced and left my wedding after you stole the tag off her present.” Anne declares. “Tell me now how it’s not about her.”

“Whatever. I can’t talk to you when you’re acting like this.” Sebastian huffs, turning on his heels back towards the fireplace. “Send an owl when you’re feeling like yourself again.”

Anne leans against Ominis’s desk, her hands fidgeting with her skirt. “Likewise.  We can talk once you’ve figured out everything, and when you’re acting like yourself again.” she says coolly. “Otherwise, I don’t want to speak to you.”

“Ultimatums and threats, how very Gaunt of you.” Sebastian blurts out, regretting the words as soon as they leave his mouth.  Why would he even dare to say such a thing? 

Anne is unphased, shaking her head as she brushes dust off her skirt. “There you go again–trying to hurt someone you love, just to get a rise out of them. Seb, grow up. Don’t talk to me again until you’ve figured it out.”

Sebastian can’t bear to look at Anne, so he grabs a fistful of floo powder and disappears into the green flame.

“Another.” Sebastian demands, pushing his glass towards the new barmaid.

The woman raises her brow.  Elsie, Elise, whatever the fuck her name is.  She’s relatively new, and less obliging than the other bartenders Sebastian has come to know at the Three Broomsticks.  Although he might not have much pull anymore–the other bartenders seem to have gone cold towards their favorite regular, especially after he’d ditched their colleague Alexandra at the wedding with a duplicate guest.

“I’m afraid I’d be over-serving you, sir.” she says, polishing a tankard. “I think that’s enough for tonight.”

Sebastian rolls his eyes, turning the barstool around to appraise tonight’s crowd.  It’s a Saturday, but there appears to be slim pickings amongst the crowd. Nary a pretty woman in the room.  He leans his elbows back against the bar top, scanning for any viable conquests. 

And then, the bell on the door rings.

Sebastian freezes, pint in hand.  He’d always imagined how this day might go–how it would feel to see you again.  He always pictured himself being brave, too cool to care.  Merlin, he might’ve even gotten some satisfaction out of seeing you be a bit miserable. 

But you’re not.  You’re laughing.  Oh god, how could you be laughing?

He’s frozen in place, standing rather sheepishly at the bar as he watches you, giggling on the arm of some stranger.  Sebastian could care less what he looks like, rather fixating on you instead. His heart swells at the sound of your voice for the first time in years, the playful lilt to your question.

Should we sit down here, or upstairs?

Your date tells you to go upstairs, while he meanders over to the bar to get drinks. “One whiskey, on the rocks, and…some drink with gin.  Er, with lemons?”

A white lady.  Gin, orange liquor, egg whites, lemon juice , Sebastian screams in his head.  It’s embarrassing how quickly that knowledge came back to him.  The entire history of you floods into his brain, a dam he’d built over the years of your estrangement destroyed with the mere sound of your giggle. You always favored gin in your drinks, but despised when things were too sweet, too fruity.  The key to your heart was understanding your sense of taste.  Sebastian recalls the nights he’d make dinner for you, before your shifts at St. Mungo’s.  He was no chef, but you always praised his cooking.  Pretty noises coming from your mouth as you savored braised mushrooms over pasta, the way your tongue ran over your lips when he made chicken–

Why did you break up again?

Images play over and over in his mind.  You scoffing at him, your career being more important than his.  Screaming, fighting, going days without seeing each other.  His teeth sunken into the neck of someone he didn’t know. A book thrown at his head, a coffee mug missing a handle. 

Right. That again.

Sebastian snaps out of his thoughts as your date takes two drinks up the stairs.  He follows on careful feet; if he’s learned anything in his years of being an auror, it’s how to follow with stealth.  He hides beneath the creaky wooden staircase, concealed by the darkness.  Yet through the wooden steps, he can see you sitting at the table, and the way your smile falters when your date drops a fruity concoction in front of you.  He wonders if this is your first date–no, you’re far too comfortable leaning into his touch for this to be a first date.  Perhaps a third, maybe a fourth. 

“You did promise me if we made it to our fourth date that you’d tell me,” the man across from you says. Sebastian feels a bit proud for knowing you well enough, but sick at the thought of you being close to anyone.

“Tell you what?” you ask, feigning innocence as you fake a sip of your sugary drink.

“If you’ve ever been in love,” he croons. Sebastian winces, remembering just how excruciating it is to be in the early days of a relationship. At least then he’d been sixteen; he can’t imagine asking such cringey questions as a grown adult. 

You roll your eyes, leaning back into your chair. “That’s such a cheesy question,” you scoff.

Even when you’re not together, you two are on the same page.

“It says a lot about a person,” your date shrugs. “You have been in love, haven’t you?”

You roll your eyes once more, wincing as you take a sip from your beverage. “I have,” you announce, holding up a finger. “Just once.”

“And?” the man pries. “What happened?”

“What always happens.” you shrug. “You get older, and you fall out of love.”

“Indulge me,” your date asks, leaning his chin into his palm. “What was it about him?”

Sighing, you lean forward.  Sebastian wishes he could cast a disillusionment charm, get closer to see the look on your face as you condense your love story into a palatable tale for this stranger.  He wants to know if you’ll do it justice.  

“We were sixteen,” you muse. “It felt like we’d grown up together, that we could do anything.  And for a while, we could.  But then we had jobs, friends, and lives we had to explore outside of each other. Suddenly, we needed different things. We just couldn’t love each other the way we wanted to.” 

Sebastian wrinkles his nose. That’s it?  That’s all you’ll say about the great love you shared, a measly five sentences?  That you drifted apart, you grew up?  He has half a mind to march up the stairs and confront you right this moment. In fact, one foot is already ahead of the other, emerging from the darkness. 

“In the spirit of honesty, can I tell you something?” you ask. “I absolutely hate fruity drinks.”

Sebastian stops in his tracks.  You hate complaining, let alone correcting someone.  You never complained once during your tenure at Hogwarts, nor did you complain at the simplest offenses.  He and Ominis would have to practically beg you to send back food if your order came out wrong.  Imelda would roll her eyes every time you apologized for sending a beater your opponent’s way.  Hell, half the reason the two of you broke up was because you could hardly confront him, moving your belongings out of your shared apartment to avoid conflict.

Yet here you are, finally open and honest about something.  You’ve grown, he realizes. Has he?

“Excuse me,” your date clears his throat.  Sebastian is drawn out of his thoughts as the dark-haired man bumps into him at the foot of the stairs. 

“Sorry mate,” Sebastian says hurriedly, turning his back.  Hopeful that you haven’t seen him lurking quite yet, he pushes through the throngs of people in the pub, all blocking his way to the front door.

“Oi, Sallow!” the barmaid yells, and he curses under his breath, stopping in his tracks. “You forgot your tab.”

Sebastian digs through the pockets of his cloak, pulling out a few sickles to cover his drinks.  He turns toward you on the second floor, wondering if you’d heard his name. You hadn’t; you were back to chatting animatedly with the stranger, his hand resting on your forearm.

Sebastian slams the sickles down on the bar top, pulling the hood on his cloak over his head before turning on his heel. Rain pours outside, the water sliding his back as he rushes down the cobblestone street to his doorstep.  Your laugh haunts every step, mocking him all the way home.

Sebastian turns in his sleep, bedsheets tangled in his legs.  He’s not one to brag (Ominis would say otherwise if they were on speaking terms) but he’s not used to being alone in bed.  Not if he doesn’t want to be. 

He is alone tonight, his damp cloak discarded in the corner of his room where he kicked his clothes.  He lives alone, so he wasn’t quite sure why he was going through the motions of banging the cupboards, slamming his door.  The tea he’d made to sober up had gone cold, perched on the side table next to a myriad of dirty cups.  He nearly bangs his head against the wrought iron headboard, staring up at the dark ceiling.  There’s a tightness in his belly, an urge sparking his senses below.  

Fuck, he’s hard.

Sebastian grumbles to himself as his hand trails down his stomach, gripping his length. He’s sleeping in the nude—has been, ever since he got his own bachelor pad—and can’t help thinking about how much you would despise him for it.  You’d always been a stickler for pajamas, grumbling about him sitting in bed with dirty clothes.

Why is he thinking about you now, after all these years?  Sebastian grunts in displeasure as his cock twitches in his hand. He tries to focus on anything else—the blonde he’d kissed a few nights prior, or the woman with auburn hair who’d gripped his locks at the root when he’d sucked a mark into her neck.  Neither works in his quest for relief.  Begrudgingly, his thoughts fall towards you, distant memories he’s not even sure are real anymore.

