#like ‘i wish i could fly i’d pick you up and we’d go back in time’

[zukkaoru]

tell me five of your favorite songs? (and if you get this ask also send it to 5 other of your mutuals :)) )

okay i'm only going with one per artist and uhh also i'm bad at picking favorites. so i just went with my first instinct

the last one - maisie peters

the very first night - taylor swift

drive - the lightning thief musical

godlight - noah kahan

hope ur ok - olivia rodrigo

[brodygold]

A Game For Bros

Nate and I had always been the same: two nerds, caught up in our own world of video games, D&D, and sci-fi movies. He’d been my best friend since high school, a skinny guy with messy brown hair, always wearing some oversized t-shirt of a superhero. Me? I wasn’t much different. Shorter, stockier, and always in retro game tees. We never got into sports—couldn’t care less, really. But that Saturday, when Nate invited me over to check out a new game, we did something a bit out of our comfort zone.

“I don’t usually go for sports games,” I said as I plopped onto his worn-out couch. The game case for The Golden Army: Rise of Champions sat on the coffee table, glowing in a strange golden light. “What made you pick this one?”

Nate shrugged as he plugged in the system. “The reviews were insane, man. People say it’s super immersive, like you actually feel the game.”

“Sounds cool enough,” I muttered, grabbing a soda. “Let’s see what it’s about.”

Nate’s apartment looked the same as always—cluttered with comic books, action figures, and old consoles. The screen flashed on, bathing the room in golden light as the title appeared: The Golden Army: Rise of Champions. The graphics were sharp, but what immediately caught my attention was how detailed the avatar customization was. We both laughed as we started making characters that were basically us but... stronger, taller, more athletic.

“Man, I wish I was this ripped in real life,” I said, chuckling as I bulked up my avatar.

Nate nodded, not looking up from his controller. “Same here, dude. If only, right?”

Once the game started, though, things got weird fast. It wasn’t like any sports game I’d ever played. It was too smooth, too real. Every movement of my character felt like it was coming from me, like my body was somehow connected to the screen. Nate was feeling it too; I could tell by how focused he’d gotten.

“This feels insane,” I muttered, my fingers flying over the controller as my avatar sprinted down the field. My skin tingled, and for a second, I thought it was just adrenaline from getting into the game.

“Yeah, it’s like... I can *feel* it,” Nate said, his voice lower, more serious than usual.

What I didn’t realize was that I really *was* feeling it. I was changing. My arms, once stocky but kind of soft, were slowly growing harder, leaner, and stronger. My biceps pushed against the fabric of my t-shirt, but I didn’t notice at first. I was too absorbed in the game. Nate wasn’t paying attention either, but he was changing too. His scrawny arms were swelling, his chest growing more defined, the lines of muscle slowly becoming visible under his shirt.

My legs were thickening, my calves bulging as they hardened. Nate’s shoulders broadened as his posture straightened, more relaxed, confident. His shaggy hair started to shift, styling itself into something neater and more athletic. It suited him.

Our avatar dominated the field. Every pass, every kick felt like it was coming straight from us. By the time the match ended, I noticed my t-shirt was stretched tight against my chest, clinging to muscles I didn’t remember having. But it felt normal. Like I’d always been this way. Nate was the same. His shirt had morphed into something sleeker, a fitted gold soccer jersey. I looked down, realizing mine had changed too. I wasn’t in my retro game tee anymore—I was in a gold jersey too, my name stitched across the back.

But we didn’t freak out. We didn’t question it. Why would we? We’d always been jocks, right? That’s how we met in the first place.

“Yo, that was sick, bro!” I grinned at Nate, flexing my now-defined arms. “We totally crushed that game.”

Nate smirked, his voice deeper now, his body lean and athletic. “Hell yeah, man. No one can take us down.”

The room around us had changed too, though we didn’t notice with how invested in the game we were. Gone were the stacks of comics and games. Instead, soccer trophies lined the shelves, photos of us in our golden jerseys, posing as champions of The Golden Army. It was as if our old lives had been erased, replaced entirely by something new.

As we kept playing, our minds continued to shift. I didn’t care about D&D or sci-fi movies anymore. All I could think about was training, getting stronger, being the best. Nate, once shy and quiet, was now exuding confidence. We were athletes, teammates, brothers on and off the field.

Our bodies had finished transforming. I looked over at Nate, admiring how ripped he was now. His short hair was clean, his jawline sharp. He looked... good. Really good. The thought lingered longer than it should have, but I didn’t push it away. Why would I? We’d always been close, but now there was something else there, something that had shifted between us.

I felt my heart race as I caught him looking at me the same way, his eyes lingering on my chest, my arms. The air between us felt electric, like something was pulling us together.

“Yo, Nate,” I started, feeling my pulse quicken. “You ever feel like... there’s more between us than just the game?”

Nate turned to me, his eyes locked on mine, and for a moment, the room was silent. Then he smirked, but there was something softer in his gaze. “Yeah, bro. I’ve been feeling that too.”

It happened without thinking. I reached out, grabbing his hand, and suddenly, I was pulling him closer. Our eyes met, and before I could stop myself, I kissed him. His lips were warm, firm, and everything clicked into place. It was like this was always meant to happen. Like this was who we were supposed to be.

When we finally pulled away, both of us were breathing hard. Nate looked at me, his grin returning. “Damn, bro. That was... intense.”

“Yeah,” I replied, still catching my breath. “But I think we’ve always had this, right? Just took us a while to figure it out.”

Nate nodded, his hand still on my chest, his thumb brushing against the fabric of my jersey. “Always. And now? We’ve got everything we need.”

We leaned in again, and this time, it felt even more right. We were no longer the nerdy duo, lost in games and fantasy worlds. We were champions—alpha jocks, leaders of The Golden Army—and we had found each other. As I held Nate close, our golden jerseys shining in the light, I knew that everything was just how it should be.

“Now how about round 2, bro?”

“Oh, you’re so on bro!”

[gh0stsp1d3r]

Maybanks sister

Series masterlist , previous chapter

Taglist- @cassie0sstuff @rafesgiirl @fals3-g0d @tiaamberxx @callsignwidow

Part 2, Chapter 2- a not so fun sleepover

Summary: it is just your luck at this point. You and Kiara get caught by some weird people in the Barbados after finally getting off ‘poguelandia.’ You’re trapped with your psycho ex. Again. For a second time.

After what felt like a year, finally, someone had come to rescue you guys.

Now, you guys had been saved. You were thankful for whoever this dude was for picking you guys up, thankful to get off this damn island already.

“I got a little guide out in Saint Vincent. I was spotting fish.” He told you guys as you sat down in his plane.

“What were you spotting?” You asked the man, curious.

“You know, the usual. Wahoo.”

You quirked an eyebrow, JJ also seemed confused as he turned to you.

“Wahoo? In September?” You whispered to JJ. He had the same confused look.

“That doesn’t make sense.” He whispered back.

“I’d hang on to something. Gets a little spicy on takeoff.”

“Wahoo doesn’t run in September. Like ever.” You told them all quietly. “Kinda wish it did, cause then we’d have been eating it…��� you trailed off. “It tastes so good.”

“Yeah. So whoever this dude is, he’s not a fisherman.” JJ spoke.

“Maybe the run just starts earlier out here.” Pope shrugged.

You tilted your head to the side. “In the carribean? Unlikely. They usually-“

“No, I know what this is. He’s working for my dad. And he’s probably been looking for us the entire time.” Sarah cut you off, everyone turning to her now.

“All right, we gotta find out.” JJ said. “Just gotta look for clues…”

You tapped on JJs shoulder, and pointed to a bag on the back of his seat.

“Hey, Jimmy.” John B spoke, distracting the man while JJ slowly reached for the bag, taking it and rummaging through everything. He opened a book and found a picture, a picture of the coastal venture.

He handed it to Sarah.

“So he was looking for us?” Cleo said.

“Exactly.”

“He’s working for my dad.”

“I say we all jump off.” You pointed down. The plane shook suddenly, you all grabbing on.

“Hey, yall better hold something we got some unexpected turbulence up here.”

“Guys, whatever it is, it’s happening fast. Look.”

Everyone looked out the window, seeing some land.

“That looks like Barbados. I’ve been there with Terrence.”

“Okay.. there’s 7 of us, one of him. You know my vote, we storm the cockpit.” Jj told everyone.

“Idiot. None of us know how to fly a damn plane.” You hit him in the arm.

“I’ve seen pope fly simulators.”

“Yeah, and I’ve flown the fucking Death Star on Lego Star Wars, doesn’t mean I can fly.” You shrugged.

“Well do you have an idea?” He turned to you.

“Something safe..?”

“Why don’t we just wait until the plane lands somewhere safe, and then we sneak out. And if someone comes to mess with us, we mad dog them.” Pope spoke.

“Yeah. I like that way better.” You nodded.

“I like the mad-dogging part.” Jj tilted his head.

“Just put that back. Put it back. Be cool.” Kiara told JJ, John B distracting him again so JJ could put the stuff back into the bag.

“I’ve been going since I was 18-“ he spoke, and heard a sudden noise. JJ had been caught.

“Hey man! What the hell are you doing?” He turned to JJ, slapping him away. “That’s mine! That’s my book, give it back!”

“Fly the plane! Please fly the plane. Please fly the plane.” Sarah said, the plane shaking. You were knocked straight into Cleo who helped you sit back up quickly.

The plane crashed into the water as he struggled to get it up. Everyone screaming as they fell into the back, you all piling on top of each other. The plane filled with water.

“Is everybody good?” You asked them, everyone coughing.

“Jj, wake up, man we gotta get out.” you helped him get up. John B shoved open the door, multiple people coming over.

“Oh no. They don’t look friendly.”

“No, they look very unfriendly!”

“We gotta go, come on.”

They all got out.

“Kie, go!” You told her.

“I’m coming. Go!”

“I’m not leaving until you do.”

“Guys, get out before it sinks!” JJ told you both. Kiara looked at you and back behind you, at the man sinking.

You groaned when she began to swim over, you following.

“Come on, you gotta hurry!”

They all shouted out you both. You helped Kiara get through the plane and unbuckled the man, helping her carry him through the window.

The others were all swimming now.

“Come on guys, hurry up! Hurry up!”

“We got you.” Kiara panted to him, the man unconscious as you both carried him to shore.

