#life upd
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sorry for radio silence the past week i got sick and bedridden for a few days 😔
#life upd#if u even care#when i came back to classes everyone was also sick i think everyones getting sick now fsr#stay safe everyone!
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[Day 135] "Me paps took me on a long journey across the black isles when i was a child. It was one of me fondest times" or small ren because i rewatched third life and couldnt stop thinking about how much red king ren talks about his childhood
#UPD THANKS ILEXDIAPASON FOR CORRECTING ME IN THE TAGS.#dailyrd#rendog#rendog fanart#third life smp#< technically??#mod woop
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maddie from pantheon 🏛
#pantheon#pantheon amc#maddie kim#studies#this show is such an underrated gem#i still can't believe it got scrapped that way#UPD IT WAS BROUGHT BACK TO LIFE#I'M SO HAPPY
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i. habve not been drawing a lot lately and for that im sorry .
lifes been rough and ive been in an art drought lately, though i am getting some inspo back so thats good !!
...sadly im gonna be pretty busy in the coming week so uhhh we'll see what happens ig
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Hanging tree but it's about Byler in the apocalypse...
#will byers#mike wheeler#byler#stranger things#forever bitter they changed it in the movie like the entire point is that katniss has been wondering that life may not be worth living#not with peeta first being tortured by the capital ans then being so damaged beyond repair after his brainwashing#and Katniss feeling like a hollow shell of who she once was and suffering from chronic depression (whilst also having to be the mockingjay)#she spent the last two books keep trying to save peeta but now she wonders if it's better if she ans peeta would die so they wouldn't-#-have to suffer anymore#now is this peeta!will who's been taken to the upd again and comes back changed beyond repair?#while mike who is tired of continuous living like this worrying about if his loved ones will live another day#or a vecna-plagued mike (in an attempt to hurt will) comes back changed while will gains his powers and a more active player#and maybe mike's also been brainwashed to some degree like peeta and hates will#while will wishes he were dead and maybe that it would be better for mike if he were too
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no sims for a while bc the heat, I hope everyone stays cool and hydrated and don't forget your daily clicks! ♡
#moreover my laptop fans are doing much worse so idk how itll be even when the heat wave ends#we'll cross that bridge when we get there ig#lil life upd: that lifestyle change is still going strong its now my new normal! its fun im rly enjoying it and adding new things slowly#not getting into any details but mentally and physically im doing much better than i probably ever have!!
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I recently feel so strange about having a simblr, because I just.. I feel like I'm in a time loop, like time is non-existent thing for me and I just don't have any energy to catch up with the posts and how fast and how much is everything progressing and going. I just can't, and it's really difficult for me to force myself to catch up, I hate myself for it since I want and always wanted to be in this community, but it all feels so intense and strange for me, I just... I feel like I'm so far behind, like I need to stop being here because I'm too slow, too tired, too overwhelmed by everything maybe?.. I don't know what I'm really trying to say here, but like... I feel so out of touch or whatever.
#nonsins#olya's rambles#delete later#tw vent#kinda#upd: I'm also really scared of interacting with other simblrs/people because I feel so... alienated maybe?#I have literally no friends besides my siblings and co-workers in real life and I just.. I feel hurt by the understanding that I'm cursed#cursed with loneliness and it feels so painful and I can't cope with it but making friends or frequently chatting with someone hurts more#I feel like I'm not made for friendship. eternal loneliness? yes#probably#might be weird to say but I feel so small so wrong so- I feel so fucking lonely but every time I try being friends it's not going well#am I too much? yes but it's me and I can't hide my feelings I can't hide my emotions I can't even mask well#I always talk too much I always say too much I always react too emotional#I just can't be normal I can't be like any other normal person because I'm certainly not one#do I even deserve to have friends in the first place? probably not I'm annoying as hell I'm loud I'm too much I'm overwhelming everyone#better stay away from friendship I guess better just... just be alone#I feel so nauseous right now I don't know just talking about it and acknowledging it HURTS.
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wish i could blog all the time about the most intimate parts of my life here but unfortunately im too worried about my privacy : (
#forrealsies i mean.......id love to dump all my shit here#whatever.... anyway it looks like i may not be kicked out of my house... omggggg#but yeah often i go to make a post and then im like..............nah.............................. bad idea to share this one#^ happened again i cut out like most of the stuff in the post body & tags but im leaving this part here cus its funny#and also the news. for the life upd.8
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Okay, so I didn't pass my dream school. I don't know if I should feel happy or not kasi hindi rin naman ako doon tutuloy if makapasa. I don't know maybe the reassurance that I was good enough for it would've been nice. Damn, I can't even push myself to be happy for those who passed. Or take them up on that recon LMAO. Buti na lang may Greening this week jusme
#well there it goes my once in a lifetime chance#rejection is redirection after all#admission season ends in angst#2/3 univs po ang napasahan ko hehe#nakkaiyak tbh#see you next life UP or kung magmasters ako diyan#i'll try again#but goodbye for now#(applications for UPD jowa are still open though)
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The more chapters of Was Born To Lead I write, the more I realize there more likely will be no “The History of the History Man” chapter.