They had been real, and so were you.  Sebastian paces his strokes, biting hard into his lower lip as his memories flood back. He furrows his brow as he pictures you, sidling up next to him in bed.  You’d always crawl back underneath the sheets after a long night in the ward, getting home with just an hour or two left before Sebastian would have to wake and get ready for work. He tightens his grip at the memory of you, nosing his cheek as your hand replaces his. 

“You know I hate when you go to bed without pants,” you whisper against his neck, teeth grazing his pulse.

”I do,” he murmurs, letting you take over. His hand falls back against the pillow, arms above his head as he sighs into your touch.  He swears he can feel your hands ghosting over his body, firm grip pumping his cock up and down.  He groans audibly when your thumb glides over the glistening head, a gasp caught in the back of his throat as he feels your lips pressing a tentative kiss against it.  

“Please,” Sebastian pleads. “Please.”

He’s not sure what he’s begging for, but his right hand crashes against his mouth, a pathetic whimper spilling past as he feels your mouth envelop him. Your hands brace his thighs, a curtain of hair brushing his hips as your head bobs up and down. He’s loud, louder than he’s been in years—you always brought that out of him, loving how vocal he could be. 

You hum against him; he knows you’re looking up at him, a devilish grin on your lips. Sebastian doesn’t dare to look down at you, worried you’ll disappear the moment he tries.

“Good morning,” you gasp, popping off of his cock.  Your hand replaces your mouth, the filthy sound of your spit and his come pounding alongside his heartbeat in his ears.

Sebastian can’t stop himself, his hips rolling upwards.  A garbled noise falls out of his mouth as he opens his eyes.  You’re gone—you were never here to begin with.  He fucks up into his fist with urgency, his eyes stinging as he chases his climax.  Sebastian lets out a guttural groan as he spills into his palm, a tear rolling down his cheek as he heaves, coming back down to earth.

You were never here, Sebastian reminds himself. A fucking memory, that’s all.  An end to a means, a way to get off.  That doesn’t make him feel any better as he rolls over to his night stand, picking up his wand.  He mutters a quick cleaning spell, rustling the sheets to the end of his bed as he lays, staring at the ceiling. Not real, not real, not real.   The two words comfort him, eyes fluttering back to sleep.

Your laugh replays in his mind anyways.

Sebastian rolls the vial in his hands, fingers hesitating at the stopper.  It’s standard issue for aurors to have their own personal pensieve, especially once they’re at the senior level. Sebastian has been trusted with his own pensieve, the only junior auror on the force to have one.  It’s an important tool, one he uses to peruse old memories.  They’re useful if you need to observe an old crime scene, hone in on a suspect’s face.

Fuck it, Sebastian thinks, pulling the stopper out.  The silvery memory floats down from the glass to the swirling waters, and he’s reminded of the first time he’d used a pensieve—he’d been with you.  He shudders as he lowers his face to the milky surface, falling into a memory he’s tried to forget.

It was raining that night.  He follows his past self up the stairs to the old flat he’d shared with you, stopping to take a sobering breath before pushing the door in.  He can see you sitting at the dinner table, arms crossed over a white muslin dress.  You look so angry with him—you always looked so angry in those final days of your relationship.  

“Where the hell have you been?” You snap, and both versions of himself flinch.

“Out,” his past self growls. “Why does that matter to you?”

You stare at him with furrowed brows. “This was my only day off of the week, Sebastian. I wanted to spend it together.  You’re always going on and on about how we don’t spend enough time together, yet every time I even make an effort you don’t even show—“

”Merlin forbid I want to celebrate a good day at work with my colleagues,” the younger Sebastian snarls, a hiccup lining the edge of his sentence as he slams his bag down on the table.

”You reek,” the past version of you declares, nose wrinkling. “Of booze.  How long have you been drinking?” You lean in, sniffing his neck.  Sebastian instinctively moves his arm, trying to pull you away.  It’s no use; it’s an illusion, his hand passes right through your skin. 

“Is that perfume?” Your voice falters.

”You’re imagining things,” Sebastian accuses.

”Don’t lie to me, Sallow.” You roar. “I smell perfume on your neck.”

Sebastian flinches when his younger self whirls around on his heel. “And so what if I smell like perfume?” He screeches.

Your face crumbles, and Sebastian has to force himself to look.  You look so much younger, with full cheeks and wide eyes.  He’d forgotten you’d plaited your hair at the top, just the way he’d liked it.  He remembered tugging on your braids when the two of you were still in school, before you’d even started dating.  That was ages ago, yet his heart still yearns for those days.

”Sebastian, have you been with someone else?”

The words still prick his heart, yet he forces himself to keep watching. His younger self stands there, a blank expression on his face.

”What if there was someone else?”

“Is there someone else?”

The younger Sebastian stands firm, arms folded over his chest.  This is it, the moment his heart closed to you.  This is when your relationship slipped down the drain. He doesn’t flinch with his next words, all aimed at you.  He’s playing the offense now, drawing blood with his words.

She’s nice, and she actually cares to listen to me.  I didn’t kiss her—but damn, I wanted to.

Sebastian perches on the table, knowing what comes next.  You don’t bother with tears—you’d cried enough in the last few months of the relationship, trying to salvage damaged goods.  There’s nothing left to give.  You pick up the closest book, hurling it at Sebastian’s face.  The book passes through the real Sebastian, his past self ducking just in time for it to slam against the wall.  The book falls to the ground with a thud, spine dented from the wooden beam.

His past self curses, knocking into the closest table.  Your favorite mug, the one with the funky handle, goes flying off the surface, the handle breaking off.

”I’m going to Ominis’s, until you can be a reasonable adult,” his past self roars, tugging the hood of his cloak over his head.

No, Sebastian screams. Don’t go.  She won’t be home when you come back.

”Sebastian!” You wail.  His head snaps to you, hands balled into fists at your side. He’d never noticed the look of despair on your face, the longing in your eyes. “I—“

The memory ends with a slammed door, your voice far away. He didn’t even give you the chance to finish your sentence.  Sebastian is forced out of the memory, head jolting out of the stone basin with nowhere else to go.

It’s the first time he’s forced himself to relive the memory.  It’s different than he remembered; he doesn’t look nearly as confident as he thought he did.  He doesn’t need to watch the rest to remember how it felt.  After a night spent on Ominis’s settee, sleeping off the alcohol, he’d walk back into the flat prepared with an apology.  He’d slip the key into the lock, calling out your name.  You’d probably be asleep in anticipation of your night shift, but he wouldn’t be able to wait.  He would burst through the bedroom, but you wouldn’t be in bed.  In fact, all of your belongings would be gone, leaving half of the flat bare.  No note, no goodbye.  He’d spend the better half of a day banging on Poppy’s door, only for her to snap at him in response. 

She doesn’t want to speak to you ever again. Every friend had said it, and Sebastian took it to heart.  Perhaps it would take you a couple of days, a few weeks at most to forgive him.  Weeks turned into months, and before long it was a year.  He moved into his own apartment in Diagon Alley.  Poppy and Imelda stopped talking to him entirely, and Natty would only speak to him at work.  It wasn’t much longer that he started chatting up women at the pub, going on dates.  You became a distant memory, his teenage love, a chapter he’d left behind.

Sebastian thought it would give him some closure. That he’d accept being the asshole, finally put you away for good.  Seeing your handwritten note to Ominis and Anne had only eroded his stone heart, dripping away at his resolve.  Hearing you laugh was like taking a pickaxe to the chest, and your summary of the relationship had been the killing blow. It’s like you didn’t even care; simply shrugging off what had been the longest and most defining relationship of his life.  

Isn’t that what he wanted?

Sebastian slumps against the basin, fingertips drumming against the edge.  It’s classic, really, textbook Sebastian Sallow to ruin everything.  He still remembers the way he pushed away Ominis, had forsaken Anne’s wants and needs when it came to her curse.  The unforgivable curse falling past his lips, regretting the words while he says them.  He’d crumpled in your arms, sobbing against your robes that night.  You’d given him a second chance at life, to be a better brother, a better friend.  He promised he wouldn’t squander the opportunity, choosing love over anger.

But falling in love with you hadn’t been a choice.  It had been natural, the easiest thing Sebastian had ever done.  He’d loved you so hard, too much—he’d wanted to marry you, for Merlin’s sake.  That all changed when you started working the night shift.  You spent less time together, and even moments at home were spent studying.  You balked at his touch, preferring the company of a book and a cup of tea instead.  He felt his walls go up, guarding himself from pain.  It couldn’t hurt if he hurt you first, he recalled. He’d bite the hand that fed him, and that would give him an advantage.  