“Wait, where are they?” Jj asked, turning around.

“You guys, where the fuck are they?”

“They went the other way.”

You both brought him up to shore, Kiara coughing as you brought her close to you.

“Thank you.” The man told you both, awake now.

“You lied to us. Who are you?” Kiara asked, an Atv interrupting him.

“Oh God. You should get out of here.”

You stood up, helping Kiara up and both of you running away from the men.

“Oh my God. Oh my God.” JJ mumbled, watching.

You both looked around, a car pulling up. You both hid by a boat, before getting caught.

“They’re over here!”

You punched a man square in the face who tried to grab Kiara, sweeping his leg and making him fall before another caught your arm. And another grabbing Kiara as you thrashed and screamed.

“Get off!” You shouted, they both dragged you guys into their trucks as you struggled.

“What… what are we gonna do?” JJ asked, teary eyes. “We’re going after them, right?”

“What… what can we do?” John B spoke.

“Where are they talking them?”

“They’re all right there, they’re looking this way we gotta go.” Cleo said and began to swam. The other followed but Jj stayed behind for a moment.

“JJ come on. We can’t save them if we get caught.”

“We lost the others. We’ll keep searching.” You heard a voice over the man’s radio.

Kiara stayed in the bed of the truck, you looked around for a moment before jumping out and before you could even tell her to get out, you were being shouted at.

You ran away, as far as you could. But that wasn’t very far before they caught you again, one of them punching you and knocking you down, your cheek falling right back onto the sand.

“Jesus, dude! I’m gonna have a black fucking eye!” You shouted, groaning as they threw you back into the truck.

“Worth a shot, I guess.” You shrugged when Kiara looked at you in shock.

The pilot came up to the truck.

“We saved your life.” Kiara whispered to him.

“I know. I know. I’m sorry. I’m gonna try to help you, okay? I swear, I didn’t know it was gonna be like this. Look, if you don’t fight, if you just do what they say, these guys probably… they probably won’t hurt you.”

“Probably?” You recoiled, making a face at him.

“What did Ward promise you?” Kiara asked.

“Who? Hey, just take my advice, do what they say. Good luck.”

The man got back in the truck.

“All right, let’s go.”

- - - - ᨳ꒰ ୨୧ ꒱ഒ - - - -

“Jesus, this dude is loaded.” You whispered to yourself when the truck drove up to the house. Kiara and you looked at each other worriedly as you were being walked in.

The house was huge, full of antiques and relics.

“Take them upstairs. The Orinoco room.” One women said, and you both were grabbed by the arm and dragged upstairs.

You shoved the dudes arm off you when you entered the room.

“Inside.”

“Why are we here? Who are you working for?”

“Dinner at eight. I’d clean up.”

“Just tell us what they want!-“ Kiara shouted, but the man shut the door in her face and the door locked.

“Great. This is fun. A little sleepover.”

Kiara looked out the window, and you looked at the dresses hanging up.

“At least they’ve got taste…?” You mumbled, flicking through the dresses. Two red dresses for each size.

“Pick your size.” The note read. You shrugged to yourself, grabbing one.

“Least it gets me out of these clothes.”

Later, the both of you were escorted downstairs.

“You know, this dress looks actually pretty good on me. Think they’ll let me keep it?” You asked Kiara when you walked downstairs, looking at yourself in a mirror.

“Why out of everyone to be stuck with did it have to be you?” She murmured.

“I’m offended. I think it’s a lot better than being struck with JJ. I’m just trying to lighten the mood.”

As you walked down and were directed into a room.

“Uh, excuse me?” Kiara said to a man, with a shaved head.

The man turned around, his eyes meeting yours first, his face falling.

“No, I knew you and Ward were behind this shit.” Kiara spoke, your mouth agape as you stared at him as in shock.

“What are you talking about? You guys trying to weasel in on my deal? Is that what’s going on?” He walked towards Kiara.

“No fucking way!” You shouted, turning on your heels, holding your hands up and beginning to walk out before a guard manhandled you inside, throwing you onto the floor. “Goddamnit!” You huffed.

“Is there like any other room I can be in? Specifically without him?” You asked the guard, before he slammed the door in your face.

“Seriously?” Rafe started. “You’re so fucking imm-“

“Yes, seriously! Last time I saw you was months ago, and you held a gun to my head and a knife to my throat! How am I immature?” You pointed at him, standing up and getting closer to him, shouting in his face now.

“I wondered if your little reunion would cause sparks, you know.” A man said. All of you turning to him now. He chuckled and turned.

“Who are you?” Rafe asked the man.

“Me? My name is Carlos Singh. It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Cameron. And Ms. Carrera and l/n, I do apologize for the rough tactics of bringing you here.”

He turned his gaze to you.

“And I heard you’re a fighter. And a runner. Roughed up a few of my guys.” He chuckled. “All is forgiven. Please, come.” He motioned to the other room.

Kiara looked back at you.

“Sit down.”

Rafe looked at Kiara and at you, you sneered at him and walked behind Kiara, your arms crossed as you sat down on a chair.

“Rough tactics. What about me?” Rafe asked the man.

“Yes, Mr. Cameron. False pretenses. But, the ends justify the means, I’m afraid. Sit. Please.”

Rafe sat on a chair next to you, while you scooted over as far as you possibly could. He exhaled as he looked at you and back at the man.

“We have a lot to talk about.”

“Yeah, fucking right we do.” You scoffed, leaning back in the chair.

- - - - ᨳ꒰ ୨୧ ꒱ഒ - - - -

“Hey. Hey!” He shouted, hanging on the closed door and messing with the doorknob.

“Oh my God, yeah I’m gonna lock myself in the bathroom, do not disturb me.” You murmured as the man shut the door, Kiara grabbing your wrist and stopping you.

“If I have to deal with him, so do you.”

You groaned. “It’s locked, you dumbass.” You told him when he tried to continue to get it open. Kiara and you walked towards the window, he followed.

“Get off me, man!” Portis shouted.

“Who the hell is that guy?” Rafe asked, watching the man be dragged.

“We know him. It’s Jimmy Portis. He was trying to help us.” Kiara whispered. Singh looked at the window, pulling out a gun.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Rafe spoke, the man dissapearing in the back. All you could hear was the gun firing.

Rafe swallowed, Kiara panted, your mouth hung open in shock.

“This diary. Hey, no bullshit.” He turned to you, “don’t bullshit me. Do you guys have it?”

“I don’t know anything about a damn diary!” You told him. “You sure you don’t?”

“I think I would know if I fucking-“ he started.

“Kie?” You turned to her, voice hopeful. She shook her head.

“No.”

“Well, it’s official. We’re all dying together.” You said with a groan, running a hand over your face.

“Nobodies dying.” Rafe said, glancing at you.

“Yeah? What’s your bright idea then, buzz?” You asked, your arms crossed.

Ouch, went straight for the haircut.

[theocddiaries]

Yukio: You know what I heard? That finding a horseshoe brings good luck. Logan: Hm, and what if you find it in a stable like the one we're in? Yukio: It doesn’t matter, a horseshoe is a horseshoe. Logan: No, I meant--Never mind. Wade: Cool, and I found one! Yukio: And they say that to increase your good luck, you have to spin around three times and throw the horseshoe over your shoulder while making a wish. You'll have a better chance of it coming true. Logan: Does it work for two rounds? I’d like to go back in time to when he found me and put up more resistance. Wade: Ah-ah! It’s my horseshoe and my good luck, I found it. Let’s see… [gets into position]: Move aside so I don’t hit you by accident. [whispering] Logan: Where did you hear that? Yukio: Nowhere. But Wade laughed at my interest in astrology, so I’m getting back at him with his superstitions. Logan: …I like you, Yukio. [Wade finishes spinning three times and throws the horseshoe. It hits a mirror behind him.] Yukio: Wanda’s mirror! Oh, no, she has such a bad temper… I can't imagine how bad it could get if she gets mad! Logan: Same old story with this idiot, this guy doesn’t miss. He never fucking misses!! Yukio: What do we do?! Wade: What do you think we’re gonna do? Fucking run, strategical retreat! [grabs them by the hand and they all run away] [Hours later, the three return home. They park right over some screws scattered on the road.] Wade [frantic]: Are you gonna tell me that running out of gas six miles from the gas station isn’t bad luck? Logan: No, it’s not bad luck, it’s mismanagement. Didn’t I tell you to put gas in last night? Wade: …And why do I always have to be the one!? Someone else step up and do it! Logan: Shh, ssh, sssh!! [The three go quiet and hear a tire losing air. They follow the sound and see the tire deflating. Logan picks up the screw.] Wade: Well, are you gonna tell me that this isn’t bad luck either!? Logan: No, that’s being useless. Those are the screws that you dropped this morning, that I told you to pick up, and clearly you didn’t even though you swore you did! Wade: …You have an answer for everything, don't you? Just to deny reality, you have an answer for everything! I knew I shouldn’t have gotten out of bed today. On Friday the 13th, don’t get married and don’t set sail! Yukio: But you haven’t set sail. This is a car. Wade: Same thing. It’s a way to encompass everything that involves moving with vehicles, whatever type they are. Why did I get out of bed, God!? Logan: That’s what I’m wondering. Why did you get out of bed today? If you hadn’t gotten out of bed, we’d all be happy today. Hell, if you had never gotten out of bed, the world would be fine! There wouldn’t be any wars, we’d all be singing 'Imagine' together hand in hand! Wade: How nice, man, how nice. This is how you talk to your boyfriend. I’ll let it slide because I know you’re stressed about the seven years of bad luck that await us. Logan: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what do you mean "await us"? You broke the mirror. It’ll be waiting for you. Wade: Right. Rub salt in the open wound. I don’t know what I saw in you. [storms off indignantly] Logan: Great, another night sleeping on the couch. Yukio: Don’t worry. Look on the bright side, since you’re practically immortal, seven years will fly by for you. Logan: Yeah, kid, but when his seven years of bad luck are over, mine will stay the same because I’ll still be with him. Yukio: Aaw, that’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard!

[butter-cream33]

"Yeah... I hope so."

PAIRING: Sam Winchester x Reader x Dean Winchester

SUMMARY: You're caught when hunting a vampire nest with Sam and Dean, but... They get there too late. You were hopeful... until you saw the reaper sitting in the back seat.

