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gayassbish · 11 months

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Genshin Siblings’ Reactions to Their Sister Having a Girlfriend!

Genre: Fluff, slight crack, (minor Angst in Jean and Barbara’s part)

Reader: Female*

Characters: Ayato & Thoma with Ayaka, Lyney & Freminet with Lynnett, Jean with Barbara, and Extra! Aether with Lumine

Ayato & Thoma-

On a typical evening when Ayato was finishing his daily quota and Thoma was doing his last rounds around the residence, Ayaka boldly enters in, hand in hand with you.

Ayato immediately takes notice, wondering ‘who tf is this bitc-‘ Kidding, he’s just like ‘who are you?’ in his head. And Thoma smirks, as if he already knows something.

The thing is, Ayaka decided to come out to Ayato when she would eventually have a girlfriend to introduce to him.

So when Ayaka asks if the four of you could have dinner together, with her new “friend,” Ayato instantly thinks something is up. His main suspicions are that you ran away from home with your raggedy looking- But he is worried you’re either homeless or in danger. Not really thinking Ayaka wants to introduce a friend, not even taking notice of the way Ayaka looks at you, and not noting your body language around her.

After introductions, the four of y’all are sat around the square table (Kotatsu). Thoma brings a cake with writing saying, ‘Yay! You’re Gay,’ in frosting but it slips pass Ayato as he doesn’t take his eyes off you two.

Once Thoma sits down, Ayaka clears her throat and breaks the big news. “Okay… big brother please don’t be mad. I know you wanted me to remain single for the rest of my life and be lonely till the ends of time-“

Ayato interrupts, not happy with the accusation that is thrown at him. “What? What nonsense why would I want you to be alone? They would just have to be a sensible guy-“

“Ugh! would you let me finish?” Ayaka rolls her eye and interrupts her big brother back. Thoma gives you a soft smile, mouthing the words ‘You better get used to this.’ “Anyways.. like I was saying. I found someone and they’re not a guy so-” Ayaka turns to look at you and Ayato’s jaw drops.

“You’re not homeless?” Ayato exclaims, shock and surprise written on his face. Evidently, the news for Ayaka and you together hasn’t hit him yet.

“Ayato!” Thoma and Ayaka yell simultaneously, while you laugh. Ayato almost looks embarrassed at his words, but you chime in before he can say anything else stupid.

“No, but I am your sisters girlfriend if you’re okay with that…” You look to Ayaka and give her hand a squeeze. She’s been pretty nervous about this whole meeting and stressing about how her overprotective brother would take it. Therefore she came out to Thoma before hand and asked if he would be willing to help break the news to him.

Ayaka and Thoma eagerly eat up Ayato’s reaction. “So.. you won’t be pregnant right?”Ayato nods to himself. And everyone but him deadpans. “Yea, I’m okay with this. Why wouldn’t I be?” He smiles at y’all and watches how his sister gleams.

Ayaka runs over the table to give her brother a hugeee hug. “Oh my god! Ugh I can’t believe I was scared to tell you!.” Ayato gives his sister a hug back and she sits back down.

“Wait.. Thoma?” Ayato looks to the blonde who’s already laughing. “Did you-?”

“Know? Yea… look at the cake I made buddy.” Thoma points to the clearly rainbow colored cake. “It’s a fruit cake. To celebrate this fruity day.” Thoma explains all excited and quite proud of his work.

“Well I see that now.. gosh.” Ayato mumbles and digs in. He slices different pieces for everyone.

The rest of dinner ends in laughter and more of Ayato’s dumb questions. Like “how do women fu-“Where did you guys meet,” and “Who confessed first,” as both Ayato and Thoma anxiously hear your story.

P.S. Ayato’s biggest fear is that Ayaka would get swept up by some dead beat guy and boom hed become an uncle one day, so he’s really happy you’re here to prevent that hypothetical nonsense.

Lyney & Freminet-

When Lynnett calls her brothers out for a cup of tea, they immediately think something must be wrong.

After all, Lynnett never plans meetings. She doesn’t have too since they all live in the same house.

So they conspire with one another for the reason for this meeting on the way to the cafe. And when they enter the building and see their shy Lynnett laughing and giggling, sat next to someone… Lyney’s first thought is, ‘who is this clone of Lynnett?’ And Freminent looks as if he’s lost his marbles. After all, everyone that Lynnett knows, the brothers already know… well almost everyone, until you stringed along.

They both know that their sister likes women. So you being a girl is no surprise. Mainly because Lynnett’s not the most discrete about her likings. If she likes something, they’ll find herself in her own world staring at the object of her desire or find herself obsessed with it, like tea. (Actually I think that’s just a bRiTisH thing.)

Anywho, neither of the siblings have EVER seen Lynnett like this and their eyes immediately trace to the cause of her giddy behavior. You.

Lyney hesitates a minute before asking,“Uhhh Lynnett?” Lynnett turns to look at her twin, who wears a nervous smile. Lyney swears he feels a shiver down his spine, still not fully convinced the girl, who looks like an identical copy of him, is his sister. “Who that?” He points to you, so shocked he forgot his manners.

“Lyney! Don’t be rude! This is Y/N.” She turns to you, “my girlfriend.” Freminent’s shock didn’t show on his face until now, and Lyney is still in confusion. “I called the two of you here to introduce you guys since Y/N will be around more often.” She takes a sip of her cup of tea, “But that was it, so you guys can leave now.” She smiles and was about to continue talking to you as Lyney and Freminent both immediately pull up a chair.

“Waiter, two cinnamon teas please!” Lyney gets the worker’s attentions and turns back to Lynnett, “Oh we are soo here to stay.” Freminent nods vigorously in agreement and Lynnett sighs.

“Exactly! You can’t just introduce her to us and not tells us anything!” Freminent exclaims, crossing his arms over his chest as he huffs.

Lynnett warned you that they might not take the news too well. It’s been the three of them for god knows how long, and she didn’t think they’d be ready to see her get onto the next phase in her life with you.

But you told her this meeting would be good for the both of you. She wouldn’t have to be so cautious with you around the city anymore and could finally get rid of the rope she used for you climb through her window and meet her. Plus it was about high time her siblings knew about the two of y’all together.

“They have a point Lynnett. How can they accept us if they barley know me?” You look at her and she frowns. She just didn’t want to put you through the trouble of her brothers eating at your head :(. “Please,” You ask her earnestly and she sighs.

“Fine. Out with it you two. What do you want to know?” Lynnett glares at them, communicating with her eyes to not ask anything rude. “You don’t have to answer anything you don’t want to.” She whispers to you and you squeeze her hand in reassurance.

“Oh me first!” Lynnett raises his hand to beat Freminent who slides back into his seat. “Why do you love my sister?” He analyzes you, preparing what he will say if you give him a bad answer.

“Well..” The brothers lean in to hear your answer. “What’s there not to love?” You say with a small chuckle. “But if I had to pick some of my favorite things about her it would have to be… how she looks at me… and how she tries to make sure I’m always okay in her own way. But I think the thing I love the most about her… is her independence.” You look to Lynnett who’s already blushing.

Freminent and Lyney look at eachother and it’s as if they come to an understanding that maybe you really are right for her. They usually aren’t so quick to trust someone at face value with some words, but they know. Lynnett has a wall around people and doesn’t let it down around just anyone. They trust that their sister is good at figuring out people’s good intentions from wrong, and if she’s opened her heart to you. Then they trust her. They trust her judgement of you.

“Well, I’ll admit thats not a bad answer.” Lyney rumbles, rubbing his neck, not so happy with his defeat.

“But I have one last question.” Freminent asks and the attention turns to boy who’s remained mostly quiet throughout this discussion. “It’s a really important one.” He looks to both Lyney and Lynnett, and it’s as if they both already know what he’s about to ask.

“Of course. Ask anything. I’m an open book.” You say with a calm smile.

Freminent takes a deep breath, “If you want to be a part of this family then… do you promise that no matter what you hear… or what you learn.. you’ll try to see things from our side?” All three of them look eagerly towards you.

Lynnett has told you seldom about her life outside of magic, but you know in your heart that no matter what, Lynnett will always be someone you cannot live without.

“We all have a story don’t we? …When you trust me enough to tell me yours, I know that no matter what I hear or see… I will wait for however long it takes to hear that story before coming to any sort of judgement.” You say softly, looking at them all and see the brothers tense figures lighten. When you turn back to Lynnett, her eyes tell you everything you need to know and how touched she is.

“Well shit.” Lyney says. “Welcome to the family.” He exclaims, and their drinks have arrived. The rest of the lunch continues with the exchanging of stories from embarrassing moments Lynnett’s had as a child to great epic moments of the high time in their careers. Though they don’t talk anymore about their past, you know when the time is right the occasion will come. :)

P.S. POV: You actually infiltrated their family to learn their magic tricks >:)

Jean-

When Jean patrols Mondstat’s forests for any lurking danger, she sees her sister sitting next to someone on dock of the lake. Their legs dangling and feet touching the water. She was about to walk up to say hi until she sees her sister kiss the person next to her.

Jean drops her sword and a loud thud startles both you and Barbara as the two of you turn around to look at the cause of the sound, only to find the shocked expression of the Acting Grand Master.

“Sister!” Barbara looks as if she’s seen a ghost and gets up to run to her.

“Wait Barbara your shoes-“ You get cut off by Jean running away and Barbra chasing after her.

You sigh, grabbing Barbara’s shoes and wearing yours, while following the shouting of the ladies. You even pick up Jean’s sword that she’s left on the floor.

You and Barbara haven’t been together for very long, but you’re both serious about each other. However, every time you would mention if it’s time to introduce each other to one another’s family, Barbara would avoid the topic. You later learned it was cause Barbara’s sister is extremely overprotective of her.

And it makes sense after all. Barbara has been known to have stalkers and crazy fans (IFHY ALBERT). You yourself know how naive Barbara can be at times and how she doesn’t really take the best care of herself. After all, most of the time you’re picking up after her.

You find the sisters deep into the forest. Barbara sitting down on a rock, her pale feet covered in mud and gunk. And Jean pacing back and forth with a hand messing up her pony tail.

“I can’t believe you went behind my back!” Jean shouts. “A girlfriend? Seriously Barbara? Do you think you’re mature enough to be in a relationship? Do you think that girl is trustworthy?” Jean turns to her sister.

“How dare you! Y/N is a great partner and we’re doing really good! And I’ve learned so much being with her than I have before!…Gosh I knew you were going to react like this so I hid it from you.” Barbara continues the shouting, but then starts to weep and Jean sighs. Jean hates it when her sister cries. And she hates it even more when she’s the one who makes her sister cry.

“Oh Barbara, please don’t cry-“ Jean kneels down, about to wipe her tears.

“Tell me, is it just a thing in your family to leave your stuff everywhere?” You interrupt, and the stark difference in their reactions almost makes you laugh.

Barbara exclaims your name and runs up to give you a hug, while Jean stands back up and crosses her arms over her chest. She wears a furrowed brow on her face to match the tense body language.

“You got mud all over you.” You tell Barbara softly and Barbara giggles. Once she lets go of the hug, you kneel down to clean her feet with a cloth. You put her shoes on her as well, and when you stand back up, you’re met with a distraught look on Jean’s face. “Here. Your sword.” When you walked to her to hand it back to her, Jean looks even more lost.

Jean, for the past years, has been the one taking care of her sister all the time. And though what you did just now might seem small, Jean didn’t even notice her sister was walking around barefoot. ‘What if Barbara got a thron stuck in her foot and her whole leg got infected?’ She beats herself up about not noticing sooner.

“Thank you,” Jean speaks very softly. Almost as if she’s trying to counteract for her shouting earlier.

“Don’t mention it,” You give her a genuine smile. You get where the older sister is coming from after all. “Now, how do we resolve this?” You look at both the sisters.

Barbara walks closer to where you and Jean stand. “Jean… I know I’m asking a lot from you to accept us given how bad I can be at judging people… but I swear. I swear on Barbatos that Y/N is a good person.” She looks at you and you smile. You can’t help yourself but to pat her head.

“Jean, I know how worried you must be. You’ve just seen your little sister being affectionate with some random stranger… but I promise you that this random stranger.. will take even better care of Barbara than you have over the years.” You make a challenge to yourself at Jean and she finally loosens up.

Jean exhales deeply. And shakes her head at how she jumped to conclusions about you.“I will take you up on that.” She looks at Barbara and then at you and noticed how she hasn’t really seen Barbara this happy and free in a while. Being stressed AF runs in the their family and she tells herself that maybe you’re good for her Barbara. And that maybe it’s time to let her sister experience the world for herself, without Jean’s watchful eye. “But.. I think we’re all do for a shower and a proper dinner after. I have many questions.” You and Barbara agree, sticky from the lake and the humid air as the three you guys walk back.

But this time instead of someone running away from another, someone shouting, and someone crying, you guys walk together. This marks the new beginning of getting to know each other and the rest of your lives.

P.S. Even if Jean ended up accidentally slaying your ass out of anger, C6 Barbara would’ve brought you back <3

A/N: I did a Barbara version where Jean introduces you as her girlfriend but I second guessed myself thinking that might be weird after I did the Jean version… (._.)

Aether-

Aether doesn’t believe his sister got a partner before he did. Questions his rizz. The end ;)

Kidding, he doesn’t even know his sister has a girlfriend because he hasn’t found her-

A/N: How do people write traveller?? What even is their personality, like are they pretty? Yes. Do they speak? No. What do you guys go off of?? [・_・?]

11/08/2023

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stayinlimbo · 6 months

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Returned Call

wc: 765, genre: exes to lovers(?), warnings: cursing in beginning, slightly unedited

note: although i feel this could be read as a stand-alone, here is the sequel to Missed Call you guys were asking for. i hope you enjoy ♡

Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system: You know. Lee Minho. Not available. Voicemail. Speak.

Fuck you, Lee Minho. No, seriously, fuck you.

Tell me why I was contacted by not one but three of your dancing buddies within the past twenty-four hours about how you’ve been moping around and trudging through your routines for the past week.

They were all essentially the same. You haven’t been the same since we broke up, is there any way we could reconnect, give you one more chance, blah blah blah.

You must be doing really bad if one of them was Hyunjin, of all people.

Two months too late, don’t you think?

As if any of this was my fault.

…

I was getting better before you called, you know?

I finally fixed my sleep schedule. I won’t lie, it took longer than I’d like to admit to break the habit of staying up late for you. At least I was already used to sleeping alone.

I reconnected with some old friends since I couldn’t talk to Jisung as much without being reminded of you. They can still read me like a book, even after all these years.

I even went on a date.

Granted, it was with myself, but I like to think it still counts.

…

You know what I realized on my “date?” And while out with my friends? And on the sleepless nights I spent staring up at my childhood bedroom’s ceiling?

I had forgotten what it felt like to be seen. To be appreciated. To be loved.

It seems like you’ve come to that conclusion as well, because you’re right. I deserved better. I deserve better. I may have ended our relationship, but I wasn’t the one who left first.

I remember our last kiss, paired with another one of your lies I foolishly kept believing in until I finished the movie night you promised you’d be home in time for. And I remember waking up on the couch with a sore neck to see your fatigued silhouette entering the front door, barely sparing me a glance as you dragged yourself towards the bedroom.

You didn’t even look sorry.

How could you, I guess, if you left everything back at the studio?

…

I used to admire your passion, Minho. I hate that I still do. You pour everything you have, everything you can possibly give, into what you love. So why couldn’t you do the same for us? For me?

You say you love me, but why does it feel like I lost something I'm not sure I ever had?

…

Where did we go wrong? What did I do wrong? I gave everything to you. I gave you my heart, my body, my entire being. I gave you everything until there was nothing left to give.

I never asked for anything outlandish. I think it��s reasonable to want to talk with your partner, to share your lives with one another. I think it’s reasonable to ask about when you’ll be home for our anniversary without being yelled at in front of your friends.

You want me to be proud of you? You want me to be happy about one of the very things that ripped us apart?

Yes, you’re selfish, but I’m no better.

…

Maybe this is my fault. After all, no one should feel obligated to love someone. I just never thought it’d apply to us.

…I wish I could hate you. I really do.

But all I see is your stupid face smiling at me when I close my eyes. I hear your laugh ringing in my ears when I remember the ways you said or did something ridiculous to make me feel better after a stressful day. I still feel the warmth of your body wrapped around mine when we did wake up next to each other, our legs entwined together to where it was impossible to escape. Not that I ever wanted to.

I want you to keep smiling at me. I want you to hold me. I want you to miss me. I want you to want me.

Because I still want you.

…

I want to give you a second chance, Minho. If things could be different this time, if we could be different. If we could share ourselves, wholeheartedly, as lovers, and not strangers.

I want to fall in love with you again, Lee Minho.

…

Call me back, when you get the chance. You can keep the shirts for now.

Just please, don’t make me regret this.

liked this work? want to let me know how i did? please like, comment, and/or reblog; they are greatly appreciated my asks are always open ♡

taglist: @linospuddin @linocz @spicyhyunn

ending note: I hope this didn't disappoint. I really tried my best to make it work with all the angst in here :D. I also tried incorporating parallels from Missed Call so hopefully that wasn't too annoying or anything <3

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itsangelll · 4 months

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𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧’𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭 𝐞𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮. ✰

A/n:hey cuties finally a fic out after a month 😭 this is a collab with @tomssexdoll I think we absolutely did amazing she’s a fabulous writer!! I hope you guys enjoy <33

parings: 2011 Mafia Bill x Freader

genre:angst to smut to fluff?

MDNI

warnings:A LOT of swearing p in v dom!bill sub!freader a bit of abuse please please do not read if your uncomfortable or sensitive with these topics!!

You and bill were forced to get married, the promise of your businesses improving if we did. You guys obviously agreed to this wanting to make as much money and more deals if you could.