Sebastian splashes the water in the pensieve, the silvery threads of his memory tangling in his fingers.  How easy it would be to store it away, destroy it forever. Fuck, he’d obliviate himself if he could.  He could move on with his life, finally be rid of you. 

Your name, scrawled on parchment.  The lilt of your laugh, the way your cheeks still turn pink when you smile.  The memory of your hair brushing against him in the morning, how just the memory of you is enough to make him hard.  Fuck, he loves you—he’s always loved you.  He’s always going to love you.  Who do you think you are, to stay this long?  Perhaps he’s afraid of you, how powerful you are to have this hold on him. 

Sebastian carefully collects the memory with the tip of his wand, letting it seep back through his ears and into his mind.  It hurts, still a heavy weight on his heart. But better to have it, to have a piece of you.  He knows he’s done irreparable harm, and he can’t change who he was then.  Sebastian has been given a plethora of second chances in his life, and he’s likely run up on any good karma he has left.

You deserve better, Sebastian thinks. He hopes you’re happy.  He wonders if you’re still enjoying the night shift, still at the top of your field.  His mind trails off to the man you were sharing drinks with—perhaps you’ve found love again. He shudders at the thought of you walking down the aisle to a faceless man, but there’s nothing he can do.  He made his bed, and he’ll lie in it.

Sebastian can only resolve to be better.  Maybe in time he’ll get back into Ominis and Anne’s good graces. Be a better brother, a better friend.  He shuts the cover on the pensieve, pushing it back into the corner of his bedroom.  His eye catches the book on his shelf with a dented spine before he straightens his tie, collecting his cloak to leave for work.

He can be better. Maybe. For now, he’ll settle on drinks after work, praying you don’t walk into the same pub as him ever again.

Sebastian’s breath is knocked out of his chest.  You’re sitting at the table with Poppy, Andrew’s chair pulled up next to them.  You look breathtaking, dressed in a pretty lace gown with matching gloves on your hands.  Your hair is piled atop your head in a fashionable way, and you’re blinking up at him expectantly.  He can barely look you in the eyes, lest he crumple at the knees.

”Emergency meeting,” he utters gloomily. “Ruined a good lunch.”

That’s all you have to say?  He berates himself in his mind as Andrew and Everett bid you farewell.  Your eyes turn back disappointedly to the cutlery on the table, and Sebastian screams internally as his colleagues drag him away from the table on unsteady feet.

”Pull yourself together, man.” Everett rolls his eyes. “You’re acting like you’ve seen a ghost.  And considering how many ghosts we knew at school, it’s a little embarrassing.”

“I can’t,” Sebastian mutters. “That’s the first time I’ve seen her in years.”

”Years?” Andrew’s eyes widen. “You’ve really gone that long?”

Years, Sebastian thinks.  Years since you left.  Years since he fought with Anne and Ominis after their wedding, years since he froze under the stairs at the Three Broomsticks, hearing you recount your love story to a new flame.  He’s thought of you every day since.

”That’s depressing,” Everett whistles low. “I never want to fall in love.”

“It’s sweet, really.” Andrew points out. “You never forget your first love, even after you’ve moved on.”

”Moved on?” Sebastian asks.

Everett gives him a sympathetic look, scratching his head. “Er, I thought you noticed—the giant diamond on her hand?  I heard she was engaged.” He confesses. “Sorry mate.  Natsai told me.”

Of course Natty wouldn’t tell him , Sebastian thinks.  She’s hardly spoken to him in years, despite working in the same department.  She’s dutifully ignored him, only daring to speak about work related matters.  The moment your conversations turn towards your personal lives, she would disappear.

”I’m happy for her,” he chokes out, trying to sound convincing.  He knows it isn’t.

”Well, you’re happy now too, aren’t you?” Andrew tries to cheer up the conversation. “The bachelor life suits you.”

Sebastian isn’t sure that’s true.

They apparate back to the ministry, all of the aurors crowded into the office to help with a massive case. Sebastian is hardly listening during the mission debrief.  His mind is elsewhere, on you.  He wonders if you’re marrying the man from the bar, the one with the cheesy questions.  He swallows thickly at the thought of you in love, real love this time.  Something that would last.

He wants to call on Anne.  They haven’t spoken since he’d fought with Ominis after their wedding, his twin holding strong to her words.  She wanted to see him grow, to confront his feelings before coming back to her.  Maybe now was a good time—Anne was always a good shoulder to cry on.

Sebastian had expected a decent fight, but this one takes the cake.  It’s the most intense of his auror career so far, battling what feels like an army of ashwinders who’ve rallied to terrorize the highlands once more. The fight isn’t fair; it’s brutal, several of his fellow aurors falling on the scene.  Andrew has a nasty gash, arms slung around both him and Everett as they try to get to a safe floo point. They might splinch if they try to apparate, and Andrew is looking pale enough as it is.

“Wild day, isn’t it?” Everett chuffs, straining as they lift Andrew and his bleeding leg. The floo point is about twenty feet away, but it’s an uphill climb. “We need to get him to St. Mungo’s, stat.” He says your name, wondering if you’re on duty to help with Andrew’s injury.

”She works the night shift,” Sebastian blurts. He doesn’t even know if you still work nights—it’s just the only thought that comes to mind.

”Well, maybe she’ll be there and you can stop acting like you’ve got doxies for brains.” Andrew snorts, wincing in pain.

”She looks happy,” Sebastian admits. “Beautiful. Merlin, I forgot how beautiful she is.”

Sebastian feels Andrew tugging on his shoulder, panic laced through his voice.  He turns to see an ashwinder, appearing out of nowhere.  The masked man has his wand raised, pulling his arm back to inflict a curse.  Sebastian can see he’s aiming at Everett, the incantation on his lips.

Sebastian doesn’t hesitate.  He lets go of Andrew, letting him topple over onto the grass.  He dives in front of his partner, the bolt of green magic electrifying him as he lands with a thud on the ground.  He can’t tell if he’s yelling, or if it’s Clopton.  He feels cold and wet, streaks of red blossoming on his crisp white shirt.  

“We have to get him to St. Mungo’s!” Everett roars. “I don’t care, apparate! Get us out of here!” 

Andrew crawls over to his side.  He asks Sebastian to forgive him, curling his arms around him as they apparate away from the scene.  Sebastian feels like he’s being pushed through a piece of straw, landing on the cold marble floor of the St. Mungo’s intensive care ward. Healers are already running amok, trying to help the others coming in from the scene. A healer is sending a patronus message, rabbit bouncing off the walls before disappearing to relay a message.  He wants to lift his head, check the room to see if you’re there.  When he tries, Clopton chastises him, holding him down to the floor.

We have to stop the bleeding, someone says. What bleeding?  He’s just cold.  

“Can someone get me a blanket?” Sebastian slurs, words garbled in his throat.

He hears someone saying your name. “We’ve called in the head of the ward,” they say. “She’s on her way in as we speak.”

“We know her,” Andrew insists, still holding his hand down tight against Sebastian’s chest.  He’s not sure why Andrew is clutching him so tightly, clamping down on his sternum.

”She’ll know how to stop the bleeding,” the healer assures him. “She’ll figure it out—her magic always does the trick.”

That’s all he needs to know. Sebastian shuts his eyes, the sounds of the ward disappearing against the ringing in his ears.  He’ll be okay, especially if you’re on the way. Deep down, Sebastian knows he’s in good hands.

[skaldish]

Is it normal to not be satisfied in Norse Paganism? Like I do offerings and such but I feel disconnected from the gods and the religion?

Maybe it’s because I’m comparing it to Christianity too much, but there’s no thing of just praying to a god for the sake of it, to talk, there always has to be a practical purpose. And with offerings it just feels transactional to me, like I’m buying a service. I feel like I settled for it because it was the closest thing I could find to what I wanted in a religion, but I’m not really getting what I want out of it.

Should I just be content anyhow?

No, of course not! You don't have to settle for dissatisfied, especially not with something as important as your religion/spirituality.

Fortunately, Norse Paganism/Heathenry is so much more than just this strange, transactional dynamic.

Unfortunately, information about "what Heathenry is" is still very inaccessible to anyone outside of Northern Europe. If you're from the Americas like I am, my guess is that you're running into the same issue I ran into when I initially came to Heathenry: The realization that there's very little depth to the things people say are what you do to be Heathen.