WORD & CHAR COUNT: 3,293 - 13,774

PAIRING: Sam Winchester x Reader x Dean Winchester

TAGS: Blood / Death / Wounds

AUTHOR'S NOTE: It's been a while since I've uploaded! I hope you guys cry when reading this(but in a good way ,yk?).

 I could barely keep my eyes open. Everything was sore, and I was cold…

 We’d been hunting this vampire nest for two weeks. We thought we had it under control, that it was just a tiny, well-hidden nest that we could empty in one swoop. However, we couldn’t have been more wrong. Despite these vampires all looking young, they were very, very old. They were experienced, they were skilled, and they were smart. By the time I realized what we were really dealing with, it was too late.

 I had picked up my phone to call Sam and Dean, but just as they answered the phone, a rag was shoved against my mouth. It wasn’t long at all before I found myself losing consciousness.

 I’d been tied up in their nest for hours, my wrists bound together and keeping me suspended by a hook mounted on a beam.

 By now, my hands were numb. My feet were a few inches off of the ground, just enough to make me feel like this rope was going to rip my hands off. I had cuts and bites all over my body. Some of these wounds, they didn’t even use… They just hurt me for fun. They’d watch my blood drip on the floor only to laugh in my face. It took hours for me to finally get myself to stop crying. I didn’t want to give them a reaction anymore, despite how hard it was. It was so hard.

 I was stuck there for ages. I couldn’t tell how long, I just knew it was long enough for it to get dark, then light again… A whole night in this disgusting basement.

 Thankfully, they got… bored of me.

 They left the basement, now hanging out upstairs. I could hear them talking, but I wasn’t able to make out the words. All I could do was wait.

 But what was I waiting for?

 For Sam and Dean to bust in?

 Those vampires to come back?

 To bleed out?

I was wasting my time with the hopeful wish that they’d save me. I knew what was happening. My hands and feet had gone numb, my skin was white, and I felt cold. I felt so, so cold. My mouth was so dry and my lips were chapped and bleeding. They had almost bled me dry. All I could do now was stare at the bloody, dirty floor.

 I finally raised my head as I heard a loud crash upstairs. It was followed by shouting, a few gunshots, and more crashes.

 My eyes drooped, shutting for a few seconds. It was getting harder to keep them open. Although, my hope rose alongside the volume of the fighting upstairs. Maybe I shouldn’t have been so hopeless about the possibility of Sam and Dean not showing up. They were here. We were going to be okay.

 “...S-Sam…!” I called out, but it was barely audible. My voice was raspy, nothing more than a coarse whisper.

 “Sam! D-De–” I burst into a coughing fit, splattering more blood on the floor. “Dean!”

 I could feel the tears start running down my face. The relief of their arrival washed over me, my chest aching as I sobbed their names.

 “Y/N!”

 I heard them calling from upstairs. It wasn’t much longer— I saw the door to the basement come flying down the stairs. They knocked it clean off of its hinges. Their boots made loud thuds against the wooden boards of the stairs, the two of them nearly toppling over each other to get down.

 “Y/N!” Sam shouted as he got to me first.

 I let out a heavy sigh of relief as his large hands cupped my face by my jaw, my head resting in his palms. I couldn’t stop myself from sobbing, giving him a weak smile through my tears. He pulled my eyelid up, checking me. I knew he was just checking to see if I was turning— but I just wanted to leave as soon as possible. Dean raised his knife, cutting the rope on my wrists. I dropped, but Sam quickly caught me.

 “The hell are we waiting for? Let’s fucking go–” Dean barked the order, gesturing for us to get out. “–She needs a damn hospital.”

 Both of their faces twisted with worry as I groaned in pain, my hands cramping as the blood was able to flow through them again.

 After seeing this, Sam didn’t waste another second. He scooped me up, holding me against his body with my legs on his hips and my arms over his shoulders. He didn’t care how much blood got him— Not that I had much left, anyway. One of his hands supported me, the other firmly holding the back of my head as my chin rested on his shoulder. As the three of us left the house, I watched over his shoulder, seeing a dozen dead vampires all over the floor. I simply closed my eyes, gritting my teeth.

 The two rushed me to the Impala, Sam still clutching me as he got in the car. Dean didn’t wait one second more, revving the engine as he sped out of the driveway.

 “Y/N?” Sam croaked, “Hey-hey-hey—” He sheepishly repeated the word as he looked at my face, gently patting the side of my face. “Stay with us– Okay? Keep your eyes open. Dean!” He shouted at Dean, the worry in his voice becoming one of rage. Rather than snapping back at Sam for shouting, the engine roared as Dean gassed it. The Impala raced down the road as fast as it could go. It was hard to hear the two of them talking over the engine with the way my head was spinning.

 “Sam…?” I took a breath.

 “Give her some water.” Dean shoved a water bottle against Sam, not taking his eyes off of the road.

 “Tilt your head back, okay?” Sam spoke softly to me. Even then, I could still hear the pain in his voice. He was afraid, his eyes glistening as tears welled in his eyes. “Drink this.” Sam carefully held the water bottle to my lips, slowly tilting it so as not to give me too much at one time. I eagerly drank it, raising my blood-soaked hand to hold the bottle. He shook his head as I did.

 “Don’t worry about that– I’ve got you.”

 Once he pulled the bottle away, I took a deep breath. “I’m—” I gritted my teeth, “–I’m sorry… I was going to call–”

 “Don’t worry about that.” Dean shook his head as he drove.

 “I was— was going to call you.” I cried, “I f-found out where they w-were– I– I was going to call you, but they f-found me… I’m sorry.”

 “I said don’t worry about that, you understand me?” Dean raised his voice. “We’re getting you to the hospital. They’re gonna fix you.”

 I drew in a shaky breath, but it turned into a coughing fit. I could only watch as my blood hit Sam’s face. He didn’t even flinch, he just carefully pushed my hair out of my face, still choking back tears. I knew what was happening. I was never going to make it to the hospital— Not with that reaper sitting in the back seat, her eyes on me with a sorrowful expression.

“…Pull over.”

 The silence that came was… tense. I could cut through glass with it. Both of them stared at me in shock, but I could see it in their eyes. They knew. They could tell. With how many times they watched someone die, this was nothing new.

 The Impala slowed down a bit as Dean glared at me. He followed my gaze, seeing that I was looking in the back of the car.

 He’d had his own experience with reapers, or at least enough to know there was one waiting for me.

 “You leave her the hell alone!” He screamed, hopelessly swinging his gun into the backseat and firing off useless shots.

 “Dean!” Sam shouted at him, pulling me tighter against him as he watched Dean snap.

 Dean’s gun clicked as he ended up emptying the clip. He threw it into the floor of the car, turning to face the wheel again. He was gripping the wheel so hard his knuckles were white, revving the engine again as he swerved around a corner. Of course, the Reaper hadn’t moved an inch. She was still sitting there, the bullets had gone through her like mist.

 “Dean… Please p-pull over.” I sucked air through my teeth, fighting to keep my eyes open.

 “We’re getting you to the hospital, that’s it.” He argued, not wanting to stop the car. My pleas for him to pull over went in one ear and out the other. Meanwhile, Sam just did his best to comfort me, desperately finding anything he could to stop the bleeding. Napkins from the glove box, gauze from the first aid kit, and t-shirts from his bag. Although… none of it was enough. By now, Sam’s large hands were stained red with my blood. The seat was soaked and sticky, along with his clothes.

 “De… Dean, I–” Sam’s voice cracked as he tried not to cry, staring down at me, “I can’t… It won’t–”

 He rambled through broken whispers, trying to form sentences. It was hard to even make out his words anymore as my head was spinning.

 I slowly looked at the reaper again. This time, she was leaning forward, her hands gently holding the backside of the front seat.

 “…Are you staying? Or are you coming with me?” Her voice was sad. She didn’t sound like she wanted to take me with her, but it was her job. She had to. “I’m sure you’ve dealt with enough ghosts to know what happens if you stay, but… it’s your choice. I’ll understand.”

 I gasped as I tried not to burst into tears– not that I had the energy to do it anyway.

 “I…” I croaked, “Do I have time to say goodbye?’

 The reaper slowly nodded, “Yes, but… Only goodbye.”

 I nodded as I took in what she was saying. There was no way I was getting out of this. As I looked away from her, I could see Sam looking down at me with wide eyes, glaring like a deer in headlights. Dean was doing the same, the car slowing down. Even though they couldn’t hear or see the reaper, all they had to do was hear what I said to realize that it was time for me to go.

 The Impala slowly pulled to a stop on the side of the road as we parked.

 “S-Sam?”

 Sam sniffled, pushing his hair out of his face as he tried to hold his composure together, “Yeah? What is it?” His voice cracked as he spoke. His face was soaked, shiny from the tears that ran down and dripped onto his clothes.

 “Can… Can we sit on the hood? I don’t want the last thing I see to be the ceiling of the car.” I gave a weak laugh which came out as more of a wheeze.

 Both of them nodded, agreeing as they hurried out of the car. Dean got out first, coming around to open the door while Sam did his best to pick me up without hurting me anymore. He carefully climbed out of the car, cradling me as he steadied himself in the tall grass beside the road. Sam then took slow steps to the hood of the car, gently laying me in the middle of it, his jacket hanging around me like a blanket. The two of them just stood beside the car, staring at me beside one another, mournful looks on their faces.

 “Hey, D-Dean?”

 He didn’t say anything, but he raised his chin a bit as I spoke to him.

 “Can you put our song on the r-radio?”

 Sam sputtered as he choked up a smile, looking off to the side as he put his bloody hand over his mouth. Dean kept up his usual stoic expression, trying to detach himself as he nodded his head and got back in the car.

 “S-Sam— Come on…”

 “…What?” He looked a bit confused, struggling to think straight.

 I patted the hood of the car, leaving a red handprint on the black paint. His lip trembled as he tried to keep his smile, taking a reluctant step to the car. He carefully climbed onto the hood of the car with me, lying next to me. The car rocked a bit, tilting with his weight. His hand then planted on my leg, making sure I didn’t slide at all. I gave a weary smile and placed my hand over his. Sam could hardly look at me, just looking up at the sky as we interlocked our fingers.