You and bill had a lot of sex mainly during a middle of an argument, you were both very stubborn and immature, not willing to accept yours and his mistakes. You both had your good moments together not everything was terrible with him, sometimes he’d hold you and tell me how much he loved you, but his actions would be speak a lot more than words. Most nights Bill would be gone coming home at midnight or even later, lying to you constantly the question that always lingered in the back of your mind was that did he really love you or was he just using you?

You both had multiple fights a week some even becoming more abusive than usual, one got so bad he almost succeeded at throwing a chair at your head. You guys hated being like that towards each other but you couldn’t help it. It was way too stressful and overwhelming of being one of the top mafia couples in the world.

Bill came home late one night again saying goodbye to all his buddies as they sped off, he fiddled with the door before swinging it open and slamming it shut, You were in the lounge, it was pitch black having a cigarette lit your legs crossed, you felt like scaring him making him mad anything at all.

As he went to walk up the stairs you startled him with your voice, “And where the fuck where you exactly.” “Jesus Christ don’t scare me like that why are you in the dark for?” he grumbled before turning on a light noticing your red puffy eyes.

“Have..have you been crying?” he scoffed “As a matter of fact I have did you know how fucking worried I was about you what if you got shot?” You raised your voice after talking a long drag from your burning cigarette.

“Fuck sake like you’d care wether if I was dead or alive, can’t I have my fucking fun? I’ve been stuck here for a week with you for work” he went over to the liquor cabinet taking out his aged whiskey and sitting in his chair pouring the burnt umber drink into the glass.

“You’re a fucking asshole you know that right?” You glared at him your jaw slightly clenched “trust me I know” he lit a cigarette as well “you tell me everyday just as I tell you that you’re a whiny bitch all the time.” he gave you a sarcastic smile rolling his eyes and taking a huge sip from his whiskey.

“I can’t believe you just go out, stay out till 5 in the morning and I get no fucking call at all, you expect me to greet you with cookies and milk but yet you still think I’m a shit wife your the fucking, pathetic one here.” You shouted, “don’t yell at me you drive me up the wall here” Bill yelled back getting up from his chair and storming over to me, he grabbed your wrist with so much force pulling you up towering over you.

“oh you think you scare me? Nice try.” I snatched my wrist away, blowing the smoke in his face, Bill just stood there his gaze burning into mine a certain rage taking over him.

“You are so controlling can’t a grown man do what he wants when he wants?.” He huffed his chest heaving up and down in anger Bill was gonna snap at any moment. “I’m the controlling one here?! Aren’t you the one who gets mad at me for looking in another guys direction, you beat up any man I talk to refuse to let me go out when I’m apparently wearing something too “short” but yes bill I’m the controlling one you fucking hypocrite.” You scoffed shaking your head.

“At least I have good reasons, you’re the one getting upset over me being out late suck it up doll.” he spat his words cruel, “You just don’t get it do you? It’s not the fact that you’re out late I don’t give a shit do what you want, It’s the fact that I never got told where you are, I’m sitting here late at night wondering where you are and if I should call the police or not, I’m really fucking sorry for worrying about you is that so bad?” Your voice still raised anger coursing through your veins.

“You make me so fucking mad..” he grunted walking closer towards you narrowing his eyes at you. “Cry me a river,you’re a grown man aren’t you? Learn how to deal with your emotions properly.” You rolled your eyes, Bill grabbed your hair pulling you close “don’t fucking speak to me that way!!” he yelled inches away from your face.

You pushed him off slapping him harshly across the face leaving a bright red hand mark. “Don’t you ever fucking touch me like that” you screamed, “You know what I could kill you right now.” He yelled back rage in his voice.

“Shoot me then fucking shoot me.” I yelled my voice starting to strain. you and bill just stood there silent for a second both of your chests heaving up and down.

Without another word bill grabbed you by your waist and kissed you passionately his tongue entering your mouth searching for dominance, “Your so fucking whiny aren’t you” he muttered between kisses, his hand roughly slapping your ass you couldn’t help but moan. He pulled away from the kiss a string of salvia parting from your mouth, Grabbing your hand and taking you upstairs he had a pretty strong grip you almost couldn’t keep up.

When you guys made it to your room he threw you on the bed towering over you his dark brown orbs filled with such lust, wasting no time he ripped off your shirt then your jeans leaving you in nothing but your black lace set of lingerie. Bill groaned at the sight a large tent forming in his pants, “You’re so pretty f’me Schatzi” he said in a raspy voice, your breath hitched your core getting even more wet. Even though sometimes Bill was a complete prick you couldn’t help the affect he had on you.

He unclasped your bra and ripped off your underwear, your nipples and your wet cunt getting exposed to the cool air a shiver went down your spine running his fingers over your breasts. You whined “Don’t be a tease Billy this isn’t fair” he smirked and lifted your chin up “Does my doll want me fuck her dumb hm? Is that what you want?” His knee was rubbing your clit non stop, you could burst any second nodding desperately Bill without any hesitation removed his belt in one swift move, his jeans and boxers pool at his ankles letting his cock spring free.

Even though how many time you guys have fucked you could never get over how big he was. Bill swiped a finger at your folds his finger now coated with your arousal “I haven’t even done anything yet and your already wet for me doll you’re just that desperate aren’t you?” You couldn’t answer, He snickered without another warning he slammed into you then pulling back out fully before filling you up once again. You moaned loudly the way his cock fit your pussy was amazing, His hands made their way down to your waist gripping tightly bound to leave marks tomorrow. “Fuck Jesus you feel s’good around my cock love gonna fill this slutty hole with my cum” he groaned out.

Bill moved at a rapid pace his tip kissing your cervix perfectly moans were spilling out of you uncontrollably, you were in pure ecstasy, your walls clenched around him every time he hit that gummy spot the knot in your stomach growing tighter with each passing second “Mm Bill fuck fuck I’m close!” you breathed out he moved his hand down to your clit rubbing his thumb in fast circles, “Cum on this cock for me doll” he whispered you were about to break.

Those words were all you needed to hear, your legs shaking bringing you over the brink you screamed out his name cumming all over his cock, “Fuck baby that’s it” Bill let out a low growl before shooting his cum inside you thank god you were on the pill. He collapsed on top of you, lifting his head up and pressing a kiss to your temple, “You okay my sweet girl? Did I go to rough?” he said in worry, you smiled “Yes billy I’m okay it was amazing” you replied.

“I’m sorry about the fight earlier Liebe you just mean to much to me and I can’t lose you ever I don’t know what I’d do” you were in awe “Billy you aren’t ever going to lose me I promise you that” you took his hand in yours and kissed him passionately you really did love him.

A/n:I hope you guys enjoyed! Me and @tomssexdoll worked really really hard on this, she did an amazing job. but I’m glad I’m writing again, I’m gonna try and write more mwah bye cuties <33

Taglist:

@itsmealaiah

@noellethinks

@jadedchar

@madzandmore

@memzyyy

@tomssexdoll

#tokio hotel #tom kaulitz #tokio hotel x reader #billkaulitz #georg listing #gustav schäfer #bill kaulitz smut

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olsenmyolsen · 9 months

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This Is Me Trying - One - (A Y/N Parker Spider-Woman X Kate Bishop Story)

masterlist

Summary: The Winter semester is challenging as you fall behind on exams and essays all while an old threat emerges.

Word Count: 3.3K

Content: College stress, cutie Kate Bishop

You, Y/N Parker, loved Christmas time.

You loved how it changed the city from a smelly concrete jungle into a smelly concrete jungle but with snow!

Lights went up with trees covered in decorations. Lattes got better, and so did the cookies.

The air got colder, and sometimes the people got warmer. Whether it was buying things for strangers or for a lifelong friend. Random acts of kindness increased, but on the flip side, so did the rate of crime.

Plus, swinging in the cold was awful, but with some insulation in the suit, it helped.

All of this to say you still loved this time of the year.

"You know, since you love it so much, how about you let me go? You know, like you said, kindness of strangers and all that!"

You looked at the guy webbed to a pole who just mugged a woman coming home from work and tilted your head.

"You know what you're right. Tis the season!" The man nodded as you took a few steps closer. "However, on second thought!" The man's eyes widened before you webbed his mouth shut.

"Marv, how many times are we gonna do this, buddy?" You patted the man's head as the sirens were approaching.

"Happy Holidays!" You yelled as you swung up to the nearby rooftop, looking for the woman whose purse was in your hand.

As you stay perched on the corner, your phone starts to ring. It was Peter—your best friend and brother. You debated whether to answer it or not, but eventually, you gave in and pressed the side of your mask.

"Hey man, what's up?"

"Not much... I know it's late, but I- I was just wondering if you started on Dr. Ohnn's paper yet? I'm completely lost. H-He knows we're sophomores, right?!"

You chuckled and sighed.

You haven't started on the paper yet.

"Sorry, Pete. I've been busy..." You heard Peter let out a disappointed sigh.

"Y/N... you're out, aren't you?" You felt bad. For the last couple of weeks, Peters has been asking you to take it easy with your after-school duties due to the number of exams these previous few weeks have had and, as mentioned before, the crime rate, but you haven't. If anything, you tacked on more. "Y/N, you know how dangerous I still think this is."

You rolled your eyes. "Yes, Peter, I know, but-" Before you could finish, you saw a person jump from one rooftop to another two blocks down from you. "Hey Pete, I gotta go..."

"Wait Y/N... Y/N!"

The line went dead as you tapped the side of your mask and took off, swinging purse in hand to the stranger on the rooftop.

As you front-flipped from your webbed, you laughed. "Well, if it isn't the purple bird!" You said when you got up from your landing pose, scaring the crap out of the archer. He jumped and drew his bow on you before realizing who it was.

With an exaggerated groan, he withdrew his weapon.

"What do you want, Spider!?" He sounded annoyed. You put your hands over your heart. Purse still in hand. "Ouch! I just wanted to check up on the man who destroyed 30 Rock last year."

Clint Barton rolled his eyes.

"It was a tree and a skating rink. Get over it." You raised your hand and mocked the archer as you stepped onto the roof's ledge.

"Where's the youngster?" You asked switching topics. Clint raised an eyebrow. "What are you spying on me now?" You put your hands up. "As if! Just curious. Making conversation. It's not my fault you two happen to fall into my patrol area."

Clint looked at you. "Your patrol area?" You nodded. "It's called New York. Ever heard of it?" Clint rolled his eyes again. "You can be a pain in the ass sometimes, you know that."

"I've been told."

"By friends?" You laughed. "No by enemies. Wait..? Why did you hear something?"

Clint cracked a smile. "Maybe." He hadn't, but he enjoyed this back-and-forth you two played. Like his protege, it was nice to have someone around who reminded him of the heroes of the past. People that brought hope for the future.

"So is that purse yours or?" Clint looked up from his binoculars at you. "No. It's not my color." When Clint didn't laugh, you continued. "Lady got mugged, and I don't know where to find her."

Clint looked from the purse to you and did it two more times. "What?" You asked when no words were spoken. Clint huffed. "You have her purse. It probably has her ID." You tilted your head before your eyes got wide. "Oh! Her address!"

Clint nodded yes and grumbled about you before looking into his binoculars again.

"Thanks, bird man!" You said as you looked at the address. It wasn't far. "Same time tomorrow?" You asked as you twhiped away.

Clint sent you a thumbs-up even though he wasn't paying attention. But you didn't know that. You saw a thumbs up and smiled.

You were getting through to the old man.

As you twhiped to the woman's place to return her purse, a bright-eyed Kate Bishop saw you.

"It's the Spider!" She very awkwardly whispered to no one else before running to the building; she had no idea you had just left from.

And when she got to the top: "Clint!" She shouted, making the archer jump before realizing who it was. "What!?" He said, looking at her as she smiled with excitement. "The spider! I just saw her!" He nodded like a dad would. "And?" He said. "And! And! And isn't that cool!" Clint shrugged. "I guess. She was here. She actually asked about you." Clint held in a smile.

It was a not-so-secret that Kate had a slight crush/admiration for the web-slinging hero.

"And!?" Kate took the binoculars from Clint and awaited his answer. "And... that was it. Nothing else. She joked around. I rolled my eyes. That was it."

Kate was going to press for my information, but Clint was useless when it came to details so mundane.

"Ugh. Fine. Here." Kate tried to hand the binoculars back, but Clint shook his head. "Look and tell me what you see." Kate looked through them and into the window of a known wheelman. "Tracksuits." She said, making Clint nod.

"See the guy with the awful chops?" Kate shifted her focus to a guy with bad facial hair. "Yeah."

"Look past him on the wall." Kate did just that and smiled. "I thought people only drew on blueprints in the movies?!"

"Our guys must watch a lot of movies," Clint said as he chuckled.

Kate put the binoculars down and looked at Clint. "After last year, do you still think Kingpin and these guys are connected? I mean..." Kate made a gesture that said, "really, these guys??" while pointing in the direction of the Tracksuits.

Clint shrugged. "I think it's best to believe they're connected than to not. Plus.. drugs and money still need to be run for guys like Kingpin. Any disposable person that's easy to pay is like Christmas to these guys."

Kate thought about it and nodded as she looked through the binoculars again. "Remember when we destroyed 30 rock."

Clint groans and closes his eyes. "It was a tree and an ice rink. Not the whole city!"

While Kate was busy trying to figure out what annoyed Clint and what Kingpin was planning next, you were busy climbing into your dorm through the window.

You tore your mask off as your feet landed on the floor. You ran your covered hand through your freshly shortened hair and took a deep breath before frowning. You sniffed the air before lifting your suit close to your nose. "Ah, man.."

The city really got to it tonight.

You tossed your mask into the hamper in your closet as you started wrangling out of your suit. You've been meaning to make adjustments to your suit since your arm muscle has only grown, but you hadn't, which left it a bit tight to get out of sometimes.

Lucky for you, you never had people drop by unannounced, so you could always take your time-

"Y/N is that you- OH MY GOD!"

You turned towards the voice of your brother as the top half of your suit fell, showing off you in your black sports bra and toned abdomen.

"Peter!" You yelled as he threw his hands over his eyes. "I didn't know. I'm sorry!" He shouted as he went to run out the door but hit your wall instead, causing him to fall to the floor, knocked out.

An hour later, as you moved your clothes from the wash to the dryer, Peter woke up. And after scolding him about not knocking, you and him got to work on Dr. Ohnn's paper.

But with your exhausted brain and body. Plus Peter's... mild concussion, you two didn't get far. So, just as you were about to suggest calling it for the night, your roommate came home.

Where she was or who she was with was always a mystery to you.

"Hey, losers!" Michelle-Jones, aka MJ, greeted you and Peter as she ran to grab the TV remote sitting on the table. She clicked it on and found the local news channel. "MJ, what are you-" She held up a finger and shushed your brother. "Look!" She pointed to the screen as a reporter was standing in front of a run-down apartment building that was on fire. "It's the fifth one this month!" MJ stated. "Everything thinks I'm crazy, but I know insurance fraud when I see it."

You and Peter weren't sure how to continue.

"Okay..." You started. "What's your point?" You questioned, hoping your roommate and friend was going somewhere with this. "Obviously, someone is doing something very illegal."

"Okay..." Peter said. "What can we do about it?"

"We can't do anything about it. But someone here can." MJ started motioning her head towards you, making you sigh. "MJ. I've told you multiple times. The pictures were a summer thing. I don't take their pictures anymore!" MJ rolled her eyes. Clearly not believing you. "Whatever you say..." She narrowed her eyes at you. "Spider!"

Before you could argue back, MJ got up and went to the fridge before taking a box of pizza to her room. "I'm gonna crash. Night."

"I brought that pizza..." Peter quietly said as you collapsed onto the couch. "You were gonna give it to her anyways." You turn your head to Peter. "Was not!" He defends, but you see through him. "You've had a crush on her for the last year, so please let's be honest here."

Peter closed his mouth and then said: "You're the one not being honest with her."

"Dude."

"Sorry," Peter mumbled. "It's just she's going to find out on her own if you don't tell her." He whispered. You nodded. "I know. I know. But you and I both know that the fewer people that know, the less I have to worry about. The less people get hurt."

Peter wore a sad smile on his face. "You're right. I.. I just hate lying to her."

You looked at Peter as he brought his knees close to his chest on the other end of the couch. "I'm sorry, Pete." He nodded. He knew it was easier for you to do this if the less people knew about your other life, but he wasn't sure how much longer he could lie to MJ.

The following morning, after Peter returned to his dorm, you woke up late.

Apparently, in your sleepy daze, you hit 730 into your calculator app and not your alarm clock application. On top of that, you forgot to charge your phone, so as you panicked to get ready for the day, you quickly put in the cable to charge.

You grabbed your closest pair of jeans and threw on your school sweater, all while grabbing the textbooks scattered on your desk.

You ran into the kitchen and grabbed your last pair of pop tarts before heading to the door and slipping on your vans. You zipped up your bag and bolted out the door.

However, you immediately reentered your dorm, ran into your room, snatching your glasses and phone, now on 16%.

The lecture hall was full by the time you entered. The booming of the door attracted the attention of everyone.

Your brother included. Your eyes found his, and he gave you a weak smile as you sat at the first seat you could find.

When you pulled out your textbook and looked up, you saw Dr. Connors sigh before he continued speaking. "As I was saying. Yes, just because the holidays are upon us doesn't mean we won't have our test on Friday. I want something fun to grade over the break, people." He gave an awkward chuckle that few students, including you, gave back. "Oh, and don't forget. Your papers on physics are still due by the end of the school year. If you've forgotten... well, there's a reason I'm tenured, and this class lasts all year." He smiled and proceeded to dismiss everybody.

Everybody but you.

"Y/N Parker. A moment."

You knew it was coming, but you kept your head up high. You look to Peter, and he nods. He'd see you after class.

"Dr. Connors, look, I'm sorry about being late-"

"Late?" He cut you off. "You missed the whole dang class." You sighed and adjusted the bag around your shoulder. "Look..." Dr. Connors started. "You're a bright student. I've seen it firsthand, but lately... it's like you're not even here. Your grades have been steadily declining. You always appear exhausted."