The missing piece here is the cultural worldview.

Heathenry actually has no centralized orthodoxy or orthopraxy. There's no doctrines you need to follow, codes of morality you need to adopt, or practices you need to observe. There is no distinction between the sacred or profane, no dualism, no concept of blasphemy, and no concept of sin.

The notion that we need to treat the gods like lords tonserve or paragons to emulate is actually foreign to Heathenry. This mentality has its roots in ancient Roman culture, rather than originating with the Norse people.

Instead, the Norse gods are viewed more like celebrities—that is, celebrated and cherished figures. They're local spirits, folk heroes, and ancestors who organically grew popular and widespread because people liked their energy and their folklore.

Ultimately, kind of relationship you have with deities is between you and them. As in, this is something that grows organically out of your interactions with them. The relationships are built the same as ever.

To illustrate my point: I would hardly call my relationships with the gods "practical." I ask them all kinds of obnoxious questions. I ask them to teach me magic and how/why it works. I ask them to share the secrets of the universe. But most of the time, all I want is to hang out with them.

I'm more like Loki's playmate than I am his devout worshipper. We do bits, we "yes, and—," we egg each other on. I give him offerings, not because I feel like I need to, but because "sharing food with the people important to you" is a love language. He has a dedicated shrine, yes, but that's because I want him to have that space in my life.

I say all this to demonstrate that at the heart of Heathenry is the human condition. The Norse gods don't pretend otherwise.

Ask yourself what kind of relationship you would like with your deities, and approach them with that. And if you don't know? Let it flow naturally in your exchanges with them. Either way, allow yourself to have what it is you need out of your spirituality. It's yours, after all.

[jangmi-latte]

I don't usually simp for Lilia because the game has made me look at him as our friendly neighborhood grandpa, but like.... imagine meeting General!Lilia while he's on duty- and maybe he helps us with something or we help him out- and from there on a romance slowly blossoms? Just... active duty Lilia who's yet to become Lili-pa and the whole 'waiting for my friend who I want to be my lover to visit me during his break from duty'

FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD GRANDPA

good riddance mid-war/military romance?!?!? sign me up!!?!?? my brain has been going from camp-healer reader or to villager reader or subordinate reader or even agent reader (captain america and peggy carter type of romance)??? the possibilities are endless but since you emphasized helping we're going with villager who's also a healer reader.

/this can be descriptive and damn has it gotten long.

you can think of this being either fae or human reader but when you mentioned help, seeing an injured lilia who had to limp away from the camp after checking if his men are okay. so, he's in the middle of the woods hissing and sitting against a tree while lifting his clothing to see that big unhealing slash across his abdomen. the blood has already clotted but it's still dangerously huge and dirty and he's trying his best to heal it with his magic but it's concerning how he still feels the pain. plus, he needs to rest both his mana and body.

he will definitely try heating up one of his daggers to press on his wound but before he could even press the searing metal on his skin, that's when a hand stops him and pull the dagger away. it was a surprise, most especially for someone like him to be conscious of every single element around him.

you definitely look like a land of briar resident with your clothing. however, you look absolutely distressed and you're sweating so much it looked like you haven't bathed in days. he'd ask what are you doing but you keep your mouth shut and kneel down beside him. only then did he notice the belt strapped around your hips filled to the brim with antidotes and potions.

he's astonished, to say the least. he was in a daze while you're speaking and he was brought to his senses when he felt the burning sensation of liquid hitting his skin. it's literally smoking that he had to bite down on his gloved wrist to keep himself from screaming. his back arching off the tree while he's gripping your wrist. it hurt but hey, his wound his tingling and healing.

that's when he felt oddly...captivated by you. and as the old fae tradition goes, to he who was serviced must return the favor. he's just staring at you while taking deep breaths and you're looking around as if you're being watched. he assured you that you're safe with him and asked what do you want as gratitude for healing him but you just shook your head. stating that YOU are thanking him for defending the land.

all goes to say, he'd go to the said forest every now and then after you both departed, half-expecting to run into you. there were occasions he would see you crouched by a bush and plucking berries and herbs. he'd strike conversation, often surprising you with his silence and stealth. but eventually, you're warming up to him. he'd give you herbs you've mentioned needing that's only located across the other side of the land.

your presence was calming; during a war, peace was a far-fetched dream for a soldier, a general. when he's stressed, lacks sleep, and just exhausted he'd seek refuge in that very forest. he'd snap at you when you greet him but somehow, you're not affected. scary, yes. but you've known lilia from the constant meetings that you've brought some bottled mist that you claim can calm him down and give him a leveled-head again.

when he suddenly snaps his eyes open, that's when he realised he has fallen asleep without even noticing that he's definitely nonplussed. only then does he notice that he's laying on your lap while you're reading a book. he's bombarding you with questions but needless to say, he's really thankful.

baul would even notice lilia departing from the camp during breaks instead of eating with them that he's tempted to follow the general.

what can he do though? the general can find refuge somewhere else. more like...someone else.

to say he's catching feelings was questionable. other than malleficia, levan, baul, or mallenoa, he has never felt entirely close to someone outside of the royal guards or royalty. instinct driven need to protect you is there — that's what he feels towards the townsfolk anyways, that's what he tells himself.

just what have you done to the general...

might become a fic though 🫶🏻

[etrsilk]

I have a request for Killua with a farm girl. Like she’s a total sweetheart and has a country accent and is not from Japan. She’s from America, but she’s pretty cool, her Japanese isn’t the best either but she tries. I was thinking he met her in the chimera arc, him and gon go to a village to see the massacre because gon wanted to help the people there and she’s one of the people that survived and she doesn’t want to leave because she’s been very successful with her crops and selling and stuff.

Sorry if this is way to specific, just wanted to get this idea out there.

𝐖𝐖𝐖.𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓.𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄

₊✩‧₊˚ ᡣ𐭩 𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐔𝐀 𝐙𝐎𝐋𝐃𝐘𝐂𝐊 ⇝ 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐟𝐚𝐫𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

˗ˏˋ ➛ 𝙞𝙣𝙘𝙡𝙪𝙙𝙚𝙨: 𝘒𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘶𝘢

˗ˏˋ ➛ 𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜 — ✘

˗ˏˋ ➛ 𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚 — 𝘧𝘭𝘶𝘧𝘧

⎝ 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚:: here is your request! the beginning feels a bit like a one shot, I hope you don’t mind! It’s a bit of a special request but one that I loved doing! It’s funny as a French person to make such American requests ahah ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

➘ When you were 14, your family decided to move to a quaint little village in Japan. This change of country, culture, and language deeply affected you. You were not very happy to leave everything you knew behind. Even after three years, your accent was still noticeable, and you continued to struggle with Japanese, despite all the efforts you made to improve.

➘ These three years in Japan were marked by ups and downs. Your business flourished, and you became a popular and respected figure in the region. However, a new species of ants disrupted your life, destroying part of your crops and tarnishing your reputation. Despite this setback, you remained hopeful about rebuilding your empire and were determined not to give up. When a group of Hunters came to ask you to evacuate, you initially refused firmly, aware of the risks your precious animals would face. Eventually, feeling lost and overwhelmed, you sat on a hay bale, silently crying, until two young boys, Gon and Killua, came to offer their help.

➘ This was the beginning of a beautiful story. After helping you move your animals, a special bond formed between you and Killua. Gon, noticing his friend’s blushes, urged him to take your phone number, sensing something magical between you two.

➘ Two years later, here you are, engaged! Killua is not particularly fond of farm life, but he makes an effort for you. He often teases you about your American accent and your Japanese mistakes, but deep down, he greatly admires your progress and is very proud of you.

➘ He also dreams of visiting your birthplace, perhaps for your honeymoon…? It would be a wonderful way to discover together the roots of the one he loves so much.

—English is not my first language, so sorry for any mistakes!!