 It wasn’t long before the radio kicked on, “Simple Man” by Lynyrd Skynyrd playing. While Sam, Dean, and I all had very different tastes in music, we all had one song we liked— and this was it. We’d all sing along in the car, laughing as we couldn’t hit notes and lacked any sense of melody, just three idiots screaming lyrics in a car with smiles on our faces.

 Dean got out of the car, closing the door as he then climbed onto the hood with us. I reached my other hand over, holding his hand as well.

 We all just laid there, Sam on my right, Dean on my left, and nothing but the stars to keep us company. Given that we were out in the countryside, there was hardly any light pollution. We could see the moon and stars for miles and miles… I took it in for a moment, closing my eyes and letting out a deep breath. As I did, I felt both of them flinch. Without opening my eyes, I just smiled and croaked again,

 “Not— Not dead yet.”

 I could feel the relief from them as their grip on my hands tightened.

 “D-Dean?”

 “Yeah?” He spoke quietly, not moving.

 “Stop… Stop being a statue for five minutes, g-got it? Y-You’re making your brother look like a b-baby.”

 We all gave a soft chuckle as I spoke, Dean finally cracking.

 “I just—” He sucked air through his teeth, “We don’t want you to go.”

 “I know.” I choked on my words. By now, I knew the reaper was pushing it for me. This was taking more time than just a goodbye.

 “Can I tell you something?” The words grated out of Sam’s throat.

 “Yeah, what?” I turned to look at him.

 “I… I love you.”

 We all laid there in silence for a moment, taking in what Sam said. A few seconds went by before Dean slowly pulled his hand away from mine, seeming he wanted to distance himself afterward.

 “I wasn’t sure for a while, I… I thought I was just being stupid, but… I’m sure now, and I wish I knew before this happened.”

 I gave Sam a tearful smile, squeezing his hand tightly. “I… I love you too, Sam.”

 We both gave weary laughs, Sam rolling on his side to face me. He leaned over me, gently placing his hand on my cheek. I looked at him through droopy eyes, eventually closing them as he leaned in and kissed me. It was short… but sweet. I was happy that he’d decided to actually tell me, rather than leaving me wondering.

 Although, I didn’t want to leave Dean alone like that.

 “Dean?” I looked over at him. He was just staring at the sky, his hands balled into tight fists over his stomach. “What’s wrong?”

 “It doesn’t matter now.” He shook his head with a weary smirk, “No point.”

 “It does matter, Dean.” I reached over, placing my hand over the top of his fist. He still wouldn’t look at me. “Now is absolutely the time, I mean… There won’t be a later.”

 Dean closed his eyes for a moment, taking a deep breath as he finally coughed up the words. “Sammy beat me to it.”

 It took me a second, but I eventually pieced together what he meant. Sam had just confessed to me, but Dean… He did too. They were both in love with me. I wasn’t sure what to do, but I didn’t have the time to think about it, so… I might as well go out with a bang.

 “I… Dean, look at me.”

 Dean begrudgingly opened his eyes, looking over at me. His eyes were glazed over with tears, one finally rolling down his cheek. It was getting harder for him to hold it in.

 “I love you, too.” I squeezed his hand a bit.

 He looked a bit confused, but… He slowly took the same action as Sam, partially rolling on his side.

 “But… You just said—”

 “I know.”

 “Then wh–”

 “F… Fuck being normal, right?” I coughed as I laughed, “If I’m— If I’m going out, I–I’m going happy.”

 I expected them to bicker, get angry, maybe cry, but… They didn’t. Sam squeezed my hand, Dean interlocking fingers with my other hand once again. He followed Sam’s steps, leaning in as he kissed me. I was happy that they didn’t question it, seeming to understand what I meant about not being normal. For all the years we’d been hunting together, I was stuck in the middle. I couldn’t decide whether I wanted to pursue Sam, or whether I wanted to go for Dean… I felt selfish to want both of them like this, but right now, I felt like I had the right to be a little bit selfish.

 As Dean pulled away, he put his forehead to mine, taking a sharp breath. His hand was shaking.

 We all slowly laid back down, just looking up at the sky, hand in hand, smiles and blood on our faces, and tears running down our cheeks.

 “S-Sam, you get my necklace, okay?”

 “Are you sure…?”

 “Yeah… I’m sure.” I nodded, sighing. “And— And Dean, you get my b-bracelet.”

 “Y-You both have to promise me something.” I knew I was running out of time. The reaper was out of the car now. She was standing beside the car, her hands across as she looked at me. I took in a deep breath, “No deals. No crossroads demons, no witchcraft, no summoning… None of it. Okay…?”

 I thought my hands were going to break as they both squeezed them, taking sharp breaths of their own.

 “I promise.” Sam’s voice shattered as he gasped, putting his other hand over his mouth again.

 “Promise.” Dean tightened his fist, pressing it against the car.

 We all took in a deep breath, our hands shaking. I closed my eyes, a weak smile on my face. By now, I couldn’t hold out any longer. I wasn’t even sure I had legs at this point, they were cold and I couldn’t move them anymore.

 When I opened my eyes again, I wasn’t lying on the hood of the car. I was standing in front of it, looking at myself. The reaper had her hand on my shoulder, gently squeezing it.

 “I… So…” I didn’t know what to say. “I’m ready to go.”

 The reaper gave me a mournful smile, “I’m glad you chose to come with me. I don’t think they could bear seeing you as a spirit.”

 “Yeah… I just– Are they going to be okay?” I looked at her.

 She sighed, “…No. They won’t be, but they’ll manage. They always do, huh?”

 I glanced back at them. By now they were sitting up, looking down at my lifeless body, still clutching my hands as they did their best not to break down.

 “Yeah… I hope so.”

Do NOT copy/paste this work anywhere. I wrote this, it is my own work. If you want to reblog it, that's perfectly fine.

Thanks for reading! <3

[foxes-that-run]

Driving and Cars

Driving and Cars is a Haylor Theme

Taylor

Red: Loving him is like driving a new Maserati down a dead-end street

Treacherous: That nothing safe is worth the drive and I would follow you, follow you home

Run: And my so-called friends, they don’t know I’d drive away before I let you go

The Very First Night: I drive down different roads but they all lead back to you

Begin Again: And we walked down the block to my car and I almost brought him up

Style: Long drive, could end in burning flames or paradise

All You Had To Do Was Stay: All I know is that you drove us off the road

I Wish You Would: You say it’s in the past, you drive straight ahead

Wildest Dreams: He said, “Let’s get out of this town, drive out of the city, away from the crowds”

You Are In Love: Small talk, he drives, coffee at midnight

Getaway Car: You were driving the getaway car, we were flying, but we’d never get far

Paper Rings: I want to drive away with you

Betty: She said, “James, get in, let’s drive”

August "Remember when I pulled up and said, "Get in the car""

...Ready for it? But if he's a ghost, then I can be a phantom Holdin' him for ransom (Ghost and Phantom are types of Rolls Royce)

End Game: We do the most, I’m in the Ghost like I’m whippin’ a boat

King Of My Heart: 'Cause all the boys and their expensive cars, with their Range Rovers and their Jaguars

New Year’s Day: You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi

Cruel Summer: I’m drunk in the back of the car and I cried like a baby coming home from the bar

Cardigan: To kiss in cars and downtown bars was all we needed

Cowboy Like Me: You’re a cowboy like me, never wanted love, just a fancy car

‘Tis The Damn Season: Time flies, messy as the mud on your truck tires

Hits Different: I slur your name ‘til someone puts me in a car Other Songs written by Taylor

I Don’t Wanna Live Forever: Now I’m in a cab, I tell him where your place is

Harry

Keep Driving: I would ask, "Should we just keep driving?"

Cinema: In doses at night (night, night) No roof on the drive

Hunger: You told me you learned to drive / I guess you lied

Story of my Life: I drive all night to keep her warm / And time is frozen (the story of, the story of)

Already Home: We know it’s not right, your car is outside with a cold seat and

Pick you up: Let's be honest, you called me So I'll pick you up on the way home

Complicated Freak: Back seat of the car and up in the air

Perfect And if you like midnight driving with the windows down

[screamingiminlovewithyou]

I wish I could fly I’d pick you up and we’d go back in time i’d write this in the sky I miss you like it was the very first night

[youcalledmebabe]

The Pacific episode 10 thoughts

I KNOW Leckie is thinking of him and Hoosier while the nurse is reading about achilles

Also welcome back king I missed you

They should’ve made Ross McCall reprise Joe as this cab driver. No explanation of why he’s in… Pennsylvania? Just Joe. Making a killing off all these fucking sailors

Leckie’s parents are so awful

No job no girl but you got Sid!

Lena going to meet John’s family :(

Snafu’s social skills have come so far

Yesss leckie get your job back

How old is Leckie supposed to be. To me he gives like 35. But I’m sure he’s younger. I could google this but I won’t ❤️

Fuck Leckie’s mom all my homies hate Leckie’s mom

Snafu leaving sledge on the train is crazy… but also Sid left him without a goodbye first

I guess I kinda like sledgefu as a tragic wartime thing that ends with the lack of a goodbye

This clown wearing a uniform without even fighting get his ass Leckie!

He never sent his dear Vera letters??

Sid picking Sledge up I know that’s right!

I want you to be my best man oh I’m sure…

Sledge’s reunion with his parents 🥹

I didn’t realize Sledge had a brother. He seems like an only child

You’re scaring the hoes sledge

I wish we’d had post war eps for MOTA and BOB. I feel like the reason those feel like they glamorize war more is because we don’t see what happens after: the depression, the nightmares, the anger. The characters in those shows fly off into the sunset

Sledge and his dad made me cry

Sledge in the meadow also made me cry

Sledge choosing the study of life after the war…

Well I really want to read sledge and Leckie’s books now

Overall I’d rank the pacific as a solid second in my hbo war list. It was a hard watch that hammered in the brutality of war—which I think is important. Sledge’s arc was amazing and will probably be on my mind for a long time. But it was definitely more disjointed than BOB and I found it hard to get very attached to any of the characters because of that. I also don’t know if I see myself drawn to rewatch this as much as I’ve wanted to rewatch BOB or even MOTA

[womanexile]

https://www.tumblr.com/bluewinnerangel/671855816935145472/hii-j-hope-this-isnt-a-stupid-question-to-ask?source=share

Larries claim the paper airplane and bird? I never knew :/ have yo7 heard this before? What do you think about what their saying?