You nodded. "I'm trying. I wanna be here!"

"Then be here." He said before he sighed. "You still haven't told me what your physics paper is on."

You perked up at that. "I plan on doing it about fusion and Dr. Otto Octavius."

Dr. Connors sighs. "Well, planning is not a major at this university." He walks past you and goes to the giant board in the middle of the room. He then stops. "Octavius is a friend of mine. Better do your research, Parker." You nod. "I'd really hate to see you fail."

"I don't want to, sir." You say, making Connors look at you with a sad smile on his face. "I can pass along your information to Octavius. Whether he contacts you or not is up to him. After that..." He looks at you. "It's up to you, Parker."

When you exited the lecture hall, you found Peter talking to your mutual friend Ned. The closer you got, the more you saw Peter panic and tell Ned to "shut up."

"What's going on?" Peter shook his head as if nothing was wrong. You looked to Ned, who sheepishly looked away. "Ned." You drug his name out.

Ned took one look at you and broke. "I think I might know about the fires around the city!" He smiled and looked excited. It paid to have Ned be the guy in the chair.

You looked at Peter. "You didn't want him to tell me?" Peter sighed. "Y/N, you have so much going on already we don't need you." He gestures with his hand as if he was shooting a web. "Right now. Besides, you haven't even started on your essay, and you just got in trouble with Connors!"

Before you could defend your lack of action, you get interrupted.

"Hey guys!"

Immediately, your stress melted away as you looked down at Kate Bishop. Captain of the Archery Team. Your friend and study partner.

Oh, and your crush.

Katherine Elizabeth Bishop.

"Hey Kate!" You said a little too excitedly, something that everyone caught on to. Thankfully, they chose not to make a big deal out of it. "Hey, Y/N." She looked at you and smiled.

There goes the butterflies.

"So what are you three amigos talking about?" She bounced on her heels as she looked away from you and to the other two. "Oh, nothing!" Peter said. "I don't think you're allowed to say that?" Ned added with a confused face.

"Doesn't sound like nothing," Kate said, making Peter glance at you. "Sounds like Y/N is getting in trouble with Connors." She replied as she turned to you with a teasing smile. "Let me guess..." She made a thinking face. "Too busy studying for our History test?"

History test!! Oh crap, that is Friday!

"Okay, based on the look I just gained, you forgot." You nodded. Kate made a hmm noise but kept her head towards you as she thought.

"Shit," Ned spoke up. "Peter, we gotta go, or we'll be late!" Peter looked at his watch and came to the same conclusion. "Gotta go! See you, Y/N! Bye, Kate!" Peter and Ned took off running down the hall and out the doors before they sprinted across the courtyard.

"What class do they have?" Kate asked.

"Robotics."

"Sounds about right." She said. "We should probably get going." Kate smiled and gestured her head in the general direction of your History class with Kate. "Don't worry about the test," Kate said as you two walked side by side. "You always do just fine." You shrugged her compliment off.

Kate noticed. "But I was thinking if you want..." You looked at Kate and noticed her fingers interlocking with one another. "Maybe you could come to my dorm to study some more. Besides, I still need help on the laws and how they changed once the Sokovian Accords were ratified."

You and Kate had always hung out in mutual gatherings and settings. You two were good friends, but you had never been to her dorm.

On top of that. Alone.

You suddenly felt very warm and wary of your every move.

"That sounds great!" You managed to say. "When were you thinking?"

Kate thought. If it were up to her, you'd come over tonight, but Kate wasn't sure what her roommate Cassie was doing. Plus, she and Clint had a hot new lead to follow up on. "Ummm, is it cool if I text you?"

You nodded. "Sounds great." You smiled widely and pushed the door to your History class open. Letting Kate walk in first. You and Kate walked to your seats and sat beside one another.

"Shit." You heard Kate mumble when she opened her bag. "You okay?" You asked. "Uh yeah.." She bit her lip. A habit you noticed that she only got when she was embarrassed. "What's wrong?" You asked when you tore your eyes away from her chewed-on pink lips.

Kate sighed when her lips parted. "I forgot my textbook. I thought I packed after Clint- Clint-on Clinton and I got back from Archery, but I guess I didn't." Kate didn't look your way.

She was now warm and aware of every move she made.

"Hey, I surprisingly remembered mine." You pulled yours out. "We can share." You moved it in between the two of you. "Really?" She charmingly lifted her eyebrows. "Really." You said.

Kate let out a little cheer and wrapped an arm around you. "You're a lifesaver!"

If only she knew.

Kate didn't remove her arm from around you as quick as she usually would have; instead, you could feel her hand slide up your muscles to your shoulder.

Kate had been noticing your muscle growth as of late but didn't know where it came from...

Eventually, Kate removed her touch from you.

Yet you still felt her.

"It's no big deal." You said about sharing the textbook. But you and Kate both knew that based on your actions recently, you remembering to bring your book or not falling asleep in class was a miracle.

This was Kate's first time forgetting a book, and she could sense Clint's disappointed sigh.

Kate smiled as she watched your fingers turn the corners of the page in the textbook. Her eyes lifted to your fingers, to your sweater, and up to your face. She watched your side profile as you silently read a paragraph to yourself. She only stopped when you looked her way and hid a smile when you pushed up your glasses. "What's up?" You quietly asked.

"Do you want to come to my archery practice tomorrow?" Kate whispered back.

Kate wasn't sure what you had going on in your life. You and her were close but not close, like with Peter, Ned, and MJ. So she never pushed.

Plus, she liked you and didn't want to ruin what you two might have.

But when you said, "Yeah! That sounds awesome!" Like a dork, Kate smiled.

dividers by @/benkeibear

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sweetestcaptainhughes · 6 days

Note

Can you do thirty one with trevor zegras ?

I don't think this is what you were expecting. Honestly I'm shocked too how this drabble turned out but I think it's cute.

Drabble Challenge. Drabble Masterlist.

"Eat your lunch and you wouldn't be hungry."

Trevor was truly it for you, ever since you met him you knew he was the one for you. But that doesn't mean that sometimes he doesn't annoy the absolute shit out of you with his constant yapping especially when he states the obvious.

Like today you guys went to hike the Hollywood sign, something that you guys do all the time during the season. But this was your first hike back in L.A after being on the east coast all summer, and the evaluation is very different in California than New York. The entire hike all he did was complain about the hill.

"oh my god I thought I was ready for the season fuck."

"baby how much longer?" He would ask every 3 minutes as if he wasn't the one who showed you this trail when you started dating two years ago.

"oop baby you see the dog, he looks like Ava's new puppy."

"babe, I need water. I'm gonna die."

"why is it so fucking hot."

Somehow through the entire hike and even when it was over you held all your smart remarks back from Trevor. Ultimately you knew that this was just how he was, but sometimes for whatever reason it just got under your skin the amount that boy talked. Maybe it just how your brain worked but sometimes you needed it to be quiet so you could stop feeling so overstimulated. You know that if you just told Trevor you were feeling overstimulated on the hike or in the car it wouldn't of gotten to the point of you yelling at him.

But after he came out of the shower, you had just finished setting the table for an early lunch. Of course all Trevor seemed to do was sit down and barely touch his food. He just sat there talking about the upcoming season, missing his friends that got traded this past summer, and rumors he heard about the new kid they got Beckett?

So when he made the comment about how hungry he felt after you were almost done you lost it on him. "Well if you would eat your lunch. You wouldn't be so hungry Trevor!" you screamed at him from across the table. He looked at you shocked, his mouth slightly open. Immidately feeling guilty for yelling. But before you could apologize Trevor got up with his plate of food.

"I'm gonna eat in family room." he softly confesses leaving the kitchen eat area. All you do is sigh after a few minutes you go to the family room to see Trevor had finished his whole lunch and was watching something on T.V.

Walking in front of his line of sight head titled slightly down still in embarrassment you admit "I'm sorry Trev, I just been a little off all day."

He opens his arms wide, still sitting up on the coach a silent invitation for you to come sit with him. Wasting no time you quickly cross the room and flap down into his arms, your body already feeling more relaxed than a few moments ago. He speaks in a soft tone almost like he doesn't want anyone else to hear what he's about to say despite being in your guys apartment alone. "It's okay baby, but I thought I told you before when you get overwhelmed you need to tell me."

Playing with his hands you nod at his words. "You did but I feel like I don't give you what you need if I tell you I need you to stop talking. You yapping constantly is such a big part of your personality I feel guilty sometimes telling you to shut up with how easily I get overstimulated."

Trevor grabs your chin gently with his index finger forcing you to looks at him. "No none of that okay. You give me everything I need and more. You honestly spoil me with how you do all the cooking and cleaning and you even give my family updates when I'm too stressed during the height of my season. Fuck Y/N you go to all my home games even if your rushing there form work and have to change in the arena. You do more than some of my buddies on the teams girls that don't even work." chuckling to himself as even he realizes he's going on a tangant which is the opposite of what he wanted to do. But you didn't care a smile on your face at all the compliments he was giving you.

"Anyway.." he begins again "you're not forcing me to hide part of my personality once a month when you need a small break. Okay?" He waits for you to aknowledge his words before he continues. "If anything you are giving me the priveldge of taking care of you. Which by the way you never let me do cause your so independent." He bends down stealing a peck from you as you protest.

"hey. You said you you love how independent I am. Do you want me to pretend not to be? " you jokingly agrue back, the tension in the air from earlier completely gone.

"Oh I do. I wouldn't change anything about you. You Miss. Y/N Y/L/N are perfect to me." he softly lets out as he bends his neck down again pulling you into a much deeper kiss.

#trevor zegras fic #trevor zegras x reader #trevor zegras imagine #trevor zegras #trevor zegras fluff #trevor zegras angst #trevor zegras fanfiction #trevor zegras x y/n #drabble challenge #nhl fanfiction #nhl fic #schwritingstz11

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boots-with-the-fur-club · 6 months

Text

Another angst prompt, someone stop me from getting random ideas from crazy places.

17. Accident.

@that-0n3-shr00mi3-guy

@daboyau

Raph sits up in a panic. He puts his head in his hands to try to get a grip back on reality. The nightmares have mostly subsided, but every so often he gets one that leaves him unable to sleep for the rest of the night. Whenever this happens, he leaves his bed and goes to make sure the contents of the dream didn’t happen.

First, he goes to Mikey’s train car. Raph opens the door and sees him curled up in his hammock. A blanket is hanging off the side. He picks it up and wraps it around him. Mikey snuggles into it, making Raph smile before he leaves and shuts the door behind him.

Donnie is next. Raph makes doubly sure he’s not passed out somewhere in his lab before checking his room. He’s happily surprised to see him actually there for once. Raph closes the doors once and again and goes to Leo’s train car next.

His heart nearly stops at seeing the doors already open and the bed being empty.

He tears apart the room as if he’d find Leo under Jupiter Jim comics or a basketball. His brother shouldn’t be up about. The injuries he got are still healing. Raph’s brain finally starts working and he races off to check the other parts of their home.

Raph eventually gets to the living room where he sees glowing blue. Ever since that day, the one where he thought he allowed his brother to end his own life, he hasn’t been able to see it the same.

He’s unable to think about anything else when he sees the back of Leo’s arm and body partially sticking out. Raph grabs his wrist and pulls him back. The anxiety and stress he’s feeling gets to him.

“What are you’re doing!? Using portals again when you’re not even supposed to be out of bed!? Did you even think at all before you-!?” Something suddenly slams into his face.

He stumbles back, still not letting go of Leo. Raph uses his other hand to try to wipe it off. There’s….icing on it? Something crumbly….cake?

Raph looks back at Leo and immediately let’s go this time. His brother is trembling, badly. He’s clearly fighting back tears which means that Raph has messed up catastrophically. Leo only ever cries for two reasons, dramatic effect, and when he’s so upset he can’t control it.

Leo drops to his knees, eyes focused on the dropped pieces of food on the ground. The tears start coming. Raph’s heart shatters into a million pieces. Leo looks so fragile. It feels like he popped an orphan’s balloon then kicked his puppy for good measure.

Raph shakes off the rest of the cake on his face and kneels down.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay! I can get you another cake! A better cake! You want a blue one? One shaped like a basketball!?” He tries to reach out, only for Leo to flinch.

Raph’s world almost blurts when he realizes what might be going on. He grabbed him and yelled so suddenly, did he….did he think he was kraangified again?

Or maybe he could just never fully trust him again.

He’d always be scared

Raph didn’t mean to be so rough. It was an accident. He was just so scared and worried. He didn’t want to lose Leo again. Maybe he already did in a way, though.

Leo suddenly starts crying a lot harder.

“I-I’m sorry! I just….I just wanted to get you that cake…..it wasn’t for me….!”

Raph frowns deeply. He didn’t know he could feel so bad so very quickly. It’s painful.

“Why….were you getting me cake?”

Leo’s tears drench his gloves as he tries to wipe them with his fists.

“Your birthday was two weeks ago and nobody remembered because you were busy taking care of me! You didn’t even remember! It was your birthday!”

Raph blinks in surprise.

Everything has been so busy for so long he could hardly tell what day of the week it is, let alone the date.

“….Leo, buddy-“

“And now I can’t even get grabbed without it feeling like I’m going to die because I got smashed into a wall! I hurt you! I saw it in your eyes! You think I’m afraid of you when I’m just a coward!”

“Leo, you went through a lot, this isn’t your fault-“

“You only roughhouse with me! It was our thing! You already feel like I’m going to break! And now you’re going to be scared that I hate you! Blame you! When am I going to stop taking things from you!?” He sobs.

Raph takes the absolute most care he can to be as gentle as possible as he pulls Leo into a close hug.

“You don’t. You don’t take anything. You give me so much. You’re here. That’s all I need. I’d trade every birthday, all the wrestling, even my bears to have ya. That’s a promise.”

Leo clings to him and keeps sobbing until he passes out in Raph’s arms. Raph lifts him up, placing his head on his shoulder. He takes him with him back to his room and sits on the bed.

He knew that he wouldn’t be able to sleep. He knows that things wouldn’t magically be better in the morning. He knows that his legs will cramp up and that he won’t be able to move for a long time.

It doesn’t matter.

At all.

Leo’s there.

That’s more than enough.

#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #2018 tmnt #rise of the tmnt #tw angst #rottmnt angst #rise fanfiction

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in1-nutshell · 6 months

Note

Hello again! another tfa Elita One's twin sister w/ Sg Blackarachnia with a slice of life?

Maybe where Elita One's twin took a day off, like having peaceful time away from work or war related, whether shes's alone or shes accompanied by someone or group (maybe with sari, Megatron, or others)

Add idea:

She's been followed by cons/bots (probably Meg and/or Op/Elita/Sentinel), Elita One's twin Didn't know about it

Buddy really does need a break from all of this.

Hope you enjoy!

Elita One's twin sister and Optimus Prime: slice of life

SFW, Platonic, Romance, Cybertronain (techno organic)reader

TFA

It had been an extremely stressful week for both sides.

Optimus had been called over and over by his team, the city, and the Decepticons skirmishes.

The Prime was running on fumes and knew it was only a matter of time before he would collapse. He did try and get his team to lay off a bit, but he knew in the end he would have to take care of it as leader.

Buddy was starting to get frustrated and impatient with how this week had been turning out.

The number of repairs, renovations, and overall, back up was testing her.

Not even Megatron’s sweet words did anything for her.

Then one evening she did snap.

She was so done with everything.

She even threw her screwdriver through the wall nearly impaling Blitzwings wing to the wall. Marching straight into the main room and yelled catching everyone’s attention.

Buddy venting heavy looking at everyone in the optic.

“Now that I have your attention. I will be taking all tomorrow for myself. There will be no medic available until tomorrow is done. If you have an injury, there are other mechs around with medical experience. Unless you are currently offlining, You. Will. Not. Disturb. Me.”--Buddy

Megatron steps to her side.

“Are you sure that is wise—”--Megatron

Buddy turning her helm sharply to her significant other borderline glaring at him.

As if daring him to say the wrong words.

Megatron felt a bit uneasy as he chose his words.

“I mean that the last time you went out, you had been captured. I do not think I need to remind you of that.”--Megatron

There are some murmurs of agreement around.

Buddy gives him a pointed glare before morphing into a sickening sweet face.

“You are right Megatron. Maybe I should take someone with me.”--Buddy

Megatron nods in agreement.

“I wonder if Optimus is available?”—Buddy

All the Decepticon’s look at her in disbelief.

“…what?”--Megatron

“You can’t be serious?”--Starscream

“Why take the puny Prime when you have Lord Megatron right here!?”--Lugnut

“Because Lugnut! Everyone here has recently taken their mandatory breaks, which need I remind you I recommended you take. If this week has been tough on me, I can’t imagine how Prime must be and he is just as stubborn as I am when it comes to breaks. Anyways, I want to spend some time with him. It’s been a while since I’ve had a moment to chat with him.”--Buddy

Buddy looks at Megatron with puppy dog optics.

“You wouldn’t want me all sad knowing that my friend is suffering and me stuck here read to snap?”--Buddy

Megatron’s optics widen a bit.

But the leader is unwilling to give in screwing his optics shut.

Buddy smirks a bit and gently pries his servos open carefully playing with his digits.

“Megatron?”--Buddy

“Yes…?”--Megatron

Buddy suddenly thrusts her servos to his chassis bringing him down to her level.

Her optics looking at him dead serious.

“If I don’t get this break with my friend… I. will. Snap. You see that screwdriver on the wall. That’s going to be IN someone if I don’t get out.”--Buddy

Megatron gulps a bit before absent mindedly nodding.

Buddy’s face falls into extreme tiredness and hugs him before turning to everyone else like she didn’t just put fear into their leader a couple seconds ago.

“Thank you all for understanding. See you all tomorrow!”--Buddy

Buddy leaves the room ready to com in Optimus.