[qqueenofhades]

Do you think part of what makes people feel like voting isn’t worth it because things don’t get better under democrats is because we can’t see what would have happened? Like I see a lot of people saying “well biden hasn’t made america much better so there’s no point” but it’s like they don’t understand that under a republican they would actively do everything they could to cause more harm. It’s like they don’t understand that 1. The president can’t do much, and 2. IT WOULD BE WORSE. like they don’t understand the possibilities. Idk people just frustrate me

I'm sorry, as I know you're just relaying what these people think and not claiming so yourself, but the whole "things don't get better under Biden/Democrats" line to which we are subjected so very, miserably often is a lie!!! It is demonstrably a lie! It is peddled by people who deliberately live in their echo-chamber leftist misinformation bubbles and either don't read the news, don't accept anything less than the Magical Socialist Revolution Now, and don't think partial or incremental progress (aka the only kind of progress that exists) is valid. "Biden hasn't single-handedly fixed everything wrong with America and the world after the most damaging presidency ever to exist and 250+ years of flaws, while other countries actually are their own actors with agency making complex choices, so we shouldn't vote for him" is a bullshit lie and I'm tired of it!!!

(Again. Sorry. This is not directed at you. This is just my frustration with this entire ridiculous situation speaking.)

We have had multiple elections now where people voted for Democrats, which resulted in abortion protections, protections for LGBTQ people, the biggest climate legislation ever to pass Congress/be signed into law (the Inflation Reduction Act), vast improvements in the job market, executive actions both large and small, improvements in labor and the economy, a general democratic system, a defense of the rule of law, a warning against fascism, and everything else that Trump trampled on in 4 years and will finish the job of doing if this godforsaken country is either right-wing-zealot or left-wing-zealot enough to put him back into office. (Like, people. Google is free. You're welcome to look up the improvements Biden has actually made, but that would harm your Narrative.) So much of this misinformation is also peddled by people who are proud that they don't have a clue how the American government works and/or deliberately lie about it: see all the claims that it was Biden's fault for not magically stopping a Trump-stacked SCOTUS, selected for the express purpose of overturning Roe, from overturning Roe. Because the president could just unilaterally overturn the Supreme Court with no problems at all if He Really Wanted To, I guess. Even if that is literally not the way it has ever functioned in history.

All the noxious Republicans in state legislatures passing anti-trans/anti-abortion/anti-voting laws ARE NOT SOMETHING BIDEN CAN STOP. If you're going to criticize him for not doing something, for God's sake at least make it for something he can do (like not calling for a ceasefire in Gaza, though I would argue he's already taking a more nuanced approach than the entirety of the American establishment during the War on Terror). And then vote for him when/if he follows it up, not just throw your hands in the air and scream about how you Can't Possibly Sully Yourself (especially when there is some very selective support going on here and a deliberate white-washing of how many orders of magnitude worse absolutely everything else in America and the world would be under Trump. So.)

I'm tired of it. I'm really, really tired of it. I've been trying to cut back on my politics posting because my mental health is bad right now and I often feel like a broken record screaming into the void. But. Yeah. Anyway. Whoof.

[milligramspoison]

Welcome to the FOB edition of this list! I originally did this with MCR :)

North America

LIVE DEBUT OF G.I.N.A.S.F.S. (Chicago)

CHRIS LIVESTREAMED THE SHOW

Live debut Heaven, lowa!!

Live debut of Baby Annihilation!

A cover of Crazy Train by Ozzy Osbourne!

The Take Over, the Breaks Over for the first time since 2017!

GIANT DOG HEAD BEHIND PATRICK

Someone wore a Mikey Fuckin' Way shirt to the show (he's already somehow made his way into this list and it's only night one)

Someone else wore a Hey Chris shirt

The Pink Seashell was the intro!

They opened up the tour with LFTOS (it's called Otherside on the official setlist!)

GINASFS being labeled GOLF on the setlist

William Beckett and a handkerchief

They played Don’t Stop Believin’ by Journey!

They played Fake Out for the first time with Joe!

New merch tour merch!

CLANDESTINE MERCH

Security/ushers going hard during Centuries!

Pete straight up disappearing off the face of the earth before Crazy Train

Setlist got leaked (very reminiscent of one of MCR hometown shows lol)

Not tour content but Pavlove has randomly appeared on Spotify but is currently unplayable (Maryland Heights)

Patrick was spotted watching the openers!

A paper had to be made for presumably security to not mistake the guys as a concert goer (fucking hilarious)

Andy was also spotted watching the openers!

THEY'RE PLAYING RAY'S ICONIC SPOKEN WORD PART OF I'M NOT OKAY BETWEEN SETS

Each city is getting its own special shirt!! (This was revealed during the Missouri show!)

Setlistfm user mommymilkers live updating the setlist for us (icon)

LIVE DEBUT OF WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE

GIN JOINTS FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2008

JOE SINGING DURING CHICAGO

No one could tell if they either played Gin Joints or Tell That Mick at first

Setlistfm saying they covered Super Bass by Nicki Minaj (it was a troll but a funny one)

Patrick saying he wants to talk to the dog during This Ain't a Scene

Pete petting the dog

Pete giving his pick to a young fan <3

Stardust Funhouse! (Bonner Springs)

Fans with vip packages get their own magic 8 ball! (This has been happening since Chicago but wasn't revealed until night 3 of the tour!)

Patrick and Andy were watching Alkaline Trio together :)

PATRICK IS WEARING THE FEDORA

TOUR DEBUT OF HUM HALLELUJAH

I’M LIKE A LAWYER FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2014

SOPHOMORE SLUMP ALSO FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2014

More trolls saying they covered ME! by Taylor Swift

“Fall Out Boy is my favorite fucking band”

New (I think) BMTH merch! (Woodlands)

BMTH joining the tour! (Been waiting for them since the announcement lol)

FOB SETLIST GOT LEAKED AGAIN

BMTH fans exploding over the fact that Kingslayer wasn't on BMTH's setlist

FOB fans being sad over the fact Pete isn't wearing his skirt (I think someone lied about this so understandable tbh)

THEY COVERED SOMEBODY TO LOVE BY QUEEN

THEY ALSO COVERED TAKE ON ME BY A-HA

Someone on setlistfm trolling everyone by saying they performed Golden for the first time since 2007

Someone else also trolling on setlistfm saying they covered Princess Diana by Ice Spice

Same troll mentioned above saying Ice Spice was there

More trolls saying they did WAP by Cardi B

LIVE DEBUT OF KINTSUGI KID

MORE trolls saying they did I Write Sins and Viva Las Vengeance by P!ATD (the trolls were really annoying tonight tbh)

What a surprise more trolls saying they covered Dear John by Taylor Swift

“I DRESS THIS WAY BC IF THE CROWD IS FEELING HOT AND MISERABLE THEN IM GONNA BE HOT AND MISERABLE WITH YOU GUYS WE'RE IN THIS TOGETHER”

Patrick getting a friendship bracelet and having some banter with Pete <3

The lovely @andoutofharm leaking the setlist for us that says Kansas City even though they're in Dallas (Dallas is proving to be chaos) (wasn’t actually tonight’s setlist but funny it was there)

Joe is hiding his book for fans similar to how MCR hid drumsticks for fans!

Clandestine merch returns in Dallas!

Oli giving FOB a brief shoutout before MANTRA!

PETE IS IN THE SKIRT

Speech about support staff!

Speech about TTTYG’s anniversary!!!

WHAT A CATCH DONNIE FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2013

THE (AFTER) LIFE OF THE PARTY FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2007

Pete walked around in the audience!

“Trying to keep it cool in Texas”

Patrick’s speech about imposter syndrome <3 (whole thing is very sweet and nice)

BMTH not performing in Phoenix :( (sad times)

PETE IS IN A SKIRT AGAIN

Patrick is wearing the black button up again but tucked in!

TAKE OVER AND HUM HALLELUJAH IN THE SAME NIGHT

Pete talking about prioritizing love <3

SPOTLIGHT BY PATRICK WAS FUCKING PLAYED HOLY SHIT

ALSO PATRICK’S FIRST TIME PLAYING SPOTLIGHT SINCE 2011

SPACE CAMP FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2013

They played one extra song tonight! (They usually play 27 songs a night)

Played the instrumental version of Stardust at the end of the show!