#Personal#Was Born To Lead#It’s not like that I just erased Valerio’s backstory it just… doesn’t seem to be fitting to the context anymore?#Valerio was supposed to TELL his story and now I just can’t imagine him rambling about his entire life starting with how his parents met#It just really makes no sense not to mention how long it will turn out#It’s not one or even not two chapters of my usual length#Which also means there will be no Gabe and it obviously sucks#Besides it’s not really reasonable to drop all facts about his life at once?#I mean the next chapter also reveals a huge chunk of his backstory so the chapter ALL about his past might turn out repetitive#So for now I think I’ll limit it by telling the core part aka the one what happened after he got his scars#It’s gonna be a flashback chapter like the thirteenth one about young Valerio#(which means I have so much unused material for writing a separate novel about Valerio)#Honestly I just have strange feelings about it because#I started babbling about the chapter all about Valerio’s past as soon as I introduced him XD#This is one of the oldest chapter concepts I came up with and now I’m just turning away from it aakjsndk#But this is for the better really#And you can’t imagine how many other ideas I abandoned as I kept writing the fic so this is not such a big deal#Especially since I’m not abandoning everything I created for him I abandoned the chapter#All the ideas are still alive and I can come up with another way of how to bring them to life#Upd: hehe okay I think I actually know how to transfer Valerio’s backstory into another chapter#I love my brain
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god I've been eyeing this very cool person for FOREVER and today finally got the courage to shoot them a message I hope they respond !!
#/txt#i really need someone with their energy in my life 😭😭😭#upd: got left on read for now lets see how it goes
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K *going to check one more band from the "awww they awesome" list*: hmm probably another popular one not for our ears
the band:
youtube
☀️: OUCH.
#k's wave#heeding the call#sing for me#*flight engineer relates angrily*#the fuck this life is#we liked everything about the song so#soon in our playlist next at least to Sleeping With Sirens we guess#upd: close to Annisokay. fuck.#bad omens
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rage quits hollow knight but in the quietest way possible (closes my eyes, breathes deeply, and proceeds to turn off my switch)
#it's a good game. wish i was good at it!#snaily blabber#life upd ate: i am hibernating and playing Games.
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As fearless in death, as he was in life...
I want to share this with someone, unfortunately my friends don't play Skyrim
The random encounter inspired me to create this animation. I was once attacked by a Thalmor. My dog Meeko was with me, so I got the impression that the Thalmor were talking to him :]
Upd: If you liked this video, please support it on my youtube channel (◕‿◕) Thank you ♡
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When I read the last upd I remembered this post ⬇️ and that's how I see both Leo's views on each other:
The way that P!Leo sees F!Leo as this kind of hero because he's the one who kept fighting for his family over and over again in the apocalypse, because even after all those years he tried his best to save them. I notice that P!Leo almost acts like F!Leo is not literally an older version of him, but some kind of superhero, he says "I'm the one who almost started the apocalypse, i shouldn't even have asked"as if F!Leo didn't actually start it, because he sees F!Leo by his actions IN the apocalypse. Like yeah, he did cause the apocalypse, but he also fought against it every second of his life, not only for him, but for the people that mattered to him as well. He grew up, stronger than ever, that's what matters. F!Leo is not a bad person, he was just sixteen, he didn't know any better at that point, but he dealt with the consequences of it, like a hero would do.
And then p!Leo is F!Leo's reassurance that, no, he wasn't a terrible person when he was young, and, yes, he WOULD have done it differently if he knew, because he'd never ever hurt his family the way he did by causing the apocalypse, at least not on purpose. Differently from P!Leo, I guess that F!Leo actually gets the concept of P!Leo being literally the same person as him (especially after casey talks to him about it and he sees P!Leo saying "they made it about me when they took my brother") and that's why he critiques P!Leo so much at the start (*points to leo* the self-hate and low self-esteem are strong on this one) but grows kind with him so easily. P!Leo is not a bad person, he's just sixteen, he didn't know any better at that point, but once he did, he dealt with the consequences of it, like a hero would do.
They're each others proof that their mistakes do not define who they are, and that they'd have fought for their families anyway
Yes yes YES. EXACTLY.
I genuinely couldn't have said it better
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UPD - I drew Heather into another picture I took while exploring the South East USA coast! I’m not from the USA originally so it was so INSPIRING to see all the nature I love in real life, not just the photos. Heather is enjoying it a lot, too >:) --- Spotted her on the backyard... (and can you find her frog friend here?) --- HD-version, behind the scenes and many other things can be found in my Patreon
#heather greenmire#Southern Gothic#art#photo#mix#creepy#spooky#macabre#horror#artists on tumblr#original art#original character#nataliedecorsair#natalie de corsair
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