Megatron stands back up straightening his back, optics lingering on Buddy’s retreating form.

“Yeesh! Remind me never get on… whatever side that was…”--Blitzwing

Starscream looking at Megatron.

“Are you really going to let her go? Just like that?”--Starscream

“Of course not. We are going to watch over her.”--Megatron

Lugnut raises his servo.

“Yes Lugnut?”--Megatron

“…Is it wise to do that Lord Megatron? You could be betraying Buddy’s trust in the process. Yes, things have happened in the past with Buddy, but must we stoop so low as to spy on her as if she were an untrustworthy traitor? She is your partner after all…”--Lugnut

All the Cons look at Lugnut as if he grew a second helm.

“That was… insightful of you Lugnut.”--Blitzwing

“I am the only one here with a loving Conjunx.”--Lugnut

“… This is an order to watch over Buddy.”--Megatron

“As you command Lord Megatron!”--Lugnut

Meanwhile Prime just got off the com with Buddy.

Buddy was letting him know that she was going to pick him up so they could have a day for themselves.

He tried to tell her no, but Buddy casually mentioned what she did in the main room.

Now Optimus knew this was serious and changed his answer.

He could practically see Buddy tired smile as she thanked him and hung up.

“Attention everyone. I won’t be available for the rest of the day tomorrow. I’ve got plans with Buddy—”--Optimus

“So, we can join you.”--Sari

“She wants it to just be the two of us. A ‘friend day’ as she put it.”--Optimus

“And what about the Decepticon’s? what if they attack?”--Prowl

“I don’t think they are going to attack while Buddy is out.”--Optimus

“And how can you be so sure?”--Prowl

“Buddy can get very creative if she doesn’t get the mandatory break, even more when it gets disturbed.”—Optimus

He shivers a bit thinking about the last time that happened.

“What is she going to do? Put us in a web?”--Bumblebee

“The last mech who disturbed her peace ended up in the Academy’s med bay.”—Optimus

Silence…

“Say what now?”--Bumblebee

“Oh I know this story.”--Ratchet

“You do?”--Bulkhead

“She was one of my pupils, of course I know. She grabbed a couple rounds of sedative rounds and shot the mech in between the joint wirings. He didn’t come out of it for days.”—Ratchet

Most of the team has wide optics hearing this.

“How didn’t she get in trouble?!”--Bulkhead

“She knows how to hide the evidence. And if I know my student, she probably put the fear of Primus in Megatron if this day gets ruined.”--Ratchet

“And that’s why I’m going. Anyways it’s been a while since we’ve just had a day to ourselves. I expect there will be no interruptions unless there is an absolute emergency. And no, the controller running out of batteries is not an emergency. Good night.”--Optimus

Optimus made his way to his room as his team began to hatch a way to follow him and Buddy on their day off.

It was just a precaution; they weren’t going to let their day get ruined by the Cons.

The next day came in.

Buddy woke up earlier than usual excited for the day and ran to the exit, swinging to the city.

Around the same time Optimus started leaving the Plant.

Both teams were ready to start spying.

Buddy met Optimus in the park.

The two hugged and immediately started chatting away.

Imagine the surprise when both teams found each other spying on their teammates having the free day.

There was a small moment where they were going to fight but it was shushed by Ratchet.

He scolded them, warning that if they got caught not only would they be betraying the trust of the pair but the fact both needed this time.

“And we don’t want to end up like the mech in the medbay.”--Bulkhead

“What mech in the med bay?”--Lugnut

“Oh, she didn’t tell you? She put a mech in the med bay for disrupting her day off.”--Ratchet

“Yeah! She shot him with so many tranquilizers that he woke up days later!”--Sari

The Cons looked at each other with a sudden cold shiver running down their back.

Ratchet smirks a bit.

“By the Allspark she did put the fear of—”--Ratchet

“Shush! They’re going to hear us!”--Starscream

“Then truce. Nothing ruins their day. They both need this.”--Prowl

Reluctantly the Cons call a truce for the sake of their teammates.

They both ended up working to make sure Buddy’s and Optimus’s day was perfect.

From swatting incoming balls, shooing birds, even taking hits from a rough paint bot.

Buddy and Optimus were not oblivious to the fact both of their teams were following them.

But they thought it would be fun to play along.

Just to mess with them.

Eventually the day came to an end.

Buddy hugged her friend dearly and they both went to their homes.

Both teams raced to their individual bases and tried to act as if they didn’t do anything.

Optimus entered the plant to find most of his team scattered around the room.

They looked tired yet tried to act as if it was nothing.

“I take it you all had quite a day?”--Optimus

“Oh…ummm… Yeah! Bulkhead wanted to try a new painting style and it took all day!”--Bumblebee

Optimus gives them a look and walks to this room before stopping.

“We’re going to need to practice on your stealth Bumblebee. You can’t hide behind a hot dog cart and expect it to cover all of you.”—Optimus

Bumblebee stares at him with his jaw wide open.

Optimus smiled mischievously and went to his room.

He heard multiple groans and a sound that sounded like someone flicking someone on the helm.

Meanwhile with the Decepticons…

Buddy walked in acting a bit surprised seeing her team a little bit worn out and slightly dented.

“You guys had quite a day I’m guessing.”--Buddy

There are some groans here and there.

Buddy giggled a bit as she turns to hug each member of her team before giving an extra-long one to Megatron.

“I’ll fix all these in the morning, I think that sleeping off the day will do your frames good. Especially after getting pelted with pain guns.”--Buddy

As Buddy made her way back to her room she smiled a bit hearing the groans and something that sounded like a helm hitting the wall.

#transformers x reader #maccadam #bot buddy #tfa x reader #tfa x platonic reader #tfa megatron x reader #tfa optimus prime #elita ones twin sister

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wordy-little-witch · 2 months

Text

I am now hip deep in the Edge of Midnight campaign from legends of avantris and lemme tell you some shit -

1) I would lay down my life for Jericho Sticks without any hesitation. Torbek and Jericho are my sons now, no takesies backsies.

2) Lethica and Marius are so perfectly aligned to be end game lovers but I personally adore the idea of them being queerplatonic if only bc it's funny to watch people be confused and I think Lethica would adore that.

3) you can pry the concept of Briggsy having a some kind of magical fantasy cellphone equivalent from my cold dead hands - sending stone or smth idfk - and he's been keeping his buddy/boyfriend Torbek updated on all this like "Becky you would not BELIEVE what happened today-" ((listen I know the flirting bit between them in the yuletide one-shot was a feycurse but leave me alone it's funny as fuck))

4) briggsy @ jericho in ep 24 appropos nothing: Jerry, maybe we have to kiss ((sad, silly twinks with Literal Darksides are his type /j))

5) I have a friend-crush on Nikkie and I will never recover

6) I have an unyielding NEED to have Jericho get a final hit on a boss and yell yeehaw

7) I know stylistically Jericho doesn't have "skin" but I personally hc that his clothes aren't effectively his skin, he has a burlap body - and he has "tattoos" in the form of embroidery. It started when he had to stitch up his own cuts and stuff and he just kept it up.

8) Only Yorgrim has any constant sense of cooking in an actual kitchen-like setting. Farryn, Marius, and Briggsy can do journey or on-the-road cooking, but it's never.... great. Lethica burns everything somehow or gets the bright idea to 'experiment', and it's never good - she's fine if she's got clear end goals. Jericho is understandably skittish around fire due to his body and straw, but he is the closest to being able to cook well and do so semi regularly.

9) Virgil is a weird mix of a hater and lowkey overprotective. He does hate being imprisoned, but also he's kinda bound here so he HAS to keep this disaster of a bard safe. He refuses to admit he might have a soft spot. He is Stressed.

10) Farryn doesn't get the appeal of Girls Nights, but Jericho does!!! They join Lethica for some fun relaxation. Briggsy once asked why Jericho was allowed since he's also a dude, and Lethica just responded "he's allowed to be there - on account of him being a scarecrow and not a literal man after all." It's an inside joke which later has to be explained - Jericho is nonbinary but doesn't rightly care about stuff like that.

11) Yorgrim is the group dad, no I will not explain.

12) sometimes after a battle, Lethica and Marius will help stitch up some of Jericho's tears. Farryn may also add in random flowers she finds around because it makes him happy.

13) Briggsy is small but mighty. The only person he has yet to pick up and carry is Yorgrim - he swears that one day that tombstone will be gone and he'll be able to do it. It's all the rock's fault, he's sure of it.

Spoilers under the cut (caught up to present)

OKAY so I am caught up completely and have decided that Canon is not important leave me alone

• Yorgrim did not die - he got wounded heavily but survived.

• Farryn almost got taken but they got to her in time. She is mute for a time due to injuries and trauma - idk if she ever talks again bc we could use more sign language in the world. Maybe it comes and goes, fuck if I know, idk and idc

ONWARDS TO SILLIES

• Lethica strong armed her way into giving Jericho The Talk after he revealed he had no idea what a penis was. Scarecrows cannot blush, but apparently his fiendish glow can ebb and flow and he glows much MUCH brighter when he's embarrassed - she tries so hard not to laugh.

• Adella and Jericho btw are simply besties. His "crush" on her is a friend crush and Phillip just finds it painfully cute. ((Also -> Jericho has mommy issues and Adella always wanted a son/nephew/little brother. Peaceful alignment))

• Dark Mode Marius is a colossal flirt but still a giant dweeb. He's cool and suave until someone flirts back - then he's a mess.

• Briggsy is very happy with his Kannon & makes "shooting my shot" jokes at every and any opportunity

• Yorgrim, with his reward, manages to finally lay many souls tonrest but he still carries the tombstone on journeys - just not constantly now. He still believes he must pay penance, but it's a little easier to share the burden.

• Farryn, with her own reward, has not chosen to activate it yet. Something tells her to wait, to bide her time and remain. She does, however, get a little more at ease with the others. She and Jericho have come to an understanding, too - that being they they are a package deal, no takesies backsies, and they refer to each other as twin, much to the confusion of many, many, many people. WLW and NBLM solidarity.

• Jericho is pining HARD for Marius, but he's absolutely terrified of damaging the friendship so everyone is watching two oblivious dummies look longingly into each other.

• POLYAMORY POLYAMORY POLYAMORY

• Marius grows rather fond of Virgil, and the sentiment is very much NOT reciprocated bc this angry knight vampire is not good enough for his vessel and he's mad about it.

• Yorgrim: I've only had my friends for a few days, but if anything happened to them, I'd kill everyone in Druskenvald and then myself.

• I fully expect for Jericho to somehow befriend an enemy in disguise, not realize, and accidentally fuck up the evil plan with the powers of puns, music and friendship (/j)

• the first time the party sees Jericho presenting more feminine, he's been lended one of Lethica's dresses after his own clothes got torn up and the rest are being washed. Marius has a nosebleed and faints. Briggsy is staring somewhat respectfully. Lethica is trying valiantly not to laugh. Farryn and Yorgrim regret not dying when they had the chance.

• Marius: i cannot have a relationship because I have sworn to follow the duchess of sin

Lillith: whoa hold up, Do Not use me as an excuse to avoid the cutie pie over there. Besides, he has a demon. I'm queen of hell. I can make a small exception.

Marius: shit

• Briggsy Bi Icon: OH if ONLY Jerry here had a DASHING KNIGHT to SAVE THEM from this PERILOUS INCIDENT

Jericho: captain, I'm just getting off of a horse??

Marius: no no Briggsy has a point, no maiden should be unaccompanied or unassisted. Allow me-

Lethica&Farryn: We Know What You Are

• Yorgrim is watching all this inter party flirting and is definitely wondering if he's gonna have to have an aside with everyone about flirting tactics and communication skills. Briggsy is making it worse by enabling everyone.

• Farryn gets some sweet, succulent healing, that is all.

#can you tell that Jericho is my favorite #legends of avantris #edge of midnight #crie #i love these dumbasses #jericho sticks #marius renathyr #lethica nightborne #farryn of the hartsblight #yorgrim #briggsy kratch #houston help me #the brainrot is brainrotting

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lemotmo · 2 months

Note

One more! She got a follow up regarding the numbers guestimation.

A. Hi anon 🙂. It's actually relatively easy to figure out spamming. It's not a well thought out plan of action. And why I never understood why they thought it was a genius idea. My friend is a data analyst in his grown up real life so he could be much more technical than me, but I will give you the simple answer. Comment sections are full of the same blogs. The same blog names you can track from ppst to post on Instagram, Twitter and Ticktock. Same on Tumblr. The same group of blogs do all the spamming. It's also fairly easy to decipher which blogs/accounts are being run by the same person. Speech patterns, sentence structures. Posts that feel repetitive or similar to another blogs post. It's not a sophisticated tactic. And I do want to stress that there's not really anything wrong with doing it, except in this case people were doing it to send hate to the cast and to spam the shows official accounts. That's disgusting. And they deserve to be called out and busted for it.

Fandom is supposed to be fun, and it usually is. Smaller fandoms are usually the best kind of fandoms because less people usually means less manufactured drama. They tend to just stay in their lane and headcanon and fanon away with one another. It's great. All fandoms usually end up having de facto 'leader' blogs. It just happens. They tend to become the bigger voices within the fandom. Sometimes fandoms get lucky and they're legitimately cool decent people running them. Sometimes fandoms get unlucky and those blogs are run by douchebags (legit couldn't think of a nicer word, I'm so sorry). Unfortunately for you all, you wound up with the douchebags. The blogs you all ended up following the lead of were basically like politicians who had to manufacture enemies (Oliver and Ryan) and ship wars (Buddie) in order to get attention because their fandom numbers weren't big enough to garner attention any other way. That's the reality. They needed bigger numbers so they pretended to be more people. Only instead of just shipping their ship and enjoying it they used those extra blogs to openly send vile, disgusting and increasingly unhinged things to the show and its cast and anyone else who didn't ship their ship. Openly sending hate to a cast has never led to victory for shippers. It's the dumbest idea of dumb ideas. And inevitably leads nowhere. No one can outrun their hubris. And when you decide to start ranting about being sent private DM's from Tim, something that is blatantly and laughably false, it's the beginning of your end. The good news is increasing numbers of you have finally realized this and are backing away. If you genuinely enjoy the ship by all means ship it as long as it's canon, hell you can ship it once it stops being canon. That's what fandom is for. But you have to acknowledge the reality of canon. You can hate it. You can ignore it, but you have to acknowledge it. And then retreat to fanfic. It's the fandom way. But you don't get to yell and scream about homophobia and other invented wrongs because a higher number of people ship the other ship and the show doesn't appear to be telling the story that that blog and others desperately tried to convince people they were telling. Artificially inflated numbers don't change reality.

Oh, this is interesting. I had a basic understanding of how the detection of spamming worked, but this is very informative and frankly very fascinating as well.

The rest of this is, once again, serving major truth bombs. I'm in awe of the eloquence on display here. I wish I could meet the OP in real life. I have a feeling I'd love to talk fandom with them.

And it's true you know, shipping a couple doesn't have to stop because another one is canon. In fact, we are here doing the exact same thing. BT is canon right now. We know this. We accept it for what it is at the moment, but that doesn't stop us from shipping Buddie, speculating about their future, theorising what will happen in season 8, writing and reading fic, making gifsets, creating art, digging up parallels, discussing our own personal headcanons. We've been doing this for years, through multiple love interests for Buck and Eddie. We never quit and I highly doubt we ever will, canon or not canon.

Thank you again for dropping this in my ask box Nonny! :)

Remember, no hate in comments or reblogs. Let's keep it civil and respectful. Thank you.

If you are interested in more of the anonymous OP’s posts, you can find all of their posts so far under the tag: anonymous blog I love.