Please don’t listen to larries lol. Here’s when HS gave it to TS.

Both TS & HS talk about flying to the other a lot in their lyrics.

“If I could fly, I’d be coming right back home to you”

“If I was a bluebird, I would fly to you”

“Two paper airplanes flying, flying, flying”

“I wish I could fly, I’d pick you up and we’d go back in time”

As for LT paper airplane tattoo I think it’s bc of the album Take Me Home aesthetic. LT helped write a lot of the songs on that album. It was the album I think he first felt like he was really contributing a lot to the band. So that album probably means a lot to him.

Just remember larrie never happened. They like to take Haylor things & make it into larrie.

[swiftllama]

As a fellow swiftie/smosh fan.... the implications of this is me trying with their whole situation... much to ponder

‘This Is Me Trying’ is a great shout, anon! Albeit depressing, but fitting nonetheless 🥲

I personally see it from Anthony’s pov.

Some lyric breakdowns :-

“I’ve been having a hard time adjusting / I had the shiniest wheels now they’re rusting.”

- Anthony after he left and was trying to find his voice, and ‘adjusting’ to life outwith Smosh.

“I didn’t know if you’d care if I came back / I have a lot of regrets about that.”

“And maybe I don’t quite know what to say / But I’m here in your doorway.”

- Anthony’s worries and anxiety before reconnecting with Ian.

“And it’s hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound / It’s hard to be anywhere these days when all I want is you / You’re a flashback on a film reel on the one screen in my town.”

- Anthony missing Ian and reminiscing on the past.

If I can add, another Taylor track I’ve mentioned in relation to Ianthony that I’ve had on repeat since they announced their reunion and that is in the same vein as ‘This Is Me Trying’ in regards to missing someone and reminiscing is ‘The Very First Night’.

Lyric breakdown :-

“I wish I could fly / I’d pick you up and we’d go back in time / I’d write this in the sky / I miss you like it was the very first night.”

“And so it goes, every weekend this same party / I never go alone and I don’t seem brokenhearted / My friends all say they know everything I’m going through / I drive down different roads but they all lead back to you.”

“….They don’t know how much I miss you.”

- Could be taken from Ian’s pov, as he said after Anthony left people would just come up to him and ask if he was okay. They probably felt they knew what he was going through but no one really ‘knew’. Same with Anthony. They were both putting on a front of just how much they were missing one another. Also the parallel of - “And it’s hard to be at a party when I feel like an open wound.” // “Every weekend, this same party / I never go alone and I don’t seem brokenhearted.”

“Back then we didn’t know we were built to fall apart / We broke the status quo, then we broke each other’s hearts.”

- Back in the day they probably never would have believed that their relationship would fall apart, and, like Ian said that, that had to happen for them to come back together. So they had to break the ‘status quo’ of their relationship, and in turn they did break each others hearts.

And lastly a few more fitting lyrics that I don’t have much explanation for as I’d say they speak for themselves :-

“But don’t forgot about the night out in L.A. /Danced in the kitchen, chased me down through the hallway / No one knows about the words that we whispered / No one knows how much I miss you.”

“I’m the one on the phone as you whisper / ‘Do you know how much I miss you?’.”

“I wish that we could go back in time / And I’d say to you / I miss you like it was the very first night.”

[danganronpasurvivoraskblog]

The Doll...

Hey! 

KaKa! Oh, and looks like you’ve brought some friends with you!

You guys told me that I could bring backup if I wanted to, so I decided to pick out these two.

I will do what I can to be of use to us all.

Just a word of warning Chiebukuro. Depending on how much value Otonokoji has to Zetsubou, they might launch a full scale attack to get her back.

Then again, I doubt even Zetsubou would handle someone like her after this.

Hah. It’s alright. You’re just letting me know not to let my guard down.

Believe me, you underestimate the Kisaragi Foundation.

No. I just don’t want the Kisaragi Foundation to underestimate Zetsubou!

That’s what we did...and that’s why we’ve been up shits creek without a paddle for so long...

Kuripa...

It will be fine. The Foundation has lots of defenses, we should be able to take anything that they throw at us.

Oh! So you will be going with them, Yamato?

Yeah...

I think it’s high time I went home. My sister is waiting for me, after all.

Your sister!?

He means Kurokawa.

Oh! I had no idea!

So does this mean you’ll all be returning to the Kisaragi HQ?

No. Just dropping Kanade off and coming back. We’ve left Doc Ando here after all.

The Doctor is with Seiko upstairs. He’s been working on her medication ever since he got let outta the lab.

Eden Owari, yes?

Yep. Just checkin’ in on the little one.

The little one? You mean-

???: Um...

...!

*Everyone’s attention is turned as another person joins their conversation.

Hey I...uh...I changed.

Hibiki, hey! How are you doing?

Well...confused as all heck for one thing...It’s like I went to sleep and didn’t wake up for a long time...

Setsuka’s hair is longer, Sora’s a computer, Yoruko became a dark-haired cougar, and my sister is a psychopath...!

Hey! Who’s a cougar!

S-Sorry! I really need to stop saying what I think...!

...No, it’s fine...Honestly, I’d prefer that you did.

Girl, it’s only natural that you’re confused. It’ll take a while, but we’re willing to explain everything to you.

Thanks...

So...you’re coming along with the transfer too or something?

Huh!? Oh uh...no, I’m gonna stay here...

Yes, I believe it would be unwise for her to remain within the proximity of her sister. 

Though I do not wish to jinx us, if Kanade escapes while Hibiki is present, she will more than likely grab her and make off with her somehow.

But we’d be flying. How would she jump without a parachute?

She would...She’d be more than happy to jump to her death so long as I died with her.

R-Really...?

That’s how we went out before...Kanade and I shared an execution because she brainwashed me into helping her murder Setsuka...

Oh...

...

...

...

Um...sssssooo...We about ready?

Huh? Oh, uh...yeah!

...

Hey, Hibiki, I...

I like the outfit by the way. 

Yeah, thanks...Setsuka picked it out for me...

Still a little confused about this thing though.

*She fiddles with a cue ball shaped pin on her collar.

Oh that? Heh! Think of it as a memento to remember me by.

...

*sniff* You...

Biki! What’s wrong!?

Don’t! Just DON’T!

!!!??

Hibiki!?

Oh boy...Here we go.

...!

*Kaede nudges Kuripa.

Why...Why are you doing this...!?

Doing what!?

Why are you all being so NICE to me!?

I’ve never been kind to any of you...! I just push you all away harshly because I thought Kanade was all I needed...and you all know I was complicit in a lot of her murders!

Including YOURS!

...!?

I killed you...and betrayed all of you...! So WHY are you giving me things like new clothes and a shelter!? Why won’t you just let me DIE!?

Hibiki-!

I’m...I’m a monster...! All I do is harbor death and pain...!

Where is this even coming from?

Otonokoji, we don’t-

Rei!

!!?

Shush...Let them handle this. You and I should just stay out of it.

Hm...

Hibiki, you’re being too harsh on yourself. You can’t blame yourself for the things that Kanade has done.

She’s right. Kanade is the monster here, not you.

Oh sure...Kanade is the monster that kills people that I become friends with! Maybe I don’t murder people myself but I’m the REASON so many innocent people died!

Quit trying to console me, I don’t deserve it!

*She snaps towards Setsuka.

And you...You just don’t learn, do you!?

What are you talking about...!?

You’re ONE of the people who Kanade murdered all because you got too attached!

Even though I was harsh...even though I could be rude and selfish, you still gave me comfort when I needed it, Setsuka!

When the Killing Game terrified me, and when I was worried about what was going on with the outside world, you gave me courage! You taught me to keep going without fear...!

It gave me strength and courage, and the desire to stand up against the Despair...And what happened...!?

You DIED! I repayed your kindness with DEATH AND MISERY!

...

The security and comfort you showed was just a false sense, and YOU were the one who paid the price for it...! 

So just...leave me alone! Don’t try and be my friend or help me! I’m just...a detestable...narrow-minded...BUG of a girl!

Hibiki, wait! C-Calm down!

I CAN’T! I can’t calm down!

All of you deserve to shame me and ridicule me for what I did, but you’re not saying anything and are instead trying to HELP me!? I BETRAYED YOU!

I spat on every good thing that we might have had in the past! I’m WORTHLESS! So just-!

*SMACK!*

...!?

...!

...!

...!

...!

...!

...

*Hibiki is cut off as Kaede suddenly slaps her around the face!

WAKE UP!

...!!?

...You can’t force yourself into this delusion that everyone hates you or doesn’t want you around, Hibiki. You can’t just reject kindness because you think it would be in everyone’s best interest.

That is EXACTLY what let Kanade GET TO YOU in the first place!

...!

Your sister...she toyed with your mind...she murdered everyone you love...she got you killed because she was so obsessed with you...

And you think YOU’RE the bad guy for that!?

I...

Did you TELL Kanade to murder all those people? Did you ask her?

N-No! I wasn’t even aware of her true nature until the Killing Game...

Well there you go then!

NONE of this is your fault, Hibiki. And if anyone says otherwise, tell me! I’ll go kick their ass!

Kaede...!

You’re calling yourself the scum of the earth...Saying that you’re no better than your sister...

Believe me when I tell you that I’ve met THE scum of the earth!

And I’m telling you right now, if that were really true, you wouldn’t even THINK about saying that about yourself. 

And you know...I know this is a groaner and super cliché of a line but...I think you and I are actually alike in many ways.

...You think so?

Akamatsu is also an older twin sister...or at least, she was...

Yeah...but that’s not really what I’m getting at. I...had a very similar experience of self-loathing and pain when I came back from my own Killing Game...

Wait...You were in a Killing Game too!?

Yeah...Danganronpa 53...

Wh-What...? What kind of...

Hibiki...This is gonna sound ridiculous to you...But Kaede, Kirumi and all their friends are from another universe.

What!?

You...You really expect me to believe that!?

Not really, but it’s the truth!

Putting that aside...I was in a Killing Game...and like you, I came back to life somehow.

At first, I had a horrible case of amnesia, and didn’t remember anything that I had done...but once I remembered, I was overcome with this horrible guilt...And unlike you, the person I tried to murder wasn’t even around for me to apologize to...

If he was, I imagine I would have broken down the same way as you are right now.