Patrick’s speech before Spotlight <3

Pete got Grimaced but Patrick lives on in peace lol

MIKEY FUCKIN WAY IS AT THE FUCKING SHOW (Chula Vista)

A COVER OF NOTHING COMPARES 2 U BY PRINCE

(COFFEE’S FOR CLOSERS) FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2009

Patrick and Pete didn’t do the waltz :(

MIKEY PLAYED FUCKING SATURDAY WITH THEM

MIKEY WITH PETE WHILE PLAYING SATURDAY

MIKEY RUNNING TO THE STAGE TO PLAY

Mikey posting Andy on his story <3333

PATRICK AND MIKEY HUGGING <33333333

Mikey with the entire band <3333333

I nearly spread an entire rumor that Mikey posted sim versions of FOB on his story (oops)

Pete doing this weird/messed up bow thing towards Patrick

“Love you dudes!” on Mikey’s story <33333

“My two dads” on Gabe’s story (never change Gabe)

Patrick stopping the show to make sure a fan is okay <3

Kristin reposting Mikey playing with FOB on her story <3

The pit during BMTH’s set

Oli is missing a fucking shoe

I predicted Mikey performing with FOB :3

Mr. Blue Sky cover! (LA night one)

GOLDEN FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2007

G.I.N.A.S.F.S. IS MAGIC 8 BALL ONCE AGAIN

AMERICA’S SUITEHEARTS FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2009

TWO MAGIC 8 BALL SONGS AS YOU CAN SEE ABOVE

They played 29 songs tonight!! (They usually about 27 songs a night)

PETE AND PATRICK HARMONIZED DURING SRAR

Pete spotting his trainer in the crowd (literally the equivalent of Gerard from MCR talking about their mailman during a show)

Patrick’s speech before medley <3

“New car smell stadium”

Demi Lovato was at the show and performed with Royal & the Serpent, one of the openers!

Pete being shipped to the audience (Amazon same day delivery)

America’s Suitehearts being labeled as ASS on the official setlist

Oli in a cult leader tank top (literally just says cult leader)

The band had a secret show earlier on in the day! (LA night two)

Technically tour stuff, but Pete possibly hinting at an MCR x FOB tour for 2024!

Someone on setlistfm deleting the entire setlist

LIVE DEBUT OF I’VE GOT ALL THIS RINGING IN MY EARS

A COVER OF EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE

SOPHOMORE SLUMP WITH WILLIAM BECKETT OF THE ACADEMY IS

THE (AFTER) LIFE OF THE PARTY ONCE AGAIN

LIVE FUCKING DEBUT OF BANG THE DOLDRUMS

Pete’s speech <3

Pete has a new jacket!

Saturday with Adam T. Siska!

“It looks like there's a lot of you, it's a little intimidating” ~ Patrick (Mountain View)

What A Catch Donnie once again!

A cover of Alison by Elvis Costello!

THE PATRON SAINT OF LIARS AND FAKES FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2013

Pete and Andy briefly turning the show into comedy hour

Pete stood on the piano (thanks piano)

Random guy checking his emails during BMTH’s set (lowkey pretty funny, shoutout to this iconic guy)

Not tour stuff but Electric Touch by Taylor Swift featuring FOB came out today! (July 7th) (West Valley City)

Patrick telling everyone to sing along to Grand Theft Autumn

Cover of Hold The Line by Toto!

THE KIDS AREN’T ALRIGHT FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2018

Someone having a Frerard license plate (honestly super funny)

Patrick saving a bug

Pete broke up a fight (pls don’t fight at concerts that’s not fucking cool) (Greenwood Village)

THEY DID FUCKING BANG THE DOLDRUMS AGAIN AND IT WASN’T EVEN MAGIC 8 BALL TIME

ACOUSTIC GUITAR FOR MEDLEY

PATRICK PLAYED AN ORIGINAL SONG BY HIS DAD <33333

Patrick’s dad is at the show! <3

NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2014

“The party tonight is awesome” ~ Pete

“The last thing you want to do is go and brag tomorrow that you got into a fight at a fucking Fall Out Boy show. And it wasn’t even with Bring Me The Horizon, y’know what I mean?” ~ also Pete

The song Patrick played from his dad is called Goin’ North!

There’s bubbles during Disloyal!! (This has been happening the entire tour but I haven’t seen anyone bring it up until the Colorado show!)

Cover of Peace Love and Understanding by Elvis Costello & The Attractions! (Rodgers)

I SLEPT WITH SOMEONE IN FOB FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2015

A speech about Stardust!

Patrick during Saturday <3

“I’m gonna go play Super Mario Brothers”

Pete chatted with a kid during the show <3

Storm delay just before FOB’s set, thankfully everyone was safe!! (Somerset)

Oli has lost his fucking shoe once again

Drunk guy took his pants off and had security chase him (hope they caught him)

THEY SOUNDCHECKED BANG THE DOLDRUMS

The venue is apparently in a cornfield

Only half the stage got set up :(

The dog is named Blitz (yes it took me till Wisconsin to learn it’s fucking name)

THE EYES ALSO FUCKING GLOW

“People ask us what it was like at old fob shows and the answer is that it was kind of like this, we would just play until the police kicked us out” ~ Pete lol

LIVE DEBUT OF FAME < INFAMY CONGRATS WISCONSIN YOU FUCKING DESERVE IT

No medley tonight (storm delay and strict curfew)

Also the shortest show of the tour so far! They played only 16 songs when they usually play about 27-28 songs (again storm delay and strict curfew)

One of the openers wore a cheesehead apparently!

BMTH’s drumhead says Steve for some reason??

Oli hugged a fan <3

OLI RAN THROUGH THE FUCKING MERCH STANDS

Double rainbow!! (Cincinnati)

LIVE DEBUT OF FAVORITE RECORD

Patrick being proud of himself after performing Favorite Record <3

Joe got a new tattoo entitled Z-Bone for his youngest daughter Zayda! <3

Troll on setlistfm saying they covered Harder, Better, Faster Stronger by Daft Punk lol (Noblesville)

Same troll saying they covered Mr. Brightside by The Killers and I Gotta Feeling by The Black Eyed Peas

Same troll saying they covered Peaches by Jack Black

Patrick skipping around <3

WHERE DID THE PARTY GO FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2014

Patrick randomly became a wizard during the show and made Pete disappear :3

Pete being a gamer boy on his ig and playing Fortnite <3

The same troll from the other night saying they covered Daft Punk (again) and fucking Nintendo (Cuyahoga Falls)

“I have like, 3 brain cells left” ~ Pete

MEDLEY HAD I’M LIKE LAWYER

Cover of Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen!

LIVE DEBUT OF 27

Pete smiling and waving to his two youngest kiddos, Saint and Marvel during Dance Dance <3

A fan also gave Meagan and the kiddos friendship bracelets! (Revealed in the tags in the link above!)

PETE’S IN A SKIRT (Bristow)

NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER ACCOUSTIC

TOUR DEBUT OF SHE’S MY WINONA

SHE’S MY WINONA FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2009

I FUCKING PREDICTED SHE’S MY WINONA

New merch for the magic 8 ball! (Charlotte)

Someone the day before the show put an entire fake setlist on setlistfm lol

A Jehovah’s Witness is at the show (slay ig)

And apparently another person randomly preached at the show??

Someone is also barking in the pit??

Lean On Me by Bill Withers cover!!

DEAD ON ARRIVAL FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2013

S’mores after the show is over on Pete’s story

Oli dedicated Can You Feel My Heart to FOB!

POSSIBLE 7 MINUTES SOUNDCHECK?? (Virginia Beach)

7 MINUTES FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2007

PATRICK PLAYED THE DRUMS

“Sing it with me, honey!” Patrick to Blitz during This Ain’t a Scene

In typical Florida fashion…severe thunderstorm warning to start off the night (West Palm Beach)

Karaoke by the merch stand!

Setlist got leaked!

8 ball hint is gator bites…

Andy is back!!!

PETE’S IN THE SKIRT

THEY COVERED DANCING QUEEN BY ABBA

TELL MICK FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2013

ACCIDENTALLY PREDICTED TELL MICK IN MY DMS WITH @frankierosbackbends

DEAD ON ARRIVAL IN PLACE OF CHICAGO TONIGHT (Tampa)

MISS MISSING YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2015

ALSO THE TOUR DEBUT OF MISS MISSING YOU

Facebook completely simping for Pete on instagram

Oli dedicated Can You Feel My Heart to FOB again!!

PATRICK MAY HAVE SANG FRICTION IN HIS JEANS (Atlanta)

Played Nothing Compares 2 U in honor of Sinead O’Conner as she passed away </3

LIVE DEBUT OF FROM NOW ON WE ARE ENEMIES

FOB (kinda) ARE IN THE FUCKING BARBIE MOVIE

Pete revealed in the RATS podcast that Saint (his youngest son) drew the backdrop for Blitz! (Clarkston)

William Beckett is at the show for whatever reason??

He also performed Chicago with FOB!