#anonymous blog I love #insight into 911 fandom & season 7 and 8 #BT fandom #Buddie fandom #nonnies galore #911 abc

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lunajay33 · 1 year

Text

Brother Trouble❤️‍🩹

Summary: You went out looking for formula with Glenn and Maggie and came across Merle, your boyfriends lost brother and things don’t go well

•Masterlist•

Ive been with the group since the start at the quarry, I first was drawn to Daryl but was always nervous to approach him when Merle was around but once he was gone me and Daryl grew to love each other and have been together ever since the incident at the CDC

“Let’s get Judith a toy, it’ll be good for her to play with something!” I said to Glenn as he went into the store

After we picked up what we needed we loaded it into the truck and we’re about to leave but I still had a basket in my hand

“Well hello, what are you all doing out here” I heard, turning to see Merle with a gun held up to us, making Maggie and Glenn to take out theirs and raise them

“Merle, you’re alive” Glenn stated

“Woah Woah Woah, Glenn and y/n good to see y’all, is Daryl still with ya, is he alive?” He asked as he lowered his gun

“He’s still alive”

“Can you take me to him”

“You stay here and we will tell him” Glenn said with his gun still held up

“Come on just take me to where you are”

“No like I said we will bring him here”

I could see the anger rise on Merle’s face and I knew there was trouble, it happens so fast, he pulled out a gun from his pants and shot, I ducked and when I looked up he hand his makeshift arm knife to Maggie’s throat

“Get in the car now or she dies” Merle said pushing his knife harder against Maggie

I dropped the basket and we all got in the truck and we drove off to god knows where

~~~~~~

We were all in esperante rooms, tied to a chair but I could hear everything, I could hear Glenn get beat to a pulp and Maggie crying then it was my turn when merle came in with the governor

“Now who do we have here?” The governor asked but I didn’t say a word, I wasn’t really one to talk much, maybe that’s why Daryl liked being around me but I knew from the pasted that merle hated it

“She not talk or something?” He asked merle

“Oh she talks, she just a freak that never speaks when spoken to” Merle said as he walked behind me and held his knife to my throat like he did Maggie

“Where is my brother huh?” He asked as he lightly slide the knife across my neck enough to draw blood

I still didn’t break, the prison was our home I couldn’t sell that out

“Untie her” the governor said and Merle was quick to cut the ropes and make me stand

“Now take off your clothes” he said and I was stunned

“No”

“Oh she does speak, you will take off all your clothes or your buddies in the next rooms will be dead by night fall” he said glaring into my soul

I felt sick but I couldn’t risk the lives of my family

I took off all my clothes with shaky hands and covered myself with my hands

“Do what you have to go get her to talk, I’ll be back later and you better have an answer” he said the Merle as he left the room

I looked at merle scared for my life

He was smirking and started to cut me all over my body, leaving blood drip all over my body, the pain was unbearable and he started hitting on me like he did to Glenn, after a while of this torture I was left on the floor feeling like a shell of a person

I still didn’t rat out or home and he left, I sat in the corner naked, bloody and bruised

I heard trouble in the room over and Maggie and Glenn crying then I heard Maggie tell them about the prison

I sighed but understood how hard it was for them

“Y/n! Are you okay?” I heard Maggie yell out

“Im fine” i answered back not wanting to stress them any further

I waited in that room for a while just praying Daryl would come and rescue me and make me feel alright again and that’s when I heard guns, and fighting

The door to my room was being kicked in and that when I saw him, my savior and my love

“Daryl” I sighed feeling relieved

He ran up to me with the others at the door

He looked so mad but his eyes showed hurt, sadness and concern

He took off his flannel and wrapped it around me

“Come on peach, we’re gonna get you home” he said as he lifted me up and supported me by holding my waist and helping me walk out

We followed the others and I tried to keep up even though I felt so weak

Bullets were flying and gun shots were all I heard, axel got hit but the rest of us got out

We got to the truck and I instantly passed out on Daryl’s lap knowing I was safe now

~The next day~

I woke up in mine and Daryl’s cell and tried sitting up but groaned at the pain, I looked down and I was all patched up and dressed in Daryl comfy clothes

“Daryl?” I called out and in a second he was next to the bed

“Hey peach, how’re ya feelin?” He asked as he brushed my hair back, just the feeling of him near me makes me feel better, but I still have that ache inside

“I’m fine”

“Don’t lie to me, how I found ya that’s not fine, what happened?”

“I’m not ready yet” I said looking away feeling guilty, I know I’m evil and sick with Merle but he was the only family Daryl had left and I felt so conflicted

“I’m here when yer ready my peach, now come on let’s get some food in ya” he said picking me up and bring me out to the eating area

~Few days Later~

I got up late still trying to deal with what happened and when I walked out to help Beth with Judith I saw Merle talking with the others

I felt my heart drop and I felt sick again but this time I physically got sick just from the thought of being near him

I ran to a near by bin and threw up, I felt a hand rub my back and I knew it was Daryl

“Ya alright?” He asked

“What is he doing here Daryl?” I asked as my voice quivered

“He left that place I couldn’t leave him out there”

“Y’all seem pretty chummy brother” Merle said from across the room

“Well ya they’ve been together for a long time” Beth stated

“This is yer bitch” he asked shocked

“Watch yer mouth” Daryl groaned glaring at him

“If I knew I wouldn’t ‘ave…..” he trailed off

“What? Wouldn’t ‘ave done what?” Daryl asked standing up

“The governor he….he made me do it”

“You’re lying, he left the room you could’ve just left me” I stated

Daryl looked between me and Merle and it clicked

“YOU DID THIS TO HER?” Daryl yelled

“Dumb bitch put up a fight I had to get answers” that’s when Daryl got up close to him completely vivid

I couldn’t stand being in here anymore, I snuck out the cell block and sat out side

I tried to get the memories out of my head but it just kept playing over in my head

“You know the governor did something similar to me when we were there” I heard next to me and it was Maggie

“I don’t want to talk about it, I just want to forget, I feel so dirty”

“I think you’ll feel better when you get this off your chest and tell Daryl” she says as she gets up and leaves being replaced by Daryl himself

“I wouldn’t have brought him here if I knew, I’m sorry peach, I hate that I wasn’t there earlier to save ya”

“I feel wrong, I feel so dirty and I don’t know if I’ll ever feel better again, what they made me do, what they did to me”

“What did he do peach?”

I sighed realizing I need to tell him

“They made me take off all my clothes, they said if I didn’t they’d kill Glenn and Maggie, then….Merle tortured me, cut me up until I was just blood, beat me until he got too tired, humiliated me and all the others saw me like that when you saved me, I just don’t wanna feel like this anymore” I said crying feeling Daryl pull me close

“I’ll never let anything happen to ya again, I’m s’ sorry, I’ll get rid of him immediately”

“You can’t kick out your brother Daryl, I don’t wanna hurt you by doing that” I said

“He ain’t my brother anymore after doing that to you, to my peach, all I care about is how yer feeling and can’t have that when he’s around, plus I’ll try and kill ‘im if I have to be near him knowing he hurt ya”

“I love you so much Daryl, more than anything” I said looking up at him

“Love ya too, yer my world and nothin’ll ever hurt ya again”

~~~~~~

Thanks for reading everyone lmk what you thought and leave suggestions for more walking dead imagines

#daryl dixion imagine #twd daryl #daryl dixon #twd fanfiction #twd x reader #twd fluff #twd rick #twd michonne #twd negan #daryl dixon twd

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faeflowerz · 1 year

Text

TWST Guys as Monsters

Of all the things that could inspire me. Its a fnaf cryptid post. I used monsters since the cryptids I found weren't as fun as I wanted them to be. Oh well!

Warnings: None

Characters: Riddle, Azul, Idia

If you like what you see, feel free to shoot me a request! Anon isn't on but I won't post your name unless you ask me to. ✌🏿

Monster!Riddle would probably make a good sleep paralysis demon? Well, in theory. You'd been pulling all nighters to get through your exams. Since its your finals before graduation, you're pretty stressed. The week before, you had ended up falling asleep halfway through your cram session. Books and pens and paper were scattered all on top of you as you have THAT kind of dream again. You know the one. Where you dream of going through your day only to find out that you'd been in bed the whole time. But this time, when you realize that you're lucid, he is there.

By your bedside, a shadowy figure is pawing at the supplies scattered on your lap. You wanna yell at him, but you're woefully immobile. "You can't possibly believe that studying this way will help you," when he looks to you, fear swells in your heart. All you could make out were cold gray and the rest of him is short and comprised of black shadows and red haze. His long claws picks up your textbook curiously, careful not to rip anything. "Interesting. The history of you humans never ceases to amaze me." Then he notices your (lovingly refurbished) tablet and is about to reach for it. You manage to whimper in protest.

Then he stops. The concern in your eyes tells him what the matter was. The monster leaves it alone, but now his attention is completely on you. Despite the initial terror, you can sort of make out a face when he's face to face with you. Maybe you're still dreaming or crazy, but he sort of has a baby face. Then he says something that surprises you.

"Can you show me more?"

Monster!Azul: would be a kraken. Why wouldn't he be? You'd been shipwrecked and stranded on an uninhibited island. Not only are you desperate for a way back to civilization, you've also been extremely lonely. Or at least, you would have been if you weren't being helped by what you could only assume was a spirit on the island. From catching fish to knocking down trees to even warning you of storms, the spirit seems tentatively friendly. That is, until you finally make the boat you'd been working on. It's a raft, but still.

And so you whisper a prayer of gratitude to the spirit and set sail. And you get some distance...until a huge wave knocks you over, decimating your tiny little bundle of wood. You have no time to panic as something grabs your ankle and drags you down. You're sure you're drowning, but you didn't have to take even one gulp air. And yet, you gasp and flail with terror as you come face to face with your spirit. He's huge. His hand wraps around your entire body and you cease moving in fear of being squeezed to death.

"I do believe it’s time to collect on those favors," he says.

Monster!Idia is a mothman and hes still pathetic. You're out with some friends in a cabin for the weekend. Its pretty boring since your buddies are on the glamp type beat. Still, you got all this shit bc you wanted to rough it in the woods, damn it!! So you grab your shit and hike out away from them. They begged you to take your phone, but a REAL camper has nothing but moss on the trees and the moon. Its pretty full too.

So its going well for a bit until it rains. Too far to get back to the cabin, you hide out in a cave. Thankfully you salvaged what you can and make a fire for the night. You're tired and you start to regret everything. Then your eyes close. You swear you heard something shuffling around but you hope it's just the dead leaves and crackling fire. Until you feel something watching you. Your eyes shoot open and before you is a fuzzy man with wings tucked discreetly behind his back. Someone screams but it wasn’t you. It was him, and he scurries away from you.

"Eek! Y-you're alive?!"

"Of course I am! Why on earth would you think I was dead?"

"I just figured...since you're here and not at that cabin...you must have died to come all the way out here." He stays close to the fire, glancing at it every now and then.

"Ah, no...I wanted to rough it in the woods. That's the point of camping."

"...That's stupid," he finally says after a long silence. You sit up in shock. "You didn’t even pack anything useful for your mission. If it wasn't for this cave, it really would be game over for you." The lanky man grins, and his razor sharp teeth makes you shiver. Then, he moves slightly and scoots only a little closer. You catch a glimpse of the underside of his wings and see brilliant cerulean and black.

"It was the rain," you manage to reply. "Had it not been for that, I wouldn't have lost half my stuff." Crossing your arms, you try to rub off the goosebumps on your skin. Another long silence before you see that blue again, this time around your shoulder. The mothman had moved closer.

"I read that humans can get cold easily...so uh...just this once...I'll let you warm up." Neither of you acknowledge the blushes that forms on both your faces.

#twst writing #twisted wonderland #azul ashengrotto #riddle rosehearts #idia shroud #azul x reader #riddle x reader #idia x reader #twst imagines #twst #faes drabbles

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supercalime · 5 months

Note

I can’t believe I found people who think about this the exact same way as I do. I don’t get these hardcore buddie stans who suddenly try to make it look like buckTommy shipper are the toxic ones. I haven’t seen a single BuckTommy shipper who was rude without a reason (maybe a bit defensive about their CANON ship). Whereas I’ve seen plenty of incredibly toxic buddie stans who insult everyone who doesn’t ship their ship or share their opinions.

Another thing and don’t get me wrong Im not defending anyone. But I’ve seen many people heavily bullying the marisol actress because she’s apparently homophobic (not saying she isn’t or is) and wanting her to be gone beacause of this reason but totally ignore the alleged racism of ryan (again not saying he is racist or not, i dont know them personally) just because he is part of their beloved ship. By their logic Ryan should leave the show too.

Hey anon, it took me some time to answer your ask (chaotic life stuff lol) but I’m glad to finally have time to talk about this first part with you.

I’ll preface by saying I won’t get involved in actor drama, no matter how true or toxic it is because I don’t have enough information nor am I qualified to talk about the issues they mishandled. I’ll just say that, no matter who does bad things, they should be held accountable.

Okay, back to the main point: yes, it’s very strange how b*ddie st*ns are behaving towards the canon bi!buck thing. Both with people who ship bucktommy but also with the creators and actors on the show. Regardless if they are right or not about b*ddie being canon, this is not how you act with entertainment, specially with the people giving the content.

I hate to bash but it looks and sounds a lot like a toddler throwing a tantrum because they didn’t get a specific toy.

And toddlers only throw tantrums because they are brand new humans who are learning how to behave. They don’t know any better so they react with outbursts and repeated demands because it’s the only way they know to get the attention of the person taking care of them.

If I’m not mistaken, the main audience for the show is 18-45. NO ONE here should be yelling in comment sections “we want buddie! we want buddie! we want buddie!” as if they would immediately get it. It’s not how it works and it’s frankly embarrassing to see a bunch of adults acting like that for everyone to see.

And I can’t stress it enough, I’m not putting myself on a high ground here and saying I’m a better person by shipping bucktommy, as I’m sure there might be a percentage of fans out there being rude and annoying as well. But at least I’m keeping my conscience clear by not acting like me shipping two characters is something big enough in my life to ruin my enjoyment of a whole show in case my favorite ship doesn’t become canon.

I hate how fandoms behave as if they can have control over the content they are consuming. We aren’t entitled to anything and if there is supposed to be ANY discourse about which character was supposed to end with, that should happen AFTER the show ended! The story isn’t over yet! So why are b*ddie st*ns so stressed? If a show is making you this angry and demanding, please step aside a little, give it some distance because that’s not how consuming content is supposed to make you feel.

And I say that last part with sincerity because I too got way too involved with fandom discourse in the past, to the point that I had to distance myself from certain shows because being that involved made me upset.

Im just tired at this point you know. Im trying to protect myself as much as possible. Im not in the bird app, I don’t follow the show or the actors on social media, im avoiding interviews like the plague. All I want from this experience is to watch the show, gather my thoughts, form my opinions, log onto tumblr and reblog the cute stuff I see about my favorite ship without having to worry about whatever the hell is going on outside my pretty little bubble

#lety rambles #ask #911 #911 abc #bucktommy #tevan #firefly #firepilot

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here4kpopfics · 2 years

Text

Feeling in Chaos - Fall pt. 2 | JJK

Pairing: Jungkook x (f) reader

Genre: drama, angst, smut

AU: art college!au, friends to lovers, best friend’s brother

Wordcount: 12,670

Summary: It’s time to talk about it.

Rating: M / 18+

Warnings: Language. Grief. Panic attacks. MC has PTSD and is learning how to get through it. Jealousy. Self-loathing. Ryujin’s trying. Koo’s going through something. Possibly problematic friendship/relationship.

Smut Warnings: None, just mentions of the smut in the previous chapter.

AN: Ah, so…surprise? Over two months later…This chapter has a lot going on. A lot of much needed conversations and finally some attempts to move forward. I have nothing further to add, except for my apologies for it being late. 😅Thank you to the soulmate @playmetheclassics for beta reading. ily

Banner and Divider by @classicscreations

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When you finally get to the club, you glance around to ensure Ryujin isn’t outside. You walk to the front of the line and get the security guard’s attention.

“I’m sorry, my friend is in there, she’s drunk, and I just need to get her out and take her home. Is there any way I can just go in and grab her?”

The tall buff man that could honestly give The Rock a run for his money shakes his head.

“Sorry, miss. I’ve heard that line one too many times. You’ll have to wait in line with the others.”

“Please? She’s grieving, and I just. I need to get her home before she does something she regrets.”

He only shakes his head again and points towards the back of the line. You sigh, grabbing your phone and calling her again. She answers, but you can barely hear her over the thumping bass.

“Ry? I’m outside. They won’t let me in. Come out, and we can go home.”

“Wha? Where are yo—?”

Her voice cuts off as the call ends. You groan in annoyance, getting in the stupid long line to get in the shitty building.

The sense of panic sets in again as you wait. How do you get her home? What do you say? Do you let her speak? Do you wait until she’s sober to talk? Or do you yell at her now and hope she remembers? How the fuck are you going to get her home? Yoongi was right. But, fuck, you can’t get him involved in this. You’ve already gotten too close to him tonight. You can’t do it anymore.

You go to your contacts, pressing the call button and hating yourself already. It only rings twice before he picks up.

“Y/n? Are you okay? Are you still at the studio?” Your heart cracks at the voice laced with worry.

“No, Jungkook. I left already.”

“Where are you? Because you’re not at your apartment.”

“Have you been waiting there?” Your voice falters. The image of him waiting in your apartment while you’re on the couch in your studio getting fucked and almost confessed to by your group therapy buddy flashing in your mind makes you want to scream.

He stays silent, answering your question without saying a word.

“Kookie…I need your help.” You exhale a shaky breath, trying to stay focused.

“What happened? Did he do something?” There’s a certain bite in his voice that feels like an attack on you, but you set it aside, planning on stressing over it later.

“No, Koo. He didn’t do anything. It’s Ry. She’s at this club or bar or whatever, she’s shitfaced and called me, and I’m waiting outside, but I…I don’t know how to get her home.”

He gives it a moment after your voice trails off, finally speaking again after a while.

“You want me to come get you two?” His voice is softer, but still tense, and you hate it.

“Yes, please…” you quietly admit, and you can hear the sound of his keys moving as he tells you to send the address via text and to wait for him.

This feels too familiar.

“Jungkook?” You quickly speak up before he hangs up.

“Yes, y/n?”

“Please drive carefully.” you feel your stomach twist, “get here safely, okay?”

He doesn’t need to ask why you’re saying these things. He knows. You know he knows. He reassures you he’ll be okay, hanging up only when you’re ready, and you look back down at your phone as the call ends.

Five minutes later, you’re almost at the front of the line when you see Ryujin stumbling out of the building, looking around in confusion.

“Ry!” You shout as you finally escape the line, much to the satisfaction of the people behind you. You want to run to her, but she’s still a ticking time bomb, and you’re already on edge enough that you don’t want to risk her wrath even if she was the one that called you.

“Y/n!” She shouts back, tears streaming down her face as she runs to you. You let her hug you first, hesitantly hugging her back and only tightening your hold when she starts sobbing against your shoulder.

“Hey hey hey, I’m here. It’s okay, Ry. What happened?” You don’t expect an answer and don’t let go, just letting her desperately hold onto you and cry.

When she finally lets go of you, you guide her to sit on the curb. It’s gross, but it’s away from the club goers passing by, and it’s still within sight of the security guard. Your hands never leave her, one on her back and the other gripping one of hers like if you let go, she’d vanish from you too.

You stay silent for her, watching her battle with the thoughts in her head and the words behind her ruby-red lips. You look away, down the street to see if Jungkook’s car would be in view, but you wanted to give her more space.

“I don’t blame you.” Her voice cracks, and your neck almost snaps when turning back to her.

“What?” You’re afraid to ask in case it all goes wrong.

“For…for Kai’s death. I don’t blame you. I never did.” Her grip on your hand tightens, and the tears fall again across her beautiful face. “I know it’s not your fault. But I just…I needed someone to hate, someone that isn’t me.”

Her? Why? Why would she…?

“Ry, what do you mean someone that isn’t you?”

She finally looks up at you, her chest rising and falling rapidly as she relives memories you have no idea about. Moments she wishes she could forget or do over.