But the problem, Hibiki...is that you can’t run from this.

...Run...?

It’s easy enough to tell everyone that they should hate you, or that you can’t be treated nicely, or that people shouldn’t want you around...But that’s the attitude of a defeatist...Someone who’s contempt to live a life of misery and isolation if it means everyone else gets to live the lives they want.

That’s not selfless or heroic in any way. It’s just...straight up dumb...! 

But I’m...I already told you...I know I’m selfish...! That’s what I hate about myself...!

Otonokoji, may I just interject here myself?

*Kuripa steps forward.

Look...Akamatsu’s better at giving advice than I am, so I won’t try and rain on her parade...But...

You said before that you were worried about how all the people who get close to you ended up as victims of your sister, right?

Kanade boasts about her she has a +60 kill count. That’s a LOT of people!

I know! And I don’t want there to be even more! Don’t you get that-

Which means that you had a hell of a lot of people who love you!

...!

To be honest, I’m not exactly popular myself. I have a pretty stick-up-the-ass attitude a lot of the time, and with how I say whatever comes to my mind with no filter... 

But even a bastard like me has people who care about him, and you know why that is? It’s because they love me, even with how I am. And there’s always going to be someone in this shitty world that does.

I don’t think you should change anything about yourself if someone else doesn’t accept you for who you really are. So I don’t. And I don’t think you should either.

Kuripa’s right. Like it or not, there’s nothing you can do to stop Setsuka from caring about you, or anyone else for that matter.

...

I...I know...Of course I know that...

But...I just...I don’t want her...

You don’t want her or anyone else to become a target because of you, right?

Huh?

Hehe...You can’t hide it from me, kiddo. The Divine Eye sees through even you.

There’s nothing you want more in the world right now than to live a peaceful life free of your sister, and to be friends with Kaede, Setsuka, and everyone else. Your fear of what could happen is what’s stopping you.

Wha-!? How do you-!?

I’m psychic sweetie. Here’s my card.

*Eden hands Hibiki her business card.

Other universes...Psychics...What is my life...!?

Hah! Tell me about it! I’m married to a supercomputer!

No need to brag, Yoyo!

But Biki...If that’s really what’s scaring you, you don’t have to worry about it.

Kanade’s been trying to murder us this whole time, even before you came into play. You’re just a little more motivation for her to do so, but not much.

Yeah. Whether or not you were here or not, we’re in danger of her. Thus, I don’t think you can really blame yourself for her actions.

Kanade Otonokoji is insane scum incarnate. That doesn’t have anything to do with you. You didn’t make her that way.

Yeah! She claims to do this out of love, and that she would murder anyone to keep you, but she doesn’t even see you as family! In her eyes, your just her favorite toy.

But still, I-!

If someone was to shoot someone in the head with a gun, would you blame the the murder on the gun?

No! You’d blame it on the person who FIRED the gun! The gun is a tool, just as you were for your sister.

Kuripa’s right. She’s the only one at fault here. And you know that, right?

...

Biki...

I...I still don’t know what to do...I’m so...lost and confused...

Even now, I still feel like this is all one horrible nightmare and I’m just trying so so hard to wake up...Maybe I’m just...always going to be a slave to my own mind.

But you know now that turning away and trying to accept it isn’t going to solve anything. 

No...And to be honest, ever since you played me that song in the lab, I haven’t felt Kanade’s influence as strongly...

...I wonder why...? That’s some special magic you’ve got there...

Oh, I’m not that special. Just a piano-obsessed weirdo who cares too much about everything.

Yeah...But it’s like your friend said, right? People love you for that, so you don’t need to change yourself for anyone.

Now you get it!

...

Setsuka...Yoruko...Sora...I’d like to thank you all...And I’m sorry for everything I...WE put you through...

Hibiki, we-

I know you said that Kanade’s actions weren’t my fault...But I can’t help but feel responsible...

...I hate to admit it, but this lady was right...I...

I wanna be friends again...! So badly...! I just...*sniff* I just...!

Hah! Well, why didn’t you say so sooner!?

...!?

*Setsuka pulls Hibiki into a hug.

...

*Yoruko, and by extension Sora, join this hug.

Hibiki...You’re not the only one who wants a change...If you want to find a life that you’re comfortable with, then I’d be more than happy to help you find it.

Everything bad that happened in the Killing Game happened because we couldn’t fight through our problems together.

Yeah...But now, we’re gonna fix that. Somehow...

Ah...Ahaahaaaaah...!

*Hibiki starts to cry, melting into the embrace of her friends.

...

...Heh...

*Kuripa pats Kaede on the shoulder.

As expected of Kaede Akamatsu. I doubt anyone would have been as successful as you in this.

Stop giving me so much credit. It’s up to Hibiki to find the answers she wants on her own. All we can do is give her a little push.

...

...Kaori...I hope I’m the sister that you always wanted me to be...

[darklydeliciousdesires]

Beyond the Blood Tie - Chapter Sixteen.

Thanks so much to the little core group continuing to give this life! Eeeep, y’all might be a bit angry at me after you read this, though... awaiting @withmyteeth​ especially to come flying into my DM’s... xD

Previous Chapters - One  Two, Part One Part Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven  Eight  Nine  Ten  Eleven  Twelve  Thirteen  Fourteen  Fifteen

Words - 5,605

Tag list - In the comments. Please DM to be added/removed

Warnings - 18+ content throughout. Minors DNI!

Edie's POV

Fifteen days. Fifteen days have now passed since I last saw Angel, and I actually feel a lot better for not seeing him, if I'm truthful. If I'm one hundred perfect honest, I can’t deny I've really missed him. He has a lot of presence, and I like it. I also like the feeling of peacefulness he gives me, the nice feeling of contentment I get when I'm next to him.  

I remember that one time we shared a bed two weeks ago, after I turned over because I couldn't stand being nudged with an erection. I lay there for a while, eyes closed but not able to immediately drop off. Just before I did finally fall asleep, I felt him move closer to me, he kissed my shoulder and then put his arm around me and moved no more. It was a little spooky when I woke during the night and moved him and he just flopped onto his back like a dead body. I suppose that's essentially because he is.

I'm getting on with life, though, because I'm not some lovesick teenager. I'm just disappointed, because I think we could be good together, but realistically, it'll never happen, or at the very least we'd have a damn good time in the bedroom, if it wasn't for his not so little problem in that department. If only he could control it. But hey, you can't live your life in 'if only' land, can you? Well, I know some people do, but I don't. If I did, I'd have never gotten over what my mother inflicted upon me. In other news, though, it seems my mind has been taken off him in another way, the way Ahmed suggested, in fact.

"Come here, you fell asleep with those false eyelashes on! Look at this!" Katya announces to me in bed on Saturday morning, just under two weeks after I first met her and had what I thought would be a one-night stand. I've seen her four times since then. She's just reached across and pulled off one of the false eyelashes I did indeed fall asleep wearing, after we'd had copious amounts of sex, that is.

"I wondered why it felt like I had spiders crawling across my eyes," I exclaim, pulling off the other one while she laughs. She met me from work last night, and we went for some late night eats and a few drinks, and today we're going to the movies to watch a screening of the old classic Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. Harrison Ford has to be my favourite actor. I sometimes wish I'd been born pre-disaster, so I could have enjoyed his films while he was still alive.  

After that, I'll be coming home to have some Edie time before I'm going out with my friends, but I've planned to see Katya again next Wednesday before I go to work. Again, last night when we came home, I could feel Angel right outside, just as he has been any other time she's been here. He stays until dawn is about to break and then I feel him leave, the blood tie getting weaker when he isn't right outside my bedroom window. It would seem creepy, if I couldn't pick up on what he's feeling when he's out there. What I can sense from him are feelings of jealousy, resentment, and even sadness and longing.  

I've made sure my bedroom curtains have been closed fully together though, so that his possible face at the window hasn't scared the shit out Katya again like it did the first night she was ever here. To be honest, I have been wondering if he ever will get in touch with me again, or reveal himself to me when I know he's been watching. He only does it when I'm with Katya, though, never when I'm by myself. I have pondered popping down to the tattoo shop, but I don't want it to look like I'm chasing him.

"Tell you what, little miss spider lashes. I'm getting a little more used to where everything is in your kitchen now, so how about you go get showered and I'll make us some French toast. You got eggs and bread and all that?" Katya asks me, sitting up and giving my leg a little stroke from where it's sticking out from under the covers.

"Sure, means I can give you a proper kiss after I've brushed my teeth too," I say, about to move before she grabs my arm.

"When I stink like something died in my mouth too, I don't give a shit," she giggles, leaning around and giving me a big kiss. Okay, so her kisses don't arouse me as much as Angel's do, but she's damn good at it. After being held down by the gorgeous, leggy redhead and kissed within an inch of my life, we get up, me going to the bathroom and her heading to the kitchen. By the time I'm done in the shower, I move to the kitchen and immediately fall into hysterics, finding Katya naked but an apron and her skyscraper heels.

"I have to say, I approve of your outfit choice," I giggle while admiring the view.

"I thought you might! Anyway, sit down and eat before it goes cold." She says, before turning to fetch the coffee. I think I might be onto a good thing here, and not because she makes me breakfast in only heels and an apron. I can't say I'm looking for a relationship, and I've been very straight with her in letting her know that. She's fine with it as well, saying she's 'happy just getting to know you a little better' as the lady herself words it.  

After we've eaten and she's got herself ready, we leave my house, going to do a little shopping before we take a cab to the movie theatre for the 1pm showing. She's a great girl and we get on really well, the sex is good too, but I dunno. There isn't that sparkle there with her, you know when you first meet someone, and you get on so well with them that you're dying to see them again the second they leave your side? I don't get that with her.  

When we go our separate ways at 4pm later this afternoon, I register straight away that I feel nothing even remotely close to missing her, or excitement about seeing her again. I used to feel that with Angel, the second he'd leave my side, I'd miss him. I have a connection with him, but with Katya, from my point of view at least, I don't really feel we do. I suppose that's my feelings for Angel overshadowing it. I think I just need a little more time to adjust to the fact that I really am becoming emotionally attached to him, and I can't let myself. Maybe this whole thing with Katya is being marred by the fact that I feel so drawn to Angel, and felt that so very soon after meeting him as a detainee. It just grew even more when he was released.