Trolls on setlistfm saying they covered Blood by MCR

Pete falling into the box during Crazy Train

DON’T YOU KNOW WHO I THINK I AM FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2007

Cover of Coffee Mug by Descendents as a tribute to Milo Auckerman

The crowd booing people who were fighting (Toronto)

Pete also mocking the people that were fighting

THEY CUT LAST OF THE REAL ONES

LIVE DEBUT OF WEST COAST SMOKER

I PREDICTED WEST COAST SMOKER

THE RETURN OF DOUBLE 8 BALL

Oli taking someone’s drink and BMTH posting the person’s reaction on their story (op got a good laugh out of it, I saw the video from their pov!)

Pete playing tennis at the venue just before tonight’s show! (Forest Hills)

PETE IS AIRDROPPING THE NEW GAMES WE PLAY SONG TO FANS

JUST ONE YESTERDAY FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2014 FOR MEDLEY

STEREO HEARTS AND CUPIDS CHOKEHOLD FOR MEDLEY AS WELL

TRAVIE FUCKING MCCOY PERFORMED WITH THEM

COVER OF ENTER SANDMAN BY METALLICA

LIVE DEBUT OF I AM MY OWN MUSE

DOUBLE FUCKING 8 BALL AGAIN

TRAVIE SAID GYM CLASS HEROES IS COMING BACK

Oli down in the pit saying “don’t tell Patrick” for whatever reason lol (Boston)

Joe posting a bunch before tonight’s show!!

I’m Shipping up to Boston cover by the Dropkick Murphys!

Cover of Sweet Caroline by Neil Diamond!

LIVE DEBUT OF WAMS DURING MEDLEY

XO FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2007

THIRD DOUBLE 8 BALL IN A ROW

“I’m standing in your spotlight now” Patrick to Pete during riff banter!!

“I like it, I like it” Pete to Patrick also during riff banter!!

GET BUSY FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2006 FOR MEDLEY (Darien)

Pete saying Patrick has a “teddy bear vibe but he gets the job done”

Patrick also blushed when Pete said that

LIVE FUCKING DEBUT OF YOU’RE CRASHING

FOURTH DOUBLE 8 BALL IN A ROW

DON’T STOP BELIEVIN’ AND ENTER SANDMAN IN THE SAME NIGHT

Pete saying Patrick reminds him of Josh Allen, the Buffalo Bills quarterback

Patrick also being incredibly confused by the bullet point above lol

Oli dedicated DiE4u to Snooki (Holmdel)

Pete’s bass very briefly caught on fire after The Phoenix…Pete is VERY THANKFULLY okay (this apparently happened at another recent show too)

Dead on Arrival was dedicated to RATS aka Royal & the Serpent!!

“We’re very happy you're part of our family” Pete to someone at their very first FOB show!!! <3

LIVE FUCKING DEBUT OF I’VE GOT A DARK ALLEY FOR MEDLEY

A mini stage was set up on the lawn for Pete for Dance, Dance!

LIVE DEBUT OF BOB DYLAN

FIFTH DOUBLE 8 BALL IN A ROW

Games We Play played bass for Pete during Saturday!!

Bob Dylan and I Am My Own Muse being labeled as Willie Nelson and Super Smash Bros on the setlist

They randomly played the national anthem at the show?? (It’s apparently a venue thing??)

Gabe Saporta trying to make it to the last show of the NA tour but LAX keeps delaying his flight :( (Camden)

Pete posting food onto his story that is presumably on Patrick’s piano to practice for medley lol

DEAD ON ARRIVAL WITH RATS!!!

Rats requested Dead On Arrival a bunch of times!!

“Awww :(” Patrick after Pete said that this is the last night of the us leg of the tour

JET PACK BLUES FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE 2018 FOR MEDLEY

Jet Pack Blues into I’ve Got a Dark Alley into Golden for medley </3

LIVE FUCKING DEBUT OF FUCKING PAVLOVE

TRIPLE FUCKING 8 BALL

Somehow fucking predicted a triple 8 ball a couple of days ago 0.0

manicpixiefinalgirl on tiktok started a Joe chant in the pit!!

Hello if you’ve made it this far!! Ty for taking the time to check this out and go through it all!

This will be back for FOB’s Japan shows later this month and for their shows in Europe in October and November, so stay tuned for that!

I had a fantastic time following the North American tour with everyone, can’t wait to do it again with you all soon! :)

[boxdstars]

Any personal HCs about what happens to the gang after Hogwarts?

GOD IM SO SORRY ANON 😭😭 I’m so bad at time management, whoever you are - please accept a forehead kiss as compensation

With that being said.. aside from my own little canon (and the joint-canon I share with each of my friends) I do have some general ideas for the kiddos!

Natsai undoubtedly becomes an Auror, it just feels heavily implied within her companion story. She’s looking for clues, standing up against the law to do things her own way, and doing what’s right. She wants to be better than those before her, and isn’t going to settle for not getting involved when she knows she can help. She’d also be much more prolific with her wandless magic.

Poppy being a magizoologist is another HC that just feels right. Of course she’d want to work with beasts, perhaps even pull a Charlie Weasley and go look after dragons in Romania. I can’t imagine she’d want to do anything else, especially if it means she could help beasts from poachers in that line of work as well.

Imelda gets to achieve her dreams of become a professional quidditch player. I reckon she’s a chaser, and she’s incredibly renowned for it, taking her team to the World Cup on several occasions.

Sebastian has a lot of options, being the favorite of the fandom I’ve seen a lot of ideas bounced around. A personal favorite of mine is that he becomes the DADA professor (though it’s in conflict with Dumbledore taking that position as well for a time). Either way, he definitely is involved in academia to some extent, later in life more like it. I could see him as a cursebreaker, something a little less sanctioned than an aurorship given his penchant for rule breaking.

Ominis needs some peace and quiet. And preferably far away from his family. I think he’s a good narrative mirror of his ancestor, Isolt Sayre. She fled the Gaunt family and ran to America (later being one of the founders of Ilvermorny) and it would be a nice justification as to why he wasn’t mentioned in later canon, as he fled his families clutches overseas and presumably took on a different surname.

Amit our little academic that he is, is going to be a professor no doubt. He’s not keen on action packed adventures, and like any true Ravenclaw, loves to share his never-ending thirst for knowledge. He’d definitely be a Hogwarts Professor, perhaps Astronomy or Charms (though he’d always have a fondness for the stars).

Garreth would pursue something more casual than the rest, no doubt following his passion for potions. I also think he’d be an excellent cook, not as a main profession but for his family! While he goofs around in class he makes no margin for error as an adult and is quite adept with a cauldron.

[deliciousangelfestival]

hi!! i jst wanted to say i loved ur bucky n steve as babies and was wondering if u could do another version where bucky/steve (seperate) where they’re (well one of them, either both or jst one is fine) are dating Y/N and theyre jst clinging onto her and cries/whines/throws a tantrum evertime she tries to leave, u can completely ignore this if u want

Thank you so much. I'm so happy you like the short story. Even though there's a lot mistakes. 😅

Here it goes. I hope you like it, @leiluvs . 😘

Check out Main Masterlist 👈

Drawing of baby Steve and Rogers : Drawing 1, Drawing 2, Drawing 3

Tiny Soldier

STEVE ROGERS

Captain America turned into a baby when he helped Dr. Strange.

The team was shocked, including Y/N. Steve's girlfriend. She was used to seeing Steve come with bruises. But she's not prepared when she sees Tony carrying her boyfriend.

Strange told Y/N the magic cast on Steve would last for a week, and then he would turn to normal.

That made Y/N relieved a bit. Then, her days with baby Steve started.

Baby Steve is gentle. He never makes a fuss. He only cries when he's hungry.

When she bathe and wash his hair, he is soft, fragrant, and very comfortable to hug. Everyone wants to hold him, but he only lets Y/N carry him.

Even though he's a baby, his eyes are only for Y/N. Whenever she goes, his eyes always follow her movement.

On the second day, he calls her "Y/N~." His child's voice makes him more cute since adult Steve always has his Captain voice when he talks but not towards Y/N.

Everyone was jealous. Tony and Natasha tried to persuade Steve to call their name. But baby Steve doesn't want to. He looks away, pretending not to hear them. Tony and Natasha felt annoyed a bit. They knew Steve could speak. But he only talks to Y/N.

When Y/N gave Steve milk, he handed half of his drink to her. "Y/N drink~." His small gesture made Y/N feel warm. Even though Steve became a baby, he wanted to share what he had.

Baby Steve will glare at anyone who stands closer to Y/N. He would slap an object near him or stomp his short leg.

Y/N thinks it's cute. But she misses her boyfriend in adult form.