“It doesn't matter now.” She shakes her head, holding your hand close to her chest. “Please, y/n. I’m so sorry. I’m so fucking sorry. You’re my best friend and there’s no excuse for the things I said. Please don’t hate me. I can’t lose you, too.”

You look at your best friend. The girl that was born a day before you in the same hospital. The girl that asked to draw with you on the playground. The girl that yelled at anyone and everyone that dared say anything bad about you. The girl that held you as you cried over your first heartbreak. And your second, third, fourth…

The girl that, despite coming across as perfect to the world, bared her soul, fears, and insecurities to you one night after sneaking into her parents’ liquor cabinet. The girl that promised to be by your side for forever when your parents said you’d be nothing. The girl you watched fall in love with your brother, having the most beautiful and loving relationship with him.

The girl who fell apart just as badly as you did. But instead of seeking help, she burned the world around her down, starting with you.

Her name quietly escapes your lips, but before you can say anything else, Jungkook pulls up against the curb next to you. He quickly exits the car to squat down in front of you both, eyes meeting yours briefly before turning his attention to his sister.

He looks exhausted.

“Hey, Rybread. You okay?” He gently grabs her free hand, bringing her attention away from you and to him instead. She nods, a broken sob escaping when Jungkook helps her stand, you having to stand with her because her hand is still tightly gripping yours.

“Let’s get you two home, yeah?” He gently speaks to only her, still refusing to look at you for more than a second. You carefully pull your hand away from Ryujin, watching Jungkook help his sister enter the backseat. When she’s finally in, seatbelt on, head leaning back, eyes closed, he looks back at you.

You hate the sadness in those big beautiful brown eyes. Hate the dark bags forming underneath them. Hate that you’re probably the cause of some of it.

“Are you okay to sit in the backseat or do you need to be upfront?” His question is as monotone as he can make it, but you can still pick up on the notes of concern in his words.

You open your mouth to speak, eyes glancing between the backseat and the passenger’s seat, when Jungkook shuts Ryujin’s door a little harsher than necessary, causing you both to jump.

“Upfront it is. Come on.” He mumbles, opening the passenger’s side door before returning to the driver’s seat with a huff.

You get in only when he’s put his seatbelt on and turned the key in the ignition, the engine roaring to life. You put your seatbelt on, backpack across your lap and fingers toying with the straps for a moment before a big hand reaches for your left hand.

His fingers intertwine with yours, settling on his lap, his free hand on the steering wheel, effortlessly pulling away from the curb and driving off.

Your eyes stay on the road, trying to watch every car while simultaneously trying to remind yourself to breathe. At every stop light, Jungkook brings your joined hand to his chest, his thumb rubbing the back of your hand until the light turns green and you’re past the intersection.

You say nothing, forcing the fear deep down inside to deal with when you’re alone. Your right hand grips the door handle like you’re bracing for impact, and it takes everything in you not to scream to pull over. The last time you were in a car was on the way home from the funeral. You were so ready to jump out of the car on the highway, actually opening the door at one point, not caring what happened to you, only about getting out.

“You need to breathe, y/n.” His voice is gentle but still in that monotone voice. It doesn’t match the way his thumb is soothing over your hand or how tightly he’s holding it.

You hadn’t realized you were barely taking any breaths, afraid if you did, you’d scream or cry. You still don’t respond, only squeezing his hand in response as you take a deep breath, shakingly exhaling after.

“I’m trying. It’s just—” you look down for a moment, your free hand playing with the zipper on your back, “I’m too focused on not panicking. I don’t know. I’m sorry.”

“Why are you apologizing?” His voice is losing the monotone effect, and you sneak a glance at his face. His jaw is clenched, and he looks anything but soft, more stoic instead.

“I don’t know…I’m sure there’s a list of shit I need to apologize for that’s so long, I wouldn’t even know where to start.”

“The top, usually.” He’s quick to respond, and you have to fight the urge to give even the smallest smile.

“The top…the top says ‘I’m sorry you met me and got dragged into this.’”

“Well, that’s a stupid apology.” He says after a moment. “You didn’t know what would happen when we were kids. If you did, I’d have many questions. One being lottery numbers.”

You quietly laugh to yourself. Eyes jumping from the roads, to your hand in his, and his face that still won’t look at you. You’re partially relieved he’s keeping his eyes on the road.

“And I’m not sorry I met you. You’re insanely frustrating at times. You drive me to be a jealous mess of hopelessness plagued by unrequited love. But I’m not sorry I met you. Not even a little bit. I’d rather have you in my life than out of it.”

You stare at him, lips parting with no words able to form. He’s confessed in various ways so many times now, and it feels like a punch in the gut every time. This time, however, feels more like a stab to the heart.

“…it’s not hopeless, Jungkook.” You swallow thickly, looking away from him and focusing on his hand wrapped around your own instead. “And it’s not unrequited…”

“Feels a lot like it…”

You say nothing, the car stopping in the apartment complex.

You barely even registered the rest of the drive home once he started talking. Your breathing was steadied, your heart rate was racing, albeit for a different reason, and you weren’t trying to escape the car.

Jungkook gets out first, walking around to get to Ryujin sitting behind you. You quietly get out, watching him try to coax her awake, eventually giving up and handing you the keys before scooping her out of the car.

You lock the car when he’s got her, following behind inside to the elevator and to the apartment, neither speaking except for random gibberish from your tipsy sleeping best friend.

He sits her down on the counter in the bathroom while you grab her a change of clothes. He leaves the both of you alone so you can help her remove her makeup and do your best to take her through her beauty routine. She'd always go on about how she could never miss a day, walking you through each step for moments like this.

What feels like ages later, you finally emerge from the bathroom, letting her change in private, and head back down to the living room. Jungkook is sitting on the armrest of the couch with palms running across his face while you lean against the wall.

The atmosphere is awkward. You don’t know what to say, so you pull out your phone, remembering your spat with Yoongi.

Y/N (3:35 am): hey. I’m home. I hope you made it back okay. I’m really sorry about what I said. You didn’t deserve that.

You hit send and watch as it switches from delivered to read within seconds. The typing bubbles appear moments later.

Yoongi (3:35 am): Apologize with pie.

A shaky giggle escapes your lungs before you can catch it, and Jungkook scoffs.

Your head snaps up to the sound, wide eyes and body frozen. He shakes his head, eyes cast to the floor. You lower your gaze back to the phone, trying to decide what to type next when he finally speaks to you.

“So why didn’t Yoongi come with you to get Ry?” You look back up at him; he’s still trying to stay neutral, a stoic demeanor that doesn’t care.

“Koo–”

“I mean, it’s kind of a dick move to let a woman walk alone at this hour, isn’t it?” He crosses his arms, repositioning his stance as if he’s uncomfortable.

“I didn’t want him to come with me. He insisted but I yelled at him…” you sigh, briefly looking back at your phone before tucking it back in your pocket. “I didn’t want him to get involved in all of this.” you gesture all around you, mostly towards Ryujin’s door and Jungkook himself.

He stares you down, tilting his head to the side and even though he’s not directly in front of you or right next to you, his stare makes you feel small. It feels suffocating - like he’s hovering above you and you’re backed into a corner.

His eyes scan your face, your bruised lips, the very light, barely there yet hickies on your neck as well as the guilty expression. His eyes widen, and the stoic demeanor is gone, replaced by one you can’t quite read, but know all too well.

“It’s not just sex, is it? There are feelings there.” His question knocks the wind out of you, and you shrink down even more.

“I don’t know.” the only response you can bring yourself to say that won’t hurt either of you.

You were wrong.

“What do you mean you don’t know? Either you like him, or you don’t.”

You open your mouth to speak, but Ryujin’s door opens just as you do. She stands at the top of the stairs in the pajamas you picked out, and she looks exhausted, eyes swollen and puffy from crying. You rip your attention away from her brother when she mumbles your name.

You rush to grab her hand, bringing her back to her room and guiding her to her bed. She gets in, but the tears start streaming again.

“He’s really gone…” she whispers, pulling the covers to her chin.

You nod, Jungkook comes in after you with water and pills for her to take. Ryujin shakes her head.

“No. The smell. He’s gone. I could sleep because I could smell him in the sheets. Now it’s gone.”

This is the longest she’s spoken to you since before the crash. And you’re still scared of her reaction to your responses. So you tell her to wait, going back to her bathroom and forcing yourself to open the cabinet he took over when he kept staying the night, finding the little bottle you were hoping to find.

You were secretly hoping to break into her room one day to find the bottle and keep it for yourself. But you kept reminding yourself she probably needed it more.

When you come back, you tell her to give you her pillow, and she obliges. You take the cap off the cologne bottle, spraying the pillow lightly as it dangles in your hand away from you. You hand it back to her, smiling a little when she hugs it, taking a deep breath.

“It smells like him…” she murmurs, laying back down, pillow resting under her head.

“I know it’s not the same, but hopefully it helps enough.” You whisper, lightly petting her hair as her eyes close and a small smile forms.

“We should buy it in bulk. So it can always smell like him.” you let out a shaky laugh.

“I’ll get right on that, Ry. Now get some sleep, okay?”

“Okay.”

You get up to leave the room, Jungkook starting to lead the way when a small hand wraps around your wrist. You turn to look at Ryujin who looks panicked.

“Y/n, you forgive me, right?”

You open your mouth to respond but, for what feels like the millionth time tonight, are cut off before you can form words.

“You do, right? You know I didn’t mean any of it. I would never. Please. Please say you forgive me.”

You say nothing, looking to Jungkook for help. He stands at the doorway, hands in his hoodie’s pocket, seemingly uninterested in this conversation. You sigh, turning back to her, gently grabbing the hand attached to your wrist to peel her off you, but her grip tightens.

“We’ll talk about this when you’re sober, Ry, okay? Get some sleep.”

“No. Not until you forgive me.”

“Ry.” your voice shakes, a piercing pain in your eyes as you can feel the tears forming.

“Y/n, please,”

“I…–”

“Ryujin, stop.” Jungkook interjects, both you and his sister looking towards the owner of the stern voice.

“Let her go. Go to bed. She’ll talk to you about it when you’re sober.”

You both stay silent, your eyes glued to her grip on your wrist, hers bouncing between you, her brother, and her hold on you. After a few moments, she finally lets go, laying back down and hugging her pillow.

“Okay. Tomorrow…” she whispers in defeat.

“Tomorrow.” you mimic the word, pulling her blanket back over her to keep her warm before finally shuffling out of the room, walking past Jungkook, who closes the door once you’re both out.

You run your fingers through your hair, steadying your breathing, so you don’t cry in front of Jungkook more than you already have.

You both lean against the back of the couch this time. Both are dead silent as you figure out who should speak first. Your eyes cast down to the floor, watching his feet shift as he tries to find a more comfortable stance.

“You shouldn’t forgive her.” You look up at him to see he was doing the same thing as you, eyes to the ground.

“What?”

“You shouldn’t forgive Ryujin.”

“Jungkook. She…she didn’t mean it—”

“No, y/n. Have you not heard the shit she’s been screaming at you? Have you not heard the shit she’s accused you of?” He turns to face you, his voice a harsh whisper.

“Do you not remember how fucking terrible she’s made your life the last two months? You’ve had to fucking sneak into your apartment, change your schedules to be the opposite of hers, so you don’t run into her.”

“I…” your words stumble over one another in your mind.

“She’s my best friend, Jungkook. She’s grieving. I…her world just got crushed. What do you expect me to do? Just sever all ties with her and leave? Leave her to be all by herself? And what about you? You’re her brother, Jungkook. If I do that with her, I do that with you. And I’m not going to do that. Not with the two people that mean more than anything to me.”

Fuck not again. Please don’t cry again.

“I’ll talk to her about it tomorrow. I won’t forgive her until I know she means it. I’m so fucking tired right now, so can we please just end this conversation?”

The words rush out in a few short breaths, tears still threatening to escape when you look at him. You can’t tell what he’s thinking. His facial expression holds many different emotions. His eyes are sad, angry, desperate, and scared.

“Fine.”

You fucked up again. Twice in one night. Way to go, y/n, you idiot.

“I’ll head home. Good luck.” He turns away from you, but before you can think it through, your hand grabs his wrist like his sister did to you moments ago.

“It…it’s almost three in the morning. Just stay here.”

You’re both staring at his wrist, captured by your fingers, and in the quiet, you give a small squeeze, pleading. But his next words feel like a direct stab to the heart.

“Is your boyfriend gonna be okay with that?”

“He’s not…”

“Please stop lying to me. Just admit there’s something there so I can try to move on, like really try.”

No.

Don’t move on.

You’re mine.

I won’t let you go.

“Koo…” the name barely falls from your lips. “I can’t.”

In the blink of an eye, he’s trapped you between his body and the back of the couch. Both hands, yours still clutching his wrist, cup your face and tilting you to look up at him.

“You can’t be honest with me? Or you can’t admit there’s something there with him?”

You close your eyes to prevent the tears, but they win, escaping down your cheeks only to be caught and wiped away by his thumbs.

Your name is a soft pleading whisper on his lips, making you want to crawl into a cave forever. You can only say the first thing that comes to your mind.

“Please…just stay.”

You feel his forehead press against yours, noses touching, lips mere inches away from his.

Just do it. Lean forward. His lips are right there. Just give in. You know it’s always going to be him.

Do it.

But you don’t, and neither does he, instead breathing out a heavy sigh, pulling away from you, and unwrapping your grip from his wrist.

“I can’t be your second anymore, y/n.”

“You’re not.” Just say it. Admit it. Fucking do it.

“I am, though. If I wasn’t, you wouldn’t hesitate. You wouldn’t look at me with all that fear in your eyes. Tell me, do you hesitate with him?”

You don’t respond, trying to find the best answer.

“Your silence is so loud, y/n.” He backs away from you, heading upstairs to your room to grab the extra blankets and pillows you’d usually have on standby for when he’d stay over. He walks back into the living room, ignoring your hurt expression.

“I’ll sleep on the couch and be out before you wake up.”

“Jungkook…”

“Stop, y/n. Just…end it there, okay?” you want to run to him, kiss him, tell him he’s number one. He will always be number one. Yoongi is nothing compared to him. You should. You should move your feet right now.

But you don’t.

You hesitate.

And instead, he sets up the bedding on the couch before looking at you again.

“Goodnight.” He turns off the living room light, covering the area in complete darkness as he lays down on the couch.

You sniffle, muttering a quiet apology before slinking away to the stairs to your room. Once the door is closed, you close your eyes and take a deep breath, screaming internally. You allow yourself five seconds to cry before opening your eyes and staring off into space in an attempt to silence the voices and the pain.

It doesn’t.

They just get louder.

You force yourself into your bathroom to turn on the shower. You watch yourself in the mirror as you slowly shed your clothing, piece by piece, like you’re removing everything that happened today with every fabric. Once you’re in your bra and underwear, you look back in the mirror at the bites and handprints on your hips where Yoongi had gripped you tight at one point.

The painting of the music notes on your thigh.

You feel sick.

You quickly shed the bra and underwear, throwing them in the trash before showering. You grab your body wash, squeezing out more than needed onto your loofah and scrubbing away at your skin.

You cry out in pain, not realizing you’re scrubbing yourself raw, trying to get the feeling of Yoongi off your skin. Anywhere he touched, breathed, or kissed suddenly felt like acid, and you needed it off you. You stay in the scalding hot shower for thirty minutes, trying to get him off your skin and out of your hair, muttering curse words the entire time.

When you finally leave the shower, you feel like you are running on autopilot. You change into some clean pajamas, dry your hair, and drag yourself through a quick skin routine, playing some music on your AirPods while doing so.

You sit on your bed, staring at your closed bedroom door. You want to open it and get on the couch with him, cuddle with him like you used to, tell him it’s always him, and just be with him in every way you can.

Stop hesitating.

You throw the blankets off you, forcing yourself out of bed and padding over to the bedroom door, opening it confidently and heading down the stairs.

But you stop halfway.

Your body stills as you listen to him lightly snoring, and you flash to a few weeks ago when he confessed to having trouble sleeping. He wouldn’t say why, he wouldn’t say if it was related to Kai, and he didn’t go any further in his explanation other than it’s hard for him to sleep lately.

So you back away from the doorway, leaving the door open, and crawl back in bed. You won’t be why he can’t get back to sleep just because you need him.

An hour later, you wake up to someone crying. You sit up in bed, rubbing your eyes to get rid of the tears you assume you’re shedding. But there’s nothing there. No tears, just a puffy and tired face.

You listen closer. It can’t be Ryujin. Her door is closed, and she’s out cold. It’s shockingly not you, which means it’s only one other person.

Jungkook?

You throw the blankets off of you, quietly rushing down the stairs and peaking into the living room. He’s on the couch, still asleep but sniffling and whimpering.

You tip-toe over to him as he lays there in his sleep, tears escaping closed eyes and body shaking in fear.

Is this what he was talking about?

Is this every night?

Why didn’t he say anything?

“Jungkook?” You try whispering his name, but he doesn’t respond. You try again, a little louder, and place a hand on his shoulder to gently shake him awake.

Gently, being the keyword.

It apparently wasn’t.

Jungkook wakes up terrified, smacking your hand away from him and cowering back into the couch in fear.

“Koo, it’s okay. It’s me. It’s y/n. I’m sorry. I’m so sor—.”

You’re pulled into a hug before you can finish apologizing, one hand grabbing your arm to pull you to him, the other wrapping around your shoulders. You instinctively crawl onto the couch, curling up with him as he buries his face in your neck, tears streaming down his cheeks as he hyperventilates in your arms.

You hold him as close as you can, your legs wrapped around him, acting as a weighted blanket.

“It’s okay. You’re safe.” You whisper against his temple, wincing a little when the hand gripping your arm finds your back, grasping your shirt. His nails dig into the skin on the back of your neck.

You give him a few more minutes to panic in your arms before easing his face away from your neck, cradling his face in your hands.