"Why the hell can't you get over someone you were never even with, Edie Larissa Bailey?" I ask my reflection as I do my makeup later on after arriving home. Really, what's with me? This just isn't like me at all, as Ahmed correctly identified over two weeks ago, I usually don't get hung up on people. I'm very much a move onwards and upwards kinda gal. It's with this in mind that I continue my makeup applying routine, stick on a set of false nails and then dress ready for what promises to be a good night out. It's just me, Sasha and Miley tonight, and I meet the two lovely ladies at 7pm sharp down at a new bar that's opened up called The Lemon Tree, finding them sitting at a table close to the bar when I arrive ten minutes late.

"Sorry, sorry I just couldn't get a damned cab!" I reply, which is the honest truth.

"Too busy enjoying yourself with Katya, more like," Sasha teases me with before pushing a bourbon over ice across the table to me.

"No not at all, I saw her last night and she stayed over, and then we went to see a movie earlier, but went our separate ways at about 4pm," I explain.

"So, how's it going with her?" Miley asks, looking more excited about it than I actually feel.

"It's going well. I'm seeing her again next Wednesday. We're not serious though, and I don't want it to become that either. I'm just not looking for that.” Somehow, my friends don't quite look convinced.

"You're still thinking about him and what could be, aren't you?" Sasha gently suggests.

She’s got me. "A little, yes. Look, I really don't want to talk about him, girls. I think about him enough as it is, I just want to get on with things without his damned name being mentioned.” My request is honoured, receiving understanding nods before our conversation moves on.  

We have a really good night there at the new bar, well, we enjoy ourselves until around 9.30pm, when I'm ordering the last round of drinks before we move on to a club, when I attract the kind of attention I definitely don't want.

"Yeah you've got strange coloured hair, but I'd still do you, babe," some creep at the bar tells me, sidling on over to me.

"Oh, am I supposed to be grateful for that comment? What, you think my hair colour stands against me getting laid?" I turn my head to ask him.

"Woah, no need to bite my head off, sugar. Just being complimentary is all. What a nice little ass you have too," he then continues, before making the most fatal mistake he ever could. He reaches under my dress and squeezes my bare ass, earning himself a fist in the face when I turn around and punch him.

"Back off! You can’t just go around grabbing hold of any woman you please! You should be ashamed!" I shout at him before turning to take the drinks back to our table. Except when I go to walk away, the pervert who just grabbed my ass stops me in my tracks by grabbing a handful of my hair, dragging me backwards before slapping my face a few times. The other men around the bar immediately jump to my aid, Sasha even steaming over holding a chair while people shout 'hey, let go of her!' and similar all around us.  

Everything starts to spin into frenzy as I feel myself being dragged backwards, my scalp burning as I try and reach back to elbow him. He grabs my wrist, moving me as I struggle against him, and just before he goes to smack my head off the actual bar itself, there's suddenly a boom of the bar doors crashing open, and a voice so loud and scary following it, the entire bar goes quiet in an instant.

"Let her the fuck go. Now," Angel booms from the door, pointing at the man who has hold of me. The man stops just as everyone else has, but yet he still has hold of me by my hair. I blink, and Angel is right in front of us, staring at the man so hard and so coldly, I really don't know what is about to happen. The man smirks, actually squaring up to him. Oh dude, big, big mistake. When you've a vampire looming over you, growling in the back of his throat, a growl that sounds eerily inhuman, and a pissed off crease in his forehead with the same depth as the Grand Canyon, you back down. For the sake of your life, you back down.

"I said let her go," he hisses in a dangerously quiet voice, his eyes set in an unblinking stare. Still the man looks defiant.

"What fucking business is it of yours, huh?" he almost laughs. I can see half the bar already starting to wince, the half that know just how dangerous vampires are when they're annoyed. Just then, Angel's hand shoots out, gripping the man's wrist so hard, I hear bones shattering under the strain, the man screaming in pain before finally, he lets go of the painful tug upon my hair.

"Are you okay?" He asks, while continuing to crush the wrist within his grasp. I nod, actually trembling a little. I'm not scared of what happened, I'm trembling because of the wild emotions running through me, Angel picking up on the fact I was in trouble and zooming to my side immediately.

"If you ever, ever come near her again I will personally rip out all of your organs in alphabetical order, drain your blood and leave what is left for my wolves to eat for dinner. Do you fucking hear me?" He snarls, hand moving to grip around his throat as he continues to growl at him. Goddamn, that's a scary noise, the sound of a vampire growling with displeasure. It neither sounds human or animal.

"Y-yep, I-I p-promise man, j-j-just let go of me, I won't come near her again," the man stammers, scared and embarrassed as he realises being cocky with a vampire really didn’t earn him any favours.

"Damned straight, you won't," Angel vouches, literally throwing him from one side of the bar to the other with one hand. The man's body goes flying through the air before it crashes against the many bottles and glasses stacked behind the bar, the wood behind where they were all placed completely broken through. Still, everyone is silent, just staring at Angel as he takes his wallet out and then pulls a credit card from it.

"Please, ring up the estimated costs of the damages on that. I'm sorry I had to smash up a part of your establishment, but no one does that to her and gets away with it," he tells the bar owner who is standing by the register looking stunned.

"Erm, that's very good of you. Thanks,” he nods, taking the card from Angel with a slightly shaky hand and putting it into the credit card machine by the register. Once he's charged up the amount and Angel tells him to take another five hundred dollars for his trouble, he takes his card back and then turns to me.

"I need to talk to you; I won't keep you five minutes.” Taking my hand and leading me from the bar as everyone all around begins to talk again, the music starting up once more too, I indicate to my friends I'll just be a minute before heading outside. Once we’ve left, he leads me away from the frontage of the bar and down to a small alleyway three buildings along. Letting go of my hand, he stands and stares at me for a few moments, shaking his head sadly, kissing my forehead as he takes my face in my hands. I look up at him, and see his eyes brimming with bloodied tears.

"Angel, what..." is as far as I can get, before he leans down and kisses me. He kisses me with everything he has, it almost feels, a kiss that is ten times more intense than any other I can remember sharing with him, or with anyone else for that matter. Oh fuck, this isn't good. Two weeks apart and he still can’t fight the urge to kiss me, and I still can’t pull away from it either when he does.

"I'm sorry for kissing you again, but it's the last time I'll ever do it, so I wanted it to be a good one, one that I'll remember for the centuries without you to come," he begins, sounding very serious and dramatic. Just as I'm about to ask him what he's talking about, he continues. "I can't see you again, Edie. Not ever. It's too hard, wanting you in the way I do, without being able to have you. It isn't just sex; it goes beyond that. Maybe if it were, I could get over you, but the only way I can is to cut you out of my life completely. I don't want to do it, please see that I don't. But I have to," he states, blinking two bloodied tears down his face. Inside, I feel like my heart just burst, but not in a good way. The sadness I feel is only multiplied more by the fact I can feel the exact same thing coming from him. He doesn't want this. Neither of us do.  

"I understand, I don't like it, but I understand if this is what you feel is best, then I have to begrudgingly accept your wishes. I just know I won't forget about you as easily as you'll forget about me, but I have to just deal with it. Bye, Angel," I sob, turning away with tears in my eyes that I don't want him to see. Just then, I feel both of his arms lock around me, stopping me from walking another step.

"Do you want to know when I'll forget you, Edie? I'll forget you after the faces of every other person I've ever loved blink themselves out of my memory, and all that's left is you. So don't, don't tell me I'll forget you easily, when I never, ever will. In hearing that, you should damn well know what you mean to me, and it's because you mean so much to me that I have to let you go. Just don't ever, ever think it's because I wanted to." Those are his last words to me, for a second later, he's gone, out of my life forever.  

Standing here alone, I uncomfortably absorb the shock of his words, or at least try to deal with how it's made me feel, to know I'm never going to see him again. I know Aileen suggested to me that perhaps not seeing him would be the best thing, but nothing could have prepared me for what I feel right now, like a cold wave has washed over me, knocking me down completely. I feel capsized, in the middle of a lonely sea, tears rolling down my cheeks as it hits me. I’m never going to see him again.  

Angel's POV

I hate myself right now. I absolutely, categorically, did not want to do what I just did. I do not want to cut Edie out of my life, but I have to. I can’t be around her; it's destroying me enough, having her on my mind constantly, even though I haven't seen her for two weeks. In those few minutes I spent with her tonight, though, it all came bubbling up, everything about her that pulls me in closer than any other human has through my entire time being a vampire. Feeling her feelings right now, I know she's upset, and all I want to do is go back and wrap her in my arms, tell her I'll never leave her side again. I can't, though, I have to be without her, and there is absolutely no way around it. I'll never forget her, because she's simply unforgettable.

Her strength, her resolution that no one or nothing would stop her from being happy, from surviving after all she was put through, how calm and peaceful she makes me feel, how I know her presence helps me settle into myself more, how I feel nothing but contented and happy when she's around, how I love those beautiful blue eyes and her little giggle, none of it will leave me.  

Every memory I have of her is burned into my mind, ready to replay when I feel myself missing her. At least, just fleetingly, I knew her at all. Every time I've had sex with Sissy or any other vampire over the last fortnight, it's been Edie I've thought of, Edie's face I've seen, Edie, Edie, Edie. I can't get her out of my mind, so cutting her out of my life is what I have to do. I can’t torture myself, and I can’t do the same to her either.  

"So, where was the fire?" Eric asks, when I zoom back into the tattoo shop and glove up again quickly, apologising to my client, who left sitting here in the chair when I felt Edie's distress flare up massively. Luckily, she's okay about it now I've returned to finish her tiger tattoo, which stretches down the side of her ribcage. I wouldn’t really care if she wasn’t, though. Edie comes first. Came first. Past tense now.  

"I just had something to attend to, nothing to concern you." My words are delivered with a look that tells him loud and clear not to question me further, Eric taking the hint and turning back to the light box, where he's sketching out a line drawing without another word. I don't want to talk about Edie to anyone ever again. Her name is not to be mentioned to me, and once we're clear of clients, I actually let Eric know that.

"Alright, dude. There’ll be no further mention of the E word. It's a fucking shame, though, she was a nice girl.  I liked the influence she had on you. You were more chilled when she was around, even though that time was very brief. Sorry, man," he offers, looking about as sympathetic as a vampire can.