When Steve turned back to adult, he felt dizzy. The first thing he did was hug Y/N. He felt safe and warm in her arms.

BUCKY BARNES

Poor Bucky was at the wrong time and location when Dr. Strange cast a magic spell. In a second, he became a baby.

Baby Bucky doesn't make a fuss, but he's active. He always sings, following the kid's channel. It was Tony's mistake who played the video.

Baby Bucky always hugs Y/N whenever he wants.

When someone tries to talk to Y/N, baby Bucky will immediately stand in front of her and open both of his arms. Like a barrier. With a frown face, he said, "My Y/N."

Baby Bucky is more possessive towards Y/N rather than adult Bucky.

When Bucky turns back into an adult, his first thought is to build a family with Y/N.

-end-

Author Note: Steve and Bucky readers must send a complaint letter to Dr. Strange. 🤣🤣🤣

Likes and Reblogs are appreciated. It helps me to get motivated. And if you can, could you leave a comment? I want to know what you think, and any feedback is welcome.💖

Check out Main Masterlist 👈

Drawing of baby Steve and Rogers : Drawing 1, Drawing 2, Drawing 3

[crazyunsexycool]

Henry feels weird about Santa. He can't wrap his head around the fact that people let in a random old man into the house just to eat cookies and give gifts?

He's like - why does he know where we stay? What if he steals something from our house? What if he's a creep who wants to stalk us ?🤔🤔

He's all protective and scared about it!

Who the hell is Santa?

A/N: I think of this as an au of the Christmas one shot I did for MLL last year…

You and Bucky had been explaining Christmas to the kids. The gifts, parties, decorations, giving back to others. The list went on and on. But it was at the mention of Santa Claus that Henry wrinkled his nose and furrowed his eyebrows in disapproval.

“So people just let him in?” He asked both curious and unsure.

“Yes, he comes down the chimney and leaves gifts for you.” Bucky explains.

“But isn’t that a security risk? And how does he get into houses that don’t have a chimney?”

“Well he uses magic.”

“Oh.” Henry says but doesn’t seem satisfied with the answer.

~~~~~~~~~~~

“But how does he even know which kid lives in which house?”

“He has a list, bubs.”

“How did he get the list?” Henry isn't liking what he's hearing. A strange man with the names of all the kids in the world? It gave him the creeps.

“Well kids send Santa a letter with all the things they want for Christmas.”

"Are you sure he doesn't work with the bad men?" He asks after a moment of silence.

Bucky look up from the files he had been working on, confused as to why he would ask that. "Bubs why would you think he works with the bad men?"

"Well he has way too much intel on people. He has access to every house. Couldn't he just like take the kids from home while they sleep?"

“Santa wouldn’t do that, bubs.” Bucky explain, trying to calm his nerves.

“I still don’t like him.” Henry mutters under his breath.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I don’t see why we have to bake Santa cookies.” Henry complained. “Why does he get a reward for committing a crime?”

It had been days of Henry complaining about Santa Claus. You and Bucky were so close to telling him the truth it hurt. But you didn’t want to ruin the magic of Christmas for him either. As you scooped up cookie dough and placed it on a baking sheet the idea came to you.

“Henry, uncle Tony did a background check on Santa. Do you really think we would let someone like that anywhere near you and your sister if we didn’t know everything about him?”

He turned to look at you, head tilted as he thought it through.

“Oh.” He murmurs. “I guess I didn’t think of that.”

“Your family make up the Avengers, we’ll always protect you.”

“I know.” Henry turns back to his own cookie dough.

The two of you work in silence and you do a little mental victory dance at having stopped the Santa questions.

“So is Santa Claus his real name? Or is like a superhero name? Like uncle Steve is Captain America and auntie Nat is black widow.”

“Santa’s real name is Kris Kringle.”

“Do you think uncle Tony would let me look at his file?”

“I won’t let you look at his file.” You stopped what you were doing and turned your full attention to him.

“Why not?”

“Because we are monitoring Santa. You don’t have to worry about it.”

“Fine.” Henry sighed. “Daddy said that kids can send him letters with what they want for Christmas, is that true?”

“Yes it is.” You smile. “Do you want me to help you write one?”

“Yeah.”

“What are you going to ask him for?”

“I’m going to ask him to not come into our house or I’m going to have to kick his butt.”

It took everything in you to not burst out laughing.

“That will get you on the naughty list.”

Henry shrugs. “I don’t care. He just better stay away from baby.”

You chuckle and shake your head. Maybe believing in Santa wasn’t Henry’s thing and that was ok. He was just being cautious. You couldn’t help but wonder what his reaction would be when he found out Santa wasn’t real.

[chaoticly-shy-dragon]

I'm back with more demigod dead boy detectives (parts one and two for those interested)! In short, Edwin is a son of Athena (born at the turn of the 20th century) who spent seventy years in the fields of punishment by accident - after he escaped it was 1989 and most of the gods had moved to America of all places.

And despite all that, St Hilarion was still functioning as a demigod heaven. Edwin is not happy. At all.

Charles on the other hand is having an interesting time all around. The backstory for him that I came up with starts from before he was born. The OG pjo au that I read had his father be Ares and yes?! I adore the Frank Zang of him?

But his mom and Ares didn't click in my mind until I realized that Ares is in an on-and-off relationship with Aphrodite - who is cutting and sharp and tough but also soft and ditsy and a bit shallow. His past lovers don't all need to be veterans or kickboxers. It was an eureka moment, to be honest.

Charles' mom (name still in the works) met Ares in a museum showcasing ancient pottery and jewelry - some of them Greek - most of which depicted old heroic tales or bore the scars of the years. They started talking completely by chance - Aphrodite had stood Ares up and he didn't feel like going back to what he was doing. He decided to check this collection out - to reminisce or to try and remember fallen friends. Or just to sulk. Either way, he was there.

Charles's future mom sees him and the conflicting aesthetic of his clothing and the display he was looking at makes her want to talk with him. They hit it off. He asks to see her again and the rest is history.

They are together for four months before she gets pregnant. As expected from a god, Ares disappears from her life with only a few words. Charles's mom is left alone with a baby, in a shitty apartment with no family in the country.

It sucks. Like a lot.

Then she meets Paul Richard Rowland.

(I'm sorry but I can't do Paul's name dirty in a pjo au, I just can't. Although the irony was amusing enough to make me consider it for a whole second.)

They hit it off even with the occasionally crying baby in the next room. Soon they are engaged to be married - and married soon afterward. Charles's last name is changed and would you look at that - a happy family.

Not.

Charles is a charming and athletic boy with a love for ska and a bit of a temper. His dad is a cunt and his mom is quiet. That's fine until it isn't.

In an argument, it gets out that Richard isn't Charles's actual father (he is 14 when that happens). Stuff gets progressively worse after that (both with Richard and with the monsters - Richard's whole "something is wrong with you" really drives in the "I am different" mindset you really don't want in an untrained demigod) until Charles' mom gets desperate and contacts the boarding school - Ares had assured her that it would always have a spot for Charles.

(The phone number is that of the school board of all the still functioning demigod establishments. Had Charles been a girl they would have referred the mom to one of the all-girls or mixed schools. It's a system run by descendants, wind spirits and satyrs.)

((It's not as efficient as say sending satyrs to schools, but they only have so many satyrs. They do the guardian routine! Honest!))

Fast forward and Charles has been to St Hil for almost a year and a half. He is a semi-full-year camper in the sense he went home once for one summer and then only for two to three days a year.

He gets along with his siblings and the cricket team. He is friendly and nice but 80s racism and classist bullshit exist - he can't be too vocal with his thoughts and opinions less he is ostracized by his peers, he has to play a role he only has half the script of. The demigod thing isn't always a blessing.

He is a deft hand with daggers and knives, he is skilled with a sword - but he would prefer to play cricket or go to concerts. No magical barrier means nightly patrols and the occasional monster attack.

Cue the death scene. It plays like canon but with weapons. He is chased into the freezing lake by his siblings and his former mates. (And Charles had been so excited about having siblings - but this - they - he couldn't call brothers.)

There aren't any naiads during the winter - or they are sleeping deep into it. No one intervenes. He manages to escape his pursuers by going deeper into the woods until he comes across an old shed.

Charles goes in.

(He didn't hear the sharp snap of twigs and branches in the other direction of the one he was going. He didn't notice the second pair of footsteps shadowing his own.)

((He does see the lantern.))

And they finally meet. Isn't it grand? (TBC)