“How often has this been happening, Koo?” His eyes close, shaking his head as he tries to bury back into your neck. You stop him, pulling further away.

“Jungkook, talk to me.”

“Almost every night…”

Not again.

“Why didn’t you say anything? To me? To Ryujin?”

He stumbles over a few words, trying to figure out the answer. His hands let go of your shirt before grabbing it again seconds later, as if he has to remind himself he has control and isn’t dreaming anymore.

“It’s nothing.”

“It's not nothing, Jungkook, if you’re having nightmares again every night...”

“They’re not nightmares.”

“No?” You raise an eyebrow, “then what are they?”

“They’re just dreams, y/n.” He shuts down the conversation, and you have no choice but to follow along.

“Fine. Let’s go back to my bed and sleep there, then.”

“I’m fine down here.”

“I don’t care. I want to make sure you’re okay. Can I do that? You do it for Ry and me every day. Let someone else be there for you. Please?”

He lets out a heavy sigh before mumbling in agreement. You disconnect from him, getting off the couch and helping him get up. His eyes meet yours, and your heart cracks at the sight. His eyes are red, eyelids puffy from the tears he never shows. You frown, wrapping his hand in yours, keeping it close as you climb the stairs to your room.

He lets go of your hand as you both crawl into your bed, laying on your back to let him curl up against you. His face finds its way back between your neck and shoulder, and you can’t help the goosebumps that appear all over your body from his breath on your skin.

Neither of you say anything. Probably for the best.

You fall asleep in that position, Jungkook’s tattooed fingers mindlessly dancing along the side of your waist over your shirt. One hand tangled in his hair, softly massaging his head while your other hand rests on his forearm draped across your stomach.

For just a moment, you forget everything that’s wrong with this. For just a moment, it’s back before everything went to shit, and this was enough for both of you.

When you wake up the next morning, which was really a few hours later, you’re still in the same position. The only difference is Jungkook’s legs have tangled up with yours, and his hand found a way under your shirt, lightly holding onto your side. His touch feels scalding hot against your skin. The breathing on your neck gives you goosebumps. Your hands are still in the same position.

You’re about to wake him up when there’s a soft knock on the door before it slowly opens.

Ryujin enters quietly; her eyes cast to the ground like a child knowing she’s in trouble. You know that look all too well. It’s the same look Jungkook gave when he accidentally broke the bottle of one of your more expensive paints, letting it spill all over the floor.

Big round brown eyes, like a puppy pleading its innocence.

When she looks up, her eyes widen at seeing her brother wrapped around your body. She shoots you a questioning look, and you have no choice but to quietly whisper nightmare in hopes she doesn’t get it confused.

Her face softens with a frown at the realization of the word.

“That’s supposed to be my job…I’m supposed to be there for him when it happens.”

You sigh, your hand moving from his hair.

“We’re all still trying to figure this out, Ry. Don’t take it personally.”

“I’m not… I’m… I’m not. I just feel like I failed him. Like I failed you…”

“You’re not failing any—” You cut yourself off when Jungkook’s head moves, pressing his face even closer to your neck for a moment before his eyes open.

“Who are you talking to?” He mumbles, still half asleep. His voice is low and husky and it kills you that you have to ignore it, as well as ignore the way his hand squeezes your side as he readjusts to get comfortable.

“Ryujin’s here…”

He lifts his head to look around the room, tired eyes landing on his sister. His fingers dig into your side momentarily as the siblings make eye contact. Jungkook finally lets go of you, muttering a soft oh, and pulling away from you and out of the bed.

“I’m gonna make breakfast…” he speaks softly, giving his sister a small hug before turning back to you.

“Thank you…for earlier…” you nod in response, not sure what to say to either of them anymore.

When he leaves the room, there’s an awkward silence in the air. Ryujin’s gaze is locked on where her brother was just laying and yours is on her, trying to figure out what’s happening.

And then it hits you.

All the times she’d come over after a fight with another friend, a disagreement with Jungkook, one of the few fights with Kai, or just when all the pressures of life got too much. She’d crawl into your bed just like Jungkook did and wrap her body around yours and fall asleep in your arms.

You called it a Jeon Thing.

You opened your arms up hesitantly, second guessing if that’s what she’s thinking of. But you didn’t have to wait too long before her eyes lit up a little and she’s hurrying to crawl in next to you, replicating the position Jungkook was just in, except her head rests softly on your shoulder and the hand across your stomach is playing with the fabric rather than touching your skin.

You stay completely still, still terrified of her explosions. But they don’t come, instead she sniffles.

“I’m sorry.”

“Hmm?” You have to stay calm. Don’t give in too easily.

“I’m really fucking sorry, y/n”

“Be more specific.” You slow your breathing, making sure you’re not the one that explodes.

But maybe you should.

Ryujin buries her face in your shoulder before speaking.

“For everything. Being horrible to you. Blaming you. Saying the shit that I said…”

That’s it? That’s the apology?

Jungkook’s words from last night loop in your head rapidly, and you’re speaking before you can stop yourself, sitting up and dislodging her, forcing her to sit up facing you.

“You accused me of killing my brother, Ryujin. My brother. The one fucking person I could always count on. The one person in my family that believed in me and encouraged me to do what I wanted to do. You called me a murderer. You said it should’ve been me, Ry. You said you’d rather I have died instead of Kai. You said that about your best friend. Me. Do you hear how fucked up that is?”

Her eyes well up with tears, yours already escaping like a pro, as she fists the blankets in her hands, scared to look up.

“I…I’m sor—”

“Ry, I’m terrified of you. You know that, right? I have to fucking sneak into our apartment. I changed my schedule at school to avoid you. I fucking went to the studio last night because I never want to come home. I stay with Yoongi a few times after group therapy until I think you might be asleep because, as stupid of a decision that is, it hurts less than coming home to my best friend telling me I murdered my fucking brother.”

Ryujin opens her mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. She continues pulling at the fabric of the sheets in front of her as you watch the gears in her mind turn, trying desperately to come up with some form of words.

This was always her weakness. Being told she did wrong, being told she fucked up, and there wasn’t some easy fix. One time in high school, she was so sleep-deprived from studying the night before a midterm, that she mismarked every answer on the scantron, thinking the answers were for the question before. When the teacher told her she had failed, she lost all ability to function, too shocked to speak. You had to talk to the teacher to find out what was wrong, begging him to let her retake it the next day.

But this isn’t high school. This isn’t a test she can just retake. There is no fix for this. The only thing she can do is accept that she fucked up.

The silence is deafening, save for the sound of Jungkook downstairs in your kitchen making food and the morning hustle and bustle outside. She keeps trying to speak, but it’s getting harder and harder for you to tolerate.

“Ry…” she stays frozen. “Ry, look at me.” You grab both of her hands, stopping her from potentially ripping your sheets. When she finally looks up, tears running down her face, you give her a tiny comforting smile.

“I love you, Ryujin. You know I do, and I always will,” you start, and she whispers I love you, too back, smiling through the tears. “Our bond is unbreakable, and you and I both know we will always be there for each other through thick and thin. But this? The things you said? Ry, I can’t just easily forgive you when you say sorry.”

“I…I know. But what do I do? How? How do I fix this?”

“You can’t. That’s the problem. This is something that only time can fix, and I wish that wasn’t the case. But I’m scared of being around you right now, Ry. Even right now, I’m afraid you’ll launch an attack and spew vile accusations at me.”

“No. I won’t. I won’t do that. Ever again.”

You smile, but it falters fast.

“I don’t think it’ll be okay until you take the initiative to get help. Talk to someone, Ry—a professional. And stop drinking so much, eat something, design your pretty dresses again, work on the showcase, and take time for yourself. It sucks, it’s scary, and it sounds miserable, I know. But until you come back to being my Ryujin? I can’t do this with you anymore.”

Her eyes widen, hands gripping yours.

“What does that mean?”

Suddenly it’s hard to look at her. You’ve been sitting on this decision for a while but didn’t think you’d ever have to make it officially.

“I think it might be better for us both if I move out for a bit…”

“…no”

“Ry…” she shakes her head repeatedly. “We need to figure this out separately. I can’t baby you into getting help. And you can’t deal with me and my bullshit while you’re trying to heal. I’ll still be here when you need me. I’ll be here if you need help with your project. I’m not leaving, leaving. I could never leave you. You’re my person.”

“But where are you gonna go?”

“I…don’t know. Maybe the studio?”

“But there’s no shower there.”

Fuck. There isn’t.

“What if you stay with Jungkook?”

Your face heats up at the idea of living with Jungkook, but your stomach drops at the idea of being so close to Kai’s stuff.

“I don’t think I can…”

“He’s miserable, you know.” Her voice softens, and her hands move out from under yours to be the ones holding on this time.

“I think he’s afraid to be alone. He hasn’t talked about Kai unless someone starts the conversation, but he shuts it down fast. He’s so focused on you that I don’t think he’s realized how much help he needs. Maybe staying with him can help.”

“I didn’t ask him to focus on me.” You try not to sound defensive. She knows that, choosing to ignore the tone.

“We both know he didn’t choose to. It’s a part of who he is. You are a part of who he is, no matter what.”

Are you, though? Or is he a part of who you are? He could replace you so easily if you just let him go. You know that. He must know that. Maybe that’s why he wants you to tell him to move on. That you and Yoongi are a thing.

He wants to replace you with anyone who makes him less sad.

Anyone but you.

“Hey,” Ryujin’s voice cuts through your thoughts, your eyes looking up at her in a panic. “I see where your mind is right now. Stop whatever it is you’re thinking.”

“But—”

“I don’t care. Whatever you’re telling yourself to make yourself think he wouldn’t want to have you by his side every moment of every day is a lie, and you know it.”

You don’t respond, mind running a mile a second, and all you want to do is go back to sleep.

“I…I understand if you feel you need to move out and get some space from me temporarily. I would never hold that against you, y/n. But please go with someone I know so I can know you’re okay. What even is a Yoongi?”

Your body freezes at his name. Of course she doesn’t know Yoongi. Of course she doesn’t know you’re sleeping with someone from group therapy. Of course she doesn’t know you went to the studio with him last night and fucked on your couch while you only thought about Jungkook.

“A mistake. I think…” your gaze stays focused on Ryujin’s hands holding yours, eyes burning from the tears threatening to return for the nth time.

“Y/n…you’re doing it again, aren’t you?” She’s careful not to sound judgmental, but you can still feel it.

“No. No. I’m…I’m not.” You shake your head, shutting your eyes tight. “I’m trying not to. It’s just sex. But last night…I fucked up. And then you called. And then we argued. And then Jungkook…”

She stays silent, and it drives you crazy that you can’t read her mind.

“I’m gonna end it with him. Whatever it is. I can’t…keep doing this. I’m tired, Ry. I’m so fucking tired.”

“I know, babes. And I know a good amount of it is my fault, and I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you.”

You try to speak, but nothing comes out as her thumbs rub back and forth on the back of your hands just like Jungkook was doing last night.

“What if I temporarily move out instead? You stay here. I’ll stay with Jungkook and stay in Kai’s room. You can stay here and try to heal on your own terms. It’ll be less stressful for you. You don’t always have to be the one making changes to your life for others, y/n. Let us make changes instead.”

You finally look up at her. Both of you have tear-stained faces, but she’s holding a smile that breaks your heart.

“Ry…”

“I’m doing it. I’ve decided.”

You smile back at her briefly.

“Are you sure you’re even ready to go in his room? I went to his studio last night and couldn’t breathe.”

She pauses momentarily, eyes on the ceiling as she thinks.

“I think…I think I’m ready. I mean… No one will ever be with something like this, right? It’s always going to be scary. It’s always going to hurt. Even the smallest task will sometimes feel like a punch in the gut, right?” She takes a deep breath, seeing you smile again.

“I miss him. I think being around his stuff can help me.” she quietly speaks.

“Yeah?”

She smiles, nodding. There’s something in her expression that is still broken. Something you must not know about. But you don’t question it. Everyone has their secrets. You tell yourself that she’ll talk about it when she’s ready..

She doesn’t let you try to dissuade her, instead getting off your bed and dragging you to the kitchen where Jungkook has put together a full breakfast.

He turns to you both, eyes widening at your hand in hers before looking at you.

“Everything good?” He asks slowly. You nod silently, letting go of her hand to grab a plate and scoot past him to pile some pancakes on with some eggs.

“Hopefully soon, yes,” Ryujin answers for you, looking nervously at her brother. “But I’m moving in with you for a bit. Until we figure out how to be, I guess…” she copies your moves, grabbing a plate and scooting past her befuddled brother.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“She wanted to move out to put some space between us. I offered instead. I’m going to stay in Kai’s room…”

“But…” he starts, but you interrupt.

“But we haven’t gone in there yet. We’re gonna do that tomorrow morning. If you want to join, we can do it together. Maybe it’ll help you, too.”

“Yeah, JK. Y/n said you’ve been having nightmares again. And I know you’ve been sleeping on our couch more than your bed. Maybe having someone else there can help you?”

Jungkook stares at you both, sitting on opposite sides of the table with the same amount of food on your plates. Neither looking at him. Both making decisions without him. He grips the counter with both hands, pushing down every emotion. You almost miss it when you look up.

“Jungkook? Are you okay?” You move to get up, but you hesitate, again, when he closes his eyes and nods.

“I’m fine.”

Liar.

“Don’t you have group therapy tomorrow morning?” He changes the subject back to you, an easy task for him. It’s easier to focus on you, Ryujin, school, work, anything and everything but himself.

Your eyes drop back down to your food, pushing it around.

“I’m not going.” You state, hoping he doesn’t question it further.

But of course, it’s Jungkook.

“Why not?”

Your chest tightens, your throat closing in on itself. When did it get so hot? Are you sweating? Is that your heart or your brain pounding?

“I don’t feel like going.” You try sounding confident, but your voice shakes, betraying you.

“Y/n.” Your eyes meet his, begging him to drop it.

“Jungkook, if she doesn’t want to go, she’s not going. Let her make decisions for herself.”

“I’m not telling her what to do, Ry. I’m trying to help her.”

“Sounds like the same thing.”

Both of you, stop. Please.

“It’s not, though. If she wants to learn to grieve and move on in her own way, that’s what she’ll do. You can’t control her.”

“Well, obviously, but—”

Snap.

Your fist slams down on the table, dishes rattling and silencing the room.

“Please stop! Both of you. Stop talking about me like I’m not here. I’m right fucking here. Right here.”

You’re so tired of crying, of feeling. It’s exhausting. Every single little thing makes you want to cry. It’s ridiculous.

“Jungkook, I’m not going. I’ll go to the next one, and I still have my regular appointment with Dr. Adams on Monday. But I’d rather help Ry, okay?” You wait for him to nod in understanding before turning to his sister.

“And Ry. He is trying to help. He’s been pushing me to do what I want to avoid, and I appreciate it. I’d still be curled up in my room if it wasn’t for him. So if he has to be pushy, it’s for a reason. Leave it.”

She nods, and everything goes silent.

This is why you need space.

This is suffocating.

“I have to get ready for class. I have to head back to the studio and pick up my canvas, so I need to leave in twenty minutes…” you get up from the table, rinsing the plate before placing it in the dishwasher.

“Thank you for breakfast, Koo. It was delicious.” You try walking past him, but a hand lands on your stomach, preventing you from leaving.

“Do you want a ride? You seemed more or less okay with it last night.”

You should say no. You want to distance yourself from everyone right now. You need to distance yourself. Everything is happening all at once, and you should say no, walk to the studio, and walk to campus.

But it was easier being in a car with him.

But you should say no anyway.

“Okay…I’ll get ready quickly.” You whisper, walking past him when his hand moves.

You hear the two of them whisper as you climb the stairs, but you’re too tired to care, so you slink back to your room. You grab your phone to charge it while you get ready, ignoring the notifications glaring at you as you plug it in and walk away.

When it’s time to leave, Ryujin is already back in her room, making a list of things to bring to Jungkook’s while he’s sitting on the couch, keys in hand.

The walk to his car is quiet. Getting in is just as silent, but he repeats the night before, grabbing your hand in his and holding it close to his chest through every intersection it takes to get to the studio. When he parks in his usual spot, his squeeze tightens on you, head lolling back against the headrest.

He looks nervous. He feels nervous. His hand is getting sweaty while his grip switches between a death grip and shaking, barely holding on.

“Jungkook?” You inquire softly, waiting for him to give some sign that he's okay. “Do you wanna come in?”

He exhales a small breath, shaking his head.

“I don’t think I can.”

You shift in your seat, removing your seatbelt and grabbing the hand wrapped around yours. His eyes find yours, and you’re right. He’s scared.

Is this how you looked last night?

“I’m not gonna lie to you, Koo. It sucks. The second you step into the studio, you’re back at the moments before finals. You go into his studio, and you fully expect him to be in there working his ass off on whatever assignment he has. But he’s not. And it’s like having to relive that night all over again. And it fucking sucks.” You sniffle, playing with his tattooed hand.

“And I know the last thing you want me to do right now is mention Yoongi,” he groans out a small laugh, and the corner of your lips twitch into a smirk, “but he made a good point, Koo. The longer you hold off on doing this, on going into the rooms, reliving the memories with him, talking about him, the more it’s going to hurt you.”

He sighs, closing his eyes. “I’m going to pretend he didn’t say that and that it’s just you being all wise.”

“Well, I am all wise. We’ve established this many times.” You both grin, enjoying the brief moment of normalcy before he agrees to go in with you. His hand never leaves yours, but this time you’re the one rubbing your thumb on the back of his hand.

When you both reach the the front door, you unlock it, letting go of his hand. You give him a second before he opens the door fully, letting him step inside first.

You watch him from the front door as he stands in the middle of the living area, eyes scanning every inch of the room. When he turns back around, facing you, his eyes cast to his studio room.

You can’t decipher the look on his face.