"Yeah, it is a shame." is all I reply with before my next client comes through the door and I'm busy getting her line drawing done of the photograph of her two twin babies she wants etching onto her shoulder. Portraits are tricky, getting that likeness absolutely spot on, and I enjoy the hour it takes me to do them both, because I concentrate so hard on getting the two faces exactly like the photo, that Edie is taken away from my thoughts completely.  

It isn't until I'm finished for the night that I pick up on her, and I know she's still upset. It's like everything within her is calling to me to come and make it all better again, I know she wants me to be by her side as much as I truly want to be there. Nothing has ever made me feel this weak, nothing as a human or a vampire, for that matter. I cannot cave to her though, I just can't do it.

"My dear child, what on earth is the matter? Your sadness, it weighs on you so heavily," Ursula asks me with concern, after following me up to my room later on, where I was hoping to abscond to for a little privacy.

"Earlier this evening, I told Edie I never want to see her again, that's what's weighing heavily upon me," I mutter, staring at the floor until I feel her fingers lifting my chin. She then lays a little kiss on my lips before sitting down, wrapping me in a hug.

"This is not something you truly want either, is it?" I shake my head to indicate my reply is a firm no. "I must say I am disappointed in how you've just given up, but I know the reason why you have, and why it would be too difficult to keep her in your life," she begins before for the first time ever, I cut her up.

"I know what you're getting at, but it isn't that, and I don't want to speak of Edie for a moment longer, because I can’t. I'm sorry." I state, unravelling from her embrace and leaving the house again just as quickly as I came.

“Angel, wait,” she calls.  

“No. I need to be alone.” I throw over my shoulder, while hurtling from the house. That was the first time I ever dared interrupt my creator, and I wasn't scolded for it as I expected. I guess she knows only too well what turmoil I'm going though right now, that the maelstrom of thoughts circling my brain is too much for me even as a vampire to begin dealing with. Cutting Edie from my life is what I needed to do, but yet the aftermath of doing that has sent my thoughts into total chaos. So much chaos that I unintentionally end up somewhere I probably shouldn't have gone, either.

Walking through the Nevada desert, sand pouring into my boots with every step, I hear the noises it yields all around me like sonic booms. Rattlesnakes, crickets, everything is even more amplified to my ears right now, my senses blazing. I wish there was something I could imbibe, to take the edge of what I feel, an intoxicant of some kind. I can’t be bothered to go virgin hunting, though, which is the only thing that works in getting us drunk, so I'm stuck with mentally wrestling everything in my head. I'd switch myself off, but it'd only be there when I was fully alert again.  

“I wish I'd never met you, Edie.” I say aloud, into the nothingness of the desert. Or rather, what I think is nothingness.

"Who's Edie then? Another girl you had sex with and killed at the end?" I hear a voice ask me. Fuck, fucking fuck! I shouldn't have come to this specific place, because of a fact about vampires you do not know (do you? I stand corrected if you do). We can communicate loud and clear with the dead, with ghosts. We can see them, hear them and talk to them, whereas they seldom make themselves known to humans. It's very difficult for the dead to connect with the living, but with vampires, since we’re dead too, it means we can. Who I just heard was the ghost of the last human girl I tried to have sex with. Of course, I buried her out here. That is a fact I had completely forgotten about, until I heard her voice.

"Kate," I sigh awkwardly, turning around and seeing her transparent form walking across the sand to me.

"That's all you can say, just my name? After you killed me and buried me out here instead of giving me a proper grave, that's all you can say, 'Kate'?" she continues tersely.

"I couldn't help it, I'm sorry," I tell her honestly.

"Yeah, I know that, now! Five years ago, while I was still fucking alive it might have been nice to be given the option of death by orgasm or not, don't you think? Selfish vampire asshole," she fumes at me, seething sarcasm. I can't blame her for it, she's dead because of me, after all.

"I really should have given you the choice, but I was confident in the fact I could control myself, when I really couldn't. You paid for my mistake with your life, and I do feel genuine regret over that," I explain. God, this is bad. I didn’t think I’d ever have to deal with the consequences of my actions in such a direct way.

She snorts loudly, folding her arms. "Hah, you're a vampire. Like you regret anything!”

"I do, believe me I do," I enforce to her.

"I should have known better than to trust one of your kind. My daddy told me you were all bad, completely selfish, blood sucking, murdering assholes! I had so much to live for, Angel!" she cries.

"I'm so sorry, Kate. I wish I'd never have bothered, and you're right, I was selfish. Not any more though," I tell her, feeling just as awful as I did when I gently laid her body into the ground five years ago.

"Oh really, with how many lives lost to you, you decide that now? Well, that's too fucking late for me! My parents, they still search for me, you know. I've trailed after them screaming as they've walked this desert, calling my name over and over, I've been shouting at the top of my fucking voice that I'm there with them, but they just can't see me. You broke my parent's hearts, you fucking bastard! I was twenty-one years old!" she continues to vent at me, beginning to cry.

"I said I'm fucking sorry! I didn't want you to die; I didn't want any of you to die!" I roar at her, turning and then moving to right in front of her ghostly form. "I didn't want to end up murdering you, you need to believe that. Now stop fucking haunting me and fuck off."  

"Whoever Edie is, I hope she's still alive." Those are the last words Kate speaks, for when I turn around, her ghost is gone. It makes it hit home even more, how I really cannot let the same happen to her. I've done the right thing by her in refusing to see her again, severing all ties with her. It feels like the most wrong though, the most wrong thing I've done in recent years. I feel like I'm fighting against my nature somehow, which is because, to emphasise my point once more, I did not want this. I came to this resolve four hours ago, and it feels like four years have passed since I kissed her goodbye in that alleyway. No woman has ever made me feel like this in my vampirism, no one at all.

I also feel angry at myself, for giving up on befriending a human, my sex drive as well as other factors I'm not prepared to admit to myself driving a massive wedge in the way of it. It makes me feel weak, and I am far from it. I’m proud and strong, yet I've given in at the first hurdle, because of a massive weakness for Edie. I feel like I'm failing Ursula, too, in the fact she told me I should treat this as a test of my maturity. I just gave up, because it was easier to do so, but I did what I did for Edie, ultimately. I'm no good for her. I'll just keep messing her around, making my actions betray my words all the time, not having the willpower just to be her friend.

"See, your life is simple. Reproduce, eat, look cute, and hide from snakes." I tell a wild fennec fox I see running out from between his den to a large rock, stopping mid-way and staring at me. There are so many little critters around here that you wouldn't have found in the Nevada desert a hundred years ago. Fennec foxes, native to Africa, are just one of them. He makes a little noise and two more come running out before the three of them scamper off at speed to another rock two hundred yards away. My life simple before Edie came along, but I know it'll get better in time. What I can't stand more than not seeing her is still being able to feel her, and right now she's not happy in the slightest. This is entirely my fault.

Knowing I need to feed, I head back into Las Vegas at speed, going to one place in particular. I make a visit to a vampire bar and find the first willing human I can to procure my second feed of the night, drink from him and then leave, heading to a place I really do know I more than likely shouldn't be going to. There's a large tree in Edie's back yard, and after shooting to near the top of it, I sit on the branch and look in through the open curtains of her lounge. 

She's sitting on the couch, all curled up in a ball, just staring at the flickering television in front of her. Feeling her through the blood tie, I can feel that she's really sad. Her head turns as many thoughts as mine does. I want to jump out of this tree and go let myself into her house, hold her tightly to me and tell her how wonderful she is and how she shouldn't be sad over me. She'll find someone, in fact I think she already has found someone. I'll never find anyone else like her.

After a few minutes she gets up and stands by the glass doors that lead out to her back yard, looking even sadder as she looks all around her garden. She can feel I'm close by, she's looking for me, so to not cause her further upset I leave at that moment, moving at speed until I'm up on the main road that leads back to where I live. I need the walk before I head home, because I know Ursula will have plenty to say when I arrive.  

I can refuse to talk to everyone else, and I even managed to hold her off for a little while, but I know I have it coming, her sitting me down to talk to me. She's always been the same, she's a very involved creator, who always wants the best for me. She'll get me to express my every thought to her, and then talk me through some sort of solution to the overall problem. Yet when I arrive, her simple statement requires nothing in depth, just the honest truth.  

"You’re in love with her, aren’t you?" she asks, as I close the front door behind me, turning to her.

I pause, sighing. “Yeah, I am.”  

[likeadevils]

the thing about the very first night is that it contains absolutely poetry like “not trying to fall in love, but we did like children running” right next to the absolute nonsense that is “i wish i could fly, i’d pick you up and we’d go back in time” as if flying = time travel, somehow???

[foxes-that-run]

Flying, planes and passports

Taylor

Red: Loving him is like trying to change your mind once you’re already flying through the free fall

I Knew You Were Trouble: Flew me to places I’d never been

Everything Has Changed: The beautiful kind, making up for lost time, taking flight, making me feel like

Come Back… Be Here: One last kiss, then catch your flight / Spinning faster than the plane that took you

The Very First Night: I wish I could fly, I’d pick you up and we’d go back in time

Blank Space: Ain’t it funny, rumors fly and I know you’ve heard about me' and 'grab your passport and my hand'

Out Of The Woods: Two paper airplanes flying, flying, flying

End Game: I’m in a G5, yeah, come to the A-side, yeah

I Did Something Bad: So I fly 'em all around the world and I let them think they saved me

Getaway Car: We were flying, but we’d never get far

False God: Remember how I’d fly to you?

Gold Rush: I don’t like that falling feels like flying ‘til the bone crush

Right Where You Left Me: Trends change, rumors fly through new skies

Snow On The Beach: And my flight was awful, thanks for asking /  Flying in a dream, stars by the pocketful

Labyrinth: I thought the plane was going down, how’d you turn it right around?

Harry

Daylight: If I was a bluebird / I would fly to ya' and 'You're in your airplane seat

Love of my Life Don't know where you'll land when you fly

Already home: From aeroplanes to the bullet trains, summer skies to the pouring rain

If I Could Fly: If I could fly, I'd be coming right back home to you

Fools Gold: You're the shining distraction that makes me fly home

Keep Driving: Passports in footwells Kiss her and don't tells

Complicated Freak: Back seat of the car and up in the air

Story of my Life: But, baby, runnin' after you is like chasin' the clouds