He’s so good at pretending to be okay that it makes it impossible to read him sometimes. He looks as if he’s dazed; his mind is far away from the studio to somewhere you don’t know.

“You good?” You hesitantly ask, taking two steps closer to him.

He blinks a few times, eyes finding your worried expression before offering a small smile.

“I’m okay. I need to get something from my room. A lens I need for class.”

“Oh. Okay.” You nod, expecting him to move, but he’s standing perfectly still. “Well, I’m going to get my canvas and clean up really quickly since I left abruptly last night…” you quietly walk to your room, turning to see him finally at his door, fingers hesitating over the pin pad before finally putting in the number and walking in.

You enter your room, your canvas still leaning against your old ones. Black and white still. Paints dried up on the palette, and brushes stiff as a result. You dump the brushes into a jar of water and the palette onto the desk, making a mental note to return later tonight to clean up correctly. You swear you see a hint of purple as you put the canvas in a tote after ensuring it was dry.

You turn and are greeted by the cat painting Yoongi was obsessed with. Should you still give it to him? Even if you plan on ending things? You don’t want it, and it would look good in a cat cafe. If anything, you could give it to the cafe directly.

God, you don’t want to talk to Yoongi. But you don’t want to ghost him completely. And before the sex, he was actually starting to be a good friend and an excellent partner in helping each other through your traumas.

You look at the couch, resisting the urge to deep clean every inch of it. Maybe a new couch. One that won’t make you feel dirty and wrong every time you look at it.

You have to apologize. And you have to cut ties with him.

You have to.

You’re just going to hurt him in the end.

You’re so good at hurting people.

You hear the beeping of a keypad, turning your head to the doorway before grabbing your tote, setting the cat painting aside, and leaving your room.

Kai’s door is open.

“Jungkook?” You softly call out, leaving the tote on the couch in the living area. You call out his name again, slowly approaching your brother’s room. Your heart breaks at the sight.

Jungkook’s sitting on the small couch with his knees pressed to his chest and his arms around his shins. His head is buried in between his knees, but he’s silent.

“Koo?” You try again, slowly approaching, moving some of Kai’s scattered papers out of the way, and sitting next to him.

When he still doesn’t respond, you stop trying. You’ll sit and wait by his side, ready to be there for whatever he needs.

The most important rule in helping someone grieve: never push them to grieve how you think they should. Just be there when they’re ready.

A mantra of sorts drilled into your brain in group therapy.

His body finally moves, his back rising suddenly as he takes a deep breath before slowly letting it out and raising his head. He doesn’t look at you, instead looking at the room he’s in. The same way you did the night before.

His face is flush, like he was forcing himself to hold his breath. His eyes are dry, and he looks exhausted.

“How did it go last night, coming in here?” He finally asks, head leaning back to rest on the couch.

You flatten your hands on the couch, sliding them back and forth to feel the texture. It’s a nice distraction to keep your hands apart and not claw at your skin.

“I had a full blown panic attack. Felt like I was dying. Like my brain was on the verge of exploding, and I kept hearing voices screaming, and I couldn’t see.” You let out a nervous laugh, keeping your eyes on the couch.

“Voices?”

“Uh…yeah. Like, like my own thoughts, but amplified. I don’t know how to explain it…I’d rather not try, honestly.”

“You don’t have to.” He whispers, a hand stopping one of yours and softly holding onto it.

“How’d you get through it?”

“Jungkook…”

“What?”

“Stop…doing that.”

“Stop doing what?”

“Diverting. You already know the answer. When I say Yoongi got me through it, you’re going to say something about how I feel about him, and then we’ll fight. You know it’s always going to be you in the end. I don’t understand why you keep saying it’s so one-sided when it’s clearly not. It’s just messy and complicated right now, okay? I don’t want to have that scene play out again. Specifically not here.”

He doesn’t respond, instead, staring at your hand in his, his thumb running over your ring finger. Your eyes flick up to his face, jaw clenched tight and eyes sad. There’s no sparkle in them like there usually is, and you’re not sure how long they’ve been so dull.

How have you not noticed that?

“Have you allowed yourself to cry yet?” You hesitate to ask, but you have to. It’s been months since Kai passed, and you haven’t seen him cry since the crash or last night in his sleep. You want to be wrong. Please let him tell you you’re wrong.

“No.” His voice cracks as he shakes your head, and you can feel your heart drop with it.

“Koo. You have to let it out at some point. Or else you’ll be stuck and have those nightmares forever.”

You turn your body to face him better, bringing your entwined hands to your lap.

“I’m scared.” He shuts his eyes tight.

“Scared of what?”

“If I cry, I’m scared I’ll never stop.”

“Koo…”

And that’s all it takes for the dam to break, tears streaming down his face as he begins to sob. He buries his head back into his knees and lets the floodgates open. You do nothing. You don’t want to. You want him to finally let it out and focus on himself and his own grief.

So you sit.

And you wait. His hand stays in yours as he finally lets go of months of emotional trauma, stress, and fears.

You’ve only seen Jungkook cry like this once. It was after his parents divorced just before he graduated high school. He had so much going on, from finishing up high school to getting accepted to the same school as you and Ryujin. He had finals, projects, an internship, a part-time job, and a social life.

All at the same time as he watched his parents argue, his mother packing up her stuff and moving out the day after his graduation. It became too overwhelming for him. He pushed everything down as far as he could and pretended he was fine.

But you could see it in his eyes. Just like now, that sparkle was gone. He barely spoke, and if he did, it was about anyone else. He just focused on finishing the day and praying no one talked to him the entire time.

Until one day, you both went to a street fair to celebrate high school being over. There were a few booths with carnival games and one that let you break plates. You dragged him over, encouraging him to destroy some ceramic dinnerware and let it all out. He did, but after breaking a good handful of plates, it was as if something in him snapped.

You rushed him out of the booth, taking him to a darkened alley to fully cry in peace. He hated crying in front of others. He hated the idea of people perceiving him as weak. You’ve told him many times it doesn’t, but you still take him somewhere quiet and safe when you know he’s upset.

He cried in your arms in that alley for thirty minutes, finally letting you take him home and having him fall asleep in your arms.

You’re pulled from the memory when Jungkook’s hand pulls yours closer. You shift on the couch, wrapping your arms around him as he curls into your side. His tear stained face finds its home in the space between your neck and shoulder, his hands tightly grabbing at any part of you he can like you’re his lifeline.

In a way, you are, to him at least.

Just like he’s yours.

He cries in your arms for what feels like fifteen minutes, random words stumbling out of his sobs, followed by questions that will never get answered and wishes that will never be granted. You continue to stay silent, only ever whispering that he’s okay, he’s safe, and to let it out. Every now and again kissing the top of his head when he grew silent, clutching him harder when the sobs returned stronger.

Somewhere in the living room, your phone rings. You ignore it.

Not right now.

It rings again. You bury your face in Jungkook’s messy curls, focusing on the smell of his conditioner instead.

Please stop.

On the third call, Jungkook lifts his face from your neck just enough to look at you.

“You should get that.” His voice is a hoarse whisper. Your hand softly cradles his cheek as you shake your head.

“Nah. My top priority right now is making sure you’re okay.”

He smiles. It’s broken and weak, but it’s there as he pulls away from you, sitting up straight and rubbing his hands across his puffy face.

“I’m okay.” He mumbles behind his hands, “I’m puffy and probably need to rehydrate. But I’m okay.”

“We can wrap an ice pack in a towel to reduce the puffiness. And there’s water in the fridge, I’m sure.” You mimic how he sits, brushing some of his hair out of his face.

“Mmm. We should do a spa day. Once you and Ry are a little better, that is.”

“I look forward to it. Full on facemasks and mani/pedis.” It's a soft whisper. You do genuinely hope there will be a time when you three can go back to normal. Or as normal as you can without your brother.

“You sure you’re okay, Koo?” He nods, but you shake your head. “I need you to promise me you’ll stop blocking everything out. We’re all hurting. We’re all scared of a future without him. We’re all going through this together. You don’t have to always try to be the big brave hero.”

“But then what am I? I feel like I need to be something or do something so I’m not…so I don’t—”

“Remember that he’s gone?”

He’s silent for a moment, eyes dancing around his best friend’s studio where he’s spent countless hours pacing the floor while Kai was at his desk or on the couch talking about complete nonsense, complaining about Ryujin or ranting about your latest relationship failures.

“Yeah…” his head drops, eyes falling to the floor in defeat. “I just want to forget. Focusing on anything else helps with that.” You stop yourself from reaching out to touch him again, instead placing both your hands on your lap, twiddling your fingers in place.

“Jungkook?” You tilt your head to the side, eyebrows knit together as you focus on your hands, carefully forming the words in your brain before speaking again.

“Kai’s gone. He died. I was there. I held his hand as he died. So, I understand wanting to forget that he’s gone and distracting yourself from remembering. But I relive that moment every day. I don’t have that same luxury you do of being able to forget. I wake up every morning thinking this is a sick nightmare and that he’ll be on the couch or in the kitchen stealing our food. But then he’s not. And I have to remember what it felt like to hold his hand for the last time. I have to remember watching them take his body away.”

You don’t even realize you’re crying until the feeling of Jungkook’s hands holding yours makes you flinch, causing the tears to fall on them.

“So please, please, understand what I’m saying when I say how lucky you are that you have that option to forget, but also how ridiculous and rude it is to Kai to want to forget that he’s gone.”

“Y/n…that’s…I would nev—”

“He was your best friend, Jungkook. He always will be in a way. He would've been your brother-in-law once he and Ry got married. Don’t do that disservice to your best friend by trying to forget that he died. Forget the fights, forget the disagreements and all the bad moments you had with him. That’s fine. But don’t forget Kai, okay?”

He remains silent, lips shut tight, and eyes watering again. But he nods, squeezing your hands with his as a quiet okay escapes his lips.

Your phone rings a fourth time, and you groan, letting go of Jungkook’s hands and getting up. You stomp over to your phone and glare at the screen.

Mother (7) Missed Call

Mother (12) Text Message

Father (1) Text Message

Yoongi (3) Text Message

You put your phone on silent, slipping it into your backpack all the way at the bottom.

The door to Kai’s room closes, and Jungkook appears behind you.

“Was that Yoongi?” His voice carries no negative tone for once, no malice or anger. You shake your head, picking up the canvas tote that’s quickly taken away from you by Jungkook.

“My mother…” your voice trails as you watch him walk towards the front door. He grimaces in your direction when your feet finally catch up to him.

“Gross.” He steps out of the studio, letting you lock the door. You both silently head down the elevator and back to his car, where he waits until you both have your seatbelts on and your hand is back in his when he pulls out of the parking space.

“What does she want now?”

“I don’t know. I don’t want to know. Probably asking when I’m gonna come back home and get a real job now that they’re left with the lesser child.” You scoff, eyes on the road.

“That or she already wants me to make plans for Christmas. Which I don’t want to think about at all.”

Jungkook smirks, bringing your hand to his chest at a stop light. It takes you a second until you realize you’ve made it several blocks without your heart rate skyrocketing. Your eyes have been watching every car just like last night, but it feels less stressful.

Because it’s him. It’s always him.

“Why is it always you?”

“Hmm?” The light turns green, and he steps on the gas. The feeling of panic is still there. But you’re able to push it back down. You don’t say anything, and he doesn’t question you further as he pulls into the school’s parking lot.

He exits the car first, helping you out next and putting your canvas tote on his shoulder. His hand finds yours again as you both walk to the art building in silence.

“So when do I get to see the painting?” He questions, handing you the tote.

“At the showcase.” You smile at his pout.

“But that's months away.”

“Exactly. I don’t think I want anyone important to see any of it until then. It’s hard enough that I can’t see the colors right now. I don’t need other people seeing whatever mess I’ve made.”

“I’m sure it’s beautiful. Just like everything you create.” His hand squeezes yours, and you smile at the feel of his hand wrapped around yours. Your safety blanket.

“I can’t wait to see your showcase next year. It’s gonna be great. You should use that one photo you took when we all went on that hike and saw all those stars.” You grin, the memory is still so bright and real in your mind. The meteor shower you wanted to see so badly that you convinced the three of them to hike up a mountain with you just to see it.

“You and that damn mountain. You bamboozled us.” Jungkook groans.

“Excuse me. You said you had fun and would do it again!”

“Only if you wanted to. And had a better reason. And without Ryujin. She complained the entire time. Even Kai was getting annoyed.”

“Okay. We’ll go back, just the two of us, the next time there’s a good meteor shower.”

“It’s a date.”

You nod, but don’t respond. That phrase suddenly has such a bigger meaning than it did before. Instead, you focus on climbing the stairs to the third floor and approaching your classroom. His voice eventually breaks you out of your racing thoughts.

“Do you want a ride home tonight?”

“I need to actually clean my brushes from last night. So I’ll be at the studio. Besides, isn’t your last class later than mine?”

“Fair. I can come get you after? Or bring food?” Your silence makes him panic, “or not. I just hate the idea of you out on your own so late…that’s all. I’m not trying to control you or anything.”

“No, no. I get it. Yeah. Come by after class. That’s fine. I just. I don’t know. Sorry.” You shake your head, gripping the straps to the tote. Confused, Jungkook opens his mouth to ask you to clarify what you’re saying, but the sound of his and your name from down the hall stops him.

Your eyes find the source of the shout and land on Joshua and Jimin. Joshua glances down to your hand in Jungkook’s before shooting you a smirk. You let go out of instinct and readjust your grasp on your tote with both hands and avoid how Jungkook looks at you.

“Hey, Jimin. How’s your second to last year so far?” You smile at him. His face flashes from confusion towards Jungkook to the same friendly smile you have towards him.

“It’s great! Frustrating moments when my equipment decides not to function, but that’s expected. How—, uh, how’s your painting?”

You can’t blame him for sounding hesitant. You haven’t seen Jimin since the funeral, and with the way everything that happened that day, you’d be treading lightly too.

“It’s…going. I’m trying to change the way I paint. I’m not excited about the showcase, though.”

“Oh, yeah. Taehyung’s been going on about it. You two have a lot to do, huh?” You smile at the mention of his boyfriend, missing the nights you’d invite them out to drink with the rest of the sQuad.

“Yeah. I’m not sure how to get it all done in time. But I can’t wait to see what Taehyung does.”

He smiles in return, and it’s suddenly awkward. You don’t know what you’re supposed to say next. Jimin looks just as lost, and Joshua is on his phone. Jungkook sniffs for the sake of making a noise.

“We should go out to that karaoke bar again soon.” His voice breaks the silence, the three of you looking up at him.

“I think that’s a great idea.” Joshua chimes in, “but first, we have a class that starts in forty-five seconds. See ya, friends.” He grabs your wrist, spinning you around in the direction of the classroom, dragging you with him.

“Shua, class starts in ten minutes. Not forty-five seconds.” You whine as he sits you down in your seat, sitting next to you after going across the room and coming back with two blank canvases, setting one on his easel and the other on yours.

“I know. But I needed to get you away from Jungkook so you could tell me why y’all were holding hands.” He grins, turning to face you once his stuff is set up.

“This isn’t elementary school, Joshua. We can hold hands without it being anything.” You glare at him, slowly pulling your tools out of your bag, and placing them neatly on the table next to your easel. You grab a second easel, a much smaller one, and place it next to the big window.

“While that is true, y/n, it’s you and Jungkook. Everything either of you do with one another means something. Always has been, always will.”

You look down at your canvas tote with a frown. He’s not wrong. That’s how you two are. Every action, every sentence, every thought. It all means something. Even if that something is meaningless to others, it’s the world to you both.

“I guess…” you sigh, opening the tote and pulling out your canvas. Suddenly very hyper aware others can see it as you set it down on the easel by the window.

“Oh, holy shit, that’s beautiful, y/n.” Joshua says, standing up to look closer, “the colors are stunning.”

“Are they…?” You squint at the painting. Some colors are just barely visible. You see the purple a little stronger, and a bit of what you think is yellow? You’re still not sure.

“Yeah, the way you blended the green with the—”

“No! Don’t tell me. I wanna wait.”

“Wait for what?”

“For when I can see the colors again.” You grin, actually feeling hopeful for once. Joshua smiles back, patting your shoulder and sitting back down. Before Joshua can question further, Professor Varon walks in exactly as class is set to begin.

“Okay, everyone! Let’s get to it! The first week is done, and now down to serious business!”

The class goes by so fast you’re not even sure you registered any information in your brain. You spent too much time glancing between the professor and your finished painting. At one point, while walking the room, he stopped by you, eyes on the finished piece as he asked you to stay after class.

Joshua packs up his stuff, saying goodbye to you with the promise of getting together for clothes shopping in a week or two. Professor Varon makes his way to your seat next to the big window once everyone is out.

“So, how was the process?”

“The what?” You look up at him, his eyes still on the painting. “Oh. Uh, shit? Yesterday after I left I went to our shared studio for the first time…”

How was that only yesterday?

“And how’d that go? Being in a place you used to spend a lot of time with him in?”

“Horribly?” You let out an exasperated laugh, “I went in his room, had a panic attack, made a horrible decision, woke up, sat in his room talking to nothing, and then finished the painting.” He gives it a beat of silence before he smiles.

“So it sounds like it went pretty well.” You both laugh as you slowly put your stuff away.

“I guess so. It felt good painting…I just kinda zoned out for a few hours, and when I came back, it was done more or less.”

“And what about the colors?”

“Joshua said there was green in it. I can kind of see purple, and I think there’s yellow. But I’ve decided to stop straining to see it.”

“That’s a good idea,” he smiles at you, “just keep painting, y/n. You’ll see it again.”

“Thank you…I’m trying.”

“That’s all you can do sometimes.” He shrugs, walking back to his desk as you put the canvases back in your tote. “And put that one in your showcase. Everyone should see it.”

Hope you enjoyed it, let me know what you think, any ideas on where it’s going or any questions. The next chapter is Ryujin’s POV and oh boy is that not gonna be fun to write. 😖

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